Heather McMahan: Dog Shows, Neck Lifts & Airport Fits

Join Alex in the studio for a hilarious and completely unhinged conversation with Heather McMahan. From hot takes on millennial trends to how her Pitbull obsession led to a Guinness World Record, Heather shares the wild stories that could ONLY happen to her. She also talks about her wildest medical stories, from ovarian torsion mid-flight to getting back on camera just days after a neck lift.. Enjoy!

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Bright by Scotch Bright. Daddy gang, a lot of us obviously take pride in where we live, right? We want the decor to look good and then we want the lighting and the cleaning and all of it. And you want it to look spotless and you want it to look really nice, right? So level up your clean routine with Bright's line of sponges. Use the palm scrubber with a comfy grip for serious scrubs, the easy to fill, leak proof dish wand to keep hands out of the mess, or the scrub and wipe for a scrubbing side and a sud-sing side. All three look good, scrub great, and they come with handy drain and dry stands that are super compact and cute.

• 0:40Speaker 00

  Hook yourself up, boost it with Bright. Shop now. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Klaviyo. So Klaviyo says it's your brand's best friend. Both claim, but here's the thing, Klaviyo knows your brand, your tone, your customers, all your data in one place. Klaviyo's AI agents answer them 24/7 in your voice and build your campaigns from one prompt, emails, texts, and WhatsApp. Plus Klaviyo finds your next sale before you do. It's time to meet your new CRM BFF. Go to K L A V I Y O dot com slash best friends.

• 1:18Speaker 01

  Nowadays, you have certain expectations when you fly, like people napping on the airport floor or flying in your pajamas. You know what you don't expect? Free drinks. But now, T-Mobile members get a free premium drink when they fly Delta Airlines. So just sit back, relax, and switch to T-Mobile today. Visit t-mobile.com/membership for details. It's better over here. Get a free premium Delta drink with eligible plan and link SkyMiles account 24 hours before qualifying. Flight required. Must be 21 or older. See T life for terms.

• 1:48Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Uber. Uber just introduced a new feature called Women Preferences, which lets women riders request a woman driver directly in the app. It's honestly an amazing feature that gives women more control over their rides. Sometimes we all just want a ride that feels a little more comfortable and chill. So if you haven't used it yet, Uber's new Women Preferences feature is available now in the Uber app. Learn more on the Uber app.

• 2:17Speaker 00

  What is up daddy gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper with Call Her Daddy.

• 2:26Speaker 02

  So I had to go to this fucking brunch before this. That's why I'm dressed like I'm running for Congress. Okay. I went to this brunch, which is cool, like women in television and film. First of all, this is the most LA shit. There was no food. It wasn't a brunch. They passed around two plates of oysters. You know what you're not eating at 11 a.m.? An oyster at a pass order, you can't eat an oyster. I'm like, so tell me, like, what TV shows are you selling? You can't do that.

• 2:50Speaker 00

  Also, for an oyster on a plate, you're like, how long has it been sitting there? It's warm.

• 2:54Speaker 02

  And it's all women too. So seeing a bunch of women just like slurring down oysters. So I had to like emergency stop at Air One. I'm sweating my ass off. I have a fresh spray tan. I'm disgusting. So I just want you to know, I am, I know I look like I'm running for Congress.

• 3:09Speaker 00

  You, oh, you've

• 3:10Speaker 02

  And I might, I might get into politics.

• 3:11Speaker 00

  No, no, I'm not gonna lie. When you came in here, I was like, oh, maybe she's really, she's really taking herself seriously right now. This, this leg of you doing your press, you are showing up and you're showing out. Heather McMahon, welcome to Call Her Daddy.

• 3:25Speaker 02

  Hi honey, how are you?

• 3:26Speaker 00

  Actually, welcome back.

• 3:27Speaker 02

  Welcome back. How are you?

• 3:29Speaker 00

  I am just so happy to see you.

• 3:31Speaker 02

  I'm happy to see you.

• 3:32Speaker 00

  I was like needing a little Heather in my life and I knew you would just come in and just give me everything I needed. I also, again, I was shocked to see you in this because I was like, what is she up to? Like, what have I been missing? You kind of, give me your, give me why you're gonna run for Congress. Let's go.

• 3:50Speaker 02

  Well, first of all, my slogan is McMahon can and she will. And all you need to know is, I am here to change the world because no one's gonna do it for us, gal. So I'll roll up my sleeves on my oversized Zara blazer. Let's do this. No, but also, I think, can I be, can I be honest with you? I've had people that are kind of high up and I, you know, yeah, like Illuminati adjacent, you know, I'm kidding. But they've been like, so when are you gonna run for something in the state of Georgia? And I'm like, oh yeah, okay, cool. And they're like, no, no, no, for real, when are you gonna run? And I'm just, I told them, I was like, I don't really want to have to cage fight Marjorie Taylor Greene, but I think that might be what I have to do next.

• 4:26Speaker 00

  Heather, the way that this could even take your career to that next level.

• 4:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:31Speaker 00

  Because we're seeing it. Like, we've got a president, he's been on reality TV.

• 4:35Speaker 02

  I don't know if I want that trajectory.

• 4:39Speaker 02

  I don't know if I'm aligned with those values, but yes, I do, I think I would be able to summon all of the women at my country club and be like, get your shit together. Vote how you want to vote, bitch. I have a great spray tan. I have on an oversized suit jacket and my pants are tight every day of my life. I also recently got a gout. I don't know if you know this, but I

• 5:00Speaker 00

  Wait, wait, why, what, and can you explain what gout is?

• 5:03Speaker 02

  No one knows. I woke up in the middle of the night. I get up to pee. I stumbled to the floor. Cannot walk. And I think, oh my God, like, did I hurt myself? Was I sleepwalking? What happened? I go to the orthopedist, I get an MRI. I'm like, what happened? I think I hurt myself. The guy's like, it could be gout. And I'm like, okay, yeah, all right. And gout is traditionally like the king's disease. You get, kings would get it back in the day from eating like rich liver and heavy foods and drinking wine all the time. And I was like, how fucking dare you? I'm on a GLP-1. Go fuck yourself. There's no way I have fucking gout. And I was like chewing out the orthopedist. And then I literally am out to dinner the next day and I'm having a glass of wine and one of the nurse practitioners comes up to me, she goes, hey, girl, I'm pretty sure, she's like, I waited on you yesterday. We're 99% sure you have gout.

• 5:47Speaker 02

  She's like, you shouldn't be drinking red wine. And what are you eating? I was like, pate.

• 5:50Speaker 00

  Does it make your foot look weird?

• 5:52Speaker 02

  No, you basically feel like it's gonna fall off. It can hit your joints. It's basically, what I, from what I understand medically, you get a surplus of uric acid. Now, this is the irony of all of it. And I don't know if I'm right on this, but the one week I had a gout flare up for the first time, which I've never had this in my life, I was meal prepping. I was eating ground turkey, steamed rice, and broccoli like a motherfucker. And, and somebody DM'd me and they're like, Heather, if you have too much ground turkey, that can build up your uric acid. So I want you to know, you are damned if you do, damned if you don't.

• 6:22Speaker 00

  You're, this motherfucker's trying to eat healthy, trying to meal prep, and then you get gout?

• 6:27Speaker 02

  I had been in Italy the weeks prior, just going hard in the paint on some nitrate meat and cheese, but either way.

• 6:35Speaker 00

  But that doesn't fit the storyline that I'm trying to sell. So just fuck off.

• 6:38Speaker 02

  So nice and dramatic. If I'm like, this is so me though. If it isn't an eczema flare up, it's a gout flare up. My God.

• 6:44Speaker 00

  Now, can I ask you? So, third special.

• 6:48Speaker 02

  Third special.

• 6:48Speaker 00

  Coming out. Hulu?

• 6:50Speaker 02

  Hulu.

• 6:52Speaker 00

  By a thread.

• 6:53Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 6:54Speaker 00

  And is this meaning like hanging on by a thread?

• 6:56Speaker 02

  Without a doubt. Emotionally, I'm hanging on by a thread. My clothes have maxed out on thread count. You know what I mean? Like, I don't put anything in the dryer. It's done. Like, there is nowhere, we can't expand anymore. Um, just every, we're, we're all seriously, I mean, I hate to take some of your catchphrases, but we're all unwell. We're all hanging on by a thread. Because as women, we are either doing too much, not enough, we can't figure out what the right equation is for how we're supposed to move in the atmosphere, out in the world. We're damned if we do, damned if we don't. So we're all hanging on by a thread.

• 7:29Speaker 00

  And during this time, you're traveling a lot, right?

• 7:33Speaker 02

  All the time.

• 7:33Speaker 00

  Because you went, you obviously were, you know, you're doing this special, then you're going on tour, then you're also now promoting this. How's travel been? Do we have our travel outfits? What are we like on the airplane? Like, I want to hear, like, who is Heather McMahon getting onto an airplane? If I was sitting next to you, what are you up to?

• 7:49Speaker 02

  What do I look like on a plane? I try and hold my shit together because my family was in aviation. Like, my grandfather's chief pilot for Delta for a long time. So I try and at least have on like a blazer, right? I will have on a rag and bone pajama jean and a tank top and no bra. Like, I'm struggling.

• 8:04Speaker 00

  Wait, you wear

• 8:05Speaker 02

  I sometimes wear an oversized blazer. I'm very into oversized blazers. And if you have as large a shoulders as I do, they're not very flattering.

• 8:12Speaker 00

  This is the last thing I thought you were gonna say. You're rolling, Heather McMahon's rolling onto a plane in a blazer.

• 8:19Speaker 02

  I do need to tell you something. I have the highest status at Delta that one human could possibly ever achieve. And it is my greatest joy in my life to say that. And I love nothing more than to walk onto a, uh, an airplane with my Bottega bag and my 360 and Million Miler and Diamond Medallion tags just like clinking, like just

• 8:38Speaker 00

  And they say, thank you. Thank you, Ms. McMahon, for all of your points.

• 8:41Speaker 02

  Yeah. Do you know how many times I've had certain flight attendants come over and they're like, we don't have, we don't have many females and, and like at your level on our flight today.

• 8:50Speaker 00

  And your dick just grows.

• 8:51Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. I love it. No, I do. Growing up, you couldn't look like a slob kebab on a flight. You did have to pull it together. Now, I'm sure there are plenty of people who've seen me out in the wild that are gonna say, wow, she looked like shit. But I'll always have a blazer or like a, some sort of jacket that I can put on to, because again, if I'm running for Congress, you never know when you have to step in and change policy.

• 9:12Speaker 00

  And in case the pilot comes out and wants to say hi to you personally.

• 9:15Speaker 02

  Needs me to co-pilot with them. I'm ready to jump in at a moment's notice. I always have a captain's hat in my bag as well.

• 9:21Speaker 00

  Are you drinking on planes or?

• 9:25Speaker 02

  No, no. No, first of all, anybody, you don't drink on an airplane. Now, if I'm going international, I may, I may limit myself to a champagne, a glass of red wine, but there is no worse hangover than a high altitude hangover. You don't do it. I have a ginger ale, I have a Coke Zero, and I chug a bunch of fucking electrolytes. I put on my Delta 360 compression socks. I don't even know if I'm supposed to say I'm in this exclusive club, but I put on my compression socks like a grandma and I make, because I got gout, you know what I mean? I can't, I can't also get a blood clot. Come on, Alex.

• 9:54Speaker 00

  Oh my God. I don't know why. This is nice to hear something. I really didn't expect this of you.

• 9:59Speaker 02

  When you have as many flare ups as I do, you just always have like a bag. Like I've always got a amoxicillin, a Z pack, a steroid pack. I've got stuff. If you get a UTI, if you have a yeast infection, if you lose a limb, if you need to grow a limb, I have some sort of tincture in my bag for you.

• 10:15Speaker 00

  Nurse Heather.

• 10:16Speaker 02

  Nurse Heather. Yeah.

• 10:16Speaker 00

  Now, let's talk about your dogs for a second.

• 10:19Speaker 02

  Oh, I love this.

• 10:20Speaker 00

  Because I'm thinking about it. You're traveling a lot. You've got to leave your dogs. Macaroni and Rigatoni.

• 10:25Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 10:26Speaker 00

  Those are their names.

• 10:27Speaker 02

  They sure are.

• 10:28Speaker 00

  Boy or girl?

• 10:29Speaker 02

  Uh, so it's macaroni, uh, lamone Ferrari Daniels. And then it's Rigatoni cannoli Gandolfini Daniels. So Riggs is a boy, Max is a girl.

• 10:36Speaker 00

  Now, what are we doing if we have a third? Are we going tortellini? Are we going?

• 10:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, we probably go tortellini. Also like ravioli. I think that's fun. Rabs cute. I love a risotto. I think risotto is fun.

• 10:45Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 10:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, Rizy.

• 10:46Speaker 00

  Rizy. So can you do, cause I will never do it, but could you grace me with like, what's your dog voice?

• 10:54Speaker 02

  My dog voice?

• 10:55Speaker 00

  Are you, are you becoming a baby?

• 10:57Speaker 02

  My dog was like, get over here. I have French bulldog.

• 11:01Speaker 00

  Riggy.

• 11:01Speaker 02

  No, literally like Riggs, Mac, quit attacking the gardener. Get in here right now. No, I mean, I am, I, they're the loves of my life. And because I'm not with child yet. Also, I have a bone to pick with you. I'm going to tell you in just a second. But I am, I am the overbearing dog mom. And that's how I know like I'd be a great regular mom because Jeff says I'm a sociopath. And I also like, I'm smelling the skin. I'm cleaning the ears. I love them. I bite them. I love.

• 11:25Speaker 00

  Here it comes.

• 11:26Speaker 02

  Yeah. Here's your dog voice. I want to just take you. I sometimes saw Rigatoni. I'm like, I want to unzip your little belly. I want to crawl in and I want to hug your heart. And Jeff's like, whoa, Hannibal.

• 11:36Speaker 00

  Wait, I love also your lips kind of curl in.

• 11:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. I, I lose my upper lip and I'm like, I love you so much. Okay. Hold on. Can we talk about something?

• 11:43Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 11:44Speaker 02

  Real quick. Speaking of motherhood. I love that you've been filling these baby registries. These baby lists are fantastic.

• 11:49Speaker 00

  Girl, I, it has been honestly the joy of my life seeing these women. It's really been incredible. I just want you to know that now I have women DMing me. A woman who's actively openly talked about infertility. And how many times she's fucked up IVF, asking me to fill their baby list. And so of course I'm like, I'm, I was filling out teacher list. Like I'm happy to give back. And then I see a couple of these women and I click on this one girl. I'm like, this bitch goes to my country club. She would have $3,000 sno bassinet on there. I said, you don't need my money, Carol. I'm not fucking filling your list, bitch.

• 12:24Speaker 02

  That is so your life. And you're like, babe, you drive a full Range Rover. I said, I literally saw you at Mahjong four hours ago. You are the richest person at this club. I'm not filling your baby list. Call your husband. It's not my job.

• 12:46Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by ZipRecruiter. Okay. So picture this. You are sitting down for a dinner on a first date. Drinks are ordered, food's on the way, and you're actually excited about this person. But now it's time. We've done the small talk and now we have to ask this man the real hard questions like, are you looking for something serious? Have you had a girlfriend before? Do you have a headboard? Or are you still rocking navy blue sheets? You gotta ask the right questions early to see if someone is actually right for you, right? And daddy gang, the same thing goes for hiring. That is why you need ZipRecruiter.

• 13:28Speaker 00

  When you post a job, ZipRecruiter suggests screening questions to help you basically find top candidates faster. And today you can try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/daddy. No wonder ZipRecruiter is the number one rated hiring site based on G2. Ask questions and hire faster with ZipRecruiter. Four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/daddy. That's ziprecruiter.com/daddy. Meet your match on ZipRecruiter.

• 14:09Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ritual. It seems like everything is connected to your gut microbiome. Don't you feel like that, guys? We're just hearing that constantly. Like, well, it always goes back to the gut health. And I'm like, oh, okay. So it's the gut health. But did you know the gut microbiome shifts during pregnancy? Yeah, these are the things I've recently learned, guys. And these shifts can impact mom and baby's health in pregnancy and postpartum. Yes, these are things I've recently learned. Okay? And that is why Ritual created Nadel Biotic, a specialized biotic with clinically studied strains for pregnancy and postpartum microbiome support to support digestive health, mood, vaginal health, and baby's immune health. Here's the thing, guys, as I've been pregnant,

• 14:53Speaker 00

  I have just become so aware of my health. Obviously I got diagnosed with gestational diabetes. And so my entire day is just consisting of how can I take care of this baby? And with Ritual, I feel so set up to do that. And I feel way less overwhelmed with trying to Google things that I'm like, what does this mean? Ritual kind of just does it all for you. So whether you're pregnant, postpartum, or you're looking for everyday trusted daily gut support, get clinically studied biotics to support your gut health with Ritual. My listeners can save 25% on their first month at ritual.com/callherdaddy. That's ritual.com/callherdaddy for 25% off your first month.

• 15:37Speaker 00

  These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

• 15:46Speaker 00

  Okay, let's talk about also getting shitted on.

• 15:48Speaker 02

  Yeah. Okay. Hard pivot.

• 15:50Speaker 00

  Well, yeah, I guess not technically, but I do want to kind of talk about this experience because from what I understand, it didn't go as planned. So.

• 15:59Speaker 02

  Which one? Which part of experience in my life didn't go as planned?

• 16:01Speaker 00

  So you recently hosted the American Kennel Club Best in Show Dog Show.

• 16:09Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 16:10Speaker 00

  And I want to first understand, I obviously know you have your two dogs, but like what qualified you for this?

• 16:16Speaker 02

  Nothing. Um, well, you know, so I wasn't hosting the actual, like the, the live prize. I was basically hired to go into all the behind the scenes interviews and host and get to know all the breeders and everybody, like all the vets and all the groomers and all this.

• 16:30Speaker 00

  You're a host. You're a host.

• 16:31Speaker 02

  I'm running around. I'm being the people's princess. I think I wore this exact blazer. And I'm walking around the Orlando Convention Center and I'm fresh off of anesthesia because I got my neck done.

• 16:41Speaker 00

  Slow down. How did this opportunity then come to you? Like, did you get an email? Did you like?

• 16:47Speaker 02

  Somebody called my manager. The company called my manager and they said, we know that Heather is, you know, a big fan of dogs. Uh, you know, she likes to put on the dog, which is a saying that we say in the South when you get like fully dressed, like, like right now I put on the dog. When you're in full hair and makeup, you're putting on the dog.

• 17:02Speaker 00

  Oh, that's a saying.

• 17:03Speaker 02

  That's a saying.

• 17:03Speaker 00

  You're putting on the dog.

• 17:04Speaker 02

  You're putting on the dog. Um, and so they reached out to my manager and my manager called me and I was like, I was just recuperating from a neck job. So I am, I'm maybe a week out of a neck, a neck lift. And I called it, my manager called me and said, hey, this is a great opportunity. I said, okay, but you know, I'm not going to do this right now because I'm taking a break.

• 17:23Speaker 00

  Hold on.

• 17:23Speaker 02

  You know, I'm on maternity leave, if you will.

• 17:25Speaker 00

  What's a neck job?

• 17:26Speaker 02

  I got a little, I got a little nip and tuck under here. Okay.

• 17:31Speaker 00

  And did they like cut in like this?

• 17:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, they cut behind your ears and then they like, just pull this up a little bit. So I, nothing has been done to my face. I just want to make that very clear. I have never had lip filler. I've only gotten a little botox. Like I've already got a full face.

• 17:44Speaker 00

  So it's like a, it's so it's like a neck lift.

• 17:46Speaker 02

  Sort of. And then they like do a little liposuction. I just, at one point, like I would look at myself on camera and there was no like definition between under here and then my shoulder blades. It was, I was starting to look like Big Ed from 90 Day Fiance. And I just at that point was like, I'm, I have too pretty of a face to then not also have a neck.

• 18:05Speaker 00

  So first of all, you're gorgeous. Second of all, did you go under? Like you were dead asleep.

• 18:10Speaker 02

  Dead asleep.

• 18:10Speaker 00

  So you are then going through recovery and you decide to take on this gig. Now, did you tell your doctor that you were going to do this?

• 18:19Speaker 02

  No. Uh, no. Cause again, I don't know if you know this, but because I'm wearing a white silk jacket, I do have, one of my friends who's a doctor says I have white coat, a short white coat syndrome, which means I'm basically am a medical professional. So not only am I running for Congress, I'm also hosting dog shows and I am a medical professional.

• 18:36Speaker 00

  You're a doctor.

• 18:36Speaker 02

  I'm a doctor. I was fine, but I basically, I have open wounds. I have drains. I think they had just taken out my drains. But it's like, I mean, it's gnarly. Like I have dried blood down the back of my neck and I go to, to host this dog show. I put myself in a casual turtleneck. Cause there's one thing you need to know about me, Alex. Okay. The show must go on. I am old showbiz. I enjoy a challenge and I was supposed to take off a full month. Like I'm not on the road. I, I batch my podcast. I'm like, I'm not doing any of this. And then I heard that, you know, the, the check was really good. So I said, get a flight to Orlando. We got, we got work to do.

• 19:08Speaker 00

  Pull the drains out.

• 19:10Speaker 02

  And if you've never been to a dog show, it is the wildest experience. And that's what I love, especially in comedy. I love studying people. I love characters. I love creatures. And if you've never been on your hands and knees at the Orlando Convention Center, tongue to tongue with the Pomeranian, then you have not lived your life to the fullest.

• 19:25Speaker 00

  I can't even fathom what a dog show was like.

• 19:27Speaker 02

  Everybody kind of starts to look like their dog. And I, I have the exact same body as a French bulldog too. Like the more I look at Rigatoni, I'm like, oh, I get it. You came out of me. I mean, he has no neck. He has the broadest little thickest middle. And then he has the tiniest, skinniest legs and ankles and the cutest little tight tush. Like I am built like a Frenchy.

• 19:44Speaker 00

  Stop. So you, so you roll up here.

• 19:47Speaker 02

  And mind you, I am so chill. I am doing great interviews.

• 19:50Speaker 00

  Are you on drugs?

• 19:51Speaker 02

  Yes. Cause I'm off the cuff. I'm literally, you know, I took like a muscle relaxer. And I, and again, I literally have dried blood underneath my neck and I'm asking my makeup artist, I'm like, shade the neck. Like I am so swollen.

• 20:00Speaker 00

  And you're in Orlando in a turtleneck.

• 20:02Speaker 02

  In a turtleneck. It was December and I had the time of my life.

• 20:05Speaker 00

  Oh, so you just thrive.

• 20:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:07Speaker 00

  And even though like, do you remember any of it?

• 20:09Speaker 02

  I, I do. I do remember it, but it was, it was a great time. And I was, I was riding a high. I'm like, here I am. I, I am woman. Hear me roar. You can't put me down. Like you, muscle relaxer can't hold me back. No, I was, it was wild, but I liked to work. I love to work.

• 20:23Speaker 00

  Okay. You love to work. So this went well.

• 20:25Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 20:26Speaker 00

  Even though you had the drains and the blood and the turtleneck and the muscle relaxers, she did her job. She did it great. Love it.

• 20:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:34Speaker 00

  Now we've got to talk about the Ryder Cup.

• 20:36Speaker 02

  Oh my God. Hard pivot.

• 20:37Speaker 00

  I don't even know where to begin because, okay, let's, let's start this slow.

• 20:42Speaker 02

  This is where the dramatic music needs to cut in.

• 20:44Speaker 00

  Yeah. Look slowly like we're going to build. Okay?

• 20:46Speaker 02

  You thought gout was serious? Here we go.

• 20:47Speaker 00

  This is an international crisis that this woman sitting across from me completely stirred up. Now let's get into it.

• 20:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:55Speaker 00

  Before we get into the drama, let's set the scene a little bit.

• 20:57Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 20:58Speaker 00

  You get offered to, you know, work the Ryder Cup. And in what capacity? Another like hosting gig?

• 21:05Speaker 02

  Yes. Uh, the night before the big event happened, I was the emcee and hosted for this, for all the like, uh, what was it? It was just like a night for all the sponsors.

• 21:15Speaker 00

  Perfect.

• 21:15Speaker 02

  Nail it, crush it. Great.

• 21:17Speaker 00

  Of course.

• 21:17Speaker 02

  I'm having the time of my life.

• 21:18Speaker 00

  Now.

• 21:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:19Speaker 00

  How did Jeff feel about you getting to do this? Like, is he a big golf guy?

• 21:23Speaker 02

  We are the biggest golf fans. And so I want people to understand, I am the biggest golf fan. I went to the last Ryder Cup in Italy. We are friends with a lot of professional golfers. We follow golf to the T. That's our sport.

• 21:33Speaker 00

  So this is like in your pocket. You couldn't be more excited.

• 21:36Speaker 02

  I couldn't be more excited. I was honored that they asked me because I thought, wow, like, it's all kind of coming together. It's very, this is kismet. I'm getting to be around all my golf buddies. I'm getting to give Jeff, you know, as I call it in sports, like, behind the ropes, like inside the ropes. He's gonna have this moment. And it's really cool because it's a very patriotic event. It's Europe versus America. And the last Ryder Cup was in Italy and Jeff and I are like, you know, spoon feeding each other Parmesan cheese and ham while we're watching our favorite buddies like play golf. It was amazing. It was an incredible event.

• 22:07Speaker 00

  So now you're working it. And it's like, and then finally, your, your husband's like, this is so cool that like, this is the cool things that like, my wife gets to do that. I actually get to reap the benefits and I actually care about this one.

• 22:16Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 22:16Speaker 00

  So you're there. You're in it. Now, it seems like somehow from the excitement, and then there was a hard pivot to this almost like catastrophic falling out that happened with the golf community whom I know you love and you want desperately to be a part of. What happened, Heather?

• 22:40Speaker 02

  You know, I'll get to my life lessons that I learned from this in a second, but I really realized very quickly, I didn't know what I was hired for.

• 22:48Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 22:49Speaker 02

  And I get out there and so I'm supposed to host this thing called the first tee. The first tee is the first tee box at a sporting event, specifically, obviously, a golfing event, where you have the big grandstand, the crowds, and then all the guys come out from both teams and they tee off and you, and it's like the first tee box, it's, it's kickoff, baby. Okay? Um, and I get out there. I also didn't realize at my call time, I saw 4:45. I was like, oh, it's in the afternoon. This will be a fun afternoon gig. It's 4:45 in the morning. So we're watching the sunrise over Bethpage Black, which is the, the golf course we were at, out in Long Island. And I am dressed head to toe and like Ralph Lauren. I'm in a pair of men's 10 and a half loafers. Like, we are slipping and sliding on the, the mossy green. We are doing the most. And I have a microphone and I, I don't fully

• 23:34Speaker 02

  know what I'm supposed to do. There's a DJ. Now, I knew I wasn't on television, which before I accepted the job, I was like, oh, that's a bummer. I thought I was gonna get to do some funny commentary and like, interview some celebs that were coming, because it's a huge, huge, really insane, amazing event. So I thought that I would be using my red carpet interview experience to talk to people, talk to the players, maybe interview the coaches. I get out there and immediately realize I'm a glorified court jester. I am a clown. My, you know, I've got 17 layers of Ralph Lauren sweaters on. Dudes are like, let me shoot them boobs. Like, I would show you my boobs, but it would take 45 minutes for me to get off these layers of Ralph Lauren. Um, and I can handle it. Like, listen, I do comedy. I can handle crowds and unruly people and drunk people. But it, my husband

• 24:16Speaker 02

  had warned me and he had warned me not to take this job. And, and, and I should have not taken it. He said, Heather, this is such a cool event, but I don't think that you know what you're going into. My husband, who is from New York, was like, New York sports fans are feral. They're, and, and Long Island fans are even more feral. So I get out there and I didn't realize that everybody had been drinking. I mean, these guys are drinking from the night before, you know, and they're in costume. Like, it's a very exciting event, but it turned very quickly.

• 24:42Speaker 00

  And also, like, again, to maybe the girlies that aren't familiar, but we know, like, golf is a very prestigious sport and it is supposed to be quiet and you're, you're very respectful.

• 24:52Speaker 02

  But not the Ryder Cup.

• 24:53Speaker 00

  Not this.

• 24:54Speaker 02

  The Ryder Cup is like, we're playing your, it's rowdy and it's fun.

• 24:57Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 24:57Speaker 02

  But of course, Long Island took it to a whole nother level.

• 25:00Speaker 00

  So that gives context, like, this is not a normal golf event.

• 25:03Speaker 02

  No, we're not at the Masters. And I go to the Masters every year because I follow my friends who play golf. And again, I mind my Ps and Qs. I'm a lady who knows how to work a, a ballroom in a country club. I know how to act. Okay. But so, and this is the thing that people don't realize. So one of the coaches comes out and he gets on the mic and he's like, let's fucking go. And one of my producers says, start that chant. You could go for it. So I'm like, are you sure? I can curse? He's like, yeah, go for it. And so I'm like, let's fucking go. Let's fucking go. You know, boys, sports, let's it. So I'm saying this. I give the green light that I can curse. And then I get out there and I start to chant with like, one of the other golfers' names. I've got this professional cheer, male cheerleaders are out there with me. Everybody's like, boo, shut the fuck up, you know? I'm shoving t-shirts in a t-shirt cannon, launching them out into

• 25:47Speaker 02

  the audience. I'm like, no, no, no. I am actually a mascot right now. I wish they would have put a bag over my head and made me dress up like Lady Liberty. That would have been easier than what I had to do.

• 25:58Speaker 00

  Heather, like, I have to give you so much credit because as a woman, being one of the very few women in that situation, like, you're, you're, that's intimidating as fuck. So you're just trying to like, get through.

• 26:10Speaker 02

  Where it takes a pivot and I get in trouble is, you know, I'm starting chants. I'm looking at my producer. I'm like, what do you want me to do? Like, I am, I basically should have had a laser pointer, like cat, like a, like I was trying to herd cats. That's what I was, what I was doing. And it was kind of mortifying at one point because I'm like, I'm not being funny. I'm not able to really do crowd work. I mean, you know what it's like to do crowd work at 5 o'clock in the morning with dudes who are like, just took Jägerbombs? You're like, this isn't working. So then a bunch of the guys in the crowd started a chant about one of the European players and they're just like, fuck you, Rory, about Rory McIlroy. I hear this and I'm like, this is, I'm like, I'm laughing at myself at this point. And so I say it back in the microphone and immediately was fired.

• 26:52Speaker 02

  And here's the wild thing.

• 26:53Speaker 00

  You were fired on the spot?

• 26:55Speaker 02

  On the spot. So one of the representatives from Team Europe comes over and he starts screaming at me. And he's like-

• 27:01Speaker 00

  In your ear?

• 27:02Speaker 02

  No, no, no. He's yelling at me in person. I don't think I've ever been yelled at like this in my life. He's like, I don't care what you say, but you can't say anything about the European players. And I said, dude, I totally get it. I'm doing the best I can. Heard, understood. Now I know my parameters. Like, I took it in that moment and I was like, I got it. I said, I'm a loose cannon out here. Nobody knows what's going on. So then, like, 10 minutes later, I, somebody taps me on the shoulder and they're like, we need your credentials. Team Europe wants you gone. And I was like, are you kidding me? Alex, I've never been fired from a job in my life. Heather, I am a, I am a, literally, like, I'm student council. Do you know what I mean?

• 27:38Speaker 00

  I am. You are running for state over here. Like, you are, you are going political. Hold on.

• 27:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:47Speaker 00

  I didn't realize you got fucking fired on the spot.

• 27:50Speaker 02

  Yes. And they said, and that was the thing, I, I got brought back into a room and I said, listen, guys, I am mortified right now. I'm doing the best I can, but you, nobody told me what my parameter, like, I was, I fucked up and I immediately apologized. I said, I'm so sorry. I read the room wrong. I apologize. I, I immediately apologized. And they're like, you're good, you're good, you're good. But here was the wild thing. I want to just say, I don't condone any of the behavior. Rory had it really tough later on in the afternoon. I don't want to speak to his experience, but these guys have been drinking since the ass crack of dawn. The sun was coming up, they were partying. These guys, by the time he goes out for his afternoon match, which he played with one of our friends, like, these people are yelling shit, they're throwing beers, they're being assholes.

• 28:29Speaker 00

  Assholes.

• 28:30Speaker 02

  So what really fucked me up was I immediately apologized and said, hey, I don't think you got the right guy for this gig because I don't even know what my job title is here. And then when people started to blame me, and I'm by no means a victim, but when people started to blame me for the behavior of men 10 hours later who had been drinking, I don't know if you know this, but I show up to work sober. Okay? I was, had a, you know, two iced coffees and a granola bar and had greased up and was ready to go and do my job.

• 28:57Speaker 00

  In a loafer.

• 28:59Speaker 02

  In a loafer. So that was tough. And then I'm seeing this and then, you know, I'm having some existential crisis, like, fuck did, you know, am, am, am I the reason why these guys are acting like this? And my husband was like, no, fuck this, Heather.

• 29:11Speaker 00

  No, no, no.

• 29:12Speaker 02

  Like, no. I, I wrote an apology letter to Rory. I hope it like, got through his, to his agents, through Team Europe. Like, I said, I'm so sorry. Like, I was doing the best I can.

• 29:19Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 29:19Speaker 02

  But I fucked up. I definitely apologized. So I wake up and I think nothing of it. And then I immediately, it's like, all over the headlines. And it just like, the headlines are like, McIlroy versus McMahon. Like, we had some like, deep beef.

• 29:29Speaker 00

  Meanwhile, Jeff is like, babe, do you remember when I said, maybe you shouldn't take this job?

• 29:33Speaker 02

  Yeah. Jeff, Jeff told me not to do it. He said, let's just go and be spectators and enjoy it. And I, and I, lesson learned. But I did say, if there was a male comedian out there, we would never have this conversation.

• 29:42Speaker 00

  No.

• 29:43Speaker 02

  We would never, they'd be, you know, he would rip his shirt off and be like, fuck Europe.

• 29:47Speaker 00

  Yeah. And then like, and they're like, they're trying to take my credential. Go fuck yourself.

• 29:51Speaker 02

  Fuck yourself.

• 29:51Speaker 00

  And it would have gone viral in a good way.

• 29:52Speaker 02

  And he would have been a hero. But I did learn in that, in that moment, I have been so, I even so go with the flow. I am so happy to work. I love working. I love what I do. At the end of the day, let's like, let's break down what I do. I'm a fucking comic. Okay? I'm here to bring joy and levity. That's what it is. So we're not like, we're not solving problems. And I was like, yeah, I'm go with the flow. I'm go with the flow. Whatever you guys need, jump in. I just was so excited to be there and I should have asked questions. And as a woman in the business, it's really hard because if you ask too many questions, it's she's difficult.

• 30:23Speaker 00

  Uh huh.

• 30:23Speaker 02

  She's hard to work with. You don't want to do this. And I've had people tell me, Heather, you couldn't be a bitch if you tried. And now I'm in my bitch era. You know, I don't, I don't give a shit anymore. I'm just like, I want to know what the ask is because I will always show up with, putting on the dog, suited and booted, prepared. I am a wild professional. I don't party before my shows. I'm doing deep breath exercises backstage. I have prepared a full one woman show. Like, that's what I pride myself on. And it is wild to see how many people just half-ass every gig in this business and they keep getting called back. So, but I did learn, I'm like, you, as a woman, I said, I will never put myself in a position, moving forward, where I'm not like, what is, I want to know every dotted line.

• 31:02Speaker 00

  So true.

• 31:03Speaker 02

  What, what is asked of me?

• 31:04Speaker 00

  Oh, you know what? We ne, we never expect to have to have like, a big, good, um, takeaway from our episodes. We like to have fun. But I do, but I do like this for women's sake. I do like this for women to be like, guys, if you don't know what the fuck you're being asked.

• 31:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:19Speaker 00

  It is not embarrassing to slow it down.

• 31:21Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:22Speaker 00

  And ask. Now.

• 31:23Speaker 02

  Amen. Here we go.

• 31:24Speaker 00

  Pivoting back.

• 31:32Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Revolve. You know, I'm a father and now I'm also a mother. Okay. I'm not gonna lie. I don't think my entire style is gonna change now that I'm a mom, but like, I'm definitely looking at some more sweaters than going out tops. I know, what a concept. And I'm like liking my like, I'm evolving. Okay, we're growing. Okay. And so I'm constantly looking for good little outfits to put together for a date night where I'm like, okay, I can be with the baby and then I can go and still have my husband be like, damn, Alex, you look great. There's, there's gonna be a balance. And whether you're building for your future hot mom wardrobe, or you're just trying to honestly find pieces that make you feel put together,

• 32:15Speaker 00

  that are still comfortable, then you will love Revolve. Okay, I have been on Revolve. Also, the shipping is incredible. All of it's incredible. But when you're shopping on Revolve, basically, you're able to find curated outfits in a way that makes getting dressed easier. Once you find something on the website that you like, my favorite thing about this website is you then also can find similar options. So you can basically build the entire outfit in a couple clicks. And you can also shop for occasion, which is very nice, because sometimes I didn't even know that I was going to that occasion. And then I see the occasion as a tab and I'm like, maybe I am going to, you know, need a ball gown soon. And then here I am, purchasing a ball gown. Revolve literally has everything from elevated basics and matching sets when you're just stepping out to grab coffee with a friend, and then other statement pieces for big events.

• 33:00Speaker 00

  Listen, hot girl energy, hot mom energy, whatever era you're in, Revolve has the outfit for it. Revolve has the hottest brands, new arrivals dropping daily, and pieces you'll wear over and over again. Go to revolve.com/chd and use code CHD for 15% off your order. This is a paid ad by BetterHelp. So anytime that I am finding myself having a habit that I just cannot kick, I'm like, okay, I need to talk about this in therapy. Listen, guys, everyone has habits, mindsets, or patterns that don't serve them. But recognizing what they are and learning how to let them go can be so important. It's literally the first step towards creating meaningful change. And therapy with BetterHelp, one of the leading online therapy platforms,

• 33:42Speaker 00

  can be a space to explore where those patterns come from and develop healthier habits and mindsets for a more fulfilling life. With over 30,000 therapists worldwide, BetterHelp has served millions of people globally. BetterHelp makes it easier to fit therapy into your routine with flexible ways to connect that work for different schedules and lifestyles. Plus, BetterHelp therapists have at least three years and 1,000 hours on hand experience and hold all required education, training, and certifications. You can meet with a range of professionals from marriage and family therapists to social workers and counselors. So Daddy Gang, if you're thinking of starting therapy,

• 34:22Speaker 00

  give BetterHelp a try. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/daddy. That's better H E L P dot com slash daddy.

• 34:35Speaker 00

  You weren't the one that got a kidney stone recently.

• 34:38Speaker 02

  No, my husband got a kidney stone. And I'll tell you right now, I'll tell you right now, watching Jeff get a kidney stone, I've never been less attracted and been like, quit being a little bitch. You know what I mean? Either was like, I don't give a shit if you've got a stone, a stone the size of a fucking, you know, lacrosse ball shredding your insides. Like, woman the fuck up, Jeff. Now, I need to tell you about an experience that I had when people like, oh, well, kidney stones are, you know, horrifically painful. Of course they are. But I had an ovarian torsion. I had an ovary, an ovarian cyst.

• 35:15Speaker 00

  Let's get into it.

• 35:16Speaker 02

  Explode on an airplane. Have I ever told this story on here before? I don't know. We need to do like a fact check?

• 35:22Speaker 00

  No.

• 35:22Speaker 02

  Okay. So I had, and again, and again, this was me being like, I'm gonna tough it out. I'm good, I'm good. I get ovarian cysts quite a bit because I have PCOS, you know, in my short white coat. And amongst other things, it's scalded, it's PCOS, it's eczema, acid reflux, there's a lot of things happening. So I was on a flight going from New York to London. This was back in 2019. And I didn't feel well all day. I had three auditions. I was living in New York City at the time. And I wasn't feeling well, but I get ovarian cysts a lot. And I was like, I'll tough it out. I'm like, about to start my period. I'll tough it out, I'll tough it out. I had never had a torsion before, so I didn't know what was coming. My husband, again, told me, Jeff is like the wise sensei. He was like, Heather, do not get on this flight. But at that time, I was just starting to make money and I had a really good seat.

• 36:06Speaker 02

  And I knew if I changed the flight, I didn't have enough status, I'd be like in the back by the shitter. So I was like, you know what? I'm going with the good seat. You know what I mean?

• 36:13Speaker 00

  A little bit of pain.

• 36:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, I got a little bit of pain. And I thought to myself, I called my girlfriend to get kidney stones. I said, am I experiencing a kidney stone? She's like, yeah, probably. The only thing you can do for it is just drink a beer. You have to have like a diuretic. Drink a beer, take an Advil, you'll be good to go. I get on the plane, I buckle up, I pop like three Advil. We take off, we're about an hour into the flight, and all of a sudden, I sit up and I'm like, oh my God, I am dying. I am dying. Now, I think it's my appendix. I think that in this moment, my appendix is completely ruptured. I get up, I go to one of the flight attendants and I said, hi. And again, I'd never like to ask for anything. I'm such a fucking people pleaser. And I go, hi ma'am, I'm so sorry. As a, the daughter and granddaughter of a lot of people in aviation, I never want to cause an alarm. I didn't even want to ask for help.

• 36:58Speaker 02

  I said, but I'm pretty sure my insides are exploding. Could you possibly help me? And she looked at me, I'm completely ghostly white. She puts me on oxygen. I immediately projectile vomit all over the galley. I am mortified. And I'm on a, what was I, Virgin Atlantic flight. So everyone's proper and British. They get on the loudspeaker and they're like, hi, we need a medic, we have a medical emergency. Is there a doctor on board? This lovely woman comes up. She's a nurse and she's very British and she goes, she's doing an abdominal assessment on me. She's like, okay, I don't, I do not think it's appendicitis. And she's like, oh, thank you. Have an ectopic pregnancy. I didn't even know what that was. And I said, ma'am, I really don't think that's what's happening. And that's a really scary thing. You basically become like septic.

• 37:40Speaker 02

  I don't even text my husband. We're now like four hours over the Atlantic. They're not turning around. They're like, they called down, and I didn't know that they had this, but they called down, they find some sort of medicine that they can give me, kind of like knock me out. I'm laying down in my own vomit in the galley. They put a blanket over me. I'm like, I mean, I'm shivering at this point. I have no idea what's happening. Turns out what actually happened was I had ovarian cyst, it exploded, and it flipped my ovary at the same time. It's called a torsion. So most painful thing I've ever experienced. We land at Heathrow, okay? You were, I'm surprised I'm still breathing. We land at Heathrow, I am mortified, okay? They put me on a gurney. They, they, I'm, they're like, ladies and gentlemen, we have a medical emergency.

• 38:24Speaker 02

  Gonna have to wait for this fat cunt to be wheeled out. Wheeled out on the tarmac. And mind you, because you know I dress really nice on flights. I have on a cool black jacket. I've got a giant fedora.

• 38:36Speaker 00

  No, you don't.

• 38:37Speaker 02

  Bitch, I got taken off in a fedora. I look like Carmen Sandiego, ready to explore London. And it's some fun fact, though, if you ever have to go to the hospital in the UK, as soon as you get on the ambulance, the guy's like, you want a little nitrous oxide? I'm like, you mean laughing gas? He's like, yeah, you look like shit. He hands me a tube. I'm just huffing, okay? I'm literally doing whippets on the way to the emergency room. We get there, we get there, okay? And I'm at the, I'm at the hospital by Heathrow. And shout out to that healthcare system. Everybody was so wonderful. But at one point, I shit you not, I'm not saying this to do the bit, I really genuinely mean this. The woman's like, oh shit, I don't have my light. She's like, do you mind if I borrow your cellphone?

• 39:22Speaker 00

  No.

• 39:22Speaker 02

  She is, I have my legs spread. I'm in stirrups. She's literally clawing me open and using my cellphone light. She's like, oh, you got a text from Jeff? Who answered that? This is crazy. And I'm like, please don't record this. I thought we were live streaming this on Instagram. Now, mind you, I did not tell Jeff what was going on the entire time.

• 39:40Speaker 00

  Why? Because you're just, now you're like, I don't want to freak him out?

• 39:42Speaker 02

  I didn't want to freak him out. Because what was he gonna do? And I'm such a ballbuster, like, I got this, I can handle this on my own. I will never do that again. I didn't text him till after I was at the hospital and we had realized what happened and they were gonna like, you know, I was okay. That's when I text him, I go, so I just want you to know, I'm in the hospital.

• 40:00Speaker 02

  He, he was furious at me for like two weeks. He's like, never do that again. But also, when you're, you know, I was kind of shivering in the guy, I couldn't figure out how to connect to wifi. It also wasn't really my fault.

• 40:10Speaker 00

  Heather, I'm picturing myself in like, whatever row I'm in, looking out the airplane window, seeing a woman on a gurney with a big fedora hat.

• 40:24Speaker 02

  Dress like she's going to the Kentucky Derby.

• 40:27Speaker 00

  Big blazer and you're literally waving to everyone.

• 40:32Speaker 02

  Now, here's the real kicker. I get out of the hospital. Now, once after you have a torsion or an ovarian, an ovary explode, there's kind of nothing they can do. They do a vaginal exam. They do an ultrasound to make sure that you're, they can save your ovary because you can literally lose an ovary. It's like the blood supply gets cut off. It's very scary. Thank God, everything, and I guess like twisted back. And they're like, honestly, there's nothing we can do. You're good. You're back to normal. Like, you know, when a cis birth, there's a lot of fluid. And, but they're like, we're gonna give you an oxycodone and like, meet you at the pub. So I leave and then I had to go back to Heathrow to then get my luggage and go through customs. So I got my, I'm like on a painkiller. I had to then

• 41:16Speaker 02

  go back through customs at Heathrow. Uh huh. It was very traumatic.

• 41:19Speaker 00

  Mm hmm.

• 41:21Speaker 02

  But shout out to everybody at the hospital near Heathrow and shout out to the guy who gave me some nitrous oxide.

• 41:26Speaker 00

  Love you.

• 41:27Speaker 02

  That was amazing.

• 41:28Speaker 00

  Now, what I'm, what I'm gathering from this is what the point of this story was to say, that's why you have no fucking care in the world for Jeff and his kidney stone.

• 41:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. And when Jeff got a kidney, and I, and I clocked it. I said, I know you have a kidney stone. He's like, no, you know, I just want to get checked out. That's the other thing too, what pisses me off because I have a low key online medical degree. It really pisses me off when people don't trust my diagnosis. I feel very strongly about that.

• 41:55Speaker 00

  So you diagnosed him?

• 41:56Speaker 02

  It was, yeah, it was Thanksgiving Day. This is four days after my surgery. So I'm still, I've got drains. I shouldn't be out in public. I'm swollen. And I'm like, honey, you have, you have a kidney stone. Chug a beer. I said, go get a beer, chug a beer. There's nothing they're gonna be able to do. It's also Thanksgiving and you don't want the holiday crew.

• 42:12Speaker 00

  And typical men making about themselves. You're recovering. You're supposed to be.

• 42:15Speaker 02

  You got a turkey to start baking. Let's get to it. Mama wants some macaroni and cheese. I can only choose soft foods because I just got a bunch of lipo around my neck.

• 42:22Speaker 00

  All right. This isn't about you, Jeff.

• 42:24Speaker 02

  Yeah. So, and he's writhing in pain and we get there. And of course, the whole medical staff at the hospital wants to come treat me because my head's swollen and I've got dried blood everywhere. And I've literally have drains and they're thinking like, oh, the drain must've come loose or something happened. And I'm like, guys, what's good? How we doing? Happy Thanksgiving. I literally think I said, who got the potluck? And then my husband ended up having a kidney stone. Yeah. And then I had to watch him pass a kidney stone. And again, I think, and I've never given births, but obviously it's, good luck. It's a, it's a intense experience.

• 42:57Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 42:58Speaker 02

  Uh, but I really had to nurse him for the next couple of days. And that time was supposed to be about me and my recovery.

• 43:03Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 43:03Speaker 02

  And that's what I got pissed about.

• 43:06Speaker 00

  Heather.

• 43:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:08Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 43:08Speaker 02

  I'm sorry. I drink so many liquids when I'm.

• 43:09Speaker 00

  No, this is good. This is good. Okay. So we're, um, we're going into fall.

• 43:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:13Speaker 00

  Halloween is coming up.

• 43:14Speaker 02

  Ooh, yes.

• 43:15Speaker 00

  And I'm wondering, back in college, do you have any good costume ideas? What did you do?

• 43:20Speaker 02

  We used to rent costumes at Ole Miss from this guy. It was kind of like a barn, like this big warehouse. And all the costumes were riddled with asbestos, but we would rent them for like $200. I mean, this guy was running a monopoly on the costume game. Because when we were in college, you couldn't just order it on Amazon. There was no overnighting, some sort of like garter to look like a German beermaid. That was not it. I had to go drive to a farm, pay this man $200 cash and be like, what do you got in a size 12? Let me know. You got anything? Okay, cool. Um, you know, I know, I always dressed up funny, but that's always been who I, who I've been.

• 43:53Speaker 00

  Are you ever gonna do a couples costume with Jeff? Are we not into couples costumes?

• 44:00Speaker 02

  Let me think about that.

• 44:01Speaker 00

  Would you do one?

• 44:02Speaker 02

  I would do one.

• 44:03Speaker 00

  What would you do?

• 44:04Speaker 02

  But I would love to have him go full bald with me and we both do Pitbull. Because you know, that's my, my, the truly who I am at the core of who I am is a woman in drag as Pitbull.

• 44:14Speaker 00

  Hold on, wait. Didn't you, what did you just do recently with Pitbull? You, you got invited to the what?

• 44:19Speaker 02

  So I got invited to his concert in Hyde Park and we broke the Guinness Book of World Records for the most amount of people in bald caps. Now, I just want to state for the record, a lot of the younger galleys don't realize, but I did start that trend. So I've been dressing as Pitbull for like over 10 years. That's been my, that's been my thing. Okay?

• 44:34Speaker 00

  That's been your dream.

• 44:35Speaker 02

  That's been my dream. And I did it because I just thought it was so hysterical. And I love to do like special effects makeup. So I dressed, started dressing as Pitbull. It kind of like took off and I used to do impressions as him. My first tour, I would open, I'd have a big video that would open as Pitbull. So everybody knows that I've had this obsession with Mr. Worldwide, Mr. 305, also known as Armando. That's his real name.

• 44:55Speaker 00

  Have you met Armando?

• 44:56Speaker 02

  I met Armando. When I tell you, I look more like Armando when I'm in drag than he looks like himself.

• 45:03Speaker 00

  Wait, wait, wait.

• 45:04Speaker 02

  I met, yes.

• 45:05Speaker 00

  When did you meet him?

• 45:06Speaker 02

  I met him this summer in Hyde Park. Uh huh.

• 45:09Speaker 00

  Did you get a meet and greet?

• 45:10Speaker 02

  Oh, I got a meet and greet. Oh yeah. I've got his number. We're boys. And when I, I just need you to know, he texts like Pitbull. He texts me, he reached out to me and was like, Heather, I love your work. Ha ha. You're so amazing. Let's go to London. And it was 55 exclamation points. And I read it like him. I'm like, London. He's like, I will see you there. Dolly. And I, I just said, this is amazing.

• 45:31Speaker 00

  So did he know that you were like a huge stan?

• 45:34Speaker 02

  Yeah. And he's, he's watched my stuff over the years and everybody's shared it with him. And he's the nicest guy. I want you to know, a dream of mine is to do some sort of collab with him. He is such a good guy and he has such a great reputation in the business. So that was also wonderful. Like Never Meet Your Heroes. And I met him and I said, want to kiss him? I want him to be my new father and maybe like my third husband.

• 45:54Speaker 00

  What's your favorite Pitbull song?

• 45:56Speaker 02

  Hmm. That's a good question. I mean, Fireball always tickles me in a, in a way that I didn't know it could tickle me.

• 46:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 46:03Speaker 02

  But my real true OG song is Culo. Culo is like the beginning.

• 46:09Speaker 00

  How does Culo go again?

• 46:12Speaker 02

  Culo. Yeah. And also being from Atlanta, he and Little John tour a lot and they've been producing music together for a really long time. And I'm the biggest Little John fan. So it's kind of this like kismet thing that I'm from Atlanta and Pitbull and we all work together.

• 46:26Speaker 00

  I wonder if you could like get in one of his music videos?

• 46:28Speaker 02

  I would love to. Armando, if you hear this, I would love to be in the video.

• 46:32Speaker 00

  Even if he needs an extra where like he, you know how that people have their double for the day? Where he doesn't want to do the stand in scenes of him in the corner or whatever, and it's far away? You could be his double.

• 46:42Speaker 02

  Now, this was the craziest thing. I'm walking through Hyde Park. And so I basically host, I was hosting for, on YouTube, a live countdown of him getting the, the gift for the Guinness Book of World Records. And Guinness Book of World Records like included me. They sent me a plaque. So I, I am, I'm counted within that number. I'm walking through the crowd. I have, and Kesha is performing at this time. So he's not on stage yet. Everyone started mobbing me and following me because I have a camera crew following me and they're like, Pitbull, Pitbull. I mean, my hair and makeup was so good. Shout out to the makeup artist. And I had to like stop people. I'm like, I have acrylic nails. I have on a, like, I'm not, I'm a woman. I'm a woman. I just kept saying, I am a woman. And people could not believe it. And they would get up close and they're like, oh my God, it's not you. It's not you.

• 47:25Speaker 00

  It's literally like, well, what is it? Like the, when it started with like the Timothy Chalamet lookalike contest in New York City. Like you were so accurate. You were so committed to the bit. I'm telling you, this is your next thing. You're going to be in one of his music videos and you're gonna be his stunt double.

• 47:39Speaker 02

  And, and I've had Bing on a music video on my vision board for a really long time. It's just a dream.

• 47:51Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Airbnb. As you guys know, I have basically been working double time throughout this pregnancy to bank episodes for the month that I will be on maternity leave. And a few weeks ago, it all just kind of hit me. I was like, wait, wait, wait, where did summer go? And I was talking about this with Matt and he ended up surprising me with a little staycation. He booked this beautiful home on Airbnb in Malibu so that we could pretend like it was summer while it's still warm here in LA. The weather was perfect. The house was right on the beach, which was so relaxing and amazing. It also had just such a gorgeous kitchen. We stayed in, we cooked dinner together. And

• 48:33Speaker 00

  you know, daddy gaining my cooking skills, they have, they have gotten better. They've gotten a little bit better through pregnancy. But it was really just so nice to unplug and spend that time together before the baby comes and we move into this completely new chapter of our life. So whether you're planning a cozy weekend away, or you're just looking for an excuse to unplug for a few days, October is the perfect time to get out of town. Booking a home on Airbnb makes the trip feel even more special because everyone has room to actually spend time together. Whether you're coming back after a long day out, or you're also just cooking dinner. Airbnb makes settling in even easier because you can order groceries for your trip and have all the snacks and essentials delivered after you arrive. My

• 49:18Speaker 00

  favorite fall trips always have one thing in common, an amazing place to stay. That's why I always look at Airbnb first. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by SoFi, the everything app for smarter money. If your money is scattered across five different apps you never open, you're not in control. Your money should move you forward. With SoFi, you get award winning banking, investing, borrowing, and more all in one app. So you finally know where your money is. Make your first move with SoFi Checking and Savings. Competitive APY, no account fees, a bonus when you join with eligible direct deposit. Terms apply. SoFi Bank, NA member FDIC. When you're ready to invest or pay off that debt, everything you need is right there. As a

• 50:02Speaker 00

  SoFi member, you get access to SoFi Wealth's world-class financial planners to help you know what to do next. Get started today at sofi.com/callherdaddy. SoFi, get your money right. This is a paid advertisement by SoFi Technologies and is not intended to be financial advice.

• 50:20Speaker 00

  Okay, um, you moved out.

• 50:22Speaker 02

  I moved out of Robbins. People are mad at me.

• 50:24Speaker 00

  So to anyone who's not, you know, I don't know, lives under a rock. For a while Heather and her husband lived with Heather's mother.

• 50:31Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 50:32Speaker 00

  Now, there was positives, there was negatives. We talked about this a lot. Every time you've come on, I'm like, how is it living with your mom? Like, what's going on? Who made the decision to leave?

• 50:42Speaker 02

  I did. But it wasn't, people really want to be like, something dramatic happened.

• 50:47Speaker 00

  There's a riff.

• 50:48Speaker 02

  I said, I just want to be able to have sex in my kitchen. Can I tell you, I tour every weekend. I work too hard to not be able to come home on a Sunday. Go to my room, take a two hour nap. I would get woken up. My mom's like, what are you doing? You being lazy on a Sunday? Oh, okay. I'm like, I just did 16 shows this weekend. She goes, I'm just saying, are you taking me to dinner? What are we doing? Oh, you want to take a nap? I'm just saying it's three o'clock in the afternoon. It's three o'clock. You know, the sun's out. I'm like, my bones hurt. I am, I have no voice. I have met a thousand people this weekend. Can I just take a nap? And finally, I just said, I work too hard and I make too much money to not have my space.

• 51:24Speaker 00

  Didn't you live with her for six years?

• 51:26Speaker 02

  Yes, six years.

• 51:26Speaker 00

  So what, what was at the six year mark where you're like, I now want to have sex in my kitchen? Like, it just, it just ruptured and you were like, I just need it?

• 51:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, and I, I just said, I, I don't know. At some point, I looked at Jeff, I go, what are we doing?

• 51:40Speaker 00

  You know, and Jeff's been like, I've been waiting for you to ask that. He's like, I wasn't gonna push it, but like, I agree.

• 51:47Speaker 02

  You're just like, you know, I wasn't gonna say anything because I know you have a great relationship with your mother, but I am, I act, I've actively put down, down payments. We are in escrow on four properties. You just have to show up and let me know which one you like. Yeah, but, and I walked into my house that I bought now and I just looked around. I said, great, we'll take it. Didn't look at the basement, didn't look at the other things. I walked in, I said, love it, let's go.

• 52:06Speaker 00

  Have you had a good time?

• 52:08Speaker 02

  We've had a good time, but I did have a fan trying to decapitate me, an actual outdoor fan, a ceiling fan. No, I have, listen, the day that I have a stalker that shows up in my bushes, I'll be like, come in, sit on mom's lap. Let's chit chat. Do you need some plasma? You know, do you need, do you need an egg?

• 52:24Speaker 00

  Okay, so you almost got decapitated. How?

• 52:25Speaker 02

  I, I was standing outside having my coffee and the fan, the outdoor fan, it like popped down. I just heard clunk, it detached and it was still rotating, flew off, nearly decapitated me. They were like Final Destination shit.

• 52:39Speaker 00

  And you're like, mom, listen to what happened to me today. She's like, yes, you deserve it.

• 52:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, she's like, I came loose on the screws. No, I mean, I see my mom, we talk 25 times a day. She's in her space and I just said, listen, if we want to start a family, I need to be having a little bit more sex than I was having.

• 52:52Speaker 00

  But everyone, everyone likes a little riff, you know, we like a little tension with you and your mother. So, okay, so do you guys have the same, um, now that you're decorating, obviously, do you guys have the same decorating style? How are you and Jeff doing with decorating? Like, what's happening?

• 53:04Speaker 02

  No, I did all this stuff to the house, uh, at my mom's house and then I came over three days later and she had repainted everything. And I said, good thing I cut that check. That's another reason I said, I just need to have my own space. But my house is covered in my mom's art. My mom's an incredible, uh, contemporary painter. And so my whole house is like a shrine to Robbins.

• 53:25Speaker 00

  Is Jeff getting a man cave?

• 53:27Speaker 02

  He is getting a man cave. He's getting a golf simulator. Um, I was laying in my pool, having this moment like, look at what I've done. I've worked my, really worked my ass off for 10 years. And I was like, this is why I do casino shows.

• 53:40Speaker 02

  And then I did this private gig the other night for this, they ended up being the coolest people ever. But I got a phone call from my agent and they were like, hey, this, this group of like 25 people want you to come perform for them. And I was like, okay, I couldn't get any information about them online. They're very private. And I got a little worried. So I just said, you know, have we vetted them? And Jeff saw the amount of money and he goes, I need a golf simulator. She'll be fine.

• 54:05Speaker 00

  He's like, I will drop your ass off. Let me know when it's over.

• 54:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, and they were great. And of course, my team had vetted them and they were awesome. And now everybody has my personal phone number. But that kind of shit where like,

• 54:15Speaker 00

  You're doing private party?

• 54:19Speaker 02

  I want everybody listening to know, if you have some cash in the bank, let me come roast you, your family, I'll come to Christmas. I, I love to work and I will say there's a lot, and also decorating curtains are very expensive.

• 54:32Speaker 00

  Oh my God, and there's a lot of money, I'm sure. That like, and you've heard about that when like Rihanna, Justin Bieber goes overseas and they pay them this big check

• 54:41Speaker 02

  I get it.

• 54:42Speaker 00

  to do a little quick wedding and then they fly back and it's like, that's you.

• 54:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, if like the Prince of Spain wants me to come and do a little striptease, I am your girl.

• 54:50Speaker 00

  He's like, I actually literally just want you to be funny and you're like, oh.

• 54:54Speaker 02

  Oh, so you want me to put my top back on? Okay, okay.

• 54:57Speaker 00

  Um, speaking of decorating, let's talk about Home Goods.

• 55:00Speaker 02

  My favorite place on the planet.

• 55:00Speaker 00

  Just a quick little Home Goods hit. You know, my mother moved to LA and we are just Home Goods-ing it up at all times.

• 55:07Speaker 02

  How are the Home Goods here? You go to the one in the valley?

• 55:10Speaker 00

  I go to the one in the valley.

• 55:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:12Speaker 00

  Now, my favorite pastime was going with my mom and her best friend. We would all go as a family and we'd go in and they have this whole thing. To the point where my mom and her best friend literally know, oh, the aisle got one new thing this week. Like my mom's best friend, shout out Mary, she is in Home Goods every week. Talk to me about your affiliation, your love for Home Goods. And if someone hasn't been there somehow, some way, what to expect when you get into Home Goods?

• 55:36Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, if you've never been to a Home Goods, I think is, if you were to like drop, get dropped off at Ellis Island and you're a woman from like another country and you wanted to experience like true American beauty and joy and like, welcome to our country. I would immediately want to take you to a Home Goods and be like, look at this stuff. Isn't it neat? Wouldn't you think my collection's complete? That's what I would do. I mean, it's a, it's a, it's a safe space for women to walk around, to tinker, to touch tchotchkes. You know, you go in there with your iced coffee or your glass of wine in a Yeti cooler and you just sip and you browse and you buy shit and bowls. It's a lot of bowls. I see we have a Home Goods bowl right here.

• 56:14Speaker 00

  Uh huh.

• 56:14Speaker 02

  A lot of mixed metals, maybe a little marble. You get a piece of art. You buy some nice sheets that are discounted. It's a joyful place. Now you will also find interesting pieces. A lot of funky outdoor furniture, like it'll be a statue of a frog on a lily pad. But the lily pad is actually the tabletop and that's where you put your cocktails by, by the pool.

• 56:33Speaker 00

  And the best is when it's on sale and you're like, why? Cause it's a little chipped or there's, the leg is broken.

• 56:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:40Speaker 00

  But you find the magic where you're like, but it's on sale. And maybe if I just turn the left leg and that's facing the wall that no one's gonna see. You find your pieces and you make it your own so quickly.

• 56:51Speaker 02

  I think there is something in the feminine DNA where we like the hunt. You know, the lioness in me that actually goes out and brings home the bacon, stalks the prey, brings it back.

• 57:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 57:04Speaker 02

  Digging through bins of throw pillows, dragging, using my bare primal maternal hands to pull those rugs back at Home Goods. I'm like, that's the one. It's a Ralph Lauren rug. It's, you know, 50% off. I'm getting wet just thinking about it.

• 57:19Speaker 00

  And Heather, you know what's great?

• 57:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:21Speaker 00

  When you're walking those aisles and you pass that same woman a couple of times, it's like a nod. You're in solidarity with these people where you're like, you get anything good yet?

• 57:31Speaker 02

  Oh, I comment on the cart. I rifle through it. I go, I'm just saying, I need to know where those candlesticks are.

• 57:35Speaker 00

  Unless you start to eye the same thing as the same woman and there's one left.

• 57:40Speaker 02

  And then you fight her outside of the Home Goods. You wrestle her to the ground and you steal her belongings.

• 57:46Speaker 00

  I am, I needed to say this because I'm getting so hyped up. I have to go find two bedside table lamps this weekend.

• 57:52Speaker 02

  Great. They got great stuff.

• 57:53Speaker 00

  I'm bringing my mom and I'm,

• 57:55Speaker 02

  I'm around this weekend. If you want to, if you want to putts, I'm, I'm happy to do it.

• 57:58Speaker 00

  Get in person, get out there.

• 58:00Speaker 02

  And I also want to give a shout out to the Home Goods snack section. People do not give the food purveyors that are selling their goods, their dried pastas, the Italian candies. They have pistachio candies. It's a nice chocolate, shove the pistachio cream. Holy, it makes a great decor in a marble bowl, but they're also delicious. So,

• 58:19Speaker 00

  I have literally never tried the food.

• 58:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, you need to try the food. It's all great.

• 58:22Speaker 00

  Uh huh. All right, I'm going quick. Are you ready?

• 58:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm ready.

• 58:25Speaker 00

  We're about to wind down and I'm going to get your quick thoughts on a couple of things because you're, you know, millennial trends. And I want to know what your thought is on all of this.

• 58:33Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 58:34Speaker 00

  Ready? Wedge flip flops.

• 58:36Speaker 02

  Uh, love them, need them, want more of them.

• 58:39Speaker 00

  Okay, Birkenstocks?

• 58:40Speaker 02

  Love them. They're a great orthotic. My, my dogs are barking. I need a good, solid shoe.

• 58:44Speaker 00

  Perfect. Skinny cigarettes.

• 58:47Speaker 02

  The greatest invention ever.

• 58:50Speaker 00

  And are we only doing it in Europe?

• 58:52Speaker 02

  We should, but I've been known to sit outside of LAX at a rental car and just kind of be alone with my thoughts. I, I have.

• 58:59Speaker 00

  Perfect. Bottomless mimosa brunch.

• 59:03Speaker 02

  Not for me, because too much orange juice is going to flare up the acid reflux. And again, I have to look at my acid intake with the gout.

• 59:10Speaker 00

  And are you even a brunch girl?

• 59:12Speaker 02

  No, brunch just makes me sleepy. I'm more of a dinner gal. You give me one dirty martini, a bone and ribeye, and then that's, that's where I thrive. I'm more of a nighttime kitty cat.

• 59:21Speaker 00

  Okay, toe rings.

• 59:24Speaker 02

  Ooh, you know, as somebody who's been told I have specifically gorgeous toe cleavage, I might want a ring for them toes.

• 59:31Speaker 00

  Okay, monogramming things.

• 59:33Speaker 02

  Oh, honey, I'm from the South. I think you should have your initials on everything.

• 59:36Speaker 00

  You're monogramming shit?

• 59:37Speaker 02

  Yes, I'm monogramming everything and I have monogrammed, uh, giant euro shams on my bed and they have my initials and not my husband's and people are very confused, but if you're from the South, you know, you always put the woman's initials. You don't put the family.

• 59:51Speaker 00

  On the fucking bed?

• 59:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:53Speaker 00

  That's a thing?

• 59:53Speaker 02

  Uh huh. Because I didn't take my husband's name, but our kids will have his name.

• 59:56Speaker 00

  Does Jeff have a problem with it or no?

• 59:59Speaker 02

  No, also like it's, it's confusing for business.

• 1:00:02Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:03Speaker 02

  He didn't get it. Also, I'll just say my dad's dead and he only had girls, so we're keeping the McMahon as long as we can.

• 1:00:08Speaker 00

  And that's the such the good answer. My dad's dead.

• 1:00:10Speaker 02

  My dad said, hey Jeff, I don't know if you know this, but my dad died.

• 1:00:12Speaker 00

  And he's like, never mind.

• 1:00:13Speaker 02

  My name.

• 1:00:13Speaker 00

  Never mind.

• 1:00:14Speaker 02

  No, Jeff, Jeff's not threatened by it. He loves it.

• 1:00:16Speaker 00

  The going out top.

• 1:00:17Speaker 02

  We need more of them.

• 1:00:18Speaker 00

  Mm hmm.

• 1:00:19Speaker 02

  This is something as, as, as I'm running for Congress, I need you to know that I am bringing back not only going out tops, tops in general. Where do you get tops?

• 1:00:27Speaker 00

  I don't, I don't.

• 1:00:28Speaker 02

  Everybody wears these fucking body suits.

• 1:00:30Speaker 00

  So true.

• 1:00:30Speaker 02

  I am so sick and tired. That's probably why I got gout, because it is so tight on my pussy that I'm not getting actual blood flow down to the foot. Therefore the uric acid is backing up all the way to my throat. I think if we stop doing the rompers and we stop doing the body suits and we brought back tops, we would all be a lot happier.

• 1:00:47Speaker 00

  Juicy couture sweat tracksuit.

• 1:00:49Speaker 02

  Love them, need them, want more.

• 1:00:51Speaker 00

  Last one, having 15 bridesmaids at your wedding.

• 1:00:55Speaker 02

  Um, that's insane. Okay. Absolutely not to that. I think have them be a part of the party, have a good time, but you don't need 15 bridesmaids.

• 1:01:04Speaker 00

  Have you ever been a bridesmaid?

• 1:01:05Speaker 02

  I've been a bridesmaid a hundred times.

• 1:01:06Speaker 00

  And how do they go? Have you had really bad like bridezilla experiences?

• 1:01:10Speaker 02

  No, I've always had great experiences. Now, half of the weddings I was in, they're no longer together. And I did have one friend, the night before the wedding, we all got together and we said, hey, hey, cake cupcake, bad idea.

• 1:01:21Speaker 00

  No.

• 1:01:21Speaker 02

  We all confessed that we couldn't stand the guy and it was like one of those like come to Jesus meetings.

• 1:01:26Speaker 00

  Wait, Heather?

• 1:01:27Speaker 02

  I know. And, and she knew it, but she still went ahead and, and got married and then is obviously no longer with him. And we love and adore her and she's one of our dear friend, but yeah.

• 1:01:36Speaker 00

  Did you think that she was going to blow up the wedding?

• 1:01:38Speaker 02

  I did. And, um, you know, listen, it's, that wasn't my journey, but I, I did have to say, I said, I gotta be honest with you. This is not good.

• 1:01:47Speaker 00

  Okay. That is where like I have talked about this. I'm so scared to ever talk about, you know, bachelorette.

• 1:01:54Speaker 02

  Like there's backlash to you?

• 1:01:55Speaker 00

  Yeah. Like if I ever try to like talk about like, cause sometimes people are like, oh my God, well you have to pay for the bachelorette and there's thousands of dollars and people get really upset and there's like guidelines, I think that women have when it comes to bachelorette and being a ba- a bridesmaid. And it's, people are very intense. So I wasn't sure if you had anything where people were like getting crazy over the bachelorette.

• 1:02:13Speaker 02

  And I got married abroad, therefore I didn't have a bachelorette party. I said, if I'm asking you to go across the ocean, I'm definitely not asking you to be a bachelorette. And my friends are sweet enough that they, they threw like a surprise pool party for me and it was so kind and generous and they didn't need to do that. But I would never, I'm not asking you to go to Key West, strap on an airbrushed T-shirt, do a bunch of mushrooms and go jet skiing. While that does sound like a fun Tuesday, I'm not begging you to do that.

• 1:02:36Speaker 00

  Okay. And I do think that's such self-awareness there. And again, people can do what they want, but I think if you have a destination wedding, you gotta be real sure of how much you're asking for on your bachelorette, even if you're asking for something. Going out of the country twice is not an option.

• 1:02:49Speaker 02

  It's not an option. And listen, back in the day, one of my best friends, she got married in Puerto Rico and I couldn't make her bachelorette party beforehand because I said, hey, I'm broke as a joke. I can either come to Puerto Rico, but I can't come to the bachelorette. And she was like, I totally get it. And she was very kind about it. And I'm like, I, I don't have two pennies rubbed together. I cannot do this.

• 1:03:06Speaker 00

  I love that so much because the amount of people that are like, well, they have to figure it out. No.

• 1:03:10Speaker 02

  Can I just say something real quick?

• 1:03:11Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 1:03:11Speaker 02

  We're going to learn another lesson and running for Congress, one thing I want to teach is, uh, financial literacy to specifically women. And I know you have like professionals on here.

• 1:03:20Speaker 00

  No, this is good.

• 1:03:21Speaker 02

  But this is why I go to Home Goods. This is why I go to Marshalls. We are all living outside our means and I feel that more than ever. I mean, I saved up for four, seven years to get a house and I even feel guilty going and buying things or like, you know, doing things for myself. But I just feel like we all need to pump the brakes. You know, the economy's not doing great right now and we all need to just pump the fucking brakes.

• 1:03:40Speaker 00

  I know. And expecting your friends to be able to do like this over here and this over here for the bachelorette and then the wedding, everybody calm down. Cause I know we're getting into that season and it always happens and it's like, just everyone be gracious when your friend tells you that they can't afford it. You need to just also like not blame them and you need to be able to just be like, you know what? Okay.

• 1:03:58Speaker 02

  I was also not bridezilla and maybe somebody, one of my friends will be like, you know, fact check me on that. Uh, because I'm an entertainer. True. Hear me out. When I got to Italy, I was so excited for people to have fun. I didn't even give, I didn't even try on my, I did like one try on for my wedding dress. I knew I was going to look great in it regardless. And I was just like, are you guys having fun? Are you having so much fun? What are we doing? What are we drinking? You have an apple spits? Do you need a refill? Like people had to say, sit down, calm down, enjoy yourself. I'm like, I'm having the best time. Are you having fun?

• 1:04:25Speaker 00

  And that's, but you know what? I love this because I think a lot of people also just need to recalibrate, enjoy your wedding and stop focusing on all the other people. If people can't come, they can't come. Leave it be. Um, okay.

• 1:04:35Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:04:36Speaker 00

  Your special coming out.

• 1:04:37Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:04:38Speaker 00

  Buy a thread on Hulu. I want to know, where do you write your best stuff? Because at this point, third special, you're so funny, you're so outgoing, but like, are you writing things out on a notepad? Are you putting it in your notes app? Like where, where are you? How are you doing this?

• 1:04:56Speaker 02

  I write so much on stage. I, and the way I write is I always have a beginning and an end. I kind of have a bookend. Because I, and I've said this a million times, but because I'm a theater kid, I see the whole story, the whole picture. And then I go backwards. So I have a weird way I write. I basically lock myself in the basement, three weeks before I'm about to go out on the road. And I come up with like a beautiful mind. I mean, there's whiteboards, there's sticky notes and Jeff comes down. I haven't slept three days. I'm chain smoking cigarettes in the basement. I'm like, give me rigatoni for a kiss on the lips and then get out of here. And he's like, okay, all right, relax. Um, and then I write on the road, but you know, it's been different and I'm so proud of this special. I don't have any yes men around me. Like I'm so grateful for the people that come on the road with me.

• 1:05:37Speaker 02

  My shout outs like Andrew and Ray and Tina, but, and, and just in the sense of like, I really started to get more critical with myself. And I wanted, I, when I get off stage, I'm like, give me feedback. Tell me, you know, cause I obviously can read a room and, and enjoy doing my comedy, but I really wanted people to like sit back and be like, I was sitting on the 10th row and this person really reacted to this. Like I, I'm, I'm getting very, I don't even want to say nitpicky, but very critical of certain things in a good way. And listen, you learn as you go. But I'm really, I'm really proud of this hour and I, you know, it was a very, I don't, I'm not even going to say vulnerable because my first special was about my dad passing and that was pretty vulnerable. But no, this is just like, I, I feel more confident than I've ever felt. I'm in the fucking zone.

• 1:06:18Speaker 02

  I'm not taking no for an answer. I don't give a fuck if you like me. I don't give a fuck if you watch the special. But if you do watch the special, you're going to sit down and have a great time.

• 1:06:26Speaker 00

  No, that's honestly Heather, I was.

• 1:06:28Speaker 02

  I'm so sorry, my publicist and my, everybody's going to be like, you, yeah, you don't need to say that.

• 1:06:31Speaker 00

  Yeah. They're like, no, no. Um, Alex, I'll, I'll help you. Please watch the special. Um, definitely watch the special. You are so naturally funny and it's so authentic to who you are. And I think that's so genuinely refreshing in today's day and age. Because people will see, oh, maybe I could try this or I could try this. This is just who Heather McMahon is. She's fucking hilarious. I'm telling you guys, when the cameras are off, she's just as funny. She's just as incredible. And I have loved getting to work with you in moments, like when we've done things on stage together.

• 1:07:02Speaker 02

  We always have a good time.

• 1:07:03Speaker 00

  It, like, let me put it this way. There was a moment in my career, which I don't want to give too pinpoint to where we had to get on stage at some moment where Heather didn't think she was going to have to come on stage. And I was literally calling her name to get on stage because I knew she was going to come out and she was going to save this.

• 1:07:20Speaker 02

  It was a little writer cup ish.

• 1:07:21Speaker 00

  Yeah. You know, literally, it was like something had happened and a guest was falling through and then something happened and someone wasn't feeling well and the, the whole thing. And then I just literally started going Heather, Heather. And around the stadium, Heather comes out.

• 1:07:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:07:31Speaker 00

  And you saved the show. You are such a professional. You know exactly how to get a crowd going. Like everything about you, I just have so much respect for and I'm so.

• 1:07:39Speaker 02

  So kind right back at you.

• 1:07:40Speaker 00

  It's really is so genuine though. And I am so excited for everyone to watch this special. I think the way that you storytell, the way that you do bring things together, your genuine, um, interaction with fandom is so fun to watch. You're so good off the cuff. You emceed Unwell Vegas and I remember you like just roasting all these different people. I'm like, how does she fucking think of this shit?

• 1:08:02Speaker 02

  So it's just like. It also turned out I had the flu that day.

• 1:08:05Speaker 00

  Literally?

• 1:08:06Speaker 02

  I had no idea. And then I, I was like, the next day I was like, I didn't even drink. I was like, I am very unwell.

• 1:08:10Speaker 00

  No.

• 1:08:10Speaker 02

  I was like, I am, I, I went down at the club, well, we went to the nightclub afterwards and I would never show up and like put anybody in like a position. But again, because I have a short white coat.

• 1:08:18Speaker 00

  You didn't even know.

• 1:08:19Speaker 02

  I was like, I think I'm just jet lagged. And by the end, the chain smokers were going and you were dancing and I could see your little choo choo as you were dancing above me getting footage and I went down so hard and literally Christina was like checking my pulse. She was, are you good? I go, I'm not feeling so great.

• 1:08:33Speaker 00

  She's got the flu, but that's literally such a testament to you be literally having the flu and you can still perform. I love you so much. I can't thank you enough for coming on and making me die laughing. I'm never going to think of, I'm going to want to run into you in an airport now. I need to see the blazer. I need to see the fedora. I need to see you in action. But until then, buy a thread, Hulu, everyone go watch it. Get ready to laugh. Everyone needs a little laughter in their life right now.

• 1:08:58Speaker 02

  They need some laughter and levity. And one last thing, because we're, we're learning a lesson today. If you're ever about to get on an airplane and you don't feel good, trust your instinct and don't do it. And if you ever feel like you don't know what you're doing, or you don't know what your job description is, ask.

• 1:09:12Speaker 00

  And last statement, any last words to the golf community?

• 1:09:15Speaker 02

  Uh, well, it pivoted to tennis.

• 1:09:20Speaker 02

  No, to the golfers out there. I love you.

• 1:09:22Speaker 00

  Love you.

• 1:09:22Speaker 02

  Love you. Bye.

• 1:09:38Speaker 00

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own and creating looks and spaces just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home, drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches. Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life. Ross makes fashion accessible to all with up to 20 to 60% off other retailers' prices on the brands you love. Find your nearest Ross at rossstores.com. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Haagen Dazs. Okay. It is so important to take some me time. You know what I mean, guys?

• 1:10:19Speaker 00

  So take your sweet time and enjoy rich, smooth, creamy ice cream from Haagen Dazs. Because honestly, when was the last time you actually slowed down and let yourself have a moment for you? You have to try their new cherry dark chocolate bar. Guys, picture rich cherry ice cream with tart cherry ribbons coated in thick dark chocolate. Are you kidding me? I'm drooling. Are you drooling yet? No, seriously. This is the kind of thing you don't just eat, you experience it. Okay. Haagen Dazs elevated crafted ice cream is always meant to be savored. So whatever flavor you choose, slow down and enjoy each bite. Seriously, it's too good to rush. I grew up with Haagen Dazs in my house.

• 1:10:58Speaker 00

  Every single night, my family and I would eat our favorite flavors. I'm obsessed with the cherry dark chocolate bar. Those flavors together, I couldn't be happier. I'm going to watch my favorite TV shows and I'm going to be eating that. Boom, done. Take your sweet time. That's Dazs. Available at retailers nationwide.

• 1:11:15Speaker 01

  Nowadays, you have certain expectations when you fly, like people napping on the airport floor or flying in your pajamas. You know what you don't expect? Free drinks. But now T-Mobile members get a free premium drink when they fly Delta Airlines. So just sit back, relax and switch to T-Mobile today. Visit tmobile.com/membership for details. It's better over here.

• 1:11:39Speaker 01

  Get a free premium Delta drink with eligible plan and link SkyMiles account 24 hours before qualifying. Flight required. Must be 21 or older. See T life for terms.