Pod Insights Change Wired 3 coaching questions to restart fading motivation. About this episode We explore how the questions we repeat shape our focus, emotions, and results, and how a small shift in wording can turn stuck energy into practical motivation. Drawing on coaching sessions and real-life experiments in fitness, business, and habit building, we show why your brain reliably hunts for whatever you ask it to find, even while you sleep, and how to use that fact to your advantage. We walk through a simple 3-question sequence that helps you get back on track with your...
Transcript 0:09 Speaker 00 Hello and welcome back to another episode of Change Wired Podcast. My name is Angela Sharina, I'm your host, I'm your partner in change, personal and collective transformation, your health and high performance executive coach, and just someone who's really passionate about human potential and learning, figuring out how to do this more effectively at scale, more consistently, so we all get to live as our best selves and by doing so, creating amazing world with
0:50 Speaker 00 this just awesome nature to it, astonishing ourselves at what we can accomplish. So this podcast is all about a learning, how to grow, how to change, how to consistently get closer and closer and closer to our potential, to our best selves. I want to start with a quote to today's podcast. I was thinking, how do I introduce more quotes? But before we begin, I'd like to invite you to subscribe, to share this podcast. If you've been listening to this podcast and finding value, please do share with one person, please do share one insight, mention this podcast, rate, review,
1:33 Speaker 00 one action that helps this podcast to reach more ears, so we all get to create more human potential in our world. And now back to our episode. Tony Robbins has this amazing quote, "The quality of your life is the quality of your questions." Just think about it, the quality of your life is the quality of your questions.
2:00 Speaker 00 If you start your day by asking yourself, "Well, why am I so unlucky? Why am I always feeling like crap? Why am I so unfit? Why am I so dumb? Why I can't figure it out? Why things never work out for me? Why does the... Do I always get myself into this situation? Why, why, why?" If you start your day asking yourself these questions, guess what could happen? Your mind will find answers. Your questions are like directives for your brain to get out there and explore the possible reasons or answers to these questions. But if instead, you ask yourself questions like,
2:43 Speaker 00 "Okay, I wanna get into the best shape of my life. If I were truly committed to doing so in the next year, let's say, what would I do? How would I set myself up for success? Would I do differently from what I do now? What does keep getting in my way? What do I keep putting in my way? If I were truly committed to do so, what... How would I start my day? How would I finish my day? What I will not allow into my day?" Another example: If I were to be a com... Absolutely committed to getting into the best financial and business shape of my life, what is... but would I do differently?
3:27 Speaker 00 What did I start doing today? How would I organize my calendar? What will I allow myself to do or not to do? What people will I meet more of, less of? What will I read more of, less of? Questions are very powerful in that way that they direct your mind, your attention in the direction where the question goes.
3:53 Speaker 00 And so if you do wanna develop a certain area of yourself, if you wanna change a certain area of yourself, or you wanna change things in the world, you gotta ask more questions about that. So this magic happens. Even when you're not actively asking these questions, your brain keeps working on the answers. You probably heard about these examples when people would be working or in some problem and, you know, consistently asking themselves questions, like, how do I figure out? How do I do this? And they would be battling with this dilemma or problems. And then when they go about their day or sometimes they wake up in a dream or in the morning
4:37 Speaker 00 and they're like, ah, I got the answer. Guess why that happens? Because your brain keeps working on the problems, on the questions that you state for yourself. And the more you do it, the more you repeat the same question or the same sequence of questions. So the more you inquire about certain area of your life or performance, the more of your resources the brain will dedicate to that. A good example, I'm doing a lot of experiment with advertising. And certain things didn't work yesterday. I'm like, wow, I'm wondering why that worked then, but not this time. And I was thinking about that, thinking about, thinking about that.
5:21 Speaker 00 And then I just went to bed. And I was still thinking about that going to the gym today. And no, I did not get the answer, but I was thinking about that and I talked to a friend about that. And then he started talking about something which he does online. And then all of a sudden, like, ah, that is the answer. And if I were not asking myself this question, that would never happen. So that's another power of the questions that you keep asking yourself. Because you keep talking about that, you keep thinking about that, and people will start giving you answers or also start telling you about that. So questions have this power,
6:05 Speaker 00 again, of attracting to you the answers that you need or the solutions to get to where you wanna go.
6:15 Speaker 00 There are three questions that I ask all of my coaching clients all the time. Whenever we are working on any change and we sometimes go through periods of not having it all figured out or being stuck or feeling some resistance, like my clients would say, yeah, I wanna do that. I wanna get fitter or I wanna improve my feedback giving skills or I wanna improve my communication skills or I wanna start feeling differently, more confident. We would talk about things and then we would together brainstorm a few practices. And then they wouldn't do it.
6:56 Speaker 00 And one of the things that I use this all the time is the sequence of these three questions to get through this resistance and that stuckness and get moving. What I ask is, okay, in regards to this area, like leadership fitness and confidence, are you where you wanna be? Like right now, are you where you wanna be mentally, physically, emotionally? And very often they would say that's something that we are working on. No, not really. Then the next question is, is what you're doing right now working for you? For where you wanna go? You just said it's not where you wanna be. So where do you wanna be?
7:41 Speaker 00 And is what you're doing right now working for it? Like the way you do things, is it working for that?
7:49 Speaker 00 And then the next question is, if not, what will you do differently? Because we all understand that in order to do things, to get different results, we need to do different things. So this sequence of questions helps the person help, might help you to reflect on the fact that, yeah, you know, I actually am not satisfied with how I have things, how things are. Okay, you're not satisfied with you, so. Is that what you're doing working for you then? You're like, no, it's not working because I am not satisfied where I am. Okay, well, if if that's not working, what will you do differently, right? Are you happy with where you are? Is what you're doing working for you? And if not, what will you do differently?
8:35 Speaker 00 And to sum it up or to make the active response or action taking muscles stronger so you get right into action, I would ask the next question is, okay, what's one action that you can take right now or as soon as we stop our session that will move you closer to where you wanna be? Right? Because we already just asked questions about you're not satisfied where you are. You know, you got things differently. So what's one thing that you can do to move towards the direction of your aspiration? So questions.
9:13 Speaker 00 Questions is the quality of our lives and the kind of questions we ask will define what our brain will work on and how we're gonna feel and what we end up doing differently. Right? You might meet a person just during your day and they might look at you, you know, in some maybe ambiguous way, like kind of weird, maybe positive, maybe not so positive, you're not sure. And so the question you ask is, oh, what's wrong with me that they looked at me that way? It's gonna create a completely different train of thought. If you were to ask, oh, I wonder what's on their mind, how's their day is going, they're looking kind of weird, maybe I can help. You see?
9:58 Speaker 00 That would create a completely different train of thought of action. And I think the mastery of self, one of the big pieces of that is noticing those questions that you routinely ask yourself. I don't know about you, but I very often would think Through these questions, somewhat subconsciously, and the only thing I would notice is the after effect, the feeling like, ah, you know, I'm not feeling that confident. But then again, once you notice the feeling, you might ask, well, why is that? And by asking and letting yourself sit with it, with the question, you might discover that, ah, I actually was thinking about that.
10:43 Speaker 00 And I was asking myself this question. And if you're not getting the right kind of solutions or answers in your life, in your business, in your fitness, in your relationships, you might ask yourself, what, what kind of questions am I asking myself on a regular basis? Maybe those are the wrong kind of questions. And that's why my brain gives me the wrong kind of solutions. So maybe it's time to redesign the questions and start asking them regularly, consciously, right? You might set up an alarm on your phone or snooze emails to yourself to get reminders on a regular basis about certain questions that you want to ask yourself more often in order to move a certain area of your life forward.
11:27 Speaker 00 So to sum up this episode, let's get back to the quote by Tony Robbins. The quality of your life is the quality of your questions. And so the question to you, to your listener, is what kind of questions do you need to start asking yourself in different areas of your life, where you want to create different results? What kind of questions do you need to start asking yourself to start getting different answers? And not only that, I always say that these questions, like some questions, but this specific sequence is the best way to boost your fading motivation for any kind of change. Are you where you wanna be? Like, not me, not the world.
12:12 Speaker 00 Are you where you wanna be?
12:16 Speaker 00 Is what you're doing working for you? And if not, what will you do differently? And then to get into action, what one action can I take today to get myself moving in the direction where I wanna go? So the quality of your life is the quality of your questions that you ask yourself consistently. And if it doesn't come naturally, naturally you don't have good questions. You can ask ChatGPT, you can borrow questions from people smarter than you when you really allow them to unveil their internal dialogue. And just try it out. Try for a week this experiment.
12:59 Speaker 00 Ask yourself on a regular basis, different kind of questions. You might borrow this three, four boosting your motivation every day. You might actually set up a sequence of emails. Send yourself literally seven emails or as many emails as you'd like. And set them up so you get them received every morning for the next week with those questions. Are you where you wanna be? Is what you're doing working for you? And if not, what can you do differently? So the quality of your life is the quality of your questions. Guys, hope this was useful and you already started brainstorming what kind of questions
13:42 Speaker 00 and when and how you can make it consistent? What kind of questions you can ask yourself to move your life, your business, your relationships, your fitness forward? So start asking better questions consistently and be blown away by the difference in results that that habit creates. Thank you guys for tuning in. Thank you for listening. Till next time, keep growing, keep changing, keep asking better questions. And till next time, get closer to your best self. Talk to you soon. Get wired for change.
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