Talking Limericks with Louie

Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/c/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Factor, Quinice, BlueChew, Raycon & Shipify • Factor: Eat smart at https://FactorMeals.com/badfriends50off and use code badfriends50off to get 50% off your first box, plus Free Breakfast for 1 Year. • Quince: Go to https://quince.com/badfriends for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. • Bluechew: Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code BADFRIENDS -- just pay $5 shipping. • Raycon: Go to https://buyraycon.com/badfriends to save on Raycon audio products sitewide. • Shopify: Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/badfriends YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Audio Subscribe: https://apple.co/31Jsvr2 Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 In the Wound 5:00 Shifty Little Guy 10:00 Cheeseburgers 15:00 Dating Koreans 23:00 Social Math 29:00 Afraid Not to Kill 35:00 90 Seconds of Nothing 40:00 Braveheart Joke 45:00 Korean Wolves 50:00 Bobby's Library 55:00 Press the Button 1:00:00 Louie Anderson in Baskets 1:07:00 Best Living Comic More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@7equis Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This video contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:45Speaker 01

  You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? A white dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. Oh, you two are something. We're bad friends.

• 0:57Bobby Lee?

  How about you? Do you go to therapy, Carlos?

• 0:59Speaker 03

  Weekly.

• 0:59Bobby Lee?

  You do?

• 1:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, for seven years.

• 1:01Bobby Lee?

  Oh, wow.

• 1:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:02Bobby Lee?

  What did your therapist say?

• 1:04Speaker 03

  Uh...

• 1:04Bobby Lee?

  He must have had like notepad over... You know, one of those scientific, you know, those like FBI, CIA, you know what I mean, boards?

• 1:11Speaker 03

  Connect the dots?

• 1:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:13Speaker 03

  No, it's a hot girl, and she gives me Molly.

• 1:15Bobby Lee?

  That's not a therapist.

• 1:17Speaker 03

  Oh, look.

• 1:17Bobby Lee?

  It's a stripper you're seeing.

• 1:18Speaker 03

  Right. It's the sticker for my, where I go. It's a large mod. Fantasy therapy.

• 1:23Andrew Santino?

  What is it called? California what?

• 1:25Speaker 03

  Center for Psychedelic Therapy.

• 1:27Andrew Santino?

  Oh, my God.

• 1:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's great.

• 1:29Andrew Santino?

  That's so embarrassing. So what, you did Austin, then you did Vegas?

• 1:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I went to a game in Austin, hung my family, then Vegas for a wedding.

• 1:36Bobby Lee?

  In Austin, uh, what else did you do there? You're not giving us the details.

• 1:40Andrew Santino?

  I know, there's something...

• 1:41Bobby Lee?

  There's things going on in your life, and we want to know.

• 1:44Speaker 03

  Well, I did, I did match with a girl recently.

• 1:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:48Speaker 03

  And it was the girl that we brought on stage in Houston.

• 1:50Bobby Lee?

  Ooh.

• 1:51Speaker 03

  I don't remember her.

• 1:53Bobby Lee?

  I don't remember her either.

• 1:53Speaker 03

  She's kind of Asian-y.

• 1:55Bobby Lee?

  Ah.

• 1:56Speaker 03

  And like...

• 1:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, but like, it's like 80% white, 20% Asian.

• 2:01Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's a good, that's a good mix. That's a good mix.

• 2:04Andrew Santino?

  80 white, 20, so a little Asian.

• 2:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 2:07Speaker 03

  What does it show? Uh, just the eyes are not completely, they're, you know, there's an angle to them.

• 2:13Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 2:15Speaker 03

  Like a shark, like a shark.

• 2:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 2:18Speaker 03

  Like when the eyes were being developed in the womb, the Asian.

• 2:21Andrew Santino?

  You're saying in the wound?

• 2:22Speaker 03

  Womb.

• 2:23Andrew Santino?

  It's womb.

• 2:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 2:25Andrew Santino?

  Carlos for years thought it was the wound. It's inside your wound.

• 2:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 2:29Andrew Santino?

  That's a vagina, Carlos. It's a wound. I've heard it goes inside your wound.

• 2:32Speaker 03

  But you, she, you follow her, Bobby.

• 2:35Bobby Lee?

  I do?

• 2:36Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's Marissa.

• 2:38Andrew Santino?

  Tome?

• 2:39Bobby Lee?

  Oh, no, I know, no, I know who you're talking about. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And did you, did you link up?

• 2:44Andrew Santino?

  Bring her up on the thing so I can see what she looks like.

• 2:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, I can pull up her name, her last name. Uh, no, she ghosted me and then.

• 2:50Bobby Lee?

  Exactly.

• 2:51Speaker 03

  Yeah. No, but she followed me on Instagram, so we're doing okay.

• 2:54Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 2:55Andrew Santino?

  You're getting ghosted a lot lately? What's going on?

• 2:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's all a numbers game.

• 2:58Bobby Lee?

  Yes, I remember at the show.

• 3:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:00Bobby Lee?

  I now remember. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 3:01Speaker 03

  My dad's a camel.

• 3:08Andrew Santino?

  She's cute.

• 3:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, she's cute.

• 3:10Andrew Santino?

  So you, she ghosted you?

• 3:11Speaker 03

  She ghosted me, but then I think she responded because it was easy because I was already back in LA.

• 3:15Andrew Santino?

  Ah.

• 3:16Speaker 03

  Like.

• 3:16Andrew Santino?

  Oh, she waited to knew you, till she knew she were gone?

• 3:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:19Andrew Santino?

  Smart, smart girl.

• 3:20Speaker 03

  It is smart.

• 3:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 3:21Speaker 03

  So I'm gonna try and trap her into a date in Austin.

• 3:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I, I, I think we should move to the Midwest.

• 3:26Andrew Santino?

  Where do you want to go?

• 3:26Bobby Lee?

  It's a, it's a better dating pool.

• 3:29Andrew Santino?

  Oh, it is for sure, yeah.

• 3:30Bobby Lee?

  Every date I go on here is just like, you want to listen to my EP? No! It's not good! It's not good. It's never good.

• 3:36Speaker 03

  They don't say EP anymore.

• 3:37Bobby Lee?

  Oh, whatever. Oh, do you want to, you want to see my paintings? It's never good.

• 3:42Andrew Santino?

  What do they say if they don't say EP? What do you mean? They say?

• 3:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, EP. It would be like, uh, go to my like SoundCloud or whatever.

• 3:48Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 3:48Speaker 03

  Wouldn't it be like, here's like a record?

• 3:50Andrew Santino?

  Uh, well, I bet you some of the Eastside girls probably are like.

• 3:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, the Eastside girls.

• 3:53Andrew Santino?

  Pressed a record.

• 3:54Bobby Lee?

  They press it, dude.

• 3:55Speaker 03

  I didn't know they were pressing.

• 3:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:57Speaker 03

  I'm sorry.

• 3:58Bobby Lee?

  Eagle Rock girls? Come on, dude.

• 4:00Andrew Santino?

  They be pressing.

• 4:00Bobby Lee?

  They, they be pressing.

• 4:01Andrew Santino?

  They absolutely be pressing, my.

• 4:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I mean, that's, okay, so that's the prototype of, I think, who, what I want to marry.

• 4:08Speaker 03

  Oh, you mean really hot?

• 4:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, hot, really hot, notice nothing about your past.

• 4:16Andrew Santino?

  This has always been your, the mixed Asian thing is your key, that's your key demo.

• 4:19Bobby Lee?

  I've dated, you've seen, you've met.

• 4:20Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 4:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 4:22Andrew Santino?

  That's what you love the most.

• 4:23Bobby Lee?

  It's, I love it, yeah, because Kalila was mixed.

• 4:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 4:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, um.

• 4:27Andrew Santino?

  Other girls were mixed.

• 4:28Bobby Lee?

  Other girls are mixed, you know, I dated some mixies, yeah, yeah. Because full is a lot, it's too much.

• 4:34Andrew Santino?

  Well, it's heavy.

• 4:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. What do you mean?

• 4:36Andrew Santino?

  It's heavy.

• 4:37Bobby Lee?

  It's heavy.

• 4:37Andrew Santino?

  Well, because if you go meet parents and they're both whites.

• 4:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 4:41Andrew Santino?

  That's a lot of defense you gotta play.

• 4:43Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 4:43Andrew Santino?

  But if one of them is part of your lineage in any way.

• 4:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 4:46Andrew Santino?

  If you got like the Asian dad, you're like, how you doing?

• 4:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 4:48Andrew Santino?

  You know, like at least you got a little in, but if it's two whites, that's a lot of danger.

• 4:51Bobby Lee?

  Also, there's bullying going on because like, I remember when I was dating Sarah Hyland. She's, she's, she lived, she was from Louisville, Kentucky.

• 4:58Andrew Santino?

  Mmm, our favorite.

• 4:59Bobby Lee?

  And we went one dinner, one dinner, I came to the dinner, family dinner. Everyone was wearing kimonos.

• 5:06Andrew Santino?

  Well, that's respectful.

• 5:07Bobby Lee?

  They were.

• 5:08Andrew Santino?

  That's respectful.

• 5:09Bobby Lee?

  And then they had a tight Hello Kitty shirt for me, so I put it on, it was really, everyone laughed.

• 5:14Andrew Santino?

  That's cute.

• 5:15Bobby Lee?

  It is cute, right, but it's like, it would have been nice if there was another Asian there.

• 5:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Oh, you're the only one.

• 5:20Bobby Lee?

  I was the only one, yeah.

• 5:21Andrew Santino?

  They should have brought another one in.

• 5:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 5:23Andrew Santino?

  Just hire one just to be there.

• 5:24Bobby Lee?

  And when the grandma, her grandmother didn't really like me that much.

• 5:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 5:27Bobby Lee?

  But you, I did a little Asian thing. I have Asian techniques for them to like me. I went to the grand piano and I started playing.

• 5:35Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 5:36Bobby Lee?

  Cause I knew she was in the living room and then I can see her trying, starting to like me.

• 5:40Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 5:41Bobby Lee?

  You gotta bring, you either do that or do your Taekwondo or something, you have to tell them you have Asian skills, I think.

• 5:46Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 5:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 5:46Andrew Santino?

  Get your abacus out of your car.

• 5:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 5:51Andrew Santino?

  Wait till you see.

• 5:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 5:53Andrew Santino?

  Dude, I was at the wedding last night, um, my good buddy, what a fun little beautiful wedding.

• 5:57Bobby Lee?

  Can I ask you, can I ask you what skaters were there?

• 5:59Andrew Santino?

  Yes, no, it was, of course there's skaters, cause Sean is a phenomenal skater.

• 6:02Bobby Lee?

  Mm-hmm.

• 6:02Andrew Santino?

  Eric Costin's one of his closest friends, Frosty, he's always around, he's a good dude.

• 6:06Bobby Lee?

  Are you nice, cause I have an Eric Costin story.

• 6:09Andrew Santino?

  We know each other, I know Costin, I played golf with him a few times.

• 6:11Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, okay.

• 6:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, why, you don't like Eric?

• 6:13Bobby Lee?

  Long, long time ago, I went to a skate party.

• 6:16Andrew Santino?

  Ruh-roh.

• 6:17Bobby Lee?

  Ruh-roh, what? Wrong, wrong, wrong time.

• 6:19Andrew Santino?

  What did you do?

• 6:20Bobby Lee?

  Nothing, and I met, I, someone tried to introduce me to him and he was really cold.

• 6:24Andrew Santino?

  To you?

• 6:24Bobby Lee?

  To me, and I remember walking away from that going, I hate that guy.

• 6:29Andrew Santino?

  It's one of the best.

• 6:30Bobby Lee?

  But back then, I don't know, maybe it was because I'm, I'm a weird guy.

• 6:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you are very weird.

• 6:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know, I come to parties, you know, shifty, you know?

• 6:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, a little shifty.

• 6:40Bobby Lee?

  I'm a shifty little guy.

• 6:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 6:42Bobby Lee?

  But I remember coming out of the, what?

• 6:44Speaker 03

  It's very urban, like crackhead-y.

• 6:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I was like, what's that, man?

• 6:48Andrew Santino?

  Right, very.

• 6:48Bobby Lee?

  I love your skate style.

• 6:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that is crack, that's crack.

• 6:51Bobby Lee?

  Nolly, huh?

• 6:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, switch, switch, switch, yeah, switch.

• 6:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Laser flips, dude, you love them?

• 6:58Andrew Santino?

  Hard flip, dog.

• 6:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, I think maybe it was my shifty vibe.

• 7:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 7:02Bobby Lee?

  But you know, sometimes you meet somebody and you know, you don't know what people are going through.

• 7:06Andrew Santino?

  You're right, you don't know what he's.

• 7:07Bobby Lee?

  You don't know, but I always take it personally.

• 7:10Andrew Santino?

  You should.

• 7:10Bobby Lee?

  And I walk away from them going, I need revenge. Yeah, I write down what I'm gonna do.

• 7:15Speaker 03

  Cause you wanna be worshipped.

• 7:16Andrew Santino?

  That's right, praise, worship, that's what the boy need. And that's.

• 7:19Bobby Lee?

  No, I wanna be treated like a human being, dude.

• 7:21Andrew Santino?

  Not true.

• 7:22Bobby Lee?

  I wanna be acknowledged as a human being.

• 7:23Speaker 03

  Like a normal celebrity.

• 7:24Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, what I'm saying is, is that.

• 7:27Andrew Santino?

  Ooh.

• 7:28Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that hurt.

• 7:28Andrew Santino?

  Gearing him up.

• 7:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you got me geared up, dad.

• 7:30Andrew Santino?

  You're gearing him up, dude.

• 7:31Speaker 03

  Well, I know that's why you wanna go to the Midwest too, less competition with celebrities.

• 7:34Andrew Santino?

  Ooh, he's getting geared up.

• 7:37Speaker 03

  I think that too, though. I know what you're thinking.

• 7:39Andrew Santino?

  Gearing up the bobo.

• 7:40Bobby Lee?

  I'm on Raya, right?

• 7:41Andrew Santino?

  Yup.

• 7:42Bobby Lee?

  And a girl's on Raya, Bradley Cooper, Bobby Lee, which one?

• 7:46Speaker 03

  Carlos.

• 7:47Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, you're on there too.

• 7:48Speaker 03

  Exactly.

• 7:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 7:50Andrew Santino?

  I gotta say, I think Bradley.

• 7:54Andrew Santino?

  Just honest.

• 7:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I think Bradley.

• 7:56Andrew Santino?

  Honest guess.

• 7:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 7:57Andrew Santino?

  Honest guess. No, yeah, there was a bunch of cool skaters there.

• 8:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 8:01Andrew Santino?

  Just guys that like, I grew up like loving from when I was, it's just such a weird, it's awesome. It's a weird thing to be friends with, guys that you're like.

• 8:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 8:08Andrew Santino?

  You know, and it was an awesome wedding, it was fucking beautiful, everyone was so rad and nice, cause you know, like, we don't, I don't know, I don't know his family that well.

• 8:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 8:17Andrew Santino?

  So it was really nice.

• 8:17Bobby Lee?

  What's the mix of the family?

• 8:19Andrew Santino?

  What do you mean?

• 8:19Bobby Lee?

  What is he?

• 8:20Andrew Santino?

  Ooh, interesting.

• 8:21Bobby Lee?

  Filipino?

• 8:22Andrew Santino?

  I don't know, I'm not gonna tell you.

• 8:23Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 8:24Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 8:24Bobby Lee?

  There's some mix, though.

• 8:25Andrew Santino?

  There is mix.

• 8:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, a brown.

• 8:27Andrew Santino?

  He's not a fully.

• 8:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, there's a brownie. There's some brownies in there. No?

• 8:31Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 8:32Bobby Lee?

  What are you, what are you being so mysterious about?

• 8:34Andrew Santino?

  I don't know.

• 8:36Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 8:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, there's a mix.

• 8:38Bobby Lee?

  There's a mix.

• 8:38Andrew Santino?

  There's a mixed family, yeah.

• 8:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 8:39Andrew Santino?

  It was rad, though, and everyone was super fucking cool to us. And very nice, and it was a beautiful wedding venue. It was one of those moments where you're like... And you know what's so funny about skater weddings? Is that you know, no matter what you wear, you're good.

• 8:51Bobby Lee?

  Ah.

• 8:51Andrew Santino?

  Because everyone's wearing cool shit. Like, there isn't this weird expectation for like, anybody to to like, go out of their way to be like, "I gotta make sure..." It's like, no, they just want you to look cool, be casual, and have a little bit of, have a little bit of-

• 9:04Bobby Lee?

  Let me say something right now. If I have a wedding, dress up.

• 9:08Andrew Santino?

  No, no, they did. You know, I'm saying this incorrectly.

• 9:10Bobby Lee?

  I understand. I know, I, let me guess.

• 9:12Andrew Santino?

  What I'm trying to say is like, the vibe was very like- No tuxedos. It was like, cool clothes.

• 9:15Bobby Lee?

  It was like how Ron Howard dresses. Right?

• 9:20Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 9:20Bobby Lee?

  Like when he's like, a suit, but a t-shirt and a ball cap. Ron Howard style.

• 9:25Andrew Santino?

  It was like skaters. They all have great style. So it was just like, cool, like, this one dude had a fucking super wild green suit on. It looked so sick.

• 9:31Bobby Lee?

  Ah.

• 9:32Andrew Santino?

  Like, some dudes had just the dopest gear. I was like, and also wearing vans, like rocking vans.

• 9:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, they dressed so good.

• 9:38Andrew Santino?

  They just have, because skaters have the best fucking style, dude.

• 9:41Bobby Lee?

  They do.

• 9:41Andrew Santino?

  They just have like, this vibe of like, they pull it off, it's, it looks well-to-do. And then still, casual as fuck. But it's still dressy.

• 9:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 9:50Andrew Santino?

  Like this dude, uh, um, this dude Cole from Metalwood. He had this just dope-ass purple suit on, and I was like, "This motherfucker..." It was so-

• 9:57Bobby Lee?

  Like Dumb and Dumber.

• 9:59Andrew Santino?

  Exactly.

• 9:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 10:01Andrew Santino?

  It just looked so fly. I wore a traditional black suit, so I just, that's all I wear to weddings.

• 10:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 10:06Andrew Santino?

  I only wear-

• 10:06Bobby Lee?

  You look good.

• 10:07Andrew Santino?

  Just black. Well, because look at this. I can't, what color are you gonna? Malto is like, "Colors are optional. What color do you want to do, dude? Do you like a bright color?" And I was like, "It's gonna be black, bud." I can't wear, look at this.

• 10:16Bobby Lee?

  I have to go to Jimmy Out, you know that, that, it says, "Suits for five foot four or less?"

• 10:23Bobby Lee?

  On Ventura? I have to go there now. And whenever I'm there, they're like, "Yeah, Seth, Seth Green just came in." Like, all the smaller actors. Yeah, me and Brad Williams just picked up three suits.

• 10:34Andrew Santino?

  Tom Cruise.

• 10:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe, yeah. See what it's called? It's-

• 10:38Andrew Santino?

  Joe Pesci, Elijah Wood, Tom Cruise, Kevin Hart, brother, you're, Michael J. Fox, you are in good, you're in good company.

• 10:45Bobby Lee?

  They all go to that Jimmy Ow's place.

• 10:47Andrew Santino?

  Jimmy Ow's, short, what's it called?

• 10:48Bobby Lee?

  See, see what, what that place is called, because I love the guy, because he's always there.

• 10:51Andrew Santino?

  What is it? Big and tall? Is it, uh, small and short? Jimmy Ow, small and shorts? Dave Franco, a lot of guys that are under 5'8".

• 10:59Bobby Lee?

  No, um, how about suits five foot four or less, um, Sherman Oaks?

• 11:10Andrew Santino?

  So funny. No tailoring needed.

• 11:13Bobby Lee?

  Hello? Hello?

• 11:15Andrew Santino?

  Hello?

• 11:16Bobby Lee?

  Hello? Hello, Uncle Louis?

• 11:24Bobby Lee?

  Are you being real? Thank you.

• 11:27Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 11:28Bobby Lee?

  Did you really go to Bob's?

• 11:29Andrew Santino?

  Wow. Let him sit in that blue chair, Louis.

• 11:31Bobby Lee?

  Louis.

• 11:32Andrew Santino?

  Wow, Louis, this is, this is extravagant.

• 11:38Speaker 05

  Because I wanted a cheeseburger.

• 11:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, so you brought five of them?

• 11:43Speaker 05

  That's it.

• 11:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 11:45Speaker 05

  No, I was, I, I was looking for, I don't know, like an In-N-Out or something.

• 11:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 11:49Speaker 05

  I was kind of in a hurry and I needed, I, because I need to eat before a certain hour. I wake up in a, in a cold sweat if I eat too late. So.

• 11:56Andrew Santino?

  Did you eat?

• 11:57Speaker 05

  So, so I went into Bob's. I was like, oh, this is like a family burger, like cool, right? So I go in and I said, and I pictured coming here with a bag, a paper bag, full of burgers.

• 12:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 12:08Speaker 05

  And just going, here, everybody, have some burgers. And I sat down and I ate, uh, Bob's big burger.

• 12:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 12:15Speaker 05

  And it was really disgusting.

• 12:18Speaker 05

  And I got a vanilla shake, but I had a paper straw, so I couldn't drink it.

• 12:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 12:22Speaker 05

  And then they gave me the burgers in this fucking harbor. I thought, I wanted it to be like an old fashioned, like cops, uh,

• 12:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 12:29Speaker 05

  Is it as bad as I?

• 12:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 12:31Speaker 05

  Mine was?

• 12:31Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they're bad.

• 12:33Bobby Lee?

  Louis, can I eat it later? Once you leave, can I eat it, once you leave?

• 12:37Speaker 05

  The whole thing was a mistake. He has three over there.

• 12:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 12:41Andrew Santino?

  No, no, he will eat those.

• 12:43Bobby Lee?

  I'm on Ozempic.

• 12:43Andrew Santino?

  Oh, that's right, you can't.

• 12:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 12:45Speaker 05

  I like that being Ozempic, on Ozempic is like being kosher or something.

• 12:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 12:50Andrew Santino?

  It is. I mean, he did throw up for the first like two weeks he was on it.

• 12:53Bobby Lee?

  It was tough. No, I had to switch from Ozempic to Wegovy.

• 12:55Andrew Santino?

  We're on Wegovy.

• 12:56Bobby Lee?

  I'm on Wegovy now.

• 12:57Andrew Santino?

  You don't do that shit. You would never.

• 12:59Speaker 05

  Never.

• 13:01Speaker 05

  Fuck that.

• 13:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 13:03Speaker 05

  I don't know. I would if it was a good idea, but I don't.

• 13:05Andrew Santino?

  It's not a good idea.

• 13:06Speaker 05

  It's terrible. I think it's, uh, you're gonna die from that. You think, you really do? No, I don't. Of course not. An asshole. No, I, I, uh, don't, I don't like, I get nervous about things like that going and, you know, that change how you feel or that change you neurologically. Oh, neurologically. And also I like the fight I'm in with weight and stuff. Yeah, yeah. Like it. It's something to lean against, you know? Yeah, I think you lost weight, no? Oh, oh, thank.

• 13:32Andrew Santino?

  Dude, he was doing, you know, he was setting us up. That's all he wanted us to say.

• 13:34Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 13:35Andrew Santino?

  He looked so slender.

• 13:36Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 13:36Andrew Santino?

  Me?

• 13:37Speaker 05

  Well, I've been working out and eating more. Oh, that's good.

• 13:41Andrew Santino?

  Good.

• 13:41Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah. Eating. When you do, when you separate, you start working out more and eating less, you're really hurting yourself. Hmm. Uh, so I'm just going like a more exercise. Yeah. So let's lay it on. Hmm.

• 13:53Andrew Santino?

  What's, what's the one exercise that you actually enjoy? Cause none of them are that enjoyable.

• 13:57Speaker 05

  I kinda like the way it all feels.

• 13:59Andrew Santino?

  You do?

• 13:59Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 14:00Andrew Santino?

  Fuck, I don't know. I can't get through it lately. I guess maybe it's also the, if the depression exercise is like I'm doing it because I know I need to do it.

• 14:08Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah, no, yeah.

• 14:08Andrew Santino?

  Not cause I wanna do it.

• 14:10Speaker 05

  How old are you?

• 14:11Andrew Santino?

  Forty-two.

• 14:11Speaker 05

  Yeah, I mean, it sure starts to change. I'm fifty-eight. It starts to change.

• 14:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah?

• 14:15Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 14:16Andrew Santino?

  What happens?

• 14:17Speaker 05

  It starts feeling different. I mean, you just sort of like get philosophical about it and you go like, I like the way it feels when my body heats up cause I'm going on like uphill treadmill or whatever, I'm a stairmaster. Hmm. Uh, and if I don't wanna do it, I just don't do, I never do it if I don't want to.

• 14:30Andrew Santino?

  Oh, see, I do that all the time.

• 14:31Speaker 05

  And I'm starting to eat whatever I want.

• 14:34Andrew Santino?

  Like, and what do we, what do you mean?

• 14:35Speaker 05

  Doesn't matter. Just eat it because somebody is explaining this to me that if you prohibit, you're in this constant tension that you then have to binge to release. Hmm. But if you just go like, whatever I want, I'm gonna eat it when I want it. What happens is your body goes like, that fucking hurt, that actually hurt, that was not a good idea. And then that memory makes you go, oh yeah, I don't want that this time. I want less things than I used to. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. You get hunger pains at night? No.

• 15:06Bobby Lee?

  You don't. You. Wait.

• 15:09Andrew Santino?

  He's still thinking about the old world.

• 15:10Bobby Lee?

  No, what I'm saying is, is that late at night, sometimes I'm like, should I get a sandwich?

• 15:14Andrew Santino?

  No, you, well, here's the difference. You're not explaining. He stays up all night, so he'll be up at four or five and he, it's now been seven hours.

• 15:20Speaker 05

  It's important to me to go to sleep and stay asleep. So if I, if I eat too close to bedtime.

• 15:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 15:26Speaker 05

  I wake up in the, at like three in the morning and it's wet.

• 15:30Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I see.

• 15:30Speaker 05

  Body's trying to digest and it doesn't.

• 15:32Bobby Lee?

  You think it's a white thing? Excuse me for saying.

• 15:34Speaker 05

  Well. White versus you?

• 15:39Speaker 05

  You mean white in a way that you're not?

• 15:42Bobby Lee?

  I, I think our bodies are different, that's all.

• 15:43Andrew Santino?

  They are. That's true.

• 15:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 15:45Speaker 05

  Well, but you stay up all night.

• 15:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I do. But because I, you know, I am a.

• 15:49Speaker 05

  An Asian thing or?

• 15:50Bobby Lee?

  I think it's an Asian thing.

• 15:51Speaker 05

  Are you Korean?

• 15:52Bobby Lee?

  Whoa.

• 15:53Speaker 05

  I don't know anything.

• 15:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, that's a good guess.

• 15:56Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 15:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Because when white people guess, they never get it right.

• 16:00Speaker 05

  You could be Chinese.

• 16:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, could I be?

• 16:02Speaker 05

  I almost said you could have Chinese.

• 16:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 16:08Andrew Santino?

  You could have Chinese.

• 16:08Bobby Lee?

  But that was a really good guess.

• 16:09Andrew Santino?

  Korean, yeah.

• 16:10Speaker 05

  It's like four. I mean, what's?

• 16:12Bobby Lee?

  No, there's a punch.

• 16:13Andrew Santino?

  No, there's.

• 16:13Bobby Lee?

  There's Thai, Cambodia.

• 16:15Speaker 05

  No, I know.

• 16:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 16:16Speaker 05

  You're in on purpose.

• 16:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that was really good.

• 16:19Speaker 05

  You have a gong, so it's fair to talk about this.

• 16:22Bobby Lee?

  That's right. Yeah, yeah.

• 16:23Speaker 05

  Right? You have a gong and a fortune cat.

• 16:25Bobby Lee?

  You have a fortune cat? Yeah, yeah.

• 16:27Andrew Santino?

  His father made this before he died. That's why we, this is an homage to his father.

• 16:30Speaker 05

  Really?

• 16:31Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, no, but, but.

• 16:32Speaker 05

  Did he make it as a weapon or?

• 16:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 16:34Andrew Santino?

  We think about it every time. We, when we, this is when we remind.

• 16:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 16:40Andrew Santino?

  He feels his father.

• 16:41Bobby Lee?

  Stop doing that, dude. It's fucking weird.

• 16:43Andrew Santino?

  If you wanted a good burger, you should have taxed us. We would have told you where to go.

• 16:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 16:45Andrew Santino?

  That's not, that's not where to go.

• 16:47Speaker 05

  I really regret it.

• 16:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that sucks. There's so many good burgers, too.

• 16:50Bobby Lee?

  You single right now, Louis?

• 16:53Speaker 05

  Um, no.

• 16:54Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you're seeing somebody?

• 16:55Speaker 05

  Um, yeah, I'm with somebody very much.

• 16:59Bobby Lee?

  Oh, very good.

• 17:00Speaker 05

  Very in love with somebody.

• 17:01Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's great.

• 17:02Speaker 05

  Yeah, somebody I want to be with.

• 17:03Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 17:04Andrew Santino?

  He's looking for love.

• 17:05Bobby Lee?

  No, what I'm saying is, is that, because I was curious, does, has, do, does Louis ever date Asians? Have you ever dated an Asian in your life?

• 17:13Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 17:14Bobby Lee?

  Oh, good.

• 17:15Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 17:15Bobby Lee?

  Very good, very good.

• 17:17Speaker 05

  I dated a Korean woman for a little while, yeah.

• 17:21Andrew Santino?

  And what did you, what, what was that experience like? Because I've been dating a Korean woman for six years now.

• 17:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 17:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 17:26Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah.

• 17:27Andrew Santino?

  And.

• 17:28Speaker 05

  So you are Korean?

• 17:29Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 17:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I am. That's why I said, you, you got it right.

• 17:31Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 17:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 17:34Bobby Lee?

  I thought he, yeah. Yeah, very good. Yeah, yeah.

• 17:37Speaker 05

  Well, one thing, because she told me, the woman I dated told me, she, I asked her, what's your last name? And she was like, I mean, guess, you're gonna get it in two guesses.

• 17:46Bobby Lee?

  Alright.

• 17:47Speaker 05

  Because it's like Lee or Park.

• 17:49Bobby Lee?

  It's true.

• 17:50Speaker 05

  Like, it's only one of those.

• 17:51Bobby Lee?

  There's some Cho's.

• 17:52Speaker 05

  Cho's.

• 17:53Bobby Lee?

  There's some Cho's, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's envious of a couple Cho's, that's why.

• 17:56Speaker 05

  But, uh, what was it like? So she was, I really liked her very much. She was cool. And she was, she had an interesting, she was, uh, a different, she talked about being Korean without my asking her, you know? It was part of her, uh, she said that it was, um, uh, um, there wasn't many, in my, also, she was Korean of my generation. There was nobody. She was like in a desert of Koreans in her, raised in New Jersey. And she said that she had like two friends and they are still very close because, uh, they felt very isolated.

• 18:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 18:28Speaker 05

  There just wasn't many people from their culture.

• 18:29Bobby Lee?

  Same with him.

• 18:30Speaker 05

  But she told me interesting things like that when Korean people say, hello, they say, uh, when have you eaten? Or like they say, have you eaten?

• 18:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 18:38Speaker 05

  That's their, how you doing?

• 18:39Bobby Lee?

  What is that? What's it, what, your mom says that? When we see her? Peckalpa? Peckalpa? Peckalpa? Peckalpa? Yeah. Are you hungry? Are you hungry? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. His mom does say that. And then pebulo is, I'm hungry. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm full. I'm full. Yeah, yeah. And I know gochuj, which is penis. Okay. Donkumok, which is butthole. Yeah. Jut, which is tit. Boji, pussy. That's all I know. That's all I know. That's all, I think that's all I know.

• 19:01Speaker 05

  Plural for tit? You can only say?

• 19:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, bojies maybe. Yeah.

• 19:04Speaker 05

  Boji boji.

• 19:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 19:08Bobby Lee?

  It's like titty titty. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And then here's another thing, I, I learned, um, juk juk. No. Yeah, no, let me finish. What? Go, go, go. You know what juk juk is? Yeah, isn't that jizz? No, no, juk juk isn't jizz.

• 19:22Speaker 05

  Trying to start a Korean car.

• 19:29Bobby Lee?

  Juk juk is slang for sex. So I asked a Korean guy, I go, I've never, like, why juk juk? He goes, that's what sex sound like. Juk juk.

• 19:41Speaker 05

  Lots of pussy farts in Korea.

• 19:44Bobby Lee?

  I guess they're queefing a lot over there, you know what I mean? But yeah.

• 19:47Andrew Santino?

  They are.

• 19:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I've never heard juk juk when I'm having sex.

• 19:49Speaker 05

  No.

• 19:50Andrew Santino?

  Well, I'll.

• 19:51Speaker 05

  I always hear a Korean guy in the room going, juk juk.

• 19:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:56Andrew Santino?

  Sitting in the cock chair.

• 19:57Bobby Lee?

  Factor, fall always feels like a reset between back to school, busier routines, and shorter days. Finding time to cook can be tough. That's why I love Factor.

• 20:07Andrew Santino?

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• 20:18Bobby Lee?

  Me too.

• 20:19Andrew Santino?

  You can choose from a wide selection now of meal options. They got seafood choices, they got salmon and shrimp at no extra cost, which usually costs more from the other guys. And you can support your wellness goals, enjoy more GLP-1 friendly meals. Bobby, that's for you.

• 20:33Bobby Lee?

  Yes, and for the first time, my friends, try Asian-inspired meals.

• 20:37Andrew Santino?

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• 20:37Bobby Lee?

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• 20:41Andrew Santino?

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• 20:49Bobby Lee?

  Eat smart at factormeals.com/badfriends50off and use code BADFRIENDS50OFF to get 50% off your first box plus free breakfast for one year.

• 20:58Andrew Santino?

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• 21:10Bobby Lee?

  Quince, as the weather cools, I'm swapping in the pieces that actually get the job done. Warm, durable, and built to last. And Quince delivers every time with wardrobe staples that carry you through the season.

• 21:24Andrew Santino?

  That's right, Quince has the kind of fall staples you'll actually want to wear on repeat. They sent us a bunch, and thank you to Quince for doing that. 100% Mongolian cashmere and I've never had that before, but my goodness that I enjoy it. From just $60, classic fit denim and real leather and wool outerwear that looks sharp and holds up. That's the best part about it. It looks good. It looks very expensive.

• 21:43Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 21:43Andrew Santino?

  But it's reasonably priced.

• 21:45Bobby Lee?

  I got my eye on their suede trucker jacket. It's perfect for layering and just looks really casual, but put together, my friend.

• 21:53Andrew Santino?

  Yes, it does. By partnering directly with ethical factories and top artisans, Quince cuts out the middlemen to deliver premium quality at half of the cost of similar brands. So how are you going to get yourself wrapped up in some Quince? Tell them, Bob.

• 22:05Bobby Lee?

  Layer up this fall with pieces that feel as good as they look. Go to quince.com/badfriends for free shipping on your order and a 365 day return.

• 22:14Andrew Santino?

  Now available in Canada too. That's Quince, Q-U-I-N-C-E.com/badfriends. Free shipping and 365 day returns. quince.com/badfriends.

• 22:22Bobby Lee?

  BlueChew. Oh my God. I'm a 54, 54 year old man and sometimes my baby's asleep.

• 22:30Andrew Santino?

  Sometimes your little Toki is going to bed and you gotta wake him up.

• 22:32Bobby Lee?

  Toki the dum-dum and I need BlueChew. I take a BlueChew, I chew it. Yang, yang, yang, right? And then like 45 minutes later, it's party time.

• 22:40Andrew Santino?

  I'm telling you, BlueChew is the original brand offering chewable tablets for better sex. Guys, if you are looking to have some of the best sex of your life, Bobby calls me every time he's done having sex and goes, "I BlueChewed it and I blew her away." It's not just about performance. It's about legacy or third legacy. Get it, Bob?

• 22:57Bobby Lee?

  I love it.

• 22:58Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, give her a group chat, something to talk about. When you lay it down, you know they're talking about how it gets up. Nothing makes you more of a legend than a little BlueChew. Discover your options at bluechew.com.

• 23:07Bobby Lee?

  And we got a special deal for our listeners. As always, get your first month of BlueChew free. Just use promo code BADFRIENDS at checkout and pay $5 for shipping.

• 23:17Andrew Santino?

  That's it. Join BlueChew's mission to upgrade humanity one thrust at a time. Head to bluechew.com for more details and safety info and big thanks to BlueChew for sponsoring the podcast.

• 23:26Speaker 05

  Yeah, so you're in love. Paid loud for that, yes.

• 23:28Bobby Lee?

  That's great.

• 23:29Speaker 05

  Yeah, she's great. She's awesome. Yeah.

• 23:31Bobby Lee?

  Is there limerence involved?

• 23:34Speaker 05

  No, I don't think so.

• 23:37Speaker 05

  I mean, both of us are single.

• 23:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. But is there, is there one person more like, you know what I mean, obsessed with the other person?

• 23:43Speaker 05

  No, I think we feel, we feel pretty equal. And it's nice, you know, like. I I heard somebody talking once about like, you know, I don't want to be the kind of guy who picks girls up at the airport like that's I heard that said is a bad thing.

• 23:58Andrew Santino?

  Hmm.

• 23:58Speaker 05

  Picking them up at the airport.

• 24:00Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 24:00Speaker 05

  And I've picked her up at the airport.

• 24:03Andrew Santino?

  You like her.

• 24:03Bobby Lee?

  Well, how did that?

• 24:04Speaker 05

  She's that one time I was coming home and she goes, hey, I could pick you up at the airport. I'm like, you don't have to. And she said, can I please pick you up at the airport? I was like, good, we're we're equal. We're met.

• 24:12Andrew Santino?

  Oh. Depends on what airport, to be honest. I mean, that is a big piece of it.

• 24:16Speaker 05

  What?

• 24:16Andrew Santino?

  You it depends on the airport. I mean, like.

• 24:18Speaker 05

  Oh, for sure.

• 24:19Andrew Santino?

  My wife has never, never, I mean, I but I don't I would, it's such an annoyance. I like, I don't even want her to. Because I'm pissed off when I get to the airport. She's gonna show up annoyed. It's like, I'd rather you just be chill at home.

• 24:33Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 24:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, cuz I, yeah.

• 24:34Bobby Lee?

  I don't like it when they don't do the full thing.

• 24:37Andrew Santino?

  What do you mean?

• 24:38Speaker 05

  What?

• 24:38Bobby Lee?

  Let me finish. All right. Let me finish.

• 24:41Andrew Santino?

  He speaks in limericks.

• 24:45Bobby Lee?

  Let me finish. Okay. All right. Kalila, my ex-girlfriend, she goes, I'll pick you up at the airport, right? But when I would land, she wouldn't be there. And she's like, I'm stuck in traffic. No go.

• 24:55Andrew Santino?

  You're right.

• 24:55Bobby Lee?

  Be at the when the escalers go down, where the baggage claim is, be there with a sign. All right. And then sometimes it's like, come to the parking lot, because I'm not gonna go in. You still have to find my car. No, fuck you.

• 25:07Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 25:08Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You come to me.

• 25:10Andrew Santino?

  You come to me.

• 25:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 25:11Speaker 05

  I think that's fair.

• 25:12Bobby Lee?

  Thank you.

• 25:12Speaker 05

  Yeah, I mean, well.

• 25:15Speaker 05

  It's not a full endorsement.

• 25:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 25:16Speaker 05

  I'm just being polite.

• 25:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 25:18Andrew Santino?

  I just don't expect, I just, it just, I'm doing my best to travel better now, to have a better attitude, cuz it's such a nightmare when you get.

• 25:25Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 25:26Andrew Santino?

  But that's why whenever she used to do it when we were younger and broke, she was like, you know, you can get a fucking cab.

• 25:33Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 25:33Andrew Santino?

  Like, you make money out when.

• 25:35Speaker 05

  Yeah, but you're married.

• 25:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but I'm saying before we were married, when we were dating, she was like, get a fucking cab. I'm sitting here.

• 25:40Speaker 05

  How long you been married for?

• 25:41Andrew Santino?

  Almost 10.

• 25:42Speaker 05

  Fantastic.

• 25:43Bobby Lee?

  Fantastic.

• 25:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 25:44Speaker 05

  You have kids?

• 25:45Andrew Santino?

  No kids, can't have kids.

• 25:48Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 25:48Andrew Santino?

  She's got a penis.

• 25:51Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 25:51Speaker 05

  Okay, I don't know.

• 25:53Andrew Santino?

  No, she doesn't. No, no, she doesn't.

• 25:58Bobby Lee?

  Is it worth it?

• 25:59Speaker 05

  What?

• 26:00Bobby Lee?

  Having children. You have some.

• 26:02Speaker 05

  I have two.

• 26:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. That's two. That's some.

• 26:05Speaker 05

  I think some is, I think some is three or more.

• 26:08Bobby Lee?

  Oh, do you really?

• 26:09Andrew Santino?

  A couple is two, some is three.

• 26:11Bobby Lee?

  Is some three?

• 26:12Speaker 05

  I think some, it's like a series is three or more.

• 26:14Andrew Santino?

  It's crazy to teach an Asian math. That's like the wildest shit.

• 26:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:17Andrew Santino?

  Couple is two, some is three.

• 26:18Speaker 05

  It's more cultural, social math.

• 26:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:21Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 26:21Andrew Santino?

  He's bad at all of them.

• 26:22Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 26:24Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so that you have, um, a couple.

• 26:27Speaker 05

  I have two children.

• 26:28Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 26:29Speaker 05

  It's worth it. I think, I, I think anybody who's on the fence about it should just do it.

• 26:33Bobby Lee?

  Really?

• 26:34Speaker 05

  It's never a mistake. It's impossible for it to be a mistake.

• 26:38Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 26:39Speaker 05

  A person.

• 26:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:41Speaker 05

  For whatever happens.

• 26:42Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 26:43Andrew Santino?

  Well, your kids are grown, like grown, grown, right?

• 26:45Speaker 05

  Twenty and twenty-three.

• 26:46Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 26:46Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 26:48Andrew Santino?

  Out of college, or at college, any of them?

• 26:50Speaker 05

  College, yeah.

• 26:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:51Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 26:51Andrew Santino?

  That's fucking great.

• 26:53Bobby Lee?

  Cause I remember your first HBO special, The Half Hour, I, I think that was your first, right, on HBO or no?

• 26:58Speaker 05

  I did one, uh, back in the nineties that was just goofy jokes, but the one I did that was a half hour was all.

• 27:03Bobby Lee?

  You talked about your kids and stuff. Yeah, that was a great special.

• 27:05Speaker 05

  Thanks.

• 27:06Bobby Lee?

  Amazing.

• 27:07Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 27:07Bobby Lee?

  You know, I met you, I, I don't, you don't remember when I met you. I, I think I brought it up the last time I saw you. Is on, on Mad TV with Lauren Kowalski.

• 27:14Speaker 05

  I remember.

• 27:15Bobby Lee?

  You don't remember meeting me?

• 27:16Speaker 05

  I do because, uh, my friend Dino wrote for you guys.

• 27:21Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, Dino.

• 27:22Speaker 05

  And I was on the lot doing something else. I don't remember. Maybe Cedric, the Entertainers Show.

• 27:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that's right, that's right.

• 27:27Speaker 05

  And so, yeah, I do. I, I used to see you around. I didn't really, we didn't like hang out.

• 27:30Bobby Lee?

  Hang out, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:32Andrew Santino?

  Did you write for Cedric's show?

• 27:34Speaker 05

  I did.

• 27:34Andrew Santino?

  You did?

• 27:35Speaker 05

  Cedric the Entertainer Presents.

• 27:37Andrew Santino?

  Pretty great.

• 27:38Bobby Lee?

  You wrote on that show?

• 27:39Speaker 05

  I was a writer and co-executive producer, yeah.

• 27:41Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 27:42Andrew Santino?

  Give us some, give us some good said bits.

• 27:45Speaker 05

  Cedric?

• 27:46Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 27:47Speaker 05

  I mean Cedric was like Jackie Gleason. He was like a great performer.

• 27:50Andrew Santino?

  He's fascinating.

• 27:51Bobby Lee?

  He's so fascinating.

• 27:51Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 27:52Andrew Santino?

  He really, like, and now, cause now he's on like a, uh, like a traditional, uh, sitcom and it's massively popular, right?

• 27:59Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 28:00Andrew Santino?

  Neighbor, The Neighbor?

• 28:01Speaker 05

  Something like that, yeah, I'd never seen.

• 28:02Bobby Lee?

  That's still there? That's still going on?

• 28:04Andrew Santino?

  Oh, it's gotta be. It's, those network shows, they'll just, they keep.

• 28:07Speaker 05

  He was one of the most natural performers I ever worked with. The guy could make anything funny.

• 28:12Andrew Santino?

  Fucking eight seasons, that thing.

• 28:14Speaker 05

  We had this bit that I wrote called, um, Texas versus Maine. And it was some like, local access cable show in Texas, that he's, and he's a Texan. And it's about how much better Texas is than Maine, and he hates Maine. And does this kinda like, kinda like, uh, what's his name, the, uh, cartoon character with cowboy hat.

• 28:38Andrew Santino?

  I know, I can't think of his fucking name.

• 28:39Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah.

• 28:41Andrew Santino?

  Yosemite Sam.

• 28:41Speaker 05

  Yosemite Sam, he did sort of an impression of him. And I used to love watching him do it. He was, he was really something. A good guy too, like really good guy.

• 28:50Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 28:50Andrew Santino?

  You haven't talked to him in years.

• 28:53Speaker 05

  Oh, I haven't?

• 28:54Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 28:55Speaker 05

  You haven't talked to him in years.

• 28:58Andrew Santino?

  I can tell.

• 28:59Speaker 05

  It's been a few years.

• 29:00Andrew Santino?

  Well, cause you're talking about him in past tense, like he died.

• 29:02Speaker 05

  Like he died.

• 29:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 29:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 29:03Speaker 05

  Yeah. No, we just, we didn't, we didn't stay friends. I mean, not, not actively, but I'm always happy when I do see him.

• 29:10Andrew Santino?

  I said, hey.

• 29:12Bobby Lee?

  Do you hug him or no? Cause that, that, that tells me a lot.

• 29:15Andrew Santino?

  I don't think you're a hugger.

• 29:16Speaker 05

  We hug.

• 29:17Andrew Santino?

  You do?

• 29:17Speaker 05

  Yeah, I like to hug people.

• 29:18Andrew Santino?

  Okay, good.

• 29:19Bobby Lee?

  I mean, when I saw you the other day, you gave me a side hug. That was very fruitful.

• 29:22Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 29:23Andrew Santino?

  I'll tell you, I'll tell you the best thing that, uh, the thing that warmed my heart, you said to me, this was great. This is probably the best piece of advice I've gotten from someone. We were at the Cellar and we were in, um, we were in the fat black lounge. And you were in the hallway and you were like, that was, that was really good. When I got offstage, I said, oh, thank you, man. And you go, that's family stuff. That's great. And I go, yeah, oh, thank you. And you go, that other stuff? Get rid of that. And I was like, okay. And you go, the family stuff, that was good. And I go, right, right. And you go, but the other stuff?

• 29:54Bobby Lee?

  No, he didn't.

• 29:55Andrew Santino?

  Yes, he did. Yes, he did.

• 29:57Bobby Lee?

  You did? In a jokey way.

• 29:59Speaker 05

  I, no, I meant.

• 30:02Speaker 05

  It was fucking great. Oh, you did? I saw him at the Fat Black. I had never seen him. I've seen clips of you guys together and stuff. Yeah. And so I was just watching him and he was doing this stuff about his family and he was doing a really smart bit about if you about how you can about resentment towards his parents and that later when they become weaker, you start controlling their lives, you can get revenge on them. And it sounded really like the feelings felt real. Yeah. And that was really engaging. And then he talked about if you really want to get back at people that age, give them Bluetooth for presents, like Bluetooth items. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 30:42Speaker 05

  And and it was a great bit. And then he started doing some about Trump and the those issues that, you know, and I was like, I just.

• 30:53Speaker 05

  And that's how I feel about most people. Yeah. He's as though I think I said, you're as good as anybody while you're talking about your family. Yeah. You're as good as anyone, like really great. And then the other things, you sound like everyone. Right. You sound just like everyone else. Wow. Because this thing, my take on the, you know, everyone's trapped in like four issues for like since 2016. Yeah. Trump, trans, blah, da, da, da. It's just the same fucking stuff. And here's my take on the woke this. It's just so boring. Yeah. And and everyone takes a shot on Twitter and on the podcasts, we all do it. So on stage, it's like, why, why you can fashion a great, you know, no one has your family, no one has your

• 31:38Speaker 05

  voice, you know, it's totally interesting to watch somebody, you can tell where they're, you know, where they're coming from ethnically, where they're coming from in where they're their kind of family they had. That's, I'll listen to that all day. Yeah.

• 31:52Bobby Lee?

  Can I ask you?

• 31:53Speaker 05

  It was awesome. I loved it.

• 31:54Bobby Lee?

  Can I ask you a question?

• 31:56Speaker 05

  Yeah, you don't have to ask first. I'm on your show.

• 31:59Bobby Lee?

  I know, but can I ask you one?

• 32:01Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 32:02Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 32:06Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so um, I want, no, this is the way, cuz I wanna be real for a second.

• 32:11Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 32:11Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so um, I've always been obsessed about killing.

• 32:16Speaker 05

  Uh huh.

• 32:17Bobby Lee?

  So I'm not as prolific.

• 32:19Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 32:19Bobby Lee?

  Right?

• 32:20Speaker 05

  Yeah, I understand that.

• 32:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and I haven't changed my, I mean, right now I'm doing a special for Hulu, so I'm trying to come up with new stuff, but my point is, is that I'm so afraid of not killing that I, I've been, I'm in a fucking rut.

• 32:34Speaker 05

  I totally.

• 32:34Bobby Lee?

  Because of that fear.

• 32:35Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 32:36Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? And it's like, I know that there's more that I can do. I know that there's more that I can say, and I just don't do it because I hate bombing. You know what I mean? And it's like, I just know that I'm not growing, and I know that, you know, I mean, you're so, you're very prolific. If I can say that.

• 32:54Speaker 05

  Yes, I am.

• 32:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you're one of those comics that like, if you're performing, like, all the comics will run into the room to watch you. When I perform, they fucking leave. They're fucking fired. They don't leave. They do, they do. The whole background.

• 33:07Speaker 05

  None of that matters.

• 33:09Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 33:10Speaker 05

  Fuck the other comedians. That's not your audience.

• 33:12Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 33:13Speaker 05

  You're not doing this for them.

• 33:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, who am I doing it for?

• 33:15Speaker 05

  They're competition and their colleagues. They're just people that also do what you do.

• 33:19Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 33:19Speaker 05

  Has nothing to do with them.

• 33:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. How do I get over this rut, though?

• 33:23Speaker 05

  Yeah, what you're describing is a very important thing, and it's a very vulnerable place to be. You know exactly what you have to do. Your problem is, your solution's right in front of you.

• 33:33Bobby Lee?

  What is it?

• 33:34Speaker 05

  It's just you gotta, you gotta get over it. No, in other words, you're, you're, I mean, what I'm saying is you're way ahead of the game cuz a lot of people don't understand what their problem is.

• 33:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. I totally understand.

• 33:45Speaker 05

  And that is the basic problem for most comedians.

• 33:51Speaker 05

  Because they're afraid of that feeling. I'm not killing. I was raised to kill as a comic. I started in Boston. And in Boston, it was like, you might get hurt if you don't kill, cuz the room might get really nasty.

• 34:03Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 34:04Speaker 05

  And someone might throw shit at you, they might wait for you outside. Like, there's a feeling in Boston of like, there's, the bad version of this is fucking bad. And also, there was this kinda like this biting spirit there. So I liked it. I was eighteen when I started. So I was killing, killing, killing. It took me a long time to realize that this is, I still try to untrain myself. There's bits where I'm like, that crushes, but it's not making me better. I gotta stop doing it. So it's not only not wanting to bomb, it's also like backing away from the obvious sometimes and just going like, yeah, that bit annihilates. Yeah. What are we doing? You know better. Yeah.

• 34:47Speaker 05

  Yeah, it's not, it's no quality to it. There's nothing that's, it's not taking me anywhere new. I mean, all, the thing is, the problem with comedians is they take everything very personally. And it's a, it's a scientific thing, kind of comedy, and it's an art. So you should think of the, like, privilege the work. What's, what matters is this bit, right? Like, I was watching this kid in New York, and he was doing bits about the election, the last one. And it had been over for a while. And, and the bits were strong. Yeah. But people weren't really into it. Yeah. And he made some comment on stage like, oh, I guess you guys don't like my politics or something.

• 35:27Speaker 05

  And I pulled him aside afterwards and I said, it's cuz it's an old topic. No one wants to hear about it, old elections. And he said, I know, but this bits were killing. And I don't wanna let him go. Yeah. And what I said to him was, cuz he was a very young guy, so I said, if you took the two minutes of political material, and instead you stood there and did nothing, you'd grow more as a comic. Wow. It'd be better for you as a comedian. Yeah. I think every comedian should try to put, especially in these workout sets in the clubs. Yeah. At some point, have like an alarm go off or some way that you go, I'm gonna do ninety seconds. I got no act.

• 36:07Speaker 05

  Just ninety seconds of just, of just try to see what happens. If you don't keep coming and coming and coming with it.

• 36:16Speaker 05

  It's that panic moment of like, I gotta kill right now. If you can just get past it. It's like the sound barrier, you know, that big explosion.

• 36:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 36:25Speaker 05

  On the other side of the sound barrier is like, there's a calm. You go like, oh, I'm, I got power now. I'm not killing. They're looking at me. This is weird.

• 36:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 36:35Speaker 05

  I'm still here. I'm alive. I can do a bunch of things I couldn't do on the other side of this.

• 36:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 36:42Speaker 05

  You could only do one thing when you need it to be kill, kill, kill. But if you get past that, you have like this bunch of other options that you're like, wow, I could do this. They're looking at the, the room comes alive when you stop getting laughs.

• 36:55Bobby Lee?

  It does?

• 36:56Speaker 05

  People, yeah, people start going, what is going on? There's no, cause there's a ha, ha, ha, puts you to sleep.

• 37:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:01Speaker 05

  Ha, ha, ha. They're not even listening after a while. You know, if you're doing jokes, ha, ha, joke, ha, ha, you could one, always do one joke where you go, and then I flap the jab black laps, ha, ha, it like where you literally make no sense and you'll get. That's why a lot of comics have like 15 tags and they're getting jokes just cause the, the motor's in motion. They're not funny.

• 37:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:23Speaker 05

  But you just get, you know what I mean?

• 37:26Bobby Lee?

  I mean, it's.

• 37:28Speaker 05

  You just have to, you're 54. What are you waiting for?

• 37:32Speaker 05

  It's time.

• 37:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 37:34Speaker 05

  It's never too late.

• 37:35Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 37:36Speaker 05

  You need to start going on stage and having bad sets.

• 37:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:41Speaker 05

  You have to.

• 37:41Bobby Lee?

  You have to, yeah.

• 37:42Speaker 05

  You have to.

• 37:43Bobby Lee?

  That's it, that's.

• 37:44Speaker 05

  You won't grow.

• 37:46Bobby Lee?

  No, you, you have to.

• 37:47Speaker 05

  No, no, no. I do it all the time. Every time I go out to start writing a show, I, I struggle mightily for months.

• 37:56Andrew Santino?

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• 37:59Bobby Lee?

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• 38:35Bobby Lee?

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• 38:40Andrew Santino?

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• 38:43Bobby Lee?

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• 38:43Andrew Santino?

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• 39:03Bobby Lee?

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• 39:17Andrew Santino?

  When we started doing the show, we had so much fan art that we got and we started doing merch with fans and sending it out to you guys. And Shopify streamlined this whole thing and made it so simple and so easy to run our online business. Without them, we'd be falling to pieces because Mccone, Carlos and Fancy would be doing all of it and we don't want that. Imagine being able to guarantee that shopping is always convenient for your customers. Endless aisle, ship to customer, buy online, pick up in store, all made simpler. So customers can shop how they want and staff have the tools to close the sale every single time.

• 39:47Bobby Lee?

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• 39:58Andrew Santino?

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• 40:23Bobby Lee?

  Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at Shopify.com/badfriends.

• 40:29Andrew Santino?

  Go to Shopify.com/badfriends. That's Shopify.com/badfriends.

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• 41:19Bobby Lee?

  And nowhere in time, on set, you're like, I've lost the room and I have to do a joke that I know is proven, or no, you stay in the-

• 41:26Speaker 05

  Try not to do that. I do, I'm weak when I do that, but I try to stay in it and just go like, this is, like, when I'm developing a new hour, I go to the cellar, I go in, I haven't been in for a while, I do five minutes, maybe just a few jokes I have, and then I get off. And next time I do 10. When I get to about 20-

• 41:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 41:46Speaker 05

  Then it starts filling in and it starts getting strong. When I have a strong 20, I put it away. I'm like, you can't do these jokes anymore. And I go back in with nothing. And I start with another zero, hard.

• 41:59Bobby Lee?

  What's so funny?

• 42:00Speaker 05

  And then you get- That Braveheart joke.

• 42:03Bobby Lee?

  Well, I'm gonna do it. Okay.

• 42:05Speaker 05

  1996.

• 42:11Bobby Lee?

  So I don't do it on the special?

• 42:13Speaker 05

  He's got a Braveheart joke.

• 42:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. It's funny.

• 42:16Speaker 05

  It's fresh. Listen, my last special, or one of the last ones, I did a special, a joke about Good Will Hunting, and it was-

• 42:22Bobby Lee?

  I love it.

• 42:23Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 42:24Andrew Santino?

  Well, you did a whole thing about the Bible, that's fucking old.

• 42:26Speaker 05

  The Bible-

• 42:29Speaker 05

  But I was been out for a while.

• 42:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Louis, I'm gonna make a deal with everyone in this room, okay?

• 42:34Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 42:34Bobby Lee?

  For my special, I'm gonna, cause I've never done a special.

• 42:38Speaker 05

  Right.

• 42:38Bobby Lee?

  Right? So I have to do the things I've amassed.

• 42:41Speaker 05

  No, you don't.

• 42:43Bobby Lee?

  For my special, it's in two months.

• 42:46Speaker 05

  Okay, well.

• 42:48Bobby Lee?

  I know. But for the next, you know what I mean, thing?

• 42:52Speaker 05

  Yes. Look, do the special and clean house.

• 42:54Bobby Lee?

  I'm cleaning house.

• 42:55Speaker 05

  And then start over.

• 42:56Bobby Lee?

  I'm never gonna do those jokes again.

• 42:57Speaker 05

  That's great. That's great. Yeah. I love that.

• 42:59Andrew Santino?

  He's gonna clean house the way a hoarder does, where they're like, don't really, don't really get rid of that.

• 43:05Andrew Santino?

  Put that right there and then.

• 43:07Speaker 05

  I'll throw out one of the four Kermit's.

• 43:11Speaker 05

  I'm keeping the other three Kermit's unboxed.

• 43:14Bobby Lee?

  I'm gonna tell you, I'm gonna tell you why I'm doing it.

• 43:17Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 43:17Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 43:17Bobby Lee?

  Because when I perform, I don't feel good. I feel pain.

• 43:22Speaker 05

  Yeah, man.

• 43:22Bobby Lee?

  Every fucking set.

• 43:24Speaker 05

  I've been there.

• 43:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I feel pain, I feel disgusted. When I drive home, I don't feel good.

• 43:28Speaker 05

  You got, you totally get what's going on.

• 43:30Bobby Lee?

  I know, there's something going on.

• 43:32Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 43:33Bobby Lee?

  And it's like, when I was younger, and I was like bombing, and I was like trying new things and going, what's my voice and all that kind of stuff? It was, in retrospect, I mean, back then you were struggling, there was no money, and getting stage time and all the fucking shit that you have to go through. But still, in terms of performing, it felt new. It felt fresh.

• 43:53Speaker 05

  Jokes that kill are traps. They're prisons.

• 43:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 43:57Speaker 05

  And they keep you from, I mean, you're stuck in these bits. It's horrible.

• 44:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 44:02Speaker 05

  I had the same opening joke for like 10 years or more. Uh, and I, every time I said it, it felt like I was pissing out of my, my own mouth. I hated it. I hated it so much.

• 44:17Andrew Santino?

  Can you tell me, what is the joke?

• 44:18Speaker 05

  Yeah, and it's actually about piss. I hate. I hate saying it.

• 44:22Andrew Santino?

  Please do it.

• 44:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 44:23Speaker 05

  It's, oh god, it's so horrible. I mean, it is what it is. It's a joke, but it's about, I live in New York, it was like, New York is the only city where you actually have to say things like, hey, that's mine, don't.

• 44:34Andrew Santino?

  Don't piss on it. Yeah, I love that.

• 44:36Bobby Lee?

  That's a great joke.

• 44:36Speaker 05

  You like it?

• 44:37Andrew Santino?

  I like, I like, yeah, I've heard you.

• 44:38Speaker 05

  It's a fine joke, but do it for 10 years every night. Like, it's not.

• 44:42Andrew Santino?

  You felt, he, that's, um, he's autistic, sorry about that. He'll, he'll move furniture the whole show. It's just kinda what he does.

• 44:50Bobby Lee?

  Wait, when you, when you try new stuff, do you have a button, or is it sometimes like just a premise?

• 44:56Speaker 05

  Yeah, usually it's a premise, like I come up with, I'll be, you know, walking around and I'll, I'll have a thought or in a conversation where I'm like, that's, I know that area is a bit.

• 45:06Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 45:07Speaker 05

  And I'll write down the premise, just the word, like two words of what it is. And then I wait, I try not to think about it too much, till I get on stage. And then I go on stage the next time and I explain it to the first audience, and that's how I write it usually.

• 45:23Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 45:23Speaker 05

  And then it gets refined over time. Once in a while, bits come to me full, like, well, I don't know where that came from, but just like a joke, like I'll come up with this, I'll think of a sentence and then I'll think of a joke. Cause I do still like jokes, you know?

• 45:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 45:40Speaker 05

  So I, jokes, I just, they come, they pop in. Uh, but bits, where you're talking about something, that's, that's the way I do those, you just, you know there's an area, there's something there, and you wait, cause they're listening, there, there's no better, they're the instrument. So when you're working in the dark, it's like being a composer, they like to have a piano, they like to hear it, you know? Not just sit there and go, this, you know, have it all in their head.

• 46:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 46:07Speaker 05

  When you have an audience, that's your instrument, so, you, they're sitting there waiting and that makes you, that brings it out of you, like, and it makes you come up with it funny, cause that's what you, that's what you do.

• 46:18Andrew Santino?

  Pitch Louis some bits, you got some, he's got some new shit. Pitch him some.

• 46:21Bobby Lee?

  No, I'm not, no!

• 46:22Andrew Santino?

  Pitch him some bits, man.

• 46:23Bobby Lee?

  I'm not doing it now!

• 46:24Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, do it.

• 46:24Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, I'm not doing that right now.

• 46:26Andrew Santino?

  He's got a couple in the chamber, come on, tell him.

• 46:28Speaker 05

  Tell me one.

• 46:28Andrew Santino?

  Tell him one of the new bits.

• 46:29Speaker 05

  One idea for new bit.

• 46:30Andrew Santino?

  Come on.

• 46:30Bobby Lee?

  Well, I have a bit, bit that, um, I'm trying to get to work.

• 46:34Andrew Santino?

  Look at Louis when you do it, don't look at me.

• 46:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I wanna look at you too, I wanna look at you, I wanna look at you right now, no.

• 46:38Speaker 05

  Exercise for you.

• 46:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 46:39Speaker 05

  It's good for you.

• 46:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. So I have a bit about like, um, my dad used to tell wild stories. I don't know if they were true or not. Right? Like when I was 14, my dad goes, when I was your age, okay? In Korea, I used to kill wolf. Right? I go, there are wolves in Korea? So many wolves, you mean everywhere wolf, you know? One time wolf attack, I break a leg, right? I take a stick pop, pop in the face, right? Then a couple of days later, my friend, um, um, John brought his core giver to my house. And my dad goes, how old is your wolf? I'm like, you used to kill dogs?

• 47:18Bobby Lee?

  But it, you know, it's not.

• 47:19Andrew Santino?

  It's a great bit.

• 47:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 47:20Speaker 05

  What's wrong with you?

• 47:21Bobby Lee?

  It doesn't get a huge laugh though. On stage, it gets kind of a giggle.

• 47:26Andrew Santino?

  It's a great bit.

• 47:27Speaker 05

  Key, you gotta do that bit.

• 47:29Andrew Santino?

  See?

• 47:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 47:30Andrew Santino?

  It's a great bit.

• 47:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 47:32Andrew Santino?

  Give him another one.

• 47:33Bobby Lee?

  No, I don't want to give him.

• 47:34Speaker 05

  You gotta keep, you gotta keep doing it.

• 47:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 47:37Speaker 05

  All of every bit I have.

• 47:39Bobby Lee?

  I give up.

• 47:40Speaker 05

  That destroys.

• 47:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 47:42Speaker 05

  Started either weak or like pissing people off. But I just keep doing it and it's like, it's like walking to a firing squad and saying, shoot me. It's hard.

• 47:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 47:54Speaker 05

  And you go, and they go, uh huh. But these, all these bits are really, there's still a few in, in my set now, even though I'm doing theaters. That I'm like, I still know I'm not getting what I should be getting with that one. It still feels weak, but I still believe in it. So I'm still, and it keeps changing and changing.

• 48:09Bobby Lee?

  So I gotta, cause sometimes.

• 48:11Speaker 05

  You gotta keep doing it. You gotta do that bit over and over again.

• 48:13Bobby Lee?

  Okay, that's what it is.

• 48:14Speaker 05

  Yeah, over and over.

• 48:14Bobby Lee?

  Over and over.

• 48:15Andrew Santino?

  Are you doing the bit, are you doing the bit about the, uh, how we can mount and dismount an entire race in one?

• 48:22Speaker 05

  I don't remember. I remember those words.

• 48:24Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I love that.

• 48:25Speaker 05

  But I don't remember what the.

• 48:25Andrew Santino?

  The way you said that, that stuck out.

• 48:27Speaker 05

  Mount.

• 48:27Andrew Santino?

  And you're saying the way that we say it, like when you have someone on the fucking news.

• 48:30Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 48:31Andrew Santino?

  Says like.

• 48:31Speaker 05

  Oh, that, yeah. No, I don't do it anymore.

• 48:33Andrew Santino?

  Why, dude?

• 48:34Speaker 05

  Yeah, I had a whole bunch of stuff about people, the way people talk in the news. And I had some about Trump and all this stuff and, and that stuff, I just decided I didn't want, and I'll, this may help you.

• 48:48Bobby Lee?

  Okay, okay.

• 48:49Speaker 05

  I was.

• 48:49Andrew Santino?

  Give him that bit.

• 48:52Speaker 05

  You can have it. So I was doing, um, when I went back on the road, I took a year and a half off of comedy. I wasn't, I was gonna quit, like I decided I didn't wanna do it anymore. And I, so it was a really great break because I wasn't like just taking time off. I was like, I'm done. But then I started coming up with ideas, jokes, so, you know, I just got full. I wanted to do them. And then I was like, just let's just get back to it. But when I first started going out with this new set, it had these weird bits that are kinda strange. And then this killer chunk about the news and all that stuff. And I was like, where do I put that? That it, where does it hurts these other bits? How do they, you know? And then I was in Omaha doing a bunch of shows at the Funny, Funny Bone.

• 49:37Speaker 05

  And, uh, one night I was like, what if tonight you don't do, you don't do those bits at all? Just take them out. And I took them out and everything else in the show kinda rose up. And the show just got, cause it had a cohesion to it. And it just got better, like your, your bit is competing with these other bits, like it can't follow Braveheart or whatever you're killing.

• 50:01Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I see.

• 50:02Speaker 05

  Yeah, so once you're done with this special.

• 50:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 50:05Speaker 05

  That bit should be like your.

• 50:06Bobby Lee?

  No, I'm doing that bit on the, in the special.

• 50:08Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 50:08Bobby Lee?

  It's a new bit.

• 50:08Speaker 05

  But I mean, these bits will do better, the new ideas.

• 50:11Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I see what you're saying.

• 50:12Speaker 05

  When they have a little feeling. But those, also the bit about the news, Brian Regan did a bit kinda like it.

• 50:19Andrew Santino?

  No, not like that. Your, your, his spin was the way people talk in the news then versus now. And you were saying the way that you'll have an anchor.

• 50:29Speaker 05

  No, but he did, he did a thing about people saying, uh, there's a, uh, there was a fire today in Nicaragua.

• 50:36Andrew Santino?

  Oh, Nicaragua, oh, that's right.

• 50:37Bobby Lee?

  Right, right, right, right, right, right.

• 50:40Speaker 05

  So I was doing, I was doing that.

• 50:41Andrew Santino?

  It was kinda near it.

• 50:42Speaker 05

  It was near enough.

• 50:43Andrew Santino?

  The phrasing was great. I, the phrase stuck out of my brain when you go, how did you mount and dismount an entire race in one word?

• 50:49Speaker 05

  And with one word of your life.

• 50:51Andrew Santino?

  I love that, yeah.

• 50:51Speaker 05

  Yeah, it was fun to do.

• 50:53Andrew Santino?

  I like that bit.

• 50:54Speaker 05

  Uh, and then I did a thing about homeless versus unhoused.

• 50:58Andrew Santino?

  The unhoused.

• 50:59Speaker 05

  But I just don't wanna, I don't, I'm, I'm tired of having clever takes on what's going on in the world.

• 51:04Bobby Lee?

  Oh, fuck.

• 51:04Speaker 05

  I'm tired.

• 51:06Bobby Lee?

  Fuck, my, my whole act is fucked. I have a whole homeless bit.

• 51:10Speaker 05

  That's just.

• 51:10Bobby Lee?

  That's five minutes of homeless.

• 51:12Speaker 05

  That's just me.

• 51:13Bobby Lee?

  Oh, my God.

• 51:14Andrew Santino?

  His special's literally called clever take on what's going on.

• 51:18Bobby Lee?

  Fuck.

• 51:19Andrew Santino?

  We gotta change.

• 51:20Bobby Lee?

  I'm just gonna put the greatest hits out and then the next time I'm gonna grow and it's gonna be.

• 51:24Speaker 05

  What about you? Where are you at?

• 51:26Andrew Santino?

  I just put out a fucking special on Hulu, which, you know, which was, it was a good time for me to put out a special because it was Charlie Kirk got shot, anniversary of nine 11, and then they took Jimmy Kimmel off the air and I was like, "Pull it out a special, baby." Drop it right there. Fucking insane. And Hulu, he's doing it with Hulu too.

• 51:46Speaker 05

  Is it your first one?

• 51:48Andrew Santino?

  That's my Hulu, that's number one. I did one before. I did one previous. Well, no, I did technically, that's.

• 51:54Bobby Lee?

  You've done two on Netflix?

• 51:55Andrew Santino?

  No, Showtime then Netflix. Netflix was the first like real, real special, but.

• 51:59Speaker 05

  Does Hulu have it forever or do you get it back?

• 52:02Andrew Santino?

  No, you get them back. Like Netflix too, they took mine down after it was like a licensed, so I might just put it up on YouTube. We were talking about.

• 52:09Speaker 05

  Yeah, don't worry about it. It's so, this is a body of work you're compiling over time.

• 52:13Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 52:14Speaker 05

  So it's got a life on Hulu right now, but I did a special called Hilarious and it was on Epix.

• 52:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 52:23Bobby Lee?

  Great company, great company.

• 52:25Speaker 05

  Who cares?

• 52:25Andrew Santino?

  Who gives a shit?

• 52:26Speaker 05

  It doesn't matter.

• 52:27Andrew Santino?

  No, I know, it doesn't, it's all.

• 52:28Speaker 05

  All of the, back when I used to, before I started selling them myself, I used to just find who wants this one? And it would be like Showtime or one was Epix, one was this, it just doesn't matter.

• 52:38Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 52:38Speaker 05

  They're all, you're compiling a library.

• 52:40Andrew Santino?

  But now you'll sell them yourself forever. You're never gonna go to a thing again. You'll just do just you now, right?

• 52:45Speaker 05

  I don't know.

• 52:46Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 52:46Speaker 05

  I don't know. I mean, I kinda like to be on a platform just to get more new eyeballs on the work maybe, but I don't know. We'll see.

• 52:54Andrew Santino?

  Also plug the book.

• 52:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Do you have a copy of the book?

• 52:58Speaker 05

  Uh, no.

• 52:58Andrew Santino?

  Dude, this is so funny. You would never read it.

• 53:01Bobby Lee?

  I have a library.

• 53:03Andrew Santino?

  Oh, you want it just in the?

• 53:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I have everyone's thing.

• 53:05Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 53:06Speaker 05

  You guys have a copy? They should have sent you one.

• 53:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, Bobby has a copy. Well, no, honestly, where's my copy? I literally don't have a copy. I handed it to you.

• 53:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he did hand it to you.

• 53:13Bobby Lee?

  Where is it? It's over here somewhere. It's gotta be over here somewhere.

• 53:16Andrew Santino?

  It's in this pile of books.

• 53:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I have a pile of books over there. I'm gonna read it, I'm gonna read it, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 53:21Speaker 05

  No, but I mean, you should show it to people, right, or something?

• 53:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 53:25Speaker 05

  Whatever, man.

• 53:27Andrew Santino?

  Where is the book?

• 53:29Bobby Lee?

  Star Trek The Next Generation X-Men.

• 53:30Speaker 05

  I didn't write that.

• 53:31Bobby Lee?

  At the Catholic Bible.

• 53:33Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 53:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I don't know where it is, dude.

• 53:35Andrew Santino?

  Bring it up on the fucking, bring it up there.

• 53:37Bobby Lee?

  Bring it up on the fucking thing, you know?

• 53:38Speaker 05

  That's probably.

• 53:39Andrew Santino?

  Wait, my favorite thing is him getting mad. It's your book, he gave it to you.

• 53:44Bobby Lee?

  I fucking don't remember it.

• 53:45Andrew Santino?

  There it is. There it is, baby. Ingram.

• 53:49Bobby Lee?

  Ingram.

• 53:49Speaker 05

  That's my new, I just wrote that.

• 53:51Andrew Santino?

  And that's about Rick Ingram from Chris Rock's.

• 53:54Bobby Lee?

  What is it about Ingram?

• 53:55Speaker 05

  It's about a little boy who's, uh, kicked out of his house when he was like nine and he's just walking around Texas. And he's alone and he's, uh, and he's, and life gets really hard for him.

• 54:05Bobby Lee?

  Like Chauncey Gardner from Being There.

• 54:07Speaker 05

  Yeah, but he's like much younger.

• 54:09Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 54:10Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 54:10Bobby Lee?

  But Chauncey Gardner, the character was young because he had, had no influence except for television, so he was kind of a child.

• 54:17Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 54:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 54:18Speaker 05

  Well, that's not what this book's about.

• 54:19Bobby Lee?

  I know, but what I'm saying is that it's not, it's not, that's gonna be different.

• 54:23Speaker 05

  Sure, if you want, yeah.

• 54:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:25Speaker 05

  It's about a guy named Chauncey Gardner.

• 54:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 54:29Speaker 05

  If that's what you want, fine.

• 54:31Bobby Lee?

  It's a little boy, like, kinda like Paris, Texas, he's kinda wandering.

• 54:35Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 54:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, but.

• 54:36Speaker 05

  I don't know Paris.

• 54:36Andrew Santino?

  Hey.

• 54:37Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 54:37Andrew Santino?

  Why are you doing that?

• 54:38Bobby Lee?

  I don't know.

• 54:39Andrew Santino?

  Just let him have the book.

• 54:40Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:40Andrew Santino?

  You trying to shoehorn some other fucking story into it?

• 54:43Speaker 05

  I mean, it's fine.

• 54:44Andrew Santino?

  It drives me nuts.

• 54:45Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 54:45Bobby Lee?

  I was trying to sound intelligent.

• 54:47Andrew Santino?

  It's not working.

• 54:49Andrew Santino?

  It's not.

• 54:50Bobby Lee?

  It's not.

• 54:50Andrew Santino?

  Stop it.

• 54:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. If I, now, audiobook, why, is there an audiobook?

• 54:55Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 54:55Bobby Lee?

  And are you doing the narration?

• 54:56Speaker 05

  I read it, yeah.

• 54:57Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's great, that's, I'll listen.

• 54:58Andrew Santino?

  I find it very odd when people don't read it.

• 55:01Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 55:01Andrew Santino?

  That wrote it. You wrote, you wrote it, you read it.

• 55:04Speaker 05

  Well, I'm a performer, I perform, so I can do that. Some authors probably would have a hard time doing it. It's hard. It's like really hard, it takes a couple of weeks.

• 55:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but I mean, I think a lot of times we find, right, that like, like, look at Stephen King. Like, you know how bad Stephen King got off doing his reading? Do you know what I mean? Like, I think some of these guys, they love to write, but they're also like.

• 55:27Speaker 05

  It's weird.

• 55:28Andrew Santino?

  You wanna hear me talk about it?

• 55:29Speaker 05

  Well, it's weird when you read it because you're faced with what you wrote.

• 55:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 55:33Speaker 05

  So, and you have to read it with all the, you can't go like.

• 55:37Bobby Lee?

  Like, yeah.

• 55:38Speaker 05

  I kinda wanted to do a version, like a whole version, where I read it like, or like,

• 55:45Speaker 05

  or read it and like, oh, like this, or something, like a whole, the whole book in falsetto or something. Yeah.

• 55:51Andrew Santino?

  He's walking around the fucking farm.

• 55:52Speaker 05

  Yeah, he's walking around the farm. But anyway, yeah.

• 55:54Bobby Lee?

  But do you read it in paragraphs, like, and then you go cut, you cut it there and go?

• 55:58Speaker 05

  As far as you can go in one piece and then you keep, and also somebody's there to keep stopping you because you fuck up a lot.

• 56:04Bobby Lee?

  Alright.

• 56:04Speaker 05

  So you have somebody going, you got that wrong.

• 56:06Bobby Lee?

  It's tedious.

• 56:07Andrew Santino?

  Like when we do the movie, it's when we did the animated movie.

• 56:09Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 56:10Andrew Santino?

  We did an animated movie.

• 56:11Bobby Lee?

  Where you, where you give me notes. Where you give me notes.

• 56:13Andrew Santino?

  I give him notes. I do give him notes live.

• 56:16Bobby Lee?

  Every line, he goes, that's not how you say it.

• 56:19Andrew Santino?

  Well, cuz.

• 56:19Bobby Lee?

  And I'm like, what? He's like, well, and then you give me scenarios. Imagine this and this, and I go, okay, I get it.

• 56:24Andrew Santino?

  Well, try to have him say fakasha, it's fucking.

• 56:26Bobby Lee?

  Fakasha.

• 56:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, well, he got it there, because we worked on it for like a week.

• 56:29Bobby Lee?

  In your fucking face, dude.

• 56:30Andrew Santino?

  No, we play these two little creatures, but we're bouncing a lot, like we do on the show. We're bouncing, you know, it's like bouncing conversation and, and sometimes he'll be.

• 56:37Bobby Lee?

  Am I the worst?

• 56:38Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no.

• 56:39Bobby Lee?

  Be honest.

• 56:39Andrew Santino?

  No, you're wonderful.

• 56:40Bobby Lee?

  Am I the worst?

• 56:41Andrew Santino?

  No, but he's so good, but sometimes he'll be not in our conversation.

• 56:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 56:45Andrew Santino?

  Reading the characters if it's existing in another space. I'm like, we're doing it. It's you and me. It's you and me.

• 56:49Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 56:49Andrew Santino?

  But when I do say that, you do come back and you kill it. Am I wrong? No, thank you. Then we had to go do, we had to go do extra, and I left because I went separate. And he goes, how long did it take? And I go, dude, it's 40 minutes. You're in and out.

• 57:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 57:02Andrew Santino?

  He called me, he's like, took me two fucking hours.

• 57:06Andrew Santino?

  I was like, because I was gone.

• 57:07Bobby Lee?

  But you read it before, because I haven't read it, so I'm showing up and I'm like.

• 57:11Andrew Santino?

  I do not read it before.

• 57:12Bobby Lee?

  Oh, so you're good.

• 57:13Andrew Santino?

  No, it's just, I just, no, we just work differently.

• 57:17Speaker 05

  Yeah, that's like a neurological difference.

• 57:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it is. I just, we just, I just, yes, yes, it is. I just see things like that. Okay, with lines, with lines, do you have like a memory, like can you memorize lines real fast?

• 57:30Bobby Lee?

  No, it takes me days.

• 57:31Andrew Santino?

  Right. I can see it and do it right. I have this weird trick. I don't know why. I'm so lucky. But I've been someone that can just

• 57:37Speaker 05

  That's what your brain does.

• 57:38Andrew Santino?

  Eat it and I can throw it right back out.

• 57:40Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 57:40Andrew Santino?

  You know who they said used to do that? That was that Charlie Sheen. I don't know if you saw that documentary. We've talked about it because we love it. They used to say, John Cryer would go, this fucking guy would never rehearse, would be on time on the nose, be unprepared, and then look at it and go, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, okay. And get an entire two-page scene.

• 58:00Speaker 05

  Incredible.

• 58:01Andrew Santino?

  And not even, it's just his brain had that digestion and regurgitation.

• 58:04Speaker 05

  I used to just need like two rehearsals to know it.

• 58:09Andrew Santino?

  Two and then you got it.

• 58:10Speaker 05

  I need to, reading it, I'm just not, it's not getting in.

• 58:13Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 58:13Speaker 05

  But if I rec through it and kind of do this, two takes.

• 58:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 58:17Speaker 05

  Then I know it because I lived the scene.

• 58:20Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 58:21Bobby Lee?

  So you don't memorize it in the night before?

• 58:23Speaker 05

  That never did me any good.

• 58:24Andrew Santino?

  Me neither.

• 58:25Speaker 05

  It only stressed me out and it didn't do me any good.

• 58:27Andrew Santino?

  I was always bad at that. If I could do it in the morning, if I read it right before I went there and then I got one run through, I would be like, okay, I understand what I was, I understand what I didn't see because.

• 58:35Speaker 05

  Well, and you do it in pieces. So it's like when you're filming stuff, you just, you only have to worry about this one scene and you do it a bunch of times from all these different angles.

• 58:43Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 58:44Speaker 05

  And then you throw it away. It's gone. So you only have to worry about one thing at a time when you're filming stuff.

• 58:48Andrew Santino?

  Can I tell you my favorite scene from your show that to this day I watch all the time, like over and over?

• 58:54Bobby Lee?

  Is it the art rooms? That's my favorite scene. It's my favorite scene in the whole world.

• 58:58Andrew Santino?

  With you and Pam Adlon in the press button. It says press.

• 59:03Bobby Lee?

  It's the best scene, dude.

• 59:05Speaker 05

  I love that.

• 59:05Andrew Santino?

  Just be, here's, and let me, dude, and let me ask you, let me ask you something because I get nerded out on those scenes. I'll rewind a scene like.

• 59:13Speaker 05

  It's Jay, it's Jay, Big Jay Okerson's voice, if that's what you're gonna.

• 59:16Andrew Santino?

  It is?

• 59:17Bobby Lee?

  It is?

• 59:18Speaker 05

  Big Jay Okerson, yeah. Hope I'm not getting him in trouble.

• 59:21Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no, no.

• 59:21Speaker 05

  I mean, I've asked him to do it. I said, I wrote him and I said, can you please say this word? Like for, you know, to choose one like five times.

• 59:31Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 59:32Speaker 05

  Yeah. To your phone and text it to me and I'll send you a, you know, check for a SAG check.

• 59:37Andrew Santino?

  That's so great.

• 59:38Speaker 05

  He said, sure.

• 59:41Speaker 05

  And he did it, and it's in there.

• 59:43Andrew Santino?

  On the first, on the first take.

• 59:45Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 59:46Andrew Santino?

  Pam turns her shoulder and walks away.

• 59:47Speaker 05

  Yeah, she's just like, yeah.

• 59:49Andrew Santino?

  But is it, did she, is it an organic laugh that you can hear in the audio? I don't think, like, she laughs.

• 59:56Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 59:56Andrew Santino?

  As she walks away, but I don't think she meant to laugh.

• 59:59Speaker 05

  She doesn't really laugh, she kinda goes like, ooh, like, mm.

• 1:00:02Andrew Santino?

  She goes, okay. I heard her say, okay, she turned. Did you surprise, was it a surprise when she first heard it, or you guys had already?

• 1:00:09Speaker 05

  No, we knew what.

• 1:00:10Andrew Santino?

  Oh, God, it would've been so fucking funny if it was a surprise. I wanted it so bad to be, like, cause we, cause I, like, there's a scene, there's a scene that I've nerded out like this about that I'll loop is in Baskets.

• 1:00:22Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:00:22Andrew Santino?

  Um, and I know you could tell, he knows the scene, cause I've watched it a hundred fucking times. But Louis is drinking a Gatorade.

• 1:00:28Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 1:00:29Andrew Santino?

  Your scene, that scene, it's the exact same comedy feeling in my soul where I go, this is so fun, and they knew it was fun. Oh, dude.

• 1:00:36Speaker 05

  So I remember that they really well because, so when, when we set up Zach's show.

• 1:00:42Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:43Speaker 05

  Um, we had this meeting, me and him, and I don't remember who else was there. But, um, I started asking him about, we were just trying to decide what the show's about. And like, it was just Zach, a show for Zach, and I was working at FX. I had a show that was successful, and I said, I wanna make a different, another show. So they're like, alright, and, and I went to Zach first, cause nobody ever made me laugh that hard as Zach did. So anyway, when we sat and talked about what his show would be about, this is, we'd already made a deal, he's gonna have a show. Um, I was like, well, what if your fam, what if you have family in it, you know? And I, and, um, he, so we're talking about, I said, what's your mother, what about your mother, if you had a mother? And he goes, yeah, maybe. And I go, what's your mother really like?

• 1:01:25Speaker 05

  In real life? And he goes, she's always like, ah, Zach, what are you doing? And I, and I just said, your mother's Louis. And we all laughed and then there was this pause and I said, what if we get Louis Anderson by your mother? And he's like, why does that sound like such a good idea? Like it just was immediately like, what a crazy idea. But that's how it came about because I was making a flip joke. And then I was like, this is, I enjoyed this part of the work. I was like, I just got on the phone and said, get Louis Anderson on the phone. I don't know him that way. We've met in person a bunch of times, always liked him, but I didn't have a relationship with him. But I just said, get me Louis Anderson on the phone. A few minutes later, I get this call from Louis in his car and he goes, hi.

• 1:02:08Speaker 05

  I go, hi Louis, it's Louis CK, yeah. So I'm making a show for FX and Zach Galifianakis is the star of the show. We're doing a pilot. Okay. And I go, we have a part in it. It's a substantial part for you. The thing is, we want you to play Zach's mother. And I just hear the sound inside the car. And then he goes, I love it. Wow. And it felt like this, we didn't know what he would do. We gave him the job. There was no, nothing written and there was no, it was just that day we gave him the job. Made a deal, right? It was like, no, we're doing that. So I didn't know how it was going to work out and I didn't know what Zach, so Zach hired John Chrysler, Chrysler?

• 1:02:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Chrysler. What's wrong with me?

• 1:02:56Speaker 05

  Please look it up.

• 1:02:56Andrew Santino?

  Jonathan Chrysler, Chrysler. Yeah.

• 1:02:59Speaker 05

  Chrysler.

• 1:03:00Andrew Santino?

  Jonathan Chrysler, I don't know if I can say it.

• 1:03:02Speaker 05

  Jonathan Chrysler had done this show, Portlandia, which is one of my favorite things ever.

• 1:03:06Andrew Santino?

  It's awesome.

• 1:03:06Speaker 05

  Yeah. And he just had this way of setting up improv, setting up, setting this scene for two characters. He knew how to shoot it, how to get, how to shoot it well and how to just make it happen. So these guys just, I went, after this one meeting where we talked about everything, I kind of went away and let them make the show and then I showed up that day. And there's Louis Anderson in a dress. And I'm like, we're really doing this, huh? Wow. And I'm like, I don't know what, what is the character? What are you guys doing? And I sat and watched them shoot that scene, which just happened. There was nothing to it.

• 1:03:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:41Speaker 05

  They had something to argue about that he doesn't respect. He's being a clown.

• 1:03:45Andrew Santino?

  Right. And Martha, that was like an introduction from Martha.

• 1:03:48Speaker 05

  And then there was this obsession with this Gatorade. And when that moment happened, I remember it. I had just arrived a few minutes before with the Gatorade and that hits the spot. I was like, I was like, what are we doing? This is incredible. This is incredible. And Louis, and I got to really love Louis. We got to know each other much better.

• 1:04:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:08Speaker 05

  And then he won a fucking Emmy and it was such a glorious thing that Louis, because I loved him when I was a young comic and he's such a sweet and good guy.

• 1:04:18Bobby Lee?

  I used to open for him.

• 1:04:19Speaker 05

  Struggled with his health, you know? It was really sad when he, when he passed away. But, uh, but yeah, I was, it was one of my happiest moments of my career was him winning an Emmy.

• 1:04:30Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:04:30Speaker 05

  That was such a beautiful thing. Cause the way he did it, he, that character was fantastic throughout the season. Two seasons, great, fucking great.

• 1:04:40Andrew Santino?

  I was, I did a show on FX called Dave with Little Dicky. And when I was on the show, I was like in love with Baskets so much. And I was like, hey, I'll, I'll, I don't want to get paid. Like, can I just do a anything in the thing? I just was like, I'll do an anything, anything, any. And they were, and they were like, dude, you gotta stop asking. Like, cause I kept asking my agent, I was like, just tell them I'll fucking. They were like, they don't want.

• 1:05:03Bobby Lee?

  Does that work? If people, if, if, if talent asks?

• 1:05:05Andrew Santino?

  No, but they said they don't, they were like, they're not.

• 1:05:08Bobby Lee?

  Cause I've asked so many times, they're like, nah, it's not gonna happen.

• 1:05:11Andrew Santino?

  I was like, I don't even want lines. I just want to be in like a background of the Burger King. I want, I really wanted to be at the Burger King.

• 1:05:16Speaker 05

  Right.

• 1:05:17Andrew Santino?

  And I was like, just let me be in the thing. And they're like, they don't want like an actor, comic. They were like, they're not looking for that. You're not, you're in the wrong. I was like, no, I just want to be in the back.

• 1:05:24Speaker 05

  Yeah, no, you wouldn't have been right for it.

• 1:05:25Andrew Santino?

  I know. See, that's right. Right. He was like, no, you can't do it, dude.

• 1:05:30Bobby Lee?

  So when people go, like, my agents try to track projects.

• 1:05:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:35Bobby Lee?

  Like when the Crazy Rich Asians were happening, like, we're tracking this for you, we're putting your name in that past, you know? And it's like, it never, I couldn't even get an audition at the end of the day.

• 1:05:44Speaker 05

  No, yeah, it doesn't.

• 1:05:45Bobby Lee?

  None of that works.

• 1:05:46Speaker 05

  No, yeah.

• 1:05:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:47Speaker 05

  I mean, I think it's good if you're trying to be an actor. You go in for a lot of stuff because they remember you. You go, you just do the best version of you.

• 1:05:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:57Speaker 05

  At the audition, and then you just are memorable. It doesn't matter getting that part. You know, like, if you read something, you're like, that's not my kind of guy, and you try to be it, you're gonna suck. So you just do a weird, your version of it.

• 1:06:09Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 1:06:10Speaker 05

  And they'll go, uh, that guy was good. He's not, he can't do this, but that guy, and they'll remember. I mean, I've cast a lot of things in my past with people that I've seen in other stuff that are, that I've seen in, in stuff that I had them cast, you know, come in for.

• 1:06:24Bobby Lee?

  So go in for everything.

• 1:06:26Speaker 05

  Go in for everything and do any part you get.

• 1:06:28Bobby Lee?

  I say no.

• 1:06:29Speaker 05

  Because that's where, you know, agents don't get you work, no.

• 1:06:34Andrew Santino?

  No, they're terrible people.

• 1:06:35Bobby Lee?

  Worthless.

• 1:06:35Speaker 05

  I'm not, they're just, they are what they are.

• 1:06:37Andrew Santino?

  They're terrible people.

• 1:06:38Bobby Lee?

  They're terrible people.

• 1:06:39Andrew Santino?

  Absolutely worthless people. Some of the worst ever. They give some of the worst advice. They're snakes. They've set you up for something, and then when it goes bad, they're not there to back you up. They're the worst.

• 1:06:47Speaker 05

  I think they, I think they're just, they're just, uh.

• 1:06:50Andrew Santino?

  Terrible pigs.

• 1:06:51Speaker 05

  They're out of, they're, they're. They're out of their depth a little, or they're not in the, they're in the wrong business.

• 1:06:56Andrew Santino?

  I hate them. They're on the backs of us. They stink.

• 1:06:58Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:06:59Andrew Santino?

  I can't wait to fire mine. I'm done with the business forever, anyway.

• 1:07:02Bobby Lee?

  Whoa, dude.

• 1:07:03Speaker 05

  Why would you be done with the business?

• 1:07:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, me too.

• 1:07:06Andrew Santino?

  We're out, dude. This is.

• 1:07:08Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:07:08Andrew Santino?

  We're the last show in Hollywood. This is it. I think we're the last.

• 1:07:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:12Andrew Santino?

  This is it.

• 1:07:13Bobby Lee?

  It's over.

• 1:07:14Andrew Santino?

  It's dying. It's dying.

• 1:07:15Speaker 05

  Yeah, that's a shame.

• 1:07:17Bobby Lee?

  You do a movie.

• 1:07:19Andrew Santino?

  And the, and the book, by the way, is available literally everywhere. Please go, please buy.

• 1:07:23Speaker 05

  Yeah, it's like you can preorder it now on all the things, all the things.

• 1:07:27Andrew Santino?

  All the things, all the things.

• 1:07:28Speaker 05

  And it'll be out November 11th.

• 1:07:30Bobby Lee?

  November 11th, Ingram.

• 1:07:32Speaker 05

  Novel.

• 1:07:33Andrew Santino?

  It's the first one.

• 1:07:34Speaker 05

  Yeah, I wrote another one after that I'm still working on. I mean, I finished a draft of it. I'm.

• 1:07:38Andrew Santino?

  Did you get like a book deal where they give you a two book deal? You know, they do this thing. It's a weird, where they're like, give them a deal and then they, then they make people write another book, even if they didn't want.

• 1:07:47Speaker 05

  No, no, I didn't get any kind of deal like that. I just, I just, uh, wrote this one.

• 1:07:51Andrew Santino?

  Good.

• 1:07:51Speaker 05

  See what happened and I sent it out and this company, Ben Bella in Texas is publishing it. It's a little company.

• 1:07:57Andrew Santino?

  Ben Bella.

• 1:07:58Speaker 05

  Ben Bella.

• 1:07:59Andrew Santino?

  Did you find them? They found you.

• 1:08:00Speaker 05

  I got a book agent and he's a really smart guy and he found, uh, found them. He, he'd worked with them on other stuff. They don't do much fiction.

• 1:08:08Andrew Santino?

  Ah, wow.

• 1:08:09Speaker 05

  Uh, but it's, it's, it's distributed by Simon and Schuster. So that's, that's who sells it.

• 1:08:14Andrew Santino?

  Ooh.

• 1:08:15Speaker 05

  But I didn't get a book deal from them.

• 1:08:16Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 1:08:17Speaker 05

  It's like, I just, I didn't, I haven't been paid anything. I, I just wrote it and they're putting it out. We'll see what we make together, but I don't have an advance or anything.

• 1:08:25Andrew Santino?

  That's a good deal. We'll see what we make together.

• 1:08:26Speaker 05

  I like it that way. I don't like the thing of like, like when you, when I book on the road and stuff, agents like to get advances because they sound, you know.

• 1:08:35Bobby Lee?

  Hey, we got you the money.

• 1:08:36Speaker 05

  Yeah. But all you're doing is betting against yourself.

• 1:08:39Andrew Santino?

  Totally.

• 1:08:40Speaker 05

  The last thing you want to do is like, take a bunch of money from somebody and then you didn't do well. And then you're like, ha, ha, you know? I want people to sort of have a good experience of you. So.

• 1:08:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Cause you're a big crowd work guy clips. You were, you started crowd work clips.

• 1:08:56Speaker 05

  Yeah, that was my innovation.

• 1:08:57Andrew Santino?

  That was, that was Louis, big crowd work clip guy. You were the first on Tik Tok to do it as far as I'm concerned.

• 1:09:03Speaker 05

  That's right. That's right.

• 1:09:04Andrew Santino?

  I saw most of your.

• 1:09:05Speaker 05

  I just saw it. I saw it as a new way. And here I am. Thank God.

• 1:09:10Andrew Santino?

  I would love to see.

• 1:09:11Bobby Lee?

  Does that annoy you? Like these crowd work guys on doing clips on Tik Tok?

• 1:09:15Speaker 05

  I mean, it's the, they got what they got from it.

• 1:09:18Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's fine. It's, it's all part of the thing.

• 1:09:19Speaker 05

  It's fine. It works for them. Good for them. I don't care. I don't, as I love stand up, I don't enjoy watching that.

• 1:09:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:28Speaker 05

  Also, when I see friends of mine do it, it's like you're killing in the moment, but no one's gonna remember it.

• 1:09:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:35Speaker 05

  And you're not building anything. That's, but I have a different goal than them. They just wanna run their numbers up and they wanna get whatever.

• 1:09:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:41Speaker 05

  And also, a lot of people pleases them a lot. People really like it. Yeah, so if an audience, if someone's enjoying it, they're right.

• 1:09:48Andrew Santino?

  Yes.

• 1:09:49Speaker 05

  And the person who doesn't like it, it's just, it's none of their business. If you don't like something, it's none of your business, as long as somebody likes it. If nobody likes it forever, someone needs to, someone needs to talk to that.

• 1:10:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:10:02Speaker 05

  But you know what? If literally no one ever liked a comic ever doing anything, that'd be pretty fucking incredible. I don't wanna see this.

• 1:10:11Andrew Santino?

  That is cool.

• 1:10:12Speaker 05

  Like David Tell had this, I don't think he ever did it more than once that I saw. He said, if you tell somebody you have a small penis, if you tell a woman you have a small penis, she won't be interested. But if you tell her you have the smallest penis in the whole world, she's gonna wanna see it.

• 1:10:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. He's, he's one of my favorites.

• 1:10:35Speaker 05

  Great.

• 1:10:36Andrew Santino?

  It's unbelievable, that guy.

• 1:10:37Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 1:10:38Andrew Santino?

  Who's the guy, who's the guy that you, that you really have like a comedy crush on, that you're like, oh, I love the fucking way that that person works?

• 1:10:45Speaker 05

  Uh, these days?

• 1:10:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:48Speaker 05

  I mean, that used to be Zach for me. I used to put my head on the table and cry.

• 1:10:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:53Speaker 05

  Uh, Todd Glass has always made me laugh like that.

• 1:10:55Andrew Santino?

  So funny.

• 1:10:56Speaker 05

  Just fucking destroys me.

• 1:10:58Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:59Speaker 05

  Uh, Jim Norton, who I've been working with lately, just also really kills me.

• 1:11:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:03Speaker 05

  There's a lot of guys I really love. Um, but that kinda like, I can't believe it.

• 1:11:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:08Speaker 05

  Todd Glass, I mean, I, I don't know if it's okay to do other people's bits, but I'm.

• 1:11:12Andrew Santino?

  It's usually says Todd's bit.

• 1:11:13Speaker 05

  Naming him.

• 1:11:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:14Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:11:15Andrew Santino?

  Should we call him? We'll get approval?

• 1:11:17Speaker 05

  Yeah, he did this thing about, uh, um, the lady, a lady next to him on an airplane, it has Reese's cups, and she's taking one out, and she looks at him, looking at him, and she goes, "Do you want one?" And he goes, "I want both."

• 1:11:34Speaker 05

  And he did some clip, I don't know if you can find it, but it was during the pandemic. He did some fake commercial, I think, on maybe Instagram or something where he's showing you how you can pee outside.

• 1:11:47Speaker 05

  But he's, uh, he's, he puts a, just a bag, like a shopping, like a plastic bag over his head and he just stands near a bush and he just starts hissing his pants.

• 1:12:01Speaker 05

  Completely fucking nuts.

• 1:12:05Speaker 05

  So he, and I haven't seen him for a long time, but he's always been, he's always been a guy that destroys me.

• 1:12:12Andrew Santino?

  We love him.

• 1:12:12Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:12:13Andrew Santino?

  He was doing a bunch of fake cop bits that were very funny. Do you remember that little run he had for a while of like getting fake pulled over?

• 1:12:18Speaker 05

  He used to do a bit with breakaway glass bottles, uh, like fantasy of like breaking, so he'd be, well, it's him walking down the street with like a beer bottle and there's some teenage girls and one of them gives him like a typical teenage girl like ew.

• 1:12:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:32Speaker 05

  And he goes over and he breaks.

• 1:12:38Speaker 05

  Yeah, he was, he was pretty great.

• 1:12:40Andrew Santino?

  He's the one right now. All right. Look, the, the advice was good.

• 1:12:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I learned so much today. Lou, did you have fun here?

• 1:12:46Speaker 05

  Of course I did. It was really fun. I wanted to do the show because you guys have a great energy.

• 1:12:51Andrew Santino?

  It's fun.

• 1:12:52Speaker 05

  And I had a great time.

• 1:12:53Andrew Santino?

  Well, we, we, listen, we love.

• 1:12:55Speaker 05

  It's not gonna sell a single one of my books.

• 1:12:56Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, no, no, our fan, no, no, that's not true.

• 1:12:59Speaker 05

  We'll sell one.

• 1:12:59Bobby Lee?

  No, no, Ingram, Louis CK.

• 1:13:01Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no, he's right. It's not, that's not gonna.

• 1:13:03Speaker 05

  It's not gonna, but it doesn't matter.

• 1:13:04Bobby Lee?

  Five. Five people.

• 1:13:07Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:13:07Bobby Lee?

  Yep.

• 1:13:09Andrew Santino?

  Guys, please, please, uh, go, uh, purchase Ingram right now.

• 1:13:12Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:13:13Andrew Santino?

  Louis' first book. It would mean a lot to him. He, uh, asked us for a loan before the show. We were a little concerned.

• 1:13:20Bobby Lee?

  I'm being real. I mean, I, um.

• 1:13:25Bobby Lee?

  Dude, I'm-

• 1:13:25Andrew Santino?

  Thanks for being on the show, man. I appreciate it.

• 1:13:27Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no.

• 1:13:30Andrew Santino?

  Go ahead, do your gay bit. Do your little-

• 1:13:31Bobby Lee?

  Forget it, forget it.

• 1:13:32Andrew Santino?

  No, do your sensitive-

• 1:13:33Bobby Lee?

  No, I just think, I'm just a huge fan, dude.

• 1:13:35Andrew Santino?

  Thanks.

• 1:13:35Bobby Lee?

  I really am. I just think you're so great.

• 1:13:37Andrew Santino?

  Thank you. Well, you make me laugh a lot.

• 1:13:38Bobby Lee?

  Thank you, thank you.

• 1:13:42Bobby Lee?

  But, um, just having you on here was just fucking great.

• 1:13:45Andrew Santino?

  Thanks, man.

• 1:13:48Bobby Lee?

  Dude, why can't I-

• 1:13:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude, he's the best living comic-

• 1:13:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, okay, why can't I-

• 1:13:53Andrew Santino?

  Shut the fuck up. Shut up.

• 1:13:54Bobby Lee?

  Alright, no, no.

• 1:13:54Speaker 05

  Thank you for being a bad friend.

• 1:14:21Speaker 00

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