Red Flag or Overthinking?

This week, Alex checks in from her pregnancy to discuss her latest obsession, Love Island. She then answers listeners’ questions about friendship jealousy, relationship anxiety, family expectations, difficult conversations, and the difference between a red flag and a fear. From Facetune drama to a boyfriend whose mom still monitors his bank account, no question is off limits. Enjoy!

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Alex Cooper?

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• 0:45Alex Cooper?

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• 1:30Alex Cooper?

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• 2:10Alex Cooper?

  Hello Daddy Gang, welcome back to another Sunday session. We have so much to catch up on. It is going to be such a good, good Sunday. So I just recorded a full solo episode about my pregnancy journey and that comes out very, very soon. Maybe even this week. I don't know. We'll see. But I'm really excited to share everything that has been going on in my life because girl, it's been a lot. Okay. But one thing I can tell you about my pregnancy right now,

• 2:48Alex Cooper?

  it is giving me the most perfect excuse to lie down, kick my feet up, lean into my 12 different pregnancy pillows and watch Love Island all summer long. Every single night, except for of course Wednesday, because no new Love Island episodes on Wednesdays. And also Wednesday is Call Her Daddy Day, which kind of works out perfectly. But every other night of the week, you will find me on the couch with my heating pad, cranked up, surrounded by all of my pregnancy favorite snacks, getting hype the minute I hear, "Tonight, a hot new bombshell enters the villa." Boom. I'm like, "Yeah."

• 3:32Alex Cooper?

  Matt walks in the door. I'm like, "Get out. Get out." He's like, "Wait." Matt is low-key getting like already invested, even though he said he wasn't going to watch it with me this year. He's already invested. I love it so much, you guys, and I love it even more now that I am pregnant because it's not like I am just watching TV, right? I am taking care of myself. This is self-care through and through. So let's talk a little Love Island, season eight, shall we? Oh my God. Okay. I, where do I begin? I feel like this season is

• 4:10Alex Cooper?

  It's already a lot, right? I mean, before episode one even dropped, the internet was, you know,

• 4:18Alex Cooper?

  being the internet, stalking the cast, canceling the cast. It was just like chaos before night one even aired. That's such a testament to the fandom. Um, and I will say the past two seasons, and I think we can all collectively agree. The past two seasons of Love Island have been top tier reality television. There is no denying that. I don't care if you didn't like the cast or you didn't like certain. It was a cultural phenomenon, both seasons, and each season individually. They broke the internet, right? And so now I can't help but be so fascinated to see if this new season, season eight, will be able to not only maintain that level of hype and traction,

• 4:59Alex Cooper?

  but maybe even top it. Cause I feel like last year, everyone said like, oh, this isn't gonna be, you know, season six, and then all of a sudden it was as big, right? So let's see what season eight can do. Regardless, I'm gonna be watching. Um, wow. Okay. I just remember when I had, let's do a little throwback. When I had Rob and Leah on from season six,

• 5:24Alex Cooper?

  I will never forget Rob showing up in those overalls, his fresh tan. Leah coming straight from Fiji, showing up like in like the most gorgeous woman I'd ever seen in that black corset. Remember her like perfect posture, the entire episode? That was incredible. And then fast forward a year later, and obviously I had on Amaya and Huda last season for season seven. And that was even more dramatic, I feel like than the previous year. And I will say that was the first time, guys, that I had ever recorded two episodes of Call Her Daddy in one day, back to back. Like I wrote them both back to back, recorded them both back to back. My brain was mush.

• 6:10Alex Cooper?

  But I also like loved it. The adrenaline was so high because that is the thrill in just the rush of it, right? Like everything moves so freaking fast on the internet. Um, and to kind of give you like some behind the scenes of the thought process for Call Her Daddy. Basically throughout each season of Love Island so far, my team and I tried to predict who we thought was going to be the noisiest and the most dramatic of that specific season. So I could invite them on the show and start prepping their interview. But last season was truly so up and down all the way until the very end.

• 6:48Alex Cooper?

  So this year I am definitely without a doubt going to be following along on Polymarket. I am going to be refreshing and checking the Love Island odds every single day. That's all I've been doing every single day and it's only been a week. It's only been a week, but here I am. Um, I'm going to be checking it multiple times a day just so that I can be up to date with what the public is feeling about this cast and this season. By the time this comes out, we're what, five episodes in, 30 more to go. Everyone's like, oh, it's 30 more to go. Plus people on Polymarket already are trading on who they think are going to win. Like, I bet it's different than when I last looked.

• 7:33Alex Cooper?

  Okay, are you ready? So the woman that they think is going to win currently, oh my, literally guys, the numbers are changing as I'm watching it. So Bea is number one, but it keeps slipping with Anaya. Bea and Anaya are like tied almost, it's going from 49 to 50%. Okay, then Trinity and Kenzie. I love Trinity and Kenzie so much, the two of them have my heart. Kenzie, we love you and we love the drama. This is my life, me, just like refreshing, refreshing, refreshing. Honestly, I really love the commitment that we don't even know who is going to last as couples, okay? And these people don't even know each other yet, guys.

• 8:13Alex Cooper?

  It is still, as they say, early days on Love Island, but the internet and Polymarket will always have an opinion, which I love to see. So I'll be updating myself every single day. To all the ladies and gentlemen out there who are about to sell their soul and indulge in a Love Island summer. Disclaimer, I am not saying this is going to become a Love Island podcast. Don't worry, don't worry. Just like I said, this isn't a pet pregnancy podcast, right? Right, right, right. We've got a lot of different topics to cover. But you can definitely count on your girl to be closely following along. Belly out, snacks on deck, and getting really, really, really into it. I would love to know who you guys think currently is going to come on Call Her Daddy?

• 8:58Alex Cooper?

  Cause I have no clue. Um, okay. So that's a little life update. Guys, I feel like there's, that's gonna, ugh. It's pregnancy in Love Island. Oh, and I also am rereading Throne of Glass. So that's kind of my entire summer. And I don't know where to fit any other thing in other than those three things. So I'll keep you updated. Um, but without further ado, I think we should get into some questions of the week.

• 9:41Alex Cooper?

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• 10:23Alex Cooper?

  And when you give me that plus a good chocolate, I'm gonna have that in my freezer. Every single night, I'm gonna pop one in. I am obsessed. I love it so much. Taste the joy with every bite of My Mochi Ice Cream. Look for the green and brown box of My Mochi Dubai Chocolate Ice Cream. In the freezer aisle of your local grocery store. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own and creating looks and spaces just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home, drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches, Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life.

• 11:06Alex Cooper?

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• 11:51Alex Cooper?

  So your customers can shop wherever they already are and your products can appear directly alongside content. So as someone is scrolling, they just become part of their feed. Shopify truly makes it so much easier for customers to discover and buy products wherever they're browsing. And this has been such a game changer for Unwell. I love being able to sell merch directly on all the Call Her Daddy channels. So everything is in one place for the daddy gang. So, ready to add entrepreneur to your list of accomplishments? Head to Shopify.com/daddy. That's Shopify.com/daddy. Here we go. First question is honestly really fucked up, so we need to discuss this.

• 12:36Alex Cooper?

  "Hi Daddy, so my best friend posted a photo of us and I thought I looked weird. So I compared the posted photo to the one I have and she face tuned it, which is all fine and dandy, but she made herself look skinnier and me look fatter. I am so unbelievably upset because why would my best friend since elementary school make me look bad? I just don't know how to address this. I understand society makes women feel like we have to be perfect, but why face tuned me to look worse? I just don't get it."

• 13:06Alex Cooper?

  Girl, your best friend is literally an op. Hold on. So when I read this, I was like, there's just no way. There's just no way. And knowing the ins and outs of Facetune, I like, I had to believe for a second. I'm like, maybe she did the thing where like, she's pulling in her rib cage. Do you know what I mean? And she's kind of like slicing herself in on all angles. And she's editing herself so focused. She's like, okay, and then bring my hip to here, hip to here, and then bring this here, this here. And she has no concept of what's happening to the right, which happens to just be your glorious body. And you just got like the shit

• 13:48Alex Cooper?

  end of it. Um, you've seen people sometimes when they're facetuning and then all of a sudden, if they're moving like the back wall, just completely, they forgot to like fix that or something. But I have to believe, I have to believe that your best friend did not then be like, settings approved, make myself look like a Victoria's Secret model. Now let's turn to this bitch. And then she was like, expando Patronum, expando Patronum. Like, I refuse. I refuse to, I, I believe in girlhood. I believe in humanity that I just, I can't, I can't, I can't accept it for you and I can't accept it for all of us. So I think

• 14:32Alex Cooper?

  what you could do is you could text her and, because you guys, we've all seen that kind of on the internet. Have you guys ever seen those trends where you facetuned someone or you like make their forehead look huge and then they send it to the person being like, do you care if I post this? And then the person has a mental breakdown. They're like, wait, bro, like, that's not what I look like. And they're like, what do you mean? Like, look at my forehead. Like, I have a 12 head. Like, the fuck? I don't think your friend is playing a prank on you, but I do think you have the right to just text her and be like, wait, girl, I've been like sick over this and I just have to acknowledge it. My body is fully distorted in the picture and I've gone so crazy and I've looked at

• 15:16Alex Cooper?

  the original like what happened here? You have to, have to, have to ask her what happened and I, you have to tell us what her answer is. Okay, next question. Dude, Facetune, like you can just get so carried away, especially when you're own, in your own world with it and you're like, and then when you're staring at something for too long, like anything in life, all of a sudden you go from just a cute little like, I'm just gonna smooth the skin to all of a sudden like, you don't have cheeks, you know? And actually, your eyelids are gone because you smoothed yourself so much that you look like a crescent moon and it gets scary.

• 16:01Alex Cooper?

  So you should usually, if you're gonna use that kind of equipment, you should check with people and be like, what do you think of this photo? And then hopefully one of your friends is like, it's awesome if it wasn't 15 times edited way too far. Okay. I am dating a guy who's 31 and on paper, basically perfect, great job, emotionally intelligent, close to his family, has a solid group of friends, genuinely seems like a good person, but he recently told me he's never had a relationship longer than maybe six months. He says he was focused on working for a long time and just hadn't met the right person. Is this actually not that weird and I'm overanalyzing? Or is getting to your mid 30s with zero long-term relationship experience a legitimate red flag?

• 16:45Alex Cooper?

  I love and hate these questions where I'm like, they're so, oh, there's like, almost like too much to say. I'm trying to put myself in your shoes because when I met Matt.

• 17:05Alex Cooper?

  I loved that he had long-term relationships, had experience.

• 17:13Alex Cooper?

  You know, wasn't, I wasn't gonna be like the first to really be like, let's move in together. And he's like, I've never lived with a woman. Like, that kind of freaked me out in previous relationships because I felt like there wasn't a maturity to it, even if it wasn't either of our fault. It's just, you're going through things in a way that like, it's nice when you both have done it before to a capacity, because then you just get to be better versions of yourself at doing it. I do think men in their mid-30s, only having six months' relationship, I would say, isn't, wouldn't have probably been for me. However, I don't think it's a complete 100% right off red flag. I, like, anything I usually say on this podcast, I

• 17:56Alex Cooper?

  do think that you need to have context clues, like they teach us in school. And you know what? Every fucking time a teacher told me back when I was young and trying to not fail out, it's like, just look for the context clues, Alex, when I would go up and be like, can you help me? And they're like, just look at the context clues. Like, fuck you and your context clues. Give me the fucking answer, bitch. But now I happen to be that annoying fucking teacher that's like, just look at the context clues. Um, but it's true, especially when it comes to dating men, because I think when you're dating a man, there's so much in dating that can be misconstrued because of our past, because of things that have, you know, triggered us in the past, or not worked in the past, or worked in the past,

• 18:41Alex Cooper?

  right? And so, if he has had this one thing and you're so focused on it, but what if, what about this? His apartment is spectacular, he's clean, he's organized, he is on time for everything, he's so respectful of you, he is making an effort, he has a great job. The way he talks about his relationships in the past is not like, she was a crazy fucking bitch. Like, All you know what I'm saying? It's like, what is the full picture? And I always feel like whenever someone's writing in, because I feel like I would have done this in the past. When you're writing something like this in it, I can't help but wonder. If there's other things that he's doing in this relationship with you that is eluding.

• 19:23Alex Cooper?

  Or that is making you feel like shit and he's and he's only ever had a relationship like. The longest being six months. You know what I mean? It's like, that is the tipping point and the biggest thing you can use to kind of call out this feeling of unease. When if that really was just the if I had met Matt and Matt had every quality he had when I met him. But his one thing was he had only had six months relationships. I would have read the room a little bit and like been like, okay, I don't love it, but let's see if everything else is perfect and like really working. Then fuck that shit. I'll be the like, I'm down to be the first long term one because everything else is great. So. Context clues. But.

• 20:09Alex Cooper?

  I don't love it. And I could get shit for that, but I.

• 20:16Alex Cooper?

  I don't love it because you know what? I look back at one of my relationships that was one of my. More stable. Potential relationships where like I was in love and this and it wasn't toxic. But he had not really had long term relationships and there was just a different feeling. And maybe it's like a guy thing. I don't know, but like I could just feel.

• 20:43Alex Cooper?

  That when we like are the building towards a future just felt kind of like this. Not even a factor. Um, whereas meeting someone like a Matt, it's like he had a foundation. He had goals. He had. A vision for what he wanted his life to look like, and he talked about that very openly. Talked about things he didn't like in previous relationships, was very open about things he loved in previous relationships that he respected of the people. So like. I think I need someone who has the ability to. Talk about their past in a way that's not hiding or. Um, fearful of it and somewhat I needed someone who was like very honest and open. And was mature.

• 21:25Alex Cooper?

  And so my fear is six months gives like, what the fuck is six months? Sorry, but like six months means like you're just getting close and then it ends. Cause six months is like low key, it's a little short. Like at least if it was a year, I'd be like, all right, bro got close to like, it always ended right before they moved in together kind of vibe. Girl, I'm sorry. That's tough. When you use the context clues, you are gonna know without a doubt. Oh, well, yeah, you're right, Alex, that I was just like avoiding acknowledging the fact that the six months thing is also like, he and his, he has multiple roommates and he hasn't had the same job.

• 22:04Alex Cooper?

  Um, he changes jobs every also six months and his room smells like cat litter and he doesn't have a cat. You know? Okay, next.

• 22:31Alex Cooper?

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Airbnb. Okay, I am well into my third trimester now, so I haven't really been able to travel because I need to stay close to my doctor. But spending all this time at home has made me start thinking about all the places that I want to go. Once the baby is here. I have literally been sitting on my couch with the TV on scrolling through Airbnb and planning trips. I am nowhere ready to take yet, but suddenly my vacation priorities, I will say are completely different. Like, does the house have enough bedrooms? Is there a big kitchen? Does the furniture look baby safe or is every table covered in, you know, sharp corners?

• 23:11Alex Cooper?

  And obviously we need an extra room for my mom, who has already made it very clear that she will not be leaving my side. She's like, I got you. I'm the babysitter. Okay. And now that it is October. I'm picturing cooler weather, cozy sweaters. Oh my God, maybe a little cottage where we can escape for a little weekend. That's what I love about booking a home on Airbnb. Whether you're traveling with family, friends, or your partner, everyone has space to relax while still being together. Even if you're traveling for a concert or a game, you have one place where everyone can get together and convene after. Before the holiday season gets busy, treat yourself to one more fall getaway and check out Airbnb while you're planning it. This is a paid ad by BetterHelp.

• 23:56Alex Cooper?

  So anytime that I am finding myself having a habit that I just cannot kick, I'm like, okay, I need to talk about this in therapy. Listen, guys, everyone has habits, mindsets, or patterns that don't serve them. But recognizing what they are and learning how to let them go can be so important. It's literally the first step towards creating meaningful change. And therapy with BetterHelp, one of the leading online therapy platforms, can be a space to explore where those patterns come from and develop healthier habits and mindsets for a more fulfilling life. With over 30,000 therapists worldwide, BetterHelp has served millions of people globally. BetterHelp makes it easier to fit therapy into your routine with flexible ways to connect that work for different schedules and lifestyles.

• 24:38Alex Cooper?

  Plus, BetterHelp therapists have at least three years and 1,000 hours on hand experience and hold all required education, training, and certifications. You can meet with a range of professionals from marriage and family therapists to social workers and counselors. So Daddy Gang, if you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/daddy. That's better H E L P dot com slash daddy. I have an issue that's been coming up in my relationship. I have been dating my boyfriend for over 2.5 years, and he's recently brought up the topic of engagement and that he wants to propose within the next year.

• 25:23Alex Cooper?

  I feel annoyed that it's expected of me to change my last name instead of him changing his or us doing something hyphenated. We are planning on starting a family, and I feel annoyed that I'm the one that's expected to bend on this just because I'm the woman. Any advice on this would be super appreciated.

• 25:40Alex Cooper?

  Oh, yikes, yikes, yikes.

• 25:45Alex Cooper?

  There are so many feelings I have towards this topic because...

• 25:52Alex Cooper?

  I feel like men are so traditional with this point because they have truly never had to even conceptualize what it would feel like if we went with the woman's side. How, how classic is that in the world? Like, men have never had to question their name and their lineage and the history behind that last name and forfeiting it for a new one. Um, they've never had to think about that.

• 26:33Alex Cooper?

  The privilege, it just oozes privilege. How nice. Rule number 955 of why it's great to have a fucking penis. And so I think because historically, and I'm not giving them any fucking grace on this, I'm just talking it through with us as women, because men have never had to even think of this concept, the minute it's brought up by if they are with someone who is a little bit more progressive or liberal or whatever it be, I think it stops them in their tracks because again, they've never thought about it. And so when you have never thought about something and on top of

• 27:15Alex Cooper?

  never thinking about something, when something has just been a prerequisite in your life, like, duh, of course, it's like, oh, and, and my name is John, like, my name is John and my last name is Smith, and of course, my name is going to be John Smith for the rest of my life. Why wouldn't it be? And as young women, we grow up and there is a concept of like, oh my gosh, my name is Alex Cooper, but one day would I change my name? Will I change my name for a man? And, and, and we all go through it too in the fun way of like, oh my God, what if you met a guy named like Larry McCarleton first and Wadabon? And you're like, how would Alex McCarson first and Wadabon sound? Like, how do you even spell that? And like, would I want that on my ID? And like, would I want that

• 27:59Alex Cooper?

  as my presentation? Like, because Cooper sounds kind of better than that. You know what I mean? We go through that in our fucking head and men don't have to ever think about that until recently. Until recently, we as women, in a beautiful way, have started to wake the fuck up and be like, huh.

• 28:20Alex Cooper?

  Let's have a, even, even if you're so down to take his last name, you're like, but we should have a conversation about it, right? Cause like, I'm an individual, you're an individual, we're merging our lives and like, we want to, if you want to change your last names and have the same last name, whether it's just because you're in love and you want to do that, or it is traditional and you like that tradition, or you want to have the same last name for your children, whatever it be, we should talk about it, right? And when a man is unwilling to talk about it, that is where the turnoff begins for me. And it sounds like what you're saying is, your boyfriend is kind of, you're kind of having this conversation by yourself. And that's why you're writing into me, you're like, hey, girl, uh, mind if I just talk this one through with you right now?

• 29:03Alex Cooper?

  Cause I don't know where else to go, cause Rico is basically shutting me out. Oh, this is really complicated because I think that there's a lot of angles here that you need to consider. Number one being,

• 29:20Alex Cooper?

  and I hate even saying this, and you just have to be honest with yourself, does your boyfriend respect women? And I know that actually sounds so crazy that I'm even asking that, because it actually sounds like, people will be like, of course he does. But like, no, no, no, no, like, does he respect women in the sense that like, you are truly equal to him? Does he respect women in the sense that like, if you brought this up, is his rebuttal going to be, I would never take your fucking last name, that's, that's literally not how this goes, that is, that would never happen. A man doesn't take a woman's name, you take my la, and it's all this like, very sexist speech essentially.

• 30:02Alex Cooper?

  That is my biggest fear for a lot of us when we get into these dynamics, because when you are in a heterodynamic, there's a lot of dynamics where sometimes that like, undertone of misogyny and sexism doesn't have to boil to the surface, because a lot of times, just in your day to day life, like, he's lovely, he opens the door for you, but, but he really likes his masculine position in your life and the minute, and you've never really had to clash and question it. You've never had to ask him, well, what if I took a little bit of the masculinity and you are in your femininity? And what, the minute that happens, if it's like, get the fuck away from me, I feel like that's a red flag.

• 30:46Alex Cooper?

  I remember when Matt and I had met, so much of what I now in hindsight was doing aside from like wanting to protect my independence and my identity was like, I was constantly temperature checking with him to be like, I don't know if I ever want to get married. And he was like, okay, like, so what, like, you're like, but you're down for like life partner or what it like, and he was like interested in what I was saying. And I was like, yeah, I think I'm down for a life partner. I just like, and I would be committed and all of that. But like, I don't know if I like legally need the binding agreement. He was like, that is completely fine with me. And then we would talk through kids and like how we would want to raise kids in that dynamic. Like, he went there with me. And then I was

• 31:30Alex Cooper?

  the one after almost like, two years of dating, where I was like, I want to move in together now, after he had asked me and I had said, no, poor Matt, he asked me to move in. I was like, no. Then like, I eventually turned around. I was like, I'm ready. And everything had to be on my own terms. I think because I was just super hypersensitive to the fact of like, as women, it's hard not to, and I know this is not for everyone. It just really for me, I needed to make sure that I was asserting some form of power in all of the guys that I've ever dated. And a lot of them, when I did any form of this, it was like, pushback, resistance, and if anything, maybe even a breakup. And with Matt, everything I tested, it was like, oh, my God, wait, this is the dream, the way he's responding.

• 32:14Alex Cooper?

  When it came to our names and everything, that was a conversation that Matt was like, I would never, ever, ever ask you to change your name. And I was like, I'm not like 100% opposed, actually, weirdly, um, it to do a hyphenated thing. I just want to think about it. One, from the standpoint of my public situation and two, for our kids. And so we had a lot of conversations about that. I know this is kind of long winded. I think, I think it's like, it's too hard to just give you a quick answer, though. I think you are someone who clearly is having a adverse reaction to your boyfriend is giving you clearly not the response you want. And not even just that, the fact that you're writing like, I'm expected.

• 32:57Alex Cooper?

  I don't love that for you. And so I think that my advice is like, you need to sit him down and you need to be honest, because if this is actually the person that you are going to spend the rest of your life with, you clearly are a very smart person and you seem like you have boundaries and you respect yourself, right? And so you're like, wait a second, you're asking the right questions. I'm not, even if you take his last name, you should be asking, well, wait a second, like, why do I have to do that? And then everyone's rebuttal, I love it when everyone's rebuttal is, well, every single one of us has a man's last name, and isn't that fucking ironic?

• 33:38Alex Cooper?

  Well, your last name Cooper is from a man, I know. And isn't that ironic?

• 33:44Alex Cooper?

  That all of us just have men's last names. I know.

• 33:53Alex Cooper?

  That can just start the book. If we're writing like a misogyny patriarchy book, that's it, right? Like, boom, because it's like, what the fuck? And now we're all waking up to it. So I, you, you're, you have every right to be asking that question. I also want to clarify, if there's any woman watching this, that's like, I didn't ask, I wanted to take his last name, that is so your decision. And I so respect you for that. That's so, so fair. And I totally get it. Also, there's really lovely things about tradition, right? And sometimes you don't need to think too much into it. But as a woman, this, this is something that it is fair to ask the question about, because guess what? I'm about to push a baby out of my fucking vagina. And all these women, and then we just, I do all this work, and then we put the man's last

• 34:36Alex Cooper?

  name on the baby, like, there, it begs to have some questions and some conversations. So have the conversation with him. And if he completely shuts you down, and he's a misogynistic pig, and he's like, I don't really give a fuck, probably not your husband.

• 34:54Alex Cooper?

  Girl, that just fucking riled me up. But I do think that's the point is like,

• 35:00Alex Cooper?

  what, what we're missing is like, it is so okay to go with tradition, but you have to make sure that you're doing it because you're like, oh yeah, like that's fun and nice and like, I, I, I'm down, yeah. But we had the conversation and I know you respect me and this is a mutual decision that we've both made and we've talked through incessantly and we both feel really good about it. You didn't just get to make the decision and be like, if not, like I'll go find another fucking bitch that will do it. Like I'm not going to put up with this. And then you just have to like scurry and chase after him and like go along with it. That's not how you have to live your life. Okay. How should I think about it when my long-term boyfriend is invited to weddings without me in general?

• 35:44Alex Cooper?

  But specifically when the person knows me and is connected to his family?

• 35:51Alex Cooper?

  I don't like this. I don't like this at all. And I don't like this because I hate doing this, but my first question is like, what have you been up to? I don't like looking at the daddy gang with suspicious eyes, but I'm like, what's going on? What's going on over there? Because to not be getting that invite multiple times,

• 36:16Alex Cooper?

  multiple times. It's one thing if it's one, you know, like they're keeping it tight or budget's tight or something and like they didn't give plus ones. Multiple weddings.

• 36:30Alex Cooper?

  Franny's getting left behind. What's Franny been up to? Cause my gut

• 36:38Alex Cooper?

  worries and says, because people don't want you there. And I hate that answer because I'm defensive of you already because I'm like, you're daddy gang, you're writing in. But then I'm like, okay, so let's talk it through. Why the fuck would people be inviting your boyfriend to all these different weddings? And you've been in long-term relationship with this person? These are people you also know and he's the one getting the invite? Okay, two things. Number one. Either, this is like, these are really extremes and I hope I'm wrong on both of them, but I, this is the only context I have, so spare me. Um, number one. You would be really upset to find out how your boyfriend talks about you. And what I mean by that is there's a potential that all of these people aren't inviting you

• 37:23Alex Cooper?

  because behind the scenes, the way he speaks about you and he is close enough with these people that he has an understanding that you're not getting invited. And that's for a reason. And then he goes and he lives his best life at these weddings. And like, this may not be, this may be a relationship that doesn't have a foundation of honesty. Like, I don't know. I'm not saying he's fucking bitches at these weddings, but like, okay, that's like my fucked up pregnancy brain going like, oh my God, this is bad. And then the other way that, oh my God, this is bad is like, you drink too much. You talk over everyone. You're loud. You're ruining nights where everyone's trying to have a good time.

• 38:05Alex Cooper?

  You're rude. You're mean. You're not self-aware. Like, again, I'm not actually saying this about you, but I'm just trying to rack my brain of like, what would warrant no invite? The only thing I also think, I hate, I'm not going to name this episode context clues, but honestly, context clues. Um, how does your boyfriend respond when you don't get invited? That interests me. That would tickle my brain to know the answer to that because if he's, I'm picturing it, you're in the kitchen. The save the date comes in. He opens it. Babe, what's that? Oh, uh, nothing. You're like, no, what is it?

• 38:45Alex Cooper?

  Oh, um, Marty and Fern are getting married this summer. Oh, my God. We, I'm so excited for them. Where is it? Where are we going?

• 38:57Alex Cooper?

  Nah, uh, not we. Me. And you're like, huh? And he's like, it, uh, it's for me. I didn't get a plus one. And then you're like, what, what do you mean, Todd? Like, I'm your girl. I'm Franny. Like, come on, Todd. Like, we go everywhere together, Todd. And he's like, I'm so sorry, babe. Like, yeah, you didn't get the invite this time. And then he just walks off.

• 39:24Alex Cooper?

  Then Todd's in on it, Franny, okay? Because what the appropriate reaction would be, "What the fuck?" Like, I don't know. They know we've been together for so long. That's fucked up. I didn't get a plus one. Like, should I call and ask? Like, I don't want to be rude, but like, obviously, I'm not going to go without you. That's just like fucked up. So like, I, I don't know. If like, if they're close enough, he'll talk to the person. If they're not close enough, maybe I'm not going. Like, I don't know. There would be back and forth of you guys trying to dissect, "Why the fuck am I not getting invited?" And that doesn't seem like it's happening. And you're just kind of like sitting in the corner like, "Have fun at the wedding, Todd." And he's like, "I'll be back, Franny." That's fucking crazy. If when Matt and I were dating and we're like

• 40:08Alex Cooper?

  five years in and he's going off to these weddings and I wasn't getting invited?

• 40:13Alex Cooper?

  Oh, my God.

• 40:16Alex Cooper?

  I think there's something going on and you really need to get to the bottom of it, but I don't think I have enough, I don't have enough information to answer this one for you. But it's one of, I think it could be one of the two that I just offered. And I don't like either of those for you. So I'm here for you and please write in, "What the fuck happened?" Because mm-mm, I don't like that, Franny. I don't like that at all. Okay.

• 40:52Alex Cooper?

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• 41:37Alex Cooper?

  with over 200 career-focused programs, where you want with 100% online courses, and how you want with no set class times. Basically, you get to call the shots from day one. Visit snhu.edu/callherdaddy to learn more.

• 41:54Alex Cooper?

  I recently learned that my 32-year-old boyfriend still uses a primary bank account that's linked to his mom.

• 42:02Alex Cooper?

  The signs were there for a long time, but now I don't think I can look past it anymore. He has an appointment for a new tattoo soon and told me that he's worried his mom will notice the large charge on his, his, on his bank account, babe. It's Gloria's. It's not his. Um, and she will criticize for him, both the money and the tattoo. I think it's time for him to grow up and be more independent of his mom and get his own fucking bank account. How do I have a serious conversation with him about this? This is bad. This is really bad. This is really bad. I don't like this at all. Let's talk.

• 42:42Alex Cooper?

  First of all, sharing a bank account with your mother at 32 years old as a grown man and, and it not being like he's sending his mom money and helping her out, or even like she's helping him out because he was going through a hard time. Sharing a bank account? I want to know what else they're sharing.

• 43:07Alex Cooper?

  I want to know what else is going on. I want to know what Fred and Gloria's relationship is like because I have a feeling Fred and Gloria, I don't like this. And I don't like this for you specifically because let's put Fred and Gloria over here. Son and mommy. What I don't like for you, Patricia, is that Patricia is, we're already seeing a little dynamic that's being created that, what's his name? Fred? Fred. That's also my dead dog's name from childhood. Shout out. He was a good one.

• 43:47Alex Cooper?

  I don't like for you, Patricia, that there's already a mommy-son dynamic that seems, um, no bueno, unhealthy. Mother-son dynamics like that, where there it's just a little like crank of the head like, you just, you gotta be careful when you're the girlfriend coming in because there's a couple of things going on. Number one, it could be really fucking, like you're just like, I literally am dating a mama's boy and this is just fucking crazy. And she would literally take him till the end with their bank accounts merged. As long as he's like still sucking off the teat. Or number two, when he does disengage and dislodge from said mother's bank account, which I would love to know what the actual ratio of their money is together because why do I feel like he's just,

• 44:29Alex Cooper?

  it's Gloria's bank account and Fred is living off Gloria, you know what I mean? Cause how do you, how do, how would we divide the assets when the time comes if all of it's merged together? That's fucking crazy. Think about that. I merged my bank account with my dad. What the fuck would you, what the, how the fu- what? But if he disengages and it's like, okay, goodbye Gloria, why do I feel like now it's just your fucking problem? It really does feel like this is fucking weird. I, I mean, again, people may come for me and my immediate response will just be pregnancy brain, I don't know. Oh, maybe, but I really think I could be right on this one. Guys, times are crazy.

• 45:11Alex Cooper?

  I think that any man that has a merged bank account with his mother, and if it is not for him to be helping his mother, this is a red flag through and motherfucking through. And the fact that he is worried that his mother is going to get upset with his financial spending on his new big ass fuck ass tattoo, who the fuck is this man? His name is not Fred. Fred sounds honestly intelligent and a little too fucking with it. He, Fred is a stockbroker or is in some type of tech. This guy's name, what the fuck is this guy's name? His name is like. Fuck. I've got it. I've got it. Justin.

• 45:52Alex Cooper?

  Justin. Sorry Fred. Justin. Also RIP. Sorry Fred. My dog was way better than this, okay? Justin and Gloria, it is so not your problem. And so, again, I think you need to look at your life. This man is 32 years old. What else has been going on? Do you pay for every meal? Or is Justin putting on his mommy's card? What happens when mommy's card goes away? Have you asked Justin this? My gut says, sit him down if you want. But you could also run.

• 46:32Alex Cooper?

  You could also hightail it the fuck out of there, you know? You could also pivot so quickly and just get yourself a guy that you don't even have to ask to send this kind of question in. Cause I don't know. I just don't like it. I just feel like men and their mothers. If there's any weird shit like that, it really freaks me out. I had dated a mama's boy before, and let me just tell you, I have nightmares about some of those interactions, stories, and light things that I was like, this feels...

• 47:09Alex Cooper?

  You know what I mean? I don't even need to add in the statement. So I guess my, the moral of this story is, if you ever date a mama's boy and it is verging on

• 47:21Alex Cooper?

  that like question mark face where you're like, I just don't know if I'm seeing this right. You are. You're seeing it right. It's him and his mom and they're fucking weird. And you need to excuse yourself from the dinner table and get up and leave and never come back. Even if you leave some of your stuff there. But maybe he's like such a good guy. And honestly, I'm being dramatic. That'll like save it in case I have like any of these like type of people online that are like, that's so crazy. That that will kind of cushion it. But maybe Justin's such a good guy. And maybe it's just a one off and he just wanted the new tat and then everything's going to go back to normal and you're totally fine. But I do agree, he should eventually split ties with his mom. I would love to know, like, well, Justin, like, how would that work? Why don't you ask him?

• 48:05Alex Cooper?

  Like, what's the um, uh, percentage of like your finances and hers in there? Like, who, how would you, how do you, how do you, how do you keep track? Walk me through that. Do you want to go to a financial planner together? Let's talk about it. Whip out your finances before you whip out your dick and we have sex one more time. Let's pause on our sexual relationship. Let's go whip out our finances. Let's have a little chat, Justin. Let's have a little transparency. And you know what? Bring Gloria. Bring Gloria down and let's do the thing.

• 48:39Alex Cooper?

  But like, maybe it's just like too fucking messy. Like, are you obsessed with this guy? Or you're just like, oh, I've been like, kind of dating him? I don't fucking know. Honestly, men are weird. And if anything gives you weird vibes, just, oh, I sometimes I think you have to run. Okay, that is it for this week's episode. I am so excited because the new episode of Love Island is on tonight. So that's what I will be doing. And ooh, what else is going on? Um, oh, I am going on a trip with my girlfriends coming up, which is very, very exciting. So I have a lot of packing to do, a lot of planning to do, a lot of work to get ahead on. Um, maybe going to get some new extensions put in my head. Oh, it's gonna hurt. It's gonna feel so good. But when in doubt, if you're feeling like shit

• 49:24Alex Cooper?

  about yourself, pop in a couple of extensions. And then all of a sudden, you're like, oh, we're so back. Um, and I kind of feel like that's, that's where I need to leave you guys for this Sunday. It was fun. It was weird. We used our context clues and

• 49:42Alex Cooper?

  I want to check Polly Market one more time.

• 49:49Alex Cooper?

  Dude. What? Now Melanie is this frontrunner. You guys, literally, I started this fucking episode and it was Bea and Anaya were at the top and now Melanie is expected to win. Let me tell, let me tell you something about Melanie. Melanie, it's hard with Love Island because drama is drama. Okay? And love or hate any of these people, drama is drama and that is what's entertaining. So it's too soon to judge any of these women. We can judge the men a little bit. It's too soon to judge these women, but I do think we have some really, really good television and good eggs on our hands. And it's so early in and there's already a lot going on. So

• 50:35Alex Cooper?

  I'm personally, ooh, mm, I'm gonna get my Sour Patch, my doughnuts, my In-N-Out, my ice cream. I'm gonna put my compression socks on and I'm gonna have the day, have, have the night of my life. Okay. Love you guys so much. Um, look out for a very, very, very, very, very exciting Wednesday episode this week and I will see you fuckers. Then goodbye.

• 51:17Alex Cooper?

  Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Ross. Fall is about finding pieces you love, making them your own and creating looks and spaces just right for the season. Whether you're updating a small apartment or a spacious home, drawn to timeless neutrals or bold seasonal touches. Ross makes it easy to imagine what's next and bring your fall vision to life. Ross makes fashion accessible to all with up to 20 to 60% off other retailers prices on the brands you love. Find your nearest Ross at rossstores.com. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Klavio. So Klavio says it's your brand's best friend.

• 51:57Alex Cooper?

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• 52:40Alex Cooper?

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