Sex After the Honeymoon Stage

This week, Alex dives into what really happens to your sex life after the honeymoon stage, and how to navigate the slowdown. Then, Alex gets into what to do when a friend betrays you, surviving political fights with your family, and why heavy drinking can cover up incompatibility issues in a relationship. Plus, how to handle a judgmental mother-in-law, and when to drop the “I love you.” Enjoy!

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Alex Cooper?

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own and creating looks and spaces just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home, drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches, Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life. Ross makes fashion accessible to all with up to 20 to 60% off other retailers' prices on the brands you love. Find your nearest Ross at rossstores.com. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Uncrustables. Daddy gang knows there is no disappointment like reaching for an Uncrustable sandwich and then remembering you have to wait for it to thaw. To speed things up,

• 0:45Alex Cooper?

  there are all sorts of hacks like, you know, sitting on an Uncrustable sandwich so it thaws faster. But you don't have to wait for that pillowy soft bread anymore. You can now keep Uncrustables in your fridge so they're ready to eat the moment that craving strikes. No wait time. Find them in the freezer aisle today. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Pandora Jewelry. Make their holiday unforgettable with a gift that says it all from Pandora Jewelry. I feel like the best gifts are always the ones that feel really personal, right? Like, anyone can buy you something nice, but when someone gives you a gift that is actually meaningful, you appreciate it so much more. And that's what I do love about Pandora.

• 1:28Alex Cooper?

  They have so many pieces that you can really just make your own, from festive charms to personalized engravings and jewelry that can represent the people and the moments that mean the most to you. So whether you're shopping for your partner or your mom, your best friend, you can find something that really is specific to them. Maybe it's a charm that makes you think of the trip that you guys took together once, or maybe it's an engraving for your anniversary, or just a piece that feels like them the second you see it. Pandora makes it so easy to give a gift that feels thoughtful and personal and makes every holiday moment even more meaningful and special. Because at the end of the day, the best gifts aren't just about The piece itself, but it's the intention and the story behind them.

• 2:13Alex Cooper?

  Say more this holiday season with Pandora. Shop now at pandora.net or visit your closest Pandora store. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ashley. Okay, so whenever I am picking new furniture for my house or redesigning a room, it is so important to me to make sure that it also is cohesive with the rest of my house and the vibe that I'm feeling. And I think filling your home with beautiful durable pieces from Ashley will help you create a backdrop for growing family's biggest memories. Right? You want your home to feel cozy and you want it to feel like you. And thanks to features like stain resistant performance fabric, even the messiest memories will be easy to clean.

• 2:56Alex Cooper?

  So visit your local store or head to ashley.com to find your style. Daddy gang, welcome back to another Sunday session with me and Bruce. If you're watching this, Bruce has made an appearance. Henry's on the floor, but you can't see him. But both of the dogs are joining us because it's cozy and we need love today.

• 3:17Speaker 01

  Sunday morning, Father's Crying.

• 3:23Speaker 01

  Every Sunday's Father's Day.

• 3:29Alex Cooper?

  That was pretty good, right?

• 3:47Alex Cooper?

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own and creating looks and spaces just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home, drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches. Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life. Ross makes fashion accessible to all with up to 20 to 60% off other retailers' prices on the brands you love. Find your nearest Ross at rossstores.com. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Uncrustables. Daddy gang knows there is no disappointment like reaching for an Uncrustable sandwich and then remembering you have to wait for it to thaw.

• 4:31Alex Cooper?

  To speed things up, there are all sorts of hacks like, you know, sitting on an Uncrustable sandwich so it thaws faster, but you don't have to wait for that pillowy soft bread anymore. You can now keep Uncrustables in your fridge so they're ready to eat the moment that craving strikes. No wait time. Find them in the freezer aisle today. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by T-Mobile. Daddy gang, there are honestly so many reasons to just choose T-Mobile. They've got T-Mobile Tuesdays perks, tons of freebies, travel benefits like hotel and rental car savings. They make your phone plan feel like it's actually giving you something back instead of just being another bill that you have to pay every single month.

• 5:13Alex Cooper?

  And if you're a student, T-Mobile has student perks plans designed specifically for you. I remember being in college and constantly, literally just looking for ways to save money, understandably. And so, these are the kind of perks I would have absolutely taken advantage of. Students can get things like a $5 movie ticket every month, exclusive access to concerts, okay? And even streaming benefits so you can always have a reality TV binge night with your girls. And when you're already paying for your phone every month, getting all of these extra benefits on top of it, just, it makes sense, right? For all the reasons to choose T-Mobile, find yours at tmobile.com/membership.

• 5:57Alex Cooper?

  Qualifying plan required, visit tmobile.com. Little life update. I was on vacation on the East Coast and finally got to catch up with a couple friends I haven't seen in forever. One of them is married and the other is freshly in a new relationship. So of course, we were. Talking and asking all the classic questions of like, wait, okay, so how did you guys meet? What is he like? What does he do for a living? How's the sex? And the second that we asked about the sex, her eyes got wide and she was like, "You guys, the sex is so insane. We are fucking every day. We're doing every position you could think of. It's absolutely incredible."

• 6:41Alex Cooper?

  And later that night, as we all kept kind of hanging out and drinking wine, my married friend suddenly just kind of burst out and was like, "You guys, should I be having more sex? I think I'm having it maybe like once a week. Alex, how much do you have sex with Matt?" And I could see her start to kind of fully start spiraling and was comparing her married sex life to our friend who was literally in the middle of the honeymoon stage with a guy. But as we talked it through, it became really clear that my friend isn't unhappy in the state of her married sex life. She actually feels totally satisfied with the amount of sex that she's having and overall does feel really connected with her husband and fulfilled in their marriage.

• 7:24Alex Cooper?

  It was just hearing that someone else was on a completely different rhythm. It threw her off. And naturally, when you're comparing yourself to people, that is going to happen. And I think that's very relatable. I know it's easy to compare your sex life to someone else's. It's so common to hear about someone else's experience and immediately start wondering if they're the ones that are doing it right and you're doing it wrong. Because I feel like when you start dating someone, your sex life is going to look very different than it does in a year, in two years, and then 10 years plus down the line. And I want to normalize that and I think we need to start talking about it more, normalizing it.

• 8:05Alex Cooper?

  Um, and so I want to talk about what sex is actually like after the honeymoon stage ends. Matt's gonna watch this and be like, "What do you mean? We're, we're done with the honeymoon stage? No babe, I love you." But, you know, like, it's not like the first few months when you start dating a guy are so different than when it's been years down the line. In my opinion, because the truth is, the amount of sex that you have with your partner is most likely, it is going to decline once you settle into your relationship. I think that's a fact. And that has just been my experience through all of my relationships. And not only is that totally okay, it's actually extremely normal. Let me set the scene for a second today, okay?

• 8:49Alex Cooper?

  At the start of a new relationship, you and your partner are absolutely obsessed with each other, or you should be. And if you're not, then literally get out before it even, you waste any more time. Because you should be obsessed with each other. You have this fresh spark and it's making you guys feral. You're hooking up everywhere, kitchen counter, shower, Uber backseat. You literally can't get enough of each other. And then a few months in, things start to slow down a little bit. Maybe you aren't tearing each other's clothes off every single time you see each other. Maybe you fall asleep after dinner one night instead of hooking up. What a concept. Maybe you go a week without having sex because you're both just too busy. And the second that that shift happens, you may start spiraling.

• 9:35Alex Cooper?

  And you may start asking yourself, wait, is the spark gone? Are we not attracted to each other anymore? Is he not into me? Is she not into me? Is something wrong with our relationship? Because no one really talks about the slowdown. A slowdown is not the end of your relationship. In my opinion, it's actually a sign that you guys made it through the honeymoon stage. Right? Because as fun as that stage is, it's not real. It's a four to five month long, maybe a year. I'll give you guys a year. I don't want you guys in my DMs being like, no, my honeymoon stage lasted a year. Okay. Whenever the, eventually, that little love bubble, where everything feels fun and exciting and magical with a new person, it eventually bursts.

• 10:20Alex Cooper?

  And that time wasn't indicative of what your relationship with them is going to fully be like. Because in the honeymoon stage, your brain is in a non-stop dopamine rush. You are learning this person's world, you're falling in love with them. You're both only showing up kind of as the best versions of yourselves to each other. You are still shaving before a night out. I don't know the last time I shaved my legs before a fucking date night with Matt. I love you, Matt. Well, I'm shaving my vagina sometimes, sometimes, sometimes. Oh, my God, the beginning days, I'd be like, you wouldn't even catch me fucking slipping. That thing is going to be a seal. Nope, literally, nope.

• 11:03Alex Cooper?

  But you guys, you guys probably are still in the phase of like, you're buying cute and uncomfortable pajamas for sleepovers, right? You're maybe putting on a pound of fucking makeup just to say hi to him on FaceTime. Oh, my God, I remember I used to do that in New York City when I would FaceTime guys I started dating. I would like miss the call and I would quickly take bronzer to the cheek, to the cheek, to the forehead, overline the lips, put a gloss on, put the lights down to a good old like you almost can't see me. So you just see the outline features. And then I'm like, hey, babe, sorry, I was just like in the kitchen. What's up? Meanwhile, meanwhile, I just looked like a fucking ogre. But you want him to think you look cute. And so that phase is amazing, but when it comes to the sex that you're having at that point,

• 11:48Alex Cooper?

  you are still trying to put forth your best impression and your best effort when it comes to sex. You're discovering what turns this person on. You're figuring out how you can make them finish. You might be, you know, putting on a little show with the orgasm to make him feel good as we all have been there before. But then eventually you're supposed to leave your honeymoon fantasy land, right? And you're supposed to call your friends back who maybe you have been brushing off for weeks. You're supposed to find out that annoying fucking habit that your new partner has. And overall, you're just settling into reality. You're back to reality, okay?

• 12:29Alex Cooper?

  By this stage of dating, once you get out of there, everything isn't new and exciting anymore. You have probably had an argument, once the honeymoon stage is over, right? They have probably seen you hungover and greasy, which is great in hindsight. Like, it really is great because that's the real shit. That's life. You're no longer hiding the weird parts of yourself. And yet, you still want to be with each other, right? You're seeing these flaws now, and you're still like, "Okay, I actually still like you." And that's how you know this is becoming something real. And it's not just fueled by endorphins and this rush of endorphins that are taking over.

• 13:08Alex Cooper?

  And with this slowdown comes a really nice sense of comfort and peace around each other. You get to just now really be completely yourself. And sex suddenly isn't the main event every time you see each other, right? Maybe instead of hooking up one night, you just cuddle and watch a show. Or sometimes you'd rather just order some takeout and pass out bloated than have a sexy dinner date night. And it doesn't mean that you're not attracted to each other. It just means real life is a part of your relationship now. This is the part where people can get scared.

• 13:47Alex Cooper?

  And I get that because it may innately kind of feel like the spark is fading. You don't feel that frantic, like, rip your clothes right now off energy, like it's not present anymore. And I will be honest with you, there are weeks now where I have sex once. There are weeks where I don't have sex at all. And then there are weeks that I have sex three to four to five times a week. It literally just depends on what is going on in my life. And during really stressful periods of work for me, having an orgasm isn't top of mind. It just, it's actually kind of at the bottom. I, because I know, I'm like, I'm not even gonna be able to relax to even have an orgasm. Like, I always would joke to Matt, I'm like, "You can try. You can try."

• 14:32Alex Cooper?

  But I'm telling you, my clit is impenetrable right now. Like, my mind and my clit couldn't even connect if you fucking tried, but you could try. Like it's just not type of mind. That doesn't mean I've fallen out of love and that my relationship is doomed. It just means I'm human. Matt's human. Our lives can both get really busy and exhausting. So some weeks sex just isn't as big of a priority as other things and that is okay. Honestly, I think it makes our relationship that much stronger to know that the amount of sex that we have can ebb and flow and it doesn't have any impact on how we feel about each other. Because even in those low sex weeks, I never worry about how Matt and I are doing.

• 15:12Alex Cooper?

  And on the high sex weeks, like it's consistent in how we feel no matter what's going on with the sex flow. We're still showing up for each other in so many ways, whether it's venting to each other, cooking dinner, laying together on the couch, we are still connecting. And when you are building a life with someone daddy gang, of course, what happens in the bedroom is part of it. But it's just one of the many aspects to your overall relationship, I guess is what I'm trying to say. So my PSA today is that a dip in your sex life after the initial stages of dating and the honeymoon stage is completely normal.

• 15:54Alex Cooper?

  And while I want to normalize having less sex in moments after the honeymoon stage though, I do want to make sure I'm being clear that like, in no way, shape or form am I saying that you should ever stop prioritizing sex entirely. Absolutely not. That, in my opinion, is potentially a sign that there is a deeper issue going on in your relationship. Was this purely just a physical connection that burnt out? Right? Like, is there someone else in the picture? That's why it's not as big of a need. Is there something under the surface that's causing you guys to feel disconnected or withdrawn from each other? Are there things that you're personally, one of you is going through? Does one of you want it and the other doesn't? And is that building resentment? When you start to feel the intimacy disappearing,

• 16:40Alex Cooper?

  my advice would be I think it's time to sit down and have a conversation with your partner.

• 16:47Alex Cooper?

  Trust me, I know that the state of your sex life can be a very, it's kind of like hard, difficult conversation to bring up. I always go back to shout out Sex with Emily. Her advice is always timing, tone, and turf. If you want to bring up sex and your sex life to your partner, you are not bringing this up in the heat of an argument, daddy gang. You're not like, "Oh, and by the way, when's the last time you made me fucking come?" And he's like, "We're literally talking about your, my mother-in-law, and somehow, me going down on you is randomly getting thrown in there?" Like, no, no, no, we're not doing that. You also ideally aren't even bringing this up when you're in the bedroom. Like, he's like going to stick it in, and he's like, "Oh, by the way, like, you never fuck me anymore."

• 17:31Alex Cooper?

  And you're like, "Yeah, no, now I'm, my legs are closed. Like, go fuck yourself." Like, do not bring that shit up. You have to find a time where you are both in neutral ground. And then you need to try to come from a place of care and curiosity because if you roll in slinging accusations or throwing blame at them, they're just gonna get defensive and the conversation will go nowhere. Because again, this is a very intimate thing to discuss. Sex, it's like, egos can get hurt, people feel embarrassed, ashamed, there's a lot going on. So my advice is, if you want to initiate a conversation, you could maybe say something like, "Hey, I just wanted to have a check-in about our sex life.

• 18:15Alex Cooper?

  I wanted to check in how you're feeling. Do you still feel connected? Is there anything that's been on your mind that you wanted to share? Because I know it's hard to bring up, and if you're comfortable, I would also love to share some things that have been on my mind that I want to talk to you about." I feel like, and again, I know some of you are probably like, in your house cleaning right now, or you're at work, and you're like, "Alex, I know I need to have this conversation, but I actually would rather die than do that because it's so fucking awkward." Let me tell you this. Once a couple is able to have one open and honest conversation about sex and their sex

• 18:55Alex Cooper?

  life and how each side is feeling, it 100% I promise you will make it easier and it opens the floodgate. So it is not as awkward. The next time you want to have a check in, I'm not saying it's not going to ever be awkward again, but once you rip the Band-Aid off, there is this alleviation to this conversation and it allows you to be like this is, we talk about our family drama. We talk about our work stress. We talk about our friends stress. We talk about our sex life stress or not stress or things we want to try. Like, have you ever talked to your partner about like, hey, I really have wanted to try this thing. Like, if you feel like you can't talk to your partner like that, I think this is probably a good way to just ease the conversation in of just like, should we talk about our sex life? Like, how are

• 19:39Alex Cooper?

  you feeling? And I think my, the biggest emphasis of this will come when you live together and it becomes very easy to put sex on the back burner. It is more than exhilarating and fun to get ready for a date night when you don't live together. You're in your apartment, you do your full body shower, you like literally have never shaved your vagina cuter. You're like, honestly, it's some of my best work. You shave your legs, you shave your armpits, maybe even your mustache, like you go all in. Okay. You clip in the extensions, you pick out an outfit, a cute pair of underwear, matching underwear, oh, matching underwear, and you make a moment out

• 20:22Alex Cooper?

  of seeing your partner with the excitement that you're probably going to have sex that night. And when you're living together, it's not the easiest to go from cleaning or doing the dishes and then wanting to jump each other's bones 30 seconds later. That's why being intentional about discussing your sex life, in my opinion, as you progress in a long-term relationship is so imperative. It's so important. And I know this concept of like, scheduling sex can sound completely unsexy, but hear me out. I'm not saying you're literally putting in your Google Calendar like,

• 21:05Alex Cooper?

  "Sex with Jeremy tonight." Like, no, your coworkers don't need to see that after passing your desk. You don't need to see that because that's like weird pressure. God forbid you like, no, no. What I think is important is you need to set aside purposeful time when you're able to unwind with each other and just connect. Be intentional. Like Matt and I do this all the time, especially the crazier that our lives are getting. We'll be like, "Okay, Thursday night is our date night. We are doing full date night. It's all about us." Whether we go out, whether we stay home, no phones, and the flirting begins. Remember when I did that up? So you guys, foreplay begins at 7:00 a.m. in this household, okay?

• 21:49Alex Cooper?

  Matt knows, "Foreplay? What time?" Sometimes it'll be like 6:00 a.m. I'm like, "Oh, well, no, don't wake me up." But 7:00 a.m. foreplay begins because it's like, I don't, that is so important that throughout the entire day, you are like building up and you're flirting and you're having, you're texting or you're calling or whatever, is you're being thoughtful. I think that you need to make sure that these moments you make for yourselves, they're intimate. You have each other's undivided attention. It's quality time together, and that makes you want to have sex. Okay? I have had so many conversations with my friends where they're venting and they're frustrated

• 22:29Alex Cooper?

  because they get into bed at 10:00 p.m. exhausted from work, having barely had a chance to even have a conversation with their partner that day. And he just rolls over and he's like, "So should we have sex?" Okay, listen to me so clearly. I want to validate anyone that's that's happened to. I wouldn't want to have sex in that situation either. Like, no, no, I don't want to have sex with you. Oh, hi, nice to see you. How was your day? Like, no. So if that's kind of what you've gotten into in your relationship, again, I want to validate you that it is so normal to put it on the back burner because again, we don't talk about sex that much in our relationships. So if we're not talking about it, how are we working on it?

• 23:12Alex Cooper?

  Together. Like, you can't silently work on your sex life. To have sex, well, you could do it alone, but we don't want to do that alone. Okay, you want to come together. Okay, those are the perks of being in a relationship. You get to actually fuck each other. So you can't just have a silent fucking, oh, I wish and I wish and I wish and I wish you did this. You then have to take accountability and actually fucking say something. And if that's where you're at, I think you may need to reset the way that you and your partner are approaching sex. Are you leaving it at the very end of the to do list? Or are you being intentional about the way that you approach it? Right? Bottom line, sex is going to evolve after the honeymoon stage, and that is completely,

• 23:56Alex Cooper?

  completely normal. But all that matters that you and your partner are communicating and that you both feel satisfied where you end up. So, daddy gang, let's stop comparing our sex lives to what we think other couples are doing, what we see in movies, what we see people online saying. I can promise you, no couple is having mind blowing sex every single night. It is not happening. It is not fucking happening. People are tired. They're stressed. They're hungry. They're annoyed. They had a bad day at work. They have nights scrolling TikTok in bed next to each other.

• 24:34Alex Cooper?

  Okay, I do it too. But the goal isn't to stay in that early feral honeymoon bubble forever. That's not reality. But the goal is to build something that actually is going to work long term. And what has worked for me, and I, this is my last piece of advice on this, is

• 25:00Alex Cooper?

  Talk about it. Like Matt and I, even we make jokes together. When we have been had the craziest weeks of like week of work, we will be like, oh my God, like, I can't wait to see you this weekend, wink. And it's basically be like, I can't wait to fuck this weekend. I know I am acknowledging, I know that this work week, we have barely been able, we're like ships in the night right now. We hate that. Saturday, Saturday. Oh, we had a bunch of people invite us to a bunch of different dinners. Nope, we're not going to them. Saturday night, me and you. Yes, I'm picking out matching underwear and a bra. Yes, I'm going to shave myself. And guess what? Most of the time I'm doing it for myself. I'm not even doing it for Matt. Love you, Matt, but I'm not doing it for Matt anymore.

• 25:38Alex Cooper?

  Ladies, I think sometimes, and I'm not speaking for everyone, but like, I think a lot of times it can be hard to, I always say to Matt, I take more energy personally to like, get myself in a like sexy sexual zone. So I, I know for myself, like I have to get myself in the mood and do things for myself. So I feel sexy on top of Matt starting for a play at 7am where he's texting me nice things or it's a text. Okay. You don't have to spend any money to do this. All the flowers are always nice, guys. Like, it's fun to get flowers once in a while, but just doing intentional things that show you care about each other so that the chaos of the world and your life and finances and stress and rent and family shit,

• 26:23Alex Cooper?

  although it's all there, your sex life is also there and your intimacy, more importantly, I almost hate saying sex life. The intimacy of your relationship is constantly being nurtured and focused on and acknowledged. So I hope that was helpful if anyone was feeling like a little bit in a rut. I get it. I've been there. Um, you guys know, I always say this back in the day, you couldn't catch me fucking being like, oh, I'm not having that much sex right now. Call her daddy. I fuck 15 times a day. Like, that's literally just not true. It's just not the truth. So, please write in if you have any questions about this or want me to talk more about this topic and um, I love you guys. Go have an orgasm. All right, um, we are now going to get into some questions of the week.

• 27:08Alex Cooper?

  I'm not going to do my little natural intro today because as you can see, my gorgeous, gorgeous Bruce, um, is asleep, kind of, and whenever I do that, he kind of freaks out. So, hi, Brewy. Oh, my God, look at him. He's like, Mom, I don't want to go to France. I don't want to go to France. Questions of the motherfucking week. Let's go.

• 27:46Alex Cooper?

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own and creating looks and spaces just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches, Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life. Ross makes fashion accessible to all with up to 20 to 60% off other retailers' prices on the brands you love. Find your nearest Ross at rossstores.com. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ritual. We are learning so much about how the gut microbiome is key to our mental health, immunity,

• 28:28Alex Cooper?

  and of course digestion. And I just feel like I didn't know any of this until recently, which is a problem because this is literally everything that we do need to know to take care of ourselves. But did you know, because now I know, the gut microbiome shifts during pregnancy, ladies? And these shifts can impact mom and baby's health in pregnancy and postpartum. And that is why Ritual created NADAL Biotic, a specialized biotic with clinically studied strains for pregnancy and postpartum microbiome support to support digestive health, mood, vaginal health, and baby's immune health. I have been trying so hard to take care of myself during this pregnancy, and I think something that has been very helpful is

• 29:11Alex Cooper?

  Actually learning about the things that now I will carry, not only just during this pregnancy, but I will continue to take care of myself in a way that I really never have before. I think sometimes as women, we don't have the tools or we don't know what we're supposed to be doing. And so we sometimes just freeze and we don't do anything. And since having Ritual in my life, it has been so nice to have this daily ritual where I'm actually taking care of myself and my baby, which feels great. So whether you're pregnant, postpartum, or looking for everyday trusted daily gut support, get clinically studied biotics to support your gut health with Ritual. My listeners can save 25% off their first month at ritual.com/callherdaddy. That's ritual.com/callherdaddy for 25% off your first month.

• 29:55Alex Cooper?

  These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Okay, question one. Alex, I was diagnosed with an STD and I was freaking out. So I confided in two close friends at school. The only people I told. A couple of weeks ago, a guy at our school made a comment that made it very clear he knew about my diagnosis. And there's no way he would have unless one of them said something. Now I feel betrayed and humiliated. I trusted them with something so personal. And the thought of people talking about it behind my back makes me sick. I'm angry and spiraling, but I also don't know how to confront them without it blowing up my friendships or making the situation worse. What do I do?

• 30:37Alex Cooper?

  Whoa, okay. Oh my God, this like brings me back to college. College is ruthless, man. Like it is not for the weak. All right. My first point that I would want to make is actually how close is close? Because I feel like in college, as close as you have close friends, a lot of close friends are not still like, you actually still call your best friends from high school because those are like your ride or dies. Or you have that one person in college where you're best friends with. So my first kind of point would be like, really assess how close you are to these people when you're saying that. Because my worry for you is if it was a super close friend, one, they would probably never do that. But two, if they were...

• 31:18Alex Cooper?

  To do it, you could confront them in a way that is like we're building tour back to get to our relationship and I need to understand why you did this. If these are like close, but also kind of like close fake college party friends. I worry that if you go at them because there's two of them especially. It could become this situation where they almost retaliate and are butthurt where they're like fuck you for like confronting us like. No, we didn't fucking say anything and then they get mad at you and they almost then like spread it even more because the fact that these people. Were that fucking disgusting to spread this information that is so personal and so hurtful and scary for you. They're that's so fucked up. So before you confront them, my worry for you is.

• 32:03Alex Cooper?

  You may not get the answer you want out of it. And so I almost don't know if you confront them. If you do, I think you could be a little manipulative, which I hate to say, but college is when you are kind of toxic and manipulative. And I think I would almost go to them freaking out and be like, you guys. I am having a fucking panic attack. If you can bring up the tears, bring up the tears and be like. Johnny or what the fuck is the guy's name? Uh, some guy. Yeah. Johnny. It's not Johnny, but Johnny. Um, Johnny Carson came up to me. Isn't that a surfer? Johnny Carson came up to me and literally was talking about my STD and he was making jokes and I. Only obviously told you guys and I'm like freaking the fuck out like.

• 32:49Alex Cooper?

  How does he know? Like, do you think like, what do you think happened? But do it in like this innocent like, oh my God, like, what do you think happened way? And it will hopefully make them feel so fucking shit because you are almost giving them the benefit of the doubt of like. I know you guys would never say anything like, how do you think he found out? Blah, blah, blah, blah. And then hopefully they will never fucking do it again because you're coming and you're being earnest. I know some people may not agree with that advice, but like. I know college and I know girls and I lived it to the fullest extent and I had girls fuck me over in college and. You are not at a point in your life, a lot of times in college to have these like therapized. Healthy conversations. Some people are mature enough.

• 33:32Alex Cooper?

  But if these bitches actually fucking went and told your fucking deepest, darkest secret. Yeah, then they're probably not to be trusted. So yeah, I'm going to manipulate the fuck out of them. My other question before we kind of end this, though, is two more points I would have. Number one,

• 33:50Alex Cooper?

  there is a chance that they didn't say anything. And I do think they did, but I do want to say, you got the STD from someone, right? So my brain goes to, there were two people in this dynamic. Is there a world he said something? And I know you'd probably be like, well, no, because it's embarrassing for him because he gave it to me. Men are fucking insane in college and I also believe that there is a world he could be trying to get ahead of the narrative. Maybe he's acting like you gave it to him, right? So don't trust the piece of shit that gave you the STD. Also, don't know where he is. And then third, you could also go to Johnny Tsunami.

• 34:31Alex Cooper?

  Who did I say? Carson Daly? Jason K- Jason Kelsey? Johnny Carson. You could go to Johnny Carson and be like, hey, I promise you, I'm not going to tell anyone, but clearly I have like a mole in my life that is like telling my shit. Could you just tell me who told you about the STD? Because I am not going to say anything, but I do want to know so I can know who to trust. The moral of the story is college is a fucking cesspool. It is clicky. And I hate to say it, but when I look back at my time, like college is the perfect example of when women fuck women over to impress and get with guys. And

• 35:12Alex Cooper?

  half of the time, I don't even want to be judgmental, not about this STD situation, but about that because in college, it's all about social equity. It's all about social connections. It's all about the parties. It's about where you're going. It's about who gets invited. It's about the invite list. It's about the blah. It's about the dining hall and who's sitting with who. Like, it's so all about social. And so people get out of their fucking minds and they do dumb ass shit because fucking Johnny Carson was sitting next to her in her fucking Ecom class flirting. And then she made a joke about you because she thought it was funny. And maybe she isn't a horrible person in that moment. She just thought it would give her more fucking clout because Johnny would laugh at a fucking joke of hers

• 35:56Alex Cooper?

  because she's the dumbest fucking loser ass bitch and she has no comedy game. And sadly, you were just collateral. I hate to say it, but most of the time in college, that's what happened. So I am sorry, but protect yourself and anyone in college, just know you can find a friend or two, but you've got to find your people that you can actually trust in college. But I'm sorry you had to go through that, but guess what? You're never going to tell someone like that again, right? Lesson learned. Okay. Number two. Daddy, my brother is engaged. Congrats. And his fiance has completely different political views from the rest of our family. Ever since they got together, it feels like she's slowly brainwashing him. He used to be chill and open minded, and now every time we hang out, he's repeating her opinions,

• 36:41Alex Cooper?

  word for word. It's getting harder and harder to even talk to him without it turning into a debate. I feel like I'm losing my brother to her. Do I say something or just hope he eventually wakes up?

• 36:55Alex Cooper?

  Oh, this is so hard. Yeah, this is really hard, and I think I'm assuming everyone watching this show right now can almost relate to this in some capacity, right? Like, I think we've never seen our country more divided. And I think Thanksgiving, family holidays, work events, like when you bring a lot of people together, there's going to be people with a lot of differing opinions. And what you hope is people can just kind of be

• 37:24Alex Cooper?

  not even respectful, just like have the self-awareness and the like social

• 37:34Alex Cooper?

  decency to like, we don't need to get in to this while we're all here for like Christmas or a charity event or a nice dinner to celebrate this person's birthday. Like, that's not the time to talk about politics. So my advice to you would be, unfortunately, your brother is an adult. And I think when it comes to siblings, something that's really difficult is when you have to retrain your brain that we are no longer 10 anymore and I can't run into your room and curse at you and we're not in high school anymore, we're not even called, we're adults. You are engaged. Your brother may go on to have children and build his own family, right?

• 38:15Alex Cooper?

  So like, I get this is hurting you, but I do think you kind of can't change who he is becoming, especially that this is his fiance. I do think you could have a family conversation, though, and say, hey.

• 38:29Alex Cooper?

  I'm really having a hard time with names today. Hey, Beatrice.

• 38:38Alex Cooper?

  It's not a man name, is it? Hey, Bruce. Hey, Bruce. Um, I love when we have family dinners, but I just wanted to bring something up. I know that we all have different political opinions. I think that it would be really helpful in order for us all to enjoy ourselves is if we could all refrain from letting it get heated and political when we're just all catching up on like a Sunday dinner for family. And mom and dad and I and all of us, like, we promised that we won't bring these things up. And I just am wondering if you and Claudette could make sure that you also

• 39:21Alex Cooper?

  aren't shoving your psychotic beliefs down our throat as well. You know, don't say that, don't say that. Just say if you and Claudette could also like, um, respect that too, so that we can all enjoy ourselves. And if he's like, no, I want to talk about how, you know, you shouldn't have rights to your own body, like, yeah, it then it may drive a wedge between your family, but I do think if you show that like, we won't go there. Do you think you can do that? Take accountability yourself, right? Everyone has differing opinions and see what he says. The last thing I would say is what you could do is in order to protect your relationship is you really don't need to debate every single thing, right?

• 40:01Alex Cooper?

  I think that like, if you could find neutral ground to like, do things that you can enjoy together that don't bring up politics. I think that will allow you to maintain a relationship with your brother. I think sometimes it's best if there are political differences to just be patient, right? You can't lock him into a room and scream at him and try to convince him to come back to us. We miss you. It's like, he gone, girl. He's gone. And all you can do is just kind of set the boundary of politics at family dinners.

• 40:35Alex Cooper?

  Yeah, you're fucked. No, I'm just kidding. I'm sorry. It's just so fucked because it's like, there is no right answer. I think you're, you're gonna handle it the way you're gonna handle it. And then there's gonna be blow up dinners though. Trust me, I've had those like you're, there's gonna be blow up dinners and you just gotta try to not say heated, personal things in the moment, right? It's kinda like when people talk about religion too. It's like, can we not? But now religion is tied into politics and it's a whole thing. So it's all like, we're all fucked. Do you know what I mean? We have never been more fucked at this exact moment in time. Everything's downhill. Everything's off the rails. Everything's just like boom, boom, boom, fucked, fucked, fucked.

• 41:15Alex Cooper?

  And then again, we just kinda have to look for, do you guys remember the um, baby sun and Teletubbies? We gotta look for him in the sky to just be like, give us a sign that we're gonna be okay. And if you don't see it, well, just keep pushing through, it'll come. Yeah, I'm sorry. Fuck him and Claudette, honestly. Um, okay, next question. It's getting a little hot in here, so I apologize by getting a little loopy. Um, hi daddy, I'm 26. Bruce is like literally opening his legs to me. I'm sorry if you guys see me just like rubbing this foot. Oh my God, it kinda looks like it's a piece of my hair if you're watching this. Kinda cute, okay? Um, hi daddy, I'm 26 and in an almost three year relationship.

• 41:58Alex Cooper?

  We were heavy drinkers together, but seven months ago I decided to get sober because I saw us going down a dark path. My boyfriend told me he wasn't going to drink throughout the week to better himself, but I've caught him lying and hiding it four different times in four months, even lying to my face when I have literal proof. It's been hard to move past the broken trust, to believe he's going to be better like he says. How do I forgive and forget? Okay, well, sweetie, you don't forget. I mean, it's, you definitely don't forget.

• 42:27Alex Cooper?

  I think that there's a potential that a lot of pre-existing incompatibility issues may have been hidden by the heavy drinking. Like I think when you, it's like when people leave college together and then they don't work out and you ask them why and they're like, because we're just so different. But we were in this environment together in college that was so conducive to our relationship. We had the same friends. We like going to the same bar. We blah, blah, blah. Like it's very, it was very easy. I think when you have something like drinking that you can bond over that probably also alienates you from a good amount of people if you're going that hard. I think once one person retracts from the dynamic

• 43:11Alex Cooper?

  and starts to be like, I want to change, it just highlights not just the drinking, but all of the other things of like, whether it's, what is his work ethic and like, what are his goals and does he have a routine or is he becoming lazy because of the drinking? Is he inconsistent? And like, I don't know, but this is just something I think to assess. Is it the drinking? But then all of a sudden, the drinking is bringing on lying. That for me is an absolute full stop no in a relationship. Like I would leave a relationship if lying continued. It's one thing if there is a lie and the person is in a really bad situation because he, you know, maybe he's an alcoholic or he is going through this

• 43:54Alex Cooper?

  patch with drinking and he, you get caught once and then he's like, I'm never going to do it again. I thought you were going to judge. And then he never does it again. You're telling me that you caught him multiple times in a few months? That makes me really sad for you because I don't think that it's going to get better because he's getting caught and then he's continuing to do it. So whenever he's getting caught and he's doing this like pleading of sorrow for you, he's only sorry he got caught. He's not sorry that he did it. I do think there's a potential though, if you do love this person, he may have a drinking problem and

• 44:29Alex Cooper?

  The best thing maybe you could try to do, but again, this is so hard and I know there's probably people that have watched if you have dealt with an addict or you know, someone that uses. You can only try so hard to get them help and you can lead them there, but if they won't go, you also can't sacrifice your entire life to try to get this person help, right? So you've gotten yourself to a place where you feel good. I think you could ask him once more and kind of set some steps boundary wise that would work for you. And if he can't meet those expectations, you may need to take a break from this person to kind of force him to become independent on his own and take accountability for what he's doing and how he's living his life.

• 45:12Alex Cooper?

  He may call you in four months and be like, it losing you literally made me wake up and I went and I got help and I went to rehab. Whatever it be, but you can't drown yourself in trying to make this person become healthy. The fact that you are on this new part of your life, don't keep progressing for another person that's dragging you down.

• 45:33Alex Cooper?

  Fuck, I'm sorry though, because whether it's, you know, drinking or finances or affairs or family shit. Like when you get down the path of lying about something to your partner and hiding things and there's secrecy and there is a part of you that you are intentionally making sure they don't know about. That is the beginning of the end of the relationship. Because as a unit, you're supposed to know everything about each other. You're supposed to build each other up and you're supposed to, if, if anything, more importantly, be there for each other in the really hard moments. But you don't even know he's going through this because he's lying. Fuck, I'm sorry daddy, but you don't deserve to be lied to. No one does.

• 46:33Alex Cooper?

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Airbnb. Every year, my family takes a big trip together around the holidays. And right now, we're in the middle of planning it. So naturally, our family group chat has become everyone sending different homes that they found on Airbnb. And they're like, what about this one? What about this one? Because my family has a lot of opinions about what we need. Obviously, the house has to be big enough to fit all of us, especially now with the baby. My mom wants a huge kitchen because she is already planning out Christmas dinner. My sister wants to be close enough to town so she can walk around and she can explore all the different shops. And personally, I always love to have a really good hot tub.

• 47:18Alex Cooper?

  I feel like once November hits, everyone's either just like booking holiday travel or trying to coordinate where they're going to end up. And even though it's so fun, it can kind of be a lot. And that is why Airbnb has become my family's favorite way to travel. Everyone has different needs around the holidays, but Airbnb makes it easy to book a spot that kind of just checks all of your boxes. Having one place where everyone can hang and cook and slow down, it just makes the trip that much more special. So before the holiday rush really kicks in, find a place where everyone can actually gather, relax, and make memories together with Airbnb. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own, and creating looks and spaces

• 48:02Alex Cooper?

  just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home, drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches, Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life. Ross makes fashion accessible to all with up to 20 to 60% off other retailers' prices on the brands you love. Find your nearest Ross at rossstores.com. Next question. Hi Daddy. I don't know if I should kick one of my friends out of my wedding party. Drama. Sorry, that actually fucking sucks, but it's good for the podcast, so we're gonna help you though. Um, me being like, oh my god, girl, this is gonna be such a good question. I'm like, oh wait, fuck, sorry.

• 48:46Alex Cooper?

  Um, okay, we've been friends since we were 15. Okay, good context, childhood friends, and now I'm 25. I'm getting married at the end of the month. This past weekend, we went out for a combined bachelor bachelorette night. The whole night, she was rude to my fiance and his friends, and she kept pulling me away like she didn't want to be around them. Eventually, she took me outside and told me she doesn't like my fiance, and then I'm making the biggest mistake of my life. Now, I'm two weeks out from my wedding, and I don't want someone standing up with me who doesn't support my relationship. But I also feel guilty cutting her this late. What should I do? Girl, okay, whoa, fuck, that is, I'm sorry, that's really selfish of her to have done.

• 49:31Alex Cooper?

  First, um, piece of advice, you need to have a sober, calm conversation with her. And it seems like your bachelorette was a little bit ago. It doesn't matter, you're leading up to a wedding, you can still have this conversation with her, it's not too late for anything. I think you need to sit her down, and I think you first should basically be like, I wanted to have this conversation because this has been weighing on me, and I wanted to share with you that during my bachelorette, the bachelor bachelorette party, I was so hurt and honestly blindsided and taken aback at how intense and persistent um you were at the event to me,

• 50:16Alex Cooper?

  to pulling me aside and letting me know how you essentially didn't approve of me marrying my fiance. Number one, it hurt because that night was supposed to be so special for me and my fiance. And somehow you not only made it about you, but you made it so that I was incapable of enjoying it because of the negativity that you brought. You could have done this months prior, you could have done this even the day after. Not that that would have even been appropriate, but like to do it in the moment. It really created this just toxic environment that was not fun. Number two, I don't appreciate you coming to me with such

• 50:58Alex Cooper?

  intense and negative feelings about someone that I'm in a relationship. This isn't your relationship and you've never expressed concern before. So I guess before I kind of talk about more of how I'm feeling, I want to just give you the floor. Is there something I'm missing that you want to share with me as one of my closest friends? Has he cheated? Did you hear he was lying about something? Did something happen? Because I'm all ear, like I'm here, like I'm ears if something happened. And if she's just like, no, I just think like he's not right for you, blah, blah, blah, blah. Which is probably going to be the fucking case. I think you need to say, listen. Listen, Franny.

• 51:42Alex Cooper?

  Listen here, you little fucking shit. Um, don't say that. You're going to say, all right, well, listen, Franny. I have been, this has been weighing on me so much. And when I think about my wedding coming up, I need to be honest. I don't feel comfortable with you being in the wedding party anymore. Because of the way that you spoke about my fiance and me and how you feel about our relationship. And I'm not saying this is the end of our friendship or whatever, but like that day is supposed to be one of the most important days of my life. And I want to feel nothing that I did at the bachelorette party. And in order to feel that, I don't want to be up on the aisle and looking to my right

• 52:25Alex Cooper?

  and seeing you and wondering if you're judging or if you're, you know, feeling those feelings. I don't want to have that memory. I don't want to have that reminder of how you feel about my relationship. I don't want it. And so you're still invited to the wedding, but I think the one condition would be, I would just ask, you can come if you feel that you are able. To not bring and spread negativity to my wedding. And if you don't feel like you can do that, then I ask that you don't come. And maybe after the wedding, we can reconnect and have a follow up and we can try to work on our friendship.

• 53:04Alex Cooper?

  But I'm not willing to sacrifice my happiness and my day because of a feeling that you have about me and my relationship. Period. And drop mic, motherfucker. Bye.

• 53:17Alex Cooper?

  I just like, dude, when it comes to people's fucking weddings, let them have their fucking moment. When it's the bridezilla of the century, if she is being such a cunt, I get those are one offs where you're like, okay, this person's actually being like fucking insane to everyone. But if someone's just wanting to be a diva and it's their wedding and they want these things to go great, let them be a diva. Let them have their moment. And it sounds like you're not even being a diva. You're a little like bare minimum. Could you just like not berate me outside of a bar and like literally scream at me that you like hate my husband? Um, so I think you shouldn't compromise anymore. And I think that that's a really selfish friend. Again, unless you, he's, she's like, well, he and I have fucked multiple times or like, yeah, you didn't hear that he fucked XYZ the other month?

• 54:01Alex Cooper?

  Yeah. If she doesn't come with tea, then like jealous, weird energy. I don't know what's going on, but like ignore and enjoy yourself, sweetie. Um, okay. Next question. Hi Daddy. I have been dating my boyfriend for four months. He's communicative, kind, and is honestly the perfect guy. But he still has not said, I love you. I feel safe and cared for with him, but the words matter to me. Am I overthinking this? Or should I expect him to actually say it? Okay. In my opinion, four months in of saying, I love you is a little early. That's just me. Um, I'm sure there are people that have said it earlier, but I think that if you are saying that your boyfriend is communicative, he's kind, he's sexy, he's hot, everything's going well.

• 54:46Alex Cooper?

  He just hasn't said, I love you. I think maybe you're just trying to rush it a little bit. And I think you're in your own head and you're looking for that next step. And if I can give you any advice, like I kind of talked about the beginning of this episode, like you're in honeymoon land. Enjoy yourself. Like have fun. You're dating, you're experiencing each other, you're figuring each other out. You've known each other for four months. This is fun. This is hot. You have all the time in the world to be in love. I think when it gets closer to that, like.

• 55:16Alex Cooper?

  Seven, eight month mark, and if you're not both actively, like I remember with multiple of my boyfriends that I've said I love you too, like you're, you have that moment where you're like, I like you so much. And you guys have like a joke, kind of like, I'm sure people have done that in their relationships where we're like, I like you, like you, like you, like you, like you a lot. And you're basically like, I literally want to word vomit that I love you, but I want to wait a second longer. If that doesn't come by like seven, eight to like a year mark, sure, I think you have a problem. Um, not a problem, but you should have a conversation about it. Like, how are you feeling about our relationship? I just also think I love yous mean, like, saying I love you means different things to different people. And it doesn't mean different, well, it does mean different things,

• 56:00Alex Cooper?

  but it also has a different weight, right? You don't know his backstory. Has he said I love you before and someone didn't say it back? Has he just have like extreme, like he moves slower in relationships? But again, four months isn't slow. Um, my last bit of advice to you honestly is that, why don't you say it first? I mean, I don't know if you're gonna like hate me for saying that, but if you're feeling it, you should say it, right? I think that if you're feeling it so deeply, but ask yourself, if you say, no, I would never, why? Cause you're in a, if you're in a mutual relationship, you should feel comfortable to tell him you love him, even if he doesn't say it back immediately and still needs more time. If that's your fear, then you should wait too.

• 56:43Alex Cooper?

  But I think getting stressed about the I love yous, I do think is a little immature if you're worried in the first like two, three, four months. Past seven month mark, that's fair game to start wondering if there's love, not lust. Okay, next question. My fiance's mom insists on coming wedding dress shopping with me, but she's already made comments about what I shouldn't wear because it's not flattering for my body type. Kill her. Absolutely kill this bitch. We're gonna run her over. Oh my God. You said, I want this day to be special and I want to enjoy it. And I feel like I won't be able to if she's there. Yeah, no shit. I agree with you. But also I don't want to start a war by not inviting her to join. What should I do, dude?

• 57:29Alex Cooper?

  This type of shit is so fucking hard and I have so much empathy for you because it's like, I know what you're saying. How cra- how crazy is this? This woman is making you feel insecure about your body and telling you things that you shouldn't wear because it's not flattering on your body type. Great, so she's basically calling you fat and you're like, hey, so I'm trying to find like the dress that I love for my fucking wedding, you fucking dumb cunt. Um, but meanwhile, you sit there and you just have to smile because it's your mother-in-law. Meanwhile, you're then having to worry about not inviting her because her feelings will get hurt and it will start a war. Make it make sense. She's the aggressor, she's the piece of shit, but then you still have to invite the piece of shit because what she will cause a temper tantrum. Think about what is the one common denominator here.

• 58:13Alex Cooper?

  It's all about her. Whose wedding is it? Yours. Here's my advice to you. I think you actually need to start by talking to your partner. If this was another random, if this was the fucking, a random friend or a random whore on the side of the road saying this shit to you, I would be like, clock her, let her know who's boss. This is a mother-in-law. So this is like, girl, this is your husband, you got a long ways to go. We're playing the long game, okay? We're not playing the short game. So number one, we're gonna go to her son, who she birthed.

• 58:50Alex Cooper?

  And you're essentially gonna go and confide in your partner and say, babe, I need to tell you something that is kind of hurtful and embarrassing and weird and like, I just need you to know. And maybe he already knows this, okay? But if he doesn't, you share with him that your mom has made so many comments about my body and in the wake of dress shopping for our wedding, I want to be surrounded by excitement and love and I want to feel beautiful and I want to feel how I feel when you look at me, like the most special girl, most beautiful girl in the room, right? And I am so nervous about inviting your mom dress shopping because she's already done this and she continues to do it. And she said this about my body multiple times.

• 59:36Alex Cooper?

  So I was wondering if you could help me in this conversation. Don't put it on him. But I was wondering if you could help me and how you think I should navigate the situation. Cause he knows this bitch more than anyone, right? Number one, if he kinda shuts down. If he shuts down and it's like, well, I'm sure like she won't do it when you're wedding dress shopping. Oh yeah, no, she just did it when I was like trying on slacks for a fucking job interview. But she won't do it when I'm trying on the white dress. No, no, she won't do it then, right? Like if he starts to kind of like move around in a way that he's like kinda defending her, but kind of like not willing to get, put accountability onto her. You need to get into couples therapy because I am telling you

• 1:00:19Alex Cooper?

  this is going to be for the rest of your life, that it is going to be her against you. And if you don't have your future husband backing you on this situation, you are going to either have to concede and just sit there and take it for the rest of your life, which I don't think as a daddy gang member, you are the type of person that will do that. Or it's going to be you against this mother-in-law and it's going to cause serious fucking issues for the rest of your life where you're butting heads. You need your partner next to you advocating for you, especially in these moments where it's so clear cut. She is the one in the wrong. So first, talk to your partner about how you, he thinks that this could be handled well. Number two, I think essentially what you need to do is you need to call her.

• 1:01:02Alex Cooper?

  And after you get advice from your husband, hopefully it's some brilliant, brilliant, grade A Shakespeare, emotionally intelligent advice, cause that's the man you're marrying, right? Hopefully he's so supportive, supportive king. You take his advice, you call the mother-in-law. Write your script down on your phone or your computer and you're going to read it. Hi.

• 1:01:27Alex Cooper?

  Should I come up with another name? Yeah, give me a second. Hi, I'm trying to think of a fucking little shit fuck name. Hey Martha, it's me.

• 1:01:39Alex Cooper?

  Um, do you have a second to chat?

• 1:01:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, sure.

• 1:01:43Alex Cooper?

  Um, I wanted to call you because this isn't an easy thing for me to bring up and honestly, I'm a little uncomfortable, but I, you know, want to be upfront and honest with you about how I've been feeling and I hope you can hear me out here. I am a little anxious about wedding dress shopping because I really would love you to participate and feel included in this and I want you to feel comfortable to come, but there have been comments that you've made in the past about my body that have made me honestly feel really insecure and really shitty about myself and I don't know if you

• 1:02:25Alex Cooper?

  were doing it and not noticing you were doing it, um, but it's happened multiple times to the point where I can't help but get some anxiety thinking about me putting on my dress and hearing these comments from you and what I need is support and love and people making me feel so beautiful when I try on these dream dresses of mine and I just wanted to have an honest conversation and see if you would like to come, but if you felt like there was a way to have more of a supportive energy in these type of moments for me. The goal is that she is like,

• 1:03:04Alex Cooper?

  Samantha, I am so mortified and I am so sorry and I cannot believe that I said those things and if I'm honest, I have dealt with self-image for a very long time and I find myself projecting it sometimes onto others and that is not for you to ever, ever have to deal with and I am, I'm embarrassed and I apologize and I promise you, I want nothing more to be there for you. I want, I'm actually not even gonna finish the statement because I'm so sorry, but this is probably not even what she's gonna fucking say. We're all listening, we're like, oh my god, a dream mother-in-law, this bitch sounds like a fucking cunt. So let's actually get to what she's probably gonna say. She's gonna gaslight you probably, right? Sam, oh my god, it's literally Hilary Duff and Jennifer Coolidge in the Cinderella story.

• 1:03:49Alex Cooper?

  Sam, um, she's like, Sam, I don't know what you're talking about. She's gonna be like, Sam.

• 1:03:56Alex Cooper?

  I'm honestly quite hurt right now and insulted. Um, I don't know what you're talking about. I am always supportive of you and Chris. And I am, I, I don't even, I don't even know where this is coming. She's gonna go, she's gonna probably go off or she's gonna take no accountability, whatever it be. Totally. Um, well, I will let you, if she goes off, say, I will let you know if there is a place for you to come in and to see the dresses as I'm trying them on. I will keep you updated, but I'll be honest, I need to protect my peace and my happiness. And so I'll keep you updated. Give no dates, give no times. And then what I would do is this. Bitch, go fucking with your family and your friends and go get your dress and find your dress.

• 1:04:39Alex Cooper?

  And then if she somewhat makes more of an effort in the next few weeks, because that dumb bitch wants to see the fucking dresses and pretend she picked it, she's gonna be like, Chris, do you like the dress I picked it for her? Like, she's probably gonna be crazy. Um, I think then you can call her and be like, hey, do you want to come? I'm doing the final fitting. But still then, I just worry for you. The bigger theme is that she feels entitled to comment on your body and your appearance. And I just think this is a perfect moment to initiate the conversation because it's never gonna start, stop. It's never gonna stop. It's the wedding right now. And then it's gonna be if you want to have kids or you don't want to have kids, or when you are dressed up for your birthday this year, whatever it be.

• 1:05:24Alex Cooper?

  As uncomfortable as it be, if you have the support of your husband, you will get through this. And if you don't,

• 1:05:35Alex Cooper?

  that's for another episode. Um, okay, daddy gang, I love you guys so much. I hope that my advice was helpful. Um, wait, do you guys want to see Henry? Because I feel like you only saw Bruce. Henry, come here. Come here. Come up here. Come here. Come here.

• 1:05:54Alex Cooper?

  Bruce, wait Bruce. Okay, okay, you guys, it's a family affair. Um, Henry and Bruce just wanted to say thank you so much for watching this episode of Call Her Daddy. Oh, here, Henry. Yeah, okay. Um, thank you so much for watching this episode of Call Her Daddy. The boys are happy that we could help anyone in need. Please write in questions all the time if you ever need any help and I will see you guys next Wednesday. Bye.

• 1:06:42Alex Cooper?

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• 1:07:26Alex Cooper?

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• 1:08:11Alex Cooper?

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