Olivia Munn

Actress Olivia Munn feels so excited and amazed about being Conan O’Brien’s friend. Olivia sits down with Conan to discuss accidentally creating core memories for her kids, breaking the family mold by pursuing acting, and advocating for breast cancer awareness and early detection after her own diagnosis. Later, Conan tests his modern slang while he and his team Review the Reviewers. Breast Cancer Lifetime Risk Assessment: https://magview.com/ibis-risk-calculator/

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Conan O'Brien?

  Now Sona, clearly I'm a very important person to you.

• 0:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:05Conan O'Brien?

  Just accept the premise and we'll move ahead.

• 0:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 0:08Conan O'Brien?

  I'm a very important person to you. What would you get me from Macy's for the holidays?

• 0:13Speaker 01

  A vase.

• 0:15Conan O'Brien?

  No, I don't want a vase. I want something better.

• 0:17Speaker 01

  A jacket.

• 0:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, nice jacket. I love a nice jacket.

• 0:20Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, that jacket. Nice jacket.

• 0:21Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, so now you have to do it, because you said you would.

• 0:23Speaker 01

  Aw man, I didn't know you were doing that.

• 0:25Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I know the holidays, I know the holidays are months away, but it's never too early, Sona, to find gifts that I will love, gifts I will wear, and surprises that make the season unforgettable for me.

• 0:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 0:37Conan O'Brien?

  Macy's Gift Guide makes holiday shopping easy with beauty favorites, stylish fashion, jewelry, cozy essentials, must-have toys, home upgrades, and picks for every person on your list. Coach handbags, Breville appliances, Lego UG, and more, all in one place so you can skip the scrolling and shop with confidence. Shop now in-store or online at macy's.com/giftguide.

• 1:03Conan O'Brien?

  You looking for something sweet and satisfying?

• 1:04Speaker 01

  Always.

• 1:05Conan O'Brien?

  Meet Wonderful Pistachios Chocolate Sea Salt and Chocolate Toffee, your go-to treats.

• 1:11Speaker 01

  Mmm.

• 1:11Conan O'Brien?

  Each pistachio is thinly, not thickly, thinly dipped in dark chocolate antioxidant goodness.

• 1:19Speaker 01

  The way you said that, thinly and thickly was uncomfortable.

• 1:22Conan O'Brien?

  It doesn't overwhelm the pistachio. They know what they're doing. I'm so glad they made the right choice.

• 1:28Conan O'Brien?

  Or discover Wonderful Pistachios Dubai Chocolate, the sweet indulgence you didn't know you needed with rich dark chocolate, smooth white chocolate, crispy katafi, and a delicious crunchy pistachio. I'm telling you, snack time never tasted so good.

• 1:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:42Conan O'Brien?

  Look it up in history. It never has. Never has.

• 1:46Speaker 01

  Can you?

• 1:46Conan O'Brien?

  Check out wonderfulpistachios.com to learn more about Wonderful Pistachios chocolate products.

• 1:54Speaker 02

  Hi, my name is Olivia Mutt.

• 2:00Speaker 02

  Is that how you pronounce it? Yeah. And I feel so excited and amazed about being Conan O'Brien's friend.

• 2:09Speaker 03

  That's so sweet.

• 2:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:32Conan O'Brien?

  Hey, everybody. Welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. This is a very good day.

• 2:36Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 2:37Conan O'Brien?

  Because I'm joined, of course, by Sonum of Sesian.

• 2:40Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 2:41Conan O'Brien?

  But today marks the return, the heroic return, of our good friend and associate, Matt Gourley. Yeah.

• 2:49Speaker 03

  Come on, guys. I like the heroic part just fine.

• 2:54Conan O'Brien?

  We've missed you, seriously.

• 2:56Speaker 03

  I've missed you guys.

• 2:56Conan O'Brien?

  Seriously.

• 2:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:57Conan O'Brien?

  We've missed you. And just to update everybody, you've been on a paternity leave for... No, no. I only bring it up because I think it's a world record. It says, you know. No. Your daughter was born, I believe, eight years ago.

• 3:18Speaker 03

  She's a freshman in college.

• 3:19Conan O'Brien?

  Oh. How's she doing?

• 3:20Speaker 03

  Oh, she's great. She's great.

• 3:23Conan O'Brien?

  No, you've been out for a little while. You've been out for a couple of months.

• 3:25Speaker 03

  I did. I took a little extended one, and it was the greatest thing. It was fantastic. I mean, I missed you guys, I did. But, man.

• 3:32Conan O'Brien?

  Well, how's it going? Bring us up to date.

• 3:34Speaker 03

  It's going really well. I was able to spend a lot of time with my older daughter, which, you know, was kind of magical. And then my youngest daughter has just fit right in. And, you know, not to get too sentimental, but sometimes when you have those moments in your life that you know to be the best moments, but you only know it after they're done. This was one, I could tell when I was in, that it was just amazing.

• 3:55Conan O'Brien?

  That's really nice. I'm happy that you had that. And also resentful.

• 3:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 4:00Conan O'Brien?

  That you took so much time. Let me tell you something.

• 4:02Speaker 03

  Well, part of the happiness was I wasn't here.

• 4:03Conan O'Brien?

  Exactly. When my daughter was born, I took 20 minutes. And when my son was born, I took four. Now, let me also just add to that, I'm a terrible father and an awful human being. So, yes, am I saying this is the way to go?

• 4:19Speaker 01

  You could have asked for some time.

• 4:20Conan O'Brien?

  I could have asked for some time. That was on me. I think I, I took, it was a commercial break. We were doing the late night show.

• 4:26Speaker 03

  The best part is he didn't even have to ask for time. He could have just told people he's taking time.

• 4:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 4:30Speaker 01

  I know. I want to say something, though, about your paternity leave, real quick. It feels like you kept releasing other podcast episodes. It feels like you took a break only from us. And you were still doing all your other podcasts.

• 4:45Speaker 03

  I recorded those all before the baby was born.

• 4:47Conan O'Brien?

  Not true.

• 4:47Speaker 03

  True story.

• 4:48Conan O'Brien?

  You can hear two kids crying in the background. Unless one of them's your wife having a nervous breakdown. And you often refer to the day's news as you were-

• 4:57Speaker 03

  I held up a newspaper during each recording.

• 4:59Conan O'Brien?

  As you were hosting Mall Walkin'. You were, you know, I mean, first of all-

• 5:03Speaker 01

  Mall Walkin'.

• 5:05Conan O'Brien?

  You-

• 5:06Speaker 03

  We might do Baby Walkin'.

• 5:08Conan O'Brien?

  Um, no, listen, I understand. Those are more, those are priority shows.

• 5:11Speaker 03

  I didn't record them. All I did was watch World War II movies and Dirty Harry movies with my baby while I held her.

• 5:18Conan O'Brien?

  I think that's the best thing for a little baby girl to be hearing.

• 5:22Speaker 03

  She was into it.

• 5:23Conan O'Brien?

  Make my day, punk. And, um, lots of people getting blowed up. It was a great thing for a little forming brain.

• 5:31Speaker 03

  It was heaven for me.

• 5:32Conan O'Brien?

  As that fontanelle is starting to seal-

• 5:34Speaker 03

  It was pulsing while we were watching it. It was crazy.

• 5:37Conan O'Brien?

  Um, all right, I have some questions. How is, your, your youngest daughter's name is?

• 5:42Speaker 03

  You're talking about Nell the Smell?

• 5:44Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 5:45Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, I thought it was, I thought you were gonna go, so Nell.

• 5:46Speaker 03

  Nell, yeah.

• 5:47Conan O'Brien?

  Um, how is Nell different?

• 5:49Speaker 03

  She is night and day different than my first daughter. My first daughter is this wonderful tempest, like, just so funny, so crazy. Nell just came out, smile, every time you see her, just a big smile. She just sits there. She's a wonderful little lump on the log. So, we got one of each, which kind of magnifies their differences in such a wonderful way. I don't know, it's, I just feel great. I feel lucky. Yeah, yeah.

• 6:13Conan O'Brien?

  And first of all, you have, you came in, you seem, seem very happy. You've got that kind of, doesn't he not have a glow?

• 6:20Speaker 03

  You have a glow. Well, I birthed the children. Oh, did you now? It's the postpartum glow. Okay, oh, that sounds fun.

• 6:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, that's why he had such a long paternity leave. Yes.

• 6:29Speaker 04

  He did. Sorry, Matt, you can edit this out if you want to. He did say, when we were sitting around earlier, he did say that, uh, how did, I forget how to rephrase it. This time around, he gained a little more weight than the first time. And we were like, for your pregnancies, or?

• 6:42Speaker 03

  I was trying to explain, and now you're gonna make me, uh. No, I'm not gonna make fun of you. I wonder about how your body changed. I wanna hear about this.

• 6:49Conan O'Brien?

  No, I'm glad Adam brought this in, because you're a big fat fuck now.

• 6:55Conan O'Brien?

  He, I mean, you're lis-, you're all listening, but when you waddled in today.

• 7:00Speaker 03

  I did put on 10 pounds. Isn't that crazy? Waddled in?

• 7:04Conan O'Brien?

  10? Hello?

• 7:05Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 7:06Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, I think, I don't know.

• 7:07Speaker 03

  I had read somewhere that. Oh, you're gonna, oh, you're still going down this road. Oh, no.

• 7:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, go ahead. I wanna hear it.

• 7:13Speaker 03

  I hate to do this kind of, because what if this is just bullshit?

• 7:16Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 7:16Speaker 03

  But that, there is this evolutionary sort of process to men in postpartum, that they lose testosterone temporarily, and it's a kind of thing to keep them historically tied to the mother and child.

• 7:30Conan O'Brien?

  From straying, yeah.

• 7:32Speaker 03

  From straying. And, and it's a kind of thing that that has evolved over time in the survival of those fittest people, because the father was there with the child and the mother.

• 7:41Conan O'Brien?

  So you're, so, so I'm, so I'm curious, how does this relate to you gaining weight?

• 7:46Speaker 03

  There can be some sympathy weight gained because of the loss of testosterone, apparently.

• 7:50Conan O'Brien?

  You also walked in, he's got huge breasts now. You have huge lactating breasts, and you're a big fat fuck. And I don't mean either of those in a derogatory way.

• 8:01Speaker 03

  No, no.

• 8:01Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, big fat fuck with titties.

• 8:06Conan O'Brien?

  But when you waddled, when you waddled in, waddled in here, wearing, uh, his, uh, his D cup, I was.

• 8:15Speaker 03

  I did come in, I'm ready to bog out.

• 8:18Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 8:20Conan O'Brien?

  But, but so you gained some weight, but you, you still look good.

• 8:23Speaker 03

  Thanks. I don't feel good.

• 8:26Conan O'Brien?

  Do you think, do you feel like your testosterone levels had dropped?

• 8:31Speaker 03

  You mean, am I out there just hounding it?

• 8:35Speaker 03

  Hounding it? Let me see. Pound, is it pounding it, though? No, I tend to hound. Okay, all right.

• 8:41Conan O'Brien?

  Hounding it, hounding his creditors for more time.

• 8:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's what I mean.

• 8:46Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Oh, I'm hounding it all right. You're doing what?

• 8:49Speaker 03

  Uh, I don't, I think so. I mean, I've been certainly been like a sentimental mess in a, in a sort of like good way.

• 8:56Speaker 02

  That's sweet.

• 8:57Speaker 03

  Just every single thing knocks me down in a like kind of sweet way.

• 9:01Conan O'Brien?

  Well, that's nice.

• 9:02Speaker 03

  Well, I, yeah.

• 9:03Conan O'Brien?

  I don't think I've ever had.

• 9:04Speaker 02

  I was gonna say, did you?

• 9:06Conan O'Brien?

  No.

• 9:06Speaker 02

  Do you feel like your testosterone dipped? No?

• 9:09Conan O'Brien?

  Well, first of all.

• 9:10Speaker 02

  After, no, after your kids were born. I'm not asking current state.

• 9:14Conan O'Brien?

  But you know, my, my, uh, my mother-in-law, Pam, God rest her soul, she did say, I remembered once sort of talking about how I think I've grown wiser over the years. I'm not as intense as I used to be. I was very focused and very driven in my twenties and thirties and forties. And I said, I think I'm maturing. And she just, you know, she was an expert in these matters. And she just said, um, no, no, your testosterone level has dropped. Like, I was trying to credit it all to wisdom. And she was like, no, no, you just have less of that, you know, asshole juice running through your body.

• 9:47Speaker 03

  See, I went through a male pregnancy. He went through menopause.

• 9:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:50Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Oh, I did. I did. Yeah.

• 9:52Speaker 02

  Oh, that's nice.

• 9:52Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. I, I don't think that I got the sentimentality. I'm, I'm waiting for that part. You know, I don't get all mushy.

• 10:00Speaker 03

  You don't really ever?

• 10:01Conan O'Brien?

  I do. I, uh.

• 10:03Speaker 02

  When it comes to your kids especially.

• 10:04Conan O'Brien?

  No, just when I see old clips of late night.

• 10:06Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 10:09Conan O'Brien?

  Like, ah, look at him with Al Roker. 1994. No, um, no, I do. I, I do. I'm, I don't. Well, I'm just saying stuff, but I think, uh, but yeah, I am very, first of all, very glad you're back.

• 10:23Speaker 03

  Oh, I'm glad to be back.

• 10:24Conan O'Brien?

  Because you are a very important voice here on this show, as you know, and I say that, uh, with, with no ridicule or jokes attached to it.

• 10:34Speaker 03

  Or seriousness.

• 10:35Conan O'Brien?

  Or seriousness, or real honesty.

• 10:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:37Conan O'Brien?

  Um, no, but, uh, we're really happy.

• 10:39Speaker 03

  I am so glad to be back. I did miss you guys. I edited the show while I was gone. So it was really interesting to hear you guys, kind of feel like I was there in a one-way sort of way.

• 10:48Conan O'Brien?

  Were you ever, were you ever coming in with? If you're pounded crypts, but then realizing that you were just listening to us and you couldn't participate.

• 10:56Speaker 03

  Of course, and I don't have any actual cash with me, but I'm making a hundred dollar bill that I would like to send to Eduardo for his lil bitch, put you in your place. Yay, that's right.

• 11:07Conan O'Brien?

  Well, that was an iconic moment in the podcast.

• 11:09Speaker 03

  It was.

• 11:10Conan O'Brien?

  When Eduardo called me lil bitch. Um, and you know what? Some people say our country is terribly divided. Unified the country. Yeah. Everyone, I don't care if you're a red state, blue state, uh, you know, Trumper, never Trumper. Everyone said, yes, that guy's a lil bitch.

• 11:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:28Conan O'Brien?

  Everybody. It was a beautiful moment.

• 11:29Speaker 03

  It was a really sweet, definitely sweet moment. Everybody in the country listening to lil bitch and big fat fuck with them titties. Yeah, big fat fuck with them titties.

• 11:37Conan O'Brien?

  We bring people together.

• 11:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:39Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, with our special brand of the truth.

• 11:41Speaker 03

  Can we, uh, give a very special thank you to David Hopping for having covered for Borels? David was fantastic because I edited and I, I at a time was just like, they don't, they don't need me. He's great. You know what I mean?

• 11:54Conan O'Brien?

  No, we need you because I won't have, uh, I mean, David, I can take in small doses. And you know, I love David.

• 12:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 12:01Conan O'Brien?

  But he works Hilary Duff into every conversation. And, um, and I, listen, I, I, I like Hilary Duff. I'm gladly have her here on the pod.

• 12:10Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 12:10Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, yeah, whenever we clear up whatever legal thing we have between us. Um, but, uh, but yeah, he is so obsessed with Hilary Duff.

• 12:18Speaker 03

  Can I just shout out in all honesty, my wife who, who did all the work, obviously for, uh, for all of us. She's been amazing and so.

• 12:26Conan O'Brien?

  Amanda.

• 12:27Speaker 03

  The two girls, yeah.

• 12:28Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, Amanda, uh, your wife, very beautiful, very talented. You're a lucky man.

• 12:32Speaker 03

  I am.

• 12:33Conan O'Brien?

  Man, you're lucky.

• 12:34Speaker 03

  Yeah. Okay. Well, hold on.

• 12:35Conan O'Brien?

  Jesus Christ, you got lucked out.

• 12:37Speaker 03

  God.

• 12:38Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I'm just saying.

• 12:39Speaker 03

  Kind of creepy the way you're saying it.

• 12:41Conan O'Brien?

  I'm just saying, when he said, oh, you gotta meet my, when he said, you gotta meet my wife. I thought it was going to be like a broom with a face painted on it. Her name's Amanda. Say hi Amanda. Hello. I mean, come on. Gourley's wife?

• 12:56Speaker 03

  That's fair.

• 12:56Conan O'Brien?

  And this total smoke show comes walking in. She's gorgeous.

• 13:00Speaker 02

  The same could be said for you too.

• 13:02Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, please.

• 13:02Speaker 02

  I mean, both of you are really punching up.

• 13:04Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 13:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:05Conan O'Brien?

  I will.

• 13:06Speaker 02

  I mean, no offense, but oh my god, are you punching up?

• 13:09Conan O'Brien?

  No, people think that Liza, you know, that Liza visited me in the hospital.

• 13:15Speaker 03

  What do you mean?

• 13:16Conan O'Brien?

  They just think some total accident happened and that's how I got this woman. You know, like she was there and then accidentally got married.

• 13:23Speaker 03

  She had amnesia and you came in and went, "I'm your husband."

• 13:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 13:26Speaker 03

  "Thank god I found you."

• 13:27Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. And you think I'm handsome.

• 13:29Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 13:30Conan O'Brien?

  No, yes, we're both very lucky men.

• 13:33Speaker 02

  Yes, you are.

• 13:34Conan O'Brien?

  And you know, so as a lucky fella? Your husband.

• 13:37Speaker 02

  Tactiquezian.

• 13:37Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 13:38Speaker 02

  I can't believe I'm saying tactiquezian now. Tac, tac, tac.

• 13:42Conan O'Brien?

  You don't even know his last name, do you?

• 13:43Speaker 02

  No, it's Baroyan.

• 13:45Conan O'Brien?

  He isn't. It's tactiquezian.

• 13:46Speaker 02

  It's not tactiquezian, but yeah.

• 13:48Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, yeah. Anyway, this is getting really nice and everything, so I just want to get us back to ground zero.

• 13:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:54Speaker 03

  Please do.

• 13:54Conan O'Brien?

  You suck, you were way too loud.

• 13:56Speaker 03

  I'm fat.

• 13:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, and you're a fat fuck.

• 13:57Conan O'Brien?

  You're a fat guy now. Fat guy, you gotta lose the weight.

• 13:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, with your titties.

• 14:01Conan O'Brien?

  Your husband's name's tactiquezian, you're way too loud, and you don't help me as much as you should. I think we're all.

• 14:07Speaker 02

  Where did that come from? Why?

• 14:09Conan O'Brien?

  And I think we're all.

• 14:10Speaker 03

  And you're still a little bitch.

• 14:12Speaker 02

  What about you?

• 14:12Conan O'Brien?

  You're still a little bitch. No.

• 14:15Speaker 04

  One, two, three, little bitch.

• 14:18Speaker 02

  Oh, I can't, no, I can't, I honestly, I can't do it.

• 14:21Conan O'Brien?

  Why does it feel so right?

• 14:22Speaker 02

  I can't do it.

• 14:23Conan O'Brien?

  You can't do it?

• 14:23Speaker 02

  I honestly could not do it.

• 14:25Conan O'Brien?

  Why not?

• 14:25Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 14:26Conan O'Brien?

  You've called me everything.

• 14:27Speaker 03

  You actually called me a little bitch before.

• 14:29Speaker 02

  I'm sure I have. I've called you a dick, an asshole, but I can't, I don't know why little bitch hurts.

• 14:35Speaker 03

  Like job security?

• 14:36Speaker 02

  No. I think I just, I feel like it's, it's too far.

• 14:40Conan O'Brien?

  You think Eduardo went too far?

• 14:42Speaker 02

  No, I don't think he went too far. I think I would go too far, and I think it's because I was your assistant for so long.

• 14:47Conan O'Brien?

  Really?

• 14:48Speaker 02

  And I wouldn't want to.

• 14:48Conan O'Brien?

  I've never seen this side of you.

• 14:49Speaker 02

  Isn't that weird? I know, I don't know.

• 14:50Conan O'Brien?

  Wait a minute, you have some tiny bit of professional fear of me?

• 14:54Speaker 02

  I kinda do.

• 14:56Speaker 04

  Yes, that's incredible.

• 14:57Speaker 02

  I do, I mean, when he said it, everybody else was laughing and I like, was like, oh my god, Eduardo.

• 15:03Conan O'Brien?

  Eduardo was scared, he went home.

• 15:05Speaker 03

  I was, yeah.

• 15:06Conan O'Brien?

  He was really terrified that like it was over.

• 15:08Speaker 03

  I feel good about it now.

• 15:09Conan O'Brien?

  And then you remembered. And then you remembered who I am. Also, you probably went home thinking, it could be over for me, but if it is, totally worth it.

• 15:19Speaker 03

  What a way to go.

• 15:22Conan O'Brien?

  Anyone in the country would have hired you. Uh, well, super happy to have you back.

• 15:27Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 15:28Conan O'Brien?

  Um, and we've reunited, as you know, probably the, there's, isn't there a movie where they, there's different stones and they gotta put them in the glove?

• 15:36Speaker 03

  Yeah, the Shankar stones of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom?

• 15:39Conan O'Brien?

  Sure.

• 15:40Speaker 02

  Are you talking about Thanos and the Avengers?

• 15:42Conan O'Brien?

  I just knew that.

• 15:43Speaker 03

  No, we're talking about Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

• 15:45Speaker 02

  I don't know, there's a lot of stones that need to come together.

• 15:48Speaker 03

  Also, next week I'm back on maternity leave.

• 15:53Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, all right. You know my guest today from the TV show The Newsroom and the film X-Men Apocalypse. Now you can see her in the Apple TV Plus series, Your Friends and Neighbors. Very delighted to have her here today.

• 16:10Conan O'Brien?

  Olivia Munn, welcome.

• 16:16Speaker 02

  John and I have talked about this before, like, growing up, it's like to even think that you'd become Conan O'Brien's friend, let alone like, sitting here talking with you is like such a, it's a really hard thing to go back and be like, hey, like, one day, you're gonna be friends with Conan O'Brien. It's kind of, it's very surreal.

• 16:31Conan O'Brien?

  Well, that's a very nice thing to say, um, but-

• 16:33Speaker 03

  Spend a little time with him.

• 16:36Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, you'll see, very quickly. I think in 10 minutes, you'll want out. You'll want out very badly. Um, but you know, I'm, I'm so happy you're here, and we were chatting just before we came in here to do the pod. I call it pod because there's not time to say podcast.

• 16:50Speaker 02

  Okay, you saved a lot of time with doing that.

• 16:53Conan O'Brien?

  I did, and we should stop now. Uh, but we were chatting and you were just talking about how, which I can relate to, and I think you can relate to, Matt, but you're tired. You're tired because you're, you've been taking care of your kids and you just said, "I am so tired." And I said, "Trust me, this podcast today is gonna be your timeout." But you're going through the same thing.

• 17:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, newborn, I gotta-

• 17:15Speaker 02

  What?

• 17:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'm, I mean, she's great, she's one, what do I do? Do I talk?

• 17:21Conan O'Brien?

  That's right, this is your first, this is his first day back since a maternity leave. The children are now in their 30s. He's been gone for a really long time, yeah, but, um, and I think too long, but, um, we'll, we'll figure that out later. Uh, HR tells me I'm not allowed to bring it up, but,

• 17:39Conan O'Brien?

  but-

• 17:40Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 17:40Conan O'Brien?

  But you're tired. You're exhausted.

• 17:43Speaker 02

  I am pretty tired. I'm really tired. I was like, as I was coming in, John was like, have fun on Conan. I was like, I'm so tired. But I'm so excited to be here because I was saying like, like they're four and 19 months. And this crazy thing is that like, when everyone's there and like, we're happy to help and be there to help. My mom is there to help too, and my stepdad. Like, we want to be in the mess, you know, just be in it with them. And the problem is, is that just leaves us with nothing on the other side. So like, we're giving to our work and then we come home and it's like, we can do it all ourselves. And it's just, and I just feel.

• 18:15Conan O'Brien?

  I don't have that instinct.

• 18:16Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 18:17Conan O'Brien?

  When I come home, I'm very happy to say, because I have, we have a lot of help. I have, I have eight butlers. That's just me. I have, and I have people that carry me. Yeah, from the toilet to my other toilet.

• 18:31Speaker 02

  Because I go to the bathroom a lot.

• 18:33Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, oh, I'm constantly.

• 18:34Speaker 02

  Like, it's from one to the other?

• 18:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 18:35Speaker 02

  There's no stopping. They don't stop anywhere else.

• 18:37Speaker 03

  And there's a toilet on the little chariot they carry you to.

• 18:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I'm constantly, but my.

• 18:42Speaker 02

  By the way, if that's what's happening, I think you need it.

• 18:44Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. No, no, trust me.

• 18:46Speaker 02

  I don't think this is like vanity at all. I think there's something going on.

• 18:50Conan O'Brien?

  That's a really good point. And thank you for taking my side on this because, you know, my wife is always like, this is really necessary. I'm like, you have no idea. And that's where this is. But I think that's your problem is saying we want to be part of the, you know, you can meet the children later in life. Do you know what I mean? You can meet them later.

• 19:06Speaker 02

  You're saying her problem is that she wants to be involved with her kids.

• 19:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, what's that all about? I don't get it.

• 19:11Speaker 02

  Oh, okay. Okay.

• 19:13Conan O'Brien?

  People like Winston Churchill, he was raised by people on the estate. And then he was like brought to meet his parents at a certain age. I'm serious. They're like, "Come, it's time to go meet your father. Hello, father." You know, it was a weird thing.

• 19:26Speaker 03

  Your children call you by your first name, don't they?

• 19:28Conan O'Brien?

  Hello, Conan. Yes.

• 19:30Speaker 02

  Mr. Conan.

• 19:31Conan O'Brien?

  Mr. Conan. Exactly.

• 19:33Speaker 02

  Yeah. It's casual, but still like formal.

• 19:35Conan O'Brien?

  Super casual.

• 19:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, I just think, like, every little moment, just like, I think that John and I connect so much to our own childhoods. Like, we have such distinct memories of what our childhoods were like. And, and we see our children in our. So much. So I think it's like every time we are like, the funny thing is like Malcolm will do something and then he and I will both have it. John and I will both have a different reaction based on like what our childhood is. And that sometimes they're very, we're very different. He's Irish Catholic.

• 20:04Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 20:04Speaker 02

  You know, white collar family. And then I grew up in a military family with like my.

• 20:09Conan O'Brien?

  Your mom, a Vietn- Vietnamese refugee.

• 20:12Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 20:13Conan O'Brien?

  Right?

• 20:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:13Conan O'Brien?

  Who came here in nineteen seventy five.

• 20:15Speaker 02

  The day the war ended.

• 20:16Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 20:17Speaker 02

  Was out on the last, the last, um, the last boats out and, um, and.

• 20:22Conan O'Brien?

  So you have a completely different frame of reference than, than John Mulaney, Irish Catholic.

• 20:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like we, like the other day, like Malcolm was like, why can't we do this thing? And, and, um, and John was like, oh, well, because it's closed now. Everything is closed. And then I was like, at the same time, I was going, well, because we've decided that we're not going to do that because, and then, and we both looked at each other going like, which one do we, which way do we go? Like, what, what are we doing?

• 20:47Conan O'Brien?

  You didn't have your story straight.

• 20:48Speaker 02

  We did not. And we do that a lot. And then, then one of us will kind of start, start to talk slower. And that's the one, that's the cue to be like, we followed that person, whoever. So be like, no, it was, you know, we, it's closed. So we're not going to go today, but we're gonna go tomorrow. And then we're like, oh, okay. I don't.

• 21:05Conan O'Brien?

  So your kids now think you're just liars?

• 21:09Speaker 02

  That's what we're trying, we're trying to.

• 21:10Speaker 03

  Parenting is.

• 21:11Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 21:11Speaker 02

  We're trying to get.

• 21:12Speaker 03

  She has twins as well.

• 21:13Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 21:13Speaker 01

  I think, I think the three of us have kids that are around the same age.

• 21:17Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 21:17Speaker 01

  My boys, my boys turned five in July, yours is in October.

• 21:22Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 21:22Speaker 01

  And I think.

• 21:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's four.

• 21:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, just turned four at the end of November.

• 21:26Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 21:27Conan O'Brien?

  I used to tell our kids that Obama canceled it. I'm, I'm serious. I used to do that. I used to tell them, you know, Obama canceled it. That's why we can't do it. And they, they said, what? And I said, yeah, it was on CNN. And my, I think it was my daughter said, what is that? The Conan nonsense network?

• 21:43Speaker 03

  Oh, my God.

• 21:44Conan O'Brien?

  And I was like, okay, well, this doesn't work anymore.

• 21:46Speaker 02

  They're Republicans now.

• 21:48Speaker 03

  She was a Biden term.

• 21:49Conan O'Brien?

  She was two when she said that, yeah.

• 21:51Speaker 02

  I just said that to John just yesterday. I was talking about something that my mom had said to me that was so like flippant and innocuous. She wasn't even thinking. I know at that time she didn't think it was anything. But what she said I knew was a lie. Because it was just like when I was a five year old, you know, she was like, oh, whatever it was, was just like a little lie. And I, and it, I know in that moment, it course, the course changed from being like, I believe everything my mother says to being like, oh, you're just, you're not going to be telling the truth about things.

• 22:18Conan O'Brien?

  Right, right.

• 22:19Speaker 02

  And then I look at myself as an adult, I'll be like, ma, my mom knows everything. She's so annoying. She knows everything. She's always right. And yet I'll still be like, no, because that's my, my default is to be like, no, because I remember when it all changed for me.

• 22:31Conan O'Brien?

  You lied one time and I can never trust you again.

• 22:34Speaker 02

  Well, when, I think as a kid, like, you know, I said to John, we never know when we're creating a core memory. So like, there's things that my mom said and did that she will never, ever be like, I remember that. Because there was one time when, it's like in the eighties, right? So my mom would, had us, my sister and I, my stepsister, same age as me, came home from school, puts us to nap, and then I hear the door close. And I look outside, I go into the living room, she's in the van pulling out of the driveway. We're, nobody else is going to be home. We were like,

• 23:02Conan O'Brien?

  So you're alone.

• 23:02Speaker 02

  At four years old. But this is the eighties when you could like, you know, leave your kid at home, you go run and come back. And I ran out crying and screaming. Well, I thought she was leaving us. And she's annoyed. Now she's got to go back. She's like, okay, get back in the house. And then just being like, and then I was so confused, like now she's annoyed with me. Did I do something wrong? But she was leaving me. And it was just, and that became such a core memory for me.

• 23:24Speaker 03

  That's bold even for the eighties.

• 23:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:26Speaker 03

  That's pretty good.

• 23:27Conan O'Brien?

  Not for the seventies, but for the eighties.

• 23:29Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 23:30Speaker 02

  Well, we used to also in the pickup trucks, like, you know, sit in the back of the flatbed. But on the hump where the wheel is, we could sit in there, like, just, you know, a free ride through the highways. Like, no one, no one got in trouble then.

• 23:42Conan O'Brien?

  It was a different time.

• 23:43Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:44Conan O'Brien?

  I'm amazed at the things that we did in the, when I was growing up in the seventies. I just, you know, sometimes I wouldn't see my parents for months at a time.

• 23:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:53Conan O'Brien?

  I was left with just a map and a gold coin.

• 23:55Speaker 03

  I know. Just go on a full walkabout for three days in your hometown and just come back tan and dirty.

• 24:02Conan O'Brien?

  In the outback, yeah.

• 24:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:10Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 24:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:13Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 24:27Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 24:28Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 24:36Speaker 01

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 24:41Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5 N, which I love. Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 25:00Speaker 01

  Hello!

• 25:01Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View US News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

• 25:35Conan O'Brien?

  Did you know that one in four Americans targeted by scams end up falling for them? You fell for one.

• 25:40Speaker 01

  I fell for a scam.

• 25:42Conan O'Brien?

  Now, you didn't lose too much money, but you did lose.

• 25:44Speaker 01

  I did lose and it was very inconvenient and now they put protections on my account like I'm, uh, dumb.

• 25:50Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. I don't know where they got that impression.

• 25:54Conan O'Brien?

  Criminals are now using AI to make scams look more realistic than ever. In 2025, AI fraud spiked 1,210% and cost Americans $893 million. That's incredible. Well, with AI, it can get so smart now.

• 26:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:11Conan O'Brien?

  Do you know what I mean?

• 26:11Speaker 01

  Maybe I should start scamming.

• 26:13Conan O'Brien?

  No, that's not the point.

• 26:14Speaker 01

  Oh, no, that's not the point of this.

• 26:15Conan O'Brien?

  That's not the point.

• 26:15Speaker 01

  It's so much money.

• 26:17Conan O'Brien?

  Click, Sona can expose your information, putting you at risk of identity theft. Luckily, this is the point. Not that you should start scamming, but that everyone should get LifeLock.

• 26:26Speaker 02

  Right, right, right, right.

• 26:27Conan O'Brien?

  LifeLock has live US-based restoration specialists who will be with you every step of the way to fix your identity theft, from first alert to full restoration. This is fantastic. How do you not have this?

• 26:38Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 26:39Conan O'Brien?

  If you have expenses or money stolen due to identity theft, you're backed by the million-dollar protection package with up to $3 million coverage in some plans. Join now and save up to 30% off your first year. Go to lifelock.com/conan. That's lifelock.com/conan to save 30%. Terms apply.

• 26:57Conan O'Brien?

  Owning a car or home comes with responsibilities. Sure, it's fun, but sometimes it makes you wonder why you ever longed for adulthood in the first place. I do that all the time. I'm like, oh, these bills, these bills. What am I gonna do?

• 27:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:09Conan O'Brien?

  You know, when you own a house, you gotta fix it yourself. Sona, you see this to be true, right?

• 27:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, your garage door breaks, and you're like, well, I have to fix it.

• 27:17Conan O'Brien?

  Probably at first you said, hey, I'll get the super to fix it. It's your house, dude.

• 27:21Speaker 02

  It's mine, dude.

• 27:22Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Liberty Mutual customizes your car and home insurance to save you money. In fact, they work overtime to tailor your insurance policy around what you actually need. The only thing they can't do is get that liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty jingle out of your head.

• 27:34Speaker 02

  Liberty, liberty, liberty.

• 27:36Conan O'Brien?

  It's in my head all the time.

• 27:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, me too.

• 27:38Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Start your quote at libertymutual.com.

• 27:47Conan O'Brien?

  I can relate, obviously, to John and I have similar, you know, kind of lineage, and we're both comedy obsessives. Is he always trying to turn something into a comedic riff? Is that something he does at home, or not so much?

• 28:04Speaker 02

  No, I can't see him doing it, but it must be happening, because I'll be watching. Like, I haven't seen his stand-up until recently. We were in London, and I watched, and I was like, you've been, like, clocking all of this?

• 28:13Conan O'Brien?

  Core memories. You're making core memories.

• 28:16Speaker 02

  Everything is a core memory. Everything.

• 28:18Conan O'Brien?

  His latest special is called Core Memories.

• 28:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. No, it's, yeah, because, but I have noticed something with him that...

• 28:27Speaker 02

  You might relate to as like a comedian, because I've now I see it now with him. Is that like Malcolm said something the other day too, I think, and and when something's really funny, there's not a big reaction. It's just like, oh, yeah, uh huh. And like his his brain is already, it's almost like he's like writing it down in a notebook in his head.

• 28:43Conan O'Brien?

  Yes. You don't immediately laugh.

• 28:45Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 28:46Conan O'Brien?

  You just go, oh, that's very funny.

• 28:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 28:47Conan O'Brien?

  I see. Yes, that can be used later.

• 28:51Speaker 01

  No joy.

• 28:53Speaker 02

  But I think.

• 28:54Conan O'Brien?

  Sometimes there's not. Sometimes there's really not. There's like, ah, yes, that's very good. That's very good.

• 28:58Speaker 02

  I think it clicks. It just literally it flips a switch instead of like where the rest of us are just like, that's funny. I think it immediately flips this other switch. That's like, that is very funny. Let me log this down. Let me not forget the nuances of whatever this whole little moment was. So that happens a lot more than than I recognize. Like, you know, the first year we were together.

• 29:15Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, it's not as obvious as John saying, you know, you're, you know, your Malcolm falls down and he's like, wait a minute, I can use this. Keep crying so I get down what it's like. Um, we were talking just before we got started and I thought, I want to ask you about this because your early life, there is, you know, there's a lot happening. Your mom comes here. When she has you, where are you living? Is it Oklahoma?

• 29:40Speaker 02

  Oklahoma, I was born in Oklahoma City.

• 29:41Conan O'Brien?

  Oklahoma, but then it doesn't work out. Her marriage doesn't work out.

• 29:46Speaker 02

  My father cheats on my mother when I was six months old.

• 29:49Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, boy.

• 29:50Speaker 02

  And then she, yeah, she, my sister was two and a half. I was six months and my mom was had his dry cleaning and was going through his suit jacket and found two movie ticket stubs and went up and asked him like, did you go to the movies with somebody? And he said, yes. And she goes, was it a girl or a guy? He goes, it's a girl. He goes, is it a date? And he's like, yes. And then so she leaves and then, um.

• 30:13Conan O'Brien?

  Did she go to Japan?

• 30:15Speaker 02

  No, so she leaves. So my, okay, my mom and my mom, my grandmother and her nine children escaped Vietnam in the fall of Saigon. And in seventy five and they came out to Oklahoma because they, um, there was a, um, a Christian university president that was like, I'll sponsor all ten of you to come to Oklahoma. And they went there and then my mom went to university and everybody still. lived there in Oklahoma and then when my when she left my father she went back home to my grandmother's house with you know my uncles and everybody there to take you know take care of her and and us and my mom would tell stories about my dad coming to get us to for visitation and my uncles would be so mad and they'd pick up huge rocks and just throw them at him and like throw them at his car and like it was just they were just the Saigon came out in them.

• 31:00Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, what a ancient way of showing displeasure. Do you know what I mean?

• 31:05Speaker 03

  I'm gonna take a note for this podcast.

• 31:07Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I'm passive aggressive with you, Matt, but I don't pick up large boulders and throw them at you.

• 31:12Speaker 03

  But now that we know that's an option.

• 31:13Speaker 02

  It is an option.

• 31:14Conan O'Brien?

  But she so then she goes.

• 31:15Speaker 02

  So then and then eventually she she remarries my first stepfather. My mom's been married three times. My second stepfather, it's important to note that he is amazing. His name is Sam, but my first stepfather was not a good guy at all. It's really for 14 years of my life from like two to 16 and so she married him and he's in military and then that brought us to.

• 31:37Conan O'Brien?

  He was a bit of a like a rageaholic yelling person. Would you call him that?

• 31:41Speaker 02

  He was very abusive, abusive in many ways. And it's interesting like with abuse, right? Like like there was definitely screaming and yelling, but there wasn't like a rage like when you see in movies just somebody comes in, wow, what's going on in here? It was just like that, you know, your the your blood runs cold. You just feel, you know, you could just feel it. It's like when your kids are like dogs, right? Where you can feel things before anything is said. You could like it's raining outside and I would learn like later in life like, okay, rain that's actually bad because he might be late for work or somebody might did it and then he's going to come home and be really in a bad mood. So you just kind of like.

• 32:14Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 32:14Speaker 02

  clocking all these things. He wore always at home, he would wear like flip flops and so like the sound of like flip flops on linoleum because you know in a military housing, you have like the same kind of concrete floors that linoleum on on top of it and just like those kind of things that you just kind of perk up and go like, okay, someone's coming or danger's coming and.

• 32:32Conan O'Brien?

  Just before we came in here, you were talking about how you you seem like someone who obviously went through a great deal and then at some point had the strength and tenacity to say, I'm getting out of here because you talked about getting in your car and driving. This is, you know, when you're much older, but you decided I'm going to go to Los Angeles. You got in a car and you just started driving and you said, you know, your your car broke down at one point and you were looking for a replacement part on the side of the road.

• 32:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 33:00Conan O'Brien?

  There's this real fire in you like I am going to get out.

• 33:03Speaker 02

  I always wanted to be an actor. When I was like, uh, maybe 17 or so, my best friend gave me this book called An Actor's Guide, Your First Year in Hollywood. And I was like, page one, let's go. Here, we're gonna make it. And um, and so I had I told my mom that I wanted to be an actor and, you know, my mom being an immigrant was like, oh, that's not, you know, my, my mom and her siblings all came to America with nothing and they all have like, you know, master's degrees and PhDs and become like top engineers and one has worked for NASA and they're doctors. And so my mom is like, you know, we don't have a dentist or a lawyer in the family yet. Yeah, I was like, okay, yeah.

• 33:40Conan O'Brien?

  And also you can understand where they're coming from.

• 33:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 33:43Conan O'Brien?

  That if you, if they're coming from that reality and then you just one generation removed is saying, I'm gonna try improv. And I'm gonna throw, uh, and I'm gonna play, you know, some, uh, um, some theater games. I could understand why they'd be freaked out.

• 34:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, especially because she's like, wait, you want to do what? Like, she did tell me a long time ago, she goes, you want to be actor, you go, only one man can do it, Tom Cruise, you're not Tom Cruise. I was like, what? I go, mom, there's a lot of people.

• 34:13Conan O'Brien?

  She is true, there is only one man that can do it.

• 34:15Speaker 02

  You're not Tom Cruise. I was like, I'm not. However, he and I do have the same birthday, so, um, but, uh, and so it was, um, I would ask her a lot and she was like, if you go to college and use your degree for one year, like, then I'll, I'll say, okay, you can go. And now I know at this point I'm an adult, but it's an Asian family, so it really mattered that my mom was, you know, there to support me and also I didn't have the money to go do that and, and I needed a lot of support and permission from my mom. And so I, um, graduated, um, from University of Oklahoma with journalism degree and then I worked at the NBC affiliate for one year in Tulsa, Oklahoma. And

• 34:55Conan O'Brien?

  You were sidelined?

• 34:56Speaker 02

  No, I was doing the assignment desk. You've been into a newsroom before? So there's the, we go into a newsroom. There's this assignment desk and it's where you answer the calls from people going like, I love what, you know, Jane was wearing today on the, what color was that suit? And it's also people going like, um, there was a, you know, um, I've got a complaint about, you know, X, Y, Z and what's happening over here on this street. There's also all of these, uh, police scanners, paramedic scanners, fire department scanners. And it's constantly all the time and your job is to hear it all and then to tell people and to be like, Conan, go to 89th Street. There's like, you know,

• 35:29Conan O'Brien?

  There's a fire at McCready's Bond. Get over there.

• 35:31Speaker 02

  Exactly. And they're right there in front of me and I hear nothing. And I could hear producers screaming out what he like, you know, they're like, a school bus turned over on 29th. You're like, I'm like, really? And they're like, oh my gosh, there's a house fire on, on Robertson. I'm like, there is? And I'm like, I'm the worst person at this job ever. I, it was,

• 35:49Conan O'Brien?

  Your job is not to go, you don't say. Wow, there must be some fire.

• 35:55Speaker 02

  I'd be literally,

• 35:55Conan O'Brien?

  We should put it on the news.

• 35:57Speaker 02

  I'd be watching people get up and run and I'm like, what? They're like, and they'd be like, they'd be into the parking lot screaming what's happening and I, I just couldn't hear it. And so I took that job for a year and then, then they asked me, don't ask me why. They're like, do you want to stay on longer? And I was like, well, I told my mom I would only do this for a year before I, I would go. And I was just determined to just do a year. And then I started thinking like, oh man, maybe I, maybe I will. I don't know. I talked to my mom about it. And she goes, you know what? Just why don't you just wait another year, just like one more year? And then you, then you should go out to California and give it a try, but just one more year. So I was like, okay. And then one day, speaking of core memories, like not knowing when you're creating them. My sister was getting dressed and she was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup. And she said, oh, you know, mom said the funniest thing to me the other day.

• 36:43Speaker 02

  She said, you know, Olivia keeps wanting to go to California to be an actor. And I just told her like next year. And if she says anything to you about it, just tell her next year and we'll just keep saying next year, next year, until one day she'll forget about it.

• 36:53Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 36:54Speaker 02

  And my sister said it of just like, mom is so silly. Isn't that so silly? And I, I'm pretty sure my sister doesn't even know this story because it probably didn't even clock to her. But in that moment I was like, oh my God. God, like, well, why is this working? Like, why, why, why? Because it clearly worked on me. I thought, well, I'm letting it work. Why am I letting it work on me? Well, because what if I don't make it? And if I don't make it, then for the rest of my life, I could always say, well, I was gonna be an actor, but my mom wouldn't let me.

• 37:20Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 37:20Speaker 02

  I was gonna.

• 37:20Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:21Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:21Conan O'Brien?

  In a way, you have an out.

• 37:23Speaker 02

  I have an out.

• 37:24Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:24Speaker 02

  Forever. So I, I had a, this, this old, like, beat up Land Rover Discovery that, like, broke down like every 20 miles or so. And it was not a good thing for the environment to do. But we took out the catalytic converter because in Oklahoma, you, you could. And the catalytic converter allows more, to have just more like horsepower. And it like, and it's really bad for the environment because it doesn't, it lets all the exhaust kind of out. But in Oklahoma, you could do it. So.

• 37:50Conan O'Brien?

  Thanks, Oklahoma.

• 37:52Speaker 02

  So the, the, the mechanic was like, you know, you take this out, you're gonna get, like, you're gonna be able to go a lot faster and you're gonna get more.

• 37:58Conan O'Brien?

  Just shoots gasoline out the back, propelling you forward.

• 38:02Speaker 02

  And, um, and so, and then I also had a really, had a crack in my radiator. And I knew about that, but I couldn't afford to.

• 38:09Speaker 03

  You're driving Chernobyl.

• 38:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:12Conan O'Brien?

  Exactly.

• 38:15Speaker 02

  And so. I mean.

• 38:18Conan O'Brien?

  You're low on, you're, you're kind of low on uranium.

• 38:23Speaker 03

  I know.

• 38:23Speaker 02

  I, um, so then I had to drive, like, um, got in my, in the car. I was to go from Oklahoma to Texas and then all the way through, you know, New Mexico, Arizona, and then to California. But like, it stopped like every 200 miles. And, um, because you have to stop, open the gaskets, put in the, the radiator fluid, you know, to the freon to, you know, keep it going. And then, then at one point, it just was like steam was coming out. I was in the middle of, um, New Mexico and the steam was just like spewing out. And it's like the check engine light's coming on. So I pull over and I'm like, oh my gosh. And like, the, the hose for the radiator, like, had blown. It was like a, like a crack in it. I'm like, I just, I'm on the side of the road, on the highway, like, look, you know, like, walking for a while, going through the brush. And then I find a hose.

• 39:07Speaker 02

  I'm looking for something that I could use and I find a hose. And, because I've already had to do these things.

• 39:12Conan O'Brien?

  You found a radiator hose?

• 39:14Speaker 02

  No, no, no, not. A radiator hose.

• 39:15Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 39:16Speaker 02

  No, it was like.

• 39:16Speaker 03

  Still, a hose.

• 39:17Conan O'Brien?

  A hose.

• 39:17Speaker 03

  You found what you're looking for? That's amazing.

• 39:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was, I don't know what kind of hose. It wasn't a water hose, it was something. But I did it because in college, my best friend Kara, she's very, she taught me a lot of this stuff. And, and so this had happened once before, when we were in Oklahoma during college. And I was like, what are we doing? She's like, we're gonna go find a hose. It's like, what do you mean? She's like, we're gonna find something. And like, so we like, on the side of the road, you just keep like, looking and looking and like, you'll find something. And so, you know, I look, it wasn't easy. It wasn't like, I was like, an hour or so just like.

• 39:48Speaker 03

  Treasure hunting?

• 39:50Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I'm just saying, you may have a real talent here.

• 39:52Speaker 02

  Well, you just search and search and you find something. And I, I carried the screwdriver and I carried like, the heat resistant duct tape. I mean, I had the whole thing, cause like, this was a situation that I had experienced for like, over a year. I've been going through this. So, you'd think actually that I would have kept like, extra hoses.

• 40:11Speaker 03

  That's the key.

• 40:12Conan O'Brien?

  No, not if your, not if your experience is, just go outside and look around. It's like shopping at Mineki.

• 40:21Speaker 02

  But we found it and it got me through, it got me to the very, like, all the way to Altadena where I was meeting cousins.

• 40:27Conan O'Brien?

  And so, how long before you got work?

• 40:29Speaker 02

  Well, it depends on what you, how you describe work. So, in an actor's guide, your first year in Hollywood, they.

• 40:35Conan O'Brien?

  You really, yeah.

• 40:36Speaker 02

  They tell you.

• 40:37Conan O'Brien?

  After the chapter on finding a hose.

• 40:44Conan O'Brien?

  This book is really good.

• 40:49Speaker 02

  You know how like, they, they up, they do like, a new, a new edition? Maybe they should do a new edition interviewing me.

• 40:54Conan O'Brien?

  The new edition, yeah.

• 40:56Speaker 02

  So, I, it says like, to become an actor, you need to join the, the union. And how do you join the union? You get your SAG card. How do you get your SAG card? Or will you book something that gives you your SAG card? Or you go and be an extra? And you can be an extra and you get like, pink slips. I think it was like, three pink slips equals like, one SAG card.

• 41:13Speaker 03

  That's what I did.

• 41:13Speaker 02

  You did? Did you get it?

• 41:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, for being an extra, yeah.

• 41:16Speaker 02

  Wait, how many, how many pink slips did you get?

• 41:17Speaker 03

  Three.

• 41:18Speaker 02

  And did you get, did you get speaking parts?

• 41:20Speaker 03

  No, I was just a-

• 41:21Speaker 02

  Did you get featured?

• 41:23Speaker 03

  No, I was a high school student, even though I looked 38. And-

• 41:27Conan O'Brien?

  It said in the, I saw what's the credits, it said creepy high school student. Prematurely aged student.

• 41:32Speaker 02

  Did everyone get one, or did they just give it to you?

• 41:34Speaker 03

  There was, it was called, a show called The Smart Guy on like, was it Nickelodeon or something? I can't remember. And one of the actors was someone we knew from an improv group, and so he got three of us as featured extras to get our SAG cards.

• 41:45Speaker 02

  What was the, what was the featured part?

• 41:47Speaker 03

  Creepy guy in a high school. Like, we weren't, we weren't like, speaking. It was some kind of, it seemed like a game or something.

• 41:53Conan O'Brien?

  So it's thoroughly background work.

• 41:55Speaker 03

  It totally was.

• 41:55Speaker 02

  It is background work.

• 41:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 41:56Speaker 02

  And, but, I, I thought you just go. And, then you're like, every background person gets like a, I didn't know there was like a, a special thing. Like, you have to be like, you have to have a featured, whatever that means.

• 42:07Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 42:08Speaker 02

  But, so in the book, it says, like, go to central casting. And you bring your passport and another identification, and you go there and you line up. So I go to central casting out in Burbank. And, like, there is a line that goes, you know, down the block, down the block, around the block. And I'm there, like, passport in hand, the biggest smile on my face. I'm like, we're doing it.

• 42:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 42:26Speaker 02

  We're, we're, we're gonna do it. We're here. Look at us.

• 42:29Conan O'Brien?

  I'm the new Tom Cruise.

• 42:31Speaker 04

  Just like the book says.

• 42:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, you guys have the book too?

• 42:34Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 42:34Speaker 02

  Um, and, um, and I was like, literally the only person smiling the entire time. I was like, this is it. And I get to the front, and the first one I did was Gilmore Girls. And I couldn't believe it. I got cast on Gilmore Girls. And I get to Warner Brothers, I see all these people there, and no one else is smiling, it's 4 a.m. And I'm just like, guys, we're doing it. Here we are. Look at us. We made it. And then this one guy brought me over and he's like, come here. He's like, is this your first time doing this? I'm like, yes, yes, it is. He's like, okay. He's like, what, um, what color did you bring? I was like, what do you mean, what color? And he was like, what color did you bring? I said, I don't, I just have like, winter coats and stuff. He goes, hold on. He, he hands me his red, his red scarf. And, he's like, you need this so that they can see you in the background. He's like, and he puts on a red hat. And he goes, and you wanna make like, big gestures.

• 43:18Speaker 02

  He's like, you know, like, you can say hi to a friend that's way over there, and like-

• 43:21Speaker 03

  Oh my god.

• 43:22Speaker 02

  So he had all these like, tips and tricks, and taught me about like, bringing Tupperware so that I can like, take food home, and like, how we wanna get into meal penalties, and it was like, this whole thing I learnt, yeah.

• 43:31Speaker 03

  The Yoda of background acting on your first day.

• 43:33Conan O'Brien?

  Some of the advice, I'm not sure, I, I have a hard time watching Gilmore Girls, cause there's a guy in the background who's always flailing like he's on fire.

• 43:41Speaker 02

  Wearing a red, bright clothes.

• 43:43Conan O'Brien?

  He's dressed like, where's Waldo? I can't understand Rory.

• 43:48Speaker 02

  But I only did it, I only did one other background job. The very first thing I booked was this, it's always sunny in Philadelphia.

• 43:56Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, there you go.

• 43:57Speaker 01

  It's my jam.

• 43:58Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 43:59Speaker 02

  Oh, wait a second.

• 44:01Speaker 02

  So, I couldn't believe it. I was, this is so exciting. Then Monday morning rolls around and I'm waiting. I know it's supposed to be filmed on Monday and I'm waiting, I'm waiting, I'm waiting. And then I, I try to get ahold of somebody at the agency. No one's answering. Try to get somebody at the management company. No one's answering. Cause it's super early in the morning. I'm like, I feel like I'm supposed to be there already. And then finally I get a call from production. And the woman's like, oh my God, we transpose the last two numbers of your cellphone. My number at the time was 0608. So they were calling 0806. And they're like, I'm so sorry. We had to go audition all of the extras for this role. And I was like, what do you mean? They're like, we told your managers. But my manager at the time was too busy starring and filming his own movie.

• 44:42Speaker 01

  Oh God.

• 44:43Speaker 02

  That weekend.

• 44:44Speaker 01

  Oh, come on, bro.

• 44:45Speaker 02

  He didn't give me any of the, any of the, yeah.

• 44:48Speaker 01

  Bro. Oh my God.

• 44:51Conan O'Brien?

  I would give him just a number of more chances if I were you.

• 44:54Speaker 03

  It's not too late.

• 44:54Conan O'Brien?

  I'd give him 15 more chances.

• 44:56Speaker 02

  Yeah. I was like, I was like, I, you guys, I was like, I'll be right there. I'll be right there. Like, I'm sorry, we've had to move. Like, but don't worry, we'll remember you for the next time. I thought, of course you're not going to.

• 45:06Conan O'Brien?

  I look back at my start and there were things I desperately wanted to happen. It didn't happen. And then later on, I realized that if those things had happened, the real great shots wouldn't have come along for me. It would have set me off on a different road. So, because you go on this streak of Attack of the Show. You get.

• 45:25Speaker 02

  Daily Show.

• 45:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, Daily Show. You got offered a part on 30 Rock.

• 45:30Speaker 02

  Oh, that one, yeah.

• 45:30Conan O'Brien?

  Which you couldn't end up doing. And then you do The Newsroom.

• 45:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, I, that was like my first big, like a behemoth to take on, right? Like The Daily Show with Jon Stewart was a, those both are like kind of simultaneous. Like, and they're very different in their own ways.

• 45:46Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 45:47Speaker 02

  I knew that I was like, just the outlier in that whole cast of The Newsroom. And that, you know, and actually after my first day of. Filming the very first scene that you see me in in season, in episode two, season one. He came to me afterwards. He's like, you know, we were, he's like, just so you know, we were all watching being like, what's this girl from The Daily Show gonna do? And I was like, and I kind of felt that pressure a little bit, but also at the same time felt like, like, I didn't know a lot about, like, the etiquette of, like, filming on, on sets and like, how, like, I would ask a lot of questions. I would go to Sorkin and be like, can you explain all these little things to me? Because I was like, I mean, I didn't write the character. You did. So I would, and so there is like, and I would ask other actors to be like, how would you say this line? And they'd be like, what?

• 46:27Speaker 02

  Like, you can't. And I was like, why would I just want to use my brain if I give everyone's, you know, help and involved in this? And I was looking at, I knew I was going, I had like such an amazing, high caliber group of actors around me. And I was like, oh, man, I don't, I just have to like, kind of narrow in and think about what I'm doing. And I, I, at that time, in entertainment, I feel like a lot of times I'd seen characters like that play really, just overly demanding or apologetic. And I just wanted to play it straight. I just was like, there's, like, just, and there's, nothing has come close to that. I stopped filming that show in two thousand, seventeen, fourteen, seventeen, fourteen, something like that. It's a long time ago. And I, nothing has come close to that because of the challenges

• 47:10Speaker 02

  that Sorkin put for me in there to like, really make things really small, but still give it as much impact.

• 47:17Conan O'Brien?

  It'd be very hard to act in his stuff because he puts so much dialogue in there.

• 47:22Speaker 02

  So dense.

• 47:22Conan O'Brien?

  It's so dense. And I'm, when I watch his stuff, I'm always very, he's obviously a great writer and he's really a savant at, at this. He does great work. But I'm always thinking, yeah, I, I couldn't work for that guy.

• 47:33Speaker 02

  Memorize all that stuff?

• 47:35Conan O'Brien?

  And, and you know me, I'd just be making up gibberish. And he also loves walking and talking. So that business where, you know,

• 47:42Speaker 03

  And you literally can't walk and talk.

• 47:44Conan O'Brien?

  I can't walk. I cannot walk. And I cannot.

• 47:47Speaker 02

  Unless you're being carried on a toilet.

• 47:49Conan O'Brien?

  If I'm carried on a toilet.

• 47:50Speaker 03

  That's why.

• 47:51Conan O'Brien?

  All my scenes.

• 47:54Conan O'Brien?

  But you've, I mean, it's interesting because you, you've had kids. I know that you then battled breast cancer and you made this decision to just take time off. But I heard you say somewhere, I'm not going to do some announcement that you won't be seeing me for a while.

• 48:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:11Conan O'Brien?

  Which I thought was cool because when people announce, I'll be stepping down from my career.

• 48:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:16Conan O'Brien?

  Momentarily, I always think, no one asked.

• 48:18Speaker 02

  Yeah. I'm like, I always think it's so funny when people do that. I'm like, you don't play for the Lakers. Like, no one's being like, where are they? Tuesday night, where are they?

• 48:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 48:25Speaker 02

  I'm like, you're an actor. Like, everyone wants to make this big announcement. And it's like, I think if there's somewhere where people are expecting you to be.

• 48:32Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 48:32Speaker 02

  You know, then, okay, you should let us know. You're not going to be there.

• 48:35Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 48:36Speaker 02

  It was like, it was a, it was a personal decision. And yeah, I just felt like I just had gone through, I don't know if your wife dealt with postpartum, but I had the worst postpartum anxiety. Did you have that at all? Yeah, I did. Yeah. I was ready for postpartum depression. I'd heard about it. I'd never heard of postpartum anxiety. And so it was like about a month after Malcolm was born and all of a sudden I just like, I wake up at 4:00 a.m. My eyes just pop open and I just go, and I just feel it in my chest every day. And it's like that every day for almost a year. And I, I just, I, I would just have to hold his arm going from room to room sometimes. And that would just be like, cool, the rest, like, sometimes it'd be cool, but it would always be there. And I didn't understand what it was. I didn't really say anything to anybody about it.

• 49:21Speaker 02

  I just told him, like, I don't really feel good. I'm just kind of feeling anxious. And it wasn't until, it wasn't for like nine months or something until finally I like opened up to, I think, my therapist about it. And I, I wasn't able to make a lot of breast milk. I really tried and my son was struggling because I was not giving him any, any, any nourishment. And it was so. Frustrating. And so I was like, I'm just stopping. I'm gonna put him on formula. He's gonna be okay. But by stopping cold turkey like that, I didn't know, even if I made a little bit, what happens is your hormones drop. And everything, like I had, I was not prepared for this. So then it just, it just dropped me into like the depths of postpartum hell.

• 50:02Speaker 02

  And I was spiraling and then I ended up getting, um, people had asked me like, what, what were your thoughts? Well, the thing is, I didn't have thoughts. Thank God I didn't have any thoughts of self harm or hurting anyone else. Um, and I have, my heart goes out to every woman who's experiencing that. And there is not enough sympathy and empathy and understanding for that. It's absolutely, um, horrifying to, to feel those things, I can imagine. Yeah. So that was a big part of the reason why I was like, okay, I need to take some time away, but I wasn't thinking about that yet. Right when I was getting out of that postpartum haze, I was like, I'm feeling good. Then I get diagnosed with breast cancer.

• 50:34Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 50:35Speaker 02

  And then it was like, it was a, a very aggressive, fast moving cancer that was like all over both breasts. So I went through many surgeries, five surgeries. And then in that process, I was like, I think I need to step away from being in the public eye.

• 50:49Conan O'Brien?

  Wow. And it's also just important to point out, you had no symptoms. And so you took this lifetime risk assessment test.

• 50:56Speaker 02

  Right.

• 50:56Conan O'Brien?

  Which told you you had a very high number and that saved your life. I mean, that's huge.

• 51:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, the, had a clear mammogram and a clear ultrasound and I did clear genetic testing as well, or genetic testing, it came back clear. Um, a lot of people ask about BRCA and BRCA is, um, is a very well-known breast cancer gene, but there are many breast cancer genes. And, um, I tested negative for all cancer genes. Yeah. So, um, there, there's a thing.

• 51:22Conan O'Brien?

  I know.

• 51:22Speaker 02

  Yeah. The lifetime risk assessment test and it's a free online test. It takes minutes to take. It's been around for a very long time, but a lot of people don't know about it. Anything above 20% is, is considered high risk and it's a score that will tell you how likely you are to get breast cancer in your lifetime. And mine was 37.3%.

• 51:39Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, man. Okay.

• 51:40Speaker 02

  So I went to go get the MRI and the doctor called me that day and he's like, I think I, I see something on, um, on your right breast. You should, you should go get a, an ultrasound. So, okay, I go get the ultrasound and then doctor's taking, you know, some time and it's never really good. They're quiet, right? So I'm like, is everything okay? And she's like, well, I see the one from the MRI, but now I'm finding two more.

• 51:58Speaker 01

  Oh, fuck.

• 51:59Speaker 02

  Okay. And then she explains it to me. So with women, our breasts are like circles and then they put a cross through it. And then there's quadrants. And so multifocal means there's more than one in one quadrant. Multi quadrant is that there's two different quadrants. It's not, it's not that abnormal to have multifocal in one quadrant, but it's abnormal to have it in two quadrants, multiple quadrants. So they're like, okay, you should go get a biopsy. So I go get a biopsy and they're like, yeah, it's a very aggressive, fast-moving cancer and it's not normal to have multifocal, multi-quadrant at your age. And then they're like, well, let's go back to your original MRI and look at the other side. And they looked at the left breast. They go, okay, yes, we got to go an MRI biopsy on this. And they did that one as well.

• 52:39Speaker 02

  And so they're like, so then I was diagnosed with multifocal, multi-quadrant bilateral breast cancer. And then after my double mastectomy, they sent it off for pathology and they find a tangerine size section of more breast cancer in my right breast. Cause you know, they look for, it's called clearing the margins. So when they get your tumors, they take the tissue out and you want to make, they want to come back and be like, okay, we, we were able to clear margins. So whatever tissue sample we got, we were able to say we got the tumor because there is clear, there's clear tissue all around it. And because they did my whole double mastectomy, they were able to take all the tissue out, but they were like, okay, we weren't able to get clear margins till past like a tangerine size section of more.

• 53:19Speaker 02

  So, and that was, and I would never have, I would not have found it until it was a much later stage if I didn't take the lifetime risk assessment test.

• 53:28Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ.

• 53:29Speaker 02

  And then a year after that, a little less than a year after that, I would have my mom do a mammogram. My mom just turned 70. I had her, this was last year, yeah. I had her do a mammogram and ultrasound, it's clear, clear. And I did her lifetime risk assessment score. And she scored in the high risk. And so then we had her do an MRI and she has, she was diagnosed with her two breast cancer. It's a type of breast cancer that can double in size every six weeks.

• 53:57Speaker 01

  What?

• 53:58Speaker 02

  So when she, when she got, when we found it, a few weeks later, she has her double mastectomy and it'd already become multifocal.

• 54:05Speaker 01

  Ah.

• 54:05Speaker 02

  Because it was.

• 54:06Speaker 01

  I gotta do this to this.

• 54:07Speaker 02

  You do.

• 54:07Conan O'Brien?

  No, you do.

• 54:08Speaker 02

  It's a really. I'm actually working with Senator Mark Kelly on legislation that will help make it a lot easier for women to have this done, just because the onus shouldn't be on us to always know about these things. And I can, I'll, I will, you know, this is a, one of the biggest missions in my life, besides being, you know, a, a mother and, and a wife and a daughter. I want to help as many women as I can with this. It's so simple. But it shouldn't be on us to know about it.

• 54:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 54:36Speaker 02

  When we go into our doctors, they take our blood pressure, they ask about like our cholesterol, and they should also say, what's your lifetime risk assessment score? And so we're working with, I'm working with Senator Kelly on figuring out a way to get every doctor in our country to make that part of their standard of care.

• 54:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:54Conan O'Brien?

  All right. Lifetime risk assessment test. That is huge.

• 55:00Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. I better write it down for you.

• 55:03Speaker 02

  Well, if there's a specific one, the Tyra Cusick one, I, I have it in my link in bio and my Instagram.

• 55:07Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 55:08Speaker 02

  Because there's, there's one called the Gail something other, that is the Tyra Cusick one. They're all a little bit different for some reason, but.

• 55:13Speaker 03

  We can put it in the show notes.

• 55:14Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, put it in the show notes. Well, now you're working on your friends and neighbors with Mr. Jon Hamm, and I bet it's nice to be, you know, and it must be nice to be back in it, I would think. Kind of therapeutic to be working and.

• 55:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:30Conan O'Brien?

  Making that great show. I really do love that show.

• 55:32Speaker 02

  Thanks. I'm so happy you like it.

• 55:34Conan O'Brien?

  Um, and we gotta do this again sometime.

• 55:37Speaker 02

  Yeah. Oh, my gosh, I just settled in. What else are we gonna talk about?

• 55:42Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I, uh.

• 55:42Speaker 03

  Finding hoses?

• 55:45Speaker 02

  I hope my friend, my friend Cara, I'm gonna make her listen to this. She was the one who taught me that. She's, she's, she's an architect. Do you know California Chicken Cafe out here?

• 55:53Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 55:53Speaker 02

  She's like the, the VP of branding there, and she's the one who redesigned all of the California Chicken Cafes out here. They're like all the.

• 56:00Conan O'Brien?

  I've noticed they've got a new look.

• 56:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, they do.

• 56:03Conan O'Brien?

  They have new font and everything.

• 56:04Speaker 02

  There's one on.

• 56:04Conan O'Brien?

  That makes me like the chicken more. It's all about a presentation. If a chicken, sometimes there's a really good chicken with bad font, and I'm like, I'm not into this shit.

• 56:13Speaker 02

  You're a big font guy.

• 56:14Conan O'Brien?

  I'm very big on the font.

• 56:16Speaker 02

  What I learned is they did better during COVID than a lot of places, because everybody's looking for like just a healthy, easy alternative. So much so. That they don't do Eden anymore.

• 56:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:26Speaker 02

  It's literally just pick up. You know a lot about this place.

• 56:28Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, no, no, she's.

• 56:29Speaker 01

  I sure do.

• 56:30Conan O'Brien?

  She knows her, uh, fast foods and your food outlets, right? Isn't that fair to say?

• 56:34Speaker 01

  It's not, it's not really fa- it's not like Carl's Jr.

• 56:38Conan O'Brien?

  No, no.

• 56:38Speaker 01

  Burger King.

• 56:39Conan O'Brien?

  You're just lifting off a whole other places, yeah.

• 56:41Speaker 01

  It's, it's, it is, it's like that, it's good. And I like, you don't have to walk in, they have like a window now and you just go order and pick up.

• 56:48Speaker 03

  Is there one out by us?

• 56:49Speaker 01

  There's, mm, I don't think so. I, if I, if I go to one, it's the one on Melrose.

• 56:54Speaker 03

  What are we doing? Excuse me, we're talking here. Let us talk.

• 56:56Conan O'Brien?

  Can I just say the best one of all is Pollo Loco because that for what?

• 57:00Speaker 01

  It's El Pollo Loco.

• 57:01Conan O'Brien?

  Please.

• 57:01Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 57:02Conan O'Brien?

  I like La Pollo Loca, myself. I like to feminize things because women need to be heard and seen. But also, I like a chicken that's gone insane. I like a chicken that's eyes are crossed and it's gone insane and, and then the chicken is telling you, eat chicken. But the chicken's gone insane and it's this crazy thing where you're like, a chicken's gone so insane, he's telling people to eat more of my kind.

• 57:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, game recognizes game with you, you know, or game recognizes foul.

• 57:32Conan O'Brien?

  Um, all right, well, my best to, uh, to Kooky John, you know? I mean, uh.

• 57:39Speaker 02

  He loves you.

• 57:40Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I love him. Listen, uh, be well, I'm so glad that you're healthy, I'm glad that you have these two beautiful children. Um, and that you have this great family, I'm just pretty happy for you.

• 57:52Speaker 02

  Oh, thank you so much, I mean, it really means a lot, I mean, um, just so happy to be here with you guys, I mean, we love your show, everybody loves your show. And, um.

• 58:01Conan O'Brien?

  They have to, it's the law.

• 58:02Speaker 02

  But it's been so nice, I don't want to leave now.

• 58:05Conan O'Brien?

  Well, you can stay, this is a nice place to hang.

• 58:07Speaker 02

  What do you guys do next?

• 58:08Speaker 03

  Just go out for a tasty freeze?

• 58:12Speaker 01

  I'm a little California chicken cat, CCC is what the kids call it. Yeah, that's what I call it.

• 58:17Speaker 02

  Do you guys interview somebody else after this, or do you have one a day?

• 58:20Speaker 03

  No.

• 58:20Speaker 01

  We tend to record more.

• 58:21Speaker 02

  Stuff, but.

• 58:22Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I don't know if we're doing more. Yeah, I always, we're next week, we're doing, we do segments separately and all that. I think that's it for today. You know, sometimes we just do local news and weather.

• 58:34Speaker 02

  How many episodes do we do a year?

• 58:36Speaker 03

  Well, this is interesting. You're gonna be the 400th episode.

• 58:38Speaker 02

  Yay!

• 58:39Speaker 01

  Me?

• 58:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, which means you get a pair.

• 58:42Speaker 02

  That feels like someone, someone did not plan that, right? I feel like it should have been.

• 58:46Conan O'Brien?

  No, it doesn't. No, please. It's like, but you got a pair of socks.

• 58:50Speaker 02

  That's exciting.

• 58:51Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, Olivia, I want to thank you.

• 58:53Speaker 02

  Sorry, hold on.

• 58:54Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, adjust your clothing and here we go. Olivia, thank you very much for being, oh, hi.

• 59:02Speaker 02

  Start again.

• 59:03Conan O'Brien?

  Olivia.

• 59:04Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 59:05Conan O'Brien?

  I just want to tell you that it was lovely having you here on Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. I do consider you a friend and I wish you all the best in your future endeavors. And now I say both to you and to people all around America and in the heartland listening, thank you and good night.

• 59:28Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 59:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, I love awards.

• 59:31Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 59:45Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 59:46Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 59:54Speaker 02

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 59:59Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5N, which I love. Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 1:00:18Speaker 02

  Hello!

• 1:00:19Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space with available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View U.S. News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details. Did you know that 1 in 4 Americans targeted by scams end up falling for them?

• 1:00:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:58Conan O'Brien?

  You fell for one.

• 1:00:58Speaker 01

  I fell for a scam.

• 1:01:00Conan O'Brien?

  Now, you didn't lose too much money, but you did lose.

• 1:01:02Speaker 01

  I did lose, and it was very inconvenient, and now they put protections on my account like I'm, uh, dumb.

• 1:01:08Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. I don't know where they got that impression. Criminals are now using AI to make scams look more realistic than ever. In 2025, AI fraud spiked 1,210% and cost Americans $893 million. That's incredible. Well, with AI, it can get so smart now.

• 1:01:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:01:29Conan O'Brien?

  Do you know what I mean?

• 1:01:29Speaker 01

  Maybe I should start scamming.

• 1:01:31Conan O'Brien?

  No, that's not the point.

• 1:01:32Speaker 01

  Oh, no, that's not the point of this.

• 1:01:33Conan O'Brien?

  That's not the point.

• 1:01:34Speaker 01

  It's so much money.

• 1:01:34Conan O'Brien?

  One accidental click, Son, it can expose your information, putting you at risk of identity theft. Luckily, this is the point. Not that you should start scamming, but that everyone should get LifeLock.

• 1:01:44Speaker 01

  Right, right, right, right.

• 1:01:45Conan O'Brien?

  LifeLock has live, U.S.-based restoration specialists who will be with you every step of the way to fix your identity theft, from first alert to full restoration. This is fantastic. How do you not have this?

• 1:01:56Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:01:57Conan O'Brien?

  If you have expenses or money stolen due to identity theft, you're backed by the million-dollar protection package with up to $3 million coverage in some plans. Join now and save up to 30% off your first year. Go to lifelock.com/conan. That's lifelock.com/conan to save 30%. Terms apply.

• 1:02:16Conan O'Brien?

  This fall, I want to try something different.

• 1:02:17Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:02:18Conan O'Brien?

  I like to change it up. I like to learn things. So I'm going to try and make apple cider.

• 1:02:22Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:02:22Conan O'Brien?

  Every morning.

• 1:02:23Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:02:23Conan O'Brien?

  This fall, just to see if I can do it.

• 1:02:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, fall's the perfect season to try something new, like joining T-Mobile.

• 1:02:30Speaker 01

  Oh, that's good.

• 1:02:31Conan O'Brien?

  See what I did?

• 1:02:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:32Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, there are 250 reasons to join T-Mobile right now. You want to hear what they are?

• 1:02:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:36Conan O'Brien?

  They're America's best network.

• 1:02:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:02:37Conan O'Brien?

  True story. Plus, T-Mobile has got off-grid satellite coverage. That comes in really handy. I like to just wander in the woods sometimes.

• 1:02:45Speaker 01

  Oh, that's weird.

• 1:02:45Conan O'Brien?

  When I'm thinking about, like, making apple cider.

• 1:02:47Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:02:47Conan O'Brien?

  And that's when it comes in handy. Here's another reason. High-speed data in over 215 countries and destinations. I travel a lot for the

• 1:02:54Speaker 01

  You travel a lot.

• 1:02:55Conan O'Brien?

  travel show that I do.

• 1:02:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:56Conan O'Brien?

  Stream this podcast while ignoring local landmarks. That's always fun to do. Like, oh, look, there's the Mona Lisa. Yeah, check it out. I'm in the Louvre. I should, but I'm listening to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend.

• 1:03:07Speaker 01

  That doesn't seem like a good idea.

• 1:03:08Conan O'Brien?

  It's a great idea.

• 1:03:09Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:03:10Conan O'Brien?

  You know, you can see art anytime. But how often can you listen to this podcast?

• 1:03:15Speaker 01

  My god.

• 1:03:16Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:16Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:03:17Conan O'Brien?

  No, all these reasons make T-Mobile a great choice.

• 1:03:19Speaker 01

  I agree.

• 1:03:20Conan O'Brien?

  T-Mobile is stacking up reasons to join. Go to tmobile.com and find yours best, based on analysis by UCLA of Speed Test Intelligence data first half of 2026. Can't believe I read that. T-satellite with capable devices in most outdoor areas in the US where you can see the sky. High-speed international data with qualifying plan. Visit tmobile.com. Consult a physician. I just threw that in there.

• 1:03:44Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:03:50Speaker 05

  All right, now it is time for a segment we call Review the Reviewers, where we read and respond to real five-star reviews.

• 1:03:56Conan O'Brien?

  Are you reading a bedtime story to a child?

• 1:03:58Speaker 05

  I'm trying to be professional.

• 1:04:01Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, all right.

• 1:04:02Speaker 05

  I'm getting sleepy. Can I have cocoa? What do you want me to do? Go to Apple Podcasts and rate us five stars and you might be featured on a future episode. Today's review comes from Kira8Kira who says, "Segment idea."

• 1:04:14Speaker 02

  Hey.

• 1:04:15Speaker 05

  We're doing a segment. Conan and team, I'm a huge fan, love listening to your podcast, and it is one of the things that got me through chemo, so thank you for that.

• 1:04:22Conan O'Brien?

  Wow, that's good for her.

• 1:04:24Speaker 05

  You guys should do a segment where you guys discuss new words that kids use these days.

• 1:04:29Conan O'Brien?

  Oh wow, that's a good one. Hey, Kira8Kira, I'm so glad that you got through chemo and love the suggestion. It's the new, what the words that kids are using these days?

• 1:04:39Speaker 05

  Words that kids are using these days, do you know?

• 1:04:41Conan O'Brien?

  Sure, there's riz. I've been told I've got riz by no one.

• 1:04:45Speaker 05

  I was gonna say, I'd name one person.

• 1:04:47Conan O'Brien?

  No one, apparently I am riz-free, but it's a good word.

• 1:04:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:04:52Conan O'Brien?

  It's good slang. Do you know what the slang is these days?

• 1:04:55Speaker 02

  Uh, I know cap, no cap, and I know-

• 1:04:57Conan O'Brien?

  What's cap, no cap?

• 1:04:59Speaker 02

  Cap is, uh, you're telling the truth. No cap is you're telling the truth. Cap is when you are, uh, not telling the truth.

• 1:05:07Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 1:05:08Speaker 02

  That's right, yeah, because it's all about hiding behind a cap. Someone explained it to me.

• 1:05:12Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, so, so, so use it in a sentence.

• 1:05:15Speaker 02

  Uh.

• 1:05:16Conan O'Brien?

  Hey dude, you're, you got, you got a cap on right now?

• 1:05:19Speaker 05

  Oh.

• 1:05:20Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:05:21Conan O'Brien?

  Well, no, I'm trying to use it in a sentence.

• 1:05:22Speaker 02

  That is so off. I know, but I just told you, no, hey Conan, uh, no cap. Uh, you did great at the Oscars.

• 1:05:30Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, thanks a lot.

• 1:05:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:05:31Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, okay. Um, I don't like that. I, I- I just think it's, these new phrases should be easier to say.

• 1:05:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:05:42Conan O'Brien?

  Do you know what I mean? That's why like, the guy's got riz makes sense to me because you're saying a lot in a very short little word.

• 1:05:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:05:50Conan O'Brien?

  Um, that's why, uh, I think it's useful. No cap, cap, just feels like it's, you're complicating something that's, you know.

• 1:05:59Speaker 02

  Well, it's not meant for you. Um, and then I think there's the one about, any, don't they add maxing now to everything?

• 1:06:05Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, there's all like frame, frame-mogging, gesture-maxing. Oh, well, that's because of, um, the social media, uh, star, um, who, who's, who looks maxing, who, which he, uh, helped invest. And I thought of a joke the other day. I ran over a controversial, um, social media, uh, person with my truck. Yeah, I was charged with clavicular homicide.

• 1:06:28Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:06:33Conan O'Brien?

  Look, I'm getting mad respect. I wrote that joke the other day. Because um, I saw him being a douche somewhere and I just was like, okay, that's a-

• 1:06:42Speaker 02

  Sona has her head down like she's gonna puke. I don't know what to, can you?

• 1:06:46Conan O'Brien?

  No, I did a bit on the Oscars that was all about me trying to appeal to young people.

• 1:06:52Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:06:52Conan O'Brien?

  But the whole joke was that's impossible if you're doing it on, you're doing it on broadcast television. And that was the joke. But I, someone sent me a clip of clavicular watching it and saying, dude, that's wasting his time trying to be cool on network TV. And I thought, no, that's the joke, clavicular. But then I realized I'm engaging in an argument with clavicular.

• 1:07:17Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:07:17Conan O'Brien?

  And that's when I thought, I should use this time for good and write a joke about clavicular where he gets hit by a truck. And then I came up with it. We, sorry, you're charged with clavicular homicide. Come on, high fives all around.

• 1:07:32Speaker 02

  No high fives. You say so much nonsensical words, I feel like you could come up with a slang term.

• 1:07:38Conan O'Brien?

  I'd come up with something a lot better than cap, no cap, that's for sure.

• 1:07:41Speaker 02

  Okay, let's say, hey, are you serious? Say something that's like, hey, this is serious.

• 1:07:45Conan O'Brien?

  I'm Sears, S R Z.

• 1:07:47Speaker 02

  Sears? No, that's a department store for people who still remember it.

• 1:07:51Conan O'Brien?

  No, it's long gone. Sears is so long gone, we can change it and it's just S R Z.

• 1:07:56Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:07:56Conan O'Brien?

  Hey Sears, what are you gonna do?

• 1:07:57Speaker 02

  Can you say, I'm Sears, like it's 1998.

• 1:08:00Conan O'Brien?

  What's that?

• 1:08:01Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 1:08:02Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, you're, I think I'm better at this than you are, and I think you're drifting away. What do you think? You must, you're the closest to this age.

• 1:08:09Speaker 05

  I was gonna say, Adam's probably the expert, cause his kids are like the perfect age to-

• 1:08:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:13Speaker 04

  I do hear cap, no cap.

• 1:08:15Conan O'Brien?

  Tell them it's not good and to switch to Sears, S R Z.

• 1:08:18Speaker 04

  Low key, people say all the time. And you actually in your Oscars thing said, which was really funny, and we say it at home now, low can you andly or something like that.

• 1:08:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, low can you andly, yeah.

• 1:08:26Speaker 04

  Which I think you made up, but it's like, a play on low key. And they say low key a lot.

• 1:08:30Conan O'Brien?

  I just said what Skyler Higley told me to say. That was one where it was like teaching a dog how to speak by putting peanut butter on its lips.

• 1:08:38Conan O'Brien?

  Skyler said, say these words and it will be funny, and I went, okay, Skyler.

• 1:08:42Speaker 02

  So Sears.

• 1:08:43Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, so Sears. Hey Sears, I thought that was a good bit.

• 1:08:47Speaker 05

  Give us another one.

• 1:08:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:49Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, no, no, but what's the- You don't know?

• 1:08:52Speaker 05

  I feel like I don't know.

• 1:08:54Conan O'Brien?

  No, no.

• 1:08:55Speaker 05

  Oh, Blake has one.

• 1:08:56Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:56Speaker 06

  Oh, a lot of times people will talk to chat, like, yeah, chat, that's, you know, because when you're live streaming, you're looking at a chat that people are talking about, but people are bringing it IRL into, into real life and, and saying, oh, yeah, chat, let's go out to dinner at, you know, Chipotle or whatever.

• 1:09:11Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I don't, but, but, okay. They're referencing that, yes, a chat can, can be happening while you're having a conversation online.

• 1:09:18Speaker 06

  They'll say chat instead of guys, like, hey, guys, let's go do this.

• 1:09:20Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, that's, okay, that's bad.

• 1:09:21Speaker 05

  Or there's like the silent scream, I feel like Gen Z does, have you seen that, where they'll go like?

• 1:09:25Conan O'Brien?

  Oh.

• 1:09:27Speaker 02

  I've never seen that before.

• 1:09:28Speaker 06

  They'll also say bet?

• 1:09:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, bet. Bet I've heard a lot.

• 1:09:31Speaker 06

  Bet is really big.

• 1:09:32Conan O'Brien?

  You know what I want to do? I want to grow even older in ignorance.

• 1:09:37Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:09:37Conan O'Brien?

  That's my dream, is just to drift away on the ice.

• 1:09:40Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 1:09:40Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, and just not know about no cap, chip chop, flip flop, squabble doo.

• 1:09:45Speaker 02

  I love it.

• 1:09:46Conan O'Brien?

  You do?

• 1:09:47Speaker 02

  Do you, did you not use slang terms when you were younger?

• 1:09:50Conan O'Brien?

  I think I used slang terms from the 40s when I was growing up in the 70s.

• 1:09:54Speaker 02

  Oh, you must have been so cool.

• 1:09:57Conan O'Brien?

  I was like, hey, 23 skidoo, you know? I was always trapped in the 1930s and 40s in the late 1970s.

• 1:10:05Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 1:10:05Conan O'Brien?

  You know?

• 1:10:06Speaker 02

  You have a hostility.

• 1:10:07Conan O'Brien?

  So, um, yeah, I was a weird, weird kid and no one should do as I did. All right, I think we learned a lot and also in a way, we learned nothing.

• 1:10:13Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:10:14Conan O'Brien?

  And maybe we now know less than we did before, than we've accomplished our mission.

• 1:10:18Speaker 05

  Beautiful.

• 1:10:19Speaker 02

  Sears.

• 1:10:20Speaker 05

  Sears.

• 1:10:20Conan O'Brien?

  Sears.

• 1:10:43Speaker 03

  Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at siriusxm.com/conan. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

• 1:11:33Speaker 03

  Hey, that's me, Teddy Swims. You hear that? That's life. So go grab it. Grab your old friends, grab new friends, grab a White Claw. Grab flavor for everyone in your group. Grab music, laughter, and moments you'll never forget. You'll never regret it. Oh, hey, man. Grab new friends, grab old friends, grab life by the glow. White Claw. Please drink responsibly. White Claw Seltzer, Chicago, Illinois.

• 1:12:04Conan O'Brien?

  When you hear Alka Seltzer, you probably think heartburn, right?

• 1:12:06Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 1:12:07Conan O'Brien?

  Well, did you know Alka Seltzer has a line of cold and flu medications known as Alka Seltzer Cold? Did you know that, David?

• 1:12:14Speaker 05

  No, but I feel like we need it.

• 1:12:15Conan O'Brien?

  Why didn't you know that, David?

• 1:12:17Speaker 05

  I know, you expect me to know everything.

• 1:12:18Conan O'Brien?

  I knew this.

• 1:12:19Speaker 05

  Did you?

• 1:12:20Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I've tried it, it's really good. And I like that fizzy, fizzy, fizzy when you drop the Alka Seltzer Cold into the water.

• 1:12:26Speaker 05

  You do, yeah.

• 1:12:27Conan O'Brien?

  Alka Seltzer Cold Fast Dissolves Tablets are designed to deliver cold and flu relief fast. Just drop the two tablets in water and hear those bubbles bursting into action, ready to work faster than pills. Bubbles faster than pills. Pills take time to dissolve, not bubbles. Next time a cold or flu strikes, quick! Alka Seltzer Cold. Nothing works faster for cold and flu symptom relief. Among oral products used as directed.