Katy Perry Goes To Mars

SUBSCRIBE TO THE BNC CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/45Pspyl Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://bit.ly/3OZxwpr MERCH: https://shoptmgstudios.com This week, Brooke and Connor are back in the studio asking the important questions like where’s space? Plus, Connor breaks down his moment that felt like Goofy’s yell and Brooke’s dad gets hacked to the gods. Join our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5356639204457124/ Try Captain Morgan Sweet Chili Lime, the newest flavor from Captain Morgan. Visit https://www.captainmorgan.com to find where to buy. Please Drink Responsibly. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://betterhelp.com/BANDC and get on your way to being your best self. Shop all 9 dreamy shades of YSL Loveshine Plumping Lip Oil Gloss now at Sephora: https://www.sephora.com/product/ysl-loveshine-plumping-lip-oil-gloss-with-hyaluronic-acid-P515552 Save $10 on your first purchase at https://storyworth.com/bandc. B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Hosted by Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, Created by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, and Produced by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood. Chapters: 0:00 Thank You Captain Morgan 0:14 Intro 0:34 Feeling Giddy Giddy 3:35 Turning Into A Fly 5:40 Stewart Little Realization 7:29 Live Show Prep 9:40 Dancing Too Hard 11:59 Captain Morgan 13:17 Betting Money On The Final Four 18:20 Moments That Felt Like Goofy’s Yell 21:50 BetterHelp 23:30 Connor Is Sally 31:00 Katy Perry Is Going To Space 33:40 Dream Submersible Rotation 35:25 YSL Beauty 36:40 Where Is Space? 46:40 It All Comes Back To Spongebob 48:22 Katy In Space 49:20 Storyworth 51:37 Living In The Good Old Days 56:50 Brooke’s Dad Gets Hacked 59:58 Brooke’s New Book 1:03:15 White Lotus Recap 1:14:38 Thank You Captain Morgan 1:14:51 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Brooke Averick?

  Ready.

• 0:00Connor Wood?

  I'm ready.

• 0:02Brooke Averick?

  Promotion.

• 0:05Connor Wood?

  Promotion, promotion. Wait, no.

• 0:08Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I'm ready, promotion.

• 0:10Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 0:11Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 0:11Connor Wood?

  There's also one that goes,

• 0:14Connor Wood?

  "I'm ready, I'm ready, I want those boots."

• 0:17Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, yeah, I like that one.

• 0:18Connor Wood?

  That one's good.

• 0:19Brooke Averick?

  But I'm thinking of the promotion.

• 0:21Connor Wood?

  I don't remember promotion.

• 0:23Brooke Averick?

  I'm ready, promotion. It's like a different beat. Yeah.

• 0:29Connor Wood?

  That guy has some beats up his sleeves. What up, y'all? It's Brooke and Connor. Again, we're here. And you know what?

• 0:36Brooke Averick?

  What?

• 0:36Connor Wood?

  This is gonna feel really fresh and new for a lot of people, because while we did record yesterday.

• 0:42Brooke Averick?

  Timeline's off for us a little bit.

• 0:44Connor Wood?

  Timeline's off, AWF.

• 0:47Brooke Averick?

  Can I say, can I give a little tease?

• 0:49Connor Wood?

  Yeah, you could tease.

• 0:50Brooke Averick?

  So basically, what happened was, this is our normal recording day. It's Wednesday. Um, the podcast comes out tomorrow. This one comes out tomorrow, but we've recorded one yesterday with a guest that will come out next week. And Connor and I are flying over the moon, giddy, about the guest that we had yesterday. There's before that guest, and there's after that guest.

• 1:12Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 1:13Brooke Averick?

  And we are living in the after right now, even though you guys are living in the before. And I'm so giddy.

• 1:20Connor Wood?

  It was a combo platter of-

• 1:21Brooke Averick?

  It was a combo platter.

• 1:23Connor Wood?

  It was our first time back in the studio yesterday. I texted in the morning, and I was just like, "I'm feeling insane." Just like, like shaking. I'm so excited to be back in the studio and and cooking up something good. And then it was also a combo of just like, it was such a fun episode.

• 1:37Brooke Averick?

  I was having nerves. Let's just say, this person has been there all along.

• 1:46Brooke Averick?

  But sometimes you don't know what's in front of your face until it's sitting next to you in the Kelly Clarkson's. This person has been there all along. I can't stress that enough.

• 2:18Connor Wood?

  Sometimes it's right under your nose and sometimes it's actually, it's actually a foot and a half over your nose as well, too.

• 2:25Brooke Averick?

  Sometimes it's a foot and a half over someone's nose. Sometimes you might go in for, um, sometimes one of you might go in for a handshake and one of you might go in for a hug, but it worked out.

• 2:35Connor Wood?

  And he might be just like nose deep in his navel, their navel.

• 2:39Brooke Averick?

  Just like armpit.

• 2:42Connor Wood?

  Oh, I forgot you're not like.

• 2:44Brooke Averick?

  I'm not?

• 2:44Connor Wood?

  Yeah, okay.

• 2:45Brooke Averick?

  Uh, anyway.

• 2:46Connor Wood?

  Anyway, like we're, yeah.

• 2:48Brooke Averick?

  Like, my god.

• 2:51Connor Wood?

  I know, it's kind of hard. There is, um, there's lingering lasting effects of.

• 2:55Brooke Averick?

  There's la- it's like a drug.

• 2:58Connor Wood?

  The Kesha said it best.

• 2:59Brooke Averick?

  We can still feel them in the space. I, I, I, I'm.

• 3:05Connor Wood?

  It was a good episode and it's gonna be so fun.

• 3:07Brooke Averick?

  It was a good episode, but more importantly, it's a long lasting connection that'll, that is part of my DNA.

• 3:14Connor Wood?

  Yeah, it is part of your DNA.

• 3:16Brooke Averick?

  And yours too now.

• 3:17Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I won't lie to you.

• 3:20Brooke Averick?

  My god.

• 3:22Connor Wood?

  Uh, well, it's good to be back. Um, welcome back into the stewed. We're having fun today. I had, did I ever tell you that my mom would have dreams while she was pregnant with me that I would come out as a fly?

• 3:36Brooke Averick?

  I honestly think you did say that. My mom thought I was gonna come out to the sound of Law and Order. Bum bum. Cause that's all she watched.

• 3:44Connor Wood?

  Oh.

• 3:44Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 3:45Connor Wood?

  But where would the sound come from?

• 3:46Brooke Averick?

  She just thought it would, somewhere. It would like over the speakers.

• 3:51Connor Wood?

  Like just divine intervention, they play the SVU.

• 3:55Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 3:56Connor Wood?

  Boom boom.

• 3:56Brooke Averick?

  Or somehow like I would, I would create the sound effect.

• 4:00Connor Wood?

  Wow, and it didn't?

• 4:02Brooke Averick?

  No, I don't think it did.

• 4:04Connor Wood?

  Well, those were dreams that my mom was having that I came out, just flew right out of the womb as a fly. And then they're like panicking and she would be scared and they took me home, like. It's a boy like here that swaddled me up as a, as a housefly and like handed my mom this like little young housefly. And she took me home and they're trying to like raise this young housefly. And they keep losing me and she would be like, I'm scared I'm gonna sit on him and yeah, I'm not gonna see him and I'll sit on him. And then I had a dream last night that I was a fly.

• 4:36Brooke Averick?

  Whoa.

• 4:37Connor Wood?

  Yeah, and I had was seeing

• 4:41Connor Wood?

  like lots of different views, like, cause they have eyes that are almost like kaleidoscopes.

• 4:46Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 4:46Connor Wood?

  Is my understanding. And it was awesome. It was great. So maybe I'm maybe I was born to be a fly on the wall.

• 4:53Brooke Averick?

  No, in one of the fantasy books I've read, um, one of the young men is a shapeshifter. And he shapeshifted into a fly for spying purposes.

• 5:02Connor Wood?

  That's a dream.

• 5:03Brooke Averick?

  And like, I was like, whoa.

• 5:05Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that's a dream. I would love.

• 5:07Brooke Averick?

  Neat. Cause you could slip under the cracks of the doors.

• 5:09Connor Wood?

  You can slip into a lot of cracks.

• 5:10Brooke Averick?

  You could slip into so many cracks.

• 5:12Connor Wood?

  You could slip into probably six cracks.

• 5:14Brooke Averick?

  You could.

• 5:15Connor Wood?

  If you needed to.

• 5:16Brooke Averick?

  Yep.

• 5:18Connor Wood?

  No, and that's like what I came in this morning. I was like, I need to remember to tell Brooke about my dream that I was a fly. And now I said it out loud and I'm like, why did I?

• 5:25Brooke Averick?

  No, thank you for sharing. It's like Stuart Little. By the way, guess who the dad in Stuart Little is?

• 5:32Connor Wood?

  Who?

• 5:33Brooke Averick?

  I said, guess.

• 5:34Connor Wood?

  Oh.

• 5:35Brooke Averick?

  Cause it's like, you don't make the connection until you watch Stuart Little as an adult and you're like, that's who that is?

• 5:41Connor Wood?

  Wait, can I pull up? Can we see a picture of him?

• 5:43Brooke Averick?

  Well, that gives it away.

• 5:44Connor Wood?

  Oh, well, how would I?

• 5:45Brooke Averick?

  Okay, it's House.

• 5:48Connor Wood?

  Oh, wow. Yeah. Who's the mom? That mom.

• 5:52Brooke Averick?

  I don't know if I know the mom as well as I know Dr. House, M.D.

• 5:57Connor Wood?

  That young mother was everyone's mother.

• 6:01Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I mean, I've definitely seen her.

• 6:02Connor Wood?

  During that time. What's her name? Gina Davis.

• 6:05Brooke Averick?

  Gina Davis.

• 6:07Connor Wood?

  Who?

• 6:07Brooke Averick?

  Yep.

• 6:08Connor Wood?

  Did Stuart Little, the, the actor of Stuart Little, end up becoming anyone? I guess he's an animated mouse.

• 6:14Brooke Averick?

  Who voiced him? I, I think he was a famous voice.

• 6:19Connor Wood?

  There's nothing that pisses me off more than Stuart Little being voiced by Michael J. Fox.

• 6:24Brooke Averick?

  Why does that piss you off?

• 6:24Connor Wood?

  You're not a mouse. Stuart Little is a little boy. A little boy can't be... Michael J. Fox can't be an orphan mouse.

• 6:33Brooke Averick?

  You can be anything that you want to be. Remember when I told you if you close your eyes, you could picture that you're anything?

• 6:38Connor Wood?

  I don't want to picture... I guess I just said I'm a fly. I want to be a fly. But Michael J. Fox is not allowed to be a mouse.

• 6:45Brooke Averick?

  Oh, my God, Nathan Lane. I forgot Nathan Lane is in it. I love him. I'm really enjoying my new sitcom Mid-Century Modern starring Nathan Lane.

• 6:52Connor Wood?

  I need to dive in.

• 6:53Brooke Averick?

  You'll hate it.

• 6:54Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 6:55Brooke Averick?

  But it's fabulous.

• 6:56Connor Wood?

  That's great.

• 6:57Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. Sometimes when I'm reading, I'll make notes like, oh, this is a word that I like and would like to use in my book. And the last thing I have up is say instantly instead of suddenly. Okay?

• 7:09Connor Wood?

  That's really good, actually.

• 7:10Brooke Averick?

  You think?

• 7:12Connor Wood?

  Yeah. I think I like instantly.

• 7:15Brooke Averick?

  Let's talk about what's happening tonight, and you can give me some advice.

• 7:18Connor Wood?

  Okay, Brooke and I are doing a little fireside chat tonight.

• 7:23Connor Wood?

  It'll be our first ever live show, and I feel like we're maybe kind of chewing on each other's energy right now. The fact that I think you're a little nervous now. Yeah.

• 7:36Brooke Averick?

  Yes, yes. But not as like completely distraught as I anticipated, which always makes me nervous.

• 7:47Connor Wood?

  That you're not nervous is making you nervous?

• 7:49Brooke Averick?

  No, I am nervous, but I'm not like as bad as I usually am and anticipated that I would be, which makes me nervous.

• 7:57Connor Wood?

  I will say that every time I've done a show and I'm like, I'm so scared I'm gonna kill myself, you're like, you are being a dumbass.

• 8:04Brooke Averick?

  Well, because you do it all the time.

• 8:06Connor Wood?

  I know, but when I take months off, I'm like, how am I gonna go up there? But also...

• 8:11Connor Wood?

  It's gonna be okay. And it's good that you're not nervous.

• 8:14Brooke Averick?

  No, I did not say that.

• 8:16Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh, it's crazy when I pour a little bit of water down my pants while I'm talking and I think that like

• 8:25Connor Wood?

  I'm beginning to release fluids from my body.

• 8:28Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 8:28Connor Wood?

  But it's the opposite, they're entering me.

• 8:30Brooke Averick?

  It's just water.

• 8:31Connor Wood?

  It's water, man. It's gonna be good. I messed up all my timing, if it makes you feel any better. I am here now, I'm in LA.

• 8:40Connor Wood?

  My, I have a wedding this weekend.

• 8:42Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 8:42Connor Wood?

  Listen to this, I have a wedding this weekend.

• 8:46Connor Wood?

  And all of my, my tux and my suit and everything is in storage. And so I have to go to a storage unit, take the, all the boxes out and find my tux and stuff.

• 8:53Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 8:54Connor Wood?

  How am I supposed to get it dry cleaned before Friday? And then get down, do the show, I've, so-

• 8:59Brooke Averick?

  It's Wednesday.

• 9:03Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 9:05Connor Wood?

  That's true.

• 9:05Brooke Averick?

  So, no, I don't think you will be able.

• 9:08Connor Wood?

  I won't be able to.

• 9:09Brooke Averick?

  You might just need to buy a dry cleaned suit.

• 9:12Connor Wood?

  No, you can steam it.

• 9:13Brooke Averick?

  Suits are really expensive, right?

• 9:14Connor Wood?

  Yeah, they're like a thousand dollars.

• 9:16Brooke Averick?

  You're effing with me.

• 9:17Connor Wood?

  No, that's how much tuxes cost, right?

• 9:21Brooke Averick?

  Wow.

• 9:23Connor Wood?

  And I got a tux my senior year of college and it's the same tux. Now, after I went to Italy, I wore the tux to that wedding in Italy. And I, I split my pants like all the time. It's just, it's like, it's like a little bit of investment that I make in having fun at a wedding. I just know that I'm gonna have to pay for a tailor afterwards.

• 9:45Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 9:46Connor Wood?

  After that wedding, I had holes on, on the legs of both of my pants, or both, both legs.

• 9:54Brooke Averick?

  And the, and the knees?

• 9:55Connor Wood?

  It wasn't splits. It was like, as if it fell out of like a golf cart.

• 9:59Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, you might have.

• 10:01Connor Wood?

  It was like rug burn. No, but I was just dancing really hard.

• 10:05Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, you love to dance really hard. Do you want to talk about how you danced really hard last week?

• 10:09Connor Wood?

  What do you mean?

• 10:10Brooke Averick?

  Sally?

• 10:11Connor Wood?

  Oh, oh my gosh, I'm forgetting. Okay, see, my timing's off. Yes. Okay, so, well, just let me, let me go back, back, back.

• 10:19Brooke Averick?

  Go ahead.

• 10:20Connor Wood?

  Let me go back, back, back.

• 10:21Brooke Averick?

  Go ahead.

• 10:22Connor Wood?

  Everyone was mad at me last week because I was calling Fort Worth, Dallas a hundred times. I encourage you to move forward. They're close in distance. Now, we moved forward. Then I went to Houston. I saw Max for a week. We talked then.

• 10:36Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 10:36Connor Wood?

  Saw my parents.

• 10:37Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 10:37Connor Wood?

  That was an insane experience to be at home with my parents for a week. I golfed my off and I played so well.

• 10:46Brooke Averick?

  Wow.

• 10:47Connor Wood?

  I'm just going through my whole experience at home. I'm back into golf. Luckily, there's not a single golf course in New York City, I don't think. So I won't be golfing further.

• 10:55Brooke Averick?

  Well, is there something similar to golf?

• 10:59Connor Wood?

  Like putt-putt, I guess?

• 11:00Brooke Averick?

  Like, is there another sport that requires the motion of swinging something downward?

• 11:08Connor Wood?

  Croquet?

• 11:09Brooke Averick?

  You could start doing that. Or cricket.

• 11:12Connor Wood?

  I don't think there's cricket.

• 11:13Brooke Averick?

  What's cricket?

• 11:14Connor Wood?

  Cricket is, um, baseball. But like, really British.

• 11:18Brooke Averick?

  So, do you just start in croquet?

• 11:21Connor Wood?

  Croquet is like, is like...

• 11:24Connor Wood?

  Croquet is like Prince Harry baseball.

• 11:28Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, no, it's, it's very British. But, oh, you could do backgammon.

• 11:32Connor Wood?

  I would rather jump off a bridge than do backgammon.

• 11:35Brooke Averick?

  Are you serious?

• 11:35Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I'm serious.

• 11:36Brooke Averick?

  Backgammon is a fabulous game. I learned it late in life.

• 11:40Connor Wood?

  How'd you go from golf to backgammon?

• 11:44Brooke Averick?

  I don't know.

• 11:45Connor Wood?

  I don't know either, sis. Hey, okay, listen. So then I went... Then I went and I, so I left Texas. I didn't leave Texas, liar. I went to San Antonio for the Final Four basketball game. I bet money this weekend.

• 11:59Brooke Averick?

  How much did you bet?

• 12:01Connor Wood?

  I bet, and please gird your loins, this is a lot, but I was feeling really confident because I just asked who I should bet on.

• 12:10Connor Wood?

  So I-

• 12:10Brooke Averick?

  Who did you ask? Was it, did you inside trade?

• 12:14Connor Wood?

  My bookie. No, I didn't ask a player. And like, they don't know who's gonna win. You can't, can you inside trade when you're sports betting?

• 12:23Brooke Averick?

  I don't know.

• 12:24Connor Wood?

  Like unless you're gonna Tonya Harding someone in the parking lot, you're not gonna know who's gonna win.

• 12:29Brooke Averick?

  I mean, I guess there's like oddsmakers.

• 12:32Connor Wood?

  There's oddsmakers.

• 12:33Brooke Averick?

  Can you consult an oddsmaker?

• 12:35Connor Wood?

  I don't, I'm not familiar with any oddsmakers.

• 12:39Brooke Averick?

  Who's your local oddsmaker and how much did you bet?

• 12:42Connor Wood?

  I don't have an oddsmaker. I don't know, is there an odd, what is an oddsmaker?

• 12:46Brooke Averick?

  The new Hunger Games book had an oddsmaker.

• 12:47Connor Wood?

  Well, that's a-

• 12:48Brooke Averick?

  What is it called? Oddsmaker?

• 12:50Connor Wood?

  It sounds like there's a cat in the hat and then there's the oddsmaker that lives under the bridge and I gotta go consult with the oddsmaker to go.

• 12:57Brooke Averick?

  Where did the cat in the hat come from?

• 12:58Connor Wood?

  I'm thinking of, not cat in the hat, I'm thinking of...

• 13:03Connor Wood?

  It's like an oddsmaker. Oh, Hunger Games. Like you said.

• 13:09Brooke Averick?

  No, you didn't read the new book, baby.

• 13:11Connor Wood?

  Like Narnia. I know, they had an oddsmaker in the old books.

• 13:15Brooke Averick?

  Not like what's happened in this one.

• 13:16Connor Wood?

  Okay, a different kind of oddsmaker, my bad. It's a fictional book.

• 13:20Brooke Averick?

  How much did you bet?

• 13:21Connor Wood?

  So... I have a bookie, that's what they call it.

• 13:25Brooke Averick?

  What's a bookie?

• 13:26Connor Wood?

  He is a bookkeeper, but they call him a bookie. Isn't that fun?

• 13:30Brooke Averick?

  But what is a bookkeeper?

• 13:31Connor Wood?

  A bookkeeper is someone that places your bets for you. How? I don't know, but black market?

• 13:39Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 13:40Connor Wood?

  I don't know how, I don't know how you place bets. Also, is this illegal to do here in California?

• 13:48Connor Wood?

  Okay, well, I wasn't in California when I did it anyways. I was in Texas where it's definitely illegal.

• 13:52Brooke Averick?

  And you didn't know?

• 13:54Connor Wood?

  I didn't know.

• 13:55Brooke Averick?

  Just like the way I don't know what date in April I have jury duty and it might have passed.

• 14:01Connor Wood?

  Guess what?

• 14:02Brooke Averick?

  But I didn't know.

• 14:03Connor Wood?

  You didn't know? Plead the fifth. What's the fifth, you ask?

• 14:08Brooke Averick?

  I didn't know. The fifth is silence. I'm pleading with, I didn't know.

• 14:14Connor Wood?

  I thought the fifth is, oh my gosh, not us not knowing.

• 14:18Brooke Averick?

  No, pleading the fifth is the right to not perjure yourself.

• 14:22Connor Wood?

  Speak, not to perjure yourself. Invoking the Fifth Amendment of the US Constitution, which protects individuals from being compelled to answer questions that would incriminate them. Nice. To perjure, nice, bro.

• 14:34Brooke Averick?

  Is that what that word means?

• 14:35Connor Wood?

  Perjury?

• 14:36Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I think, but it also could be not what it means, too.

• 14:39Connor Wood?

  I thought.

• 14:40Brooke Averick?

  But I think it does.

• 14:41Connor Wood?

  Perjury.

• 14:42Brooke Averick?

  It's like a little avant garde.

• 14:43Connor Wood?

  Throw up after you eat.

• 14:47Brooke Averick?

  That's, yeah, that is perjuring.

• 14:49Connor Wood?

  Oh, okay. Love double entendres.

• 14:52Brooke Averick?

  But you don't like commit perjury when you make yourself throw up.

• 14:55Connor Wood?

  I think you absolutely do commit perjury when you're in the toilet head first.

• 14:58Brooke Averick?

  Perjury is incriminating. Izzy, can you look up perjury? I think perjury is incriminating yourself.

• 15:03Connor Wood?

  I'm in the bathroom committing perjury. Right on Sunday morning, I'm committing perjury.

• 15:08Brooke Averick?

  Perjury.

• 15:10Connor Wood?

  The offensive willingly telling an untrue.

• 15:12Brooke Averick?

  Perjury is different than what I had claimed. It's like. Perjury is willfully lying. That's what I meant.

• 15:16Connor Wood?

  Under oath, yeah. Okay.

• 15:17Brooke Averick?

  That, yeah, that's close.

• 15:20Connor Wood?

  Yeah, you were close.

• 15:22Brooke Averick?

  But that only counts in horseshoes, which you could play.

• 15:25Connor Wood?

  Right, okay, and which reminds me, how much did I bet? Um, me committing perjury live on pod. Um, I bet $500.

• 15:37Brooke Averick?

  That's how much I bet on blackjack.

• 15:38Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 15:39Brooke Averick?

  Lost every penny.

• 15:40Connor Wood?

  I bet that three times, though. Yes, but.

• 15:43Brooke Averick?

  Oh, you got the bug.

• 15:45Connor Wood?

  No, I did it all at once, like before knowing, because, because.

• 15:48Brooke Averick?

  So you bet $1500.

• 15:50Connor Wood?

  Because my odds maker.

• 15:51Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 15:52Connor Wood?

  Was like, you should absolutely do the no brainer one, which is Florida winning. Um, which they won the championship, so they won the whole thing. But Florida winning and then, um, Duke beating UH, University of Houston, which everyone was on, jumping my bones about. Listen.

• 16:11Brooke Averick?

  Everyone does that.

• 16:13Connor Wood?

  I don't know, I don't get it. But, and then a parlay of both, which is like Florida winning and Duke winning. You, that's, that's one here, it's both, and then I bet individually on both the games. Lost two out of three, but I won the Florida one.

• 16:27Brooke Averick?

  So did you get just your 500 back?

• 16:29Connor Wood?

  Basically even. Like, I didn't lose any money.

• 16:32Brooke Averick?

  Oh, really?

• 16:32Connor Wood?

  Yep.

• 16:33Brooke Averick?

  Okay, congratulations on keeping, keeping your money.

• 16:37Connor Wood?

  Yeah, okay, moments that felt like Goofy's yell.

• 16:41Connor Wood?

  What is this? What is it?

• 16:43Brooke Averick?

  That, something like that.

• 16:48Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, something like that.

• 16:51Connor Wood?

  Moments that felt like Goofy's yell.

• 16:52Brooke Averick?

  That was hysterical.

• 16:54Connor Wood?

  I'm in love with that trend.

• 16:56Brooke Averick?

  You should, what would yours be?

• 16:57Connor Wood?

  Moments that felt like Goofy's yell?

• 16:59Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 17:05Connor Wood?

  Moments that felt like Goofy's yell, maybe like when I get up to go to the bathroom right when the check comes. And like, I don't have to pay for anything at the, at dinner.

• 17:13Brooke Averick?

  Okay. I'm trying to think of my moments that feel like Goofy's yell.

• 17:18Connor Wood?

  Maybe, maybe when I'm committing perjury in, in the bathroom.

• 17:23Brooke Averick?

  Can you come back to me?

• 17:24Connor Wood?

  Yeah, just think of like, anytime you've.

• 17:27Brooke Averick?

  Nothing more humiliating than having to say, can you come back to me? In school when a teacher cold calls you.

• 17:34Connor Wood?

  I didn't, was never able to say that, like, I don't know, us, us.

• 17:39Connor Wood?

  Do you know that there's one time? That I still remember from one of my grades where a teacher called me and I think it was the only time. And they're like, what kind of graph is that? And I was like, that's a bar graph. And she was like, that is a bar graph. And it was just a picture of a bar graph. And I was like, I know what type of graph that is.

• 17:53Brooke Averick?

  Do you know one time? These two kids in like second grade were whispering.

• 17:58Connor Wood?

  No.

• 17:59Brooke Averick?

  To each other in science class. And Mr. Grove made them get up and hold hands in front of the whole class. Cause he was like, if you two are so in love.

• 18:11Brooke Averick?

  Here you go. How horrible is that? I'm just, I just, that just popped into my memory.

• 18:18Connor Wood?

  Whispering, so get up and hold hands?

• 18:19Brooke Averick?

  Nothing's in each other's ears. We were like six and they were like, just talking. They were literally just like, probably had a crush on each other, like, just talking. And then he made them get up and hold hands.

• 18:31Brooke Averick?

  That is like horrible.

• 18:32Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that's committing.

• 18:33Brooke Averick?

  Well, he was like one of those like old, old teachers. It's like it's it's a new time. Like, we're not doing like, we're not humiliating kids anymore. You know?

• 18:44Connor Wood?

  Oh, now it's a new time.

• 18:46Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, like he wasn't like up to date on like, it's like 2002.

• 18:49Connor Wood?

  Do you think you could go back to school right now, like tomorrow and be a teacher again? Like, would you like be able to get back into it?

• 18:56Brooke Averick?

  Don't like every the few times I've come across a child. I've struggled. In a way that makes me sad. Cause it used to come so naturally. It used to be no different than talking to just like one of my best friends.

• 19:09Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 19:10Brooke Averick?

  And now I'm just like, how old are you?

• 19:14Connor Wood?

  How old are you? How many fingers do I have up right now?

• 19:19Brooke Averick?

  But yeah, no, it's tough. But I I hope that it would be like riding a bike, like it'd take a second, but get right back into it once I grease those wheels up. Thank you.

• 19:26Connor Wood?

  I don't think that I I think that I could teach. I think that I could be like a fun history teacher.

• 19:33Connor Wood?

  Period.

• 19:34Brooke Averick?

  Period on God facts.

• 19:35Connor Wood?

  Yeah, because the history teacher.

• 19:36Brooke Averick?

  You could do teach about um. The Alamo.

• 19:40Connor Wood?

  I went to the Alamo. Oh, my God. Sorry. So I bet on the games and I was in San I was in San Antonio for the final four. And it was like the coolest thing ever. I was with Wendy's. I posted about. Nonstop about Wendy's. They were so fun.

• 19:53Brooke Averick?

  I love I've always Wendy's burgers have always been my favorite.

• 19:56Connor Wood?

  Road road trip, I'm going to Wendy's every single time. Not an ad anymore. But. So fun. I looked like an absolute athlete in all those videos.

• 20:06Brooke Averick?

  Wait, that really was such a good ad.

• 20:08Connor Wood?

  It was so good.

• 20:09Brooke Averick?

  Did they film that?

• 20:10Connor Wood?

  They filmed it and edited it. Yeah, which was really cool. Um, it's it's just like set the bar so high. I'm like, how am I supposed to move forward? With anything else now, but um. Then I had an inbound from a close friend Tucker. Aka role model.

• 20:27Brooke Averick?

  A model.

• 20:28Connor Wood?

  Role model. And this was a while back. Actually, it was from Carolina, our friend. Who works on his team. And they're like, could you do any of these shows? And I was like, my only day that I could technically make it somewhere that I don't have tour, like I'm not on tour as well is Seattle. My sister's a big fan. We flew up to Seattle, got in, and I went out as Sally. The whole day, I'm like, what am I gonna do onstage? I'm texting Grace O'Malley. She's like, I tripped.

• 20:55Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 20:56Connor Wood?

  She was like, gonna go out and like, chug a beer with him.

• 21:00Connor Wood?

  And I was like, I'll do that. Cause that's easy, low lift. And then I thought about it and I was like, no, I wanna chuck some ass. So I texted-

• 21:08Brooke Averick?

  Chuck some ass?

• 21:09Connor Wood?

  Chuck some ass.

• 21:10Brooke Averick?

  Nice.

• 21:11Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I wanna beer luge out of Tucker's crack. I, I go up-

• 21:16Brooke Averick?

  Do you call him Tucker to his face?

• 21:20Connor Wood?

  Tucker said, who's the most unserious Sally we can get and found Connor Wood.

• 21:23Brooke Averick?

  Wow, look how many people liked that.

• 21:25Connor Wood?

  Oh wow. Oh my gosh. See, okay, and everyone was saying like, it was all over our FYP and I was like, wow, why? Like, I'm the biggest narcissist in the world. How come it didn't come across my FYP?

• 21:36Brooke Averick?

  That is crazy that you can move your body like that.

• 21:38Connor Wood?

  What was crazier is like-

• 21:41Brooke Averick?

  I like that. I liked that. What do you call that one?

• 21:43Connor Wood?

  It was just a long time on the stage. Like, I had already done like, every other dance. So all you can, if you look at-

• 21:49Brooke Averick?

  Nice.

• 21:50Connor Wood?

  If you look at any other video with any, anybody else that's on the role model show, like, you do real, like, the song is so jumpy, point at your friends, like, it's such a, like, it's such like a Bob Dylan, like, OG America song, like Sally When the Wine Runs Out, that like, you do wanna like chant it, like, point at your friends-

• 22:08Brooke Averick?

  You wanna chuck ass.

• 22:09Connor Wood?

  And like, jump around, but I was like, okay, I gotta do something a little bit different. Like, Victoria's Justice was, I think, the night before, and then Renee Rapp was the other night.

• 22:17Brooke Averick?

  Oh wow.

• 22:18Connor Wood?

  Dylan Minette was one of the nights.

• 22:19Brooke Averick?

  Oh wow.

• 22:20Connor Wood?

  I was like, okay, the pressure's on. Like, let's really do something. So, I walk around all day.

• 22:26Brooke Averick?

  Has there ever not been a Sally?

• 22:29Connor Wood?

  I think he finds people on the show. Jake was one, I think in LA. He, I think he finds people in the crowd if he doesn't have anyone in town. But- My ass commuted to this cuz I was like, I'm gonna turn, I'm gonna turn it on for this show. And so I'm walking around, I'm like, what can I do? What can I do? I was gonna dress up as Dorothy from Wizard of Oz.

• 22:51Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 22:52Connor Wood?

  Cuz his tour right now is No Place Like Tour.

• 22:54Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 22:55Connor Wood?

  And then I couldn't get, find any ruby red slippers in time.

• 22:57Brooke Averick?

  I have a pair.

• 22:58Connor Wood?

  Shut your ass.

• 22:59Brooke Averick?

  I, like, I'm so serious.

• 23:00Connor Wood?

  Oh my god, you were Dorothy.

• 23:02Brooke Averick?

  I was Dorothy. That being said, I don't know if you would be able to slip into my size sevens.

• 23:06Connor Wood?

  I might have to cut the heel out.

• 23:08Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 23:09Connor Wood?

  But I wouldn't have been able to chuck ass like that.

• 23:11Brooke Averick?

  That's, you could've, you could've chucked the ruby slip.

• 23:13Connor Wood?

  And the ruby slip, yeah.

• 23:14Brooke Averick?

  Off the stage, carefully.

• 23:16Connor Wood?

  Well, so I'm walking around in Seattle, I find a magic shop. And Eric from the magic shop, I owed you one. He listens to the podcast.

• 23:25Brooke Averick?

  You're kidding.

• 23:25Connor Wood?

  No, he did a magic.

• 23:26Brooke Averick?

  I love a magician.

• 23:28Connor Wood?

  He gave me his number, so. Um, but highly recommend the magic shop in the public market. I found it and I was like, I wanna do like, like a, like, like smoke bomb or something. And then I was like, if pressure didn't bring a bomb to a concert.

• 23:42Brooke Averick?

  Sure.

• 23:42Connor Wood?

  So then I was like, I found this bouquet, hidden bouquet. And I was like, I was like, how do I do this? Like, whatever. And it straight up is just like a bouquet and I put it in my sleeve.

• 23:54Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 23:55Connor Wood?

  And I was like, I'm gonna go out and I was gonna give it to him. And then onstage, in the moment, I'm like, okay, I'm gonna give it to him. And I was like, he's like, working. I'm like, I can't give it to him. First, I'm sitting here, so first I like go to take my jacket off cuz it's like, hot, hotter than a fever. And then I'm like, wait, I have my bouquet in my sleeve. So I put the jacket back on, I pulled it out, and then I was like, wait, I should give it to a fan. So then I faked him out and I crawled out.

• 24:22Brooke Averick?

  Oh, put it in your mouth.

• 24:23Connor Wood?

  Gave it to a fan and then jumped back onstage. And then I'm sweating like a, like a pig up there. So I'm like, I gotta lose this jacket. There's when I did the hop.

• 24:31Brooke Averick?

  I like the hop.

• 24:32Connor Wood?

  And everyone's like, I just got, like, I look like Elon Musk when he jumps.

• 24:35Brooke Averick?

  Sure.

• 24:36Connor Wood?

  You know? But everyone was like, I just got the ick. And I was like, I don't know what to tell you. Like, this is, this is like, this is the realest version of myself that I've ever been. Like, that is what I look like. That's what I looked like when I got.

• 24:47Brooke Averick?

  I really like the hop.

• 24:49Connor Wood?

  They, someone needs to edit the hop to.

• 24:54Brooke Averick?

  You know what? That's a moment that felt like.

• 24:57Connor Wood?

  Goofy's, yo! Oh my god, that is. And then he goes, get up onstage. We didn't rehearse at all. So like, I didn't know. When I, like, I watch everybody else's, but I didn't know, like, what do we want to do?

• 25:10Brooke Averick?

  Was like someone pushing you out from the wings?

• 25:11Connor Wood?

  I was watching from side stage the whole time.

• 25:15Connor Wood?

  But I didn't know, like, what do you want me to, like, what do you want me to do? I heard him go at one point, like, shake some ass, like, go do it. And so that's when I went like this.

• 25:24Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 25:27Connor Wood?

  But the stage, he was like, get up on stage, get up on stage. But I was so out of breath from doing my hops all around the stage. All I could do was lay down. So I got up on the stage and I laid down and then I was like, oh, should I leave stage? And I, he was like, yeah, I gotta finish the show.

• 25:39Brooke Averick?

  Oh, yeah.

• 25:40Connor Wood?

  So I just, like, got up and ran. But I like how, I like how he was going to take off his jacket, but then remembered he had a bit to do.

• 25:47Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 25:47Connor Wood?

  Genuinely, in real time, I was like,

• 25:53Connor Wood?

  I need to-

• 25:54Brooke Averick?

  My bouquet.

• 25:54Connor Wood?

  My, my, feeble buffet.

• 25:56Brooke Averick?

  My bouquet.

• 25:57Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I was like, I need to-

• 25:58Brooke Averick?

  That's hysterical. I didn't know, I didn't clock it.

• 26:00Connor Wood?

  The bouquet? I haven't seen any photos, like, the photographer there was going ham, but I haven't seen a single photo. So I need to figure out where those are.

• 26:10Brooke Averick?

  You could always ask Roll M.

• 26:12Connor Wood?

  Roll, I could always ask Tucker, one of my closest friends, Tuck. Um, but he was really awesome. My sister's a huge fan and he was like so nice, like photos, videos, whatever. Um, and the team is really cool. And it was a blast.

• 26:26Brooke Averick?

  Fabulous, Connor.

• 26:27Connor Wood?

  It's always nice to get back to Seattle. I have not left-

• 26:29Brooke Averick?

  I've never been.

• 26:30Connor Wood?

  I haven't left. You would love it, because I went to a cocktail bar before the show. It was a book, book, it's called The Bookstore, coffee shop and bar.

• 26:38Brooke Averick?

  And books, or is there no books?

• 26:40Connor Wood?

  It's all books.

• 26:41Brooke Averick?

  But like, fa, like-

• 26:42Connor Wood?

  No, real.

• 26:43Brooke Averick?

  This room, or like bookstore?

• 26:45Connor Wood?

  You could, it's, you can't buy any of the books, but you can sit there and read them.

• 26:48Brooke Averick?

  But are they, what kind of books are they?

• 26:49Connor Wood?

  I didn't read the books. I was having a espresso martini.

• 26:53Brooke Averick?

  Damn. But like, did it look like these kind of books, or like books that like you would like find on my shelves?

• 26:59Connor Wood?

  No, it didn't have any of the like, new age, like, AI covers type thing. It was like, very this kind of vibe. But it wasn't like ancient scripts, like what we have.

• 27:10Brooke Averick?

  Like, what's the, like, vibe on me bringing my Kindle?

• 27:13Connor Wood?

  Yeah, you're totally good. There's a whole half of the restaurant that is like where you sit and you can lounge and stuff.

• 27:18Brooke Averick?

  Wow.

• 27:19Connor Wood?

  But Seattle, I have not left, like, the absolute tourist central, because it's always like I'm there for like a day and a half.

• 27:27Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I would love to go.

• 27:29Connor Wood?

  I eat some fresh fish just out of a trough.

• 27:31Brooke Averick?

  My stepbrother lives there, actually. I just got, I got nervous for tonight. I have a piece of throw up in my throat.

• 27:36Connor Wood?

  Do you want to cough it out, or do you want to leave it where it is?

• 27:38Brooke Averick?

  No, I'll just keep it.

• 27:40Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 27:40Brooke Averick?

  Save it for a rainy day.

• 27:42Connor Wood?

  Do you want maybe a sip of water?

• 27:45Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 27:47Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I'll have a sip of water.

• 27:48Connor Wood?

  Um, speaking of your throat in your mouth, I'm back into eggs. I told you guys last week, but I found the best way to make eggs. No one's gonna care at all, but maybe on the off chance that maybe someone does care a little bit about the way I make eggs now.

• 28:01Brooke Averick?

  Oh my god, my YSL lip shine sparkle gloss.

• 28:05Connor Wood?

  Yeah, well, with a huge plumping, comfortable.

• 28:08Brooke Averick?

  Wand plush.

• 28:09Connor Wood?

  Wand. Something about a plumper wand is doing. Do my lips look bigger from the YSL beauty?

• 28:14Brooke Averick?

  It's not a plumper in that way.

• 28:17Connor Wood?

  Oh.

• 28:17Brooke Averick?

  You know what I mean?

• 28:18Connor Wood?

  No.

• 28:18Brooke Averick?

  Okay. There's like actual like lip plumpers that like make your lips tingle and hurt and like puff them out.

• 28:24Connor Wood?

  I like the way it tingles and hurts.

• 28:25Brooke Averick?

  Those are like the science ones. This isn't like a science-based plump.

• 28:29Connor Wood?

  Science? You're putting science in your plumper?

• 28:32Brooke Averick?

  That is like, there's like a chemical that is working over time to plump. Like this doesn't have that specific.

• 28:37Connor Wood?

  It has spicy ginger.

• 28:38Brooke Averick?

  It is, but yeah.

• 28:39Connor Wood?

  This whole episode is like subtle ads and then none of them are real.

• 28:44Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 28:45Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 28:45Brooke Averick?

  That's good.

• 28:48Connor Wood?

  I want to just flag really quickly something that absolutely does not matter, but also does matter. And I saw that they talked about this on the toast.

• 28:55Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 28:56Connor Wood?

  Katy Perry is going to space in one week.

• 29:01Brooke Averick?

  I'm worried for her.

• 29:03Connor Wood?

  Like, God forbid.

• 29:05Brooke Averick?

  I'm worried for her.

• 29:06Connor Wood?

  And that's all I'll say is God forbid, but like it would make sense.

• 29:10Brooke Averick?

  Why?

• 29:10Connor Wood?

  The most like insane thing.

• 29:12Brooke Averick?

  That would be horrible. I don't want, like, that's horrible.

• 29:14Connor Wood?

  Yeah, it's horrible. I know, but like.

• 29:16Brooke Averick?

  Why would you?

• 29:17Connor Wood?

  Why would you?

• 29:18Brooke Averick?

  Why would you? What is, I wonder what her reasoning is.

• 29:21Connor Wood?

  She's trying to promote that album, I think.

• 29:24Brooke Averick?

  But there's in, there are other ways.

• 29:26Connor Wood?

  You could.

• 29:27Brooke Averick?

  There's gotta be another way.

• 29:28Connor Wood?

  You could stay on earth.

• 29:30Brooke Averick?

  There's gotta be another way.

• 29:31Connor Wood?

  God forbid that I ever get to a point where it's like, well, I guess I'll go to space.

• 29:36Brooke Averick?

  Do you feel like?

• 29:38Connor Wood?

  That would be, isn't it crazy? My rock bottom would be like, I guess I'll go to space with Jeff Bezos's wife.

• 29:44Brooke Averick?

  You are someone who like. Like, um, wants to be in the public eye, right? What if you get to a point, no one cares about you?

• 29:56Connor Wood?

  I'm not going to space.

• 29:57Brooke Averick?

  Are you going to space?

• 29:57Connor Wood?

  I can say-

• 29:58Brooke Averick?

  Literally, everyone's like, Connor, who?

• 30:01Connor Wood?

  I could say with my chest, like, an act such as this, this is nothing like Goofy's yell.

• 30:12Brooke Averick?

  Like what?

• 30:12Connor Wood?

  Goofy's yell.

• 30:13Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 30:14Connor Wood?

  To me, this is like, genuinely makes me-

• 30:17Brooke Averick?

  Wow, isn't it crazy that one person's goofy yell is another person's hosier yell?

• 30:22Connor Wood?

  Yeah, no, okay, this is, this is probably like a goofy yell. And hosier's yell for me is staying put here with my feet on the ground.

• 30:28Brooke Averick?

  Would you do Titanic submersible?

• 30:30Connor Wood?

  Fuck no.

• 30:31Brooke Averick?

  What would you rather?

• 30:32Connor Wood?

  Right at sea level is perfect for me.

• 30:35Brooke Averick?

  What would you rather?

• 30:37Connor Wood?

  Submersible or space? Oh my god, I'm like gonna, I feel freaked out.

• 30:41Brooke Averick?

  Space with KDP.

• 30:42Connor Wood?

  Space with KDP or some-

• 30:43Brooke Averick?

  KDP can be there.

• 30:44Connor Wood?

  Who else is in my submersible?

• 30:46Brooke Averick?

  In your submersible, um-

• 30:49Connor Wood?

  Give me like someone, I'm like freak- It's giving me, it's giving me serious panic.

• 30:55Brooke Averick?

  Wait, who's someone that we love? That is not the person that came on yesterday? Who's an additional person that we love?

• 31:03Connor Wood?

  The only person that I would feel comfortable like talking through everything, right?

• 31:06Brooke Averick?

  Okay, no, you're into space with, um, our guest yesterday? Or in the submersible with Matthew Gray-Gubler?

• 31:13Connor Wood?

  Into space with my-

• 31:14Brooke Averick?

  What about, okay-

• 31:15Connor Wood?

  Best friend.

• 31:16Brooke Averick?

  Okay, what about in the submersible with your best friend and in space with Matthew Gray-Gubler?

• 31:21Connor Wood?

  I think, I think I'm doing space over the submersible, yeah. Even though like I'm so scared of flying, god forbid I'm out in the orbit?

• 31:27Brooke Averick?

  That's the worst part.

• 31:28Connor Wood?

  Question mark, the orbit, question mark?

• 31:30Brooke Averick?

  Is like, both have the risk of just like quick like explosion deaths, but in space you also run the risk of getting lost in orbit. Whereas you don't run that risk in space, but you do risk like slow drowning if some-

• 31:44Connor Wood?

  You, you-

• 31:44Brooke Averick?

  No, you would explode.

• 31:45Connor Wood?

  You do run the risk of, of being lost in both cases, like-

• 31:50Brooke Averick?

  No, but you'd die pretty quickly. And C, you would float for until you starve in space unless you decide to take your helmet off.

• 32:00Connor Wood?

  This is giving me like

• 32:01Brooke Averick?

  Whoa.

• 32:02Connor Wood?

  Serious like

• 32:03Brooke Averick?

  Like goofy screaming. Goofy's like shouting in your ear.

• 32:06Connor Wood?

  Horror scream.

• 32:08Brooke Averick?

  Goofy shrill horror movie scream.

• 32:10Connor Wood?

  Yeah, yeah goofy absolutely clawing at a window, but of a submersible. Okay, to space with goofy's yell or to the submersible with hosers yell.

• 32:24Brooke Averick?

  I think I would do space always over submersible just due to what happened with the submersible and the fact that space feels less claustrophobic.

• 32:35Connor Wood?

  At least for space, you're like, you can, there's a view.

• 32:38Brooke Averick?

  I'm not getting out of the spaceship and I'm not looking out the window.

• 32:40Connor Wood?

  Oh, I'm, I'm taking one large sleeping pill and then I'm gonna, I'm gonna go to sleep on takeoff and I'm gonna wake up when we land in the ocean.

• 32:47Brooke Averick?

  How long? How, what's the ETA?

• 32:50Connor Wood?

  Long. Can we, can we see what they're doing up there? All I know about this is that she's, she said, she said, we're bringing, we're putting the ass in astronaut. That was her big headline.

• 33:00Brooke Averick?

  Nice. That wasn't my understanding.

• 33:05Brooke Averick?

  Can I be honest about what I would have said?

• 33:08Connor Wood?

  A year?

• 33:08Brooke Averick?

  Two weeks.

• 33:09Connor Wood?

  Oh, I, I was thinking at least.

• 33:11Brooke Averick?

  Can I be honest? Wait, you can go to space in 11 minutes. Space, back in 11 minutes?

• 33:18Connor Wood?

  The whole thing, where is space? Like, why did I think?

• 33:22Connor Wood?

  Hang on, where is space? Because by the way, you can't get anywhere in 11 minutes.

• 33:27Brooke Averick?

  Is she just going like a little bit above where an airplane would go?

• 33:30Connor Wood?

  Go down. Like, I, I took an elevator today in my hotel and it took 12 minutes.

• 33:36Brooke Averick?

  Wait.

• 33:36Connor Wood?

  It was five floors.

• 33:37Brooke Averick?

  Where is she heading? In, in this, she's just going to the stratosphere.

• 33:45Connor Wood?

  So.

• 33:45Brooke Averick?

  62 miles above earth with, yeah.

• 33:48Connor Wood?

  With Gayle King.

• 33:50Brooke Averick?

  Okay. How long would it take to get to, let's say, Mars?

• 33:56Brooke Averick?

  Because this is where I was thinking 11 days.

• 33:59Connor Wood?

  Oh, Mars is gonna be like 50, 60 years, I think. Two to three years also, by the way. What if it was like 16 minutes? Hey, question, where is everything?

• 34:12Brooke Averick?

  Understand.

• 34:13Connor Wood?

  I don't even know, where's Georgia?

• 34:14Brooke Averick?

  Oh. Oh, what's happening?

• 34:17Connor Wood?

  Not Mars being closer than if you were to drive.

• 34:19Brooke Averick?

  What's the closest planet to Earth? But you can't, you couldn't go there. So what, Mars is the only, like, some are just burning up.

• 34:29Brooke Averick?

  Or too hot.

• 34:29Connor Wood?

  This is like not for us. Like, this is not, this is not a conversation we even need to touch. Like, I don't know, I'm being so honest. If you gave me a map. Like Mars is.

• 34:41Brooke Averick?

  My understanding was Katy Perry was putting a flag on Mars. That was my understanding.

• 34:50Connor Wood?

  Katy is gonna be gone for three years.

• 34:51Brooke Averick?

  Katy's going 11 minutes total.

• 34:59Connor Wood?

  Okay. Wow.

• 35:02Brooke Averick?

  Whoa.

• 35:04Brooke Averick?

  This just goes to show you that sometimes your understanding isn't what's happening.

• 35:07Connor Wood?

  This is Katy's like afternoon, she could do something after.

• 35:10Brooke Averick?

  This is, like, she could just have her afternoon coffee and on the flight and that's it.

• 35:16Connor Wood?

  She could wake up, go to the ALO gym. She could go to Space with Gayle King. Put the ass in astronaut, come back and go to lunch at.

• 35:26Brooke Averick?

  The Beverly Hills Hotel.

• 35:27Connor Wood?

  Beverly Hills Hotel.

• 35:28Brooke Averick?

  Wow.

• 35:29Connor Wood?

  And then she could.

• 35:31Brooke Averick?

  So, okay, she's going 65 miles above the Earth. How, what is the highest the plane goes? Good question.

• 35:38Connor Wood?

  Three miles, I think, right?

• 35:40Brooke Averick?

  Three miles?

• 35:41Connor Wood?

  Is it one mile?

• 35:43Brooke Averick?

  I don't know how miles.

• 35:44Connor Wood?

  It's 10,000 feet. 42,000.

• 35:46Brooke Averick?

  She's not going that much above a plane.

• 35:52Brooke Averick?

  Whoa, private jets can go higher. I'm not, I wouldn't be comfortable with that.

• 35:56Connor Wood?

  What is 42,000 feet in miles?

• 36:02Brooke Averick?

  Why does it matter?

• 36:04Connor Wood?

  Seven miles.

• 36:05Brooke Averick?

  You could run.

• 36:08Connor Wood?

  Brooke, you could run.

• 36:09Brooke Averick?

  You could run up.

• 36:10Connor Wood?

  You could run up. If you could run up, I could run that. I have run that.

• 36:14Brooke Averick?

  Wow.

• 36:15Connor Wood?

  I could run up to a plane where they're flying.

• 36:17Brooke Averick?

  You could run up to outer space.

• 36:20Connor Wood?

  No.

• 36:21Brooke Averick?

  How many miles is fifty?

• 36:24Brooke Averick?

  Sixty five?

• 36:24Connor Wood?

  Sixty five miles is what they said. That's how far it is. Sixty five miles.

• 36:29Brooke Averick?

  Oh, was it?

• 36:30Connor Wood?

  Sixty five.

• 36:32Brooke Averick?

  No, it was feet, something about feet.

• 36:35Brooke Averick?

  I'm sorry.

• 36:36Connor Wood?

  I've actually never run in my life thirty to thirty to hundred twenty thousand miles.

• 36:41Brooke Averick?

  We're getting our units confused.

• 36:44Brooke Averick?

  We're getting our units confused. I think we should move on.

• 36:48Connor Wood?

  Okay, like, one, one unit of measurement, I do understand, she's gonna be up for twelve minutes.

• 36:52Brooke Averick?

  This is, can I be honest? This is starting to get to the point where long division was introduced in third grade, and I started to get my first headache.

• 37:00Connor Wood?

  Okay, the thing is, like, now it doesn't matter, like, all I needed to know is that her ass is gonna be up there under an hour, under half an hour.

• 37:07Brooke Averick?

  You know that TikTok trend that's like, you have thirty, like, thirty minutes, thirty minutes?

• 37:10Connor Wood?

  You know you have thirty minutes.

• 37:11Brooke Averick?

  She doesn't even have that.

• 37:12Connor Wood?

  You know you have twelve minutes, like, soak it in, baby. She's gonna get... I'm just telling you guys now, this is gonna be the most liked photo on Instagram.

• 37:20Brooke Averick?

  It's gonna be the most memed moment.

• 37:23Connor Wood?

  It's just like, there is no one, no one

• 37:29Connor Wood?

  that makes more sense to be going to space, no, makes more sense to me to be going to space than Katy Perry.

• 37:34Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 37:36Connor Wood?

  The fact that she's gonna be plummeting back past the stratosphere into the ocean, like, with Gayle King.

• 37:41Brooke Averick?

  She's plummeting back into the ocean?

• 37:44Connor Wood?

  They don't just land, it's not a flight, they're, they're plummeting, yeah, they're landing.

• 37:48Brooke Averick?

  What do you mean they're plummeting into the ocean?

• 37:50Connor Wood?

  That's how, that's how rockets come back to Earth, they, they plummet into the ocean.

• 37:56Brooke Averick?

  Oh?

• 37:57Connor Wood?

  So sorry, can I say one thing that I think would be so funny? God forbid.

• 38:00Brooke Averick?

  You may.

• 38:02Connor Wood?

  You know, those astronauts that just were accident-

• 38:04Brooke Averick?

  Large parachute for gentle touchdown.

• 38:06Connor Wood?

  Yeah, but they plummet, they come in, they break the-

• 38:09Brooke Averick?

  Wow, I know nothing about space, believe it or not.

• 38:11Connor Wood?

  Speed of something, and then they plop out a freaking, what's it Dewey? Sounds like goofy yell up there in that strato. And then they- Oh! It's Katy Perry hitting a note. Like, the Chronicles of Katy up there, like, if she started a journal and she got stuck in space, like those astronauts that just came back after a year and they were only supposed to be up there for two weeks. Like Katy Perry, Lauren Sanchez, Gayle King, and then I think there's a civil rights activist that's also going up with them that like, that's cool to me, and Gayle King and the civil rights activist is cool. Lauren Sanchez, pretty cool too. Katy Perry is ruining it for all of them with the stuff she's saying.

• 38:54Connor Wood?

  She's like, we're going up in full glam, there's gonna be fake eyelashes flying around the thing, and the civil rights activist is like, I'm gonna go up and lipstick, I'm a woman, like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna put the ass in astronaut, that's good. But Katy Perry is just like, embarrassing to go up with.

• 39:11Brooke Averick?

  Are you saying that you want her to stay up there for a year?

• 39:15Connor Wood?

  I just think that that would-

• 39:16Brooke Averick?

  She can't, they're not getting off.

• 39:19Connor Wood?

  They're going up for 12 minutes, they don't have time to get off.

• 39:20Brooke Averick?

  11.

• 39:22Connor Wood?

  Sorry, they have even less than I thought, but there's nowhere to get off.

• 39:26Brooke Averick?

  That's what I'm saying.

• 39:27Connor Wood?

  So they're, so they're go, how long does it, so is that the total flight? Or is it 12 minutes to get up, 12 minutes to get down?

• 39:32Brooke Averick?

  Total, and it's 11.

• 39:34Connor Wood?

  That is a, that is a genuine ride at the county fair.

• 39:39Brooke Averick?

  Imagine my shock that they're not going to a planet.

• 39:44Connor Wood?

  There is nowhere to go. I guess they could go to the moon. I don't, wow, Katy Perry on the moon.

• 39:51Brooke Averick?

  Oh, wait, that, how long does it take to get to the moon? I think that's what I've been thinking of this whole time.

• 39:56Connor Wood?

  When you were like, what's the closest planet? I was like, no, because I was like, I guess Mars.

• 40:00Brooke Averick?

  When I said Mars, I was-

• 40:02Connor Wood?

  You were thinking of Walson Gromit? About three days.

• 40:04Brooke Averick?

  That's what I was thinking of when I said two weeks.

• 40:08Connor Wood?

  God forbid, I'm in a rocket for three days.

• 40:10Brooke Averick?

  Mars is like a more, we have not sent, really, just anyone.

• 40:14Connor Wood?

  We sent a robot, and that robot passed.

• 40:16Brooke Averick?

  Just the Mars rover to Mars.

• 40:18Connor Wood?

  Nice, bro.

• 40:18Brooke Averick?

  Thank you.

• 40:21Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:21Brooke Averick?

  And we have sent a man on the moon.

• 40:24Connor Wood?

  Yeah. We have.

• 40:26Brooke Averick?

  Can I say?

• 40:27Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:27Brooke Averick?

  This is something that came up a few episodes ago.

• 40:29Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:30Brooke Averick?

  When you said.

• 40:32Connor Wood?

  Yes, I went to sleep and I was, I know what you're gonna say.

• 40:34Brooke Averick?

  I get them confused.

• 40:37Connor Wood?

  I said.

• 40:37Brooke Averick?

  Neil Armstrong went to the moon.

• 40:39Connor Wood?

  Armstrong went to the moon. Louis Armstrong played a mean sax.

• 40:41Brooke Averick?

  That's correct.

• 40:41Connor Wood?

  Yes, and I.

• 40:42Brooke Averick?

  Who?

• 40:42Connor Wood?

  When I walked away, I was like, because the whole episode, I was like.

• 40:45Brooke Averick?

  But who's the Liv Strong bracelet?

• 40:47Connor Wood?

  Lance.

• 40:48Brooke Averick?

  Armstrong.

• 40:49Connor Wood?

  Armstrong.

• 40:50Brooke Averick?

  So there's Lance Armstrong, Louis Armstrong. Neil Armstrong went to the moon.

• 40:55Connor Wood?

  Yep, and you know what? What a perfect name for all three of those young men.

• 40:59Brooke Averick?

  Armstrong.

• 41:00Connor Wood?

  Armstrong, like that, like, there must be something in the water.

• 41:02Brooke Averick?

  Understood. That Liv Strong is a play on words. Thank you.

• 41:08Connor Wood?

  Liv Strong.

• 41:09Brooke Averick?

  How many Liv Strong bracelets did you have?

• 41:10Connor Wood?

  A hundred, because my dad bought them in bulk. And I think he still has some.

• 41:14Brooke Averick?

  I had about 50 on my each ankle.

• 41:16Connor Wood?

  My, my yellow wristband, I had 10. I had 10.

• 41:19Brooke Averick?

  Well, I went, no, I went beyond just every color Liv Strong. I mean, there was like, they said everything known to man. Peace signs, like truly, like truly. Anything you can put on a piece of rubber.

• 41:32Connor Wood?

  Sign me up.

• 41:33Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 41:33Connor Wood?

  I wonder what the environment, like a carbon footprint of us just needing silly bands had like long term on the planet.

• 41:40Brooke Averick?

  Can I ask you an honest question?

• 41:42Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 41:43Brooke Averick?

  Do you think that was the dumbest we've ever sounded, or has there been worse?

• 41:45Connor Wood?

  No, there's way worse, way worse than that. Yeah. Also, like, we didn't sound dumb. Who the hell was supposed to know that it takes 12 minutes to get to the out, outer skirts of the, the atmosphere? Not me.

• 41:59Brooke Averick?

  Not me, obviously.

• 42:00Connor Wood?

  That's not our job. When people are like, you didn't know that? No, why would I know that?

• 42:05Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, that's true.

• 42:07Connor Wood?

  I didn't go to school for that. Also, I have to make real estate in my brain for other stuff now. Like, that's not a, a key fact that I need to keep. You know, like when SpongeBob's, let me bring up SpongeBob.

• 42:25Connor Wood?

  Now it is the dumbest we've ever sounded. Ooh SpongeBob what?

• 42:33Brooke Averick?

  SpongeBob what?

• 42:37Brooke Averick?

  I love, and I love how impassioned you were just then.

• 42:39Connor Wood?

  All I know is fine dining and breathing. Because he's cleared out because he wanted to do really good at his job. He wanted to do real good at his job.

• 42:48Brooke Averick?

  Was this the episode where there were hundreds of little SpongeBubs in his head in the filing cabinet?

• 42:52Connor Wood?

  Running around, he's like, what's the name, what's the name? It's like, genuinely, I have that. When I see someone in person that I've met several times, maybe at a Trader Joe's or something, and they go, hey, oh my gosh, when have you seen you? I'm in my head, hundreds of little Connors. What's the name, what's the name? And all I'm, all I know is dried mango and sparkling water at that point. All I know is my grocery list. Wow, though.

• 43:18Brooke Averick?

  Wow, though.

• 43:18Connor Wood?

  But like, that's the best reference that I had. In that moment.

• 43:22Brooke Averick?

  Let's just hope no one gets a hold of the footage that we're about to publish as a podcast.

• 43:29Connor Wood?

  This one?

• 43:30Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 43:31Connor Wood?

  Yeah, god forbid.

• 43:32Brooke Averick?

  Let's just hope it doesn't fall into the wrong hands.

• 43:37Connor Wood?

  I know KDP's gonna see it.

• 43:40Brooke Averick?

  Lord help me, I know this is gonna be on like a dumb influencer montage.

• 43:45Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that's, I'm okay with that. Because we have allies too, the people that are, I promise you, a large percentage of people watching like doesn't, don't know that it takes.

• 43:58Brooke Averick?

  Let me know if you also thought Katie was going to Mars, thank you.

• 44:02Connor Wood?

  Okay, no one, like, I do not think that that's something people thought, like.

• 44:08Connor Wood?

  No, she never said she was going to Mars.

• 44:10Brooke Averick?

  To me?

• 44:12Connor Wood?

  She better, she better play. You're so hypnotizing. Hit me, oh, that's a Kanye West song.

• 44:19Brooke Averick?

  I bet that's why she's going.

• 44:21Connor Wood?

  To, to re-promote the re-release of ET?

• 44:26Brooke Averick?

  Just because like she made some extra treasure on her brand. Do you know what I mean? It's part of her brand.

• 44:36Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 44:37Brooke Averick?

  Go ahead and say that word fast for me when you're already talking.

• 44:40Connor Wood?

  Oh, I was gonna tell you something about an extra. Okay, I can't.

• 44:43Brooke Averick?

  Put it in. Exactly, exactly, exactly.

• 44:46Connor Wood?

  Woo, I'm sweating a little bit. Wow.

• 44:49Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 44:50Connor Wood?

  My heart rate's up.

• 44:52Brooke Averick?

  You're good. You're good.

• 44:56Brooke Averick?

  Should we move on from space?

• 44:57Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I have. Well, I can't talk about this anymore.

• 44:59Brooke Averick?

  This is the space episode.

• 45:00Connor Wood?

  Hmm. Um, I, do you think that it's kosher for me to reach out to the person that moved into my apartment so I can see how they decorated it? While I'm here in town?

• 45:10Brooke Averick?

  Did you like follow each other on Instagram?

• 45:12Connor Wood?

  They follow me. For sure, because.

• 45:15Brooke Averick?

  Oh, you wanna go over? I thought you were asking for pictures.

• 45:18Connor Wood?

  I wanna go over.

• 45:19Brooke Averick?

  I think you could walk by. And maybe like the back doors will be open.

• 45:23Connor Wood?

  They texted me today because they watched my Instagram story and they're like, you're back in town.

• 45:27Brooke Averick?

  Oh, Ethan, yeah.

• 45:28Connor Wood?

  Because they, they make prints. Much like Papa. On Etsy, he makes small prints to sell. Um, he's an artist, freelancer. They make prints and they were like, oh, because I, I left them a lot of stuff that like they were from the fires and they were like moving in and they like didn't have anything left. So I was like, oh, I got an extra vacuum. Dining chair, dining table, all this stuff. And they're like, we wanna give you a print. I wanna see the prints.

• 45:58Brooke Averick?

  So say, hey, I'll be walking or I'll be taking a walk around there today. Can I scoop?

• 46:05Connor Wood?

  Can I pop in?

• 46:06Brooke Averick?

  Scoop a print? Or can I?

• 46:07Connor Wood?

  Can I scoop a print from y'all?

• 46:09Brooke Averick?

  Or can I pop? Can I pop or can I scoop?

• 46:12Connor Wood?

  Can I pop or can I scoop?

• 46:14Brooke Averick?

  If you're in, have a texting relationship?

• 46:15Connor Wood?

  Yeah, we have a texting relationship.

• 46:16Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 46:17Connor Wood?

  I haven't gotten my security deposit back yet.

• 46:20Brooke Averick?

  You should follow up.

• 46:21Connor Wood?

  I did.

• 46:21Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 46:23Connor Wood?

  I did, twice. Um, looking forward to that. But TBD, huge TBD. It made me really, um, I don't think I'll ever be happy.

• 46:35Brooke Averick?

  Why?

• 46:36Connor Wood?

  Because I have so many memories and they all make me sad.

• 46:41Brooke Averick?

  Nostalgia is sad, is sad a lot of times. Are you saying the memories are happy, but they make you sad because they're gone?

• 46:49Connor Wood?

  Yes.

• 46:50Brooke Averick?

  I totally understand that.

• 46:52Connor Wood?

  Yes.

• 46:52Brooke Averick?

  But just know that you're gonna make new memories.

• 46:55Connor Wood?

  I know.

• 46:55Brooke Averick?

  That Andy Bernard quote always gets me.

• 46:58Connor Wood?

  You don't know you're in the good part.

• 46:59Brooke Averick?

  I wish there was a way to know that you're in the good old days, like before you leave them. So just know that like you are in the good old days right now and that your future self is gonna be feeling the way you feel now.

• 47:10Connor Wood?

  I know.

• 47:10Brooke Averick?

  About the this time.

• 47:11Connor Wood?

  You're right.

• 47:11Brooke Averick?

  So just live in the present.

• 47:16Connor Wood?

  I wanna live in the present.

• 47:17Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, me too.

• 47:18Connor Wood?

  I need to like, that's why I read so many self-help books. All I'm looking, all I'm looking to do is live in the present.

• 47:23Brooke Averick?

  There are people that live in the past, people that live in the present and people that live in the future. People that are always worried about what's to come.

• 47:29Connor Wood?

  Yes.

• 47:30Brooke Averick?

  I think that last one is me.

• 47:33Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I think I'm, I'm kind of in the past. I'd say I'm more a past tense. And you're a more

• 47:38Brooke Averick?

  Future tense.

• 47:39Connor Wood?

  Future tense.

• 47:39Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. Whoa.

• 47:41Connor Wood?

  And this is our present tense. He's always here.

• 47:44Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, an omnipresent.

• 47:46Connor Wood?

  This motherfucker.

• 47:48Connor Wood?

  Yeah, omnipresent for sure. He knows stuff.

• 47:53Connor Wood?

  But yeah, I was like walking around and I was like, so last night I went to dinner with Kylie and Moon.

• 47:57Brooke Averick?

  Sure.

• 47:57Connor Wood?

  And we went to a place that I went to five years ago when I moved here. And I was like, and I was, and it was just random. And I was sitting there, I was like, oh, this is so weird being here. I'm about to go back to my hotel and not back to my apartment.

• 48:08Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 48:08Connor Wood?

  The weirdest thing was landing in LAX. I texted you.

• 48:10Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, you were feeling sickly.

• 48:11Connor Wood?

  And my phone was like, oh, like when you get on Uber, it's like, oh, do you wanna go to your address? And I was like, no, I'm going to hotel. Someone lives in that address now.

• 48:20Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 48:21Connor Wood?

  Ugh. And it's weird, like, I'm not even doing my, my normal walk. I went to my coffee shop that I was, that I went to today.

• 48:28Brooke Averick?

  That's good.

• 48:29Connor Wood?

  And they knew me. But it's weird. I was like, you don't know that I moved.

• 48:32Brooke Averick?

  Did you tell them?

• 48:33Connor Wood?

  No. We don't know each other like that. They don't care to know me like that.

• 48:36Brooke Averick?

  That's fine.

• 48:36Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 48:38Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, that is weird.

• 48:39Connor Wood?

  Yeah. But I ate a smoothie.

• 48:42Brooke Averick?

  That's good. I was saying this yesterday, actually, about there's this thing at bar and bat mince fez. It's like you're you have a montage usually that your parents make that's like you or at least it was back in my day. It's like baby videos of you.

• 48:58Connor Wood?

  Montages.

• 48:58Brooke Averick?

  Growing up, like throughout the years, set to like the most emotional music.

• 49:04Connor Wood?

  Montages are an act of bioterrorism.

• 49:09Brooke Averick?

  No, literally, I was that was the first time ever I was, you know, becoming a woman that day, watching my own montage, like watching my life. I was I remember having the thought like those moments are all over.

• 49:22Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 49:22Brooke Averick?

  I will never ever be able to relive that. And then I got such a horrible stomach ache that when it came time for the father daughter dance to Daughters by John Mayer, I couldn't make it. I was in the restroom. But literally, it made me so sick, the montage.

• 49:38Connor Wood?

  I get it, man.

• 49:39Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 49:39Connor Wood?

  I so get it. I like had a montage yesterday. One of the most evil features on the iPhone is the montage feature that's like, hey, um, do you want to see pictures of your dog? Set to like the like, as if it passed away.

• 49:53Brooke Averick?

  My montage that I get are all my tooth.

• 49:59Brooke Averick?

  I have, can I just say something really quickly?

• 50:01Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 50:02Brooke Averick?

  I have.

• 50:03Connor Wood?

  Even drag it out, too, if you feel the need to.

• 50:05Brooke Averick?

  Twenty one texts in a group chat between my dad and my friend Alexa. Right now, that's the group chat.

• 50:12Connor Wood?

  They're taking the reins.

• 50:14Brooke Averick?

  They have gone independently. My dad has been hacked to the gods.

• 50:19Connor Wood?

  On what?

• 50:20Brooke Averick?

  On Facebook and Instagram.

• 50:22Connor Wood?

  Oh, no.

• 50:22Brooke Averick?

  And they have his like credit card information.

• 50:24Connor Wood?

  Is he doing Bitcoin mining?

• 50:25Brooke Averick?

  He's doing, I mean, at first I was like, is this him? It's like pictures of like six different cars, like my great aunt is going to the retirement home and she's selling these cars.

• 50:35Connor Wood?

  That's a new one.

• 50:35Brooke Averick?

  And I was like, I didn't know, like Aunt Lil drove a semi. Is that a truck?

• 50:42Brooke Averick?

  Pickup, whatever. Like a huge, like, not RV, but like,

• 50:46Connor Wood?

  Like an F-250.

• 50:48Brooke Averick?

  And a forklift.

• 50:48Connor Wood?

  Oh, and a forklift.

• 50:49Brooke Averick?

  And, yeah.

• 50:50Connor Wood?

  My great aunt passed away.

• 50:51Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, and I was like, I had no idea. And then at the end, it was like, like, send me like this to secure a deposit. And I was like, okay, I don't think that's my dad.

• 51:00Connor Wood?

  Did he DM you?

• 51:01Brooke Averick?

  No, those were all posts. Solid posts. But then, like,

• 51:05Connor Wood?

  He's doing sponsored ads.

• 51:07Brooke Averick?

  Like, reached out to him. We're like, I'll take this car. And like, we're literally an inch away from sending over the money before they texted my brother. And we're like, I just want to make sure this is actually your dad. But he, it's almost gotten a lot of people. And the second it gets taken down, a new one is up. He was selling Maine Coon kittens.

• 51:27Brooke Averick?

  As well. And now he's DMing everybody on Instagram, because these like mutuals with all of my friends on Instagram, DMing all of them, like, please vote for me for like this, this pod. Please, please vote for me. I have a podcast, blah, blah, blah. Like, just click this link. And it's just like, I mean, he is toast. Like, hacked to the gods.

• 51:47Connor Wood?

  He's a multi hyphenate.

• 51:48Brooke Averick?

  And so Alexa.

• 51:49Connor Wood?

  Cat breeder, auto dealer.

• 51:51Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. My friend Alexa works at Meta.

• 51:54Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 51:54Brooke Averick?

  And so they've been really in cahoots. And like, even anything Alexa is doing is not, oh, wow. Alexa just cracked the mainframe.

• 52:03Connor Wood?

  That's awesome.

• 52:03Brooke Averick?

  And this has been going on for a week.

• 52:05Connor Wood?

  You just, you just fired up like 10 people's at home devices, by the way.

• 52:09Brooke Averick?

  Nope. My dad sent my, the hacker just ordered a $450 bag from Zappos. This is just a disaster.

• 52:25Brooke Averick?

  This is just a disaster.

• 52:27Connor Wood?

  I'm Jennifer Aniston from the famous show Friends.

• 52:29Brooke Averick?

  It really has been going on for like, so long.

• 52:32Connor Wood?

  Do you know that, realize, you know that that means that he clicked a link?

• 52:36Brooke Averick?

  Did he? He got got.

• 52:38Connor Wood?

  Yeah. Like, it has to, it has to originate from somewhere. He clicked a link.

• 52:41Brooke Averick?

  This is a disaster.

• 52:42Connor Wood?

  The worst one ever that still gets my ass. OMG, this photo of you.

• 52:46Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, we'll always get my ass.

• 52:48Connor Wood?

  I should check. My photo of me. It's for my BeReal.

• 52:53Brooke Averick?

  So I'm looking at the... Oh my god, this is the truck that my great aunt, it's like a huge massive like huge, that's what I meant.

• 53:02Connor Wood?

  For your great aunt.

• 53:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, and the forklift as well, too.

• 53:04Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh.

• 53:05Brooke Averick?

  Oh my god, what a disaster.

• 53:08Connor Wood?

  Oh, sorry.

• 53:12Brooke Averick?

  Get this.

• 53:13Connor Wood?

  What?

• 53:15Brooke Averick?

  I started a new book last night. It's called, um, what is it called? The Love Hypothesis.

• 53:23Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 53:23Brooke Averick?

  And it's by, um, Ally Hazelwood, who's this big romance writer, and I've been needing to dive into her books and I haven't gotten the chance.

• 53:30Connor Wood?

  Mm-hmm.

• 53:30Brooke Averick?

  So I dove last night. This book, it has, it's one of those with two people kissing on the cover, so I've kind of been like, I don't know.

• 53:39Brooke Averick?

  My god.

• 53:40Connor Wood?

  It's good?

• 53:40Brooke Averick?

  It is, I'm kicking my ankle bones together. And you know, I don't know if I've told you that my, usually my favorite trope in books is when the two main characters, it's like they're kind of like in enemies to lovers territory, right? And they go to the inn and there's only one bed left at the inn. Okay, and the guy's always like, I'll sleep on the floor, and the girl's like, don't be ridiculous, we're adults, you know?

• 54:04Connor Wood?

  Get in here.

• 54:04Brooke Averick?

  And then mayhem, okay? So that's usually my favorite. I activated a new favorite trope from this book last night. I don't know if trope is the right word for this, scenario?

• 54:14Connor Wood?

  It's fine, that's doesn't.

• 54:15Brooke Averick?

  Scenario?

• 54:17Connor Wood?

  May.

• 54:17Brooke Averick?

  Okay, get this. She, the main girl, has, is fake dating, um, she's a PhD candidate and she's fake dating, um, one of the professors. Okay? Cause it mutually benefits them in both ways, can't get into it, okay? Crowded lecture hall, there's no room in the lecture hall, have to sit on his lap.

• 54:38Connor Wood?

  Oh, wait.

• 54:43Brooke Averick?

  Kicking my feet.

• 54:44Connor Wood?

  Oh, no, that's.

• 54:45Brooke Averick?

  No, you would think it's weird.

• 54:48Connor Wood?

  Well, it is, see, I think it's illegal.

• 54:49Brooke Averick?

  It really, no, it's not a, it's, it might be frowned upon, but it's not illegal.

• 54:53Connor Wood?

  Oh, well, you can't.

• 54:55Brooke Averick?

  It's not his student.

• 54:56Connor Wood?

  Who, why is she in the class sitting on his lap?

• 54:58Brooke Averick?

  It's a lecture, it's a lecture, it's like a, another, uh, professor came from another school and was giving a talk. And it's like so, everyone wants to go to the talk, it is so crowded, people are being pushed left and right.

• 55:08Connor Wood?

  And.

• 55:09Brooke Averick?

  She was pushed onto his lap.

• 55:10Connor Wood?

  Oh, okay, I.

• 55:11Brooke Averick?

  And everyone thinks they're dating, so it's like, okay.

• 55:14Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 55:14Brooke Averick?

  But they're not dating.

• 55:15Connor Wood?

  Right.

• 55:17Brooke Averick?

  Yet.

• 55:18Connor Wood?

  Well, it's, I think it's a lot of people's, and I'm gonna say what it is. I know it's your favorite trope. It's definitely like a fantasy, sexual fantasy.

• 55:25Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, no shit.

• 55:27Connor Wood?

  So I think like less trope, just more like genre.

• 55:30Brooke Averick?

  Scenario.

• 55:30Connor Wood?

  Category of.

• 55:31Brooke Averick?

  Scenario.

• 55:32Connor Wood?

  Corniness. Yeah.

• 55:33Brooke Averick?

  Scenario.

• 55:34Connor Wood?

  Where you want to sleep with your professor.

• 55:38Brooke Averick?

  It's not her professor.

• 55:39Connor Wood?

  You want to sleep with a professor.

• 55:40Brooke Averick?

  It's like a colleague.

• 55:42Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 55:42Brooke Averick?

  Mostly.

• 55:43Connor Wood?

  But he's a professor and she's a.

• 55:44Brooke Averick?

  Grad student.

• 55:45Connor Wood?

  Grad student.

• 55:47Brooke Averick?

  But he's not her professor. He's a doctor.

• 55:51Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 55:52Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 55:53Connor Wood?

  So sleeping with your doctor.

• 55:55Brooke Averick?

  They've just kissed.

• 55:56Connor Wood?

  Oh, well, did they?

• 55:57Brooke Averick?

  They just kissed and lapped at. And put on sunscreen.

• 56:01Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 56:02Brooke Averick?

  On each other.

• 56:02Connor Wood?

  Yeah, they're, they're moving slow.

• 56:04Brooke Averick?

  Slow, slow burn.

• 56:05Connor Wood?

  It's gonna be a slow burn to kaboom. The fireworks by Katy Perry on Mars.

• 56:10Brooke Averick?

  I completely agree. Yeah. I was loving, I was loving the sunscreen piece as well.

• 56:16Connor Wood?

  It's important to apply.

• 56:18Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, it really is.

• 56:19Connor Wood?

  There's nothing wrong with.

• 56:20Brooke Averick?

  That's what she was saying in the book.

• 56:21Connor Wood?

  As long as it's, as long as it's not your professor, like they can absolutely apply sunscreen.

• 56:25Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, and it might be frowned upon.

• 56:27Connor Wood?

  Not illegal. Speed bump, not a stop sign.

• 56:29Brooke Averick?

  Not illegal.

• 56:31Connor Wood?

  Hey, I agree, man.

• 56:32Brooke Averick?

  Oh, we didn't talk about White Lotus.

• 56:33Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I was gonna say like, sorry to the one individual who said, love you guys so, love you so much, but stop talking about White Lotus. Love you so much, but.

• 56:42Connor Wood?

  You're getting in the podcast right here, because we're gonna talk about White Lotus.

• 56:44Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, and that's fine.

• 56:45Connor Wood?

  Um.

• 56:46Brooke Averick?

  Let me say this.

• 56:47Connor Wood?

  Yeah, go ahead, because I.

• 56:49Brooke Averick?

  That was the longest amount of time, and I can't remember when, that I didn't think about my phone.

• 56:57Connor Wood?

  I agree.

• 56:58Brooke Averick?

  Great finale. Truly. It was like, I really felt like it wrapped up perfectly. It was everything I could have wanted. It twists and turns and I didn't see, I didn't, never saw what was coming next. And like, it was just a really great ending, and there were some great emotional scenes. Carrie Coon's monologue was so fabulous. Um.

• 57:18Brooke Averick?

  I didn't realize how connected I felt to Locky until we almost lost him.

• 57:23Connor Wood?

  I felt different.

• 57:25Brooke Averick?

  Really? I was devastated to see him go. Especially what made me really sad is when he confessed that like he was aware of what he was doing during the incest moment. He was, that made me like, very sad. I was like, oh, the boy needs like help.

• 57:43Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 57:44Brooke Averick?

  And so that made me sad and he just like didn't have, he's so young. I was like, he's so young. Like he didn't get to heal.

• 57:50Connor Wood?

  Yeah. I didn't feel.

• 57:52Brooke Averick?

  He's a sweetheart.

• 57:53Connor Wood?

  I didn't feel any connection to him.

• 57:55Brooke Averick?

  Really? I was feeling so upset.

• 57:57Connor Wood?

  Someone needs to die. Honestly, like, maybe it was just like me, because I was just like, plot unrelated to the plot. And Mike White has come out and been like, get over it. There's no like, the whole thing, the whole vibe is like, there's no plot.

• 58:07Brooke Averick?

  He's an edger. That's what he said. I love him. I love that.

• 58:10Connor Wood?

  He went on a podcast. Let's talk about that in a second. Please put a pin in that so I don't forget.

• 58:13Brooke Averick?

  Edger?

• 58:14Connor Wood?

  Talk about the podcast that he went on. The, um, one, the three women, that was perfect.

• 58:22Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 58:23Connor Wood?

  Because that was such like, that was such like, I'm, I'm like, was mad, but like, I'm really excited to be here. And this is just like a development in our friendship. That was cool. And then they got drunk and all hung out and it was just like, canon.

• 58:37Connor Wood?

  I think my big moment here that I have beef with is how many people witnessed and were so close to a mass shooting? And then got on a boat and were like,

• 58:47Brooke Averick?

  I was saying the same thing.

• 58:48Connor Wood?

  The girl who's gonna be okay. It's like, hang on. How, this is, this is, this is Katy Perry going into space and then going to Beverly Hills Hotel for an espresso martini after. It's like, hang on, are we not soaking in anything? Like, are we not recovering right away? Maybe you're in shock, but like, how did you just watch? Like, the fact that like, the opening scene of the whole show is Zion in the water and he sees two floating bodies, which I'm assuming are the two that were floating bodies. How like, I don't know the timeline, but it's still daytime and you're just on a boat being like, yeah, we got that money. Like, I'm so excited. You thought your mother was killed like only moments ago in the, in the first episode.

• 59:25Brooke Averick?

  I don't understand.

• 59:26Connor Wood?

  My mom, my mom. And then those three women.

• 59:28Brooke Averick?

  No, it was like, did they hear the gunshots? Like, there was never a moment that they addressed that there was like a mass shooting.

• 59:34Connor Wood?

  That's like, the ferry's actually not leaving. We're shutting this down. Like, we just had. One, two, three, people die.

• 59:41Brooke Averick?

  And at what point do you shut White Lotus down as a whole institution?

• 59:44Connor Wood?

  So my, my, I don't know if I said this on the podcast, my prediction was like, the Rat lifts were gonna get got. And one of them were to die from the, from the blender, the blendle. And they sued White Lotus and then that's how they end up coming into a bunch of money. And they end up staying in Thailand, operating this hotel. And then, you know, that is how they end up recouping all of their losses. But, so that bugged me, the continuity issue for me was like, why is everyone okay all of a sudden? But that's just like, small fish, whatever, I guess it doesn't matter.

• 1:00:20Brooke Averick?

  But think about how much they have to cut out.

• 1:00:22Connor Wood?

  They cut out a lot.

• 1:00:23Brooke Averick?

  They were saying like, they cut out like storylines. So maybe there was like some storyline of them like, whoa, there was just a shooting.

• 1:00:32Connor Wood?

  Yeah, maybe. And I guess it was an hour and a half episode. So like, it was already really long and you probably, you have to trust in Mike White like at the end of the day. But there was also something that I thought was interesting that I don't think like that many people clocked was like, the biggest loss of all was like Belinda. She kind of did die in a way because she like gave up her morality for cash.

• 1:00:54Brooke Averick?

  She did to Porn Chai, what Tanya did to her.

• 1:00:58Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:59Brooke Averick?

  But also there's a part of me that's like, yeah.

• 1:01:03Connor Wood?

  Right. But like, she went into it with such strong morals and convictions.

• 1:01:09Brooke Averick?

  I mean, but that's like the truth of it, like $5 million that changes your like life beyond measure.

• 1:01:15Connor Wood?

  Right.

• 1:01:16Brooke Averick?

  So like, it gets to a point.

• 1:01:17Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:18Brooke Averick?

  And that's like, that's the truth of the fact.

• 1:01:19Connor Wood?

  I know. And it's like, you don't, you don't know Tanya. Like, you know, so it's, it's, you just have to be like, is this guy gonna?

• 1:01:26Brooke Averick?

  Belinda?

• 1:01:26Connor Wood?

  No, like she knew Tanya, the ex-wife that died.

• 1:01:29Brooke Averick?

  Right.

• 1:01:30Connor Wood?

  And she like had a hunch that he killed her.

• 1:01:31Brooke Averick?

  Right.

• 1:01:32Connor Wood?

  And now he's paying her and basically being like, I did kill her. So like, it's just like, you could turn in someone who could kill again. Or you could go walk away, zip your lips and go start your company.

• 1:01:43Brooke Averick?

  I guess I didn't think about Greg as an active like killer.

• 1:01:47Connor Wood?

  Did we figure out why he was having the party and like needed to have everyone over or no? Oh, because he needed to talk to Tanya?

• 1:01:53Brooke Averick?

  Belinda?

• 1:01:54Connor Wood?

  Belinda, sorry?

• 1:01:56Brooke Averick?

  Yeah?

• 1:01:57Connor Wood?

  Like, I guess, right? Like, I need everyone to come over? But it was weird that the girl was like, "I need you and your brother to come here."

• 1:02:03Brooke Averick?

  Maybe it was for that as well.

• 1:02:05Connor Wood?

  Can I say that maybe he cut some key parts that were necessary?

• 1:02:10Brooke Averick?

  Can I also say that, well, I didn't lock you get like a medical attention?

• 1:02:14Connor Wood?

  Nothing.

• 1:02:16Brooke Averick?

  Nothing?

• 1:02:16Connor Wood?

  Nothing.

• 1:02:17Brooke Averick?

  Like, he just, he saw God.

• 1:02:19Connor Wood?

  He slurped it down, too.

• 1:02:20Brooke Averick?

  He literally, like, died. Just head on to the boat.

• 1:02:25Connor Wood?

  Let's go home, y'all.

• 1:02:28Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I thought Patrick Schwarzenegger, for, for, for, for, for.

• 1:02:31Connor Wood?

  Yeah, it's fine, whatever, extraterrestrial.

• 1:02:34Brooke Averick?

  Was really, like, the star of the season.

• 1:02:36Connor Wood?

  He ended up being really impressive.

• 1:02:39Brooke Averick?

  I really loved him.

• 1:02:39Connor Wood?

  Yeah, there was a development.

• 1:02:40Brooke Averick?

  That whole family.

• 1:02:41Connor Wood?

  And then he ends up by the end, just like, he kind of found God. Like, he starts reading. I thought Locky was gonna find God because he was like, "Oh, I get it now." And I thought, I think the father kind of found God.

• 1:02:50Brooke Averick?

  They all transformed. They, no one is the same, except for the mama.

• 1:02:54Connor Wood?

  And, but I feel like we really underestimated her intellectualism. Would be a SpongeBob feature. I feel like she kind of like knew what she was doing, and, but she did develop because she didn't take her pills the whole time.

• 1:03:10Brooke Averick?

  That's very true.

• 1:03:10Connor Wood?

  She didn't have access to her pills.

• 1:03:12Brooke Averick?

  She did not have access. She did have access to her wine.

• 1:03:15Connor Wood?

  My favorite scene, my favorite scene.

• 1:03:19Connor Wood?

  "Tim, are you forgetting about the wine? There's wine right behind you."

• 1:03:24Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:25Connor Wood?

  That is so me.

• 1:03:26Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:26Connor Wood?

  When he goes, "All right, that's it, I'm going to bed." "Tim, there are several bottles of wine right behind you."

• 1:03:33Brooke Averick?

  Hello?

• 1:03:33Connor Wood?

  I was just like, like, what, you're giving up after a failed drinking attempt? Like, oh, get the bottles. That was my fa- that was my 100% takes the cake as my favorite scene in the whole show.

• 1:03:43Brooke Averick?

  You know what I thought was gonna be something but never was? When Leslie Bibb went up to the table at the very beginning and was like, "I know you."

• 1:03:50Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I, I thought so, too.

• 1:03:53Brooke Averick?

  I don't know, maybe that was a storyline that was cut, but then that scene should have been cut. I don't know.

• 1:03:57Connor Wood?

  I don't know either, man. I think the biggest thing, okay, and then they also scrapped Piper and Zion having sex and Piper like losing her virginity to him.

• 1:04:04Brooke Averick?

  I would be so upset if I were her and that was cut. I know that's like putting a lot like of yourself out there to film that and they're just like, never mind.

• 1:04:14Connor Wood?

  Well, she posted about it yesterday.

• 1:04:16Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:17Connor Wood?

  As you saw, as a friend of hers, but I am not that close with her. So I saw it and I will talk about it. She was like, shout out like me and Zion, like post hooking up.

• 1:04:26Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:26Connor Wood?

  Check it out here. And it was like an article, but so she was like on the boat, just like, I'm leaning into being rich now. Her scene, her monologue was really good.

• 1:04:34Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, she's so good.

• 1:04:36Connor Wood?

  She was dumping crocodile tears at the table.

• 1:04:39Brooke Averick?

  She was great.

• 1:04:40Connor Wood?

  It was awesome. And then Walton Goggins consistently recently has become the most interesting man in every room that he's in. Every, every podcast he does, he did Architectural Digest, nut.com. I literally like was drooling over his home.

• 1:04:55Brooke Averick?

  I care for the guy. I care for the guy.

• 1:04:57Connor Wood?

  And I just want to say a big thank you to Walton Goggins. Just this hairline that he has is just like insane. Like it's not the standard, but he goes, this is, this is me. When he was bobbing around like a cauliflower, like post death with his boot dang and his hairline was actually below the water and he was bald. I go, oh, like he really could be a like, he could pull off being bald, but like, look at that man. That's like a great looking man.

• 1:05:24Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, he could have done it, but.

• 1:05:25Connor Wood?

  No, but he said, I like my flow.

• 1:05:27Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I don't play. I think he, a lot of men are saying like, thank you for like bringing this look.

• 1:05:34Connor Wood?

  Into the zeitgeist.

• 1:05:36Brooke Averick?

  Because like I also have a receding hairline and it's like, no, baby. Like not all of you can, can do what Walton Goggins is doing.

• 1:05:41Connor Wood?

  No, no, no, sit down. This is Walton we're talking about.

• 1:05:43Brooke Averick?

  No, baby, this is Walton.

• 1:05:44Connor Wood?

  My love. And then Amy Lou.

• 1:05:47Brooke Averick?

  May her soul rest. That was, that was tragic, but I, I.

• 1:05:51Connor Wood?

  That was.

• 1:05:51Brooke Averick?

  It was a good ending.

• 1:05:52Connor Wood?

  Every, I'm watching, by the way, like that was heartbreaking. That I could have watched a whole series on them and their, on their love. He developed a lot too.

• 1:06:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. But it also was very like Romeo and Juliet and she is such a romantic that it's almost like they were going to be together forever in one way or another.

• 1:06:11Connor Wood?

  That was really tough to watch, but she, um, and someone posted this image and was like, wow, it's insane foreshadowing.

• 1:06:18Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:19Connor Wood?

  There's the yin and yang of them floating. And someone was like, yeah, I love when they put foreshadowing in the final, final moments of the final episode of the series.

• 1:06:26Brooke Averick?

  I love that tweet.

• 1:06:26Connor Wood?

  So nice. But she went and did an interview recently and was like, I know, like, they didn't want me on. Mike White fought for me to be on because FX or HBO like, thought it was ugly. Like, I know that they thought it was ugly.

• 1:06:37Brooke Averick?

  No, she said that's what she thought. Like, that's where her brain went, which is so sad.

• 1:06:42Connor Wood?

  That is so sad.

• 1:06:42Brooke Averick?

  But like, who knows what HBO's reason was. But like, yeah, that's, she said someone came up to her and was like, Mike White had to fight for you, which like, they meant it as a compliment.

• 1:06:50Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:50Brooke Averick?

  But I also would have taken it as an insult.

• 1:06:52Connor Wood?

  Right. I mean, he's sad.

• 1:06:54Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, me too. I'm obsessed with her.

• 1:06:56Connor Wood?

  Everything, everything she does too. I'm like, wow, you're cool.

• 1:06:58Brooke Averick?

  I love her.

• 1:06:59Connor Wood?

  But, um.

• 1:06:59Brooke Averick?

  And of course, her looks are the least important thing about her, but she is so gorgeous.

• 1:07:03Connor Wood?

  I started watching Righteous Gemstones because Maggie Winters is in it. And I realized Walton Goggins is like a main character of Righteous Gemstones.

• 1:07:10Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 1:07:11Connor Wood?

  And he looks insane in the show.

• 1:07:13Brooke Averick?

  I had no idea.

• 1:07:13Connor Wood?

  You recognize him when you recognize him, but like, they give him like insane veneers, which actually I'm looking at now might just be his teeth. But they whiten the shit out of him. Okay, we should go. I have to pee again. Look at him in this.

• 1:07:24Brooke Averick?

  Whoa.

• 1:07:25Connor Wood?

  He's so good, too.

• 1:07:26Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:27Connor Wood?

  Um, I'll let everyone go. I'll see you guys shortly. Very fun episode today. Thanks for having me back in the studio, everybody.

• 1:07:35Brooke Averick?

  Thank you for coming.

• 1:07:36Connor Wood?

  Um, my mic smells like someone else has been here. Oh my God, that's my YSL lip plumper. Never mind. I was like, who did you have in the studio? Anyways, um, we'll see in the bonus, if you're coming.

• 1:07:48Brooke Averick?

  See you then.

• 1:07:49Connor Wood?

  We'll see you next week. Exciting to see you then. All right. Bye.

• 1:07:53Brooke Averick?

  Bye.