Trashy Boardwalk Experience! w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Are You Garbage is back with Kevin Ryan and H. Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. It's a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! NEW AYG MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ AYG 2026 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows Watch Route 66: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSkJS1gCDR4 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored By: Rocket Money: Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at https://www. RocketMoney.com/GARBAGE Promo Code: GARBAGE BetterHelp: Sign up and get 10% off at https://betterhelp.com/garbage Promo Code: garbage DraftKings: https://dkng.co/ayg Promo Code: AYG Bet with DK Sportsbook: Gambling Problem? Call one eight hundred GAMBLER, one eight hundred MY RESET. Connecticut: call eight eight eight seven eight nine seven seven seven seven, visit CCPG dot org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. Twenty one plus. Void in Canada. Event contract trading with DraftKings Predictions involves risk of loss. Availability varies. Bet to get Bonus bets that expire in seven days. Trade to get fifty dollars in Predictions Dollars that expire in one year, issued every seven days via click to claim for twenty-one days. One non-withdrawable reward redeemable. Predictions offer void in New York. Ends July 19th. Terms at d k n g dot c o slash audio. Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00H. Foley?

  Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is All You Garbage.

• 0:06Speaker 01

  Oh yeah.

• 0:07H. Foley?

  It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that if they grew up to be classy.

• 0:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:12H. Foley?

  Or if they're just a big old piece of trash.

• 0:15Speaker 01

  Trash, trash, trash.

• 0:16H. Foley?

  That's right. I'm your host, H Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Toody's in a new addition. She just told me that if the new Spider-Man sucks, she's gonna kill herself. Is that crazy?

• 0:28Speaker 01

  Been hanging out with you a little too much.

• 0:30H. Foley?

  You got a lot riding on the film, which I hope it don't suck either. I like that Tom Holland. He's a good jet.

• 0:35Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 0:35H. Foley?

  Good Spider-Man.

• 0:36Speaker 01

  I like him.

• 0:37H. Foley?

  You don't?

• 0:38Speaker 01

  Nah.

• 0:38H. Foley?

  Are you a Jacob Malorti man?

• 0:40Speaker 01

  I don't know what that is either, but I, by the sounds of his foo-foo name.

• 0:43H. Foley?

  That kid stinks.

• 0:44Speaker 01

  No.

• 0:45H. Foley?

  Jacob Malorti? Whatever the fuck his name is. It's a lord. Pull it back. My cousin's coming at you from across the table. This is what we call the family episode. Just the boys, the bozos, and the homies. Just the way we like it.

• 0:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:57H. Foley?

  He is my best pal in the whole wide world. He is the denim king. He is the king of the boards, the king of the burbs, Kevin James Ryan.

• 1:05Speaker 01

  Oh, hello. It's a cool kid. What's up everybody? Shout out to you. Thanks for tuning in. As always, please make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube. Full video available over there on Spotify and the boys are climbing the frigging charts. And then obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com/areyougarbage. You go over there, you get all that bonus content, gang.

• 1:25H. Foley?

  Woo wee!

• 1:25Speaker 01

  And also don't forget, if you're in the Denver area, which I think it's just Denver, ain't much around there. All rocky.

• 1:32H. Foley?

  They got that shit at the airport.

• 1:33Speaker 01

  We're coming next week.

• 1:34H. Foley?

  The underground base. If you're in the underground base, come out and see the show.

• 1:36Speaker 01

  No, stay there. I don't need whatever you got going on that made you go underground.

• 1:40H. Foley?

  No, we want them to come see the show, because if they like us and the shit goes down, then we can do a couple of sets down there at the, underneath the airport.

• 1:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's, that's the next.

• 1:47H. Foley?

  For, for the mutant people.

• 1:49Speaker 01

  That's the next booking I want.

• 1:51H. Foley?

  I don't want to eat canned food. Fuck it, just take me out.

• 1:55Speaker 01

  I've been trying. Been spraying you with Raid every night.

• 1:59H. Foley?

  Should've killed me when you had the chance, baby. I'm the strongest I ever been.

• 2:05Speaker 01

  It's a little bumpy. Some would say, like the Rocky Mountains, where we'll be.

• 2:10H. Foley?

  Whoa, Denver, Denver in July? What are we gonna do? We can do a little fucking skiing in our jeans, shirts off? Like a Mountain Dew commercial?

• 2:17Speaker 01

  It's a very, uh, I think Denver in July is probably like, it's probably when they shine, you know what I mean? That outdoors.

• 2:23H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 2:23Speaker 01

  Lakes, rivers, mountains, caribou.

• 2:26H. Foley?

  Caribou?

• 2:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:27H. Foley?

  I mean, carabiner.

• 2:29Speaker 01

  No.

• 2:29H. Foley?

  The thing that you hook on your jeans and look cool.

• 2:31Speaker 01

  No, I mean, caribou.

• 2:31H. Foley?

  They have reindeer up there? No, the fuck they don't?

• 2:35Speaker 01

  Caribou's reindeer.

• 2:36H. Foley?

  Yes, it is.

• 2:37Speaker 01

  Is it? A reindeer's an actual reindeer.

• 2:39H. Foley?

  Are you talking about that big rat they have in Vietnam that they eat? A car or something?

• 2:44Speaker 01

  What?

• 2:44H. Foley?

  I don't know.

• 2:45Speaker 01

  Nutrient.

• 2:46H. Foley?

  No, nutrient.

• 2:47Speaker 01

  Nutria.

• 2:48H. Foley?

  Nutria. Rat.

• 2:51Speaker 01

  That's what you are.

• 2:52H. Foley?

  I ain't no rat, I'm a bug man.

• 2:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, right. A rat, whole family full of rats.

• 2:56H. Foley?

  Yeah, right. Patty is breaking my balls, though.

• 2:59Speaker 01

  About what?

• 3:00H. Foley?

  She wants me, I gotta clean out my drawers. In my room.

• 3:04Speaker 01

  What the fuck's going on in, in your whole universe?

• 3:08H. Foley?

  I gotta clean out my drawers.

• 3:09Speaker 01

  What's in your drawers?

• 3:10H. Foley?

  I got a bunch of clothes and stuff in my closet and in my drawers from like my dad and my uncles and all that stuff. She wants me to either get rid of it or donate it.

• 3:17Speaker 01

  So what are you gonna do?

• 3:18H. Foley?

  I don't know, I kinda fit into it now. I got that 90's style, bring it back. Start straight pimpin' at the Blue Bell Inn. Show up on the scene with a pair of khakis and a fucking Extra Starts Stripe Button Down Shirt. Dockers. Huh, maybe a little fucking penny loafers? Be pulling them off me.

• 3:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's good.

• 3:37H. Foley?

  You know what I'm saying?

• 3:37Speaker 01

  For sure.

• 3:38H. Foley?

  Gotta get it all.

• 3:39Speaker 01

  Are you doing that?

• 3:40H. Foley?

  No.

• 3:41Speaker 01

  Are you gonna go down and get it?

• 3:42H. Foley?

  No.

• 3:43Speaker 01

  You're gonna have her... It's gonna be, it's gonna be like when they go to fucking Marty's and he's gonna have to burn it, probably all his fleas. Or moths.

• 3:52Speaker 01

  Whole fucking inventory goes up.

• 3:56Speaker 01

  Take it down to Marty's.

• 3:57H. Foley?

  Take out a whole Salvation Army?

• 3:58Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 3:59H. Foley?

  Nah, I'll go through it. Jagga, yeah, you do it, you know what I mean? She busting my balls, she wants to get rid of this stuff. You getting a new bedroom suit, as I told you?

• 4:07Speaker 01

  It's not a suit, not a bedroom suit.

• 4:08H. Foley?

  Sweet.

• 4:09Speaker 01

  We went over that.

• 4:09H. Foley?

  Whatever.

• 4:10Speaker 01

  We're in fucking reruns today.

• 4:12H. Foley?

  No we're not. I think it's a little harsh. Just reminding you of a conversation we had 15 minutes ago.

• 4:18Speaker 01

  I think you took it a little too personal. That rerun struck a chord, and you know it.

• 4:25H. Foley?

  I got fresh material. I know a lot of people out there in Hollywood.

• 4:31Speaker 01

  Uh, I got fresh-

• 4:32H. Foley?

  Fuck!

• 4:33Speaker 01

  You stink.

• 4:37H. Foley?

  And we're back.

• 4:38Speaker 01

  I got fresh material for ya. I'm out there, boots on the ground. I, listen, as you know-

• 4:44H. Foley?

  King of the burbs.

• 4:45Speaker 01

  King of the birds, king of the boards, king of the, king of the kips. I'm, I'm, I'm doing it all, baby. But, we've talked a lot about Wildwood, New Jersey.

• 4:54H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 4:55Speaker 01

  Place I love. I, I, I, I've never really thought about it. I wanna be-

• 4:59H. Foley?

  Buried there.

• 5:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 5:01H. Foley?

  What?

• 5:01Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 5:02H. Foley?

  Where? Spread your ashes on the beach?

• 5:04Speaker 01

  No, I don't think I wanna be cremated. Bury me.

• 5:07H. Foley?

  Can't bury you on the beach.

• 5:08Speaker 01

  Why?

• 5:09H. Foley?

  We can, we-

• 5:09Speaker 01

  I'll come up.

• 5:10H. Foley?

  I can cremate ya.

• 5:11Speaker 01

  Not, you're, first of all, that would be, that'd be a crazy, universal thing. You outlive me and have to take care of me. My final wishes?

• 5:20H. Foley?

  Aw. That'd make me sad.

• 5:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, then you have a drawer full of my clothes, your mom'll be calling you. Hey, this, this is too much denim!

• 5:28H. Foley?

  Patty's outlived you too?

• 5:30Speaker 01

  Well, obviously if I go, I'm going soon, it's gonna be a tragic thing.

• 5:34H. Foley?

  Jesus Christ, man!

• 5:35Speaker 01

  What?

• 5:37H. Foley?

  Can't say that. Got money tied up in this thing. Give me the, give me the Instagram password, just in case. Um, the best I could do-

• 5:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's where we need you in those DMs.

• 5:48H. Foley?

  The best I could do is cremate you.

• 5:50Speaker 01

  Stiff armed it.

• 5:52Speaker 01

  Which I respect. I respect it. I respect it. Uh huh. Heisman!

• 6:00H. Foley?

  Best I could do for you is cremate you, and I could stick you into one of the, uh, the, the Parmesan shakers over at Sam's Pizza. So everybody down the shores-

• 6:08Speaker 01

  Gets a little bit of kippy.

• 6:09H. Foley?

  That's not bad.

• 6:10Speaker 01

  Hold on.

• 6:11H. Foley?

  What the fuck?

• 6:13Speaker 01

  You and, you and these mics.

• 6:15H. Foley?

  I don't, listen, I don't touch the fucking thing.

• 6:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, you're right. We come in at night and unscrew it.

• 6:21H. Foley?

  Why does, why is mine?

• 6:22Speaker 01

  That's what, that's what we got, that's what we got going on.

• 6:24H. Foley?

  Why does mine always get messed up?

• 6:26Speaker 01

  I don't know. I think it's a the arrow and not the Indian type thing. You know what I mean? The Indian and not the arrow.

• 6:32H. Foley?

  Who said that? Native American, but go ahead.

• 6:36H. Foley?

  Please.

• 6:37Speaker 01

  I respect, I respect the bus throw, my guy.

• 6:42H. Foley?

  Please, continue to make your off-color joke.

• 6:46H. Foley?

  For the fine and Native American people of this country.

• 6:48Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 6:49H. Foley?

  It's not the arrow, it's the Indian.

• 6:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 6:52H. Foley?

  I like that. I love shit like that these days.

• 6:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, why don't you start listening to it?

• 6:56H. Foley?

  I do.

• 6:56Speaker 01

  Alright. Okay.

• 6:59H. Foley?

  Have you ever, have you ever heard the one, if you go the thou, if you go a thousand miles into the darkness, it's not a thousand miles back, the light is always right there?

• 7:05Speaker 01

  You've told me that a thousand times.

• 7:10H. Foley?

  Hey, it's not the fork, it's the fat guy, huh? Nothing on that!

• 7:13Speaker 01

  Remember that, remember those bumper stickers?

• 7:17H. Foley?

  Be a little more specific.

• 7:18Speaker 01

  Guns kill people, like spoons made Rosie O'Donnell fat? That is a, that is a political state. If you used to drive around with that on the back of their, the 90s was crazy.

• 7:29H. Foley?

  Why does she take so much heat? Remember when she used to do that music show on VH1? It was, I watched it all the time.

• 7:35Speaker 01

  No.

• 7:35H. Foley?

  I used to watch it religiously.

• 7:36Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 7:37H. Foley?

  Can't remember, did she introduce videos or? Maybe it was the Rosie O'Donnell Show that was on?

• 7:41Speaker 01

  The Rosie O'Donnell Show, I liked, that was a daytime talk show, maybe 10 o'clock, it came on after Regis, I was a big fan.

• 7:46H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 7:47Speaker 01

  She came up with the term, I not came up with it, she really coined it, cutie patootie.

• 7:51H. Foley?

  Cutie patootie.

• 7:51Speaker 01

  He's a cutie patootie.

• 7:52H. Foley?

  She did do cutie patootie.

• 7:53Speaker 01

  I know.

• 7:54H. Foley?

  She was very good in A League of Their Own, too.

• 7:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:56H. Foley?

  Reminds me of like a Laverne and Shirley type vibe, her and Madonna.

• 8:00Speaker 01

  Sure, sure.

• 8:00H. Foley?

  That's what Madonna was at her, a Madonna is.

• 8:03Speaker 01

  That's a Goldman. Um, anywho, I was down the shore and we talk about it a lot, you know, obviously we have a very, you know, a worldwide program we have, obviously.

• 8:14H. Foley?

  Shout out to the homies and the bozos.

• 8:16Speaker 01

  Very popular. So not everybody might not be completely familiar with what Wildwood is, right?

• 8:22H. Foley?

  It's a southern tip, southern portion of the New Jersey coastline.

• 8:27Speaker 01

  It's the second to last town, yeah, it goes, uh, Wildwood, Cape May, it's one of the last free beaches in South Jersey, so it's not the best clientele.

• 8:35H. Foley?

  That Cape May's nice.

• 8:36Speaker 01

  I E my family, yes. Cape May's very nice.

• 8:38H. Foley?

  But you can't swim in a cape. That's how you get there, you don't get there.

• 8:42Speaker 01

  That's how they get ya.

• 8:43H. Foley?

  Yeah, you don't go out, that's where the sharks hang out, and that's where the rip, that's where the rip current gets ya.

• 8:47Speaker 01

  Gets ya a ripper.

• 8:48H. Foley?

  Oh, fuck that.

• 8:49Speaker 01

  Um, but, anywho, um, I was, uh, I was down there last week, uh, before the 4th of July. I was walking, did a lot of walking around, I, I took the baby, I was going on long walks on, on the boardwalk. During the day, take naps, the whole nine yards, the baby, not me.

• 9:04H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 9:04Speaker 01

  And, um, this is the best, so obviously there's a lot of t-shirt shops there.

• 9:10H. Foley?

  Yeah, that's right.

• 9:10Speaker 01

  Right?

• 9:12H. Foley?

  A lot of cheap t-shirts.

• 9:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, like, hey, you can go, you can get, you know, a picture, they'll put your, anything, kinda, you can make your own t-shirts.

• 9:20H. Foley?

  Not like the quality of comfort colors you can get at arugarbage.com.

• 9:23Speaker 01

  Which, shout out to everybody who bought the fucking 4th of July shirts.

• 9:26H. Foley?

  That's awesome.

• 9:27Speaker 01

  The not rubbish and the AYG ones, those are, I mean, those, those are low quantity at this point.

• 9:31H. Foley?

  Nice.

• 9:31Speaker 01

  Moving merch.

• 9:33H. Foley?

  I like it.

• 9:33Speaker 01

  Um, but, I, so I, I took a couple of pictures, this is, this is a family boardwalk we're on here. This is a, this is 10 o'clock in the morning, there's, this is what's on display.

• 9:45H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 9:46Speaker 01

  On the Wildwood boardwalk.

• 9:47H. Foley?

  About to show me some tittas?

• 9:49Speaker 01

  No.

• 9:49H. Foley?

  Oh. I don't know.

• 9:51Speaker 01

  This guy's obsessed with pussy, it's crazy.

• 9:53H. Foley?

  No, it's not, I'm a young guy, what are you talking about?

• 9:56Speaker 01

  You about to show me some tittas? Oh!

• 10:02Speaker 01

  Cause that'd be pretty cool if you did.

• 10:04H. Foley?

  We were doing a podcast yesterday, Kimmy pulled up a pair of knackers.

• 10:07Speaker 01

  Also, why would that be what I was about to show ya? Have you ever seen the show?

• 10:12H. Foley?

  I don't know what kinda freak shit you're up to.

• 10:15Speaker 01

  Um...

• 10:15H. Foley?

  I don't see you that much these days.

• 10:17Speaker 01

  Sure, okay. Um, alright, we can do, uh, this is, this is a...

• 10:21H. Foley?

  Hit me!

• 10:22Speaker 01

  This is, this is an easy one to start off. This is...

• 10:24H. Foley?

  Steve's bitch.

• 10:25Speaker 01

  This is a pair of, pair of booty shorts that say Steve's bitch.

• 10:30H. Foley?

  That's pretty awesome.

• 10:31Speaker 01

  That's not bad, right?

• 10:32H. Foley?

  No, that's great.

• 10:33Speaker 01

  You're like, that's on the edge, that's, you know, whatever, we're having a good time.

• 10:36H. Foley?

  Are they for girls or guys?

• 10:38Speaker 01

  I, you know, I, I assume they're made for girls.

• 10:40H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 10:41Speaker 01

  I think if a guy was walking up another boardwalk on these, I think they're, you know...

• 10:45H. Foley?

  I like that though, Steve's bitch. That's pretty good.

• 10:52Speaker 01

  You're a fucking weird guy. Uh, then there's this one, you know.

• 10:58Speaker 01

  It ain't gonna spank itself, written across the back of a pair of, uh...

• 11:02H. Foley?

  Machi, machi.

• 11:03Speaker 01

  Oh man, you're gonna be hard as a rock after the... You're gonna come in with wear and stuff.

• 11:10H. Foley?

  Yes, it isn't. I tell you that right now.

• 11:13Speaker 01

  Right? This is like... I don't know who's...

• 11:17H. Foley?

  Well, some probably good girls out there, huh?

• 11:19Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ, dude.

• 11:24Speaker 01

  You're like... You're like one, I think it's Nicolas Cage when...

• 11:28H. Foley?

  Look like the...

• 11:28Speaker 01

  In Face Off, when they switch-

• 11:30H. Foley?

  Face Off?

• 11:30Speaker 01

  And he's hitting on his daughter or something like that?

• 11:33H. Foley?

  What?

• 11:33Speaker 01

  That's you. Ahhh. "You like peaches?" And like, asking weird stuff like that.

• 11:37H. Foley?

  "You like peaches?"

• 11:40Speaker 01

  Using words-

• 11:40H. Foley?

  I'm doing it to get a rise out of you.

• 11:41Speaker 01

  Using words like succulent and stuff. You fucking creep.

• 11:47H. Foley?

  I remember the guy that used sexy to describe a showroom. It was a real sexy room.

• 11:51Speaker 01

  Do I remember him? Yeah, we trash him every day. Can't say his name publicly. Um... Okay.

• 12:02Speaker 01

  Now, I don't even remember all of the... This is an easy peasy one. Dunkin' Dee's nuts. In the style of Dunkin' Donuts. You know, that's a t-shirt you can wear to, I assume, a parolee or anything.

• 12:16H. Foley?

  That's just alright right there. Dunkin' Dee's nuts.

• 12:18Speaker 01

  Dunkin' Dee's nuts. It's a good time. That's fun. You know, that's something I, like, I would show my mom and she'd go, "Oh, you know, you're, you know..." "You're bad."

• 12:27H. Foley?

  That's disgusting.

• 12:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, "You're bad."

• 12:29H. Foley?

  "You're bad."

• 12:30Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 12:31H. Foley?

  Kevin's bad.

• 12:32Speaker 01

  Then this, I think this is, this is another three sets of the shorts. The shorts are poppy. They must move the units down there.

• 12:38H. Foley?

  Yeah, they moved. Those chicks like them shorts. Bite me, all you can eat, thick fillet.

• 12:42Speaker 01

  Thick fillet, in the Chick-fil-A.

• 12:44H. Foley?

  Whoa. Alright.

• 12:46Speaker 01

  I mean, if, I'll listen, I'm glad I don't have a daughter. Also. That's a tough... Have your daughter walking around Wildwood's Boardwalk wearing a fucking all-you-can-eat set of shorts? That's a, that's a wild... I know hookers that don't wear this kind of stuff.

• 13:03H. Foley?

  Would you allow your daughter to wear that?

• 13:04Speaker 01

  What? No, that's what I just said.

• 13:06H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 13:07Speaker 01

  Allow her? I mean, no.

• 13:11H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 13:11Speaker 01

  Would you allow your daughter to wear it?

• 13:13H. Foley?

  I don't have children.

• 13:14Speaker 01

  Okay, I don't have a daughter. I can use make believe and not make it sad.

• 13:19H. Foley?

  I didn't say it's sad.

• 13:21Speaker 01

  You didn't make it happy.

• 13:24Speaker 01

  I don't have children. You sound like you lost them in a fire or something like that. I don't have children. They're no longer with us.

• 13:30H. Foley?

  Hey, with that on the Titanic. I dressed up like a woman and got on a lifeboat.

• 13:35Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 13:37Speaker 01

  Um... What's this one? This is Tony's booty.

• 13:43H. Foley?

  That's alright.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  That's not bad. That's good. That's good clean fun.

• 13:46H. Foley?

  That's good clean fun. I mean, listen.

• 13:47Speaker 01

  I'm down there to have a good time at the end of the day.

• 13:49H. Foley?

  All of these are straight garbage.

• 13:53Speaker 01

  Oh, you think? I don't know if you can see back here, but there's a shirt with a weed leaf on it. A lot of marijuana.

• 13:59H. Foley?

  That shit was so scandalous in the 90s. I remember this year, this, we always thought this kid was a cop, foreign exchange student. I don't know where the fuck he was from.

• 14:08Speaker 01

  Had a mustache in 4th grade. Guy, what's going on here?

• 14:11H. Foley?

  Yeah, he might have been from Belgium, to be honest with you, which obviously recent beef, etc., etc.

• 14:17H. Foley?

  And he had a fucking chain that had a weed leaf on it. We all stayed clear of him. It took him a long time. He had to show up with bags upon bags upon bags for us to not think he was a cop.

• 14:28Speaker 01

  Making sure his money's like not marked in non-sequential and stuff like that. You're looking for like the mark on it?

• 14:34H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 14:35Speaker 01

  Um...

• 14:38H. Foley?

  Yeah. Foreign exchanges, foreign exchanges don't do as well as you would think with like the, you know, the ladies.

• 14:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's a tough... In your, in high school, you're not ready for like outsider.

• 14:51H. Foley?

  To use the accent.

• 14:52Speaker 01

  Not even that. No, I'm saying like...

• 14:56Speaker 01

  It's still a little too foreign. You're like, you know, that's like college. You're like finding, like in high school, you're still like, who's this fucking weird guy who, you know, that needs a little fucking right guard on him? You know what I mean?

• 15:09H. Foley?

  Woo wee!

• 15:11Speaker 01

  Cake putts, huh, dog?

• 15:13H. Foley?

  Is that the weed or your pits, dog?

• 15:15Speaker 01

  Um...

• 15:16H. Foley?

  What? You stink. What do you got?

• 15:19Speaker 01

  This one is, uh, this is my favorite.

• 15:26Speaker 01

  It says, "I love to finger paint." And then this says, "I'm paint." It's a double. You wear it as a couple.

• 15:36Speaker 01

  You get it?

• 15:37H. Foley?

  Yeah, I get it.

• 15:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 15:38H. Foley?

  That's a little offensive. For a Saturday afternoon down the shore, when I just got my core brother's frozen custard, and I'm walking down the boardwalk with my daughter. Okay?

• 15:48Speaker 01

  Well, that's like, you're gonna have to explain that. And listen, I don't know, I don't have, I don't, I mean, I have a kid. I don't have a kid that like, understands what's going on.

• 15:56H. Foley?

  Alright, let's say little Kipperino's like, "Daddy, what does that mean?"

• 15:58Speaker 01

  That's what I'm saying. I'd have to learn how to...

• 16:01H. Foley?

  Just be like, "He likes the finger paint." And his wife's a hooey.

• 16:07Speaker 01

  I don't know, I don't know, but don't shake his hand.

• 16:10H. Foley?

  His girlfriend's a skank, sweetie.

• 16:13Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah, I don't know, you know. I don't know, I have never had to cross any of those, uh, those bridges, but, uh...

• 16:21Speaker 01

  That's, you know.

• 16:22H. Foley?

  Come on, man.

• 16:24Speaker 01

  And then, this, there's this one, I believe this would be the last one.

• 16:29H. Foley?

  These are kitschy, though. They're, you know, fun. Not that last one.

• 16:35Speaker 01

  This one says, "Two-seater."

• 16:39Speaker 01

  It's an arrow pointing to the face, and you're Johnson.

• 16:49Speaker 01

  Right?

• 16:50H. Foley?

  My Johnson? What are you, a drill instructor from the 70's? Johnson?

• 16:55Speaker 01

  Oh my, but what do you call a schlong? What do you call it?

• 16:57H. Foley?

  My weener.

• 17:00Speaker 01

  What do you call it when you see it, huh?

• 17:02H. Foley?

  What do I call it? Huh?

• 17:04Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah.

• 17:05H. Foley?

  Call it to find out where the hell it is. Hello?

• 17:10Speaker 01

  Put an echo on that.

• 17:18H. Foley?

  A two-seater, god damn it. That's either... What's funny is more older people would be wearing those. That's like a guy who just got into like, the retirement community, two-seater.

• 17:31Speaker 01

  I gotta be honest with you, I don't think you're that far. If you keep making a couple of the decisions... I don't think, I don't, you're closer than I am.

• 17:39H. Foley?

  What?

• 17:39Speaker 01

  I think you're closer than...

• 17:40H. Foley?

  What? Cause I wanna get the tattoo? And my nose pierced?

• 17:44Speaker 01

  My Prince Albert?

• 17:46H. Foley?

  My scrotum ring?

• 17:49Speaker 01

  I'm just saying, if you like me, you and Luke up. A lot of these shirts would.

• 17:54H. Foley?

  I never wear anything like that. Cause I can't do two things at once. I'm a one woman guy.

• 18:00Speaker 01

  I got ADD.

• 18:02H. Foley?

  It was my train of thought. How am I gonna do that and watch Sopranos all at the same time?

• 18:06Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 18:07H. Foley?

  And eat a deli double from McDonald's.

• 18:09Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 18:10H. Foley?

  I don't eat those no more.

• 18:12H. Foley?

  But yet, I had one just last night.

• 18:14Speaker 01

  Um, and then there's one more. Let me just find where it is.

• 18:18H. Foley?

  Your computer stinks.

• 18:19Speaker 01

  I unplugged it, so you didn't see it asshole.

• 18:24Speaker 02

  What you said asshole?

• 18:26Speaker 01

  Asshole. Alright, here then there's, you know, those were all, you know. They got a little more risque as we went along. Obviously.

• 18:37H. Foley?

  Obviously.

• 18:38Speaker 01

  Thick filet is alright, you know. Um.

• 18:44H. Foley?

  Sorry to crush a cough drop real quick.

• 18:45Speaker 01

  It's okay.

• 18:46H. Foley?

  I've had a tickle in the back of my throat for about three weeks.

• 18:49Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 18:50H. Foley?

  Comes and.

• 18:50Speaker 01

  Piece of semen or something?

• 18:53H. Foley?

  Well, that's what the guy's.

• 18:54Speaker 01

  Get the shirt made.

• 18:59H. Foley?

  I've had a tickle in the back of my throat, so feel free to come in my mouth.

• 19:02Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ.

• 19:06Speaker 01

  Again, AYG after dark over here.

• 19:09H. Foley?

  That's a.

• 19:10Speaker 01

  My boy Deli, I used to have one that said, "The man and then the legend." A dude in like, 8th grade. I didn't have pubes yet. I was like, this guy's fucking, the hell's he got going on?

• 19:21H. Foley?

  Deli got a piece on him?

• 19:23Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah, I mean, this is, Deli said, I mean. He's doing, yeah, he's doing well. I haven't seen it in a while, but.

• 19:31H. Foley?

  A legend.

• 19:33Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah.

• 19:35H. Foley?

  My guy's the fairy tale. Right? No. I don't know.

• 19:39Speaker 01

  There's a.

• 19:40H. Foley?

  Over exaggerated story.

• 19:42Speaker 01

  What?

• 19:42H. Foley?

  Yeah, small winner.

• 19:44Speaker 02

  More of a vignette.

• 19:46H. Foley?

  Ah, novella if you will, yes.

• 19:50H. Foley?

  Haven't been yet. More of a haiku, to be honest with you. What? Remember how everybody thought they were cool when they could do a haiku real quick?

• 19:59Speaker 01

  No. What kind of fucking bozos are you rolling with?

• 20:03H. Foley?

  You don't remember that? People would always do them.

• 20:06Speaker 01

  Who?

• 20:06H. Foley?

  I don't know.

• 20:07Speaker 01

  I'm asking. You said people always, I, no.

• 20:10H. Foley?

  It's like people do it as a face throw.

• 20:12Speaker 01

  I just mentioned that my friend has a shirt that says "The Man and the Legend", and you think that guy knows what a haiku is?

• 20:19H. Foley?

  I don't, I don't really know what one is either.

• 20:20Speaker 01

  Hit you with a karate chop.

• 20:23H. Foley?

  What's a haiku, Luke? It's like four things or something?

• 20:25Speaker 02

  I think it's like five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables. It's like some-

• 20:29H. Foley?

  That's the dumbest shit I ever heard.

• 20:31Speaker 01

  You don't, you've never tried?

• 20:33H. Foley?

  No. Five syllables? I don't, what's five syllables?

• 20:37Speaker 01

  I don't even, you just rip one out real quick. I don't even know where I could, how would I come up?

• 20:41H. Foley?

  How all occasions do and fall against me.

• 20:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's a, it's a five, seven, five pattern with syllables.

• 20:48H. Foley?

  Five, seven, five. I'm more of a five, five, five man, if you know what I mean.

• 20:52Speaker 01

  Hate that.

• 20:52H. Foley?

  Domino's. Kim, what do you know about that Rocket Money?

• 20:55Speaker 01

  Big Rocket Money guy over here.

• 20:58H. Foley?

  Big fans of Rocket Money over here. You know, you know, a lot of people don't really give Rocket Money credit for? Being a time saver.

• 21:04Speaker 01

  Woo, you ain't lying.

• 21:05H. Foley?

  Get rid of all those subscriptions that you don't want. You make sure everything's organized, neat, clean, organized. It saves you so much time.

• 21:12Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 21:12H. Foley?

  I remember I used to watch my mom on a Sunday just drive herself crazy. Bang an hour after hour. Get a little Rocket Money in your life, you know what I mean? Takes care of things the easy way.

• 21:22Speaker 01

  Yes. One of my favorite things about Rocket Money is, I've said it before, but you, listen, this is what it does. You put your, you, you, you, you link all of, I linked to my, all of my accounts. I got my savings account, I got my checking account, I got my credit card. That way it knows everything and you get it all in one place. I don't have to go, oh, I gotta log into my credit card, WhatsApp, this, that, all of that. Cause I'll forget and then the next thing you know, I get a wallet with some charges. It was mine, it wasn't mine. You lose track of your subscriptions, which I've done time and time again.

• 21:50H. Foley?

  I had a Dairy Queen charge on my card the other day.

• 21:53Speaker 01

  Uh-huh.

• 21:53H. Foley?

  I wasn't at Dairy Queen. I swear to God, I was not at Dairy Queen.

• 21:58Speaker 01

  Hey.

• 21:59H. Foley?

  Come in here and say that shit.

• 22:00Speaker 01

  Tell it to the, tell it to the judge.

• 22:02H. Foley?

  I gotta talk to Rocket Money about it.

• 22:04Speaker 01

  Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join rocketmoney.com/garbage. That's rocketmoney.com/garbage. One more time, rocketmoney.com/garbage.

• 22:20H. Foley?

  Do it. Gavin's talking about DraftKings.

• 22:22Speaker 01

  DraftKings.

• 22:23H. Foley?

  Gang, you know Fight Night is here and DraftKings has you fully covered. The DraftKings Sports App is now available in all 50 states and that includes all markets. You're in on the excitement? Get in on the excitement at the speed of sports, baby.

• 22:38Speaker 01

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• 23:23Speaker 01

  Availability varies. Bet to get bonus bets that expire in seven days. Trade to get $50 in prediction dollars that expire in one year. Issued every seven days via click to claim for 21 days. One non-withdrawable reward redeemable. Predictions offer void in New York, end July 19. Terms at dkng.co/audio.

• 23:48H. Foley?

  Nail it. Hit me with the, what's it called? Finale.

• 23:55Speaker 01

  Crescendo.

• 23:55H. Foley?

  No, crescendo is when it slows down. Then the finale. First the crescendo, then your finale.

• 24:02Speaker 01

  Finale, then your crescendo.

• 24:04H. Foley?

  No.

• 24:04Speaker 01

  You charge a crescendo. You run from the finale.

• 24:08H. Foley?

  I was watching Stand Up Guys the other night with Al Pacino.

• 24:12Speaker 01

  You are my dad. It's cra- you're my dad after the second.

• 24:15H. Foley?

  I got, I only got Tubi, so I watch what Tubi's got.

• 24:17Speaker 01

  Watching a bunch of like, late year fucking Sylvester Stallone vehicles.

• 24:27H. Foley?

  I was about to start Lansky the other day.

• 24:29Speaker 01

  Trying to have like a, you're gonna be showing up in like a weird blue suit, a little too shiny.

• 24:36H. Foley?

  I was gonna watch Lansky with Harvey Keitel the other day, I was getting a chance. Busy.

• 24:42Speaker 01

  I love it. We've reached the point where you're telling me what movies you were gonna watch? Oh, no, really? That's cool, dude.

• 24:49H. Foley?

  What are you talking about?

• 24:50Speaker 01

  I can write a IQ.

• 24:51H. Foley?

  Show me a picture.

• 24:54Speaker 01

  Not with that attitude.

• 24:55H. Foley?

  Better be some boobs.

• 24:58Speaker 01

  This one might fucking have you slipping out of your seat.

• 25:00H. Foley?

  Uh oh.

• 25:02Speaker 01

  Eat healthy.

• 25:03H. Foley?

  Oh my god.

• 25:04Speaker 01

  With stick figures of a man and a lady.

• 25:08H. Foley?

  He's eating that girl's vagina.

• 25:12Speaker 01

  How crazy is that? That's at, I'm all, I'm standing on the boardwalk, that's at the, that's the, that's to get you inside.

• 25:19H. Foley?

  That's crazy.

• 25:20Speaker 01

  That's wild, right?

• 25:21H. Foley?

  What the hell? That's awful.

• 25:24Speaker 01

  Now, give me the location of this, that store. Also, the lady didn't like that I was taking pictures of her merchandise.

• 25:31H. Foley?

  Yeah, what'd she say?

• 25:32Speaker 01

  Not that she gave me the stank eye, though.

• 25:35H. Foley?

  Pictures ain't free. You gotta buy it. Probably thinks you're going home to jerk off on a fucking older bald man, wearing denim on a boardwalk. Are you dressed like that? You probably have jeans on, don't you? You walk up and down the boardwalk in jeans?

• 25:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, I walk up and down the boardwalk with jeans.

• 25:51H. Foley?

  You really? I bet you do. Taking pictures of fucking risque t-shirts and going home to fucking pleasure yourself in your mother's bathroom. That's disgusting.

• 26:02Speaker 01

  What?

• 26:02H. Foley?

  Yeah. Think about that. It's fucked up.

• 26:09Speaker 01

  Just pull out a gun and just blow you away.

• 26:17H. Foley?

  Now that's comedy.

• 26:21H. Foley?

  Fucking murder suicide.

• 26:23Speaker 01

  Luke, cut it.

• 26:26Speaker 01

  That's our last word.

• 26:27H. Foley?

  Travis, hit me.

• 26:30Speaker 01

  Uh, we're having a good time. Um, this might not play. This probably won't play, but we're gonna take a, we're gonna take a shot at it.

• 26:42H. Foley?

  The phone of a murder-suicide, man.

• 26:43Speaker 01

  Uh, it's killed, by the way.

• 26:46H. Foley?

  It gotta come heavy. What do you got?

• 26:49Speaker 01

  I think it would be this.

• 26:53Speaker 01

  There was, they do breakfast on the, some restaurant, I got your attention now, not so stupid, is it?

• 26:59H. Foley?

  No, what you got, breakfast?

• 27:00Speaker 01

  Um, they play, uh, so like, there's some restaurants, they're like pizza places, right? But they do breakfast in the morning.

• 27:09H. Foley?

  I know, that's always on a paper plate or something, they, it's not great.

• 27:14Speaker 01

  I-

• 27:14H. Foley?

  Down the shore.

• 27:15Speaker 01

  There's this place Hotch, Hot Spot, there's like three or four of them, they do, they, they almost had me. It was just too hot for Lil Kipperino to not, to post up, dude, this place was wide open, on the beach.

• 27:28H. Foley?

  On the beach?

• 27:29Speaker 01

  Been there since like nineteen, like on the pier, on the beach side of the pier.

• 27:33H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 27:34Speaker 01

  And it just, it's like $4.99 for like the fucking all American, all American fucking-

• 27:40H. Foley?

  The Scrapple, Grapple, yeah, I'm with you.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  I recall that, they, they, so like, it's also like a lot of like carnival barking, like, step right up, step right in, and they, this place was advertising their breakfast.

• 27:51H. Foley?

  See the man in a denim shirt taking pictures, weird t-shirt.

• 27:56Speaker 01

  The baby's all in denim? I got a denim stroller.

• 28:06Speaker 01

  But, they, my favorite thing is the, they, they, this place had a recording. There wasn't one person in this fucking restaurant.

• 28:14H. Foley?

  Oh, man.

• 28:15Speaker 01

  And the recording was a guy, from Philly, like he's, it's, he's the, it was the proprietor, going over what they have for breakfast, and I gotta, I thought of you immediately, I said the bug man would be all, we would, if we were walking, we'd stop and go-

• 28:31H. Foley?

  The place is empty.

• 28:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 28:32H. Foley?

  Is this just on a re-

• 28:33Speaker 01

  It's early, though, yeah, it's just on repeat.

• 28:35H. Foley?

  So, if I'm sitting down to eat, I hear this guy's voice, like I'm in a fucking-

• 28:38Speaker 01

  That's on the outside.

• 28:39H. Foley?

  Camp?

• 28:39Speaker 01

  I don't think you'd hear it inside.

• 28:40H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 28:46Speaker 03

  Going on right here.

• 28:49Speaker 03

  We got bacon and eggs, ham and eggs, sausage and eggs, and delicious Taylor pork roll. Right over here. Come on in.

• 29:00Speaker 03

  Freshly squeezed orange juice today.

• 29:04Speaker 03

  Sausage and eggs, bacon and eggs, ham and eggs, right here. Breakfast specials are going on right now.

• 29:10Speaker 01

  Going on.

• 29:12Speaker 03

  Come on over and try some delicious Taylor pork roll. That's right. We have Taylor pork roll here today, the original. Taylor pork rolls, box.

• 29:22Speaker 01

  You hear that, you little shits? We got the real stuff.

• 29:24Speaker 03

  We had today, we had two eggs, sausage, hash brown.

• 29:28H. Foley?

  What the fuck with the sausage and the bacon? And pancakes, french toast? This guy just keeps saying the same thing over again.

• 29:35Speaker 01

  He's got me, d- listen.

• 29:36H. Foley?

  Delicious sausage, ham?

• 29:38Speaker 01

  Step right up, step right, dude.

• 29:40H. Foley?

  Eggs and bacon.

• 29:41Speaker 01

  You could hear him like, mis- not mispronounced, but like, stutter on, you know what I mean?

• 29:45H. Foley?

  He's probably in the office doing that.

• 29:46Speaker 01

  For one take.

• 29:47H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 29:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was alright.

• 29:49H. Foley?

  The original. Now, he was kinda saying they were like the first place to have Taylor ham.

• 29:54Speaker 01

  Mm-mm. He has the, the original pork roll is Taylor pork roll.

• 29:59H. Foley?

  Yes.

• 29:59Speaker 01

  And we have the original pork roll, not this fucking Deets and Watson trash they're throwing around.

• 30:05H. Foley?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 30:06Speaker 01

  Cumberland Farms. Talking real shit here, guy.

• 30:10H. Foley?

  Deets and Watson's alright. Deets and Watson's for the working man. You know? Not all boar's head.

• 30:17Speaker 01

  Who does boar's head?

• 30:18H. Foley?

  People do, what?

• 30:19Speaker 01

  I've said that weird, didn't I? Who does boar's?

• 30:23H. Foley?

  Sounds like you're sucking a pig's dick.

• 30:25Speaker 01

  What? That's, I was on my, one of my-

• 30:27H. Foley?

  Cut that. This is ridiculous.

• 30:30Speaker 01

  One of my favorite battle rap, I think it was Arone, shout out to Arone.

• 30:33H. Foley?

  Of course.

• 30:33Speaker 01

  One of his old, original battle raps. I don't think it was him. It was a guy he was going against, Prophet, with a P.

• 30:40H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 30:41Speaker 01

  Get it? Like, with a P-H, I mean.

• 30:43H. Foley?

  Ron and I agreed on trashing somebody not too recently.

• 30:46Speaker 01

  Very nice.

• 30:46H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 30:47Speaker 01

  Was it me?

• 30:47H. Foley?

  No. I don't wanna say who it was. Keep hard.

• 30:51Speaker 01

  Your raps are like cold cuts.

• 30:54H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 30:54Speaker 01

  It boar's heads.

• 30:56H. Foley?

  Oooh.

• 30:58Speaker 01

  Come on, dog!

• 30:59H. Foley?

  Is that a double entendre?

• 31:00Speaker 01

  Uh, yes, that's exactly what a double entendre is.

• 31:03H. Foley?

  They're big in the rap game, apparently.

• 31:06Speaker 01

  Thought it was a Mexican dish. I'll do the double entendre. With mole sauce?

• 31:12H. Foley?

  I like that mole sauce.

• 31:14Speaker 01

  Ah, me too.

• 31:15H. Foley?

  I didn't.

• 31:16Speaker 02

  Holy shit, that rap battle has a genius lyric breakdown.

• 31:21Speaker 01

  What did you say? I don't know what that is.

• 31:22Speaker 02

  You know like genius, like they break down the lyrics?

• 31:24Speaker 01

  Mm-mm.

• 31:25Speaker 02

  It's just like very like in-depth.

• 31:26H. Foley?

  What the fuck are you talking about?

• 31:27Speaker 02

  Line for line, they have like all the different meanings and where it connects to.

• 31:30H. Foley?

  Oh shit.

• 31:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:32Speaker 01

  Is that the line? It's something like that.

• 31:34H. Foley?

  Send me the link.

• 31:35Speaker 01

  It boos heads.

• 31:36H. Foley?

  Send me the link, email it to me. Snapchat.

• 31:41H. Foley?

  You know Snapchat's still banging?

• 31:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, we're on Snapchat.

• 31:44H. Foley?

  We are?

• 31:44Speaker 01

  Uh-huh.

• 31:45H. Foley?

  No, we're not.

• 31:45Speaker 01

  Yes, we are.

• 31:46H. Foley?

  What are we doing up there? We're on second, I don't have a thing.

• 31:50Speaker 01

  What do you mean?

• 31:50H. Foley?

  I could do the little filters, the face, a little chubby face.

• 31:54Speaker 01

  You need a filter to do a chubby face?

• 31:56H. Foley?

  I don't see what you did there. That was not a double entendre. Wait, we're on Snapchat?

• 32:00Speaker 01

  That is a double chin.

• 32:01H. Foley?

  We're on Snapchat?

• 32:02Speaker 01

  Come on, what? That's fucking in there. That's in there, guy.

• 32:07H. Foley?

  Take it easy, Marshall Matters.

• 32:11H. Foley?

  Marshall Smathers.

• 32:15H. Foley?

  Marshall Scrapple.

• 32:16Speaker 01

  What was that with the Smothers Brothers? I don't know. I thought that was like a jelly company, no?

• 32:19H. Foley?

  No, they were two guys. They were a comedy team. Smothers Brothers. Dick and somebody else.

• 32:25Speaker 01

  Fat ass.

• 32:26H. Foley?

  Not a one guy was in Casino. He played the...

• 32:29Speaker 01

  Rickles.

• 32:30H. Foley?

  No. One of the Smothers Brothers was the, um... The state assemblyman that wouldn't... Was I at that dinner? Was I at that dinner? He's the one that bangs the blonde hooker in the room upstairs and takes the, um...

• 32:45Speaker 01

  I got it.

• 32:46H. Foley?

  The chips out of the drawer. Remember that?

• 32:50H. Foley?

  Chick was hot.

• 32:53Speaker 01

  I wonder if that was all you could eat? Listen, you gotta get your mind out of the gutter here, guys.

• 32:59H. Foley?

  My mind's out of the goddamn gutter. The comedy goddamn podcast, we're doing a job here, we're doing a show. We're broadcasting.

• 33:05Speaker 01

  Got a Gosh darn Family episode on our hands.

• 33:07H. Foley?

  And now for more, Kevin Ryan.

• 33:11Speaker 01

  That's original Taylor ham.

• 33:15H. Foley?

  You got eggs and bacon, eggs and sausage, eggs and ham, eggs and Taylor ham. We also have eggs and bacon. Eggs and sausage.

• 33:24Speaker 01

  Your mic's off again.

• 33:25H. Foley?

  It's, it's, it, listen.

• 33:32Speaker 01

  We're gonna glue, can we weld Diesel?

• 33:34H. Foley?

  You say hi, you don't say hi to everybody? Oh, you're on camera.

• 33:38Speaker 01

  Have you ever seen the show? Diesel, you gotta tack weld his fucking, his mic so he can't break it. Solder it or something.

• 33:45H. Foley?

  You gotta use, uh, uh, that tape.

• 33:47Speaker 01

  So his mouth shut too. That won't stop breaking my cojones.

• 33:54H. Foley?

  It's just, it's just Chinese stuff you're buying. American.

• 34:01Speaker 01

  You done?

• 34:02H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 34:07Speaker 01

  The fuck, someone just came-

• 34:08H. Foley?

  What the fuck is that?

• 34:10Speaker 01

  Someone just rolled in. He said he's with the garbage company. He might think we're also a garbage company.

• 34:18Speaker 01

  See, you guys also do trash. Are yous connected or no? Coming a couple of fucking wise guys.

• 34:27Speaker 01

  You're on their side because you want to be a mobster.

• 34:35H. Foley?

  Oh, hey. Hey, Gabagoo.

• 34:41H. Foley?

  I had dinner at that John's on 12th Street. Couple of weeks ago.

• 34:45Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 34:45H. Foley?

  Delicious. You want an old school joint? It's John's of 12th Street. I thought it was John's on 12th Street. John's of 12th Street. That in East Village.

• 34:55Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm. You're Henry of Hell's Kitchen.

• 34:57H. Foley?

  I am, motherfucker.

• 34:59Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 35:00H. Foley?

  I live in the kitchen. Which I got a new series coming out about the kitchen, about the Westies. So I gotta get my apartment before the fucking prices start skyrocketing. It's on MGM. Think I'm safe.

• 35:12Speaker 01

  Um, guys, as you know, we got a Gashon Family episode on our hands. When you sign up for the old Patreon, we will answer your garbage question on the air.

• 35:18H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 35:19Speaker 01

  Uh, let's see here. This is a home run. This was one, this one's from Brooks. You's ever rip a sandwich in half instead of cutting it? I did that down the shore. If you go to Wildwood, you go to Russo's over there on 9th Street. They don't cut their sandwiches. I think you gotta ask-

• 35:36H. Foley?

  That's kind of infuriating.

• 35:38Speaker 01

  Kind of. Imagine, it's a hot, imagine ripping a hot cheesesteak in half. You know, I ain't got time to go look for a knife. I, I, I was on a beach.

• 35:46H. Foley?

  You eating a cheesesteak on the beach?

• 35:48Speaker 01

  I ate a cheesesteak on the beach.

• 35:49H. Foley?

  How do you do that?

• 35:51Speaker 01

  You rip it in half and eat it.

• 35:52H. Foley?

  I can't really eat on the beach. I don't know why. I can eat on a boat. I can eat everywhere. The beach, I feel like sand gets everywhere. I don't like it. I guess if I had to, I could.

• 36:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think, I think you could manage.

• 36:06H. Foley?

  But I don't like-

• 36:06Speaker 01

  If I was sitting there with a Russo's cheesesteak, and you're hungry, you hadn't eaten in 10 hours?

• 36:11H. Foley?

  If you ripped it in half.

• 36:12Speaker 01

  I ripped it in half and I said, "Oh, I don't want to wrap this back into my paper blew away and say now the only way to do is eat it." You could, you could, you couldn't eat it? You're gonna eat it.

• 36:21H. Foley?

  Yeah, I could eat it.

• 36:22Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 36:23H. Foley?

  I need a lot of cheese on it though, because I wouldn't be able to put ketchup and stuff on it.

• 36:26Speaker 01

  Oh, then we're out, yeah.

• 36:29H. Foley?

  I can't add condiments to it on the beach. I'll get sandy. Is that sand just in the air?

• 36:34Speaker 01

  I didn't have condiments on me. I didn't bring a, I didn't bring a college boy fridge.

• 36:38H. Foley?

  You didn't have salt, pepper, ketchup?

• 36:40Speaker 01

  No.

• 36:40H. Foley?

  How you gonna make any money on the beach then? You got no condiments. Huh? What, you just eat it, you just raw dogged it? Just cheese?

• 36:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, a cheese, that's how I do my cheesesteak.

• 36:50H. Foley?

  You don't eat cheesesteaks with ketchup?

• 36:52Speaker 01

  No.

• 36:52H. Foley?

  You don't put mayo on them?

• 36:54Speaker 01

  No.

• 36:54H. Foley?

  Oregano? Lettuce, tomato, onion, hoagie, fire?

• 36:58Speaker 01

  No, I'd be a cheesesteak hoagie then. I would've said, if I meant cheesesteak hoagie, I would've said cheesesteak hoagie.

• 37:02H. Foley?

  I used to love them when I was a kid. Not really so much anymore. Cheesesteak hoagies.

• 37:06Speaker 01

  Try one on the beach.

• 37:08H. Foley?

  Chicken cheesesteak hoagie. Mayo, oregano, white onion, raw onion.

• 37:16H. Foley?

  It's nice. Um, I prefer when they cut them into quarters, to be honest with you.

• 37:21Speaker 01

  Whoa, don't like the double end. I don't, I don't like a, that's why I don't like a hoagie trays.

• 37:29H. Foley?

  Really?

• 37:30Speaker 01

  I don't like-

• 37:31H. Foley?

  Well, hold on, most hoagie trays, they don't give you the end.

• 37:34Speaker 01

  No, I'm saying I don't like a double cut. I like an end. I need, I need a heel.

• 37:39H. Foley?

  Really?

• 37:39Speaker 01

  I need an anchor.

• 37:40H. Foley?

  That's crazy.

• 37:42Speaker 01

  No. What? It's the bottom. It's the, it's, it's the-

• 37:46H. Foley?

  But on a hoagie tray, there is no bottom. Just goes around in a circle.

• 37:50Speaker 01

  I know, but then it fall, I, I know, I get that, but I'm saying the bottom of the sandwich, there's nothing to contain. It pushes, it falls, you get a tomato hanging out.

• 37:58H. Foley?

  No.

• 37:59Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 38:00H. Foley?

  Not on the hoagie tray, because it's bite sized.

• 38:04H. Foley?

  Don't you get that?

• 38:06Speaker 01

  They're not bite sized.

• 38:07H. Foley?

  Yeah, they are.

• 38:09Speaker 01

  They're at least four, three to four inches.

• 38:10H. Foley?

  I've never had a hoagie tray where I bit down and the meat slid out.

• 38:14Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 38:15H. Foley?

  Couple places out in Queens where that happens a lot. I'm not gonna say any names, but...

• 38:21Speaker 01

  Okay, well, I like, I like a heel. For whatever reason, you may or may not see an issue.

• 38:27H. Foley?

  You're like, "Yeah, I..."

• 38:27Speaker 01

  I like a heel.

• 38:28H. Foley?

  I respect that.

• 38:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:29H. Foley?

  But they don't have them in hoagie trays.

• 38:32Speaker 01

  This wasn't, that, that we, you're, you're stuck on hoagie trays. I said, you said you like when they cut a sandwich into quarters.

• 38:38H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 38:39Speaker 01

  I said, "I don't like that because then there's two pieces that don't have heels. I'd rather a longer..."

• 38:43H. Foley?

  Those that don't have heels.

• 38:44Speaker 01

  I'd rather the longer heels.

• 38:46H. Foley?

  Gotcha. I understand.

• 38:47Speaker 01

  What I like.

• 38:48H. Foley?

  I understand. I ripped a Whopper in half one time.

• 38:52H. Foley?

  To share it with somebody. Didn't really pull right.

• 38:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, no shit.

• 38:55H. Foley?

  Yeah, I gotta be honest with you, man. Burger King, they're like fucking, really fucking up. You bite...

• 39:05Speaker 01

  Apologies.

• 39:06H. Foley?

  Who was that?

• 39:07Speaker 01

  It's an alarm for a call.

• 39:09H. Foley?

  You got a call?

• 39:10Speaker 01

  I pushed it.

• 39:11H. Foley?

  Ooh, nice. Is that the eye doctor?

• 39:13Speaker 01

  No.

• 39:14H. Foley?

  You have another call?

• 39:15Speaker 01

  It's actually the Snapchat, with the Snapchat guys.

• 39:17H. Foley?

  Nice, we have Snapchat guys?

• 39:20Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 39:21H. Foley?

  Pretty cool.

• 39:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:23H. Foley?

  Why don't you get an AYG filter on there? Venom dork, man. Mr. International Business Man.

• 39:30Speaker 01

  What's it do? Just make the guy 400 pounds? What's it do?

• 39:34Speaker 01

  A bad hang? What's it do?

• 39:36H. Foley?

  Makes the guy real thick head?

• 39:39H. Foley?

  Um, you take a bite out of a fucking, any sandwich from Burger King, all the stuff comes right out of it. It, it, you, you, you get it all in one bite. It's like a, like a, like hooking a dolphin on a net. Everything comes with it.

• 39:57Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 39:57H. Foley?

  In the one bite. The pickle pulls, the tomato, it's bad.

• 40:02H. Foley?

  And they're trying all this shit with the fucking jalapeno Whopper and...

• 40:05Speaker 01

  A jal- what?

• 40:06H. Foley?

  Jalapeno Whopper and the fried onions and all that kinda stuff. They gotta get back to the basics, man. Fuck!

• 40:14Speaker 01

  I feel you, dog.

• 40:16H. Foley?

  We're never gonna be 100% back until Burger King gets their shit together. I don't know what that idiot's doing over there. He needs to get his fucking head out of his ass.

• 40:26H. Foley?

  Yeah, that's straight talk right there.

• 40:28Speaker 01

  I feel ya. And there goes any sort of endorsement deal we had on the

• 40:31H. Foley?

  They should call. I care.

• 40:36H. Foley?

  McDonald's don't need the money. They're doing great. Burger King's gotta come back.

• 40:42H. Foley?

  Think they should bring back styrofoam cups. That might be the first step.

• 40:45Speaker 01

  Think your dolphin may have a problem with that.

• 40:48H. Foley?

  Chick-fil-A does it. Who they paying? Who did greasing?

• 40:51Speaker 01

  They're one with God, dog.

• 40:54H. Foley?

  Sonic does it too.

• 40:55Speaker 01

  That's why they're top of their game right now.

• 40:57H. Foley?

  What?

• 40:57Speaker 01

  Chick. Also, if fucking Burger King was one tenth of as good as Chick-fil-A, everybody would turn a blind eye to the fucking styrofoam.

• 41:07H. Foley?

  You know what's really good over at Burger King? That they really don't push enough because I know people don't really dig it. Their big fish. Their fish sandwich is fucking fantastic.

• 41:18Speaker 01

  You're living different.

• 41:19H. Foley?

  Why?

• 41:19Speaker 01

  You're living different, dude. You're getting the big fish at Burger King.

• 41:24H. Foley?

  You don't like a big fish? It's healthier for you. I like a big fish. I like a fish sandwich.

• 41:30Speaker 01

  No one says you can't like a fish sandwich.

• 41:35Speaker 01

  Now, is that a big fish of the area? Is that a local?

• 41:40H. Foley?

  It's North Atlantic cod.

• 41:41Speaker 01

  Locally caught?

• 41:42H. Foley?

  North Atlantic cod. Or fluke.

• 41:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, a lot of eyeballs in that fish.

• 41:48H. Foley?

  What are you talking about? Nice piece of cod. I love the saying, uh, piece of fish. Nice piece of fish. Very old school saying, piece of fish.

• 41:59Speaker 01

  You're an old school guy.

• 42:00H. Foley?

  Friend of mine was saying it. She's like, I'd love to have a piece of fish. Nice piece of fish. It's cute.

• 42:06Speaker 01

  It's cool.

• 42:08H. Foley?

  This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp.

• 42:09Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 42:10H. Foley?

  Gang, BetterHelp's 2026 State of the Stigma Report. How we all doing?

• 42:18H. Foley?

  How we really doing? Why is stigma still keeping people from getting help? That stigma about going to therapy?

• 42:25Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 42:25H. Foley?

  Fuck it. Makes you better.

• 42:28Speaker 01

  Gotta push through that.

• 42:29H. Foley?

  Push through that, yeah. Don't let anybody break your balls about talking things out with somebody. Shit. Therapy's turned my life around.

• 42:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, uh, if you've been listening to the show for a while, you know we're big advocates of, uh, you know, positive mental health and talk therapy is a huge, easy tool. Easy to do. It's tough to overcome that stigma of what your parents might think. Your old school dad who don't think that's for...

• 42:52H. Foley?

  What are you telling them in there?

• 42:53Speaker 01

  Uh, what are you, you going in your bad mouth me?

• 42:56H. Foley?

  You blame me? I tried my best with you.

• 42:58Speaker 01

  Oh, sorry. I did the best I could with what I had.

• 43:01H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 43:01Speaker 01

  And you go, that's why I'm here.

• 43:03H. Foley?

  With your pudding pops and your fucking G.I. Joe commercials.

• 43:06Speaker 01

  A little too specific. Uh, BetterHelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the U.S. BetterHelp does the initial matchmaking for you so you can focus on your therapy goals. I have always said it's easy to get involved. I've used BetterHelp. It's easy to go, boom, I get started, and then you can figure out who the exact fit, uh, for your therapist is. Don't let stigma stand in the way of your support. Start therapy with BetterHelp. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/garbage. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P, dot com slash garbage. Do it.

• 43:36H. Foley?

  Do it. Kim, let's talk about Chime.

• 43:39Speaker 01

  Chime!

• 43:40H. Foley?

  As you know, baby, life comes at you pretty quick.

• 43:42Speaker 01

  You ain't lying, big man.

• 43:43H. Foley?

  Things start adding up.

• 43:44Speaker 01

  Uh-huh.

• 43:45H. Foley?

  You know what I'm saying? I wish I could go back and tell my younger self, if you're gonna do a little banking, make sure you save your money, make sure you do it right, watch out for bank fees, all that kinda stuff. I'll tell you what I really wish. I could go back and say, hey, I wish I had Chime.

• 43:59Speaker 01

  I know. Listen, if you're out there, this is where Chime comes in. Chime is changing the way people bank. It's hard, listen, it's hard enough to keep a buck as it is. Then you got these big corporate banks coming after ya.

• 44:12H. Foley?

  Overdraft fees.

• 44:13Speaker 01

  Overdraft fee, uh, monthly statement, that is, oh, oh, five dollars for this, ten dollars for that. They got their hand in your pocket. Not with Chime. Chime offers the most rewarding, fee-free banking, all with no overdraft fees, no monthly fees.

• 44:27Speaker 01

  No minimum balances. You get 5% cash back on the Chime card in a category of your choice, like gas or groceries, all while building credit through regular, everyday spending. And if you're ever in a pinch, SpotMe lets you overdraft up to $200 fee-free. Look at that. I know, I need that, dog. Uh, right now, you can join the millions that are already banking fee-free with America's number one choice for banking. Head to chime.com/garbage. That's chime.com/garbage. Sign up now. It only takes a few minutes.

• 44:54H. Foley?

  Do it.

• 44:55Speaker 04

  Chime is a fintech, not a bank. Banking services and Chime Card provided by Chime's bank partners. Qualifying direct deposits required. Terms and limits apply. Go to chime.com/disclosures for details.

• 45:07Speaker 01

  Um, alright, let's see here. Um, this one's from Brisket Brigade. $10 Hell's Kitchen rent supplier. Never had one. Red, shout out to you. "Is it garbage to do a taco bar at your wedding instead of traditional meal because it's $2,000 cheaper? We're cutting corners at any chance we can get to be easy on the wallet." I don't hate it.

• 45:30H. Foley?

  No. I love it.

• 45:33Speaker 01

  Taco bar means you do it yourself. Well, I'm assuming that you go... That's it.

• 45:37H. Foley?

  What the fuck are we doing?

• 45:38Speaker 01

  That... Have it there the whole time, too.

• 45:41H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 45:41Speaker 01

  Like, so if people get there and want to get eaten, let them get eaten. If people want to go get fucked up and then go... I would be like...

• 45:49H. Foley?

  Taco bar all night.

• 45:50Speaker 01

  I'd be doing one every 30 minutes to take off the fucking... To take the booze off. Let's delete a couple of them. Be your... Take a couple of the drinks off my palate.

• 45:58H. Foley?

  Trashy, yes.

• 46:01H. Foley?

  Fantastic, yes.

• 46:02Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 46:03H. Foley?

  But is it even trashy? It's like, we've gotten to a point with fucking these weddings where it's like...

• 46:12Speaker 01

  Burger King.

• 46:15H. Foley?

  We've gotten to a point where it's just dumb shit. You get a nice wedding and you fucking throw a taco bar at it? Damn. I love that.

• 46:25Speaker 01

  I do think, you know, it depend. I don't know how stoked everybody would be about that.

• 46:32H. Foley?

  Why? Fuck them. Tell them to fucking take it on a heel and toe.

• 46:36Speaker 01

  I just.

• 46:37H. Foley?

  Get the bricks.

• 46:38Speaker 01

  I mean, you know.

• 46:39H. Foley?

  Who's gonna get mad at a, who the fuck?

• 46:41Speaker 01

  Some aunts, uncle going, you drug me out here all the way to fucking, I drove two and a half hours. I put 200 in the fucking envelope. You got me dressed up in a fucking suit and a tie. I'm sweating my fucking balls off and I'm here doing my own fucking taquitos?

• 46:56H. Foley?

  Yeah, well, you're not here for the fucking food. You're here because you love me. All right? Now shut the fuck up.

• 47:01Speaker 01

  He's talking to me?

• 47:03H. Foley?

  Now shut the fuck up. There's only 100 in the envelope.

• 47:07Speaker 01

  Now, what would anybody in your family say if we got all the way out there and you had fucking, you just had a taco bar?

• 47:14H. Foley?

  What are you talking about? My wedding in Hawaii?

• 47:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.

• 47:18H. Foley?

  Yeah, I know what you're talking about.

• 47:20Speaker 01

  I mean, you had to drive to Tommy Cassidy's wedding in upstate New York. You bitch, you still bitch about how long it took you to get there. If he got there and let's just say they ran out of fucking, you know, they ran out of carne asada.

• 47:34H. Foley?

  You think I'm having carne asada? That's ground beef bitch. Are you nuts? Fuck that. You're not getting no carne asada. No, you're getting ground beef and you're getting beans for the vegetarians, which I'll be honest with you, I don't mind a fucking black bean taco.

• 47:53H. Foley?

  Black bean chalupa, they're delicious.

• 47:56Speaker 01

  You do have to, you do have to see that some people would be like, what the, you got your fucking nana on a walker trying to carry a?

• 48:04H. Foley?

  I'll make her a goddamn plate. Somebody will, an aunt or something. Shut her up.

• 48:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 48:11H. Foley?

  I did bitch the whole time going to Tommy's wedding, but I'll tell you what, I got there and those goddamn bacon wrapped scallops turned my whole day around. They were delicious and so was the, uh, the, the.

• 48:22Speaker 01

  Just for the record, you bitch for about a year and a half afterwards too. Just saying, just saying.

• 48:29H. Foley?

  Scallops were good though.

• 48:30Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 48:30H. Foley?

  And it was a lovely time.

• 48:32Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 48:32H. Foley?

  And I was a different person back then.

• 48:37Speaker 01

  Sure, we had a nice dinner out that weekend as well.

• 48:40H. Foley?

  Yes, we did. Oh, yes, we did. Yeah, the four of us.

• 48:49H. Foley?

  I like the taco bar idea.

• 48:51Speaker 01

  I, I, I like it as well. Uh, go for it. Definitely if you need to, if you're cut, you know, no qualms if you're trying to cook. But I give people maybe the heads up. Also not, you know, people are dancing, you got a belly full of fucking, you know.

• 49:05H. Foley?

  Who doesn't want a fucking taco when they're all fucked up?

• 49:07Speaker 01

  I'm, I'm on board. I'm just saying, not everybody, you know, might want to fucking.

• 49:13H. Foley?

  What's that taco bar look like? I'm, okay, I'm doing ground beef. First of all, we're going straight up Ortega, like that kind of spice, that kind of seasoning. So we're doing, we're doing taco meat.

• 49:23Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 49:24H. Foley?

  Chopped up onions, chopped up tomato, chopped up iceberg lettuce.

• 49:28Speaker 01

  In there, pre-mixed or like in the bowl?

• 49:30H. Foley?

  No, no, in the thing. Salad bar. Yeah. Some sour cream, some guacamole.

• 49:35Speaker 01

  Harshell, soft shell?

• 49:37H. Foley?

  Both. Do both. Have some ding dong standing there doing the fucking tacos, the, the, the fajitas, heating them up, a little flame, bang. Two seconds.

• 49:50Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 49:51H. Foley?

  Yeah, nice.

• 49:52Speaker 01

  You know what would be nice if somebody made them for you?

• 49:57H. Foley?

  That's something.

• 49:58Speaker 01

  Hey, let me get two chicken, two, whatever.

• 50:00H. Foley?

  Chipotle style.

• 50:00Speaker 01

  And then they fucking whip them up real nice. So you don't have to fucking, you got a suit and a tile, you got a nice dress, you won't be dealing with fucking.

• 50:08H. Foley?

  You know what else too?

• 50:08Speaker 01

  I like that. That's nice.

• 50:10H. Foley?

  You could do it in a bowl, because you know my thing, I don't like the layers on a taco. Mix it all together, throw it in the fucking, in the, in the mitt.

• 50:16Speaker 01

  You're gonna need another guy for that. Now you're talking.

• 50:19H. Foley?

  No, you're doing that in a bowl.

• 50:20Speaker 01

  What?

• 50:21H. Foley?

  Take two seconds. It's like a guy that does the salads at a deli. They make those in three seconds. Don't they?

• 50:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, but you need a guy then, there's more dishes involved to me with that.

• 50:32H. Foley?

  All right, so you get two guys. You're still saving money with the fucking taco bar.

• 50:35Speaker 01

  Where the bowls going? You need a fresh bowl every time.

• 50:37H. Foley?

  No, you don't. You don't need a fresh bowl. You wipe it out. They're tacos.

• 50:42Speaker 01

  Okay, you clearly never worked in a kitchen. That's gonna sting. That's gonna sting them.

• 50:50Speaker 01

  I was just saying.

• 50:51H. Foley?

  I was a hot shot fucking fry guy at the li- on the line of Pussers Landing on the intercoastal waterway in fucking Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina. Summer of 96, bitch. Down there working. Scallops, shrimp. We did a fantastic-

• 51:06Speaker 01

  Ate it all.

• 51:07H. Foley?

  I did. We did a fantastic fried seafood sampler.

• 51:11Speaker 01

  So you know, you gotta wash the-

• 51:13H. Foley?

  You gotta wash them.

• 51:14Speaker 01

  You gotta wash the balls, I mean, yeah.

• 51:16H. Foley?

  We used to do fried oysters, too.

• 51:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:18H. Foley?

  Oh, they were so good. Beer battered fried oysters. Phew, man, got my hands on a couple of them.

• 51:25H. Foley?

  Sick one.

• 51:28Speaker 01

  Took out a whole family reunion. Shrimp was underdone.

• 51:35H. Foley?

  I- I don't know how you tell it's sucking wrapped up.

• 51:37Speaker 01

  The Jenkins did not see it coming. Three generations of Jenkinses, oh, fuck.

• 51:43H. Foley?

  I usually had one incident at every job I ever worked at.

• 51:46Speaker 01

  You've had a couple here, I'll give you.

• 51:51Speaker 01

  I think it's pretty- if you're on the Patreon, it's pretty well documented, big man's got a couple of fucking, uh, uh, blemishes in the file.

• 52:00H. Foley?

  A couple food poisonings. You know.

• 52:04Speaker 01

  Sure, it had the nature of the beast.

• 52:05H. Foley?

  Nature of the beast.

• 52:06Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 52:06H. Foley?

  And then when I worked at the Hess station, I got- I squirted gas in that lady's face.

• 52:10Speaker 01

  She owed you twenty bucks.

• 52:14H. Foley?

  Poor lady.

• 52:15Speaker 01

  I don't think I ever heard that story. You don't know that one?

• 52:16H. Foley?

  One hundred percent.

• 52:17Speaker 01

  I don't- I'm telling you, I've never heard- I don't think I've heard that's- Tied to ringing a bell.

• 52:20H. Foley?

  Really?

• 52:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:21H. Foley?

  So me and my buddy Kramer, uh, one summer, had the greatest job ever. We worked at Hess gas station on Germantown Pike, and it was like a pit, because it was a two-lane highway with a divider in the middle. So you had to come in, you pulled in, get your gas on and stuff. That's when we had that scam going with the fucking-

• 52:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:37H. Foley?

  Uh, with the- with the-

• 52:38Speaker 01

  Change. Or the- the-

• 52:39H. Foley?

  The- the- you got a coupon for, uh, ten dollars a premium, you got whatever. So we would do the floater gallons, save it up, right, fill out the cards, walk out of it with another thirty, forty bucks. Cash.

• 52:51Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm. What, this old lady get onto your scam, wanna fucking- wanna scam, and you had a douser? What happened?

• 52:58H. Foley?

  How the fuck am I gonna skim from this skin?

• 53:00Speaker 01

  This lady's bleeding me dry. It's like trying to get blood from a stone.

• 53:06H. Foley?

  Yeah, I think we can work that out.

• 53:09Speaker 01

  Did you say premium?

• 53:11H. Foley?

  Yeah, with thirty-five cents of unleaded. I would shut her up.

• 53:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, she pulled the- Thirty-five? Probably back then a gallon of gas was eighty cents. That's like a, that's like a half a gallon you hit it with.

• 53:22H. Foley?

  Dude, I think I actually squirted her with like five cents. It's a lot, man. It's a lot. Cause you could see it on the pump what I hit her with. And no, it wasn't retribution.

• 53:35H. Foley?

  I have to have told you this. She was a heavyset lady. She pulled in one of those old minivans.

• 53:40Speaker 01

  I bet she was.

• 53:46Speaker 01

  Heavyset lady, heavyset boy.

• 53:48H. Foley?

  She was wearing a Stick It Anywhere t-shirt?

• 53:50Speaker 01

  And all he can eat, parachute.

• 53:55H. Foley?

  Yeah, she pulled in. She was a sweet lady. She had the short lady haircut, you know, curls. Bigger girl. She pulled in one of those little woodies, those, uh, those minivans.

• 54:05Speaker 01

  You might have been describing Denise.

• 54:08H. Foley?

  And her husband, who was a juice head, was behind her in another car. He was in like a white Pontiac. I didn't realize that was her husband. And she rolled down the window and she's like, you know, fill it up with whatever. And it was this old school pump and I was just happening to be holding it like towards her by accident. And when I went to fucking-

• 54:23Speaker 01

  Thing you'd never join the military.

• 54:25H. Foley?

  And I went to jam it up and when I did it, like a muscle thing, I squeezed it and hit her with like five cents of fucking-

• 54:31Speaker 01

  In the car?

• 54:32H. Foley?

  Yeah, she was sitting in the car.

• 54:38H. Foley?

  And she fucking like fell out of the car and was rolling around on the ground screaming.

• 54:43Speaker 01

  Lady, stop being dr- you get mad at her. It's what you would do.

• 54:45H. Foley?

  I had to have told you-

• 54:47Speaker 01

  I don't remember that, no.

• 54:48H. Foley?

  Yeah, she was, I was so bad. There was nothing I could do. She was just rolling around screaming. I can't see, oh my god!

• 54:56Speaker 01

  I retell you that my-

• 54:56H. Foley?

  And then her husband came over and was like, "What the fuck?" And I was like, "I'm sorry, it was an accident." And then Dale, my manager, came out with some kind of, uh, shit that they had in the back for when that happened.

• 55:06Speaker 01

  Like sand or something?

• 55:07H. Foley?

  Something like that.

• 55:08Speaker 01

  Hit her with the Ansel system? Foam her?

• 55:12H. Foley?

  The whole- Shut down the fucking gas station.

• 55:16Speaker 01

  You stink.

• 55:18H. Foley?

  I had to get, I had to use that thing in science class. This kid, Mike Brown squirted me in the eyes.

• 55:22Speaker 01

  A fart pad or something? Oh, the eye wash?

• 55:25H. Foley?

  Yeah, this kid, Mike Brown, I like flicked him or something like that and he squirted me in the eye with hydrochloric acid.

• 55:29Speaker 01

  You've been a dickhead your whole life, haven't you? You really have.

• 55:32H. Foley?

  But it was diluted, he could have fucking blinded me. And I remember I tried to get out of wrestling practice that day. And fucking Mr. Landis was like, no, what's your problem?

• 55:41Speaker 01

  You didn't miss lunch, did you, fat ass?

• 55:45H. Foley?

  This was after.

• 55:45Speaker 01

  I seen you down there.

• 55:49Speaker 01

  A whole stack of pancakes breakfast for lunch, huh?

• 55:54H. Foley?

  Yeah, and Mr. Uh, ah, fuck, I can't remember his name, Mr. Stoller or something like that, had to like, drag me into the back and fucking stick my head in this thing. It was actually very refreshing, the water's very bubbly.

• 56:05Speaker 01

  Oh, nice.

• 56:06H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 56:08H. Foley?

  Yeah, tried to blind me.

• 56:11Speaker 01

  We had a, we had a traumatic experience at a gas station in, uh, Jersey. I, I think I might have told, I was either telling Nadine this or telling you. You go to my.

• 56:22H. Foley?

  That's where we're at?

• 56:23Speaker 01

  What?

• 56:23H. Foley?

  Confusing me with your wife?

• 56:28Speaker 01

  Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

• 56:30H. Foley?

  I still grab my titties, huh? Hey, done.

• 56:32Speaker 01

  Geez, my wife.

• 56:33H. Foley?

  That's, I'm saying, don't grab mine.

• 56:37H. Foley?

  Be respectful.

• 56:39Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 56:41Speaker 01

  Um.

• 56:42H. Foley?

  Did you say creep?

• 56:43Speaker 01

  I did.

• 56:48Speaker 01

  My mom was driving me and her, I think we were in the, the Woody van, or maybe the Taurus. And my aunt lived, uh, in, uh, Pennsauken, like Merchantville, Pennsauken, New Jersey, right over the bridge. We go over the, that was, uh, that might as well have been a hundred miles away.

• 57:05H. Foley?

  But they always had parties there on the radio here, we're in Pennsauken, New Jersey.

• 57:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:10H. Foley?

  It was like a night, I just, I imagine just.

• 57:12Speaker 01

  Down there at the Jug Handel, something like that.

• 57:14H. Foley?

  Yeah, some sleazy club.

• 57:16Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 57:17H. Foley?

  Where like you're older.

• 57:18Speaker 01

  That's not where we were going, we're going, nice house.

• 57:20H. Foley?

  Yeah, right. You're sitting in the car while she's.

• 57:23Speaker 01

  We're at Vader's.

• 57:25H. Foley?

  You're sitting in the car while she's in daffodils. Getting liquored up.

• 57:32H. Foley?

  You gotta sit in the car and do your math homework like a bitch.

• 57:38Speaker 01

  But it was a, I remember a dark, cold night and-

• 57:42H. Foley?

  Your head's getting scooped out in the backseat. I don't know what they were up to.

• 57:47Speaker 01

  You know her, I'm telling her you said-

• 57:48H. Foley?

  No, I didn't, that's why I didn't say specific aunt.

• 57:53H. Foley?

  Technicality, bug me.

• 57:55Speaker 01

  They, uh, we were getting, it was the la- I think it genuinely might have been the last time my mom ever got gas in New Jersey. Cause we, dark, like, winter night, fall night, it's like nine o'clock, eight, nine o'clock, we're going back home, school night, I remember.

• 58:15H. Foley?

  Why does a school night, eight o'clock, fall so late?

• 58:17Speaker 01

  It might, dude, cold, must, it was-

• 58:20H. Foley?

  It's school night.

• 58:21Speaker 01

  It was like-

• 58:21H. Foley?

  Oh, I fucking hated that shit.

• 58:23Speaker 01

  It was like an arduous journey-

• 58:24H. Foley?

  Shut up.

• 58:25Speaker 01

  -it felt like, to get home, like, you know, home, how, I'm gonna be home at midnight, it felt, I mean, meanwhile, I was 35 minutes away or whatever.

• 58:32H. Foley?

  And you didn't get up until seven, so you got at least fucking seven hours of sleep.

• 58:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:36H. Foley?

  Fat little bastard.

• 58:37Speaker 01

  I knew you.

• 58:40H. Foley?

  You always say, "Oh my god, how am I gonna make it, it's a school night," it was the pressure that they put on you, it's a school night.

• 58:47Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 58:47H. Foley?

  Shut the fuck up.

• 58:48Speaker 01

  I can see what age you're at in therapy.

• 58:54Speaker 01

  Um, so, uh, I don't know, this story's going on way longer than it needs to, um, in Jersey, you don't know, they pump your gas in Jersey.

• 59:05H. Foley?

  Yeah, I know.

• 59:06Speaker 01

  And my mom pulled up and rolled the window down, there wasn't an attendant there, I didn't tell you that, there wasn't an attendant.

• 59:11H. Foley?

  I feel like you might have, go ahead.

• 59:12Speaker 01

  And then, he was an Indian gentleman, and she, like, lost, he was in the blind spot of the car-

• 59:17H. Foley?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 59:17Speaker 01

  And he stuck his head all the way in the window.

• 59:23Speaker 01

  I'll never forget his face, dude, I made dead, I made dead eye contact with him, and my mom turned around, and he was right here, and he went, "Peel it up," and dude- Ahhh, like, fuck it, I'm surprised she didn't put him in the Cobra clutch, she lost it. Ahhh, purse went everywhere, fly, did we, vrrrr, high-tailed it out. Never was-

• 59:45H. Foley?

  She spit out?

• 59:45Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, he freaked, he didn't give him that guy your credit card, you fucking, might as well, no way. Single mom.

• 59:54H. Foley?

  You have told me that story, but man, that's fucking funny.

• 59:58Speaker 01

  She lost her shit.

• 59:59H. Foley?

  Peel it up?

• 1:00:00Speaker 01

  Out the, yeah, never. So that was instilled, you never, like, we gotta get gas before we cross the bridge. That and my dad, my dad would always, this was-

• 1:00:12H. Foley?

  I like getting gas in Jersey. I'm gonna get my fat ass out of the car.

• 1:00:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'll do it for you. You know what's nice to pumps?

• 1:00:18H. Foley?

  I've been baiting on the tips with that. Never had cash in the car.

• 1:00:21Speaker 01

  I got a thing here. This was, uh-

• 1:00:23H. Foley?

  What am I talking about? I haven't driven in like six months.

• 1:00:27H. Foley?

  I got, I got the car back.

• 1:00:29Speaker 01

  You got it?

• 1:00:29H. Foley?

  No, I'm going to get it.

• 1:00:30Speaker 01

  So you didn't get it back?

• 1:00:31H. Foley?

  But I got my license back.

• 1:00:32Speaker 01

  You got your license back, did you?

• 1:00:34H. Foley?

  I mean, it's according to-

• 1:00:35Speaker 01

  Oh, so no. That was, that was, that was a double-

• 1:00:38H. Foley?

  According to JB, I do. It was June 23rd.

• 1:00:41Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:00:42H. Foley?

  So I'm legal. I figure what I'll do is I'll get the car, run a couple of red lights, have the NYPD chase me, and then say, hey, is my license-

• 1:00:52Speaker 01

  Suicide bike cop.

• 1:00:56H. Foley?

  Now I'm gonna ask a cop, make sure. I'm gonna go online.

• 1:01:00H. Foley?

  Take a class.

• 1:01:00Speaker 01

  You're not doing any of that.

• 1:01:01H. Foley?

  The fuck I'm not?

• 1:01:02Speaker 01

  I know you're not.

• 1:01:04H. Foley?

  We're at group therapy tonight, too.

• 1:01:06Speaker 01

  You keep saying that. You've said it so much, I don't believe you at this point, if I'm being honest with you.

• 1:01:11H. Foley?

  I definitely won't be at the hustler club.

• 1:01:14Speaker 01

  That's still open?

• 1:01:15H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:15Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:01:16H. Foley?

  I don't go, I don't go strip clubs.

• 1:01:18Speaker 01

  Alright.

• 1:01:21Speaker 01

  Okay, um, what the fuck was I saying? What were we just talking about?

• 1:01:25Speaker 02

  Something about your dad?

• 1:01:27Speaker 01

  Um, no, what, uh, what I don't like is-

• 1:01:31H. Foley?

  Gas in Jersey.

• 1:01:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, oh, my dad would never, it's too, duh, duh, duh, put a button in that. This was way, I was working with him. I mean, I was in my twenties, and he refused to use a credit card in New Jersey.

• 1:01:46H. Foley?

  Cause they rob you.

• 1:01:47Speaker 01

  Cause you give him the card and then-

• 1:01:49H. Foley?

  Or they walk away with it.

• 1:01:50Speaker 01

  They walk into the hut, to like, and he goes, you know what the fuck that guy's doing in there? He's writing my shit down. He'll always cash. I go, you're fucking nuts. This was in-

• 1:02:00H. Foley?

  They do sometimes though.

• 1:02:01Speaker 01

  This was in 2000, oh, yeah, I know, but this was in 2000-

• 1:02:06Speaker 01

  Well, you know, this wasn't, this wasn't that long ago. He's like, nah. We'd stop at a Wawa, hit an ATM, forty cash, regular. And a pack of heaters. Pack of that Marlboro lights you got there, guy.

• 1:02:20H. Foley?

  Is that what he pulled, Marlboro lights?

• 1:02:22Speaker 01

  Nah, he's Reds.

• 1:02:23H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 1:02:25H. Foley?

  Think he's still smoking Reds?

• 1:02:28Speaker 01

  I haven't talked to him in a long time, but if I had to assume, I would assume, yeah.

• 1:02:31H. Foley?

  Damn. He was smoking Reds the last time he seen him.

• 1:02:34Speaker 01

  He's been smoking Reds every time I've ever seen him, ever, in my life. Yeah.

• 1:02:41Speaker 01

  But I gotta, I gotta build, this is a little hard feelings or whatever, but, uh, I got a little bit of a beef with people at this point now complaining about the tipping on the screens. You know what I mean? It's like, I, listen, I'm not, I...

• 1:03:00H. Foley?

  Wait, you have beef with the people that are complaining about it?

• 1:03:02Speaker 01

  Yeah. It's like, cause they always lead up, my problem is they always lead off with, "I'm a good tipper." And it's like...

• 1:03:10H. Foley?

  They have it at the airport, though.

• 1:03:12Speaker 01

  Where?

• 1:03:13H. Foley?

  They do that shit at the airport. Like, do you wanna leave a tip?

• 1:03:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, where?

• 1:03:17H. Foley?

  For whatever. The Hudson News and shit.

• 1:03:20Speaker 02

  That's a roundup for, like, a charity or whatever.

• 1:03:23Speaker 01

  But don't do that either. Don't do that. Cause the fucking card, the, the, the credit card, they wet their, everybody wets their beak on that but you. And then goddamn poor kids. But it's always like, "I fucking, uh, I'm a, now I'm a good tipper, but I'm gonna complain about they're asking me for eighteen percent of a five dollar cup of coffee." If you're complaining about the dollar on a cup of coffee, hate to break it to you, you're not that great of a tipper.

• 1:03:50H. Foley?

  I'm just so irresponsible that, whatever. I just hit it. Keep it moving.

• 1:03:55Speaker 01

  Also say, no, I, I, I do think it's aggressive how they go this, and it's, that's all from the, the card processing. Companies.

• 1:04:03H. Foley?

  Is that who's doing it?

• 1:04:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, because they get three and a half to four percent on it.

• 1:04:08H. Foley?

  At a tip?

• 1:04:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:04:09H. Foley?

  They do.

• 1:04:09Speaker 01

  Because they get a total, they, it behooves them to make the total higher because they take a higher, they take a percentage.

• 1:04:16H. Foley?

  Man.

• 1:04:17Speaker 01

  So it's, it's all the, yeah, it's all the credit card companies doing it. The credit card processing company, like the Toast or whatever. They wet their beak on all that.

• 1:04:25H. Foley?

  Is that what Toast is?

• 1:04:26Speaker 01

  I don't know, but somebody's wetting their beak on it. And it ain't me. I thought, stop going. I'm a great tipper. I just get mad when they ask me for 20% of a $5 cup of coffee. Just give them the dollar, or don't give them the dollar. Don't try to tell me you're a good tipper.

• 1:04:40H. Foley?

  Who are you hanging out with that are complaining about this?

• 1:04:43Speaker 01

  It was mainly one kid. Alright, it was me.

• 1:04:47H. Foley?

  Was it?

• 1:04:48Speaker 01

  This is all about myself.

• 1:04:49H. Foley?

  Is it you're hanging out with down there in suburbia?

• 1:04:51Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:04:51H. Foley?

  Bunch of whiners and complainers?

• 1:04:53Speaker 01

  And what are you?

• 1:04:54H. Foley?

  I'm fucking on the front line still, here in the city, getting it done. Not down there in the rear with the gear.

• 1:05:00Speaker 01

  None of that means anything. She just say stuff. Also, pull the curtain. You didn't come to work yesterday. You're not getting it done.

• 1:05:08H. Foley?

  I'm sick. I'm here today ill.

• 1:05:13H. Foley?

  For you.

• 1:05:13Speaker 01

  For, oh yeah, thanks.

• 1:05:16H. Foley?

  I have to go to the doctor. Scared. They're all that.

• 1:05:19Speaker 01

  Legionnaires disease is going around.

• 1:05:20H. Foley?

  Don't fucking say that.

• 1:05:22Speaker 01

  Just saying.

• 1:05:24Speaker 01

  Um, alright, let's see this one's from James McCarthy. $10 homie, ever use pancakes or waffles as a bun for your hamburger? That's a great question. I've never thought of that. I've never been in the position where I needed to do that. I've never made a sandwich with, I've done like, I guess peanut butter on top of two Egos probably. But, yeah. I'm assuming you, well, I mean, I guess that would just be the McGriddle, effectively.

• 1:05:50H. Foley?

  Not with a hamburger, with sausage.

• 1:05:52Speaker 01

  Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:05:53H. Foley?

  But.

• 1:05:55H. Foley?

  Not that long ago.

• 1:06:00Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 1:06:01H. Foley?

  I was at my mother's.

• 1:06:02Speaker 01

  You can't say anything that can shock me at this point. No, there's genuinely nothing.

• 1:06:07H. Foley?

  Hmm.

• 1:06:09Speaker 01

  I mean, do you think there is?

• 1:06:10H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:11Speaker 01

  There's not. That would shock me. There's stuff I don't know, for sure. There's nothing that would shock me.

• 1:06:15H. Foley?

  What the fuck is that shit?

• 1:06:17Speaker 01

  You just alluded to-

• 1:06:18H. Foley?

  There's things I don't know.

• 1:06:20Speaker 01

  I'm not saying, well, you just said there's stuff I could tell you that would shock me.

• 1:06:23H. Foley?

  You know everything.

• 1:06:24Speaker 01

  Clearly, that would shock me, no?

• 1:06:25H. Foley?

  Huh?

• 1:06:26Speaker 01

  How could something I, you said, you know, there's-

• 1:06:29H. Foley?

  I made a ham and cheese sandwich using an egg o' waffle.

• 1:06:31Speaker 01

  Okay, I don't know why you made it so serious after-

• 1:06:34H. Foley?

  And it's delicious. I still did, I still did the Dijon mustard and everything. It all works.

• 1:06:39Speaker 01

  It's just like, it's like buttermilk bread effect, essentially.

• 1:06:42H. Foley?

  All works.

• 1:06:42Speaker 01

  Well, was there no bread, or you decided to get wacky?

• 1:06:47Speaker 01

  I'm okay with either way.

• 1:06:48H. Foley?

  I decided to get wacky.

• 1:06:49Speaker 01

  Fair enough.

• 1:06:49H. Foley?

  I'm a weird guy.

• 1:06:50Speaker 01

  You're allowed to do whatever you want.

• 1:06:51H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:51Speaker 01

  Doesn't shock me.

• 1:06:52H. Foley?

  Ah, interesting.

• 1:06:53Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:06:55H. Foley?

  You know I have two penises?

• 1:06:56Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm, doesn't shock me.

• 1:06:58H. Foley?

  Hmm. One's on my foot.

• 1:07:00Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm, can't see that one either. Hey, Dan. Is this thing on? Hey, Dan.

• 1:07:04H. Foley?

  What were you gonna say, one's on my butt?

• 1:07:06Speaker 01

  There's in my butt.

• 1:07:08Speaker 01

  He actually has three. Keep them in his mouth, too.

• 1:07:13Speaker 01

  You call that a three-seater. Hey, Dan!

• 1:07:15H. Foley?

  Hey, Dan. Um, yeah, it's really good. And anything on, you know, the fucking, uh, what's it called? Monte Cristo. Which is basically a ham, cheese, and turkey on French toast.

• 1:07:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, no syrup, though.

• 1:07:30H. Foley?

  Use syrup.

• 1:07:31Speaker 01

  Okay, I don't, I don't-

• 1:07:32H. Foley?

  Syrup, not sorup.

• 1:07:33Speaker 01

  Whatever. What does my wife do? That's different.

• 1:07:36H. Foley?

  I had a blueberry pancake the other day that blew my balls back.

• 1:07:39Speaker 01

  Uh-huh.

• 1:07:39H. Foley?

  Tried it at the Galaxy Diner.

• 1:07:40Speaker 01

  How's that at Zempick working?

• 1:07:42H. Foley?

  Great.

• 1:07:42Speaker 01

  I'm just saying, there's a lot of Burger King talk, a lot of pancake talk, a lot of ham and cheese on waffle talk.

• 1:07:48H. Foley?

  Still going down, baby.

• 1:07:49Speaker 01

  No, no, I'm saying-

• 1:07:50H. Foley?

  Treat every once in a while. Plus a lot of steps, a lot of walking, a lot of working out.

• 1:07:55Speaker 01

  You get so defensive.

• 1:07:58H. Foley?

  How's that Rogaine?

• 1:08:00Speaker 01

  I haven't been taking it.

• 1:08:01H. Foley?

  Really?

• 1:08:02Speaker 01

  I lost, I left it, uh...

• 1:08:04H. Foley?

  I was kidding, by the way.

• 1:08:05Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:08:06H. Foley?

  Just teasing you.

• 1:08:06Speaker 01

  About what?

• 1:08:07H. Foley?

  You look great. I don't want to throw-

• 1:08:09Speaker 01

  Why are you getting weird?

• 1:08:10H. Foley?

  I don't want to throw stones back at you after you make insulting comments. I try to kill them with kindness.

• 1:08:15Speaker 01

  What insulting comment did I make?

• 1:08:17H. Foley?

  You made fun of my weight.

• 1:08:18Speaker 01

  I didn't make fun of your weight.

• 1:08:19H. Foley?

  He says I was fat. Says I was eating a lot of pancakes and a lot of Burger King.

• 1:08:23Speaker 01

  But you said that, you said all of that stuff. I just asked you how's it going to see if you were still taking it because, hold on, don't get weird. We have both have lapsed in it. Oh, I didn't take, I'm taking, I forgot it, this, that, I gotta get re-up. It was mostly that. It wasn't a shot at everything, it was that. And also, you have mentioned the multiple times you've had Burger King recently.

• 1:08:43H. Foley?

  Once. Had Burger King once.

• 1:08:46Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:08:48H. Foley?

  Multiple times.

• 1:08:49Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:08:49H. Foley?

  Hey. I had it once multiple times. Not multiple times during the day. But I have had Burger King.

• 1:08:55Speaker 01

  Multiple times, stop saying once. I mean, it's crazy. It's crazy. You really have to learn how to speak you.

• 1:09:05H. Foley?

  Duh duh.

• 1:09:07Speaker 01

  Can we pull her?

• 1:09:09Speaker 01

  You stink!

• 1:09:11H. Foley?

  Yes, sir!

• 1:09:11Speaker 01

  If you stink and you know, clap your hands. Um...

• 1:09:16H. Foley?

  You doing that with the baby?

• 1:09:17Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:09:18H. Foley?

  If you're a baby and you know, clap your hands?

• 1:09:19Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:09:20H. Foley?

  You doing all the old tunes, the old show tunes? Old McDonald, all that shit?

• 1:09:23Speaker 01

  Chicago.

• 1:09:24H. Foley?

  Chicago?

• 1:09:26Speaker 01

  He said all the old show tunes.

• 1:09:28H. Foley?

  I thought you meant Chicago the band.

• 1:09:33Speaker 01

  We're more of a Steely Dan family.

• 1:09:35H. Foley?

  Does anybody really know what time it is? I love Chicago.

• 1:09:38Speaker 01

  We do clap your hands till daddy comes home.

• 1:09:40H. Foley?

  But what is that? Is that you make that up?

• 1:09:42Speaker 01

  No, because Tommy knows it. It must be a Philly derp. See if you can find out, clap your hands till daddy comes home. Daddy's gonna buy me an ice cream cone so big. Cause Tommy knows, so it might be a Roxboro thing.

• 1:09:54H. Foley?

  Clap your hands till daddy comes home from the bar. Clap your daddy comes home from the bar. The bar must have been far, cause it's really, really late. Clap your hands till daddy comes home from the bar. I hope he doesn't hit mommy when he gets home.

• 1:10:10Speaker 01

  He's probably gonna hit mommy when he gets here.

• 1:10:13H. Foley?

  I hope he didn't spend the rent when he gets home.

• 1:10:15Speaker 01

  Uh.

• 1:10:16Speaker 02

  This is a classic. It comes from the UK, but US.

• 1:10:19H. Foley?

  Hello, hello, it is. It was so dish.

• 1:10:22Speaker 02

  Classic.

• 1:10:23Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:10:23Speaker 02

  Clap hands, clap hands till daddy comes home for daddy's got money and but mommy's got none.

• 1:10:28H. Foley?

  Oh, what the fuck?

• 1:10:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's what I say.

• 1:10:30H. Foley?

  Really pushing the patriarchy over there. That's crazy.

• 1:10:35H. Foley?

  What about moms of the breadwinner, huh? Luke, what about that?

• 1:10:38Speaker 01

  That was in my household.

• 1:10:40H. Foley?

  Really?

• 1:10:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:10:42H. Foley?

  Hot stuff.

• 1:10:47H. Foley?

  All due respect, Mr. Dempsey, of course. They probably hate my guts by now anyway.

• 1:10:53Speaker 01

  Yes, yes, they do. I will answer for you.

• 1:10:56H. Foley?

  I gotta cut my losses at a certain point, you know what I mean? You gotta put a tourniquet on it.

• 1:11:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, you gotta, yeah, you gotta realize.

• 1:11:04H. Foley?

  I've lost some rooms that I'm never gonna get back. I'm aware of that. I don't know what the fuck I did that was that bad.

• 1:11:10Speaker 01

  You're like a, I'll have, I'll have, I'll have Mark the Shark draw up the list. Um, you're like a bad air conditioner, losing rooms, baby.

• 1:11:20H. Foley?

  Is that true? Am I out? The Dempseys?

• 1:11:22Speaker 02

  Lost the complex.

• 1:11:23H. Foley?

  No shit, huh?

• 1:11:24Speaker 01

  Can't keep the room.

• 1:11:25H. Foley?

  Well, I'll miss them.

• 1:11:26Speaker 01

  Ah, fuck them, who cares?

• 1:11:28H. Foley?

  Nah, you know, I like to let people down.

• 1:11:32Speaker 01

  Wait, what?

• 1:11:34Speaker 01

  Wait, when's that, when's that start?

• 1:11:37H. Foley?

  I thought that was kinda your thing.

• 1:11:38Speaker 01

  I thought that's what we were doing this whole time.

• 1:11:42Speaker 01

  Uh, listen, we gotta wrap it up though, gang.

• 1:11:45H. Foley?

  What a fun one.

• 1:11:46Speaker 01

  What a silly one.

• 1:11:47H. Foley?

  That right there, if you're new to the program, is a good old fashioned family episode. We love you guys and we'll see you in three days. Peace.