Sick In Japan

Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Shopify, Hello Fresh, Bluechew & ZocDoc • Shopify: Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/badfriends • HelloFresh: Get up to 10 FREE meals and a free high protein item for life at https://HelloFresh.com/badfriends10fm • Bluechew: Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://bluechew.com ! • ZocDoc: Stop putting off those doctors appointments and go to https://Zocdoc.com/BADFRIENDS to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Illegal Koreans 6:00 Picking Cotton 10:00 Mr. Lee's Mysteries 14:00 Rabbit Killer 18:30 90s Music Are Oldies Now? 25:00 Writing a Bob Dylan Song 28:30 Bombing In Front of My Hero! 35:00 The Human Shield 40:00 Date Night With Emma Watson 46:30 Dax Flame Finds Love 52:00 Sick in Japan 1:04:00 Do I Smell Bad? More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Juicy Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/?hl=en More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@SOSVHS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This episode contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ads Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:45Andrew Santino?

  Hey, bad friends! I have only two cities left on my tour before I film my special. This weekend, Boston, Massachusetts. Boston, I love you so much, you've always done me right. I have four shows at the Wilbur in Boston this weekend. Bring your loves out for Valentine's Day. Then, February 21 and 22, Minneapolis. Let's go, baby, I'm shooting my special for Hulu in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Come see me, go to andrewsantino.com for those tickets. AndrewSantino.com.

• 1:11Bobby Lee?

  Hello.

• 1:12Andrew Santino?

  Hello.

• 1:12Bobby Lee?

  Hello, Mike. It's me, Benj St. Tost. Hello.

• 1:16Andrew Santino?

  And who are you?

• 1:16Bobby Lee?

  I'm Squeaky the Pete.

• 1:17Andrew Santino?

  Squeaky the Pete!

• 1:19Bobby Lee?

  Hello.

• 1:19Andrew Santino?

  Boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen, you waited for it, you wanted. We're coming to London and Dublin.

• 1:24Bobby Lee?

  We are, we're coming, dude.

• 1:26Andrew Santino?

  Tomorrow, pre-sale for the artist starts tomorrow. The code is BADFRIENDS. We're gonna be in London and Dublin, July 18th and 19th. 18th and 19th, we'll be there.

• 1:36Bobby Lee?

  You gotta come, because we may not come for a while after that.

• 1:39Andrew Santino?

  We may not come for a while after that. London and Dublin, we're coming to see you, we're so excited. Artist pre-sale starts tomorrow, the code is BADFRIENDS, and then it's on sale to the public on Friday, February 14th. Get the artist pre-sale ticket so they don't jack up the prices, everyone on the internet. Go get them.

• 1:52Bobby Lee?

  Go get it!

• 1:53Andrew Santino?

  Code is BADFRIENDS.

• 2:02Speaker 03

  You're disgusting. Oh, you two are something. We're bad friends.

• 2:07Bobby Lee?

  Oh, oh, it's so good.

• 2:13Bobby Lee?

  It's so good to be free and an American.

• 2:17Andrew Santino?

  American, America, I love you. Did you see the protest this morning in San Diego?

• 2:25Bobby Lee?

  That's what I love about America. We can protest. What was it about?

• 2:31Andrew Santino?

  They were they were mad at ICE.

• 2:33Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah. And oh, dude, and then tomorrow. Hey, are you gonna not work tomorrow? Carlos?

• 2:40Speaker 04

  Oh, because y'all because of the protest against DEI?

• 2:43Bobby Lee?

  No, no, tomorrow.

• 2:44Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 2:45Bobby Lee?

  They're doing Hispanics are gonna do a no work day.

• 2:49Andrew Santino?

  So what do you mean? It's like every day for them?

• 2:52Bobby Lee?

  Exactly. No, but you better not be working tomorrow, dude.

• 2:55Speaker 04

  I have to be here.

• 2:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he has to work tomorrow.

• 2:57Bobby Lee?

  Oh, my God, he's a traitor.

• 2:59Andrew Santino?

  Traitor.

• 3:00Speaker 04

  No, I'm working.

• 3:03Speaker 04

  I'm legal. I'm legal.

• 3:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 3:04Bobby Lee?

  No, yeah, the people that are legal are also protesting for their people.

• 3:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, don't you get it?

• 3:08Speaker 04

  I asked about my maid in Houston, and apparently she's fine.

• 3:13Speaker 04

  She's illegal.

• 3:14Bobby Lee?

  Well, that's good.

• 3:14Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:15Bobby Lee?

  Juanita's fine?

• 3:15Speaker 04

  No, Marina.

• 3:16Bobby Lee?

  Okay, let's say, listen, I want to say something upfront, if I may, that's wrong.

• 3:22Andrew Santino?

  That's wrong.

• 3:22Bobby Lee?

  And if one day we're gonna have a Korean protest. Yeah, yeah.

• 3:26Andrew Santino?

  For what?

• 3:27Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 3:27Andrew Santino?

  What's the protest?

• 3:28Bobby Lee?

  No more. We're not gonna make bibimbap for a day.

• 3:31Andrew Santino?

  Well, what will we do without bibimbap?

• 3:34Bobby Lee?

  You know what we're also gonna do? We're gonna dig back our kimchi up from the ground.

• 3:37Andrew Santino?

  Unvariet?

• 3:38Bobby Lee?

  So they don't ferment for one day, dude.

• 3:40Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 3:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 3:41Andrew Santino?

  I don't like that.

• 3:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I know, dude. You want them to ferment.

• 3:43Andrew Santino?

  I like kimchi a lot.

• 3:44Bobby Lee?

  Right? Also, those girls at the karaoke, they're not working.

• 3:48Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 3:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, dude. Those what are those glass girls? What do they call them?

• 3:52Andrew Santino?

  Grass girls?

• 3:54Bobby Lee?

  What do they call them?

• 3:55Andrew Santino?

  I don't know, but let me say this. Donald Trump, please don't get rid of Koreans. Like, we please. Mexicans are fine. Get rid of them.

• 4:03Bobby Lee?

  Get rid of our how about the ones that came over here illegally?

• 4:06Andrew Santino?

  Koreans?

• 4:07Bobby Lee?

  Koreans, yeah.

• 4:08Andrew Santino?

  Do Koreans come over here illegally?

• 4:09Bobby Lee?

  No, we follow the rules.

• 4:12Bobby Lee?

  We're law-abiding.

• 4:13Andrew Santino?

  I gotta say something wild. The woman who cleans the house sometimes.

• 4:17Bobby Lee?

  Your house?

• 4:17Andrew Santino?

  I got scared because I thought, what if she is she gonna get gone? And then I asked her and I said, I said, hey, you know, if, you know, if I gotta blow the whistle, you know, what do I do?

• 4:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. I did.

• 4:32Andrew Santino?

  And she said, I'm from New Mexico. And I was like, what?

• 4:37Bobby Lee?

  Really?

• 4:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, she's from Albuquerque.

• 4:39Bobby Lee?

  You have accent?

• 4:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's so thick. I had no idea.

• 4:41Bobby Lee?

  Well, then she's lying.

• 4:43Andrew Santino?

  I do.

• 4:43Bobby Lee?

  She's a lying bastard.

• 4:44Andrew Santino?

  Okay, you be me and I'll be here. I'll show you how it went.

• 4:46Bobby Lee?

  I'm you?

• 4:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 4:47Bobby Lee?

  Good morning. Well, um. Hey, uh. Juanita?

• 4:53Andrew Santino?

  Her name's, just say Maria.

• 4:54Bobby Lee?

  I'm sorry. Hey, Maria.

• 4:55Andrew Santino?

  Oh, hi, Mr. Andrew.

• 4:58Bobby Lee?

  You know, I'm very concerned about what's going on with the Trump thing and stuff.

• 5:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah?

• 5:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, so, um, anything I can do to help, you know?

• 5:05Andrew Santino?

  Hmm, maybe more money first.

• 5:09Bobby Lee?

  Wait, where are you from? You're from Mexico, right?

• 5:11Andrew Santino?

  Albuquerque.

• 5:13Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you know John Jones?

• 5:15Andrew Santino?

  Of course.

• 5:18Andrew Santino?

  I did, I did, I do love her so much. What would I do? I said she could live at our house.

• 5:22Bobby Lee?

  Mine?

• 5:22Andrew Santino?

  Live with us.

• 5:23Bobby Lee?

  Last week?

• 5:24Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 5:24Bobby Lee?

  I gave her, so I Venmo'd the money.

• 5:27Andrew Santino?

  You don't give her cash?

• 5:28Bobby Lee?

  No, Venmo.

• 5:28Andrew Santino?

  Gotta give him cash.

• 5:29Bobby Lee?

  Which, what, look what I did though.

• 5:30Andrew Santino?

  Cause they gotta pay taxes on that.

• 5:31Bobby Lee?

  I gave her 200 cash on top of the money.

• 5:34Andrew Santino?

  Ooh.

• 5:34Bobby Lee?

  Cause I never thought we were gonna see her again.

• 5:37Andrew Santino?

  That's it?

• 5:37Bobby Lee?

  I swear to God.

• 5:38Andrew Santino?

  $200?

• 5:39Bobby Lee?

  Well, I just, like, it was like, Mike, like, hey, thanks for all the laughs.

• 5:44Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? Because, you know, I make fun of her when she's, you know what I mean?

• 5:46Andrew Santino?

  I get it.

• 5:47Bobby Lee?

  So I just went, you know, señorita here. I don't, I don't know her name, but I go.

• 5:51Andrew Santino?

  You don't know her name?

• 5:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I do. I don't wanna say it though.

• 5:53Andrew Santino?

  This woman is like the love of my, I love her. She's honestly like a member of my family.

• 5:57Bobby Lee?

  Do you, do you play games with yours?

• 5:58Andrew Santino?

  All the time. I, we play hide and seek.

• 6:00Bobby Lee?

  No, not those kinda games.

• 6:02Andrew Santino?

  And she never comes and finds me.

• 6:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah?

• 6:05Andrew Santino?

  She just goes to work.

• 6:06Bobby Lee?

  I go Marco. And they go, Polo.

• 6:10Andrew Santino?

  Foyo.

• 6:10Bobby Lee?

  Foyo.

• 6:11Andrew Santino?

  Foyo. Marco.

• 6:12Bobby Lee?

  Foyo.

• 6:15Bobby Lee?

  But, uh.

• 6:15Andrew Santino?

  Say this, Trump, come on.

• 6:17Bobby Lee?

  Do it.

• 6:17Andrew Santino?

  Leave the Koreans alone. Leave the Koreans alone.

• 6:20Bobby Lee?

  Also, leave the Mexicans alone.

• 6:22Andrew Santino?

  Nah, get them out of here!

• 6:24Bobby Lee?

  Because now, check it out, dude, who's gonna do those jobs? No, you're not strawberry. Oh, yeah, you look like you pick strawberries.

• 6:30Andrew Santino?

  Strawberry boy.

• 6:31Bobby Lee?

  Love strawberries, yeah.

• 6:31Andrew Santino?

  I'd eat so much.

• 6:32Bobby Lee?

  What would I, could I, you think I could pick cotton?

• 6:36Bobby Lee?

  Do you think I could?

• 6:37Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 6:37Bobby Lee?

  How many little swabs? I don't know how it works. You go swab by swab?

• 6:41Andrew Santino?

  It's swab by swab.

• 6:42Bobby Lee?

  Is it a puff? What do you call it?

• 6:44Andrew Santino?

  Up, up, up. That's a good.

• 6:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, how do you do it? Do you use a skith?

• 6:48Andrew Santino?

  No, do they do by hand? A skith? Is that a real word?

• 6:51Bobby Lee?

  In Stardew Valley, we use skith.

• 6:53Andrew Santino?

  Oh, skith.

• 6:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, to get wheat.

• 6:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, you mean like a sickle?

• 6:56Bobby Lee?

  Is it called a sickle or a skith?

• 6:58Andrew Santino?

  Sickles.

• 6:58Bobby Lee?

  Okay, what's a skith then?

• 7:01Andrew Santino?

  Dude, I hope to God that you've read sickle as skith.

• 7:04Bobby Lee?

  I think there's a skith, dude. If I, I'll kill myself.

• 7:06Andrew Santino?

  I'm not gonna say you're wrong.

• 7:07Bobby Lee?

  I've been seeing skith three years, dude, because it's Stardew.

• 7:09Andrew Santino?

  Is it skith? I know what a sickle is.

• 7:11Bobby Lee?

  It's got a curve to it.

• 7:12Andrew Santino?

  That's a sickle.

• 7:13Bobby Lee?

  Like a Grim Reaper.

• 7:14Andrew Santino?

  That's a sickle.

• 7:15Bobby Lee?

  That's not a sickle, it's a skith.

• 7:16Andrew Santino?

  That's a skith? No, a sickle is a handheld.

• 7:20Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 7:20Andrew Santino?

  Hammer and a sickle.

• 7:21Bobby Lee?

  Skith is that, dude, with the hook.

• 7:22Andrew Santino?

  Skith.

• 7:23Bobby Lee?

  Right, that's a skith.

• 7:24Andrew Santino?

  Okay, what's a sickle?

• 7:25Bobby Lee?

  Ah, for once I'm right, bastard! You dumb-doms!

• 7:30Andrew Santino?

  I'm shocked.

• 7:30Bobby Lee?

  You're all dumb-doms, dude!

• 7:31Andrew Santino?

  Slow down there.

• 7:32Bobby Lee?

  All right. For once I'm right.

• 7:33Andrew Santino?

  It's almost the exact same thing.

• 7:35Bobby Lee?

  Right, a sickle?

• 7:36Andrew Santino?

  A skith is just a longer-handed.

• 7:38Bobby Lee?

  Exactly. You don't use a sickle when you cut cotton?

• 7:41Andrew Santino?

  You don't use a skith either, you fuckhead!

• 7:44Bobby Lee?

  I do!

• 7:45Andrew Santino?

  You don't!

• 7:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I get the ones far.

• 7:47Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 7:48Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? I pick the ones close and I get the ones far, dude.

• 7:50Andrew Santino?

  Cotton is just by hand, right? It's just pick, pick, pick.

• 7:52Bobby Lee?

  Oh my God. Can I wear gloves?

• 7:55Andrew Santino?

  I don't think so. I think that's part of it. I think.

• 7:57Bobby Lee?

  I can? You know what I would use? Those gloves that they use in the football games, the gigantic, like, finger ones?

• 8:04Andrew Santino?

  Number one?

• 8:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 8:05Andrew Santino?

  How do they pick cotton today? I do wanna know. I actually don't know. It's gotta be a big machine. A big machine that forks it up, right? Today, cotton is almost exclusively picked by using large machines called cotton pickers, which

• 8:17Bobby Lee?

  Exactly.

• 8:17Andrew Santino?

  Sounds racist.

• 8:22Bobby Lee?

  But dude, you know what?

• 8:23Andrew Santino?

  Whoa, little white boy, get away from that cotton picker!

• 8:27Bobby Lee?

  But back in the day, do you think, in the 1800s, you think you wouldn't have been able to do it?

• 8:31Andrew Santino?

  No way!

• 8:32Bobby Lee?

  We would?

• 8:33Andrew Santino?

  You and me, we'd fold immediately.

• 8:35Bobby Lee?

  You know, but you know.

• 8:35Andrew Santino?

  My back would hurt, you would be sweating.

• 8:37Bobby Lee?

  I would be singing. Swing a. Swing a loo. Sweeter. Cherry.

• 8:48Bobby Lee?

  Dude, you'd be singing with me.

• 8:49Andrew Santino?

  That's the movie we should make.

• 8:50Bobby Lee?

  Dude, you gotta do the Irish song.

• 8:51Andrew Santino?

  You and I in the.

• 8:52Bobby Lee?

  Irish accent.

• 8:55Bobby Lee?

  Let me start.

• 8:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 8:56Bobby Lee?

  Swing a loo. Sweeter. Cherry.

• 9:03Andrew Santino?

  Dude, we would get nothing done.

• 9:04Bobby Lee?

  We'd get nothing done.

• 9:05Andrew Santino?

  And then you would smoke and light a field on fire on accident.

• 9:08Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 9:08Andrew Santino?

  We would get fired.

• 9:09Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 9:10Andrew Santino?

  Well, it's interesting. They never got little people to do cotton paint because it's so low to the ground. You don't have to bend over.

• 9:14Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's good.

• 9:15Andrew Santino?

  You send them out.

• 9:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 9:16Andrew Santino?

  Go, go, go, go, go.

• 9:17Bobby Lee?

  Go, go, go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That'd be great.

• 9:18Andrew Santino?

  It's crazy. We could never, we would never last if we weren't in this. Do you realize if we weren't living right now, you and I would be fucked?

• 9:23Bobby Lee?

  That's, you know, you know, when people say that, and I argue against it.

• 9:26Andrew Santino?

  What would we do in another time?

• 9:28Bobby Lee?

  Because I'm gonna say something, okay? I'm the way I am is because of the environment that I'm in. Hear me out there. No, I mean, you laugh at me, you mock me, dude, but I'm gonna tell you something right now. You know, I just do what's necessary.

• 9:41Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 9:41Bobby Lee?

  Yes. I do what's, I've always done what's necessary. Bare minimum. Yeah, but this survival, right? Yeah. Right? So back then, I would do the bare minimum, but I would still be able to survive and eat and all that stuff. So I would work.

• 9:55Andrew Santino?

  You think so? Because a lot of people went and starved to death because they did the bare minimum. If you couldn't contribute, you were gone. You were dead. Bare minimum today, you get away with anything you want.

• 10:05Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 10:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

• 10:08Bobby Lee?

  No, no, keep saying?

• 10:09Andrew Santino?

  Because, because bare minimum today, just you can get by, but you have so many resources. Back then, what would you do to get food? You're not going to hunt.

• 10:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but I would have, I would have developed a different skill set.

• 10:21Andrew Santino?

  What do you think your skill set would have been? That's my point.

• 10:23Bobby Lee?

  I would be, omelets.

• 10:26Andrew Santino?

  Omelet station.

• 10:27Bobby Lee?

  No, no, what I'm saying is I would probably make, came out wrong.

• 10:30Andrew Santino?

  These days with the price of eggs?

• 10:31Bobby Lee?

  I, no, I would, I would have figured something else out. I would also done like maybe prostitution.

• 10:37Andrew Santino?

  So you'd hook yourself out?

• 10:38Bobby Lee?

  I would do something that's gonna be, or you know, I know what I would do. Opium then. I would do something kind of borderline illegal.

• 10:43Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 10:44Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? Right this way, Mr. John. You know what I mean? And I would sit down, right? And I would supply, I'd have that supply chain going.

• 10:51Andrew Santino?

  Okay, well, that, that's not the minimum. That's good. That's a lot, that's good work ethic.

• 10:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it would say Mr. Lee's.

• 10:56Andrew Santino?

  Mr. Reese.

• 10:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, Mr. Reese. I just, I see the fucking font.

• 10:59Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I see it now.

• 11:00Bobby Lee?

  I see the lights.

• 11:01Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 11:01Bobby Lee?

  It's like Vegas. Yes. Mr. Reese, right? Premium opium.

• 11:08Bobby Lee?

  Right? Discount flight.

• 11:10Andrew Santino?

  Wait, why?

• 11:10Bobby Lee?

  I just get people in.

• 11:12Andrew Santino?

  Get them in.

• 11:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 11:13Andrew Santino?

  Get the bodies in there.

• 11:14Bobby Lee?

  And I would say no, you know, the other. Who's not allowed.

• 11:18Andrew Santino?

  Got it. I get it.

• 11:19Bobby Lee?

  Like, guess who?

• 11:19Andrew Santino?

  Well, no hats, no loose fitting clothes.

• 11:21Bobby Lee?

  No, those are people.

• 11:22Andrew Santino?

  Oh, okay.

• 11:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, no what?

• 11:23Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, no Timberland boots. I know what you're.

• 11:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. No FUBU. I'm gonna have different things in there, right? That's gonna like make my, your store shine.

• 11:34Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 11:35Bobby Lee?

  Foot massages.

• 11:36Andrew Santino?

  They got that?

• 11:36Bobby Lee?

  I know, I know, but I'll do other things like, um, Brazilian wax.

• 11:40Andrew Santino?

  This is all going back.

• 11:41Bobby Lee?

  Red eyebrows.

• 11:42Andrew Santino?

  You're selling your body.

• 11:43Bobby Lee?

  Manicures. Yeah, yeah, I'll stick, sit on your dick.

• 11:46Andrew Santino?

  Right. This is all, you a hooker. This is you. This all is just a front for you being a hooker.

• 11:50Bobby Lee?

  No, it's not. No, it's not.

• 11:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 11:52Bobby Lee?

  That's last case.

• 11:54Andrew Santino?

  That's first case.

• 11:55Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 11:55Andrew Santino?

  Case closed.

• 11:56Bobby Lee?

  First of all, have you ever tried to have sex when you're on opium?

• 11:59Andrew Santino?

  Have you?

• 12:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's impossible.

• 12:02Andrew Santino?

  I, I'll have this. I've had, I've tried to have sex on opia- opioids. Yeah.

• 12:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's hard. Even opioids, it's hard.

• 12:08Andrew Santino?

  You can't get hard. It's hard.

• 12:09Bobby Lee?

  It's hard to get hard.

• 12:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's hard to get hard.

• 12:10Bobby Lee?

  So I would like, if, if some white burly guy was like jacked up on my premium opium, like straight from like, you know what I mean, the opium, opium.

• 12:20Andrew Santino?

  Right from the opium.

• 12:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, right from the opium, straight from the tap.

• 12:23Andrew Santino?

  Right from it.

• 12:23Bobby Lee?

  Right? And they're still able to go, hey, man, let me, get your butt over here, you know what I mean? I would be like, oh, fuck, this one I have to do.

• 12:31Andrew Santino?

  Gotta do it.

• 12:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 12:32Andrew Santino?

  I saw a TikTok video the other day. There's people just posting how to make cocaine on TikTok. Do you know this?

• 12:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I wouldn't know.

• 12:39Andrew Santino?

  They put it behind different kinds of music, but there was like guys that were, it was just like, with music and he was just showing like the coca leaves in the barrel and all that stuff.

• 12:47Bobby Lee?

  Now, coca leaves are different than cacao.

• 12:49Andrew Santino?

  Cacao is chocolate.

• 12:50Bobby Lee?

  Chocolate, right?

• 12:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 12:51Bobby Lee?

  Okay, good.

• 12:52Andrew Santino?

  No, but they're, but, but they're cousins.

• 12:54Bobby Lee?

  Really?

• 12:55Andrew Santino?

  Chocolate and coca, coca, cocaine, coca leaves and coca chocolate, I think are like cousin plants.

• 13:01Bobby Lee?

  Really?

• 13:02Andrew Santino?

  I think so.

• 13:03Bobby Lee?

  Cacao and co- like cocaine leaves?

• 13:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, because it's.

• 13:07Bobby Lee?

  And cacao leaves?

• 13:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, coca, the plant.

• 13:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 13:10Andrew Santino?

  It's worldwide psychoactive alkaloid cocaine.

• 13:13Bobby Lee?

  So if I, let's, first of all.

• 13:16Andrew Santino?

  And then chocolate plant is, is the coca plant, right?

• 13:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but like before there was cocaine, if you and I were living in that time and you, you and I.

• 13:23Andrew Santino?

  How? Oh, sorry.

• 13:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we, we were wanderers, right?

• 13:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 13:27Bobby Lee?

  We're just wanderer, you and I, nomads.

• 13:29Andrew Santino?

  Nomad.

• 13:29Bobby Lee?

  And we saw that leaf, we wouldn't know what to do with it.

• 13:33Andrew Santino?

  Well, they started chewing on it. That's how they found out the powers of it. They chewed on it and it gave them energy.

• 13:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but then who was like, oh, this may be great in a powder and up my nose. Like who's came up with that?

• 13:41Andrew Santino?

  Who started cocaine?

• 13:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 13:42Speaker 04

  Mexicans.

• 13:43Andrew Santino?

  And how?

• 13:44Bobby Lee?

  How? Why would you think that you could do that?

• 13:46Andrew Santino?

  Like, here's what we're saying, right?

• 13:49Andrew Santino?

  Albert Neiman isolated an active ingredient called coca leaves, which he named cocaine. Well, that's like I found out, you know how, you know how microwaves were invented?

• 13:55Bobby Lee?

  Oh, shit, teach me.

• 13:56Andrew Santino?

  There was a guy who had a bar of chocolate in his pocket and he was working near a, a, a, a radiator, a radioactive radiator or whatever. And it melted, like, because he was standing next to it and he was like, oh shit.

• 14:10Bobby Lee?

  Are you being real right now?

• 14:11Andrew Santino?

  Look it up.

• 14:11Bobby Lee?

  I thought you made that up.

• 14:12Andrew Santino?

  Look it up, how microwave, watch the first microwave. It was a guy, he had a fucking bar of chocolate in his pocket. And he, it melted because he was too close to this radiator or whatever that's called. I'm saying it wrong. American engineer Percy Spencer, Spencer was working with a radar set when he noticed a candy bar in his pocket had melted. He discovered the magnetron tube and the radar set was emitting microwaves that generated heat, melting the bar of chocolate in his pocket. That's how fucking dumb we are. We find all this shit on accident.

• 14:35Bobby Lee?

  Accident.

• 14:36Andrew Santino?

  So all accident.

• 14:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, in therapy, ah, this is so shameful. I've never shared this before.

• 14:41Andrew Santino?

  No, you have to.

• 14:42Bobby Lee?

  But.

• 14:45Bobby Lee?

  I did something in third grade.

• 14:50Bobby Lee?

  About the microwave. Anyway, can I, I was living in Minnesota. And there was a girl that lived next to me and there was a rumor that she put a rabbit in a microwave. Yeah. And it exploded.

• 15:02Andrew Santino?

  A pet rabbit?

• 15:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and I, when I found the rumor, right? I was so mad. I mean, I never met a rabbit. But I was, I just remember as a kid going, fucking, fucking explore rabbits, man?

• 15:16Andrew Santino?

  Can't do that.

• 15:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. That's fucking bullshit, man.

• 15:18Andrew Santino?

  Bad.

• 15:19Bobby Lee?

  Right? So I would, every time she would walk by in class, I would go, rabbit killer. And she didn't do it.

• 15:26Andrew Santino?

  Well, I'd be used to it.

• 15:26Bobby Lee?

  It was just a rumor.

• 15:27Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 15:28Bobby Lee?

  And one time she cried. In class.

• 15:31Andrew Santino?

  Cause you kept calling her rabbit?

• 15:32Bobby Lee?

  Rabbit killer, yeah, yeah. And then the teacher brought me on, in front of the class. And sat me down in a chair in front of the whole class and goes, you're short, you know what I mean? You're little.

• 15:43Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 15:43Bobby Lee?

  How does that feel? Like he was belittling me in front of the class. Because I was making, and I started to cry.

• 15:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 15:50Bobby Lee?

  It taught me, taught me a really big lesson. Here's the lesson. Even if it's a rumor, you don't say shit, Dan.

• 15:57Andrew Santino?

  Keep it to yourself.

• 15:57Bobby Lee?

  Keep it to yourself.

• 15:58Andrew Santino?

  Also.

• 15:59Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 15:59Andrew Santino?

  Also, that teacher.

• 16:02Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 16:02Andrew Santino?

  We gotta get that guy.

• 16:04Bobby Lee?

  We do.

• 16:05Andrew Santino?

  Where the fuck is he?

• 16:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 16:06Andrew Santino?

  Belittling my friend in front of people?

• 16:08Bobby Lee?

  Did, that makes you mad?

• 16:08Andrew Santino?

  That pisses me off. I wouldn't put up with that shit.

• 16:11Bobby Lee?

  Really?

• 16:12Andrew Santino?

  Leave him alone!

• 16:13Bobby Lee?

  You would have said that in class?

• 16:14Andrew Santino?

  I would have been so mad if somebody belittled my friend in class.

• 16:17Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah. I, I think now you can do it. I've seen TikTok videos where students talk back.

• 16:23Andrew Santino?

  The one kid is my favorite. That's like, instead of you, you ought to be.

• 16:26Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, I love that guy.

• 16:26Andrew Santino?

  I love that kid.

• 16:27Bobby Lee?

  I love that guy, yeah, yeah. Instead of, yeah.

• 16:28Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, well, he's like.

• 16:29Bobby Lee?

  Well, no, no, you make it up to me.

• 16:31Andrew Santino?

  It's like.

• 16:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you, you know, you know, you know Charles? Charles, you know, I, I, you don't, you don't pay attention in class, right? And you're, you're not putting your essays in early.

• 16:42Andrew Santino?

  You wonder why kids are failing.

• 16:43Bobby Lee?

  Hold on, hold on, hold on.

• 16:44Andrew Santino?

  You wonder why kids are failing.

• 16:45Bobby Lee?

  Let me get that over again. I'm not a good teacher. You skip a few classes, you don't remember.

• 16:51Bobby Lee?

  So Charles.

• 16:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 16:52Bobby Lee?

  You know, I'm, you know, I'm tired of your attitude. You come to class late, right? You don't seem to like, be interested in your book work. Right? And your essays are all over the place. I mean, what is going on, Plow, pal?

• 17:06Andrew Santino?

  You know, you don't really care about us as youth. You don't invest in us. You don't care about our issues and what we care about. All you want to do is get a paycheck and that's disappointing to me. And maybe if you showed a little bit more love to the students and cared about our world and what was important to us, maybe, just maybe, we create a better environment and a better future.

• 17:24Bobby Lee?

  That's so good. You don't even have to look that up. That was good, dude. I would never be able to do that.

• 17:28Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you would.

• 17:29Bobby Lee?

  No, there's no way.

• 17:30Andrew Santino?

  Do yours.

• 17:31Bobby Lee?

  I can't do it, dude. There's no way. I can't even. Alright, try.

• 17:36Andrew Santino?

  Kevin? Kevin?

• 17:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah?

• 17:39Andrew Santino?

  You don't pay attention.

• 17:40Bobby Lee?

  What's up?

• 17:40Andrew Santino?

  And your essays are late and I want to know who you think you are, screwing up my class, not paying attention, and goofing off.

• 17:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that's what I'm talking about, man. Your generation, your algorithms, your superiority, man. Us kids, we just want to learn by tactile approach. By touching, feeling, right? Learning through our own physical experiences, man. There's other ways that we can learn, you know, not just analytical.

• 18:02Andrew Santino?

  Well, you're failing.

• 18:03Bobby Lee?

  Exactly, but if you taught me the right way, with love and empathy, right? I'd be able to absorb the information, maybe.

• 18:09Andrew Santino?

  That's very good.

• 18:11Bobby Lee?

  But the beginning, the algorithm part, I-

• 18:13Andrew Santino?

  No, that part was-

• 18:15Bobby Lee?

  I didn't know what I was doing there.

• 18:16Andrew Santino?

  I don't even know how to look that up, but that kid was so powerful.

• 18:18Bobby Lee?

  That kid was-

• 18:18Andrew Santino?

  Such a great speech.

• 18:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 18:19Andrew Santino?

  I could have never snapped back at a teacher. We never did that.

• 18:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 18:22Andrew Santino?

  We never did that. We got in, dude, we got in so much trouble all the time. You couldn't say shit back. You couldn't go to the bathroom. If you go to the bathroom, you're fucked. I have to go to the bathroom, too bad. Well, I'm gonna go. Well, you're gonna-

• 18:33Bobby Lee?

  I'm a student, ready?

• 18:34Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 18:34Bobby Lee?

  You're a teacher. Mr. Stevenson.

• 18:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 18:38Bobby Lee?

  You know, I don't know what bathroom to use. Because I don't feel comfortable in the men's bathroom, even though I was born male. Right? But they're like, you know, I get stares when I go to the women's bathrooms. We gotta do something as a school.

• 18:51Andrew Santino?

  Stand up.

• 18:54Bobby Lee?

  That's it.

• 18:55Andrew Santino?

  Stand up.

• 18:56Bobby Lee?

  That does enough.

• 18:57Andrew Santino?

  Stand up.

• 18:58Bobby Lee?

  Okay, what?

• 18:59Andrew Santino?

  Take your pants off.

• 19:00Bobby Lee?

  Alright, what?

• 19:03Andrew Santino?

  That's interesting.

• 19:06Bobby Lee?

  End scene.

• 19:08Andrew Santino?

  Even the teacher doesn't know?

• 19:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:11Andrew Santino?

  I don't know what that is.

• 19:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I wouldn't be a good teacher because not because I don't know I don't know knowledge and I don't have any topic.

• 19:18Andrew Santino?

  You got a lot of knowledge.

• 19:19Bobby Lee?

  But, yeah, what what if I had to be forced to be a teacher at a school with the things that I know? What would it be about?

• 19:29Andrew Santino?

  Well, Star Wars, you could do some sort of.

• 19:32Bobby Lee?

  But not that Star Wars.

• 19:33Andrew Santino?

  No, but I'm saying you could do like. Star Trek. Star Trek film.

• 19:35Bobby Lee?

  Our track.

• 19:36Andrew Santino?

  You could do film or television theory. You could do TV theory, right? Production.

• 19:39Bobby Lee?

  Maybe, maybe.

• 19:41Andrew Santino?

  Media, media, what is that? Media production? You could do that. You could do, you could do an entrepreneurial class, a digital entrepreneur.

• 19:48Bobby Lee?

  You think so?

• 19:49Andrew Santino?

  How to start your own business on the internet. It's literally your whole life.

• 19:51Bobby Lee?

  But you could do more than me.

• 19:52Andrew Santino?

  The fuck I could. I don't know math. I don't know science.

• 19:55Bobby Lee?

  Bowling.

• 19:56Andrew Santino?

  A ball of sports. Yeah.

• 19:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 19:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, sports.

• 19:58Bobby Lee?

  Golf.

• 19:58Andrew Santino?

  Yep, I could do.

• 19:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I know, but still PE that you could be a coach.

• 20:03Andrew Santino?

  I am a gym teacher.

• 20:04Bobby Lee?

  A gym teacher, right?

• 20:05Andrew Santino?

  Gym teacher.

• 20:05Bobby Lee?

  Um, I think you would know about hip history of hip hop and music.

• 20:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but I don't think a white, redheaded guy can teach that.

• 20:12Bobby Lee?

  I think that needs to change.

• 20:13Andrew Santino?

  I do, too.

• 20:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Oh, I could do probably, um, like more punk, you know, I mean, art rock, you know, I mean.

• 20:21Andrew Santino?

  The history of punk?

• 20:22Bobby Lee?

  Or the history of alternative music, maybe I could do.

• 20:24Andrew Santino?

  You could do alt music.

• 20:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 20:25Andrew Santino?

  But by the way, think about this. Now the generations below us, how old is like Nirvana to them now?

• 20:31Bobby Lee?

  It's so crazy.

• 20:32Andrew Santino?

  Think about that.

• 20:33Bobby Lee?

  It's classic music now.

• 20:34Andrew Santino?

  We have a radio station here in LA called K Earth 101. And when I first moved to LA.

• 20:38Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 20:39Andrew Santino?

  It was the oldies, which was the 50s, 60s and 70s.

• 20:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 20:42Andrew Santino?

  Now it's the 70s, 80s and 90s.

• 20:44Bobby Lee?

  I can't believe it.

• 20:45Andrew Santino?

  That's oldies. The 90s!

• 20:47Bobby Lee?

  The 90s is oldies?

• 20:48Andrew Santino?

  70s, 80s and 90s.

• 20:50Bobby Lee?

  So Creep is an oldie?

• 20:52Andrew Santino?

  Yes!

• 20:52Bobby Lee?

  That song Creep?

• 20:53Andrew Santino?

  Yes!

• 20:54Bobby Lee?

  How about I'm a Loser by Beck?

• 20:56Andrew Santino?

  Oldie.

• 20:57Bobby Lee?

  That's not an oldie. That's a newie, dude.

• 20:58Andrew Santino?

  It's a goodie, but it's.

• 20:59Bobby Lee?

  It's a goodie. Oh, wow. What's a, what's a newie?

• 21:03Andrew Santino?

  Chapel Rohn. That's a newie.

• 21:06Bobby Lee?

  Fuck.

• 21:06Andrew Santino?

  Sabrina Carpenter. That's a newie.

• 21:09Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 21:10Andrew Santino?

  We're oldie buddy.

• 21:11Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god.

• 21:12Andrew Santino?

  I feel that.

• 21:13Bobby Lee?

  Would, um, Harry Styles be newy?

• 21:15Andrew Santino?

  He's newishy.

• 21:16Bobby Lee?

  Newishy.

• 21:17Andrew Santino?

  Newishy.

• 21:17Bobby Lee?

  Newishy, yeah.

• 21:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, because you gotta think, remember that kid that was at the show? He was 16 years old. You think of his world. We're old. We're fucking old dude.

• 21:26Bobby Lee?

  Then why does he like us? Cause we're new.

• 21:29Andrew Santino?

  We're newy she.

• 21:31Bobby Lee?

  Newishy. You know that song? I don't know the lyrics, but it's a Harry Styles song. Who's on it now? I'm swimming the stars. Going down this way.

• 21:45Bobby Lee?

  I love you.

• 21:49Andrew Santino?

  What is this song?

• 21:50Bobby Lee?

  Wait. I do do do, do do do do do. Do do do do.

• 21:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

• 21:56Bobby Lee?

  Do do do. That song?

• 21:58Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, this is, uh...

• 21:59Bobby Lee?

  Do do do. Yeah, I can do it in dudes. I can do it in dudes. I can't do it in, yeah, yeah. I can do anything in dudes, dude.

• 22:04Andrew Santino?

  You're a chewduder.

• 22:05Bobby Lee?

  I'm a duder dude.

• 22:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, duder.

• 22:06Bobby Lee?

  But that song one day, if that song becomes like an oldie? I hang you.

• 22:13Bobby Lee?

  Shopify, oh my god. Without, if you have an online business and you don't have Shopify?

• 22:18Andrew Santino?

  What are you doing?

• 22:19Bobby Lee?

  You're not doing it good.

• 22:19Andrew Santino?

  You're not doing a good job, that's for sure, because no one does selling better than Shopify. It's home of the number one checkout on the planet. We've been shipping you guys merch since we started this show. And thankfully for Shopify, it makes it so simple, so easy. Put into one, easy to use place for us and for you.

• 22:36Bobby Lee?

  So if you're into growing your business, which you all should be?

• 22:39Andrew Santino?

  You should be.

• 22:40Bobby Lee?

  Your commerce platform better be ready to sell whenever your customers are scrolling or strolling on the web, in the store, in their feed, and everywhere in between.

• 22:49Andrew Santino?

  Businesses that sell more, sell on Shopify, okay? That's what's really going on. Upgrade your business and get the same checkout that Skims and Allbirds and ALO uses.

• 23:02Bobby Lee?

  Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com/badfriends, all lowercase.

• 23:07Andrew Santino?

  Go to Shopify.com/badfriends to upgrade your selling today. That's Shopify.com/badfriends.

• 23:14Bobby Lee?

  HelloFresh. With HelloFresh, you get farm-fresh, pre-portioned ingredients and seasonal recipes delivered right to your doorstep.

• 23:22Andrew Santino?

  That's right.

• 23:22Bobby Lee?

  Skip trips to the grocery store and count on HelloFresh to make home cooking easy, fun, and affordable. That's why it's America's number one meal kit.

• 23:31Andrew Santino?

  That's right. It's easy to find time to eat well with 50 wholesome, hassle-free meals to choose from each week, delivered to your door. Look, Bob and I are on the run. We're on the road. We're on the move. We're moving and shaking. And we need something fast and wonderful and delicious and easy. And that's why HelloFresh's 15-minute meals are done in just three simple steps, so you can eat better this year without all the hassle.

• 23:51Bobby Lee?

  You know, I love HelloFresh because it also tastes like a restaurant meal.

• 23:54Andrew Santino?

  It does taste restaurant quality.

• 23:55Bobby Lee?

  It's like really delicious.

• 23:56Andrew Santino?

  And it comes right to your front door. You don't even have to leave. It's so simple. And you know what? You gotta try it. If you're a busybody and you need something easy and delicious and healthy, get up to 10 free meals and a free high-protein item for life at HelloFresh.com/badfriends10fm.

• 24:11Bobby Lee?

  One item per box with active subscription. Free meals applied as discount on first box. New subscribers only. Varies by plan.

• 24:20Andrew Santino?

  That's up to 10 free HelloFresh meals. Just go to HelloFresh.com/badfriends10fm. HelloFresh, America's number one meal kit.

• 24:28Speaker 00

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• 25:13Bobby Lee?

  That would mean that I'm just too old.

• 25:16Andrew Santino?

  We're well.

• 25:16Bobby Lee?

  That like what we like we're like it's like our Sinatra. You know what I mean?

• 25:22Andrew Santino?

  We're gonna get there.

• 25:23Bobby Lee?

  That Harry Styles will one day be like Sinatra.

• 25:26Andrew Santino?

  He is, I mean, he for that.

• 25:27Bobby Lee?

  Oh, my.

• 25:28Andrew Santino?

  For that generation, is he not? Shalhoub is kind of like.

• 25:33Andrew Santino?

  Not I was gonna say Newman, but. Shalhoub is kind of like who's the best comparatively old actor to Shalhoub? He would be like. Paul Newman is not too far off. Yeah, it's like a Robert De Niro. But De Niro was very brand specific. Right? Brando was more broad.

• 25:51Andrew Santino?

  Newman was more more more more like him because he was very traditionally handsome.

• 25:54Bobby Lee?

  Jimmy Stewart.

• 25:56Andrew Santino?

  Jimmy was more Jimmy had a lot of character based stuff too, like he was very kind of a. I don't know. Yeah, it's hard.

• 26:03Bobby Lee?

  Think about this.

• 26:04Andrew Santino?

  God, he's good though, huh?

• 26:05Bobby Lee?

  He's the best Shalhoub.

• 26:06Andrew Santino?

  Unbelievable, that kid.

• 26:08Bobby Lee?

  200 years ago from now, what is the music gonna be like? To us, it's gonna be like, right? Don't you think?

• 26:14Andrew Santino?

  You know.

• 26:14Bobby Lee?

  It'll be like.

• 26:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 26:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:23Bobby Lee?

  And people are just at the club. Dancing to that. We're gonna be like.

• 26:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:27Bobby Lee?

  What is this?

• 26:29Andrew Santino?

  Turn that fucking music down.

• 26:34Bobby Lee?

  Right? And we're like, what the fuck? And there's a singer going ding. He's going to ding.

• 26:40Andrew Santino?

  He's going to.

• 26:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Right? And we're like, what is this? But the kids are like, you're old.

• 26:46Andrew Santino?

  You don't get it.

• 26:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you guys like lyrics. And like, you know, melody.

• 26:51Andrew Santino?

  Go write a poem.

• 26:52Bobby Lee?

  Melody. Yeah.

• 26:53Andrew Santino?

  Loser.

• 26:53Bobby Lee?

  Oh, my God. And what is movies gonna be like? Fuck, it's gonna be all around us.

• 27:00Andrew Santino?

  We will be.

• 27:01Bobby Lee?

  Like VR.

• 27:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we'll be living in a movie.

• 27:03Bobby Lee?

  Imagine like you're in the Avengers. Because they're gonna do another Avengers 100 years from now.

• 27:08Andrew Santino?

  They have to keep making.

• 27:08Bobby Lee?

  They're gonna remake it.

• 27:09Andrew Santino?

  They have.

• 27:09Bobby Lee?

  Right? But now, you know what I mean? I'm gonna be the cab driver. You know, that cab driver that just dies?

• 27:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 27:16Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean?

• 27:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 27:17Bobby Lee?

  Because I was watching Avengers yesterday again for the 90th time. I get bored.

• 27:21Andrew Santino?

  You gotta.

• 27:21Bobby Lee?

  And I look at all the extras, right? The lady goes. You know what I mean? With the briefcase down the street, you know what I mean? And I go, what is where is she going?

• 27:28Andrew Santino?

  Where is she going?

• 27:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, where is she going? But I also looked up. The Avengers, that New York scene. I go, approximate how many people died in that last scene? 2,600 people died there.

• 27:42Andrew Santino?

  Jesus.

• 27:42Bobby Lee?

  That scene, 2,600 people died and no one gives a shit about those people.

• 27:47Andrew Santino?

  They're gone.

• 27:49Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 27:51Andrew Santino?

  You know, what is cinema is gonna be us, I guess. It's just gonna be alive. It'll be a thing that's happening, like live perfor- I think performance art will like morph into li- like art will just become life. Will they be, they'll be merged into one. You'll just be seeing live performance art. Like now, I walked down the street the other day in New York and this, these girls were doing like a fucking full TikTok coordinated dance. Their phone is on the window. They have no, they, they're in the middle of the street. They don't even care about the world around them. We'll just continue to be immersed in this world. People are making their own ver- their own realities through virtual reality.

• 28:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 28:21Andrew Santino?

  And they'll just live through that.

• 28:22Bobby Lee?

  Or maybe I could be Bob Dylan.

• 28:24Andrew Santino?

  I don't think so.

• 28:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. The gullies are broken, the silly is gone.

• 28:29Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 28:29Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? The mountains arise and the fountains are done.

• 28:33Andrew Santino?

  Keep going.

• 28:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. The Clippers are winning and the Lakers are done. Times, they are a-changing. What do you think?

• 28:43Speaker 04

  Whoa.

• 28:44Bobby Lee?

  Pretty good. Dylan-esque, right? You could do one.

• 28:47Andrew Santino?

  Hmm.

• 28:50Andrew Santino?

  The Mexicans are gone, Trump wants them out.

• 28:55Bobby Lee?

  Very good.

• 28:55Andrew Santino?

  Koreans won't budge, they'll scream and they'll shout.

• 29:00Bobby Lee?

  Oh, and then Woody Guthrie was like.

• 29:07Bobby Lee?

  So that guy Scoot, who played Woody Guthrie, came to the OR, cause you know, he's, he's dating my friend Sosi. So Sosi goes, um, we're, me and Scoot are coming and I got him a table and they sat and five comics all night long pointed to him. And he goes, great job in the movie.

• 29:28Andrew Santino?

  He did do a great job.

• 29:29Bobby Lee?

  Like Marc Maron, like a bunch of people and it was, I just, and I could see him just like, like take it in, you know what I mean? Like he killed it in that movie.

• 29:38Andrew Santino?

  Imagine what that feels like.

• 29:39Bobby Lee?

  But you know, like we, we get audience reactions every night.

• 29:43Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 29:43Bobby Lee?

  So we know what that's like.

• 29:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but we never put out like a, an award-winning performance.

• 29:46Bobby Lee?

  This is.

• 29:48Andrew Santino?

  You think so? I don't think we'll.

• 29:50Bobby Lee?

  No, I don't think so.

• 29:53Bobby Lee?

  I don't think so. Yeah, I don't think so.

• 29:54Andrew Santino?

  You know what this is? This show should be called Bare Minimum.

• 29:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 29:59Andrew Santino?

  Two bears, one minimum.

• 30:01Bobby Lee?

  Wow. Yeah, you're right. But it was nice to see. So I shared with you what happened last Thursday for Kimmy.

• 30:07Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 30:09Bobby Lee?

  It was a disaster. And I'd like to share it on group level, if I may.

• 30:12Andrew Santino?

  Give it.

• 30:13Bobby Lee?

  Okay. I get a call from the little hobbit, the punk rock hobbit. You know who that is?

• 30:20Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 30:21Bobby Lee?

  The punk rock hobbit. Just think about it. He's a comic.

• 30:24Andrew Santino?

  The punk rock hobbit.

• 30:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. He started.

• 30:28Andrew Santino?

  Josh Adam Myers?

• 30:29Bobby Lee?

  Started comedy later, late in life.

• 30:31Andrew Santino?

  Dean Del Rey?

• 30:33Bobby Lee?

  So he calls me, "Hey, Bobby, I'm doing this benefit show. Steven Tyler, baby." Right? And I go, "I don't do well in benefit shows. You're gonna kill." So I show up and Steven Tyler is in the green room.

• 30:48Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 30:48Bobby Lee?

  I take a photo with him. Super nice.

• 30:50Andrew Santino?

  Did he ask you or you ask him?

• 30:51Bobby Lee?

  I think he goes, "Hey, let's take a photo."

• 30:53Andrew Santino?

  I'm serious.

• 30:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. I think that was the vibe.

• 30:55Andrew Santino?

  I know he's a fan.

• 30:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and I sat there and I was like, "This is cool." Then Josh Holmes comes in from Queens of the Stone Age. And let me say something.

• 31:05Bobby Lee?

  I'm one of his biggest fans.

• 31:07Andrew Santino?

  You love Queens?

• 31:09Bobby Lee?

  No, I love them crooked vultures. Yeah, and I met him and I was just like, "Oh, are you ever gonna put out another Vultures album?" He's like, "I know, we're all, you know, our schedules and that." And then Adam Ray goes up and he's pretty good and I'm after him. And so I go up. I open my mouth and I'm telling you guys right now, I know I told you guys this yesterday, right? I haven't bombed like this in years. It was silent in the room. And my time, because I want to kill, right? Because I'm like, my heroes are in the crowd, right?

• 31:48Bobby Lee?

  And about two minutes in, in my periphery, because I know where Josh Holmes is sitting, I could just see him stand up and just walk up.

• 31:56Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 31:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, he walked out of the room.

• 31:57Andrew Santino?

  What if he was going to make another album?

• 32:01Andrew Santino?

  You could have inspired him.

• 32:02Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, no, no, no, no. My heart combusted into my fucking chest plate.

• 32:08Andrew Santino?

  Well, Josh, please reach out.

• 32:09Bobby Lee?

  And then I go, well, you might as well go to the back. And you know what he's doing? He's talking to Adam Ray in the back.

• 32:15Andrew Santino?

  Oh, boy, that hurt.

• 32:17Bobby Lee?

  It hurt.

• 32:18Andrew Santino?

  And what toppled that over the worst? The server comes to the table the other night, right after you tell that story, and the server goes, "Sorry, I don't know who you guys are."

• 32:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 32:25Andrew Santino?

  "That's okay." She goes, "Do you know Adam Ray?"

• 32:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I remember that.

• 32:28Andrew Santino?

  You got so fucked up.

• 32:29Bobby Lee?

  I didn't get mad.

• 32:30Andrew Santino?

  You were bummed.

• 32:30Bobby Lee?

  I'm proud.

• 32:31Andrew Santino?

  You were.

• 32:32Bobby Lee?

  You were bummed too.

• 32:32Andrew Santino?

  No, I was, I didn't give a shit at all.

• 32:34Bobby Lee?

  When your eyes crinkle, dude, you get, that's jealousy. Yeah, you did that. You did a Clint Eastwood, dude.

• 32:38Andrew Santino?

  You know what I was on? I was like, "I don't want to talk anymore. I want to eat food. I'm starving."

• 32:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 32:43Andrew Santino?

  She wanted to talk comedy.

• 32:45Bobby Lee?

  But, you know, and Adam's having a moment, that's great, right? But it's just like, it, it broke my heart. And you know what? I, the same thing happened to me 18 years ago, and I've never shared this, because it's so embarrassing.

• 32:57Andrew Santino?

  Give it.

• 32:57Bobby Lee?

  So there was this time where Anthony Kiedis was really hot on me.

• 33:01Andrew Santino?

  He was like, you're hitting on you?

• 33:03Bobby Lee?

  No, he loved my comedy.

• 33:04Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 33:05Bobby Lee?

  I remember one time he, I was playing in Vegas, and he brought, that's, the reason why I was in The Dictator is because he, he introduced me to Sasha.

• 33:13Andrew Santino?

  Whoa.

• 33:14Bobby Lee?

  So I was, I was playing the Playboy Comedy Night at the Palms, and Court McCowan comes up to me and goes, "Dude, fucking Anthony Kiedis is here, with Sacha Baron Cohen and David Spade."

• 33:25Andrew Santino?

  Oh, wow.

• 33:26Bobby Lee?

  So they sat, watched my set, and then they took me to dinner, right? And then, um, and then like, he would invite me to shows, Anthony. And then I was doing a show at the El Cid, and he brought Flea, the whole band. And they sat in front. It was alternative room. Okay?

• 33:43Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 33:44Bobby Lee?

  I bombed so hard that night, I never talked to him again.

• 33:49Andrew Santino?

  He never communicated with you again?

• 33:50Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 33:51Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 33:51Bobby Lee?

  I would, I could see them blush, and he was embarrassed. You've never bombed in front of your heroes?

• 33:57Andrew Santino?

  Well, you're my hero and every time I do bad in front of you, it breaks my heart.

• 34:00Bobby Lee?

  No, you've never, you always kill it in front of your heroes.

• 34:03Andrew Santino?

  Did you like that? That's not even remotely true.

• 34:04Bobby Lee?

  Dude, you're, you know what?

• 34:06Andrew Santino?

  That's, you know, that's not even remotely true. In fact, in fact, in fact, in fact, in front of like famous people? No, I don't have any good stories of like famous people coming to see. The only good story I had was when Catherine O'Hara came to see me.

• 34:16Bobby Lee?

  Where?

• 34:17Andrew Santino?

  At the improv.

• 34:18Bobby Lee?

  Wow, when?

• 34:19Andrew Santino?

  I told you guys that story.

• 34:20Bobby Lee?

  No, we never heard that. When?

• 34:21Andrew Santino?

  I've never told that on the show. I have told this story. Yeah. I was auditioning for a show. He did a TV show for HBO.

• 34:27Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 34:27Andrew Santino?

  I auditioned for the show.

• 34:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 34:29Andrew Santino?

  And then by way of somehow through a manager or something, she, obviously so close with guest, she came and saw me at the improv and somebody was like, hey, I think Catherine O'Hara is here to see you. And I was like, fuck, really? I was so bummed. I was by the bar. I was like, fuck, this is not good. Cause what like, what the fuck am I gonna do? Right? I go up, I have a fine set. It was good.

• 34:54Bobby Lee?

  Of course you did.

• 34:55Andrew Santino?

  Well, the rhythm, the rhythm was nice. The room was good. And then I go back, like I nervously like walked by the room and then I go, I go in, um, I go into, you know, to the green room.

• 35:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 35:05Andrew Santino?

  And I was like, oh, I should go say, I want to go say hi, maybe. And then two, the guy that was working at the booth was like, she left. I was like, fuck dude. And he was like, no, no, no, no. She sat, watched your whole show, was laughing, and then as soon as you got done, she got up and she went back home. And I never heard about it ever again. Christopher never, I never spoke to him about it. I never heard anything about it.

• 35:24Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 35:25Andrew Santino?

  Kind of crazy.

• 35:26Bobby Lee?

  That's cool.

• 35:27Andrew Santino?

  It felt so sad, so rock star. I don't know if she was like, if she like caught wind and it, I don't even know how it happened that it was like, I'm gonna go watch that guy.

• 35:34Bobby Lee?

  So I, I have, you know, that there was a movie idea that I, my, my friend, McGrail and I came up with. And there's a pretty big male, you know, actor that wants, that is curious about a role.

• 35:47Andrew Santino?

  Like a, like a big guy?

• 35:48Bobby Lee?

  He's pretty, I don't want to say who it is, but he, um, he wants to see me sometime in the next couple of weeks, perform. But I, I'm, I'm afraid that I'm gonna, it's gonna be another, you know what I mean, Josh, Josh Holmes situation.

• 36:00Andrew Santino?

  No chance. And Josh, by the way, reach out. He's not mad.

• 36:03Bobby Lee?

  No, I know. It's all in my head. He was so nice to me, by the way. And I'm a huge fan. He's such a great talent.

• 36:08Andrew Santino?

  Imagine if he emails Carlos in the booth at gmail.com and he's like, please tell Bobby that I do love him.

• 36:13Bobby Lee?

  And I've hit the ball so many times too. I mean, I mean,

• 36:16Andrew Santino?

  You almost always hit the ball.

• 36:17Bobby Lee?

  Almost every time I do, you know what I mean?

• 36:18Andrew Santino?

  Sometimes we, sometimes we foul tip it. We're gonna foul tip it.

• 36:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, sometimes you do.

• 36:24Andrew Santino?

  Who's here?

• 36:25Speaker 05

  Dax.

• 36:27Andrew Santino?

  Bring him in.

• 36:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, bring him in.

• 36:28Andrew Santino?

  Bring in our boy.

• 36:31Andrew Santino?

  Uh oh. Look who it is.

• 36:34Bobby Lee?

  Oh my, did you cut your hair?

• 36:36Speaker 05

  Uh, not recently. Well, I took a shower a second ago.

• 36:40Speaker 04

  That's it.

• 36:41Bobby Lee?

  That's it.

• 36:43Bobby Lee?

  I think you nailed it.

• 36:44Andrew Santino?

  That's it, buddy.

• 36:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Hello.

• 36:46Andrew Santino?

  Welcome back to the show, Dax Flame, everybody.

• 36:48Bobby Lee?

  You look like you had a spiritual experience. Like, you look like a different person.

• 36:53Speaker 05

  Uh, I exercised also today.

• 36:57Speaker 04

  And showered.

• 36:58Andrew Santino?

  What did we do in the exercise? What did we do?

• 37:00Speaker 05

  Uh, I played basketball with a friend.

• 37:02Andrew Santino?

  Can we, can I see your three-point stance? Wow.

• 37:06Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 37:06Speaker 04

  Whoa.

• 37:07Bobby Lee?

  One-on-one?

• 37:08Speaker 05

  Uh, uh, no, just shooting.

• 37:11Andrew Santino?

  You guys were just shooting together?

• 37:12Speaker 05

  Mm-hmm.

• 37:13Andrew Santino?

  How long do you shoot for?

• 37:14Speaker 05

  Uh, maybe thirty minutes to an hour.

• 37:16Andrew Santino?

  And do you break, break a sweat or no?

• 37:18Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 37:19Andrew Santino?

  Are you wearing these clothes that you're wearing now, or are you wearing?

• 37:21Speaker 05

  No, uh, I wore shorts today.

• 37:24Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you did?

• 37:25Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 37:25Bobby Lee?

  I've never seen your legs before.

• 37:27Speaker 05

  I, yeah, I usually wear jeans or pants.

• 37:29Bobby Lee?

  Are your legs nice?

• 37:32Andrew Santino?

  Let's see.

• 37:32Speaker 05

  You can see them if you want.

• 37:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I'd like to see them.

• 37:34Bobby Lee?

  Well, I'd like to see one.

• 37:35Andrew Santino?

  Whoa.

• 37:36Bobby Lee?

  Whoa, those are pretty good legs, actually.

• 37:39Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 37:39Bobby Lee?

  They're World War II legs.

• 37:42Andrew Santino?

  Those are, that's like Normandy.

• 37:43Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? Like, just a traditional white.

• 37:45Andrew Santino?

  Those are Normandy.

• 37:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, Normandy legs, dude. Traditional white.

• 37:48Andrew Santino?

  Have you ever stormed a beach?

• 37:49Speaker 05

  No.

• 37:50Andrew Santino?

  Do you go to the beach?

• 37:51Speaker 05

  Uh, yeah, but I never swim.

• 37:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you shouldn't.

• 37:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:54Andrew Santino?

  You shouldn't. You don't know what's out there.

• 37:55Bobby Lee?

  You know who you're, you know what guy you are on Normandy?

• 37:58Speaker 05

  Who?

• 37:58Bobby Lee?

  The guy that kind of catches on fire. But then you run to the ocean.

• 38:03Speaker 05

  Is that the, is Saving Private Ryan, is that where that started?

• 38:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 38:06Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 38:07Bobby Lee?

  But then you run to the ocean, you're only half-burned, but then you pretend you're dead in the water.

• 38:11Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 38:11Bobby Lee?

  Then the war passes, and then you, and then you're back.

• 38:14Andrew Santino?

  Would you play dead in war, do you think?

• 38:16Speaker 05

  In a movie or in?

• 38:17Bobby Lee?

  In real war.

• 38:17Andrew Santino?

  No, real war, it's coming.

• 38:19Speaker 05

  If I didn't think I had a chance anymore.

• 38:21Andrew Santino?

  You'd just play dead. Play possum.

• 38:22Speaker 05

  Yeah. Unless there is like someone I could potentially help.

• 38:26Bobby Lee?

  Okay, look, let's, let's play it out, all right? We're in one of those, I don't know what you call it, but you know, in the beginning of Saving Private Ryan, they're in that boat.

• 38:34Andrew Santino?

  Those boats.

• 38:34Bobby Lee?

  U-boat.

• 38:35Andrew Santino?

  Well, no, U-boats are the submarines, right?

• 38:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but it's one of those boats where, like, you know, and they're always like either vomiting, right? And they're just super scared.

• 38:42Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 38:43Bobby Lee?

  And bullets. Whizzing by, right? And they're holy, and, and there's always one guy with a cross and he kisses it, right? Right, there's always one guy like that. And there's another guy going mama, you know what I mean? There's a mama guy always.

• 38:55Andrew Santino?

  And there's one guy going.

• 38:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The Rogan.

• 39:00Andrew Santino?

  Killer.

• 39:00Bobby Lee?

  Joe Rogan. Overcompensating, right?

• 39:03Andrew Santino?

  Jacked up on alphabet.

• 39:03Bobby Lee?

  Right, so then the thing closes, goes down.

• 39:08Bobby Lee?

  And then you see two or three guys in the front just go down right away. Right? What do you do?

• 39:13Andrew Santino?

  What do you do?

• 39:14Speaker 05

  So I see two people just die right away?

• 39:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Well, you're like fourth row. You know what I mean?

• 39:19Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 39:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you know what I mean? Frankie Castro dies in front of you, right? Devon Sanchez dies in front of you.

• 39:26Andrew Santino?

  Marco.

• 39:26Bobby Lee?

  Jackson Jackson dies in front of you.

• 39:28Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Marco Suano.

• 39:29Bobby Lee?

  Marco Suano but dies in front of you, and then what do you do?

• 39:32Speaker 05

  Stay in the boat.

• 39:34Andrew Santino?

  Stay in the boat.

• 39:36Bobby Lee?

  You don't move forward to the beach, I mean.

• 39:38Speaker 05

  If every single person is getting killed?

• 39:39Andrew Santino?

  They are.

• 39:40Bobby Lee?

  No, but, but you're, you're fucking cap, what do you call it, captain or?

• 39:43Andrew Santino?

  You're a sergeant.

• 39:44Bobby Lee?

  Sergeant.

• 39:44Andrew Santino?

  You're a sergeant.

• 39:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, sergeant's going, come on Flame! Move forward Flame!

• 39:51Andrew Santino?

  Get going Flame!

• 39:52Bobby Lee?

  And you're just gonna sit there? People are dying. You just sit there Flame?

• 39:56Speaker 05

  Yeah, I would, I'd probably just point out that every single person has died as they left, so.

• 40:01Bobby Lee?

  Oh, alright.

• 40:01Andrew Santino?

  It's pretty logical.

• 40:02Bobby Lee?

  It's pretty logical.

• 40:03Andrew Santino?

  It does make sense.

• 40:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, ah, you know what, you, you probably go overboard on the other side, under the water.

• 40:07Speaker 05

  They would throw me over, you're saying?

• 40:09Bobby Lee?

  I, that, cause if you were in front of me and you weren't moving, right? I would throw you over so I could get forward.

• 40:14Speaker 05

  But then you would get killed, right?

• 40:16Bobby Lee?

  I don't know yet, it's, the odds are bad, but it's like I have to go forward.

• 40:19Andrew Santino?

  I would use you as a human shield.

• 40:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, me too.

• 40:21Andrew Santino?

  I think I would grab you and I would just have my flame shield.

• 40:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 40:26Andrew Santino?

  And you're just getting.

• 40:28Andrew Santino?

  Let me see what that looks like.

• 40:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. You know what I would do too? When he's down?

• 40:38Bobby Lee?

  When he's down, you know what I would do?

• 40:39Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 40:39Bobby Lee?

  I would steal something. You know what I would steal from him?

• 40:41Speaker 05

  Hmm.

• 40:42Bobby Lee?

  His morphine packet.

• 40:43Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah.

• 40:43Bobby Lee?

  Morphine, morphine packet. And you would, you'd feel every pain.

• 40:47Speaker 05

  Yeah, you would.

• 40:48Bobby Lee?

  Of your death. I wouldn't inject you with the morphine because you were a coward.

• 40:52Speaker 05

  That would probably, yeah, that would make more sense than just people going forward using someone as a shield.

• 41:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 41:00Speaker 05

  Pretty heavily.

• 41:01Bobby Lee?

  Dude, that was a brutal scene.

• 41:02Andrew Santino?

  What's been going on with you, Dax?

• 41:05Speaker 05

  Um.

• 41:06Andrew Santino?

  What's been happening in your life? Somebody told me that you're seeing somebody now. I heard a rumor that you're dating somebody famous. Do you know this?

• 41:11Speaker 05

  Oh, that's not accurate.

• 41:12Andrew Santino?

  He's got a famous girlfriend. He's being shy about it.

• 41:15Bobby Lee?

  I'm jealous. Tell me who it is.

• 41:17Speaker 05

  Emma Watson.

• 41:19Andrew Santino?

  He's dating Emma Watson. He has been, he's been seen, paparazzi have caught them out in public.

• 41:24Bobby Lee?

  You're really dating Emma Watson?

• 41:25Speaker 05

  Hmm.

• 41:27Andrew Santino?

  Why are you being shy about it?

• 41:29Speaker 05

  She, she asked me to, um, keep it private, but I don't like to keep anything private.

• 41:35Andrew Santino?

  I mean, we can cut it out.

• 41:36Bobby Lee?

  Are you being real right now?

• 41:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he is. Do you want us to cut it out?

• 41:39Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 41:40Andrew Santino?

  We should cut it out.

• 41:41Bobby Lee?

  Is there a photo?

• 41:42Andrew Santino?

  There was a paparazzi photo. I don't know.

• 41:43Bobby Lee?

  Well, no, with, I want to see Dax and Emma together. I kind of believe it.

• 41:48Andrew Santino?

  No, they are.

• 41:48Bobby Lee?

  Really?

• 41:49Andrew Santino?

  No. That's it real quick.

• 41:50Bobby Lee?

  Is that him?

• 41:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 41:51Bobby Lee?

  BlueChew. I'm sorry, but without BlueChew, maybe I'm not good.

• 41:56Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 41:56Bobby Lee?

  Because I've been using it, you know what I mean? Because I'm an older male.

• 41:59Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 42:00Bobby Lee?

  And, uh, sometimes I have, you know, E.

• 42:02Andrew Santino?

  It's hard to get the owl up at night.

• 42:04Bobby Lee?

  And BlueChew is putting its money where its mouth is and offering you a month free, guys.

• 42:09Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 42:09Bobby Lee?

  The process is simple. Sign up to bluechew.com, consult with one of their licensed medical providers, and once you're approved, you'll receive your prescription within days.

• 42:18Andrew Santino?

  That's so easy. BlueChew tablets are made here in the U.S.A. They're prepared and shipped directly to your door. Take them anytime, anywhere, day or night, so you do it right. You can plan ahead, okay? Bobby's been using this for a long time now, and I'm not, I'm not kidding. The effectiveness is crazy. This guy.

• 42:33Bobby Lee?

  I love it.

• 42:34Andrew Santino?

  Gets hard as a rock, lasts for ever. That's why he's late to the show all the time. Why not get bricked up like Bobby Lee?

• 42:41Bobby Lee?

  Mm-hmm.

• 42:42Andrew Santino?

  You ready for the best sex of your life? We got a special deal for our listeners. Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at bluechew.com.

• 42:51Bobby Lee?

  And we have a special deal for our listeners. Try your first month of Bluetooth free. Visit bluetooth.com for more details and important safety information. And we thank Bluetooth for sponsoring the podcast.

• 43:02Andrew Santino?

  Zocdoc.

• 43:03Bobby Lee?

  And you know what? Without Zocdoc, my skin wouldn't be good because I got, what's on my radar?

• 43:08Andrew Santino?

  I have a sore throat.

• 43:09Bobby Lee?

  Oh my, you gotta go to Zocdoc.

• 43:11Andrew Santino?

  I have to get a doctor.

• 43:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, this is the best way to get one.

• 43:13Andrew Santino?

  I gotta sound like a f-kay.

• 43:14Bobby Lee?

  Can I tell you what it is?

• 43:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 43:16Bobby Lee?

  Zocdoc is a free app, my friend.

• 43:18Andrew Santino?

  What is it?

• 43:18Bobby Lee?

  And website where you can search and compare highly quality. Are you breathing okay?

• 43:22Andrew Santino?

  I'm fine.

• 43:23Bobby Lee?

  In-network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment.

• 43:26Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 43:27Bobby Lee?

  And we're talking about, my friend, booking in-network appointments with more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty from mental health to dental health, primary care or urgent care and more.

• 43:37Andrew Santino?

  You can filter based on specific preferences.

• 43:39Bobby Lee?

  I know this.

• 43:39Andrew Santino?

  Whether you're looking for a male doctor, speaks a specific language, si puede, has availability that fits your work schedule or has an opening in the next day or so. Look, you're gonna find the right doctor on there for you. I moved to a new neighborhood. I jumped on Zocdoc. I thought, how good is this? It's very good. And also, appointments are made through Zocdoc. They can happen fast. Typically, you can get it within 24 to 72 hours of booking. You can even score same-day appointments if you're lucky. It's amazing.

• 44:01Bobby Lee?

  Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to zocdoc.com/badfriends to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today.

• 44:08Andrew Santino?

  That's z-o-c-d-o-c.com/badfriends. Zocdoc.com/badfriends.

• 44:16Speaker 00

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• 45:01Andrew Santino?

  Isn't that crazy?

• 45:01Bobby Lee?

  That's crazy dude.

• 45:03Andrew Santino?

  So you, so how did you guys meet? How'd you meet Emma Watson?

• 45:06Speaker 05

  I went to a Harry Potter thing.

• 45:08Andrew Santino?

  Like a meetup or a convention or what was it?

• 45:11Speaker 05

  A book signing.

• 45:12Andrew Santino?

  Oh, okay, right on.

• 45:13Bobby Lee?

  Oh, a book signing. Who was signing the book?

• 45:16Speaker 05

  Emma.

• 45:17Bobby Lee?

  Oh, Emma Watson was.

• 45:18Andrew Santino?

  Did you just run game on her?

• 45:20Speaker 05

  Mm-hmm.

• 45:20Andrew Santino?

  So I'm Emma Watson. Hello, welcome. You want me to sign your book?

• 45:25Bobby Lee?

  Hello? I'm her publicist, Ramon. Hello?

• 45:29Andrew Santino?

  That's my publicist Ramon. Would you like me to sign a book?

• 45:32Speaker 05

  Uh, yeah.

• 45:33Andrew Santino?

  Wonderful. What's your name?

• 45:34Speaker 05

  Dax.

• 45:35Andrew Santino?

  Dax, you're cute.

• 45:36Speaker 05

  Thank you, so are you.

• 45:37Andrew Santino?

  Thank you.

• 45:37Bobby Lee?

  I don't know why you're signing that. That's Eyes Wide Shut, the script.

• 45:40Andrew Santino?

  Oh, wow.

• 45:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 45:42Andrew Santino?

  Is this the script for American Psycho? Listen.

• 45:47Andrew Santino?

  Are you a big fan?

• 45:48Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 45:49Andrew Santino?

  You want a photo?

• 45:49Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 45:50Andrew Santino?

  All right, anything else?

• 45:51Bobby Lee?

  All right, hurry up.

• 45:53Speaker 05

  Um, how's your day going?

• 45:56Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god.

• 45:56Andrew Santino?

  I mean, not bad at all, really.

• 45:58Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 45:58Andrew Santino?

  It's better that you're here.

• 45:59Speaker 05

  Oh, thank you. What kind of things do you like to do?

• 46:02Andrew Santino?

  Uh, I mean, count money, um...

• 46:07Speaker 05

  These things are probably the worst.

• 46:09Andrew Santino?

  Go shopping, eating food.

• 46:11Bobby Lee?

  Crab cap, crab.

• 46:12Andrew Santino?

  Crab, I love crab cakes.

• 46:15Speaker 05

  I like this as well.

• 46:16Andrew Santino?

  And I'm a big, I'm a big all-...

• 46:18Bobby Lee?

  He loves horchata.

• 46:19Andrew Santino?

  I love horchata.

• 46:21Speaker 05

  That's very good.

• 46:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah?

• 46:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 46:23Andrew Santino?

  So?

• 46:24Bobby Lee?

  Salsa verde.

• 46:25Andrew Santino?

  Love salsa verde.

• 46:27Bobby Lee?

  If she's eating Mexican food, she loves salsa verde.

• 46:30Speaker 05

  What's your favorite place to get it?

• 46:32Andrew Santino?

  Mexican food?

• 46:32Bobby Lee?

  Yep.

• 46:33Andrew Santino?

  Mmm, maybe like, um, Del Taco.

• 46:35Bobby Lee?

  Piquito Mas.

• 46:35Andrew Santino?

  Piquito Mas.

• 46:36Speaker 05

  Okay. Uh, we should go there sometime.

• 46:40Andrew Santino?

  You're asking me out on a date?

• 46:41Speaker 05

  Mm-hmm.

• 46:41Andrew Santino?

  Really? Wow.

• 46:44Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 46:45Andrew Santino?

  You've got quite the confidence, little man.

• 46:46Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 46:48Bobby Lee?

  You're absolutely incredible, dude.

• 46:49Andrew Santino?

  Are you cut or uncut?

• 46:52Speaker 05

  Uh.

• 46:53Andrew Santino?

  Have you got a sleeve, or is it a mushroom?

• 46:56Speaker 05

  Um, it's, uh, I'm circumcised, yeah.

• 46:59Andrew Santino?

  Really?

• 47:00Speaker 05

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:00Bobby Lee?

  Hmm.

• 47:01Andrew Santino?

  And how big is it limp?

• 47:02Speaker 05

  Uh, normal.

• 47:03Bobby Lee?

  Excuse me for a second, Emma, there's a long line.

• 47:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they can wait.

• 47:06Bobby Lee?

  I know, but it's like, you know, we've, we had a hard out in forty-five minutes.

• 47:09Andrew Santino?

  I'm quite horny, so they can wait.

• 47:10Bobby Lee?

  I know, but.

• 47:11Andrew Santino?

  How, how big is it limp?

• 47:12Speaker 05

  Um, I'm uncomfortable with your publicist hearing.

• 47:16Andrew Santino?

  Oh, well, close your ears.

• 47:17Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 47:18Speaker 05

  Uh.

• 47:18Andrew Santino?

  How big is it?

• 47:19Speaker 05

  Average, normal.

• 47:20Andrew Santino?

  Great. Uncover?

• 47:21Bobby Lee?

  Okay. I heard it still, but, um.

• 47:23Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he said average.

• 47:24Bobby Lee?

  Tom Hardy's in line.

• 47:26Andrew Santino?

  Really?

• 47:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, he's gonna ask you out.

• 47:28Andrew Santino?

  Well, give me your number and take me out on a date.

• 47:31Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 47:32Andrew Santino?

  I can't wait to see you.

• 47:32Bobby Lee?

  Where are you gonna take her?

• 47:33Speaker 05

  Uh, Pekito Mas.

• 47:36Andrew Santino?

  Mm-mm. Get more creative.

• 47:37Bobby Lee?

  Get more creative.

• 47:38Speaker 05

  Uh.

• 47:41Speaker 05

  Hiho? That was the place.

• 47:43Bobby Lee?

  Hiho hamburger.

• 47:44Andrew Santino?

  Love a Hiho.

• 47:45Bobby Lee?

  It's owned by.

• 47:45Andrew Santino?

  After the date, what would you want?

• 47:47Bobby Lee?

  Sugar fish.

• 47:47Andrew Santino?

  What do you want to do to me?

• 47:49Speaker 05

  Um, uh, maybe.

• 47:52Andrew Santino?

  I'm yours, Dex.

• 47:53Speaker 05

  Oh, uh.

• 47:54Andrew Santino?

  What would you do to me?

• 47:56Bobby Lee?

  In the villa. We have a villa.

• 47:59Speaker 05

  I guess, uh, make out.

• 48:01Andrew Santino?

  Make out?

• 48:02Speaker 05

  Mm-hmm.

• 48:02Andrew Santino?

  Then?

• 48:04Speaker 05

  Maybe see whatever you're comfortable with, uh.

• 48:06Andrew Santino?

  I'm comfortable with all of it. Tell me what you like. You want me to spit on you, kick you, pull your air?

• 48:13Speaker 05

  Um, I think, uh, maybe just play it by ear.

• 48:18Andrew Santino?

  You want me to play with your ears?

• 48:20Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 48:21Andrew Santino?

  Wonderful.

• 48:22Bobby Lee?

  Grab his, grab his ears. Shit in his mouth.

• 48:27Andrew Santino?

  Dude, I see how you got her.

• 48:29Bobby Lee?

  Really good, Dex.

• 48:29Andrew Santino?

  Well, let me tell you something. We've had a lot of submissions to break up your relationship. You know this. We've had women who have submitted to date you. Do you know this?

• 48:35Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 48:36Andrew Santino?

  Put on your headphones so you can hear this woman if you'd like. Right there.

• 48:39Bobby Lee?

  Let's be honest, okay? If you, if, if you really wanna go on a date, we'll make it happen.

• 48:43Andrew Santino?

  And if you, you really are dating Emma Watson, so some of these women need to get in line. People, people need to know. So, this woman will be second. Let's see.

• 48:53Speaker 06

  Hi Dex. My name is Katie. I'm thirty-four years old. Um, I am a single mom. I have a four-year-old son that lives with me full-time. I work in Orange County. I work at a veterinary hospital. I'm a practice manager. Um, so I'm around animals all day, pretty much. Um, I do like to go to comedy shows. I was at the Comedy Store a few weeks ago when you opened for Bobby and Andrew, and that was awesome. Um, you're super funny. And I like going to hockey games. I'm a huge hockey fan. Um, I like good food.

• 49:38Speaker 06

  Um, I don't really know what else to say, but yeah, hopefully I get to talk to you soon.

• 49:44Andrew Santino?

  She's a babe.

• 49:44Bobby Lee?

  Bro.

• 49:45Andrew Santino?

  She's a babe. She works with animals? Babe. Hockey. Babe.

• 49:49Speaker 05

  She's very pretty, yeah.

• 49:51Bobby Lee?

  She's pretty. We did not pay her to say it.

• 49:52Speaker 05

  Oh, okay.

• 49:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. In case you have doubts. Honestly, honestly, how do you feel? Let's be real.

• 49:57Speaker 05

  Good.

• 49:58Bobby Lee?

  You do? About her?

• 50:00Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 50:00Andrew Santino?

  Is this someone that might be your type?

• 50:02Speaker 05

  Uh, yeah.

• 50:04Andrew Santino?

  Right on. Do you like hockey at all?

• 50:05Speaker 05

  No.

• 50:07Bobby Lee?

  Could you pretend to like it?

• 50:09Speaker 05

  Uh, yeah.

• 50:09Andrew Santino?

  All right, check it out. We're at the hockey game. We're at the Anaheim Ducks game, and they're playing the Edmonton Oilers. Look at them out there. Uh, which one do you like the most?

• 50:16Speaker 05

  That guy.

• 50:16Andrew Santino?

  Who you rooting for?

• 50:18Speaker 05

  Oh, the Oilers.

• 50:19Andrew Santino?

  No!

• 50:22Andrew Santino?

  Fuck, dude, we gotta get that part right.

• 50:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 50:24Speaker 05

  The Ducks.

• 50:24Andrew Santino?

  Anaheim Ducks. Ducks. She lives in Orange County. Yeah. Uh, which, which, uh, what position do you like the most on the ice? Who do you like?

• 50:30Speaker 05

  Goalie.

• 50:31Andrew Santino?

  You love the goalie. Nice, dude. You like to protect.

• 50:34Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 50:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you seem like a protector.

• 50:36Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 50:37Andrew Santino?

  Right on, man. And she has a four-year-old son. You gonna be comfortable with another, another young man around?

• 50:41Speaker 05

  A child, yeah.

• 50:42Bobby Lee?

  Oh, now a puck comes towards you. What do you do?

• 50:45Andrew Santino?

  Whoa!

• 50:45Bobby Lee?

  You grabbed it? No, you grabbed it with your mouth. Like a seal, dude. You go, ah, and then go like that.

• 50:53Andrew Santino?

  Well, no, he grabbed it. What if he puts it in his mouth afterward?

• 50:55Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's true.

• 50:56Andrew Santino?

  Wow, did you catch the puck? Do it again. Whoa!

• 50:59Bobby Lee?

  Whoa.

• 51:01Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 51:04Bobby Lee?

  And then, okay, so, um, great. You gonna take her on a date?

• 51:08Speaker 05

  Uh, in real life or in hot?

• 51:09Bobby Lee?

  In real life.

• 51:10Speaker 05

  Oh, um, yeah.

• 51:12Andrew Santino?

  Okay, before you do, her four-year-old son is right here. This is Milo.

• 51:16Bobby Lee?

  Hi.

• 51:17Andrew Santino?

  And you have to tell Milo that you're gonna take his mom on a date because he's a little uncomfortable.

• 51:22Andrew Santino?

  And he's got a tick.

• 51:24Bobby Lee?

  It's cool to meet you.

• 51:26Speaker 05

  Nice to meet you. How is, how are you?

• 51:30Bobby Lee?

  I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, good.

• 51:36Speaker 05

  Do you go to school?

• 51:38Bobby Lee?

  Yep, yep, yep, yep.

• 51:42Speaker 05

  Uh, you're...

• 51:45Speaker 05

  You seem really cool.

• 51:46Bobby Lee?

  You go, go.

• 51:48Speaker 05

  Do you like hockey?

• 51:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, Gretzky.

• 51:52Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah, Wayne Gretzky.

• 51:54Bobby Lee?

  No, John.

• 51:56Andrew Santino?

  John Wayne Gretzky.

• 51:57Bobby Lee?

  John Wayne Gretzky.

• 51:58Andrew Santino?

  John Wayne Gretzky.

• 51:59Bobby Lee?

  He's my favorite serial killer.

• 52:02Andrew Santino?

  So, I don't know if you're willing to leave Emma Watson, but Bad Friends will pay for you to take a girl on a beautiful date. If you'd like to take any of these women on a date, we will pay for the date. And I'm talking start to finish.

• 52:12Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 52:13Andrew Santino?

  We'll get you a car service, we'll get you a nice dinner, we'll pick up the bill, you know, movie, whatever you want to do afterwards.

• 52:19Bobby Lee?

  I'll be there.

• 52:20Andrew Santino?

  Bobby will have the chaperone.

• 52:21Bobby Lee?

  I have the chaperone.

• 52:22Speaker 05

  Would y'all both be there?

• 52:23Andrew Santino?

  Would you like us both to be there?

• 52:25Speaker 05

  Um, uh, so it would either be just, just you or just the two of you?

• 52:30Andrew Santino?

  No, I'm, I'm...

• 52:33Andrew Santino?

  I'm probably not gonna be there.

• 52:36Bobby Lee?

  Wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry. Be honest with me, dude. Let's get this out in the open, dude. Why are you uncomfortable with just me being there?

• 52:44Speaker 05

  Well, I think if there's just one other person on a, like, a date, it, it, it might feel... Well, I don't, I actually don't, I don't know, yeah.

• 52:52Bobby Lee?

  You don't know?

• 52:53Speaker 05

  True.

• 52:53Bobby Lee?

  Exactly.

• 52:54Andrew Santino?

  Would you like me and Bobby to go on a double date with you and one of these girls?

• 52:57Speaker 05

  Oh, like you would bring people?

• 52:59Bobby Lee?

  I'll bring my own date, you bring a date.

• 53:00Andrew Santino?

  No, I was saying, you and I date each other.

• 53:02Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, we'll bring...

• 53:02Andrew Santino?

  The fuck are you talking about?

• 53:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, us two together.

• 53:04Andrew Santino?

  We're on a date.

• 53:05Speaker 05

  Uh, that could be...

• 53:07Andrew Santino?

  Distracting?

• 53:08Speaker 05

  Yeah, but it might make things less...

• 53:12Andrew Santino?

  How about this, we'll pay for a date with you and one of these nice young ladies if you feel like, or many if you'd like, and, and you just report back and tell us how it went.

• 53:18Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 53:19Andrew Santino?

  Do you want us to be there? I don't think we'd want to be there.

• 53:21Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 53:22Andrew Santino?

  Do you want us to be there?

• 53:23Speaker 05

  Uh...

• 53:23Bobby Lee?

  Be honest.

• 53:25Speaker 05

  I, I don't, I don't know. I have to, I have, I have to think.

• 53:29Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, think about it.

• 53:31Bobby Lee?

  But okay, if you were to, do you have a car yet?

• 53:33Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 53:34Bobby Lee?

  Good. That's good.

• 53:35Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 53:36Andrew Santino?

  Congratulations. You got a new car?

• 53:37Speaker 05

  No, it's not new.

• 53:39Andrew Santino?

  But I mean, you got a car.

• 53:40Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 53:40Bobby Lee?

  Did you not have a car before?

• 53:41Speaker 05

  Yeah, no, I did.

• 53:42Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you did? You always had a car?

• 53:43Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 53:43Bobby Lee?

  I know why I thought he didn't.

• 53:45Speaker 05

  A Subaru.

• 53:46Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's a good car.

• 53:48Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 53:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Would you drive to Orange County to take her on a date? Okay.

• 53:52Andrew Santino?

  I will say there's a couple of hockey games coming up. Maybe we can get you to one of those hockey games with that girl.

• 53:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 53:56Andrew Santino?

  If you're interested.

• 53:57Bobby Lee?

  Do you hook up on the first date or no? Generally or no?

• 54:00Speaker 05

  I, if I felt comfortable with someone and there was a good, yeah, then I, then I would be comfortable too.

• 54:12Andrew Santino?

  I believe that.

• 54:15Andrew Santino?

  I believe that.

• 54:19Andrew Santino?

  If you had an unlimited budget to take a girl out on a date to, to a restaurant or whatever, where are you taking her? We're paying, bad friends are paying, don't worry about it.

• 54:26Bobby Lee?

  No, like, how about this? A weekend?

• 54:29Andrew Santino?

  A getaway?

• 54:29Bobby Lee?

  A getaway, right? You, we will pay for everything. You just tell us what, sky's the limit.

• 54:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, where do you want to?

• 54:36Bobby Lee?

  Where do you want to go?

• 54:37Andrew Santino?

  We will.

• 54:37Bobby Lee?

  I'm, we're, we're travel agents.

• 54:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 54:39Bobby Lee?

  And, you know.

• 54:40Speaker 05

  Tokyo.

• 54:42Bobby Lee?

  Tokyo, little Tokyo.

• 54:43Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 54:45Bobby Lee?

  Little Tokyo in downtown LA.

• 54:46Andrew Santino?

  Right. That's what you meant.

• 54:47Bobby Lee?

  Or Tokyo, Japan.

• 54:49Speaker 05

  Tokyo, Japan.

• 54:50Bobby Lee?

  Okay, Tokyo, okay, Tokyo, Japan. That's great. So, um, did you write that down, Tokyo?

• 54:54Andrew Santino?

  I did, I heard it.

• 54:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:56Andrew Santino?

  It's a little expensive.

• 54:56Bobby Lee?

  It is, but we're gonna do it.

• 54:57Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 54:58Bobby Lee?

  Yes, so, um, and first class? For both of you? First class, both of them?

• 55:05Andrew Santino?

  Interesting, yeah, that'll be cheap.

• 55:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 55:07Andrew Santino?

  What hotel, like?

• 55:08Bobby Lee?

  We're already 10,000 dollars.

• 55:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we're deep. This is bad.

• 55:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 55:10Andrew Santino?

  Park Hyatt? What hotel?

• 55:11Speaker 05

  Yeah, Park Hyatt.

• 55:12Andrew Santino?

  That's bad. Okay, he knows.

• 55:13Bobby Lee?

  How much is, how much is the Park Hyatt?

• 55:14Speaker 05

  Boston Translation.

• 55:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, couple thousand a night.

• 55:16Bobby Lee?

  Couple thousand?

• 55:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 55:17Bobby Lee?

  How many nights is it?

• 55:18Andrew Santino?

  I think, how long you gonna stay there?

• 55:20Speaker 05

  A couple of weeks.

• 55:20Andrew Santino?

  Oh, okay.

• 55:21Bobby Lee?

  14, 14 times what?

• 55:24Andrew Santino?

  That's two and a half thousand?

• 55:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. So, we're talking about 30 grand. Along with the flights, 40, we're about 50 grand.

• 55:31Andrew Santino?

  We're sinking right now.

• 55:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. 50 grand and then, um.

• 55:34Andrew Santino?

  Euro Dreams of Sushi? You wanna go see Euro on the subway? Yeah.

• 55:36Bobby Lee?

  Subway, okay, that's another grand, two grand.

• 55:39Andrew Santino?

  Five.

• 55:39Bobby Lee?

  Five grand?

• 55:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 55:40Bobby Lee?

  From Euro, alright. Can we go out just like, you know, like dumplings and stuff after that or no?

• 55:46Speaker 05

  For a couple of days.

• 55:47Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 55:48Andrew Santino?

  Oh, he's got demands.

• 55:49Bobby Lee?

  And so then, what are some of the activities you would like to do?

• 55:54Speaker 05

  Should probably just walk around and look for stuff.

• 55:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, okay.

• 55:56Andrew Santino?

  That'll be cheap.

• 55:57Bobby Lee?

  That's cheap.

• 55:58Andrew Santino?

  Thank God.

• 55:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 55:59Andrew Santino?

  This guy's gonna buy a bullet train or something.

• 56:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 56:02Andrew Santino?

  Have you been to Japan before?

• 56:03Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 56:04Andrew Santino?

  And you loved it?

• 56:05Speaker 05

  I got the flu, so that's why I wanna go back and not get sick.

• 56:12Bobby Lee?

  Wait, you got the flu on your way there once you got there?

• 56:15Speaker 05

  On day two.

• 56:16Bobby Lee?

  Oh my God, what was that like?

• 56:18Speaker 05

  Depressing.

• 56:19Andrew Santino?

  How did you get it, do you think? You got it from traveling?

• 56:22Speaker 05

  Yeah, probably from just from traveling.

• 56:23Andrew Santino?

  Was it a bug or the physical, like you were?

• 56:25Speaker 05

  I, they told me it was the flu, cuz then I went and like, went to the doctor to see if I needed any medicine, and they said it was the flu.

• 56:32Bobby Lee?

  It wasn't COVID, it was before COVID?

• 56:34Speaker 05

  After.

• 56:35Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 56:36Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 56:37Bobby Lee?

  Wow, that's incredible.

• 56:37Andrew Santino?

  And how long were you there with the flu?

• 56:39Speaker 05

  Uh, one week, so one day healthy and then six days sick, and then I went back.

• 56:45Andrew Santino?

  So you were in bed for six days?

• 56:46Speaker 05

  Well, yeah, I mean, the second day I was kinda like, just kinda like, walking around but feeling bad, and I was like, I'm just gonna relax at my hotel, and then I just started to feel really bad.

• 56:55Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 56:56Andrew Santino?

  So you spent six days in a hotel, basically?

• 56:58Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 56:58Bobby Lee?

  Who'd you go with?

• 57:00Speaker 05

  Just solo.

• 57:03Andrew Santino?

  Dax.

• 57:04Bobby Lee?

  You're by yourself?

• 57:05Andrew Santino?

  Sick in Japan?

• 57:06Bobby Lee?

  Sick in Japan, by yourself. That's the saddest.

• 57:09Andrew Santino?

  Did you ever write a song about this?

• 57:11Speaker 05

  No.

• 57:11Andrew Santino?

  You should.

• 57:12Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 57:12Andrew Santino?

  Sick in Japan.

• 57:13Bobby Lee?

  Sing it now.

• 57:13Speaker 05

  Sick in Japan.

• 57:14Andrew Santino?

  Let's hear it. Here it is, ladies and gentlemen, the debut of Sick in Japan by Dax Flame.

• 57:19Speaker 05

  I was excited, bought my ticket, let's take this trip. Well, it's awesome going around, but there's something else going around, it's the flu, and I miss you.

• 57:33Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 57:34Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 57:35Speaker 05

  Sick in Japan, sick in Japan.

• 57:39Andrew Santino?

  Pretty sick.

• 57:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Did you fly first class?

• 57:42Speaker 05

  No.

• 57:43Bobby Lee?

  Why'd you ask first class for this trip?

• 57:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, what's going on?

• 57:45Speaker 05

  You said unlimited budget.

• 57:46Andrew Santino?

  We did, yeah.

• 57:47Bobby Lee?

  That is true, that's my bad.

• 57:48Andrew Santino?

  I gotta be honest with you, I kinda wanna send this, him to Japan.

• 57:51Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 57:51Andrew Santino?

  Like, I really would love.

• 57:52Bobby Lee?

  Now we feel bad.

• 57:53Andrew Santino?

  I want you to go.

• 57:54Speaker 05

  Uh, I'll go, okay.

• 57:58Andrew Santino?

  Should we pay for him to go to Japan? I think that's a fucking rad move. Would you, would you love that?

• 58:05Speaker 05

  I would love that, but no pressure.

• 58:07Andrew Santino?

  But how about this? Here's the, here's the twist. You've gotta go to LAX right now. The twist would be, you have to leave from the podcast and go to, you have to go literally now. You might not even be able to go home.

• 58:18Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 58:19Bobby Lee?

  We'll buy you a kimono.

• 58:21Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 58:21Bobby Lee?

  Right? One of those, you know what I mean, chopstick hair things? You gotta put those on-

• 58:26Andrew Santino?

  What do you think, Dax? Would you go to Japan right now if we bought you a ticket?

• 58:30Speaker 04

  There's two flights tonight.

• 58:32Speaker 05

  I do need my laptop.

• 58:34Bobby Lee?

  Why? You wanna watch Netflix? What are you doing?

• 58:37Speaker 05

  So I can edit.

• 58:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he wants to be able to edit and shoot.

• 58:39Bobby Lee?

  Oh, edit your shit.

• 58:41Speaker 05

  Yeah, cuz I have videos that I have to post still. And I could make new ones.

• 58:45Bobby Lee?

  Or we could maybe bring a friend of yours to shoot. He's gonna wanna work out there, right?

• 58:49Andrew Santino?

  No, he's gotta go alone cuz he wants to relive that solo experience in Japan. That's the beauty of Japan. Am I right?

• 58:54Speaker 05

  Uh, yeah.

• 58:56Andrew Santino?

  Who shoots with you normally?

• 58:57Speaker 05

  Uh, my friend.

• 58:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I met him.

• 58:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we met him, we met, I met him. I think we should send him to fucking Japan, dude.

• 59:06Bobby Lee?

  That's more, what's cheaper?

• 59:08Andrew Santino?

  What's cheaper?

• 59:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 59:09Andrew Santino?

  Mongolia or something?

• 59:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 59:11Andrew Santino?

  I mean, I don't-

• 59:12Bobby Lee?

  Would you like to go to Mongolia?

• 59:14Speaker 05

  Uh, I don't know anything about it, but I would go.

• 59:16Andrew Santino?

  It's great.

• 59:17Bobby Lee?

  There's a Genghis Khan museum.

• 59:20Speaker 05

  That'd be cool.

• 59:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. And you like Mongolian beef?

• 59:23Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 59:23Andrew Santino?

  They got that. They got that. There it is.

• 59:26Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 59:27Andrew Santino?

  I gotta, I gotta tell ya.

• 59:28Bobby Lee?

  And the eagle? Look at the eagle.

• 59:29Andrew Santino?

  Look at the eagle.

• 59:30Bobby Lee?

  Do you like Mongolian eagles?

• 59:31Andrew Santino?

  Baby.

• 59:31Speaker 05

  That, that looks pretty cool. Like, I'd like to see that.

• 59:34Bobby Lee?

  Dude, look at how much, you're gonna, you're gonna get sick out there.

• 59:37Andrew Santino?

  No way. You get healthier, if anything.

• 59:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. I managed, us on a donkey with an eagle on our arm, dude. You and I. Us three going there.

• 59:46Andrew Santino?

  Nah, I'm watching. That's you and me and, that's you, me and Bobby. That's Bobby with the eagle.

• 59:50Bobby Lee?

  Imagine, imagine that life. The fresh air.

• 59:54Speaker 05

  It does look like, really, really refreshing.

• 59:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 59:56Speaker 05

  And interesting.

• 59:58Andrew Santino?

  I really wanna send him to Japan.

• 1:00:00Bobby Lee?

  Okay, Japan?

• 1:00:01Andrew Santino?

  I really mean it. I'm not even fucking kidding for the show. I really wanna send him to Japan.

• 1:00:04Bobby Lee?

  Well, let's just fucking do it, man.

• 1:00:06Andrew Santino?

  Okay, fine.

• 1:00:07Bobby Lee?

  We're gonna send you to Japan. Look at that, though. Huh?

• 1:00:11Speaker 05

  Cool.

• 1:00:13Bobby Lee?

  Have you ever seen a skeleton cow?

• 1:00:16Bobby Lee?

  What is that next door, that lady? That's insane looking.

• 1:00:19Andrew Santino?

  Mongolia dude.

• 1:00:21Bobby Lee?

  What is that?

• 1:00:22Speaker 04

  Cow.

• 1:00:22Bobby Lee?

  That's a cow?

• 1:00:25Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:00:25Speaker 04

  On a Sunday.

• 1:00:27Andrew Santino?

  What time is it right now? What time is it?

• 1:00:29Speaker 04

  Eight.

• 1:00:30Bobby Lee?

  It's eight, eight oh one.

• 1:00:31Andrew Santino?

  What is, is there a midnight flight? Would you really go tonight if we booked you a flight?

• 1:00:34Speaker 05

  Well, I would have to get my passport.

• 1:00:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we did send you home and then you-

• 1:00:38Bobby Lee?

  Of course.

• 1:00:38Andrew Santino?

  Okay, there's an eleven twenty.

• 1:00:40Speaker 05

  I am supposed to go to New York on Friday.

• 1:00:43Bobby Lee?

  Why?

• 1:00:44Speaker 05

  Cause someone wanted me to come make videos for them.

• 1:00:47Andrew Santino?

  Would you rather go to Japan?

• 1:00:49Speaker 05

  Um. Could I do both?

• 1:00:53Andrew Santino?

  You want us to, well, just, we'll fly you a round trip from LA to Japan and back. So you leave tonight at midnight, eleven twenty PM. You lose two days, you know that, right?

• 1:01:02Speaker 05

  Let's see.

• 1:01:03Bobby Lee?

  We get him back.

• 1:01:05Andrew Santino?

  When you come back?

• 1:01:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Is it really that long?

• 1:01:08Speaker 04

  Well, he has to stop.

• 1:01:09Andrew Santino?

  There's only a stop at night. There's no direct at night.

• 1:01:12Bobby Lee?

  Hmm, twenty-two hours.

• 1:01:14Andrew Santino?

  You willing to stop?

• 1:01:15Speaker 04

  Stop is ten hours.

• 1:01:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Yeah? Cause you wanna go to Japan.

• 1:01:19Bobby Lee?

  Can we stop him in Mongolia at least?

• 1:01:25Bobby Lee?

  There's gotta be a cheaper one.

• 1:01:29Andrew Santino?

  How much is it?

• 1:01:30Speaker 04

  Nine forty, you have a five hour stop in-

• 1:01:32Bobby Lee?

  He wants first class though, dude.

• 1:01:35Bobby Lee?

  How much is first class?

• 1:01:36Andrew Santino?

  First class is so expensive.

• 1:01:37Bobby Lee?

  Just to see what it is. How much is first class?

• 1:01:39Speaker 04

  Twenty thousand dollars.

• 1:01:40Andrew Santino?

  Twenty thousand dollars? That's how much it costs to go to fucking Japan?

• 1:01:43Bobby Lee?

  The both ways or just one way?

• 1:01:45Andrew Santino?

  That's gotta be both ways.

• 1:01:46Bobby Lee?

  It's gotta be both ways.

• 1:01:47Speaker 04

  Round trip. We hope so.

• 1:01:49Bobby Lee?

  And what's business? That's insane.

• 1:01:53Andrew Santino?

  Twenty grand?

• 1:01:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we do business, right? We do business when we travel.

• 1:01:56Andrew Santino?

  We better be doing business.

• 1:01:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, we don't do first.

• 1:01:58Andrew Santino?

  Holy shit.

• 1:01:59Bobby Lee?

  Holy shit, imagine that.

• 1:02:02Andrew Santino?

  Imagine how many little Japanese guys can do that. They just do that all the time. Like little Japanese businessmen, they fly that all the time.

• 1:02:07Bobby Lee?

  Why do you have to be little?

• 1:02:08Andrew Santino?

  Huh?

• 1:02:08Bobby Lee?

  Some of them are bigger.

• 1:02:09Andrew Santino?

  Which ones?

• 1:02:10Bobby Lee?

  That's true.

• 1:02:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:12Speaker 04

  There's business, five thousand.

• 1:02:14Andrew Santino?

  Let me say this, and I'm not kidding, I'm not making a joke. When you get back from New York, you call the boys and we are immediately gonna book you a flight to Japan.

• 1:02:22Speaker 05

  Wow, okay, I'll, I'll do it if you still want to then.

• 1:02:25Andrew Santino?

  No, I want to now.

• 1:02:26Speaker 05

  Cool.

• 1:02:26Andrew Santino?

  So we will do it. The boys know, we will book you a flight to Japan.

• 1:02:28Bobby Lee?

  I wanna go though.

• 1:02:30Andrew Santino?

  You wanna go with him?

• 1:02:31Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 1:02:32Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 1:02:34Bobby Lee?

  But don't you wanna go?

• 1:02:35Speaker 04

  Let's all go.

• 1:02:36Andrew Santino?

  Well, we're going to Korea, aren't we? We're going to Korea.

• 1:02:38Bobby Lee?

  That's what you say, but I don't know, man.

• 1:02:40Andrew Santino?

  Do you not wanna go?

• 1:02:41Bobby Lee?

  I do wanna go, but is that real?

• 1:02:43Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's literally, I have to go.

• 1:02:44Bobby Lee?

  I know you have to go.

• 1:02:46Andrew Santino?

  So you...

• 1:02:46Bobby Lee?

  But who's gonna fly me there?

• 1:02:48Andrew Santino?

  They will.

• 1:02:49Bobby Lee?

  But they're gonna give me a business?

• 1:02:50Andrew Santino?

  Of course.

• 1:02:51Bobby Lee?

  Okay, alright, okay.

• 1:02:52Andrew Santino?

  Yes.

• 1:02:52Bobby Lee?

  I act like a baby.

• 1:02:53Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:54Bobby Lee?

  I'd like to go.

• 1:02:54Andrew Santino?

  Of course you're gonna go.

• 1:02:55Bobby Lee?

  I'll go.

• 1:02:56Andrew Santino?

  Dax.

• 1:02:56Bobby Lee?

  Dax. Will you go to Korea with us?

• 1:02:59Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:02:59Andrew Santino?

  Dude, how funny if he got sick again in Japan.

• 1:03:02Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I'm gonna get him sick.

• 1:03:03Andrew Santino?

  The second time?

• 1:03:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:04Speaker 04

  We can plan that.

• 1:03:05Andrew Santino?

  One of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life. We get him sick on purpose to the second trip to Japan? Do you speak Japanese?

• 1:03:11Speaker 05

  No.

• 1:03:11Andrew Santino?

  Try.

• 1:03:12Speaker 05

  Nichiwa?

• 1:03:13Andrew Santino?

  Good.

• 1:03:14Bobby Lee?

  Very good.

• 1:03:14Andrew Santino?

  Done.

• 1:03:15Bobby Lee?

  You're done. Dude, I thought it was a Japanese dude just then. Oh, sakko wasa masu.

• 1:03:18Andrew Santino?

  Say it again.

• 1:03:18Speaker 05

  Oh, hayao gozaimasu?

• 1:03:21Andrew Santino?

  When they walk into the restaurant?

• 1:03:22Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:03:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I get that.

• 1:03:23Bobby Lee?

  It's funny, you're scared of doing the accent.

• 1:03:25Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 1:03:26Speaker 05

  Uh, yeah.

• 1:03:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:31Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:32Bobby Lee?

  You are scared of it.

• 1:03:32Speaker 05

  I don't know, yeah, I don't know how that would sound.

• 1:03:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:35Speaker 05

  But...

• 1:03:35Bobby Lee?

  You've never done that at home, like, come on, Dax. You know you've done different accents at home, not on camera, because, you know, you're afraid to get cancelled.

• 1:03:42Speaker 05

  To do the Japanese accent while speaking Japanese?

• 1:03:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. At home, in your privacy, you do it?

• 1:03:50Speaker 05

  Um, maybe.

• 1:03:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. I mean, you've done, you've done, like, urban guys at home, you know what I mean?

• 1:03:58Speaker 05

  Maybe, I can't remember specific.

• 1:03:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. You, how about rednecks? Have you done it? Can you do a redneck, you know what I mean, impression? You could, because it's white, go ahead.

• 1:04:05Speaker 05

  Hey, y'all.

• 1:04:07Andrew Santino?

  Hey.

• 1:04:08Bobby Lee?

  Hey.

• 1:04:09Speaker 05

  Do you, do you like, do, do you like, uh, trailers?

• 1:04:14Andrew Santino?

  I do, do you?

• 1:04:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we do. Are you, do you have one for sale?

• 1:04:18Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:04:19Andrew Santino?

  How much?

• 1:04:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, well, tell us about it, I don't wanna just buy it.

• 1:04:21Andrew Santino?

  Okay, yeah, you're right, man.

• 1:04:22Speaker 05

  How much you got?

• 1:04:24Bobby Lee?

  That's not how it works. Explain to me what kind of trailer, what's, what are the convenient things about it and the utilities and...

• 1:04:31Speaker 05

  Just like the trailer hitch and...

• 1:04:34Bobby Lee?

  Well, that's, we were always, we always wanted a trailer hitch. Yeah, yeah, hitch. What else?

• 1:04:41Speaker 05

  Little, um, bed, a bed.

• 1:04:45Bobby Lee?

  We love little beds.

• 1:04:46Andrew Santino?

  Little bed to bed?

• 1:04:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, little bed to bed.

• 1:04:48Andrew Santino?

  Little bed to bed.

• 1:04:49Bobby Lee?

  You have a medium bed to bed?

• 1:04:50Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 1:04:51Bobby Lee?

  Okay, we'll get a medium bed to bed, yeah. And what else?

• 1:04:54Speaker 05

  TV.

• 1:04:55Bobby Lee?

  Oh, what kind though?

• 1:04:56Speaker 05

  Color? Color TV.

• 1:04:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, what kind?

• 1:04:58Speaker 05

  Flat screen.

• 1:04:58Bobby Lee?

  Flat screen? Oh, that's nice.

• 1:05:00Andrew Santino?

  How big?

• 1:05:01Speaker 05

  Thirty-six inch TV.

• 1:05:03Bobby Lee?

  Wow, that's-

• 1:05:03Andrew Santino?

  Not big at all.

• 1:05:04Bobby Lee?

  Not big at all, but, okay.

• 1:05:06Speaker 05

  Forty-eight inches.

• 1:05:07Andrew Santino?

  That's still pretty small, but that's fine.

• 1:05:09Bobby Lee?

  What else is there? Is there, um, a bathroom?

• 1:05:11Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 1:05:11Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:05:12Andrew Santino?

  How many?

• 1:05:13Speaker 05

  One, two.

• 1:05:14Bobby Lee?

  One or-

• 1:05:15Andrew Santino?

  You're gonna be losing your accent, sir. Where are you from?

• 1:05:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:05:18Andrew Santino?

  Where are you really from, sir?

• 1:05:19Speaker 05

  Texas.

• 1:05:20Andrew Santino?

  You're from Texas?

• 1:05:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:05:22Andrew Santino?

  What part?

• 1:05:23Speaker 05

  Dallas.

• 1:05:24Andrew Santino?

  Really? Where? Oh, my cousins, my cousin live in Dallas. They just moved there. What, which, uh, which area?

• 1:05:28Speaker 05

  North of Dallas.

• 1:05:30Andrew Santino?

  Like Frisco?

• 1:05:31Bobby Lee?

  We love North of Dal- don't we love North of Dallas?

• 1:05:33Andrew Santino?

  We love North of Dallas.

• 1:05:34Bobby Lee?

  We love it there.

• 1:05:36Andrew Santino?

  Nice.

• 1:05:36Bobby Lee?

  Piano bars.

• 1:05:37Andrew Santino?

  So are you gonna sell us this trailer?

• 1:05:39Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 1:05:39Andrew Santino?

  What are you asking for it?

• 1:05:41Speaker 05

  Fifteen thousand dollars.

• 1:05:43Andrew Santino?

  Hmm, no.

• 1:05:44Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:05:44Andrew Santino?

  That's like a flight to Japan.

• 1:05:52Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god, he's having a nervous breakdown.

• 1:05:54Speaker 05

  That's what I was-

• 1:05:54Bobby Lee?

  So weird.

• 1:05:55Andrew Santino?

  Seems like they have a-

• 1:05:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:05:56Andrew Santino?

  Is that what you're doing? You selling everything because you're moving to Japan?

• 1:05:58Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:05:59Andrew Santino?

  Wait, did something happen?

• 1:06:01Speaker 05

  Yeah, I got sick last time I was there.

• 1:06:08Speaker 05

  Want to redeem it?

• 1:06:08Bobby Lee?

  We should bring him to-

• 1:06:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I know, don't say it. Yeah, well, don't say it out loud.

• 1:06:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. We got some plans for you, bud.

• 1:06:17Speaker 05

  I, yeah-

• 1:06:18Bobby Lee?

  You like us as fam- we feel like family to you.

• 1:06:20Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:06:21Bobby Lee?

  You do?

• 1:06:21Speaker 05

  Can I ask you a question?

• 1:06:22Bobby Lee?

  Oh, me specifically, or Aunt? Okay, go ahead.

• 1:06:24Speaker 05

  My friend said she met you, and she said that I'm friends with Dax, and you said he's-

• 1:06:30Bobby Lee?

  Oh, wait, wait, stop, stop, stop, stop, wait, wait, stop.

• 1:06:33Bobby Lee?

  Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Stop. Don't-

• 1:06:40Bobby Lee?

  Oh, stop, I know what you're gonna say.

• 1:06:41Andrew Santino?

  And I know this is a true story. I know this is a-

• 1:06:43Bobby Lee?

  Hold on, hold on.

• 1:06:44Andrew Santino?

  Yes, it is.

• 1:06:44Bobby Lee?

  Your friend's lying, okay?

• 1:06:45Speaker 05

  No.

• 1:06:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, and I did it in a funny way. You know, you know how funny I am, right? Right? I do things in a comedic way, right? Do I not?

• 1:06:53Andrew Santino?

  You do.

• 1:06:53Bobby Lee?

  Right? Everything I say is like, with a, with a hint of like, comedy, right?

• 1:06:59Andrew Santino?

  Say what she said.

• 1:07:00Bobby Lee?

  No, I, well-

• 1:07:00Andrew Santino?

  Let him say it. What did she say?

• 1:07:02Speaker 05

  She said Bobby said, "That guy smells weird."

• 1:07:06Andrew Santino?

  Did you say Dax smells weird? One of our brothers?

• 1:07:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, smells weird.

• 1:07:14Speaker 05

  I didn't ask about the body language.

• 1:07:17Andrew Santino?

  How do you feel about that bud? Do you think Dax smells weird? Is that how you perceive him?

• 1:07:22Bobby Lee?

  Dude.

• 1:07:22Andrew Santino?

  He's our friend.

• 1:07:23Bobby Lee?

  Let's, can we work out the conversation here, okay?

• 1:07:25Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:07:26Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I'm friends with Dax. Yeah, he smells weird.

• 1:07:28Andrew Santino?

  What are you ta- what do you mean?

• 1:07:30Bobby Lee?

  I was kidding.

• 1:07:31Andrew Santino?

  That's not funny.

• 1:07:31Bobby Lee?

  I know, maybe it wasn't, my bad. He doesn't feel it smell weird, that's why I could say it.

• 1:07:36Andrew Santino?

  But that's really mean, I think.

• 1:07:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:38Andrew Santino?

  Can you call him and tell him you said that?

• 1:07:39Bobby Lee?

  Your friend, right? She has another thing coming now. Okay, right, and um, I said it in a comedic way, but when you started talking, I knew exactly what you were talking about. Because when I said it, and this is what a great friend she is, she was so mad on your behalf.

• 1:07:56Speaker 05

  She was pissed.

• 1:07:57Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god, yeah.

• 1:07:58Speaker 05

  Will you call her?

• 1:07:58Bobby Lee?

  She's like, what? She goes, what the fuck do you mean?

• 1:08:01Speaker 05

  Great.

• 1:08:02Bobby Lee?

  And I go, I'm just kidding.

• 1:08:04Speaker 05

  Will you call her right now?

• 1:08:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:05Speaker 05

  Did I what you showered today?

• 1:08:09Speaker 05

  Can I text her and ask her if it's okay?

• 1:08:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, text her.

• 1:08:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, text her.

• 1:08:14Andrew Santino?

  Cause I want, cause Bobby's willing to apologize. Because let me say something about my best friend Bobby Lee. He will, he will make up for his mistakes. Always. Am I right?

• 1:08:25Andrew Santino?

  Am I right?

• 1:08:27Bobby Lee?

  I hate being embarrassed.

• 1:08:27Andrew Santino?

  You make good. You always make good, you always have. He's done everyone right in this room.

• 1:08:32Bobby Lee?

  Also, can I just say another thing? I, I'm proud of you Dax, because it's something, it's not, it's something that you wouldn't say.

• 1:08:37Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:08:38Bobby Lee?

  Right? I, I feel like you're like, I wanna, right? That you would hold things within yourself, cause you're kind of shy. And you were very confrontational there.

• 1:08:47Speaker 05

  Oh yeah.

• 1:08:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:48Speaker 05

  Yeah, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable by confronting you. I asked her if, I told her, I said, can I call you? I want to ask you about the smell thing on Bad Friends.

• 1:08:57Bobby Lee?

  And what'd she say? Nothing yet?

• 1:08:59Speaker 05

  She hasn't replied, I turned it off of silent mode so that...

• 1:09:01Bobby Lee?

  Okay, I can't believe that.

• 1:09:03Andrew Santino?

  I believe every second of it.

• 1:09:04Bobby Lee?

  No, I cannot believe it. I honestly do, I didn't say it in like, to be like offensive, it was just like a funny thing.

• 1:09:12Andrew Santino?

  We know it was a joke.

• 1:09:13Bobby Lee?

  I know, but it's like, but she, she was being a good friend to you.

• 1:09:17Andrew Santino?

  What did she say?

• 1:09:19Bobby Lee?

  She said, "No, he doesn't." What the fuck do you mean by that? I was like, "Oh, I was just..."

• 1:09:23Andrew Santino?

  Just kidding.

• 1:09:24Bobby Lee?

  Just kidding. And she was like, "No, it sounded real." And I'm like...

• 1:09:30Andrew Santino?

  How did you meet this person at the store?

• 1:09:32Bobby Lee?

  I don't remember. I know that she was...

• 1:09:34Andrew Santino?

  I think she, at the improv.

• 1:09:36Bobby Lee?

  At the improv is what happened. Yeah, she performed.

• 1:09:38Andrew Santino?

  Oh, she's a comic?

• 1:09:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, she's a comic.

• 1:09:40Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I didn't know.

• 1:09:41Speaker 05

  New to comedy.

• 1:09:41Bobby Lee?

  She's new to comedy.

• 1:09:42Speaker 05

  Well, new to stand-up.

• 1:09:43Bobby Lee?

  Stand-up comedy, and so, um... Now, when she said it to you, was she saying it like, "Be careful of that guy, he's an asshole?"

• 1:09:51Speaker 05

  No.

• 1:09:52Bobby Lee?

  Okay, what did she, how did she say it?

• 1:09:54Speaker 05

  She just told me that story.

• 1:09:59Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god, I'm embarrassed.

• 1:10:00Andrew Santino?

  Was this the girl with, that we talked about the other night?

• 1:10:02Bobby Lee?

  No. Some complete, I'd never seen her before, she seemed super nice. You know what I mean? She was a little nervous about comedy, because she even said that, I think, she's like, "I'm not, I'm new to this."

• 1:10:12Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:10:12Bobby Lee?

  "You'll be fine," or something, you know what I mean? And then, she goes, "I'm friends with Dax," and I go, "Oh yeah, he smells weird." And she goes, "What the fuck."

• 1:10:19Andrew Santino?

  A different girl?

• 1:10:19Bobby Lee?

  No, the same girl. I would not say that again.

• 1:10:23Andrew Santino?

  One and done.

• 1:10:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm so sorry, Dax, can I say something? I apologize.

• 1:10:30Speaker 05

  I accept.

• 1:10:30Bobby Lee?

  No, I don't, no, really listen, okay?

• 1:10:33Speaker 05

  Well, I don't have a sense of smell, so...

• 1:10:36Speaker 05

  I, I, it's something, I'm, I take showers whenever I'm gonna be around people, and... Cause I can't tell anymore, since I lost my sense of smell a couple of years ago.

• 1:10:45Andrew Santino?

  From COVID?

• 1:10:45Speaker 05

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:10:46Andrew Santino?

  So you can't smell at all?

• 1:10:47Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:10:48Andrew Santino?

  Seriously?

• 1:10:48Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:10:49Andrew Santino?

  Nothing?

• 1:10:49Speaker 05

  Nothing.

• 1:10:50Andrew Santino?

  Oh my god.

• 1:10:53Andrew Santino?

  Now do you feel bad?

• 1:10:56Andrew Santino?

  I'm gonna tell you something right now.

• 1:10:57Speaker 05

  Oh, but she told me, "That's not true, you don't smell bad."

• 1:11:00Bobby Lee?

  You don't?

• 1:11:01Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 1:11:01Andrew Santino?

  I've never, you've never smelled bad?

• 1:11:03Bobby Lee?

  I've never even smelled you, when would I have the opportunity to?

• 1:11:05Andrew Santino?

  Well, he's here.

• 1:11:06Bobby Lee?

  You don't hug.

• 1:11:07Speaker 05

  That, that's what I said, I said, um, "I'm usually sitting like, seven..."

• 1:11:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and when we, when you leave, we never, we're never, we don't cross paths. You know, what, so I wanna say something, okay? I said it as a joke, to... I want to say something to you, okay? I honestly, I love you so much. And it's a blessing that you get to do our show, I mean that we have you on our show. Came out weird, yeah.

• 1:11:32Speaker 05

  Yeah, I do feel.

• 1:11:33Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, that's not what I meant. What I'm saying, it's a blessing that you do our show. We think you're an asset. You make our show so much more interesting and fun.

• 1:11:42Speaker 05

  I agree.

• 1:11:42Bobby Lee?

  You're so important to us. I would never do anything to burn this bridge. I really think that you're a sweet guy. You're a funny guy. I think you're brave. When you did that show with us at the Comedy Store in the main room. It was in the main room, you know how difficult that was and you crushed it?

• 1:11:59Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 1:11:59Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? I only see you as an ally and a brother. And I said it, I was trying to act cool because she was hot, your friend. His friend is beautiful, right? So I'm sorry.

• 1:12:11Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 1:12:12Andrew Santino?

  But you know what? Bobby occasionally will use comedy to deflect when he's uncomfortable. So maybe her beauty blew him away.

• 1:12:19Speaker 05

  Would you want me to say anything to her?

• 1:12:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm sorry that she had to hear that.

• 1:12:23Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 1:12:23Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:12:24Andrew Santino?

  No, that's not, no.

• 1:12:26Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 1:12:26Andrew Santino?

  It was a joke, tell her, clearly he's kidding.

• 1:12:29Bobby Lee?

  No, I apologize.

• 1:12:30Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 1:12:31Bobby Lee?

  Alright, let's squash it.

• 1:12:33Andrew Santino?

  Squash the beef.

• 1:12:34Speaker 05

  I wasn't, yeah, I didn't feel offended.

• 1:12:37Bobby Lee?

  Good, thank you, Dax.

• 1:12:39Andrew Santino?

  Have you ever been offended by us on this show?

• 1:12:41Speaker 05

  No.

• 1:12:42Andrew Santino?

  Good.

• 1:12:44Bobby Lee?

  We love you so, anyway, look in the camera.

• 1:12:46Speaker 05

  Thank you for being a bad friend.

• 1:12:48Andrew Santino?

  The best.

• 1:13:35Speaker 00

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