Stassi Schroeder on Her Reality TV Comeback, Working with Her Husband, and Mom Guilt

We are so excited to have sat down with Stassi Schroeder ahead of her new show, House of Stassi, to get candid about her reality TV comeback, this show’s contrast from anything she’s done before, why she didn’t edit out the “bad parts,” working with her husband, and what she’s most fearful of when it premieres. We also talk about her first TV stint (it wasn’t Vanderpump!), why reality shows are so much different now, filming with Katie Maloney again, the “Mandela Effect” about her and Jax Taylor, and why being on reality TV is her therapy. She also opens up to us about the pressure of being a perfect mom, being the breadwinner and how her and Beau co-parent, if she ever feels envious of her peers, and the trick she uses to avoid the comparison trap. Before Stassi joins us, we discuss whether you’d rather be seen or heard having sex and how we switched roles for this recording. Enjoy! Follow Stassi on Instagram @stassischroeder and check out her new show House of Stassi dropping July 29 on Hulu. Follow us on Instagram @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit girlsgottaeat.com for more. Thank you to our partners this week: Bloom: Get 20% off your first order at https://bloomnu.com with code GGE. Good Wipes: Get a free pack at https://goodwipes.com/gge. Revolve: Get 15% off your first order at https://revolve.com/gge with code GGE. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  I feel like it was just like really important to show this stage of my life and what was really happening. I feel like the second that I'm like, edit this out, it's like downhill from there.

• 0:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  This podcast is a Dear Media production. Hi, guys. Hi, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Girls Gotta Eat. Welcome back. We're together. When was the last time we were together? I was sad this morning. I was like, it's been like three weeks. I know, guys. We don't listen. We're doing our best. Are you? Are you doing your best? No, I hate it. Sign that lease. Oh, I thought you meant on the virtual recordings. No, I hate them. And I am happy. We're doing our best, but I'm happy to be reunited. Do you remember that Peyton Manning commercial? And he's like, cut that meat. And I feel like I'm like, sign that lease. Yeah, she sent me this apartment. She was looking at it. I was like, grow up, sign the lease. I know. But you're also very like, I don't want to pressure you. I don't want to.

• 1:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, because you don't want me to get here and hate it and blame you. No, I know what it's like to. That's it. I know what it's like to live here. But we'll talk about it. I've looked at a few places. Big milestone today, guys. I beat Raina to the studio. That's insane. Raina was two minutes late. Which is late for me. Can I tell you? So, okay, guys, I just, you know what? It's all washing over me that we have switched roles today. I'm in your outfit. I'm cosplaying you. That is a more me outfit. You haven't even said anything, Raina. It's my first pair of culottes.

• 1:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  How does she? I'm dressed like you. I can't believe you have. I'm just waiting for you to say something. Trying to acclimate to being the same broom as you. You asked, well, you asked me if your nipples should be out. And I was like, this is the first time in nine years you've even thought about whether your nipples should be out or not. No, no, no, like, not nipples. Just, I'm 43. I wanted to know, I need to pull them up. Oh, pull up the nipples? No, they're good. Great culottes, great nipples. But you're dressed a little more like me. Yeah. We both do exercise dresses, me more so. So, we really have switched roles. And then I get here early because I'd be flying on the city bike. You know, I just jump on the bike. I'm on time in Newark more than anywhere else. And then you roll up late with a croissant. Could you want to be me anymore? Late with the pastry. It's funny that you think 1202 is late, you, the late. For you.

• 2:23Rayna Greenberg?

  And I got here, okay, you guys, my allegiance to being early, not early, I don't like to be early. I like to be on time. My allegiance to being on time is like, my anxiety is so bad, like even when it doesn't really matter. If I'm just gonna be three minutes late, I start to like panic. And it was 11:59 and I was standing outside this building and I was like, I want this Maman, everything croissant so bad. We split one the last time.

• 2:45Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes.

• 2:45Rayna Greenberg?

  And I just like wanted, I was like, do I have the time? Like, I wasn't sure.

• 2:50Ashley Hesseltine?

  To show up late with a pastry in an exercise dress and I'm here early in culottes and flip flops. We have switched roles completely.

• 2:58Rayna Greenberg?

  It reminds me when you show up to work late and you're like, oh my God, everything was like crazy, but you're holding a latte. Like I, but it never crossed my mind that you would be in this room when I walked into this room.

• 3:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, we have to go to Maman after this anyway, too. Okay, Raina, one of the craziest things you've done. I haven't even shared this. I'm still digesting it. This is months ago when we, what happened? We went to this wedding in Cabo and you came.

• 3:22Rayna Greenberg?

  I don't know what you're gonna say.

• 3:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  You guys are gonna be shocked by this, because Raina is on time. We don't like too early, too. So we had a shuttle that was leaving for dinner. Raina comes down 10 minutes late.

• 3:34Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 3:34Ashley Hesseltine?

  Eight, eight minutes late. And you come in hot and then I'm like, surely she's gonna be like, I'm so sorry I'm late, whatever. Cause we have to get on the shuttle. She goes, can you take some pictures of me?

• 3:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  I was shocked. Already late. I need more time.

• 3:50Rayna Greenberg?

  Best photos of the trip?

• 3:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's the best. I looked, it's the best pictures I took that whole trip. Yeah, I, I think we gotta get going. You were the bride in that moment.

• 3:58Rayna Greenberg?

  I, and also.

• 3:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  You were like, I'm late, but can you take some photos of me?

• 4:00Rayna Greenberg?

  Also, I like prolonged it by not having you take the initial set of photos. I had somebody else take them, which is like 15 feet of floor. And then I had to make you retake that.

• 4:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  I cannot. We, like I mentioned, we went to that winery last weekend and someone took a group photo of us. Like, why is it the whole ground? I feel like this is coming from my top slot of people with speakerphone in public is people taking photos that's all ground.

• 4:22Rayna Greenberg?

  Actually, I will talk about this forever. People that decide to put it on point five. I'm like, I'm thin enough. I don't need you to make me look thinner or more far away. I don't need you to make my body look like. That don't change the aspect. Don't do anything. Do what I told you.

• 4:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  The framing. Great. I wanted this gravel. I wanted the gravel to be the bottom half of the photo and our heads to be at the top. It is, it's beautiful, bright blue sky, but no, I love the gravel.

• 4:46Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. And some days I don't have a face that's built for closeups and they're like, what I'm gonna do is zoom in and put it on portrait. I just, I feel that I'm traumatized.

• 4:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  With portrait. I've been hitting you with the portrait.

• 4:56Rayna Greenberg?

  But you know how to, Ashley, I can trust you. I can't trust other people.

• 4:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  You guys, I take so much pride in taking Rina's photos. And she took one of me in France that was take one and that was the shot. It's on the grid.

• 5:07Rayna Greenberg?

  One shot. First shot, perfect shot. But also like you just, you have a body that's made for one shot. You know, like you just never know with my body. I look different in every photo. I think I look great. I'm proud of me. But like, I look like a different person in every photo. I think that people look at photos themselves and they're like, oh no, it's like, somebody could have changed the angle of that photo and you would have looked totally different. It's just like not a good view of like how you really look. Cameras.

• 5:30Ashley Hesseltine?

  Photo genetics.

• 5:31Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. Okay, we'll thank our partners and then we'll just jump right into it. Thank you to Bloom. Get 20% off your first order at bloomnu.com with code GGE.

• 5:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  And thank you to Revolve. Get 15% off your first order at revolve.com/GGE with code GGE. And thank you to Goodwipes. Get a free pack at goodwipes.com/GGE. So if you guys think I look a little tired, it's because I was up all night listening to my neighbor in the hotel get the daylights fucked out of her.

• 6:02Rayna Greenberg?

  You are so lucky.

• 6:03Ashley Hesseltine?

  Rada.

• 6:04Rayna Greenberg?

  You are so lucky.

• 6:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  So I typically stay over in the Meatpacking District at the Standard, but I want to stay in Williamsburg because I have never spent the night there.

• 6:18Ashley Hesseltine?

  Ashley lived in New York for like a decade. She keeps explaining Brooklyn to me. So I guess, yeah, like two nights ago, I was like, I've never spent the night in Brooklyn. Like, I don't think I ever slept out with a guy. Like, they probably came to my place. I only lived in the East Village.

• 6:32Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 6:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, maybe in my 20, I don't know. So, I'm staying in Williamsburg because I want to get a feel for the neighborhood because that's where I think I want to live. So, I'm staying at the Arlo. Nice hotel, which is the Williamsburg Hotel where we took our first photos. So, our very first cover art, our very first photo shoot, Jeremy took these photos of us. It was our very first photo shoot with all the food and everything. If you guys know, you know. And now, it's the Arlo. The walls are thin. So, last night, I hear like a screaming. I thought it was a child at first, then I thought it was a dog screaming. Then I opened my door a little bit. It's, the way it's set up is I'm kind of in this little hallway and I'm 401 and 402 was right across from me, really close. But this woman is screaming, having sex, but I thought she was fucking in the hallway, Raina.

• 7:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  I was like, she's in, she's in the stairwell. She's in this room.

• 7:18Rayna Greenberg?

  Also, her noises sound a lot like my noises, if you're curious, what my noises sound like.

• 7:22Ashley Hesseltine?

  So, I just opened the door and I just hit record on my phone. So, Raina could hear it.

• 7:28Rayna Greenberg?

  Like a normal person.

• 7:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  I think it would be inappropriate to play it on the podcast. I wish we could.

• 7:32Rayna Greenberg?

  I thought about it this morning. I mean, I think it would have been appropriate. So, the first inappropriateness would have been to not record it. So, thank you for recording it. But I did think about playing it on the podcast and I thought like, would that be okay?

• 7:45Ashley Hesseltine?

  I sent it, I sent it to Anna Royzman because she was like, how's the Arlo? And I thought, all I did was send her the video. I said, the walls are thin.

• 7:51Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, here's the only reason why I wouldn't want to play it. The only reason is that if somehow she was having an affair and like her partner like tracked this back to her being at the Arlo in this room.

• 8:03Ashley Hesseltine?

  And heard her voice.

• 8:04Rayna Greenberg?

  In that room, oh, also her voice. Well, that voice sounded like my voice, sounded like a lot of voices.

• 8:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  I wanted to ask you that. Do you think your partner, or whoever, me, someone who knows you really well, could pick out your orgasm scream?

• 8:17Rayna Greenberg?

  So, I was thinking about this because I picked up my nephew from daycare the other day.

• 8:21Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally. It's always when I think about my.

• 8:22Rayna Greenberg?

  Like, the connection. So, Adriana and I went to pick him up from like two-year-old, like whatever it is, daycare. And the kids that were saying like, mommy, like. I could recognize the little kids' voices, like crying or yelling mommy, like a one-year-old. Like, I could recognize it. Because I just thought all babies sound the same at one years old, don't you? But they don't.

• 8:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, oh, yeah, and like, I guess, same with like, similar dog breeds, their barks could sound like, could I pick a Zul's bark out?

• 8:49Rayna Greenberg?

  Do you think you could?

• 8:50Ashley Hesseltine?

  I think so, but I could be wrong.

• 8:51Rayna Greenberg?

  Like his register?

• 8:52Ashley Hesseltine?

  You could be wrong.

• 8:53Rayna Greenberg?

  I think orgasm sounds are a little closer together. It sounded like a white woman. So anyways, the reason why I want to play is just I wouldn't want us to throw her in the bus.

• 9:03Ashley Hesseltine?

  We would get dragged for that, but I wanted to ask you, so hearing a woman have sex. I was slightly, and they went twice within an hour. It was slightly annoying because I was just trying to sleep, but I was not really bothered by it. I did not hear the other person at all. I guess it could have been another woman, but-

• 9:20Rayna Greenberg?

  Men kind of grunt, their registers lower.

• 9:22Ashley Hesseltine?

  If I hear a man having sex, I'm calling the cops. I've been violated.

• 9:26Rayna Greenberg?

  Wait, you're so right. You never hear men.

• 9:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, no, no, 311, I have a noise complaint. I don't want to hear a man grunting, having sex, whatever. So it was really one-sided. A woman, I might grab my vibrator. I mean, it was pretty hot, and I was like, I think most women making those sounds is pretty hot. Like, I, I'm trying to remember, there was one time, Shashank and I were in Malibu for his birthday, and the woman, we could hear her, like, climaxing, and it wasn't hot for whatever reason. I just didn't like her voice or something, but this was, was pretty good.

• 9:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Wait, what's your question? Do I think I could identify it?

• 9:58Ashley Hesseltine?

  Sorry, do you really only want to hear women having sex?

• 10:01Rayna Greenberg?

  Um, okay, I'm glad you asked. I mean, my whole life, I've pretty much deferred to lesbian porn, like, since I was really young. When I do hear somebody having sex in a hotel, like, I will masturbate to it. Like, I think it's really sexy.

• 10:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  I did feel a little tingle.

• 10:15Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, it's like, really sexy to me. I also like a little bit of exhibitionism. Like, sometimes when I masturbate, I'll fantasize that somebody's watching me.

• 10:22Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally.

• 10:23Rayna Greenberg?

  Or that somebody can, like, hear me, and I like, also, if I'm having sex in a hotel, I'm turned on by the thought that, like, somebody in the other rooms could hear me. And, like, I was going into my hotel in Rome, and this couple at the same time walked into the room right next to me, and they were like, "Don't do anything, we can hear." And I was like, "You guys could do something, I could hear."

• 10:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  That sounds like you guys are about to have a threesome.

• 10:41Rayna Greenberg?

  It was funny, because they were, like, older, too.

• 10:43Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's how it is, I feel like. It's giving, like, Samantha Jones when she was gonna have that threesome with that couple.

• 10:48Rayna Greenberg?

  That, he said it, and the wife just kind of, like, giggled, and I was like-

• 10:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  They were propositioning you.

• 10:52Rayna Greenberg?

  Damn it, it was the middle of the day, it was like 11-

• 10:54Ashley Hesseltine?

  Why do you go to Rome, like, every week? You need to be having threesomes.

• 10:57Rayna Greenberg?

  It was like 11 in the morning. It was not 3 sometime. It's not done. You get afternoons at least. But yes, I it like really turns me on. I do only want to hear a woman having sex. I guess I've never thought about it, but I don't want to hear a man grunting.

• 11:12Ashley Hesseltine?

  So this is also what I want to talk to you about is hearing versus seeing. I am not telling Shashank about this because I don't want him to think about it and not want to fuck me tomorrow. So he's coming in town. I think he

• 11:25Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, you don't want him to get his head about it.

• 11:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't, but he's

• 11:28Rayna Greenberg?

  Cause he listens to the podcast. He will find out.

• 11:30Ashley Hesseltine?

  He'll find out, but it'll be this will be next week. He's coming in tonight.

• 11:33Rayna Greenberg?

  Totally.

• 11:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  He's not super shy about it. Like we've had times in hotels, even the first time we had sex here in New York in the standard in the East Village. We felt like people could see in like, we find that kind of hot too. Again, like there's a line. We are not exhibitionist by any stretch. But we've been in situations where we thought someone might be able to see and it I do think it turns us on a little bit. We're not bothered by it. But something about hearing someone on the other side of the wall, I feel more in my head about it too. I don't know why. Cause why?

• 11:59Rayna Greenberg?

  That somebody can hear you.

• 12:01Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, like on the other side of the wall. I don't know why, like seeing me would be like less private. But from afar, like something about, I don't want that woman to like hear me tonight or something. And I don't think Shashank would like, I think he'd be in his head about it too. It's interesting.

• 12:17Rayna Greenberg?

  I agree with you. It just feels like when I'm aware that somebody's on the other side of the wall, listening to me.

• 12:22Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes.

• 12:22Rayna Greenberg?

  It feels like a little more intimate than if somebody's watching me, which is just porn.

• 12:26Ashley Hesseltine?

  See them in the hallway.

• 12:28Rayna Greenberg?

  Yes.

• 12:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  Like I think if someone from across the street in a high rise in New York City was like, I saw Ashley get her cheeks clapped. I'd be like, yeah, you did.

• 12:36Rayna Greenberg?

  Uh huh.

• 12:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  But if they were like, I heard her moaning on the other side of the wall. I'd be like, ew, stop.

• 12:40Rayna Greenberg?

  There's something more intimate about it. I can't put my finger on it. It's just like, he hearing my cum sounds is like crazy to me.

• 12:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  Right, like you can look at my naked body, but I don't want you hearing me.

• 12:53Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, so here's the thing. Okay, remember like my ex and I were in Miami and you and I ended up on the same floor and my ex was there for a couple of days. He was only there for sex purposes. That's what I wanted him there for. And I was just like, I don't want Ashley to hear us having sex, but I'll send you nudes. I send all my friends nudes all the time. Megan and I were on a trip once, sharing the same room and I was like, I have to send this guy nudes. And she sat there on her laptop working while I took photos of my tits for this guy to jerk off to. Like, I would much rather you see my naked body.

• 13:22Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 13:23Rayna Greenberg?

  Than hear me coming.

• 13:24Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, and because I've seen it.

• 13:26Rayna Greenberg?

  Right.

• 13:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't know. I'm trying to think if I walked by a hotel and you were like bent over and getting fucked by that guy. If I would have been like, huh, I think I would have been like, huh, and kept it moving, but I don't think I would have been like, ew, stop. Like if I would have heard you, like Raina, I'm telling you, I feel like if I heard you having sex through a hotel wall, I would bang on the wall, like, stop it. This is not good for the friendship.

• 13:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, but I wonder if like you and I, like, it's like here my sister have sex, like it's different, like, I don't, I, there's none, I have no good friends I want to listen to and have sex. We do have those one friends that you listen to have sex.

• 13:58Ashley Hesseltine?

  In the Hamptons?

• 13:59Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 13:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, that was, again, just her.

• 14:01Rayna Greenberg?

  Just her.

• 14:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  She's very hot.

• 14:03Rayna Greenberg?

  That might be the hottest person I've ever seen.

• 14:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  Got up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and heard a little something and then got closer and put my ear, I grabbed a glass from the kitchen and put, put it up to my ear.

• 14:13Rayna Greenberg?

  As someone who also had sex with him kind of recently, um, I understand it. I understand those moans.

• 14:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  I just feel like if you were overhearing a couple have sex, like, as a woman, I think a lot of us women feel the same way. You guys let us know in the comments. You're hearing her and you're like, okay, I'm kind of turned on by this. And then if you heard him like come and do like a

• 14:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  like a, or like a long cum sound, you've experienced a longcomer, like, it take me right out of it.

• 14:39Rayna Greenberg?

  Um, even, you know, I really like phone sex a lot and I like video phone sex and I like jerk off videos. I don't really want to heavy breathing is pretty much is all I want to hear. And like, I'm the one having phone sex with that person.

• 14:54Ashley Hesseltine?

  Like if I heard a guy's dirty talk, I would kill myself, like a south side of my house.

• 14:59Rayna Greenberg?

  I don't, if I heard a guy's dirty talk, I might like that.

• 15:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  I just feel like, ew, I don't even know him. Like, like, I just want to hear her.

• 15:06Rayna Greenberg?

  It's the moaning and the cum sounds of somebody I'm not having sex with that I don't want to hear.

• 15:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  And like a

• 15:12Ashley Hesseltine?

  like, you know, their breath kind of catches.

• 15:15Rayna Greenberg?

  A lot of guys are silent comers, though, and you don't really have to worry about it. Okay, but in general, like, I've been thinking about this because, I mean, you're in a hotel, which is fine. Like, you're gonna check out of the hotel, you're probably never gonna see the people again, whatever. But like, I haven't lived in an apartment building in kind of a long time, and I forgot that, like,

• 15:31Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 15:32Rayna Greenberg?

  People, a lot of people, there's 500 apartments in my building. People are on the other side of the door.

• 15:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  I know, I know.

• 15:38Rayna Greenberg?

  Like, how, well, they're far from your bedroom. Yeah, but like, I, sex has no, has no place. You could have sex in the living room. Well, I do have a white couch, so I probably won't have sex.

• 15:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  I'm just trying to, I don't, how far was the next door down? Like, I have people on both sides. I don't, I think if you were having sex in your bedroom, people walking by the door couldn't hear it.

• 15:59Rayna Greenberg?

  Maybe.

• 16:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  Also, I have a lot of little kids on my floor.

• 16:03Rayna Greenberg?

  A lot.

• 16:03Ashley Hesseltine?

  Like, you can hear them, they can hear you.

• 16:05Rayna Greenberg?

  That's what I'm saying, like, so when I walked down the hallway, I can hear people in the other apartments. Like, if they're right by the door, I can hear, like, people talking. So people can hear you, and I just, I forgot, like, are these kids gonna hear my cuss sounds?

• 16:17Ashley Hesseltine?

  I know, it really is so crazy. I saw this apartment that I really love, that I feel like if we make the move, which I'm still just really can't decide, but this would probably be the one, there's just a lot of things about it I love. The ceiling is concrete. It's incredible. She was like, you will never hear someone above you.

• 16:37Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 16:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  And it's, the way it's set up is kind of weird. It's over, it's two floors, it's a lower floor, and I could hear someone in the hallway, there's the entrance, it's not important. Anyway, she was just like, you can hear this guy now, you can hear, he's like, working on something in the gym. And then, it was pretty loud, she shut the door, couldn't even hear a peep. Like, they have designed this building to be so quiet. The concrete, like, floors, ceilings. Like, I remember living below a family in my last apartment in New York, and I could hear the kid doing everything. Like, everything the kid played with, like, I'd hear stuff dropping on the floor, he had, like, a little play piano. I could hear fucking everything.

• 17:11Rayna Greenberg?

  I just am so confused, like, how people build buildings like this. I don't hear anybody in my building. If I'm walking down the hall, I can kind of hear people, but like, above, below. My building's really old, it's like 150 years old, maybe more than that. Actually, it was built in like 1889 or some shit.

• 17:23Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, it's historic.

• 17:23Rayna Greenberg?

  It's a historic building. I don't hear anybody, and that's an old building. Like, I don't know, what are we doing with these buildings?

• 17:31Ashley Hesseltine?

  The doors are so close together, it's hard to describe. There's basically the hallway, there's little kind of alcoves, and then that's two rooms. And otherwise, it makes the room, like, really quiet. But me and this girl, like, if we're both, like, having sex at the same ti- I don't- I might, I might have to front desk just when she's checking out, just so I know. Cause if she's there tonight, tomorrow night, she's going all night. They have some stamina, whatever they're doing in there. But then for a minute, I was like, is this like a one night thing? Cause it sounded crazy.

• 18:01Rayna Greenberg?

  I don't know. Like in the beginning of a relationship or one year long distance, you will. I mean, the way that Kane and I would fuck, the first time we

• 18:09Rayna Greenberg?

  throwback.

• 18:11Rayna Greenberg?

  The first time we, the first date we had, we went back to a hotel. We fucked four times and we were like that for a long time. So it's just early on, you know, no kids, vacation energy.

• 18:21Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 18:22Rayna Greenberg?

  But I really think for the apartment, like when I think back to old apartments I've had and yours, we never heard anybody. I've never heard anybody having sex in like when I was walking down the hallway.

• 18:30Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes.

• 18:31Rayna Greenberg?

  Somewhere I lived.

• 18:31Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, in my first apartment here, no one lived on the hall.

• 18:34Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 18:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  It was just me and a bunch of caution tape and corpse, Mitch McConnell's corpse. But my second one, you're right. I never heard it. But it's weird cause I'm like, were the parents upstairs never fucking? Cause I could hear the kid.

• 18:46Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, that's true. Yeah, probably not.

• 18:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay. Well, if you guys let us know in the comments, all the things, would you rather be heard or seen? Would you rather hear a man or a woman? We love you guys weighing in and can I just say, I love like seeing the comments again. Randy and I don't sit in these comment sections all day, but we'll glance here and there. We want to engage with you guys. I've been seeing some more people clap back and I fucking love it.

• 19:06Rayna Greenberg?

  Clap back at each other about us?

• 19:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. Like if someone says some shit, someone claps right back. Someone today I saw on the snack, someone said something, they didn't like the way we um, talked about the diarrhea outbreak. And someone clapped back, it's not CNN. They did fine. It's not CNN. They did fine. Yeah. Talking about diarrhea, like we're not health reporters. Someone said something else. They were like, stop being parasocial, let them live. Like I was just like, okay, like guys, feel free all the time. Like again, we know when people fighting, but if someone says some shit, again, don't start no shit, won't be no shit. You start some shit, let someone else get in there and defend us on our behalf.

• 19:40Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm glad that you brought this up because I have been like wanting to say this for a long time and I forgot to. When people publicly comment stuff on the internet, you can clap back at them and go back and forth. And we did not talk about this in the snack weeks ago, but the season three of America's Sweethearts Dallas Cowboys. They were talking about all the hate those girls get. They blocked out those people's handles that were commenting on them. You should put those people's handles online with their whole chest.

• 20:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  Thank you. Yes. Like you made this choice.

• 20:03Rayna Greenberg?

  I just, you know, you publicly comment and talk shit on people, you get what you get.

• 20:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, exactly. Don't start no shit, won't be no shit. Okay, well, we have Stassi today. So excited to have her.

• 20:13Rayna Greenberg?

  You guys love her so. I mean, we've had her before and I just love this episode so much.

• 20:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  She's so great. You guys are gonna love her new show. So we will get into it with her, but just gonna talk about our partners and telling you guys about Revolve. Oh, my gosh. I had so I revolve stuff delivered to the hotel because I was like,

• 20:27Rayna Greenberg?

  You always do it.

• 20:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  I am insistent on wearing like the long short look this week and I didn't have any. So I ordered two pairs. These are Veronica Beard. I'm obsessed with these.

• 20:36Rayna Greenberg?

  Yes, love.

• 20:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  These are such a good pair. They have such incredible brands on Revolve. We shop so much Revolve. I mean, everything, everything we wore on our last vacation.

• 20:43Rayna Greenberg?

  Also, it's been like so hot in New York. It's been like a million degrees. And so I've been like, I just need new athleisure stuff. And so I just like hopped on Revolve and I typed in like just athleisure wear and like for summer and I like they're like shops.

• 20:54Ashley Hesseltine?

  You guys can type in anything.

• 20:55Rayna Greenberg?

  Literally.

• 20:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  I wrote South of France.

• 20:57Rayna Greenberg?

  Test them.

• 20:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  Just, yes, they got you. They just are the effortless answer for everything. Like we mentioned, nights out, events, travel, last minute summer plans. Again, that two day free shipping makes it super easy, super easy returns. We're just obsessed with everything. Get your dresses, your swimwear. I think the most of my swimsuits are from Revolve, if not all. I mean, we're just obsessed and they curate everything like we mentioned in these collections online and it does feel really curated. There's so much on there, but it doesn't feel chaotic. So many different brands. We love the Revolve brands. We love Super Down and Lovers and Friends. And then they have your Alice and Olivia, your Veronica Beard. They really have it all for every occasion. So again, these are the shorts I'm wearing today. I don't even know what this

• 21:40Ashley Hesseltine?

  tank is, but I'm sure it's like from Revolve too. So whether it's a big night out, a wedding, a summer trip, or you just need something last minute that actually works, Revolve always has it. Go to revolve.com/gge to shop our faves and use code GGE for 15% off your first order. Fast shipping, easy returns. It just makes everything easier. That's revolve.com/gge. You can shop our faves and get 15% off your first order. Offer ends August 10th, so don't miss out.

• 22:04Rayna Greenberg?

  And, okay, you know, it's really hot outside. As I said, you know what's hot, you guys? Drinking water. Drink water, get hot. Okay, I just learned, I just learned about drinking water.

• 22:14Rayna Greenberg?

  And apparently it makes you hot. And Bloom's Daily Hydration Sticks contain essential electrolytes plus 5 grams of protein and collagen to support protein goals and keep you glowing all summer long. The strawberry lemonade and rocket blast flavors taste incredible and you can actually look forward to hitting your daily hydration and protein goals. So you just take one stick, you put it in some water. It tastes great. They have different flavors, as I mentioned, and it's hard for me to remember to drink water, you guys. It's just been a struggle my whole life. And if I know that I'm gonna get a little collagen, a little protein, keep me hydrated, it's just like so important this summer, just because like it's so hot out and it's good for your skin. It's good for your body. Do something good for your body. So it tastes great. It's good for you. It's easy to incorporate into your routine. It fits nicely into your cabinet. I just have it there with like all my little things I do for my body every day. And right

• 22:57Rayna Greenberg?

  now Bloom is offering their best offer anywhere, exclusive for our listeners. Use code GGE for 20% off your first order at bloomnu.com. That's B-L-O-O-M-N-U.com and enter the code GGE to get hot and hydrated.

• 23:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, and good wipes. Raina was like, you're doing this one because you are obsessed with your butt health. So guys, I mean, it's always something going on back there. But this is really, we have these in every single bathroom in our house, like multiple scents. They are incredible. They're wipes that you use in the bathroom. They're larger than other wipes. Like you gotta get a hand on it, you know? So they smell amazing. They're really soft. They are truly flushable and it's plant-based material. So they're gonna feel much better on your skin than other brands, especially toilet paper. So they're really soft and gentle on the skin and they are durable. You're not gonna like use it and rip a hole in it and then you gotta start fresh. So they really, yeah, it's chaotic. They make you feel so much cleaner, fresher than toilet paper. And they're really easy just to keep in the bathroom,

• 23:55Ashley Hesseltine?

  carry a pack with you if you want to travel with them. They have amazing scents. I love the lavender. They have a rose water, a shea cocoa, botanical bliss. And we're just such big fans of these. Keep them in your bathroom, bring them with you. They're great for a quick cleanup. I mean, they're obviously made for your butt, but I don't put them on my pits. I'll do, I've been just using these all the time.

• 24:16Rayna Greenberg?

  Wiping down your whole body.

• 24:17Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, seriously, it's summer. It's just like, I've already showered today, but I don't feel fresh. I gotta do something. So you guys can get them at Target, Amazon, Walmart. Good wipes wants your booty to have a sensational summer. Buy any two packs of good wipes at your favorite retailer, text them your receipt and get reimbursed almost immediately for one of them. For more details, head to goodwipes.com/gge. Again, that's goodwipes.com/gge to snag a free pack of good wipes and let's get into it.

• 24:44Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, guys, we are very excited to welcome our guest today. She is one of reality TV's most iconic personalities. She is the star of Vanderpump Rules, a podcast host, a reality TV reunion host, a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model, a New York Times bestselling author of three books, Next Level Basic, Off With My Head, and You Can't Have It All. Now she's back on our screens with a new reality TV series, House of Stassi. Please welcome to the show, Stassi Schroeder.

• 25:08Speaker 02

  Thank you, guys. You just made me feel so legit.

• 25:12Rayna Greenberg?

  You are legit. It's crazy.

• 25:13Speaker 02

  I don't know, I'm like so in the bubble of my brain that I don't think I can see myself from the outside. Like, I talk to Taylor Strecker about this all the time, like where I'm like, I can't see myself from the outside. She's like, you don't get how cool and big you are. I'm like, I don't think I do, but like, that made me sound...

• 25:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  I think that's humility. That's good.

• 25:34Speaker 02

  Yeah. You know what I think it is? I think it's like, I didn't have overnight success.

• 25:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  Also good.

• 25:39Speaker 02

  I've been working at this since I was like 16. That's when I was on my first reality show.

• 25:43Ashley Hesseltine?

  Wait, what? I don't know this. What is this?

• 25:46Speaker 02

  Great.

• 25:48Speaker 02

  I do this to myself all the time.

• 25:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  What?

• 25:50Speaker 02

  I was on The Amazing Race.

• 25:52Ashley Hesseltine?

  I did know this.

• 25:53Speaker 02

  With my family.

• 25:54Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 25:54Speaker 02

  Pre chin implant.

• 25:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 25:56Speaker 02

  Emo-ish air like phase.

• 25:58Ashley Hesseltine?

  Black hair.

• 25:59Speaker 02

  Black hair, yeah.

• 25:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  Who of your family?

• 26:01Speaker 02

  They did a family addition.

• 26:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 26:03Speaker 02

  My dad, my stepmom, and my...

• 26:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  The whole family.

• 26:05Speaker 02

  One of my brothers. Yeah. They only did the family addition one time.

• 26:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 26:08Speaker 02

  So I got like a little taste of like fame or whatever that was back then. Then like I did another reality show, a little bit more than like, you know.

• 26:18Ashley Hesseltine?

  What was that one?

• 26:20Rayna Greenberg?

  Stassi, you're bringing them up.

• 26:21Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, this is on you.

• 26:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know it is.

• 26:24Ashley Hesseltine?

  Sounds like you want to talk about it.

• 26:27Speaker 02

  Why am I so weird?

• 26:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, I love it.

• 26:29Speaker 02

  That one was called Queen Bees. It was like rehabilitating Mean Girls.

• 26:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  Is it so odd?

• 26:34Rayna Greenberg?

  Did somebody nominate you or did you nominate yourself?

• 26:37Speaker 02

  No, it's okay. I was scout. Like, this is the thing. The person who had cast me on Amazing Race was like-

• 26:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  Is this show still up?

• 26:43Speaker 02

  It was like so fake, you guys.

• 26:44Ashley Hesseltine?

  Can you find it on YouTube?

• 26:45Speaker 02

  That was the fakest thing we have ever. It was, and it was like a mindfuck.

• 26:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  Could we revamp the show? Let's just talk to Hulu.

• 26:53Speaker 02

  But, so because of that, okay, so because like then Vanderpump Rules happened, I think everything's just been such a slow. I still don't know if I've like hit the success mark yet. You know what I mean? There was no overnight success.

• 27:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  I think that's better. And I think that's longer lasting and it's like a sustainable career. Like, I think when people get truly get famous overnight, it's always, they don't know how to handle it and I don't think it's long lasting.

• 27:18Speaker 02

  They turn into weirdos.

• 27:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 27:20Speaker 02

  I do notice that like the people that I meet who like had success really quickly, they, they kind of just like have an attitude about them.

• 27:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes.

• 27:28Speaker 02

  They're just, they're wary of everyone. And like, trust, I can be socially uncomfortable pretty often, okay? But I have beta blockers for that. But like people with overnight success, they're just like, they're a little weird.

• 27:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  When you ask like a publicist who the hardest clients are to work with, my friends that are publicists always say people that got like overnight-

• 27:47Speaker 02

  Overnight success? I'm getting nods. I'm getting nods.

• 27:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  I love nothing more than like a long career. Like the people I respect, like musically and even in like radio, like someone like a Howard Stern, like that is like impressive to me is like long, sustainable careers. And people who get famous overnight also probably worry that they're gonna lose it and they have to grab everything all at once.

• 28:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  You've been able to like build all these things over time. It's like really impressive.

• 28:10Speaker 02

  Well, I appreciate that. I still worry that I'm gonna lose it. And I, you know, there might come a time where I do again.

• 28:17Ashley Hesseltine?

  Sure.

• 28:17Speaker 02

  And then I'll just like build that shit back up.

• 28:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  But that's a valid fear, but like you did put in the work. Like you wrote the first book while you were on Vanderpump. And then you were off Vanderpump and you were like, I'm gonna keep writing books and I'm gonna tour and I'm gonna keep doing the podcast. And it's just, it's impressive to have that like resilience and keep going.

• 28:32Speaker 02

  You know, it's like, I joke that I'm like, kind of like a roach. It's like you can't like, I will survive. Like I will, no matter what. So like, if I have a career decline, I'll figure that shit out.

• 28:44Ashley Hesseltine?

  Do you talk to your daughter and son about that?

• 28:47Speaker 02

  About career declines? Not yet.

• 28:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  Just about like resilience. About being a cockroach.

• 28:54Speaker 02

  Um, you know, I haven't had that, that talk with them, but that is something when people are like, what do you want for your children? I want them to be happy and I want them to be survivors. Like I want them to be able to like withstand like any storm and like just know that they can like find a way out of it.

• 29:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally. Of all the things you do, do you rank them? No, I'm kidding. But do you?

• 29:17Speaker 02

  I'll rank them.

• 29:18Ashley Hesseltine?

  I want to know, like, do you get different types of joy and inspiration from the different things? Like, what do you like the most? What do you hate the most?

• 29:26Speaker 02

  So are we talking about just in terms of like working career?

• 29:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  Podcasting, reality TV, books. Touring and being a mom. Rank that also. No, I'm kidding.

• 29:36Speaker 02

  Okay. Can we take being a mom out of it? Like, it's like so fucked up.

• 29:40Ashley Hesseltine?

  Because it's not your number one?

• 29:44Speaker 02

  Um, it's the most rewarding, but it's the hardest. It's the hardest.

• 29:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, the professional stuff.

• 29:49Speaker 02

  The professional stuff. I would say at the bottom, I think, and I'm saying this because I'm like really over it right now. I'm like out of this like phase for, for the moment is writing books. It's very hard.

• 30:01Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 30:02Speaker 02

  It is really hard to sit down and just like force yourself to like sit and type. It is, it's a lot.

• 30:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 30:11Speaker 02

  And I really have to have something to say when I'm doing it. And luckily, like those three books, I felt that creative urge for each one of them. And I was like, I have something to say. I have so much to say. I have like, I'm like bursting with it, but it still is like a fucking boring ass process to like do it. Everyone keeps asking me, not everyone, but a lot of people ask me, are you going to write a fourth book? And I'm like, not anytime soon. I have no opinions or stories or anything to say. Like I need way more life experience. I just like put out three books where I'm like, I had a lot of content there. Like, what the fuck? Let me be mute now. Like, I don't have anything of substance.

• 30:51Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, you have to go and live. I mean, I think all three books kind of fell at a time in your life where you're like, I have a life experience I can be authoritative on.

• 30:58Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 30:58Rayna Greenberg?

  And now you have to go live.

• 30:59Speaker 02

  Yes. So I would say that's last right now.

• 31:02Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 31:03Speaker 02

  Second to last is touring. It's fun, but it's like you're away from your family. You can't be doing anything else. Like, you have to just be flying around the country. Like, that's a lot. So like, I don't like something that just like, takes me away from all the other opportunities that I'm having. I like to be able to like, do a little bit of everything. Um, then I would say podcasting because I can do it from home and I just like love talking, especially like to Taylor.

• 31:29Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 31:29Speaker 02

  You know, but number one, like the love of my life in terms of work is reality TV. I fucking love it.

• 31:37Rayna Greenberg?

  Mm hmm.

• 31:37Speaker 02

  Like.

• 31:37Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 31:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:38Rayna Greenberg?

  Then I want to talk to you about it. So like, I mean Vanderpump Rules, I say this on the show all the time. I think it's the greatest reality show that was ever created.

• 31:44Speaker 02

  It might be.

• 31:45Rayna Greenberg?

  And you guys were actually friends, actually dating, actually living with each other. Like, you can't manufacture that. You can't pay for it. It's not like making the band. Like, people try to recreate it and you can't create that magic. So I think it's the best reality show that's ever existed. But like, reality TV has really changed since you were on TV.

• 32:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:03Rayna Greenberg?

  So like, how do you feel like it's changed? In a good way, a bad way? Are you excited about it?

• 32:07Speaker 02

  Um, I think that back then, all we had to go on was like, uh, The Hills, Project Runway, America's Next Top Model. Do you know what I mean? There wasn't like that much. I think Jersey Shore, but I never watched that. So like, we didn't know a lot about reality TV. There wasn't like so much out there. So I think back then, there was no ulterior motives. Like, you know what I mean? It was just like,

• 32:34Rayna Greenberg?

  It's pure.

• 32:35Speaker 02

  We are trying to be successful in Hollywood. We don't have brands or anything like that that we need to protect. We're just like trying to like get the next gig. You know, and Vanderpump Rules was like our next gig.

• 32:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 32:47Speaker 02

  So whereas like now, there with like The Bachelor and every show that's out there, there's a trillion. People are like, you're here to build a brand, which you should be. If you're doing a reality TV show, you should be building a brand. But then that makes for like inauthentic scenes. People are scared to like really be themselves. And so like, everyone is just like censoring themselves or, or they have examples of like previous shows of who they want to be. They want to be like the,

• 33:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  You?

• 33:14Speaker 02

  Kristin Cavallari, fine, me, the sass-est Schroeder of like their own show or whatnot. Like, the Ariana Maddox of like, you know, their show.

• 33:23Ashley Hesseltine?

  Right. Well, you can feel that too, when someone's trying to have that moment, even like on Love is Blind or something, like at the altar, they're trying to do this baddie thing and you're like, it's been done. And you could feel people trying to emulate someone else.

• 33:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, people forget that like what makes really good reality TV is just truly being who you are because there is no one like you, you know, as cheesy as it sounds, like that's the best shot you have at success. It's just like really tapping in to who you innately are.

• 33:48Rayna Greenberg?

  So like when Vanderpump was on, Instagram was in its infancy, there was no TikTok. I mean, there wasn't this like feedback loop that everybody gets today.

• 33:56Speaker 02

  Oh my god, yeah.

• 33:57Rayna Greenberg?

  So like, you guys-

• 33:58Ashley Hesseltine?

  What year? What did it's?

• 34:00Speaker 02

  2012, 2013, something like that.

• 34:03Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, it was so crazy.

• 34:04Rayna Greenberg?

  So I remember seeing like you guys post an Instagram photo in one scene. I was like, Instagram is like in its infancy.

• 34:09Speaker 02

  I don't think I even posted for Vanderpump Rules. I don't, I, no.

• 34:13Rayna Greenberg?

  Did that change when you guys like legitimately became famous? Like, that show was just like waitresses and bartenders, but then you were like really famous.

• 34:22Speaker 02

  We weren't.

• 34:23Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 34:24Speaker 02

  I didn't feel famous until, um, season five.

• 34:29Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 34:29Speaker 02

  I distinctly remember, I had started my podcast, so I was like a year into like doing it, I think. And I got like all, you know, they were constantly like flying us out to New York first class.

• 34:42Speaker 02

  Gentlemen, it was very exciting. And we were like always-

• 34:45Ashley Hesseltine?

  Flown, gentlemen.

• 34:45Speaker 02

  We were always doing like Watch What Happens Live and like all these press opportunities. And then I was getting flown out to New York because of my podcast.

• 34:52Ashley Hesseltine?

  Which was also early for a podcast.

• 34:54Speaker 02

  That, oh yeah, I was one of the first-

• 34:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes, really.

• 34:57Speaker 02

  One of the first reality people to do a podcast.

• 35:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally.

• 35:00Speaker 02

  And that was like when I was like, oh, I think we're successful. Like they're flying us out here to like do fun shit and putting us up at like nice places. And I had like enough money to like buy Christian Louboutins whenever I felt like it. You know what I mean? And so that's like when I felt famous-ish, but like it took five years to feel that way.

• 35:28Rayna Greenberg?

  It is always the Louboutins.

• 35:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  Louboutins.

• 35:30Rayna Greenberg?

  That was my first big project.

• 35:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  We talked about it on the show.

• 35:33Rayna Greenberg?

  Bought my own Louboutins. I was like, this is it, bitch. We did a whole intro, like, the first time I bought my Louboutins, I was like, I have an announcement, everybody. Yeah, I still only have one pair. They don't fit my feet that great.

• 35:45Speaker 02

  They, you know what? They're so fucking uncomfortable.

• 35:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Fuck those shoes.

• 35:47Speaker 02

  But they're a classic.

• 35:48Rayna Greenberg?

  I know.

• 35:49Speaker 02

  They're a classic.

• 35:49Rayna Greenberg?

  You gotta have a pair. Well, I sold them all on Poshmark, so.

• 35:51Speaker 02

  I don't have them anymore.

• 35:53Rayna Greenberg?

  Fuck these shoes. I have to put socks in them and then blow them dry with a hairdryer to stretch out the leather. I can sometimes wear them for our live shows because I would walk from the side of the stage to the chair and I was like, I'm gonna throw up in these eight steps. This is so bad.

• 36:07Speaker 02

  I can't believe you wore Louboutins on stage.

• 36:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  They're like a humiliation ritual.

• 36:09Rayna Greenberg?

  In a chair.

• 36:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's also so funny to think about The Bachelor early days because those people weren't even trying to get famous, like in Hollywood. They were just trying to find love.

• 36:18Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 36:18Ashley Hesseltine?

  Genuinely.

• 36:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's kind of funny to look back. There's no way to know now if you're on there to really try to find love. You're probably not.

• 36:26Speaker 02

  No.

• 36:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  I love, like, old reality, original reality TV programming.

• 36:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's the best thing you could ever watch. When no one knew, even Jersey Shore, what, the way it was so magical was them not trying to be famous.

• 36:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  They were just trying to go to the beach with their friends.

• 36:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  Jim Tannenbaum.

• 36:43Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, you found love in reality TV. It's interesting that you had this, like, really toxic, years-long, like, storyline with Jax and then...

• 36:50Speaker 02

  My storyline with Jax was not years, years long. It actually is only like the first two years. And people like never actually see us together. And so it's so wild that people are like, Stassi and Jax, so vintage. I don't know if they ever even saw us kiss.

• 37:05Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's so funny.

• 37:06Speaker 02

  Did they?

• 37:07Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's kind of like a Mandela effect.

• 37:10Rayna Greenberg?

  That's what it is, the Britney Spears headset thing.

• 37:12Speaker 02

  We broke up in, like, episode two of the first season.

• 37:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's so funny. But, yeah, people like rewrite history.

• 37:19Rayna Greenberg?

  I guess I think of it because, like, Kristen and all that storyline.

• 37:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, because he was like trying to get me back and I was like entertaining and a little, you know, so like, I guess, you know, there's that, but it wasn't that. Many years. I was on Vanderpump Rules for eight years. That was just two of them.

• 37:34Rayna Greenberg?

  It's so funny. So tell us about House of Stassi.

• 37:37Speaker 02

  So different.

• 37:38Rayna Greenberg?

  And like, as much as you want to share of, is this all your idea and creating it? And like, how did you make this be such a great fit for you, something you'd want to go to work and do every day?

• 37:49Speaker 02

  Listen, you guys, I worked really hard for this. Like this, we've been working on this for over three and a half years. I feel like now, four years. Like, it's been a really long time with two of my best friends, Jenna and Foy, who were producers on Vanderpump Rules. And like, after Vanderpump Rules, we were like, allowed to be friends. Because you know, when you're like, on a reality show, you're not allowed to like, fraternize with the crew and all that stuff. So we got closer after I was off of it, and we created this together. And then partnered with Scout, which is, you know, they have amazing producers there that like, really let us, you know, like, have our vision. And we wanted to just make something that was as authentic as we possibly could make it,

• 38:30Speaker 02

  given the space. And so we make it a point to break the fourth wall and like, acknowledge the show.

• 38:39Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh.

• 38:39Speaker 02

  And what that means, you know, as much as possible, because like, we're not pretending that we're sitting here and this, this isn't a job that we're also doing.

• 38:48Rayna Greenberg?

  Love it.

• 38:48Speaker 02

  You know, like, this is also a job.

• 38:50Rayna Greenberg?

  Was that day one, you were like, that this is the format of the show?

• 38:53Speaker 02

  We always wanted to do that. Yeah. And I thought that was just like, really important. And, you know, it's elevated stylistically. It's just feels like art to me. The music is so different. You know, we have chapters and different ways of like, doing things. And I'm just, I'm really excited about it. It's something different. People are either gonna love it or hate it. They're gonna be like, this is so not what I'm used to. Fuck this show. Or they're gonna be like, this is so not what I'm used to. I love it. No one's done anything like this. So it could go either way, which is really scary, because I'm like, if people hate it, it's like, where do I go from here?

• 39:27Rayna Greenberg?

  I think people are gonna be really amped to see on their screens again. And this is a, like, to see you as like, a wife and a mother, and you had this amazing relationship with Taylor and her wife, Taylor. And to see you guys all together will be like, very different than like, let's fight at a restaurant.

• 39:41Speaker 02

  I mean, there are fights at restaurants.

• 39:44Rayna Greenberg?

  I hope so. So we got invited. It's just a Halloween party, but I was getting married.

• 39:48Speaker 02

  Oh, damn it. The fights were a little tame there. Okay, so they weren't like loud and explosive.

• 39:54Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, we didn't miss anything.

• 39:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's okay. It's okay. Season two, we'll invite you guys to our past events.

• 40:01Rayna Greenberg?

  Anything else you can tell us about the show?

• 40:03Speaker 02

  I like, don't want to like, give away too much. We like, really bear our, our souls. I think people are gonna be surprised when they watch it, be like, she let this air? I think people are gonna be surprised. I think people are gonna be like, wow, if she's an executive producer, I would think she would cut this out. Cause like, I don't look great a lot of the time, but I, I feel like it was just like, really important to show this stage of my life and what was really happening. I feel like the second that I'm like, edit this out, it's like downhill from there.

• 40:37Rayna Greenberg?

  That's interesting.

• 40:38Speaker 02

  You know?

• 40:38Rayna Greenberg?

  That's brave. I mean, it's like, it comes naturally to you. I'm, I'm projecting.

• 40:44Speaker 02

  I'm so, I'm, I'm very much used to it and I'm very much used to like, people having negative comments or opinions or whatever. Like, I'm, I'm, I can handle that. Now I'm like, more so scared for like, the rest of the cast. I'm like, can they handle that?

• 40:59Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 41:00Speaker 02

  Like, that's like how, where I feel like my anxiety and my stress is, is like, holding their hands. You know, throughout this process. But like, for the most part, I feel like they're pretty damn likable. I don't know.

• 41:11Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. Yeah. I mean, Taylor and Taylor are so likable.

• 41:13Speaker 02

  Oh, they're fine.

• 41:14Rayna Greenberg?

  We met Rob and he was super nice and likable. We want to talk to you about working with Bo though, and like, working with your.

• 41:22Speaker 02

  That's a tough one.

• 41:23Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 41:23Speaker 02

  It is. Um, cause we have a podcast together and we've had it for like, four fucking years now. That's a long time. And that gets hard, where I'm just like, you're not doing it right. Or like, you're not telling the story right. And then like, that like, seeps into like, the rest of the day. And so then we gotta like, bounce back from that.

• 41:42Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. I mean, live, work and play together.

• 41:44Speaker 02

  It's hard. It is. But

• 41:46Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 41:46Speaker 02

  We've managed it. And then filming a show together.

• 41:51Speaker 02

  He really brought it. Like I,

• 41:52Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 41:53Speaker 02

  I, you know, I had like drilled it in everybody's head that like, if we're gonna do this, you need to be honest about everything you're thinking and feeling. Okay. There's no sweeping things under the rug. There is no pretending something's different than it is. There's no not talking about an issue. We are talking about everything. This is our one shot. It's like Eminem, Mom's spaghetti. One fucking shot at this. So you guys gotta be open. And I just didn't expect Bo to be so open.

• 42:24Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay. No, I, I love this.

• 42:26Speaker 02

  Maybe be a little less open.

• 42:29Rayna Greenberg?

  Maybe don't they, I, I created a monster.

• 42:31Speaker 02

  No, I was like, can you not? I was like, be open with everybody else, not me.

• 42:35Rayna Greenberg?

  Right. I didn't mean me. Was that me?

• 42:38Speaker 02

  I can't wait.

• 42:38Rayna Greenberg?

  Yes, the kids.

• 42:41Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay. So was that the biggest surprise?

• 42:44Speaker 02

  That was a huge surprise. There were a lot of surprises for me.

• 42:46Rayna Greenberg?

  What did you think? He would just kind of hold back or?

• 42:49Speaker 02

  I guess he saved a lot for the cameras.

• 42:55Speaker 02

  He was like, well, I know we're gonna be filming then. So like, I will save this and not have these conversations with you until like, we're actually doing it, which like, okay, professional. All right. I got it. Um, that was a little hard on me. You know, I think because I was a producer, I thought I would like know everything that was going on. I did not.

• 43:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Interesting. Is that hard for you? Are you a control?

• 43:15Speaker 02

  No, I'm used to that.

• 43:15Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 43:16Speaker 02

  In terms of reality TV, I'm used to it. I just thought I would like overhear things.

• 43:20Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 43:20Speaker 02

  But like, I had made it a point, like day one of filming, I sent like the whole cast a text message being like, just because I've been the general up until now, like I'm no longer your general. Like I'm tapping out. I am now a fellow cast member, your friend.

• 43:34Rayna Greenberg?

  Right.

• 43:34Speaker 02

  Like I don't know about whatever's going on in your stories and your storylines. Like I got us to the point where we are greenlit. Now it's go time and I'm just like one of you. I just thought I would overhear things and I didn't, you know? So I was really.

• 43:49Rayna Greenberg?

  Again, they listened to you.

• 43:50Speaker 02

  I was caught off guard.

• 43:51Rayna Greenberg?

  God damn it.

• 43:52Speaker 02

  By a lot of shit. Yeah.

• 43:53Rayna Greenberg?

  That's so funny. It just kept getting surprised on your own show.

• 43:56Speaker 02

  And I, and if you decide to watch it, you will fully understand.

• 44:00Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 44:00Speaker 02

  But the end of it, yeah.

• 44:01Rayna Greenberg?

  Is this different than the last time you guys, you and your husband were on TV together? Does this feel different?

• 44:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, cuz it was fucking Vanderpump Villa and we got to just like chill out and drink Aperol spritzes.

• 44:10Rayna Greenberg?

  I really am interested though in the, in your marriage and the working together of it all. And how do you guys manage conflict? Or do you have to take breaks sometimes? I mean, truly working and raising children together and it's a lot.

• 44:24Speaker 02

  No, it's a lot. We've gotten used to it.

• 44:26Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 44:26Speaker 02

  But like, yes, there are times even like during the podcast where I'll be like, stop it. I'm like, we're starting this over. I need to go upstairs for a while before we start this over again. Yeah, I need to like go walk away and like, it's hard to like reset your brain to like not be annoyed with your partner. You know, but like you just like gotta do it.

• 44:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 44:45Speaker 02

  And you know, we've been to therapy together. I guess like that was helpful for him. Not me, I don't really like therapy, but.

• 44:53Rayna Greenberg?

  What do you think you do really well? Good friendship, communication, like what?

• 44:58Speaker 02

  I think that we're each other's rocks. Like we know, we, there's a safety with each other where like, I think even after like watching this, this show, you're gonna be like, are they okay? Like, are they okay? But like, we always know we're okay.

• 45:15Rayna Greenberg?

  I love that.

• 45:15Speaker 02

  Like there's nothing that will come between us. We will be okay. So like whatever it is we need to do, we will get there. I guess we just like recover really easily.

• 45:26Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, that's huge. You know, I'm curious, like, I think some couples are really afraid to fight. And like even my brother and my sister-in-law, they've been together 15 years. They have, I think they have the best marriage ever, but my sister-in-law is like, every time we fight, I'm like, this is it? This is the end of the marriage. She's like, nothing has ever happened to make me think that. But every time I think that, and I think people are afraid to fight, so.

• 45:47Speaker 02

  No, fighting, it is scary. So like, I will say that because of Vanderpump Rules, like it's made me more afraid of fighting. Oh, cuz like I by nature, I'm a fighter.

• 45:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 45:57Speaker 02

  Okay, I'm used to that in every relationship. Like that's just like.

• 46:01Rayna Greenberg?

  You're not afraid of conflict.

• 46:03Speaker 02

  That's just like what you do. But because people were like, oh, my gosh, like when they would see a fight on Vanderpump Rules, they'd be like, this must be the end or like something like that. It made me be like, oh, my God, is it? So I have to remind myself a lot of the time, like, no, it is okay to fight because people are so scared of it. And then when they see us fight, their reaction to it is I'm like, you guys, no. This is just like an argument. Even Bo, it feels like Bo will be like, when we had that big fight, I'm like, that was not a big fight. That was a, that was like a discussion where I was like a little bit louder than normal. Okay. Like you don't know what a fight is. Okay.

• 46:40Rayna Greenberg?

  Someone's like, you're screaming. I'm like, excuse, this is, you have never heard me scream.

• 46:44Speaker 02

  Yeah. Which I guess is like, it's kind of fucked up on my part, you know, that like, it has to be like, I don't know, someone pulling me like by the hair for me to like, think it's like a fight or something, but.

• 46:54Rayna Greenberg?

  But it's like in your nature. You're like, I'm comfortable with it. I grew up with it.

• 46:57Speaker 02

  Well, it's like, I don't know. I just like, I'm not afraid of fighting.

• 47:00Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. Well, it sounds like you're not afraid to also mend and manage conflict too. Like.

• 47:05Speaker 02

  I do rebound very quickly.

• 47:07Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, yeah, the recovery time is huge, but you're probably like, if there's a conflict with a friend or your husband or a family member, it sounds like you're willing to, repair it. I don't think you're.

• 47:16Speaker 02

  Yes, but there are also times where I'm a good ghoster.

• 47:19Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 47:22Speaker 02

  You can't put me in a box.

• 47:26Speaker 02

  Sometimes like, you know what, it actually would just be easy to just like avoid this than actually talk about it. And I will, I will just bury it so deep down that I forget it, it happened.

• 47:37Rayna Greenberg?

  It's called balance. Um, I just, I bring it up. I think people are really afraid of conflict and like, what's gonna happen if they bring something up? And I had like, one of my best friends was saying to me the other day, she's having like a pretty serious problem with a friend of hers. And I was like, you're right and she's wrong. And there's no other likes. This is very black and white to me. So just say the sentence, you will be right. This is the easiest fight you will ever have in your life. Just say the words. And she was so terrified to do it. And once she did, she was like, that was so easy. And I was like, I don't know why you were afraid.

• 48:04Speaker 02

  Were the words.

• 48:05Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. What, what do you mean telling her she was wrong?

• 48:07Rayna Greenberg?

  She was going through something in her life and a very close friend of hers just refused to acknowledge it, refused to bring it up, kept talking about herself over and over. And she was like, this is crazy that she is just like on a loop about herself. I'm clearly melting down and she just like, won't talk to me about this. And I was like, just say the words, you are right. I promise you, you are right. She will apologize. And if she doesn't, you got bigger issues in this friendship. But I think people are like terrified of conflict. I mean, Ashley and I aren't, but like, that's been a lifelong. I've had to coach myself into being good at it and be like you where I can say to myself, I'm not going to lose this relationship because I have an argument with somebody.

• 48:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, I'm, I've not scared of conflict at all. I mean, and we've navigated that in our relationship too. Like I used to ruin a dinner. I don't care. It's like, and also that's managing my own anger, huh?

• 48:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm, I'm a dinner ruiner too.

• 48:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  But I had to be like, you can wait, you can take a deep breath and you can bring this up later. But like, I just don't back, it just sometimes it needs to be said.

• 49:05Speaker 02

  Sometimes it needs to be done.

• 49:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 49:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:07Ashley Hesseltine?

  So your kids and being on the show.

• 49:11Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 49:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  How much, like, can you walk us, share as much as you want in terms of?

• 49:15Speaker 02

  Just a little bit. They would like it to be a lot more. Like they love when the cameras are there and they just like call the crew, the people. So like when they leave, they're like, where did the people go? When are the people coming back? But.

• 49:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's really sweet. I'm glad they like the.

• 49:30Speaker 02

  No, they do. But like, they're not like, um, you know, storylines or anything like that.

• 49:34Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 49:35Speaker 02

  They're kind of just like around.

• 49:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 49:37Speaker 02

  I didn't want this to be like about the kids. This is about me. This is about mommy.

• 49:44Ashley Hesseltine?

  You guys are background noise with the people. Okay. I mean, I think that's, that's like, feels like that's the right balance, right?

• 49:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  They're there.

• 49:52Speaker 02

  When they get older, when they're a little bit older and they kind of like have more of an understanding, they will pop in for more scenes if they feel like it, if they want to. But like, right now, it's like, they're in it, but minimal.

• 50:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  Uh huh. Yeah. Your daughter's five?

• 50:08Speaker 02

  She's five.

• 50:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't know how, how much of a storyline could she be?

• 50:11Speaker 02

  I know. It's a, yeah, yeah.

• 50:12Ashley Hesseltine?

  Her love life? Oh my gosh. Are they like?

• 50:16Rayna Greenberg?

  Hams for the camera?

• 50:17Speaker 02

  Like, do they want it?

• 50:18Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 50:18Speaker 02

  Yes, it's really cute.

• 50:20Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, that's really sweet.

• 50:21Speaker 02

  My daughter right now is at theater camp. So I'm, I have to go, I'm gonna go watch her performance later on this afternoon.

• 50:27Rayna Greenberg?

  That's so cute.

• 50:28Speaker 02

  A star is born. It's really cute.

• 50:30Rayna Greenberg?

  I love that. So we want to talk to you a little bit about, you talk a lot about letting go of like perfection and trying to be perfect and even just-

• 50:38Speaker 02

  It's really hard for me, sorry. Like, I trust, okay? It's like not, it's like something I struggle with like constantly.

• 50:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Is it really? Are you a sarcastic? Okay.

• 50:46Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 50:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 50:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:48Rayna Greenberg?

  And then that and also-

• 50:49Speaker 02

  Perfect might not be the right word, just like relinquishing control. I think I'm someone with control issues.

• 50:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, that's why I thought you, when you said like you, stuff was happening you didn't know about, I was wondering if that was hard.

• 51:02Speaker 02

  Well, no, well, so that, for some reason, I think just because of the fact that I'm so used to reality TV.

• 51:07Rayna Greenberg?

  The nature of reality TV, yeah.

• 51:08Speaker 02

  All I know is not having control when it comes to that sort of thing. So like that was easy, but I am controlling in every other aspect of my life. Yeah.

• 51:15Rayna Greenberg?

  How do you manage that? And like, again, this like, did you feel more, I don't know, 10 years ago, this like, you had to be perfect pressure?

• 51:24Speaker 02

  Um.

• 51:25Rayna Greenberg?

  Look perfect, be perfect? Or was it just like, life is messy and this is the reality of?

• 51:29Speaker 02

  No, yeah, life was messy and then that was just the reality. Like, we were just like so broke, like just trying to like survive, you know? That there was like no time to think about image or perfection or a brand or creating something. It was just like, this, yeah, these are our messy lives. I feel more pressure for perfectionism now.

• 51:53Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 51:54Speaker 02

  Even though I'm older and should know better.

• 51:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 51:57Speaker 02

  It's like my head knows better, but like, it's, I don't know if it's just society's pressure on us and social media and seeing, you know, everything else that everybody's doing and everybody's lives, it fucks with my head. It really does.

• 52:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Is it the, is it the pressure to be a perfect mom or to look perfect, perfect wife? Is there like something that like weighs on you?

• 52:19Speaker 02

  Perfect mom weighs on me more than anything else that like really, and you honestly, and you see that actually on this season. Like that's something that really comes out and people struck a nerve and it's like my Achilles heel.

• 52:32Rayna Greenberg?

  Is it judgment or just your own standards?

• 52:35Speaker 02

  It could be a little bit of both because I worry every day that I'm not doing the right thing for my kids. Like I, like my husband, like Beau does most, like he does the drop offs. He does their breakfast, lunch and dinner. Like he does all their appointments. Like he knows everything about school and all of that and like when certain things are. Like I don't know any of that. So like our roles were reversed in our household. Like I maybe do pick up like twice a month, you know? And so I'm like, oh my gosh, is this traumatizing my daughter that I don't do pick up that often? But I'm like, but I'm also working like. She has a parent. Does it? Yes. But like it, so there's a lot that I worry about that I'm like, is that okay?

• 53:19Speaker 02

  That I'm not doing some of the school activities and I'm like, but I'm working and I'm like, I'm accomplishing like my goals and my dreams and I, I'm like, hopefully it's enough for them to see their mom happy, you know? And, and working and, and trying to hustle and all that. Cause I do feel like if I wasn't doing everything I'm doing, I don't know that I would be fun to be around as a mom.

• 53:43Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. Yeah. Like you gotta put your own, what is that? Oxygen mask on?

• 53:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:48Rayna Greenberg?

  And also like you're not hiring some like nameless faces nanny. They have two parents that love them.

• 53:53Speaker 02

  We do have a nanny, Sonia. She's our, the heart and soul.

• 53:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Sure. That they probably like love. But good for you.

• 53:59Speaker 02

  Sonia and Beau run this house.

• 54:00Rayna Greenberg?

  Your husband's involved and they know that like two parents love them. They just divide the roles up. Did that come like naturally, that breakdown of like?

• 54:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, it wasn't really something, well, we had actually like kind of discussed it before we had kids, before COVID. Like when I went on tour, I'd asked him, I was like, you know, do you want to come on tour with me or do you want to stay back? And like, you know, he was working in casting, do you want to stay back and do that? And he was like, you know what? Like I kind of want to go on tour with you. I was like, so like if we're starting a life together, we're like, we're working on like my businesses, like one day I'm going to want to have kids and I'm going to want you to be like really fucking present as like their dad. So like, that was like discussed years before we had kids. Then we had kids, it was during COVID. And it was just really easy to fall into that routine because he's naturally better at a lot of the things that I am. I don't know how to cook. I don't know how to, I don't, and I don't care.

• 54:52Speaker 02

  Like, I don't, feeding a child is so boring. Like, and it's messy. And it's just like tedious and like.

• 55:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  And he's into it.

• 55:01Speaker 02

  Well, now it's really hard. More than you. More than me, yes.

• 55:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  Better at it.

• 55:05Speaker 02

  And so like, we just kind of like fell into the like, well, I have to go and work on this thing. So you have to be the one that's doing this. And it wasn't a conversation. It just.

• 55:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  Happened.

• 55:14Speaker 02

  Was the way that it was.

• 55:15Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 55:16Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, I was gonna ask that too. If it was like family meeting, we gotta figure this out. Or it just, I mean, I think that's great.

• 55:21Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:21Ashley Hesseltine?

  Like, you both fell into your, the natural roles.

• 55:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:24Ashley Hesseltine?

  So I think people look at your life, that you're doing everything. And do you still get this, like, comparison, looking at Instagram, what other people are doing? And, or do you feel like totally secure and?

• 55:36Speaker 02

  No, I, sometimes it creeps up on me.

• 55:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  I think people like, want to hear that. It's just like, it's, we're all human and.

• 55:41Speaker 02

  No, I have to actively choose. Like, whenever I feel like that feeling of, I don't know if jealousy is the right word. I'm just like, it's like the FOMO.

• 55:52Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 55:52Speaker 02

  Or something, or like, oh shit, I should be doing.

• 55:54Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes.

• 55:55Speaker 02

  This.

• 55:55Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 55:55Speaker 02

  I didn't even know that I should be doing this.

• 55:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  Right.

• 55:58Speaker 02

  Like, that feeling happens all the time when I'm following, you know, see my peers doing things. But I have to remind myself that like, and I've told myself this for a while. I wrote about this in the book. I got this from someone else, from the Bosticks, actually. They said this one time. They were like, if you are ever feeling that feeling that we're describing, imagine you have to just completely switch places with them. Like, everything in their life. Like, their spouses, their body, their wardrobe, their kids, their house, like, everything. That feeling will like quickly go away. And whenever I think that, I'm like, oh my God, I would never trade my life for anything.

• 56:37Ashley Hesseltine?

  I love that.

• 56:38Speaker 02

  That feeling goes away. And I then don't feel like, oh, I gotta catch up. And like, I do make it a point, like, I sound cheesy and I like, my old self would like. Me saying this, like, I do practice gratitude.

• 56:51Rayna Greenberg?

  You live in LA, you have to, of course.

• 56:54Speaker 02

  I do, like, the other day, oh, my god, we were.

• 56:56Rayna Greenberg?

  I knew that's what was coming. I was like, she's about to say gratitude.

• 56:59Speaker 02

  My husband.

• 57:00Rayna Greenberg?

  We feel the same way.

• 57:01Speaker 02

  But when I, like, took the kids the other day to this, like, Italian restaurant I love by Toroni, but I can't remember, like, Barolo or whatever it's called, it's on Larchmont. We took our kids there and they were so fucking well behaved. It was like a beautiful day, like, weather-wise, like, in LA. And, like, I had, like, anaberal spritz and we had a lovely time. I had lemon pasta. The kids, like, didn't even ask for screen time. They didn't even try to, like, we just, like, played card games, asked each other questions, colored, all that. And then we got in our car and, like, I was, like, responding to, like, emails about the show. And then, like, we were driving up home and I saw the Hollywood sign and I was like, I got everything I ever asked for.

• 57:41Speaker 02

  I got everything I fucking asked for. I love my husband. I fucking love my two kids. I love my house. Like, I got this show. I get to work with my best friends. Like, what the fuck? How the fuck did this happen? That I got everything I asked for. And, like, I have those moments all the time where I'm like, you need to be so fucking grateful, because this can literally all be taken from you at any second. You never know. Someone could become sick. Someone could lose a job. Like, it just, like, anything can happen. And I don't know, I'm just like, I'm really grateful.

• 58:15Rayna Greenberg?

  I love that. That's really beautiful. I'm glad you feel like that. Because I, I think it's an incredible sentiment. Like, look at somebody else's life and think of all the sacrifices they have to make to get there. And would you want to live their life for a day, a week, a month?

• 58:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 58:26Rayna Greenberg?

  It's really important to pause and think, like, all the things that you get to have.

• 58:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 58:29Rayna Greenberg?

  Like, I would choose my life any day. I, I do that, to have that. Like, now, you don't.

• 58:34Speaker 02

  See, you practice gratitude.

• 58:35Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, no, I do, too. I know.

• 58:36Speaker 02

  You live in Dennis.

• 58:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  Every day of our life is a gratitude journal, honestly. But I think that we are all the same and that, yeah, of course we fucking do it. We don't have to go just preach, like, wake up every morning.

• 58:52Speaker 02

  I don't write it down. I don't have a journal and I don't, yeah, I don't like make it a point. We do it in a normal way. Every morning I set my day with a gratitude. No, I don't.

• 59:01Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, but now I do have to ask you, do you have like a morning routine?

• 59:06Speaker 02

  No, it's like survival.

• 59:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  Two kids, a morning routine?

• 59:11Speaker 02

  There is no morning routine. Like, that is just like us being like, okay, we're up. And like, it's like, do I have to like, wake up like to the sound of screaming? Or is it like, do I have to wake up early to go shower, like get glam or something like that? It's like, every morning is different and it's like, it's always chaotic. And then it's like, who's taking what car? You know, and it's just, yeah. Mornings, I really don't like them.

• 59:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay. Do we see some of that chaos on the show?

• 59:36Speaker 02

  Yes, not morning times. I didn't, we didn't film a morning time.

• 59:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  I see this morning.

• 59:41Speaker 02

  We didn't film this, we didn't film a morning routine. No, because I probably would have been like, you guys are gonna have to get there, set up at like 5:30 in the morning to then catch everything. That's a lot just to catch a morning. Season two, I'll do that for you.

• 59:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, thanks. Make sure you gratitude journal in the morning and meditate and cold plunge. So your career, I like to talk about careers that kind of like ebbed and flowed and, you know, there was a time where I feel like you weren't out as much in the world. You're also having kids and like writing and things like that.

• 1:00:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, I was down.

• 1:00:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, when you were in that place, did you feel like, were you scared of coming back? Any, like being irrelevant, I'm just asking. Or that you would never come back?

• 1:00:18Speaker 02

  No, yeah. For a brief moment, there was like, let's move to Italy and start a food truck. That lasted like a day. Okay. Then there was like another brief moment of me being like, I'm gonna be Kris Jenner and I'm gonna manage Bo's career and turn him into something. Yeah. So then there was that. And then I was like, who am I kidding? So like, that was like a week of my life that I was just like, you know, maybe I'm just like, never gonna go out there again. But then once I got over that and I was like, you are Stassi fucking Schroeder. Okay. Yeah. Like, who are you kidding? I had, and I don't know if it's because I was pregnant, because if I weren't pregnant, I think I probably would have spiraled and like, you know, during 2020, become like a full-blown alcoholic and taking a lot of Xanax and numbed myself, you know?

• 1:01:03Speaker 02

  But I was pregnant, and when you're pregnant, or at least for me, you get like pregnancy bravery? Pregnancy confidence, where it's like you like-

• 1:01:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Pocket?

• 1:01:12Speaker 02

  I just, yes, and I really believed in myself. Like, I just really did. And so I was just like, you're just gonna take a long ass break to work on yourself? To like, be out of the limelight, enjoy your life, enjoy having your children, and just like, really figure out like who you are and just like plan your next move and plan it right. Like, and there was like never any doubt in my mind that I wasn't gonna come back in some sort of way. I really do believe in taking breaks, not that I chose my break in 2020, but it is good to have breaks and let, you know, be out-

• 1:01:57Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:57Speaker 02

  For a little while. I think that's, I think that's important.

• 1:02:00Rayna Greenberg?

  I think it's important for other people to hear too, because I think when you're down, it's almost impossible to see like through the haze and to see that like this will end someday and I can pivot and reinvent and rise again.

• 1:02:11Speaker 02

  God, but no, but being down is like, there's something really inspiring and hopeful about it, because like, when you have no opportunities and like nothing, like there's nothing to lose, there's, the, the world is actually kind of your oyster, anything can happen. So whatever it is that you want your life to be, you're starting from-

• 1:02:29Rayna Greenberg?

  The bottom.

• 1:02:29Speaker 02

  The ground zero. So it's like, alright, what do we want to do? There's so much opportunity in that, like-

• 1:02:36Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, when you have nothing to lose-

• 1:02:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:37Rayna Greenberg?

  Take a big swing, just-

• 1:02:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:39Rayna Greenberg?

  I mean, we just talked about that recently on an episode. We did like an episode about the millennial midlife crisis and a lot of people at a certain age just being like-

• 1:02:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't know what to do next. And I was like, if you were really at the bottom, that's the time to try whatever the fuck.

• 1:02:53Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:02:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  So.

• 1:02:54Rayna Greenberg?

  I feel like the worst times in my life have manifested like the best things that have happened in my life. I lost my job and my boyfriend I was living with. I was like a country song. And in the same week, I got fired from my job. I caught my boyfriend cheating on me. I had to kick him out of our shared home.

• 1:03:08Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 1:03:09Rayna Greenberg?

  It was the worst week of my life. I had to go. It was Thanksgiving. I had to go home, tell my whole family. I no longer had a job or a boyfriend.

• 1:03:14Speaker 02

  Oh, that's awful.

• 1:03:15Rayna Greenberg?

  And then like, I found everything right after that. You just, you can't take big swings because like, nothing really fucking matters.

• 1:03:21Speaker 02

  I know. I agree. I try telling my sister this. My sister's a part of the show also. Because she is like going through it. And I'm like, Georgie, you literally don't have anything to lose. You have no responsibility. Like, you can do anything you set your mind to now. Like, what do you want? Like, at this point in my life, I can't be like, what do I want? I have two children. So like, I have a responsibility to them. I have a lot of, you know, people that are relying on me. I have like a lot of pressure. Like, I can't just be like, you know what? I think I'm gonna switch gears and just like do this instead. Now I'm on the path. Like, I'm on the path that I chose. Like, you know, there is no turning back. I gotta lay in the bed that I fucking made or whatever the fuck, however people say it. But like, that's, that's where I'm at. But when you're, you know, you have nothing to lose, it's a beautiful time.

• 1:04:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  Single, fully, no partner and no kids, literally nobody.

• 1:04:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:04:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  You know, and even like, Raina's gonna move to New York and I would like to be there, but I have to think about my husband and his job and his life. That's new for me, too.

• 1:04:22Speaker 02

  That, yeah.

• 1:04:23Ashley Hesseltine?

  I guess I could just leave. I'm like, we're long distance again, bye. But it's like, that's a newer feeling.

• 1:04:28Rayna Greenberg?

  No, it's to consider a whole ass other person in their life.

• 1:04:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:04:31Rayna Greenberg?

  You know? I mean, I got it. Sometimes people are like, oh, you're single. I'm like, I got a mate. I really don't have to consider anybody. And it is nice sometimes. And like, I had a low moment last year where I was like, I just have nothing going on. Ashley's getting married. She's on tour. She's doing all these things. I was like, oh, I can be a comedian and go on tour. And like, it was born out of that. Because I was just like, I got nothing going on with anyone.

• 1:04:52Speaker 02

  That's glorious.

• 1:04:53Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, women are just amazing also. Like, women will just be at the lowest point in their lives and be like, look what I can do.

• 1:05:00Speaker 02

  Women are incredible.

• 1:05:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  And we pivot so well.

• 1:05:03Speaker 02

  We do.

• 1:05:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  What man has ever pivoted?

• 1:05:05Speaker 02

  No shit.

• 1:05:07Rayna Greenberg?

  What are they doing? We have a girlfriend that like her whole life came crashing down. Like her pet died, she moved across the country, she caught her, her relationship ended. Why is everyone cheating on everyone? I don't. Why do you think? I don't know.

• 1:05:21Speaker 02

  I, I don't know. Like I wonder like, who has the time?

• 1:05:25Rayna Greenberg?

  I, that's, my brother says that all the time. He's like, I don't, I don't have time to cheat on her. When the fuck would anyone have time?

• 1:05:31Speaker 02

  I, I really, besides like-

• 1:05:33Rayna Greenberg?

  People without kids.

• 1:05:34Speaker 02

  The moral issues. I just like, don't like, let's take that obvious out of it. That like, that's really wrong. You should get out of your, you should exit your relationship before you feel feelings or want to do something like that. When do you have the time?

• 1:05:44Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, right, but like- Okay. Men with a bunch of women, like with the whole Andrew Huberman thing that broke a couple of years ago. That was crazy. How does this guy? He had like six girlfriends. Plus his career. He always moving in with one girlfriend and that weekend found the time to go on a trip with another girlfriend.

• 1:06:00Speaker 02

  I don't know this person.

• 1:06:01Rayna Greenberg?

  Andrew Huberman?

• 1:06:01Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:06:02Rayna Greenberg?

  Don't worry about it.

• 1:06:03Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:06:03Rayna Greenberg?

  That's when men actually, that's when they can multitask. Like six girlfriends. He became more popular because of this. Guys were like, teach me how you do this. But yeah, I don't know how people have the time. I don't know how, I couldn't have the emotional energy to have two partners.

• 1:06:17Speaker 02

  No, I barely have the emotional energy to give love to my husband because I'm using it on my kids. Like I'm literally like, I'm so sorry. Like I actually like do have like a cap on how much love. I'm not just like overflowing with love. I'm not like, not that person. So like I'm using most of it on my children. And so I'm like, Beau, I'm so sorry. Like you don't get that overly affectionate person that I used to be. But like, just know I love you and I'm aware. Like I'm aware.

• 1:06:45Rayna Greenberg?

  I won't go to therapy, but I am aware. You or me, I'm like, I'm aware. I'm just not gonna go. Are you guys in therapy now or do you just go in and like for tune ups and whatnot?

• 1:06:55Speaker 02

  Not right now because it's just like, no.

• 1:06:59Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, who has the time?

• 1:07:00Speaker 02

  Who, thank you. Do you know how hard it was scheduling? Do you know how hard it was? Also because we had the same therapist as Taylor and Teddy and she was on the East Coast. So we had to factor that in, that it's like East Coast timing. So like it was just like so hard. And then like-

• 1:07:16Rayna Greenberg?

  Too hard to schedule.

• 1:07:16Speaker 02

  Every time we did therapy, I was like, why does this feel like this is directed towards me?

• 1:07:22Rayna Greenberg?

  Let's do him.

• 1:07:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, like, why is this always on me? I'm not the one that wants to even be here. You know, this is so annoying.

• 1:07:29Rayna Greenberg?

  I didn't ask for this meeting.

• 1:07:30Speaker 02

  It just felt like I was being bullied and I'm just like, I don't know. It just, it isn't for me. If he asks again, I will consider it.

• 1:07:39Rayna Greenberg?

  What if you pick the therapist and you pay the therapist and you're like, look, I have to win?

• 1:07:43Speaker 02

  Maybe. Yeah.

• 1:07:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, I have one more question about the show. Yeah, you have some miscellaneous things. Well, I'm just, I'm curious about filming with Katie Maloney again. And you guys had this like iconic friendship on Vanderpump and that was the storyline. Don't tell me it wasn't. It was for years.

• 1:07:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, it was. It was.

• 1:07:59Rayna Greenberg?

  Don't undermine me about your show, but I'm curious like how it is to film together again. I think people are just interested in like friendships ebbing and flowing in general and like, can you have a falling out with somebody and then find each other in different phases of your life? And how's that been?

• 1:08:14Speaker 02

  Well, we did have a bit of a falling out. That was being before a couple of years ago. And that was a moment where like I actually chose to ghost because I didn't want to blow up a friendship. I was like, I want to just separate myself a little bit. And then that just turned into, wait, we've barely spoken and barely, but we haven't acknowledged that there's a fallout. It was weird. But having her back, that has been incredibly comforting for me in terms of like filming with someone who I'm used to being with, like, no one gets it like her and me to get like in a scene. You know what I'm saying? And Christina Kelly also, like, she's also on the show and like she gets it also. But like Katie, you know, started Vanderpump Rules with

• 1:08:57Speaker 02

  me from the beginning and it was just like having us back together again. It was like riding a bike and just like, oh, this is how we do it. This is how we do it. And it was really fun being forced because reality TV forces you to do this to like, express what you're feeling. You can't sweep things under the rug. So we were forced to really like talk about everything. And then like that just like brought us closer. I think people would be surprised to like find out that like, yes, reality TV does ruin lives.

• 1:09:30Rayna Greenberg?

  I guess it does.

• 1:09:32Speaker 02

  But if you choose to do it and see it in a way where it's like, or it forces you to have those hard conversations so that you get past the next level and you get closer and you get to a more honest place, then it doesn't have to ruin lives. It just like brings you closer into like you have more of an understanding of each other. And I think that's also part of why I like reality TV so much. It forces me to have those conversations that I normally would be too fucking lazy to have. That I'd be like, I'm sorry, my day is full. I have two kids. I work. I I'm not fighting about this or I'm not like discussing how I really feel because there's just like not enough time in the day. When you're filming a reality show, you have to.

• 1:10:10Rayna Greenberg?

  That's your therapy.

• 1:10:10Speaker 02

  And that is my therapy. That is my therapy. Yeah. And then everyone gets to like see it and just like dissect it and judge it and like whatever.

• 1:10:16Rayna Greenberg?

  But that's the best advice about conflict, like zooming out from the show too. Like I tell people too, like when Ashley and I have conflict, I feel like at the end of it, I know her better. I understand her boundaries better. I she understands me better. Like it does strengthen your relationships with people or they'll end them forever.

• 1:10:30Speaker 02

  Or let them. You gotta choose.

• 1:10:32Rayna Greenberg?

  But you choose.

• 1:10:33Speaker 02

  Choose your route. Like, you know, pick your adventure.

• 1:10:36Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:36Speaker 02

  I guess. But I'm just of the sensibility that it makes me feel closer to everyone. So like that, maybe that's why I like to fight so much. Cause I'm just like, look how sweet.

• 1:10:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Bonding for you.

• 1:10:47Speaker 02

  After I just like verbally annihilated them.

• 1:10:50Rayna Greenberg?

  It's a closeness exercise.

• 1:10:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:10:52Rayna Greenberg?

  It's a love language.

• 1:10:53Speaker 02

  Taylor always does say that meanness is my love language.

• 1:10:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Do you guys have conflict, you and Taylor?

• 1:10:58Speaker 02

  No. I don't think we've ever gotten in a, we've never gotten in a fight. She's gotten in her head and been like, oh my God, are you mad at me? And I'm like, what bitch? What are you gonna learn that I've never been mad at you? Like you are some rare unicorn that like I, the second that we met, it was like soulmate energy. I was like, this person is gonna be in my life in a really profound way for the rest of my life. Like we just have this like connection. So like, I don't think we fought. Yeah.

• 1:11:27Rayna Greenberg?

  And I love that. And if you guys are curious about Taylor and Taylor who are on the show, we had them on our show in December of 2025. You guys can listen to that. And Taylor's been on our show a couple of times. They were here filming and we were just like, how much can you share? You know? So.

• 1:11:39Speaker 02

  They better have shared nothing.

• 1:11:40Rayna Greenberg?

  They did. They refused to share. It was really a bummer.

• 1:11:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, well Stassi, thanks so much.

• 1:11:46Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 1:11:47Rayna Greenberg?

  This was so wonderful.

• 1:11:48Speaker 02

  This was so fun.

• 1:11:49Rayna Greenberg?

  So open.

• 1:11:50Speaker 02

  I hope I didn't word them too much.

• 1:11:52Rayna Greenberg?

  No.

• 1:11:52Speaker 02

  I don't think I did.

• 1:11:52Rayna Greenberg?

  This was perfect. You guys will also let us know.

• 1:11:55Speaker 02

  Everyone's saying it's okay.

• 1:11:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 1:11:57Speaker 02

  The whole.

• 1:11:57Rayna Greenberg?

  The team is happy. We've the biggest team we've had in here.

• 1:12:00Speaker 02

  I'm a big deal.

• 1:12:01Rayna Greenberg?

  We're bursting at the seams in here. But we're just really excited for you. Congrats. And like, we're really excited to just see what you've created.

• 1:12:08Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 1:12:09Rayna Greenberg?

  It's really exciting.

• 1:12:10Speaker 02

  No, I really hope you guys like it and you're not like flop.

• 1:12:12Rayna Greenberg?

  I can't wait to watch it, so.

• 1:12:14Speaker 02

  It will be out July 29th on Freeform, July 30th on Hulu.

• 1:12:18Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 1:12:18Speaker 02

  All episodes dropping on Hulu.

• 1:12:20Rayna Greenberg?

  The whole season, you guys?

• 1:12:21Speaker 02

  Oh, my God. Yeah, so you can binge it.

• 1:12:23Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:12:24Speaker 02

  And then I'm gonna leave the country for a couple of weeks while everybody has their opinions.

• 1:12:28Rayna Greenberg?

  So I'll start a food truck in Italy.

• 1:12:31Rayna Greenberg?

  Um, okay, and then where can people find you?

• 1:12:33Speaker 02

  Google me, uh, at Stassi Schroeder. Um.

• 1:12:38Rayna Greenberg?

  Google me, bitch. Why was, what was Google me, bitch from?

• 1:12:41Speaker 02

  It's like a kid.

• 1:12:41Rayna Greenberg?

  A kid?

• 1:12:42Speaker 02

  Right.

• 1:12:43Rayna Greenberg?

  Google me, bitch. Well, people can watch your podcast on Netflix.

• 1:12:46Speaker 02

  Oh, yes.

• 1:12:46Rayna Greenberg?

  Buy your books.

• 1:12:47Speaker 02

  God, I forgot how to do this.

• 1:12:48Rayna Greenberg?

  I'll help.

• 1:12:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, you can watch Stassi with Tay on Netflix, listen to it wherever you get your podcasts. I have a Patreon with Bo, my husband, called The Good, The Bad, The Baby. Sometimes I post on TikTok.

• 1:13:01Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, well, uh, thanks again.

• 1:13:03Speaker 02

  Thanks.

• 1:13:03Rayna Greenberg?

  You guys can check it out. And you can find us, girlsgottaeat.com, girlsgottaeepodcast on Instagram and TikTok. I'm Ash Hass on Instagram and TikTok. Raina is Raina dot Greenberg, RainaGreenberg.com for her tour tickets in the fall.

• 1:13:13Speaker 02

  Wait, I have shows this week, actually.

• 1:13:15Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh.

• 1:13:15Speaker 02

  I have, uh, just, I have Nashville and Salt Lake this week.

• 1:13:18Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, my God, this week. Right from when you were sick.

• 1:13:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:13:20Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay, your makeup shows. A full video on Spotify and YouTube and subscribe. Share this with a friend. We will see you guys Thursday.

• 1:13:29Speaker 02

  Have a great week, guys.

• 1:13:30Rayna Greenberg?

  Bye.