"Right Person Wrong Time" is a Myth

This week, Alex discusses the idea of the “right person, wrong time” and why it can keep you emotionally attached to someone who has already moved on. She dives into how romanticizing potential protects us from rejection, prevents us from grieving, and causes us to put our lives on hold. She then answers questions about destination weddings, seeking attention outside a relationship, and comparing your life choices to your friends. Enjoy!

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by American Eagle. Okay, so fall is almost here and the new arrivals from American Eagle, kinda obsessed. We're talking sweet dresses, soft sweaters you'll want to live in, on trend jeans and cargos you'll want to wear on repeat. And if you see a style you love, grab it now because you already know the good stuff doesn't stay in stock for long. You can check it all out at ae.com or just go to the store. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Stouffer's. Let me tell you something, when I am hungry and I am trying to figure out what to eat, sometimes you can just actually become so, you're angry. You're like, I am busy, I'm

• 0:41Speaker 00

  hungry, I'm getting hangry, I'm getting angry, what can I eat? I need something hot and delicious and low maintenance. Well, introducing Stouffer's dinners are not only delicious, they're done in a flash. Serve up their classic lasagna, chicken pesto, or carbonara for two, whatever you're craving. Stouffer's is your hot, delicious, easy meal fantasy. When the clock strikes dinner, think Stouffer's. You can see all the delicious options at stouffer's.com.

• 1:08Speaker 01

  Nowadays, you have certain expectations when you fly, like people napping on the airport floor, or flying in your pajamas. You know what you don't expect? Free drinks. But now, T-Mobile members get a free premium drink when they fly Delta Airlines. So just sit back, relax, and switch to T-Mobile today. Visit tmobile.com/membership for details. It's better over here. Get a free premium Delta drink with eligible plan and link SkyMiles account 24 hours before qualifying. Flight required. Must be 21 or older. CT life for terms.

• 1:38Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Uber. Uber just introduced a new feature called Women Preferences, which lets women riders request a woman driver directly in the app. It's honestly an amazing feature that gives women more control over their rides. Sometimes we all just want a ride that feels a little more comfortable and chill. So if you haven't used it yet, Uber's new Women Preferences feature is available now in the Uber app. Learn more on the Uber app. Hello Daddy Gang, welcome back to another Sunday Session. We're bumpin'. We are bumpin'. It's funny because when I'm wearing my sweatpants and my hoodies, I'm like, do people know I'm even pregnant? So I'm like, I'm trying to like lean into the bump, but it's also hard

• 2:23Speaker 00

  to situate yourself in front of cameras while you have a bump. So it's, just go with me here. Um, I will say, pregnancy so far has been a lot of ups and downs. There are some incredible days and there are some really trying days. Um, I haven't slept, so I think that just gives me a pass on whatever I say for the next few months. Like, it's not me. I didn't realize so much about pregnancy, and I'll be honest, like, in hindsight, I've had friends who are pregnant, but I've never explored and questioned the process and the

• 3:06Speaker 00

  ailments that come with it and the, just all the things. Like, I guess I've just never really asked. And so now that I'm living it, I am really discovering a lot. And so I didn't fully realize that you just don't, you just don't sleep in pregnancy. And I have seen a lot of women say, oh, it's just preparing you for when you have a kid. I'm like, oh, oh, that's amazing. Um, but so yeah, you don't really sleep when you're pregnant. And as my bump has gotten larger and larger progressively, what happens during the middle of the night, you guys, is it's, it's a really big experience that you go through and you go through it alone. So while my husband is doing like his light little snoring, I want to just whack him in the face with the pillow. And I do do that sometimes. Sometimes I will

• 3:51Speaker 00

  whack Matt and he's like, what, what? And I'm like, what, what? I pretend, I'm like, oh my God, was that a ghost would happen? Cause I just want him to like sit there with me and be awake. You know what I mean? Poor Matt is like constantly getting jarred awake. Um, he falls asleep also in four minutes. He was looking at his, he wears one of those health Google bands at night specifically. And I have stopped wearing it for a second because I'm like, I don't want to see it right now. Maybe in a little bit, but like I can't see right now because I know it's going to be so dark. And Matt's last night said, you fell asleep in four minutes. Oh, okay, divorce. Oh, okay, divorce. I was like,

• 4:31Speaker 00

  you, you fell asleep before. I, the things I wish, four minutes? It's not even, I mean, I would love for any woman to tell me if you can fall asleep that easily, but I'm convinced that men just, he'll be in the middle of talking to me, you guys. And I'm like, so yeah, so then I was thinking, you know, we should talk to Erica about, and he's like, and I'm like, wait, you were just talking two seconds ago. So Matt's having the time of his life being dead asleep. I am, I'm moving and shaking. So your bump, basically, when you go from side to side, you don't just flip from side to side like you normally would when you're sleeping as, you know, a non-pregnant person. This is, this is heavy,

• 5:11Speaker 00

  okay? This is heavy weight. And so I'm physically having to be cognizant of my motions as I'm moving over because also I've had it a couple of times where you can get a cramp or like currently, my baby's foot is lodged like so high up here. And so if I move too quickly and I flip over, like I used to be a gymnast in the bedroom, okay? I would be dead asleep and I'm just, I'm like, I'm literally like the exorcist where I'm flipping my body and I'm somehow on my right side and I'm still asleep. Now it's like, all right, let me just, let me just turn over here. And it's like a big crane. Okay, it's a big crane. And I know to all my women who are like really about to give birth, I know you're like, oh

• 5:55Speaker 00

  girl, just wait because this third trimester, you're just going to get even bigger, bigger, bigger. I understand that, but for right now, it already feels big. So to get bigger is going to be an adventure. Anyways, so the sleeping situation isn't great. You pee at least two times a night for myself. Again, my child's head, what's so lovely, again, it's just like preparing me for parenthood, is every single time I've gone to my doctor, she's like, oh my God, the head is still in the same location. I'm like, oh, just say it. And she's like, right on the bladder. I'm like, boom. I'm telling you guys, this child's head has not moved off of my bladder this entire pregnancy. So you already have

• 6:37Speaker 00

  so much pressure because it's kind of like compacts your bladder when you get pregnant. But then to also have a head and a growing head, just right there, just sitting right here, we're peeing 24/7. It almost feels like a constant UTI because even after I pee, I'm like, do I have to pee again? And it's like, nope, that's just, that's just your body. So like, there's things that I'm getting used to. I will say, let's pick out a positive, you know, not to freak everyone out. The positives I will say, um, is there is nothing more connecting and incredible and wild and just, it's, it's not even out of body because it's obviously in my body, but it feels that way when you feel your child kicking and

• 7:21Speaker 00

  moving. I don't even know how to describe it, you guys. I feel so in shock that I can feel now how big this child is. And I can watch as this part of my belly bumps out and this part is moving. It looks like it's doing a somersault. And I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa. So there's just like a lot of cool, fascinating parts, I think, about the body. My boobs keep getting bigger. Don't look, okay? I would think I'd be like thrilled that my boobs are getting bigger and just like more fuller. But I'm just kinda like, uh, I don't know. I would love to hear from other mothers and who are pregnant, like something about the boobs, you go through a little phase where you're like, okay, this is kind of like looking good. And then you're kinda like, I don't even, it's just a little,

• 8:05Speaker 00

  it's, it's a lot, it's a lot. So overall, I'm enjoying pregnancy. I'm, I'm leaning in. Um, but there's anxiety that comes with it because you just want this child to be healthy and you want to be healthy. And yeah, so that's what's going on.

• 8:40Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Revolve. You know, I'm a father and now I'm also a mother. Okay. I'm not going to lie. I don't think my entire style is going to change now that I'm a mom, but like, I'm definitely looking at some more sweaters than going out tops. I know. What a concept. And I'm like liking my like, I'm, I'm evolving. Okay. We're growing. Okay. And so I'm constantly looking for good little outfits to put together for a date night where I'm like, okay, I can be with the baby and then I can go and still have my husband be like, damn, Alex, you look great. There's, there's going to be a balance. And whether you're building for your future hot mom wardrobe, or you're just trying to honestly find pieces that make you feel put together that are still comfortable, then you will love Revolve.

• 9:25Speaker 00

  Okay. I have been on Revolve. Also, the shipping is incredible. All of it's incredible. But when you're shopping on Revolve, basically you're able to find curated outfits in a way that makes getting dressed easier. Once you find something on the website that you like, my favorite thing about this website is you then also can find similar options. So you can basically build the entire outfit in a couple clicks. And you can also shop for occasion, which is very nice, because sometimes I didn't even know that I was going to that occasion. And then I see the occasion as a tab and I'm like, maybe I am going to, you know, need a ball gown soon. And then here I am purchasing a ball gown. Revolve literally has everything from elevated basics and matching sets when you're just stepping out to grab coffee with a friend, and then other statement pieces for big events.

• 10:07Speaker 00

  Listen, hot girl energy, hot mom energy, whatever era you're in, Revolve has the outfit for it. Revolve has the hottest brands, new arrivals dropping daily, and pieces you'll wear over and over again. Go to revolve.com/chd and use code CHD for 15% off your order. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ritual. It seems like everything is connected to your gut microbiome. Don't you feel like that, guys? We're just hearing that constantly, like, well, it always goes back to the gut health. And I'm like, oh, okay. So it's the gut health. But did you know the gut microbiome shifts during pregnancy? Yeah, these are the things I've recently learned, guys. And these shifts can impact mom and baby's health in pregnancy and postpartum. Yes, these are things I've recently learned. Okay?

• 10:52Speaker 00

  And that is why Ritual created Natal Biotic, a specialized biotic with clinically studied strains for pregnancy and postpartum microbiome support to support digestive health, mood, vaginal health, and baby's immune health. Here's the thing, guys, as I've been pregnant, I have just become so aware of my health. Obviously, I got diagnosed with gestational diabetes. And so my entire day is just consisting of how can I take care of this baby? And with Ritual, I feel so set up to do that. And I feel way less overwhelmed with trying to Google things that I'm like, what does this mean? Ritual kind of just does it all for you. So whether you're pregnant, postpartum, or you're looking for everyday trusted daily gut support, get clinically studied biotics

• 11:35Speaker 00

  to support your gut health with Ritual. My listeners can save 25% on their first month at ritual.com/callherdaddy. That's ritual.com/callherdaddy for 25% off your first month. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Okay, now to you guys. Enough about me. Okay? I hope you had such an incredible week. I hope you hydrated. And I hope you are ready to get called out today.

• 12:17Speaker 00

  Because in preparing for this episode, I realized I think that we need to talk about one of the biggest, most toxic lies we have all collectively agreed to believe. We are going to tackle the ultimate relationship coping mechanism today, which is right person, wrong time. Everyone's already triggered. I know. We are going there. How many of you right now are sitting, maybe you're in your car, you're walking on the treadmill, you're laying in bed, you're staring at the ceiling, and you immediately, when I said that, you're thinking about that person, right? The one who got away.

• 13:00Speaker 00

  The one where you're like, oh, if only we met three years later. If only they didn't move to Chicago. If only they were done with their F-boy phase. If only, if only, if only then it would have worked. And it's like, guys, I hate to break it to you, but I am going to give you some tough love today. Okay? We are basically going to completely tear this concept apart because I want to be clear. I used to be the queen of rationalizing bad situations with this exact phrase. So you are not alone. I want to make you feel very, very cozy and comfy when I say,

• 13:42Speaker 00

  I am speaking from so much experience. Not just, you know, experience. I am speaking from lived experience. But today, instead of focusing on feelings, I do want to just, I want to look at the facts. Why do we say it? Why do we say right person, wrong time?

• 14:05Speaker 00

  I think we say it because the truth is too painful to face. It's so much easier to just blame the universe, or a calendar, or a zip code than it is to admit the harsh reality. They just didn't want it enough. Or you didn't want it enough. That's it. That's the truth. Like it or hate it, those are the facts. Because, be real with me here, please think about it logically. When you are truly, deeply, madly in love with someone, when you look at them and you think, this is my person, you do not let timing be an issue. And you don't let that stop you.

• 14:46Speaker 00

  You figure it out. You move them out. And if someone tells you, guys, if someone tells you, I love you so much, you're perfect for me, but the timing is just wrong.

• 15:00Speaker 00

  Okay, what they are actually saying is, I like you, but I like my current lifestyle, or my current freedom, or my current career more than I like the idea of being with you. And I am choosing that over you. Let the tears fall down and wake your dreams. It's, it's harsh. I get it. Okay, I get it. But I have to acknowledge, and we all have to acknowledge, that's their right. That is your right. Right? Like, if that's the case, that is so okay. But we need to stop wrapping it up in this pretty little bow and calling it, oh, this is just a tragedy of the universe. It's not fate playing a trick on you, daddy gang.

• 15:43Speaker 00

  It is a choice. It is a cognizant decision that one human being is making. The stars did not force this one to happen, sadly. Like, I know people, including myself, who are watching are like, no, no, but like, he is my soulmate. It's just he's focusing on his career right now. Like, that's it. Or like, she's the one. But like, she's just kind of going through this phase. Girl, I love you, but we are just lying to ourselves. And how long can you keep lying to yourself? Right? So as I was thinking about talking to you all about this, I was like, okay, okay, okay. So fair, a lot of us do this, but why do we do this? Right?

• 16:26Speaker 00

  I think that one reason we do this is kind of very obvious. It protects our egos. Right? Rejection, let's be real. It is a very, very brutal pill to swallow. It hurts way less to blame a construct like time than it does to admit, hey, this person just doesn't want me enough to make it work. And so we convince ourselves, it's not me. Obviously, it's not me. It's the clock. It's time. Spoiler, bitch. It's not the clock. It is you, actually. Another reason we do this, I think we love a tragic movie plot.

• 17:09Speaker 00

  We have been brainwashed by romantic comedies to believe that love needs to be this struggle. We think we, you know, if we suffer through the wrong time, the payoff will just be the most cinematic reunion of an experience. Let me just tell you something. This was me to a T, to a T with a previous relationship, you guys. If anything, the fact, I feel like that we couldn't be together at the time, it somehow made me like him more. Like, like, and now in hindsight, I'm like, it almost made me like him more than if we were actually together. The idea was better than the reality.

• 17:52Speaker 00

  And I somehow found it oddly extremely romantic that we just, we couldn't be together. Just wasn't right time. Okay? But of course, we're gonna come back together. It's just timing. Like, obviously, we're gonna reconnect. It's just, we gotta, it never happened. Guys, it never fucking happened. Okay? All those sleepless nights, all the journaling. And you guys know I don't journal, but I journaled. And the letters I wrote, it did nothing. Okay? Right person, wrong time. Like, he never came back. It never ended up working. And so then I think the most important and obvious reason that we do this and we lie to ourselves is

• 18:37Speaker 00

  This one hurts, but it's really the truth. It keeps the door open. If it's just the wrong time, you don't actually have to mourn the relationship and move on.

• 18:52Speaker 00

  You get to basically keep them on this shelf in your mind, waiting for the right time to magically appear. It's basically a full coping mechanism for avoidance. If you don't have to fully face that it's over, babe, we can just still live in our delusion. It's not over. He's coming back around. He's coming back around the merry go round. It's like, babe, that thing shut off years ago. Okay? And I think what's really important to acknowledge is that is a very dark psychological trap that we have to address. Because what happens when you believe in right person, wrong time, you essentially put your life on pause.

• 19:34Speaker 00

  You can become a ghost in your own dating life, right? You go out on a date with a perfectly great guy or girl, and the entire time you're just comparing them to the right person, who unfortunately is currently living across the country, or is currently just finding themselves. And you're just like, holding this torch for a fantasy, but it actually doesn't even exist anymore. Because that's what right person, wrong time usually is. It is a fantasy. You are in love with the potential of what could have been, not the reality of what actually is in front of you. The reality was that it didn't work out.

• 20:14Speaker 00

  I remember. I remember. Alright, let's go back. I've kind of like blocked these days out, guys, so give me a second. But I do remember, if I can recall correctly, back in the day, the guy that I did this with, I convinced myself for ages that if the stars just aligned, we're gonna be together. Okay? I was like, no, no, no. We got a couple hiccups. There's like a couple little road bumps. He's doing this, I'm doing this. But we will be back together. And I wasted so much emotional real estate on a guy who was simply not ready to commit to me.

• 20:57Speaker 00

  And when someone shows you or tells you they aren't ready, we have to believe them. Don't try to rewrite their narrative into some romantic story that keeps you hung up even after it ends. You're lying to yourself. You are romanticizing a really not so romantic situation. Okay? And so I ask that, please listen to me closely when I say, if someone is truly your right person,

• 21:31Speaker 00

  the timing becomes a secondary factor, and it kind of becomes a non-issue. When people want to be with you, they don't give you a rain check. They don't say, whoa, you are the love of my life. I think we just need to pause and like, let's revisit in three years. Like, let's revisit when my schedule clears up a little bit. Let's reschedule when I'm a little bit of a different person. Like, no, no, no. They figure it out. They move cities, they change schedules, they lose sleep. They make room for you. If someone is letting you go because of timing, what they are actually saying is, you are not worth the inconvenience of adjusting my life right now. And I know it sounds harsh, but it is to some degree liberating if you can finally accept that.

• 22:16Speaker 00

  You're all like, speak for yourself. Okay? Speak for yourself, Alex. That feels horrible. But I don't, I don't want to hear any of that. I get it. I get it. College me would have also maybe turned this off by this point. You're like, la, la, la, la. Um, trust me, I get it. And I really get it more than I wish. So I'm not gonna leave you hanging, obviously. We gotta, we gotta make ourselves feel better here, right? Let's acknowledge how we break this cycle. Okay? How do we move on from the wrong time trap? When I think about it, if I could go back and give myself advice, it would be, step one is, you need to close the chapter.

• 23:02Speaker 00

  You need to stop checking their Instagram stories, stop checking their Spotify to see what sad songs they're listening to. You are feeding the delusion. You, not them, you. And you need to stop holding on to one day, because that mentality is making it quite literally impossible for you to move on. And you feel less guilty for checking in on them and stalking their social medias, because again, it's the right person, it's just the wrong time, right? Maybe, maybe it will be the right time soon, and you convince yourself, so like, I gotta keep tabs. I gotta keep tabs on them. How am I gonna know if it's the right time if I don't keep tabs? And it's like, no, no, slick.

• 23:45Speaker 00

  You're, you're being there, like, I see where you're going with that, but no. If you want to be real with yourself, it's a hard fucking no. Then step two. Step two, after you are like, okay, I, I need to actually close that chapter, you need to reframe the narrative in your head. They weren't the right person at the wrong time. They were the wrong person, period. Because the right person is someone who is willing and ready and capable of choosing you right now. Timing? I mean, I, I think it, it's obvious, but maybe we've convinced ourselves so much that it doesn't seem obvious, but like, guys, timing is a part of the package deal of a person being the right person.

• 24:29Speaker 00

  If they can't meet you where you are, then they're not your person, period. So when you say, right person, wrong time, what it actually means is, wrong person, wrong. You're seeing a little bit of like, green, yellow, and it's like, no, it's red. Because the right person is the right time. When you say, okay, here we go. This is, this is, this, hopefully this will help, hurt and help. When you say to yourself, they just need to find themselves, what it actually means is, they don't want to be found with you. Okay? And when you say, we'll end up together eventually,

• 25:11Speaker 00

  what it actually means is, I am pausing my life for someone who is moving on with theirs.

• 25:18Speaker 00

  Guys, life is way too short to be waiting around in the waiting room of someone else's life. And you're just like, you ready yet? You ready? And most of the time, these people are, if, if they've let it drag on this long, then they're probably not gonna give you the hard truth. And so they're gonna just let you linger in the waiting room. They're like, oh my God, she's still there. You deserve the person who looks at a chaotic, messy, inconvenient timeline and says, I don't care. We're making this work. Stop romanticizing potential and start looking at reality. If they wanted to, they would. If they aren't, they aren't your person, period. Close the chapter. Put on your hottest outfit and go find someone who aligns with your present, not this hypothetical future.

• 26:03Speaker 00

  We all deserve that.

• 26:06Speaker 00

  Last thing I will say is, I remember

• 26:11Speaker 00

  when I was dealing actually kind of with this like, wrong, right person, wrong time in my head, shortly after I met Matt. And so many things in my life and Matt's life did not, or shouldn't have worked at first. I was living in New York, he was living in Los Angeles, let's just start there. I have no interest in long distance relationships. Like, I have never been a full long distance relationship kind of girl. And every time I did it, I just ended up feeling like, ugh, I don't want to be doing this. And when I met Matt, it was like, oh my God, I actually want to do this. I will do long distance with this person. I actually like, don't really care. And it was so unlike me, but it was like, because I felt like this was actually the right person. And he felt the same way.

• 26:56Speaker 00

  Our traveling schedules were so crazy and hectic, and, and he was on different time zones, or he was traveling to different countries to make movies, and he would stay up, and it would be like 4:00 AM his time to make sure he got to talk to me in the morning, or vice versa. And like, it was hard. And in the beginning days, it was a lot of work to like, actually find a way to merge our lives. And then when I did move out to Los Angeles, there was so much that also went into how different at first our lives were. And we just kept working through it, because we knew, oh my God, you're the right person for me. And so none of this, logistically, should stop us, even if we're getting some sleepless nights, even if it's hard in the beginning,

• 27:41Speaker 00

  even if it's like, we're having to adjust. I want to adjust certain things in my life so that we can make this work together. And so then I was able to look back at a lot of the people that I thought like, oh my God, right person, wrong time. And I'm like, one of them specifically, you guys, I was really convinced, he really, oh my God, this really could be my person. I look back and I'm like, oh my God. I had painted this entire picture in my head that he was actually quite direct in a lot of moments, but I was hearing it in a way that I wanted to hear it. He was telling me that we couldn't, you know, fully date because of XYZ. And I took that as like, he's actually caring about my feelings,

• 28:24Speaker 00

  and he's giving me the heads up because he cares so much about me. Guys, it's so crazy when your frontal lobe isn't fully developed. Even saying this out loud, I'm like, okay, this is embarrassing. I convinced myself, like, he's saying we can't be boyfriend-girlfriend right now because his schedule is so crazy that like, he doesn't want to commit and like, hurt me. So like, we should just stay in this like, in-between, you know, situationship phase. Bitch. Then I meet Matt and he's like, I-I'm into you, I'm gonna make an effort, we're gonna do this, we're gonna do that. Like, and I was like, oh my god, that's what this is supposed to feel like. An actual person being direct. And even when Matt would like, not like something I did, or like something, like, he just would always tell me.

• 29:07Speaker 00

  Meanwhile, I looked back and I was like, I got so good at like, decoding, you know? You know you've really been through the wringer in your past relationships when you're like, I am, I-I could de- I, it's like the Swifties. We can look and there's Easter eggs and you're like, I can put these pieces together, but in a romantic relationship, you shouldn't have to be like, alright. So on the 24th, he did tell me this, but really, I think he meant this. So this kind of fits into this category, and this should make me feel this way. And it's like, no, stop trying to make this fantasy and this whole thing happen. You're just literally concocting a big, big lie in front of your face that you're just like, drinking the Kool-Aid. And the longer you do that, you go down this really, really dark path.

• 29:50Speaker 00

  And so, I hope today, anyone who is listening, who is in my situation, I wish I would have had someone who could have given me this advice when I was going through that, because those tangibles, I would have been like, okay, maybe this is actually like, completely my situation. I know it's hard to hear, but that's what we do here on Caller Daddy, okay? We talk about the hard things, and not the easy things, and then we try to make the hard things easier by talking it through. Oh, maybe it's the glasses, you know, maybe it's the glasses today, they give me that little edge. Um, okay, let's answer some questions of the motherfucking week.

• 30:45Speaker 00

  Question number one. My friend wants to have her wedding in Greece next summer, but we've already committed to another close friend's wedding in Italy that same summer. It's the exact same friend group, and we'd all be bridesmaids. We've explained that two European weddings in one summer would be financially and logistically difficult and close to impossible, but she says it's normal and that everyone has expenses. We suggested choosing a closer destination, or spacing the weddings farther apart, but she feels that's unfair. I know it's her wedding and her choice, but I'm annoyed that she doesn't seem to care how much stress and expense this puts on the same group of friends. Thoughts? Oh.

• 31:25Speaker 00

  Okay, I want to preface this before I answer this with, I have been so, um, fortunate that my friend group, when it comes to weddings, somehow, knock on wood, we have not had any major issues when it comes to like, logistics, or animosity, or resentment building. And so, when I answer this question, I am not speaking from experience, I am going to be speaking in hypotheticals, which I do think is important, because obviously, I've never gone through something like this. But let me just, let me just try to work this out with you for a minute. My first thought is, whenever I've posted about weddings, or, you know, bachelorettes,

• 32:08Speaker 00

  there's such a huge issue when it comes down to everyone's personal opinion of how much they are willing to spend, how much they're comfortable spending, understandably, and also just like, etiquette that goes into it. If you lined up 10 people on the street, every single person is probably gonna have a different answer of how you should handle this situation. So I want to be very mindful, okay? I'm not getting cancelled over no opinion on a Greece wedding that isn't mine, okay? This is hypothetical, everyone calm down. Two Europe trips in one summer is so financially straining, it is psychotic when it comes to taking off work, it is logistically hard.

• 32:51Speaker 00

  If any of these people have kids, like, I don't know a lot of people that go to Europe twice in a summer. So this is a lot. So I'm acknowledging that this is a lot, that this person is asking of you. What sucks is how close you all are, you're gonna be a bridesmaid in this. I would say that, god, it-it is a little bit on you, you feel like, yeah, of course you have to go, but how you go, I don't know. And I literally think what sucks is it seems like this bride is kind of unwilling to have a conversation about the reality of the situation, and she's kind of like, you kind of have to suck it up, but what if you can't? What if you literally can't afford this? I think that's what's hard about these destination weddings, is, in my opinion, okay?

• 33:34Speaker 00

  Sue me, I think that if you have a destination wedding, you are basically acknowledging that you're okay if a bunch of people don't come.

• 33:46Speaker 00

  Don't shoot me, but I do think that's the case, because to expect people to travel, and the finances again, and all the logistics that go into that dynamic, it is a lot to ask of someone. And so, I do think that, like, half of the people I also talk to, they're like, oh, we're doing it there because we're hoping no, like, half of the list doesn't end up coming. And you hear people say that, right? So, I do think there needs to be some honest conversation. I would be interested to see if you could bring your friend group together and all have an honest conversation about like, what, what is everyone doing?

• 34:21Speaker 00

  And who knows, maybe it impacts like, do you do something a little less with the Greece trip so that you can also spread it out to the Italy trip? I have no idea, but I think you need to talk to your friends about it, because obviously, each of you is gonna be in a different financial situation, but it seems like you all have this like, big group where like, one person making a rogue decision, it's gonna alienate them. And so I think getting on the same page with your friends, and if the bride is unwilling to talk about it with you, fine, leave her out of it for now, but get all the bridesmaids together and be like, guys, literally, what are we doing? And that's where I think this kind of stuff, like, literally ends friendships, right? I-I've had so many people write in being like, oh yeah, I never, I don't even speak to my bridesmaids anymore. I'm like, oh my god, what happened?

• 35:03Speaker 00

  I think that emotions get really heightened, and the bride sees things completely different than the bridesmaids, and I'm not saying one is, is acting better than the other, but this kind of brings out like, the worst in people. And I will say, it sucks, but like, everyone has a lot of weddings, and then when you're the person that it's your wedding, you expect them to show up at 100% capacity in their best selves, but it's like, babe, I have seven other weddings this summer. And I think sometimes brides forget that, and I'm not saying that's their issue, but I do think there needs to be a little bit of understanding when it comes to, if you know that they're already going to another European wedding, and it's not where you could bop over, it's like, you have to come back to the States, wait a little bit, go back to Europe.

• 35:50Speaker 00

  I don't know if you can be that mad if some people don't show up. Please, don't get mad at me. I'm just, I never said any of that, and again, guys, pregnancy brain, come on, pregnancy brain, pregnancy brain. Okay, next. Oh my god. Guys, these ones I didn't pick this week, I had someone else pick them, so like, I'm gonna get slammed again. Okay. Is it rude to turn down a bridesmaid invitation?

• 36:20Speaker 00

  How funny that like, on the controversial Richter scale, bridesmaids in weddings, I just can feel it in my bones, I'm like, tread lightly, tread lightly, tread lightly. It's a very sensitive topic. Um, is it wrong to turn down a bridesmaid invitation? An old friend from college asked me to be in her bridal party, but we're not close at all anymore, and I barely even know her fiance. She has plenty of other friends, so I'm honestly confused why she even invited me. Okay, I think I can handle this one a little bit easier. I think that, listen, everyone in life is going to have different opinions on friends, and nostalgia, and, um, you know, the connection that they have to, whether it's high school,

• 37:05Speaker 00

  or college, or whatever it be. And so you may not think that you're as close, and she knows you're maybe not that close, but it may for her be more of like a, oh, she was at such a big pivotal time in my life. And, let's keep it real, she may need to be filling those slots, you know? Like, they may be like, we want to do seven and seven, and she's up to six, and she's like, who else could I get to be in that row of, oh, Jamie, Jamie would be, Jamie will so show up. And so, I actually do think that you can pass on this, but I don't think you need to be honest.

• 37:38Speaker 00

  We're not liars here on Caller Daddy, but I do think sometimes you can omit parts of the truth when you're letting a friend that you're not close to down, to not make it a bigger issue, okay? I think that you could just say, hey girl, I am so happy for you, um, I can't wait for you to have such a, I imagine the wedding's gonna be gorgeous, unfortunately, I have a prior family commitment that weekend. You could also say like, oh my god, I'm sorry, is this bad? But you could be like, I'm so sorry, like, I actually have already committed to a family wedding that weekend, so I won't be able to make it, but like, I love you, and please, like, send me your wedding registry, and like, sending you all the good vibes. I think you can totally respectfully pass on the bridesmaid thing without passing like,

• 38:23Speaker 00

  hey, guy, I mean, guys, unless, I would love to hear if people would actually want you to be honest, because I think that's psychotic. Hey girl, um, Jamie here, we haven't really talked in a while, so I was kind of thrown off that you asked me to be a bridesmaid, and I'm gonna be honest, I don't think we're close enough, I don't even really know your fiance, so like, I don't really think it's appropriate for me to come to your wedding. I mean, yeah, you could be that type of person. I'm not gonna, I would not do that. I'm not gonna do that, because that's just gonna hurt her feelings, you know? Let her down easy. She's got enough to deal with. She's gotta go fill that seventh slot, baby. Okay, next. Hi father, I need some help. I got lunch with a good friend I haven't seen in a while, and she began completely slandering another friend of mine over some drama.

• 39:04Speaker 00

  It felt like she was looking for validation, but I honestly thought she was overreacting and found the whole thing super uncomfortable. I think she could tell, and now she wants to talk. Am I supposed to automatically take a friend's side when they're beefing with someone else I know?

• 39:20Speaker 00

  Fabulous inquiry. So here's the thing about women. Uh, men like sports and we like drama. We like pop culture. We like drama. We like a little bit of gossip here and there. And so when you go to a lunch and maybe, maybe you went to this lunch and Becky was just on her shit. She's feeling herself and she's like, I need to vent. I think what happens sometimes is clearly she was looking to vent and it was coming off way too aggressive. And she wasn't reading the room and she kind of went into a blackout rage. It's classic. We've all been there.

• 40:02Speaker 00

  So I think when a woman needs to get something off her chest, sometimes we, we can't read the room. And I think with her, clearly she went in spiraling a little bit and thought that you could be a companion. And in that moment, you were like, actually you're putting me in a really difficult position. What I really respect about you, and it seems like you did, is like, you didn't just jump in and you didn't just start immediately gossiping with them. Because those are my least favorite kind of people where if you're in the room with one person, you're just a yes man. And you're just like, oh my God, totally. They're so annoying. And then you go see that person later and you're completely fake and nice to them. And then you'll bitch about the person you were just with earlier. It's like, that is so two-faced. And I think there are a lot of people who would rather just indulge it rather than like have a backbone and stand their ground.

• 40:46Speaker 00

  And even if it's just being quiet, that's being a good friend. And sometimes I think it's lost on people. So I love that you didn't engage. If she's following up because she's a feeling it was making you uncomfortable. I do think just being really honest with her can't hurt. I think you can just say, listen, I definitely felt a little uncomfortable. And I don't mean in a way that like, I was, you know, wanting to leave the brunch, but I just felt like it was a lot. I just didn't really know how to act being in the middle of it because I'm on really good terms with her and I have a great relationship with her. So I feel like I'm kind of not the right person to be talking with this about. If she freaks out, that's like on her and she's immature and she needs to figure that out.

• 41:28Speaker 00

  But I do think this is a classic, like the girls are beefing, they're looking for, you know, the neutral party to like sway and bring on their side. And I think you hold your ground because instead of get having to sway left or right, you actually don't need to be a part of this. And that is something that I think that it takes a while to learn that, you know, I feel like none of us knew that in high school, right? High school, you were like, oh, you're either on Taylor's side or you're either on Francine's side. And there ain't no in-between. You team Taylor or you team Francine? And it, and, and there, there's no gray area because maturity and honesty and boundaries, they don't exist back then.

• 42:11Speaker 00

  But then we build that muscle a little bit. And I have a lot of respect for people when you build that muscle, if you can maintain it and do it in a way that's very mature. So kudos to you. You're on the right path. Um, okay, next.

• 42:38Speaker 00

  Call her daddy is brought to you by Haagen Dazs. Okay. It is so important to take some me time. You know what I mean, guys? So take your sweet time and enjoy rich, smooth, creamy ice cream from Haagen Dazs. Because honestly, when was the last time you actually slowed down and let yourself have a moment for you? You have to try their new cherry dark chocolate bar. Guys, picture rich cherry ice cream with tart cherry ribbons coated in thick dark chocolate. Are you kidding me? I'm drooling. Are you drooling yet? No, seriously. This is the kind of thing you don't just eat, you experience it. Okay. Haagen Dazs elevated crafted ice cream is always meant to be savored. So whatever flavor you choose, slow down and enjoy each bite.

• 43:21Speaker 00

  Seriously, it's too good to rush. I grew up with Haagen Dazs in my house. Every single night, my family and I would eat our favorite flavors. I'm obsessed with the cherry dark chocolate bar. Those flavors together, I couldn't be happier. I'm going to watch my favorite TV shows and I'm going to be eating that. Boom. Done. Take your sweet time. That's Dazs. Available at retailers nationwide. Call her daddy is brought to you by ZipRecruiter. Okay. So picture this. You are sitting down for a dinner on a first date. Drinks are ordered, food's on the way. And you're actually excited about this person. But now it's time. We've done the small talk.

• 44:02Speaker 00

  And now we have to ask this man the real hard questions like, are you looking for something serious? Have you had a girlfriend before? Do you have a headboard? Or are you still rocking navy blue sheets? You gotta ask the right questions early to see if someone is actually right for you, right? And daddy gang, the same thing goes for hiring. That is why you need ZipRecruiter. When you post a job, ZipRecruiter suggests screening questions to help you basically find top candidates faster. And today you can try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/daddy. No wonder ZipRecruiter is the number one rated hiring site based on G2.

• 44:44Speaker 00

  Ask questions and hire faster with ZipRecruiter. Four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/daddy. That's ziprecruiter.com/daddy. Meet your match on ZipRecruiter.

• 45:07Speaker 00

  Father, I need some help. I love my boyfriend so much and would never cheat on him. But the other night I was out with friends and ended up talking to a guy I used to be really flirty with. We talked for hours and even though I mentioned my boyfriend throughout the conversation, I know I enjoyed the attention a little more than I should have. I woke up feeling so guilty, even though I technically didn't do anything wrong. Is that a sign that I crossed a line? How do you know the difference? Okay. So there's a couple of dynamics here that I would like to point out.

• 45:39Speaker 00

  I think that it's human nature to, you know, be out and you're like, oh my God, this person's giving me so much attention. If you are feeling like you're not getting that in your relationship, right? Like, I'm trying to think of myself, if I was out and a guy was giving me attention, I, I would just immediately be like, I'm so not interested in this. Because like, I'm, I'm completely fulfilled in my relationship with my husband. So I would be like, immediately shutting that down. And I'm not, I'm not making you feel bad. I'm just acknowledging for you that like form, in my opinion, that's what this is. You're craving that attention because something is missing in your relationship.

• 46:19Speaker 00

  Because otherwise it would just feel, it just wouldn't hit. Like if a man was giving me attention, I'd literally be like, do you see my ring? Like, I don't need, I don't need it. Even if I didn't have a ring and I was still in a relationship and we were dating like Matt and I, like, I just wouldn't entertain it. Cause I'm like, I don't need this. I'm fulfilled. I get a text. So you have to recognize within yourself that yes, you leaned in. I don't think you're a bad person. It just really is exposing something within your relationship. You also saying, I woke up feeling so guilty and I feel like I crossed a line. For me, that means that like, maybe you really do love your boyfriend. It was almost just like, you felt like that night, such a thrill.

• 47:00Speaker 00

  You were like, oh my God, I felt hot. I felt wanted. I felt desired. I felt pursued. And I think a lot of times, woman or man, when you're not getting that in your relationship, if you get it, you know, a night out, a little bit of flirting, no physical connection happens. You, you feel alive again. But unfortunately, that is really a negative sign. It's a negative sign because it's either like, the romantic relationship that you're in is not fulfilling you enough. And so you're having to seek it from other people. And if you felt guilty, the option is number one, you need to have a conversation with your boyfriend.

• 47:41Speaker 00

  Not telling him about this night. Okay. I don't think you did anything to the point where you need to, you know, disclose this to him. But you need to approach the issue and you need to handle the issue. So you don't keep doing that. And I think approaching the issue is whatever the issue is for you, right? Maybe you guys don't really have sex anymore, or maybe you are lacking kind of that intimacy, not sex, the actual sex act. But like, you guys don't really kiss anymore and he doesn't really do this, or you don't really do this. And you kind of become, you know, just kind of partners in life. Um, I think a lot of times when couples move in together, things can get very hard to spice up.

• 48:21Speaker 00

  If they aren't making concerted efforts. And so sometimes you almost become like best friends and you're like, wait, where did we lose our way? Like, he used to court me and I used to surprise him with things when he would come home. And so like, the effort has dwindled. And you're clearly feeling that. And so the attention is feeling so invigorating. You're feeling so alive. But you clearly want that from your boyfriend. So put the effort there in whether you need to put date nights on the books. Or whether you do need to put on a cute outfit and you guys need to reconnect and you need to feel good about yourself. Or you need to plan a date where you both meet from work. So like, you don't go together and you look for him in the bar and you spot him and whatever it is.

• 49:04Speaker 00

  You don't have phones at dinner. You actually connect. Like, I can't tell you what's missing in your relationship. I'm obviously coming up with a bunch of ideas where I'm guessing, but I think this is really common sadly, for a lot of people in a lot of relationships. And they look for external validation.

• 49:24Speaker 00

  And they don't pause to just recognize and maybe they internally like subconsciously, they know it's because they're not getting it from their partner. But instead of trying to do anything about it, they just go get it somewhere else. And that's what leads to, I feel like all these people cheating, right? You hear all the men like, well, you know, she doesn't fuck me anymore. So I, and it's like, fuck off. Like, that's not an excuse to ever cheat. Like, did you bring this up to her? Have you had conversations? Have you gone to couples therapy? Have you worked on things? People are so lazy and people are so quick to just jump to the next thing because it's easier. It feels like, and guess what? If you got into a relationship with this person and you broke up with your boyfriend, I'm telling you, the same thing is probably going to happen.

• 50:08Speaker 00

  Because I'm, it does take two to tango of like, if you're not putting the effort in with your boyfriend, and I'm not fully blaming you, I'm just saying, it's going to happen again in another relationship. And how are you going to solve that? You need to put that amount of effort and more into your relationship. And it's a quick, easy fix at a bar and a night out and you, you know, you're flirting and all the things. But then life happens, right? People are, it's so crazy how like distracted we can all get by like the little shiny thing. And it's so temporary because real relationships are built on hard conversations and merging your lives and the reality of life, work, finances, family dynamics. And so when you're out at the bar, none of that exists.

• 50:53Speaker 00

  It's just physical attraction. It's just this, oh my gosh, you're hot, I'm hot, I'm feeling this. And then you wake up the next day and if you actually wanted a relationship with that person, then you're going to have to go through all the trudging of the mud that you've gotten through with your other, with your current partner. And so you've done the hard work and clearly you like this person. So actually I think it's so easy. The easiest part is to regain that little spark. Ooh, I need more attention. I want to feel sexy. I want to do the, easy. The, you've done the hard work. Now just pour into the relationship, right? In a way that makes you feel seen and him feel seen. All right, let's do one more. My close friends all moved across the country together where I stayed in the city where we originally lived after college.

• 51:36Speaker 00

  Whenever I visit, I feel pressured to justify my decision to stay by talking about how great my life here is still, because they talk about how much happier they are now in that other place. How do I stop seeking validation for a choice I know was right for me?

• 51:52Speaker 00

  Oh, this is like so relatable and annoying because I feel like when you're on the same page as your friends in college, it's just the best feeling. Like you're going to the dining hall together and you're going to the parties together and everything is just so, I mean, at the time it doesn't feel easy, but you look back and you're like, oh my God, it was so easy, right? It was so easy. We all had similar schedules and we had similar interests and we just did everything together. And then when you leave college, it feels so disorienting how that foundation almost immediately disappears and crumbles and everyone starts to go their own directions.

• 52:37Speaker 00

  And it's kind of really depressing in a way. You're like, oh my God, we were all joking about how, you know, it's going to be so fun to get out of here and start our lives. And although it is in some way nice to start my life, I miss that comfort. I miss that familiarity. And so the fact that you have stayed in the place that you guys all went to college, you're still in your familiar bubble, but you're growing and you're loving it and that's amazing. And them having left, I think something that makes your situation a little different maybe than others of just like, oh, I moved to this city and they moved to that city is like, there's a part of you, I think after college that like really wants to shed like, I'm not a college person anymore, right? Like I'm an adult.

• 53:22Speaker 00

  And I'm sure that they feel like when they're associating any conversation they're having about the city you guys went to school in, they're thinking about themselves in college. And I think that you have to separate that for yourself where like, they're not shitting on, you know, oh my God, I'm so much happier now that I live in Denver instead of Boston. Oh my God, Boston, like I was just like, oh my God, I could have never stayed there. Meanwhile, you're like, I literally still live here. I think what they're trying to probably say is it's more about themselves because let's be real, everyone only fucking cares about themselves. And so they're really having a self-reflective moment of like, I'm so much happier in Denver now because da, da, da, da, da. And they're comparing college them.

• 54:02Speaker 00

  Understandably, what they're not being thoughtful about is like, you're like, hey guys, so I still live here. And then you're having to over compromise and almost prove yourself like, but I've grown too, just because I've stayed in the same location, I've grown too. What it comes down to with friends in this moment is it feels like a rat race when you get out of college. It feels like you're all in the same line. And it starts a little bit in college where like, who got the internship or like, who did get the job out of college? Like it slowly begins, right? But then the minute, and there's a couple of people, little head right before you get out of college, because like they've got some job secured or they've got this or that, or maybe they have family money, so they've got the apartment and you still are going to have to live at home with your parents, whatever. It's a little bit of this.

• 54:47Speaker 00

  And then the minute college is over, everyone starts looking to their left and right to compare like, well, wait, she got the job and then I didn't get the job and I'm still living with my, and you're all in this comparison game. And it doesn't feel that overt, right? It doesn't feel that contentious, but it's there. Cause you're just looking lightly left to right, you're on social media, you're checking in. And so understandably, you're doing that with your friends right now. And because a group of them have left, you're feeling like it's like five V one. I think what you have to start to do when you see that group of friends is have confidence that you know who you are and that you made the right decision for yourself.

• 55:28Speaker 00

  And I almost would test you to be like, next time you're with that group and they bring up how much happier they are that they're not in Boston or wherever it is, you actually don't then match it with a, yeah, no, but like I've just been like, Boston has been like, just don't answer. Just say, I'm so happy for you. I'm so happy for you that you have found this place that is making you feel so fulfilled and happy. And then when they ask you, how are you doing? Then you can share and be honest. I'm really happy. I am shocked that I'm still so fulfilled in Boston. I've found such different areas since college and I did it up. But don't preemptively, almost like word vomit to defend yourself.

• 56:11Speaker 00

  And I think that goes past, obviously this dynamic that's like, obviously very specific. Anyone, when you're dealing with a friend group, the constant comparison almost can have you innately jumping to prove yourself. And then you leave and you're like, oh, I didn't really like that version of myself. Like, why was I being so like, try hard and like convincing them who I am and that I'm feeling good about myself? It kind of has nothing to do with them. It's, it's, you're clearly feeling a little insecure. So work on that. And then all of a sudden you won't care. Cause the best feeling is when you are so secure and you don't care that you're like, oh my God, girl. I know. I'm so happy I stayed in Boston and I know you literally hated it. I fucking love it.

• 56:55Speaker 00

  And it doesn't, it doesn't bother you. So anyone in friend dynamics, stop the knee jerk reaction to defend or to prove, stop yourself. And I think you'll start to find that they actually aren't really pressing half the time. It's you that's trying to engage. They don't really care. That's the, that's the most like eye opening experience you just continue to have as you progress in life and you get older and you have more experience is like, no one cares. No one cares. I was going to say about you. And I was like, that's not true, but like, kind of like, let me say it and then take it back.

• 57:40Speaker 00

  No one cares about you. No one really gives a shit what you're doing. No one actually gives a fuck. They're, everyone's focused on themselves. Yes, they care about you because you're their friend, but they don't actually care if you stay in Boston or you move to Denver. Would it be more convenient for them if you lived in Denver? For sure. But they're like, okay, well, she's still in Boston. Like, they don't actually care. And so you have to start to try to like, let yourself go of all these people's opinions on your own life. At the end of the day, you have to live with yourself the longest out of anyone in this world. That's the real facts. You're with you till the end, whenever that end is, okay? And so to try to placate and justify and you know, all these things for all these other

• 58:25Speaker 00

  people, when the reality is no one really gives a shit. You're going to spend your whole life constantly like, huh, huh, huh, huh. And then people are literally like, oh, I like forget, what did you do? And meanwhile, you're like, I spent so much energy making sure that they saw me in that moment. They didn't care. And when you start to realize that, put that amount of energy back into yourself, it's so much better. Life is just sweeter and easier and more enjoyable. And then you can just enjoy. And then it also prevents you when you do have assholes around you that kinda can seep in or try to make jab comments to make you feel insecure because they're insecure. Instead of making a snarky comment back, you literally are just like, oh, okay, wait,

• 59:07Speaker 00

  what do you want to get for dinner? Like, you literally don't care. And that is freedom. When you just kinda like relinquish all of the expectations and the, all the bullshit of comparison and projection and you're literally like, I fucking love my life. I love myself. I'm focused on myself and I'm not focused on anyone else thinks about me, nor am I really focused on what anyone else is doing, other than if they're my friend and I'm there to support them. But I still also don't really care what they're doing, as long as they're happy. The same goes for you. Stop treating your friends like their word is God, your word is God. What do you want? What makes you happy? So I hope that was an uplifting little sermon

• 59:46Speaker 00

  from your father. Um, I had such a lovely time this Sunday session. I am excited for, oh, we have, we have some good interviews coming up, you guys. We have some really good episodes. And I also have some really good Sunday session ideas. I hope you guys are liking these, you know, like hit you with a little truth at the beginning, something I've been thinking about, something I've been chewing on, you know, and then boom, get into questions of the week. But obviously, I always want your guys' opinions. So please write in if there's anything you want me to talk about on these episodes. If there's anything that you have been struggling with that you're like, ooh, I could use a little girl talk on this one, Alex. Um, and then also obviously always write in

• 1:00:25Speaker 00

  questions. I think a lot of times the questions in a beautiful way, they can be very specific, but there's always like a broader theme that does relate to so many women who are watching this. So I appreciate everyone. Obviously, all of your questions are always anonymous. All the names that I'm making up out of the top of my head, you know, they're fake. Um, so your secret is safe with me. All right, daddy gang. I love you so much. I will see you fuckers next Wednesday. Goodbye.

• 1:01:07Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own and creating looks and spaces just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home, drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches, Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life. Ross makes fashion accessible to all with up to 20 to 60% off other retailers' prices on the brands you love. Find your nearest Ross at rossstores.com. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Haagen Dazs. Okay, it is so important to take some me time. You know what I mean, guys? So take your sweet

• 1:01:48Speaker 00

  time and enjoy rich, smooth, creamy ice cream from Haagen Dazs. Because honestly, when was the last time you actually slowed down and let yourself have a moment for you? You have to try their new cherry dark chocolate bar. Guys, picture rich cherry ice cream with tart cherry ribbons coated in thick dark chocolate. Are you kidding me? I'm drooling. Are you drooling yet? No, seriously. This is the kind of thing you don't just eat, you experience it. Okay, Haagen Dazs elevated crafted ice cream is always meant to be savored. So whatever flavor you choose, slow down and enjoy each bite. Seriously, it's too good to rush. I grew up with Haagen Dazs in my house. Every single night, my family and I would eat our favorite flavors. I'm obsessed with the cherry

• 1:02:32Speaker 00

  dark chocolate bar. Those flavors together, I couldn't be happier. I'm gonna watch my favorite TV shows and I'm gonna be eating that. Boom, done. Take your sweet time. That's Dazs. Available at retailers nationwide. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by American Eagle. Okay, so fall is almost here and the new arrivals from American Eagle, kinda obsessed. We're talking sweet dresses, soft sweaters you'll want to live in, on-trend jeans and cargos you'll want to wear on repeat. And if you see a style you love, grab it now because you already know the good stuff doesn't stay in stock for long. You can check it all out at ae.com or just go to the store.