I've Never Seen This Before | Financial Audit

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Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:27Speaker 01

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• 0:55Speaker 02

  I wanted to come on here because, like I said, I feel like you've had a lot of libtarded trans people on here.

• 1:01Caleb Hammer?

  I still don't know what that means.

• 1:02Speaker 02

  Like libbed out.

• 1:03Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, we have people left-wing on the show. We have people right-wing on the show.

• 1:07Speaker 02

  I thought maybe you might be one as well.

• 1:09Caleb Hammer?

  Why am I libtard?

• 1:11Speaker 02

  Just the people that you have on here.

• 1:12Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my goodness, you have an only [BLEEP].

• 1:14Speaker 02

  It has nothing to do with me working with kids during the day.

• 1:19Speaker 02

  I put them through training boot camp, essentially.

• 1:22Caleb Hammer?

  I'm also sure the parents of the school loves that you have a [BLEEP] boot camp.

• 1:28Speaker 04

  Something big is coming. Something that's going to change personal finance forever. And the first 500 members get to lead the charge. Go to dollarwise.com to change the future.

• 1:44Speaker 02

  Hi, I'm Vixen. I'm 32 years old. I'm from Minneapolis, Minnesota, and this is Financial Audit.

• 1:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, I have to ask a couple of questions, just so I'm being respectful. One.

• 1:59Caleb Hammer?

  Are you born a woman?

• 2:05Speaker 02

  No.

• 2:06Caleb Hammer?

  Really?

• 2:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:07Caleb Hammer?

  I hit it. Well, I guess that's actually not that complicated.

• 2:11Speaker 02

  Not you clocking tea right away.

• 2:13Caleb Hammer?

  Well, fake tits and masculine features.

• 2:18Caleb Hammer?

  Who would have thought? Not me. Good. I just want to make sure I'm being respectful.

• 2:23Speaker 02

  I paid a lot for you to not say that.

• 2:25Caleb Hammer?

  And you're on the sheet. Well, yeah, but that never really works.

• 2:28Speaker 02

  I know.

• 2:29Caleb Hammer?

  But that's okay.

• 2:29Speaker 02

  People know.

• 2:30Caleb Hammer?

  Um, but that's okay. Doesn't mean I don't respect, uh, you know, whatever you want to do. So are you, she/her? You specifically requested not to do pronouns at the beginning.

• 2:40Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 2:41Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and I can do that.

• 2:43Speaker 02

  I've been called they/them before.

• 2:45Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, that was very upsetting.

• 2:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:47Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, based on what you just did with your face?

• 2:48Speaker 02

  It's offensive.

• 2:49Caleb Hammer?

  And you are naturally white?

• 2:54Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 2:55Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, because I see like lots of dark tones that I feel like you're trying to hide on your face.

• 3:00Speaker 02

  Oh, sure.

• 3:00Caleb Hammer?

  Like there's some black here and here.

• 3:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, that's just contouring. It didn't blend well enough.

• 3:05Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, I thought maybe you were pulling like a white chicks situation.

• 3:07Speaker 02

  No, I'm naturally white, Norwegian.

• 3:09Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, that's good. Norwegian trans, we love them.

• 3:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:13Caleb Hammer?

  That's everyone's favorite kind of trans.

• 3:15Speaker 02

  I mean, you've had a lot of interesting trans on here.

• 3:19Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, yeah, okay.

• 3:20Speaker 02

  You've had a lot of lived out trans on here.

• 3:25Caleb Hammer?

  Lived out trans?

• 3:26Speaker 02

  Libtarded trans, yeah.

• 3:27Caleb Hammer?

  Libtarded, what does that even mean?

• 3:29Speaker 02

  I don't know. I was thinking that you kind of had a thing for libtarded trans.

• 3:33Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think I've, I mean, I don't hate trans people, but I also don't think I've ever had sex with a trans people.

• 3:39Speaker 02

  Never know.

• 3:45Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I mean, once you get down there, you kind of know, but.

• 3:49Speaker 02

  Sometimes, sometimes not, though.

• 3:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, then pause. Can I ask the question?

• 3:54Speaker 02

  You may ask the question.

• 3:55Caleb Hammer?

  Is it there? Does it dangle?

• 3:57Speaker 02

  No.

• 3:59Caleb Hammer?

  Really?

• 4:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:00Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness, how much does this cost?

• 4:02Speaker 02

  Well, thankfully, I got it covered by insurance.

• 4:08Caleb Hammer?

  Insurance?

• 4:09Speaker 02

  Yes, insurance.

• 4:10Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, a lot of people are going to be upset that they've contributed to the pile. That makes their premiums more expensive for that, but.

• 4:18Caleb Hammer?

  I don't really care what people do, genuinely, generally, so.

• 4:22Speaker 02

  I wanted to come on here because, like I said, I feel like you've had a lot of libtarded trans people on here.

• 4:28Caleb Hammer?

  I still don't know what that means.

• 4:29Speaker 02

  Like, libbed out, like, super left-wing.

• 4:31Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, we have people left-wing on the show, we have people right-wing on the show.

• 4:35Speaker 02

  I thought maybe you might be one as well. Like, a libtard.

• 4:40Caleb Hammer?

  Why do you even think that? Like, I don't even care if someone does, but...

• 4:46Speaker 02

  I don't know, I've watched a lot of your, a lot of your shows.

• 4:48Caleb Hammer?

  No, every time I take a political compass test, I'm pretty much in the middle. I'll take left-wing positions when the facts are there, I'll take right-wing positions when the facts are there. That doesn't mean I sit in the middle on every issue. It means I start from the middle and then go where the facts are, I don't really give a shit where it comes from. Why am I libtard?

• 5:05Speaker 02

  Just the people that you have on here.

• 5:07Caleb Hammer?

  We just accept who applies on the show. I'm guessing you are not libtard, because that's very important to you. Identity politics, critical to you making it through your life, I guess.

• 5:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, oh yeah, definitely, especially in this world.

• 5:20Caleb Hammer?

  But you're trans, you know that, right?

• 5:22Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 5:23Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 5:24Speaker 02

  A lot of people don't like me.

• 5:25Caleb Hammer?

  Do you think you should play in women's sports?

• 5:27Speaker 02

  No.

• 5:27Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 5:28Speaker 02

  I don't think that's fair.

• 5:29Caleb Hammer?

  You're a controversial one, aren't you?

• 5:31Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 5:31Caleb Hammer?

  You're all over the place.

• 5:32Speaker 02

  All over the place.

• 5:33Caleb Hammer?

  How did you get there?

• 5:34Speaker 02

  How did I get where?

• 5:35Caleb Hammer?

  It's rare to get a right-wing trans.

• 5:37Speaker 02

  I wouldn't call myself right-wing.

• 5:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you immediately called me a libtard, it's hard to not think you are.

• 5:42Speaker 02

  I know, but I wouldn't, I don't agree with everything the right extreme likes going.

• 5:48Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 5:51Caleb Hammer?

  Just confusion out of the, okay.

• 5:53Speaker 02

  I know, I'm an interesting one.

• 5:55Caleb Hammer?

  What do you do for a living? How about, let's start there.

• 5:57Speaker 02

  What do you think I do for a living?

• 5:59Caleb Hammer?

  I already know what you do for a living, because you told me before, dumbass.

• 6:02Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 6:04Caleb Hammer?

  Stupid bitch, and I can actually use that word correctly, you know?

• 6:06Speaker 02

  True.

• 6:07Caleb Hammer?

  Or someone say incorrectly, but I don't care.

• 6:10Speaker 02

  There's a lot worse things you can call me too.

• 6:14Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not using the F-word, you're not gonna get me to use it, I'm not gonna use it. I'm not gonna use it.

• 6:18Speaker 02

  We'll see, there's another one.

• 6:19Caleb Hammer?

  You're not gonna get me to use it, Colton.

• 6:20Speaker 02

  There's another one.

• 6:21Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not gonna say it.

• 6:22Speaker 02

  There, there's another one.

• 6:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, that one.

• 6:27Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, was that the one?

• 6:28Speaker 02

  Yeah. I use it all the time.

• 6:30Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. I assume you use the N-word as well.

• 6:33Speaker 02

  No, not really.

• 6:35Caleb Hammer?

  No?

• 6:36Speaker 02

  I've been accused of it, but...

• 6:38Caleb Hammer?

  Who accuses people of using the N-word?

• 6:40Speaker 02

  People, people that don't like...

• 6:42Caleb Hammer?

  Without actually hearing you say the N-word?

• 6:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, no.

• 6:46Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, you do look like a Fox News host with a, with a, with a jawline.

• 6:50Speaker 02

  With a jawline?

• 6:51Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 6:52Speaker 02

  Thank you. Thank you.

• 6:55Caleb Hammer?

  Right?

• 6:55Speaker 02

  I, I'm planning more surgery, so...

• 6:57Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, how much ass this all costs?

• 6:59Speaker 02

  Well...

• 6:59Caleb Hammer?

  Because this is financial audit.

• 7:01Speaker 02

  Right, and it's, it is, it is mostly covered by insurance, so...

• 7:06Caleb Hammer?

  But what, okay, what, what have you spent on it dollar-wise?

• 7:10Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 7:10Caleb Hammer?

  Great budget now, by the way.

• 7:11Speaker 02

  I was just gonna say, nice place.

• 7:12Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, alright, calm down, calm down, calm down. How much does it cost you?

• 7:15Speaker 02

  Uh, upwards.

• 7:17Caleb Hammer?

  The, the, some of the other people are coming in late, Brandon and Lindsay, they watch so they can do the pro show, post-show. Brandon, we have a...

• 7:25Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, he knows.

• 7:27Caleb Hammer?

  I love it, we love it.

• 7:28Speaker 02

  I waved that N before I came in, and I was like, who is this person?

• 7:32Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so how much does this cost you?

• 7:34Speaker 02

  Um...

• 7:36Caleb Hammer?

  You're affirming surgeries.

• 7:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, well, what have I had to pay, or what is it like?

• 7:41Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my goodness, yes, your money, why have you spent? Because I know you don't make much money, even though you haven't told us what you do yet. It's kind of annoying, but I know what you do, I assume it doesn't make that much, but please, how much have you spent? Please?

• 7:54Speaker 02

  It's like, I'm very thankful, I've done like five to seven.

• 7:58Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, over the course of...

• 8:00Speaker 02

  Like, years?

• 8:01Caleb Hammer?

  Over the course of how long?

• 8:03Speaker 02

  Uh, six years.

• 8:04Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and how much is the rest of your, your surgeries, gender-affirming, gonna cost?

• 8:12Speaker 02

  Uh...

• 8:12Caleb Hammer?

  You know she doesn't have a penis?

• 8:15Caleb Hammer?

  It's impressive.

• 8:16Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 8:18Caleb Hammer?

  Sorry, I just, I like to share these things with Brandon.

• 8:20Speaker 02

  That's fine.

• 8:20Caleb Hammer?

  He didn't get to experience the first five minutes of this mind-blowing conversation.

• 8:23Speaker 02

  That's fine.

• 8:25Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 8:25Speaker 02

  So how much?

• 8:27Caleb Hammer?

  Don't you just leak urine, isn't that the issue, though? I heard, like, I've heard of that.

• 8:31Speaker 02

  That is, uh, something that happens, yeah.

• 8:33Caleb Hammer?

  See, you, you gave a face like, well, that's weird.

• 8:35Speaker 02

  Well, that's not my experience, but it has happened.

• 8:37Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, it happens to...

• 8:38Speaker 02

  It happens to people that don't grow the right people.

• 8:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so, what do you do?

• 8:42Speaker 02

  Um, I am a, uh, manager at a coffee shop.

• 8:47Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 8:50Caleb Hammer?

  We got there.

• 8:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 8:52Caleb Hammer?

  Good, very good. And how much do you make? Vixen?

• 8:54Speaker 02

  Um, about eight hundred a week.

• 8:58Caleb Hammer?

  That was at your net? Is that what's your account?

• 9:00Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 9:01Caleb Hammer?

  I have another one coming in. Lindsay, do you know she does not have a penis? I did know that. That's impressive. How do you know these things? You're not even the producer assigned to this episode. Well, because I'm obsessed with her, so. Oh, we got lots of big fans in the office. Okay, so is it eight hundred net?

• 9:17Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 9:18Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, times fifty-two, so forty-one thousand, six hundred dollars a year to be the manager?

• 9:25Speaker 02

  She said forty-one thousand?

• 9:26Caleb Hammer?

  Is it eight hundred dollars a week, you said?

• 9:28Speaker 02

  Yeah. What did you, what did you put in?

• 9:30Caleb Hammer?

  Times fifty-two, because there's fifty-two weeks a year, forty-one thousand, six hundred, net. Net. That's net?

• 9:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:41Speaker 02

  I thought it was something like fifty.

• 9:43Caleb Hammer?

  Is that before taxes?

• 9:45Speaker 02

  No, that's after.

• 9:48Speaker 02

  I thought it was like eight hundred, eight hundred a week.

• 9:50Caleb Hammer?

  Do you know how much hits?

• 9:52Speaker 02

  I thought so.

• 9:53Caleb Hammer?

  Wait, do you not actually know what hits your account?

• 9:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, that was like eight fifty or eight hundred.

• 9:58Caleb Hammer?

  You thought?

• 9:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:59Caleb Hammer?

  But you actually don't know?

• 10:00Speaker 02

  Well, when I look.

• 10:01Caleb Hammer?

  Is it hourly?

• 10:01Speaker 02

  When I look, no, it's salary.

• 10:03Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, then this should be pretty consistent. The payroll that came in last month should be the number, right?

• 10:09Speaker 02

  Should be.

• 10:09Caleb Hammer?

  It was four thousand, nine hundred, seventy-three.

• 10:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:17Caleb Hammer?

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• 10:59Caleb Hammer?

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• 11:44Speaker 02

  Okay, okay.

• 11:46Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you? How do you not know?

• 11:48Speaker 02

  I, I

• 11:49Caleb Hammer?

  Did they transition to the, the brain to dumb blonde?

• 11:53Speaker 02

  Well, that does happen. Yeah. There's a whole subculture online about that.

• 11:57Caleb Hammer?

  No, what?

• 12:00Caleb Hammer?

  That trans becomes stupid after getting rid of penis?

• 12:02Speaker 02

  Yeah. I don't know about getting rid of the penis. I don't know about getting rid of the penis.

• 12:06Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I don't know. After what?

• 12:08Speaker 02

  After you transitioned.

• 12:08Caleb Hammer?

  Is this real?

• 12:09Speaker 02

  People

• 12:10Caleb Hammer?

  Cause I don't know what's real and

• 12:11Speaker 02

  People claim that all the hormones changes, like your biology and your chemistry and stuff like that.

• 12:19Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, I mean, you're doing something unnatural.

• 12:21Speaker 02

  Right. But it doesn't change that much. Besides physical features.

• 12:26Caleb Hammer?

  But you just said hormones and stuff. I think it, getting rid of your balls doesn't change much hormonal?

• 12:32Speaker 02

  Well, it stops, you stop producing as much testosterone.

• 12:35Caleb Hammer?

  Well, that's, yeah, that. And aren't you doing estrogen?

• 12:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:39Caleb Hammer?

  Well, are these not hormonal changes?

• 12:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it's not changing like the, like the biochemical what makeup of your DNA, which is what people say. They call it trans women biological women. Which is not true.

• 12:53Caleb Hammer?

  Correct.

• 12:55Caleb Hammer?

  This is your excuse for not knowing how much you make?

• 12:58Speaker 02

  No, no, that's just genuine, like, I was shocked. I thought it was like 800 a week.

• 13:04Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my goodness, Colton said you went on a full rant of a laundry list of reasons you don't even like the trans community. What are you?

• 13:10Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 13:11Caleb Hammer?

  You're such a confusing beast, aren't you?

• 13:13Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 13:14Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 13:15Speaker 02

  Beast, definitely.

• 13:16Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah?

• 13:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:18Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you? Why, why, why, why'd you go fully down this rabbit hole and you hate everyone around you that's in your community?

• 13:24Speaker 02

  I don't know if I like hate them, I just don't agree with it.

• 13:27Caleb Hammer?

  A what? Don't agree with what?

• 13:28Speaker 02

  I don't, like, I don't agree with what the trans community is putting out there.

• 13:33Caleb Hammer?

  And I asked what? Oh my goodness, you have gone, I don't know how this happened. What is wrong with you? You are not smart. Please, what?

• 13:40Speaker 02

  I'm just, I'm just saying, like,

• 13:42Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 13:43Speaker 02

  I believe that it's okay that trans women are biological men, and it's okay to say that.

• 13:50Caleb Hammer?

  I think everyone agrees with that.

• 13:52Speaker 02

  No, they don't.

• 13:52Caleb Hammer?

  Biological?

• 13:53Speaker 02

  They don't, no.

• 13:55Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, that's,

• 13:56Speaker 02

  I know.

• 13:57Caleb Hammer?

  People can do whatever they want, doesn't change biology.

• 13:59Speaker 02

  I know, I know, exactly. And then we have, and then we have people saying that these young kids know that they're trans at a young age. It's like, no.

• 14:09Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but that's like 1% of the population that's actually even like acting on that shit, like, it's,

• 14:13Speaker 02

  But it, but it gets blown out of proportion.

• 14:15Caleb Hammer?

  It certainly does. Welcome to winning elections, but, I mean, that's what, okay, so that's your whole freak out?

• 14:21Speaker 02

  Well, no, I just, I have values and why I don't believe that's a thing.

• 14:26Caleb Hammer?

  Do you watch Foxes?

• 14:27Speaker 02

  No, I don't.

• 14:28Caleb Hammer?

  Who do you watch?

• 14:29Speaker 02

  I don't really watch news.

• 14:30Caleb Hammer?

  Where are you getting things from?

• 14:32Speaker 02

  Lived experience?

• 14:33Caleb Hammer?

  No, come on, you have opinions and some, usually it's hard to get into an opinion without at least knowing it exists somewhere and you, come on.

• 14:42Speaker 02

  I mean, I have friends on both sides.

• 14:46Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 14:47Speaker 02

  I have friends that are very

• 14:48Caleb Hammer?

  So listen.

• 14:49Speaker 02

  And I have friends that are more right wing.

• 14:52Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, but the way you talk about it, libbed out and right wing clearly makes you look less upon the left, meaning you are right wing regardless of what you say.

• 15:03Speaker 02

  I mean, I consider myself more libertarian.

• 15:04Caleb Hammer?

  If you are.

• 15:05Speaker 02

  I consider myself more libertarian.

• 15:07Caleb Hammer?

  Okay libertarian, so you can do whatever you want.

• 15:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 15:10Caleb Hammer?

  Including your children.

• 15:11Speaker 02

  Well, I guess. Obviously, you can do whatever you want. People are adults. I don't know about kids, though. Yeah.

• 15:19Caleb Hammer?

  If we're going full libertarian.

• 15:21Speaker 02

  Before I was, I worked as a manager, though I was an elementary teacher.

• 15:25Caleb Hammer?

  Well, in Minneapolis.

• 15:27Speaker 02

  Actually, I wasn't in Minneapolis at that time.

• 15:29Caleb Hammer?

  I was gonna say, they wouldn't care, but I could just see that being hyper controversial. Where were you?

• 15:34Speaker 02

  I was in a red state, Fargo, North Dakota.

• 15:36Caleb Hammer?

  And what did they think of that?

• 15:39Speaker 02

  They'd never wrong with it.

• 15:40Caleb Hammer?

  Is it because you're halfway convincing?

• 15:42Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 15:43Caleb Hammer?

  Um, halfway.

• 15:43Speaker 02

  I don't know. I'll take half.

• 15:45Caleb Hammer?

  She's getting there. She's spending more.

• 15:48Speaker 02

  I'd never, they'd have a problem with it because I just did my job.

• 15:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, okay. Well, you know, maybe things are blown over the top online. Who would have thought?

• 15:55Speaker 02

  Well, they are. That's what I'm saying. Usually when people see trans or hear about trans, you, they have some kind of, trans women are women and these minors should be allowed.

• 16:05Caleb Hammer?

  Are you a woman?

• 16:06Speaker 02

  No. I'm a trans woman.

• 16:09Caleb Hammer?

  So it's like a new breed.

• 16:10Speaker 02

  Sure. That works.

• 16:13Speaker 05

  Wow, man.

• 16:19Speaker 02

  I don't love the idea of saying trans women are men, but it's like biologically.

• 16:23Caleb Hammer?

  Biological, what gender? Don't they separate gender and biological?

• 16:27Speaker 02

  All the time. I identify, yeah.

• 16:29Caleb Hammer?

  Well, look what you've done. You've done something. Like you can't, you're not identifying?

• 16:33Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, I guess, but I don't, I don't go around saying, I identify as a woman.

• 16:40Caleb Hammer?

  Very conflicting, just on your existence.

• 16:43Speaker 02

  I know.

• 16:44Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, but you were forced to leave your job as a teacher, so obviously they had some kind of issues. What?

• 16:49Speaker 02

  So on my social media, I post some more spicy content.

• 16:55Caleb Hammer?

  Spicy, but they're all fake anyway.

• 16:57Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:58Caleb Hammer?

  So what is there even spicy about it? Things that don't exist, your boobs aren't real.

• 17:01Speaker 02

  The parents.

• 17:02Caleb Hammer?

  Your vagina's not real.

• 17:03Speaker 02

  The parents didn't.

• 17:04Caleb Hammer?

  I guess if you post a butthole, those are pretty gender neutral.

• 17:06Speaker 02

  Which I can't do.

• 17:07Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, then what's the point?

• 17:09Speaker 02

  The parents would find my stuff.

• 17:14Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, look at you. Your tits are right now. And I'm not even looking. You know why? Because they're fake. Why even look at that point?

• 17:20Speaker 02

  Fair.

• 17:21Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 17:22Speaker 02

  But parents would find my stuff.

• 17:24Caleb Hammer?

  Wow, are you posting X-rated stuff?

• 17:26Speaker 02

  No.

• 17:27Caleb Hammer?

  How risque?

• 17:28Speaker 02

  Just like-

• 17:29Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, show us.

• 17:30Speaker 02

  Lingerie.

• 17:31Caleb Hammer?

  Show us.

• 17:31Speaker 02

  Lingerie photos.

• 17:32Caleb Hammer?

  Let's see. See if this was a justified firing.

• 17:36Speaker 02

  I didn't get fired from I left it.

• 17:38Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, yeah, forced to leave your job is kind of what I got.

• 17:45Caleb Hammer?

  This is your risque?

• 17:46Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 17:47Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, this is the kind of content that people post when they're-

• 17:52Speaker 00

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• 18:17Caleb Hammer?

  Trying to sell OF.

• 18:18Speaker 02

  True.

• 18:19Caleb Hammer?

  So it kind of makes sense, right? I don't think I would want my teacher doing that.

• 18:22Speaker 02

  But how are they finding me?

• 18:24Caleb Hammer?

  Well, they looked you up.

• 18:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:26Caleb Hammer?

  Because you're the teacher.

• 18:27Speaker 02

  Right, but it wasn't, it's not the same name.

• 18:28Caleb Hammer?

  One person found it and then they shared it within.

• 18:31Speaker 02

  I know, but like, why are you, that's my private business. That has nothing to do with me working with kids during the day.

• 18:39Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I mean, I mean, this kind of makes sense, right? I would understand why they would kind of want you out of there, right? Especially in a more conservative state?

• 18:48Speaker 02

  No. No, I disagree.

• 18:50Caleb Hammer?

  When was the last time you were like...

• 18:54Caleb Hammer?

  Appearance of a guy?

• 18:58Caleb Hammer?

  Can I see it?

• 19:00Speaker 02

  You didn't see it?

• 19:01Caleb Hammer?

  Of a guy, you being a guy?

• 19:02Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:03Caleb Hammer?

  No, show me.

• 19:03Speaker 02

  You just went through the pictures.

• 19:05Caleb Hammer?

  I wasn't looking intently. I was just like, you know, seeing that, like, I think it was relatively fair. Oh my goodness, what the [bleep]. That is crazy. Make sure we put that on screen right now. What the [bleep]?

• 19:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:20Caleb Hammer?

  That is crazy. Are you doing anything to your voice, or is that natural?

• 19:24Speaker 02

  Um, well, I mean, this is how I talk now.

• 19:26Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but are you doing something intentional, or is that just how it is?

• 19:29Speaker 02

  This is how I, this is how I talk now. So, as, like I said, I was an educator, a music educator, I should say.

• 19:34Caleb Hammer?

  Really? What were you teaching music?

• 19:36Speaker 02

  What? Where?

• 19:37Caleb Hammer?

  What? What kind of music?

• 19:39Speaker 02

  Oh, elementary, elementary music educator.

• 19:41Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 19:42Speaker 02

  I know, sorry. But I was also a voice teacher.

• 19:44Caleb Hammer?

  So not a real job. Oh, there's a real one.

• 19:45Speaker 02

  I was also a voice teacher. So I understand how the vocal mechanism works. So I was able to train my voice to sound like this now.

• 19:52Caleb Hammer?

  So how you doing 5,000 hours a month?

• 19:54Speaker 02

  By the way, thank you. That's a compliment.

• 19:55Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 19:56Speaker 02

  About my voice.

• 19:58Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, I mean, you're imitating like a biological woman.

• 20:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:01Caleb Hammer?

  So I thought, you know, maybe you're doing something.

• 20:04Speaker 02

  No, no surgery, though. No surgery on that.

• 20:06Caleb Hammer?

  That's a surgery you can do?

• 20:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:08Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my goodness.

• 20:09Speaker 02

  Vocal feminization, VFS, they call it. Highly against that. It's extremely dangerous.

• 20:14Caleb Hammer?

  Well, then, yeah, probably shouldn't do that.

• 20:16Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:16Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, this episode is not about trans, despite what you think. However, it's just, okay, rabbit holes. Listen, you thought you made $3,400 a month, but you make $4,900 a month. How the [bleep] were you so wrong? How can you pay bills? How can you even pay bills if you're off by that much?

• 20:33Speaker 02

  I put everything on my Apple card and then paid off at the end of the week.

• 20:37Caleb Hammer?

  The end of the week?

• 20:38Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 20:39Caleb Hammer?

  But that's not po- no. If you think you make $1,500 less than you make, how are you even surviving?

• 20:47Caleb Hammer?

  How are you budgeting? How are you existing? How are you doing anything whatsoever?

• 20:53Speaker 02

  I mean, like I said.

• 20:55Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, what was your outflow? I have your inflows 5,000. What was your outflow?

• 20:59Speaker 02

  Oh, gosh. Um, just this last month?

• 21:03Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 21:03Speaker 02

  Hmm. Well, this was Christmas. Oof. $2,500?

• 21:10Caleb Hammer?

  What's wrong with you? It was $9,307.

• 21:16Caleb Hammer?

  How can you be that wildly off? What are you talking about? What is wrong with you?

• 21:21Speaker 02

  Um, I don't know. I thought, I thought I understood it. See, this is what people say. This is why you're here. This is why I'm here.

• 21:30Caleb Hammer?

  Sure, but I need to know a little bit about where you're coming from, how your life is now, how your mentality is now, or else we can't fix anything. How the were you that far off? In your own assessment, what do you think? Going back to last month, you're looking, you thought it was 2,000 something. How? How, how, how were you there?

• 21:48Speaker 02

  Just because I was thinking about Christmas gifts.

• 21:50Caleb Hammer?

  So you thought it was only 2,000? Your entire spending for everything? What's your rent?

• 21:54Speaker 02

  So rent is altogether 1,650.

• 21:57Caleb Hammer?

  So how the do you think you only spent 2,000? You think everything else in your life was only $400 more? 500, 600 dollars more?

• 22:04Speaker 02

  Sure, sure. Okay, I got you.

• 22:06Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 22:08Speaker 02

  I was not, sorry, I wasn't following my question.

• 22:11Speaker 02

  Was not following.

• 22:12Caleb Hammer?

  Broken, okay.

• 22:14Speaker 02

  So I spent $9,000 last month? Oh my God.

• 22:20Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, I agree. That's crazy. Uh, what's crazier is that you think you only spent $500 more than your rent for all of your expenses combined outside of that, including any kind of fun you did, healthcare that you do, co-pays, trips, gas, food, electricity, internet, gas for driving.

• 22:41Speaker 02

  All of the electricity, internet, all of that is bundled in with my.

• 22:45Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, but the fact is you thought you only spent $400 more than your rent. What the are you talking about? What does it look like right now? The way you do your finances, please?

• 22:57Speaker 02

  Well, since I started watching your show, I downloaded the Dollar Wise Budgeting App.

• 23:03Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, it's a good start. So tell me, what are you doing? What does things look like? You're clearly not using it if you thought you only spent $2,500 last month.

• 23:10Speaker 02

  No, I haven't.

• 23:11Caleb Hammer?

  What the are you talking about?

• 23:12Speaker 02

  You're right. Um, like I said, I am just paying everything off my Apple card at the end.

• 23:19Caleb Hammer?

  Is that it? That's what your entire life looks like?

• 23:21Speaker 02

  That's my budget.

• 23:22Caleb Hammer?

  Define your entire financial life. I pay off my Apple card. That's it. Nothing else exists. You can't tell me a single thing outside of that? What is wrong with you? How can you not? You know, you're on a podcast, right?

• 23:34Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 23:34Caleb Hammer?

  How can you tell me what the is going on? There has to be more in your life, other than you pay on a credit card and that, oh, I got tits. Congratulations. Can only take you so far in life.

• 23:46Speaker 02

  But I like them.

• 23:56Caleb Hammer?

  Close. Not perfect. Almost there.

• 24:11Caleb Hammer?

  Good. Well done.

• 24:13Speaker 02

  You don't like them?

• 24:14Caleb Hammer?

  I don't care. One, they're fake.

• 24:18Caleb Hammer?

  And two.

• 24:19Speaker 02

  And?

• 24:19Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 24:20Speaker 02

  And?

• 24:20Caleb Hammer?

  I just, I wouldn't do it because it's hard when it doesn't get naturally wet. And also, does it look like it?

• 24:26Speaker 02

  My boobs doesn't look like it.

• 24:28Caleb Hammer?

  It's like, yeah, but if I'm interested in the boobs in other way, it means we're going in other directions. So it's like, do I want to go to the full package? Probably not. So I mean, it's just, you know, I'm just.

• 24:36Speaker 02

  Do you know?

• 24:37Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 24:37Speaker 02

  Do you have you? Do you even know?

• 24:39Caleb Hammer?

  Does your vagina get naturally wet?

• 24:40Speaker 02

  Yes, it does.

• 24:41Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 24:42Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 24:42Caleb Hammer?

  Ha.

• 24:43Speaker 02

  Cause I did a surgery that, um, a different kind of like procedure. It's called, oh, what?

• 24:53Caleb Hammer?

  Does it look like a vagina?

• 24:55Speaker 02

  I think so.

• 24:56Caleb Hammer?

  With all the roast beef and folds and everything? Has the same feeling? Has everyone said it feels the same?

• 25:02Speaker 02

  I haven't had any complaints.

• 25:08Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, yeah, but does it say it feels the same?

• 25:10Speaker 02

  I guess, yeah. I mean, I don't-

• 25:12Caleb Hammer?

  Wow, this is crazy. No, that's impressive. Congratulations. Congratulations.

• 25:18Speaker 02

  I'm trying to think.

• 25:20Caleb Hammer?

  Then, then, then you're right.

• 25:22Speaker 02

  Of what it was called.

• 25:23Caleb Hammer?

  My logic was flawed. I only don't like them because they're fake.

• 25:26Speaker 02

  Fair, but there's different, like, procedures that you can get, like, how you can get it. Like, you can get it with no depth whatsoever, more, like, aesthetic from the outside, instead of-

• 25:37Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 25:37Speaker 02

  At depth of it.

• 25:38Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, okay. Well, stop taking me down the trans rabbit hole. You are more than that. That cannot be the most-

• 25:42Speaker 02

  No, thank God, yes.

• 25:43Caleb Hammer?

  The only interesting thing in your life.

• 25:44Speaker 02

  No, I appreciate you saying that.

• 25:45Caleb Hammer?

  Exactly, yeah, you are not able to give me anything beyond that. The moment something trans-related comes up, you're able to talk like crazy. But I ask anything about your finances, you're saying, "I pay off my Apple card."

• 25:55Speaker 02

  Cause-

• 25:56Caleb Hammer?

  Give me something. I need to know what your life looks like, dude.

• 25:58Speaker 02

  It's because-

• 25:59Caleb Hammer?

  Chick.

• 26:00Speaker 02

  You can say whatever.

• 26:02Caleb Hammer?

  Dude is gender neutral in my-

• 26:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know, so is bro. It's fine, especially at this point. Especially at this point.

• 26:07Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh, go on.

• 26:08Speaker 02

  I was really thrown off by the finances thing. I thought I made more than that.

• 26:12Caleb Hammer?

  What? That you made more? No, you told me you made less.

• 26:16Speaker 02

  Well, no, that's just-

• 26:17Caleb Hammer?

  You do make more than you said.

• 26:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, I was just-

• 26:19Caleb Hammer?

  Do you not know that yet?

• 26:20Speaker 02

  I was just going by-

• 26:21Caleb Hammer?

  I have clarified that you do make about a thousand five hundred dollars more than you thought. Are you, is there, are you, have you not caught up to that yet?

• 26:28Speaker 02

  I caught, I'm caught up, yeah.

• 26:29Caleb Hammer?

  Are you sure? Oh, how do I get through this? Okay. Well, so why'd you go to Minneapolis?

• 26:37Speaker 02

  That's where I was born.

• 26:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 26:39Speaker 02

  So, born and raised Minneapolis, moved up to Fargo for college, and then-

• 26:47Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, why don't you go to like a trans daycare or something?

• 26:49Speaker 02

  A trans daycare?

• 26:52Caleb Hammer?

  You'll make an infinite amount of money and no one in Minnesota will look into you.

• 26:55Speaker 02

  Well, now in Minnesota, yeah, good, yeah, that's fair.

• 26:58Caleb Hammer?

  Were you not able to follow along on that either?

• 27:00Speaker 02

  No, I was, I was.

• 27:01Caleb Hammer?

  You know that's happening right now.

• 27:02Speaker 02

  I said it's fair.

• 27:03Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, thirty seconds later.

• 27:05Speaker 02

  I'm also white, not Somali.

• 27:08Caleb Hammer?

  But trans, it counts.

• 27:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, mm.

• 27:10Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, dude, you're like a superior class.

• 27:13Speaker 02

  I don't know about superior.

• 27:15Caleb Hammer?

  In Minnesota?

• 27:16Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's fair. It's blue, but-

• 27:18Caleb Hammer?

  It's not just, okay, oh my gosh, I swear. You are, oh, you are, how do people have conversations with you?

• 27:24Speaker 02

  It's a good question. I'm very controversial on a lot of things.

• 27:29Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think so, cuz you're not able to speak.

• 27:31Speaker 02

  You don't think so?

• 27:32Caleb Hammer?

  No, you are not conversational. You're impossible to have a conversation with.

• 27:37Speaker 02

  Besides the budgeting thing, I've been like answering your questions.

• 27:41Caleb Hammer?

  This is financial audit. I need a little bit on the money.

• 27:44Speaker 02

  I know, I know.

• 27:45Caleb Hammer?

  You gotta give me some, some information, so I can go into these numbers with any kind of knowledge.

• 27:51Speaker 02

  Right, but this is what I, this is what I'm doing. Like, pay what I said about the Apple Card. Put everything in Apple Card and pay it off.

• 28:02Speaker 02

  Like I saw, I saw part of your thing was like to make an Excel spreadsheet and like put

• 28:10Speaker 02

  what you would pay for each of those things down.

• 28:13Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, listen. Again, I'm glad you wanna talk about trans. I don't really give a You've piqued my interest a couple times on the vagina thing, especially cuz that's just like, one, we love vaginas here. Two, I think a lot of people are curious.

• 28:28Speaker 02

  Didn't you say a lot of people, or at one of your last shows, that you were thinking that you were bi at one point?

• 28:34Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, a long time ago.

• 28:36Speaker 02

  How, how did that? What, what sparked that?

• 28:40Caleb Hammer?

  Experience with Okay, I'm asking the questions though cuz you're on my podcast.

• 28:46Speaker 02

  Sure, I was just curious when I heard that. I was like, oh, okay.

• 28:50Speaker 02

  Musician.

• 28:51Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, for fuck's sake. Okay, so if a trans part is a big part of your life, let me bring that to finances. Obviously, we're trying to budget in some future operations. What are some things you're trying to do? This was a question I tried to ask earlier that you could not answer. Let's see if you can get to it this time. What is it gonna cost? What are some things you're trying to do in the near future that we need to budget towards?

• 29:15Speaker 02

  So I, as a transsexual

• 29:19Caleb Hammer?

  We know that.

• 29:19Speaker 02

  Want

• 29:20Caleb Hammer?

  We know that.

• 29:21Speaker 02

  More surgeries.

• 29:22Caleb Hammer?

  We know that. I'm trying to ask you what they are. I just established that for you.

• 29:29Speaker 02

  I want to get a second round of facial feminization surgery.

• 29:34Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so what are you gonna do?

• 29:35Speaker 02

  I wanna go to Turkey and get my face cut up again.

• 29:38Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but what are you trying to do? To Turkey? So you have to fly to Turkey?

• 29:41Speaker 02

  Well, Turkey's-

• 29:42Caleb Hammer?

  What are they gonna do? Like, what's gonna happen?

• 29:43Speaker 02

  Well, I wanna get... Well, you've noticed the angular-

• 29:48Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you have a man jaw.

• 29:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, exactly. I wanna get rid of more of that, even though I already... Like, you saw it before.

• 29:54Caleb Hammer?

  Man jaws are hard to get rid of.

• 29:55Speaker 02

  I know.

• 29:55Caleb Hammer?

  They're very manly.

• 29:59Speaker 02

  And then I also wanna get more of a Barbie nose.

• 30:02Caleb Hammer?

  Turn to your side.

• 30:03Speaker 02

  To my side.

• 30:04Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, turn to your side. Let me look at your nose. You have a good nose. What the [__] is wrong with you?

• 30:08Speaker 02

  Not good enough.

• 30:09Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my goodness. Okay, so what-

• 30:11Speaker 02

  Also, also, I wanna get a BBL in Turkey.

• 30:16Caleb Hammer?

  Alright, give us a twirl.

• 30:22Speaker 02

  Give you a twirl?

• 30:23Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, give us a twirl. I'm objectifying you right now. Come on.

• 30:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, I see that. Well, I came on this show, I guess, for that.

• 30:32Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you need one. Okay, sit down. Yes, okay, I got it.

• 30:36Speaker 02

  That was embarrassing and all.

• 30:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so what is this BBL gonna cost? The obviously crucial one here, cuz your ass is a sad excuse.

• 30:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know. Thank you. Um, it's gonna cost like twenty-three, twenty-five.

• 30:52Caleb Hammer?

  Twenty-five what?

• 30:53Speaker 02

  Thousand.

• 30:55Caleb Hammer?

  The nose one, [__] that. You have a good nose. The jaw one, cuz you look like a man.

• 31:07Caleb Hammer?

  So what does that get us to? About forty?

• 31:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, around there.

• 31:10Caleb Hammer?

  Forty thousand? For your income? That's crazy. How are you paying for that? Cuz no insurance, right? That's out of pocket.

• 31:16Speaker 02

  That's out of pocket.

• 31:17Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck are you paying for that?

• 31:19Speaker 02

  I mean, I haven't paid for it yet, but-

• 31:22Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 31:22Speaker 02

  I'm on to.

• 31:24Caleb Hammer?

  No shit. I'm asking, how are you paying? My, the answer to how are you doing this isn't, "I haven't done it yet." Are you, what is wrong with you? You can, you've never been on a podcast.

• 31:34Speaker 02

  I have.

• 31:35Caleb Hammer?

  What? What? Cause no one who comes on the show has ever been on a podcast. You're telling me you've been on a podcast and somehow you are like this?

• 31:43Speaker 02

  Yeah. I mean, yeah, I guess.

• 31:46Caleb Hammer?

  What podcasts have you been on?

• 31:48Speaker 02

  Um, I've been on some podcasts with some friends.

• 31:51Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh, there it is.

• 31:52Speaker 02

  A lot in the trans community.

• 31:54Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh, okay. So, very good.

• 31:57Speaker 02

  They're my friends!

• 31:58Caleb Hammer?

  How'd? Okay?

• 32:00Speaker 02

  Well, I said friends and then you're like, "Uh huh." And I'm like, "Yeah."

• 32:03Caleb Hammer?

  No, that explains why you haven't actually done any real podcast.

• 32:06Speaker 02

  Oh, right, not something as popular as this, no.

• 32:09Caleb Hammer?

  You got there, you figured it out.

• 32:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:11Caleb Hammer?

  I do explain, but you did it. All by yourself.

• 32:16Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, okay, so...

• 32:19Speaker 02

  I just, I really just didn't want to, I wanted to come on here because I didn't want you to put me in the same category as all these other trans people that come on here.

• 32:28Caleb Hammer?

  I don't put people in categories. I'm putting you in the category because you're literally... I haven't put anyone in any category. Usually it's financial up. What category am I putting them in?

• 32:41Speaker 02

  This is financial what?

• 32:44Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 32:45Speaker 02

  So this is financial not up?

• 32:59Caleb Hammer?

  What category have I put them in?

• 33:03Speaker 02

  Like, trans people?

• 33:04Caleb Hammer?

  You just said I put them on...

• 33:09Caleb Hammer?

  You just said I put them all in a category. And you don't want me to put them in the, you in the same category. What category have I put them in?

• 33:16Speaker 02

  Oh, okay, I got you.

• 33:20Speaker 02

  We got there. We got there.

• 33:24Caleb Hammer?

  You taught at a school.

• 33:25Speaker 02

  I know. I taught children. Music, though.

• 33:31Caleb Hammer?

  What category?

• 33:32Speaker 02

  I've lived, started, trans.

• 33:40Caleb Hammer?

  I don't believe that I've done that, but okay.

• 33:43Speaker 02

  This is from what I've seen.

• 33:45Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not putting you in libtard, I'm putting you in.

• 33:49Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 33:49Caleb Hammer?

  I've already established that.

• 33:50Speaker 02

  Thank you. No, I know. I could see that. I could see.

• 33:53Speaker 01

  This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome? That's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration blog, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses setup required. Compatibility and availability varies. 18+.

• 34:18Speaker 02

  See that?

• 34:20Speaker 02

  It's a, yeah.

• 34:24Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy.

• 34:25Speaker 02

  Back to Turkey.

• 34:26Caleb Hammer?

  And then flights and hotels.

• 34:28Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 34:29Caleb Hammer?

  And food.

• 34:29Speaker 02

  Yes, it's expensive.

• 34:30Caleb Hammer?

  So how did you plan on paying for this when the only thing you could tell me about your financial life is, "I put money in my Applecart and I pay it off"? So how do you plan on paying for it? Please, please, please, please?

• 34:43Speaker 02

  Hopefully budgeting when I figure this out.

• 34:46Caleb Hammer?

  So no plan? So no plan?

• 34:48Speaker 02

  No.

• 34:48Caleb Hammer?

  How do you plan on figuring this out then? Because you said planning on budgeting after you figure this out. How'd you plan on figuring this out?

• 34:53Speaker 02

  Taking the extra money that I don't use from what I, when I get paid and then.

• 34:58Caleb Hammer?

  Reminder, 9,000 went out, 5,000 came in, so.

• 35:02Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:03Caleb Hammer?

  Correct that. So how do you plan on doing that?

• 35:09Speaker 02

  Um.

• 35:12Speaker 02

  9,000 usually doesn't come out, though. It's not.

• 35:14Caleb Hammer?

  What did you just say?

• 35:15Speaker 02

  9,000 doesn't usually come out.

• 35:18Speaker 02

  Every month.

• 35:19Caleb Hammer?

  How do you know that? You thought you made $1,500 less than you do. You thought you spent $500 more than your rent.

• 35:28Caleb Hammer?

  How can you say 9,000 doesn't usually go out? How can you possibly say that? How can you be a reliable narrator for that in any way whatsoever? Please. Inform me.

• 35:41Speaker 02

  I can see where it's coming from, however, I.

• 35:46Speaker 02

  I, uh, don't. I have never, I don't think I've seen that, like as a summary in my bank statement.

• 35:57Speaker 02

  Like, that never really threw me off.

• 35:59Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and you get some extra money being a professional singer as well, right? So that'll help.

• 36:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:05Caleb Hammer?

  Tell me about that.

• 36:07Speaker 02

  I mean, people hire me for funerals, weddings.

• 36:10Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 36:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:12Caleb Hammer?

  Tell me about that.

• 36:13Speaker 02

  And like how much I make?

• 36:14Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, because I just because I just said you make money doing that, and then I said, tell me about that. And then you didn't tell me about that. Because you are certified actually both, I believe we uploaded before we uploaded you Financial Audit's most guest. Unfortunately, they have already been superseded. Now I'm it's rubbing off.

• 36:35Speaker 02

  It's rubbing off. At least it's not the trans thing.

• 36:41Speaker 02

  That's not rubbing off, is it?

• 36:43Caleb Hammer?

  No, I've never had a desire to be a woman.

• 36:46Speaker 02

  Thank God. Good for you. That must be nice.

• 36:49Caleb Hammer?

  It is, I think, I guess.

• 36:51Speaker 02

  Be nice to be comfortable on your own skin.

• 36:53Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, why'd you freak out and go all woman?

• 36:57Speaker 02

  My dysphoria?

• 36:58Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 36:58Speaker 02

  Having gender dysphoria from a young age?

• 37:01Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 37:01Speaker 02

  How do I, oh my God.

• 37:02Caleb Hammer?

  Because we're getting in a lot of people, surprisingly, even on Lib Talk

• 37:08Caleb Hammer?

  that are saying like, why are all my trans friends de-transitioning?

• 37:11Speaker 02

  Yes, because they transitioned for the wrong reasons.

• 37:14Caleb Hammer?

  What reason was that?

• 37:15Speaker 02

  Exactly. What reason is it? Mine, I can speak to because I had gender dysphoria from childhood.

• 37:22Caleb Hammer?

  And what was the reason that who de-transitioned?

• 37:25Speaker 02

  Well, because they transitioned because their friends did, and it was the social thing because of trans TikTok and trans trenders.

• 37:32Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 37:37Speaker 02

  And that's why I wanted to be different.

• 37:38Caleb Hammer?

  How much is she making the side gig of singing?

• 37:41Speaker 02

  Oh, that's not, that's not that consistent, but it's like $300, $500.

• 37:45Caleb Hammer?

  Sing me a song.

• 37:48Speaker 02

  What song?

• 37:50Caleb Hammer?

  I like Sabrina Carpenter.

• 37:52Speaker 02

  Okay, so just

• 37:55Caleb Hammer?

  Go in.

• 37:56Speaker 02

  Please, please, please don't prove I'm right. Can I even do that? Like copyright? I don't know.

• 38:07Caleb Hammer?

  Keep going.

• 38:09Speaker 02

  That's the only one I can think of at the moment.

• 38:11Caleb Hammer?

  There's more to that song.

• 38:12Speaker 02

  I know.

• 38:14Caleb Hammer?

  Sing something else you know.

• 38:15Speaker 02

  One thing, my ego's another. I'm begging you, don't miss me, mother.

• 38:24Caleb Hammer?

  And what do you make from that?

• 38:25Speaker 02

  That's $300 or $500, depending on how many songs.

• 38:29Caleb Hammer?

  For what kind of events? Funerals? That happens at a funeral?

• 38:32Speaker 02

  No, not, not to breed a carpenter of funerals, no. It's more like...

• 38:37Caleb Hammer?

  Ave Maria?

• 38:38Speaker 02

  Yes. Oh, you want me to sing Ave Maria? My gosh.

• 38:48Speaker 02

  Ave Maria. Gracia plena. Maria gracia plena. Maria gracia plena.

• 39:23Caleb Hammer?

  What's with the weird pauses?

• 39:25Speaker 02

  Uh, probably not getting the right breath control. I'm nervous.

• 39:30Caleb Hammer?

  It's like when your tone breaks up, you all of a sudden...

• 39:33Speaker 02

  Yeah. Um, yeah, that's...

• 39:37Caleb Hammer?

  People pay for that.

• 39:38Speaker 02

  Well, it's, okay...

• 39:39Caleb Hammer?

  Pause and all.

• 39:40Speaker 02

  Usually I'm better warmed up than... I wasn't expecting to sing.

• 39:48Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so we can't...

• 39:50Speaker 02

  I really wasn't.

• 39:51Caleb Hammer?

  We can't put any projected income on that?

• 39:54Speaker 02

  I wouldn't, no. It's more of a side thing, it's not consistent.

• 39:57Caleb Hammer?

  So men, straight men?

• 40:00Speaker 02

  Ye- yeah, yes.

• 40:01Caleb Hammer?

  I have to ask the curious questions in between here and there.

• 40:03Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 40:04Caleb Hammer?

  Keep my curiosity going.

• 40:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:06Caleb Hammer?

  How often does a straight man uniquely [BLEEP] you?

• 40:09Speaker 02

  Uh, how often?

• 40:11Caleb Hammer?

  Like someone who's not coming back for seconds?

• 40:13Speaker 02

  It's usually, I don't continue it.

• 40:18Caleb Hammer?

  So how often does a unique person like?

• 40:23Speaker 02

  A unique person? I don't.

• 40:26Caleb Hammer?

  Like someone that you haven't slept with. How frequently do you? A straight guy, straight, not bi, not gay.

• 40:32Speaker 02

  No, I prefer straight men.

• 40:33Caleb Hammer?

  I know you do.

• 40:34Speaker 02

  Not a lot, not like frequently, not like two to three a month.

• 40:41Caleb Hammer?

  So one to two?

• 40:42Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 40:43Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Good, good for them. And they do it. No questions, no flaws?

• 40:47Speaker 02

  No.

• 40:48Caleb Hammer?

  They don't, they're not even like curious.

• 40:50Speaker 02

  Not usually.

• 40:52Caleb Hammer?

  Do they know?

• 40:54Speaker 02

  Yes. Oh, yes.

• 40:55Caleb Hammer?

  And they want that?

• 40:57Speaker 02

  Consent, yeah. Yes. Cause I'm not about.

• 41:08Caleb Hammer?

  Alright, he would. Congratulations, we'll get you guys a room.

• 41:12Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 41:12Caleb Hammer?

  Afterwards.

• 41:13Speaker 02

  Um, I'm not about not disclosing, because I'm not about.

• 41:17Caleb Hammer?

  And would you give him a wood?

• 41:19Speaker 02

  Absolutely.

• 41:23Speaker 02

  That's why I have this.

• 41:26Speaker 02

  Cherry slushy, because he recommended that one.

• 41:29Caleb Hammer?

  It is very good.

• 41:30Speaker 02

  It is good.

• 41:33Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, good. We got that taken care of.

• 41:38Caleb Hammer?

  Well done. Let me know how it is. I'm genuinely curious.

• 41:42Speaker 02

  Oh, God.

• 41:43Caleb Hammer?

  I'm just, none of us have like experienced that before, so. Yeah, you're a pioneer.

• 41:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, very good. What do you think your financial score is? Zero to 10, zero being the worst, 10 being the best?

• 41:55Speaker 02

  Zero.

• 41:57Caleb Hammer?

  Alright, if you want your financial score, take the assessment at Calebhammer.com. It is free and it just takes a few minutes to see where you stand in the world of money, where you need to do better, or where you're doing really well already, and what you need to do to improve. Calebhammer.com. And if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on this show, one, don't transition, two.

• 42:18Caleb Hammer?

  Download the Dollar Wise Budgeting App. Take the free trial to see if you like it. New features being added every single month. At the time of this being uploaded, by the way, our whole new refresh, all bunch of new features should be added. And most people take the annual version once the free trial ends because it saves a lot of money, like 50%. And you get my budget friendly cookbook signed by me mailed directly to you. Check that out. All those links are in the description below. Let's jump into these numbers. Oh my goodness.

• 42:43Speaker 00

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• 43:09Caleb Hammer?

  Haven't only, so we need to add that income too.

• 43:12Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no. Not, it's not significant. It's peanuts.

• 43:20Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 43:20Speaker 02

  Like $7, $14.

• 43:23Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 43:24Speaker 02

  It's not significant.

• 43:26Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. But can I add the singing? You get a gig a month on average?

• 43:31Speaker 02

  No, I just, just do manager income.

• 43:36Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. I'll do just manager income. Well, look what's on top. The infamous Apple Card, the only thing you know about your life.

• 43:44Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 43:45Caleb Hammer?

  Outside of you being trans.

• 43:47Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 43:47Caleb Hammer?

  Cause that's what you've wrapped your entire world around, the entirety of your life.

• 43:51Speaker 02

  Don't say that.

• 43:52Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you're literally able to talk about nothing outside of it.

• 43:55Speaker 02

  No, that's just.

• 43:56Caleb Hammer?

  About you.

• 43:57Speaker 02

  Well, not, well.

• 44:00Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 44:00Speaker 02

  Not really.

• 44:01Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 44:01Speaker 02

  Talked about how I'm a singer and it was a teacher.

• 44:04Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, Colton told me you're also trying to budget and becoming, buying a shit ton of equipment to become a Twitch streamer.

• 44:11Speaker 02

  I did do, I did do.

• 44:12Caleb Hammer?

  You already did?

• 44:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:13Caleb Hammer?

  But, but he says, but, but, but also you have to buy a new computer. Why, so we have to budget in 40,000 hours for this trip and then you're gonna get, you're gonna get all this equipment to do Twitch?

• 44:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:25Caleb Hammer?

  That's kind of stupid, I'll be honest, but what's not is actually getting a checking account that gives you free money. Free money, we like free money. You can get up to $350 in bonus cash right now when you sign up for the checking account that I use, Chime. Also, it makes your savings grow at a 3.5 APY interest rate. Guys, you can watch Financial Audit and get free money at the same time. Who would have thought? That's incredible. Check it out, link in the description below. Sign up for Chime, get that $350 right now in your checking account. Starbucks is bullsh** and a waste of money, and you already know that, by making your coffee at home and investing the rest. So now, you need to do that with your energy drink as well.

• 45:10Caleb Hammer?

  Make Gamer Subs at home for just 40 cents a serving. Honestly, it literally tastes better, and we proved this accidentally via a blind taste test in our Hammer Elite show, Fat and Fatter. The number one ranked energy drink is Gamer Subs. Literally, the cherry flavor is insane. Listen, you can also get free samples to see if you like it, or 10% off your order at gamersubs.gg, or click that link in the description below, type in code CALEB. How much is that gonna cost? What are you getting, Ben?

• 45:40Speaker 02

  I got about, I don't know, about 25, 3,000 for that. I'm gonna need, that's more realistic than the whole surgery thing on the horizon.

• 45:54Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but I don't understand, if you're spending more money than you make, well, so is the surgery happening or not? Because, listen, I'll budget for whatever people want to do. When people have bad reasons for leaving the country, I still will make a plan for them to do it. If you're budgeting to get a chin and a butt, or no chin and a butt, I will do it. But is it happening or not? You tell me.

• 46:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's gonna happen.

• 46:15Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so we're doing that, but this doesn't make sense if all of a sudden, we have to upgrade our gaming equipment, we have to do this, we do this. It doesn't get there.

• 46:22Speaker 02

  But I'm thinking in terms of the fact that it's a smaller amount, therefore that's gonna come before the surgery.

• 46:26Caleb Hammer?

  But that takes, but every amount saved to get to the surgery gets immediately drained every time we hit this, these little goals along the way.

• 46:34Speaker 02

  Right.

• 46:34Caleb Hammer?

  So you don't ever get to the big goal. So that doesn't make sense. What's more important, Twitch or butt?

• 46:40Speaker 02

  Well, ugh, that's a good question.

• 46:45Speaker 02

  More important or cuz then if I did Twitch, I could make, I could make more money.

• 46:50Caleb Hammer?

  He just, well, yeah, okay, maybe. You ain't, you know, you ain't no. Sina, my new crush. I love Sina. Can I just say? She's like, my goodness, I'm obsessed.

• 47:00Speaker 02

  Who?

• 47:00Caleb Hammer?

  Like, who? And Pokemon, also my wife. Oh, my goodness. Those, those two, listen, I just. Both of them. I'm proposing to both of you right now.

• 47:11Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 47:12Caleb Hammer?

  But you ain't them, girl.

• 47:14Speaker 02

  I know. I haven't started.

• 47:18Caleb Hammer?

  You said you did in the past.

• 47:19Speaker 02

  I know, but like.

• 47:19Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, Colton tell me you literally sleep in your living room so that you can make your bedroom your Twitch room.

• 47:23Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 47:24Caleb Hammer?

  So clearly you're prioritizing that.

• 47:25Speaker 02

  I am.

• 47:26Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think you're gonna make money, though. I mean, Brandon and Tyler do pretty well cuz they have the connection to this show on their Twitches. They still don't make like money, like livable money, money that'll go towards goals. It's like extra help.

• 47:38Speaker 02

  Brandon does Twitch?

• 47:39Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, and he actually has a platform unlike you.

• 47:42Speaker 02

  That's true. That's true.

• 47:44Caleb Hammer?

  And he still does, just halfway decent. It's more like passion. I assume. Yeah. Uh, like 500 bucks a month. What is getting?

• 47:54Speaker 02

  At least, yeah, at least you can quantify it and put it.

• 47:56Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but he's grinding on it, like most every day. And you just see, and then, and this is, this makes no sense cuz you can't start your 401k, so you have to spend on your hobbies. And then you just paid 8,000 dollars for laser hair removal. So how do we ever get to these goals if you're just blowing thousands on bullshit along the way? This doesn't make sense. 8,000, how'd you pay for 8,000?

• 48:16Speaker 02

  It's not bullshit.

• 48:18Caleb Hammer?

  Depending. If you're trying to get to the big goal, anything that is a want that takes us away from that big goal is bullshit in my head. You had to do the 8,000 for laser hair?

• 48:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:28Caleb Hammer?

  Why? Shave.

• 48:30Speaker 02

  You, no, no, no, no.

• 48:31Caleb Hammer?

  Laser hair is great, trust me. Oh, I funded it for my girlfriend. Don't get me wrong.

• 48:35Speaker 02

  Right. So.

• 48:38Caleb Hammer?

  But you're trying to get to the butt. You're trying to get to the no chin.

• 48:41Speaker 02

  But electrolysis, okay, so before I could have my bottom surgery, I had to get electrolysis, so I had to get all the hair moved.

• 48:48Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, for, how'd you even buy that? How'd you afford that? 8,000? This makes no sense.

• 48:53Speaker 02

  Well, that was part of the.

• 48:55Caleb Hammer?

  A 401k?

• 48:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:56Caleb Hammer?

  401k, so our retirement's gone for the sake of not having hair?

• 48:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, so I could have the bottom surgery.

• 49:04Speaker 02

  The things we do.

• 49:06Caleb Hammer?

  Was it big?

• 49:08Speaker 02

  Oh, God. Um, I don't know. Think I don't think so, no.

• 49:13Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, OK, then it's fine. Wasn't benefiting the world. OK. Wasn't contributing much.

• 49:21Caleb Hammer?

  What, you're offended by the thing you wanted to get rid of?

• 49:24Speaker 02

  I just never thought of it in that way. So it's just kind of like, what?

• 49:29Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, you gotta do some math in the end. Everything's quanti- quantifiable.

• 49:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I never thought of it as impacting the world. Well, sure, I guess. I don't know. I just never thought of it that way.

• 49:41Caleb Hammer?

  Never measured it?

• 49:42Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no. God, no.

• 49:44Caleb Hammer?

  You looked at it with you?

• 49:45Speaker 02

  This, yes, exactly. It makes you uncomfortable. Yes.

• 49:49Caleb Hammer?

  You never jacked off?

• 49:50Speaker 02

  No.

• 49:51Caleb Hammer?

  Whoa, Mark just freaked out. He's the, he is the, he, he jacks off like a professional.

• 49:57Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 50:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's, yeah. I've never thought of it in the way that you think.

• 50:05Caleb Hammer?

  Feeling like an emergency to pull your 401k out. I can like, I can see why it feels that way.

• 50:11Speaker 02

  See, this was more of an emergency than getting a bigger.

• 50:15Caleb Hammer?

  I can understand. You looked at your and you vomited. It's, you know, I can't relate, but.

• 50:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:20Caleb Hammer?

  I look at mine and I come.

• 50:24Speaker 02

  That's OK.

• 50:25Caleb Hammer?

  I'm easy.

• 50:26Speaker 02

  All right. Did not know that about you. After all these episodes, I should have known these.

• 50:30Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, now you know. Now you know. Now everyone knows. I just look at, oh, just did it.

• 50:36Caleb Hammer?

  I'm an easy one.

• 50:37Speaker 02

  All right.

• 50:39Caleb Hammer?

  OK. Apple card. So I, I usually, this is usually where I ask, what's going on here? But I, I'm, the answer is gonna be, I put money on it and I, uh, pay it off. Is there anything else?

• 50:51Speaker 02

  That is, that's, that's it. I put, I charged it and I paid off the end of the week.

• 50:57Caleb Hammer?

  You pay it off every single time, so it never accrues interest.

• 51:00Speaker 02

  Yes, because the interest is pretty high.

• 51:03Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness. The spending on here is insane. Oh, my absolute goodness, what are you doing? What are you doing? That's a lie. You had a thousand hours in interest charged. You're a liar. You don't know what you're doing.

• 51:24Caleb Hammer?

  There's a thousand dollars in interest charged. Well, almost rounded up. What the are you talking about? Pay it off every week? No, you do not. No, you absolutely do not. So I am marking this as a debt. You moron. You couldn't tell me how much money you make. You couldn't tell me how much money you spent. Now you're gonna tell me that you pay this off every week while you've accrued a thousand dollars in interest for 2025? No, you. This makes no sense. You have no idea what you're doing. You're confused on your gender. You're confused on your numbers. You're confused on everything. And I love that for you, except for the numbers part.

• 52:01Speaker 02

  You love that for me? Oh, thank you.

• 52:02Caleb Hammer?

  The gender part, yeah, be confused. It's okay.

• 52:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 52:05Caleb Hammer?

  Or dysphoric or whatever it is, right?

• 52:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, well, I mean, yes, gender dysphoria. You had someone on here that had yellow hair. Um, that said dysmorphia.

• 52:15Caleb Hammer?

  Great real tits.

• 52:17Speaker 02

  Were they great? Cause they wanted bigger ones.

• 52:22Caleb Hammer?

  No, wanted them lifted. Cause those things had gravity.

• 52:25Speaker 02

  Okay. Interesting. Okay.

• 52:29Caleb Hammer?

  You could only dream.

• 52:30Speaker 02

  It's true.

• 52:31Caleb Hammer?

  So $25 minimum payment with a balance of $2,159.32. 13 years to pay off if we make minimum payments only. And I know you put more than that, but then you spend more and then interest accrues. I think you just don't put enough towards it to actually pay it off like the way you did think you do. And then interest accrues like crazy. And I know you spend money like crazy. I'm being told right now you bought four new outfits for this show.

• 52:55Speaker 02

  I did.

• 52:56Caleb Hammer?

  For this filming.

• 52:57Speaker 02

  I did.

• 52:57Caleb Hammer?

  We don't do multiple outfits. You wear one.

• 52:59Speaker 02

  I know.

• 53:00Caleb Hammer?

  You have never seen anyone change in the show's history.

• 53:02Speaker 02

  I know. And it was just because I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. And then you know what the best part is? And this is sarcasm. I'm not wearing any of the outfits that I bought.

• 53:10Caleb Hammer?

  You're why? Why?

• 53:12Speaker 02

  Cause it's just what I thought I was gonna like when I put it on and I didn't.

• 53:18Caleb Hammer?

  See, you spent uncontrollably. You got a 100 inch TV for your living room.

• 53:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:24Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you? You go absolutely crazy. You buy for your Instagram, for the holidays, for everything. And then this is on this credit card that is a Korean interest like crazy. You are pages of spending. You're uncontrollable. Your financial life isn't defined. I spent on an Apple kind of pay off. No, you don't, you dumb broad. I can say that. See, I'm being, I'm being, I'm being good. Yeah, you're being, I'm being a good guy.

• 53:49Speaker 02

  You could say worse things too.

• 53:51Caleb Hammer?

  She's a broad. She's a, she's a, she is a, what are other woman names?

• 53:58Speaker 02

  Keep going.

• 53:58Caleb Hammer?

  Slut, whore, hoe.

• 54:00Speaker 02

  There you go.

• 54:01Caleb Hammer?

  We got any other bangers for women?

• 54:03Speaker 02

  You're missing the obvious one.

• 54:04Caleb Hammer?

  For women?

• 54:05Speaker 02

  No.

• 54:06Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I'm doing the women thing because I'm, I'm being, I'm being appropriate to your

• 54:11Speaker 02

  Boo.

• 54:11Caleb Hammer?

  identification. There's another one?

• 54:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 54:14Caleb Hammer?

  What is it? I don't know. I thought I was an expert in slurs. I say them in my sleep.

• 54:20Caleb Hammer?

  What is the good slur I'm missing?

• 54:21Speaker 02

  The one that you started off saying that you weren't gonna say.

• 54:23Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, I'm not gonna say the F word. I'm not rude like that.

• 54:27Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 54:28Caleb Hammer?

  Usually.

• 54:28Speaker 02

  That's fine. Usually.

• 54:30Caleb Hammer?

  Cause I don't say it to real ones. I just say it to my friends when they're acting like.

• 54:38Speaker 02

  We did it. We got there. So proud of you. But I'm, great. Fantastic. Okay. I'm so glad we got there.

• 54:49Caleb Hammer?

  But I would never call you that.

• 54:50Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 54:51Caleb Hammer?

  It's like I would never call Tyler boy. I would never, I, I would,

• 55:00Caleb Hammer?

  I would never, I would never call Colton gay. No, I don't. You are, but I don't. It's still saying it.

• 55:08Speaker 02

  I know. It's terrible.

• 55:09Caleb Hammer?

  Starbucks, Starbucks. So you already work at a store. Just make your coffee at home. Make your, that one right there, the energy drink? You're not buying energy drinks anymore. If you buy energy drinks here. You, well, we already know you are, but that's okay.

• 55:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:23Caleb Hammer?

  Gamer subs, you are getting gamer subs. Those are the free samples. You can get the free samples right now. Use code Caleb at gamersubs.gg. Links in the description below, but also it's 40 cents a serving. You're making it at home. You're making coffee at home. Why are you buying at Starbucks? It's so stupid. Starbucks, Starbucks, Southwest, Culvers, Chipotle, Popmart. Popmart for what?

• 55:46Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, you're La Boo Booing. You're Boo Booing. Why are you You're past the trend. La Boo Boo's done.

• 55:52Speaker 02

  I know. This is not new.

• 55:54Caleb Hammer?

  La Boo Boo's done. Transitioning's done. You're past the trend. That was all COVID, girl. You're done.

• 56:00Speaker 02

  How much Popmart's on there?

• 56:02Caleb Hammer?

  Well, there's one. And then Papa Murphy's. And, oh, Popmart, Popmart, Popmart. What are you doing? What is wrong with you? It is not funny. It is not cute. You're up your life. What is wrong with you? You don't know how to manage your finances. You think you're not paying interest on here, but you are. And then you're spending a La Boo Boo's. Every second of your life, fuck trans La Boobs.

• 56:24Speaker 02

  Trans La Boobs?

• 56:26Caleb Hammer?

  Why? You're throwing everything away for Popmart. What the fuck is wrong with you?

• 56:31Speaker 02

  I, I was originally given a bunch of La Boo Boo's because I made fun of it with the people that I worked with. They gave it to me like as a gift. And I was like, oh no, I can't make fun of it. And then I got them stolen. So I had to rebuy them.

• 56:45Caleb Hammer?

  A gift? You didn't have to rebuy a gift. This is gone. The gift's gone.

• 56:49Speaker 02

  I know. I didn't. And I wanted to have that still.

• 56:53Caleb Hammer?

  Don't you want to? First of all, you already took from your retirement. We need to get your retirement caught up. Because even if you're trans, you still gotta retire.

• 57:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know. Yeah, I know.

• 57:00Caleb Hammer?

  Like, you don't get to not retire anymore.

• 57:02Speaker 02

  Right.

• 57:03Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, I don't know. Minnesota might give you an endless like amount of money for the rest of your life because you're trans. Who knows? Maybe that'll happen at retirement. But.

• 57:13Speaker 02

  Just hang out in Minnesota.

• 57:14Caleb Hammer?

  Let's rely that doesn't happen. Let's rely on that not happening. You need to retire. You pulled it to retirement. You think you're going to Popmart every five seconds of your life? Would you are? Fuck you. What's wrong with you? Starbucks, again. Going in, getting some bullshit. Amazon.

• 57:29Speaker 02

  No tequilas.

• 57:30Caleb Hammer?

  Whole other page. Yeah, you're in Minnesota.

• 57:33Speaker 02

  They don't have tequilas?

• 57:34Caleb Hammer?

  Starbucks. I don't know. I don't care.

• 57:36Speaker 02

  Okay, I was like, what?

• 57:37Caleb Hammer?

  Nail spa. Let me see.

• 57:42Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, that's rough.

• 57:43Speaker 02

  Is it? Oh my god, no!

• 57:45Caleb Hammer?

  That's bad times.

• 57:47Speaker 02

  Why?

• 57:48Caleb Hammer?

  Cause those are like [bleep] gluons.

• 57:50Speaker 02

  They're not. They're real. Oh, oh no.

• 57:55Caleb Hammer?

  You got scammed.

• 57:56Speaker 02

  Oh my gosh, I can't tell my nail lady.

• 57:58Caleb Hammer?

  It's cause you got the wrong minorities. See, we got the Asians here. And they do it great. You went to the Somalians. Netflix. Amazon, Amazon, Kickoff Inc.

• 58:12Speaker 02

  Thank you to you.

• 58:13Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 58:14Speaker 02

  Thanks to you.

• 58:15Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, it's Kickoff, okay.

• 58:16Speaker 02

  Use your code and everything.

• 58:17Caleb Hammer?

  Well, that's good. Apple Bill. I mean, it [bleep] works.

• 58:22Speaker 02

  It does!

• 58:25Caleb Hammer?

  Uber. Southside News. What is that? You pay for it, you better know what it is.

• 58:33Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't know what that is. Southside News?

• 58:36Caleb Hammer?

  You dumb [bleep] fraud? What is it?

• 58:41Speaker 02

  I don't know!

• 58:42Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my goodness, what is wrong with you? You literally probably have a subscription to it. Every single month.

• 58:47Speaker 02

  It, mm.

• 58:47Caleb Hammer?

  For nine bucks.

• 58:48Speaker 02

  Is it, and then from New York?

• 58:51Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know. What I know? What is wrong with you? How would I know that?

• 58:55Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 58:56Caleb Hammer?

  Uber.

• 58:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, it sounds like New York.

• 58:59Caleb Hammer?

  Shellburne Soata. Oh, you went to New York?

• 59:01Speaker 02

  New York, yes.

• 59:01Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd you go to New York? You're trying to go to Afghanistan or something?

• 59:04Speaker 02

  Af- Turkey.

• 59:05Caleb Hammer?

  One of those, yeah.

• 59:06Speaker 02

  Um, I have to go to New York for, um, post-op follow-up doctor's appointment.

• 59:11Caleb Hammer?

  To observe?

• 59:12Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 59:12Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 59:15Speaker 02

  It's part of the process. I mean, you have, there's a follow-up post-op appointment.

• 59:18Caleb Hammer?

  Dude! You're telling me Minneapolis doesn't do trans surgeries out of all cities?

• 59:23Speaker 02

  They do, but-

• 59:24Caleb Hammer?

  It's Minneapolis!

• 59:25Speaker 02

  They do, but not where I went. I went to New York.

• 59:29Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I know that.

• 59:30Speaker 02

  To get the best of the best.

• 59:34Speaker 02

  Shout out to NYU.

• 59:35Caleb Hammer?

  How much did that cost? Yeah, it says, that's, yeah, okay.

• 59:39Speaker 02

  How much did that cost me? Oh, God, uh.

• 59:42Caleb Hammer?

  But then you had the travel and food. Look what you're doing while you're there.

• 59:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. I have no idea. Fifteen.

• 59:49Caleb Hammer?

  Amazon, Papa Murphy's. VidIQ, you pay for VidIQ? You [bleep] pay for VidIQ? Who the [bleep] pays for VidIQ?

• 59:59Speaker 02

  There's a guy that I was seeing that was helping me edit my videos when I was doing YouTube.

• 1:00:04Caleb Hammer?

  You were seeing him for his skills?

• 1:00:06Speaker 02

  No, no, no, that was just on the side.

• 1:00:08Caleb Hammer?

  Let me see what this man looked like. I need to see what someone looks like that sticks it in.

• 1:00:11Speaker 02

  I don't have.

• 1:00:13Caleb Hammer?

  You don't, you don't know who he is?

• 1:00:14Speaker 02

  I blocked him.

• 1:00:16Caleb Hammer?

  I can pull him up.

• 1:00:17Speaker 02

  But I don't remember, like.

• 1:00:19Caleb Hammer?

  You don't know his name? You do not know the name of your ex.

• 1:00:22Speaker 02

  I do.

• 1:00:24Caleb Hammer?

  Good, give it to me.

• 1:00:25Speaker 02

  But I don't know his, like, Instagram.

• 1:00:27Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, it should just be his [bleep] name, no?

• 1:00:30Speaker 02

  No, it's not, no. No, no, no.

• 1:00:32Caleb Hammer?

  His name is not his name.

• 1:00:34Speaker 02

  Not on Instagram?

• 1:00:36Caleb Hammer?

  Search his name, see if it exists.

• 1:00:40Caleb Hammer?

  Search it!

• 1:00:43Caleb Hammer?

  I know you can type even with GluOns.

• 1:00:45Speaker 02

  Oh, my gosh, that's so, I'm so offended by that.

• 1:00:51Caleb Hammer?

  You should be offended that you paid so much for it.

• 1:00:54Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah. Yeah, I mean, it is expensive.

• 1:00:57Caleb Hammer?

  So you'd pick Brandon over me?

• 1:00:59Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, sorry.

• 1:01:01Caleb Hammer?

  Damn, I'm getting cooked.

• 1:01:02Speaker 02

  I can't, I can't.

• 1:01:03Caleb Hammer?

  Getting cooked these days.

• 1:01:03Speaker 02

  Can't find it.

• 1:01:06Caleb Hammer?

  Getting cooked.

• 1:01:07Speaker 02

  I mean, you are attractive.

• 1:01:10Speaker 02

  Not, especially, oh, God, thank you for having the beard back. When you shaved that.

• 1:01:15Caleb Hammer?

  It was an accident.

• 1:01:15Speaker 02

  That was a terrible accident. It was terrible.

• 1:01:20Caleb Hammer?

  We're delayed by a month. It was an accident. I trimmed wrong and then at that point I had to commit.

• 1:01:26Speaker 02

  I mean, you didn't have to.

• 1:01:27Caleb Hammer?

  No, I had to.

• 1:01:28Speaker 02

  Was it that bad?

• 1:01:29Caleb Hammer?

  Yes!

• 1:01:29Speaker 02

  Worse than being a babyface.

• 1:01:31Caleb Hammer?

  Well, the babyface only exists for a couple of days.

• 1:01:36Caleb Hammer?

  Goes away quick with stubble.

• 1:01:39Speaker 02

  Okay, I wouldn't know.

• 1:01:40Caleb Hammer?

  More Popmart, Apple Bill, Apple Bill, Popmart, Dollar Tree, not as good as Dollar Wise. You spend money there.

• 1:01:48Speaker 02

  Dollar Tree? Oh my god.

• 1:01:52Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 1:01:53Speaker 02

  I can't, I can't remember what that was for.

• 1:01:55Caleb Hammer?

  I don't trust you to remember anything. That's why I'm no longer asking questions.

• 1:01:58Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:01:58Caleb Hammer?

  Amazon, Apple Bill, Total Wine & More. Is that why you're all [__] up?

• 1:02:02Speaker 02

  No, I promise.

• 1:02:03Caleb Hammer?

  Best Buy, Best Buy.

• 1:02:05Speaker 02

  That was for Thanksgiving. That was for Thanksgiving.

• 1:02:07Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, Best Buy was for Thanksgiving where you bought $2,000?

• 1:02:10Speaker 02

  Wine.

• 1:02:11Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, what about the $2,000 for Best Buy?

• 1:02:12Speaker 02

  That was a TV.

• 1:02:14Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my goodness.

• 1:02:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:15Caleb Hammer?

  You can't afford that. Apple Bill, pull up your phone.

• 1:02:21Caleb Hammer?

  There is no one's photos folder I'm gonna further avoid than yours.

• 1:02:25Speaker 02

  To the Apple card?

• 1:02:27Caleb Hammer?

  I'm going to snoop around on your phone, just not your photos.

• 1:02:30Speaker 02

  Sorry, sorry.

• 1:02:31Caleb Hammer?

  Freak.

• 1:02:33Caleb Hammer?

  Didn't mean that in a trans way. Don't cancel me.

• 1:02:36Speaker 02

  Eh.

• 1:02:38Speaker 02

  I've had much worse.

• 1:02:40Caleb Hammer?

  No, I mean, I don't care what people do. I really don't. People, okay, here it is. I've never seen more subscriptions on someone's phone than this.

• 1:02:47Speaker 02

  Really?

• 1:02:48Caleb Hammer?

  Really.

• 1:02:52Caleb Hammer?

  Airbrush? Catfish and everyone for $35 a month. What is wrong with you?

• 1:02:57Speaker 02

  A month?

• 1:02:58Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, okay, you got annual, but still. Catfishing everyone.

• 1:03:03Speaker 02

  Social media, social media.

• 1:03:05Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, catfish. Apple TV, it is one of the better ones. You still can't probably afford it. And then you got Face App. More catfishing. You have to double catfish? What's wrong with you?

• 1:03:14Speaker 02

  That's one of the reasons I'm hated by the trans.

• 1:03:16Caleb Hammer?

  What the [__] I use Gmail every second of my life. I don't pay for it. Do I? Not on my phone at least. You pay for-

• 1:03:22Speaker 02

  Is that annual too?

• 1:03:23Caleb Hammer?

  You got Grok.

• 1:03:25Speaker 02

  Nah, no, it's expiring. I didn't mean to.

• 1:03:27Caleb Hammer?

  Notably?

• 1:03:29Speaker 02

  Yep. For work.

• 1:03:32Caleb Hammer?

  You pay for X. Paramount Plus, out of all, come on. Paramount Plus sucks.

• 1:03:38Speaker 02

  Why?

• 1:03:39Caleb Hammer?

  And you do have Hammer Elite, the best membership on YouTube, number one for a reason, cuz we got three premium, incredible, high-quality shows posted every single day. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, including the post-show for this episode. You like it, right?

• 1:03:49Speaker 02

  Oh, love it.

• 1:03:50Caleb Hammer?

  It's so good. We, we produce, it's-

• 1:03:52Speaker 02

  This is why it's so gag.

• 1:03:53Caleb Hammer?

  It is top tier. It is the absolute best. Yes, you're gagged, but I promise you will not be getting gagged while here with anything.

• 1:04:02Caleb Hammer?

  I assume he doesn't want to. I think he gave a thumbs up for niceties.

• 1:04:10Caleb Hammer?

  And then he got premium. Okay. Oh my goodness, look at you. You got 15 snaps to reply. How many people are you sliding in? Did you got people every second of your... Look at this. What are you doing?

• 1:04:25Speaker 02

  Popular.

• 1:04:27Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, it's not there.

• 1:04:29Speaker 02

  What were you... What?

• 1:04:30Caleb Hammer?

  It's not there.

• 1:04:30Speaker 02

  What were you looking up?

• 1:04:33Caleb Hammer?

  There... Well, no, that's not downloaded either. Wait, where are you meeting people? Bumble? No! Yeah. No! You don't have anything downloaded, not even Grindr. Where are you meeting people?

• 1:04:45Speaker 02

  In person.

• 1:04:46Caleb Hammer?

  Where? At protests?

• 1:04:49Speaker 02

  Oh god, no. I thought you knew me better by now.

• 1:04:52Caleb Hammer?

  Where? Where are you meeting people?

• 1:04:53Speaker 02

  Not going to protests. And Instagram.

• 1:04:56Caleb Hammer?

  Ah, now that she said it, I know. Oh yeah, this fatty's trying to get in you. Adrian, you're not gonna land that nut. Sorry, guy.

• 1:05:09Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, but in person, where?

• 1:05:12Speaker 00

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• 1:05:38Speaker 02

  Just like, out at bars and stuff?

• 1:05:40Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so there's seven things... Oh, so they have to get drunk first?

• 1:05:42Speaker 02

  No, no, no. I prefer... I said consent first.

• 1:05:48Caleb Hammer?

  I hope so. I know Minnesota and Wisconsin are drinking states. Okay, so you got...

• 1:05:52Speaker 02

  Wisconsin for sure.

• 1:05:53Caleb Hammer?

  In the cart, you have some eye-wearing.

• 1:05:57Speaker 02

  Is that what that was? I was wondering what you were doing.

• 1:05:59Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, it's your sleep mask, and then ink cartridges, a very expensive desk, oh, multiple desks, you're considering a lot. A 49-inch, like, triple-wide monitor. It's kinda crazy.

• 1:06:11Speaker 02

  It is, it is, yeah.

• 1:06:13Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you're not buying this shit. Unless that's what you're prioritizing, but we just can't do the rest. Okay, you just ordered some ink, some pens, some... Something's being delivered today. They can't even figure that out. Utensil trays, gardening knee pads. I'm sure you get on your knees a lot. Sharpie retractable permanent markers and other computer. You just got a computer desk, literally a couple of weeks ago.

• 1:06:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's for the living room.

• 1:06:38Caleb Hammer?

  Why are you looking for another? Why do you need a desk for your living room and bedroom?

• 1:06:41Speaker 02

  Because one's for the gaming setup. No one's not.

• 1:06:45Caleb Hammer?

  I hate you. Laptop sleeve cover, more pens. You get more pens than anyone I've ever.

• 1:06:50Speaker 02

  It's for work.

• 1:06:54Caleb Hammer?

  At the coffee shop?

• 1:06:55Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:06:56Caleb Hammer?

  You just got a pop-up from Only.

• 1:06:59Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:07:00Caleb Hammer?

  The posting reminder.

• 1:07:01Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:07:02Caleb Hammer?

  You haven't posted since, it says 22 days.

• 1:07:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:07:07Caleb Hammer?

  22 days.

• 1:07:09Speaker 02

  But I said I'm not, I'm not active on it.

• 1:07:11Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and then canceled and HR pharma one-shot sterile lubrication, something. For what? What is that? That's what you have to, you have to inject that so that you cream?

• 1:07:20Speaker 02

  Not inject it. It's, but you put it on the dilator and then it's.

• 1:07:25Caleb Hammer?

  So you don't get wet?

• 1:07:27Speaker 02

  No, you do, but it's.

• 1:07:28Caleb Hammer?

  But you have to put something in there to get wet?

• 1:07:30Speaker 02

  Because it's a surgical equipment.

• 1:07:32Caleb Hammer?

  You don't get wet. Your body naturally.

• 1:07:34Speaker 02

  Yes, it does.

• 1:07:35Caleb Hammer?

  What? Then what's this for?

• 1:07:36Speaker 02

  But you need more. You need more lubrication, for sure. It's because it's a medical instrument.

• 1:07:42Caleb Hammer?

  So you don't get wet enough?

• 1:07:44Speaker 02

  Not for a medical device.

• 1:07:46Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, why are you getting so many of these? Because you got a couple.

• 1:07:49Speaker 02

  I, I have to go through it.

• 1:07:52Caleb Hammer?

  For, for what? What is this?

• 1:07:53Speaker 02

  So, once you get the surgery down there, you have to dilate. Yeah, bottom surgery.

• 1:07:58Caleb Hammer?

  You have to dilate how often?

• 1:07:59Speaker 02

  Twice a day.

• 1:08:02Caleb Hammer?

  For why? Forever?

• 1:08:03Speaker 02

  To, yeah, to keep. No, not forever. No, no. For the first year. For the first year.

• 1:08:07Caleb Hammer?

  For what?

• 1:08:08Speaker 02

  To keep the surgery from closing.

• 1:08:12Caleb Hammer?

  It'll, it'll, it'll close?

• 1:08:14Speaker 02

  For the first year.

• 1:08:15Caleb Hammer?

  It'll close? Your vagina will close?

• 1:08:17Speaker 02

  The body treats it like an open wound for the first year.

• 1:08:22Caleb Hammer?

  You have a clit?

• 1:08:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:25Caleb Hammer?

  And that was?

• 1:08:28Speaker 02

  The tip.

• 1:08:30Caleb Hammer?

  Whoa.

• 1:08:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:32Caleb Hammer?

  Whoa, that's crazy.

• 1:08:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:35Caleb Hammer?

  Your tip is now your clit?

• 1:08:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:37Caleb Hammer?

  Definitely not as much sensation as a clit?

• 1:08:40Speaker 02

  Probably, I mean-

• 1:08:40Caleb Hammer?

  No, not even close.

• 1:08:42Speaker 02

  I can't speak to that.

• 1:08:43Caleb Hammer?

  Just nerve endings, it's not even close.

• 1:08:45Speaker 02

  Right.

• 1:08:46Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so who here is trying to slide in your DMs? Ryan, is he?

• 1:08:48Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:08:49Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, Ally?

• 1:08:50Speaker 02

  No, these are all just friends from work.

• 1:08:52Caleb Hammer?

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• 1:09:34Caleb Hammer?

  for people who don't have any previous experience or degrees. Their courses teach you everything you need to know to land your first entry-level job. And they have a 100% free introductory course for each career that teaches you all about what the job is like, how much money you'd make, and how exactly to land your first job while starting from scratch. Click the link below to sign up for one of their free courses today. Wanna know a dirty little secret? And no, I'm not starting an only [BLEEP]. You're not broke because you suck with money. You just can't see where it's going. If your bank account is empty at the end of every month, that is not bad luck, that is bad tracking. And it's exactly why I use Dollar Wise. It shows you exactly where your money's going every single month. Spending, subscriptions, and savings all in one simple dashboard.

• 1:10:19Caleb Hammer?

  Everything you need and nothing you don't. And when you download Dollar Wise today, you'll get instant trial for free plus three months for just $9.99. So you can finally take control and see what your money's been doing behind your back. Click below to get started. Well, this is just a lot of people to be like sending dick pics to that you work with.

• 1:10:38Speaker 02

  I don't, what?

• 1:10:38Caleb Hammer?

  DW?

• 1:10:40Speaker 02

  What, oh, hmm.

• 1:10:42Caleb Hammer?

  Let's see what DW said. "So fine, where are you filming?" Oh my goodness.

• 1:10:50Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, I'm telling you. Listen, if you want a hot guy, just fuck position.

• 1:10:57Speaker 02

  He is really cute.

• 1:10:59Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, Colton would do so many bottoms.

• 1:11:04Caleb Hammer?

  Wow.

• 1:11:05Speaker 02

  Do so many bottoms.

• 1:11:06Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, I understand. Jeez. So are you sure you would be able to hold down a live stream? Cause again, you're kind of, you're not able to have a conversation.

• 1:11:16Speaker 02

  I, I guess not. I thought I could. For sure.

• 1:11:20Caleb Hammer?

  No. Really? Have you listened to yourself this conversation?

• 1:11:26Speaker 02

  It seemed, I, I, I don't know. I feel like I've normally been able to do it.

• 1:11:32Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. So what did you finance for $9,000 with a finance charge of additional $9,222?

• 1:11:37Speaker 02

  Oh, is that the upstart?

• 1:11:39Caleb Hammer?

  Is it? You tell me. Okay. What'd you do upstart?

• 1:11:42Speaker 02

  Oh my God, the upstart.

• 1:11:43Caleb Hammer?

  Why, what, when, how? Please try.

• 1:11:45Speaker 02

  Oh God, that's back, um, right before COVID?

• 1:11:52Speaker 02

  I believe during COVID, 2021?

• 1:11:55Caleb Hammer?

  No, 24, October 24.

• 1:11:57Speaker 02

  Oh, oh.

• 1:11:58Caleb Hammer?

  A year and a couple of months ago.

• 1:12:00Speaker 02

  Gotcha. Yes. That one was to cover the other one that I had during COVID.

• 1:12:06Caleb Hammer?

  You said it only cost a couple thousand dollars. This is already nine.

• 1:12:10Speaker 02

  Right. But I took out that one to cover what I had left of the other one.

• 1:12:14Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, what, what other one?

• 1:12:16Speaker 02

  The one that I had before.

• 1:12:17Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, the other upstart loan?

• 1:12:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:12:19Caleb Hammer?

  You took out a $9,000 upstart loan to pay off an upstart loan?

• 1:12:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:12:22Caleb Hammer?

  So you're giving them endless interest forever?

• 1:12:24Speaker 02

  Well, yeah.

• 1:12:25Caleb Hammer?

  You're paying for their entire company, their entire headquarters funded by you.

• 1:12:29Speaker 02

  Just me. Yes.

• 1:12:32Speaker 02

  It was to pay off LASIK and, um, the credit card debt that I had before.

• 1:12:37Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd you have to do LASIK?

• 1:12:39Speaker 02

  Cause I don't want our glasses.

• 1:12:40Caleb Hammer?

  You don't want, exactly. Wants. You didn't have to do that. What's more important?

• 1:12:43Speaker 02

  Cause I can't.

• 1:12:44Caleb Hammer?

  Butt cheeks or LASIK?

• 1:12:45Speaker 02

  Okay. Um, LASIK was very important.

• 1:12:49Caleb Hammer?

  What? You're telling me that's not a valid question in this conversation?

• 1:12:52Speaker 02

  That's, that's true.

• 1:12:54Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, it's true.

• 1:12:55Speaker 02

  I wanted to not have to wear glasses. Cause I can't do contacts.

• 1:12:58Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, that's why you did LASIK? Who would've thought?

• 1:13:01Speaker 02

  What? Yeah. That's why it was important.

• 1:13:02Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the fuck up. I don't know what the balance on this now is. Cause that interest is gonna be accruing throughout. I don't know. I assume it hasn't gone anywhere. No, doubt it. Probably not.

• 1:13:16Caleb Hammer?

  Plus a prepaid finance charge, so that principal became 10. I'll mark it at nine. I highly doubt it's that low yet, but it's a monthly payment of 304, 30404.

• 1:13:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:13:32Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, that's gonna stack. And what was your original upstart for in 2021, I'm being told?

• 1:13:37Speaker 02

  In 2021, the original upstart, I think, was like 12,000.

• 1:13:41Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness. What was it for?

• 1:13:43Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 1:13:44Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd you take it out?

• 1:13:45Speaker 02

  I told you, that's what it was for, the LASIK paying off mid. Yeah, the debit or not debit card.

• 1:13:50Caleb Hammer?

  I was the [bleep] at that time. Yes.

• 1:13:52Speaker 02

  It is, it's spreading. Hopefully it doesn't go over there.

• 1:13:56Caleb Hammer?

  You're wearing old women perfume.

• 1:13:58Speaker 02

  Oh, oh, no. I'm so offended by that.

• 1:14:03Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness. Oh, do your parents support your lifestyle?

• 1:14:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:14:07Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, that's good.

• 1:14:08Speaker 02

  It is.

• 1:14:09Caleb Hammer?

  Why do you owe them $40,000? That's insanity. That is crazy. What the [bleep].

• 1:14:17Caleb Hammer?

  That has to be one of the largest parent loans we've ever had, right? That's crazy. 40,000 for what?

• 1:14:23Speaker 02

  They helped pay my first, like, breast augmentation.

• 1:14:28Caleb Hammer?

  No, no, no, no. Then you lied at the beginning of the conversation. You literally told me the surgeries out of pocket for you have only cost a few thousand dollars.

• 1:14:35Speaker 02

  Yes, for the ones that I currently have right now, but the ones before.

• 1:14:39Caleb Hammer?

  You had previous boobs?

• 1:14:40Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:14:40Caleb Hammer?

  What? And so you owe them 40,000 dollars for boobs that don't even exist?

• 1:14:44Speaker 02

  Okay, the 40,000 was all for that. That other part is student loans as well. So they paid off my student loans and then the first surgery.

• 1:14:53Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness. You went to school for what?

• 1:14:55Speaker 02

  Ah, good question. Music, started vocal performance, like opera, realized what's going on with that.

• 1:15:03Caleb Hammer?

  That was both actual training that happened at a university?

• 1:15:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, from a while ago.

• 1:15:09Caleb Hammer?

  Oy.

• 1:15:09Speaker 02

  Oh, my God, you're totally not giving me, oh, my God, you should see my Instagram where it's actually like, I'm ready to sing.

• 1:15:15Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 1:15:16Speaker 02

  Well, okay, whatever. Vocal performance, and then after that, I went to live audio, like, working on the stages and stuff, and then behind the scenes.

• 1:15:29Caleb Hammer?

  Were you a man?

• 1:15:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, this is before I transitioned.

• 1:15:32Caleb Hammer?

  When did you transition?

• 1:15:33Speaker 02

  Two thousand, or two thousand nineteen.

• 1:15:35Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so you were on stage, well, back, back, audio, background, yeah, okay, good, then.

• 1:15:41Speaker 02

  So I went all around the music department at school, like, every single thing you could do.

• 1:15:45Caleb Hammer?

  And did you graduate?

• 1:15:46Speaker 02

  I did graduate.

• 1:15:47Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, in what?

• 1:15:48Speaker 02

  Uh, music education.

• 1:15:49Caleb Hammer?

  It was music education, you went to elementary school?

• 1:15:52Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:15:52Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 1:15:53Speaker 02

  High school for a year.

• 1:15:54Caleb Hammer?

  Eh?

• 1:15:55Speaker 02

  Before I transitioned.

• 1:15:56Caleb Hammer?

  But choir?

• 1:15:57Speaker 02

  Choir.

• 1:15:59Caleb Hammer?

  Ah.

• 1:16:00Speaker 02

  Cause you were a band person, yeah?

• 1:16:01Caleb Hammer?

  The least interesting of all.

• 1:16:03Speaker 02

  No, I loved choir.

• 1:16:05Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, you're gay.

• 1:16:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:16:09Speaker 02

  But you liked band?

• 1:16:10Caleb Hammer?

  Which is why I thought I was bi. And I'm not.

• 1:16:13Speaker 02

  Cause of band?

• 1:16:14Caleb Hammer?

  I like vagina, uh, regular ones.

• 1:16:17Speaker 02

  You don't know that.

• 1:16:18Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know, I haven't experienced, I haven't experimented, and my girlfriend doesn't have one, so I guess I won't.

• 1:16:23Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 1:16:23Caleb Hammer?

  She just has the normal.

• 1:16:24Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:16:25Caleb Hammer?

  Vagina classic, we call them.

• 1:16:27Speaker 02

  No, it's just vagina, not a neo vagina.

• 1:16:29Caleb Hammer?

  Vagina classic, natural, no, no monthly injections for that one.

• 1:16:36Speaker 02

  Monthly, it's weekly.

• 1:16:38Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, for, you have to buy it twice a month. Okay, okay, so the parents, um, now, this was years ago then, when did they do this?

• 1:16:47Speaker 02

  When did they?

• 1:16:48Caleb Hammer?

  Give you the forty thousand hours, you person, you person?

• 1:16:51Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no, that wasn't years ago.

• 1:16:52Caleb Hammer?

  When was it then?

• 1:16:53Speaker 02

  Just recently.

• 1:16:55Caleb Hammer?

  When was it? Please?

• 1:16:58Speaker 02

  August.

• 1:17:02Caleb Hammer?

  Is there, like, a minimum monthly payment?

• 1:17:05Speaker 02

  There will be, yeah.

• 1:17:06Caleb Hammer?

  What was that agreed on, when does it start, how much did you agree on it with them?

• 1:17:11Speaker 02

  That hasn't been decided yet.

• 1:17:14Caleb Hammer?

  Then how can you say it's gonna start quickly?

• 1:17:16Speaker 02

  Cause I'm, I told them I wanna pay off my upstart loan first. So I can put that money.

• 1:17:22Caleb Hammer?

  And did, did, did they agree?

• 1:17:24Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:17:25Caleb Hammer?

  But you're not rapidly paying off your upstart, in fact, a lot of your money has to go to the Apple Card. Because you spend an endless amount of money of bullshit on your Apple Card, duh. Listen, I'll let you use the Fizz Card, debit card that builds credit. Yeah, and whenever you decide to get a better paying job, which I mean, you actually do okay.

• 1:17:46Speaker 02

  I thought it was pretty good. I just got promoted.

• 1:17:48Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yes, except you thought you made $1,500 less. Doesn't matter. I'll get you an accounting certification so you can actually look at your shit through course careers.

• 1:17:55Speaker 02

  Thank God.

• 1:17:56Caleb Hammer?

  It's good shit. It's good shit.

• 1:17:58Speaker 02

  It is.

• 1:17:58Caleb Hammer?

  We'll also put you through our Master Your Money program. I know you signed up for one of the classes, but you get all the classes with it.

• 1:18:04Speaker 02

  No, I signed up for the whole thing.

• 1:18:05Caleb Hammer?

  The Master Your Money?

• 1:18:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:18:06Caleb Hammer?

  Good. Well, we'll make sure the rest of it is for free.

• 1:18:08Speaker 02

  And then right after, oh, thank you. Right after that is when I got.

• 1:18:11Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, make sure you're active in the community. A lot of people holding each other accountable, so make sure you do that. Listen, okay, so I don't even know what to put for a minimum payment there. You got kickoff. Okay, we talked about that. That's fine, though. You just do that as a normal thing.

• 1:18:27Caleb Hammer?

  But that's all your debt. Just those three debts? Apple, Upstart, and Parents. Nothing else?

• 1:18:32Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:18:33Caleb Hammer?

  What's your car situation?

• 1:18:34Speaker 02

  I paid it off.

• 1:18:35Caleb Hammer?

  You paid it off?

• 1:18:36Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:18:36Caleb Hammer?

  And why the are you with all this extra shit if you pay off a car?

• 1:18:40Speaker 02

  Well, wait.

• 1:18:42Caleb Hammer?

  If you were good enough to pay off a car, why are you with all this other debt? Oh, my goodness.

• 1:18:47Speaker 02

  Part of the Upstart was paying off the original Upstart that paid off the car.

• 1:18:57Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, checking account. Oh, my goodness. What is this? What is this Apple thing? What? What the provisional credit, provisional credit? What is this?

• 1:19:06Speaker 02

  I got hacked.

• 1:19:07Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 1:19:08Speaker 02

  I got hacked, so I had to cancel everything.

• 1:19:10Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness. It was like, it was like a whole, oh, my goodness, they took so much money. I'm glad you got that reversed, right, from the sounds of it?

• 1:19:18Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:19:19Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, good.

• 1:19:19Speaker 02

  We got it now, but it just doesn't look great on there.

• 1:19:21Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness. And then Apple Purchase, Apple Purchase, Apple Purchase. This is crazy. It was from them still, right?

• 1:19:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:19:26Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, all throughout. And something with MetaPay. $1,499 MetaPay?

• 1:19:31Speaker 02

  Exactly. That was the main, that was the thing that tipped me off that I was getting hacked.

• 1:19:36Caleb Hammer?

  That's crazy. Okay, you went inside, got some bullshit. Culvers again, Netflix, Domino's, Starbucks, Starbucks, stop with that, dude. Amazon, KFC, Amazon.

• 1:19:51Caleb Hammer?

  One month member something Starbucks Corbin's KFC Fortnite.

• 1:19:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:19:59Caleb Hammer?

  You're really living it up COVID, aren't you?

• 1:20:01Speaker 02

  Yeah. I thought I canceled that a while ago.

• 1:20:07Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 1:20:07Speaker 02

  No, haven't done it.

• 1:20:09Caleb Hammer?

  No. Apple bill, apple bill, Starbucks, going in, getting some energy drinks, some bullshit. Starbucks again assholes, apple bill, Starbucks, apple bill, Meta pay, Meta pay, Starbucks, Starbucks.

• 1:20:25Speaker 02

  Meta pay is not me.

• 1:20:26Caleb Hammer?

  None of them? Okay.

• 1:20:27Speaker 02

  Nope.

• 1:20:28Caleb Hammer?

  Well, those are a dollar each.

• 1:20:29Speaker 02

  I know, I know.

• 1:20:31Caleb Hammer?

  Your Starbucks were multi dollars.

• 1:20:32Speaker 02

  Multi dollars, yes.

• 1:20:34Caleb Hammer?

  Apple bill and other Meta pay. Oh, there it is. That's that one. An apple bill, then vending out money, vending out money and selling out money.

• 1:20:43Caleb Hammer?

  Crazy.

• 1:20:43Speaker 02

  It's my roommate.

• 1:20:44Caleb Hammer?

  5,000 in the savings. That's actually pretty good, but.

• 1:20:48Speaker 02

  I mean.

• 1:20:49Caleb Hammer?

  Do you have that instead of the, well, okay. What's your fidelity? You pulled through your 401k, so what was?

• 1:20:54Speaker 02

  Not fidelity though.

• 1:20:55Caleb Hammer?

  What was in your 401k? Cause now you only have 1,700 for retirement.

• 1:20:58Speaker 02

  Right.

• 1:20:59Caleb Hammer?

  Which at 32 is horrendous and disgusting and horribly behind in your.

• 1:21:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know.

• 1:21:04Caleb Hammer?

  So how much? You have, how much did you pull out?

• 1:21:07Speaker 02

  23.

• 1:21:08Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my gosh.

• 1:21:10Speaker 02

  But it wasn't through fidelity.

• 1:21:12Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. And then, oh, you just also just blew 2,500 in your checking account. For what?

• 1:21:17Speaker 02

  For the TV.

• 1:21:18Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, for moving. No, for moving.

• 1:21:20Speaker 02

  Oh, the moving on top.

• 1:21:21Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, what did you do? Why does it cost so much money for people to move? What is wrong with you?

• 1:21:26Speaker 02

  It's so expensive.

• 1:21:26Caleb Hammer?

  No, I have never, I have never spent even remotely that much money.

• 1:21:31Speaker 02

  I had to.

• 1:21:32Caleb Hammer?

  And I have money.

• 1:21:33Speaker 02

  I had to move from.

• 1:21:34Caleb Hammer?

  And I move endlessly.

• 1:21:36Speaker 02

  Fargo, North Dakota.

• 1:21:37Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, Fargo.

• 1:21:38Speaker 02

  Minneapolis.

• 1:21:39Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh. I moved from Campbell'sville, Michigan to Austin with like a couple hundred bucks. What the is wrong with you?

• 1:21:44Speaker 02

  What did you bring?

• 1:21:45Caleb Hammer?

  I sold everything and packed up my sedan. Why'd you have to? Yeah, it would have been cheaper to just get some used shit on marketplace.

• 1:21:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, I didn't sell anything.

• 1:21:52Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, no shit.

• 1:21:53Speaker 02

  My last.

• 1:21:54Caleb Hammer?

  What the, how could you afford that in your checking account, dude?

• 1:21:58Speaker 02

  Worked a lot overtime for that.

• 1:22:01Caleb Hammer?

  Did you? Cause you're.

• 1:22:01Speaker 02

  Before I got promoted.

• 1:22:02Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, cause your salary now.

• 1:22:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. That's why I moved. Cause I got promoted.

• 1:22:08Caleb Hammer?

  That's why you moved? It's not because you were forced out of the, when did you leave that teacher job?

• 1:22:13Speaker 02

  Oh gosh.

• 1:22:16Speaker 02

  Oh gosh, 2023?

• 1:22:20Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, that wasn't that long ago. How'd you have to think about it that hard? Okay, so why'd you leave? I mean, you said you were forced to leave.

• 1:22:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, I left because I didn't want to be monitored. Like, if I wasn't able to do my job as a teacher and like have that be enough.

• 1:22:35Caleb Hammer?

  But maybe it would have blown over the controversy.

• 1:22:38Speaker 02

  No, because I was literally called down to the principal's office.

• 1:22:41Caleb Hammer?

  They told you to stop?

• 1:22:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:22:42Caleb Hammer?

  Then stop posting [BLEEP] and lose. You're a teacher. An elementary school teacher.

• 1:22:46Speaker 02

  During the day!

• 1:22:47Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, but stop posting it if that's the rules. Really? Why was that? Why is you posting titties online, more important?

• 1:22:55Speaker 02

  Because that was something that was making money off as well.

• 1:22:59Caleb Hammer?

  Huh? Making your what?

• 1:23:00Speaker 02

  Was making money off that as well.

• 1:23:02Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, come on. Was it comparable? Then where's that money today?

• 1:23:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, good question.

• 1:23:08Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 1:23:09Speaker 02

  Spent it.

• 1:23:11Caleb Hammer?

  So did you quit at the end of a school year?

• 1:23:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:23:13Caleb Hammer?

  Thank goodness.

• 1:23:14Speaker 02

  I wouldn't leave in the middle.

• 1:23:15Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I don't know. With you, I don't know.

• 1:23:18Speaker 02

  So another reason that I left Fargo was because of the roommate situation that I was in.

• 1:23:24Caleb Hammer?

  The roommate situation? What was that?

• 1:23:27Speaker 02

  It was...

• 1:23:28Caleb Hammer?

  What, an anti-trans?

• 1:23:30Speaker 02

  No, it was a trans person.

• 1:23:33Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so you guys were transing it up, touching fake clips?

• 1:23:36Speaker 02

  Oh, God. Ugh, no. No, no, no, no.

• 1:23:40Caleb Hammer?

  You're the one with one. I don't know. I'm not disgusted by it.

• 1:23:42Speaker 02

  I was the one. My roommate was an older person that transitioned older, like...

• 1:23:49Caleb Hammer?

  Is this, are we ageist?

• 1:23:51Speaker 02

  No, but I'm just telling you the situation. I put them through tranny bootcamp, essentially.

• 1:23:58Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 1:23:59Speaker 02

  Yep, tranny bootcamp.

• 1:24:01Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, okay.

• 1:24:02Speaker 02

  Because nobody was there.

• 1:24:02Caleb Hammer?

  I'm also sure the parents of the school loves that you have a [BLEEP] camp.

• 1:24:07Speaker 02

  Well, but that was afterwards.

• 1:24:09Caleb Hammer?

  I'm kidding. Come on, tell me. Yes, tell me.

• 1:24:14Speaker 00

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• 1:24:39Speaker 02

  Um, so they, I had no one when I transitioned, so I wanted to try to be that person for somebody. And, long story short, they ended up falling in love with me.

• 1:24:48Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, tell them no.

• 1:24:50Speaker 02

  I did.

• 1:24:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, there you go. What? How old were they? How old are you?

• 1:24:54Speaker 02

  Sixty-three.

• 1:24:56Caleb Hammer?

  And how old are you?

• 1:24:58Speaker 02

  Thirty-two.

• 1:24:59Caleb Hammer?

  Why are you roommates with them, weirdo?

• 1:25:00Speaker 02

  I was to help them. I needed a roommate. And they needed a roommate as well.

• 1:25:05Caleb Hammer?

  What a mistake.

• 1:25:06Speaker 02

  It was.

• 1:25:07Caleb Hammer?

  So what happened then?

• 1:25:08Speaker 02

  A hundred percent.

• 1:25:08Caleb Hammer?

  That you had to emergency spend two thousand five hundred to move?

• 1:25:11Speaker 02

  Well, that and the manager.

• 1:25:13Caleb Hammer?

  What happened?

• 1:25:15Speaker 02

  They were very protective, overprotective of me, weirdly, like, and jealous of guys that I would hang out with.

• 1:25:26Speaker 02

  They were guys, what?

• 1:25:27Caleb Hammer?

  That you would

• 1:25:28Speaker 02

  Oh, yes, hang out with.

• 1:25:30Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 1:25:32Caleb Hammer?

  You're, you, you are not smart.

• 1:25:33Speaker 02

  And, to the point where, like, they got very, very violent and

• 1:25:41Caleb Hammer?

  And what way to who and how?

• 1:25:43Speaker 02

  To me.

• 1:25:44Caleb Hammer?

  So they're protecting you, so they hit you?

• 1:25:46Speaker 02

  No, to, like

• 1:25:49Caleb Hammer?

  The guys?

• 1:25:49Speaker 02

  The, it was Yeah, essentially, but the guys weren't there.

• 1:25:53Caleb Hammer?

  Fight the straight men?

• 1:25:55Speaker 02

  No, they wouldn't actually fight the straight men.

• 1:25:57Caleb Hammer?

  What are you saying? You said they got violent.

• 1:25:58Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:25:59Caleb Hammer?

  They?

• 1:26:00Speaker 02

  They did get violent. They did get violent. They had a gun, so that made me very uncomfortable.

• 1:26:05Caleb Hammer?

  Shoot someone?

• 1:26:05Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:26:06Caleb Hammer?

  Where's the violence?

• 1:26:07Speaker 02

  They had one. They like, they like threatened to.

• 1:26:11Caleb Hammer?

  They threatened to shoot you?

• 1:26:12Speaker 02

  Not me, the guys.

• 1:26:15Caleb Hammer?

  Did he threaten the guys?

• 1:26:16Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:26:17Caleb Hammer?

  He threatened them. He said, I will shoot you.

• 1:26:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, I will kill you.

• 1:26:19Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, there it is. That is bad. That is bad.

• 1:26:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, so I was on the

• 1:26:23Caleb Hammer?

  I understand wanting to move from that.

• 1:26:25Speaker 02

  Well, it just, I didn't want to be with someone that was like in love with me in that weird way.

• 1:26:30Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, that's weird. But also, if you set your boundary and they're like chill with it, it should be okay.

• 1:26:34Speaker 02

  They're not chill with it.

• 1:26:34Caleb Hammer?

  Not with it.

• 1:26:35Speaker 02

  There was no boundaries.

• 1:26:37Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 1:26:38Speaker 02

  That was the problem.

• 1:26:39Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, I agree. Did you guys

• 1:26:40Speaker 02

  God, no.

• 1:26:41Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Did you see it?

• 1:26:43Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:26:44Caleb Hammer?

  You never saw it?

• 1:26:45Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:26:45Caleb Hammer?

  He was in love with you and he never tried to manipulate that? Okay, that's good.

• 1:26:48Speaker 02

  He

• 1:26:49Caleb Hammer?

  Well, he tried, but he didn't like force.

• 1:26:50Speaker 02

  They did.

• 1:26:52Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, good.

• 1:26:52Speaker 02

  But I was like.

• 1:26:53Caleb Hammer?

  Good. Yeah, put your, put your, draw your line. That's good. Always draw a line.

• 1:26:57Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:26:58Caleb Hammer?

  We like that. You can advocate for yourself.

• 1:26:59Speaker 02

  So I needed to get out of.

• 1:27:00Caleb Hammer?

  These days.

• 1:27:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, I needed to get out of that situation, plus getting promoted.

• 1:27:04Caleb Hammer?

  Call the cops on him.

• 1:27:06Speaker 02

  Almost.

• 1:27:06Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, fuck.

• 1:27:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:27:07Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, almost.

• 1:27:08Speaker 02

  And that was the point where I was like, okay, this needs to change.

• 1:27:13Caleb Hammer?

  All right, let's make you a budget.

• 1:27:17Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, I mean, what's, what's your rent?

• 1:27:21Speaker 02

  Sixteen fifty.

• 1:27:22Caleb Hammer?

  One thousand six hundred fifty. You said internet, gas, electric utilities are all included in that?

• 1:27:27Speaker 02

  Yep, in garage.

• 1:27:29Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, I wasn't, okay.

• 1:27:31Speaker 02

  Part of it.

• 1:27:32Caleb Hammer?

  Twenty-five dollars for the Apple card and three hundred four dollars and four cents for the upstart. No minimum payments to the parents yet, so that makes your debt minimum monthly payments three hundred twenty-nine dollars and four cents. Okay, vroom, vroom, drive, drive gasoline to run over the protesters. How much?

• 1:27:53Speaker 02

  Twenty bucks.

• 1:27:53Caleb Hammer?

  A month?

• 1:27:56Caleb Hammer?

  You live right next to the coffee shop?

• 1:27:57Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:27:58Caleb Hammer?

  Literally?

• 1:27:58Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:27:59Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:28:00Speaker 02

  And it's a Prius.

• 1:28:02Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not gonna say the word. I'm not gonna call you one.

• 1:28:07Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, car insurance, how much?

• 1:28:09Speaker 02

  Um, seventy-five.

• 1:28:11Caleb Hammer?

  What? That's incredible.

• 1:28:12Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:28:12Caleb Hammer?

  Phone bill?

• 1:28:14Speaker 02

  A hundred and ten.

• 1:28:15Caleb Hammer?

  Ah, there it is. You owe on your phone?

• 1:28:17Speaker 02

  I mean, it's, I have the.

• 1:28:19Caleb Hammer?

  You owe on your phone?

• 1:28:20Speaker 02

  Apple upgrade program.

• 1:28:21Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, I would do helium anyway. It's like fifteen bucks a month, and T-Mobile has to be getting.

• 1:28:25Speaker 02

  Can that work?

• 1:28:27Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 1:28:28Speaker 02

  With an upgrade, Apple upgrade.

• 1:28:30Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you would just have to get off that program.

• 1:28:33Speaker 02

  Well, that's the problem.

• 1:28:34Caleb Hammer?

  Why is your under nose wet this entire conversation? Does it just drain with all the things you've done?

• 1:28:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, sure.

• 1:28:41Caleb Hammer?

  Does it?

• 1:28:42Speaker 02

  No, I think it's makeup.

• 1:28:44Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 1:28:44Speaker 02

  I think it happens sometimes with makeup.

• 1:28:46Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Well, you're not sniffing.

• 1:28:49Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no, no.

• 1:28:51Caleb Hammer?

  Groceries, three hundred bucks a month. Use the meal plan and the cookbook and all that good stuff that comes with mass your money.

• 1:28:57Speaker 02

  That I have.

• 1:28:58Caleb Hammer?

  That's exactly. TP fun, anything else you need to survive. I'm gonna make you one seventy-five instead of a hundred, because you need extra things.

• 1:29:06Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 1:29:07Caleb Hammer?

  You don't need tampons, though.

• 1:29:08Speaker 02

  Nope.

• 1:29:08Caleb Hammer?

  Which is nice.

• 1:29:08Speaker 02

  Nope. I don't even need to performatively have that.

• 1:29:12Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, do some-

• 1:29:13Speaker 02

  That's a thing. Oh yeah, that's a thing.

• 1:29:15Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, okay. Medical healthcare, co-pays on a monthly basis. Come on, I know you got... Come on, you don't have medication to take.

• 1:29:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it's not a monthly thing.

• 1:29:25Caleb Hammer?

  You don't have co-pays?

• 1:29:26Speaker 02

  It's every three months.

• 1:29:27Caleb Hammer?

  How much for that?

• 1:29:29Speaker 02

  Seventy-five dollars.

• 1:29:30Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. I'll put like thirty bucks. Twenty-five bucks. You have a gym?

• 1:29:36Speaker 02

  Nope.

• 1:29:37Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Subscriptions, I'll put in fifty. You have any pets?

• 1:29:42Speaker 02

  Nope.

• 1:29:44Caleb Hammer?

  That's good. You're not planning on it, are you?

• 1:29:46Speaker 02

  Uh, no.

• 1:29:47Caleb Hammer?

  That's good. Anything else I need to put in this budget?

• 1:29:51Speaker 02

  You put-

• 1:29:52Caleb Hammer?

  It's pretty, it's pretty lean, which is great. Honestly, I don't know how you're but... What?

• 1:29:58Speaker 02

  I mean, spending habits is what's it up.

• 1:30:00Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, that's what I'm saying.

• 1:30:02Speaker 02

  And the fact that I overspent by that much, I'm so gagged. Uh.

• 1:30:08Caleb Hammer?

  Nope, it's not happening. Okay, needed to survive on a monthly basis, two thousand seven hundred thirty-four dollars and four cents. You make five.

• 1:30:21Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, you shouldn't have to take out money from your parents. You have an extra two thousand two hundred dollars on a monthly basis. Give you two hundred for fun. You have two thousand dollars left on a monthly basis. Apple's paid off in a month. Don't use it again. You can use the Fiz card.

• 1:30:35Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, what is wrong with you?

• 1:30:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, Upstart is paid off in about four.

• 1:30:41Speaker 02

  Four months?

• 1:30:42Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, dude, because you actually have money, even with spending four hundred on fun. And with your two thousand three hundred fifty dollars you have left on a monthly basis at that point, two thousand three hundred at that point, takes a year and a quarter to pay off your parents. This is all done in a year and three quarters. Two years, max. Then you get a fully funded emergency fund, and then you start contributing to retirement again, maybe fifty, twenty-five, twenty-five, fifty percent on living, twenty-five percent for fun, twenty-five percent for investing, and you have a great life. Okay, we have a lot of crazy things to talk about in the post-show, and a lot of crazy things are gonna happen in the post-show. You can already tell. Brandon, get ready. Get the hands ready for squeezing.

• 1:31:24Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 1:31:26Caleb Hammer?

  Join Hammer Elite. I'm gonna get the Hammer Financial Score done first and then make sure you click that join button for Hammer Elite. Best membership on YouTube, number one, three shows a day, six days a week. Spending in your budget, you overspend zero out of 10 debt. Not the worst, but the parent loan kinda sucks, but I'll say two out of 10. Parent loan brings it down. Emergency fund, and the upstart is pretty brutal as well. Emergency fund, it was about a three out of 10. Retirement, not good. One out of 10. Real estate, zero out of 10. You shouldn't have said you were a zero with that little bit of savings you had. That doesn't really make sense. Hammer Financial Score, 1.5 out of 10. Get yours at CalebHammer.com. Now join us for an extra 20 minutes in the Hammer, or in the Financial Auto Post Show. See you there. You gotta call your parents. It is time to own up. You gotta own the [bleep] up for

• 1:32:11Caleb Hammer?

  your mistakes. Call them now.

• 1:32:15Speaker 02

  When were we planning on starting that repayment? I mentioned it a couple of times. I don't know, maybe Dad has too. I think I would be able to pay it back in [bleep].

• 1:32:26Caleb Hammer?

  Hey guys, don't forget about Free Cash. Linked in the description and pinned comment below.

• 1:32:32Speaker 06

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