Giggling about botox, tanning beds, and nipple piercings

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Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Cozy season is upon us, which is one of my favorites. I love a chill, crisp morning, and I love opening the window and like feeling it on my face. I also love when it's raining and you're having a movie marathon. And that's why you also need Bombas to make your comfiest fall staples go with all your favorite fall things. So you can make the most out of one of the best seasons of the year. Like the new suede moccasins are perfect for fall with cushy soles, a sheerling lining, and water-resistant suede. For every item you purchase, an essential clothing item is donated to somebody facing housing insecurity. Bombas truly is the best, and I've replaced all my socks with Bombas. Head over to Bombas.com/gigglysquad and use

• 0:42Paige DeSorbo?

  code GIGGLYSQUAD for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S.com/gigglysquad, code GIGGLYSQUAD at checkout.

• 0:51Hannah Berner?

  This episode is sponsored by Cars.com. I feel like your car says a lot about you. It's transportation, storage, and honestly, kind of a personality test. Maybe you need something for weekend road trips, something you can actually parallel park in the city, or just enough trunk space for an emergency outfit and backup shoes. Personally, I like options and I'm very specific. So this is where Cars.com comes in. Cars.com has the tools that make your car shopping way less overwhelming. With more than 200 advanced search filters, you can narrow things down based on what actually matters to you. Deal badges help show how fairly a vehicle is priced, so you can browse with more confidence and fewer chaotic tabs open, which I think we can all appreciate. Start your search with Cars.com. Where to next?

• 1:35Hannah Berner?

  I was thinking about how women have so many little things we have to do when we're getting home that you have to be aware of.

• 1:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Like so many people have my location.

• 1:43Hannah Berner?

  And you have to share your ETA, you have to check the route, you have to text everyone I'm home.

• 1:47Paige DeSorbo?

  And if your friend like doesn't text you, "Oh, you got home," you're calling the FBI.

• 1:52Hannah Berner?

  Yep. Yep. And we joke about it because it's so normal to us, but you're constantly paying attention. And even when you're exhausted and just want to get home, your brain still has to be on. You're like, is this guy going the right route? Am I in the right place? Who's around me? What's happening?

• 2:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, there's truly no clocking out of your safety.

• 2:09Hannah Berner?

  And that's why riding in a Waymo feels different. It's an autonomous ride with an empty driver's seat. So once you get in, you have this private space that's actually just yours.

• 2:17Paige DeSorbo?

  And you know, I love alone time, and I truly feel like it's such a luxury in a Waymo.

• 2:21Hannah Berner?

  Especially after being social. Like, I love everyone, but like...

• 2:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Please, nobody speak to me.

• 2:26Hannah Berner?

  Like, give me 20 minutes. I want music, the right temperature. There's no compromising, and you can customize the ride, put on your own music, answer texts you ignored all night, stare out the window. You actually have a minute where you're not thinking about everyone else.

• 2:39Paige DeSorbo?

  And that's the thing. It's not even necessarily about doing something. Sometimes it's just, you want to sit there and not speak.

• 2:46Hannah Berner?

  And put your guard down for a second and feel safe.

• 2:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Which truly women deserve.

• 2:51Hannah Berner?

  We deserve to disassociate safely for 20 minutes.

• 2:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I mean, put that on a t-shirt, for real.

• 2:57Hannah Berner?

  And obviously, safety is a huge part of why that feeling matters. Knowing Waymo's safer, there's something refreshing in having that space where you can just be yourself and let Waymo handle the driving.

• 3:06Paige DeSorbo?

  And we spend enough of our lives being on.

• 3:09Hannah Berner?

  Exactly.

• 3:10Paige DeSorbo?

  We don't need to be on in the car.

• 3:12Hannah Berner?

  Getting around shouldn't require so much mental energy. And if this sounds like your ideal way to get around too, download the Waymo app and use code GIGLY to get 20% off your next two rides. You could check out the full terms in the app.

• 3:25Paige DeSorbo?

  We love a discount.

• 3:26Hannah Berner?

  And if Waymo isn't in your city yet, head to waymo.com/gigly to sign up and help bring Waymo to you.

• 3:33Speaker 02

  Sup, Gigglers? Carrie, fix the wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.

• 3:43Speaker 02

  I mean, the day just got away from me.

• 3:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Hello.

• 3:52Paige DeSorbo?

  How did I know that's...

• 3:54Hannah Berner?

  Why was that?

• 3:54Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, that was just, it was great. It was great. It's actually how I needed to start the pod today.

• 3:59Hannah Berner?

  Wait, Paige said, I told her a way that I want her to start the pod. She said, don't creative direct me. She has something to start it.

• 4:05Paige DeSorbo?

  This pod is 50/50.

• 4:06Hannah Berner?

  So, please, how would you like to start it?

• 4:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Two men?

• 4:10Hannah Berner?

  She's pointing at the camera.

• 4:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, I have to say something, and nobody knows. My mom doesn't even know. And I've been holding it in for almost seven days. And I haven't, I'm literally, that's why I haven't been texting you back, because I'm like, I have to tell.

• 4:27Hannah Berner?

  Wait, we actually have had kind of a quiet back and forth week.

• 4:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Sure.

• 4:30Hannah Berner?

  Because you didn't want to lie to me.

• 4:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 4:32Hannah Berner?

  Can I guess?

• 4:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I feel like you know it.

• 4:34Hannah Berner?

  You got Botox.

• 4:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 4:36Paige DeSorbo?

  No, okay, so I go into the appointment. First of all, I go into the appointment after we record.

• 4:42Hannah Berner?

  Guys, wait, this is cra- you guys, this has never happened in the history of Giggly Squad.

• 4:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Page six, now's your time to shine. This is hot goss off the press.

• 4:53Hannah Berner?

  Hot goss, she froze her eggs and then she froze her face. Continue.

• 4:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, so.

• 4:58Hannah Berner?

  They say headline, continue.

• 5:01Hannah Berner?

  Wait, continue, I'm so excited.

• 5:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Sorry, okay, so I go to the doctor after we record Giggly Squad last week.

• 5:09Hannah Berner?

  And let's be honest, after you record Giggly Squad, you're raw. You're feeling vulnerable, you have nothing left to give.

• 5:13Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm like, you can literally convince me of anything right now. So I sit down and she's like, how did you hear about me? Like, tell me, tell me like what brings you, I literally thought it was like a therapist. Like, the way she worded it, she was like, what are your goals, what are your aspirations?

• 5:28Hannah Berner?

  She was like, how are your innards?

• 5:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, and I was like, look, I'm very skin focused, skin forward, before botox and injections and all of that. And I was like, and not because I'm against it at all, I just know myself and I know I'm gonna be obsessed with it. And she's like, okay, honestly, you're building it up so much, like, get over it, you're 33. Yeah, she was like, how have you even lasted this long?

• 5:53Hannah Berner?

  And she goes, you're geriatric in terms of pregnancy.

• 5:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Literally, she was like, you look 102, thank god you found me.

• 5:59Hannah Berner?

  But this is the problem, when you talk to botox people,

• 6:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes.

• 6:02Hannah Berner?

  They're so used to talking about it that they are very like, babe, who gives a fuck?

• 6:06Paige DeSorbo?

  And she was like, tell me what your biggest fears are regarding it.

• 6:10Hannah Berner?

  Or in life.

• 6:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, honestly, we got into it. The appointment was only 30 minutes, I was there for a full hour.

• 6:16Hannah Berner?

  Was she like, see what's happening under your eye here, that's from the stress of.

• 6:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, she goes, I've been watching you talk, so I can tell how your face already moves. And I'm, and I can already tell you that I wouldn't even give you a full amount that I give.

• 6:29Hannah Berner?

  Transplant?

• 6:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, like, she's like, your face, you don't have to.

• 6:31Hannah Berner?

  We can use some of the face, we'll keep some of it.

• 6:34Paige DeSorbo?

  She was like, I'm, I guess the normal is like 60 cc's, I don't even know.

• 6:39Hannah Berner?

  I think it's for boobs.

• 6:40Paige DeSorbo?

  I wouldn't even go up to that, like, I would give you 40. And so I'm still like, okay.

• 6:44Hannah Berner?

  Are we talking about Prozac, are we talking about?

• 6:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Who knows? At this point, I'm like, I don't, we're having.

• 6:49Hannah Berner?

  Where's the numbers start?

• 6:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Big Pharma. Big Pharma got involved.

• 6:52Hannah Berner?

  Wait, when she started saying numbers, do I blank?

• 6:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I was like, four. So I'm sitting there and I'm like, like when I get uncomfortable, I do just like things like with my hands. And so I'm like visibly uncomfortable and I'm like, I gotta walk out of this appointment. I'm not just like going rogue and getting botox. I'm alone on a Monday afternoon. Like I didn't even tell my mom I was going to this appointment. I thought she was gonna like.

• 7:14Hannah Berner?

  Oh, she was gonna yell at you.

• 7:15Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought she was gonna hit me with like, oh, let's do like microdermabrasion and then like we'll wait on botox.

• 7:20Hannah Berner?

  I thought you were gonna say she was gonna hit me with a pan or something.

• 7:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Honestly, who knows? I mean.

• 7:26Hannah Berner?

  Hit me with the panini. Okay, so you're there alone, you're scared, you're hungry.

• 7:31Paige DeSorbo?

  So I'm sitting there, I'm like visibly uncomfortable.

• 7:33Hannah Berner?

  You're naked and afraid.

• 7:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, she's like, what are your biggest fears? And I go, well, I told my best friend that I would do this with her. And so now not only am I betraying her, but like I haven't even told my mom. Like no one even, no one knows I'm here, right? I literally felt like I was a spy.

• 7:51Hannah Berner?

  But the thing is botox is such an individual experience where like you need to have your moment alone.

• 7:56Paige DeSorbo?

  I need to be alone.

• 7:57Hannah Berner?

  To be like, what's really going on? Cause we can't do like a two for one, like that's crazy.

• 8:02Paige DeSorbo?

  She was like, she was like, okay, I'm gonna do it.

• 8:06Hannah Berner?

  Oh, so she basically goes.

• 8:07Paige DeSorbo?

  She was like, okay, we're gonna do it.

• 8:09Hannah Berner?

  That's me at the nail salon. They're like, we're not gonna do that color.

• 8:12Paige DeSorbo?

  She was like, you're not gonna hate it and if you do, it goes away and I like, you never have to come back here.

• 8:18Hannah Berner?

  What were your like areas that you were like, don't touch versus touch?

• 8:22Paige DeSorbo?

  I didn't say don't touch anything. Obviously I brought up my orbital bone.

• 8:28Paige DeSorbo?

  And she goes, it's more noticeable to you than it is to the average person. I go.

• 8:32Hannah Berner?

  Have you seen the internet?

• 8:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Have you ever heard of Giggly Squad? Have you ever, have you heard of Instagram at all? And she's like, I can do like a little bit to help that, but like, so there was no places.

• 8:44Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, it looks the same.

• 8:46Paige DeSorbo?

  She was like, it takes 10 days to like really start working.

• 8:49Hannah Berner?

  Oh.

• 8:50Paige DeSorbo?

  So I'm like almost there.

• 8:52Hannah Berner?

  You're, you're six days in.

• 8:55Paige DeSorbo?

  And she said it'll be gone. In like four months.

• 8:57Hannah Berner?

  Okay, did she say because your metabolism is so fast, it's gonna?

• 9:01Paige DeSorbo?

  She didn't say. I go back next week for her to just like check in.

• 9:04Hannah Berner?

  Okay, so she was a facial balancing artist?

• 9:07Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know, but she was amazing. And you wanna know what? I, actually, I'm happy I even lasted this long. Botox has been being pushed to me since I was eight years old.

• 9:18Hannah Berner?

  Eight years old.

• 9:19Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, have you, yeah, were you alive? Watching any TV, like, aging has been pushed to women since, literally, before I was in puberty.

• 9:28Hannah Berner?

  I miss watching, like, Y2K, like, 2000s comedies, though, where the hot girls had normal lips.

• 9:35Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, you know I love a period piece.

• 9:36Hannah Berner?

  Yes.

• 9:37Paige DeSorbo?

  And...

• 9:39Hannah Berner?

  White chicks, my favorite period piece.

• 9:42Paige DeSorbo?

  And I can't watch a period piece if one of the actresses has Instagram face. Like, I just watched House of Guinness on Netflix, and, like, the main girl's stunning, gorgeous, but, like, she had her lips done, and I was like, they didn't have their lips done then, and so I can't...

• 9:56Hannah Berner?

  Dez said that it wasn't historically accurate, so we couldn't watch it.

• 9:59Paige DeSorbo?

  It wasn't historically accurate, he's correct, I looked it up after.

• 10:03Hannah Berner?

  Wait, so...

• 10:04Paige DeSorbo?

  But, phenomenal show.

• 10:05Hannah Berner?

  I need to dig in a little more, you can't just, you can't just drop that bomb and then leave, so, were you, like, what was your biggest fear?

• 10:13Paige DeSorbo?

  That I was gonna look different, and that I was gonna be addicted to it, which I am, I'm obsessed with.

• 10:18Hannah Berner?

  Wait, were you afraid that when I walked in today, I was gonna be like, have you seen Paige?

• 10:23Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I thought my mom, because I FaceTimed with my parents all the time, so I thought, and my mom has always been like, "Did you get your lips done?", and I'm like, "What? No, I just had a lot of salt yesterday", so, like, she's very on it with my face, so I thought...

• 10:37Hannah Berner?

  My mom would just be like, "When was the last time you did Pilates?"

• 10:42Paige DeSorbo?

  No, so I was nervous.

• 10:43Hannah Berner?

  Well, your eyebrows are moving.

• 10:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, like, I can raise my...

• 10:47Hannah Berner?

  They're still moving.

• 10:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 10:49Hannah Berner?

  Are they gonna, like, in the next couple of days, move less?

• 10:51Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know.

• 10:52Hannah Berner?

  You, we don't know, are you, are you, like, obsessed with looking at your face?

• 10:57Hannah Berner?

  Did, okay, do you want to tell the girls where you got it, or do you not know?

• 11:01Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm gonna put it in the newsletter, I'll put, like, where, I'll put, like, where, the doctor's office, the actual place I went to, the girl that did it, and we'll do, like, a whole rundown.

• 11:11Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I'm really happy for you.

• 11:13Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm really happy, too, like, I am excited for it.

• 11:16Hannah Berner?

  I'm excited.

• 11:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Also, it's gone in, like, five months, so, like...

• 11:18Hannah Berner?

  Also, I think, like, we've decided as a nation, that, like, Botox is great.

• 11:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Nothing matters.

• 11:25Hannah Berner?

  And filler is what you have to be afraid of.

• 11:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 11:27Hannah Berner?

  I actually almost got, there's, I don't know, I'm back on the algorithm of these doctors, would you get Botox done by a doctor whose face looks...

• 11:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Crazy?

• 11:40Hannah Berner?

  Or not even crazy, like...

• 11:41Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 11:41Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, you wouldn't.

• 11:42Paige DeSorbo?

  No, that's insane.

• 11:44Hannah Berner?

  See, sometimes I'm like...

• 11:46Paige DeSorbo?

  I feel like when you go to a plastic surgeon's office for anything, like you could be going to get like a mole removed.

• 11:52Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 11:53Paige DeSorbo?

  But the people working in the office are almost like examples, I feel like.

• 11:58Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, they're like mannequins.

• 11:59Paige DeSorbo?

  You specifically should be the number one example.

• 12:03Hannah Berner?

  But I kind of love a surgeon that's like never touched their face. And they're like-

• 12:08Paige DeSorbo?

  A surgeon that like doesn't believe in surgery.

• 12:10Hannah Berner?

  Like they're sagging and they're like-

• 12:12Paige DeSorbo?

  A surgeon that just judges you the whole time and is like, "I would never."

• 12:16Hannah Berner?

  You go, "Okay, that's, someone has an ego."

• 12:21Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, I feel like, oh yeah, this one lady was like, "Oh, I put hy- I will put hyaluronic acid." But then I realized that's filler, filler. They just don't say filler. They call it hyaluronic acid though.

• 12:32Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 12:32Hannah Berner?

  Which she tricked me. I was like, "Sure." Sure.

• 12:35Paige DeSorbo?

  No, you're wrong.

• 12:36Hannah Berner?

  Oh.

• 12:37Paige DeSorbo?

  No, hyaluronic acid is like in your skincare.

• 12:40Hannah Berner?

  Oh, they put something, hyaluronic something, actually. Chris, spell hyaluronic.

• 12:46Speaker 03

  H-I-L-O.

• 12:48Hannah Berner?

  Nope, you're already off.

• 12:49Paige DeSorbo?

  H-I, you freak.

• 12:50Hannah Berner?

  Christopher, Christopher, okay. Paige literally just looked at you like-

• 12:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Even I knew that.

• 12:55Hannah Berner?

  Um, speaking of body dysmorphia, I went to Victoria's Secret.

• 13:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh my god, yes.

• 13:01Hannah Berner?

  So by the way, Paige and I weren't gonna go. We had other plans.

• 13:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 13:06Hannah Berner?

  Then I pulled a fast one on her and I go, I casually on Monday was like, "I think I'm gonna go to Victoria's Secret." And then that's when you were like, "I don't, like you can't just do that."

• 13:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I was like, "No, I can't go."

• 13:16Hannah Berner?

  The way, I can't go anywhere anymore without people being like, "Where's Paige?"

• 13:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 13:21Hannah Berner?

  I met Jenna Lyons for the first time and she goes, "Where's Paige?" And I was like, "She's sleeping." And everyone, and she was like, "Oh my god," like all mad that you were sleeping. And I was like, "Let's have respect for rest."

• 13:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 13:32Hannah Berner?

  Let's bring back rest.

• 13:33Paige DeSorbo?

  I can't do everything.

• 13:35Hannah Berner?

  You can't do everything for anyone, everyone. Also, you just had facial construction surgery.

• 13:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Sorry, I was recovering from being gorgeous.

• 13:43Hannah Berner?

  You just had full surgery.

• 13:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 13:45Hannah Berner?

  So, um, I, you never know where they're gonna seat you.

• 13:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 13:49Hannah Berner?

  So funny, they sat me next to Matt Rogers and I'm like, "I love that they put the two comedians together."

• 13:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 13:54Hannah Berner?

  The sideline banter.

• 13:56Paige DeSorbo?

  No, he's phenomenal.

• 13:57Hannah Berner?

  Was incredible, because in the beginning, we were just like loving everything. And then by the end, we were acting, like when you watch the Olympics, at first, you're like, this is amazing. And then you're like, okay, let's get the knee up a little more.

• 14:09Paige DeSorbo?

  You know, when they mic up, like football players, when they're like practicing or something, or like on like game days.

• 14:15Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 14:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Petition to mic you up at all fashion events.

• 14:20Hannah Berner?

  Me?

• 14:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes, like every single fashion event, if we could have a recap, just from your, you being mic'd up while they're walking down.

• 14:29Hannah Berner?

  Do you want, you know, I love this show, because it was a fucking party. So like when everyone went down, like Matt and I were yelling like, and then I got obsessed with, you know, when you like watch basketball and you try to like say their names, they look at you? I was obsessed with when the girl would go down, I'd be like, yes, Angel, and like try to get her to look at me, and every now and then they would look at me.

• 14:48Paige DeSorbo?

  It's not about you.

• 14:52Hannah Berner?

  How dare you say that? How dare you say that?

• 14:54Paige DeSorbo?

  I loved your outfit.

• 14:56Hannah Berner?

  Oh, my god.

• 14:57Paige DeSorbo?

  You looked very chic.

• 14:58Hannah Berner?

  Can I give you the tea?

• 14:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 14:59Hannah Berner?

  So, someone jokingly said to me, you should go on eBay and get like a vintage Victoria's Secret lingerie.

• 15:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 15:10Hannah Berner?

  So I went online, I bought like three or four of them, they were all like forty bucks. That was fifty dollars, it's called a chemise? Chemise?

• 15:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 15:18Hannah Berner?

  A ca- chemise, chemise?

• 15:21Paige DeSorbo?

  A cami?

• 15:23Hannah Berner?

  But it was literally forty dollars, and I tried it on, and it was like giving, and then I wore my granny panties.

• 15:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Obviously, you had those.

• 15:31Hannah Berner?

  And then I got Lucio to shoot.

• 15:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Iconic.

• 15:35Hannah Berner?

  And he was like, we have to get the iconic page shot where like all the hands are in, and then Grace's hand was like on the bottom.

• 15:45Hannah Berner?

  But I do have to say, I saw Missy Elliott perform three songs, it was, that was like really insane.

• 15:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Your millennial heart, just like.

• 15:51Hannah Berner?

  And then, sitting like a couple of yards away was.

• 15:57Hannah Berner?

  La Roach.

• 15:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 15:58Hannah Berner?

  Sarah Jessica Parker.

• 15:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Mmm.

• 16:00Hannah Berner?

  Um, and Chloe Sevigny, who's kind of like a little bit of my fashion icon.

• 16:05Paige DeSorbo?

  I was gonna say, you like, I could see you vibing to her, like aesthetic.

• 16:10Hannah Berner?

  She's very cool.

• 16:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 16:13Hannah Berner?

  And like, but not like, like doesn't care if you think she's cool.

• 16:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Like her and the girl from Girls, um, that plays Jessa, like those two vibes are so your like, style vibes.

• 16:25Hannah Berner?

  But Jessa, by the way, I follow her on Instagram. She's amazing. She's the one that said, um, someone asked.

• 16:31Paige DeSorbo?

  About ourselves too much.

• 16:32Hannah Berner?

  About ourselves too much, iconic. She's like a little more like fairy.

• 16:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Mmm.

• 16:37Hannah Berner?

  Like she's like mystical.

• 16:39Paige DeSorbo?

  You guys also all have like similar hair.

• 16:41Hannah Berner?

  Why'd you say it like that? You went hair.

• 16:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Hair. Because it's always like, just like a messy, like.

• 16:47Hannah Berner?

  I didn't brush it today. I knew you were gonna say something.

• 16:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Like it's very boho. It's very boho chic. It's very Chloe. It's, it's type B.

• 16:57Hannah Berner?

  You're being defensive.

• 17:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Um, sorry, I'm botox now. I'm symmetrical. I'm perfect. I've always wanted this. Wait, also, I always have like a new beauty thing that I'm like.

• 17:10Hannah Berner?

  What are you doing?

• 17:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Like researching and like trying to do. Okay, so I've tried to do Invisalign for like, I'm not kidding, seven years.

• 17:16Hannah Berner?

  I just tried to start it again today. It hurts so bad.

• 17:19Paige DeSorbo?

  It hurts so bad, but also it's so hard to do when you have a job like this.

• 17:25Hannah Berner?

  During COVID, I was incredible.

• 17:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Amazing. But there are so many times where I like, I have to actually be able to speak and I have a lisp when I have it. Like I just like can't.

• 17:35Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 17:35Paige DeSorbo?

  So I was like looking up online. Well, did I tell you about the time when I was at a wedding and a girl came up to me and was like, what are you doing with your teeth?

• 17:47Hannah Berner?

  What?

• 17:48Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm at a wedding, okay?

• 17:50Hannah Berner?

  Why am I crying? What?

• 17:51Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm standing, I'm standing with one of my girlfriends, okay?

• 17:54Hannah Berner?

  Eating, eating, talking shit?

• 17:56Paige DeSorbo?

  No, yeah, I'm like vibing. I'm being a good guest. Like I'm.

• 18:00Hannah Berner?

  Sucking dick and accidentally hitting him with it? Like hello?

• 18:03Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm chopping it up, chatting with this girl. Another girl comes over. She's like to my right, okay? But she's like in my side profile. Like she's looking at me from the side.

• 18:13Hannah Berner?

  It was my mom.

• 18:15Paige DeSorbo?

  And I'm chatting to my girlfriend and then like the conversation like kind of ends and this girl goes, what's go- what are you doing with your teeth? That was it, that was the end of the sentence. And I just go, I'm like mid-bite, I'm like, I don't know what should I be doing?

• 18:30Hannah Berner?

  Wait, she meant like, they look good?

• 18:32Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know, no, I know. I mean, no. And so, and I do have like-

• 18:38Hannah Berner?

  Like, what are you wearing, what are you up to with your teeth, maybe?

• 18:43Paige DeSorbo?

  I feel like the phrase, what are you doing with? The with is, it's the with that's the deal.

• 18:48Hannah Berner?

  Also, you're not doing anything with it, this is how your teeth look.

• 18:51Paige DeSorbo?

  There's not much.

• 18:52Hannah Berner?

  What are you doing with it, it's not like you got bad veneers or anything.

• 18:55Paige DeSorbo?

  And I think she could see that I had like an Invisalign bracket. And I was like, oh, like I'm always trying to do Invisalign, but like, I can just never do it, like I can't stick to it, like I'll go four weeks and then I fall off, like blah blah blah, whatever. And she was like, well, you should get braces under your teeth. And I was like, what is that? And she was like, a lot of like people in entertainment do it on the inside.

• 19:19Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 19:21Paige DeSorbo?

  So I might do it on my top teeth.

• 19:23Hannah Berner?

  I might do that on my bottom teeth, the thing is, is-

• 19:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Did you just get that idea right?

• 19:28Hannah Berner?

  You go, oh, so first you do Botox without me, then you do the braces without me, you're just leaving me behind.

• 19:36Hannah Berner?

  Wait, no, it's cuz, first of all, I have cemetery teeth if I let them go.

• 19:39Paige DeSorbo?

  You have what?

• 19:40Hannah Berner?

  Like, it's, my bottom teeth will look like a cemetery, like gravestones, like they get really crossed up.

• 19:48Paige DeSorbo?

  I need a new topic, actually. Let's actually put a pin in this for until next week.

• 19:53Hannah Berner?

  You took it gross, I was talking tastefully about my teeth. No, but if you have it, like food gets stuck in it a lot. That's what they said. But you just have to get one of those, um, water washers, which you would love to have.

• 20:05Paige DeSorbo?

  I have a water pick.

• 20:07Hannah Berner?

  Water pick is so-

• 20:08Paige DeSorbo?

  I saw one TikTok and was like, yeah.

• 20:10Hannah Berner?

  So I know my mom water picks for like two hours every night. She's iconic. Yeah, she's like really good with her teeth, I know. Um, but, yeah, I tried to do Invisalign today and I was immediately in like a horrible mood, I'm like, why I'm in a bad mood, I'm like, oh yeah, cuz my teeth are fucking killing me.

• 20:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, I don't know, I had braces when I was younger, I don't know why they didn't give me like a permanent retainer.

• 20:28Hannah Berner?

  See, I love your teeth. At least you're not like, not to like compare, but like when my teeth go off, like I get buck tooth.

• 20:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, I just like don't like, like two of them. So I need to fix them.

• 20:42Hannah Berner?

  True.

• 20:42Paige DeSorbo?

  But I'm not, I would never get veneers.

• 20:44Hannah Berner?

  What are their names?

• 20:45Paige DeSorbo?

  I haven't named them. They don't deserve names.

• 20:48Hannah Berner?

  Oh, one last thing Jenna Lyons said about us. She was like, oh my god, you guys are like, you and Paige are like an iconic lesbian couple. And I was like, thank you.

• 20:56Paige DeSorbo?

  No, we are.

• 20:57Hannah Berner?

  I said, from the head of the lesbian community. Thank you.

• 21:03Paige DeSorbo?

  I recently have had an influx of lesbians being like, waiting for you to come out. And I'm like, okay.

• 21:08Hannah Berner?

  I may or may not have spread that rumor.

• 21:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Also, you saw Ciara Miller.

• 21:13Hannah Berner?

  Okay, so I get there, I'm sitting with Haley, whom I'm allowed to hang out with because she's blonde. And she, I was like, Ciara must be here.

• 21:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 21:20Hannah Berner?

  Either she's walking, which she should be, or she's here. But I didn't have any service. So as, when it was over, everyone's just like, okay, get out. So we're all walking. And of course, I walk right into her. I look her up and down. And she looks at me, she goes, don't do it. Don't do it. And I go, I started taking my phone out. She goes, don't say it. Don't say, she goes, fuck, don't say it. And I go, this is what Ciara wore in my running. And she's like, fuck you. Stop both.

• 21:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Right when I saw her, literally right when I saw a picture of what she was wearing, I immediately text Hannah and I go, Ciara's at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, find her. Because you're gonna love her outfit.

• 21:57Hannah Berner?

  The second she saw me, she goes, oh no. And then she's like, and don't talk about it on Giggly Squad.

• 22:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait. I also told her we weren't gonna talk about it on Giggly Squad.

• 22:05Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, I said I would never talk about it on Giggly Squad.

• 22:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Did you see her bag?

• 22:10Hannah Berner?

  I didn't know it was a bag. She kept like handing it to me and I thought it was just like a toy she brought. And then later on, I realized it was a bag.

• 22:16Paige DeSorbo?

  I saw it on the interweb. And I said, oh my god, Ciara wants that kind of cat. And so I got, I bought her that bag because I was just like,

• 22:25Hannah Berner?

  I thought you were gonna say, so I bought her a sphinx.

• 22:29Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't like the name of that cat.

• 22:31Hannah Berner?

  Sphinx?

• 22:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. Do you know that they're really oily?

• 22:35Hannah Berner?

  I have heard that.

• 22:36Paige DeSorbo?

  And like if you have one, then like their oil gets on their, your couch and stuff?

• 22:39Hannah Berner?

  Or that could be good for your skin.

• 22:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Disgusting. No, that's where I draw the line.

• 22:44Hannah Berner?

  But also, now that you've botox, do you even have to do skincare? You're kind of just like,

• 22:48Paige DeSorbo?

  I feel different.

• 22:48Hannah Berner?

  Glowing.

• 22:49Paige DeSorbo?

  You know what it feels like? Did you ever go tanning in high school, like to a tanning bed?

• 22:54Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 22:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, seriously?

• 22:59Hannah Berner?

  No, cuz my mom is like obsessed with me getting cancer.

• 23:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Never, not one time you've never been in a tanning bed.

• 23:04Hannah Berner?

  No, my mom doesn't want me to get cancer.

• 23:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh my, wait, oh my god Hannah. You've never walked into a tanning bed with a girl who literally is orange with her hair up like this being like, "Do you need goggles?"

• 23:18Hannah Berner?

  No. I did get a spray tan for the first time in college and it got all over like everything and then I didn't do it until summer house when you made me do it.

• 23:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, spray tanning, or tanning beds in high school were my religion, my life.

• 23:31Hannah Berner?

  How often did you go?

• 23:32Paige DeSorbo?

  We went every single day after school. Like, everyone went every single day after school. I literally got so tanned one year, I was like neon and my mom like started crying. She was like, "You're ruining yourself."

• 23:44Hannah Berner?

  So she knew?

• 23:44Paige DeSorbo?

  She knew. And I knew that about Botox. I was like, "This is gonna be just like a tanning bed circa 2008." Like, "I'm gonna fucking love it."

• 23:52Hannah Berner?

  Wait, maybe that's why people don't give me cocaine because they could tell that like I didn't do tanning beds? Maybe it's a correlation.

• 23:57Paige DeSorbo?

  There is a tanning bed cocaine pipeline.

• 24:02Hannah Berner?

  I should give you cocaine in the tanning bed.

• 24:04Paige DeSorbo?

  New reality TV series. Where's your tanning place, receptionist? Now.

• 24:10Hannah Berner?

  Actually, fuck Vanderpump Rules. I wanna see the drama that goes on in a tanning salon.

• 24:15Paige DeSorbo?

  A lot. And you could tell, you could cut it with a knife during prom season. You could literally cut it with a knife.

• 24:21Hannah Berner?

  Prom season, they were like, "Can I have a day?"

• 24:23Paige DeSorbo?

  They had a rule where it was like you could only go once a day. Like, you couldn't go...

• 24:28Hannah Berner?

  Why would you need to go more than once a day?

• 24:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, because sometimes you're short on time and like... So you could only go once a day. So we would go to different tanning places so that we could go more than once a day.

• 24:41Hannah Berner?

  Wait, can you please put like a health, um, warning on this?

• 24:45Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, I haven't gone to a tanning bed since literally 2010.

• 24:49Hannah Berner?

  Okay, this is my question and I know the answer.

• 24:52Paige DeSorbo?

  I do wish they would come back though. Like, the dopamine hit of a tanning bed, especially the dead of winter.

• 24:57Hannah Berner?

  How long would you be lying therefore?

• 24:59Paige DeSorbo?

  I would get up to like 12 minutes.

• 25:00Hannah Berner?

  Was it like hot?

• 25:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, it's like toasty.

• 25:03Hannah Berner?

  Okay, my question to you, even though I know the answer. Would you get a sticker, like, on your lower hip?

• 25:09Paige DeSorbo?

  I didn't. I always wanted to because they're so cool. But my mom would've lost her fucking mind.

• 25:18Hannah Berner?

  Oh, the cancer was fine, but not the sticker.

• 25:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. Yeah. We're still in vain households. Okay, let's not get it twisted.

• 25:28Hannah Berner?

  Actually, the one, the thing that really deterred me.

• 25:32Paige DeSorbo?

  I can't believe you've never even felt what it feels like.

• 25:34Hannah Berner?

  Have you seen Final Destination 3?

• 25:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes, but now Hannah Paige try new things, new episode. I have to take you tanning.

• 25:41Hannah Berner?

  No, like my mom would like, literally like, call the police if I was in a tanning bed.

• 25:47Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh my god.

• 25:48Hannah Berner?

  Wait, do you think less or more of me?

• 25:52Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm not sure.

• 25:55Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm not sure. You know what it is? You have zero rebellion in you at all.

• 26:00Hannah Berner?

  I have zero rebellion. It's so sad. Well, that's where I rebel now.

• 26:03Paige DeSorbo?

  No, that's nice.

• 26:04Hannah Berner?

  I rebel now with my outfits.

• 26:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, because like, there was a time in high school when my mom was like, "Don't go tanning." And I was like, "Okay."

• 26:11Hannah Berner?

  No, I've never...

• 26:12Paige DeSorbo?

  And I'd be like, "Stephanie, can you drive me tanning?"

• 26:13Hannah Berner?

  I mean, not to get deep into it, but yeah, no, I was Mrs. Goody Two Shoes. Because I wanted everyone to love me and choose me and pick me.

• 26:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Interesting.

• 26:20Hannah Berner?

  I always picked me, but like, for my parents.

• 26:24Paige DeSorbo?

  They were like, biologically programmed to pick you. This episode is sponsored by the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel and Afagato. Lately, I've been realizing that luxury doesn't have to mean some huge splurge. Sometimes it's just taking a few minutes to yourself during a busy day. I have one of these moments, oh, I don't know, every day around 2 o'clock. Whether that's making a pick-me-up coffee, or maybe I just need to scroll for a little bit on the couch. That's why I'm actually so excited about the new Hershey's Salted Caramel and Afagato Creme Bars available now. I absolutely love a treat-yourself moment in the middle of the day.

• 27:04Paige DeSorbo?

  And this is a classic Hershey's Milk Chocolate layered with a Salted Caramel or Afagato Creme filling. So it feels a little elevated while still being your favorite Hershey's chocolate. Pick up the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel or Afagato wherever you shop for snacks and choose happiness with every bite. Okay, autumn in New York is the season where we can finally start dressing again. Every single thing is an excuse to put on a look. Going to work, outfit. Leading a meeting, outfit. Getting drinks with your friends, obviously outfit. And as we all know, every great outfit starts from the feet up. That is why I'm currently obsessed with alleys from Sam Edelman. They're a ballet flat, but a little something extra for fall. A contrasting velvet cap toe, I have them in this gorgeous azure blue,

• 27:49Paige DeSorbo?

  which is like a dusty muted blue that somehow goes with everything, even Daphne's eyes. They're so cute and I'm already envisioning my next outfit. Straight leg jeans, an oversized blazer and a little shoulder bag. Very, I just threw this on when we all know I absolutely did not. And Hannah is loving hers too. She has the Michaela, which is the Sam Edelman's take on a Mary Jane. And this season it comes in the chicest leopard. So gorge, so easy and exactly the kind of shoe that makes an otherwise basic outfit look like you actually tried. And there's so much more coming from Sam Edelman this fall beyond these two. Like the new Teigan and Tallulah pumps, plus ready to wear handbags, fragrances, and even a new men's collection. So basically you can make sure both you and your man are looking good for date night

• 28:33Paige DeSorbo?

  because we're not doing all that getting dressed just to let him show up in a t-shirt. Head to samedelman.com and get 15% off with code giggly15. Lola blankets was definitely one of my number one purchases this past year. I have so many different blankets from them and Kitty loves their pet bed. Lola is just one of those products where the second someone touches it, they immediately understand the hype. Daphne is immediately making biscuits every time I pull out one of the blankets and I can always find her resting in her bed. The Lola pet bed is designed with the same signature ultra soft faux fur, but built specifically for your pet with an orthopedic foam base that supports their joints and helps them rest more comfortably.

• 29:17Paige DeSorbo?

  It's incredibly plush, holds its shape and helps regulate temperature so your pet stays cozy year round. The cover is removable and machine washable and it's completely shed free and made with durable double stitching, so it actually holds up over It's a win-win and your pet gets the coziest bed ever and you finally get your Lola blanket back. For a limited time, our listeners can get 40% off select Lola Blankets products with code GIGGLY at checkout. Just head to LolaBlankets.com and use code GIGGLY to get 40% off your order. After your purchase, they'll ask where you heard about them. Please support our show and let them know that the Giggly Squad sent you. Wrap yourself in luxury with Lola Blankets. If your anxiety, depression, or ADHD are more than just a rough patch,

• 30:03Paige DeSorbo?

  you might need more than just talk therapy or self-help tools. Talkiatry connects you with real psychiatric care so you can actually understand what's going on and get a treatment plan that works. Talkiatry is 100% online psychiatric practice that provides comprehensive evaluations, diagnoses, and ongoing medication management for conditions like ADHD, anxiety, depression, and much more. Unlike therapy-only platforms, Talkiatry is psychiatry. You're seeing a medical provider who can diagnose mental health conditions and prescribe medication when it's appropriate. You can meet with a licensed psychiatrist who takes the time to understand what's going on, builds a personalized treatment plan, and supports you over time with consistent, evidence-based care. And because you continue with the same provider, you're not starting over each time.

• 30:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Your treatment can evolve with you and you can actually make progress over time. Head to Talkiatry.com/Giggle to complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes. That's T-A-L-K-I-A-T-R-Y.com/Giggle to get matched in minutes. Talkiatry.com/Giggle.

• 31:09Hannah Berner?

  By the way, I was talking to Des about this because we were talking about bullying our younger siblings. It was so fucked up. You know how you joke where you'd look at your brother when I was really mad at him? The worst thing I would do was I'd be like, you know, you're adopted. And I was thinking about why it was so fucked up when I did it because my brother has blue eyes and blonde hair. So I'd be like, let's say what everyone's been thinking. Look in the fucking mirror, you're fucking adopted. And he goes, mom told me I'm not. And I go, that's, of course she would say that. That's what she would say.

• 31:39Paige DeSorbo?

  You has trauma.

• 31:40Hannah Berner?

  But you and Gary look like the same font.

• 31:43Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, there are no pictures of my mom pregnant with me and we still haven't gotten to the bottom of it. She was like, "I gained 50 pounds. I didn't want a photo."

• 31:51Hannah Berner?

  Which you're like, "I know who the dad is. Don't know who the mom is."

• 31:53Paige DeSorbo?

  There is something amiss. Still to this day, 32 years old, and if my brother says I'm adopted, I quick look at my mom just to see her initial reaction.

• 32:03Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm not convinced.

• 32:04Hannah Berner?

  Oh, I have to make an apology.

• 32:06Paige DeSorbo?

  The floor is yours.

• 32:07Hannah Berner?

  I did something jarring.

• 32:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 32:09Hannah Berner?

  And I didn't warn you.

• 32:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay. I know what it is. I know what it is. And you did this last time, right?

• 32:17Hannah Berner?

  Oh, I didn't know we're counting. I know we're keeping score.

• 32:19Paige DeSorbo?

  You change your profile picture, all of a sudden you're DMing me and I'm like throw, I'm like, "Who is this DMing me?" Because you get used to the photo staring back at you.

• 32:28Hannah Berner?

  So I'm easily, you know, socially peer pressured.

• 32:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 32:33Hannah Berner?

  So I posted those new photos and people liked them and everyone's like, "Change your profile picture." So I changed it and immediately I didn't like it. I thought it was like too sexy for me. Because like, sometimes when I'm so sexy, I'm like, "People can't handle this. It's too much sex."

• 32:45Paige DeSorbo?

  No, your profile picture is very reflective of like what you're going through at that time and how you feel about yourself.

• 32:54Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, and I don't want people to go to my page and immediately see sex kitten, even though like, "Am I a sex kitten?" Yes. But do I always want to be her? No. Is it hard being a sex kitten? So much.

• 33:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 33:08Paige DeSorbo?

  You being 20, 25.

• 33:09Hannah Berner?

  I can't help that hard.

• 33:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Your 20, 25 sex symbol of the year.

• 33:13Hannah Berner?

  I just say, girls who are 34 have the highest sex drive. Like, where?

• 33:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, do they?

• 33:17Hannah Berner?

  Oh my god, you're 30s? It's crazy. You start like humping tables again.

• 33:22Hannah Berner?

  Look at you.

• 33:25Hannah Berner?

  You're only 32. Just wait. It's gonna hit.

• 33:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, I turn 33 like tomorrow.

• 33:31Hannah Berner?

  I know, I'm ready.

• 33:32Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm ready.

• 33:33Hannah Berner?

  I have your gift. Thirty, babe, thirty-three and thirty-two, same age.

• 33:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 33:36Hannah Berner?

  Thirty-four. You're forty.

• 33:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 33:38Hannah Berner?

  Enjoy.

• 33:39Paige DeSorbo?

  That's crazy. Thirty-four, I'm thirty-five. I'm not forty yet, but thirty-five, I'm forty.

• 33:43Hannah Berner?

  Thirty-five is forty, so.

• 33:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, so I have one year. Give me a break.

• 33:47Hannah Berner?

  No, turning thirty-three is great, great, because you're like, I'm still thirty.

• 33:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I don't care about turning thirty-three.

• 33:51Hannah Berner?

  The following year is, I'm gonna have to put you in like a psych ward.

• 33:56Paige DeSorbo?

  The thing, we got the botox now.

• 33:58Hannah Berner?

  You guys, I'm thirty-four, Paige is thirty-two right now, I'm like, you little baby.

• 34:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 34:02Hannah Berner?

  You little tiny baby.

• 34:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Good, keep treating me like that.

• 34:04Hannah Berner?

  You are, you're my little young baby, um, with my baby botox.

• 34:08Paige DeSorbo?

  You know what I did this week?

• 34:10Hannah Berner?

  What'd you do?

• 34:12Paige DeSorbo?

  You know when you have like,

• 34:14Hannah Berner?

  Yes.

• 34:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Actually, I was gonna say, no, you definitely don't.

• 34:22Paige DeSorbo?

  You know when you have projects around your house that like, you wanna get done?

• 34:28Paige DeSorbo?

  And you don't, I know that you don't.

• 34:31Hannah Berner?

  I'm like, when my mom visits, I'm gonna,

• 34:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, okay, exactly my point. So I have like, insane closet space in my apartment, I really have like, great closets. But I have, everything's like, split up into my closet, so like, not all my stuff is in like, one closet, like a frickin' normal person.

• 34:49Hannah Berner?

  Mm-hmm.

• 34:50Paige DeSorbo?

  So I have like, six of them. Okay, and I'm not complaining.

• 34:54Hannah Berner?

  Wait, can I just,

• 34:55Paige DeSorbo?

  And I'm not bragging.

• 34:55Hannah Berner?

  Can I call you out? One of these could have been a bedroom for like, her family when she visited.

• 35:00Paige DeSorbo?

  That's crazy.

• 35:01Hannah Berner?

  She was like, you could have had a pull-out couch.

• 35:05Paige DeSorbo?

  That's crazy. I don't want people staying. I don't want you coming and staying with me for the weekend.

• 35:10Hannah Berner?

  That's smart of you, that's smart.

• 35:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Get a hotel, like a normal person.

• 35:14Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 35:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Mom and dad.

• 35:15Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. You were saying you have a project and you have six closets.

• 35:18Paige DeSorbo?

  So this week, I was like, guys?

• 35:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Alright. I was like, guys, I can't get glam. I literally was like, I'm not glamming this week, this week at all. I'm not glamming. I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying in my apartment. That's the only thing I'm doing Monday through Friday.

• 35:38Hannah Berner?

  You did Amazon.

• 35:39Paige DeSorbo?

  I know.

• 35:40Hannah Berner?

  Josephine told me.

• 35:41Paige DeSorbo?

  I know.

• 35:41Hannah Berner?

  And I was like, this poor girl.

• 35:43Paige DeSorbo?

  That was the only time I had to leave my apartment. So I did all my Zooms and all my calls from that. I literally had a week where it's like, you know, when you're just like, oh, when I have time, I'll do that. I dedicated a week to all of those projects. And it was so invigorating and amazing. And my apartment looks fake. It's in tip-top shape.

• 36:05Hannah Berner?

  I do have to say, like, you went on Fallon, like, the previous week. And, like, there's something weird to be said that, like, the joy of going on Fallon is actually equivalent to the joy of, like, finishing a project in your house. And I don't mean to be like, like Fallon is not incredible, but there is.

• 36:22Paige DeSorbo?

  It's what brings you joy in your heart.

• 36:23Hannah Berner?

  It's what brings you joy. And I've done Fallon, and I've never completed a project in my house. And like, what I, what I would give to, like, finish.

• 36:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I installed shelves. I took my toolbox out.

• 36:35Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I knew you did, because I sent you that meme of that cat. Did you see?

• 36:39Paige DeSorbo?

  You give me an edible, and I'll come up with crazy organizational projects.

• 36:43Hannah Berner?

  So this is my brain right now. Uh, you guys. So I haven't received my driver's license yet.

• 36:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, in the mail?

• 36:50Hannah Berner?

  In the mail, because I don't know what my address is. I've moved so many times.

• 36:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 36:54Hannah Berner?

  Gun to my head, couldn't tell you where it is. But then, like, you go online, and my DMV, I can't get it to work.

• 37:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 37:01Hannah Berner?

  So then Dez was like.

• 37:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Did it stress you out when I said you have to register, or you have to vote?

• 37:07Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. Well, I, I think I'm actually, I'm set up to vote in Long Island.

• 37:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh.

• 37:15Hannah Berner?

  Which is my situation, I believe, but I have to double check. Um, the DMV, Dez was like, send them an email. And I was like, I don't think.

• 37:22Paige DeSorbo?

  The DMV doesn't.

• 37:22Hannah Berner?

  I don't think they, but anyway, I sent them an email and they being like, hi, my name's Hannah.

• 37:29Hannah Berner?

  Hope your week is going well.

• 37:32Paige DeSorbo?

  They're like, the DMV has a fuck you button, like for sure.

• 37:35Hannah Berner?

  So they respond with like a generic email being like, hey, we don't know what you're talking about. Can you call this number? Which I took as a, I'm never gonna get my license. So Dez yesterday was like, did you call the DMV? And I was like, I emailed them and.

• 37:47Paige DeSorbo?

  You're like, no, I'm a millennial. I didn't call the DMV.

• 37:51Hannah Berner?

  He goes, well, what'd they say? And he said, they gave me a number, but like, obviously I'm not gonna do that. And he goes, you have to call them. And I'm like, no. So I have to call them. I'd actually rather.

• 37:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Has this been stressing you out for days?

• 38:02Hannah Berner?

  Days. This is month two. This is two months in. I passed my test in August.

• 38:07Paige DeSorbo?

  That you haven't called?

• 38:09Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. So I'd actually rather physically go into the DMV than call them. Cause I don't think they're gonna, there's something about customer service where whenever I have to explain what's wrong, they always respond to me like they've never heard it in the world. And like, I'm, I'm insane.

• 38:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 38:25Hannah Berner?

  Like, you know, you'll say something like so basic, you'll be like, hey, I have to set up a new appointment. And they're like.

• 38:29Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't do customer service.

• 38:31Hannah Berner?

  So I don't know what to do. I just.

• 38:33Paige DeSorbo?

  I just keep that. I don't even return. I'm like, I can't.

• 38:36Hannah Berner?

  I think I just like, I'm not gonna have a driver's license.

• 38:41Paige DeSorbo?

  I think you should call.

• 38:42Hannah Berner?

  If there's any, again, if there's that good gigglers at the DMV, I need your help. Also, one other note, I really thought in 2025, there'd be more things going on with 3D printers.

• 38:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Hannah? Yes. I've never been more lying down on something. I just thought about this.

• 39:02Hannah Berner?

  We were gonna be building houses by now. The way I thought.

• 39:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you remember when all the 3D printer talk was happening a couple of years ago? There was a girl that came out with getting your nails done through a 3D printer? Where is she?

• 39:12Hannah Berner?

  Where is she? Are they holding her hostage?

• 39:14Paige DeSorbo?

  It was like, you put your hand in a machine and it just went and did it like quickly.

• 39:18Hannah Berner?

  Big nail group companies were like, oh, hell no.

• 39:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Nelson is, no. What's going on with 3D printing?

• 39:25Hannah Berner?

  When I first heard of 3D printing, I said, oh.

• 39:27Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought they were gonna solve like so many medical things.

• 39:30Hannah Berner?

  No, for sure. I recently heard of something, there's certain, oh, someone told me there's a conspiracy theory that.

• 39:38Hannah Berner?

  This is so niche and not important.

• 39:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 39:40Hannah Berner?

  But it's for the golfers out there.

• 39:41Paige DeSorbo?

  It's perfect for the podcast.

• 39:42Hannah Berner?

  Okay, so if you ever play golf, all you do is like lose your golf ball all the time. And I realized like it's definitely, there should be an app to help you find your golf ball. Like, men spend hours just like in the woods trying to find their golf balls. Then I realized they don't want to have an app for people to find golf balls because they want people to keep buying golf balls.

• 40:03Hannah Berner?

  And that's on, period.

• 40:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Big golf ball.

• 40:06Hannah Berner?

  Big golf.

• 40:08Paige DeSorbo?

  A real motherfucker.

• 40:10Hannah Berner?

  So now.

• 40:11Paige DeSorbo?

  They could also just change the color of the golf balls.

• 40:15Hannah Berner?

  Yes, but it's still hard to see it like if it gets in the, in the woods. Men are out here just like searching for golf balls for hours, but then again, maybe the wives. Maybe the wives are like, good, I don't want them to find the golf ball. Let them just like search for the golf ball. But then it's funny because when women, men can't find anything ever.

• 40:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 40:32Hannah Berner?

  So like, maybe it's just the men.

• 40:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 40:34Hannah Berner?

  Because I find my golf balls.

• 40:36Paige DeSorbo?

  When you're golfing, like, and you hit it into like the woods. Are you actually hitting it from the woods back?

• 40:45Hannah Berner?

  Sometimes.

• 40:46Paige DeSorbo?

  You're not picking it up and carrying it?

• 40:48Hannah Berner?

  No, that's, that's cheating.

• 40:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Golf sounds stupid. I would be cheating all the time.

• 40:53Hannah Berner?

  So when you're in the woods, like, sometimes if you hit it wrong, it can hit the tree and come back and like kill you.

• 41:01Hannah Berner?

  No, like golf is a serious sport. People can talk about it. But like, like it's, my brother almost.

• 41:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Has anyone ever died playing professional golf?

• 41:08Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 41:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Really?

• 41:10Hannah Berner?

  My brother almost decapitated me once.

• 41:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Like whilst on TV, like playing?

• 41:14Hannah Berner?

  Someone DM me, they were like, I know you make fun of Paige not being able to spell, but every now and then she drops a word that everyone's like, like whilst? That was crazy.

• 41:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Thank you.

• 41:21Hannah Berner?

  Um, people have died. People definitely have gotten concussions. I mean, in professional golf.

• 41:25Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't think anyone, any professional golfers have died while playing golf.

• 41:31Hannah Berner?

  I think people who are watching them play have died because they got hit with the ball.

• 41:39Hannah Berner?

  Like, people be dying.

• 41:44Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, it's inevitable. People are going to die, but.

• 41:47Hannah Berner?

  If you wanted to kill someone, go and golf.

• 41:56Hannah Berner?

  I can't tell Chris's-

• 41:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Like if you were a hitman, like that's how you would set it up so it can look like an accident. A perfect murder is really going golfing.

• 42:05Hannah Berner?

  Oh, could you, could you step back a little more? They're perfect.

• 42:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, can you look up if anyone's died?

• 42:11Speaker 03

  I'm, I am looking it up right now. It's, it doesn't look like anybody's died on the field.

• 42:17Hannah Berner?

  Okay, look, I had a really good idea with 3D printers and then it wasn't.

• 42:22Paige DeSorbo?

  And that's friendship. You have to, like, sometimes you're gonna have really good ideas.

• 42:27Hannah Berner?

  Really high highs and really low lows.

• 42:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Really low lows. And you have to remember that that's the same person you love.

• 42:32Hannah Berner?

  Wait, it's literally like, um, quicksand, 3D printers. I thought it was gonna be more prevalent in our society.

• 42:38Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought it was gonna, yeah. I, I did not see AI coming, okay? The really human for a loop.

• 42:44Hannah Berner?

  I mean, I did. Have you seen iRobot like 15 years ago?

• 42:46Paige DeSorbo?

  I just thought that like we'd have more, it'd be more accessible to get like 3D printed things.

• 42:52Hannah Berner?

  I just think that people don't-

• 42:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Like I thought I'd own a 3D printer by now.

• 42:57Hannah Berner?

  No, for sure. But wait, I know what happened. Printers don't work.

• 43:02Hannah Berner?

  No one could figure out, first, before you have a 3D printer, let's get a normal printer to work.

• 43:06Paige DeSorbo?

  It was the Bluetooth.

• 43:08Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, printers, printers used to work until you guys got all fancy with it. I swear to God, does and I got a printer. It's never worked. We've had it for like six months. It's never worked.

• 43:19Paige DeSorbo?

  I've seen that printer.

• 43:20Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, it's never worked.

• 43:20Paige DeSorbo?

  You know what's crazy? I use my printer all the time.

• 43:23Hannah Berner?

  And it works?

• 43:26Hannah Berner?

  You run out of ink? Ever? Do you know how to replace the ink cartridge?

• 43:29Paige DeSorbo?

  I do.

• 43:30Hannah Berner?

  Also the, hmm, no, I can't. That's like the DMV.

• 43:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Not on a Sunday.

• 43:36Hannah Berner?

  You guys, it's a Sunday by the way. Oh my God, do you know what would be such a good movie? Botox serial killer. How a woman is killing people, giving them botox.

• 43:47Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I think about that all the time. When I get like an IV.

• 43:51Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, you think everyone with IVs trying to murder you.

• 43:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Speaking of trying to murder me.

• 43:57Paige DeSorbo?

  I got into an Uber the other day and I, you ever like, you're just so parched, like you're so fucking thirsty.

• 44:03Hannah Berner?

  Every second of the day.

• 44:04Paige DeSorbo?

  You're just like, I'll die if I don't have a sip of water.

• 44:07Hannah Berner?

  Literally me every second.

• 44:08Paige DeSorbo?

  And I get into this Uber and in the cup holder, two freshly ice cold Aquapana. I mean, I was in an SUV, it was nice. It looked so good. But in my head, I can never drink a drink from an Uber, take a piece of gum or a mint, because you've poisoned it.

• 44:30Hannah Berner?

  Wait, so you're like torching yourself staring at the water?

• 44:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Staring at it.

• 44:33Hannah Berner?

  Wait, but do you ever see like, okay, if it's not opened?

• 44:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Don't trust it.

• 44:37Hannah Berner?

  But there's a seal for a reason. You think they murdered, they, the people, hmm.

• 44:42Paige DeSorbo?

  I think they unsealed it, put in the poison, sealed it back up. It's not that hard to reseal things.

• 44:48Hannah Berner?

  True, if you have a resealer at home.

• 44:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I'm sure you can get one on Amazon. I'm sure you can 3D print a resealer.

• 44:56Hannah Berner?

  Wait, that's crazy.

• 44:57Paige DeSorbo?

  And I feel bad because some Uber drivers, you're like, you can tell that they like, do, they're like, I'm gonna go and get all of this stuff in the back of my car, I'm gonna have this like, thing playing, there's lights, and I'm just like, I love the effort, but I personally can never drink or eat something from an Uber.

• 45:12Hannah Berner?

  So the guy straight up will be like, if you need water, it's right here, and you go, not gonna get me today, sir. I'm not that easy.

• 45:18Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, yeah, good try. Maybe the next girl will fall for that.

• 45:23Hannah Berner?

  See, I'm the kind of person where like, at a party, if I'm really thirsty, and I see there's water, even if it's like been drinking from, I'm drinking it.

• 45:29Paige DeSorbo?

  I have my mom in my head saying, don't you dare pick that up.

• 45:34Hannah Berner?

  Also, I'm like, no one's roofing a water.

• 45:36Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know. I mean, being roofied in an Uber is kind of the perfect crime.

• 45:43Hannah Berner?

  True.

• 45:44Paige DeSorbo?

  If you think about it, and someone drinks it, and they pass out in the Uber. There you go.

• 45:49Hannah Berner?

  If you were a waitress at a restaurant and someone like didn't finish their fries and you were really hungry, would you ever eat the fries? Would you bring it back? Okay. Okay, so you're not like psycho?

• 45:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Like if I worked there, I was the waitress and I'm like in the kitchen and I like have the plate? Yeah, I'm not like a freak. Obviously, I would like have the fries.

• 46:05Hannah Berner?

  Even though they're like dirty little hands is like all over it. I actually caused a little bit of a stir yesterday.

• 46:12Hannah Berner?

  Wait, why was I giving the Teen Vogue party?

• 46:18Paige DeSorbo?

  Because I also just know it's gonna be like the most non-stirring thing.

• 46:25Hannah Berner?

  So sad. Um, my mom was singing jazz, as she does. And we're at this restaurant. It was me and my dad at the bar, chilling.

• 46:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 46:33Hannah Berner?

  And then suddenly this guy's like, "Someone lost jewelry. Someone lost jewelry." And he comes up to me and he's holding this like gem. It looks like a big, big diamond.

• 46:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 46:45Hannah Berner?

  And he goes-

• 46:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Like ring?

• 46:46Hannah Berner?

  It was just like a gem.

• 46:47Paige DeSorbo?

  Just a stone.

• 46:48Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, and he's like, "Is this yours?" And I was like, "No, sir, it's not mine." And he goes, "It was right under you." And I was like, "Not mine, thank you so much."

• 46:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Stirring. Not my gemstone.

• 46:58Hannah Berner?

  I'm a paradox. It's not me. No, it's maybe... I'm like, "Sir, please leave me alone," and it was my dad. And he goes, "Are you sure?" And I look and I realize I had just threw on some Crocs and they had all these gibbets. One of the gibbets was like, these like gem gibbets. And I go, "Oh, that's my gibbet."

• 47:19Hannah Berner?

  And the guy goes, "What?" And I go, "Thank you." And I couldn't put it back. It's hard to put it. How did the gibbet come off? Who knows? So anyway, my Crocs caused quite a stir at the bar yesterday, but it looked like it was like-

• 47:32Paige DeSorbo?

  I have another reason why the Crocs caused quite a stir at the bar yesterday.

• 47:37Hannah Berner?

  They were-

• 47:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Also, how'd they come up with the name gibbet?

• 47:41Hannah Berner?

  I didn't know what a gibbet was. I said, "Excuse you." And then they said, "It's, it's just like-"

• 47:45Paige DeSorbo?

  They really popped off with the gibbets.

• 47:47Hannah Berner?

  They really popped off with their collaborations and it's crazy because I haven't gotten an email.

• 47:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you think I'm keeping us from getting a Croc and Giggly Squad collab?

• 47:56Hannah Berner?

  You know, I didn't think about that.

• 47:57Paige DeSorbo?

  If anything, they have built-in hilarious marketing because it could just be like a commercial about how you've gotten me to wear Crocs and I've been like against it.

• 48:03Hannah Berner?

  I think they've pitched it and you said no.

• 48:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh.

• 48:07Hannah Berner?

  I feel like, what if Hannah convinced Paige and you go-

• 48:12Hannah Berner?

  Do you know what I want to pitch Crocs?

• 48:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 48:15Hannah Berner?

  A croc with a pointed toe.

• 48:20Paige DeSorbo?

  That sounds so fucking ugly. I can't even. But their whole thing, I think, though, is like...

• 48:26Hannah Berner?

  Having wide feet.

• 48:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, is that...?

• 48:28Hannah Berner?

  I don't know. But it's shaped as your foot is, which is, like, it goes out and all these shoes that make your feet turn in. It's like, when they...

• 48:39Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't, I don't align with you on this.

• 48:42Hannah Berner?

  It's the patriarchy. I'm literally almost done with my refresher. I'm still on my mango pineapple refresher BS. What are you drinking?

• 48:49Paige DeSorbo?

  I always get...

• 48:50Hannah Berner?

  That's blueberry?

• 48:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm, with lemonade.

• 48:52Hannah Berner?

  Very good shade today. It kind of matches your nails.

• 48:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes, it does.

• 48:57Hannah Berner?

  Are we doing red now? Is it time?

• 48:59Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I'm almost done with red. Jacqueline comes next week. These puppies are gone. And we'll see them next year. Maybe one time in the spring.

• 49:05Hannah Berner?

  I got French, so it means I could have a French for like, two years. It's just, no one can tell. It just grows out. I'm looking at my notes. I did say I need to see T-Pain live. Is that coming across your TikTok at all?

• 49:19Paige DeSorbo?

  That's not coming across my notes.

• 49:21Hannah Berner?

  My TikTok is all T-Pain. He's like, dancing like, amazing. I just feel like his...

• 49:24Paige DeSorbo?

  The point is that he's low-key like, the best singer.

• 49:26Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, I think his concerts are like, insane. Chris is nodding. Are you a big T-Pain guy?

• 49:29Speaker 03

  I've seen, I've seen some of the T-Pain concerts. It's good stuff.

• 49:32Hannah Berner?

  Chris and I actually have the same algorithm.

• 49:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I feel like you guys, you have a very similar algor... You have a 26-year-old man's algorithm. 100%. That makes actually so much sense.

• 49:43Hannah Berner?

  Dez was laughing.

• 49:43Paige DeSorbo?

  The other day, my algorithm got almost like, too girly. Like, I was like, how many skincare routines can I fucking watch?

• 49:51Hannah Berner?

  Well, you have been looking at my messages.

• 49:52Paige DeSorbo?

  And so then I went and looked at your messages and got my algorithm back to like, a lovely place. And I was like, hello, give me a couple humor jokes.

• 50:01Hannah Berner?

  Whenever Dez looks at my TikTok, he goes, "Why do you have so many more tits than me on your TikTok?" And I'm like, "Sorry, it's just beautiful women." Like, being funny and cool. And his is like, about hip mobility. But that's just his age. That's just his age showing.

• 50:17Paige DeSorbo?

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• 51:02Paige DeSorbo?

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• 51:47Paige DeSorbo?

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• 52:30Paige DeSorbo?

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• 53:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Colgate's unique formulation of hydrogen peroxide, which is the ingredient dentists use to whiten teeth. Colgate Optic White Pro Series Toothpaste works at the molecular level to gently dissolve stains deep within the enamel where your brush can't reach. I have to drink my daily coffee every morning. I literally go to bed thinking about it. So, cutting out coffee is just not an option for me when it comes to whitening my teeth. And a good smile is kind of like a great outfit. You don't always know why someone looks put together, you just know that they do. I love that Colgate Optic White Pro Series Toothpaste works on those everyday stains while still being enamel-safe for daily use. It's proof that daily routine can be remarkable. That's the science of wow. Colgate Optic White.

• 54:01Hannah Berner?

  Gigglers, the holidays are coming and Arm & Hammer Hardball Cat Litter and I are making sure all my fellow cat parents are guest-ready. You guys know I'm obsessed with cats, I'm a cat missionary and make sure everyone in my life has a cat and I'm doing really well at it. I foster and I'm constantly trying to help cats find homes. And around the holidays, I basically want everyone I know to fall in love with a cat and take one home. But, the holidays, you guys are hosting, you have your cat, and you have such a to-do list, you know? Hiding things in closets, pretending you're clean, pulling out the snacks. One thing I do not need to add to that list is worrying about cat smell. Arm & Hammer Hardball Cat Litter keeps odors under control and forms compact clumps that make cleanup easy, so that part is already handled in the background.

• 54:44Hannah Berner?

  So then, I can focus on my guests and maybe convince one of them they need a cat. For all my fellow cat parents, be guest-ready with Arm & Hammer Hardball Cat Litter. Find it now at Walmart or Amazon.

• 54:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Your best friend wore a dress that I wore.

• 55:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Hailey Bieber wore this black dress that I wore to Las Culturistas. So we're basically sisters.

• 55:11Hannah Berner?

  Where'd she wear it?

• 55:12Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know. No, she wore it to the Kylie Jenner something.

• 55:17Hannah Berner?

  Did she wear the hat?

• 55:19Paige DeSorbo?

  No, she didn't. Well, there was a theme for Las Culturistas that nobody did. So that's why I was wearing the hat. And it's like the whole thing, I've even forgotten about it. But anyway, I digress.

• 55:29Hannah Berner?

  I saw the Met America.

• 55:34Paige DeSorbo?

  The gala?

• 55:35Hannah Berner?

  Gala.

• 55:35Paige DeSorbo?

  Academy?

• 55:36Hannah Berner?

  Academy.

• 55:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Of the Americas?

• 55:38Hannah Berner?

  Of America Society Museum?

• 55:42Hannah Berner?

  Geographic, National Geographic.

• 55:46Hannah Berner?

  That's what it was.

• 55:47Paige DeSorbo?

  When all these celebrities go to like one thing and you're like, oh, they've all been going for years. You're like, I've never heard of this.

• 55:54Hannah Berner?

  Well, they were saying it's like the Met Gala of the West Coast. And I was like, okay, rebrand.

• 55:57Paige DeSorbo?

  That is exactly the name of it, though.

• 55:58Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, yeah, that's it. We can't get it again.

• 56:00Paige DeSorbo?

  The charity of the gala, of the museums.

• 56:02Hannah Berner?

  Were there any outfits that you were like into or the vibes? What are you thinking about the state of fashion?

• 56:10Paige DeSorbo?

  As someone who's just cleaned her closet.

• 56:15Hannah Berner?

  So you're in a refreshed palette right now.

• 56:17Paige DeSorbo?

  People were really hating on Kim Kardashian. Did you see she had like that covered face?

• 56:22Hannah Berner?

  First of all, Kim Kardashian is so cunt because, one, we all knew it was her. Do you know how good your branding has to be to show up without your face? And people go, that's Kim K.

• 56:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes, yes.

• 56:31Hannah Berner?

  She's won. And then she was the most.

• 56:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Honestly, when we did Vanity Fair, I didn't even see Kim K walk in. And I felt her presence. I was like, Kim Kardashian is here.

• 56:40Hannah Berner?

  That was cunt with a K. And then she.

• 56:42Paige DeSorbo?

  The Scaparelli.

• 56:43Hannah Berner?

  Everyone's talking, but everyone was talking about Kim.

• 56:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 56:46Hannah Berner?

  And then the jewels were insane. Also, like, I wonder, did she have full glam under? Or do you think?

• 56:51Paige DeSorbo?

  She said yes.

• 56:52Hannah Berner?

  She did.

• 56:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Because she was taking, it was a dinner. So she knew she was like taking that off at some point.

• 56:56Hannah Berner?

  Gonna take it off, okay. What'd you say about Scaparelli?

• 56:59Paige DeSorbo?

  She wore that, she wore Scaparelli dress to her premiere of that show, which I can't wait for that to come out.

• 57:05Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, really, really good.

• 57:06Paige DeSorbo?

  What is that, what is it? Something all something, something.

• 57:09Hannah Berner?

  Corsets are back.

• 57:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 57:13Hannah Berner?

  I feel like we're reclaiming them.

• 57:18Paige DeSorbo?

  From the Victorians.

• 57:24Hannah Berner?

  I mean, like, sitting in a

• 57:28Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I actually, do you remember that lime green corset that you had that you literally wore everywhere?

• 57:35Hannah Berner?

  Wait, why do I not remember?

• 57:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Are you kidding? You had a lime green corset?

• 57:39Hannah Berner?

  You're kidding? It ruined my life and you can't remember it?

• 57:42Paige DeSorbo?

  You wore this lime green corset from Amazon everywhere. You wore it with green pants, you wore it with silver pants, you wore it with jeans. I've seen that. So you bringing up corsets right now is actually really triggering.

• 57:53Hannah Berner?

  That era was crazy.

• 57:55Paige DeSorbo?

  When windbreaker pants were trending, I was scared for my life because I was like, Hannah's thrown out all of her pants, she only windbreaks. She's a windbreaker now. Like, she only breaks wind. Like, there's nothing else she's doing but going outside and breaking wind.

• 58:11Hannah Berner?

  It's a great pan for farts. I posted a TikTok, which I've been, I'm getting back on my TikTok era. Because people were making fun of millennials for putting LOL

• 58:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 58:22Hannah Berner?

  at the end of sentences. And I realized I do beginning and end. Like, I do a LOL sandwich.

• 58:29Paige DeSorbo?

  You have anxiety.

• 58:30Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. End the video. Let me just redo my TikTok video. But I was like, it's like an emotional, um...

• 58:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Blanket.

• 58:38Hannah Berner?

  Emotional blanket.

• 58:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Security blanket.

• 58:41Hannah Berner?

  Security blanket. But that, if you're making fun of someone for putting LOL before or after, like, you didn't live through 9/11.

• 58:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Damn. And Gen Z can't say anything about it because they weren't even alive.

• 58:52Hannah Berner?

  No, like, they don't have any, they like, are reading about it.

• 58:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you want to know what I think it is? I think millennials are such like people pleasers in general, where Gen Z isn't.

• 59:03Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, Gen Z will just stare at you, like, thinking about something else, even though you ask them like a very straightforward question.

• 59:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 59:09Hannah Berner?

  Where like, if I don't say LOL at the beginning of my text, that means I did not acknowledge your presence. I didn't give you credit.

• 59:16Paige DeSorbo?

  I think our generation of parents were so, not like disregarded as children, but they had such freedom as children where it was like, "Yeah, be home before sex." Like, they could do whatever the fuck they wanted. So that like them raising us, they're like, "And here's everything you'll ever need." And then we, are we the ones having Gen Z? No.

• 59:37Hannah Berner?

  I think we, it's because we invented LOL. Like, don't tell me I can't use LOL. We invented LOL. T9.

• 59:44Paige DeSorbo?

  I actually had some Gen Z college girls DM me and say, "We are playing Flip Cup." And I said, "Thank you for doing the research that matters."

• 59:50Hannah Berner?

  Thank you for doing the research that matters. I got a couple of those too, which is really good. I think it was more for the bit. So we don't need those details, actually. It was funnier to think that, like, they didn't.

• 59:59Paige DeSorbo?

  I love thinking that.

• 1:00:00Hannah Berner?

  But there are gonna be some-

• 1:00:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Everyone's studying at college.

• 1:00:03Hannah Berner?

  But I do think some games do get lost.

• 1:00:05Paige DeSorbo?

  In translation, yeah. And it's sad.

• 1:00:08Hannah Berner?

  I... I have some shows that I watch with my husband.

• 1:00:13Paige DeSorbo?

  I can't believe you just brought him up on the pod.

• 1:00:16Hannah Berner?

  No. Should we take it out?

• 1:00:18Paige DeSorbo?

  What shows? Wait, did you watch that Netflix documentary, um...

• 1:00:23Paige DeSorbo?

  About the woman in Florida that gets shot through the door?

• 1:00:28Hannah Berner?

  I... That's on my list. Well, it's because Dez was home, and he goes-

• 1:00:32Paige DeSorbo?

  That's so good you have to watch.

• 1:00:32Hannah Berner?

  He says verbatim, "Watch that documentary stuff when I'm not here." So I watched Task with him. That everyone's into.

• 1:00:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Everyone's talking about it.

• 1:00:43Hannah Berner?

  No, they love Task because the guys are hot in it, and they say, they have their, like, Philly acc- Philadelphia accents. They say, "Water."

• 1:00:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Are those particularly sought out, sought-after accents?

• 1:00:54Hannah Berner?

  I wouldn't say they're sought-after, but like, um, "The house. Get the house. Some water in the house." "The home. Are you coming home?"

• 1:01:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Is that Philly? I would've said that's like Minnesota.

• 1:01:07Hannah Berner?

  It's Philly. Minnesota's more like, "Oh, yeah."

• 1:01:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. Wait, I didn't realize that, like, Pennsylvania, like, they really have an accent.

• 1:01:15Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, and the, it's, and it's cool, but anyway, it's-

• 1:01:18Paige DeSorbo?

  The further you go down, the scarier it gets.

• 1:01:21Hannah Berner?

  That's what I tell my husband.

• 1:01:27Hannah Berner?

  Speaking of, speaking of, have you seen, as two Italian girls, have you seen the bush thong? Uh, it's, why are people, like-

• 1:01:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:36Hannah Berner?

  On line being like, "Why are you doing the bush thong? Obviously, it's a bit."

• 1:01:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, obviously, it's like, uh, um-

• 1:01:43Hannah Berner?

  It's just to get attention.

• 1:01:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Like a novelty thing.

• 1:01:46Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, it's like funny, too, and people are like, trying to like, get to the bottom of it.

• 1:01:50Paige DeSorbo?

  No, it's being serious.

• 1:01:50Hannah Berner?

  Let's have, let's-

• 1:01:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait.

• 1:01:52Hannah Berner?

  Let's be camp.

• 1:01:52Paige DeSorbo?

  I actually did wear my nipple bra out last night.

• 1:01:55Hannah Berner?

  Where?

• 1:01:59Paige DeSorbo?

  So.

• 1:01:59Hannah Berner?

  The library.

• 1:02:02Hannah Berner?

  Dunkin' Donuts.

• 1:02:02Paige DeSorbo?

  I went out to dinner. And I told everyone, I said, I have a nipple bra on.

• 1:02:08Hannah Berner?

  Have you wanted to get your nipple pierced before?

• 1:02:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Did you see the newsletter where I put them nipple covers in that are pierced?

• 1:02:12Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, Bryson and I were pretty freaked out.

• 1:02:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Neither of you guys brought it up.

• 1:02:17Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, because we were fucking scared.

• 1:02:19Paige DeSorbo?

  I saw them on Amazon.

• 1:02:20Hannah Berner?

  She literally looked at me and she goes, did you see what Paige, I go, yeah, I saw it in the newsletter. And she goes, should we say something? I'm like, I don't know. I think we're just, but tend in heaven and go forth.

• 1:02:31Hannah Berner?

  Because it was fucking rage bait. It was rage bait. I'm not like.

• 1:02:34Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought you guys were.

• 1:02:35Hannah Berner?

  I was having a day. And then I saw that and I said, I don't need this shit right now. I said, she's mocking me. She's coming for me in some way.

• 1:02:43Paige DeSorbo?

  Why is that coming for you?

• 1:02:45Hannah Berner?

  It's just like, you know, I don't need that.

• 1:02:50Hannah Berner?

  Like, also, there's only one for one psycho person on, like, this is the newsletter. You pick something nice and chic and pretty, and I pick something off color. And then you post that, and I said, everything's off. I don't like this. I don't, I'm not gonna, because like, it's like if you give someone attention for doing something bad, they like it and they do it again.

• 1:03:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:10Hannah Berner?

  But because I'm such a goody-two-shoes, it's really off-brand for me. Like, I would never get my nipples pierced. Also, I have like a phobia of like.

• 1:03:17Paige DeSorbo?

  I looked into it for a while.

• 1:03:27Hannah Berner?

  Your mom, your poor mom. Like, she's, she's making a rosary. She's like.

• 1:03:33Paige DeSorbo?

  She's like, where did I go wrong? I grade for her every day.

• 1:03:38Hannah Berner?

  I have a fear that if you.

• 1:03:43Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. You are everyone's dream child. You had a fear of what? You were gonna get like an infection?

• 1:03:49Hannah Berner?

  No, I have a fear that I'd be paralyzed.

• 1:03:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh my god.

• 1:03:55Hannah Berner?

  Paralyzed. That's so fucking crazy.

• 1:04:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Why?

• 1:04:02Hannah Berner?

  I thought that like, your nipple would lose feeling.

• 1:04:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, that can happen. Yeah, that actually can happen, I think.

• 1:04:10Hannah Berner?

  And then, there was a time where I thought it was cool to get your, um, your inner ear pierced. It's called like a...

• 1:04:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:04:17Hannah Berner?

  It's called, um, it has a stupid name.

• 1:04:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:20Hannah Berner?

  It's like Icarus or something, or it, what is this called? I feel like...

• 1:04:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Shoot, that's gonna really annoy me. What is that called?

• 1:04:26Hannah Berner?

  Conch.

• 1:04:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Chris, look this up.

• 1:04:29Hannah Berner?

  Conch, like a seashell?

• 1:04:30Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know, how do we even describe it?

• 1:04:32Hannah Berner?

  It's called, it's that inner ear thing? Trachea.

• 1:04:35Paige DeSorbo?

  No, that's your throat. Tra, um...

• 1:04:39Hannah Berner?

  Tragus.

• 1:04:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes!

• 1:04:40Hannah Berner?

  Which sounds like a labia. It sounds like something in the vagina that men, like, don't know what it is.

• 1:04:44Paige DeSorbo?

  It sounds like something in like Game of Thrones.

• 1:04:46Hannah Berner?

  I really wanted to get my tragus pierced for like a week.

• 1:04:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:49Hannah Berner?

  And I did all the research.

• 1:04:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Clean tragus, sub the no.

• 1:04:56Hannah Berner?

  I'm like, I think my tragus is inflamed. No, I really was like, what is cr...

• 1:05:03Speaker 03

  I'm sorry, there's like 12 different names for these things. There's a diagram for this.

• 1:05:06Hannah Berner?

  Okay, it's, it's tragus, it's tragus.

• 1:05:09Paige DeSorbo?

  I think it is.

• 1:05:09Hannah Berner?

  So I, I read that if it goes wrong, it could like fuck up your balance.

• 1:05:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh.

• 1:05:16Hannah Berner?

  And I was like, well then I won't go pro as a tennis player. And my dad would be so mad at me. Turns out, could have done it.

• 1:05:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Turns out, could have pierced it a couple times.

• 1:05:26Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, I could have used it as an excuse. Um, so I didn't get it for that reason. But yeah, I have a phobia. Also, I really wanna get... I mean, you know I love a what's it called?

• 1:05:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Ear cuff.

• 1:05:36Hannah Berner?

  Ear cuff? But I realized if you get it like permanent, you like can't sleep on that side.

• 1:05:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Like if you get your cartilage pierced?

• 1:05:43Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, like it'll, it'll hurt. Like those little things will ruin my life.

• 1:05:48Paige DeSorbo?

  I agree. I have heard that cartilage hurts because like, it's so thick there.

• 1:05:53Hannah Berner?

  Cause I try to nap a lot with an ear cuff, and I have to take off the ear cuff to nap.

• 1:05:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, of course. I, I have sensory issues.

• 1:06:01Hannah Berner?

  100%.

• 1:06:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Like I never sleep in earrings, rings, jewelry, anything.

• 1:06:05Hannah Berner?

  If I'm trying to sleep and I decide I need to like flip over, and I can't flip over because of my ear, like, I'm calling the police.

• 1:06:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:13Hannah Berner?

  On myself.

• 1:06:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Also, some earrings like really poke you.

• 1:06:16Hannah Berner?

  Mm.

• 1:06:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Like they're really a sharp bat.

• 1:06:18Hannah Berner?

  Someone invented like, um... A nap earring.

• 1:06:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:22Hannah Berner?

  Which is very niche, but it hasn't been tested by me yet. And we need to test it. Wait, so.

• 1:06:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Mom tested, kid approved.

• 1:06:29Hannah Berner?

  If you get married one day, you're gonna take off your rings before you go to sleep?

• 1:06:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Ooh.

• 1:06:35Hannah Berner?

  What a good question.

• 1:06:36Paige DeSorbo?

  What a good question. Hannah, honestly, I might.

• 1:06:40Hannah Berner?

  I recommend it. I think that's why I have, um, like bacterial infection.

• 1:06:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Because I really can't sleep in any, like, I, I could sleep in, I could sleep in rings and bracelets. I'm never sleeping in necklaces or earrings.

• 1:06:56Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. I actually used to live in a necklace. Like, I'd put on a necklace and I'm like, this is me until it, like, falls off.

• 1:07:02Paige DeSorbo?

  I can't.

• 1:07:03Hannah Berner?

  I think I wore the same necklace, like, all high school, college.

• 1:07:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Was it a Tiffany heart?

• 1:07:09Hannah Berner?

  No, it was like a little tennis racket.

• 1:07:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh my gosh.

• 1:07:12Hannah Berner?

  You just call me a nerd under your breath.

• 1:07:13Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I said, oh my gosh.

• 1:07:15Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I did something I think you'd find relatable.

• 1:07:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 1:07:18Hannah Berner?

  So I bought this face care thing, of one of those masks that you put on that you wake up and it's like you peel it off.

• 1:07:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:26Hannah Berner?

  The second I put it on, it dried up and I felt so dry. I don't wanna say it.

• 1:07:32Paige DeSorbo?

  No, say it.

• 1:07:33Hannah Berner?

  Metacube.

• 1:07:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, you did it wrong. You must have done it wrong. You take, okay, so you take it out of the package, you're in.

• 1:07:39Hannah Berner?

  No, it's not, it's literally just lotion.

• 1:07:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, the one that comes out of the squeeze bottle?

• 1:07:44Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, yeah, you put it on.

• 1:07:46Hannah Berner?

  And then it immediately, like, I felt so dry.

• 1:07:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:50Hannah Berner?

  And they were like, give the sleep in it, and then the morning you pull it off or whatever, but like, after twenty minutes, I like, had a freak out and I washed it off.

• 1:07:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Maybe you're allergic to it.

• 1:07:59Hannah Berner?

  I think that my skin is just too dry.

• 1:08:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Why don't you just get, why don't, why did you even get that one? That's too high level for you. You have to get, just get the other one.

• 1:08:10Hannah Berner?

  Okay.

• 1:08:11Paige DeSorbo?

  They're really good. You're gonna love it.

• 1:08:13Hannah Berner?

  Okay.

• 1:08:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Your mom should get them too.

• 1:08:15Hannah Berner?

  Oh, you have to comfort my family.

• 1:08:20Hannah Berner?

  Don't talk about my family.

• 1:08:24Hannah Berner?

  Thank you for giggling with us guys.

• 1:08:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Thank you for being here while we worked some things out.

• 1:08:29Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, I think we figured some stuff out. Congratulate Paige on her popping her Botox cherry, her new face. If she looks different, don't tell her. Just be like, you look the same.

• 1:08:39Paige DeSorbo?

  No, literally, don't tell me.

• 1:08:42Hannah Berner?

  No, you look amazing.

• 1:08:43Paige DeSorbo?

  Thank you.

• 1:08:43Hannah Berner?

  You really do look amazing. You just look awake.

• 1:08:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:47Hannah Berner?

  Which honestly, we've never looked like. Like, what's it like being awake right now?

• 1:08:50Paige DeSorbo?

  My whole brand is now changed.

• 1:08:51Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. Oh, my God. You have to change Daphne completely to like running wear. She goes, we're doing marathons in Daphne now. I'm going to Wisconsin this weekend in Madison, Green Bay. So you guys there, get tickets.

• 1:09:04Paige DeSorbo?

  And thank you Duncan for supporting this episode of Giggly Squad.

• 1:09:13Speaker 04

  One thing casual fans don't understand is how [BLEEP] good pro wrestling is. Think you know wrestling? Join us on the Busted Open Podcast every single day. The biggest stories, the biggest debates, no filters. If you're a wrestling fan, this is your daily stop. Wrestling is better when the fans are as excited as I am. Seven days a week, breaking news and interviews with the biggest names in wrestling. Every episode is waiting for you in the podcast feed, wherever you get your podcasts.

• 1:09:44Speaker 05

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• 1:10:25Speaker 05

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