Pod Insights Change Wired Kill the ANTs! Automatic negative thoughts, and 4 practices to train a stronger mind that helps you win at life. Kill the ANTs! Automatic negative thoughts, and 4 practices to train a stronger mind that helps you win at life. Change Wired
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About this episode Your mind can build your best life or sabotage it with a thousand small excuses. Today we talk about why we “fall to the level of our thinking habits,” and how a single lazy mental loop can shrink your fitness, your relationships, your business, and your day-to-day joy. If you have ever thought, “I’ll start tomorrow,” or found yourself stuck in complaining even when life is objectively fine, this one is for you. We share a few real, relatable moments: the inner debate when the alarm goes of...
Transcript 0:09 Speaker 00 Hey guys and welcome back to another episode of Change Wired Podcast, a space where we dedicate our focus and attention to learning how to unlock more of our potential. One rep, 1%, one minute at a time. So we get to see, experience and expand what we are capable of, the life that we get to live and who we get to become and what we can create in this world. Today, guys, it's one of the fundamental episodes.
0:50 Speaker 00 Today, you're going to learn four practices to strengthen your mind, to give your mind a workout, to condition a better mind, a better mindset, better thinking, which will drive everything else in your life. Whether you are working on your fitness, on your relationship, on your business, on your health, on your eating habits, on your diet, on your showing up for your work or important people in your life, or just feeling good every single day. That all depends on a strong mind, a trained mind by default, guys.
1:36 Speaker 00 And it is true for every human being, your mind is a weak link. It will think negative thoughts, it will complain, it will make you lazy. And what's good, does it do into your life? Here you think, well, you know, laying on the couch isn't that bad, isn't. It steals every single potential, every single bit of potential out of you, your fitness, your relationship. When you allow yourself to be in a lazy space, your life shrinks. You get fatter, you start feeling lousy, everything, it's like life is being sucked out of you. Your mind can either create the best life you can possibly have, or it can kill every seed of potential in you.
2:22 Speaker 00 And it is your job to train your mind before you train your body, before you do anything else. Because that will direct your life and will define where your life is going to end up in all areas of your life.
2:38 Speaker 00 Let me share three stories, three people, three days, same conversation on social media and in real life.
2:48 Speaker 00 Somebody commented today on my LinkedIn post, Kathleen, her name was.
2:54 Speaker 00 "I love the idea," and the post was about how we fall to the level of our thinking habits. You know, there is this saying by Stoics, "We don't rise to the level of our expectations or aspirations, we fall to the level of our thinking, of our habits." Which I go a level deeper, we fall to the level of our thinking habits.
3:18 Speaker 00 So that was the post on my LinkedIn with some tools that you can use to train your mind, which we're going to talk about today. And then it's your job to figure out how to put them on your calendar, on your schedule. Like your life depends on it, because it absolutely does. Every single goal depends on how strong your mind is, how in control of your mind you are. So three people, three days, same conversation. Today's comment on my LinkedIn post about how we fall to the level of our thinking habits. So the comment, "I love the idea of treating our mindset with the same care we give our physical health.
4:04 Speaker 00 We spend so much time managing everyone else's expectations and demands that we sometimes forget to look after the thoughts we are carrying around ourselves.
4:13 Speaker 00 I've learned that a little more awareness of what we allow into our minds can change how we approach the whole day." And that's the whole idea, guys. How you manage your mind, how you choose to manage your mind, your headspace, can and will change how you approach the whole day. And that changes everything.
4:40 Speaker 00 Another post on LinkedIn from a friend of mine, Craig. The post was public, so I assume Craig doesn't mind for me sharing his name and his story. The conversation, "Craig and I met a climbing client's head here in Cape Town. And so last Friday, we do walks every Friday with a group of entrepreneurs here. And last Friday, we got to see each other again. And then he shared a post on LinkedIn, what happened in his mind and how he ended up showing up for the mountain instead of sleeping in." So part of the conversation that was posted on his LinkedIn.
5:24 Speaker 00 Conversation in Craig's head before the mountain. Alarm goes off. Craig, "Yes, it's Friday. Let's go for a hike." Head voice, "Are you crazy? It's 4:00 a.m., raining and cold." Craig, "You like the cold. Last week, you complained it was too hot." Head voice, "There were some other thoughts that I skipped, but then head voice at some point. Why are we feeling so queasy? It's never a good idea to push when you are not on form. There is always next week." Craig, "You're right. That came out of nowhere. That's a legit excuse, but no, it's another trap. Roll out now."
6:09 Speaker 00 Head voice, "Okay, cool. You win. I tried. Let's go."
6:14 Speaker 00 Craig had to win the fight in his head before he could show up for the mountain. The climb was the easy part.
6:23 Speaker 00 Just like a workout, guys, I often think when I show up on my workout, like I want the conversation about that in my head a long time ago. And now it became a habit, so the voice doesn't even have a chance. It never shows up in the morning. It's like, yeah, we get up, we do the exercise. There is no conversation. That died some time ago, because I developed better thinking habits. And just like any habit, once you condition it, it just becomes what you do. You don't even think about that, just like, I don't know, eating a piece of cake. Although I haven't had cake in a while, which also was a part of my mind training, not some, I don't know, disciplinary willpower.
7:07 Speaker 00 Anyhow, so today in the gym, I asked a friend, "How are you?" And he probably didn't think that I was really asking seriously that, you know, it's more like exchange, "How are you? I'm okay." But then I asked, like, "No, like, how are you really?" And then he shared, "You know, I lost my way a bit there. Just got stuck and complaining. And then I started to think to myself, like, what's going on here? What's using it? You aren't helping anything, anyone, not even yourself with this." So that was the friend's response. Three people, three days, same conversation, sort of. We need to talk, guys.
7:50 Speaker 00 We really need to talk about managing your headspace. Like your life depends on it. Because it absolutely does. The thoughts you let your mind to linger on, to focus on, to pay attention to, they can kill your day, no matter what good this life brings to you. You have the capacity to pour dirt all over this shiniest day. Like you have this capacity, you know this. It's hot, it's bad, it's cold, it's bad, it's warm, it's crowded, it's bad, no one's there, it's bad. Sound familiar?
8:25 Speaker 00 Your mind is kind of like your teeth. Don't train it, don't brush them, and they get stinky. You develop cavities, cavities of your mind. And those cavities will give you plenty of pain sooner than later.
8:43 Speaker 00 I started meditation when I was 13, guys. But only in the last couple of years, I can say I've done it every day consistently. Like morning cup of coffee, like half a liter of water, like movement.
8:58 Speaker 00 Every morning, I start with 15 minutes of Tony Robbins priming. You can Google it, it's available freely on YouTube, many different options. But it lasts 15 minutes, so find the one that is 15 minute long.
9:13 Speaker 00 For me, it's the most useful practice, being guided by Tony Robbins to gratitude, to what I want to create in the world, to how I want to feel, to show up, to what help I need to focus on to strengthen my spirit.
9:31 Speaker 00 And during the day, every time a thought shows up, that's bitter, complaining, judgy, fearful, disempowering or doubtful, I ask myself one question. After I do the Tony Robbins, don't forget that morning priming is not negotiable. That's where your mind gets conditioned, just like your body, just like your bicep.
9:54 Speaker 00 And again, every time during the day a thought show ups, that's bitter, complaining, judgy, fearful, disempowering, doubtful, I ask myself, is this useful?
10:07 Speaker 00 Angela, is this useful? Is it adding joy to your life, moving you towards your goals, helping you in any way? No, change the radio station.
10:20 Speaker 00 Sometimes it can sound like this in my head. Well, it's too hard, I don't want to do it. Sales content, lead generation, talking to strangers, getting rejected every day. It sucks. Is the thought useful, Angela? Do you want to build a thriving business? Isn't that your dream? To be a thought leader, a published author, a change agent, one of the best coaches in the world? Then being uncomfortable, working on things you don't like and aren't good yet. It's part of the journey, your journey, right? Your dream. And how about being grateful? You have all the resources these days to learn, to improve, to get better at your fingertips.
11:03 Speaker 00 Literally, your grandparents couldn't dream about that. The president of the US didn't have that. And you have this to improve, to build your life. You get to do the exact work you love, work on your dream. Isn't that a blessing?
11:21 Speaker 00 You're damn right it is.
11:24 Speaker 00 Somebody didn't treat you right? They're a bad person? Do you always treat everyone right? Really? We're all human. Nobody owes you nice. Everyone is allowed to have a bad day, a bad moment, be the person they choose to be or had to be. Not everything will go your way. Life does not owe you shit. The universe is a jungle.
11:50 Speaker 00 But guess what? There are still plenty of good people, good things, every single day. Still so many things to be grateful for. Life is pretty dope, even when it's a jungle. Open your eyes, girl, find something to laugh about.
12:06 Speaker 00 That's what sometimes I can hear in my own head. I had those conversations. Kill the ants. Automatic negative thoughts, we all have them. But what you're gonna do with them, that's up to you. Kill them, or they will kill your best life, your best self, your best relationship, your best business, your best body. Your mind has the power to create the life, the person in the mirror of your dreams, or to kill every seed of your potential for greatness. Right? It can go either way. And guess what? The choice is yours.
12:50 Speaker 00 Here are four practices that I'm gonna share with you right now, that I consider non-negotiable for training a strong mind. They're grounded in research from psychology and high performance. And guess what? Every successful person you admire, that I got to interview for my podcast and got to talk to in real life, every successful person you admire, do them, does them in some shape or form. Like brushing your teeth, every day. Practice number one, one, meditate. And it has nothing to do about emptying your mind, guys. It's a practice in controlling your attention. That's what it is. If you can't stay focused on one thing, like your breath, one thing of your choice,
13:35 Speaker 00 you need this training more, not less. And people say, well, I can't, you know, empty my mind or stop thinking. You don't need to stop thinking, but you need to learn how to control your focus and attention if you want to win in life, at life. If running feels really, really hard because you're out of shape, you need running more, not less, don't you think? So the same is meditation. If it's really, really bad, it means that's how out of shape your mind is. You need more. And you don't have time for that? Well, maybe you don't have time to live your best life.
14:08 Speaker 00 Practice number two, journal, to examine your mind. Before you can change your thoughts, you need to see your patterns. Write down what's in your headspace. Bring the invisible thing driving your life into the light. Make conscious what's been running in the background.
14:28 Speaker 00 It's the same in the gym, guys. Before you get in shape, you need to see how out of shape you are and what needs to improve. So journaling is like that. Bring to your awareness what's running in your subconscious. Otherwise, it's gonna be driving your life and you'll be wondering what the heck is happening. Practice number three, focus on what helps you feel better, do better, live better. When a thought arrives that makes you feel worse and doesn't move your life or your well-being forward, say, thank you, you can go now. What would be a more useful thought here? This isn't about being objective or figuring out the ultimate truth. It's about choosing where your energy goes. Where your focus goes, that's where your energy flows, Tony Robbins.
15:14 Speaker 00 It's about choosing where your energy goes, towards what makes you or your life better in some way. So focus, shifting your focus, that's the practice number three. Number four, design. Yesterday, I watched a video, short one, by Alex Hormozi, and it was about making decisions that allow you to, making decisions, creating conditions that allow you to win at life. And one of the most important things he mentioned, he said, "It is to put yourself in the conditions that help you win. People, places, things." People, places, things. Affirmations on the mirror, a vision board, social media accounts that inspire you.
16:00 Speaker 00 Surround yourself with what brings out the best in you. There's even a book right now out on that situated by Professor Angela Duckworth. It will give you the exercises, all the signs that you'll ever need.
16:15 Speaker 00 Surround yourself with what brings out the best in you, and you'll have almost no choice but to follow a better path. If you're going to start anywhere, those four practices, I recommend, highly recommend, starting with number four. Design of what's around you makes everything else easier to do consistently. I'd go even more specific, I'd start with the right people around you. Who's around you? Are those inspiring people for your fitness, for your relationships, for your business? Or do you allow yourself to surround yourself with whoever that doesn't inspire a damn betterness in you?
16:56 Speaker 00 So we're gonna recap our four steps in just a minute. But guys, do this for even a week and you won't recognize your inner life. It might scare you how different, how much better it actually gets.
17:11 Speaker 00 And soon you won't recognize what's around you, not just what's inside of you.
17:17 Speaker 00 I'm not saying it will be easy, but every goal you're chasing right now starts here. It starts in your head, in your headspace. So what does your mind training look like every day? Have you been skipping it and wondering why everything else keeps falling apart? Or you just can't get it right? It starts in your head. So do you have training to train a strong, directed, focused mind? It doesn't come by default. You got a training, just like your bicep. Before we recap, don't forget to share this podcast episode with any other person. If you are on an Apple device, please do review.
17:59 Speaker 00 Those really help to bring amazing guests to the podcast and bring this people, this podcast to more people, more strivers, more high performers, who, you know, it's a part of shaping your environment as well. When we listen to good things like this, it helps you to have a stronger mind that helps you to get everything else you want in life. So please do share, review, especially if you are on an Apple device. Help me to help a lot more people. I show up here consistently. So help me, guys, to bring this work to more people. So we all get to show up consistently for what matters to you.
18:43 Speaker 00 To recap, practice number one, meditate. Specifically figure out a practice to train controlling where your attention goes. Meditating, focusing on your breathing, breath works are good ways to do so. So number one, meditate in some shape or form. Number two, journal. You need to see your patterns, examine your mind, bring to consciousness, to conscious awareness, what's in your subconscious on the background, running your life. Number three, focus, learn to shift your focus. When your mind drifts to complaining or whatever else that is not that useful in your life,
19:28 Speaker 00 shift it to something more useful. Thank you, you can go now. What would be a better and more useful thought here? And number four, design. And again, I would start with design, specifically with people. Those people might be around you in real life, those people might be on your social media. Just check those accounts out. Every day I wake up, I go to Kiskini, the optimist guy on my Instagram. I listen to Tony Robbins, I listen to Alex Hormozi, I listen to Tim Ferriss. Like those guys are committed to winning, to shaping their best self, to living it every day. Who do you listen to? Right? Don't be surprised if your mind is like junkyard.
20:12 Speaker 00 If you listen to like anything and everyone, you're gonna get junkyard in your head. Don't be surprised, then your life reflects that. So be very careful who you surround yourself with in real life and online. Just be intentional about that. Thank you, guys, for tuning in. Thank you for listening. Now, go get some training, some mind training in. You have four steps, four practices, re-listen and put them on your calendar. Figure out how to put them into consistent practice, because every single goal, every single other goal depends on that. Your life depends on it.
20:55 Speaker 00 So if you don't want your life to be a random junkyard of things, of people and places, and then wondering like, why can't I get it right? Start with the mind, guys, and start with these four meta-practices. Thank you for tuning in, thank you for listening. And till next time, keep growing, keep training, the most important thing, your mind.
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