Paul Rudd Returns Again

Actor Paul Rudd feels right chuffed about being Conan O’Brien’s friend. Paul sits down with Conan once more to discuss his father’s obsession with the Titanic, playing low-authority goofballs in Anchorman and Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and teaming up with Jack Black in his latest film Anaconda. Later, Conan tries to remember if he was ever on Star Search. For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com. Got a question for Conan? Call our voicemail: (669) 587-2847.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  Hey, it's me, Teddy Swims. You hear that? That's life. So go grab it. Grab your old friends, grab new friends, grab a White Claw. Grab flavor for everyone in your group. Grab music, laughter, and moments you'll never forget. You'll never regret it.

• 0:21Speaker 01

  Oh, hey, man.

• 0:22Speaker 00

  Grab new friends, grab old friends, grab life by the claw. White Claw. Please drink responsibly. White Claw Celta Works, Chicago, Illinois.

• 0:34Conan O'Brien?

  Have you ever had a cat, Sona?

• 0:35Speaker 03

  Never.

• 0:36Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, I have had multiple cats.

• 0:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 0:38Conan O'Brien?

  I had a cat growing up. It was my cat. My wife and I now have three cats.

• 0:42Speaker 03

  That's a lot.

• 0:43Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, we have three cats and two dogs. And I have to say, the dogs are so appreciative. Cats, hard to win over.

• 0:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 0:50Conan O'Brien?

  Cats are cats. They're tricky.

• 0:51Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 0:52Conan O'Brien?

  Sometimes I feel like I'm working for them. You know? Well, Temptations Classic Cat Treats is the solution, okay? Temptations Classic Cat Treats are the crunchy outside, soft inside treat any cat obsesses over. Each treat is under 2 calories per treat. It's 100% nutricially complete and balanced for adult cats.

• 1:11Speaker 03

  Oh, good.

• 1:11Conan O'Brien?

  That's important. And to appeal to cats with finer palates, Temptations Lickable Puree has a perfectly creamy texture they can't get enough of. Some say the Roman Empire collapsed because the Romans became too obsessed with their own pleasure. Is this a sign of things to come? I don't think so. Look for a way to make bonding with your feline friend even better. Try America's number one cat treat brand, Temptations Cat Treats. Cats can't resist.

• 1:45Speaker 04

  Hi, my name is Paul Rudd.

• 1:50Speaker 04

  And I feel right-chuffed about being Conan O'Brien's friend.

• 1:59Speaker 05

  Fall is here, hear the yell. Back to school, ring the bell. Brand new shoes, walking loose. Climb the fence, books and pens. I can tell that we are gonna be friends. Yes, I can tell that we are gonna be friends.

• 2:18Conan O'Brien?

  Hey there, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. Joined as always by my whack pack, Son of Obsession, Matt Gourley.

• 2:25Speaker 06

  Whack day to you, sir.

• 2:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, we go, we go, traffic backing up on the 101. Cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo. Let's do some prank phone calls. Hello, pizza parlor? Yes, this is the pizza parlor. Oh, yeah. You got, is your refrigerator running? What? We have an oven. Oh, sorry. If you had a refrigerator and it's running, I'd say, better catch it. What? This is me doing a bad prank phone call.

• 2:51Speaker 06

  I'm more curious why this pizza place doesn't have a refrigerator.

• 2:54Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:55Conan O'Brien?

  Well, there was a blackout.

• 2:56Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 2:57Conan O'Brien?

  This is why I don't do prank calls.

• 2:59Speaker 03

  And also, what kind of whack pack is this when you're just doing everything?

• 3:03Conan O'Brien?

  Ring, ring, ring. Hello, we're a hospital. Yeah, I think one of the patients died. Sir, what are you calling for? April Fools.

• 3:12Speaker 03

  That's bad.

• 3:13Conan O'Brien?

  Is that a prank call?

• 3:13Speaker 03

  Because someone could have died.

• 3:15Conan O'Brien?

  No, that's one I'm banking on.

• 3:16Speaker 03

  Doctors are like scrambling now.

• 3:17Conan O'Brien?

  Hey, the odds are someone probably did.

• 3:19Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 3:20Conan O'Brien?

  Hello, baked bean company? Yes. Do people eat your baked beans and then they have gas afterwards? Ha, ha, ha, just kidding. This is the president.

• 3:31Speaker 06

  Do you want to hear a quick, real joke that my daughter made up?

• 3:34Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 3:34Speaker 06

  Well, there's two, and this was the spectrum. The first one, pretty solid. Knock, knock.

• 3:38Conan O'Brien?

  Who's there?

• 3:38Speaker 06

  Party.

• 3:39Conan O'Brien?

  Party who?

• 3:39Speaker 06

  Porta party.

• 3:40Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 3:41Speaker 06

  That's pretty good.

• 3:42Conan O'Brien?

  Solid B plus.

• 3:42Speaker 03

  Four years old.

• 3:43Conan O'Brien?

  Guess what? She got, she got bad on the ball. It's an infield, single.

• 3:46Speaker 06

  Yeah, four years old?

• 3:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:47Speaker 06

  And then the next one, knock, knock.

• 3:49Conan O'Brien?

  Who's there?

• 3:49Speaker 06

  Mouth.

• 3:50Conan O'Brien?

  Mouth who?

• 3:51Speaker 06

  You don't have a mouth, you can't talk, you're dumb, you have poopy on your head.

• 3:54Conan O'Brien?

  I like that one better. I like that one better because that's, that's right up there with the pranks I was just doing. Um, no, we are here to have a real conversation, which is Sona. And maybe you've noticed this, but when we do the conversations with people and we're about to start a record, you need to keep talking. You do, Sona. And I've noticed that if we, hold on, don't make that judgy face. Well, she was looking at me. I was responding to her. I noticed that when we do, uh, fan phone calls, you know, when they, when they come up, the Zooms where the fans are calling, you love to talk right up till the very second that they come on. You just do, Sona. I accuse you. I accuse. I think you need to turn that finger right around.

• 4:39Speaker 03

  Right around to you, sir. Right around to you, sir.

• 4:43Conan O'Brien?

  I'm gonna turn it around 360 degrees so it's pointed back at you.

• 4:46Speaker 03

  Do a 180 degree.

• 4:47Conan O'Brien?

  But you broke your wrist.

• 4:48Speaker 03

  Do a 180 and then do a thing. Do this. This is more accurate.

• 4:52Conan O'Brien?

  Wait, now it's pointing at me?

• 4:53Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 4:54Conan O'Brien?

  Do you think, if the finger's pointing at me, then I must do it?

• 4:56Speaker 03

  First of all, when we're having a conversation, okay? Like, everyone's talking and I might be in the middle of something.

• 5:03Conan O'Brien?

  You're always in the middle of something.

• 5:04Speaker 03

  And then you don't let me finish what I was saying.

• 5:07Conan O'Brien?

  That's exactly right. Not only that, but you offer, just go, shut up. Here's a can of shut up sauce. Shut up. No, no.

• 5:13Speaker 03

  You just offered me, what did you offer me right before we started recording?

• 5:16Conan O'Brien?

  I said, you want a slice of shut the fuck up pie?

• 5:19Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 5:19Conan O'Brien?

  And then I said, hey, actually, maybe you double up. Maybe two slices.

• 5:23Speaker 03

  Thank you. Thank you.

• 5:24Conan O'Brien?

  But that's a polite way of saying to someone, you might want to curtail your conversation.

• 5:27Speaker 03

  No, but you, you say that and then you expect me not to respond to you and then you're like, okay, we're gonna start. And then you get frustrated with me because I'm still talking. This is, I'm a normal person. And you know what?

• 5:37Conan O'Brien?

  Well, hold on. Hold on a second. No, I'm just kidding.

• 5:39Speaker 03

  And then usually, right before the fan, you start throwing things at people. Cause that moment where we're waiting, you can't sit still.

• 5:47Conan O'Brien?

  Are you saying that maybe I'm the problem with Conan O'Brien needs a friend?

• 5:53Speaker 03

  Yes, you are, I'm not, you're not, you, you are the problem.

• 5:57Conan O'Brien?

  And maybe lashing out at you was me projecting.

• 6:01Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 6:02Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 6:03Speaker 03

  Do you have, do you want to apologize?

• 6:04Conan O'Brien?

  No, I want to make another prank phone call.

• 6:08Speaker 03

  No.

• 6:08Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I wanna make a prank phone call.

• 6:10Speaker 03

  But they're so bad.

• 6:10Conan O'Brien?

  Hello dentist's office? Yes, this is a dentist's office. Okay, you must be sad right now. You must be feeling down in the mouth. Excuse me, sir, come again? Uh, I wish I could come again.

• 6:23Conan O'Brien?

  Sir? What are you talking about? Uh, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. Wait, sir? What's going on? I'm Conan O'Brien. I mean, I'm not Conan O'Brien. I gotta go. Eh. Was that a good prank call?

• 6:38Speaker 03

  No, they're bad. They're all bad. Also, you can't say anything about you. I feel like you would be like, this is Conan O'Brien, here's a prank call. Like, you would say to the beginning.

• 6:47Conan O'Brien?

  I probably would mess it up, yeah. Yeah, I never made prank calls. I've never made them in my life.

• 6:52Speaker 06

  Really?

• 6:53Conan O'Brien?

  No, you would be good at it.

• 6:54Speaker 06

  As a kid, I all the time.

• 6:56Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, no, I would be terrified. I would, I would be overly conceptual. I'd say, this is Abe Lincoln calling from 1864.

• 7:03Speaker 03

  Oh, God.

• 7:04Conan O'Brien?

  Still got a year to live. Although I'm shot in early 1865, spring, if you will. And then just they hang up and I keep talking. It would be me talking over a hangup signal.

• 7:15Speaker 06

  There's some value to that.

• 7:16Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 7:17Speaker 03

  It's hard now, cuz I'll, like, caller ID and stuff.

• 7:21Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, no, I forgot about caller ID. I've been, I tried a bunch of these yesterday and they went very badly.

• 7:26Speaker 03

  Did you call from your number?

• 7:27Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, of course I did.

• 7:28Speaker 03

  Oh, no, Conan.

• 7:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and I was like, hey, I hope something bad happens to you pretty soon. Ha, ha, ha.

• 7:33Speaker 06

  You called your wife and says, this is Conan's doctor. You need to be a lot nicer to him.

• 7:37Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 7:38Speaker 03

  Conan's doctor's saying that?

• 7:39Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 7:40Speaker 06

  Well, it is, world.

• 7:41Conan O'Brien?

  Of course, me, I panic and I forget my doctor's name.

• 7:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 7:44Conan O'Brien?

  I'm Dr. Not Conan.

• 7:47Conan O'Brien?

  My prescription for you is be nice to him. I would be terrible. I would be so nervous about prank calls. Just awful at them.

• 7:54Speaker 03

  I feel like you'd be nervous about anything that is slightly, like, bad.

• 7:58Speaker 06

  Right.

• 7:59Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 7:59Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 7:59Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 8:00Speaker 03

  You'd be the one who'd be like, guys, we shouldn't do this. Like, you're the like, guys, come on, guys, let's not.

• 8:05Speaker 06

  Let's be, let's be real.

• 8:06Speaker 03

  Let's not TP this house.

• 8:08Speaker 06

  Killed in a horror movie, basically.

• 8:09Speaker 03

  Oh, my God, you would die so fast.

• 8:11Conan O'Brien?

  Right, because I made, I ran in a bad direction.

• 8:14Speaker 06

  No, cuz you're like policing everybody. Like, we can't do that. We can't, we can't drink out here at camp. We can't. Where are you all going?

• 8:21Conan O'Brien?

  I'm gonna go into the woods and say my prayers.

• 8:23Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 8:23Speaker 03

  It's curfew time.

• 8:24Conan O'Brien?

  And then chop, chop, chop.

• 8:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:26Conan O'Brien?

  Someone's out there chopping onions. Okay. Fooled you. Sona, I think I owe you an apology.

• 8:31Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 8:31Conan O'Brien?

  I accused you of something which you may not do, although I'm, I kinda think she does.

• 8:36Speaker 06

  Well.

• 8:36Conan O'Brien?

  I do, I swear to God, this is coming from a real place, which is, someone will be there like, okay, here's Sarah, who's calling in from Cincinnati, you are often talking.

• 8:46Speaker 06

  But I think she's doing it to prove a point, because you've just served her shut up pie.

• 8:51Speaker 03

  Yes, and you're also.

• 8:52Conan O'Brien?

  It's not always, it's also be quiet soup.

• 8:54Speaker 03

  You're also throwing, you're also crumpling up paper and throwing them at people.

• 8:57Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 8:58Conan O'Brien?

  Remember when I said, have a slice of, hold your tongue, tongue, it's actual tongue from a deli? Remember that?

• 9:03Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 9:04Speaker 03

  Can you, do you really think, when we're waiting for the callers to come up on Conan Needs a Fan, do you actually think you sit there calmly waiting, and I'm the problem? Please, tell, tell the truth.

• 9:15Conan O'Brien?

  I'm told, I make a lot of erratic motions.

• 9:18Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 9:19Speaker 06

  You've usually got your glasses on upside down.

• 9:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 9:21Conan O'Brien?

  It's funny.

• 9:22Speaker 06

  I'm not saying it isn't.

• 9:23Conan O'Brien?

  Can I say something?

• 9:24Speaker 06

  You've always got your headphones on, uh, front to back.

• 9:27Speaker 03

  You do, you have one, one tooth walrus.

• 9:30Conan O'Brien?

  That's someone with ESP doing a podcast. He's got the, the headphones on his forehead and the back of his head.

• 9:36Speaker 06

  You have another joke for that, that you usually do, but that, that's a new one.

• 9:39Conan O'Brien?

  I just make up stuff.

• 9:40Speaker 06

  Well, that sounds pretty good.

• 9:41Speaker 03

  You do pen mustache, or sometimes you do one tooth walrus guy?

• 9:45Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 9:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 9:45Conan O'Brien?

  I put, uh, one, a pen on one side of my mouth, so that just one pen's hanging down, uh, and I look at Sona and I go, I'm half a walrus. And, um.

• 9:57Speaker 06

  This is while we're waiting for this person to pop up on the screen.

• 9:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:00Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. But then, Sona's responding to my, I'm a tornado of, of bad bits, some of them quite good. Glasses upside down is funny, because that's not the way you should wear them.

• 10:11Speaker 06

  They're all pretty funny, I mean.

• 10:12Conan O'Brien?

  Thank you. So, and so I'm doing my bits, I'm getting my laughs, and then she's trying to get me to calm down, or responding to my attacks on her, when Sarah from Cincinnati or Buffalo comes up.

• 10:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, just admit, you wanna do bits and you don't want me to react to them.

• 10:27Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, that's it.

• 10:27Speaker 03

  Oh, that's what you want?

• 10:28Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 10:28Speaker 03

  Okay, alright, no. No, the answer is no. When we're having a conversation, I'm not just gonna stop talking. And I think you're used to like television, you know, three, two, one, and then this.

• 10:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 10:40Speaker 03

  And everything stops, but this is, we start, when we start.

• 10:45Speaker 06

  We're out of time, so shut up both of you.

• 10:46Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, alright, well guess what?

• 10:48Speaker 03

  Well, you're forgiven.

• 10:49Conan O'Brien?

  Sona, I think you're 40% right in this one.

• 10:52Speaker 03

  I forgive you.

• 10:53Conan O'Brien?

  50, 55. This is just like, I hate being in the middle like this.

• 10:56Speaker 03

  I forgive you.

• 10:57Conan O'Brien?

  You're not in the middle.

• 10:58Speaker 03

  I forgive you.

• 10:59Conan O'Brien?

  Trust me, you're getting yours in the next episode.

• 11:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, I forgive you.

• 11:01Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, well, we should get started.

• 11:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:03Conan O'Brien?

  Apologies, I guess we each apologize to each other. Here we go.

• 11:06Speaker 03

  I didn't apologize.

• 11:06Conan O'Brien?

  Equally wrong, here we go.

• 11:07Speaker 03

  I forgive you.

• 11:08Conan O'Brien?

  You're doing it again. Equally wrong. You're both doing it again. Equally wrong. You're doing it again, stop it. Both at fault. Why am I involved in this? More Sona than me. I'm bailing out.

• 11:14Speaker 03

  Forgive it.

• 11:15Conan O'Brien?

  This is the last thing I'm gonna say. Sona 70, me 30. I'm back. Sona 75, me whatever is the rest of 75. Can't do the math right now. Too busy riffing. It's Friday. Sona 80. Please. Me whatever's left over after 80.

• 11:25Speaker 03

  Forgive it.

• 11:26Conan O'Brien?

  I think it's 20, but I can't be sure.

• 11:27Speaker 03

  Forgive, go.

• 11:27Conan O'Brien?

  Alright, we're gonna get going. We gotta get started.

• 11:29Speaker 03

  Forgive.

• 11:29Conan O'Brien?

  We gotta go.

• 11:29Speaker 03

  Forgive it.

• 11:30Conan O'Brien?

  Alright.

• 11:30Speaker 03

  Forgive.

• 11:30Conan O'Brien?

  Last word. Blah blah blah blah blah. My guest today has starred in such films as Ant-Man, Avengers: Endgame, and Anchorman. Now you can see him in the new movie, Anaconda. Very excited he's here today.

• 11:46Conan O'Brien?

  Paul Rudd, welcome.

• 11:52Conan O'Brien?

  Right chuffed. I forgot and I shouldn't have about your English lineage. Your parents are, uh, are English. You're like, from England.

• 12:02Speaker 04

  Yeah, both of my parents were born in London.

• 12:03Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 12:04Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:04Conan O'Brien?

  And you changed your name. Your name was Huffin Piddleton. And you changed it to Rudd.

• 12:10Speaker 04

  Well, it was, uh, it was a hyphen. It was Huffin Piddleton Rudd.

• 12:17Speaker 04

  So, uh, but it already, yeah.

• 12:18Conan O'Brien?

  You are Eustace Nigel Huffin Piddleton Rudd. And I forgot about that because you went to a serious acting academy.

• 12:28Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:28Conan O'Brien?

  This blows everyone away. No, you went to a very intense, was it at Oxford? Where was it?

• 12:33Speaker 04

  Yeah, went to Oxford for, it was just a semester. But it was, uh, it was studying Jacobean drama, which, I mean, already makes no sense if you know me and all.

• 12:42Conan O'Brien?

  I just did a thing, uh, at Oxford weeks ago, and the minute you get there, it is Hogwarts.

• 12:49Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:50Conan O'Brien?

  It is Hogwarts. It's ridiculous, and you immediately feel unworthy. That's just how I felt. I felt, you're walking around, you think everyone has an owl, and...

• 13:03Speaker 04

  Everyone does, by the way.

• 13:04Conan O'Brien?

  And they do. And, um, they're all playing kiddich. Or is it squiddich? It's neither. Which one do you, what do you call it?

• 13:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's squiddich.

• 13:13Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, I'm sorry, Huffington Piddlebone.

• 13:16Conan O'Brien?

  I don't know your fancy terms.

• 13:17Speaker 04

  Not at all. No, it's just I grew up playing it, so I just know it.

• 13:22Conan O'Brien?

  But I immediately, I don't know if you had this feeling, did you feel accepted there?

• 13:27Speaker 04

  No, I didn't feel as if I belonged there at all.

• 13:29Conan O'Brien?

  How old were you at the time?

• 13:30Speaker 04

  Oh, I must have been 21.

• 13:34Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 13:34Speaker 04

  And you're right, you feel as if you're just a part of something that is so important and old and historic. And I mean, there was a pub that I would go to, kind of before class and after. That low ceilings, wow, this is this, when was this built? This has had, been here a while. And then I ask, and oh no, this is from 1200, this pub.

• 13:58Speaker 03

  Oh my god!

• 13:59Speaker 04

  Yeah. 1200 is built, this one's from the Middle Ages. It's not even the oldest one here.

• 14:04Conan O'Brien?

  I grew up in Massachusetts and there are some houses and buildings there you'd see sometimes it would say 1634. And I would think, oh my god, the oldest structures known to man. Cause I was a kid.

• 14:18Speaker 04

  Right.

• 14:19Conan O'Brien?

  Then you go to someplace in England and you know, you'll be at a copy quick. This is back in the day, you know, you'll be, or you'll go into a drugstore to get, you know, some, some, some mints, some Tic Tacs. And you'll ask them, this is a nice old building. And they'll say, yeah, it's from 2AD.

• 14:37Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 14:38Conan O'Brien?

  Jesus bought his Tic Tacs here.

• 14:42Conan O'Brien?

  It's crazy.

• 14:43Speaker 04

  It's crazy.

• 14:44Conan O'Brien?

  That was, I was exaggerating a lot. Did you like that?

• 14:46Speaker 03

  No, I really thought you meant 2AD.

• 14:48Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I mess around and I think Paul got it.

• 14:50Speaker 04

  Jesus actually had polo mints, if we want to get really. Yeah, and he went to a chemist. Tree board.

• 14:55Conan O'Brien?

  He went to a chemist, I'm sorry.

• 14:57Speaker 04

  Yeah, the irony was, he would go to Boots. It was Boots, but he'd never wore boots.

• 15:04Speaker 04

  All sandals with him.

• 15:07Conan O'Brien?

  He was ostracized at Boots? No, because he wasn't wearing boots.

• 15:11Speaker 04

  Get out of here.

• 15:12Conan O'Brien?

  So, I forgot about that because you really do. I remember talking to you once and you were talking to me. This is in our private conversations, which there are many. And you always like, don't record this, so I don't. But you were telling me all about your parents and they were the real deal.

• 15:26Speaker 04

  The real deal.

• 15:27Conan O'Brien?

  And you, I think you told me your dad knows like everything about the Titanic, like everything.

• 15:31Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah. He was a Titanic expert and traveled the world speaking about Titanic.

• 15:37Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I have a brother Neil who's the exact same thing. He will tell you he knows which rivet went where.

• 15:43Speaker 04

  Really?

• 15:43Conan O'Brien?

  All that kind of stuff.

• 15:44Speaker 04

  So they, they would have been friends. Yeah, my dad was part of the Titanic Historical Society. Back before even Ballard discovered the ship. I grew up going to, I guess the way I would describe them might be Trekkie Conventions.

• 16:00Conan O'Brien?

  About the Titanic?

• 16:00Speaker 04

  With just other people who are interested in Titanic and, but nautical history,

• 16:07Speaker 04

  presidential history, World War II history. I mean, he was a history fanatic, my father. And so, yeah, I grew up around all kinds of.

• 16:15Conan O'Brien?

  This is a real side thing?

• 16:16Speaker 04

  Articles and cutouts and things like that. All kinds of stuff.

• 16:20Conan O'Brien?

  Cutouts of what? And this is all, did your dad, I mean.

• 16:25Speaker 04

  Your dad is not a cutout of Neville Chamberlain?

• 16:29Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, I have that one. Does, okay, did your, I'm guessing he did. I'm hoping you, did your dad live to see the Titanic discovered?

• 16:38Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 16:38Conan O'Brien?

  Because that would have been a seismic, you know, he thought about this thing his whole life and then they said, hey, we found it and here's pictures of it. Cause that, that's what it was like for my brother. When they found it, my brother was just blown away because he knew everything about it. And he was really disappointed that the ship broke in half and was in kind of a mess. Cause he always dreamed they'll find it and then they'll float it to the surface and we can all ride around in it. No, it's just a pile of bolts at the bottom of the ocean.

• 17:08Speaker 04

  Yeah, and rusticles.

• 17:09Conan O'Brien?

  Rusticles, yeah.

• 17:11Speaker 04

  Which I have. Uh.

• 17:14Conan O'Brien?

  No one had to know that. Not everyone showered with you.

• 17:17Speaker 04

  So, uh. I don't know if they feel like wrestling.

• 17:25Speaker 04

  And it was the exact same scene in my house when it was discovered.

• 17:30Conan O'Brien?

  1985.

• 17:31Speaker 04

  Eighty-five. Uh, my dad lost his mind and it was the most, he couldn't, he was giddy forever and he would just show me pictures. He framed, I think, Newsweek magazine, the cover, it was on the wall. It was such huge news in our.

• 17:49Conan O'Brien?

  Did he like the movie? Cause I think Titanic buffs like the movie. But then there's always gonna be that guy that's like, oh, the antique car they love, the French Renault.

• 18:02Speaker 04

  Right.

• 18:02Conan O'Brien?

  That's a 1913, not a 1912.

• 18:05Speaker 04

  Right, exactly.

• 18:06Conan O'Brien?

  And those people still hunt.

• 18:08Speaker 04

  They know. Bugs them.

• 18:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, they hunt the director down and say, come on, Cameron.

• 18:12Speaker 04

  So my dad, I asked him when it came out, I go, well, you know, what'd you think? And he said, he said, I do think that of all of the Titanic films and the things that they've made about Titanic, that this film probably captured what the experience was most like.

• 18:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 18:27Speaker 04

  And he also thought the technical side of it, the, all of the rivets, all of the china, the way the, it was like, he said, that's exactly as it was. And to see all of that was thrilling to him. He didn't care about the story at all.

• 18:43Conan O'Brien?

  And he. What about when Rose is being sketched with her breasts out? Was she suddenly like, that was fantastic?

• 18:53Conan O'Brien?

  Dad, take it easy.

• 18:54Speaker 04

  No.

• 18:54Conan O'Brien?

  Mom's in the room. Hamina, hamina, hamina.

• 18:57Speaker 04

  He was furious because he knew for a fact that Chez Lange was not on the show.

• 19:02Conan O'Brien?

  There you go. There you go.

• 19:04Speaker 04

  He, uh, yeah.

• 19:05Conan O'Brien?

  That's all he's thinking while she's naked.

• 19:08Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's like, wait a minute.

• 19:09Conan O'Brien?

  No, Chez Lange.

• 19:10Speaker 04

  No, come on.

• 19:10Conan O'Brien?

  Please keep it down.

• 19:13Speaker 04

  He said, he goes, he goes, now there was a, he said, there was a, a, a boy in steerage named Jack Thayer. He goes, I'm assuming they took some of what, uh, Jack Thayer's life and his stories, like, and kind of, you know, created the DiCaprio character. He said, but it's, there's so many interesting stories about Titanic. I don't know why they had to make one up. This is my, you know, my father, the, the history fan.

• 19:36Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. It was a total miss with audiences. And then he also, I don't see why you need DiCaprio at all.

• 19:41Speaker 04

  Well, well, tell the story of Jack Thayer.

• 19:43Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 19:46Conan O'Brien?

  I know your dad is theater critic. Whoa.

• 19:51Speaker 04

  But my dad was also, you know, like, uh, Apocalypse Now, that wasn't the Vietnam War. Why didn't they take, you know, he was like, he's like, no, dad, that's Joseph, you would, he, they, he only saw the historically accurate sides of, yeah.

• 20:04Conan O'Brien?

  Sure.

• 20:04Speaker 04

  So.

• 20:05Conan O'Brien?

  I had the, uh, got to interview, uh, Quentin Tarantino a number of times and I told him about my brother Neil watching, watching What's Upon a Time in Hollywood. And Neil's that guy who yells out, uh, that's a 71 Pontiac. This is 1969. They weren't out yet. And, um, so Tarantino has, like, he later on said to me, oh, man, just keep your brother Neil away from, did Neil like the movie?

• 20:32Conan O'Brien?

  Cause he's that guy.

• 20:33Speaker 04

  I'm pulling out, I'm having this memory of something and forgive me, cause I'm pulling out my phone. You'll trim around this, uh, but.

• 20:40Conan O'Brien?

  The hell I will. Maybe we won't. Yeah, uh, just get that ad out for Apple.

• 20:44Speaker 04

  So, here, I just found it, cause a friend of mine texted me this the other day, because we were talking about this very thing. And a movie that my father hated was, uh, Life is Beautiful.

• 20:54Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, my God. Hated it. No one hates that movie.

• 20:57Speaker 04

  My dad hated it. Now, keep in mind, my father could not escape Holocaust documentaries.

• 21:05Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 21:05Speaker 04

  Growing up, I didn't realize color television existed until I was a teenager. But he hated, what? Hated that movie so much.

• 21:15Conan O'Brien?

  Roberto Benigni, it's a masterpiece.

• 21:17Speaker 04

  Well, I was just reminded about my father's hatred of this movie, cause a friend of mine texted, he said, I still laugh at your father talking about that movie. And, because, again, not historically accurate. And my father referred to it as Laurel and Hardy Go to Auschwitz.

• 21:43Speaker 04

  Which I completely forgotten about that.

• 21:46Conan O'Brien?

  Oh my god.

• 21:47Speaker 04

  I had forgotten about that. I got that text and I started laughing so hard. I'm like, "Oh god, that's right. He did. He really did."

• 21:57Conan O'Brien?

  Why don't they just talk about the real camp?

• 22:08Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 22:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, I love awards.

• 22:11Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 22:25Speaker 03

  Nice.

• 22:26Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 22:34Speaker 03

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 22:39Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5N, which I love.

• 22:42Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 22:43Conan O'Brien?

  Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 22:58Speaker 03

  Hello!

• 22:59Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty, it's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality innovation technology and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View US News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

• 23:33Conan O'Brien?

  When it comes to insurance, Farmers doesn't like surprises. That's why there's Farmers coverage on a page. What is it you ask? Did you ask? I don't think you did, but let's pretend you did.

• 23:44Speaker 03

  What is that?

• 23:45Conan O'Brien?

  It's your coverage on a page, pretty straightforward.

• 23:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:48Conan O'Brien?

  That's good, because sometimes it gets confusing, you know? What am I covered for, what am I not? Here, it's all on a page. Does your insurance do that? Get a quote to get started at Farmers.com. Don't be confused, don't wonder. Farmers makes it pretty clear. Underwritten by Farmers Truck or Fire Insurance Exchanges or Affiliate. Products not available in every state.

• 24:10Conan O'Brien?

  Who do you shop for first on the holidays, Sona? Was it, do you shop for the kids, or do you shop for Tac?

• 24:14Speaker 03

  My kids.

• 24:14Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 24:15Speaker 03

  Or Okie.

• 24:15Conan O'Brien?

  You gotta get them your stuff.

• 24:16Speaker 03

  Or my dog.

• 24:17Conan O'Brien?

  And then your husband is last. Well, guess what? It's that time of year, you feel that, you smell that cinnamon cider in the air? Do you smell that?

• 24:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:27Conan O'Brien?

  And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. A little early to buy a turkey.

• 24:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:32Conan O'Brien?

  Doesn't matter. Holidays? I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliche. It's very nearby in the cupboard. Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy with low prices on the gifts you want, even this early in the season. So get ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent calendars at low prices. Get a head start on holiday gifting with Amazon's low prices. Shop now at Amazon.com/holiday.

• 25:06Conan O'Brien?

  You know, you are never far from my mind, because Instagram knows what I like. You know, you have these, you know, these little sites that you go on, and they learn you real quickly. And so mine's always showing me, you know, here's another Beatles guitar solo you can learn how to play. Or here's, you know, it's constantly showing me the things it knows I'm gonna like, and showing me historic stuff. It knows that I can watch Anchorman clips until the sun goes down, and then well beyond that. And the one it keeps sending me over and over and over again is Sex Panther. And I, and so I know it cold, you unveiling your cologne to Will Ferrell.

• 25:50Conan O'Brien?

  And one of the things I love about so much is, I think in the history of comedy, it's the most, it's the two most self-satisfied people I've ever seen. In any situation, you're unveiling your cologne. He's so pleased for you and impressed. You're so pleased with yourself. And I would just put it out there to look like. People go back and look at this clip and I, people do all the time, but it is to me, the epiphany, the acme, the high point of two idiots who are happy with themselves. And it always makes me happy every single time I watch it.

• 26:26Speaker 04

  Uh, thank you. Well, it, it is. You are dead on the money. These are two morons who think they've got it all figured out. And that's always such a fun, fun thing to play, certainly. And Will is so good at it. And that was one of the hardest moments I laughed. You know, Will doesn't really break character too much.

• 26:48Conan O'Brien?

  No, no.

• 26:49Speaker 04

  Um, and he really got me. Uh, I, I, I do. Um, but he really made me laugh when we were doing that scene. And I thought, oh, yeah, because there is kind of so much improvisation and I thought, and then I said, uh, oh yeah, well, 60% of the time it, it, it works every time. And I thought like, oh, that will make him, uh, laugh. And he didn't even smile and he just said, that doesn't make any sense.

• 27:14Conan O'Brien?

  That doesn't.

• 27:14Speaker 04

  And, and then I lost it.

• 27:16Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. It doesn't make any sense.

• 27:18Speaker 04

  It's really the one moment of clarity that either one of us has.

• 27:22Conan O'Brien?

  Also, yeah. No, and then everything else is, hmm, he says pungent, pungent. And you, and, and then you're very confident about Sex Panther. And it's, it's, it's made of real bits of Panther, so you know it's good. There's another thing.

• 27:39Speaker 04

  That's quality. That's the one thing, yeah.

• 27:41Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. And then I, I think it's, hmm. Smells like gasoline.

• 27:47Conan O'Brien?

  Everything about.

• 27:48Speaker 04

  Pure gasoline.

• 27:49Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, pure gasoline. And so, I don't know, I just, I, uh, and you are so, I mean, one of the things that you're able to do in so many different, and we've talked about it, but in so many different parts you play. You're able to access this, you're incredibly likeable.

• 28:09Conan O'Brien?

  But you have no authority. You should not be respected and you don't care. Do you know what I mean? You're able to combine all those things at the same time. And I'm always delighted in forgetting Sarah Marshall. When you're the guy that hangs out on the beach and rent scuba equipment and stuff. That, I love that character. And again, you're just, and I think you were telling me once that that was just, you brought a lot of your own experience to that character.

• 28:35Speaker 04

  Well, there was, you know, when Jason was kind of, when he was writing it or when they were getting ready to shoot it. He said, you want to come, come to Hawaii? And you want to maybe play this surf instructor? And we were just talking about it. And it was just this idea that if you ever go to any of these resorts and there are guys there that teach surfing or diving or whatever. You meet them and feel like, oh, I've got it all kind of figured out. But the more you talk with them, you realize they're, they're running away from something or something's not right. And that just seemed like a funny, like, oh, yeah. Oh, no, I, I get it. But just really putting a hippie dippy positive spin on it. It's like, no, this is my journey or whatever it is.

• 29:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 29:20Speaker 04

  And so.

• 29:21Conan O'Brien?

  But no, he had no actual knowledge.

• 29:23Speaker 04

  None.

• 29:23Conan O'Brien?

  Of really anything.

• 29:24Speaker 04

  No.

• 29:25Conan O'Brien?

  He shouldn't be there. It was dangerous that he was working there.

• 29:28Speaker 04

  My, and the idea was that I was going to also play much older than I was. I wanted to be older. By the way, I said, I was like, I was 44 in that movie. And now I look up 44 and go, oh, my God, what a young, what a young kid I was. I was in my 30s when we did it and I tried to dye my hair gray. I want, I want gray hair, not even a wig. I should have just worn a wig. But I, I went and tried to dye my hair gray, but my hair is so dark that it just turned kind of red. And that's why my hair in that movie is just kinda red because I don't know how to, I had never dyed my hair.

• 30:10Conan O'Brien?

  I love how you'd think of, you know, this is a big movie and very successful movie, and a classic. Why are things so, hey, do you wanna come hang out in Hawaii? Maybe you could play this kinda guy. Hey, I have an idea. I'll be right back, I'm gonna go dye my own hair. You'd never think that that's how it came together.

• 30:29Speaker 04

  It's how it came together. And it was really, and even when I arrived, it was, I remember we, we filmed it in the, at the North Shore, the very, like, the top of Oahu. And when I landed, I was not tan. Big surprise. And they said, well, you should probably, you need to get a tan. So there's a place that you can get a spray tan. But it's on the southern part of Oahu. It was like two hours away or something. I landed on the plane, went directly to this spray tanning place. Drove, so that took like an hour and a half, drove another few hours to get to the North Shore where they were filming. Checked in the hotel, told them, I'm here. And then I went and took a shower.

• 31:17Speaker 04

  And I never knew that you have to let a spray tan-

• 31:21Conan O'Brien?

  Wait a minute.

• 31:21Speaker 04

  -settle in. And they had, no, like, it all came off. I was in the shower and it was, it's like Psycho of the color going down that drain. And I, they had to send me back. Right there. So then I had to drive another. First of all, to get from New York to Hawaii, it takes something like ten odd hours. It took me longer to get-

• 31:47Conan O'Brien?

  The spray tan.

• 31:47Speaker 04

  To get to the spray tan, twice. And then get back to set, yeah.

• 31:53Conan O'Brien?

  One of my favorite- One of my favorite things, it's just a, it's a, I guess a truism about a lot of my favorite kinds of comedy is, there's this thing that's in, in classic comedies, and I'm just gonna start with like The Three Stooges where you, you take someone who's a complete idiot, but you put them in a position that they'd never be in. So The Three Stooges, the rich people need plumbers, and plumbers show up, and they have a truck, they have all the equipment, they're clearly in the phone book, they're registered plumbers, the richest people in town are, are calling them up, so clearly they've done this before, and it's three people that literally can't take a hammer out of a bag without smashing vases

• 32:36Conan O'Brien?

  all around them, they don't know what a pipe is and things explode, and you see that over and over. Clouseau would never have been the most famous detective in the world, he's a complete idiot, and that's this thing that happens over and over and over again. I'm thinking, that is a thing that these films, like the Anchorman films, they do so well, is none of these people would be where they are.

• 32:56Speaker 04

  No.

• 32:57Conan O'Brien?

  And that's the thing, and this guy would never have been a beach instructor, but people are beamed into this reality, and once people accept that, everything's great.

• 33:07Speaker 04

  Right.

• 33:08Conan O'Brien?

  And it's just what you have to do.

• 33:09Speaker 04

  And it's so fun, in like Three Stooges, or, or Clouseau especially, that they wind up kind of winning despite the fact they're, of their ineptitude.

• 33:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 33:20Speaker 04

  Uh, the biggest example, or the most brilliant, I always think of is something like Being There.

• 33:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 33:26Speaker 04

  Where, you know, back in to every single victory, and what's so amazing about that movie, obviously, is that everyone around him thinks he's brilliant, whereas everyone else around Clouseau in these two just know they're morons.

• 33:39Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, yeah, yeah.

• 33:41Speaker 04

  But, um, yeah, it is a, it is a really, that's a, a good kind of construct, and I'm with you, they, that kind of thing.

• 33:48Conan O'Brien?

  It always fills me with delight.

• 33:49Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 33:50Conan O'Brien?

  Um, I don't know what it's like for you, you know, you- You probably didn't see the action hero thing coming for you because it

• 33:58Speaker 04

  Well, I was really pushing it.

• 34:01Conan O'Brien?

  You used to tell me all the time, I'm gonna be a Marvel action hero.

• 34:04Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 34:05Conan O'Brien?

  And I was belligerent, remember?

• 34:07Speaker 04

  No, I know. Oh, do I remember. Trust me.

• 34:09Conan O'Brien?

  And I was always pushing you and shoving you a lot. Oh. Hard and saying- Were you jealous? I remember thinking, I'm the one that's gonna be the Marvel superhero. Yeah. You know, uh, remember? Yeah. And I was just always, and then you'd pull it off. And I, and I was jealous for a long time.

• 34:25Speaker 04

  I mean, action here, I would have, I would, that's a, a, a small A, much like Ant-Man, small A. Uh, I don't think that I really fit into that mold so well. But, you know, I did get to, I did get to, uh, pretend I had a suit on and I got to do CGI and I went to the gym a lot. It was kind of fun to do all of that stuff, but

• 34:50Speaker 04

  in, in my bones, I don't think that I would ever, I could ever believe or feel authentically like I, uh, am right for the part.

• 35:00Conan O'Brien?

  But actually, that might be-

• 35:01Speaker 04

  But this is, but, yeah, but I was like, I'd take somebody like Odenkirk. And I mean, when I saw Nobody, that was, which I love that movie. The, the joy of seeing Bob Odenkirk just kick ass like that and be so good at it and so believable. He's an incredibly talented guy, but also, as you know, one of the funniest people on the planet. And so, I think that, you know, it, I don't think it really exists so much for me, even though the Marvel thing is real. I look at a guy like Odenkirk and think, well, that guy did it. And that guy, uh, is great at it.

• 35:36Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Well, he, they always thought about, that might have been maybe a key to why it works so well for Bob is, you know, I, I go way back with Bob and he's- You know, God, so insanely funny and creative and great. But he does have, he'd get angry about things. And I thought, oh, I think that might have been his way in is, you know, his, and he's tenacious. And I could, so I could see like, well, there are aspects of Bob and you are hilariously funny guy. He was also incredibly charming. And I was like, well, that's kind of your way in. You're very likeable. It's kind of your way into that character.

• 36:21Conan O'Brien?

  I can see why it makes sense, do you know?

• 36:24Speaker 04

  Well, how it even came about was Edgar Wright, who had, was going to direct the film. And it was Edgar that offered me that part. And I didn't, I really didn't know that much about Marvel. I mean, I had seen some of their, some of the films, but, and I had read some of the comics when I was a kid. I knew what they were, but it was never anything that I would have imagined getting involved with. But it was Edgar that offered, you know, and said like, do you want to play this? And I love Edgar and he was a friend of mine and I loved his films. And so I was very excited and then he wound up leaving the movie. And it was a bit of a chaotic scene there for a little bit, but I think the reason

• 37:07Speaker 04

  that maybe he wanted me to do it or was that it, you know, it's a, it's a guy who probably is ill-equipped to actually be a superhero.

• 37:17Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:18Speaker 04

  You know, and, and so I think that that was always my take on it. I'm not going to be Captain America and I'm not going to be Thor, even though we have incredibly similar physique. I, I just, I don't think.

• 37:33Conan O'Brien?

  I often confuse your torso.

• 37:35Speaker 04

  You know what it is?

• 37:35Conan O'Brien?

  I'm like, Ken's worth.

• 37:37Speaker 04

  The real problem is no one would buy me as a blonde.

• 37:39Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:42Conan O'Brien?

  Especially if you dye your own hair.

• 37:45Speaker 04

  Well, I'm here for Thor. I'm gonna go dye my hair. Thor doesn't have blue hair on the south end of the island. I'll be back. We shoot in 10 minutes. I'll be there.

• 37:57Conan O'Brien?

  You know, um, I very much wanted to see your new film Anaconda and they said I could get a link. And then they told me this morning, uh, cause I was gonna get up this, watch it this morning and they said, no. The link does not work, so I blame your people because I have not seen it. But, well, no, I, I'm, I wanted to see it and I really wanted to see it for free.

• 38:19Speaker 04

  That's the only way to see anything anymore, I think.

• 38:21Conan O'Brien?

  But I'm excited to see it because, um, it surprised me. I know that technically you and Jack Black have worked together before, but this is a real two-hander, uh, and I'm excited about that. I'm very excited about it.

• 38:36Speaker 04

  He's the greatest, as you well know. There's nobody, I mean, he is a tornado of

• 38:42Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 38:42Speaker 04

  Of comedy and talent, um, truly of talent. And so it was, I was so excited to work with the guy. And yeah, we'd worked together before, but never like this. And so he's terrific and he's great. I actually have, I, I don't have a link or anything like that, but I think they are, I do have a clip of it, but they, um, it's so fun and it's such a funny way to kind of go into this idea of doing a retelling of Anaconda. Do you remember the original?

• 39:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, I remember the original. Um, and what I loved about this idea, cause at first I thought, are they doing a remake of Anaconda? And I didn't understand just based on like the poster. And that's what I was interested to see. And then I found out that it's about two friends that want to go, they're, they're fans. They want to go back and make their own version

• 39:33Speaker 04

  Right.

• 39:33Conan O'Brien?

  Of Anaconda.

• 39:34Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 39:35Conan O'Brien?

  Based on the 97 film, when things start to happen, uh, that take over. I'm sure you could explain this a lot better than I could, but.

• 39:42Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, there's, there, uh, so we all, a group of four of us, it's, it's Jack Black, Steve Zahn and Tandaway Newton. And we grew up together. We used to make films, you know, like so many of us do growing up, like little movies with our friends. And, um, and Anaconda happened to be a movie that we loved growing up. Even though technically, if you do the math, we were all probably about 40 when it came out.

• 40:11Speaker 04

  But that's the

• 40:11Conan O'Brien?

  Eh, it doesn't matter.

• 40:12Speaker 04

  That's the first suspension of disbelief.

• 40:14Conan O'Brien?

  Doesn't matter, yeah.

• 40:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, and so, and so we, uh, yeah, so we decide, we just, we decide to do, uh, I have the rights to Anaconda our lives now as just fifty-somethings. They're not working out the way that we're, we thought they would, or forty-somethings, or however, whatever. Wait, you have the rights? My character.

• 40:33Conan O'Brien?

  Your character does.

• 40:34Speaker 04

  My character.

• 40:34Conan O'Brien?

  Your character does.

• 40:35Speaker 04

  And you'll learn how. Okay, but still, okay. You'll learn how, and, um, uh...

• 40:40Conan O'Brien?

  He got them seventy years ago, when he was forty.

• 40:43Speaker 04

  There's a reason, there's a very, it's funny, there's actually, there actually is, there is a, there is, there is an explanation, and it's funny, because it is what I have for, to show you, of how I have the rights. Okay. Uh, for this, uh, for Anaconda, and I am explaining to them, and we decide, like, "Look, guys, I really miss making, uh, movies when we were kids, like, we can do this, let's do, we loved this movie when we were growing up."

• 41:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 41:09Speaker 04

  Uh, yeah, "Let's do it, let's do it." And then, of course, you know, things start to go wrong, but then all of a sudden, "Wait, maybe we're getting on to my real Anaconda."

• 41:16Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 41:17Speaker 04

  So it's like a meta-version of, kind of, it's an interesting, uh, it is an interesting, uh, way to kind of retell a story that's never been told before.

• 41:27Conan O'Brien?

  Right. So what's it like, um, first of all, I, I agree with you, everything you said about Jack Black being, you know, the most talented guy, and insanely off the just nuclear powerhouse of creativity and fun, um, but whenever I run into him, his beard, his beard is insane, his real-life beard, it's, and that might be the most, as impressive as Jack Black is, I think his beard impresses me more than anything else. It's really something.

• 42:01Speaker 04

  It really is, and it's, uh, yeah, it's got like three different areas of gray.

• 42:06Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, no, that's what I'm talking about, it's not just, it's not just, I mean, okay, Letterman has this great beard, but no, Jack's has, different parts of his beard have lived different lives. And they come from different...

• 42:20Speaker 04

  Sunburst on a guitar.

• 42:21Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, exactly, yeah.

• 42:23Speaker 04

  It's exactly, yeah.

• 42:24Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 42:24Speaker 04

  It's like a mix of...

• 42:25Conan O'Brien?

  They're swirling and churning.

• 42:27Speaker 04

  Quicksilver.

• 42:28Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 42:29Speaker 04

  Yeah. It's like a Captain Nemo meets Rick Rubin meets...

• 42:33Conan O'Brien?

  Meets Zeus, but also meets like-

• 42:36Speaker 04

  Touch of Manson.

• 42:37Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, a little bit of Manson, just a little touch. You want a little touch of Mancin.

• 42:41Speaker 04

  Yeah, and it, and all of a sudden, it just happened. Like, I remember seeing pictures of Jack and he had, oh yeah, no, he has a beard and oh, it's cool. It's like a little gray there. And then I think, I don't know, six months later, I saw a picture of years ago. I was like, whoa.

• 42:56Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 42:56Speaker 04

  Um, and he couldn't keep that version for the movie. And I thought, oh, that must be really upsetting when you have that and then to have to shave it.

• 43:07Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, that's what I thought is, I'm hoping that he has kept it. Meaning, I hope they didn't shave it. I hope it was detached from his face and then can be surgically put back.

• 43:17Speaker 04

  Or studied in a lab.

• 43:18Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah. Even if it means that it's terrible pain in a recovery period. And maybe the body rejects it for some reason because it's been off the face. I still think it's worth trying to keep-

• 43:28Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 43:30Conan O'Brien?

  And then he does it. It's like, we, the world lost Jack Black today. After unsuccessful beard reattachment surgery suggested by Conan O'Brien. On a podcast with Paul Rudd, the two men have been arrested.

• 43:43Speaker 04

  They're still working on it, but unsurprisingly, government has cut off funding now for research on-

• 43:50Conan O'Brien?

  RFK Junior did approve of the surgery.

• 43:55Speaker 04

  It's a real shame. Well, to have such a signature, look, Conan, one, you're great. And if I had legs, I'd kick you.

• 44:02Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, thank you.

• 44:03Speaker 04

  Uh, I loved it. Loved the movie. Not an easy watch. That is like-

• 44:06Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, that is, it's an intense movie.

• 44:08Speaker 04

  And, um, but it was also like, you have, your hair is so kind of styled and it, how did you feel about showing up with a different hairstyle?

• 44:17Conan O'Brien?

  Well, um, you know, I play this therapist to Rose Byrne and there were so many things when they sent me the script and I, I don't, this is not a part of my career that I've had any plans for, and it's not something that I probably intend to repeat. But I really love the script. I love the director. And then, like everyone else on the planet, I worship at the altar of Rose Byrne. I just think she's spectacular.

• 44:42Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 44:42Conan O'Brien?

  So the chance to be in these scenes with her was like, you've got to do this. And the way I interpreted this therapist was, oh, he's the opposite of me in so many ways. He's not a caretaker. If someone's uncomfortable, he doesn't really notice. He just wants them out of the room. And then I thought, and I was talking to the director, Mary Bronstein a lot, and she said, yeah, what do we do about the hair? And we both agreed it should just be pulled back and down and just kill this thing.

• 45:14Speaker 04

  No.

• 45:15Conan O'Brien?

  Just kill it with weights and restraints. But no, it was mostly just wet it down.

• 45:23Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 45:23Conan O'Brien?

  And put some stuff in there to just keep it flat. And then, so yeah, it is funny because it felt like I don't have my, it's like Superman without his cape. You know, it's just like, it felt to me a little bit like, well, this guy's no fun. He's got.

• 45:38Speaker 04

  Yeah, you're all put together and kind of tightly. Did you find though that when you were doing it, you're not self-conscious about any of that kind of stuff? That some of those things that you do feel like, oh, this really I am acting a part and that.

• 45:53Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I did a lot of prep, which I have so much respect. I've always respected what you guys do, actors. It is not really my thing. I can, I think I'm a good actor when, when it's a sketch. When I have to do something in a sketch, I feel like, oh, I can do that. But this character work and all that was new to me. I had never done it before, but I worked with someone and really tried to understand who this person was. And so that when I showed up on set, know your lines, know what you're supposed to do, and really be familiar with this person. So not a person I'd want to be all the time.

• 46:32Speaker 04

  Right.

• 46:33Conan O'Brien?

  But.

• 46:34Speaker 04

  Well, you were great in it, but do you want to, you don't want to keep doing it? Or you think?

• 46:38Conan O'Brien?

  I just don't think it's something, I don't see me saying, get me out there, you know? I.

• 46:44Speaker 04

  I always ask, because pilot season is coming up.

• 46:48Conan O'Brien?

  I'm doing all this, oh, I couldn't possibly, and then you're gonna, you're gonna see my new show. Hanging with Conan.

• 46:56Conan O'Brien?

  Father of seven kids. You know, whatever, I don't know what it is.

• 47:02Conan O'Brien?

  But, uh, no, I don't, I do think this will be something I'll be doing a lot more of. But I am in Toy Story 5.

• 47:09Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 47:10Conan O'Brien?

  Check that out, yeah.

• 47:12Speaker 04

  Uh, playing?

• 47:13Conan O'Brien?

  I, um.

• 47:13Speaker 04

  Are you allowed to say?

• 47:14Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I play, I think it's out there, I think I'm allowed to say. I play Smarty Pants. A, uh, one of those devices for like, one and a half year olds that teaches them how to go to the bathroom. And, uh, so I'm a little toy that teaches kids how to go to the bathroom. I'm Smarty Pants. And I went to college, and...

• 47:35Speaker 04

  Have you done it already? Have you recorded it?

• 47:37Conan O'Brien?

  I just wrapped, like, two days ago.

• 47:39Speaker 04

  Oh, wow.

• 47:39Conan O'Brien?

  I wrapped on the Disney lot, uh, and it's one of the more surreal experiences in my life to be having the, wearing the cans when you're doing the lines. I mean, these things are so familiar to you, they're not to me, and, uh, hearing, they're not in the sessions with me, but hearing, you know, uh, Tom Hanks as Woody. You know, and hearing Woody and Buzz in my ear, and I'm supposed to go like, "Yeah, guys," or whatever, I just, I can't believe that.

• 48:10Speaker 04

  It's crazy, isn't it?

• 48:11Conan O'Brien?

  It's crazy.

• 48:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 48:11Conan O'Brien?

  It's crazy to hear them.

• 48:13Speaker 04

  Moments where you can actually get emotional about it, because you, especially Toy Story and those characters.

• 48:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. They're so good, they're so good.

• 48:21Speaker 04

  So good, it really, uh, I remember after the third one came out, I thought, is this, is this the greatest trilogy?

• 48:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 48:30Speaker 04

  You know, I mean, Lord of the Rings, uh, you know, Godfather, obviously, I wanted two greatest movie.

• 48:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 48:36Speaker 04

  Rambo. Rambo?

• 48:38Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 48:38Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 48:40Speaker 04

  Yeah. The first, the first three Ernests.

• 48:49Conan O'Brien?

  The first nine, Herbie and the Love Bugs, uh, flawless.

• 48:54Conan O'Brien?

  No, I, I...

• 48:55Speaker 04

  I'm a weird guy. I hated, hated Bad News Bears, loved Breaking Training.

• 49:02Speaker 04

  And when they went to Japan.

• 49:03Conan O'Brien?

  That's unusual.

• 49:05Speaker 04

  Totally, I know, I know.

• 49:06Conan O'Brien?

  I know.

• 49:08Speaker 04

  It's an unorthodox take.

• 49:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, but stick with it.

• 49:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 49:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I, uh, I think those Toy Story movies are such, I mean, it's beautiful storytelling, they really are, and they, they've been showing me, you know, they'll say like, hey Conan, do you wanna see, they've shown me now little pieces of it in, uh, you know, that they've kind of are finishing up and, um, it's really nice because my assistant, David Hopping, grew up on these movies and loves them, so he comes to the records with me.

• 49:41Speaker 04

  Oh wow, he must be.

• 49:42Conan O'Brien?

  And, um, I don't let him see anything. I want him to be near it, but not to see it.

• 49:47Speaker 04

  Right, yeah.

• 49:48Conan O'Brien?

  And they say.

• 49:48Speaker 04

  A little dangling a carrot in a way.

• 49:50Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and they'll, they say, like, the director will say, do you wanna bring David in? Uh, and I'll say, only if he wears this bucket over his head. So he can't see anything.

• 50:01Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 50:01Conan O'Brien?

  And, and I paint a frowny face on the bucket. Uh, no, I, I, he comes in and he's, he's, so I get to experience that through him too, which is, these, uh, these scenes are just spectacular.

• 50:13Speaker 04

  They take so long to make, they have to be really well-written, they, uh, appeal to all ages. They're the best movies.

• 50:20Conan O'Brien?

  I like that you're now promoting Toy Story 5. I've tricked you and not Anaconda. You're promoting all the Anchorman films.

• 50:28Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 50:29Conan O'Brien?

  Anaconda, uh, and, uh, no, no, not Anaconda so much.

• 50:33Speaker 04

  Sony will be furious, they will, they, because they, as you know, they really insist, uh, that we promote the films that were actually there to promote.

• 50:42Conan O'Brien?

  That old weird.

• 50:43Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, they don't like.

• 50:44Conan O'Brien?

  Tick they have.

• 50:45Speaker 04

  I know, I know. Which, uh, does bring me back to my, uh, clip of the film where I'm talking about, um...

• 50:54Speaker 04

  How I Got the Rights.

• 50:55Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, you have this?

• 50:57Speaker 04

  I do.

• 50:57Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 50:58Speaker 04

  And it is very, it's, it's, it's actually based weirdly on a true thing like this. How the right, Anaconda was a book originally.

• 51:09Conan O'Brien?

  Is that true?

• 51:10Speaker 04

  It was.

• 51:11Conan O'Brien?

  Didn't know that.

• 51:12Speaker 04

  Truly, and, and, and it was, and the, it was, I think the author was Japanese, maybe? Anyway, there's this sequence where I talk about how I met his widow and she was a fan because I play an actor as well in the film.

• 51:29Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 51:30Speaker 04

  But I'm trying to explain to my friends how it is that I've come about getting the rights to Anaconda. They don't believe me and I'm saying, no, this is how. But I did, I, I know you haven't seen the link, but I, I don't know if there's any capabilities.

• 51:44Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I think they say they have, uh, yeah.

• 51:47Speaker 04

  Great.

• 52:01Conan O'Brien?

  Just always.

• 52:08Speaker 04

  Now you can see, uh,

• 52:13Speaker 04

  what else is on YouTube?

• 52:15Conan O'Brien?

  Now, here's my question for you.

• 52:17Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 52:19Conan O'Brien?

  Is there a part of you that just hates yourself when you're doing the fake setup now? When you do the fake setup now and you know, I didn't know, but the minute you started to say, I have a clip, I'm like,

• 52:29Speaker 04

  Of course.

• 52:29Conan O'Brien?

  Fuck you. We all know. And then there's a bunch of things that go through my head, but is there a part of you that hates yourself as you're doing it? Or no?

• 52:36Speaker 04

  Oh God, are you kidding me? Absolutely. Hate it when I'm setting it up, hate it when I'm sitting watching, hating at the, now at the point where it's like, how are we all supposed to react to this? At what year did I stop pretending like it was really?

• 52:51Conan O'Brien?

  You don't even try.

• 52:52Speaker 04

  I don't even try anymore.

• 52:53Conan O'Brien?

  This is the least you've tried ever. You went, oh yeah, and I have a clip. Cause it was a book and then Spain and then.

• 53:00Speaker 04

  I'll be honest, I do, I put very little thought in how I was gonna do it this time.

• 53:03Conan O'Brien?

  You're kind of looking around like, yeah, blah, blah. You almost said blah, blah, blah.

• 53:07Speaker 06

  Will you ever turn down coming on the show because you just don't want to deal with this anymore?

• 53:11Speaker 04

  Yeah, exactly right. It's a little bit, yeah, when you, uh,

• 53:16Speaker 04

  You just get lazy and tired. Alright, I'll think of a setup now. Yeah. You know, it's like a team that wins a title and the next season they go where they were two victories all year. They're 0 and 2 and 14.

• 53:30Conan O'Brien?

  It's like, it's uh...

• 53:31Speaker 04

  Get back to fundamentals, guys.

• 53:35Conan O'Brien?

  It's I Love Lucy, the final season when they're up in Connecticut.

• 53:39Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 53:46Conan O'Brien?

  But you know what I love? The uh, I'm now starting to picture, at one point, um, one of us, we're gonna be very old men. Uh, and I'm older than you, so I'll be the older, so I think I'll be in the hospital and you'll be visiting me. And uh, I won't have long and they'll say I'm in a lot of pain, but he's, he's pretty good right now. And you'll come in to say hi, and I know you're gonna do a thing where I'm kinda in and out, but I'm there and I'm so happy to see you. And then you're gonna say, "No, no, and I just got good news from your doctor and..." And I'm like, "Really, really?" And he's like, "No, they did a scan and they actually can't find any of the disease in the area." And I'm, "Really? Yeah, no, take a look at the scan." And it's gonna be that.

• 54:25Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 54:25Conan O'Brien?

  And um, and it's gonna make me really happy.

• 54:30Speaker 04

  I'm so touched. I, I, I...

• 54:32Conan O'Brien?

  That's gonna make me...

• 54:33Speaker 04

  That, by the way, is, is a really great way to do it, cuz you have the ex, the lit, the box lit up on the wall. This is a great... I've thought out other scenarios, but that's way better.

• 54:46Conan O'Brien?

  But you know what you're gonna do? You're gonna get a guy, you're gonna get my doctor to play along. And so he's gonna say, "No, we found, and, and, and Paul, do you mind, and I'll, do you, do you wanna stick around for this?" And I'll be like, "It's okay, I want Paul here." And you'll be like, "Okay, I'll stick around for him." And then he'll be showing me, and then at some point, because I hope this is not for a long time, I'm just gonna say that. But it's gonna be some sophisticated scan where they show you in real time, "This is where we, we did the scan and you can see here, and this is where the disease was." And then it's gonna start to flicker a little bit and it's gonna turn into...

• 55:18Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 55:19Conan O'Brien?

  And um, it's gonna bring me a lot of joy, and then I'll pass away. It's great.

• 55:24Speaker 04

  I'm just happy that I could bring that to you in your final moments.

• 55:28Conan O'Brien?

  I did think of a scenario where we could do this and I don't want to reveal it here. I did think of a scenario which I think is the

• 55:36Conan O'Brien?

  would be momentous and I'm hoping we get to do it someday.

• 55:39Speaker 04

  No, no, no, you'll tell me, you'll tell me afterward.

• 55:42Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, there is a way to do this that would be the greatest, but I will figure that out. I have a wonderful memory of, I remember we, I was in Brooklyn and I did a show there and you were kind enough to come do it for the podcast.

• 55:56Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 55:57Conan O'Brien?

  And we were all there and then you and I hung out afterwards. Some drinks were had, as I recall. Uh, and then we, uh, we ended up, it was very late at night and we ended up, uh, stepping into your house at night. I remember that and you showing me around in the dark.

• 56:16Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 56:16Conan O'Brien?

  And I was like, shh, shh, shh, I think my children are asleep.

• 56:20Speaker 04

  Are you sure this was his house?

• 56:22Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I'm not sure, cause we-

• 56:24Speaker 04

  I'm not sure.

• 56:25Conan O'Brien?

  We're not sure. We weren't in the best state, but we had had a really good time and we're, we're walking around. And you're showing me this and I was just so happy to be in your house, but it was a very, it's such a clear memory of you and me in the dark. This is just a couple of years ago and you're, you're doing a thing that they do in movies where you're like, shh, we're both a little buzzed, you're like, shh, and I'm like,

• 56:47Conan O'Brien?

  yeah. And we're looking around and I'm like, this is beautiful. And you're like, yeah, shh, quiet, quiet. And, uh, but it was so surreal to walk around with you, one of my favorite people in this gorgeous house and I remember thinking, oh my God, I miss New York. That was the feeling I had. I mean, I love, don't get me wrong, I love Los Angeles, but you've made it a point to always have that be your base.

• 57:09Speaker 04

  Always, but I was so, uh, thrilled that we got to hang out and then I'm like, wow, you're gonna, yeah, come on over. Like, are you sure it's 2:00 AM? Yeah. Yeah, it's fine. Um, no, whatever it was, but I was so happy that we got to kind of hang out and spend a little time.

• 57:23Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, it was really lovely, yeah.

• 57:24Speaker 04

  Yeah, and I do remember this and as you were describing it, I was thinking, I'm just miss, missing the, uh, you know, like the, the candle with the holder, the, like, kind of Jacob Marley.

• 57:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 57:35Speaker 04

  Right, okay, this way, this way, this way.

• 57:38Conan O'Brien?

  Yes. And I'm like, yeah.

• 57:40Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 57:43Conan O'Brien?

  What do you want to drink?

• 57:48Conan O'Brien?

  It was really fun. It was really fun, but.

• 57:51Speaker 04

  Well, we have to do it again. Next time you're, you know, you're back in New York.

• 57:54Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I'll be back and we'll hang. You are an absolute delight. You're one of my favorite people in the world. One of my favorite performers and you always make me happy. And I know that in the next week, I'll be watching clips of you. Will just be appearing because I know these phones listen to you. They know what you like and it just is always throwing me these Paul Rudd fastballs. And I'm like, I know that guy. God, he's funny. Anyway, it always makes me really delighted. So.

• 58:25Speaker 04

  I feel the same about you, Conan. Thank you for saying that. Have you, about the phones listening, I had this memory of, did you see the Pete Holmes special? I think it was, I'm not for everyone, I think it was. It was his last one.

• 58:36Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I've seen him.

• 58:38Speaker 04

  When he's just, when he's telling the audience, he just stops in the middle of his routine and just starts saying, I want to buy a dildo. I want to buy a big dildo. People are laughing and he's telling them to shush and he just keeps saying it over and over again. I want a big juicy dildo, like whatever.

• 59:00Speaker 04

  For a minute and you don't really know where it's going. And then he just says, can't wait to see what pop up ads you all get.

• 59:08Conan O'Brien?

  That's such a great idea.

• 59:10Speaker 04

  Brilliant idea.

• 59:11Conan O'Brien?

  Pete Holmes, very funny man.

• 59:13Speaker 04

  Very funny. Yeah.

• 59:15Conan O'Brien?

  Hilarious.

• 59:15Speaker 04

  Well, now we're all gonna get those.

• 59:17Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, yeah. And anyone listening right now is gonna get one.

• 59:21Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 59:21Conan O'Brien?

  And not just any dildo, a juicy dildo.

• 59:24Speaker 04

  Juicy dildo. Yeah.

• 59:26Conan O'Brien?

  You know, when they're just ripe?

• 59:27Speaker 04

  Yeah, that's when you want to, no.

• 59:29Conan O'Brien?

  When you get the dildo, just put it in the sun for one day.

• 59:35Conan O'Brien?

  I hate biting into a dildo. And I'm like, oh, this isn't ready.

• 59:40Speaker 04

  It's a little bit like an avocado or cantaloupe. You gotta squeeze it to make sure it gives, has enough of that give.

• 59:45Conan O'Brien?

  Well, that's the thing is when I'm buying dildos, people are always like, what are you squeezing them for, you pervert? And I'm like, I'm trying to see if it's juicy yet. And they get all freaked out.

• 59:54Speaker 04

  But it's a giant bin of them. Stop touching all the dildos.

• 1:00:01Conan O'Brien?

  My grandfather was a dildo farmer. And he told me, "If you want a juicy one, you gotta squeeze everyone in the bin."

• 1:00:08Speaker 04

  He showed me, when I was a little boy...

• 1:00:16Speaker 04

  The right way to pick out your dildo.

• 1:00:19Conan O'Brien?

  And those bastards, they chased him out of town. Uh, Paul Rudd, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart, seriously. Thank you, Colin.

• 1:00:35Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 1:00:37Speaker 03

  Yeah, I love awards.

• 1:00:38Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 1:00:52Speaker 03

  Nice.

• 1:00:52Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 1:01:01Speaker 03

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 1:01:05Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5 N, which I love. Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 1:01:24Speaker 03

  Hello!

• 1:01:25Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty, it's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View US News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

• 1:02:00Conan O'Brien?

  Did you know that one in four Americans targeted by scams end up falling for them?

• 1:02:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:02:04Conan O'Brien?

  You fell for one.

• 1:02:05Speaker 03

  I fell for a scam.

• 1:02:06Conan O'Brien?

  Now, you didn't lose too much money, but you did lose.

• 1:02:08Speaker 03

  I did lose, and it was very inconvenient, and now they put protections on my account like I'm, uh, dumb.

• 1:02:14Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I don't know where they got that impression. Criminals are now using AI to make scams look more realistic than ever. In 2025, AI fraud spiked 1,210% and cost Americans $893 million. That's incredible. Well, with AI, it can get so smart now.

• 1:02:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:02:35Conan O'Brien?

  Do you know what I mean?

• 1:02:36Speaker 03

  Maybe I should start scamming.

• 1:02:37Conan O'Brien?

  No, that's not the point.

• 1:02:38Speaker 03

  Oh, no, that's not the point of this.

• 1:02:39Conan O'Brien?

  That's not the point.

• 1:02:40Speaker 03

  It's so much money.

• 1:02:41Conan O'Brien?

  One accidental click, Sona, can expose your information, putting you at risk of identity theft. Luckily, this is the point. Not that you should start scamming, but that everyone should get LifeLock.

• 1:02:50Speaker 03

  Right, right, right, right, right.

• 1:02:51Conan O'Brien?

  LifeLock has live US-based restoration specialists who will be with you every step of the way to fix your identity theft from first alert to full restoration. This is fantastic. How do you not have this?

• 1:03:03Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:03:03Conan O'Brien?

  If you have expenses or money stolen due to identity theft, you're backed by the million-dollar protection package with up to $3 million coverage in some plans. Join now and save up to 30% off your first year. Go to lifelock.com/conan. That's lifelock.com/conan to save 30%. Terms apply.

• 1:03:22Conan O'Brien?

  An extraordinary holiday starts at Paragold, the destination for a luxury home with the largest ever selection of Design's Best Brands. You want your place to look snazzy?

• 1:03:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03:31Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, Sona, you can use a little help in that department.

• 1:03:33Speaker 03

  Oh, come on.

• 1:03:34Conan O'Brien?

  Elevate the season with unique... Well, because you always put out just like, oh, you just hung up, uh, you know, acorn or something.

• 1:03:39Speaker 03

  Acorns are nice.

• 1:03:41Conan O'Brien?

  No, just one against a giant white wall. And a rusty nail. You want to elevate the season with unique heirloom, quality decor, gifts, hosting essentials, and more from Design's Best Brands for every celebration and style. Each piece is vetted for quality, beauty, and authenticity. They offer free, fast, full-service delivery on most items, so instantly your home can look classy for the holidays.

• 1:04:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:04:03Conan O'Brien?

  Shop in-store and online at paragold.com. Paragold: Luxury Lives Here.

• 1:04:16Speaker 06

  We have something that we have to show you. Do you remember that show Star Search from decades ago?

• 1:04:20Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:20Speaker 06

  So it's coming back, and I think there's something about the promo that you need to be made aware of.

• 1:04:25Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 1:04:27Speaker 04

  Star Search, the world's greatest talent competition.

• 1:04:32Speaker 04

  Welcome Beyonce,

• 1:04:35Speaker 04

  Kevin James, Usher, Raymond, Britney Spears. The show that launched the greatest stars of our time.

• 1:04:46Speaker 06

  Look up in the top right.

• 1:04:47Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:04:48Speaker 06

  It says Conan O'Brien.

• 1:04:50Conan O'Brien?

  Wait, is that real?

• 1:04:51Speaker 06

  It's real.

• 1:04:51Conan O'Brien?

  I don't get that.

• 1:04:52Speaker 07

  Our very own Ruthie shared this with me. I think Netflix put out a trailer for this Star Search reboot, and this is the trailer, and they are saying, all of these names they're implying were launched, their careers were launched by Star Search.

• 1:05:07Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 1:05:08Speaker 06

  Did you ever have anything to do with Star Search?

• 1:05:10Conan O'Brien?

  I did not. I was, no. That is, no. That is not my origin story. If it was, I would shout it to the rooftops. I wish I had been on Star Search. I'd have had at least a little more experience before I took over Late Night in 1993. No! I honestly, I, I, I am flabbergasted.

• 1:05:30Speaker 03

  What do we do?

• 1:05:31Speaker 07

  It does say greatest stars of our time, though, so aren't you, you know?

• 1:05:34Speaker 03

  I know, maybe you could just make it up.

• 1:05:37Conan O'Brien?

  Um.

• 1:05:38Speaker 06

  Did you do like they used to do dramatic monologues on there?

• 1:05:41Conan O'Brien?

  No, I never had any connection to.

• 1:05:43Speaker 06

  Maybe they want you on this season. They want to make a star out of you.

• 1:05:46Speaker 03

  Oh, this is it.

• 1:05:48Conan O'Brien?

  Does any, has anyone looked into this at all before we started talking about it?

• 1:05:51Speaker 03

  Did anyone Google Conan and Star Search?

• 1:05:53Speaker 07

  We asked around the office. I talked to Jeff. Jeff said he doesn't think that, he doesn't know, he doesn't get it.

• 1:05:57Conan O'Brien?

  No, I have, I mean, unless I've dangerously in need of neurosurgery, I have had no connection. I'm not upset at all.

• 1:06:06Speaker 06

  I want to get to the bottom.

• 1:06:07Speaker 03

  You're not upset?

• 1:06:09Conan O'Brien?

  No, not really.

• 1:06:10Speaker 03

  I'm upset for you.

• 1:06:11Conan O'Brien?

  Why?

• 1:06:11Speaker 03

  Cause they're just using your name, being like, "We launched his career." Doesn't that make you wanna like, cut a bitch?

• 1:06:17Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, no. I'm glad someone thinks that it's worth putting me in there.

• 1:06:23Speaker 06

  I want, I want them to answer for this. I want them to say what they think you did on Star Search, or for Star Search, you know?

• 1:06:29Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:06:29Conan O'Brien?

  Is it possible that on the old Late Night Show, we did a bit once about Star Search? And they're showing that or something? But that would be, that's false advertising.

• 1:06:39Speaker 06

  No, they're definitely making the case that all of these people got their start from Star Search.

• 1:06:43Conan O'Brien?

  Well, listen, here's another question I have. Who else then is being misrepresented in this ad?

• 1:06:48Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:06:49Conan O'Brien?

  Because if they're using my name, it must be, there must be some other people in there too.

• 1:06:54Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:06:54Conan O'Brien?

  It said Dave Chappelle. Was Dave Chappelle, maybe he was. Maybe he was on Star Search.

• 1:06:58Speaker 07

  Is that Adam Sandler? Was he on Star Search?

• 1:07:00Speaker 06

  These are all the folks, according to Google, right?

• 1:07:03Speaker 03

  Is Conan on there?

• 1:07:04Speaker 06

  Adam Sandler is on there.

• 1:07:06Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:07:06Conan O'Brien?

  I don't see...

• 1:07:08Speaker 03

  You're not on there.

• 1:07:09Conan O'Brien?

  No, I'm not on there.

• 1:07:10Speaker 03

  Nope.

• 1:07:11Conan O'Brien?

  Uh...

• 1:07:11Speaker 08

  Now, I don't wanna be a conspiracy theorist.

• 1:07:14Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:15Speaker 08

  But I'm just saying, what if the Netflix marketing people put you in there, knowing you weren't part of it, so they can get free publicity of you talking about it?

• 1:07:25Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:07:26Speaker 06

  That would be deep-seated.

• 1:07:28Speaker 08

  All I'm saying is, you know?

• 1:07:30Conan O'Brien?

  And we are talking about it right now.

• 1:07:31Speaker 08

  Are we playing right into their hands for exactly what they wanted by knowing?

• 1:07:36Speaker 06

  And now proving that we have played a part in Star Search, because here we are talking about it, and there is his name on the screen.

• 1:07:42Speaker 08

  Oh my god, it's some weird time travel.

• 1:07:43Conan O'Brien?

  Now, listen, I would be very impressed if that were the case. I don't tend to be a conspiracy theorist. I tend to think, no, there was a mistake somewhere, or, okay, um, the Mark Twain Prize was on Netflix, and I think it was a success for them.

• 1:07:59Speaker 08

  Right.

• 1:07:59Conan O'Brien?

  And maybe just the same program that's like feeding names in took my name from that. I, I, look, Sona, I don't understand how technology works, but I...

• 1:08:09Speaker 03

  I know. I think you're way too chill about this. I think we need to make this a bigger deal than it actually is.

• 1:08:14Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I don't think, are you angry on my behalf? Be honest.

• 1:08:16Speaker 06

  I'm curious on your behalf. I'm curious. I'm not gonna, as you say, cut a bitch.

• 1:08:20Speaker 03

  No, yeah, I think, I think some bitches need to be cut.

• 1:08:22Speaker 06

  How many bitches should be cut for this?

• 1:08:24Speaker 03

  I don't know how many bitches worked on this.

• 1:08:25Conan O'Brien?

  Is this a three bitch cut?

• 1:08:26Speaker 03

  I don't know. It could be, I don't know however many bitches were in the room need to be cut. We just go around cutting these bitches.

• 1:08:31Speaker 06

  What's the most amount of bitches been cut?

• 1:08:33Speaker 03

  I don't know. A lot of bitches be cut, if there's a lot of bitches be involved.

• 1:08:36Conan O'Brien?

  Be all the bitches cut simultaneously, or be bitches cut at intervals?

• 1:08:41Speaker 03

  You gotta cut the bitches simultaneously, because once one bitch sees the other bitch get cut, that bitch run.

• 1:08:46Speaker 06

  Every bitch be cut, or some bitch get away?

• 1:08:48Speaker 03

  No, all bitches be cut. Whoever bitch be involved, bitches be cut.

• 1:08:52Conan O'Brien?

  Be bitches in circle around Cutter? Be bitches in making one circle?

• 1:08:56Speaker 03

  You run and bitches be getting cut.

• 1:08:58Speaker 06

  What if Cutter a bitch?

• 1:09:01Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:01Speaker 03

  Cut, you cut Cutter.

• 1:09:02Speaker 06

  Bitch better cut bitch?

• 1:09:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, Cutter, you bitch, you cut, you bitch.

• 1:09:07Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, okay, yeah. You cut, you bitch.

• 1:09:09Speaker 03

  You cut, you bitch.

• 1:09:10Conan O'Brien?

  Bitch be cut, bitch be cut, you cut.

• 1:09:11Speaker 03

  Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:09:13Conan O'Brien?

  You cut, be bitch, yes. Okay, now that's all clear. So that clears it up for me.

• 1:09:20Conan O'Brien?

  I'm angry and I wanna cut a bitch.

• 1:09:21Speaker 03

  Yes, I'm just saying they're changing your origin story. Everybody, like, can look at this and say, oh, there is footage of Britney Spears, but then you see your name on here, and they're claiming you.

• 1:09:33Conan O'Brien?

  I have to say, looking at it, I am very intrigued. I'm not angry, but I'm just, I'm just, I mean, Adam, what do you think? Seriously? I'm seething.

• 1:09:43Speaker 07

  I wasn't offended. I'm kinda like you. I'm just like, this is kinda funny and interesting.

• 1:09:47Speaker 06

  I think I'm falling with Sona. They're taking some credit and almost saying, you're not a self-made man, which you are.

• 1:09:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:09:53Conan O'Brien?

  I think of people that went on Star Search as self-made.

• 1:09:56Speaker 07

  Me too. I think it's a discovery platform.

• 1:09:59Speaker 03

  You're self-made in different ways.

• 1:10:00Speaker 07

  It's a platform for getting discovered.

• 1:10:01Speaker 08

  I think he's a top villain here next to Beyonce. What are you?

• 1:10:03Speaker 03

  What would you have even done up there?

• 1:10:05Conan O'Brien?

  Hey, hey, if Beyonce, if it's good enough for Beyonce, it's good enough for me.

• 1:10:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, but what's your talent?

• 1:10:14Speaker 06

  Oh, no bitch gonna get cut.

• 1:10:16Conan O'Brien?

  I'm now, I'm very fond of this cut a bitch thing now. I'm intrigued by this whole theory of cutting a bitch.

• 1:10:23Speaker 06

  You better be careful.

• 1:10:24Conan O'Brien?

  What's your talent? I'm sure I went out and did some bits, and they were just as powerful and showstopping as Beyonce. Hello, fellows, and the assorted ladies.

• 1:10:34Speaker 03

  Ah, I don't know. I don't like this one bit.

• 1:10:37Speaker 08

  I hope he did a little song and dance, you know?

• 1:10:39Conan O'Brien?

  I'm very, uh, we gotta find out. We gotta find out. Oh, we got Nomad in here.

• 1:10:46Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:10:48Conan O'Brien?

  Bring him in.

• 1:10:49Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:10:49Conan O'Brien?

  Okay. Melmed, Melmed, Melmed, Melmed, Melmed. He and Deed and Doed and Deed and get around. Be a Melmed off the ground, be a Melmed get around. Little, little Melmed get around. I start singing Melmed's song to an unclearable song by litigious Paul McCartney.

• 1:11:09Speaker 06

  Oh, just brings us right back to the last time Melmed was on.

• 1:11:11Conan O'Brien?

  I know, I was gonna say, I think I did that on purpose.

• 1:11:14Speaker 06

  Okay, we're gonna, we're gonna bring David Melmed back in, who is our lawyer. You probably know him from past segments. He's wonderful, very handsome. And on a near episode or the next episode, we'll get to the bottom of this with him.

• 1:11:26Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, okay.

• 1:11:27Speaker 06

  Inappropriate, okay. All right.

• 1:11:30Speaker 06

  Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gourley. Produced by me, Matt Gorley. Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross, and Nick Liao. Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy.

• 1:11:50Speaker 06

  Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at siriusxm.com/conan. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

• 1:12:39Speaker 09

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• 1:13:08Speaker 01

  Pressure or not, you don't drop your standard. Clean cuts, tight installs, fastenings that hold. It's about what holds up when the job's done. And when the pressure hits, tight timelines, tough conditions, no room for rework, that's when your reputation shines. Pros know what good work looks like. You do the work, you carry the standard. And Hilti brings the tools, systems, and support built to back it up.