Pickin' Up Broads w/ Kippy & Foley!

Are You Garbage is back with Kippy and Foley for a family episode talking pickin' up chicks, nostalgia diners, and your parents setting you up, it's a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! AYG & Friends: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Aura Frames: Save on the perfect gift by visiting https://AuraFrames.com to get $35-off Aura’s best-selling Carver Mat frames by using promo code GARBAGE at checkout. Acorns: Head to https://acorns.com/GARBAGE or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future today! Soul: https://getsoul.com with promo code GARBAGE Adam & Eve: https://adamandeve.qrd.by/x8w0dv with promo code GARBAGE Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.

• 0:19H. Foley?

  Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage?

• 0:25Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 0:26H. Foley?

  It's that little show we sit there with your favorite comedians and we find out if they're good to be classy.

• 0:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 0:30H. Foley?

  Or if they're just a big old piece of trash.

• 0:32Speaker 02

  Trash, trash, trash.

• 0:33H. Foley?

  I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Toody's in the new addition. She's down in the basement doing a little remodeling.

• 0:40Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 0:41H. Foley?

  Panic room.

• 0:41Speaker 02

  Okay. Good for her.

• 0:44H. Foley?

  That's from Ecuadorian Gray over there on the Patreon.

• 0:47Speaker 02

  Is that your plug?

• 0:48H. Foley?

  Coming up with some zingers over there. I like it. It's fun. My co-host is coming at you from across the table. Speaking of fun, he is the CEO of Are You Garbage. He is an international businessman and my best pal in the whole wide world, because it's coming up on Christmas bonus time. Give it up for KJ, Kevin J. Ryan, everybody.

• 1:05Speaker 02

  I don't like you painting this thing that like I give you a paycheck or something. You're really spinning the narrative to the fucking homies and the bozos out there. As you do, we've entered Foleyville. What's up, everybody? Thanks for tuning in. As always, please make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube. And obviously, the greatest website of all time.

• 1:23H. Foley?

  Sweet Lord.

• 1:24Speaker 02

  You go over there, you go www.patreon.com/areyougarbage. You get all that bonus content, gang.

• 1:30H. Foley?

  Yes, sir.

• 1:31Speaker 02

  And a new thing we're doing is you get to, uh, the, the homies are, are submitting their own toody jokes, which they're, they're, they're two for two already.

• 1:38H. Foley?

  Got a writing staff.

• 1:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. Subbing out your job real quick. I like it.

• 1:43H. Foley?

  Cultivating, uh, artists over there.

• 1:45Speaker 02

  Is that what you're doing?

• 1:46H. Foley?

  Yeah. They want to get in the business, I'll give them a recommendation.

• 1:49Speaker 02

  Someone call it a writing slump by the big man.

• 1:52H. Foley?

  I'm trying to get Kimmel on the phone.

• 1:55H. Foley?

  Um, happy holidays, everybody. We're in the goddamn thick of it now.

• 1:59Speaker 02

  It's about to be the precipice, baby. The boys are locked and loaded.

• 2:03H. Foley?

  Feel it out there.

• 2:04Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 2:05H. Foley?

  I'm a hanker for a hot chocolate and a fucking candy cane.

• 2:08Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 2:09H. Foley?

  Let's go.

• 2:09Speaker 02

  I think you get those in August, too.

• 2:10H. Foley?

  You know what's nice? You guys ever had Mexican hot chocolate?

• 2:14Speaker 02

  No.

• 2:15H. Foley?

  Delicious. Little cinnamon in it.

• 2:17Speaker 02

  That's, I mean, that's not Mexican hot choc-

• 2:19H. Foley?

  Yes, it is.

• 2:20Speaker 02

  I, I'm sure other people are putting cinnamon in their hot chocolate. It's not just the Mexico.

• 2:24H. Foley?

  It's a big thing down there.

• 2:25Speaker 02

  Okay. Did you see this on Instagram? Yeah, you say, this is something that you've seen two seconds ago.

• 2:32H. Foley?

  I used to get it from a, a place in Sunnyside where I lived. I used to go and get, um-

• 2:36Speaker 02

  No, let me make this up for the next three minutes.

• 2:39H. Foley?

  Because I remember the first time I had it, I was like, there's dirt in here.

• 2:42Speaker 02

  Someone spit in my coffee. Alright, well, I'm gonna have to try to, I'm gonna have to get my hands on some Mexican hot chocolate.

• 2:49H. Foley?

  Try it out.

• 2:50Speaker 02

  Or just cinnamon and regular hot chocolate.

• 2:52H. Foley?

  It's delicious.

• 2:53Speaker 02

  I can do it myself.

• 2:54H. Foley?

  Take my watch off, I'm scratching the table.

• 2:56Speaker 02

  I know, you're, you're like a bull in a china, you're like a fat guy in a podcast studio, breaking stuff. I got something-

• 3:03H. Foley?

  That's a little too on the nose.

• 3:07Speaker 02

  I'm known for my analogies.

• 3:08H. Foley?

  Do you remember, that's from a commercial.

• 3:10Speaker 02

  What?

• 3:11H. Foley?

  The bull, was that, I, I know that from a, from a commercial back in the day.

• 3:15Speaker 02

  I mean, I think it's an old saying.

• 3:17H. Foley?

  But they actually let a bull loose in a china shop. I can't remember what the commercial was for. Like, life insurance or something like that.

• 3:23Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 3:23H. Foley?

  Yeah. I was thinking, what's the bull doing in there?

• 3:26Speaker 02

  Maybe he's an antiquer guy, I don't know.

• 3:28H. Foley?

  A little window shopping.

• 3:30Speaker 02

  Cut the day off. Go kick some tires. Uh, I was reminded, uh, I'm doing that, I'm an older guy, you know what I mean? I'm, I'm becoming an older gentleman, I'm aging.

• 3:40H. Foley?

  You're 40, you're not 40 yet, right?

• 3:41Speaker 02

  Nah, I'm 38.

• 3:42H. Foley?

  38.

• 3:43Speaker 02

  And, uh, but I was over there-

• 3:45H. Foley?

  You look 40.

• 3:47Speaker 02

  Look, look older than that.

• 3:49H. Foley?

  Them wriggled balls.

• 3:51Speaker 02

  That tight sack.

• 3:52H. Foley?

  Do you?

• 3:52Speaker 02

  It's alright. Um-

• 3:54H. Foley?

  Little plum.

• 3:57H. Foley?

  Georgia peach. Macinot type. Little fuzz on them.

• 4:01Speaker 02

  Macinot. My balls are only good for two weeks a year.

• 4:07Speaker 02

  You gotta act when they're hot, baby.

• 4:09H. Foley?

  Gotta get them ripe, baby.

• 4:11Speaker 02

  Couple of plum. That's a great line.

• 4:13H. Foley?

  Otherwise you gotta jar them.

• 4:15Speaker 02

  That's, I forget what that's from. That was a 90's thing, though.

• 4:18H. Foley?

  What?

• 4:18Speaker 02

  Calling your balls plums. Ooh, right in the plums.

• 4:21H. Foley?

  In, uh, Eastbound and Down, Will Ferrell delivers that.

• 4:24Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. I can feel it in my plums.

• 4:26H. Foley?

  Yeah, when he's fighting with them.

• 4:28Speaker 02

  Um, I was reminded on Facebook, I saw a picture, uh, of this place that I was relatively obsessed with as a kid. It was a restaurant. And I never knew where it was, because I was a young, we'd just drive by it all the time. And it was a proper airplane. An airplane sat on, a full-size airplane sat on top of the restaurant.

• 4:56H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 4:57Speaker 02

  And above it, the red, the, so it was the restaurant, then a proper huge, like, airplane.

• 5:03H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 5:03Speaker 02

  And he turned that into a cocktail lounge.

• 5:05H. Foley?

  Really?

• 5:06Speaker 02

  It was here, so I have a picture of it.

• 5:07H. Foley?

  In the 90's?

• 5:08Speaker 02

  And this was in the 70's he did it, into the 90's, which is a very, like, uh...

• 5:12H. Foley?

  Wait, is this in your area?

• 5:13Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 5:14H. Foley?

  Out in Bucks County?

• 5:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was in Pendel.

• 5:17H. Foley?

  What the fuck?

• 5:18Speaker 02

  Look at that thing.

• 5:19H. Foley?

  What the shit?

• 5:20Speaker 02

  Dude, that was a restaurant I would drive by as a kid.

• 5:24H. Foley?

  How many of those things crashed? That's like an old TWA plane.

• 5:27Speaker 02

  No, so, it's, it's, uh, the guy was a pilot.

• 5:31H. Foley?

  Uh-huh.

• 5:32Speaker 02

  Jim Flannery's.

• 5:33H. Foley?

  Ooh, that's nice.

• 5:34Speaker 02

  They probably threw, it was an authentic Lockheed Super G Constellation airliner.

• 5:38H. Foley?

  Constellation?

• 5:39Speaker 02

  Known as the Geneva Trader. It's now a 72C cocktail lounge, dude. Imagine pulling some trim out of there.

• 5:45H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 5:46Speaker 02

  A couple of swingers.

• 5:48H. Foley?

  Lot of Bush.

• 5:49Speaker 02

  Uh, the pilots, a lot of, that was prime Bush era, dude. I ain't talking GW.

• 5:58Speaker 02

  Uh huh. Glimpse inside the cabin in 1967, it was converted to a cocktail lounge. Small combos near the cockpit.

• 6:06H. Foley?

  Who the fuck was out there in 1967?

• 6:09Speaker 02

  It was in Pendel, Bucks County. Uh, Flannery's is renowned for its fine food and beverage service in Bucks County since 1928. They were back there banging. You'll be flying high at Jim Flannery's Constellation Airliner Room. Ready or not, here it comes. A cocktail lounge is an authentic airplane or is an authentic airplane that's really a cocktail lounge. Man, the marketing back then. Either way, you're up and away at Jim Flannery's Constellation Room. Cocktails, entertainment, nightly. The best prime beef and seafood that'll really be flying high.

• 6:39H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 6:40Speaker 02

  Look at that, though.

• 6:41H. Foley?

  Prime beef? That's not even a thing.

• 6:43Speaker 02

  I know, and they spelled seafood two different words.

• 6:47H. Foley?

  That's awesome.

• 6:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, look at that fucking... Dude, I used to drive by it as a kid and I'd be like, this is the craziest fucking thing ever.

• 6:52H. Foley?

  You never went in there? Your old man never took you in there? He wasn't trying to close you?

• 6:55Speaker 02

  Yeah. I mean, that dude, that... You're up there having...

• 6:58H. Foley?

  You put on something decent, maybe he'd take you over there.

• 7:00Speaker 02

  Couple of fucking boil... a beef eater up there or something like that?

• 7:03H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah.

• 7:04Speaker 02

  That was... That was prime closing. Imagine the...

• 7:07H. Foley?

  Eating cocktail onions.

• 7:08Speaker 02

  Imagine the fucking gigolos and stuff that were in that place.

• 7:12H. Foley?

  So, how'd you get up there?

• 7:13Speaker 02

  See, there's a spiral staircase that leads up to... It was a full... It's... And then...

• 7:17H. Foley?

  That's dangerous.

• 7:18Speaker 02

  So, the guy was a World War II pilot, I found out.

• 7:20H. Foley?

  Okay, Jim Flannery.

• 7:22Speaker 02

  I went on a deep dive on Flannery.

• 7:23H. Foley?

  Alright.

• 7:24Speaker 02

  Um, in the...

• 7:26H. Foley?

  Weather recon pilot.

• 7:27Speaker 02

  Is that... Yeah, World War II weather recon pilot was capitalized on novelty restaurant... Well, this is what it was, the novelty restaurant craze of the 1960s. Dude, who now would buy a plane and throw it on top of a restaurant for marketing purposes? I love it.

• 7:41H. Foley?

  I feel like there is something out there now, and I want to say it's in New York, that there's some... Somebody just posted a picture of it, where you can sit in the plane and it looks like you're flying around.

• 7:52Speaker 02

  It's a TWA hotel.

• 7:54H. Foley?

  Is that where it is?

• 7:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:55H. Foley?

  You sure?

• 7:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, in New York, yeah.

• 7:57H. Foley?

  Cause I stayed in that TWA hotel.

• 8:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's... Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's at the... They have like the interior of a...

• 8:04H. Foley?

  Yeah, they have the interior, but not the plane.

• 8:06Speaker 02

  Wait, what are you saying? It flies around?

• 8:07H. Foley?

  No, it looks like... Cause it has like screens outside the window. You look like you're in the air. Some people we know were just in it. It looks real nice. No?

• 8:18Speaker 02

  I don't know. I've never.

• 8:19H. Foley?

  I feel like that shit's coming back.

• 8:21Speaker 02

  I'm more of a Flanneries man myself.

• 8:24H. Foley?

  That's crazy.

• 8:25Speaker 02

  Look at, I mean dude, they, the, the, the town came out to watch it get put in.

• 8:29H. Foley?

  That's gotta be-

• 8:30Speaker 02

  That's Pendel. Pendel ain't a great area.

• 8:32H. Foley?

  Man, look at that dirtbag in the fucking jean shorts.

• 8:35Speaker 02

  Jean shorts.

• 8:35H. Foley?

  No shirt.

• 8:36Speaker 02

  Two guys with no shirts on and jean shorts. The airplane diner they, that's what I remember it as. It was, it turned to the airplane diner.

• 8:43H. Foley?

  Okay, that makes sense.

• 8:44Speaker 02

  And I remember going, can we fucking go in there?

• 8:46H. Foley?

  It never took ya, huh?

• 8:47Speaker 02

  Never fucking took me.

• 8:48H. Foley?

  Right, a weight limit. That little bastard bringing the whole thing down.

• 8:53Speaker 02

  We're not gonna get up? He's trying to, he's pulling on the yoke.

• 8:57H. Foley?

  He's having flashbacks.

• 8:58Speaker 02

  I'm asking for more dinner rolls. Man, yeah.

• 9:02H. Foley?

  Somebody sent-

• 9:03Speaker 02

  Insane.

• 9:04H. Foley?

  One of the homies sent me a link to a YouTube video of all old shit, all old franchises that are closed down now. A lot of them had that, the gimmicks.

• 9:13Speaker 02

  It was the guy-

• 9:14H. Foley?

  Yankee doodle, Dan.

• 9:15Speaker 02

  You had to get the newspaper to write about ya, how we go, it's like very Jackie Moon from, uh-

• 9:20H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 9:20Speaker 02

  Tropic Thunder.

• 9:21H. Foley?

  Yeah, you had to fucking create a buzz.

• 9:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's like, what a fucking marketing genius.

• 9:26H. Foley?

  Put an airplane out there.

• 9:27Speaker 02

  I had a lot of coke involved in this too, I think.

• 9:29H. Foley?

  That's crazy.

• 9:30Speaker 02

  Figuring that out. Yeah, I was like, damn dude, and now I'm-

• 9:32H. Foley?

  It's not still there.

• 9:33Speaker 02

  It's not still there. They, they took it and they sold it or gave it to the Museum of Aviation. It's in-

• 9:39H. Foley?

  Sold it to the Iranians or something like that. Good luck. It smells like old beef in there.

• 9:46Speaker 02

  Still a couple of line cooks in the back. What the hell? Um, no, so apparently the inside of it was, the cockpit was never changed.

• 9:56H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 9:56Speaker 02

  So it was still original and that was, the museum was like, there are, there's, this is the only lasting one of these.

• 10:01H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 10:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, so they-

• 10:02H. Foley?

  A constellation. They were big back in the day.

• 10:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:05H. Foley?

  If you watched Aviator.

• 10:07Speaker 02

  Oh, is that the one?

• 10:08H. Foley?

  It was the constellation, Lockheed Constellation. I feel like that might have been, uh, Howard Hughes that made that. Or he had the other one.

• 10:17Speaker 02

  Can you get in on that? Who made the constellation? It looks like the one from back, from that movie, but I don't fucking know.

• 10:23H. Foley?

  Yeah. There was two big planes. Or maybe I'm thinking of the C-17.

• 10:28Speaker 02

  Lockheed.

• 10:29H. Foley?

  Lockheed, right, but who designed it? Does it say who designed it? I thought, uh, what's his name? Fred Turner. Howard Hughes.

• 10:39Speaker 02

  Fred, who's Fred Turner? Leonardo DiCaprio.

• 10:42H. Foley?

  Fred Turner's, um, Ray Kroc's second man in charge.

• 10:47Speaker 02

  You've been watching The Fountain, yeah. I mean, you're fucking something else, dude. Hughes outlined the initial, uh, performance specs.

• 10:56H. Foley?

  There you go. Which is crazy what that guy did. Crazy.

• 11:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, that movie gives me so much anxiety.

• 11:02H. Foley?

  Ooh, he's watching his freak show.

• 11:04Speaker 02

  Oh, man.

• 11:04H. Foley?

  Closing all kinds of ass out there in L.A., though. Lot of broads.

• 11:08Speaker 02

  Tight industry.

• 11:09H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 11:09Speaker 02

  You know what I mean?

• 11:10H. Foley?

  Fucking movie producer, making westerns.

• 11:13Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 11:13H. Foley?

  Alan Turner and the likes, Mae West. Couple other broads.

• 11:19Speaker 02

  Not to be mentioned, Et24.

• 11:23H. Foley?

  Alright, that's neither here nor there. We quit screwing around. I kinda wanna go to that restaurant.

• 11:28Speaker 02

  I know, I'm so upset, dude. I saw the picture and I was like... This is one of those things where I'm like, oh, that was a figment of my imagination. I never knew where it was, cuz I was like too young, it was, it was a few towns over, and I'm like...

• 11:38H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 11:39Speaker 02

  You would see it once every...

• 11:40H. Foley?

  And you didn't know where the hell you were back then?

• 11:42Speaker 02

  No.

• 11:42H. Foley?

  Everything was landmarks back then.

• 11:44Speaker 02

  Imagine...

• 11:44H. Foley?

  I didn't know what street I was on, but I knew where the little, the little waterfall was, that meant we were close to my cousin's house.

• 11:52Speaker 02

  Like a Native American track, or you are? You'd reach down, you're eating the dirt. Ah, yes, the Mexican chocolate, or hot chocolate.

• 12:00H. Foley?

  I see smoke in the distance.

• 12:01Speaker 02

  Um, yeah, and it was, I remember I would be getting, I'd be like, oh, I remember this, the airplane's coming up, and man, I would just fuck, I remember sitting at a light, just staring at that thing, asking my dad, "Let's get up in there."

• 12:14H. Foley?

  Blowing a heater in your face?

• 12:15Speaker 02

  Which I don't get, cuz he loved diners, and I'm like, "Let's grab an omelet and a short stack."

• 12:19H. Foley?

  Never took you over there.

• 12:20Speaker 02

  Not that one.

• 12:21H. Foley?

  Figure that'd be a no-brainer. Take a kid, take the kids in the airplane. Shut you up for a little bit, let you run around.

• 12:27Speaker 02

  Yeah. We would go to, I mean, we were the suburban diner out there on Street Road in Busselton.

• 12:32H. Foley?

  Straight up the middle, huh? Couple of, only did eggs over medium. Bacon's all crispy.

• 12:38Speaker 02

  I'd do a short stack with a chalky milk that I would spill and get yelled at.

• 12:43H. Foley?

  Cup of senka, huh? Somebody straightened me up.

• 12:46Speaker 02

  With that, it was a great diner, cuz they had the...

• 12:49H. Foley?

  Jukebox.

• 12:50Speaker 02

  Jukebox, man, and I-

• 12:51H. Foley?

  That's a goddamn airplane!

• 12:52Speaker 02

  I know, that's what I'm saying, get me in that!

• 12:54H. Foley?

  Being there going down the slide and shit, doing bumps in the bathroom.

• 12:58Speaker 02

  Finding bags and stuff. From people partying the night before.

• 13:03H. Foley?

  You got a shoot on?

• 13:05H. Foley?

  Ah, that's our- we had the Big Cow in Wilkes-Barre.

• 13:07Speaker 02

  Don't talk about your mom like that.

• 13:09H. Foley?

  Which I think is still there. It was an ice cream place. I wanna say it was on 309, but I could be wrong. Um, yeah, Big Cow next to an ice cream spot. Which I think it's still- I think it's there.

• 13:20Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 13:20H. Foley?

  Ice cream shop's long gone.

• 13:22Speaker 02

  Oh, it's just a big cow.

• 13:24H. Foley?

  It's like the elephant in Margate.

• 13:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, I never knew that.

• 13:27H. Foley?

  Lucy, you never saw Lucy?

• 13:29Speaker 02

  That was-

• 13:29H. Foley?

  It's like a big purple elephant or something like that.

• 13:31Speaker 02

  Margate might as well been fucking-

• 13:33H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 13:34Speaker 02

  Kenny Bunkport.

• 13:35H. Foley?

  I love all that shit.

• 13:36Speaker 02

  We had- we weren't allowed to look- We weren't allowed to look at it as we drove by. No way. Margate? I went to Ventnor once with my uncle.

• 13:45H. Foley?

  For the folks that don't know, it's the richer part of the Jersey Shore, Margate.

• 13:49Speaker 02

  Which I still see houses there, cuz like I'll have friends that go there or whatever, or like visit other people, they go to like a- and I'm like- This is like the Hampton, like I'm intimidated to go to the Hamptons just from what I hear about it.

• 13:59H. Foley?

  Sure, Margate's nice.

• 14:00Speaker 02

  Even though there's trashy parts of it.

• 14:01H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 14:02Speaker 02

  But, yeah, that ain't- I'm fucking-

• 14:04H. Foley?

  Yeah, Wildwood, man.

• 14:05Speaker 02

  I'm all-

• 14:06H. Foley?

  Old airplane kinda got us.

• 14:08Speaker 02

  Fucking stale chicken fingers and-

• 14:10H. Foley?

  That just tells you about us, man. Something like that gets us.

• 14:13Speaker 02

  I've been thinking about it for fucking three days, dude. Just to be like, there was a goddamn airplane, I never got to go to it.

• 14:17H. Foley?

  Food can suck, who gives a shit?

• 14:18Speaker 02

  I'm on a goddamn fucking bird right now.

• 14:20H. Foley?

  Goddamn C-130, fucking, coming in hot. Why don't they let you go up and fuck with the cockpit as a kid?

• 14:27Speaker 02

  I don't think fuck with it. Can't be up there with a hammer, just fucking-

• 14:30H. Foley?

  True. It didn't start or nothing, right?

• 14:32Speaker 02

  Uh-

• 14:33H. Foley?

  That'd be dangerous.

• 14:35Speaker 02

  What?

• 14:35H. Foley?

  Could be in there flipping switches.

• 14:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't think it's st- I mean, were you gonna fly? What, what? Take off down Route 1?

• 14:42Speaker 02

  Watch out. I got my permit.

• 14:44H. Foley?

  That's the weather. Alright, let's get to it, gang. It's a family episode, as you know. Submit your questions on Patreon. You can have it read by Captain Kevin Ryan, everybody.

• 14:53Speaker 02

  Officer Doofy. Alright, let's see here. This one's from Peaches. Longtime listener and question asker.

• 14:59H. Foley?

  Peaches is alright.

• 15:02Speaker 02

  Peaches can get you good weed, I think, too. That's my boy. I had a boy Peaches in college. Had good weed, now that I think about it.

• 15:09H. Foley?

  Where'd he get that name from?

• 15:11Speaker 02

  I don't know. It was one of those things where he's a little edgy. It was like a tough kid with a sweet name.

• 15:16H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 15:16Speaker 02

  I was like, you know. They call him a fat guy Tiny or whatever, you know?

• 15:21H. Foley?

  Fat guy named Tiny's alright.

• 15:23Speaker 02

  Uh, but yeah, shout out to Peaches. Pete. I forget his last name.

• 15:26H. Foley?

  Oh, that's good. There you go. Pete. Pete Peaches.

• 15:28Speaker 02

  I think you used to say, "Oh, what do you salt as a peach?" And he did not like that.

• 15:35Speaker 02

  White kid from a real bad neighborhood.

• 15:38H. Foley?

  They're the worst.

• 15:38Speaker 02

  What a good plug, dude. Yeah, good weed.

• 15:41H. Foley?

  They're the worst. White kid from a bad neighborhood, look out.

• 15:44Speaker 02

  He would listen to rap I didn't even know. I'm like, dude, where did you get this?

• 15:48H. Foley?

  Troubled home, that young man. The grades not good. Parental supervision nonexistent.

• 15:58H. Foley?

  No, thank you.

• 15:59Speaker 02

  One of those kids that like emancipated himself.

• 16:01H. Foley?

  Had his shirt off a lot.

• 16:03Speaker 02

  He did.

• 16:04H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 16:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:05H. Foley?

  I know that kid.

• 16:06Speaker 02

  It was like, he was, meeting those kids where you're like, "Oh, you're an older salt. Like, you've lived a life I have not lived." Do you know what I mean?

• 16:14H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 16:14Speaker 02

  He's wise, but edgy.

• 16:16H. Foley?

  Your parents have loved you.

• 16:17Speaker 02

  Well, debatable. I don't talk to my father no more.

• 16:19H. Foley?

  Lot of holes in the wall over at Peaches' house. Lot of busted drywall.

• 16:24Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 16:25H. Foley?

  Dirty carpets. Yeah, but something about Oriframes.

• 16:27Speaker 02

  Baby, scream it from the rafters, Oriframes.

• 16:29H. Foley?

  Let me tell you this. All people really want out of this holiday season is to see what other people are doing.

• 16:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:36H. Foley?

  Especially people that they love. If they can't be there, get an Orifram, alright? If you're jammed up on last minute Christmas ideas, Orifram, Orifram, Orifram. You get the frame, you put it up on the counter, you upload pictures. That way grandma- Or your Aunt Stacy, or your Uncle Mike, or Uncle Dave can see what the hell's going on. That's all they want.

• 16:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, also, you're like, you're top of mind for some of these old, these older, these older people in your lives.

• 17:03H. Foley?

  Charlie got that for me.

• 17:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, and then they're seeing it every day. They're seeing pictures of you and the family every day. You might end up in a will. They might give you a bigger slice of the pie, you know what I mean? Yeah, all jokes aside, it is, for me, the easiest way to knock out people on my Christmas list, or a frame. Boom, send it. Boom, send it. There. Upload the pictures, the messages. Easy peasy. And right now, you can save on the perfect gift by visiting AuraFrames.com to get $35 off Aura Frames' best-selling Carver Matte Frames by using the promo code GARBAGE at checkout. That's Aura, A-U-R-A, Frames.com, promo code GARBAGE. This deal is exclusive to AYG listeners.

• 17:38H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah.

• 17:38Speaker 02

  So get yours now, just in time for the holidays.

• 17:41H. Foley?

  Holidays.

• 17:41Speaker 02

  Terms and conditions apply. Do it.

• 17:42H. Foley?

  Do it. Gag, today's episode is brought to you by Acorns.

• 17:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:46H. Foley?

  Acorns makes it easy to start automatically investing and saving for you, your kids, and your retirement, even during the holidays.

• 17:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:53H. Foley?

  You don't need to be an expert. Acorns will recommend a diversified portfolio that matches your needs.

• 17:59Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 18:00H. Foley?

  You also don't need a lot of time. You can create your Acorns account and start automatically investing in about five minutes, baby. I did it about three and a half. I'm in the goddamn game.

• 18:08Speaker 02

  You ain't lying.

• 18:09H. Foley?

  Tell you that right now.

• 18:10Speaker 02

  Kids playing the markets.

• 18:11H. Foley?

  Woo wee, a lot of cash rolling around in there.

• 18:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, and you don't need to be rich.

• 18:16H. Foley?

  About four hundred.

• 18:16Speaker 03

  Hosts Thanksgiving with industry-leading quality standards from Whole Foods Market. There are no antibiotics in their meat department, ever, so carve up turkey and spiral-cut ham with peace of mind. Shop organic sides like stuffing mix and cranberry sauce from 365 brand. And guess what? All their delectable pies are made with no high-fructose corn syrup. Gourmet Thanksgiving flavors with the quality you want, only at Whole Foods Market.

• 18:47Speaker 04

  Born in Texas, made in America, that's Valero. Keeping America moving, rain or shine, day or night, 365 days a year. Giving back to our communities and helping businesses thrive. We're proud to fuel the people who keep this country moving. So whether you're exploring new roads or heading down ones you know, we're here, fueling drives coast to coast. Proudly American, proudly getting you where you need to be. Right now, Valero.

• 19:15Speaker 02

  Acorns lets you get started with spare money you've got right now. It's the easiest way to do it. That could be $5 a day or even just your spare change. That's right, Acorns can round up every purchase you make to the next dollar and automatically invest your spare change for you. So you're in the game, you're taking care of future.

• 19:33H. Foley?

  Plus, they show you what your investment could possibly be down the road.

• 19:36Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 19:37H. Foley?

  That's a fun number.

• 19:37Speaker 02

  And you can get bonus investments just for buying the stuff you need and the brands you love. I've been using it for years. It's the only way I've been able to squirrel away, no pun intended, a couple of bucks for retirement because I can't save. I can't save. Acorns has made it so simple, so easy, it's fantastic. Uh, this is a paid endorsement. Compensation provides incentive to positively promote Acorns investing. Involves risk. Acorn Advisors LLC, an SEC registered investment advisor. View important disclosures at acorns.com/garbage. Right now and head to acorns.com/garbage or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing in your future today. One more time, head to acorns.com/garbage or download the Acorns app to start saving and investing for your future today. Do it.

• 20:22H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 20:22Speaker 02

  Um, is it garbage if your parents moved you into the basement when you were nine? I got a TV to keep the ghost away.

• 20:28H. Foley?

  Jesus Christ.

• 20:30Speaker 02

  Dude, that's fucking, at nine? That's bad. I did it when I was probably nine, into college.

• 20:36H. Foley?

  What sort of deformity did he have? That's where you put the evil twin.

• 20:41Speaker 02

  Throw his steak down there.

• 20:43H. Foley?

  That's crazy. At nine.

• 20:46Speaker 02

  Dude, that's.

• 20:47H. Foley?

  You're the first line of defense. You know that had a storm door going out to the.

• 20:51Speaker 02

  That doesn't sound like a nice basement either.

• 20:53H. Foley?

  No.

• 20:54Speaker 02

  I would even say there's probably no storm door. That was a fire hazard.

• 20:58H. Foley?

  Oh, you think? I bet you she had one of those tornado doors. It's always scared the fuck out of me.

• 21:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, the Bilco doors or whatever.

• 21:06H. Foley?

  Spider City.

• 21:06Speaker 02

  Um, we never had those. Uh, but yeah, I mean, oh man, nine years old?

• 21:13H. Foley?

  That's insane.

• 21:14Speaker 02

  On a different floor from your fucking parents?

• 21:16H. Foley?

  Two floors down.

• 21:17Speaker 02

  I don't know, there might not, this might have been a.

• 21:19H. Foley?

  They wouldn't even get ya. No, if it had a basement, I doubt it had just one floor. They were up there probably chilling. They probably knocked down the wall, stretch it out for them, threw the kid in the basement.

• 21:29Speaker 02

  Walk-in closet.

• 21:30H. Foley?

  That's fucked up. Nine.

• 21:33Speaker 02

  It sounds like, I mean, like I get like at some age you wanna go like, I wanna have my own space and it's like, you know, you wanna feel like older and some responsibility, but. Fucking nine, dude.

• 21:42H. Foley?

  The fantasy of that was always better than the reality of it.

• 21:46Speaker 02

  Dude, I was scared when I did it at 20 years. I moved home from college for the summer and I moved down the basement so I could watch my films.

• 21:54Speaker 02

  They privacy.

• 21:55H. Foley?

  I've seen that basement.

• 21:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, dude.

• 21:57H. Foley?

  They half finished?

• 21:58Speaker 02

  No, it's been half finished for so long.

• 22:01H. Foley?

  Yeah, no thanks.

• 22:02Speaker 02

  Been flooded.

• 22:03H. Foley?

  Not to mention the radon or whatever, the carbon monoxide down there. You're the freak, you're like the canary in the fucking, in the mine. They go down and they know you're dead, they fucking get the hell out of there.

• 22:13Speaker 02

  Well, it was even trashier when I did it, cuz we had moved a bunch of, that was, we never used it, so that was the storage of all like the furniture, cuz my family can never throw out furniture. It'd be like, there was furniture from like my stepdad's townhouse that he lived in, he moved it down.

• 22:28H. Foley?

  Mix and match?

• 22:29Speaker 02

  So it was all just, but it was just storage, it wasn't even together. And then I got down there, I'm like, make this into a fucking, turn this into fucking John Flannery's if you catch my drift.

• 22:38H. Foley?

  Combining styles?

• 22:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, dude.

• 22:40H. Foley?

  You got a couple of high tops down there?

• 22:43Speaker 02

  Oh, you need two by the bar. Give me 15 minutes, smoking or non? Uh, and I just, I assembled it into like a living room and I put a bed in the corner, a nice little nightstand.

• 22:54H. Foley?

  You ever have any ladies down there?

• 22:56Speaker 02

  My mom would come down to clean up.

• 22:58H. Foley?

  Get your socks? You never, you never brought a girl home?

• 23:02Speaker 02

  Not to Denise's. I mean, later, yeah.

• 23:05H. Foley?

  Later, what's later than?

• 23:06Speaker 02

  Like in like college and stuff.

• 23:08H. Foley?

  Yeah, that's what I mean. You moved down there after college.

• 23:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, not after college.

• 23:13H. Foley?

  During college.

• 23:14Speaker 02

  I want to say it was the summers of college.

• 23:16H. Foley?

  Okay, you were down in the basement, doing your thing.

• 23:18Speaker 02

  Thinking I was like doing it.

• 23:20H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 23:20Speaker 02

  Thinking I was working, I was laboring, I was digging ditches.

• 23:25H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 23:25Speaker 02

  Pretty good shape-ish. I was, I'm telling you. Uh, there was like every-

• 23:31H. Foley?

  You were no peaches, I can tell you that.

• 23:33Speaker 02

  I was not.

• 23:37Speaker 02

  I was eating a lot of those gummy peaches. Get my hands on them.

• 23:40H. Foley?

  I never liked those.

• 23:41Speaker 02

  You're nuts.

• 23:42H. Foley?

  Hated those.

• 23:43Speaker 02

  You're crazy.

• 23:44H. Foley?

  That was old lady candy.

• 23:45Speaker 02

  The gummies?

• 23:46H. Foley?

  Yeah, the ones with the shit, the sugar on the outside.

• 23:48Speaker 02

  All broads can't eat that, they got dentures. Fucking pull that ripper crown out.

• 23:52H. Foley?

  Nah, I was never, never a big fan.

• 23:56H. Foley?

  I liked the sugar, don't get me wrong. There's something about the texture of them, I feel like I was biting in the duck skin or something like that.

• 24:02Speaker 02

  I know, you mean, a couple of the, a couple of those where like a feather used to be?

• 24:07H. Foley?

  Give me the willies. Like a chuckle, you ever have a chuckle? Old school jelly candy?

• 24:12Speaker 02

  Uh uh, jelly candy?

• 24:13H. Foley?

  Yeah, it's the same thing. Just a little bit less firm, feel weird on your teeth.

• 24:18Speaker 02

  No, it's not for me. I like them sharks though. The white bottom sharks.

• 24:22H. Foley?

  What are we, nuts?

• 24:23Speaker 02

  That's in the pe- that's like the same thing as the peaches though.

• 24:25H. Foley?

  Nah, peaches are different.

• 24:26Speaker 02

  You're crazy.

• 24:27H. Foley?

  Different consistency.

• 24:30H. Foley?

  I'll do this all day. You'll never win. Telling you right now. I know my gummy candies.

• 24:37Speaker 02

  Hey, you know what, I have to bend the knee when I see fit.

• 24:39H. Foley?

  So you did bring broads down there?

• 24:43Speaker 02

  I don't think down there.

• 24:45H. Foley?

  You ever kiss the girl? Let's start there.

• 24:48Speaker 02

  Once. She was-

• 24:50H. Foley?

  Would you have had to sneak her down there? Were you allowed to fornicate in a goddamn Catholic house?

• 24:58Speaker 02

  My mom wasn't cool with me fucking girls.

• 25:01H. Foley?

  You're in college, you're a grown man, to a degree.

• 25:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I wasn't dating anybody seriously, so I wasn't like, I was just like, hey, this is Tina. I met her at Black Bull or whatever. She works third shift at the pub.

• 25:13H. Foley?

  Some lady her age.

• 25:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:17Speaker 02

  It's just true, you guys graduated together? Oh, hey Denise. Nice place.

• 25:26H. Foley?

  Your boys are real stallion.

• 25:28Speaker 02

  Oh, dude, telling a, telling a mom. Who's your age that her boys is, I just gave, oh, that wasn't, that just made me, oh, cringe dude. Your boys are real stallion.

• 25:42H. Foley?

  This one can go all night.

• 25:44Speaker 02

  I cannot.

• 25:50H. Foley?

  Playing 007 maybe.

• 25:51Speaker 02

  Ah.

• 25:53H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 25:53Speaker 02

  I did have my DVD, I had a DVD player down there, couple of bootlegs, they were still banging. Nice call, it smelled so bad down there dude.

• 26:02H. Foley?

  Down there whacking it.

• 26:03Speaker 02

  Whaling on myself.

• 26:06H. Foley?

  Yikes.

• 26:06Speaker 02

  The masturbatorium.

• 26:08H. Foley?

  Nine, nine years old though, man.

• 26:10Speaker 02

  That's too young.

• 26:11H. Foley?

  Yeah, that's, I mean, I think that's like a fucking wellness check. You got a kid in the, that's a kid in the basement.

• 26:17Speaker 02

  That is a kid in the basement.

• 26:19H. Foley?

  I don't care what you did to it.

• 26:22Speaker 02

  I mean, if it was new, my, my boy Pat moved to the basement in like junior high maybe.

• 26:27H. Foley?

  All right, junior high, sure. And I bet you he still ran up them steps a couple of times because he got the willies down there. The heat kicked on or something.

• 26:37Speaker 02

  I don't know, but that was like a proper finished basement, that was like.

• 26:40H. Foley?

  I had a TV to keep the ghosts away.

• 26:43Speaker 02

  Man, I still need it.

• 26:44H. Foley?

  Why do we think that's gonna work?

• 26:46Speaker 02

  I just think you're not, we don't like to, dude, a hotel room, I gotta have the TV on. I'll even put my headphones in.

• 26:52H. Foley?

  I was in an old hotel, uh, a few weeks ago and the one, the TV was in a cabinet. And the one door. Right, two, I was down there, I was, I was there twice over the la, over the last month. Different rooms. And the, the door, the one of the cabinets just constantly would just open slowly.

• 27:15H. Foley?

  Fell asleep and I woke up like in the middle of the night and they were both like that.

• 27:19Speaker 02

  Looking over ya, what the hell?

• 27:20H. Foley?

  Slept with the shower on for the rest of the night. Fucking creep me out.

• 27:25Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, let's see. This one's from Blue Chew Baka, great name. $10, first time, long time. When was the last time you's had genuine rug burn? Jesus Christ, dude.

• 27:37H. Foley?

  For a while, it's a little different, but for a while.

• 27:41Speaker 02

  The chafin?

• 27:42H. Foley?

  No, chafin, forget about it. I don't get that that bad anymore, but I still get a reminder of it every summer. I used to have it. When I was waiting tables, oh my god. It was like fucking a topography map down there. It was brutal. Brutal. Burn, searing, grinding.

• 28:03Speaker 02

  A real good food, real good food handler, I'm sure. Fucking sneezing, herpes, fucking ringworm.

• 28:09H. Foley?

  I'd have to go in there and straighten it out every once in a while.

• 28:11Speaker 02

  I told ya I saw a guy.

• 28:14Speaker 02

  Cook or something. I was working at a restaurant, I was young, I was 12 probably, busting tables. He had, I think he had a bad case of jock itch. Walked back in and walked back into the supply closet, fucking handful of cornstarch, it went straight down and I went, I remember being like, "I have a lot to learn till I'm a man." Like that was like, that was, that was like a, I was like something I feel like would be done in war, like, "You gotta get back, he's a pizza maker."

• 28:39H. Foley?

  He's in there making a roux. Yikes. Thicking it up a little bit.

• 28:44Speaker 02

  Beer battered down there, dude.

• 28:47H. Foley?

  He's gonna grab me a Guinness, will ya? Get these fried pickles ready.

• 28:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's tough. I haven't had rug, I mean as a kid, when you're wrestling, my brother would like drag you by the foot or whatever.

• 28:58H. Foley?

  Vicious.

• 28:59Speaker 02

  Oh, man.

• 29:00H. Foley?

  On the AstroTurf was brutal too, if it was on a porch or something like that. What I was gonna say is, for some reason, there's certain bars or countertops where in the summer, if I like lean my elbow on it and it's there for a long time, it like peels it off or I get like a burn. You ever get that?

• 29:18Speaker 02

  I don't think so.

• 29:20H. Foley?

  It's bad. Shit stings.

• 29:21Speaker 02

  I mean, how specific. Certain bars or countertops in the summertime. I'm not saying you're wrong, but I've never-

• 29:28H. Foley?

  Certain lacquer on it.

• 29:29Speaker 02

  Okay. And how long are you leaning on it?

• 29:31H. Foley?

  I guess a while. I can't remember-

• 29:33Speaker 02

  Were you playing mahjong? What the fuck?

• 29:35H. Foley?

  Uh, where would I? I think I would get it at the lantern a lot. Like, if we were in there and, like, we were posted up. And like, I had my, my elbow on the, on the table.

• 29:44Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 29:44H. Foley?

  I'd pull it away and it would, like, rip. Like, you know, sometimes when you put a heater in and your lips are dry? And then you rip off half your lip?

• 29:50Speaker 02

  That sucks.

• 29:51H. Foley?

  Ah, that ruins the fucking night. Try to eat a piece of pizza at the end of the night, but that fucking burns.

• 29:58Speaker 02

  Man, the trials and tribulations.

• 30:00H. Foley?

  You ain't lying, sister. It ain't easy.

• 30:03Speaker 02

  I know.

• 30:04H. Foley?

  It's not kitsch, athlete's foot. At all.

• 30:07Speaker 02

  Super good looking. Huge hog.

• 30:12Speaker 02

  Huge balls. I apologize. Big old sack on him.

• 30:15H. Foley?

  Woo! Like a Muppet's eyeballs looking at you.

• 30:18Speaker 02

  Yeah. Uh, alright, this one's from David F. $10 homie never had one read. Are you garbage if your dad tried setting you up with his younger coworker, but you passed and now she's your stepmom?

• 30:29H. Foley?

  Hey, I gave you a shot. I gave you a shot.

• 30:32Speaker 02

  I told you she was easy. I told you-

• 30:34H. Foley?

  Idiot.

• 30:34Speaker 02

  It was a sure thing, dude.

• 30:36H. Foley?

  Man.

• 30:37Speaker 02

  That's nuts.

• 30:38H. Foley?

  Has your mom ever tried to set you up with anybody?

• 30:40Speaker 02

  Yeah. One time, it was like, it was, she was related to- I've told you that. I've had to have told you that. She was related to me. It was like a cousin of a cousin or something. It was-

• 30:49H. Foley?

  Did your mom know she was a cousin of a cousin?

• 30:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:51H. Foley?

  That's how they do it down there. Keep the fortune in the family.

• 30:56Speaker 02

  We were in Wildwood in a condo, and she was like, "Yeah, she's nice." I was like, "What?" "The fuck you talking about?" I'm like, "She's my-"

• 31:03H. Foley?

  She's your sister's kid. What's the matter with you?

• 31:06Speaker 02

  I'm like, "She's my fucking cousin." She's like, "Yeah, that's my marriage." I'm like, "That's too much."

• 31:12H. Foley?

  Stop being a brute, you fucking pussy. You're down there in the basement with your videos.

• 31:18Speaker 02

  What's all this stuff? I heard you beat a stallion.

• 31:24Speaker 02

  You fucking peckerwood, get out there.

• 31:32Speaker 02

  Tate is road to Keenons.

• 31:39Speaker 02

  I remember being like, are you fucking, I was down there with a buddy too, I think. She must have just thought I was gay.

• 31:47H. Foley?

  Trying to find that.

• 31:48Speaker 02

  I'm down there with my boy.

• 31:51Speaker 02

  We're going up, we're walking under the boardwalk and stuff.

• 31:56H. Foley?

  Like Nathan Lane and Robin Williams in the birdcage.

• 32:02H. Foley?

  Get off that tandem bike! Yelling at you.

• 32:07Speaker 02

  We're doing chicken fights in the ocean and stuff.

• 32:12H. Foley?

  We gotta go check out an art exhibit. Oh my god!

• 32:20H. Foley?

  You know, he kinda liked tennis. I'm calling your father. Jesus Christ. Tried to set you up. What's a cousin look like?

• 32:29Speaker 02

  Just cute.

• 32:30H. Foley?

  Yeah?

• 32:32Speaker 02

  I'm trying to think.

• 32:34H. Foley?

  I don't think you've ever told me that. Now, my memory is pretty bad. Due to the drug use.

• 32:39Speaker 02

  Sure, she was a peach ring, you'd remember.

• 32:43Speaker 02

  She was some sort of gummy candy, I told you. I don't even really remember the... It might have been like...

• 32:54H. Foley?

  Is this like down the shore, like when you guys were shackled up in that one-room flop house?

• 32:58Speaker 02

  Uh, I mean, there's a lot of those one-room flop houses.

• 33:01H. Foley?

  So she was like in there. It was like 30 is in there.

• 33:03Speaker 02

  Nah, she was next to us, I think, or something.

• 33:06H. Foley?

  Easy pickings.

• 33:07Speaker 02

  She don't, she wanted no parts of me. I wasn't, uh...

• 33:13Speaker 02

  It wasn't like she was waiting for me, and like I was like, nah, dang.

• 33:18H. Foley?

  I keep my options open. Summer just started. I don't wanna pick myself.

• 33:23Speaker 02

  Can't be tied down.

• 33:27H. Foley?

  Free spirit.

• 33:29Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, I don't, I wanna say it was like, my aunt by marriage. I don't really know, I only ever saw her that summer, I think, but I hear her name.

• 33:41H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 33:42Speaker 02

  Like, oh, I forget her name, but like Tiffany, you know, and I'm like-

• 33:45H. Foley?

  Still waiting for ya. Hi Kevin.

• 33:49H. Foley?

  Um, I had, uh, not a setup, but they-

• 33:53Speaker 02

  I think she was getting clean at the time, too.

• 33:55H. Foley?

  What do you mean?

• 33:55Speaker 02

  I think she had, I think she-

• 33:56H. Foley?

  Oh, really?

• 33:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 33:58H. Foley?

  Oh, man.

• 33:59Speaker 02

  I think she, I think she was coming off the, the peach rings.

• 34:04H. Foley?

  Coming off the needle?

• 34:05Speaker 02

  Coming off the needle.

• 34:06H. Foley?

  Jesus Christ, trying to sell ya with damaged goods, what the fuck?

• 34:11Speaker 02

  Everybody loves a comeback story.

• 34:13H. Foley?

  Thank God. Man, your mom did not think highly of you.

• 34:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, now look at me, ma, huh?

• 34:21H. Foley?

  Taking you down to the halfway house, what about her, what about her, what about her? Jesus Christ.

• 34:27Speaker 02

  I could be wrong, I forget, I really forget who she was.

• 34:31H. Foley?

  My mom, uh, she worked at the dentist office. There was a lady that worked there, her daughter was what we call in the business, a fucking dime piece.

• 34:42Speaker 02

  I was trying to hook, what age we talking?

• 34:45H. Foley?

  Uh, I was in college, for sure. Fit, trim, this broad, was about eight billion light years out of my league.

• 34:55Speaker 02

  Was she your age?

• 34:56H. Foley?

  Maybe like a year younger, something like that, working there, Italian broad.

• 35:01Speaker 02

  Uh, she was working there.

• 35:02H. Foley?

  She was working there, she was in the office.

• 35:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:05H. Foley?

  I had a new shot.

• 35:06Speaker 02

  Did you go and like, hang out?

• 35:09H. Foley?

  I would hang out for, you know, when I'd go in for a cleaning, but it was tough because, I mean, my mom's dentist office, getting a fucking cleaning, like a loser. Not paying.

• 35:21Speaker 02

  You got no vacation, so what are you doing later?

• 35:25H. Foley?

  Yeah, looking like a real bozo.

• 35:27Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 35:27H. Foley?

  But they like tried to like cultivate that a little bit.

• 35:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:31H. Foley?

  And she looked at me like I was fucking a peach ring, if you know what I mean.

• 35:35Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 35:35H. Foley?

  No shot.

• 35:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, been there, dog.

• 35:38H. Foley?

  Rough.

• 35:38Speaker 02

  Um, yeah, but I don't, uh, I mean, that's a tough look. Your dad, how does that, I could never get that out of my head of like...

• 35:47H. Foley?

  That means your dad wanted to bang her the whole time and would have lived vicariously through you and would eventually have made a move on her if she became your wife.

• 35:57H. Foley?

  Crazy. And he starts banging her, or they marries her.

• 36:01Speaker 02

  Uh-huh.

• 36:03Speaker 02

  I remember after my father got divorced for the second time, uh, I was a young adult at this point.

• 36:09H. Foley?

  Did he ever?

• 36:10Speaker 02

  I was in my twenties. I was in my early twenties. I was probably twenty, twenty-one.

• 36:14H. Foley?

  He kept it on the level, right? He never went for like a younger generation?

• 36:20Speaker 02

  No, I remember...

• 36:22H. Foley?

  Good-looking guy, successful.

• 36:24Speaker 02

  Those two things are up for debate.

• 36:26H. Foley?

  Could have yanked your bra right out of your hands.

• 36:29Speaker 02

  Hey, that's my drug addict.

• 36:31H. Foley?

  I was gonna say, he could have took a little bit of fentanyl right away from you.

• 36:35Speaker 02

  But there was, uh, yeah, I remember having to like see him like talk to a girl, like we'd be, you know, we used to hang out at Chickies and Pizza Lot.

• 36:43H. Foley?

  Ooh.

• 36:45Speaker 02

  After the job, we'd go to Chickies and get some beers.

• 36:48H. Foley?

  You would see him macking a little bit.

• 36:49Speaker 02

  I mean, not, you would, I, you know, you see when a guy...

• 36:53H. Foley?

  A gentleman, of course. Yeah, but wow, I've never been in that situation.

• 36:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's, it's, it's a life-changing perspective.

• 37:02H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 37:02Speaker 02

  To from a guy, I mean, he was married to my mom and then married to my stepmom, so it was like, I didn't, this is a good new...

• 37:07H. Foley?

  I never saw my dad, never saw my dad in any type of sexual situation.

• 37:12Speaker 02

  I mean, he wasn't like, he wasn't swinging from a sex swing. He's, he's talking to the bartender, but that's when you go out with those...

• 37:21H. Foley?

  You know what I mean?

• 37:21Speaker 02

  Sure, of course, that's what I'm, that's what I'm telling you. But when you go out with a bunch of construction workers for fucking beers at two, and there's a cute bartender working the day shift.

• 37:30H. Foley?

  Ah, must suck for them, man.

• 37:32Speaker 02

  They're like fucking dogs now. They're all shitting on each other.

• 37:35H. Foley?

  Poor women.

• 37:36Speaker 02

  Hey, what's up, little dick? And like fucking, they're, they're, and they're playing a little because they like to tip.

• 37:41H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 37:41Speaker 02

  It's a, it's a, it's a game of give and take, daddy-o.

• 37:44H. Foley?

  Hey, Sheila, how you doing?

• 37:46Speaker 02

  Ah, yeah, I'm here. They're tipping too much.

• 37:48H. Foley?

  Some wildebeest that looks like me, like, I think I got a shot with her.

• 37:51Speaker 02

  Got a welder's helmet on. Yeah, just got a new truck. Yeah, I just had a lot, watch a lot of that stuff.

• 38:00H. Foley?

  Yikes.

• 38:01Speaker 02

  It was tough.

• 38:02H. Foley?

  Man.

• 38:04Speaker 02

  You banged that bro?

• 38:07Speaker 02

  It's crazy.

• 38:08H. Foley?

  Yeah, I never saw my-

• 38:09Speaker 02

  That was one, one line I heard on a job site that like forever uh, changed the way I looked at the guy. He said something, something, something. I might have to dick her down. And I was like, dude, what? You're fucking 275 pounds. You don't even the-

• 38:29H. Foley?

  Yeah?

• 38:32H. Foley?

  Hey, dick son.

• 38:34Speaker 02

  I'm gonna have to dick her down. I was like, dude.

• 38:37H. Foley?

  Soon as you take your compression sock off your, off your testicles.

• 38:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:41H. Foley?

  Push your hernia back in.

• 38:45Speaker 02

  Dick her down.

• 38:49H. Foley?

  I never had the confidence to be like that.

• 38:52Speaker 02

  No, what? I don't have the confidence. I'm married and don't have the confidence.

• 38:55H. Foley?

  And I, you'd hear dudes that like, be like, there's no way that that girl would, she wouldn't even step on your balls.

• 39:06Speaker 02

  What kind of shit are you and your dad into?

• 39:10H. Foley?

  You know what I mean? Right?

• 39:12Speaker 02

  Hey dad, this bro won't even kick me in the plums.

• 39:18Speaker 02

  You believe this?

• 39:18H. Foley?

  Let's get out of here.

• 39:19Speaker 02

  He's probably a lesbian.

• 39:21H. Foley?

  Let's go to Center City and check out Rouge.

• 39:24Speaker 02

  Go hit Red Sky.

• 39:27H. Foley?

  What?

• 39:27Speaker 02

  Go hit Red Sky. Red Sky, Blue Martini.

• 39:31H. Foley?

  Okay, but let's talk about Soul.

• 39:33Speaker 02

  Oh, shout out to Soul gang.

• 39:34H. Foley?

  Those out of the office gummies that hit just so right.

• 39:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:39H. Foley?

  Long day at work, kids are bothering you, wife's busting your balls, you're looking for something to chill out a little bit when you get home? A lot of times they're reaching for the bottle.

• 39:47Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 39:48H. Foley?

  That's no good for you.

• 39:49Speaker 02

  Not no more.

• 39:50H. Foley?

  Grab a Soul out of the office gummies, nice, relaxing, not too much, you're not bugging out and freaking out and thinking the feds are looking for you. You're just chilling, baby. That's how out of the office does it.

• 40:04Speaker 03

  From Whole Foods Market, there are no antibiotics in their meat department ever. So carve up turkey and spiral cut ham with peace of mind. Shop organic sides like stuffing mix and cranberry sauce from 365 brand. And guess what? All their delectable pies are made with no high fructose corn syrup. Gourmet Thanksgiving flavors with the quality you want, only at Whole Foods Market.

• 40:31Speaker 04

  Born in Texas, made in America. That's Valero, keeping America moving, rain or shine, day or night, 365 days a year. Giving back to our communities and helping businesses thrive. We're proud to fuel the people who keep this country moving. So whether you're exploring new roads or heading down ones you know, we're here, fueling drives coast to coast. Proudly American, proudly getting you where you need to be. Right now, Valero.

• 40:59H. Foley?

  So do yourself a favor, mellow out at the end of the day with Soul out of the office gummies.

• 41:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, you can buy hemp derived THC products legally anywhere in the U.S.

• 41:08H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 41:08Speaker 02

  Through Soul, baby. This podcast is sponsored by Soul. Uh, and the new micro, the new out of office gummies are the perfectly microdose with hemp derived THC and CBD to give you that any day, that chilling on the beach vibe, baby. Um, the out of office gummies help you get that much needed me time. And at the end of the day, or during the day, whatever you do, they're convenient and delicious. Uh, and right now, this holiday season, the give the gift of Soul. Head to getsoul.com and use the code garbage for 30%. Holy smokes, 30% off, holy gummies, 30% off your order.

• 41:42H. Foley?

  That's a lot of gummies.

• 41:42Speaker 02

  That's 30% off your order using the code garbage. One last time, getsoul.com code garbage for 30% off. Do it.

• 41:49H. Foley?

  Do it. Adam and Eve, Kippy.

• 41:52Speaker 02

  Put your wiener in something, put something in your butt, let's go.

• 41:55H. Foley?

  Talking about ho, ho, ho, gang. You want something coming down the chimney or going up the chimney? Get yourself over to Adam and Eve and get yourself straightened out. It's almost 2025, gang. Let's have a little fucking fun. Adam and Eve, number one, baby.

• 42:09Speaker 02

  Buddy.

• 42:10H. Foley?

  Number one. Let's get weird, let's do it.

• 42:13Speaker 02

  If you're in a new relationship, it's good. If you're in an old relationship, it's even better. If you like to party by yourself, they got you covered.

• 42:20H. Foley?

  Animal panties, sex wing, dildos, vibrator. Whatever.

• 42:24Speaker 02

  Cali whackers.

• 42:25H. Foley?

  Get them all.

• 42:26Speaker 02

  Yeah. Adam and Eve is offering, uh, 50% off.

• 42:29H. Foley?

  Jesus Christ.

• 42:30Speaker 02

  They want you to have fun. 50% off just about any item, plus free shipping, which includes rush processing. Cause if you gotta get going, they know, they're there. And more than that, they want you to make your life easy, but they offer discreet shipping, so the neighbor ain't all up in your business.

• 42:44H. Foley?

  That's right.

• 42:44Speaker 02

  Uh, your privacy is priority, plus 100% free shipping with rush processing on your entire order. Doesn't matter how much you spend or what you buy, all will be packaged and sent discreetly for free and fast, daddy-o. Just go to adamandeve.com, select any one item, it could be an adventurous new toy, or anything you desire. Uh, just enter our code garbage at checkout, that's garbage, G-A-R-B-A-G-E, at adamandeve.com. You know it, you love it. This is an exclusive offer specific to Are You Garbage, so be sure to use the code garbage. Let them know we sent you to get your discount, plus 100% free shipping, and get it fast with rush processing code garbage. Do it.

• 43:20H. Foley?

  Did he have a little game back then?

• 43:22Speaker 02

  He's a very-

• 43:23H. Foley?

  Successful guy.

• 43:24Speaker 02

  You keep saying that, and that's-

• 43:26H. Foley?

  On the surface.

• 43:27Speaker 02

  Sure, okay.

• 43:28H. Foley?

  And when I seen him, he in shape, dressed sharp, probably did a lot of damage.

• 43:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, to our family.

• 43:37H. Foley?

  Be that as it may.

• 43:39Speaker 02

  You wanna make an omelet, you're gonna have to crack some eggs.

• 43:44Speaker 02

  Um, yeah, very charming guy. That's where I get it.

• 43:50H. Foley?

  Man, and you s- what does that feel like to you?

• 43:53Speaker 02

  What?

• 43:53H. Foley?

  You should be the one doing that. This guy's gotta do everything for you? You're sitting there fucking chicken fingers in your- I ain't doing, I'm driving.

• 44:03Speaker 02

  I don't know why I'm yelling at her.

• 44:05H. Foley?

  Cause you're an idiot.

• 44:06Speaker 02

  Can I have more barbecue sauce and napkins, please?

• 44:09H. Foley?

  Shut up with the barbecue sauce, eh?

• 44:12Speaker 02

  Turn this around, this kid's eating again.

• 44:15H. Foley?

  Stepping on his game.

• 44:17Speaker 02

  Trying to take this world down.

• 44:20H. Foley?

  To complete a poker machine or something, eh?

• 44:24H. Foley?

  I haven't finished my ranch dressing yet. Alright, okay, yeah. That's my son Kevin. Anyway, beauty school, huh?

• 44:35H. Foley?

  Man.

• 44:37H. Foley?

  Fucking dirt all over your face, bro.

• 44:39Speaker 02

  I have another refill.

• 44:42H. Foley?

  You have mug root beer here? Up.

• 44:54H. Foley?

  Smells funny in here.

• 44:57Speaker 02

  It's called pussy.

• 45:00Speaker 02

  It's called trim, dude.

• 45:02H. Foley?

  Yeah, your underwear's sticking out the back of your dress, lady.

• 45:06H. Foley?

  Shut up.

• 45:08Speaker 02

  Stink, dude.

• 45:10H. Foley?

  Your dad's in there macking.

• 45:13H. Foley?

  Fresh splash of Bruton.

• 45:16H. Foley?

  Sharp.

• 45:18H. Foley?

  God. You're making love to a chicken cheesesteak, Oogie?

• 45:22Speaker 02

  Now, what would you get it? What was the? Get the crab fries at Chickies and Pete's.

• 45:26H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah, that'll close you. Fucking old bay breath over here.

• 45:31Speaker 02

  You smell like a duck.

• 45:36H. Foley?

  It's my son muscles.

• 45:39Speaker 02

  What the fuck you doing?

• 45:40H. Foley?

  Hey, crab fries!

• 45:42Speaker 02

  That's my son bunker.

• 45:48H. Foley?

  I'll do the chum plate special, please. Extra tartar sauce. And your number. Oh, man.

• 45:58Speaker 02

  Did you ever have to do that? Ask a girl for, like, obviously, did you ever strike out? Hey, can I get your number?

• 46:03H. Foley?

  Did I ever strike out?

• 46:06Speaker 02

  I mean, I mean, like, taking a, asking for a number's a big swing. I never, we never had to do it because there was social media by-

• 46:13H. Foley?

  I never really put myself in that position. Because I never had the confidence. I don't think. Did I ever strike out, like, proper strike out?

• 46:24H. Foley?

  I remember one time. Uh.

• 46:27Speaker 02

  The bases loaded.

• 46:29H. Foley?

  Top of the night, fat asses up.

• 46:32Speaker 02

  We're gonna need a big show in our major only here, gang.

• 46:34H. Foley?

  Let's just say they brought the outfield in a little bit.

• 46:36Speaker 02

  Cincinnati shift. Bring it in! This guy stink.

• 46:42H. Foley?

  Oh, I'm sorry, crab fries.

• 46:44Speaker 02

  Hey, they're a local delicacy.

• 46:47H. Foley?

  Uh, um, no, I remember when I was going to community college. Uh.

• 46:55H. Foley?

  There was this girl that I thought kinda liked me and she had like two other guy friends and they invited me to this party. And it was the, it was, man, it was bad. Cause I wasn't good without the crew. And I was just, I, I was that guy. I was that guy nobody knew at the party. And I was really overcompensating. I was like going, hey, what's going on?

• 47:18Speaker 02

  I'm Henry.

• 47:19H. Foley?

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 47:21Speaker 02

  I'm a singer songwriter.

• 47:22H. Foley?

  Yeah. Going acting school. Alright dude. Lucky I didn't get my ass beat. I was in some fucking townhouse community like in Abingdon or Horsham or something like that. Wasn't my crowd. No weed.

• 47:38H. Foley?

  Um, I think we kissed or something like that when I left, but that was it. I saw the next day at school or the, the next week at school and nothing.

• 47:49Speaker 02

  It's a shame.

• 47:49H. Foley?

  Could've been my onion ring breath. I'm not really sure what, what blew it. Yeah.

• 47:56Speaker 02

  Uh, man.

• 47:58H. Foley?

  But I don't think I ever like shot down like, hey, would you wanna go out sometime? No. I'm not an.

• 48:04Speaker 02

  Not asking that.

• 48:05H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 48:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:08H. Foley?

  Let that happen organically. If you're out and you start kissing.

• 48:11Speaker 02

  Let's stretch it out over a couple of weeks.

• 48:15Speaker 02

  Oh, man. Alright, let's see here. This was from Georgia, uh, Georgia. $10 pizza of the month member.

• 48:23H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 48:23Speaker 02

  Is it garbage if your small town has a real life mascot? Ours was a white deer named Snow. They held a funeral when she was hit by a car. God damn, imagine being the dude that kills the mascot.

• 48:34H. Foley?

  You'd have to move.

• 48:35Speaker 02

  Oh, that's bad.

• 48:36H. Foley?

  That's like, what's the mascot on Parks and Rec? Uh, Little Sebastian. Yeah.

• 48:42Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 48:43H. Foley?

  Man. So it was a, it was a wild, a white deer.

• 48:47Speaker 02

  Albino. We had one growing up.

• 48:48H. Foley?

  You did?

• 48:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, not like, you know, it was always in the same field. We would see it, you know, and you'd see it like a couple of times a year.

• 48:55H. Foley?

  Oh, I don't know if I like that. That's an omen.

• 48:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, it reminded me of powder.

• 48:59H. Foley?

  That's a devil right there. That's a fucking shapeshifter.

• 49:02Speaker 02

  There was a full, there was a full white one, then like a half white. It was like half and half, like the back half. Had a white ass on it. Oh, man, I saw a great video of this kid riding his fucking like little moped and he's cooking, he's talking to himself. And the deer jumped and he goes, what the fuck here, whatever. Holy shit.

• 49:18H. Foley?

  He was gucking.

• 49:20Speaker 02

  Uh huh, sure. Um, alright, let's see here, this is a great name. This is from Twisted Schnifter. Uh, Jammed Up $5 Homie Never Have One Red. Is it garbage to say how old you are when you're losing an argument to someone younger than you? Dropping your age at any point is...

• 49:39H. Foley?

  I do that regularly with my nephew.

• 49:41Speaker 02

  I'm 50!

• 49:42H. Foley?

  He's talking shit!

• 49:43Speaker 02

  What do you know?

• 49:44H. Foley?

  You're telling me, I'm 48 years old!

• 49:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:47H. Foley?

  You're 11! 25.

• 49:49Speaker 02

  That's a guy who's got nothing to stand on.

• 49:51H. Foley?

  I got nothing!

• 49:53Speaker 02

  I've done it myself, too. I'm 38 years old, I ain't friggin' doing that!

• 49:57H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 49:59Speaker 02

  It's tough.

• 50:00H. Foley?

  It's different these days. I think we were more respectful publicly to adults. These kids now, they talk shit, run their mouths.

• 50:10Speaker 02

  What are they saying to you?

• 50:11H. Foley?

  All kinds of stuff.

• 50:11Speaker 02

  Calling me fat ass, I can't close.

• 50:17H. Foley?

  Nah, I just think they know everything. You know? They have opinions on, you know, world politics and economics and...

• 50:26Speaker 02

  Which we leave that to you.

• 50:28H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 50:29Speaker 02

  As you all know, we all defer to Henry on those socio-political climate issues.

• 50:35H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 50:35Speaker 02

  Sure, of course. Yeah, that's, I mean, I go to, you're my expert on all that stuff.

• 50:38H. Foley?

  I read the Onion. I know what's going on.

• 50:44Speaker 02

  Oh, fuck, okay. Uh, this one's from Free Mammograms, $10 Sizzly here. Are you garbage if you get snow off your car by just driving really fast?

• 50:54H. Foley?

  I'm all about it.

• 50:55Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 50:55H. Foley?

  But there's a lawn, you're not allowed to do that anymore.

• 50:59Speaker 02

  Where?

• 51:00H. Foley?

  I think in Pennsylvania.

• 51:01Speaker 02

  It can't be a federal law.

• 51:03H. Foley?

  I think it's, I think you have to clean your car off now.

• 51:06Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm, that makes sense.

• 51:07H. Foley?

  I know tractor trailers do.

• 51:08Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, that's, I mean, they'll fucking, they'll decapitate you. What are you talking about? Ice chunk comes off of that? Give me fuck.

• 51:16H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 51:16Speaker 02

  Yeah, tractor trailers have to. I did it the other day. I hopped in a car to get a Wawa. To get a coffee. Maybe a sizzly in the restaurant. I had, dude, I walk in there with all the best intentions of I'm just getting a cup of coffee.

• 51:29H. Foley?

  You gotta get a sizzly.

• 51:30Speaker 02

  And then you stand next to it. They corral you right by them goddamn sizzlys. And if you're there and they're dropping them off when you're waiting there, it's like, I mean, I'm only, I'm only so strong, Henry. But.

• 51:41H. Foley?

  Gang, if you don't have a Wawa near you and you get near one, hopefully it's in the morning, grab a sizzly.

• 51:46Speaker 02

  Yeah. You know what I do love is when people's first time, because we talk about Wawa so much. Homies and bozos that get to go to them, they tag us in pictures of like having my first Wawa. Have, here's the sandwich. Them walking in.

• 51:58H. Foley?

  The bacon, egg and cheese croissant is, there's like, I don't know, they deep fry it or something. There's so much oil in the fucking croissant. It's so good.

• 52:07Speaker 02

  Man.

• 52:08H. Foley?

  Woo.

• 52:09Speaker 02

  Um.

• 52:10H. Foley?

  Yeah, six pack of those.

• 52:12Speaker 02

  But, um, I was driving the other day and it was the first fraud. I got in the car and it was fucking, I was frosted up.

• 52:18H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah?

• 52:18Speaker 02

  But I'm sitting in the car freezing.

• 52:20H. Foley?

  You're not an automatic starter guy?

• 52:22Speaker 02

  I don't have it, I don't think.

• 52:24H. Foley?

  Your, that one car has to have it. It's like a 2023.

• 52:28Speaker 02

  I think it's a 2021. I bought it used.

• 52:33H. Foley?

  Even still.

• 52:34Speaker 02

  I don't know. I gotta check.

• 52:35H. Foley?

  Patty's got one.

• 52:36Speaker 02

  I don't know how to do it. I don't have a button. I don't have a button for it.

• 52:40H. Foley?

  Man, I don't know what I would do. I do that shit from the apartment. I lean out the window so I, till I, till I hear it double beep.

• 52:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't have it, I don't think.

• 52:49H. Foley?

  Fuck that.

• 52:50Speaker 02

  But I'm in the car, it's freezing and I'm fogged up.

• 52:53H. Foley?

  It's so bad.

• 52:54Speaker 02

  And I like, you know, you start spreading the juice. So I start juicing it.

• 52:57H. Foley?

  What, hitting the gas?

• 52:58Speaker 02

  No, well, yeah. I'm revving. I'm redlining this fucking thing. Gotta heat, heat the engine up. But then I'm hitting the windshield wiper fluid to fucking loosen it up. And which works, but then you start driving and it frosts up again. Like fogs over, man.

• 53:12H. Foley?

  And streaks.

• 53:13Speaker 02

  Dude, I was, I was, it was so dangerous, dude. I was driving like, like, real bad. And I was like, I'm gonna fucking kill some, I'm gonna kill myself.

• 53:20H. Foley?

  Do you have an ice scraper in the car?

• 53:22Speaker 02

  Nah.

• 53:24H. Foley?

  Put that in your Christmas list. Sure. I scrape our little Rain-X, what you need. Alright.

• 53:30Speaker 02

  Just roll the dice, just do this.

• 53:31H. Foley?

  I've scraped so many cars with such poor equipment in such bad conditions.

• 53:36Speaker 02

  You know what works great? A CD. You find some mixed.

• 53:40H. Foley?

  A CD case.

• 53:41Speaker 02

  CD works better.

• 53:43H. Foley?

  A CD, the round?

• 53:44Speaker 02

  Yeah. It's got a real good edge to it, yeah, it's great. You find some, because you didn't have CD cases because they were mostly burnt CDs and they were in a...

• 53:53H. Foley?

  I remember using CD cases.

• 53:54Speaker 02

  I'm not saying you didn't, I have as well.

• 53:56H. Foley?

  Credit cards are the worst.

• 53:57Speaker 02

  Oh, been there.

• 53:58H. Foley?

  Using your ATM.

• 54:00Speaker 02

  My dad always with the credit card.

• 54:03Speaker 02

  Always. And he would only do his side. I'm flying blind over here, dude. I got no eyes.

• 54:08H. Foley?

  Can't see the ops coming. That's the deal.

• 54:11Speaker 02

  Fucking frosted me out, dude.

• 54:13H. Foley?

  He would only do his...

• 54:15Speaker 02

  And only like, only the pocket until we got cooking.

• 54:17H. Foley?

  Yeah, so you couldn't get away with that now. You have to scrape your car, I think. I'll pull you over, give you a ticket.

• 54:23Speaker 02

  Do you have anything on that?

• 54:25Speaker 05

  Yeah, it's illegal only in Alaska, Connecticut, Georgia, Massachusetts, Wisconsin.

• 54:30Speaker 02

  This is America, I gotta clean my car if I don't fucking want to.

• 54:32Speaker 05

  Yeah, New York you're fine.

• 54:33Speaker 02

  What?

• 54:34Speaker 05

  New York you're fine.

• 54:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 54:35H. Foley?

  Really?

• 54:35Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 54:36H. Foley?

  I don't know what I'm talking about.

• 54:37Speaker 02

  It tracks your trailers for sure.

• 54:39H. Foley?

  For sure.

• 54:40Speaker 02

  De-ice them things.

• 54:41H. Foley?

  They have those stations which are great. Those de-icing stations.

• 54:45Speaker 02

  I don't know if I've ever seen one.

• 54:46H. Foley?

  Yeah, maybe I'm thinking of something else.

• 54:48Speaker 02

  I think you're thinking of a de-icing station.

• 54:50H. Foley?

  Don't they have like where the waste station is that sprays something on top of the car? Maybe I'm thinking of airplanes.

• 54:55Speaker 02

  That's airplanes to spray. You ever sit there and get de-iced?

• 54:59H. Foley?

  Stinks.

• 54:59Speaker 02

  Hit you with the blue foam on the window?

• 55:01H. Foley?

  I don't like that.

• 55:02Speaker 02

  I don't trust that stuff.

• 55:03H. Foley?

  No. I don't like that at all. I think it's cool though when they have coal cars. For, um, when trains have coal cars, they have stations that squirt water in the coal cars. So they don't catch on fire. That's pretty cool.

• 55:17Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 55:18H. Foley?

  Not related to what we were talking about. Still an amusing anecdote.

• 55:22Speaker 02

  For all my train buffs out there. Figure it'd give you...

• 55:25H. Foley?

  It's Christmas season, I bet you some of the bozos and the homies got their train set up, their Lionel trains.

• 55:29Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 55:30H. Foley?

  I miss that.

• 55:32Speaker 02

  You know you can do it.

• 55:33H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 55:33Speaker 02

  Yeah, okay. Sure.

• 55:38H. Foley?

  Can't do it like my dad did it. My dad did it great.

• 55:41Speaker 02

  Okay, that's a record. What are we, forty eight?

• 55:45H. Foley?

  It's the holidays, asshole.

• 55:46Speaker 02

  Forty minutes before he comes in?

• 55:47H. Foley?

  What do you want from me? I said hi to him when I walked in.

• 55:51Speaker 02

  Who?

• 55:52H. Foley?

  My dad, the picture.

• 55:53Speaker 02

  You say hi to the picture?

• 55:54H. Foley?

  I, today I did. I saw him, I said, "Hey, Pop."

• 55:58Speaker 02

  I said hi to my stepdad today, or last night.

• 56:01H. Foley?

  Where?

• 56:02Speaker 02

  I got a picture in the house. And I was like doing something. I said, "Hey, Buck."

• 56:05H. Foley?

  See, there you go.

• 56:06Speaker 02

  And I went and took a deuce. That's what he would've wanted.

• 56:11H. Foley?

  Clean your ass.

• 56:12Speaker 02

  Uh...

• 56:13H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 56:14Speaker 02

  Alright, let's see here. Um, this one's from Sam J. "Two separate coworkers have recently told me how much their vehicles are worth in scrap metal."

• 56:25Speaker 02

  I used to do that too. I used to use that as my net worth with the loom.

• 56:28H. Foley?

  Why? Can you do that?

• 56:30Speaker 02

  What?

• 56:30H. Foley?

  Wait, you can like Google how much it would be?

• 56:32Speaker 02

  Well, it's per pound.

• 56:34H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 56:34Speaker 02

  Like, I'm sure you can find out. They like give you... They know, I'll just say, I don't even know what a car weighs, 2,000 pounds. But if it's a car, they know the seats and the tires and all that shit isn't... They know they can get like, it's like a couple hundred bucks probably.

• 56:49H. Foley?

  Couple hundred bucks?

• 56:50Speaker 02

  Six hundred bucks, maybe?

• 56:51H. Foley?

  Can't do that to a lease though, right?

• 56:52Speaker 02

  What?

• 56:53H. Foley?

  Frowned upon?

• 56:54Speaker 02

  Hey, I'm gonna need this back. What do you got, Lucas?

• 56:56Speaker 05

  The average scrap car price is between 200 and 700 dollars.

• 57:01H. Foley?

  That, it's like if the car's not working.

• 57:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, if it's not working, or like, if, you know, you have an old car that no one really...

• 57:07H. Foley?

  Take it to the junkyard.

• 57:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, you take it to the junkyard and they go, "Yeah, weigh it and we'll just give you like, fucking whatever." They're not like taking all of the metal and can probably just go, "Hey, for the car."

• 57:17H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 57:17Speaker 02

  We'll just wrap that. We'll give you 400 bucks for it.

• 57:20H. Foley?

  What, do they melt that down? Do they do that shit?

• 57:23Speaker 02

  They crush them and stuff.

• 57:23Speaker 05

  They cube them up.

• 57:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:24H. Foley?

  And then melt them down?

• 57:25Speaker 05

  I'm sure at some point.

• 57:27Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:27Speaker 05

  But also...

• 57:27Speaker 02

  What do they do after they crush a car? I just, I mean, they just sit in junkyards, I feel.

• 57:34H. Foley?

  They use that metal for something.

• 57:36Speaker 02

  I also know like you can wholesale a car. If you trade in a car that's like a piece of shit. They're like, oh, well wholesale, where I think they just lump it in with like 50 other cars. Like, you buy like, I'm buying 500 used cars or something like that.

• 57:48H. Foley?

  To scrapping.

• 57:49Speaker 02

  I don't know what. They send them overseas and shit like that.

• 57:51H. Foley?

  Yeah, probably.

• 57:52Speaker 05

  Yeah, there's separate processes to recycle it. So it's like you're crushing it, you're shredding it, you're separating it. You're doing like media separation and then recycling it.

• 58:00H. Foley?

  You ever see someone get caught in one of those crushers?

• 58:02Speaker 02

  Oh my, the teeth that come ashore.

• 58:04H. Foley?

  Oh, there's no way out. There's no way out. Those things scare the shit out of me.

• 58:13H. Foley?

  I saw some dude, they go in one.

• 58:18H. Foley?

  Ain't scrapping that. Bad news.

• 58:21Speaker 02

  One time I was working on a, when I worked at a chocolate factory, I was working on top of the tank. And it was open, it was hot. It has to be so hot to keep it liquid. And I remember I was on top of it, it was open, and I was like, you know, doing something. And the guy yelled up, he's like, be careful up there, someone fell in a Nestor or a Hershey or one. And like, it just, because it's like so hot that like your skin just starts falling, like it just burns off your skin. And I was like, dude, I am not, I'm making fucking $12 an hour under the table or some shit. Fuck this.

• 58:53H. Foley?

  Man, if I go with a chocolate.

• 58:54Speaker 02

  See you at Chickies and Pete's, dude.

• 58:57H. Foley?

  If I went Nevada chocolate, think about poetic justice, huh?

• 59:01Speaker 02

  No, it's the, you know, I mean, the thing you love most, it finally turns its back on you.

• 59:05H. Foley?

  You could eat them by a bunch of gummy sharks?

• 59:12Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, this one, great name. This one's from Ned Gaganski, long time, first time. Do you use Decorate for parties with balloons with no helium? That's a sad thing. I've done that. As like a cheap.

• 59:23H. Foley?

  Do they stay up? No, you gotta Scotch tape them to the walls.

• 59:26Speaker 02

  Scotch tape them to the wall.

• 59:27H. Foley?

  That's not that bad. You throw a couple helium ones in there too.

• 59:31Speaker 02

  It's not that good.

• 59:32H. Foley?

  But if you're doing a sign or a banner, and you want to tape a couple to the corners, I'm with that.

• 59:38Speaker 02

  I don't think it ever looks as good. It looks, it looks like you're coming home from jail. You know what I mean? It looks, it's not like a...

• 59:46H. Foley?

  Good luck, Randy.

• 59:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's like, it's a, it's not the best vibes.

• 59:51H. Foley?

  Have you ever been to a back from jail party?

• 59:54Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 59:54H. Foley?

  Really?

• 59:55Speaker 02

  Uh huh. I would call it a party, as part of, part of his probation, or parole was not.

• 1:00:02H. Foley?

  What do you asser- oh yeah, you can't associate.

• 1:00:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:00:05H. Foley?

  With known bozos.

• 1:00:06Speaker 02

  With known criminal underworld. Uh, yeah. It was a small, uh.

• 1:00:13H. Foley?

  Gathering?

• 1:00:14Speaker 02

  Small gathering the night he got out.

• 1:00:15H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 1:00:16Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 1:00:17H. Foley?

  What do you serve at something like that?

• 1:00:18Speaker 02

  I mean, I didn't serve anything. I think it was just food. I don't know.

• 1:00:21H. Foley?

  Hoagie tray.

• 1:00:23Speaker 02

  Maybe they were grilling, cause it wa- he got out in the summer.

• 1:00:26H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:00:27Speaker 02

  I remember he was jumping in and out of the pool like a Labrador. Like he was just like, he would jump in off the diving board, get out, run and jump, you know, like they just get in those loops. And I was just like, dude, relax, have a heater, what are you doing?

• 1:00:41H. Foley?

  Yeah, how long was he in there for?

• 1:00:42Speaker 02

  Uh, a little under four years.

• 1:00:44H. Foley?

  Ooh, you kidding me?

• 1:00:48H. Foley?

  That'd be funny.

• 1:00:48Speaker 02

  Shout out to you, big dog. He's doing great right now.

• 1:00:51H. Foley?

  That's what I like to hear.

• 1:00:54Speaker 02

  I know, he's doing great. I just bet them not too long ago.

• 1:00:57H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:00:57Speaker 02

  Um. This one's ju- this one's, this is from Tooties Tall Can. Ever do a shot of gin?

• 1:01:06H. Foley?

  He's drinking gin now.

• 1:01:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, but gin and tonics is different than a shot of gin. A shot of gin is like, you're about to get the electric chair or something. You're walk- you're walking to your demise.

• 1:01:15H. Foley?

  That's coming back now, though. Kids are, kids like gin.

• 1:01:18Speaker 02

  I told you that.

• 1:01:19H. Foley?

  I'm telling you.

• 1:01:20Speaker 02

  I told you that maybe three nights ago.

• 1:01:22H. Foley?

  I know what's going on.

• 1:01:23Speaker 02

  Uh huh. What else is going on?

• 1:01:25H. Foley?

  Sabrina Carpenter.

• 1:01:26Speaker 02

  Oh man, he won't stop talking about her.

• 1:01:29H. Foley?

  She's great.

• 1:01:29Speaker 02

  Gotta think for her, don't you?

• 1:01:30H. Foley?

  She's talented.

• 1:01:31Speaker 02

  Why don't you take a shot at her?

• 1:01:33H. Foley?

  Yeah, right. God, that's disgusting. She's a young girl. You're talking, I'm fucking married. Kidding me? I like her music.

• 1:01:40Speaker 02

  You're not married yet. Couple of days.

• 1:01:43H. Foley?

  Throw a haymaker?

• 1:01:46Speaker 02

  Pass for a number.

• 1:01:47H. Foley?

  She's cool. Um, I like that Timothy Chalamet. But you kinda wanna see that movie when it comes out. Bob Dylan movie.

• 1:01:55Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:01:56H. Foley?

  Looks alright.

• 1:01:57Speaker 02

  Told you he was in my neighborhood not too long ago.

• 1:01:58H. Foley?

  Is that right?

• 1:01:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, I told you they were shooting that movie. Some movie that takes place in the 50s maybe?

• 1:02:03H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:02:04Speaker 02

  Him and, uh...

• 1:02:05H. Foley?

  Tom Hardy.

• 1:02:06Speaker 02

  No, who's the...

• 1:02:06H. Foley?

  Barry Cohegan.

• 1:02:07Speaker 05

  That was a... Gwyneth Paltrow.

• 1:02:08Speaker 02

  Gwyneth Paltrow.

• 1:02:09H. Foley?

  Hmm, Gwyneth Paltrow's still banging, huh?

• 1:02:11Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. I don't know if they are, but, you know.

• 1:02:13H. Foley?

  No, I mean, she's still, she's still doing her thing. She was a big star in the 90s.

• 1:02:17Speaker 02

  90s? No.

• 1:02:18H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:19Speaker 02

  2000s.

• 1:02:20H. Foley?

  Nah.

• 1:02:21Speaker 02

  90s?

• 1:02:21H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:22Speaker 02

  What movie?

• 1:02:23H. Foley?

  Did a movie called Great Expectations with Ethan Hawke.

• 1:02:26Speaker 02

  What year was that?

• 1:02:27H. Foley?

  I don't know.

• 1:02:29H. Foley?

  2040?

• 1:02:30Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:02:31Speaker 05

  1970?

• 1:02:33Speaker 02

  Uh...

• 1:02:33Speaker 05

  1998.

• 1:02:34H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 1:02:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:36H. Foley?

  Apologize? Called me a liar?

• 1:02:39Speaker 02

  I don't think I called you a liar. I just questioned that I, most of...

• 1:02:43H. Foley?

  What was she in in the 2000s?

• 1:02:46Speaker 02

  The Iron Man's?

• 1:02:47H. Foley?

  I mean, come on, that's a, that's a comebacker. That's a, you know, that wasn't her heyday.

• 1:02:53Speaker 02

  I would say that, I'm, I'm, uh, listen, I don't have the facts, relax.

• 1:02:57H. Foley?

  Give me her videology, filmology.

• 1:02:59Speaker 02

  I don't know why you're...

• 1:03:01H. Foley?

  Go to IMBD.

• 1:03:02Speaker 02

  Give me her 23 and me. I don't know why you're taking like, you're like, personal friends with her and I'm shitting on her. I'm not. I just thought that it was more in the early...

• 1:03:09H. Foley?

  Working and eating shit together.

• 1:03:10Speaker 02

  Oh, God. You're intolerable. Sufferable.

• 1:03:14H. Foley?

  What do you got, Luke?

• 1:03:15Speaker 05

  The internet's so slow, I'm sorry.

• 1:03:16H. Foley?

  God damn it, Toody!

• 1:03:18Speaker 02

  Jesus Christ, Toody stinks.

• 1:03:19H. Foley?

  Bro's killing me. Goddamn holidays, can't we get on the internet?

• 1:03:24Speaker 05

  She was in Austin Powers.

• 1:03:27H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:03:28Speaker 05

  Uh, Royal Tenenbaums.

• 1:03:29H. Foley?

  Ooh. But that again, I would still, is a little bit after her heyday.

• 1:03:35Speaker 05

  But that was 2001, we're saying 199...

• 1:03:37Speaker 02

  No, late 90s into the 2000s, I would say, is her heyday.

• 1:03:39H. Foley?

  Alright, so what's late, what's, what's she doing in the late 90s?

• 1:03:41Speaker 02

  Great Expectations.

• 1:03:42H. Foley?

  Right.

• 1:03:43Speaker 05

  Talented Mr. Ripley.

• 1:03:44H. Foley?

  Ooh.

• 1:03:45Speaker 02

  When's that?

• 1:03:46Speaker 05

  Uh, that is 1999.

• 1:03:49Speaker 02

  99?

• 1:03:49H. Foley?

  Yeah, she had a run.

• 1:03:50Speaker 02

  Yeah, uh, Bounce, her and Affleck.

• 1:03:53H. Foley?

  I remember that.

• 1:03:54Speaker 02

  Shallow Hal, 2001, Royal Tenenbaums, 2001.

• 1:03:57H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:03:58Speaker 02

  Austin Powers, 2002.

• 1:04:00H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:04:01Speaker 02

  Uh, View...

• 1:04:01H. Foley?

  Working.

• 1:04:02Speaker 02

  View from the Top, I don't know what that is. Possession, 2002, 2003. Um, Proof, I don't know what that is.

• 1:04:10H. Foley?

  Oh, wait, was that the... Proof, is that the one with, um...

• 1:04:17H. Foley?

  Uh, what the fuck? Why am I drawing a blank? Gladiator, Russell Crowe. Where he goes and gets her, they end up falling in love.

• 1:04:25Speaker 02

  Uh, that does not, no, Jake Gyllenhaal.

• 1:04:27H. Foley?

  Jake Gyllenhaal?

• 1:04:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, late 90s into the 2000s for sure.

• 1:04:33H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:04:33Speaker 02

  I mean, mid 90s, Miss Parker, Flesh and Bone, Mal, these are all like fucking...

• 1:04:39Speaker 02

  All stuff you would do.

• 1:04:43H. Foley?

  If I had the body, sure.

• 1:04:46H. Foley?

  Alright.

• 1:04:46Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, let's see, we got time for one or two more here, um...

• 1:04:52Speaker 02

  This one's from David Savage, "Are you garbage if you used a beach chair inside next to a fireplace?" God damn, you are jammed up, dude.

• 1:04:59H. Foley?

  Chilling, dude.

• 1:04:59Speaker 02

  That's fucking cold chilling.

• 1:05:01H. Foley?

  I like it.

• 1:05:01Speaker 02

  I don't, that is a fun thing, it's got, if it's one of the lower ones.

• 1:05:05H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:06Speaker 02

  That's like, it's a little loungy, you're closer to the fireplace.

• 1:05:08H. Foley?

  You gotta be close to the fire to enjoy it.

• 1:05:11Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:05:12H. Foley?

  I like that.

• 1:05:12Speaker 02

  I'm with it.

• 1:05:13H. Foley?

  The couch and the, and the chair are always too far away. You set the place on fire. You know?

• 1:05:19Speaker 02

  Set the place on fire?

• 1:05:21H. Foley?

  If you had the couch too close to the fireplace.

• 1:05:23Speaker 02

  Okay, yeah, it'd also be a weird interior design to have the couch next to the fireplace.

• 1:05:29H. Foley?

  Boxing everybody else up.

• 1:05:30Speaker 02

  You know what's real, always real classy that blew my mind, and anytime I still see it now? The fireplace that you can see from two rooms.

• 1:05:38Speaker 02

  They would have it in like a rich guy's bedroom.

• 1:05:40H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:05:41Speaker 02

  You can like walk in and it's there, and then you can like walk around it.

• 1:05:44H. Foley?

  Yeah. Woo! That's alright.

• 1:05:46Speaker 02

  That's a little bit of cash here.

• 1:05:47H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:48Speaker 02

  Man.

• 1:05:49H. Foley?

  There's snow falling outside in a wooded area with that. You got, you got ceiling to floor windows. Mm-mm. We got the coal stove.

• 1:05:57Speaker 02

  Coal stove.

• 1:05:58H. Foley?

  Like looking into hell.

• 1:05:59Speaker 02

  We were burning.

• 1:05:59H. Foley?

  A little window.

• 1:06:00Speaker 02

  Straight door of flame logs. How you doing? Alright, we gotta wrap it up.

• 1:06:05H. Foley?

  Gang, we love you to death, happy holidays again.

• 1:06:08Speaker 02

  Yes!

• 1:06:09H. Foley?

  And we'll, uh, we'll see you next week.

• 1:06:11Speaker 02

  Peace!