Have You Considered This? | 60 Stoic Lessons In 1 Minute Or Less

We all have reasons we don’t like something. We think a certain comedian isn’t funny or is a hack. We think a certain author is too basic or overhyped. We think that Oscar-winning movie is total garbage. We know what’s stupid and lame, what’s low brow or trash, what’s fake and what’s real, authentic and commercial. It’s interesting how certain we are with these opinions about particular people or products. Far less often do we stop and think, “Oh maybe I’m just not the audience for that.”---And today Ryan talks about some of the surest ways to improve yourself and your life by listing 60 of the most valuable lessons that you can learn from the Stoics.✉️ Sign up for the Daily Stoic email: https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail🏛 Check out the Daily Stoic Store for Stoic inspired products, signed books, and more.📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. 📢 Share | ⚙️ Manage Subscription

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Ryan Holiday?

  Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we read a passage of ancient wisdom designed to help you in your everyday life. On Tuesdays, we take a closer look at these Stoic ideas, how we can apply them in our actual lives. Thanks for listening, and I hope you enjoy.

• 0:26Ryan Holiday?

  Have you considered this? We all have reasons we don't like something. We think a certain comedian isn't funny or is a hack. We think a certain author is too basic or overhyped. We think that Oscar-winning movie is total garbage. We know what's stupid and lame, what's lowbrow or trash, what's fake and what's real, authentic or commercial.

• 0:46Ryan Holiday?

  It's interesting how certain we are with these opinions about particular people or products. Far less often do we stop and think, "Oh, maybe I'm just not the audience for that." Stoicism itself is often the victim of this by academics. "The philosophy is too simple, too self-helpy, too repetitive," they say. Daily Stoic is itself accused of that very thing by fans of Stoicism. "I don't need a coin to remind me of my mortality. Why not just read the original text instead of some modern book?" But again, what if, maybe, just maybe, it's not for you? Maybe it's for someone else. Maybe someone who is struggling. Maybe someone who just wants to relax at the beginning and the end of the day. Someone who needed a reminder. Someone with a very different experience

• 1:30Ryan Holiday?

  or preference than you. Someone with different needs than you at this very moment. The wiser and smarter we get should not correspond with an increase in snootiness or elitism. On the contrary, we should become more understanding, more accepting. We've talked many times about the idea of being strict with yourself and tolerant of others. Nowhere should that idea be more applied than when it comes to taste. Push yourself. Have strong or exacting opinions for what you consume, for what you like, sure. But why on earth would you feel the need to have an opinion on what other people like? Why would you want to denigrate what they are getting something out of? Why would you want to step on their joy? Focus on your journey.

• 2:15Ryan Holiday?

  Leave everyone else to their own. Unless, of course, you have a helpful suggestion or a recommendation, just as others have given you, in which case, be a good fan and provide it.

• 2:33Ryan Holiday?

  There's an amazing story about Kurt Vonnegut and Joseph Heller, who wrote Catch 22 and Slaughterhouse-Five. They're at the party of this billionaire. And Vonnegut is teasing Heller, and he says, "This billionaire, whose house we're at, he made more money this week than your book will make in its entire life." Heller says, "But I have something that he doesn't have." Vonnegut says, "What's that?" And Heller says, "I have some idea of what enough is." He says, "I have enough." This idea of enough is so powerful. Seneca, who quotes Epicureus, says, "If you don't regard what you have as enough, you will never be happy, even if you rule the entire world." Right? Enough is never enough, the Epicureans and the Stoics say, for the person who enough is too little. And if you can get to a place of enough, what I have is good, everything else is extra,

• 3:17Ryan Holiday?

  then everything you get is a bonus, and the rest of your life is amazing. But if you tell yourself you'll only be happy if, if I'll feel better when, you'll never get there. The finish line will move, I promise you. Enough is enough. Seven Stoic don'ts, things you must stop doing right now, according to the Stoics. "Don't be overheard complaining, not even to yourself," as Marcus Aurelius says. "Don't talk more than you listen. Two ears, one mouth," that's Zeno. "Don't tie your identity to things you own, because those things are fragile, because those things can be taken from you at any moment." "Don't compare yourself to others. Comparison is the thief of joy." "Don't suffer imagined troubles," as Seneca says. "It'll either happen, or it won't. Don't suffer before you need to." "Don't judge others. Strict with others, tolerant with yourself."

• 4:02Ryan Holiday?

  That's Marcus Aurelius. Remember, you mess up too, so don't judge other people. And finally, don't overindulge in food or drink. This is the idea of temperance. It's about balance. It's about the right amount. So those are seven Stoic don'ts to stop doing right now. Three lessons from Marcus Aurelius. Number one, it's not what happens, it's how we respond to what happens. He says, "The impediment to action allows us an opportunity to move forward, to try a different action." Number two, he says, "Ask yourself at every moment, is this essential? Do I really need to do this?" And he says, "When you do less, you get the double benefit of doing less better." The third thing from Marcus Aurelius, this would be the exercise of momentum. Memento Mori. He said, "You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think."

• 4:45Ryan Holiday?

  He says, "Let every action, every decision, every thought be that of a dying person." When you think about life that way, it gives you urgency, it gives you clarity, and it lets you see what actually matters. Nine short rules for a better life. Number one, wake up early. Attack the morning. Two, focus on effort, not results. You control the effort, you control what you put in. What comes out the other side, that's not up to you. Read every day. You should always be reading. Reading is the greatest invention there ever was. Read every day. You have to read. As General Mattis says, "If you don't read, you are functionally illiterate." Strict with yourself, tolerant with others. Again, you control what you do. You control the standards you hold yourself to, but it's called self-discipline for a reason.

• 5:28Ryan Holiday?

  You can't expect other people to live the same way you do. Seek out challenges. Be comfortable being uncomfortable. Push yourself. That's how you get better. By lifting heavy things is how you get stronger. Challenging yourself is how you get better. Stay a student. Always stay a student. Focus on what there is left to learn, not what you've already discovered. That's how scientists, that's how geniuses, that's how creators get better, by focusing on what there is left to learn. Cut toxic people out of your life. Life is too short. Have good boundaries. If they're not making your life better, bye. Think about death. Memento Mori. We were all born with a fatal diagnosis. To take life for granted is an incredible waste, and that's what Seneca says. It's not that life is short, it's that we waste a lot of it.

• 6:13Ryan Holiday?

  And finally, and I'm repeating this one because it's so important, focus on what you control, right? You control what you do, you control what you say, you control what you think, control what you put in. Everything else, not up to you, not worth your focus. People suck. It's harsh, but it's true. I mean, Marcus Aurelius opens Meditations with music on how much people suck. How they lie and cheat and steal and are motivated by silly, ridiculous things. It's true, people suck. But he also says in Meditations, "Look, the only thing that's not worthless in this life is to do what's right, is to be good." And then he says, "To be patient with..." Those who aren't, right? That's what we're doing. People do suck. People are problematic. People do present countless obstacles to us.

• 6:57Ryan Holiday?

  And yet, that is an opportunity to practice Stoicism, to practice self-discipline, to practice fairness, even in the face of unfairness. So, a Stoic takes reality as it is unflinchingly, and it doesn't change what they believe their obligation is in this world. If you do anything that matters, people will have really strong opinions about you. That's just like a fact of life. If you don't like that, don't do anything. And we can imagine that people had strong opinions about Marcus Aurelius and Seneca and Epictetus. Anyone that's ever put themselves out there in the realm of ideas or in the arena of life, people have criticized. You have to be able to tune that out. Marcus Aurelius says, "We love ourselves more than other people, yet for some reason we care about their opinions more than their own." I love, I'll get criticized for my books, a person be like, "Oh, he did X, Y, and Z"

• 7:40Ryan Holiday?

  as a criticism, but it's like, "That's exactly what I was trying to do." And you realize, oh, not only is this person's opinion like not worth listening to, if you heard it properly, you'd see that they were actually complimenting you. So, you have to be able to tune out what other people say and do. You have to focus on what you do, that's what the Stoics say, to develop kind of an inner scorecard where you understand what you're trying to do, how you judge or measure your success, and it can't have anything to do with critics, with doubters, with haters, with your parents, with your spouse. It has to be based on your own understanding of what you're trying to do, of who you're trying to be as a person. That's what matters, and that's what you measure yourself by. The Stoics are masters of one-liners, and I want to give you five of the best all-time Stoic one-liners.

• 8:24Ryan Holiday?

  Number one, from Epictetus, "If you want to be beautiful, make beautiful choices." Number two, from Seneca, "We suffer more in imagination than reality." Number three, from Marcus Aurelius, "We love ourselves more than other people, but for some reason we care about their opinions more than our own." Four, from Marcus Aurelius, "You always have the right to have no opinion about this. You can always think nothing about this." And finally, Zeno, "You have two ears, but only one mouth for a reason." You have to stop putting stuff off, right? You just have to stop putting- Marcus Aurelius says, "You could be good today, but instead you choose tomorrow." Epictetus asks, "How much longer are you gonna wait to demand the best from yourself?"

• 9:08Ryan Holiday?

  Stop putting stuff off. There's this great Latin expression, it just translates to, "Do it if you're gonna do it." It's like the Nike slogan, "Just do it. Don't put it off. If it matters, if it's worth doing, do it now." Because the truth is, now you have for certain. You don't know that you have tomorrow. It's arrogant to think that you can get to this next year. It's arrogant to think you'll do that when you retire. Now is now. Do it now. Don't put it off. Do it now. Some things you should stop doing, according to the Stoics. Stop complaining. Stop focusing on what you don't control. Stop acting like you're gonna live forever. Stop fearing the future. Stop regretting the past, because you don't control either. Stop chasing fame. What good is posthumous fame? Marcus Aurelius says you'll be dead. Stop being selfish. Work for the common good. And what should you start doing?

• 9:52Ryan Holiday?

  You should start being your best self, following these four Stoic virtues: courage, justice, temperance, wisdom. You get up early. You just, you have to get up early, even though you don't want to. Marcus Aurelius says, "What were you made to stay under the covers and be warm?" No, you were put on this planet to do something. Dante says, "Under the blankets is no way to fame." You get up early and you do something. You go for a run. You write in your journal. You sit quietly and watch the sunrise. You meditate. I don't care what you do. But a Stoic gets up early, they own the morning, because owning the morning is a critical part of owning the day. These are six Stoic keys to smashing your anxiety, to getting rid of it, to not being controlled by it. Number one, this is the core exercise of Stoicism. Is this in my control?

• 10:37Ryan Holiday?

  We worry about things, we stress about things, because we're acting as if that matters, as if it makes a difference, as if it's having an impact, and of course, it doesn't. "Don't suffer imagined troubles," Seneca says. Meaning, don't borrow suffering. Don't torture yourself because of what might happen in the future. Just think about this. Zoom out. Think about all the things you've been worried in your life. How often have those things actually happened? More often than not, your worries are worse than reality. Sometimes you beat anxiety by zooming way out, looking at the 10,000-foot view. Looking at it from Plato's view, as Marcus Aurelius says. Other times, it's zooming Way in, looking at it up close, not being overwhelmed by the totality of it. But we always have the ability to shift our perspective. This is what the Stoics call the discipline of perception we have to practice it all with.

• 11:19Ryan Holiday?

  Marcus Aurelius says in Meditations today, "I escaped my anxiety." And he says, "No, wait, wait, wait. I discarded it. It's within me. It's a feeling inside you that you're bringing to the situation. It's your expectations, it's your worries, it's your demands, it's your fears, it's your hopes." Marcus Aurelius says, "Ask yourself, is this necessary? Does it actually matter? Do I need to do it? Will it make a difference? Why do I even care about this?" The best way the Stoics say to beat anxiety is think about the things that you have been through before. Marcus Aurelius says, "How will you meet the problems of tomorrow? With the same weapons that you have today, with the same way that you've gotten through adversity before." I think that's one lesson from the pandemic. Maybe you wondered before, could you have lived through the kinds of things that your ancestors lived through? Well, the answer is yes, of course.

• 12:03Ryan Holiday?

  Seneca says, "You know what you're capable of. You don't need to be anxious. You've been through crazy shit. Maybe in some ways it improved you. You made changes, you learned things. You don't have to be anxious because you're more capable than you know. And you should know how capable you are by looking at the things you have been through before. Look at your track record. You have evidence." Some things the Stoics say you should not do, that you should never do. One, don't be overheard complaining even to yourself. That's Marcus Aurelius. Two, don't put on airs about your self-improvement. That's Epictetus. He says, "Don't talk about it, be about it." Don't overindulge in eating or drinking. Moderation is key. That's Musonius Rufus. And Zeno says, "Two ears, one mouth for a reason. Don't speak more than you listen." Don't do those things and you'll have a good life.

• 12:48Ryan Holiday?

  Stoic don't. Number one, don't waste time. Seneca says that the craziest thing is that we protect our property, we protect our money, but we waste our time, even though it's a truly non-renewable resource. Number two, forget about revenge. You're not going to get even with someone. They are punishing themselves. Marcus Aurelius says, "The best revenge is to not be like that." Don't be caught off guard. Seneca says, "The only inexcusable thing for a leader to say is, 'I did not think that could happen.'" The art of premeditation. Tashio Malorum for the Stoics was negative visualization, preparing in advance for what could happen and having a plan for it. Final one is a reminder for Marcus Aurelius that you don't need to have an opinion about this.

• 13:31Ryan Holiday?

  He says, "You always have the power of having no opinion." It doesn't concern you, it's not something you control. If it's pointless gossip or trivia, ignore it. Just let it be, let other people be concerned with it, but let it float on by and don't get caught up in it. There's this story about George Clooney. He has this transformational moment in his career. He realizes that they want to hire someone, they have to hire someone, that they have a problem. And then he realizes that by seeing himself as the solution to that problem, his mindset shifts. The Stoics talk about the discipline of perception. How we see things is everything. Epictetus says this, he says, "It's not things that upset us, it's our judgment about things." But the other way is true also. Deciding to see this thing as an opportunity, see yourself as the solution to a problem,

• 14:15Ryan Holiday?

  as opposed to seeing yourself as this person who's begging for something, who's desperate for something. That attitude shift, that perspective shift can be everything. Why did you expect anything different from people? The Stoics say, "Of course they're gonna act like this. Look at what they believe, look at who they are." Have you studied history? Have you met a human being before? Look, if you are disappointed in people, if you are frustrated in people, that's on you. You brought that to them, you projected that on them. You set yourself up to be disappointed. Be strict with yourself, tolerant with others. That's what the Stoics say. "Don't go around expecting people to be anything other than they have always been, and you will not only be happier, but you will be kinder and more patient and more successful."

• 14:57Ryan Holiday?

  You have to remember that your anxiety is not being caused by external things. Your frustrations are not being caused by external things. No one is responsible for your emotions but yourself. I know that's easy to say, it's very hard to put in practice. I struggle with it all the time, but that's the idea. Marcus Aurelius says, "I escaped my anxiety today." He says, "No, I discarded it because it was within me." He is the cause of his own anxiety. He is what brings that to external events, not the other way around. We have to remember that always. No one can make you upset, no one can make you mad, no one can make you... Sad, no one can make you feel inferior. As Eleanor Roosevelt says, "Without your consent, we are complicit in those emotions. We choose to have them. External things are not responsible for them." Of all the quotes we've posted on Daily Stoic,

• 15:42Ryan Holiday?

  consistently, the most popular is this one from Seneca. He says, "We suffer more in imagination than in reality." Meaning anxiety, worry, doubt. We're sort of projecting out into the future all these terrible things that might happen. And this makes us miserable. It also makes us unprepared. It makes us reject the present moment. It makes us unable to do what we should be doing. So a stoic does not suffer imagined troubles. Yes, we're prepared for anything. Yes, we sometimes think about what the worst-case scenario is. That's what premeditatio malorum is. But what we don't do, Seneca says, is borrow suffering. Suffer before we need to. Suffer in anticipation of things. We look at things as they are right now. That's what we're going to deal with. One of my favorite quotes from Marcus Aurelius,

• 16:25Ryan Holiday?

  he says, "You know, you don't have to have an opinion about that." And I just think about that all the time. I don't have to have an opinion about this. I can just let it be. I can ignore it. I can realize it doesn't pertain to me. Or I can just see it as it is. I don't need to say that it's good or bad, fair or unfair. It just is. I'm going to look at it as an objective piece of information. It doesn't need me projecting my thoughts or beliefs or perceptions on it. It is. You don't have to have an opinion about this. There's this amazing story about Ulysses S. Grant. He's this promising young military officer. He serves honorably in the Mexican-American war. But then something goes wrong. He basically ends up working for his dad, selling firewood by the side of the road. And one of his old friends from West Point comes by one day

• 17:09Ryan Holiday?

  and he says, "Good God, Grant, what are you doing?" And Ulysses S. Grant just looks at him and he says, "I'm solving the problem of poverty." Meaning that Grant doesn't care that he's doing this so-called menial job or that it's a humiliating occupation. All he cares about is that he's providing for his family. He's doing a good job. He knows that it doesn't say anything about him as a person. It's crazy to think that just a few years later, Grant would be the head of an enormous army. And a few years after that, he'd be the president of the United States. To accept it without arrogance, to... Let it go with indifference. You don't let the lowly position change who you are, and you don't let the high position change who you are either. None of it goes to your head. You know none of it says anything about you as a person, and that's what really matters.

• 17:51Ryan Holiday?

  Everything you say yes to means you're saying no to something else. It took me forever to realize this. I just said yes to giving a talk in Florida. It was great. They paid me. It was a cool opportunity. But in saying yes to that, I said no to being at home that night with my kids. I said no to my writing routine. I said no to my normal exercise routine, serendipitous things they don't even know about. I said no to so many things. When you say yes to something, you're saying no to something else, right? But Marcus really says when you say no to things, you get the double benefit. Not only are you not doing the inessential things that you don't need to be doing, but in saying no, you are saying yes to the things that really matter. We know the Stoics were big on routine. Seneca says, "Life without design is erratic." So some daily practices from the Stoics that everyone can use.

• 18:36Ryan Holiday?

  Wake up early. Spend some time with a journal. Think about value you can create for other people, for the world. Concentrate like a Roman, Marcus really says, like the thing you're doing is the last thing you're doing in your life. Work for the common good. He says, "The fruit of this life is good character and acts for the common good." Schedule, keep a routine. Antoninus Pius was notorious. His day was so scheduled, his diet was so constrained. He set up a life where he didn't even have to take a lot of bathroom breaks. And then Seneca talks about putting your day up for review. At the end of the day, stop and think, what could I have done better? What can I improve? What difference did I make? How did I improve myself? And then, as we go to bed, the Stoics say, think about that this was your last day on earth. Your life is over.

• 19:20Ryan Holiday?

  And then, when you wake up the next day, you're grateful because it's all bonus time. It's all extra. You're playing with house money. And that's how the Stoics go through life, with a wonderful routine, design. And life, as Seneca says, "Without design is erratic." Three things I learned from Robert Greene. One, mastery requires a long apprenticeship, either under a great master, painful trial and error. But to be great at something, it takes a very long time. And the education phase of it is the longest period. Number two, he told Me once when I was thinking of leaving my job in American Apparel, that life can be defined by a live time or dead time. Are you learning and getting better or are you killing time? We have to always be learning and getting better. Always focus on how we can use the moment in front of us.

• 20:03Ryan Holiday?

  The third and the most important lesson is even if you want to be a good person, even if you want to be nice and friendly and generous, it doesn't change the fact that you have to understand the laws of power. You have to understand how people are acting in the world and the forces that make them do what they do. Three things I learned from Tim Ferriss. Number one, and I learned this very early from him. He said, "Look at what an hour of your time is worth and then try to pay people to do anything that's less than that amount." Right? And this is so hard because if you come from a sort of a middle-class background, you're used to doing stuff for yourself. It feels reckless to pay for people. But time is your only non-renewable resource. And so to spend it doing things that you're not the best at is a complete waste of time. The second thing, and this was really life-changing for me. He said, "Think of everything as an experiment."

• 20:46Ryan Holiday?

  So as you go through life, if you're thinking about dropping out of college, don't think about it as an irrevocable life decision. Think about it as an experiment where you take a year off. If you think about quitting your job, it's the same thing. If you think about any change in your lifestyle, move into a new city, see it as an experiment. And the third thing is, you know, Tim was not the first person to start a blog. He's not the first person to get a Twitter account. He's not the first person to be an angel investor. He was not the first person to start a podcast. You don't have to be first. You just have to do the thing really well. You have to do it better than most people and eventually quality will find its audience. So those are three things I learned from my friend, Tim Ferriss. When you meet an annoying, obnoxious, rude person, Marcus Aurelius says, "Ask yourself, is a world without rude,

• 21:29Ryan Holiday?

  obnoxious, frustrating people possible? Is it likely?" The answer is, of course not. So he says, "Okay, you met one of those people. Why is this surprising to you?" He says, "It takes the sting out of the obnoxiousness, the rudeness, the selfishness to realize you met one of a number." Right? If it's 10%, one in 10 people that you meet will be annoying. So you can't be surprised when you meet them. You come to terms with it. So I love this exercise because it just turns down the volume for me on all the frustrations. This is one of those people. It's, "I'm gonna meet them sometime." Not gonna get too bent out of shape about it. And this is true when you meet someone who steals, when you meet someone who lies, when you meet someone who cheats. Certain percentage of people are gonna do that. And we're fooling ourselves to pretend that they won't. So when you meet them, say, "This is one of those numbers. I'm not one of those numbers."

• 22:14Ryan Holiday?

  And then you move on. There's a great line, "Comparison is the thief of joy." Comes to us from Theodore Roosevelt. "When you compare yourself to others, you feel like you have less, you feel like you are less." And in Meditations, Marcus says, "Think about how silly it is that we envy people without really thinking about who they are and what their lives are like." And then he says, "Think about all the people that are envious of you. Think about how you yourself would be envious of yourself if you suddenly didn't have what you have and you were someone else." The idea for the Stoics is to do these kind of thought exercises to combat these emotional impulses or temptations we have or destructive thought patterns. Like, you don't need to be jealous of other people. First off, because other people are probably jealous of you. And you'd be jealous of yourself if your situation was different.

• 22:56Ryan Holiday?

  So the idea of just being satisfied with what you have, of accepting what you have, of letting what you have be enough, that's everything. As Epicurus says, quoted by Seneca, "Enough will never be enough for the person to whom enough is too little." The secret to life, to happiness, to relationships, according to Stoics, is one thing. It's taking a minute before you respond. The Stoics say, "We don't control what happens, we control how we respond." Viktor Frankl talks about, "Between the stimulus and the response, there's a moment." And in this moment, in this brief instance, this is when we choose who we are, what we're gonna be, what's important to us. You don't have to respond right away, you can wait. Put a second of pause in there, just wait a beat. You can be angry, you can have an angry reaction.

• 23:40Ryan Holiday?

  You can be angry, you can be provoked, you can be frustrated, you can be scared. You don't have to take an action based on that emotion. You have the ability to choose what you do in response. If you take a beat, if you take a minute, you're probably gonna respond better. Theodore Roosevelt considers inviting Booker T. Washington to the White House, the first black man ever be allowed to dine as a guest at the White House. But he hesitates because he thinks for a second about the political consequences, he thinks about the controversy, he thinks about the backlash. He thinks even about some of his own southern relatives. But then Theodore Roosevelt writes that precisely because he hesitated, he felt ashamed and he knew that he had to do it. And I think there's something about hesitation that is showing us that this is actually precisely the thing that we need to do.

• 24:25Ryan Holiday?

  When the Stoics talk about courage, when they talk about this idea that courage is calling, we should expect that sometimes we're going to hesitate. Sometimes we're going to let it ring a few times. But it's precisely when we are most hesitant, when we are afraid, that we are getting really strong, important information that this is precisely the thing that we should do and that this is precisely the direction that we should go. You have to be willing to look stupid. That's what Epictetus says. He says, "If you wish to improve, you must be willing to look clueless or stupid about some things." I think that means, one, you have to be willing to ask dumb questions. If you don't ask, you can't learn. If you're afraid of what other people think, you'll never learn what you don't know. But I think the other part is you have to be willing to not care about stuff, right? To be like, "I don't care about that. I'm not following that. I'm out of touch about that." That's one part.

• 25:09Ryan Holiday?

  And I think the other part is you have to be willing to be bad at stuff, right? To be at the beginner stages, to be embarrassingly figuring it out, to be mediocre, to be in the process of rediscovering or changing or growing. So if you want to improve, the Stoics say you have to be willing to look stupid, to look embarrassed, to be ridiculous, to not be good, because that's how you get from where you are to where you want to go. If I had to give you Stoicism in the simplest definition I possibly could, I'd just say this: The Stoics believed it's not what happens that's important, it's how we respond to what happens. We don't control the outside world, but we control what we do in reaction to the outside world. We control how we rise to face obstacles.

• 25:52Ryan Holiday?

  We decide what we make of the opportunities that life throws at us. We don't control what happens, we control how we respond. That's Stoicism. You have two options: want things to turn out a certain way, or you could welcome them the way they happen, Epictetus says. He says, "You could want them to turn out as you want them to, or you could decide that you want them to turn out how they've turned out." And so this is essentially the discipline, for the Stoics, this is the discipline of assent. Are you going to wish things are a certain way?

• 26:19Ryan Holiday?

  Certain way you're gonna accept them as they are. That doesn't mean you accept the injustices of the world per se. But it means if it's raining, you're happy that it's raining. If it's cloudy, you're happy that it's cloudy. If it's sunny and hot, you're happy that it's sunny and hot. If you're born short, you're happy that you're short. If you're tall, you're happy that you're born tall. You accept things as they are. You make the most of it. This is what the idea of a more bhakti is. Accept thing, be happy that things are the way that they are. That you were given what you've been given and then get to work using it. That's what Stoicism is about. You don't have to let this get to you. Mark Spilius says, you don't have to let it upset you. You always have the option to have no opinion, he says. You can just let it go.

• 27:03Ryan Holiday?

  You can let it drift by like clouds as the Buddhists talk about when they talk about thoughts. You don't have to let it sink in, don't have to let it harm you. You don't have to let it get you riled up. You don't have to get worked up. You don't have to respond. You can just let it go. I want you to know that. Don't have to let this get to you. You can just let it go. Stoicism is incredibly simple. It's one thing. It's the idea that we don't control what happens, but we always control how we respond to what happens. We decide what we're gonna make of it. We decide what we're gonna do in response to it. We don't control the outside world. We control our own internal world, our thoughts, our emotions, our reactions. That's it. Very little is needed for a happy life, according to the Stoics.

• 27:48Ryan Holiday?

  Musonius Rufus, one of the great Stoics, he's exiled four times. And what does he learn, losing everything? He learns how much he was taking for granted. Yes, he misses Rome. He doesn't like being far away, but he reminds himself, did I actually experience Rome while I was there? What do I actually need to be happy? He says, I need a little bit of food. I need water. I need sunshine. I had those things in Rome. He sort of noticed that he's like one of those people that lives in New York City and brags about all its amenities, but he never took advantage of them. And he realized that actually the simple life was better. The simple life was more philosophical. And that he needed very little to be happy and that what he had was enough. It's funny, the biggest book project I ever sold, I wasn't trying to think of my next project. I wasn't trying to make money. I was actually on a hike with my family, with my kids.

• 28:33Ryan Holiday?

  We were outside, we were out in nature. I wasn't thinking about work at all. And suddenly, the idea for my next series, actually, a series of four books popped into my head. And I've been working on that now for two years. It was lucrative, but more than that, it was creatively fulfilling and challenging. It's all these things. And that came because I took a few moments of stillness. I decided to go on the hike. I put work aside. And as it happened, work popped into my head. I'm looking at the sunset on my farm. And it's moments like this, when you're actually not working, when you're consciously not thinking, that sometimes your best work, your best ideas pop into your head. That was true for the Stoics, it's true for the great artists of all time, and it's true for you and I and normal people. You gotta have time for stillness and reflection and peace. Seneca talks about taking wandering walks, about giving the mind over to relaxation. It's more important than you think.

• 29:17Ryan Holiday?

  And in fact, it may be where the biggest breakthrough of your life comes from. One of the best stories in all of Stoicism comes at the founding of Stoicism. Zeno, he's this successful merchant who comes from a long family of merchants. And he suffers a shipwreck and he loses everything. He washes up in Athens, he has nothing. And there, he discovers philosophy. That's how Stoicism starts. And so reflecting on this journey, this, this thing that he never would have wished happening, changing the entire course of his life, and then, and now history, we wouldn't be talking had he not gone through this. He says, "I made a prosperous voyage when I suffered a shipwreck." Meaning, the worst thing that ever happened to him was actually the best thing that ever happened to him. And that's what a Stoic says. We don't control what happens, bad stuff is going to happen. But we control how we respond to it, we control what we turn it into.

• 30:00Ryan Holiday?

  And whatever it is, whatever metaphorical shipwreck you're going through, you can make it a prosperous voyage if you think about it that way. You have to remember that your anxiety is not being caused by external things. Your frustrations are not being caused by external things. No one is responsible for your emotions but yourself. I know that's easy to say, it's very hard to put in practice. I struggle with it all the time. But that's the idea. Marcus really says, "I escaped my anxiety today." He says, "No, I discarded it because it was within me." He is the cause of his own anxiety. He is what brings that to external events, not the other way around. And we have to remember that always. No one can make you upset, no one can make you mad, no one can make you sad. No one can make you feel inferior, as Eleanor Roosevelt says, without your consent.

• 30:44Ryan Holiday?

  We are complicit in those emotions. We choose to have them. External things are not responsible for them. You do the right thing, and then nobody notices. Or you do the right thing, and then you see somebody else get away with doing the wrong thing. This is frustrating. It's annoying. It's demoralizing. But Marcus Rios says, "You can't think about that." He says, "You don't look for the third thing. You did something good. That's one thing. You felt good for doing it. The third thing is recognition, credit, reciprocation, acknowledgement. Don't think about that. Your job is to do the right thing, to be a good person, to do what you know is right, to do what you think the situation calls for, to do the things other people aren't willing to do. Everything else is extra. Do you get it sometimes? Sure. Great. Enjoy

• 31:25Ryan Holiday?

  it when you do. But you can't look for it. You can't expect it because, one, it's unnecessary. Two, it'll disappoint you when you don't get it. Three, if you're doing it for that thing, and you repeatedly don't get it, which is true, you won't, you'll be demoralized, and you won't keep doing it. So you do it because it's the right thing. Everything else is extra. Epictetus would ask, "How much longer are you going to wait to demand the best for yourself?" Marcus Rios says, "You could be good today, but instead you choose tomorrow. We put stuff off. This is the resistance." Stephen Pressfield, the great writer, says, "It's not that we say, 'I'm never going to write my symphony. I'm never going to go out for that. I'm never going to put myself out there.' We say, 'I'm going to do it tomorrow.' We wait. We put it off. The Stoics say, 'You can't do it. You've got to do it now.'" Seneca says, "All fools have this one thing in

• 32:07Ryan Holiday?

  common. They're always beginning to live. They're getting ready to live. They're not doing it now. They put it off." You can't put it off. Procrastination is the enemy. It's the enemy of progress. It's the enemy of the present moment. It's the enemy of doing your best. Don't put stuff off. Don't do it later. Don't say, "I'm going to work out tomorrow." Don't put it off. Do it now. Five rules from the Stoics that will help you handle rude and difficult people in your life. First and foremost, let's give them the benefit of the doubt. Marcus Rios says, "You have to recognize in the wrongdoer a nature similar to your own. They are us. We are them." Two, accept that rude people are a part of life. They are inescapable. Wake up in the morning and tell yourself, "I'm going to see rude people. I'm going to see idiots. I'm going to see selfish-

• 32:49Ryan Holiday?

  People, it's a fact of life. You can't go around being surprised when you see something you knew you were gonna see. Three, the best revenge to the Stoics is living well. Marcus Aurelius says, "The way you get even is by not being like that." Four, try to be indifferent. "We want to live a good life," Marcus Aurelius says, "and then be indifferent to what makes no difference." If other people suck, if other people get away with being awful, is that gonna change us? Is that gonna make us want to be different? No, it doesn't matter. Five, we want to zoom way, way, way out. When you see things from a distance, out of an airplane window, it becomes so much smaller. You don't take these people so seriously, and then you move on and you focus on what's up to you. Marcus Aurelius didn't like people. You can't read Meditations and not see this.

• 33:30Ryan Holiday?

  He opens Meditations with a meditation on how frustrating and obnoxious other people are. And even this idea, this idea of the obstacle is the way, that quote is him talking about other people, about how people get in our way, how people present obstacles. But he says that in that obstacle, there's an opportunity to actually practice this philosophy that you say you believe, to be good in spite of other people, to be just in the face of injustice, to be temperate in the face of intemperance that's being rewarded, to be courageous when everyone else is being cowardly and being rewarded for it. So for the Stoics, people are frustrating, people are an obstacle, but like all obstacles, they're also the way. There's something, a challenge we can rise to meet,

• 34:15Ryan Holiday?

  we can be better for wrestling with other people's difficulties. So don't resent people, use them to become better. The sad fact is that the world has always been ugly and awful. People have always been selfish and cruel and short-sighted. Marcus Aurelius is there in the decline and fall of the Roman Empire. Seneca has to live under Nero's rule. In fact, five other terrible emperors in his lifetime. I really like this passage from Marcus Aurelius. He lists all the crappy things that he's gonna experience that day, and he says, "But no one can implicate me in ugliness." You can still be good, you can still be you, you don't have to give up, you don't have to get down and dirty with it, you stay above it, you stay true to yourself, that's all you can do. You are going to die, that is a fact. We are all going to die. Death is the prophecy that never fails. Every single

• 35:00Ryan Holiday?

  One of us that was born is gonna die. And I wear this ring on my finger. It says memento mori. What does that mean? Memento mori means you're gonna die. Marcus Aurelius says, "You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think." He says, "Let every thought and action be that of a dying man." I promise, if you live with death in mind, you will live better, you will live more fully, and you will be so much happier. The joke about Winston Churchill was that he spent his whole life practicing his impromptu remarks. That what people thought was off the cuff, what people thought was just perfect timing, was in fact perfectly practiced and perfectly scripted. We wanna think that it just happened. But great things don't usually just happen. They were practiced, they were prepared, they were meticulously done, they were boiled down to their very essence. And so you have to realize that.

• 35:44Ryan Holiday?

  You're not gonna be great off the cuff. You have to practice, you have to prepare, you have to go over, you have to toss out all the things that were pretty good, but not good enough. When you read Meditations, it feels so perfectly done. It's almost inconceivable that this was a man's private diaries. This is what he settled on after crossing out 100 extra versions. This is the best of his insights over years, decades of his life. If you wanna be great, you have to practice, you have to prepare, you have to go over it over and over and over again. You have to have extremely high standards. Only then does it look effortless. I don't know who needs to hear this, but the best revenge, whatever they did, however hurtful it was, the best revenge, according to the Stoics, is to not be like that. Marcus Aurelius was betrayed, he was hurt,

• 36:28Ryan Holiday?

  he was schemed again. He saw awful, frustrating people, but he realized that the best revenge is to not be like that. Does that mean there's no accountability? That there's never punishments? That there's no justice? No, of course not. That is part of leadership and it's part of life. But the revenge, the way to get payback, is not to inflict your anger on other people. It's not to be like them. It's to be not like them. Because you realize that that is not only the wrong thing to do, but it's punishment to yourself. One of my favorite passages in all of Meditations, Marcus Aurelius talks about being "the rock that the waves crash over and eventually fall still around." There's something really special about water. I just went for this swim in Lake Michigan. But I'm just standing here. By the water, listening to the waves, trying to sort of slow myself down.

• 37:13Ryan Holiday?

  I have a talk I have to give later today. I have to travel later today. I have a bunch of stuff I have to do, but I want to, I want to get in that place of stillness. Eusthemia, as Seneca talks about, tranquility. I want to get to a place of peace. Even though everything is crazy, it's slowing down around me and I'm going to be able to do what I have to do for the day. You have to search for this idea that struggle is difficult. Or, you know, like the title of your book, the obstacle is the way. Like getting through things is how you, you build a stronger foundation. It's how you develop character. It's how the mind understands how to manage difficult situations. Well, and I think it's a transferable skill. So like, Yes. You're doing it in the cold plunge or running or fighting or whatever.

• 37:54Ryan Holiday?

  And then when you're like, when I'm working on a book and books are hard, you know, and they're like halfway through, I'm like, this isn't coming together. This sucks. Should I stop? I'm like, I know this feeling very well and I know that you don't listen to this feeling. So like fuck off because you're going to go through hard things in life. And you want to have cultivated a sense of like not quitting when things are hard. Three key lessons from the Stoic. Number one, amor fati. It happened. It is what it is. Fighting against it, resisting it, wishing it were otherwise. It doesn't make it so. You accept it and then you work with it. You don't resent your fate. You embrace your fate. Can you make the most of it?

• 38:34Ryan Holiday?

  Two, it's about what we do for and with other people. Yeah, it's a philosophy of individualism. But Marcus Bries talks about the common good like 40 times in meditations. He says, the fruit of this life is good character and acts for the common good. It's about leaving this place a little bit better than we found it. It's not just about us. It's about what we do for others. And then three, and I think this puts the others in perspective, it's the idea of memento mori. You've been dying since the minute you were born. Life is very short. The Stoics would say, memento mori, don't take a second, a person, an experience for granted. Be present for it. Enjoy it. Memento mori. The first thing you have to do is just not make stuff worse.

• 39:15Ryan Holiday?

  As Marcus Aurelius says, "How much more harmful are the consequences of anger and grief than the circumstances that arouse them in us?" That was today's entry in the Daily Stoic. Marcus Aurelius would have agreed with the first rule of holes, which is that when you're in one, stop digging. Just don't make it worse. So often, our overreactions, our emotional reactions, the way we take things personally, the way we despair, it takes a hard problem and it makes them worse. So today, what I want you to do is just focus on not adding to your troubles. As Seneca says, "I choose not to be a hindrance to myself. I choose not to complain about what's happened. I'm going to focus on what I can do with what happened." So the idea for the Stoics is, we don't make our problems worse.

• 39:59Ryan Holiday?

  We focus on what we control, how we can make them better, and we just get to work. It's impossible to learn that which you think you already know. That's Epictetus describing, I think, what ego does to us. If you think you already know something, you're prevented from learning. If you think you know, you won't ask questions. If you think you know, you can't get corrected. So actually, all knowledge, all improvement, comes from a place of humility. Socrates is considered wise not because of what he knew, but because of what he knew he didn't know. And the Socratic method is what? It's the asking of questions. So certainty, statements, are the antithesis of knowledge. Questions, openness, curiosity, is the way to wisdom. Stuff happens, right? A pandemic comes and disrupts your life.

• 40:44Ryan Holiday?

  You get dumped, you get robbed, you make a mistake that costs you a business or an opportunity. Someone hurts you, someone breaks your heart. Stuff is going to happen in life. But the question the Stoics say is, what did you learn? What did you take from this that makes you better? When we talk about this idea of the obstacle is the way, one of the ways we can always turn an obstacle into an opportunity is by learning from what caused this, by learning about ourselves for going through it, by learning how to prevent it from happening next time, by experiencing something, going through something, acquiring something through the experience that makes us better in the future. Question today, whatever you're going through, whatever you're regretting, whatever you're dreading is, but what did I learn? What will I learn from this?

• 41:28Ryan Holiday?

  How will I be better for having gone through it? So this is what's crazy about Marcus. So Marcus lives in Rome, the Romans speak Latin, but the philosophical language at that time was Greek. So Marcus was writing to himself in Greek. When you read those passages or you listen to them and you're just like, that is one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard. Like, there's this one passage where he's like, he talks about like this, a stalk of grain bending low under its own weight, the way olive falls to the ground. He talks about the way that when you put bread in the oven, it breaks open on top and we don't know why that happens. It's just this like beautiful inadvertent act of nature. He's just like writing like a poet, like a great writer. And again, he's writing in his non-native tongue to himself, never expecting anyone would see it.

• 42:11Ryan Holiday?

  It'd be like finding out that's like a comedian is like funny in their diary. You're just like, wow, you're just naturally that. You're not turning it on or off. Right. It's just like intuitively part of you. There's a great expression that you become like your friends. Show me who you spend time with, the expression goes, and I'll show you who you are. The Stoics have a slightly different tweak on that. They say you become what you give your attention to. So if you watch nothing but polarizing political news, you are going to become a polarizing, politics-obsessed person. If you watch nothing but celebrity gossip, if you spend all your time following influencers on Instagram, you will become like that. But if you immerse yourself in great book, if you look for things that are positive, things that are empowering,

• 42:54Ryan Holiday?

  that is also what you will become. You become what you pay attention to. You become where you focus. Marcus really says, we are dyed by the color of our thoughts. I think we're also dyed by the influences. We are what we eat, what we put in through our eyes and our ears. So what are your influences? What are you taking in that's going to determine who you are? And most of all, I think it will determine. Quality of your life. Commander James Stockdale is shot down over Vietnam. And as he's parachuting down into death or capture, he actually says to himself, I'm leaving the world of technology, entering the world of Epictetus. The most fascinating part of Stockdale in this prison camp, where he spent seven years being tortured near death,

• 43:35Ryan Holiday?

  is he says to himself that although the optimists in the camp got crushed, the people who thought it'd be over soon, the people who thought it'd be easy, the people that thought rescue was right around the corner. He said, I unflinchingly accepted the reality of my situation. But he said, I also knew that if I survived, I was going to behave in such a way and respond to the adversity that I faced in a way that meant this was an event that in retrospect I would not trade. And Stockdale is an incredible example of how a man in harrowing, horrible conditions turned it into a platform and an opportunity for great heroism and kindness and resilience and strength. There's a great story about Napoleon, who famously wouldn't read his mail until three weeks after it arrived.

• 44:18Ryan Holiday?

  He knew that most problems will resolve themselves. If you're so reachable, you will be inserting yourself into things that you don't need to be inserted on. You will be spending time on things that will resolve themselves. You can imagine Marcus Rilis doing a similar strategy, or Epictetus, or Seneca. The idea of responding to everything in real time, to being on top of everything in real time. Not only is this not a recipe for productivity, it's a recipe for misery, too. You have to be willing not to know every single thing that's going on, to not be so reachable that anyone can interrupt you in your concentration at any time. Follow Napoleon's advice. Sleep with your phone in the other room. Leave your phone in the other room, and you're going to do something important. Don't be so reachable. Seneca said that the mind must be taken on wandering walks. He said, otherwise you'll break.

• 45:03Ryan Holiday?

  You'll be too tense. I totally agree. I try to start my day with a walk, and I try to end my day with a walk. I don't even consider it exercise, although it is that. To me, it's putting the body in motion. It's slowing the mind down. I'm getting outside. I'm connected with nature. Maybe I'm having a conversation with someone else that I care about. And even though I'm moving, I'm getting closer to a place of still. Walking to me is a magical cure-all. If you're not doing it every day, you're not as happy or as fit. So if you're not walking every day, you're not as happy or as healthy as you could be. So listen to the Stoics and take a walk. One of the things I like to do when I come to a cemetery like this is actively think about these people who are buried here.

• 45:47Ryan Holiday?

  This person behind me was born in 1870, died in 1931. The other was born in 1872 and died in 1946. I don't just like to think about what they experienced, what they saw, but I go, this is a person with hopes and dreams. This is a person, maybe they had power, maybe they had fame. Maybe they wrote books. Maybe they had perfect health. Maybe they were beautiful. And where are they now? They're dead. They're buried in this marble box and nobody knows and nobody cares. And this is supposed to humble us and sober us up. It's supposed to be that we don't take life for granted, but that we also don't prioritize and obsess over the wrong things. All we have is who we are in this present moment. And when I walk through a cemetery like this, it's just a very visceral reminder

• 46:31Ryan Holiday?

  of the effemorality and the shortness of life and why we can't take it for granted.