Starbucks VS Dunkin' w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Are You Garbage is back with Kevin Ryan and H. Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. It's a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! AYG 2025 Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets Watch Route 66: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSkJS1gCDR4 Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored by: Trade Coffee: Right now, Trade is offering 50% off a 1 month trial at https://drinktrade.com/garbage Thrive Market: Go to https://ThriveMarket.com/GARBAGE to get 30% off your first order and a free $60 gift. Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00H. Foley?

  I got a question for all you bozos and homies out there. Do you think you're garbage? Well, come find out the boys are about to hit the road for that Back on the Block Tour. We're starting out there on the left coast, baby.

• 0:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, we got San Francisco, Portland, Seattle, Brea. Then we got Burlington, Vermont, Boston, Massachusetts, Atlanta, Charlotte, Raleigh, Richmond, Baltimore, Philadelphia, at the Met, Rochester, Toronto. Guys, get your tickets now. These will sell out. We love you. They'll see you on the road.

• 0:26Speaker 02

  Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.

• 0:46H. Foley?

  Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage?

• 0:51Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 0:52H. Foley?

  It's that little show where we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that the group to be classy.

• 0:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:56H. Foley?

  But they're just a big old piece of trash.

• 0:58Speaker 01

  Trash, trash, trash.

• 0:59H. Foley?

  I'm your host, T. Trolley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with Tooties and a new addition. She killed a ladybug last night.

• 1:06Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:07H. Foley?

  She's fucked.

• 1:08Speaker 01

  All right.

• 1:08H. Foley?

  My cousin's coming at you from across the table. He is the CEO of Are You Garbage? He's an investment.

• 1:17H. Foley?

  He's an international businessman.

• 1:19Speaker 01

  I get you flustered, don't I?

• 1:20H. Foley?

  And my best pal in the whole wide world. Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan, because I was thinking of trying to explain to you.

• 1:26Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:27H. Foley?

  Why that joke didn't hit.

• 1:29Speaker 01

  Because it wasn't a joke. It was more of a statement.

• 1:31H. Foley?

  Which it's a joke in itself. If you kill a ladybug, that's bad luck.

• 1:35Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 1:35H. Foley?

  So she screwed you.

• 1:37Speaker 01

  Now I get it.

• 1:38H. Foley?

  So you don't know about that kind of stuff.

• 1:39Speaker 01

  Hey, hit the laughter. What's up, gang? Shout out to you. I got a bunch of gang laughter. Boo.

• 1:47Speaker 01

  What's up, gang?

• 1:48H. Foley?

  I was talking so fast because I was trying to explain that to you in my head and spit out, do my.

• 1:54Speaker 01

  Okay, now you're ruining the rest of the show. You ruined the Tootie. That's your fault. Now let me try to dig us out of this hole. Hey, your crab's in a barrel, buddy. Let me fly. Let me fly, baby. Uh, shout out to you. I got to do the goddamn business up here. We got me all flustered, man. Your ladybug stink is all over me. Make sure you rate, view, subscribe.

• 2:17H. Foley?

  Everybody got that out there.

• 2:19Speaker 01

  Listen, I understood it as a sentence, for sure. I didn't, I wasn't confused.

• 2:23H. Foley?

  And meaning that her and I are so crazy when it comes to that stuff, that, you know, now she's petrified because she's gonna die because she accidentally killed a lady.

• 2:31Speaker 01

  I'm pretty sure you killed a ladybug on your way here.

• 2:33H. Foley?

  I know.

• 2:34Speaker 01

  Talk about your seven years of bad luck starting that day.

• 2:36H. Foley?

  It was on Saturday night, I did it by accident.

• 2:38Speaker 01

  Okay, alright, now we're, alright, stop. Shout out, gang.

• 2:42H. Foley?

  His little tail came out. Once the tail, you know what I'm talking about? That little thing came out, I was like, aw man, I'm going straight to hell. So I wrote a tootie out of it.

• 2:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, should've bounced that off the fucking, should've bounced that off in the writers' meeting.

• 2:55H. Foley?

  Luke thought it was good, right?

• 2:56Speaker 01

  Nope. Guys, make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes, full video available on YouTube, also full video available over there on Spotify, and hit 'em, big man. Alright.

• 3:06Speaker 01

  I could've eaten you, bud.

• 3:08H. Foley?

  Look over, I'm crying.

• 3:09Speaker 01

  Obviously.

• 3:10H. Foley?

  I didn't mean it. We're climbing the charts over there, dickheads.

• 3:13Speaker 01

  The greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com, search "your garbage", you go over there, you get all that bonus content, gang, I'm talking episodes, hard feelings every week, which is the runaway hit.

• 3:25H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 3:25Speaker 01

  Bonus episodes AYG, all the bonus content from the past four or five years, whatever we've been banging over there. Uh, check that out. And then, the boys are hitting the road, I cannot wait. There's a little bit of chill in the air, we're getting back on the planes, we're getting back in the van, and we're going boots on the ground to meet the army of frigging garbage.

• 3:45H. Foley?

  Dear God, get me out of this dump. Let me get a couple of miles. Out of this city.

• 3:51Speaker 01

  Between you and the devil.

• 3:52H. Foley?

  I need the homies. I need the homies and the bozos, I need big, when you see them, I need a big hug. Alright.

• 3:58Speaker 01

  These guys fighting seven years of bad luck.

• 4:01H. Foley?

  I can't wait to get back out there.

• 4:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, get your tickets, uh, starting on the, first runs on the west coast, we got, uh, LA, Seattle, two shows in, uh, San Fran, and Portland. Get them tickies, and hang out with the boys.

• 4:15H. Foley?

  Yeah, come hang out with the boys. Speaking of which, you got a little family episode going here if you couldn't tell, just the boys, the bozos, and the homies. And before we get that started, let's take a little stroll by the corner office, and say what's up.

• 4:25Speaker 01

  What?

• 4:26H. Foley?

  Summer, it's all over. Back to school Luke, look at him over there huh?

• 4:30Speaker 03

  Had my pumpkin spice latte today.

• 4:32H. Foley?

  He did, he had your pumpkin spice latte, you did your US Open, you watched the uh.

• 4:37Speaker 01

  Little rich girl.

• 4:37H. Foley?

  You had a little finale of all your shows, your summer house and all that kinda stuff. Now look at you, now it's now it's back to school, right?

• 4:45Speaker 01

  When you're, what sorority are you pledging this year? I'm rushing data capa what whore?

• 4:51H. Foley?

  Did you get your high, high leather boots that you're gonna go apple picking in?

• 4:55Speaker 03

  Of course.

• 4:55H. Foley?

  And all that stuff?

• 4:56Speaker 03

  All the fall colors, red's in the season, boys.

• 4:59H. Foley?

  A little slut, look at him.

• 5:04H. Foley?

  What?

• 5:05Speaker 01

  You got ass on a brain.

• 5:06H. Foley?

  I can't play along? Tight body on that kid.

• 5:09Speaker 01

  Alright. Um. I got a little something I wanna, I wanna share with the class here.

• 5:15H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 5:17Speaker 01

  Now bend over and pull him apart.

• 5:21Speaker 01

  Um. I uh. Do you ever like, I was doing something where I was like, ah, this is genius. And then for like a couple of days. Afterwards, it hit me where I'm like, ah, this is, this might be, and I'm bringing this to the court.

• 5:39H. Foley?

  An invention, you had something?

• 5:40Speaker 01

  A little bit.

• 5:41H. Foley?

  See, I told you.

• 5:42Speaker 01

  You're not wrong, you did, you did mention it.

• 5:44H. Foley?

  Right?

• 5:44Speaker 01

  This isn't an invention though, this is just, alright, hold on. So as you know, uh, I have a baby.

• 5:49H. Foley?

  Yes.

• 5:50Speaker 01

  And uh, we sit on the couch, we have a puffy couch. It's a puffy couch, like, not like a, not a firm couch. You know what I mean?

• 5:59H. Foley?

  You just squish into it?

• 6:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's a little, a little softer couch more than a firmer couch.

• 6:04H. Foley?

  Would I like getting out of it?

• 6:05Speaker 01

  No.

• 6:05H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 6:06Speaker 01

  I'd like getting in it though, I tell you that. There's a sock or something. There's a lump in one of the cushions, I can't figure out what the hell is going, it's like a softball's in there, right in, right in your keister.

• 6:15H. Foley?

  Check it out, could be a key or something like that.

• 6:18Speaker 01

  So, I sit on the couch, you got a little pillow, goes on your lap, he leans on the pillow, you're feeding the bottle, whole nine yards.

• 6:26H. Foley?

  Oh yeah, you feed it what, you feed him over here? You don't sit him like this and give him the bottle?

• 6:30Speaker 01

  No, he sits on your lap. There's like a wedge pillow we bought.

• 6:33H. Foley?

  Oh, I gotcha.

• 6:34Speaker 01

  And he leans on that, stares at you, you just gotta do that. He's a big fat baby, you know what I mean?

• 6:40H. Foley?

  Right.

• 6:40Speaker 01

  Ninety-seven percent though, he ain't, he ain't light.

• 6:42H. Foley?

  Wait, is your arm on that thing and you're like that?

• 6:44Speaker 01

  No, he's just right there. You're hands, I'm hands free.

• 6:46H. Foley?

  Oh, really?

• 6:46Speaker 01

  Minus the one bottle.

• 6:47H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 6:47Speaker 01

  Minus, you know, so I got, you know, he is, this guy's eating fifteen, sixteen, he's like you, fifteen, sixteen times a day, he needs a bop-bop, you know what I mean? So, he, uh, and then you, you know, we have like our, a coffee, a nice coffee, whatever, you know what I mean? A water, you got the TV, you got the remote, you got your phone, cause you're spending a lot of time feeding this old guy.

• 7:09H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 7:10Speaker 01

  So you gotta, you know, I gotta be texting, I gotta be breaking your balls, I gotta be yelling at Luke, you know, the whole nine yards, whatever it is.

• 7:15H. Foley?

  A little command area.

• 7:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:17H. Foley?

  About how long does it take him to suck one of them down?

• 7:19Speaker 01

  Nah, it depends.

• 7:21H. Foley?

  Two seconds?

• 7:21Speaker 01

  Uh, nah, it depends, if he's really going at it, you know.

• 7:26H. Foley?

  It's like Tom the Cat with a cigarette?

• 7:28Speaker 01

  Anywhere, anywhere from ten to thirty minutes, call it.

• 7:31H. Foley?

  Thirty minutes?

• 7:32Speaker 01

  If he's, if he's, he might be a sleepyhead.

• 7:34H. Foley?

  What's he, watching a Seinfeld?

• 7:36Speaker 01

  Oh, we got, we got, he got programming on, you know what I mean? Likes that Joey Tribbiani.

• 7:41H. Foley?

  Have you shown him Seinfeld?

• 7:42Speaker 01

  No, I don't think so.

• 7:44H. Foley?

  What? That'd be the first thing I did. That's like, you know, when they play classical music in like a baby's crib?

• 7:50Speaker 01

  I do that.

• 7:51H. Foley?

  You should be showing him Seinfeld, buckles.

• 7:53Speaker 01

  We're riffing Jerry. Jerry, please!

• 7:57H. Foley?

  Get this kid funny.

• 7:58Speaker 01

  Can you get me on the Tonight Show? Um...

• 8:00H. Foley?

  Gotta move that car, girl.

• 8:02Speaker 01

  I can't do the voiceless.

• 8:03H. Foley?

  What about Jose Feliciano? That's the second time they mentioned him, I didn't realize he was blind.

• 8:08Speaker 01

  When, I don't, when's?

• 8:09H. Foley?

  At the record store. Jose Feliciano can't walk down the street and, uh, what's your call without getting mobbed?

• 8:14Speaker 01

  Well, that's his problem. That's what they got. All right.

• 8:17H. Foley?

  Screwing around.

• 8:18Speaker 01

  Um, so what I've been doing, cause I need a little station here, right?

• 8:23H. Foley?

  Uh-huh.

• 8:24Speaker 01

  Cause I got a bed, I got a bad armrest, a thinner armrest, I can get a cup of coffee on there, you know what I mean? But really balance it, not with him, if it's just me, or the dog, well, like, you know, so I need a, so I've been taking my cutting board and putting it next to me on the couch as a little... Luke, please. As a little station. Pretty good, right?

• 8:50H. Foley?

  It's a whack-ass cutting board.

• 8:52Speaker 01

  That thing's got some files on it.

• 8:54H. Foley?

  What the fuck, dude? Who'd you been chopping up on that thing? Look at that, it's like Freddy Krueger's fucking nightstand.

• 8:59Speaker 01

  It gets a lot of use. These Europeans like a lot of fresh produce. I'm more of a canned peas kinda guy.

• 9:06H. Foley?

  You're not cutting deep, someone's cutting with emotion. That's crazy, that thing's all sliced up.

• 9:12Speaker 01

  But the other day, um, uh, my cup smelled a little oniony. So like, I don't think I got it. I didn't get a good wash on the board.

• 9:21H. Foley?

  But that does always have a little garlic to it.

• 9:23Speaker 01

  Ah, yeah, that stuff stinks.

• 9:25H. Foley?

  I hate that.

• 9:26Speaker 01

  But...

• 9:27H. Foley?

  I see where you're going with this?

• 9:29Speaker 01

  Application wa- I'm not trying to oppress anybody, I'm not having company over.

• 9:33H. Foley?

  No.

• 9:33Speaker 01

  It is, I'm managing, but...

• 9:36H. Foley?

  What can we do with this?

• 9:38Speaker 01

  I've been, so we have a bigger, clean one, that's like a big one. And I've been using, I've upgraded. But this was the original prototype I wanted to share.

• 9:46H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 9:47Speaker 01

  And I think, it's not classy, it's trashy, I'm using a pretty, you know, arguably not super clean cutting board. It's clean, it's, you know, but whatever.

• 9:56H. Foley?

  I got you.

• 9:57Speaker 01

  It's got a little bit of stench to it.

• 9:59Speaker 01

  But I got a big, nice, clean one now, and that's like, that's like your little desk.

• 10:03H. Foley?

  That thing is sliced up.

• 10:05Speaker 01

  I know, it's jammed up, that's a whack-ass TV remote, dude. That TV stinks. It stinks, dude.

• 10:11H. Foley?

  Do you only get Ukrainian news on that? That thing is rough.

• 10:15Speaker 01

  I only get drone footage.

• 10:19Speaker 01

  It's bad. It's bad, uh, it's a bad TV. I've never met a slow, smart TV. This thing's been held back. You press like, "I wanna watch YouTube TV," it takes 20 minutes to load. It's so bad. Now Luke, would that be a TV thing? That's just a bad TV, cuz the internet's quick, fat, like all, like everything else streams, but...

• 10:39H. Foley?

  It's your data processing in your, in your smart TV.

• 10:42Speaker 01

  It's so slow.

• 10:43H. Foley?

  It's the RAM in your TV.

• 10:44Speaker 01

  Ah, I'm jammed up.

• 10:45H. Foley?

  Or ROM, whichever way you wanna say it.

• 10:47Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 10:48H. Foley?

  You know the difference between RAM and ROM?

• 10:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:51H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 10:52Speaker 01

  No religion.

• 10:55H. Foley?

  Do you know the difference between RAM and ROM?

• 10:56Speaker 01

  Uh, I don't think so.

• 10:59H. Foley?

  I never ROM'd it in your mouth. Nothing on that!

• 11:06H. Foley?

  Luke!

• 11:06Speaker 01

  I knew we were gonna go with it.

• 11:07H. Foley?

  That's computer, that's computer science lab humor right there.

• 11:11Speaker 01

  No wonder you failed out. Tell him, tell him Ms. Bressi, your teacher, "I'll ram it in your ass." No, I'll ram it in my ass.

• 11:20H. Foley?

  Wait, what? Hang on a second.

• 11:24H. Foley?

  Alright, if you're looking, first of all...

• 11:27Speaker 01

  I wouldn't, I wouldn't have this out when companies come, family, sure, but if I'm entertaining...

• 11:33H. Foley?

  Are you asking me what can we do with this as far as a product?

• 11:37Speaker 01

  No, I don't know why you keep thinking I wanna get into business with you.

• 11:40H. Foley?

  I think you do.

• 11:41Speaker 01

  We're already in business, and that's enough business. I don't need, I don't need side ventures.

• 11:48H. Foley?

  I was gonna tell you...

• 11:49Speaker 01

  Nope, I don't wanna know.

• 11:50H. Foley?

  They kinda have something like this already. They do. Cause a lot of people have, um, have soft ottomans now. You know what I mean?

• 11:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, but that's, I'm talk, I need something.

• 12:00H. Foley?

  That's like a TV tray, really, is what you got there.

• 12:03Speaker 01

  I'm not, listen, I'm not saying I'm...

• 12:05H. Foley?

  We could figure out something.

• 12:06Speaker 01

  No, listen, hey.

• 12:07H. Foley?

  We could.

• 12:08Speaker 01

  Hey, Mr. Wonderful, zip it, would ya?

• 12:10H. Foley?

  We could figure out something.

• 12:11Speaker 01

  I wanna get him on the show.

• 12:13H. Foley?

  How much would you want as an initial investment?

• 12:15Speaker 01

  From you?

• 12:16H. Foley?

  Yes.

• 12:16Speaker 01

  Okay, I didn't know you were bringing money to the table.

• 12:19H. Foley?

  I bring money to the table.

• 12:20Speaker 01

  I know you don't have it. Uh, I'm well aware.

• 12:23H. Foley?

  I need to borrow some after the show.

• 12:25Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 12:26H. Foley?

  How much would you want to try to get this thing off the ground?

• 12:29Speaker 01

  Well, I mean, I could easily just go buy wholesale cutting boards.

• 12:33H. Foley?

  We'll call it the couch board.

• 12:35Speaker 01

  Ooh, that's not bad.

• 12:37H. Foley?

  I got a nice, I have a beautiful couch board. I put everything on there right next to me.

• 12:41Speaker 01

  Couch table. No, Cass, I'm a little better than couch board. Let me do, let me do the brainstorming here.

• 12:46H. Foley?

  How much money do you want? Alright, you're coming to me.

• 12:49Speaker 01

  Ten grand.

• 12:50H. Foley?

  Okay, for ten grand, I would want a 50% investment in the company.

• 12:55Speaker 01

  No.

• 12:57H. Foley?

  And one of them baby bottles.

• 13:01Speaker 01

  He seems to like them so much. And I want you to feed me.

• 13:05H. Foley?

  See what that milk's all about. Talk to me. So what do you want to know here? Are you a dirtball?

• 13:14Speaker 01

  I, man, I'm just, my first time really getting eyes on that cutting board. In HD like that, that is jammed up.

• 13:21H. Foley?

  That rag ain't great either. Is that the baby, is that the baby rag or is that a kitchen?

• 13:24Speaker 01

  No, they're baby rags. Those things are all over the house.

• 13:28H. Foley?

  You need a booze.

• 13:30Speaker 01

  A booze?

• 13:30H. Foley?

  Booze. Booze cutting board.

• 13:33Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 13:34H. Foley?

  Didn't I tell you about this?

• 13:35Speaker 01

  We got a, we got a bunch of cutting boards. I'm not, no, that's fine. That's, that's the knock around board.

• 13:39H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 13:40Speaker 01

  That's, that is what it is.

• 13:41H. Foley?

  That thing's real trashy. That's like you made that in woodshop. That's thin too.

• 13:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, what you need, sometimes the heavy ones aren't, the heavy ones are... I got something like that. I don't, I don't need any of that.

• 13:54H. Foley?

  That's what I got.

• 13:54Speaker 01

  This is why you're broke. You're spending fifty-five dollars on a cutting board.

• 13:57H. Foley?

  A food freak.

• 13:58Speaker 01

  And then order Uber Eats.

• 13:59H. Foley?

  Food freak told me to get one. I got the exact...

• 14:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's a, he's a chef. You sir are no chef.

• 14:06H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 14:06Speaker 01

  Boyardee. Maybe.

• 14:09H. Foley?

  Um, yeah, I like that.

• 14:11Speaker 01

  Listen, if you're out there, if you're a single parent like me and you're out there struggling and you want to have your cup of coffee and not spill it, I recommend going cutting board, clean cutting board on a couch.

• 14:23H. Foley?

  Got your coffee in an old frying pan. And that way it doesn't, oh my god.

• 14:29Speaker 01

  What? Hit me.

• 14:30H. Foley?

  All this needs is...

• 14:33Speaker 01

  What do you got?

• 14:33H. Foley?

  A, it, it, there should be, um, a lip on it. That way if the coffee spilled, it wouldn't get all over the couch. It would stay in there.

• 14:42Speaker 01

  Not bad. That's like when my brother used to roll blunts in his car on an upside down frisbee.

• 14:49H. Foley?

  So it didn't go everywhere.

• 14:50Speaker 01

  So if he hit a fucking hard turn, it wa, he wouldn't lose the weed.

• 14:54H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 14:54Speaker 01

  Take that. See, the Ryans are, are generating ideas out here.

• 14:58H. Foley?

  I used to chop up my blow in a coffee cup so it wouldn't spill anywhere.

• 15:02Speaker 01

  Well, there you go.

• 15:04H. Foley?

  Remember one time I dropped a bag in the toilet? Think about it every day.

• 15:07Speaker 01

  First day I became a plumber.

• 15:11Speaker 01

  And that's how I started my apprenticeship, smash cut.

• 15:16H. Foley?

  Turned the water off in the city?

• 15:19Speaker 01

  Shut it down!

• 15:21H. Foley?

  Ripping the toilet out? They can't, once it gets wet, it's over.

• 15:25Speaker 01

  Why don't you dry it out?

• 15:26H. Foley?

  Nah, you can't.

• 15:27Speaker 01

  Guy like you. Uh, alright, that's neither here nor there, all your, uh, your past, uh, you know, discretion, missteps.

• 15:35Speaker 03

  Are, are all your mugs Starbucks mugs? Just out of curiosity?

• 15:38Speaker 01

  Uh, I bought a lot of them.

• 15:41H. Foley?

  Where?

• 15:42Speaker 01

  Where the fuck do you think I bought the Starbucks?

• 15:44H. Foley?

  At Starbucks?

• 15:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 15:45H. Foley?

  What do you mean?

• 15:47Speaker 01

  Me, me and Ryan D. talk about this a lot.

• 15:48H. Foley?

  You're calling him a bitch and you're buying mugs at Starbucks?

• 15:52Speaker 01

  They're engineered by people, by the smartest people in the coffee industry. What are you talking about?

• 15:57H. Foley?

  Dyson's not doing them. What are you talking about?

• 16:00Speaker 01

  Dyson's not in the coffee industry.

• 16:01H. Foley?

  They're engineered. It's a regular coffee cup.

• 16:04Speaker 01

  No, it's not.

• 16:05H. Foley?

  That's a girl move. You buy the little thermoses too with the little bedazzled on them?

• 16:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, I have the one that I bring that's a collaboration with Farm Rio. It's got flowers all over it, and I was thinking that you've called me out, you've seen it. You called me out on them. I like the functionality of them, it's fantastic. They're designed perfectly by people who's, no one sells more coffee than Starbucks.

• 16:28H. Foley?

  Is that true?

• 16:29Speaker 01

  I'm sure.

• 16:30H. Foley?

  Who sells the most coffee in the world?

• 16:32Speaker 01

  Not in the world. I didn't stipulate the world. The greater tri-state area, it's gotta be Starbucks.

• 16:39H. Foley?

  Tim Hortons.

• 16:39Speaker 01

  It ain't Gregory's or Jeffries.

• 16:40Speaker 03

  Starbucks.

• 16:41H. Foley?

  Is it?

• 16:42Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:42H. Foley?

  In the world?

• 16:44Speaker 01

  Who's even close to being bigger? There's no Tim Hortons in fucking America, probably one in Buffalo, traitor ass. I'm kidding.

• 16:52H. Foley?

  I like Tim Hortons.

• 16:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's fine. There's no Beesers. But listen.

• 16:56Speaker 03

  Starbucks does 31.6 billion, Dunkin' does 11.9 billion.

• 17:01H. Foley?

  Damn!

• 17:01Speaker 01

  Dunkin', listen, I grew up, I was a extra, extra, that was my, can I get an extra large, extra sugar, extra cream at Dunkin'? That was my order. That's what got me...

• 17:12Speaker 03

  Extra crawler.

• 17:14Speaker 01

  An extra dozen doughnuts.

• 17:17Speaker 01

  An extra set of dinkies.

• 17:20H. Foley?

  Okay, but something about Trade Coffee.

• 17:22Speaker 01

  Trade Coffee.

• 17:23H. Foley?

  The best coffee in the business. You know, you know, I'm a season guy. It's starting to cool down a little bit. The fall's coming in. Nothing like a warm, cozy, soothing cup of hot coffee. And when you're reaching for your coffee, do yourself a favor. Get over to Trade. The best coffee in the world.

• 17:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, uh, as you guys may or may not know, we're a big coffee crew.

• 17:44H. Foley?

  Coffee.

• 17:44Speaker 01

  Big coffee.

• 17:45H. Foley?

  Drink coffee with our coffee.

• 17:47Speaker 01

  Buddy, we get it. We, we, we, we make it in-house. We get it on the road. We bebop. We scat.

• 17:52H. Foley?

  Coffee.

• 17:53Speaker 01

  Uh, Trade is the number one coffee destination in the U.S. for both hot and cold coffee drinkers. And boy, we got both on the team.

• 17:59H. Foley?

  I'm a hot man, you're a cold man. Ooh, I forgot about the cold brew.

• 18:03Speaker 01

  Uh, they source the best beans from over 50 top roasters across the U.S. Um, they even have easy to use curated gear so you can brew at home with better flavor and value than any other cafe or bottled cold brew that you're gonna find on the market.

• 18:17H. Foley?

  That's right.

• 18:17Speaker 01

  Trade's prices are on par with grocery store brands. Plus, the quality is next level, baby. Whether it's smooth cold brew or a cozy hot cup to start your day. Plus, you're supporting local roasters with every cup. It's a win-win. Right now, Trade is offering 50% off a one-month trial at drinktrade.com/garbage. That's drinktrade.com/garbage. You get 50% off one month. drinktrade.com/garbage. Do it.

• 18:43H. Foley?

  Okay, we gotta talk about Thrive.

• 18:45Speaker 01

  Shout out to Thrive.

• 18:46H. Foley?

  I like that Thrive market.

• 18:47Speaker 01

  Who don't like that?

• 18:48H. Foley?

  They got good stuff. It's wholesome. It's delicious. Those chips they sent over.

• 18:53Speaker 01

  Listen.

• 18:54H. Foley?

  They're better. They're, they're, they're, they're a million times crispier and crunchier.

• 18:58Speaker 01

  I know.

• 18:59H. Foley?

  Than the leading brand that comes in that same kinda container.

• 19:02Speaker 01

  Easy does it there, big dog. You're gonna get the, they're gonna have the suits all over. There'll be red tape all over.

• 19:07H. Foley?

  If you want delicious, wholesome, fantastic snacks, get over to Thrive, man. They put the basket together for you. It's real nice. And I'll tell you what else, too. They had the, they were, they were, they were gluten-free, uh, cookies.

• 19:21Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 19:22H. Foley?

  That had like, they were like oatmeal. Dude, they were unbelievable.

• 19:25Speaker 01

  Listen, all, all, all's marketing aside, Thrive sends us packages that the boys hit.

• 19:35Speaker 01

  Like raccoons. It's crazy. These boxes come and everybody goes, "What's that?" Someone goes, "Thrive," and they converge on it. The snacks are that good. They're that high quality. You can cut out artificial dyes, processed sugar, seed oils, all that kind of stuff. The stuff at the regular store is junk. Thrive's got the good stuff.

• 19:58H. Foley?

  It's all chemicals over there. Thrive, all natural and delicious. What do you want to do?

• 20:03Speaker 01

  They got from seven sundaes to snack packs, the healthy swaps for your on-the-go lifestyle, right here. Go to ThriveMarket.com/garbage to get 30% off your first order and a free $60 gift. That's ThriveMarket.com/garbage. Do it.

• 20:23H. Foley?

  You liked the munchkin, didn't you, fatty?

• 20:25Speaker 01

  Man, no, I would get, man...

• 20:27H. Foley?

  Stuff in your cheeks like a squirrel.

• 20:29Speaker 01

  I remember being my fattish, driving to work with an Arizona iced tea, bacon, egg and cheese, or it would be a sausage, egg and cheese, because I like the density of sausage, egg and cheese.

• 20:41H. Foley?

  And one of those solo cups of munchkins that they started doing?

• 20:43Speaker 01

  Aw, man. They had to check out.

• 20:47H. Foley?

  Trashy shit I haven't seen in my life.

• 20:49Speaker 01

  Talk about an impulse buy.

• 20:53H. Foley?

  Let me get a handful.

• 20:55Speaker 01

  A little bit of walking, a couple of walking around munchkins.

• 20:57H. Foley?

  Those things are instant heartburn. Especially with an Arizona.

• 21:01Speaker 01

  I had them. They were down the shore. I guess the last time I was down, I saw the kids had them, and I mean, I crushed about... Well, the kids didn't like the chocolate ones, I guess. They're young kids. They don't know. That's a different kind of cake. You know what I mean? Yeah, no, two and a quarter, two and two.

• 21:19H. Foley?

  Crazy.

• 21:22Speaker 01

  And there was about seven of them in there, man. And I did the one, and then like,

• 21:28Speaker 01

  woke up and I had four more in my mouth at the same time.

• 21:30H. Foley?

  Ha, once you start walking down that road.

• 21:34Speaker 01

  But I would do the, I'd sit in a BP parking lot. Those are the trashiest Dunkin' Donuts, the ones that are in gas stations.

• 21:42H. Foley?

  Oh.

• 21:42Speaker 01

  No one else is doing that.

• 21:43H. Foley?

  With a basket of Robins hooked on to them and maybe a Taco Bell?

• 21:46Speaker 01

  Or a Togo's.

• 21:48H. Foley?

  What's a Togo's?

• 21:50Speaker 01

  T O G O's.

• 21:51H. Foley?

  Shoe place?

• 21:52Speaker 01

  No. That was, uh, for my, my, members of my extended family had a brief stint in franchising, uh, and it was a, it was a, it was a Togo's of, uh, or was it a T C B Y? What the hell was that?

• 22:06H. Foley?

  T C B Y was banging for a second.

• 22:08Speaker 01

  Was that ice cream?

• 22:09H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 22:09Speaker 01

  I don't remember.

• 22:10H. Foley?

  Frozen yogurt.

• 22:11Speaker 01

  Um, anywho, I would sit there, uh, be in the gas station of the BP. I remember I'd get gas and then eat, and I'd be like, I can taste the fucking petrol on me hands, and I'd have some of them tots, which there's not enough of them, but that's neither here nor there. I don't have time to get into. But that's why Dunkin's slipping, and I like a dark coffee. I do. Dunkin' got me into coffee. Wawa on Dunkin' got me into coffee. I go get a, I try to order a dark roast at some of these places, because I like the, they're called-

• 22:38H. Foley?

  Likes it strong.

• 22:39Speaker 01

  I like it strong. And they go, oh, every time I go there, we don't have it brewed. I go, I'm trying to, I'm trying to help you out against Starbucks. I'm trying.

• 22:46H. Foley?

  He's a Pike man. He's a Pike.

• 22:49Speaker 01

  Or dark.

• 22:49H. Foley?

  Pike dark roast.

• 22:50Speaker 01

  My wife got me on dark roast now.

• 22:51H. Foley?

  Yeah, Pike dark roast.

• 22:52Speaker 01

  Pike's in the middle.

• 22:53H. Foley?

  Is it?

• 22:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 22:54H. Foley?

  Wow, you are an expert. Listen, when you go into Starbucks, you're getting a-

• 22:59Speaker 01

  That mug, but hold on, that mug-

• 23:01H. Foley?

  You're buying that retail, you're saying, let me get this.

• 23:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:04H. Foley?

  And then where do you go with it? You take it right home?

• 23:06Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 23:07H. Foley?

  Huh.

• 23:09Speaker 01

  That, there's no-

• 23:09H. Foley?

  I've never seen you do something like that.

• 23:11Speaker 01

  I, maybe it's a new me, you know, new horizon.

• 23:14H. Foley?

  He says you have a bunch of them. I've never been to Starbucks with you where you bought something in retail, where you bought a thermos.

• 23:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:20H. Foley?

  I only seen chicks do that shit. They buy whatever's in season.

• 23:24Speaker 01

  It's not in season, it's functional. I, listen-

• 23:27H. Foley?

  Do you know what I'm saying here?

• 23:28Speaker 01

  Can I, yeah, and you're not letting me explain myself. I have been to Starbucks other times-

• 23:32H. Foley?

  Your girly behavior.

• 23:33Speaker 01

  First of all, we're naming three times I-

• 23:35H. Foley?

  Say I'm gay.

• 23:35Speaker 01

  I bought some, I'm not saying that to comment, sorry, and I'm pretty sure you are. Uh, uh-

• 23:43H. Foley?

  You look good.

• 23:44Speaker 01

  I've been in, uh, I went to, uh, I've, three times I've made these purchases out of necessity.

• 23:48H. Foley?

  So you don't have a bunch of them?

• 23:50Speaker 01

  I do. The one time I went in and bought like five.

• 23:53H. Foley?

  Five mugs.

• 23:54Speaker 01

  I like the mug. I don't know, it's bigger than most mugs.

• 23:58H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 23:58Speaker 01

  It holds better, the handle's good, it sits well, it holds more ca- I don't know how else to explain it.

• 24:03H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 24:04Speaker 01

  It's a better mug than the mugs I have at my ha- than a normal standard coffee mug.

• 24:08H. Foley?

  I don't wanna be a contrarian, it's something that I'm not used to and, and, and it's nice to hear that, uh, you know. It's nice to talk to somebody that does different things than I do, and I, I, I appreciate it. Maybe I'll start doing that.

• 24:20Speaker 01

  I know, now you're stealing my ideas. You're just copying me, like you do.

• 24:23H. Foley?

  I'll get the ones from Dunkin' Donuts.

• 24:25Speaker 01

  There you go. Fill them with munchkins. I get ten mugs. Fill with jelly donuts.

• 24:32H. Foley?

  I don't think Dunkin' Donuts has that kinda shit. I don't think they have-

• 24:35Speaker 01

  They don't, that's why they're only doing eleven billion dollars a year. Most of that money's mug money for me.

• 24:41H. Foley?

  They do, probably do do a lot in retail.

• 24:44Speaker 01

  Food too.

• 24:45H. Foley?

  Starbucks?

• 24:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think the CEO of Starbucks stepped down as the CEO of Starbucks to then just focus on, um...

• 24:52H. Foley?

  Mugs?

• 24:52Speaker 01

  The food aspect of it. The cafe, like to really get the cafe booming.

• 24:57H. Foley?

  I got it.

• 24:57Speaker 01

  Um, whatever, all that's neither here nor there.

• 24:59H. Foley?

  They got that egg white, uh, feta wrap.

• 25:03Speaker 01

  Yep, you like a handful of them.

• 25:08H. Foley?

  Put those in a solo cup. Poor Dunkin' Donuts, that sucks.

• 25:12Speaker 01

  They're managing.

• 25:14H. Foley?

  Eleven billion a year?

• 25:15Speaker 01

  It's pretty good.

• 25:15H. Foley?

  That's still pretty good.

• 25:16Speaker 01

  You think? That's still not enough for you. You'd figure out a way to spend that.

• 25:20H. Foley?

  Yeah. Yeah, well-

• 25:22Speaker 01

  You're like Tyson in the nineties, dude.

• 25:26Speaker 01

  Talk about blowing cash.

• 25:28H. Foley?

  I know how to get rid of half of that right now.

• 25:32Speaker 01

  Invest in my couchboards. I dumped eleven bill in couchboards.

• 25:36H. Foley?

  Couchboard. A couchboard.

• 25:38Speaker 01

  Coming to a Bed Bath & Beyond, near you.

• 25:40H. Foley?

  We could. Now, now it's out there, everybody knows it. Who's defunct?

• 25:43Speaker 01

  Bed Bath & Beyond. Right? Somebody bought them, or like, uh, somebody bought their inventory.

• 25:48H. Foley?

  They gave everything away. Those goddamn coupons.

• 25:52Speaker 01

  Retail just kinda went out of, out of, all that stuff that you can get at Bed Bath & Beyond, Amazon have at your door in fucking, uh, twenty-four hours.

• 25:59H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 26:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're only online now.

• 26:03H. Foley?

  Well, that's not going out of business.

• 26:05Speaker 01

  No, they went out of business.

• 26:06Speaker 03

  They went out of business, someone bought that.

• 26:07Speaker 01

  Hey, guy, I know.

• 26:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:08H. Foley?

  Oh, sorry. Jimmy Buffett, I don't know.

• 26:13Speaker 01

  Hey, parrots. Go birds. He just looked me up and down to try to shit on me. I caught ya. I caught you fucking scale from the forehead down to the tootsie-wootsies to try to hit me. What did you have, it was about the jacket or pants or something?

• 26:28H. Foley?

  It's a nice jacket.

• 26:32Speaker 01

  Your hair coming in.

• 26:34H. Foley?

  Lost a little bit of weight, got a nice jacket on, I know where to go.

• 26:37Speaker 01

  What's shopping nice for you?

• 26:39H. Foley?

  Shopping? What do you mean, going shopping?

• 26:42Speaker 01

  I guess you're a little pegged down due to your current girth. But if you were a normal svelte man, what would be a nice store you'd like to hit?

• 26:52H. Foley?

  For, to buy?

• 26:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, you're like, I need to buy like a nice...

• 26:55H. Foley?

  Toys R Us?

• 26:56Speaker 01

  No, clothes. Why would you have to be thin to shop at Toys R Us?

• 27:00H. Foley?

  You don't, which is why it's awesome.

• 27:04H. Foley?

  I love a good, you know what I love is a good hobby store. Walk in by and find a good hobby store. They have the little...

• 27:09Speaker 01

  For a guy who has no hobbies.

• 27:11H. Foley?

  No, but they have the little diecast metal planes, like old World War II planes and stuff like that.

• 27:16Speaker 01

  That's cool, dude.

• 27:17H. Foley?

  That's fun. And like, uh...

• 27:18Speaker 01

  No, it's not.

• 27:19H. Foley?

  They have Gundam stuff, you know Gundam?

• 27:22Speaker 01

  Gundam style?

• 27:24Speaker 01

  Like that guy who shoots out?

• 27:25H. Foley?

  It's like Japanese Transformers kinda, but they're in space. I can't really follow the cartoons because they're dubbed in, I don't know what the hell they're saying. But they look like, they look like, uh, F-14 Tomcats and they kinda transform into, uh, like huge space robots. And guys pilot them. And they're cool looking.

• 27:44H. Foley?

  What was your question?

• 27:44Speaker 01

  Gay and a virgin, huh?

• 27:48Speaker 01

  Best of both worlds.

• 27:49H. Foley?

  Amen, sister.

• 27:50Speaker 01

  Where would you go to shop nice?

• 27:52H. Foley?

  To buy nice, like...

• 27:53Speaker 01

  I don't understand, you're not understanding why you're giving me attitude with...

• 27:55H. Foley?

  Like, when I lose all the weight?

• 27:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, and you're like, hey, I gotta...

• 27:58H. Foley?

  Brooks Brothers.

• 27:59Speaker 01

  Okay, there you go.

• 28:00H. Foley?

  Burberry.

• 28:01Speaker 01

  You're not shopping at.

• 28:02H. Foley?

  Yes, I am. I want to get a nice, one thing I want is a Burberry button down that Liam Gallagher had.

• 28:08Speaker 01

  Okay. All right. That's good.

• 28:09H. Foley?

  Like the classic Burberry style.

• 28:12Speaker 03

  Like with all the checks?

• 28:13H. Foley?

  Checks.

• 28:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's, they're famous for their checked.

• 28:15H. Foley?

  Plaid or whatever.

• 28:16Speaker 01

  Plaid, yeah. They call that checked. Plaid is bigger. I think checked is smaller.

• 28:20H. Foley?

  Yeah, I want one of those.

• 28:21Speaker 01

  I, uh.

• 28:22H. Foley?

  What, what, what, what do those cost?

• 28:24Speaker 03

  Uh, 600.

• 28:25Speaker 01

  What? Are you serious?

• 28:27Speaker 03

  Quick goo, yeah.

• 28:28H. Foley?

  Damn.

• 28:28Speaker 01

  Are they that expen- Burberry's that expensive?

• 28:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're back in the streets.

• 28:32Speaker 01

  Get out of here. You know what? I go middle, I go high end for me. Banana Republic. This is banana. I feel classy. I feel ni- I can wear this to a nice dinner.

• 28:43H. Foley?

  It's trash.

• 28:47H. Foley?

  No, I don't know. I wouldn't even know. I don't know.

• 28:49Speaker 01

  I'm just asking.

• 28:49H. Foley?

  Uh, Brooks Brothers?

• 28:51Speaker 01

  Okay, that's, that's your answer. That's because your brother used to shop there.

• 28:54H. Foley?

  Yeah, what are.

• 28:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's fine.

• 28:55H. Foley?

  Barney's?

• 28:57Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 28:58H. Foley?

  Think they're closed.

• 28:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm just, that's fine. You've answered.

• 29:01H. Foley?

  I'd go to one of them joints downtown on, uh, Prince Street or something like that. One of them designer places. Right?

• 29:07Speaker 03

  You like Farady?

• 29:08H. Foley?

  No, you like Farady. Farady's a ripoff. That shit's crazy.

• 29:12Speaker 01

  Sponsor? What are you doing? No?

• 29:13H. Foley?

  No, they're not.

• 29:13Speaker 01

  Okay. Not this week anyway. Suck it.

• 29:18Speaker 01

  You snooze, you lose, boners.

• 29:20H. Foley?

  Make with the check, thork.

• 29:22Speaker 01

  Easy does it. I'm not going into business with you. You're taking us.

• 29:27H. Foley?

  No, I'd go to one of the designer places down on, uh, Spring Street or whatever it is. You know what I'm talking about?

• 29:32Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:32Speaker 01

  You don't know what you're talking about.

• 29:34Speaker 03

  Go to Kiff?

• 29:35H. Foley?

  What's that? What is that?

• 29:36Speaker 01

  No, I don't want to kiss you.

• 29:38H. Foley?

  What is that? I see, everybody's advertising. Is that a chocolate company? What?

• 29:43Speaker 01

  Can I get my, can I get my, your gay joke? Why don't you come over here so I can kiss you? Ladies and gentlemen.

• 29:51H. Foley?

  What is Kiff?

• 29:52Speaker 01

  No, it's not a chocolate company. You know it's a clothing company.

• 29:54H. Foley?

  I didn't know that.

• 29:55Speaker 01

  And I don't know. I just know rich guys wear it.

• 29:56H. Foley?

  Schultz's been pushing it.

• 29:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, if Schultz's knowing it, I don't know it.

• 29:59H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 30:01Speaker 01

  That's not my...

• 30:02H. Foley?

  Just think, Schultz knows about so many things I've never even heard of. Just classy, rich guy stuff. Boy, weight loss, something like that.

• 30:13Speaker 01

  I was gonna say...

• 30:14H. Foley?

  I'd go to one of them designers, one of them small shops downtown.

• 30:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's, but you're just saying a place that has historically had fashionable clothes for the past 50 years. You don't know. I asked you a name, you said Brick's Brothers, that's the answer.

• 30:26H. Foley?

  Schmeltons.

• 30:28Speaker 01

  I love their stuff.

• 30:31H. Foley?

  I don't know, some cool new designer down there, I'd wear his stuff for free. I'd say, you know, "I'll wear your stuff."

• 30:39Speaker 01

  Who were you?

• 30:40H. Foley?

  Just, you know, to get the word out there. I'm not paying for it.

• 30:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, no.

• 30:45H. Foley?

  I could end up with like some hot broad and like a fucking, uh, uh, um, a fashion coordinator.

• 30:53H. Foley?

  I'd do a European accent, get free clothes.

• 30:57H. Foley?

  And go get some of them munchkins.

• 31:01Speaker 01

  You've talked ever so... Uh, okay, all right, listen.

• 31:05H. Foley?

  Amber Crombie and Finch. That's what I'd do.

• 31:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, okay. Banana Republic.

• 31:10H. Foley?

  The Gap, I wish I could, I wish I could wear Gap. I wish, I wish I could walk into The Gap on a Saturday afternoon and gra- and grab an outfit for tonight. You know what I mean?

• 31:19Speaker 01

  You could.

• 31:19H. Foley?

  I know, I, you know.

• 31:20Speaker 01

  I've been asking you.

• 31:22H. Foley?

  What do you mean?

• 31:22Speaker 01

  I've been doing that for five years.

• 31:24H. Foley?

  I can't.

• 31:25Speaker 01

  Are you, you gotta try harder.

• 31:27H. Foley?

  No, no, I mean, yeah, I have to lose weight before I do that.

• 31:30Speaker 01

  No, I know.

• 31:32Speaker 01

  I've been asking you to lose weight for five years.

• 31:33H. Foley?

  Yeah, like a nice, go down there and buy like a nice jean jacket in the fall. You know? I look forward to that. I'm on, is that bound? I'm on it.

• 31:44Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 31:45H. Foley?

  Don't worry about me, folks.

• 31:47Speaker 01

  Um, all right, listen.

• 31:49H. Foley?

  Go ahead.

• 31:49Speaker 01

  All that's neither here nor there.

• 31:52H. Foley?

  I'm trying to do a program here.

• 31:53Speaker 01

  Trying to do a gosh darn family episode, we gotta get to the bread.

• 31:56H. Foley?

  Talking about your lame ideas and bad cutting boards.

• 31:59Speaker 01

  You just said it was a great idea and wanted to invest money in it. Trying to lowball you. I gotta beat you up in the negotiation. Uh.

• 32:09H. Foley?

  I'm glad you walk all over.

• 32:10Speaker 01

  Guys, as you know, when you join the old Patreon, the greatest upside in the world, we'll answer your garbage question on the air.

• 32:16H. Foley?

  Yes, sir.

• 32:16Speaker 01

  Uh, this one's from, uh, speaking of clothing, this one's from Foley's Goodfellows Briefs.

• 32:21H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 32:22Speaker 01

  Are you still rocking the Goodfellows?

• 32:23H. Foley?

  No, I'm out of them. I'm on, um, uh, I think they're, uh, Harbor Bay or DXL brand. Either way, I went one too big and they're like real loose on me. They're not great.

• 32:38Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 32:38H. Foley?

  Yeah, but I have so many of them. I've just been using them.

• 32:41Speaker 01

  Sure, I'm with that. Uh, $10 swim trunks tailor, never had one read. Is it garbage to set your relationship status on Facebook to divorced? Dude, you, I mean, that's, that is a thing. That is jammed up, but there was a time, I mean, Facebook's not big in our lives anymore, but there was a time when, whether it's, it's complicated in a relationship, single, date, like.

• 33:05H. Foley?

  Nobody pays attention to that anymore, though.

• 33:07Speaker 01

  I think these older, like people like my mom's age, like that generation, I think the, the, the baby boomers are, that's their.

• 33:14H. Foley?

  Jerry got divorced.

• 33:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, divorced. That's, that's like, that's where they get their information, you know? But that is, but you gotta let them know, but divorced, you could just say single. You don't need divorce from that whore, Mary.

• 33:28H. Foley?

  Well, I think when you, when you put divorced, it sends the signal to the broads that you're not looking for anything serious, but you're looking to have fun.

• 33:41Speaker 01

  I'm out there. You're trolling.

• 33:43H. Foley?

  Right?

• 33:43Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 33:44H. Foley?

  Divorced.

• 33:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, but so does.

• 33:45H. Foley?

  No complications. I want something casual.

• 33:49Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 33:49H. Foley?

  Not looking to get tied down with anything. Don't want anybody breaking my balls anymore.

• 33:53Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 33:53H. Foley?

  Busting chops.

• 33:54Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 33:55H. Foley?

  Want to have a good time, do some kinky shit, go out to dinner and that's it.

• 34:02Speaker 01

  Okay. Alright. And that, then that one's over.

• 34:06H. Foley?

  If you ask me.

• 34:07Speaker 01

  Sure, yeah, totally.

• 34:08H. Foley?

  In my opinion. I'm just guessing.

• 34:11Speaker 01

  You're not on Facebook anymore, are you? It's kinda funny, I go, but, I, I check my, uh, I'll check the-

• 34:16H. Foley?

  I'm just, I'm just, I'm just trying to, you know, I'm just imagining what the mindset of somebody in that situation might be thinking.

• 34:23Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 34:24H. Foley?

  You know what I mean?

• 34:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 34:25H. Foley?

  You know what I mean?

• 34:27Speaker 01

  I, I know, I picked up on it, it was pretty, pretty well detailed.

• 34:34H. Foley?

  I'm guessing you-

• 34:35Speaker 01

  I know, you're just guessing.

• 34:37H. Foley?

  You know?

• 34:38Speaker 01

  I'll go back and look at Facebook memories of like the last 15 years and like I would've made a status or what, you know, eh, something, something, drinking beers, very, you know, whatever, out getting smashed at the whatever.

• 34:49H. Foley?

  Where did you-

• 34:50Speaker 01

  Whatever, it was like down the shore, be like, "Tully nuts tonight," "Meet me at Kenan's," all that kinda shit.

• 34:55H. Foley?

  Who's meeting you?

• 34:56Speaker 01

  At that point, you were talking to like, the other people that were down the shore from Buck County. It would be like, "Oh, I saw somebody be like headed down the shore," and I'd go, "Oh, I saw fucking Luke's down, let's hit him up."

• 35:10Speaker 01

  And you would always comment some jerk off response.

• 35:13H. Foley?

  Me?

• 35:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. "No one cares dude," and I'm like, "You're 40, shitting on me." And I'm trying to have some friends.

• 35:21H. Foley?

  I would?

• 35:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:22H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 35:22Speaker 01

  Sometimes you'd be nice and supportive, other times you'd be a real bitch.

• 35:27H. Foley?

  Quite the bastard, huh? I was drinking back then.

• 35:30Speaker 01

  Still am. Uh, alright, let's see. I think about our relationship.

• 35:40Speaker 01

  So, long, long relationship.

• 35:44H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 35:44Speaker 01

  And just so insane at times. It's wild how for 15 years, as crazy as we've each been at moments in time-

• 35:56H. Foley?

  Crazy.

• 35:57Speaker 01

  We've each been on the same page. Like, there's always this, "Wanna go too far out, eh, whatever," like, wanna get too nuts, wanna go too crazy, but like, we can always fucking slap the other one and go right back to like this standard vibration of crazy, you know what I mean?

• 36:10H. Foley?

  Love you, dog.

• 36:13H. Foley?

  We get that fucking couch board off the ground?

• 36:16Speaker 01

  Nothing but green lights. Meet me at Kenan's, dog. I didn't have one tully nut this goddamn summer.

• 36:23H. Foley?

  That's good.

• 36:24Speaker 01

  No.

• 36:24H. Foley?

  Yes, it is.

• 36:25Speaker 01

  Uh-uh.

• 36:26H. Foley?

  It's good.

• 36:26Speaker 01

  Bad.

• 36:26H. Foley?

  No, it's good.

• 36:27Speaker 01

  Bad.

• 36:28H. Foley?

  It's good.

• 36:28Speaker 01

  Well, no.

• 36:29H. Foley?

  It's time to turn the leaf, man.

• 36:30Speaker 01

  I have. I'm down to wait. I got the Banana Republic jacket.

• 36:34H. Foley?

  That's why you're inspiring me. Don't have any tully nuts. I need you to stay strong for me.

• 36:39Speaker 01

  Uh-uh.

• 36:39H. Foley?

  I'm falling right behind you.

• 36:40Speaker 01

  I'm already picking a weekend on the road. I'm gonna get back on the heaters. You'll see me when you see me. There's gonna be a weekend where I get on the heaters for the weekend. Don't tell my wife. Chicken sandwiches. This is a very public chicken sandwiches. These should be reserved for Patreon. Um, but I'm trying, but I need a little bit of... I'm not drinking with this goddamn kid because there's a hangover, taking care of a baby hungover. You know, that ain't easy.

• 37:06H. Foley?

  I'm just tired of... I'm just bored with... I'm bored with everything I've been doing. I need to do something different.

• 37:10Speaker 01

  We gotta go out and have some pops together. We haven't had drinks in a while.

• 37:14H. Foley?

  I don't want pops.

• 37:15Speaker 01

  Well, me and Luke will have drinks. You can watch us.

• 37:18H. Foley?

  No pops. Done with the pops. I'm drunk enough. Yeah.

• 37:23Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 37:24H. Foley?

  Bored with myself.

• 37:26Speaker 01

  Well...

• 37:26H. Foley?

  Does that make sense?

• 37:27Speaker 01

  We have a... We might have a very fun recreational project coming up.

• 37:30H. Foley?

  I'm down with that.

• 37:31Speaker 01

  I know. Just save it. You gotta tease it a little bit.

• 37:35H. Foley?

  I'm down with that, man.

• 37:36Speaker 01

  I am down.

• 37:37H. Foley?

  I like that.

• 37:37Speaker 01

  If you think I'm not having pops.

• 37:38H. Foley?

  Getting out of the house, living life, having fun.

• 37:41Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 37:42H. Foley?

  Fall. I love it.

• 37:44Speaker 01

  New season. Big man.

• 37:45H. Foley?

  New season.

• 37:46Speaker 01

  Big man's good. All right.

• 37:47H. Foley?

  Best fall ever.

• 37:49Speaker 01

  After the worst summer.

• 37:50H. Foley?

  Fucking worst summer. Summer of 25. Man, they should have hung me at some point.

• 37:57Speaker 01

  A lot of rope. A lot of steel.

• 38:00H. Foley?

  It's from the highwaymen. They hung me in the spring of 25.

• 38:05Speaker 01

  Um, alright, this one's from James.

• 38:07H. Foley?

  It's a good song.

• 38:07Speaker 01

  Twenty dollar homie, never had one read. Are you garbage if the cheap hotel you're staying at, you see a family at the pool using the emergency lifesaving floaty as their kids floating for fun? That's jammed up. But I kinda respect it.

• 38:22H. Foley?

  You know how many times I wanted to use that chair that gets in and out?

• 38:25Speaker 01

  Oh, I've used that.

• 38:26H. Foley?

  Have ya?

• 38:27Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. I like a fucking courtyard Marriott. Yeah, I've played around on that.

• 38:31H. Foley?

  Really?

• 38:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, why not?

• 38:32H. Foley?

  Wait, did you have some-

• 38:33Speaker 01

  The only one in the pool, you know, we've done it in front of ya, I would assume. I've done it on the road.

• 38:37H. Foley?

  Where are those controls?

• 38:39Speaker 01

  It's on it, I believe.

• 38:40H. Foley?

  Oh, really?

• 38:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a little joystick.

• 38:42H. Foley?

  Oh, I didn't know that.

• 38:45Speaker 01

  Well, it's just like a button up. It's like an up and down arrow.

• 38:47H. Foley?

  I always looked at that, I don't know. I never wanted to touch that.

• 38:51Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 38:51H. Foley?

  Felt like it was bad luck or something. But I always wanted to play with it.

• 38:56Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm. Yeah. Um, but that is, that's not even, that's sad. Listen, you're at a, you're at a seedy motel. Been there. Get that. Not judging that. That happens. Scraped together, you're hanging out with the kids, for whatever reason. Maybe a vacation, maybe you're in town visiting family, whatever, whatever.

• 39:13H. Foley?

  Or you gotta get the fuck out of town and you couldn't leave the kids with somebody because they might go to that house and fucking kill them.

• 39:19Speaker 01

  Phew, talk about a, talk about a bad summer.

• 39:24Speaker 01

  Whatever. Whatever the circumstances of your life are, you're at a motel, you're making it work.

• 39:27H. Foley?

  You're on the run!

• 39:29Speaker 01

  It's just, the kid's got a, that's not a fun floaty device. That's like hard plastic, you know?

• 39:35H. Foley?

  It's real good, though. Keeps you up there. You can hang on that thing.

• 39:38Speaker 01

  You know what I always wanted? The, uh, the Baywatch can. The, the red can.

• 39:43H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah.

• 39:44Speaker 01

  I always wanted that.

• 39:45H. Foley?

  I never understood how that saved anybody, what they did with that.

• 39:48Speaker 01

  What do you mean? Had handles on it and it floated.

• 39:51H. Foley?

  Yeah. I don't know, it just seemed weird. Seems like it's, it was like, you had like a, I don't know. What do you, what do they do with that?

• 40:00Speaker 01

  What do you mean?

• 40:01H. Foley?

  When you get out there with the person, what do you do with that?

• 40:03Speaker 01

  You give it to them, and it floats.

• 40:05H. Foley?

  And then you gotta, you gotta drag them in that in?

• 40:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, I think it's like, okay, hey, take a minute, hold on to this, stop pa- like, that'll let them stop panicking.

• 40:13H. Foley?

  Stop bitching up.

• 40:14Speaker 01

  I also think, when they're by themselves, they can use it, they can like ride a wave, it's like, you know, it acts as like a little, uh, kickboard or something.

• 40:21H. Foley?

  Really?

• 40:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, it also helps them, they're, they don't have to swim, they can hold on to it, yeah.

• 40:24H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 40:25Speaker 01

  To get in the chop.

• 40:26H. Foley?

  They always taught us that you, you, you grab them by the neck and drag them in, and swam sideways, like that.

• 40:33Speaker 01

  Uh-huh.

• 40:34Speaker 03

  I think you wanna get under their arms, not their neck.

• 40:36H. Foley?

  Whatever, like that, yeah.

• 40:37Speaker 01

  Put them in a sleeper, make them pass out so they're not panicking.

• 40:43Speaker 01

  Take them down, find a mermaid.

• 40:46H. Foley?

  Well, you gotta be careful because they could drag you under too, that was always the big thing.

• 40:49Speaker 01

  You're giving them mouth to mouth, you're at the hot dog stand, get off!

• 40:55H. Foley?

  Alright, take it easy, make sure you're alright.

• 40:58Speaker 01

  Hey, a guy like you, you ever choke?

• 41:02H. Foley?

  Quick, get his balls in my mouth.

• 41:06Speaker 01

  Somebody take my bathing suit off, Stan, you're cutting your bathing suit off? Oh dude, we had, I, we had to cut the baby out of a onesie the other day, it was covered in shit.

• 41:16H. Foley?

  Oh, man!

• 41:18Speaker 01

  And Nadine was like, I think we cut it off, I'm like, no way, and then I started, I'm like, we gotta cut this, we gotta cut him out of this thing. It was all up his bat, and then if you pull that off, it's over his head.

• 41:29H. Foley?

  Ah!

• 41:31Speaker 01

  He don't know, he's liv- he's living a kid, he don't know.

• 41:35H. Foley?

  Stinky?

• 41:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's pretty bad.

• 41:37H. Foley?

  Yeah?

• 41:38Speaker 01

  It ain't great, mhm.

• 41:40H. Foley?

  Did he cover anything?

• 41:42Speaker 01

  No.

• 41:42H. Foley?

  No, you're just, cause he's your, it's your son, it's your kid.

• 41:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 41:46H. Foley?

  Huh.

• 41:47Speaker 01

  So I'm told. I'm happy he looks like me, I don't have to do a paternity test, cause I was thinking that.

• 41:54H. Foley?

  Really?

• 41:55Speaker 01

  I was on the road when this happened.

• 42:02Speaker 01

  Whose white baby is that? She's like, "He looks like you. He's Dominican." I'm like, "What?" He's got a baseball. She's saying that before he even comes out. "Hey, he really looks like you." And his autogram. "He looks like you. He's got a huge chin." Really trying to sell it? Ah, alright, let's see here. This one's just fun. Uh, $10 homey never had one read. Is it garbage? If you listen to the entire podcast in reverse order, so Foley gets skinnier and says he's getting fatter, Gippy's hairs grow back in, and the boys get much less successful over time. Thanks, dog. Shout out to you. That's a good time. I mean, you look back at, I mean, definitely some of the ones we shot before the pandemic in Champion Studios, no, in, uh, at Gotham Podcast Studios. Yeah, okay.

• 42:47Speaker 01

  Those, there was like three or four there. I think it was Ian, Jared Freed, Cannon, and Fiore, maybe? And Donley, so maybe five there. Those, I mean, we're different people on a molecular level. What do you mean? Well, I mean, it's just, it's a long time ago. Many beers, heaters. We were in different places in our lives. We were, you know... I mean, I was doing DoorDash and at a full-time job. You were fucking waiting tables. Working in film. You're really pushing that narrative, aren't you? What are the fucking Oscars coming up or something? Is it you campaigning? Um, but yeah, no, so we've, I'm just saying, I was thin.

• 43:31Speaker 01

  I was like a thin guy. Yeah? Not anymore. Now you are. I'm getting back. I'm getting back. What do you weigh now? Wait, this isn't the thinnest you've ever been? No. Really? I think when I was really thin, I was walking around at probably 185. What are you, I thought you were like 165. What do you weigh now? 165? How much do you weigh now? What, am I a little light in the loafers? Uh, I'm probably 205 right now. That's great. Yeah, that's great. Muscling muscle. What do you weigh, string bean?

• 44:03Speaker 03

  COVID took me down a bunch. I'm like 150 right now. I think I got it back. I got, I lost a lot of weight during COVID.

• 44:09Speaker 01

  That's like from, that's like your right leg from the knee down, 150. 150, yeah. 150. You're like six feet tall. Did you, have you watched that documentary on The Biggest Loser? Huh? No.

• 44:24Speaker 01

  The life and times age falling.

• 44:28H. Foley?

  I got defensive just by the name. Not a loser!

• 44:33Speaker 01

  I work in Phil.

• 44:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, so expose on that, on uh, that was a huge franchise. I didn't realize it went for like 12 seasons.

• 44:43H. Foley?

  It's no good, what? Bad?

• 44:44Speaker 01

  Nah, yeah, bad.

• 44:45H. Foley?

  Why?

• 44:46Speaker 01

  Bad, bad, but they were giving him like fen-phen and shit.

• 44:48H. Foley?

  Fen-phen?

• 44:49Speaker 01

  One guy lost like 280 pounds in like 12 weeks.

• 44:54H. Foley?

  That's what I need.

• 44:57H. Foley?

  I'd be done, 12 weeks.

• 44:59Speaker 01

  They all put it back on.

• 45:00H. Foley?

  Put it back on?

• 45:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 45:02H. Foley?

  Man, that's a fun ride.

• 45:03Speaker 01

  The one guy lost all of his skin, like that lost, they got him the skin, they skin gra- you know, they toned him up.

• 45:09H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 45:10Speaker 01

  And then he put it back, he put more back on. They're talking about coming out, they're gonna have to get re-hemmed.

• 45:15H. Foley?

  Bad tomato. Damn dude, 220 pounds in 12 weeks?

• 45:20Speaker 01

  More than that, yeah. Maybe not 12 weeks, maybe 6 months.

• 45:22H. Foley?

  I thought they all got the stomach surgery.

• 45:24Speaker 01

  What do you mean? No, that was all natural.

• 45:27H. Foley?

  Oh, wait.

• 45:28Speaker 01

  I mean like, that was all...

• 45:29H. Foley?

  Were you talking about the old guy?

• 45:31Speaker 01

  What old guy?

• 45:32H. Foley?

  Is it the doctor? The old doctor with the accent and the glasses with the two fat broads and the sodas?

• 45:37Speaker 01

  No, that's...

• 45:38Speaker 03

  That's 600 pound sister.

• 45:39H. Foley?

  Okay, that doctor. I thought that doctor was legit.

• 45:43Speaker 01

  He is.

• 45:44H. Foley?

  Uh-huh.

• 45:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's trying to get them to the stomach staple.

• 45:47H. Foley?

  Right.

• 45:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, this was the biggest loser, it was a reality competition in the early 2000's.

• 45:51H. Foley?

  Oh, it was on like NBC?

• 45:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 45:53H. Foley?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, I remember it.

• 45:55Speaker 01

  And it was like, you know, it was uh, they had to keep upping the ante every season, they're like... And that's one of them things that like, numbers don't, they put them on the scale and it's like, oh, he's down 8 pounds. It was like, that's not gonna fucking, that's not gonna sell any tide, you know what I mean? We gotta move commercials.

• 46:14Speaker 01

  So unless they were in double digits, it was like, you're losing, imagine losing 12 pounds in a week and people being like, oh, that's pretty good. Fucking crazy dude.

• 46:24Speaker 01

  You'd get fatter. You put on 18.

• 46:27H. Foley?

  Fuck! I lost 75 pounds in 3 days.

• 46:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's crazy.

• 46:33Speaker 01

  All sucked out and shit.

• 46:37H. Foley?

  Ah, it's good stuff.

• 46:38Speaker 01

  Uh, alright, this one's from Astoria Bagels. Hell yeah, brother.

• 46:41H. Foley?

  Oh yeah.

• 46:42Speaker 01

  Is it garbage to put an ice cube in your mouth and take a swig of soda? I want the ice, but don't want to dilute my product. Huh.

• 46:51H. Foley?

  What?

• 46:51Speaker 01

  That seems insane.

• 46:53H. Foley?

  Yeah. Nobody's doing that. Where you have a cup of ice next to you and the soda next to you? It's supposed to get, it's, listen. I'm gonna get pissed off. I'm gonna fucking lose it. That's the way, it's a...

• 47:07Speaker 01

  You like it? Uh huh, uh huh. He likes it.

• 47:09H. Foley?

  It's not the way I like it. The product is sup-

• 47:12Speaker 01

  It answered me.

• 47:13H. Foley?

  The product is supposed to theoretically be put in ice. Okay, I know you have your cans-

• 47:19Speaker 01

  Not necessarily though, because if it's refrigerated, then it doesn't go in ice. If you pull out a screamer from a cooler, you don't put it on ice. So you're wrong theoretically, not theoretically, factually, you're wrong. That 2-liter should be in the refrigerator, you don't need ice.

• 47:33H. Foley?

  Alright. I give up. Give up?

• 47:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean...

• 47:39Speaker 01

  I get what you're saying.

• 47:40H. Foley?

  The 2-liter is a different soda than what's in the cans and the bottles.

• 47:44Speaker 01

  I don't disagree.

• 47:46H. Foley?

  Okay? The 2-liter is supposed to be poured over ice.

• 47:49Speaker 01

  That'll, that'll concede a little bit.

• 47:52H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 47:52Speaker 01

  But a can, a can's not. A can's supposed to be cold. The smaller receptacles of soda are cold, are supposed to be cold. But we kept 2 liters in the fridge. We'd still throw some ice in there. It hits different with and without the ice, for sure.

• 48:05H. Foley?

  Okay. Yes, it does.

• 48:08H. Foley?

  It does. You're not, okay.

• 48:13Speaker 01

  Everybody relax.

• 48:14H. Foley?

  Yeah, bitch chill the fuck out. I wouldn't look at it as it's diluting it. It's changing it.

• 48:23H. Foley?

  But it's not diluting it.

• 48:26Speaker 01

  It's enhancing it? It dilutes it if you don't drink it fast enough.

• 48:30H. Foley?

  Yeah, I guess. I don't know. Don't be, just put it in, just make a cup of ice. And pour the soda in there.

• 48:39H. Foley?

  Don't be done.

• 48:40Speaker 01

  You ruined Foley's day. Are you happy now? Astoria Bagels, you've ruined the Bug Man's day.

• 48:46H. Foley?

  It just drives me crazy when I hear people say like, "I don't like getting ice at like, the movies or McDonald's because you get more." Stop with that.

• 48:58Speaker 01

  But they, I agree with you, but that's, you value the experience with the ice. They value the amount, the total amount. You guys just value different things and that's okay. I'm not a-

• 49:10H. Foley?

  Different core values, but as Americans, we can disagree, but we still need to respect and love each other.

• 49:16Speaker 01

  But you agree on Coca-Cola. You agree on Coca-Cola is a great fine product.

• 49:19H. Foley?

  Of course.

• 49:20Speaker 01

  It's just how you consume your Coca-Cola. And that's why this country's great.

• 49:24H. Foley?

  And I tell you what-

• 49:25Speaker 01

  You're allowed to have that.

• 49:26H. Foley?

  You know what? I take all that back. I take all that back and I apologize to Astoria Bagels. You do your fucking thing, dog.

• 49:32Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 49:32H. Foley?

  I'll still be there for you.

• 49:33Speaker 01

  Holy shit, what just happened? This is-

• 49:36H. Foley?

  I was completely wrong to push my lifestyle on you. You do your thing. You want to have a cup of ice next to you and do an ice and take a sip? You do that.

• 49:46Speaker 01

  Respect.

• 49:47H. Foley?

  I was wrong.

• 49:48Speaker 01

  Let's give it a round of applause for the big man here.

• 49:52H. Foley?

  I was wrong.

• 49:53Speaker 01

  From the peanut gallery out back too. Uh, wow.

• 49:56H. Foley?

  The only thing for me to do is now take a long absence from the show.

• 50:05H. Foley?

  I get up and you never see me again.

• 50:07Speaker 01

  You guys grab a beer and you walk out.

• 50:11Speaker 01

  Later nerds.

• 50:14H. Foley?

  Once I get my couch board money.

• 50:17Speaker 01

  This was all behind me.

• 50:18H. Foley?

  Cuban!

• 50:18Speaker 01

  I don't need to do this. I'm a furniture tycoon. Um, alright, let's see here.

• 50:25H. Foley?

  Talk to me.

• 50:26Speaker 01

  This was from a live show as well, but this is a different person, I believe. Uh, this is from Chief and Heaters and Wife Beaters. $120 annual donation to Uncle Hank's Hoagie Habit.

• 50:39Speaker 01

  Uh, never had one red. Is it garbage to use cigarette butts as earplugs?

• 50:44H. Foley?

  Ooh.

• 50:45Speaker 01

  Growing up, my family had a habit of forgetting earplugs for us kids for loud events or activities. Monster truck rallies, drag race, and tractors, fireworks, gun range. Nothing like my parents fogging a couple down to provi... That's what he calls smoking, fogging a couple down, to provide us a pair of Marlboro 100 or Winston red filters to block out the decibels. Listen, they're essentially cotton balls. The filters are cotton balls. So, I would say, I think it's wild to smoke them and do it that way. If a good parent who also has a heater habit, I would rip the filter off, and then I'd smoke a non-filthy. That's just me as a new parent.

• 51:27Speaker 01

  I'm gonna try that when I get back on the heaters for a weekend, run that by the missus, see what she says. But, that's all that carcinogens are stuck in there, and then you're shoving that as close to the brain as you can get. That ain't good.

• 51:42H. Foley?

  They say that these days, that all that stuff's leaking.

• 51:45Speaker 01

  What?

• 51:45H. Foley?

  Like the tinfoil leaks into the food, and the plastics leaking into this, and this is leaking into that. So yeah, I mean, I don't want to act surprised like we haven't heard that before, and, you know what I mean?

• 51:57Speaker 01

  It makes, in dirtbag logic, you go, "I need something, it's there." The parents are trying to provide for you, they're trying to do good, they're entertaining you, and also keeping you safe the best they can, but...

• 52:08H. Foley?

  But nobody's ripping...

• 52:09Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 52:09H. Foley?

  Nobody's ripping a heater.

• 52:11Speaker 01

  To do that?

• 52:12H. Foley?

  No, what I'm saying is, the parents would be willing to do that for you, but they're not wasting it.

• 52:18Speaker 01

  That's what I'm saying. I would say the parent then smoke a filterless heater, you know?

• 52:25H. Foley?

  Still burning.

• 52:29Speaker 01

  Uh, alright, let's see here, um... This is wild. This is from TJ. "New $10, never had one red. Is it garbage if you run out of gas more than once in a day because you're trying to save money for heaters and beer later?" Man, so that dude's going and putting like three or four bucks on, and then three or four bucks more on. Which, I... Listen, I get, I've been there. I've struggled with the best of them. I've been a pump five, I've been five-on-pump-two guy. I get that.

• 53:04Speaker 01

  Give them 10, buy a $6 pack of heaters, put the rest on pump 3. I've been that guy.

• 53:08H. Foley?

  Have you ever proper run out of gas?

• 53:12Speaker 01

  Uh, with my brother once. He was taking me to the gym for an evaluation. Did I ever tell you that? Fuck me. Um, that was a sad day. Had to show up late to my evaluation at the gym. Cause my brother ran out of gas in his Chevy Lumina, cranking Camel, Camels with a K.

• 53:34H. Foley?

  Ooh.

• 53:34Speaker 01

  I used to, I don't know where he was getting them, but I loved them.

• 53:37H. Foley?

  I think I've only actually run out of gas once and it was in my, it was at my house. Like I was out of gas, it wouldn't start.

• 53:44Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 53:44H. Foley?

  But I remember I had to get a ride up to the gas station with the red thing to go back and, and fill it up.

• 53:50Speaker 01

  I do, I, I, I'm a, I'm a, as a guy who never really had cash, and we've talked about this of like putting it in the gas tank. Like I was never a full tank kinda guy, cause it's like, I don't want to invest 40, 50, whatever full tank of gas is gonna cost you. When you don't have the funds, you know? If I was really eating, I'd put 20 in and go, that'll be, you know.

• 54:09H. Foley?

  There's always a monetary value.

• 54:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.

• 54:11H. Foley?

  Until very recently.

• 54:12Speaker 01

  Um, but, uh, my wife, and now we have like the digital, like, hey, you have 38 miles till, you know, and that pops on around 35, 40 miles, whatever it is.

• 54:21H. Foley?

  Yeah, it's hard to run out of gas now.

• 54:23Speaker 01

  She's like, she's like, that comes on and she's like, we need to go. And I'm like,

• 54:30H. Foley?

  Forty miles.

• 54:31Speaker 01

  We got time. And she's like, it's not 40 miles. It goes down quicker. I go, okay, well, it's 20 miles, even if you cut it in half. It's still, we still got, you cut it by a quarter, I got 10 miles.

• 54:43H. Foley?

  You do fly pretty close to the summit there, cause I remember one time you and I were in the car and I think we, it was, we were in my car and we were leaving New York and I had a quarter of a tank.

• 54:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, a quarter of a tank will get you halfway to Birmingham. What are you talking? That'll.

• 54:56H. Foley?

  Quarter tank. You get stuck in traffic or something.

• 54:59Speaker 01

  Turn the air off, open the windows, shut it down. I'm a big coasting and neutral guy. I'll, I'll find the hills. I'll, whoo hoo, I'm, That, that is in me.

• 55:10H. Foley?

  Quarter tank, 99 miles to Philly. This guy says, let her ride.

• 55:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, rip it and rip it, baby. Quarter tank. Most of that's highway miles. It's 50, 80 miles, like a gallon on a highway.

• 55:25Speaker 01

  You be cooking, dog. Uh, yeah, I don't know. That's just-

• 55:29H. Foley?

  You talking no back road route?

• 55:31Speaker 01

  That's in me. That's why I pay bills late. I wait till they shut off the cable. Like, I'm very like, I'm very, if you give me a time or a date, it's in my genetic makeup to go, I gotta, that's for, that's for the general public. That ain't for guys like me. You know what I mean? I, I know how to push it to the limit.

• 55:52H. Foley?

  That's for savers.

• 55:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, get out of here.

• 55:54H. Foley?

  Talking about gunfighters. Guys, guys on the edge.

• 55:58Speaker 01

  Guys who will get, you know, who will regulate if they need to. Yeah, I'm about to work. I'm like, let's, you know.

• 56:05H. Foley?

  You want the smoke, huh? Let's see how far we can push it.

• 56:08Speaker 01

  Yeah. Well, I've just-

• 56:11H. Foley?

  Run around on the edge of the knife.

• 56:12Speaker 01

  My dad was the same way, man. I remember coasting into, coasting into, uh,

• 56:18H. Foley?

  A Chevron?

• 56:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, gas stations with him, throwing in a neutral and going, and me being nervous and him having a heater going, we'll be alright. And I go, like cowboy shit, we'll be good. I remember my stepdad one time said, we're probably gonna run out of gas, but I got some in the back. And then we ran out of gas.

• 56:34Speaker 01

  And we didn't even go get gas, which was crazy.

• 56:38Speaker 01

  He just-

• 56:39H. Foley?

  Having some in the back is scary. I would never let-

• 56:42Speaker 01

  It wasn't even, it wasn't even a, it was a, it was a big old suburban. So it was like an open back. There was just, now that I'm thinking about it, there was just gas in the car with us.

• 56:51H. Foley?

  Wow, I don't ever like that.

• 56:52Speaker 01

  That wasn't in a pickup truck. That wasn't in a trunk. We pulled into it and he just got out, like it was a gas station, got it, filled it up, and we went to where we were going.

• 57:00H. Foley?

  Cause remember when people had the, the, the big, the big like army looking-

• 57:05Speaker 01

  Canteen?

• 57:07H. Foley?

  These huge ones. They'd put them on the back of Jeeps.

• 57:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, that you can't have that anymore. That'll blow you up.

• 57:13H. Foley?

  No, yeah, people were getting rear-ended and it was blowing up.

• 57:17Speaker 01

  You know what I realized too, which I might, you might have said, and I kinda pushed back a little bit, but it's now a theory, I'm, I don't know if this was you. The Wranglers are for broads.

• 57:28H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 57:29Speaker 01

  I never really did, because the only people, I only knew a couple of people that had them and they were dudes, so I'm like, that doesn't make sense.

• 57:35H. Foley?

  Douches.

• 57:36Speaker 01

  Is that, that's a newer thing, maybe? I don't, or is that the same?

• 57:39H. Foley?

  Definitely newer thing.

• 57:40Speaker 01

  It's newer.

• 57:41H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 57:42Speaker 01

  And they all got the ducks on them.

• 57:44H. Foley?

  Ducks?

• 57:44Speaker 01

  You know about that?

• 57:46H. Foley?

  Like a duck?

• 57:46Speaker 01

  They all have ducks on their dashboard, like fifth of Google. It's like a thing.

• 57:50Speaker 03

  Like the little rubber ducks?

• 57:51Speaker 01

  Little rubber, I think they're ducks.

• 57:52Speaker 03

  I've seen that.

• 57:54Speaker 01

  And it's all chicks.

• 57:55H. Foley?

  Yeah. I mean, I only knew a couple of dudes that rolled around in those in high school, and if you did, I'm, you know, I'm not, I'm judging, but, you know, whatever.

• 58:03Speaker 01

  It never crossed my radar that it was for the ladies.

• 58:06H. Foley?

  It was always kinda douchey. Dudes with like, you know, the curly bleached hair and shit like that.

• 58:11Speaker 01

  Surfer shit. I'll give you that. That fits that though, because the top comes off, you're an outdoorsy guy. That kinda, that kinda makes sense to me a little bit.

• 58:18H. Foley?

  What kills me with them, and I've always said this, is the wave.

• 58:21Speaker 01

  They had a Jeep thing.

• 58:22H. Foley?

  They're waving at each other in the Jeeps.

• 58:24Speaker 01

  Well, it's like a low, it's like a, you throw to deuce.

• 58:29Speaker 03

  The rubber ducks are part of a growing trend called ducking, where owners of a Jeep will leave a rubber duck on another Jeep as a random act of kindness.

• 58:39Speaker 01

  Slash your tires.

• 58:42H. Foley?

  That's like when the Beatles came back out, and they all had a sunflower in the...

• 58:46Speaker 01

  Uh, they had like a little, that came with a vase, though.

• 58:49H. Foley?

  Those things stink. I always thought that was a whack car, except for Herbie. Remember Herbie? You know a Herbie?

• 58:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, I got the reboot.

• 58:58H. Foley?

  Yeah. The original one was so sad.

• 59:03Speaker 01

  I missed it, I don't know.

• 59:03H. Foley?

  You got like run over or something like that.

• 59:05Speaker 03

  Oh, even the reboot was sad, yeah.

• 59:06H. Foley?

  Sad as shit.

• 59:07Speaker 03

  They had to put them down or something.

• 59:08H. Foley?

  Yeah, fucking...

• 59:09Speaker 01

  They had to put a car down.

• 59:11H. Foley?

  Just like that, and they're like fucking putting them in the crusher, because they owe the mob money.

• 59:18Speaker 01

  We're gonna take you apart one bolt at a time.

• 59:21H. Foley?

  Yeah. All those Disney live action movies were sad as shit. Old Yeller was brutal. Fucking Blues brains out behind the cabin.

• 59:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, that stuff, by the time that got to me, that was all just like you had heard the story of old Yeller to the point like, I don't need to read this, I know this dog gets it.

• 59:37H. Foley?

  Yeah. You know what I mean? That shit was just old enough where we would re-watch that stuff, and to me, it was old. They'd be from like the 60s and 70s, and they had that old, like, tinge to them. Oh, man, brutal, like a Saturday afternoon, you're watching that shit, it's like, ugh. Nasty.

• 59:56Speaker 01

  That's how I feel.

• 59:56H. Foley?

  But Beetle, I never got Bugs, VW Bugs, people don't like VW Bugs.

• 1:00:02Speaker 01

  Again, the only person I ever knew that had one, had a reissue, was this kid's sister.

• 1:00:06H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:07Speaker 01

  And she had it, that was, I mean, I've never known anybody to drive a Volkswagen Bug.

• 1:00:12H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:00:13Speaker 01

  That was like a silly car, and it was like, who the hell has time to, or money to spend on a silly car? You know what I mean? It's like, I gotta get to work, motherfucker, I gotta go, thank you, gays, I gotta get, I gotta get to Tennessee.

• 1:00:23H. Foley?

  They always had that weird brrrr sound, too.

• 1:00:26Speaker 01

  Wow, I don't know, I mean, you've met a lot of my family members, I don't know who you would see driving a fucking Bug. Uncle Ben driving a Bug to the job site?

• 1:00:34H. Foley?

  I could see maybe Denise in her teenage years, you know? Protesting the war, whatever.

• 1:00:40Speaker 01

  She was trashing someone for doing edibles the other day. Trashing someone, she is anti-weed, that broad. And my uncle, who, you know, dabble, you know, he's, you got, you know, he's got a fun past to say to me.

• 1:00:53H. Foley?

  He's over there taking edibles.

• 1:00:55Speaker 01

  That's what you get for taking the THC. He's yelling at my aunt or something, like, he's yelling at somebody, I go, easy does it, fucking, you got a wine named after you.

• 1:01:05H. Foley?

  Two bottles of Cabot in you.

• 1:01:07Speaker 01

  Little bit of Pinot Grigio, I don't know, a bottle of Josh.

• 1:01:12H. Foley?

  She like a bottle, she like, she like Josh, that's probably, that's probably, uh...

• 1:01:18H. Foley?

  The top dollar stuff.

• 1:01:19Speaker 01

  That's, yeah, that's, I don't know anything about wine. I just know, I bought a bottle of it because I had heard it. And I brought it. She goes, ew. It was like 18, I don't know what it was, a bottle. I don't know anything about, I didn't know that was an expensive bottle of wine. And I go, ew, who, oh, someone's doing well. You know what I mean? I'm like, hey. Actually, we're taking. I've invited you here, Sharks. Have you heard about my couch board?

• 1:01:43H. Foley?

  I just know.

• 1:01:44Speaker 01

  You come out.

• 1:01:45H. Foley?

  It's all glued together.

• 1:01:47Speaker 01

  All right, we gotta wrap it up.

• 1:01:49H. Foley?

  Gang, grab some tickets to the live show. Come out and see the boys. End of this month, we're out in La La Land. We're in San Fran. We're in Seattle. We're in Portland. Come see us. And the rest of the tour, October, November, December. Big, big show in Philly on December 13. We want everybody there. We want to sell that out. The Metropolitan Theater. We love you and we'll see you next week. Peace.