He Exploited Pr*stitutes, Now He's F*cked | Financial Audit

Use code 50HAMMER to get 50% OFF plus free shipping on your first Factor box at https://bit.ly/3U6sqKD! ▶That's right... Per his request, we decided to do a REAL job interview for him to work at Hammer Media... and let's just say... You are going to want to watch this post show more than any other- watch here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLe_q9axMaeTbjN0hy1Z9xA/join ▶▶Download my *budgeting app* today: *Apple:* https://apple.co/4iChGhr *Google Play:* https://bit.ly/sb-googleplay Don't overcomplicate this crap! All you need is an automated / SIMPLE budget. This comes with automatic account connections, my budget-friendly cookbook, an online community, and exclusive discounts on my products- change your financial future *NOW* ▶▶▶ *AND REMEMBER* those who sign up for Simpler Budget Premium *annual* get a signed versions of the Cook Book and Simpler Budget Founders Edition Journal, just send proof of annual here: https://tally.so/r/3xzPq5 Use Yrefy to refinance your private student loans today at: https://yrefy.com/hammer or call (888) Yrefy-78 Go to https://ro.co/caleb to see if your insurance covers GLP-1s—for free. Want an inside look at my investment portfolio? Follow me on Blossom Social to see how it’s broken down! 📊💰👉 https://blossomsocialapp.page.link/calebhammer ▶▶▶Download my *budgeting app* today: *Apple:* https://apple.co/4iChGhr *Google Play:* https://bit.ly/sb-googleplay ▶ Watch this episode's *POST* *SHOW* + get *MORE* Financial Audit here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLe_q9axMaeTbjN0hy1Z9xA/join ___________________________________________ ▶EDUCATION: 1. Bundle my budgeting, debt, investing and real estate program for *15% off* https://calebhammer.com/classpack/ 2. *The best budgeting program online: https://calebhammer.com/budget 3. Get my investing class and I’ll give you a $100 towards investing: https://calebhammer.com/investing 4. Win with GOOD debt and get out of BAD debt correctly, learn in my debt program: https://calebhammer.com/formula 5. Everything you need for buying your first home to buy your first investment property: https://calebhammer.com/realestate/ 6. Get your own free Hammer Financial Score: https://www.calebhammer.com ___________________________________________ ▶RESOURCES 1. Checking & Savings: Get up to 3.80% APY, pay no account fees, and earn up to $300 when you sign up and set up direct deposits. Terms apply: https://creator.sofi.com/c/5535481/2068695/19219?adcampaignid=bank&adnetwork=brand *affiliate link 2. CourseCareers: Land a high-paying job with no experience or degree by going through an affordable online course https://coursecareers.com/CalebHammer 3. Get $20 from Acorns for free: sign up to get your bonus https://acorns.com/caleb 4. Get an exclusive HighLevel 30-day trial: https://gohighlevel.com/calebhammer 5. The credit building debit card: First 100,000 people to sign up for Fizz with code: HAMMER10 get $10: https://www.joinfizz.com/caleb (paid ad) 6. Helium Mobile: save a ton on your phone bill, sign up and get a FREE plan when using promo code CALEB https://hellohelium.com/ 7. Online security: Protect your online privacy and security NOW and for free by following my link Aura: https://aura.com/hammer 8. Therapy: Make SonderMind your mental health home in 2025. Sign up at: https://pages.sondermind.com/caleb/ 9. Stock Investing: Earn up to $5,000 in Cash Back every year on your Stocks & ETFs. Terms apply: https://silomarkets.com/caleb All investing involves risk. Silo Financial LLC (“Silo”) is registered with the SEC. The creator receives cash compensation and is not affiliated with Silo. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change, your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 0:12Speaker 01

  Price and participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.

• 0:16Speaker 02

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• 0:41Caleb Hammer?

  To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube. We know that you have paid women, and still do, for into [BLEEP].

• 0:49Speaker 04

  I don't pay for nothing. They pay for me.

• 0:52Caleb Hammer?

  End quote from you, Chase [BLEEP] lately.

• 0:54Speaker 04

  When these women meet me and they talk to me and they get to know me,

• 0:57Caleb Hammer?

  The [BLEEP].

• 0:58Speaker 04

  They love me.

• 0:59Caleb Hammer?

  The [BLEEP], right?

• 1:00Speaker 04

  You think Jeff Bezos with his pretty wife didn't have to pay her a little bit? Be like, hey, come on a date with me while I get some [BLEEP].

• 1:07Caleb Hammer?

  Download my budgeting app today and take control of your money once and for all. And for a limited time only, sign up for the annual version of Premium and get my cookbook and notebook signed and mailed directly to you. Link in the description and pinned comment below.

• 1:21Speaker 04

  Hi, I'm Rico Suave. I'm 23 years old and I live in Austin, Texas. This is Financial Audit.

• 1:27Caleb Hammer?

  Thanks for coming on, buddy. Uh, thanks for coming in. I know you're pretty close to the studio, so what do you do here for a living in Austin? We haven't had like local in a while.

• 1:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, that's true. You know, actually I work in real estate right now. It's kind of my thing. Um, pretty much just making cold calls and taking names is what I do.

• 1:46Caleb Hammer?

  Does that make money?

• 1:47Speaker 04

  Um, not really, to be honest. I mean, right now I'm just trying to get by. I mean, really, it's all about-

• 1:53Caleb Hammer?

  Are you getting by?

• 1:54Speaker 04

  Uh, you know, that's a good question, Caleb. I mean, I think getting by just comes down to if you can make the monthly rent payment.

• 2:02Caleb Hammer?

  Are you making the monthly rent payment?

• 2:05Speaker 04

  Most of the time, most of the time I am, you know? I mean, there's a bit of luck-

• 2:08Caleb Hammer?

  When do you not?

• 2:09Speaker 04

  Probably really when, you know, I'm out of money. That's when I'm not making rent payment. I got-

• 2:14Caleb Hammer?

  That, that's a given. I'm asking like when timeline are you typically not?

• 2:19Speaker 04

  When I'm not, ah, I'm trying to think. Probably by the end of this month. That's gonna be.

• 2:25Caleb Hammer?

  By the end of this month?

• 2:27Speaker 04

  That's a chopping block.

• 2:28Caleb Hammer?

  Why the are you doing this bull cold call real estate crap? What are you trying to be an agent?

• 2:32Speaker 04

  I'm, you know, I'm, I'm switching gears a little bit.

• 2:35Caleb Hammer?

  Tell me what you're doing. Tell me what you're doing because we need to position yourself in a place where you can make money. Pay your rent. What are you doing with your forty hours allocated to work on a weekly basis? What are you doing?

• 2:45Speaker 04

  Yeah, what I'm doing? I'm trying to think. I mean, sitting by the pool quite often. You know, I think pondering my thoughts has been like.

• 2:53Caleb Hammer?

  In your job, this cold calling bull.

• 2:55Speaker 04

  Oh, job wise. I'm trying to think, um, most of the time I'm just kind of sitting there and they give me like a huge list.

• 3:03Caleb Hammer?

  Who? What is the job?

• 3:05Speaker 04

  Oh, the job?

• 3:06Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, what is the job?

• 3:08Speaker 04

  So it's.

• 3:10Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my gosh, dude. That start, my friend.

• 3:14Speaker 04

  It's not like technically like a real job by any means, so.

• 3:17Caleb Hammer?

  Then why aren't you working a real job?

• 3:20Speaker 04

  What's what, you know, I'm gonna look for, but you know what? I actually have, uh.

• 3:23Caleb Hammer?

  When's the last time you've had a real job?

• 3:25Speaker 04

  Maybe a few weeks ago, a few weeks ago.

• 3:27Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, okay.

• 3:28Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:29Caleb Hammer?

  What were you doing?

• 3:30Speaker 04

  I was a luxury short term house manager.

• 3:33Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, I don't know exactly what that entails, but what were you making?

• 3:35Speaker 04

  I was making like twenty bucks an hour. Yeah.

• 3:38Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, not bad.

• 3:39Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:39Caleb Hammer?

  Forty hours a week?

• 3:40Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:41Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you can pay rent probably maybe with that depending on your rent situation.

• 3:44Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:44Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, okay. Why'd you leave?

• 3:47Speaker 04

  I don't, I got fired, actually.

• 3:51Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:55Caleb Hammer?

  Why?

• 3:56Speaker 04

  Well, I got fired, so, uh, they have a company card which you use for the, the guests.

• 4:01Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 4:01Speaker 04

  You know, if you want to get them like a little gift or something, but in my case, the gift was to me and it was, uh, chicken nut, chicken nuggets.

• 4:08Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck you doing? You're nuggying it up? Who's the McNuggets?

• 4:11Speaker 04

  You tell me nuggets are the, you gotta have nuggets. I mean, telling you what, I can't go by without little nuggies.

• 4:17Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, use your own money.

• 4:18Speaker 04

  I mean, that's, that's true.

• 4:20Caleb Hammer?

  Do. That's what I do. I use my own money for my nuggies.

• 4:23Speaker 04

  Did I tell you about the hack, though? There's a hack. There's one thing.

• 4:26Caleb Hammer?

  Did I tell you about the hack? We've been talking for three minutes and no, you've not used the word hack.

• 4:31Speaker 04

  You, there's a good hack out there. It's called the DoorDash hack.

• 4:34Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you gotta do. Is this the hack that got you fired?

• 4:36Speaker 04

  It might have. I mean, there's some.

• 4:39Caleb Hammer?

  Doesn't sound like much like, much of a hack.

• 4:41Speaker 04

  There's, there's some leniency involved. I mean, what happened was.

• 4:45Caleb Hammer?

  You got fired. Doesn't sound very lenient.

• 4:47Speaker 04

  It depends how you look at it. So what happened, pretty much, you know, I was just hungry one day and I, you know, company credit cards right there. You know, I opened up the DoorDash app and, you know, I just typed in my information, told them I want some Raisin Canes. Came right on over and, um, accidentally used the company card.

• 5:05Caleb Hammer?

  Accidentally?

• 5:06Speaker 04

  Accidentally, yes. I like to use the word accidentally quite often. Um, so.

• 5:10Caleb Hammer?

  Was it accidentally?

• 5:11Speaker 04

  It, it definitely was.

• 5:12Caleb Hammer?

  No, was it accidentally? If you like to use that word quite often.

• 5:15Speaker 04

  Accidentally forgot to include some sauces, which actually made the meal free, which is good. So it ended up going back to the company. Got my free, my free chicken.

• 5:24Caleb Hammer?

  Something tells me you probably were in the job and they used this as the final straw and you were, how long were you in this job?

• 5:30Speaker 04

  I was there for about like five months, I think.

• 5:33Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 5:34Speaker 04

  Yeah. Five months. Five good months. Five solid months.

• 5:37Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think so.

• 5:39Speaker 04

  Are you sure about that? I mean, I, I would love to show you my skills and actually bring it to your company, Caleb. And if I give me a chance, I won't use the company credit card for chicken.

• 5:51Caleb Hammer?

  I wouldn't let you near a company credit card.

• 5:55Caleb Hammer?

  Are you being serious or are you joking?

• 5:57Speaker 04

  I know, I'm being serious. I mean, I'm telling you, I got the great personality. I got the look. I know how to cook.

• 6:02Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you're handsome. I don't know what cooking would have to do with.

• 6:06Speaker 04

  I mean.

• 6:07Caleb Hammer?

  What we're doing.

• 6:08Speaker 04

  Think about it. I mean, you're like, I'm like, was this like Breaking Bad? I'm like the Jesse.

• 6:12Caleb Hammer?

  This is financial audit.

• 6:14Speaker 04

  The, the, this is what? Financial audit? I mean, I'm thinking about like a comparison, like the Batman and the Robin. I mean, you could be like.

• 6:21Caleb Hammer?

  You're the gay one?

• 6:22Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah. He's such a good worker. I promise not to use the company credit card. Yet, but if you give me some time, put in some effort, you'll see. You, you'll.

• 6:33Caleb Hammer?

  Are you being genuine?

• 6:34Speaker 04

  I'm being honest. I'm doing this, being honest as I can.

• 6:37Caleb Hammer?

  You actually want a job?

• 6:38Speaker 04

  Yeah, of course.

• 6:39Caleb Hammer?

  Fifty job openings right now.

• 6:41Speaker 04

  Really?

• 6:41Caleb Hammer?

  You don't even know.

• 6:43Speaker 04

  I mean, I looked. I saw one of them.

• 6:45Caleb Hammer?

  Oh buddy, I think you might.

• 6:49Speaker 04

  You know, I get that quite often, you know, I think confidence makes up for the fact that I'm a little slow, but it's okay.

• 6:55Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know if I would want the slowest among us to be the most confident.

• 6:59Speaker 04

  Well, I'll tell you what.

• 7:00Caleb Hammer?

  What job do you want?

• 7:02Speaker 04

  I want to be.

• 7:03Caleb Hammer?

  Guy who just got fired for using the company credit card? Do you still have that credit card? Did you give it back?

• 7:10Speaker 04

  Allegedly, the company card is still on my iPhone still, allegedly. In pursuit of buying more chicken potentially.

• 7:18Caleb Hammer?

  Are you actually using it?

• 7:20Speaker 04

  I'm not using it.

• 7:23Speaker 04

  Currently.

• 7:26Caleb Hammer?

  Have you used it since being fired?

• 7:28Speaker 04

  Um.

• 7:29Caleb Hammer?

  Bloody fuck off.

• 7:30Speaker 04

  If you.

• 7:31Caleb Hammer?

  Off your piece of.

• 7:34Caleb Hammer?

  That's not funny.

• 7:36Speaker 04

  I'm telling you, man.

• 7:37Caleb Hammer?

  You're not funny.

• 7:38Speaker 04

  They were supposed to reimburse me for gas. I mean, I'm just reimbursing the gas in terms of food, you know? You kind of get what I'm saying?

• 7:45Caleb Hammer?

  They told me you used it to buy.

• 7:47Speaker 04

  I did buy.

• 7:51Speaker 04

  I actually did do that. I did do that. It was good.

• 7:54Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck am I talking to right now? Um, you're not even close to being considered for a job.

• 8:02Speaker 04

  I mean, think about it though. I mean, mistakes are made.

• 8:04Caleb Hammer?

  Why would I hire you if you're actually being serious, but you have a weird.

• 8:08Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 8:08Caleb Hammer?

  Personality. I interacted with him in the lobby earlier.

• 8:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 8:11Caleb Hammer?

  This is him. Uh.

• 8:14Speaker 04

  Well, I'll tell you what, let me, let me tell you something important Caleb, like Jocko Willink, you know that Navy SEAL guy? He said one time that if he had to bring one person to war, he won't bring the guy with the sharpest sword. He won't bring the guy with the smartest, the smartest head. He would bring the luckiest guy and the luckiest guy tends to be the slowest guy in my opinion.

• 8:33Caleb Hammer?

  But he got fired a couple of weeks ago.

• 8:34Speaker 04

  I'm telling you, I'm telling you.

• 8:35Caleb Hammer?

  That's not lucky, you got fired.

• 8:37Speaker 04

  Lucky is being better than anything.

• 8:38Caleb Hammer?

  You got fired a couple of weeks ago, that's not luck.

• 8:41Speaker 04

  You gotta be, it's, it's all luck, it comes down to luck, baby.

• 8:43Caleb Hammer?

  Where's your luck? You got fired a couple of weeks ago.

• 8:46Speaker 04

  I mean, I'm telling you, man, that was there, that was on them.

• 8:49Caleb Hammer?

  But yes, that was on them, but it's impacting your life. Where's your luck? What the fuck are you talking about? Why would I bring someone with a sharp sword anyway to a war where they might get new?

• 8:56Speaker 04

  No, I don't got a sharp sword, I got luck.

• 8:58Caleb Hammer?

  No, I know, why would I bring either of those? It doesn't really make any sense.

• 9:01Speaker 04

  Man.

• 9:02Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I would prefer to bring the smartest one.

• 9:07Speaker 04

  I'm telling you, I'm telling you, the luckiest guy is the best guy.

• 9:10Caleb Hammer?

  You have no luck, you just got fired, you dumb.

• 9:13Speaker 04

  That's, I mean, think about how long I was there for, you even said yourself.

• 9:15Caleb Hammer?

  Five months, that's not really good.

• 9:18Speaker 04

  Five months is great.

• 9:19Caleb Hammer?

  Oh boy, so what's your work history dude?

• 9:22Speaker 04

  Alright, well, we have to get into that, so.

• 9:25Caleb Hammer?

  Briefly then.

• 9:26Speaker 04

  I, you know, I've, I actually have gotten fired.

• 9:27Caleb Hammer?

  Briefly, oh. Are you proud of this?

• 9:31Speaker 04

  I'm not necessarily not proud of it, I mean, what do you consider?

• 9:35Caleb Hammer?

  I need to interject, again, I interacted with this dude outside before we started filming. This is like a real human that exists on the streets of Austin, Texas.

• 9:44Speaker 04

  You know, it's funny you bring that up, cause um, I am actually a twin, so, you know, people might confuse me. I'm the more handsome one, obviously, but that's okay, that's okay, if anyone cares, obviously, ladies.

• 9:59Speaker 04

  Anyways, you said you got fifty job openings, which ones are we, are we looking at for myself? I think I'd be a great sales guy.

• 10:04Caleb Hammer?

  That would be you, okay, we have a sales one.

• 10:07Speaker 04

  I like sales, sales is great, I'm a cold caller, I'm a great guy, I can approach anyone on the streets, not even speaking the language.

• 10:14Caleb Hammer?

  It doesn't sound like you've closed many though.

• 10:16Speaker 04

  I mean, you just gotta talk to some.

• 10:17Caleb Hammer?

  You like calling the number, doesn't seem like you push them over the finish line.

• 10:21Speaker 04

  I mean, I could tell you, I, I worked in a. Sales before I actually did a little bit of

• 10:27Speaker 04

  I actually worked there for a week doing cold calling. But I tell you what, I was like a phone monkey, dude. I was pushing the buttons. I was taking names. I was getting deals done.

• 10:37Caleb Hammer?

  One week.

• 10:38Speaker 04

  Yeah, one week, but that one week was probably the greatest of my career. I'm not gonna lie. Some people brag about 10 seconds. I brag about one week, so let that be said.

• 10:50Caleb Hammer?

  Who's bragging about 10 seconds? What the? What are you talking about?

• 10:53Speaker 04

  I don't, I don't know anything about 10 seconds, Caleb. I'll tell you that.

• 10:58Speaker 04

  You know anything about 10 seconds?

• 11:00Caleb Hammer?

  What are you talking about?

• 11:02Speaker 04

  And we could change the topic. It's fine.

• 11:07Caleb Hammer?

  Why are you here, man?

• 11:10Speaker 04

  You know, I, I know, I know. I came here one for a job and you know.

• 11:14Caleb Hammer?

  Actually?

• 11:14Speaker 04

  Yeah, obviously. I mean, what else? I mean, this is the best financial YouTube channel. You think Dave Ramsey would take a guy like me? Hell, no.

• 11:21Caleb Hammer?

  No, you think I would take a guy like you?

• 11:23Speaker 04

  Absolutely. You need, we need a little personality.

• 11:26Caleb Hammer?

  If I presented myself I mean. Online to suggest that I would even come close to interacting with you in a professional manner.

• 11:33Speaker 04

  I'm sure I've, dude, I'm telling you, I consulted my magician on this. He said to me that if I come in with the swank, the dank, nothing but no stank, I'd come.

• 11:45Caleb Hammer?

  What are you talking about?

• 11:46Speaker 04

  I'm gonna get the job, man.

• 11:48Caleb Hammer?

  What is, what is a magi- what do you mean magician?

• 11:50Speaker 04

  It's like a palm reader, essentially, essentially someone that consults you and is telling you the future. He just said to be confident, look good, be happy.

• 11:59Caleb Hammer?

  Listen, I'm a college dropout, so it is not the indication of everything, but I have to ask your highest level of education.

• 12:04Speaker 04

  Um, I did high school, high school and I did.

• 12:06Caleb Hammer?

  Did you complete it?

• 12:07Speaker 04

  Mostly I got a pretty okay GPA.

• 12:11Caleb Hammer?

  Did you graduate?

• 12:11Speaker 04

  Um, I took three gym classes at the end of my.

• 12:13Caleb Hammer?

  Did you graduate?

• 12:14Speaker 04

  I did, yes.

• 12:17Speaker 04

  Do you think I didn't graduate? What the heck?

• 12:19Caleb Hammer?

  I'm asking you and I, it was hard to get an answer, surprisingly.

• 12:22Speaker 04

  Oh, really?

• 12:25Speaker 04

  I did two community college courses, though. That was the highlight of my career. I became Spanish club president.

• 12:30Caleb Hammer?

  The highlight of your career?

• 12:31Speaker 04

  You know what's funny is that I just realized this, that when I was Spanish club class president.

• 12:37Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy, I don't care. Shut the I actually really do not care. Shut up.

• 12:40Speaker 04

  I actually had a taco party.

• 12:42Caleb Hammer?

  Shut up. I'm being honest. Shut the up. You know, I don't give a about your Spanish club president.

• 12:47Speaker 04

  I mean, this is not an interview, isn't it? I mean, I want you to know my skills and where I come from, right?

• 12:52Caleb Hammer?

  A Spanish club president won't even be considered remotely a skill.

• 12:56Speaker 04

  We got a couple.

• 12:56Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the up.

• 12:58Speaker 04

  Spanish speaking people here.

• 13:00Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy, you have a lot of high interest debt.

• 13:02Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 13:02Caleb Hammer?

  Some family debt.

• 13:03Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 13:04Caleb Hammer?

  We're gonna talk about your money.

• 13:05Speaker 04

  Okay. What's going on?

• 13:07Caleb Hammer?

  Your income's a joke. I see your last payroll that hit. So you're not getting paid for this job that you're in now?

• 13:12Speaker 04

  No, because I have to make a deal first. Yeah.

• 13:16Caleb Hammer?

  What's a deal you have to make?

• 13:17Speaker 04

  I gotta make someone meet with the real estate agent and make them buy a house.

• 13:22Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, wait, they have to buy the house for?

• 13:24Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 13:24Caleb Hammer?

  So it's not them just meeting with the real estate agent?

• 13:27Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's essentially me calling them and if they buy a house.

• 13:30Caleb Hammer?

  Assistant?

• 13:30Speaker 04

  Essentially assistant. I mean, it's a

• 13:32Caleb Hammer?

  Why are you doing this instead of going working to the McD's, dude?

• 13:35Speaker 04

  McD's? Who wants to work at McD's, dude?

• 13:38Caleb Hammer?

  Nobody specifically, but you want to be able to pay rent, don't you?

• 13:41Speaker 04

  I've been doing good. I've been doing good so far. Have you not seen?

• 13:45Caleb Hammer?

  You just told me the

• 13:46Speaker 04

  I told you, luck is on my side.

• 13:48Caleb Hammer?

  You actual dumb motherfucker. You just told me at the beginning of this conversation.

• 13:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 13:51Caleb Hammer?

  That you're not gonna be able to pay rent at the end of the month or beginning of next month.

• 13:55Speaker 04

  I, God will figure out a way, man. I'm telling you what, this brain is filled with ideas and

• 13:59Caleb Hammer?

  But even in the most religious perspectives.

• 14:02Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 14:02Caleb Hammer?

  It is you putting in the effort to get there.

• 14:04Speaker 04

  Yeah, I mean, uh, God takes care of it. I mean,

• 14:07Caleb Hammer?

  No, it is you putting in the effort to get there, even in that religion.

• 14:11Speaker 04

  Are you sure? I mean,

• 14:12Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, it's like faith without actions is fucking bull.

• 14:15Speaker 04

  I don't know about that. I'll tell you what, man.

• 14:17Caleb Hammer?

  That's your own religion.

• 14:18Speaker 04

  I could close my eyes and I get this done. I'll tell you what.

• 14:21Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, tell me how you're getting it done.

• 14:22Speaker 04

  Um, I'm gonna find someone to, um, get a house and once they get the house.

• 14:28Caleb Hammer?

  No, no one's gonna buy a house in a couple of weeks.

• 14:30Speaker 04

  Are you sure?

• 14:31Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 14:32Speaker 04

  There's people like that everywhere.

• 14:33Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy.

• 14:34Speaker 04

  What about you? Are you looking, actually, actually, are you looking for a house?

• 14:36Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 14:37Speaker 04

  Why not? I thought you were into investment properties.

• 14:39Caleb Hammer?

  I

• 14:41Speaker 04

  Am?

• 14:41Caleb Hammer?

  You are.

• 14:42Speaker 04

  Cool.

• 14:43Caleb Hammer?

  The market's down right now in the stock market, so I'm investing as much money there as possible.

• 14:47Speaker 04

  So let me ask you, if the market was not down in terms of price, is that what's stopping you? Is that what's stopping you?

• 14:53Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not buying in Austin.

• 14:54Speaker 04

  You're not in Austin? We go as far as south.

• 14:56Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not buying investment properties in Austin that doesn't cash flow in Austin.

• 14:59Speaker 04

  Hey, you know where's the good cash flow market is right now? San Antonio, it's the number one city people are moving to in 2025. That's where the money's at. So Caleb, if you give me a couple of minutes, I'd love to propose you.

• 15:11Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, you're such an obnoxious, oh, you're so obnoxious. Shut the up. You're not gonna sell a house in a couple of weeks. One, people wanna look for a little bit, it's gonna take a minimum a month, and that's if they move quick. Two, if they're taking out a loan for the house, well, then they gotta negotiate the purchase price of the house, so let's call that a few weeks. Okay, cool. Cause no one, if they're getting an investment, they wanna go and get an actual good deal, which means they're probably gonna lowball and they're gonna have to, you know, fight to get to a reasonable number that they're gonna accept. And then if they're taking out a loan, you gotta take a.

• 15:41Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change, your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 15:53Caleb Hammer?

  Price and participation may vary, promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing. About another month, you know, go through that entire process, underwriting, and then you're gonna close the house, so you're looking at three months minimum, and that's moving kinda quick, so how are you paying rent again?

• 16:07Speaker 04

  Um, I'm paying rent by using the company credit card for chicken, and I exchanged that chicken for dollars, and I go on the street, sell the chicken, you know how like those people walk down the streets?

• 16:18Caleb Hammer?

  Is that true?

• 16:19Speaker 04

  I've done a couple of things I'm not too proud of, to be honest with you, I mean, I just get these ideas. I mean, I saw these people sell.

• 16:26Caleb Hammer?

  That sounds more interesting than anything you've said so far.

• 16:28Speaker 04

  I mean, these people are selling fruit in the street, and I was like.

• 16:30Caleb Hammer?

  What do you do that you're not so proud of?

• 16:33Speaker 04

  Uh, you don't wanna know about that.

• 16:34Caleb Hammer?

  I do, that's why I asked.

• 16:35Speaker 04

  You don't wanna know that.

• 16:36Caleb Hammer?

  I literally do, that sounds more interesting than any of the [BLEEP] you've been on this conversation so far.

• 16:41Speaker 04

  Look, I'll tell you, the networking opportunities in Austin are quite high, but the problem is that you gotta make something happen when it comes down to that, so.

• 16:50Caleb Hammer?

  Tell me, you're saying all these broad words leading to nothing.

• 16:55Speaker 04

  I don't know how I'm gonna bring this up, the.

• 16:56Caleb Hammer?

  Just [BLEEP] say it, you actual obnoxious human. Oh my [BLEEP].

• 17:01Speaker 04

  Okay. Oh, I'm not gonna make it through this. Okay. Here's what, here's what I like to do. So, um, when you're showing up to the ball, you know, you gotta look presentable. You can't show up solo, man. This ain't fucking high school. So what you gotta do, you gotta have a dime piece, to say the least. So, you know, I just go to some of these expensive restaurants and, uh, I invite, um, some pretty girls to come with me. And, uh, I asked them just to show their face, look pretty, look nice, and let daddy do the rest, you know? And while I'm doing that, I'm just getting more numbers and, uh, increasing my networking opportunity and dating opportunity. It's kind of a Wait, wait, wait. No, what are you talking about? Are you, are you serious? Are you, I heard about this before? Have you not, like? Heard about what before?

• 17:45Speaker 04

  Going to the ball and like getting some networking done? You know what I mean? Yeah, no, what, the dime piece? The dime piece, yeah. Like girls, you know what I mean? Like, you know, just going out and, uh, getting some pretty dates and going and, uh, How are you getting the pretty dates? Well, I mean, I had tax return and, uh, Huh? Buddy, everything you're saying makes no sense.

• 18:09Speaker 04

  Honestly, it sounds to me like you're paying women. I'm not necessarily paying women, but I'm more taking them on fancy dates to help me network. How are you meeting them? I'm meeting them through Tinder. I met one of them when I was at the club. Um, some of them actually live in my apartment building. You're bleeping me. I mean, they, they, they told me, you told them you're literally getting hook Hook? I don't know if I call them bleepers by any means, but- No, but you're literally paying women. They're, they're telling me right now. That's, okay, the prostitute. Hooker? There you go. Hot crook? A big Pro- Is that, do you like prostitute, Caleb? I've never had. Are you sure? I've never dabbled. Are you sure? Cause you seem to know a lot about this. I'm just curious, you know? Because this is the first I've heard about prostitute.

• 18:55Speaker 04

  Telling me that you told them beforehand that you have paid women for sex and showing up to meets. Oh, showing up to meets? The only meets I go to, baby, is at the club, okay? Yeah, no, the, the, no, no, the networking things and for sex. I mean, this ain't like some sex party. Hey, they're telling me you have told them that you pay women Uh huh. for intercourse. Fff, I don't pay for nothing. They pay for me.

• 19:23Caleb Hammer?

  So you're backtracking now that you're on camera?

• 19:27Speaker 04

  I don't necessarily think the word applies to the situation at hand here. I mean, maybe you might know a little bit more about than I do.

• 19:36Caleb Hammer?

  You are.

• 19:37Speaker 04

  Have you ever heard about taking out a girl at the ball? Have you ever done that before, Caleb?

• 19:40Caleb Hammer?

  At the ball?

• 19:41Speaker 04

  At the ball, you know what I'm talking about.

• 19:43Caleb Hammer?

  The bell of the ball.

• 19:44Speaker 04

  The bell of the ball, you know what I'm talking about there, Caleb?

• 19:47Caleb Hammer?

  I don't, I've never gone to the ball.

• 19:50Speaker 04

  The bell of the ball, you know what I'm saying? You know what I mean? Look at Jeff Bezos, you think that guy? You think Jeff Bezos with his pretty wife? You think he didn't have to pay her a little bit? Be like, hey, come on a date with me while I get some.

• 20:02Caleb Hammer?

  No, I don't think so. He's a billionaire, famous and well-known. I don't think he had to give money.

• 20:06Speaker 04

  I'm telling you.

• 20:07Caleb Hammer?

  They might hope that they get money and the lifestyle, but you don't have money. No, no, no, no, I want to hammer this down. Hey, shut the up.

• 20:14Speaker 04

  To be rich, you got to think rich.

• 20:15Caleb Hammer?

  I want to hammer this down. You're not even close to rich. You use a magician for your advice.

• 20:22Speaker 04

  You don't believe in magic, Caleb?

• 20:24Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my God.

• 20:24Speaker 04

  I'll tell you, magic is in sales, baby. And if you hire me right now, I promise you, I'll get every person in your seat.

• 20:30Caleb Hammer?

  Here's the thing.

• 20:32Caleb Hammer?

  We know that you have paid women and still do for intercourse.

• 20:38Speaker 04

  I wish.

• 20:39Caleb Hammer?

  No, we know that because you've told us that.

• 20:41Speaker 04

  I mean.

• 20:42Caleb Hammer?

  And you're backtracking that on camera. And not only that, your weird rebuttal to it because you don't know what to say is that women pay you for sex, meaning that you just said you're a prostitute.

• 20:53Speaker 04

  I mean, if you think about it, I am a prostitute. If you think about it, you want to know why, Caleb? You know why, Caleb? Because I exchanged my time for money, just like any prostitute would.

• 21:03Caleb Hammer?

  You have no money. I have your bank accounts.

• 21:10Speaker 04

  I do have money.

• 21:14Caleb Hammer?

  You do not have money.

• 21:16Speaker 04

  In the future, I do have money.

• 21:22Caleb Hammer?

  That doesn't make any fucking sense.

• 21:23Speaker 04

  It does.

• 21:24Caleb Hammer?

  You actual moron.

• 21:26Speaker 04

  I like to bring the past, the present and the future and I like to like bring them together. Just to get like even spread of life.

• 21:35Caleb Hammer?

  I'm just gonna use the notes from the conversation you had with them. Because you're incapable of sticking on a like conversational path. They said that you moved to Texas into a factory.

• 21:48Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 21:48Caleb Hammer?

  And you quote said, "I was expecting to do the job on day one, but you were grouped together with a bunch of trainees." And I don't know, took a bunch of sick days immediately and then you got fired after a couple of months or something.

• 22:04Speaker 04

  Yeah, no, I don't like to use the word fired. Yeah, I don't like the word fired. Fired is a bad word. I, I never got fired, actually. You know what happened? I did take some sick days because I needed a little excursion trip to Cabo San Lucas. I'm not sure if you've heard about this. You could use a vacation, Caleb. I don't know what you're talking about. I mean, don't you have some sick days to build up? I mean, this is your company after all. I would have unlimited PTO if I was you. I mean, we could talk about that when we get hired, when I get hired, obviously.

• 22:34Caleb Hammer?

  You would never, you will never be allowed to step foot in this building.

• 22:37Speaker 04

  We'll see about that. A great salesman knows how to change minds, people.

• 22:41Caleb Hammer?

  Please let Matt the security guard know.

• 22:43Speaker 04

  All right. Don't worry, I already paid Matt off. It was really easy.

• 22:48Caleb Hammer?

  Let's be real, if your private student loans have your eye on a third job at the local taco stand.

• 22:56Caleb Hammer?

  Maybe it's time for a better plan. Yrefi is your lifesaver in a sea of debt. Unlike the typical loan sharks who treat your credit score like a magical crystal ball. Yrefi cares if you actually want and can afford to repay. So forget about jumping through hoops and start jumping for joy at their under 6% interest rates. That's right, 6%, less than 6%. Plus, they've got a cosign a release program so you can finally give your mom a break from your financial baggage. So consider it your early Mother's Day or Father's Day gift. Offer a structured repayment plan to lower your monthly bill and personal reps who actually pick up the phone. It's no wonder why they've got a 4.6 star rating on Google.

• 23:39Caleb Hammer?

  Apparently treating partners like humans actually works wonders. So if you're sick of interest rates that are so high, they may as well charge you for oxygen. Y refi is your shot at a real solution. No more losing sleep and no more ignoring the mountain of student loan statements on your kitchen table. Go to Y R E F Y dot com slash hammer. That's Y refi dot com slash hammer or call triple eight Y refi dash 78. That is triple eight Y refi dash 78 and get out from under the weight of private student loans. Let's make your debt meltdown a distant memory, not a daily reality.

• 24:19Caleb Hammer?

  Keep going.

• 24:20Speaker 04

  Let's see. All right.

• 24:22Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you went to Cabo.

• 24:23Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 24:24Caleb Hammer?

  Immediately after getting hired at a job.

• 24:26Speaker 04

  Yes. I like Cabo. Cabo is great.

• 24:30Caleb Hammer?

  That's not what we're talking about. You actual. Oh, you're pathetic.

• 24:37Caleb Hammer?

  Are you proud of yourself?

• 24:38Speaker 04

  I actually quite am, you know.

• 24:40Caleb Hammer?

  How? In what world are you possibly proud of yourself? I would be so beyond embarrassed to exist in your skin.

• 24:51Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know what to do with you.

• 24:52Speaker 04

  Are you sure? Well, we'll get, let's get down to business, Caleb. You know, I'm a businessman of heart.

• 24:56Caleb Hammer?

  I've been trying. I'm talking about a job that you lost. We're going through your history. I need to get you into a job so you can pay rent. So one of the, the reason I'm talking about your past work and where your money is going. Because it's important to land you in a position where you might stay more than a couple of fucking months without getting fired from every damn job you've ever been in. In the history of your life, because you are a joke of a human being and have not progressed past the age of five.

• 25:21Speaker 04

  You know, I progressed past the age of four, according to my C H.

• 25:25Caleb Hammer?

  Not everything is a little joke. You, I, I, you would never even be considered for a job here.

• 25:31Speaker 04

  Are you sure about that, Caleb? Because I think I got, I got the resume ready for you. I got the resume.

• 25:36Caleb Hammer?

  You have a resume.

• 25:37Speaker 04

  I do. It's a great resume.

• 25:38Caleb Hammer?

  Give it to me.

• 25:39Speaker 04

  I mean, we'll have to send it to you on Gmail.

• 25:41Caleb Hammer?

  Give it to me. You have a phone, you actual dumb human.

• 25:46Speaker 04

  You could, all right, I'll send you the.

• 25:48Caleb Hammer?

  Pull out your phone, you.

• 25:52Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy.

• 25:53Speaker 04

  I like how far we're going.

• 25:54Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know how you exist. I don't know how you exist.

• 25:57Speaker 04

  They don't call me Rico Swire for nothing.

• 26:00Caleb Hammer?

  They don't call you that at all. We assigned you that name when you walked in. You're a moron.

• 26:06Speaker 04

  I'm gonna put the subject as your best hire and then we're gonna look back at this as a fond memory.

• 26:11Caleb Hammer?

  I'm looking on your phone. You are not sending me an email because I'm not giving you my email address.

• 26:16Speaker 04

  This, we'll use it for other purposes, you know?

• 26:18Caleb Hammer?

  Get me your phone. Pull it off you. No, your resume. I would just want to see your resume. Yes, you don't. What are we talking about?

• 26:26Speaker 04

  I was sending it to you, you know?

• 26:27Caleb Hammer?

  Shut up. You're never getting my contact. I never want it. I never want to interact with you again after this.

• 26:34Speaker 04

  We'll talk about it. Don't worry.

• 26:35Caleb Hammer?

  We will not. We will not. This will not be discussed.

• 26:38Speaker 04

  You don't know that. You don't know.

• 26:39Caleb Hammer?

  I do. I have control of my life.

• 26:42Speaker 04

  Let's look at my resume. Here we go. You're gonna like this one. Ready for that? Look how good that looks.

• 26:49Caleb Hammer?

  The fuck?

• 26:51Caleb Hammer?

  No, do you have like an actual like PDF?

• 26:54Speaker 04

  Let me look. A PDF. Yes, that's.

• 26:56Caleb Hammer?

  Our word document or something. He showed me, he's, he just gave me his Indeed profile.

• 27:05Speaker 04

  There we go. How's that look? Wait, I got two different resumes, so that's one of them.

• 27:09Caleb Hammer?

  Give me your preferred one.

• 27:10Speaker 04

  Um, this one probably is the real one, but.

• 27:16Speaker 04

  Let me see here.

• 27:20Speaker 04

  Yeah, this one works. Let's do this one. Alright, there you go. Feast your eyes and fantasize, Caleb. That's my resume.

• 27:27Caleb Hammer?

  Immediately with the page and the half, just like everyone on Financial Out of History.

• 27:32Speaker 04

  You only need a page and a half. The rest of it's my personality.

• 27:36Caleb Hammer?

  It's not the worst template. It's basic. It's easy. I like that. Um, says that you're still working in your last job. We know you're not.

• 27:45Speaker 04

  Um, that's a work in progress. I like to refer that as a template in the business I work in, AKA life.

• 27:55Caleb Hammer?

  People like this actually exist in the world, people. This is what we're dealing with. This is the collapse of our civilization before our eyes. Oh, it was at Tesla.

• 28:04Speaker 04

  Tesla, yes.

• 28:05Caleb Hammer?

  You got fired from Tesla.

• 28:06Speaker 04

  Um, I prefer the term let go.

• 28:09Caleb Hammer?

  Let go.

• 28:12Caleb Hammer?

  Utilizing effective communication skills to coordinate the timely delivery and organization of materials supporting. Oh, this is such fluff, such word. My goodness, people don't know how to make resumes.

• 28:23Speaker 04

  You're gonna be my boss anyways.

• 28:24Caleb Hammer?

  I don't even know what you did there.

• 28:26Speaker 04

  I mean, I was doing material handling. I was moving stuff, flexing around, looking good.

• 28:31Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I don't think you utilized effective communication skills to coordinate the timely delivery and organization of materials supporting efficient production of Tesla's vehicles and energy products. That is one bullet of three bullets on this, buddy. That's such bull. I would immediately click off and be like, what the I'm dealing with? Press operator, February 2024 to October 2024, full Scaramucci here. What were you doing?

• 28:57Speaker 04

  I was working, I was like making like pharmaceutical tablets.

• 29:01Caleb Hammer?

  Why is it press? Oh, you were pressing, yes. And I don't mean to press you there, Caleb.

• 29:10Speaker 04

  We're making like testosterone gel and stuff. They're making some pretty cool stuff there.

• 29:16Speaker 04

  Explains why I got all these muscles.

• 29:18Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy, you look like a fucking twink. You're just a little tall.

• 29:23Speaker 04

  Maybe you could use a little testosterone gel or something. I don't know. Maybe.

• 29:29Caleb Hammer?

  Lead machine operator. You were at that one for a while. How many of these did you get let go from?

• 29:36Speaker 04

  Um, well, those are just part. Honestly, there's another resume I have and I've gotten fired for probably like three or four jobs in Austin already, but I'm telling you.

• 29:45Caleb Hammer?

  That would not get you hired from a job.

• 29:47Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 29:48Caleb Hammer?

  You know what's funny? Lindsay, you all know Lindsay in the post show for those who are subscribed. One of the producers here. I had a nice long conversation with this guy before. She came to me before we filmed as he was like spreading chlamydia all over my bathroom walls. And he, she told me, this guy legitimately thinks he is going to impress you and get a job here before he leaves. He actually thinks this, this human being, light use of that term.

• 30:20Caleb Hammer?

  Actually thinks he was gonna walk away with the job here and he's talking about all these firing things. You're a pharmacy tech at some point, that scares the out of me.

• 30:27Speaker 04

  I mean, I was counting as much as I could over there.

• 30:30Caleb Hammer?

  I, I, I don't know how you've survived this far.

• 30:32Speaker 04

  Caleb, Caleb, I, I think the job just comes down to looks.

• 30:35Caleb Hammer?

  Nope, it doesn't. No one would see you when you work here, other than the coworkers.

• 30:40Speaker 04

  Imagine people saw my face and I had a sign that said-

• 30:42Caleb Hammer?

  Our sales job, no one will see your face.

• 30:44Speaker 04

  Why not? They gotta see the face.

• 30:46Caleb Hammer?

  No, they wouldn't.

• 30:47Speaker 04

  If you don't see the face, I mean, what the, what are we doing?

• 30:49Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy, oh, you're, you're actually-

• 30:51Speaker 04

  Buddy, I gotta teach you some things. I mean, this should be called financial.

• 30:55Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, so let's go over the person, let's, let's compete between the person with dollars and the one with, um, uh, 500 in his 401k.

• 31:04Speaker 04

  500 bucks, you know, after 30 years, that's gonna be like, what is it, like 2 million bucks or something?

• 31:11Speaker 04

  I mean, that, that money's there to stay.

• 31:13Caleb Hammer?

  That's got a spit take out of me.

• 31:15Speaker 04

  That's money to stay.

• 31:17Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my, okay, okay.

• 31:19Speaker 04

  Oh, my gosh, let's move on, please.

• 31:26Caleb Hammer?

  I'm just reading the notes because it's impossible to stay on track with you, but they're telling me-

• 31:33Speaker 04

  They're telling you.

• 31:33Caleb Hammer?

  From the conversation, yes.

• 31:35Speaker 04

  But who's they?

• 31:37Caleb Hammer?

  Literally the producers right next to you. You, are you stupid?

• 31:40Speaker 04

  Oh, I see, okay. I was like, who's talking to you? I mean, like, this is the first time we met and I was like, hey, what's up?

• 31:45Caleb Hammer?

  My magician.

• 31:48Speaker 04

  He knows you.

• 31:50Caleb Hammer?

  Hey, Pookie, our Memorial Day sale is happening right now and it's your shot to grab some of the tools you need to own your financial future. Yeah! And for 10 short days, May 23rd through midnight on June 2nd, every single one of our classes is discounted. Pick any individual course and slash 20% off, just $157 each. Or you could go all in with the complete Master Your Money bundle and save $237 at 30% off. So you can secure the core four courses at a massive discount. And inside, you'll find step-by-step lessons on budgeting, crushing debt, and beginner to advanced investing. Everything you need to start making smarter money moves today. And this deal disappears the moment the clock hits midnight on June 2nd.

• 32:35Caleb Hammer?

  Click the link in the description below, lock in those Memorial Day savings before they're gone. Take control of your financial future today. See you in the classes. They said that you're interested in joint Scientology or Mormonism.

• 32:49Speaker 04

  I thought about it, actually. Um, so if you look at Tom Cruise, for example, and all the crazy stuff he done, I think that's the way you get in. He's have to be, you have to be adrenaline. You gotta be, you gotta be after it.

• 33:00Caleb Hammer?

  And that you're also, but you stopped and you abandoned that instead to, end quote from you, chase MILFs lately.

• 33:07Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's it. Right there. Mamacitas, swavasitas. That's what I like to say. It's my favorite word these days.

• 33:16Caleb Hammer?

  That was multiple words, wasn't it?

• 33:17Speaker 04

  It was multiple words, but I like to conjoin it. It's called a compound word, Caleb. I know you dropped out of college, but that's something that they like to say, compound word.

• 33:26Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 33:26Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 33:29Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Now, before we move on, before we move on, I do want to press one more time before we get into these documents because what the?

• 33:40Speaker 04

  Let's see it.

• 33:41Caleb Hammer?

  I want you to admit what we already know.

• 33:44Speaker 04

  What's that?

• 33:45Caleb Hammer?

  That you spend money to women. You buy women's vaginas.

• 33:50Speaker 04

  I'll tell you this, Caleb. I'll tell you this.

• 33:52Caleb Hammer?

  Can you admit to it? Cause you admitted to it before.

• 33:54Speaker 04

  I'll tell you.

• 33:54Caleb Hammer?

  And you're nervous about being on camera now.

• 33:56Speaker 04

  I'll tell you this, Caleb.

• 33:57Caleb Hammer?

  Don't, why don't you just admit that you buy sex?

• 34:01Speaker 04

  I'll tell you this, Caleb. I'll tell you this. When these women meet me and they talk to me and they get to know me, they love me.

• 34:10Caleb Hammer?

  The pro-

• 34:11Speaker 04

  They get to see who I am as a person.

• 34:14Caleb Hammer?

  It's perspective.

• 34:14Speaker 04

  And they don't, they don't judge me on my resume.

• 34:17Caleb Hammer?

  Hey, can you confirm their prospective? Let's just call them then, like potential.

• 34:22Speaker 04

  I would call them.

• 34:23Caleb Hammer?

  Potential, I'm not even saying. But the potential.

• 34:27Speaker 04

  You could call them.

• 34:28Caleb Hammer?

  That's where their mind is originally and you're saying you convert them.

• 34:31Speaker 04

  Why do you like to call them so much? Are you, are you?

• 34:33Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, sex workers.

• 34:34Speaker 04

  Sex workers.

• 34:35Caleb Hammer?

  What term do you want to use?

• 34:36Speaker 04

  Mamacitas.

• 34:40Speaker 04

  Swavasitas. Again, with the compound word.

• 34:43Caleb Hammer?

  Lindsay, how, how, how much does he spend on? Cause I'm not gonna get an answer from him. What do we have? From our knowledge, how many? Does he get?

• 34:51Speaker 00

  Um, that's a Jake question.

• 34:53Caleb Hammer?

  Message Jake. What, what, what are we spending on prostitution?

• 34:56Speaker 04

  It looks like he wants to find out.

• 34:57Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the up. You're incapable of answering a question. You're no longer involved in this conversation.

• 35:02Speaker 00

  It's hard to tell, but I guess probably.

• 35:07Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so we're getting a lease in the last month that you spent 400 for sex once.

• 35:12Speaker 04

  I mean, I'm taking them on dates.

• 35:13Caleb Hammer?

  In a month. Yeah, we know you're paying for sex. Escorters, escorts, escorters. That's the word.

• 35:19Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 35:19Caleb Hammer?

  Those are the, you use the escort services.

• 35:21Speaker 04

  I would like to.

• 35:22Caleb Hammer?

  Correct?

• 35:23Speaker 04

  I will find out.

• 35:23Caleb Hammer?

  Can you confirm?

• 35:25Speaker 04

  I can't confirm nor deny that information, but I can say we had a great time.

• 35:33Caleb Hammer?

  And she walked away with money.

• 35:39Caleb Hammer?

  Hold that laugh. Okay. Oh, boy, buddy, where do you, I'm not gonna ask your Hammer financial score. If you want the, the quiz to assess where your finances are, go to CalebHammer.com.

• 35:48Speaker 04

  It has to be seven.

• 35:49Caleb Hammer?

  And you can come on the show by going to CalebHammer.com/apply. All the links are in the description. And if you don't want to end up like a guest on this show, all you have to do is download.

• 35:57Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change. Your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 36:09Caleb Hammer?

  Pricing participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing. My budgeting app. And remember, those who sign up for the annual version, get my budget friendly cookbook, signed by me, mailed directly to you. Check it out. All the links in the description below.

• 36:22Speaker 04

  Oh, you're a chef now.

• 36:24Caleb Hammer?

  We made a budget friendly cookbook because people ask how to stick to a budget on $300 a month for food, so we put it together.

• 36:29Speaker 04

  What's your favorite recipe?

• 36:31Caleb Hammer?

  From the cookbook?

• 36:32Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 36:32Caleb Hammer?

  I like the overnight oats personally. That is my breakfast in the morning. It's very simple and it's cost effective. It is nice and that is what I eat every morning.

• 36:39Speaker 04

  You put a little protein powder in there?

• 36:40Caleb Hammer?

  I, well, no.

• 36:42Speaker 04

  Why not? You gotta get the muscles, the muscles. How's Arnold Schwarzenegger saying it?

• 36:46Caleb Hammer?

  You don't, you, you're fit, but you don't look muscular.

• 36:49Speaker 04

  I mean, I haven't taken off the jacket yet.

• 36:52Caleb Hammer?

  Please don't.

• 36:54Caleb Hammer?

  Let's talk about your Delta's, uh, Sky Miles Gold Card.

• 36:57Speaker 04

  All right, let's take a look. What's going on there?

• 37:00Caleb Hammer?

  By the way, even with the month, we're looking at your last month where you made your full income.

• 37:05Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 37:05Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you still spent more than you made.

• 37:07Speaker 04

  I did?

• 37:08Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 37:08Speaker 04

  Well, that has to be.

• 37:09Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy, you're a joke.

• 37:10Speaker 04

  That has to be like, uh, a sign.

• 37:13Caleb Hammer?

  It's math. It has to be what?

• 37:15Speaker 04

  You gotta, you gotta spend money to make money.

• 37:18Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but you're spending more than you make.

• 37:19Speaker 04

  You gotta spend money to make money, Caleb.

• 37:21Caleb Hammer?

  This month, you're making zero.

• 37:23Speaker 04

  Don't you spend money to make money?

• 37:24Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, I properly invest correctly into employees that generate.

• 37:29Caleb Hammer?

  Good returns to the business and I invest money into the market or into real estate and it makes money and it's, you know, I've been very successful and blessed. Great, wonderful. I've been smart about it. You're a moron.

• 37:40Speaker 04

  I mean, going back to that.

• 37:42Caleb Hammer?

  Hey, you have fifty dollars.

• 37:44Speaker 04

  I think so.

• 37:45Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you have fifty dollars and your, sorry, five hundred dollars before I'm okay and your, your negative, your net worth is negative fourteen thousand dollars.

• 37:54Speaker 04

  Negative fourteen thousand dollars. That's not bad. Fourteen is actually my lucky number, you know? I think fourteen thousand dollars is really not that bad, Caleb. I mean, if you look at it.

• 38:02Caleb Hammer?

  But it's negative.

• 38:04Speaker 04

  Negative what? In terms of what?

• 38:05Caleb Hammer?

  Net worth. Your worth.

• 38:07Speaker 04

  Why does that matter?

• 38:09Caleb Hammer?

  You're talking about being rich and successful. Your net worth is what you calculate for wealth success.

• 38:15Speaker 04

  I mean, you could calculate worth by multiple two things. I counsel, I look at myself as a worth. Not like self-worth or like.

• 38:23Caleb Hammer?

  No, you're talking about being rich and successful.

• 38:25Speaker 04

  Obviously, yeah.

• 38:27Caleb Hammer?

  And that, your net worth is how you calculate that.

• 38:29Speaker 04

  Oh, okay.

• 38:30Caleb Hammer?

  Your net worth is negative fourteen thou- did you not know this?

• 38:33Speaker 04

  No, I just.

• 38:34Caleb Hammer?

  Are we starting from scratch here?

• 38:35Speaker 04

  A little bit, yeah.

• 38:36Caleb Hammer?

  Basic, bare, middle school minimum?

• 38:37Speaker 04

  Yeah, I mean, I'm, I always look in the mirror first, you know? I never look down. I always look at the mirror. Always look ahead is what they say. I think you should try that.

• 38:51Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, for fuck's sake.

• 38:55Caleb Hammer?

  Eight thousand fifty-five dollars. Do you know your parents?

• 38:59Speaker 04

  I think so, yeah. I know them.

• 39:01Caleb Hammer?

  What kind of answer is that? Can you just answer the question? Do you know your parents?

• 39:05Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 39:05Caleb Hammer?

  Are they embarrassed by your existence?

• 39:07Speaker 04

  Not really.

• 39:08Caleb Hammer?

  Do they talk to you?

• 39:09Speaker 04

  They do briefly. Oh, it's, it's, it's a quick conversation.

• 39:13Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah? How does it usually go, guy?

• 39:14Speaker 04

  It's usually like, hey, where's the monthly payment? And I'll tell them.

• 39:19Caleb Hammer?

  What? Monthly payment? Why would they be asking for?

• 39:22Speaker 04

  I.

• 39:22Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, buddy, that, oh my, what a joke. What a joke. What's happening?

• 39:28Speaker 04

  Being the youngest is not the easiest sometimes. You're the youngest. Don't you got siblings?

• 39:32Caleb Hammer?

  I'm the oldest and yes, I do.

• 39:34Speaker 04

  You definitely look like the oldest.

• 39:35Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, because I'm thirty.

• 39:37Speaker 04

  You're thirty?

• 39:38Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, yes.

• 39:39Speaker 04

  Okay, okay, alright, that's fine, okay, I just, just, just wanted to know, alright. Well, being the youngest is not the easiest Caleb, I'll tell you that, man.

• 39:47Caleb Hammer?

  Isn't it?

• 39:48Speaker 04

  The youngest-

• 39:49Caleb Hammer?

  Considered objectively the easiest?

• 39:51Speaker 04

  What, you've been watching Instagram? No, man, being the youngest is the hardest. I'm the, I'm the man of the family there Caleb, I got-

• 39:58Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 39:58Speaker 04

  I got all this pressure on me to be the best, I gotta, uh, worry about this, I gotta worry about making payments, I gotta worry about all this stuff.

• 40:05Caleb Hammer?

  You also have an identical fucking twin, so I don't know what the youngest thing you're talking about is.

• 40:09Speaker 04

  I, I'm better, I'm the better.

• 40:11Caleb Hammer?

  But that doesn't, you, it negates this whole little wah wah wah crybaby.

• 40:17Caleb Hammer?

  It's like a copy and paste laugh.

• 40:19Speaker 04

  A copy and paste laugh?

• 40:20Caleb Hammer?

  You're laughing like, look to the side is the exact same.

• 40:23Speaker 04

  I've never seen you laugh, when, when do you laugh?

• 40:25Caleb Hammer?

  Maybe if you say something funny.

• 40:26Speaker 04

  When do you laugh?

• 40:27Caleb Hammer?

  When someone says something funny.

• 40:28Speaker 04

  Like, your Tinder profile?

• 40:32Caleb Hammer?

  I don't have a Tinder profile.

• 40:34Speaker 04

  That makes sense, did you get banned?

• 40:36Caleb Hammer?

  No, well, temporarily, actually.

• 40:38Speaker 04

  You got banned temporarily?

• 40:39Caleb Hammer?

  It got reversed, it was some dumb-

• 40:41Speaker 04

  Was, like, this, you know?

• 40:42Caleb Hammer?

  It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter, but I'm not on them anymore because I'm-

• 40:46Speaker 04

  Banned.

• 40:47Caleb Hammer?

  Not banned, that was reversed.

• 40:50Speaker 04

  Okay, that's right.

• 40:51Caleb Hammer?

  But because I have a more, a long-term thing.

• 40:54Speaker 04

  Long-term thing?

• 40:55Caleb Hammer?

  Long-term thing that I'm not paying for.

• 40:57Speaker 04

  Oh, okay, I see, oh, but you're probably still using like, you know, those like Christian Mingle, what are you on, Farmers Only?

• 41:04Caleb Hammer?

  I just said I have a long-term thing, are you-

• 41:07Speaker 04

  What did you mean by long-term thing?

• 41:09Caleb Hammer?

  I'm seeing someone.

• 41:11Speaker 04

  Oh, really?

• 41:12Caleb Hammer?

  Yes!

• 41:13Speaker 04

  Like a therapist?

• 41:17Caleb Hammer?

  Eight thousand fifty-five dollars, forty-nine cents on Delta SkyMiles Gold Card, with two hundred seventy dollars a month and sixty-one cents for your minimum payment, I don't know how the f- you're even gonna come close to paying for that. New charge is seven hundred ninety-five dollars and sixty-six cents, probably because you just don't have money, don't have money, so you have to charge through the credit card, it's above the credit card limit!

• 41:37Speaker 04

  You don't care about the credit card limit, you only care about the interest limit, that's what I care about.

• 41:42Caleb Hammer?

  Interest limit?

• 41:43Speaker 04

  Interest limits.

• 41:44Caleb Hammer?

  That's not a term!

• 41:45Speaker 04

  Market research. Look it up.

• 41:47Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 41:48Speaker 04

  You're telling me you don't know nothing about this? I thought you were the financial guru.

• 41:52Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, please educate me. I want to hear this. Educate me on the market research.

• 41:57Speaker 04

  The market research says you get a credit card that has a 0% APR. And, um, you know, once that baby gets maxed out, or did get maxed out, um, you find ways to pay it off. You do a transfer balance. Uh, you know, in the business, we call that a balance transfer.

• 42:13Caleb Hammer?

  It's okay for this to be maxed out as long as there's zero interest.

• 42:16Speaker 04

  I think it expired.

• 42:18Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, I was gonna say interest is accruing.

• 42:20Speaker 04

  Yeah, I mean, when did that happen?

• 42:23Caleb Hammer?

  Pathetic excuse of a man.

• 42:24Speaker 04

  When did that happen?

• 42:25Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know. You should know. These are your accounts. $190.21 of interest is accruing. So you're...

• 42:33Speaker 04

  That's a lot.

• 42:36Speaker 04

  I better get this job.

• 42:38Caleb Hammer?

  What job?

• 42:38Speaker 04

  Your job. The job you hired me for. I mean...

• 42:45Speaker 04

  I like your shirt, by the way.

• 42:46Caleb Hammer?

  Shut up.

• 42:47Speaker 04

  Uh, you know what's funny is that I feel like you look at me like that cactus.

• 42:54Speaker 04

  You think so? I mean, I can use a little hair and makeup, but I mean, that's, that's okay.

• 43:02Caleb Hammer?

  Um,

• 43:04Caleb Hammer?

  your entire market research, as you said,

• 43:06Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 43:07Caleb Hammer?

  suggests that this is okay as long as it's a 0%, but it's not. And you're above the credit card limit, which means when fees start accruing, how long does this take to pay off if you do not purchase on it and you only put your minimum monthly payment towards it?

• 43:18Speaker 04

  Oh, God.

• 43:19Caleb Hammer?

  Which you're incapable of not purchasing on it.

• 43:21Speaker 04

  I mean, if we're using dog years...

• 43:22Caleb Hammer?

  How long in human years?

• 43:24Speaker 04

  Human years? Hmm, well, that guy's still trying to live forever.

• 43:27Caleb Hammer?

  How long?

• 43:29Speaker 04

  I'm trying to think, uh, two days, three days, tops. Because once I get that job, you're gonna see how well I can sell.

• 43:35Caleb Hammer?

  You're not listening to my question. My question was if you only put minimum monthly payments towards it and you did not purchase on it, how long does it take to pay off? Now, if you get a job and put a lump sum down, which by the way, you don't all of a sudden get $8,000. 60 years?

• 43:50Speaker 04

  Six years.

• 43:51Caleb Hammer?

  Six years?

• 43:51Speaker 04

  Yeah, I mean, yeah.

• 43:52Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, it takes 20 years, so you'll be 43. You'll be 43.

• 43:55Speaker 04

  Damn.

• 43:56Caleb Hammer?

  And still a joke.

• 43:57Speaker 04

  You'll be good looking, though, at least. I mean,

• 43:59Caleb Hammer?

  I don't...

• 43:59Speaker 04

  Can you say the same thing about yourself?

• 44:01Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know. I'm okay.

• 44:02Speaker 04

  Okay, this, alright.

• 44:06Speaker 04

  I'm just asking, you know, I mean, sometimes people have a little confidence issue and you know, sometimes I like to-

• 44:10Caleb Hammer?

  I'm okay, again.

• 44:12Speaker 04

  I do personal training on the side, so if you know, you need somebody, I could-

• 44:15Caleb Hammer?

  No, I wouldn't trust you to train a single thing.

• 44:17Speaker 04

  I could be the in-office trainer, Caleb.

• 44:19Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 44:19Speaker 04

  I could get a little Pilates studio in here.

• 44:21Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 44:22Speaker 04

  I get like, everyone, arms up, let's go, let's go, let's go.

• 44:25Caleb Hammer?

  You bring in prostitutes and fuck them in our bathroom.

• 44:27Speaker 04

  One, two, three, four, five, and she actually says the same thing too, one, two, three, four, five, and you can-

• 44:32Caleb Hammer?

  Who the prostitute?

• 44:33Speaker 04

  Moving on, um, I could be that, uh, personal trainer for the team, the best team. We would be winning, like, no one in business.

• 44:41Caleb Hammer?

  We already are winning.

• 44:42Speaker 04

  Yeah, I'm here already.

• 44:43Caleb Hammer?

  We keep A players, we get rid of B players.

• 44:45Speaker 04

  B players.

• 44:46Caleb Hammer?

  We win. Yeah, you're an E player.

• 44:48Speaker 04

  E player, E for everybody?

• 44:53Caleb Hammer?

  For god's sake, man. The fact that, the, the fact that you are, this is you as a genuine human, you are never gonna make it anywhere in life, you are not. You are an actual, I need you to know that you are a joke, not as an insult, but as a hopeful revelation to, you're not cute, in terms of your personality, you are not successful, you are not respected, no one looks upon you and says, wow, that is someone I aspire to be. Li- listen, the comments are probably tearing you apart, and typically, I would say, don't.

• 45:26Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 45:27Caleb Hammer?

  And typically, I would tell you not to look at the comments. I think you should look at the comments and use them as a work, wake up call. That you are an actual joke, and you put yourself up here, and I need you to realize that you are rock bottom of humanity, so that you can hopefully wake yourself up.

• 45:41Speaker 04

  I'll tell you what, the comment section, people are gonna wanna laugh at you first before they laugh at themselves. And what I say to you, Caleb, is that I hope that comment se- that comment section tears you up as well, because we're going down together, baby. We're in this together, Batman and Robin.

• 45:56Caleb Hammer?

  What are they tearing me down for?

• 45:56Speaker 04

  Batman and Robin.

• 45:57Caleb Hammer?

  What are they tearing me down for?

• 45:59Speaker 04

  I don't know, I mean, we're Batman and Robin, we're on this together, aren't we?

• 46:02Caleb Hammer?

  No, not at all.

• 46:03Speaker 04

  Are we not on this together, Caleb?

• 46:04Caleb Hammer?

  No, not at all.

• 46:05Speaker 04

  I thought you were my fucking Titanic here, man. I thought you were there. I thought you were gonna be like, the fuck, you know, the fuck, you're gonna be like, the, also the Rico Suave.

• 46:13Caleb Hammer?

  I'm happy to support you- And give you the resources and give you a budget and give you what I would personally do to get out of this situation. But I think you're so far gone as an existing human on this planet that I don't know what to do. Your personality is.

• 46:29Speaker 04

  Are you serious? You're gonna wanna see me working McDonald's handing french fries?

• 46:32Caleb Hammer?

  I wanna see you pay bills. Why do you look down upon them? Who the fuck are you to look down upon people?

• 46:37Speaker 04

  Mickey Daze.

• 46:38Caleb Hammer?

  No one. You're making ends meet.

• 46:40Speaker 04

  Ends meet for, for what? The french fry bag?

• 46:43Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 46:44Speaker 04

  From the fries to the bag is the ends of the meat?

• 46:46Caleb Hammer?

  You to look down upon them. What a disgusting human you are.

• 46:49Speaker 04

  I mean, what about you? What do you, you look like you probably go there fucking every day.

• 46:53Caleb Hammer?

  I love McDonald's. I'm a fat fuck. I don't look down upon workers. I don't look down upon someone who's going out and grinding to put food on the table for their family.

• 47:01Speaker 04

  Section. Does he look down upon workers? And here comes in like all the, all the little frames and stuff. You know what I mean?

• 47:08Caleb Hammer?

  Navigating insurance feels like trying to read ancient texts, except the stakes are your health and your wallet. All that paperwork, phone calls, deciphering and decoding coverage details and curbing the we'll get back to you emails. It can be so draining and it scares away people from getting care in the first place. Today's sponsor, Ro, solves all of that. Ro's free insurance checker makes the process insanely easy. And I really wish Ro had been around earlier because it would have saved me a ton of time and stress. If you're looking into GLP-1 meds like Ozempic or Wegovy, Ro checks your coverage upfront. You just upload your insurance card and they'll handle the rest. Seriously, that is it.

• 47:50Caleb Hammer?

  And if you're eligible, they'll send back a full report of your coverage so that you can make the right decision for you, your body, your goals and your budget. Plus, if you've got any questions, Ro connects you directly with a provider, no runaround. Over 500,000 people have already used Ro to check on their coverage and now you can too. So take the first step and head to ro.co slash Caleb to see if you're covered. That is ro.co slash Caleb. And before you do, make sure you go to ro.co slash safety for black box warning and full safety information about GLP-1 medication. Let's get back to the episode. You know what's harder than budgeting on a tight paycheck? Budgeting time to cook a decent meal. And that's why I started using Factor, today's sponsor.

• 48:35Caleb Hammer?

  And honestly, I should have done this way sooner. Factor is my not so secret weapon for surviving my busy weeks without falling into the black hole of overpriced takeout. And these meals, fresh, not frozen, chef crafted, dietitian approved, and most importantly, ready in just two minutes. Literally pop it in, heat it, and boom! Gourmet lunch, zero dishes, zero chopping and wondering if you burnt it too much. You pick from over 35 meal options every week. Keto, calorie smart, vegan, protein plus, all that. Factor is so flexible, I can easily adjust my order size for when the whole crew needs dinner, or even skip a week when I have a special event. Oh, and it doesn't stop there. They've got snacks, breakfast, smoothies, juices, and even little bites for those moments when I'm running late

• 49:20Caleb Hammer?

  and still need to look like I've got it all together. And spoiler, I don't, but Factor makes it look like I do. And if you're wondering about cleanups, there's none, seriously. No greasy pans, no crusty cutting boards, no forgotten Tupperware science experiments. You just heat, eat, and go back to ruling your financial empire or watching cat videos. And I'm not judging. So head to factor75.com and use code 50HAMMER to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first Factor box. That is code 50HAMMER at factor75.com to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. Click the link below, treat yourself to food that doesn't taste like sadness. And now that I'm all fed, let's get back to the video. I have no idea what you're talking about.

• 50:05Caleb Hammer?

  No, I don't. I don't look down upon people going out to put food on their table for the family.

• 50:10Speaker 04

  I don't, but I just don't, I just don't want that type of job, Caleb. I mean, that's not a fun job.

• 50:15Caleb Hammer?

  It might not be a choice.

• 50:16Speaker 04

  I got, I got other jobs, though, man.

• 50:18Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, and you're converting it into zero dollars.

• 50:19Speaker 04

  Fries in the bag, that's, we'll wait till 40 if I get there and then I'll start saying that.

• 50:24Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think you will, you're gonna be fucking overdosed under a bridge.

• 50:27Speaker 04

  I mean, at least I'll have you there with me, right?

• 50:29Caleb Hammer?

  No, do you, dude? No, I don't do.

• 50:32Speaker 04

  We know you.

• 50:33Caleb Hammer?

  I do that.

• 50:34Speaker 04

  I do.

• 50:35Caleb Hammer?

  On your old company's credit card.

• 50:36Speaker 04

  Um, medicinal.

• 50:38Caleb Hammer?

  You went in, you got some BS from the gas station, went in, got some BS. Oh, my. Went in. What are you stopping in and getting the gas station for a few bucks? What are you getting?

• 50:45Speaker 04

  I mean, I get. Get some booze, you know, I just say, I drink a six pack, but I.

• 50:50Caleb Hammer?

  A booze, booze.

• 50:51Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 50:52Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, car wash, which we live in Austin, there's really no need. Locos Sports. Locos.

• 50:57Speaker 04

  Locos, oh my God, that's the best in place on the planet, dude. It's like Hooters, but like Mexican. It is the best in place on the planet. That's where the mamacitas are. If you go there, oh my God, dude. Hooters should have just rebranded to, to Hooters de Loca, because this is the beautiful place to go.

• 51:17Caleb Hammer?

  All right, Shringalaw New Something, Shre- uh, Shren- Shangree- Shangru- oh, man. A restaurant, Head Shop on Wheels, Halal Zone.

• 51:29Speaker 04

  Halal Zone, that's right.

• 51:30Caleb Hammer?

  Booze and Firehouse Lounge, Firehouse Lounge, The Austin Shaker, Friends Bar, Kung Fu Salon.

• 51:39Speaker 04

  Kung Fu Saloon, that's where I remember. I remember that place. Beautiful place. A lot of karate going on there.

• 51:45Caleb Hammer?

  Booze and booze, Pete Terry's, this is, this is on a credit card.

• 51:49Speaker 04

  Yeah, I feel like you like Pete Terry's. Like Pete Terry's?

• 51:51Caleb Hammer?

  Pete Terry's is fine.

• 51:52Speaker 04

  You like it? What's better? Pete Terry's, McDonald's? What's your choice? Best hamburger in the world? Three, two, one.

• 51:57Caleb Hammer?

  Well, Pete Terry's probably has a better hamburger, but I do like the taste of McDonald's.

• 52:00Speaker 04

  McDonald's is okay. I mean, I don't.

• 52:02Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, it's like a creation. It's like a science, right?

• 52:04Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 52:04Caleb Hammer?

  The Cavalier.

• 52:06Speaker 04

  Cavalier, they got some good beef tala fries. That's the only reason why I go there.

• 52:10Caleb Hammer?

  Lift DoorDash, Hawaiian A and A B.

• 52:13Speaker 04

  I thought that was supposed to be on the company credit card.

• 52:15Caleb Hammer?

  Lift, lift.

• 52:16Speaker 04

  Was that, that's supposed to be on the company credit card? The Hawaiian?

• 52:19Caleb Hammer?

  Booze, booze and Vietnamese restaurant, Halal Shop, Firehouse Lounge, Ro Polo's Pizzeria, Taco Bell, Love Shop, Axon Mobile, Uber Trip, Tacos, Regios, El Vapor, uh, Dama Botanicals.

• 52:39Caleb Hammer?

  Symposium Industries, I don't even know. Botanicals, oh, that's T H C A M.

• 52:45Speaker 04

  Medicinal, medicinal.

• 52:47Caleb Hammer?

  Amazon, Kitten Vending, Amazon, Sunco Get, oh, well, that's booze and liquor. Uh, Betty Machine, Vending, and Prime Video Channels. Very good.

• 52:57Speaker 04

  At least it's Prime Video Channels, Caleb. Prime Video Channels.

• 53:01Caleb Hammer?

  Interest $190 charged.

• 53:05Caleb Hammer?

  And that's happened twice this year so far, so interest probably ended a couple of months ago. And it's at 29% interest.

• 53:12Speaker 04

  29%? Man, I'm getting, I'm kinda getting reams in the backend there, if you know what I mean.

• 53:20Caleb Hammer?

  Should I pay for that too?

• 53:21Speaker 04

  Uh.

• 53:24Speaker 04

  No, you do, actually.

• 53:26Caleb Hammer?

  I, I like how everything I say to him, it's like, no, you. That's, that's your mental capacity. It's just. They. I'm rubber, you're glue, everything bounces off to me and sticks to you.

• 53:39Speaker 04

  You know what they say, Caleb? You point one finger at me, it's five back at yourself. That's what they say, Caleb. But this mean I don't want a job.

• 53:49Caleb Hammer?

  What, they say, they say you're looking to move to Mexico, maybe?

• 53:52Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 53:53Caleb Hammer?

  Can you, can you even speak Spanish?

• 53:55Speaker 04

  I know, I know my, my way, my way around. I know a little bit. I know a little mamacita, suavecita, uno cerveza, a little, you know? I got enough looks as it is, you don't even speak Spanish.

• 54:07Caleb Hammer?

  Donde se ruen todos los pumas?

• 54:11Speaker 04

  I don't know where you said, but where's something? I don't know where to tell you.

• 54:15Caleb Hammer?

  You're gonna need that one there.

• 54:17Speaker 04

  What's that? What is, I mean, I'll tell you.

• 54:19Caleb Hammer?

  Where do all the cougars congregate?

• 54:20Speaker 04

  Oh, seriously? I'm gonna keep that one. That's good to know. I know that one too. Do you know Spanish, Caleb? You look like you're Hispanic, you know?

• 54:28Caleb Hammer?

  Nope, 25% native.

• 54:29Speaker 04

  25% native? What tribe?

• 54:32Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know, that's why I couldn't get free college.

• 54:34Speaker 04

  Is it the Angry Tribe?

• 54:39Caleb Hammer?

  I might struggle with this one, but no tengo dinero para el Aquiliar.

• 54:44Speaker 04

  Shut up. I already know what that means.

• 54:46Caleb Hammer?

  Pero pagate el doble el próximo mes.

• 54:51Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah, I already know what that means.

• 54:52Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, what does it mean? You're gonna have to say it a lot.

• 54:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, it means.

• 54:57Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, cuz you've said it many times in your life, right?

• 54:59Speaker 04

  It means, hey, um, where are the beautiful girls to hook up with? I don't know word for word, but I know exactly what you said.

• 55:08Caleb Hammer?

  Name and no, it's I don't have money for rent. Can I pay you double next month instead?

• 55:12Speaker 04

  Oh, that's what I meant? Oh, that's good. I thought it meant something else, to be honest.

• 55:18Speaker 04

  Well, Spanish comes with time, Caleb, and you know this. I mean, first grade wasn't taught in a year. It took two years, okay?

• 55:29Caleb Hammer?

  Donde puedo encounter un prestamo de día de pago?

• 55:35Speaker 04

  I don't know what that means.

• 55:36Caleb Hammer?

  Do you know any Spanish? And you're actually gonna move to Mexico?

• 55:39Speaker 04

  I know a bit of Spanish. I mean, I'm.

• 55:40Caleb Hammer?

  It's where I can find the payday loan. Where can I find the payday loan?

• 55:45Speaker 04

  I mean, I know a bit of Spanish. It's always been in my heart. I love Spanish music. I love Spanish women, especially the Montecitos.

• 55:51Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you've said that like 10 times. My goodness, you're a

• 55:54Speaker 04

  Mexico is great. You know how expensive it is to be in America now? It's ridiculous.

• 55:58Caleb Hammer?

  But that's also why our incomes are higher.

• 56:01Speaker 04

  I mean, yeah, I mean, incomes are higher, but so is the work time. I mean, how often are you working, Caleb?

• 56:07Caleb Hammer?

  We work a lot. I work a lot.

• 56:08Speaker 04

  You do? How many hours? 60 hours?

• 56:09Caleb Hammer?

  I don't count my hours.

• 56:10Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change. Your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 56:22Speaker 01

  Price and participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.

• 56:25Speaker 04

  Well, it'd be easier to have someone take a little load off you, Caleb.

• 56:28Caleb Hammer?

  We are hiring out our managers.

• 56:30Speaker 04

  Funny thing is, you'll actually have to pay for that load to be taken off you, if you know what I mean?

• 56:33Caleb Hammer?

  Pay our managers.

• 56:34Speaker 04

  You'll pay me to come work for you instead, Caleb. I'm gonna

• 56:41Caleb Hammer?

  Before you leave this building.

• 56:44Caleb Hammer?

  Buddy, normally I'd offer a course career certification. I just don't think you'd make it through it.

• 56:47Speaker 04

  Our course careers, what are we talking, architecture? Are we talking sales? What are we doing?

• 56:51Caleb Hammer?

  There is tech sales in there.

• 56:52Speaker 04

  Tech sales. I could sell some.

• 56:54Caleb Hammer?

  One thousand forty-five dollars and ninety-three cents.

• 56:58Speaker 04

  Damn.

• 56:58Caleb Hammer?

  On this blue cash everyday card with forty-one dollars and ninety-one cents for the minimum monthly payment. Hundred fifty-six dollars purchases. Shocker. Over the credit card limit. Extra shocker. Who would have thought? Three years to pay off minimum only.

• 57:12Speaker 04

  Jesus.

• 57:13Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 57:16Caleb Hammer?

  What is going on with this card?

• 57:18Speaker 04

  What, what card? The blue one?

• 57:19Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 57:20Speaker 04

  I.

• 57:22Caleb Hammer?

  What are you doing to me? Yes, it is blue cash every day.

• 57:25Speaker 04

  Oh, the boo, the blue cash every day. I mean, that's like the, the, the, the booze, the budget, the, the essentials.

• 57:32Caleb Hammer?

  That was on the last card.

• 57:34Speaker 04

  That was also incorporated in the budget, Caleb. I mean, I'm telling you.

• 57:38Caleb Hammer?

  You don't, I mean, you spent more than you made. You don't know what budget is. You've never heard the word budget in your life.

• 57:42Speaker 04

  You gotta spend money to make money.

• 57:44Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, what money are you making? You're just getting booze, liquor, restaurants.

• 57:46Speaker 04

  I mean, I got some, I got some stuff on the side.

• 57:48Caleb Hammer?

  How would you tell me? Tell me.

• 57:50Speaker 04

  Okay, well, I got a friend that's, um, you know, I got fired from my job last week or whatever.

• 57:55Caleb Hammer?

  We know.

• 57:56Speaker 04

  I know. I actually found someone that does very similar business or he's gonna be Airbnb manager. That's right. Looking at.

• 58:03Caleb Hammer?

  No one's gonna trust you for that.

• 58:04Speaker 04

  You, you're not gonna see, they're not gonna see my face. They're gonna see the, the building.

• 58:08Caleb Hammer?

  You have a friend?

• 58:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, I have a friend.

• 58:10Caleb Hammer?

  Cool, call him right now.

• 58:11Speaker 04

  I'll call him, I'll call him.

• 58:11Caleb Hammer?

  Call him right now and ask, ask if he's seriously considering you for the job. Hundred percent honest. Put him on speakerphone, put the mic to here.

• 58:17Speaker 04

  Let's do it. I'll call him right now.

• 58:20Caleb Hammer?

  Cause I wouldn't even come close. Maybe we'll conduct a formal job interview in the post-show.

• 58:25Speaker 04

  You'll like me, I promise you that. This guy likes me.

• 58:28Caleb Hammer?

  You are literally the opposite.

• 58:31Speaker 04

  He's from the Speakerphone right here. Speakerphone right here. Put the mic here. Oh, hey. The bottom of the phone. Hey, hey, what's up dude? Um, yo, you're

• 58:43Speaker 04

  Yo, so you're gonna consider me actually hiring me for the, the job, right? Airbnb job, right?

• 58:47Speaker 05

  Well, I'm gonna connect you to the owner. They're looking for somebody because the current, oh, manager lives in College Station. So he needs somebody.

• 58:56Speaker 04

  He does. Does he need someone this week, right?

• 59:00Speaker 05

  I don't know. All I, all I'm gonna be able to do is just connect you with him and then you speak and whatever. Tom, yeah.

• 59:05Speaker 04

  Yeah, you tell him.

• 59:05Speaker 05

  Yeah, I get you.

• 59:06Speaker 04

  You tell him I'm the best, I'm on the most on time, I'm the most responsible. Tom, I'm gonna get everything figured out. Um, can I ask why, why are you considering me by chance? Why do you wanna consider me?

• 59:18Speaker 05

  Um, you're just the only person that I, that seemed interested, so.

• 59:24Speaker 05

  I don't, I don't wanna lead like anybody.

• 59:25Speaker 04

  How much are you gonna pay me, by the way?

• 59:28Speaker 05

  I'm not paying you again. He's the one that's working with you. So what it is, remember how I get paid.

• 59:33Speaker 04

  How much?

• 59:33Speaker 05

  Percentage of what it is.

• 59:35Speaker 04

  Do you know how much that, if you can guess? Sorry, cut you off.

• 59:37Speaker 05

  That's, that's something that you have to speak to him.

• 59:40Speaker 04

  How many hours a week?

• 59:40Speaker 05

  Negotiate about.

• 59:41Speaker 04

  And like

• 59:42Speaker 05

  Say, tell him, hey, 10% or something like.

• 59:45Speaker 04

  10%? How many hours do you think that 10% gets me?

• 59:48Speaker 05

  Dude, you probably won't be working much. You know, once you got a system automated and, you know, you're probably at, at most 20 hours a month.

• 59:57Speaker 04

  20 hours a month?

• 59:59Speaker 05

  Yeah, like I said, once you have a system in place, like you're calling the, the housekeeper, you know who to call if something breaks, you really won't be doing much.

• 1:00:08Speaker 04

  Can I, um, sorry to cut you off again, um, quick question. Do you know, I'm, cause I'm worried about paying rent, obviously. Do you know, like, if I'm about to do this, um, is this also like a side gig you'd consider? Is this enough to make money on? To live on?

• 1:00:23Speaker 05

  So you'll make, like, also both houses, you'll make, like, maybe 500 each? Like, 400 to 500 dollars each, but that's mostly. So it's like a little side hustle. Like, if you had a job and also this, you'll, you'll, you'll make enough.

• 1:00:35Speaker 04

  Okay, so you're saying there's enough money to make? Okay, I like that. I like that. I like to sound that. All right, I'll, I'll talk to you later, okay? Well, send my phone number for me and make sure you give him a, a headshot too of me, okay? I want him to know I look good.

• 1:00:49Speaker 05

  Yeah, I don't think he cares about that. He cares more if you could like, you know, soft problems.

• 1:00:53Speaker 04

  You never know, some, some, you never know, you never know he's gay or not, you know? I was just, you know, you've been fired from four jobs. I was, you know, and then he doesn't care though. I got fired from the last, like, the last company, right? Cause I got fired. He doesn't care?

• 1:01:07Speaker 05

  A couple of jobs?

• 1:01:08Speaker 04

  Yeah, I got fired.

• 1:01:09Speaker 05

  Oh, wow.

• 1:01:10Speaker 04

  I bought chicken nuggets the other day. They like, were like, fear, and fucking mad about that. On the company card. On the company card. They were mad about that. I tried to refund it, but...

• 1:01:19Speaker 05

  You're messy.

• 1:01:20Speaker 04

  Dude, I'm not even joking with you, man. And I, I got, I was like, you know, I wanted some Chick-fil-A and they, dude, they were mad. I don't know what to say. You've been fired from other jobs, too. And, uh, I got fired from a couple of other jobs, too. So, I wanna make sure this is...

• 1:01:33Speaker 05

  This is the thing. It's not, this is not a job. You can't see it as a job, right? This is more like a side business, like, uh, like, you know, some extra money. It's not like a job. There's no application.

• 1:01:44Speaker 04

  I mean, I'm telling you, man. I can make this work. I can make this, we're gonna conquer Austin. We're gonna become the high rises. We're gonna become the, the buildings. We're gonna take over the industry, man. I mean, we're gonna have to do a little name change, but we're gonna become the best. We're gonna conquer.

• 1:02:00Speaker 05

  I really hope you like, you know, start your own stuff.

• 1:02:02Speaker 04

  Dude, I'm telling you, man. I'm fucking ready for this. We're gonna conquer the Southwest, baby. They're gonna call us the Southwest whatevers, you know? We got this. I'll talk to you later. Alright, see you later, homes.

• 1:02:18Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Okay. How long are you gonna last in this job?

• 1:02:22Speaker 04

  Dude, I am fierce. I'm fierce.

• 1:02:24Caleb Hammer?

  So, it sounds like you can only make a thousand dollars a month?

• 1:02:26Speaker 04

  I mean, a thousand bucks is better than nothing.

• 1:02:28Caleb Hammer?

  What's your rent?

• 1:02:29Speaker 04

  Twelve hundred bucks. I mean, this is where you come into play, Caleb, because...

• 1:02:34Caleb Hammer?

  And what's the name change gonna be?

• 1:02:35Speaker 04

  Uh, you know, oh, Southwest Tweety's. I like the sound of that. Southwest Tweety's. Southways Tweety's.

• 1:02:42Caleb Hammer?

  Get, just getting cleaners? Just getting cleaners?

• 1:02:45Speaker 04

  I'm, I'm coordinated, man. I'm, I'm telling you, I'm, I'm, I'm built for this. I coordinate with the housekeeping. You know, I get to practice my Spanish. You know, I get to coordinate with the guests. You know, I'm just gonna be on this. They're gonna see my face. They're gonna see everything they love about me. And I'm gonna see myself, too, obviously. How's that sound Caleb? Look, I'm hireable.

• 1:03:03Caleb Hammer?

  Sounds like you won't last long.

• 1:03:05Speaker 04

  I'm very hireable Caleb.

• 1:03:06Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, Uber, Uber, Uber.

• 1:03:08Speaker 04

  I'm here. Don't drunk drive.

• 1:03:11Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, Texas tag, the tolls.

• 1:03:14Speaker 04

  That, I'm not paying tolls ever again.

• 1:03:15Caleb Hammer?

  It's a 0% interest until you're never paying tolls again.

• 1:03:19Speaker 04

  Never, never. It's a waste of time. I thought this was the free state.

• 1:03:22Caleb Hammer?

  It's gonna fuck your credit though. They'll put it to collections.

• 1:03:24Speaker 04

  They will?

• 1:03:25Caleb Hammer?

  It's, it's the, you have the freedom to choose if you get on the toll road state.

• 1:03:29Speaker 04

  I mean, can't you just cover your license plate? I mean.

• 1:03:31Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, and get prosecuted, yes.

• 1:03:33Speaker 04

  Oh prosecuted. I don't like the sound prosecuted. I like the other word that sounds close to it, but we don't have to talk about that.

• 1:03:39Caleb Hammer?

  We know that.

• 1:03:40Speaker 04

  We don't have to talk about that.

• 1:03:41Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, the credit, the, it, the, it's literally the interest free period on this card that is over the balance.

• 1:03:47Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:03:48Caleb Hammer?

  Or the limit is ending in about four months.

• 1:03:52Speaker 04

  Oh shit. Four months?

• 1:03:54Caleb Hammer?

  Yep, four months.

• 1:03:54Speaker 04

  Well, guess how much money I'm gonna have by then?

• 1:03:56Caleb Hammer?

  Zero.

• 1:03:57Speaker 04

  Four thousand bucks. I'll be able to pay off that credit card.

• 1:04:01Caleb Hammer?

  How will you have four thousand dollars?

• 1:04:02Speaker 04

  Cause the Airbnb job, man.

• 1:04:04Caleb Hammer?

  You make a thousand dollars a month, but you have to pay for rent and food and utilities and your bills and your minimum monthly payments.

• 1:04:09Speaker 04

  Well, that's if I don't get evicted. If I get evicted though, I mean, I don't have to pay rent.

• 1:04:13Caleb Hammer?

  What's your living situation gonna be if you're evicted though?

• 1:04:16Speaker 04

  Um.

• 1:04:16Caleb Hammer?

  You gonna live in your car?

• 1:04:17Speaker 04

  I mean, I might have to come here to Hammer Studios.

• 1:04:19Caleb Hammer?

  No, no, no.

• 1:04:21Speaker 04

  No?

• 1:04:22Caleb Hammer?

  Nope.

• 1:04:22Speaker 04

  I mean, you guys got a huge, huge area here, you know? I mean, don't you know the, the homeless people out here Caleb? I thought you were telling me all about the workers saying, I don't care about them. You don't care about the homeless. I mean, I'm not saying homeless.

• 1:04:33Caleb Hammer?

  But I don't think.

• 1:04:34Speaker 04

  Take refuge here.

• 1:04:36Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think that's the best use of our.

• 1:04:37Speaker 04

  I'll clean up. I'll, I'll take a shower. They have a shower here by the way.

• 1:04:40Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, I know. We have a shower in my office.

• 1:04:42Speaker 04

  Yeah, I got, I got some cologne you can use too. You could use a little cologne, but.

• 1:04:45Caleb Hammer?

  Do I stink?

• 1:04:46Speaker 04

  You like Armani?

• 1:04:47Caleb Hammer?

  No, I have Tom Ford on right now.

• 1:04:49Speaker 04

  Tom Ford?

• 1:04:50Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, it smells quite nice.

• 1:04:51Speaker 04

  I mean, Tom Ford's okay, but you gotta get like a younger brand, you know? Tom Ford.

• 1:04:54Caleb Hammer?

  I just, I like the smell of the specific one I've picked.

• 1:04:57Speaker 04

  He did? Where'd he go? Centbird or where'd he go?

• 1:05:00Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, I, I don't remember where I got it from, but now I just ordered it online.

• 1:05:04Speaker 04

  Okay, I see. Well, what happens if you had someone do that for you, Caleb?

• 1:05:08Caleb Hammer?

  It sounds like a waste of money. Oh my, how do I get sucked into that? How have, how have you sucked me into that conversation? I'm not going down your rabbit holes. Capital one.

• 1:05:17Speaker 04

  Capital uno, that's right. See, I'm practicing, I'm learning.

• 1:05:20Caleb Hammer?

  One.

• 1:05:24Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, well, okay. Hmm, is this usually paid off? Cause the balance is like nothing, but uh, well, actually you won't be able to pay it off.

• 1:05:32Speaker 04

  No.

• 1:05:33Caleb Hammer?

  So it's a, it's a $29, $25 minimum payment. But you won't be able to pay this off because you don't make money right now, which typically we do. Typically that's illegal. We don't, we don't allow people to come on the show if they don't make money, but you got fired in between the process of accepting you on the job and coming out.

• 1:05:51Speaker 04

  But you just saw there Caleb that I was, I was about, I got a job Caleb.

• 1:05:55Caleb Hammer?

  Right on the air. I got a job Caleb. No, he that, but me, you're gonna talk after. He said it's not a job.

• 1:06:00Speaker 04

  He, he can define, I like to, I like to switch terms around Caleb. Okay?

• 1:06:04Caleb Hammer?

  I'm sure.

• 1:06:05Speaker 04

  I'm, I'm, I'm exclusive that way.

• 1:06:06Caleb Hammer?

  $326 on this card.

• 1:06:09Speaker 04

  Oh, $320.

• 1:06:11Caleb Hammer?

  Again, it's been booze and booze and bullshit.

• 1:06:17Caleb Hammer?

  DoorDash, Prime Video, Popeyes, Pteris, Torches, Bat City pies, Uber, Trip, Amazon. You're spending all your money that you do not have. And you're spending money to make money. You don't invest in anything business related. You don't invest in anything self-help related, any education, any kind of resources. You just invest in booze, food.

• 1:06:35Speaker 04

  I mean, you do too, right?

• 1:06:37Caleb Hammer?

  I can afford it. I put it in a budget and I don't get booze or, but I do get food.

• 1:06:41Speaker 04

  You do put it on a credit card though, right?

• 1:06:42Caleb Hammer?

  And pay it off every single month. You have balances on these cards and you also don't have an income. I do.

• 1:06:47Speaker 04

  Okay. Well, look at this, this way Caleb. Credit cards are uh, way to hold your money, just like a bank account.

• 1:06:54Caleb Hammer?

  No. You know, I'm gonna allow you to try to explain this. Sure, go ahead.

• 1:06:58Speaker 04

  If, you know, I kind of get something to eat, for example, the Bat City pies, you know, I'm, I'm just holding my money into that credit card.

• 1:07:05Caleb Hammer?

  That doesn't make sense. How are you holding your money on that card?

• 1:07:07Speaker 04

  Holding it.

• 1:07:08Caleb Hammer?

  Explain how that makes sense. Please explain a logic.

• 1:07:10Speaker 04

  Instead of spending the $32 for pizza.

• 1:07:13Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 1:07:13Speaker 04

  I'm, I'm putting it on.

• 1:07:15Caleb Hammer?

  You don't have that much in your checking account.

• 1:07:16Speaker 04

  On a plastic credit card. I'm holding it.

• 1:07:18Caleb Hammer?

  But you don't even have that money in your checking account.

• 1:07:20Speaker 04

  But you don't even have that money in your checking account to spend. It frees me up.

• 1:07:22Caleb Hammer?

  No, no, no. You didn't have the option to spend that in your checking account because you didn't have the money there.

• 1:07:27Speaker 04

  Why does that matter?

• 1:07:28Caleb Hammer?

  Because it's not a fucking hold. You're not holding money from, from your checking account by putting it on a credit card instead. You didn't have the money in the checking account.

• 1:07:35Speaker 04

  Well, it's holding something. I'll tell you that.

• 1:07:36Caleb Hammer?

  It's not holding. There's no money there that's being hold. Help!

• 1:07:39Speaker 04

  Oh, the pizza's being hauled, is that what you're saying?

• 1:07:41Caleb Hammer?

  No, huh?

• 1:07:42Speaker 04

  The pizza? Because I ordered the pizza and I held it on a credit card.

• 1:07:46Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, you are draining my mental energy way too early in here.

• 1:07:50Speaker 04

  Okay, let's see. I mean, I'll tell you what, if I had other places to hold the pizza, I would.

• 1:07:56Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:07:57Speaker 04

  Maybe you could hold me a pizza.

• 1:07:58Caleb Hammer?

  I'm reading a weird note right now, I'm reading a weird, weird note. Well, they said your 401K was sixteen thousand dollars, but I see in the notes it's five hundred right now.

• 1:08:06Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 1:08:08Caleb Hammer?

  Did you cash out your 401K?

• 1:08:09Speaker 04

  Um, you know.

• 1:08:10Caleb Hammer?

  When? There's nothing to show for it, there's no savings anywhere, there's no money anywhere!

• 1:08:14Speaker 04

  Market downturn, market downturn and, uh, tax return.

• 1:08:18Caleb Hammer?

  So you sold when it went low?

• 1:08:19Speaker 04

  I got, my taxes, big taxes.

• 1:08:22Caleb Hammer?

  What? Tell me, anything!

• 1:08:25Speaker 04

  I, I, uh...

• 1:08:27Caleb Hammer?

  Tell me anything, you fucking moron, please, tell me anything that makes sense.

• 1:08:31Speaker 04

  Okay, let me try to be coherent for this, Caleb, right? So, I was living in Phoenix and, uh, I was doing super well in that city, so I moved back, and when I moved back, tax return came, I owed four thousand bucks.

• 1:08:44Caleb Hammer?

  It's not a tax return, but yes.

• 1:08:46Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah. Um, so...

• 1:08:48Caleb Hammer?

  Four thousand dollars because you were doing a lot of contracting work and you...

• 1:08:50Speaker 04

  Yeah, that was, and I got fired from a couple of jobs in Phoenix too. I mean, I just, I'm on a big roll here.

• 1:08:56Caleb Hammer?

  You don't think you have to pay taxes?

• 1:08:58Speaker 04

  Nobody does, I mean, why do we have to anyways? I thought this was a free country. I mean, anyone else think like that too? I mean, you gotta pay taxes.

• 1:09:06Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, the Supreme Court and like the, uh, I think it was the thirty said that income, or twenty said that the income tax is constitutional.

• 1:09:12Speaker 04

  We gotta revisit that, I mean, I don't really agree with that.

• 1:09:14Caleb Hammer?

  Well, no one likes taxes.

• 1:09:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, nobody does, especially this guy, or in this guy, you know, Batman and Robin.

• 1:09:20Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I'm sure I pay a lot more in taxes than you, but...

• 1:09:22Speaker 04

  Yeah?

• 1:09:23Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I, because I actually pay mine.

• 1:09:25Speaker 04

  Yeah?

• 1:09:25Caleb Hammer?

  But either way, four thousand dollars, that's like thirty percent call, I mean, you still barely made any money probably, but, yes, I'm sure you had just contracting roles, just like you're doing with this job.

• 1:09:35Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:09:36Caleb Hammer?

  And you didn't say anything cited for taxes. When you, when you're just a standard nine to five, whatever job in your W2, that stuff is withheld for you, so you don't have to worry about it. But when it comes to these contract jobs where you're, you're your own business, you have to do that for yourself instead.

• 1:09:50Speaker 04

  Really?

• 1:09:51Caleb Hammer?

  You know, oh my gosh, we're really starting from zero.

• 1:09:53Speaker 04

  I was under the assumption that you can just like...

• 1:09:56Caleb Hammer?

  Under the assumption?

• 1:09:56Speaker 04

  Like, just like, hold all your money to yourself. And going back to a holding term, I like that term a lot.

• 1:10:02Caleb Hammer?

  But then you have to pay the taxes.

• 1:10:04Speaker 04

  I mean, why?

• 1:10:05Caleb Hammer?

  Quarterly or annually.

• 1:10:06Speaker 04

  Well, can't you like...

• 1:10:06Caleb Hammer?

  Because you owe them.

• 1:10:08Speaker 04

  I mean, I could deduct it.

• 1:10:09Caleb Hammer?

  What would you be deducting?

• 1:10:10Speaker 04

  My drive here, the, the.

• 1:10:12Caleb Hammer?

  It wasn't for business?

• 1:10:14Speaker 04

  It was, I'm on a business mission right now, Caleb. I'm on business right now.

• 1:10:18Caleb Hammer?

  IRS, please look into this guy. I'm calling it right here. I know you're in the comments.

• 1:10:22Speaker 04

  Oh, man. Who do you think is winning right now, me or him? I think me, based on looks.

• 1:10:27Caleb Hammer?

  In what?

• 1:10:28Speaker 04

  Looks, you know?

• 1:10:29Caleb Hammer?

  But winning what?

• 1:10:31Speaker 04

  We both have the same shirt, though. I like the shirt. You got a good color there. The cactus.

• 1:10:35Caleb Hammer?

  We're not in a competition for anything. What are you winning?

• 1:10:38Speaker 04

  I thought this was like, I don't know, I don't know, I thought we were, I don't know. I'm just saying I'm the better looking one.

• 1:10:44Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, yes, you're, you're more fit.

• 1:10:46Speaker 04

  Thank you.

• 1:10:47Caleb Hammer?

  For sure.

• 1:10:47Speaker 04

  You're good looking, too.

• 1:10:48Caleb Hammer?

  And you're younger.

• 1:10:49Speaker 04

  Thank you.

• 1:10:49Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I mean, I'm certainly not ugly, but I definitely could lose weight, that's for sure.

• 1:10:54Speaker 04

  I can help you with that.

• 1:10:55Caleb Hammer?

  I just don't want to interact with you, so no.

• 1:10:57Speaker 04

  I'll tell you what, imagine me running behind you, telling you all about my financial problems. You could probably run four or five miles a day.

• 1:11:06Caleb Hammer?

  They're telling me you pitched them on an idea where I have a competition for who pays off their debt the best? I don't know what the best means, and the reward is a vacation. They assume you want to compete in that.

• 1:11:20Speaker 04

  Yes, yes.

• 1:11:21Caleb Hammer?

  But what does being paid off the debt the best mean?

• 1:11:25Speaker 04

  Here's the idea. It's like, almost like a game show. Like, all of the people on Financial Audit, whoever can sign up and commit to paying off the debt, whoever comes out on top, gets to go to Cabo.

• 1:11:36Caleb Hammer?

  The rest of them do that on their own because they're adults.

• 1:11:39Speaker 04

  All-inclusive, and I get to select the location, of course, because I'm going to win.

• 1:11:42Caleb Hammer?

  Is that where your favorite prostitutes are? I don't know. I've never been to Cabo.

• 1:11:44Speaker 04

  You haven't been there? You got to check it out. It's quite, quite fun, to be honest.

• 1:11:49Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not really a drinker, like you, though. That's not my lifestyle.

• 1:11:52Speaker 04

  You don't like that? I mean, I'm telling you, you got to be free spirited, Caleb. You got to let go a little bit.

• 1:11:56Caleb Hammer?

  No, it's not my vibe. I have an addictive personality, so I know not to really get into that.

• 1:11:59Speaker 04

  What is addictive personality mean?

• 1:12:00Caleb Hammer?

  I fall into habits and addictions very easily.

• 1:12:02Speaker 04

  So you're admitting you're a user?

• 1:12:04Caleb Hammer?

  No, I specifically stay away.

• 1:12:07Speaker 04

  Caleb, as soon as I walked in the building there, I saw your eyes. You looked out of it. I was like concerned.

• 1:12:12Caleb Hammer?

  I'm tired. I am tired today.

• 1:12:13Speaker 04

  You're tired? Okay.

• 1:12:14Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, I didn't sleep very well.

• 1:12:15Speaker 04

  I'm, I'm just going to jot that down.

• 1:12:17Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:12:20Caleb Hammer?

  Well, what, to see if I get the job?

• 1:12:24Caleb Hammer?

  So, I still don't know what paying off the debt the best is, yeah?

• 1:12:29Speaker 04

  Okay, get down back to business.

• 1:12:32Caleb Hammer?

  All right, you wrote a parable for the application.

• 1:12:35Speaker 04

  A parable?

• 1:12:36Caleb Hammer?

  For your application, for your job application.

• 1:12:38Speaker 04

  This is my favorite.

• 1:12:39Caleb Hammer?

  I'm allowing you to actually do this, and yes, I have to say once again, this is a hundred percent real. A hundred percent real.

• 1:12:50Speaker 04

  All right.

• 1:12:51Caleb Hammer?

  And it fucking blows my mind, and go ahead, I haven't heard this, but it just blows my mind that you are an actual human that exists like this and you think it's a good thing.

• 1:12:58Speaker 04

  Okay, "Once upon a time in a cozy village nestled between whispering woods and a sugar dusted hills, there lived a curious little boy named Luigi. Luigi had a wild imagination, a big heart, and an even bigger craving for cookies. One sunny afternoon Luigi wandered into the village bakery. The scent of warm cinnamon melting chocolate and buttery dough swirled through the air like a spell. His eyes sparkled at the sight of the golden cookies stacked high behind the glass. But when he reached into his pocket, oh no, he did not have enough coins to even buy one. He ran to his mother with hopeful eyes and asked gently, 'Mama, may I have some coins for the cookies?' She smiled and said, 'Not today, my love.'

• 1:13:41Speaker 04

  Just as Luigi turned away with a heavy heart, a man appeared in a coat made of patchwork felt and shoes that twinkled like stars. I saw what happened to man, Saint Kylie. I'll make you a deal, little dreamer. I'll give you all the cookies you, your heart desires. All I ask for is one small nickel each time you borrow a cookie, that's it." Luigi, Luigi's eyes lit up like fireflies. 'Deal!' he said. And so began the sweetest chapter of Luigi's life. He, he munched on cookies morning, noon, and night. He learned everything there was to know about cookies, the flavors, the bacon, even the business. He grew around and jol, he, he grew round and jolly and, and wise in the ways of sweets.

• 1:14:25Speaker 04

  But one day, as he flipped through the pages of his cookie ledger, he gasped. He owed more nickels than there was stars in the sky. The weight of the cookie debt grew so heavy, he felt like dunking his head into a giant bowl of steaming milk and floating away. Understandable. And in the moment, Luigi learned a lesson that stuck harder than the caramel on a cold spoon. Magic cookies are sweet, but borrowed bites are, can lead to bitter crumbs. So dear children, never borrow what you can't repay, especially when cookies are involved. The end.

• 1:14:59Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, great. So you wrote that, but you don't live by it, not for a single second.

• 1:15:03Speaker 04

  I, I dream by it.

• 1:15:04Caleb Hammer?

  So what the are you talking about? That is the most pointless bullshit because you don't do anything. Why, why be an inspirational person that publishes all this stuff and then doesn't do it?

• 1:15:16Speaker 04

  I mean, I'll tell you, because dreaming is better than doing sometimes.

• 1:15:19Caleb Hammer?

  No, it's, when?

• 1:15:20Speaker 04

  Because it's the goal, it's the idea.

• 1:15:23Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but a goal without actions is nothing.

• 1:15:24Speaker 04

  If you don't have no North Star, how are you gonna walk towards it?

• 1:15:27Caleb Hammer?

  But you don't follow it.

• 1:15:28Speaker 04

  The North Star takes time.

• 1:15:29Caleb Hammer?

  No, you see the North Star and then you avoided it at all costs.

• 1:15:32Speaker 04

  It's just like the, the bear says, the lessons learned once the cookie debt's too big. In this case.

• 1:15:37Caleb Hammer?

  Your cookie debt is too big. And you have no fucking nickels.

• 1:15:41Speaker 04

  I got a couple bites left.

• 1:15:42Caleb Hammer?

  You have no nickels.

• 1:15:43Speaker 04

  You got a couple nickels.

• 1:15:44Caleb Hammer?

  No, you have nothing. You literally make zero nickels a month.

• 1:15:48Speaker 04

  Once again, we have a job offer.

• 1:15:51Caleb Hammer?

  Kind of, they specifically said it's not a job. You're gonna have to be the one out there hustling, working 20 hours a month for $2,000. Good luck.

• 1:16:00Speaker 04

  That's good. Look how good that would be in Mexico. That's amazing, dude. I could rent a villa for that. You could come join me. We could do a financial audit in Mexico. We could actually interview Mexicans over there.

• 1:16:11Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the up.

• 1:16:13Speaker 04

  That could be a cool job.

• 1:16:15Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, I just gotta move forward, man. I gotta get through this. You're a horrendous existence on this planet.

• 1:16:24Caleb Hammer?

  And.

• 1:16:26Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change, your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just five dollars, only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 1:16:38Speaker 01

  Pricing participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.

• 1:16:41Caleb Hammer?

  The fact that you're like proud of this existence kills me. Normally, this is also when I recommend the fizz card or Sander mine for therapy, but again,

• 1:16:51Caleb Hammer?

  I don't want to put a therapist through talking with you and I don't want you to get anywhere near a fizz card. You're, that's funny?

• 1:16:58Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's kind of funny. You could have the therapist, it's okay.

• 1:17:02Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the fuck up, I already do. Power play.

• 1:17:06Caleb Hammer?

  What is this? Power pay?

• 1:17:07Speaker 04

  Power pay. Oh, that's a, that's a good question, Caleb. Well, I got a little work done, to say the least. A little work done, a little tweaking, a little, little, little.

• 1:17:14Caleb Hammer?

  To you?

• 1:17:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, a little maintenance.

• 1:17:16Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 1:17:17Speaker 04

  It was called cool sculpting. Have you heard about this term?

• 1:17:19Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 1:17:20Speaker 04

  It's pretty much to make your, um, your, uh, the fat on your body, especially for males, because we get fat on our, our abs and our love handles. Uh, they use like a freeze gun and they like stick it on your fat and it like literally melts the fat away from you using like sub zero temperatures. So I got that procedure done and I'm waiting on my next. Yeah, I'm waiting for my next session at the end of the month.

• 1:17:44Caleb Hammer?

  How much did you lose?

• 1:17:45Speaker 04

  Um, I'm actually pretty much gonna have abs at the end of this.

• 1:17:49Caleb Hammer?

  No, how much did you lose so far?

• 1:17:50Speaker 04

  Lose what?

• 1:17:51Caleb Hammer?

  Session. The fat.

• 1:17:53Speaker 04

  The fat? Oh, pretty good. Like I was already in good shape.

• 1:17:56Caleb Hammer?

  How much did you lose?

• 1:17:57Speaker 04

  What do you mean lose?

• 1:17:58Caleb Hammer?

  The fat!

• 1:17:59Speaker 04

  The fat?

• 1:18:00Caleb Hammer?

  You paid for the procedure to lose the fat. How much did you lose?

• 1:18:03Speaker 04

  I don't know, probably like five, 10 pounds or something.

• 1:18:07Caleb Hammer?

  Really?

• 1:18:07Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:18:08Caleb Hammer?

  Hey guys, always ask me, Caleb, what do you invest in? Honestly, I keep it pretty boring. Take a look at this, take a look at this. This is my investments right here. And this is why you gotta follow me on Blossom if you want to see just that. A couple of weeks back, I stumbled upon this social investing app called Blossom and thought, all right, let's give it a try. And it turns out it's actually really cool. And to be clear, they're not a brokerage. Blossom is a completely free social media platform. They're not your typical investing app. It's social, meaning you can follow exactly what I'm investing in and you can check out my portfolio in real time and even discuss strategies with me and other investors. There's no guessing games, just clear transparency. So if you're curious about how I'm investing

• 1:18:52Caleb Hammer?

  or just wanna get smarter with your money, download Blossom right now and you can follow me at Caleb Hammer. I'll be sharing my exact portfolio breakdown, investing tips, even responding to your questions. It's totally free, super simple, and way more fun than just guessing stocks alone. So hit that link below, join me on Blossom, and let's grow our money together. Seriously, right now, you can actually see what my portfolio looks like today. I don't believe you.

• 1:19:16Speaker 04

  Yeah, I can recommend you. I mean, I got.

• 1:19:18Caleb Hammer?

  If it was real, I'd use it because I got some, but I don't believe you or trust you.

• 1:19:22Speaker 04

  Extremely painful. You might wanna get some weed with it because like they'll stick this thing on you and just like, you're like dying there on the chair and like you have all this like lube it on you and you're like, oh my god.

• 1:19:33Caleb Hammer?

  For how long?

• 1:19:33Speaker 04

  It's like four hours.

• 1:19:35Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, nevermind. $2,657.65 is what's owed for this. You borrowed it at a 15% interest rate for this fucking freeze.

• 1:19:43Speaker 04

  Hey, you know, I did that right, though, because they asked me who was in my household. I would have gone a better interest rate, but I said I lived alone. So I was, I was a good person. I do live alone.

• 1:19:56Caleb Hammer?

  So you just answered, you just answered the question. Okay.

• 1:19:59Speaker 04

  I said, I'm an honest guy, Caleb. That's why you gotta hire me, baby.

• 1:20:02Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, okay. You need to be honest to yourself about how much of a joke you are. Oh, it was an ad on Instagram. Great. Okay. $65.62 a month.

• 1:20:12Speaker 04

  65% off, actually. 65% off the procedure.

• 1:20:14Caleb Hammer?

  65% off, yes. $65.62 is your minimum payment. This is gonna be paid off and basically never with that minimum payment and with the interest rate attached to it. Good fucking luck, dude. What a joke.

• 1:20:27Speaker 04

  I could get you.

• 1:20:28Caleb Hammer?

  You're a joooooo.

• 1:20:30Speaker 04

  Do you wanna meet with Dr.?

• 1:20:32Caleb Hammer?

  Nope.

• 1:20:32Speaker 04

  No? She would like to consult with you.

• 1:20:35Caleb Hammer?

  Don't give a [bleep]. Not getting you whatever commission you're gonna get for that.

• 1:20:39Speaker 04

  I mean, it'd be good.

• 1:20:39Caleb Hammer?

  Truth in London. Okay, yeah, uh, from Lead Bank. For what? What is this for?

• 1:20:45Speaker 04

  Lead Bank. Oh, I think that's my real estate license. I'm trying to get my real estate license.

• 1:20:49Caleb Hammer?

  30% interest rate? What?

• 1:20:50Speaker 04

  Wait, is that 30% interest rate?

• 1:20:52Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you [bleep].

• 1:20:52Speaker 04

  How much is it per month?

• 1:20:53Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, 26, 20.

• 1:20:56Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah, that's the real estate license, yeah. That's with a firm, though, but.

• 1:20:59Caleb Hammer?

  You find it? Oh, you're a fir- this is a [bleep]. You affirmed a real estate license?

• 1:21:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, I did.

• 1:21:04Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, balance, uh, three fourteen.

• 1:21:07Speaker 04

  I'm gonna become the best apartment locator the cities have seen.

• 1:21:10Caleb Hammer?

  You're just helping people find apartments?

• 1:21:12Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's apartment locating, baby. It's working around.

• 1:21:14Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think people really do that much in Austin. It's not New York or San Francisco.

• 1:21:18Speaker 04

  I am telling you, I use an apartment locator.

• 1:21:20Caleb Hammer?

  Just go on Zillow.

• 1:21:21Speaker 04

  You don't need Zillow, you need me. That's what you need, Caleb.

• 1:21:24Caleb Hammer?

  Use you. Someone that's slower than them.

• 1:21:27Speaker 04

  That's a, that's a good question because Caleb, there's a lot, there's a lot on your plate, Caleb, you know? You know, there's places to live, there's places to see, there's so many things to go to, but the problem is that you don't have time to figure out what you need. And so when you got a guy like me on your back.

• 1:21:41Caleb Hammer?

  A moron?

• 1:21:42Speaker 04

  Yeah. No, no, not a moron. And when you got someone like me, I'm there taking care of you, Caleb. I'm looking for the deals. I'm finding you the special places, man.

• 1:21:51Caleb Hammer?

  You're also dealing with other clients. I would rather look at my own pace and go on Zillow and see a thousand apartments in one day.

• 1:21:56Speaker 04

  Are you serious, Caleb?

• 1:21:57Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:58Speaker 04

  That's not effective, man. That's not effective.

• 1:22:00Caleb Hammer?

  Been pretty okay with, um, my housing situations in my life.

• 1:22:03Speaker 04

  Are you sure?

• 1:22:03Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 1:22:04Speaker 04

  It could be better, though. I mean.

• 1:22:05Caleb Hammer?

  I don't think so.

• 1:22:06Speaker 04

  What's the biggest thing you've looked for in your house?

• 1:22:08Caleb Hammer?

  What's your real estate portfolio worth?

• 1:22:10Speaker 04

  Um, four dollars.

• 1:22:11Caleb Hammer?

  Off then.

• 1:22:14Speaker 04

  I mean, I can help you, Caleb. I'm telling you, even finding a house is not as simple as people think it is.

• 1:22:19Caleb Hammer?

  I think I do pretty okay.

• 1:22:21Speaker 04

  How do you find your house?

• 1:22:22Caleb Hammer?

  What's your real estate portfolio worth?

• 1:22:24Speaker 04

  Nine dollars.

• 1:22:25Caleb Hammer?

  Off.

• 1:22:26Speaker 04

  You see how big it is?

• 1:22:27Caleb Hammer?

  We're not comparable.

• 1:22:28Speaker 04

  You're not comparable because you haven't worked with me yet.

• 1:22:31Caleb Hammer?

  I don't play the big dick contest because I don't care about that kind of, that's not what I do. However, if you're gonna come here and say that you are the authoritative figure on this, I'm gonna pull the big dick on it, okay?

• 1:22:42Speaker 04

  Really? It doesn't look that big.

• 1:22:46Caleb Hammer?

  What, what, I don't know what, I don't know what you're talking about, man. Again, you're doing the rubber glue thing. It's so silly.

• 1:22:52Speaker 04

  Yeah, I mean, I mean.

• 1:22:53Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the up. You are an actual elementary schooler.

• 1:22:56Speaker 04

  I did graduate elementary school. I know the song too at my elementary school. It's pretty cool. I love that song.

• 1:23:02Caleb Hammer?

  I do like to work with that. Not any life skills.

• 1:23:06Caleb Hammer?

  Except good looks.

• 1:23:07Speaker 04

  Charm.

• 1:23:07Caleb Hammer?

  Standard life skill.

• 1:23:08Speaker 04

  Personality.

• 1:23:10Caleb Hammer?

  Your personality is horrendous.

• 1:23:11Speaker 04

  That's what you need to be a Realtor, Caleb.

• 1:23:13Caleb Hammer?

  But you have to pay for sex.

• 1:23:14Speaker 04

  I don't need to do that.

• 1:23:15Caleb Hammer?

  Even I'm fat and I have, you know, the, my sex is like, I've never struggled with it.

• 1:23:21Speaker 04

  Let me, let me guess their name, right Angela or left C?

• 1:23:24Caleb Hammer?

  Huh? Oh.

• 1:23:26Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:23:27Caleb Hammer?

  That's, that's fine.

• 1:23:27Speaker 04

  Is that their names?

• 1:23:28Caleb Hammer?

  Very silly.

• 1:23:29Speaker 04

  Just curious, curious.

• 1:23:29Caleb Hammer?

  Very silly guy.

• 1:23:30Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:23:31Caleb Hammer?

  No, see, that's curious. Okay.

• 1:23:36Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know, man. How many people find apartments like?

• 1:23:39Speaker 04

  I could do that, man.

• 1:23:40Caleb Hammer?

  I know some people use it. It's just, it's, I don't think it's as big of a thing in Austin. I like, good luck.

• 1:23:45Speaker 04

  I mean, I could try.

• 1:23:46Caleb Hammer?

  There's so many services out there that are just online. You can browse and now they have the self touring for apartment buildings.

• 1:23:52Speaker 04

  Self touring?

• 1:23:53Caleb Hammer?

  You haven't even seen this? Look, this is the industry you're trying to get into and you're not even aware? A lot of apartment buildings around here, you scan a QR code in front and then it unlocks a unit that you're able to go into and just view what the apartment looks like and see all their amenities.

• 1:24:05Speaker 04

  Yeah, well.

• 1:24:06Caleb Hammer?

  They don't need you anymore. You're outdated. You're a dying breed.

• 1:24:10Speaker 04

  Damn. Didn't like to hear it that way, Caleb.

• 1:24:12Caleb Hammer?

  Well, cause it's true.

• 1:24:13Speaker 04

  I'll tell you what, Caleb, in sales, we learned not to quit. We learned to persuade and ask questions.

• 1:24:17Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but you also learn to game the system and your system's dying. You need to go to a different system where you can actually make money.

• 1:24:23Speaker 04

  This feels like that moment when that last Top Gun movie came out and Sergeant said, you're a dying breed, Tom Cruise, you're a dying breed. And he looked at him and like.

• 1:24:32Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, yeah, you love Tom Cruise. We, we know, we've learned.

• 1:24:35Speaker 04

  The Scientologist.

• 1:24:36Caleb Hammer?

  I, that's the reference I was making. And then I have a note that you owe your mom and dad $2,000 for a car loan, Mazda 2 green.

• 1:24:44Speaker 04

  Yeah. That's the best car on the planet. That was my dream car when I was 12, dude. I'm serious. That thing is a manual.

• 1:24:52Caleb Hammer?

  You're 25 now.

• 1:24:53Speaker 04

  Green's my favorite color. I mean, look at that. Look at that. Look how nice. What kind of car you have, Caleb?

• 1:24:58Caleb Hammer?

  Tesla.

• 1:24:58Speaker 04

  Tesla? What kind of Tesla?

• 1:25:00Caleb Hammer?

  Model X.

• 1:25:01Speaker 04

  Model X. I don't even know what a Model X is.

• 1:25:04Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, it's the premium SUV.

• 1:25:05Speaker 04

  Oh, the SUV. Oh, I see. So you're like, what are you, what are you, what are you doing in that thing? I mean.

• 1:25:10Caleb Hammer?

  Drive.

• 1:25:11Speaker 04

  You drive? Where to?

• 1:25:14Caleb Hammer?

  Work, restaurants. I went to San Antonio this weekend.

• 1:25:17Speaker 04

  Oh, you San Antonio. Okay. Well, I'll tell you what, Caleb. I mean, I know you got a lot of sightseeing to do with these houses you want to build or whatever, but I'll tell you what. If someone was doing the driving for you, like me, I could find you the best place to live.

• 1:25:30Caleb Hammer?

  I would not trust you behind a zero to sixty in three second car.

• 1:25:35Speaker 04

  They didn't either, but.

• 1:25:37Caleb Hammer?

  Who? Who's they?

• 1:25:38Speaker 04

  Oh, that's, that's redacted information.

• 1:25:41Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, right. When you worked for Tesla.

• 1:25:42Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:25:44Caleb Hammer?

  You don't know what a Model X is and you worked for Tesla? They have five models.

• 1:25:48Speaker 04

  I only know the model, and that model was me.

• 1:25:55Caleb Hammer?

  You are such a joke. You are such a embarrassment. You owe two thousand to your parents. It's for a car. What's your minimum monthly to them?

• 1:26:04Speaker 04

  I haven't paid them yet.

• 1:26:06Caleb Hammer?

  Wait, when did you get this?

• 1:26:07Speaker 04

  Um, I think it was like a couple of months ago or four months ago now, I think. I think it was four months, five months ago. Yeah.

• 1:26:14Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Who do you talk to the most?

• 1:26:16Speaker 04

  My, my mom.

• 1:26:17Caleb Hammer?

  Give her a call. Ask, ask her how she feels that you haven't made any payments yet.

• 1:26:21Speaker 04

  I'm not sure if she's available.

• 1:26:23Caleb Hammer?

  Give a call. Call them both. Yeah, I'm making you confront some shit. For what it's worth, it's worth about three thousand dollars. So you do have a thousand hour equity position in it.

• 1:26:36Speaker 04

  Let me see if I can reach out to her.

• 1:26:38Caleb Hammer?

  Call her. Call her.

• 1:26:41Speaker 04

  Okay. Let me call her.

• 1:26:49Speaker 06

  Hello?

• 1:26:50Speaker 04

  Hey, Mom. Um, so remember I was telling you I was on that podcast? I just want to ask you about something separate from all the other stuff happening. Um, they want me to ask you, how do you feel about me not making the monthly payments yet with the car that I have that I borrowed money for you and Dad from? Only that. I'm only, we're only asking about that.

• 1:27:15Speaker 04

  Oh, she hung up.

• 1:27:17Caleb Hammer?

  I'd hang up too.

• 1:27:18Speaker 04

  Oh, man.

• 1:27:19Caleb Hammer?

  Ask your dad. Call your dad.

• 1:27:20Speaker 04

  I don't know.

• 1:27:22Caleb Hammer?

  Call your dad. You don't, don't give him the whole winded thing. Just ask him how they feel that you haven't made a payment.

• 1:27:26Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:27:28Caleb Hammer?

  Doubt that's the first time she's hung up on you. The other dude hung up on you too.

• 1:27:33Speaker 04

  No, my dad's working right now. I don't think he can.

• 1:27:35Caleb Hammer?

  What does he do?

• 1:27:36Speaker 04

  He's a software developer.

• 1:27:38Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, call him.

• 1:27:40Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, they don't do anything anyway.

• 1:27:43Speaker 04

  Hey, mom, can you see my text?

• 1:27:46Speaker 07

  No.

• 1:27:47Speaker 04

  Okay, um, so I'm on a podcast right now, okay? Um.

• 1:27:53Speaker 07

  Okay.

• 1:27:54Speaker 04

  Okay, so, um, I have to ask you, what do you, what are your thoughts about me not making the monthly payment on the car yet?

• 1:28:03Speaker 07

  You're making a what?

• 1:28:04Speaker 04

  The, the, the payment, um, I'm supposed to pay you guys with the Mazda I got? What are your thoughts on that?

• 1:28:13Speaker 07

  Uh, I'm, I don't even know. I mean, it's, um, I don't know what you do with that. I mean, I don't even know.

• 1:28:21Speaker 04

  Oh, so I just gotta deal with dad? Okay, sounds good. All right, I'll talk to you later.

• 1:28:26Caleb Hammer?

  Call Papa!

• 1:28:27Speaker 04

  I'm not gonna call Papa, dude.

• 1:28:28Caleb Hammer?

  Call him.

• 1:28:29Speaker 04

  Big bear's too much for a little bear.

• 1:28:31Caleb Hammer?

  Call him. I'm telling you to call him.

• 1:28:40Caleb Hammer?

  Call him!

• 1:28:40Speaker 04

  I'm telling you, we could call him, dude. He's, he's actually working right now.

• 1:28:43Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, if he doesn't pick up, he doesn't pick up, but call him.

• 1:28:45Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:28:46Caleb Hammer?

  For fuck's sake, man.

• 1:28:51Caleb Hammer?

  You owe them 2,000 and you're not paying them. What's the agreed upon minimum monthly payment?

• 1:28:55Speaker 04

  I don't think there's even been a agreed.

• 1:28:57Caleb Hammer?

  Call him!

• 1:29:04Caleb Hammer?

  Speaker to hear.

• 1:29:08Caleb Hammer?

  Don't open with a long [__] spiel, just ask the question.

• 1:29:11Speaker 04

  Hey, hey dad, hey dad, what's up dad? Um, I was curious, what do you think about that monthly payment I sold you guys on the Mazda 2?

• 1:29:21Speaker 04

  Well, you know what, pal?

• 1:29:28Speaker 04

  I don't know, I don't know what to make of it, man. I don't know what to make of it. Am I in trouble with you guys, you and mom?

• 1:29:35Speaker 04

  We definitely have to talk later about it. Okay, but I'm still your favorite, I'm still your guys' favorite son though, right? Of course. Oh, sweet. Yeah, thanks.

• 1:29:47Caleb Hammer?

  Give me this. Give me this. Open it. Open it now. Open it. Open it.

• 1:29:53Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:29:54Caleb Hammer?

  Open your phone.

• 1:29:55Speaker 04

  There it is.

• 1:30:03Caleb Hammer?

  He didn't call his dad. He called someone named Tony.

• 1:30:05Speaker 04

  Main man Tony.

• 1:30:08Caleb Hammer?

  I knew it. You are such a little, you are such a fucking joke of a human.

• 1:30:16Speaker 04

  You didn't believe me? That was my dad, man.

• 1:30:19Caleb Hammer?

  This is your dad.

• 1:30:20Speaker 04

  Oh my god.

• 1:30:23Caleb Hammer?

  If he doesn't pick up, it's okay.

• 1:30:25Speaker 06

  Hello?

• 1:30:27Speaker 04

  Uh, dad, what are your thoughts about me not making the monthly payment on the, on the car yet?

• 1:30:34Speaker 06

  Not making?

• 1:30:35Speaker 04

  Not making the monthly payments on the car. I'm on a podcast right now.

• 1:30:39Speaker 06

  Why?

• 1:30:39Speaker 04

  Because I wanna, I wanna find out.

• 1:30:42Caleb Hammer?

  Just ask him.

• 1:30:42Speaker 04

  What do you think about me not making the monthly payments on the car yet?

• 1:30:45Speaker 06

  You don't know? Tell me more. It doesn't mean anything. I guess, I don't, I don't understand the question.

• 1:30:52Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:30:52Speaker 06

  So, should I make my monthly payments?

• 1:30:54Caleb Hammer?

  The fact that you are not paying.

• 1:30:56Speaker 06

  Payments? Have you never made a monthly payment?

• 1:30:58Speaker 04

  Yeah, the fact, the fact I haven't made monthly payments yet.

• 1:31:03Speaker 06

  Well, what do you think I would think?

• 1:31:05Speaker 04

  Probably not good, honestly.

• 1:31:07Caleb Hammer?

  Ask him how much he wants a month.

• 1:31:08Speaker 06

  Look at there, you didn't even need to call me for that.

• 1:31:10Speaker 04

  How much is it per month?

• 1:31:14Speaker 06

  I don't know. How much is it per month? Why are you asking me these questions?

• 1:31:18Speaker 04

  Um, I'll talk to you, dad. I'll just text the mom about it.

• 1:31:22Speaker 04

  It's a podcast. I'll talk to you later, okay?

• 1:31:27Caleb Hammer?

  You're indeed and you deserve it. You deserve that confrontation.

• 1:31:30Speaker 04

  You made me do that.

• 1:31:30Caleb Hammer?

  Exactly, and you deserve it honestly, because you're not willing to deal with your ever, your ever. You're not able to fucking deal with a single fucking thing. You're an immature little brat. You are a joke in this world.

• 1:31:43Speaker 02

  This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required compatibility and availability varies 18 plus.

• 1:32:08Caleb Hammer?

  World, okay? And you call someone else to try to get out of it. Fuck you. You're, you're, you're a joke.

• 1:32:14Speaker 04

  You wish I was a joke, Caleb, but when I come-

• 1:32:17Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the fuck up. I'm, we're gonna send this to your parents.

• 1:32:20Speaker 04

  No, you don't. Don't send it to them.

• 1:32:21Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, we're gonna send this to your parents and they're gonna see that you pay for sex.

• 1:32:23Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 1:32:24Caleb Hammer?

  You deserve it. Normally, I'm not like, expose the guests and this kind of stuff. You deserve it.

• 1:32:29Speaker 04

  You, obviously, I, I mean, I should expose you too, Caleb, you know why?

• 1:32:32Caleb Hammer?

  What can you expose me for? Go ahead.

• 1:32:33Speaker 04

  And when you walked, when I walked in the building, I, I saw you. You were red-eyed, you were like, all over the place. And I was like, Caleb, I'm, is this Hammer Studios? And he's like, yeah, it's Hammer Studios.

• 1:32:43Caleb Hammer?

  So you have to make up stuff to expose?

• 1:32:45Speaker 04

  I mean, I was surprised as you were. I was like, alright, let me just go and do my thing here tonight.

• 1:32:48Caleb Hammer?

  I didn't see you until you went to pee chlamydia all over our bathroom walls while I was trying to get myself a coffee.

• 1:32:54Speaker 04

  Only, only you would know what chlamydia would look like. I mean, are you a doctor or something? I mean, I-

• 1:32:58Caleb Hammer?

  So, we're doing the rubber glue situation again.

• 1:33:00Speaker 04

  What's rubber glue? Is this arts and crafts?

• 1:33:02Caleb Hammer?

  I'm rubber, you're glue. Everything I, you say, bounces off me and sticks to you.

• 1:33:05Speaker 04

  Oh my god.

• 1:33:06Caleb Hammer?

  That's all you do, buddy. That's the only-

• 1:33:08Speaker 04

  You wish.

• 1:33:08Caleb Hammer?

  I wish?

• 1:33:09Speaker 04

  You wish, yeah, just like-

• 1:33:10Caleb Hammer?

  Again, you're doing it again. That's all, that's your only comeback.

• 1:33:13Speaker 04

  Yeah, you wish, you wish.

• 1:33:14Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you have never left the playground.

• 1:33:17Speaker 04

  I haven't, because I'm always having fun, Caleb, unlike you, because you don't exchange your time for money. You need people to take some of the stuff off your plate.

• 1:33:26Caleb Hammer?

  I'm hiring people right now. We're hiring like a dozen people. You don't, you know nothing about our business.

• 1:33:32Speaker 04

  I know a lot, because I'm gonna get into it, I'm gonna see how well-

• 1:33:35Caleb Hammer?

  You're not gonna ever be allowed near this building. If we see you entering the complex, our security guard will pull out his gun.

• 1:33:43Speaker 04

  What kind of gun does he have?

• 1:33:45Caleb Hammer?

  It's a pistol of some kind.

• 1:33:46Speaker 04

  What kind of pistol?

• 1:33:47Caleb Hammer?

  I set up some kind, because I do not know.

• 1:33:49Speaker 04

  Really?

• 1:33:49Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 1:33:50Speaker 04

  Okay, well, I'll tell you what.

• 1:33:51Caleb Hammer?

  It's concealed.

• 1:33:52Speaker 04

  Do you know how to how to disarm someone with a pistol? It's quite easy, in fact.

• 1:33:57Caleb Hammer?

  He's trained, and I don't think you're gonna be even close. You won't even be close to him by the time you know a bullet has left his barrel.

• 1:34:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, I'm fast as.

• 1:34:05Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you own medical bills.

• 1:34:07Speaker 04

  Yeah, I do.

• 1:34:10Speaker 04

  There's actually some some good reason for those medical bills. There's a.

• 1:34:15Caleb Hammer?

  What brain injury was it?

• 1:34:18Speaker 04

  It was the the the brain injury. I got like the Mozart brain. I got like a creative creative mind.

• 1:34:23Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 1:34:24Speaker 04

  I feel like your mind like is like stalled. I feel like your brain is like really like like put together, but you're like kind of like a dimwit.

• 1:34:31Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, you are just the most moronic mother. Yeah, all you do is just, when you don't, when you get a little bit of pushback, you just do the immature little insult things. And I love a good immature insult, but you do it so poorly.

• 1:34:43Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:34:44Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 1:34:45Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:34:46Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 1:34:47Speaker 04

  Okay, say it one more time.

• 1:34:50Caleb Hammer?

  What's the medical bill for, you?

• 1:34:52Speaker 04

  Ah, well, um, I had ADHD, but I cured myself. I cured this myself.

• 1:34:58Caleb Hammer?

  Moving on.

• 1:35:01Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the fuck up.

• 1:35:05Speaker 04

  Ever heard of magic mushrooms?

• 1:35:06Caleb Hammer?

  You ever heard of what's in your checking account right now?

• 1:35:08Speaker 04

  Oh, it's, let me check.

• 1:35:11Speaker 04

  Three hundred twenty nine dollars.

• 1:35:13Caleb Hammer?

  It's a new savings.

• 1:35:15Speaker 04

  Thirty two dollars.

• 1:35:17Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so it's all gone down from here. We're getting Starbucks Chipotle, even though we're fired. Booze and liquor. Um, liquor and fucking smoke, whatever. We do that like five times. McDonald's. Booze, booze, booze, McDonald's, booze.

• 1:35:34Caleb Hammer?

  Ben went out money, probably torches, smoke shop, McDonald's, liquor. Liquor, liquor, liquor, DoorDash, Ben went out money, liquor. Seventy seven degrees, liquor and smokes and liquor and smokes and liquor smokes, liquor smokes, liquor smokes, liquor smokes. Learning out money, lime payoff.

• 1:35:56Speaker 04

  Lime payoff, what's that?

• 1:35:57Caleb Hammer?

  I don't fucking know.

• 1:35:58Speaker 04

  I love limes.

• 1:35:59Caleb Hammer?

  Galaxy, liquor booze, liquor booze, liquor booze, smoke shop, lime ride. Tacos, tacos, Ricardo, champs, and liquor, smoke, liquor, smoke. Stop!

• 1:36:15Caleb Hammer?

  Stop! You're annoying! Liquor, smokes, Domino's, DoorDash, DoorDash.

• 1:36:28Caleb Hammer?

  So you pulled for the 400K. Again, I need to hear about that, cuz like, what did you even use the money for?

• 1:36:35Speaker 04

  I used the money to pay off all the credit card debt I had and then-

• 1:36:38Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, and then it's all back up, great, you're-

• 1:36:40Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:36:42Speaker 04

  I- I- It's kinda like a Pistons. You know how Pistons work? If you put pressure on one, the other four raise. You know how they design cars like that or whatever? I think it's the same thing that happens. Like, you put pressure on one thing and the rest of it just raises. So like, I think I focus too much on my finances sometimes where it just like stresses me out.

• 1:37:00Caleb Hammer?

  And being 100% genuine right now-

• 1:37:02Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:37:02Caleb Hammer?

  I wanna see exactly what this is. The last, uh, escort-

• 1:37:07Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:37:07Caleb Hammer?

  Is a term we agreed on-

• 1:37:08Speaker 04

  Uh huh.

• 1:37:08Caleb Hammer?

  That you slept with.

• 1:37:09Speaker 04

  Uh huh.

• 1:37:10Caleb Hammer?

  Show me her picture. 100% serious and don't fuck around. I want it to be the real picture. Your phone's on the table next to your kid's drink.

• 1:37:18Speaker 04

  Sweet. Who doesn't like Kool-Aid?

• 1:37:21Caleb Hammer?

  It's Capri Sun. It's not Kool-Aid.

• 1:37:27Speaker 04

  Let me look.

• 1:37:28Caleb Hammer?

  I want this to be real. You better not- uh, all I know- you've only deflected, lied, even about the people you're calling, like-

• 1:37:38Speaker 04

  I'm looking right now.

• 1:37:39Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. How do you find them? Uh, where are you- where are you looking to get the picture?

• 1:37:43Speaker 04

  No, they're just my contacts.

• 1:37:44Caleb Hammer?

  Where is- okay, so it's in your contact?

• 1:37:46Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:37:47Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so you pulled her off this-

• 1:37:48Speaker 04

  I'll show you.

• 1:37:49Caleb Hammer?

  Can you tell me a genuine answer?

• 1:37:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:37:51Caleb Hammer?

  Genuine, where do you find these escorts?

• 1:37:54Speaker 04

  I don't find them.

• 1:37:54Caleb Hammer?

  Come on. To give me- no, tell me the real answer.

• 1:37:58Speaker 04

  Okay, okay. So, at my apartment complex, there's like a, a huge like, uh, been like busts apparently of like all these like are over there. And so when I found out about it, like, they all go by the pool. And so when I go by the pool, like, it's just a casual conversation because they know what you're looking for. And so-

• 1:38:17Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, show me. Show me the picture.

• 1:38:19Speaker 04

  I'll show you. Give me a second.

• 1:38:21Caleb Hammer?

  Looks like in 2025. I'm not gonna get a budget out of you because you're a joke, but at least this was an entertaining conversation for the audience. We did, I, I, I made it through for you, but I've reached the end. We're gonna look at a pro- And then in the post-show here in a second, I'm gonna bring in my number two in command who does first round interviews. I do second round interviews and last round. Uh, we're gonna bring in, we're gonna conduct a actual formal job interview with him. And then we're gonna bring in some extra tea that the producers have as always. So make sure you join that. Now let's take a look at this.

• 1:38:51Speaker 04

  I'm trying to look.

• 1:38:52Caleb Hammer?

  Do you remember her name?

• 1:38:54Speaker 04

  Uh, no, you just stuck it in and gave her a money. Yeah, or something, wasn't her, yeah? I'm searching. Second.

• 1:39:01Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you know, you can type in that name and find out, right?

• 1:39:04Speaker 04

  Oh, she, I would find her. Okay. Where is she? Right.

• 1:39:14Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 1:39:16Speaker 04

  She's a MILF.

• 1:39:17Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, she looks like a pro.

• 1:39:22Caleb Hammer?

  And we're not gonna put the picture on the screen because I don't want people to reverse image search and find her, but she's caked and fucking, okay? Tell me, how much did it cost?

• 1:39:31Speaker 04

  Actually, um-

• 1:39:32Caleb Hammer?

  Tell me, how much did it cost? No more around answers. Give me the real answer.

• 1:39:37Speaker 04

  Three hundred bucks.

• 1:39:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. What did you do for three hundred dollars?

• 1:39:41Speaker 04

  Um, I got a make out with her and then she did a little, a little something to my, my, my special spot.

• 1:39:48Caleb Hammer?

  So she blew you?

• 1:39:49Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:39:49Caleb Hammer?

  You didn't have sex?

• 1:39:50Speaker 04

  No.

• 1:39:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:39:53Caleb Hammer?

  She's the CEO of a company. Let's, it just links to her own Instagram. Okay, let's see what her company is. Uh, salon, let the salon come to you. Yeah, I'm sure that's what she does when the salon gets to her.

• 1:40:07Speaker 04

  Must be a cover.

• 1:40:09Caleb Hammer?

  Yep. Oh, no.

• 1:40:14Caleb Hammer?

  Um.

• 1:40:17Caleb Hammer?

  You know it's a cover because she sent you the link.

• 1:40:22Caleb Hammer?

  And you said, sweet. A sunglasses emoji. Me too. Uh, then you guys talked about someone. You're going to love your haircut.

• 1:40:35Speaker 04

  I've heard that before.

• 1:40:36Caleb Hammer?

  Can't wait, you say.

• 1:40:40Caleb Hammer?

  Concierge services, book, uh, messages, makeup, hair, caterings, chef services, all the things. For condos, high rises, hotels, man, the air entities and Airbnb.

• 1:40:55Caleb Hammer?

  You may be free tomorrow for the haircut. What time tomorrow? Can you do 2:15? Hey.

• 1:41:02Caleb Hammer?

  Hey, text my work for a haircut. Yes, this is how normal people communicate. Okay. Hey, I left a message. Oh gosh, I saw it.

• 1:41:14Caleb Hammer?

  I need a haircut and he, and he knows who can do it best, winky face.

• 1:41:21Caleb Hammer?

  You wait, did you guys ever? Because you've given her a lot of messages she hasn't responded to.

• 1:41:27Speaker 04

  No, that's like, um, cause like we were talking, cause she is on my car, um, my apartment complex. So like we went by the pool and then.

• 1:41:35Caleb Hammer?

  You deleted her text messages.

• 1:41:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:41:40Speaker 04

  No, that's what I was looking for, but I didn't see it.

• 1:41:43Caleb Hammer?

  How often do you do it?

• 1:41:45Speaker 04

  How often? Like, I don't really.

• 1:41:48Caleb Hammer?

  Come on, man. How often do you do it?

• 1:41:50Speaker 04

  How often do you do it? Like I do like.

• 1:41:52Caleb Hammer?

  I don't.

• 1:41:53Speaker 04

  You don't, is it because you can't get any?

• 1:41:56Caleb Hammer?

  No, that's what people that get processed do it for, cause they can't get any. Well, again, I am seeing someone I do not need that. And even before I've always at least luckily been able to, you know, get people that I'm attracted to.

• 1:42:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, me too. I mean, but sometimes.

• 1:42:11Caleb Hammer?

  But how often do you do the process?

• 1:42:13Speaker 04

  Some odd, maybe once a month.

• 1:42:14Caleb Hammer?

  That's crazy, buddy. You know that's crazy. Why do you do it?

• 1:42:17Speaker 04

  I don't know.

• 1:42:17Caleb Hammer?

  No, come on. Why do you do it?

• 1:42:19Speaker 04

  Hmm. Probably for urges, you know? I don't really care. I mean, it's, it's just one thing. I mean.

• 1:42:28Speaker 04

  What do you think about it? I mean, it's not even that bad.

• 1:42:30Caleb Hammer?

  I think about it, that it's illegal and I think about it. I would be okay if I know for a fact that they are not in a situation where they're being controlled for someone, where they're in fear for their life, where they're not being trafficked. I would only ever be okay with it in society. If it was like regulated in a way where they're safe and they're good. And then I don't care what consensual adults do. But the fact that there's a lot of people in those situations are usually in a sketchy situation. Listen. You're disgusting, you're a joke of a human. We're gonna go to the post show. We're gonna conduct a formal job interview and talk about some extra tea that the producers have that I do not know. So make sure you guys join that. Hammerly is the version with thousands of hours of extra content and a lot of other shows that I produce behind that. And make sure you download the budget nap if you don't want to turn out like him. Actually, I don't think it's gonna save this kind of case.

• 1:43:15Caleb Hammer?

  But remember, if you sign up for the annual version, I'll send you the cookbook, signed and mailed directly to your door. Join us in the post show. He legitimately, 100%, 100% wants a job here. This is real.

• 1:43:26Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:43:27Caleb Hammer?

  I will let this be a real job interview. We can do it full real.

• 1:43:30Speaker 04

  Sounds good.

• 1:43:31Caleb Hammer?

  Full real. Robert usually does the first round. I usually do the last round. We'll do a co little interview thing here.

• 1:43:36Speaker 06

  All right, man. Let's start with your name.

• 1:43:38Caleb Hammer?

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• 1:43:49Speaker 08

  What's the secret to being a great host this season? Keeping things deliciously simple, like mixing Simply Cranberry into a festive drink as guests arrive, or serving up a warm mug of Simply Apple on a chilly night. That means less time behind the scenes and more time in the moment with everyone. Crafted with real fruit, Simply juices and fruit drinks make any holiday drink effortless, inviting, and completely delicious. Simply. Say yes to simple.