"Sting"

Put on your slippers and overshirt: it’s the one-and-only Sting. Digital silence, noblesse oblige, and the tradition of nonsense songs. “It’s cool to say you like jazz” …on another brand spankin’ new episode of the podcast named SmartLess.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Sean Hayes?

  This episode of Smartless is sponsored by Google Book. So the other day, I wanted to make invitations for my dog Ricky's birthday party. And I've got three things open on my laptop. An adorable photo of Ricky, a picture of a birthday cake, and the RSVP details. Thing is, as much as I look like one, I'm not a canine birthday party invitation designer. That's where Google Book comes in. It's a whole new kind of laptop with a feature called Magic Pointer. I just click the photos and different elements on my screen, and boom, Magic Pointer designs a customized birthday party invitation for Ricky. Click anything on your screen to create whatever you want. Visit googlebook.com. Available to 18-plus users.

• 0:44Sean Hayes?

  Compatibility and availability vary.

• 0:49Jason Bateman?

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• 1:29Sean Hayes?

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• 2:05Sean Hayes?

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• 2:49Speaker 02

  Hi, this is Sting, and I'm waiting to be the surprise guest on Smartless. I'm quite sure what that means, smart less, but we're gonna find out. They're gonna talk to me for an hour, so hopefully I can be smart less with them. Welcome to Smartless.

• 3:27Jason Bateman?

  Oh, Will. Will, you've been, uh, did you sleep over at Thoreau's last night?

• 3:31Will Arnett?

  I just realized. I had an over shirt in the other room and I just came, I was working out and I was like, I was like, I took a long sleeve shirt out just to put it on and I was like, oh shit, it's 9:30 and I took a leak and I got my water and I got in here, I was like, as I logged in, as my Zoom came up, I went, motherfucker, I'm not wearing it.

• 3:50Jason Bateman?

  You're not wearing sleeves and, uh, so Justin Thoreau's just, he's just waking up?

• 3:56Will Arnett?

  Justin Thoreau, he's not, he's not allowed to wear a Liverpool Football Club cutoff t-shirt.

• 4:01Jason Bateman?

  You just had a baby. He did.

• 4:03Will Arnett?

  I did?

• 4:03Jason Bateman?

  He just had a baby.

• 4:06Jason Bateman?

  I saw, uh, I saw a shot of, of him, um, sleeping with his new baby on his chest. But he wasn't at home sleeping. I guess he was in the hospital or something. But, um, true to form, his top's off.

• 4:21Will Arnett?

  I know what you're gonna say.

• 4:22Jason Bateman?

  His top's off.

• 4:23Will Arnett?

  He might've been on an airplane.

• 4:24Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, he can't.

• 4:25Will Arnett?

  He likes to, he likes to, he, he'll fly without a tee, he'll fly without a shirt on when he, right?

• 4:29Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, you know this, Sean, right? When he flies, you know, he's on a plane, um, he can't sleep.

• 4:33Will Arnett?

  Jason almost said "commercial." He can't even say the word.

• 4:38Will Arnett?

  Oh my god, it won't even come out of your lips.

• 4:42Jason Bateman?

  Justin can't sleep with a shirt on. And so if he's going to sleep on a plane, if it's a night flight, he takes his top off. And, and, and the, the flight attendant's gotta wake him up and say, "Sir, you can't sleep, you can't have your shirt off on a plane." He says, "Well, I can't sleep with a shirt on."

• 5:01Will Arnett?

  JB, although I do remember, do you remember years ago, you, me, Tony Hale, Eli and somebody else, maybe Cara or somebody from your team, we flew back from London and we, and we threw fingers for the, the, the thing that folded into the bed.

• 5:18Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 5:18Will Arnett?

  And then, I didn't have a shirt on, I remember you're disgusted.

• 5:21Jason Bateman?

  That's disgusting.

• 5:22Will Arnett?

  Okay, but you're like, "You're not wearing a shirt."

• 5:24Jason Bateman?

  You know what I do now? You know what I do? It's hot, we're in public. When I go to sleep, I stick my shirt into my pants like that. You know, I stick my shirt so that when I roll around at night, the shirt doesn't come up. It doesn't come up. Why don't you get one of those little onesies snaps?

• 5:37Will Arnett?

  Hey, listen, and to our listener, anybody out there who's, who's just looking for some, some-

• 5:42Jason Bateman?

  Who's lonely and looking, looking for some hot dude.

• 5:45Will Arnett?

  Just some hot stuff going on.

• 5:47Jason Bateman?

  You don't wanna tuck that shirt into your CPAP hose?

• 5:49Will Arnett?

  Sean, you should just, you should do a side cast.

• 5:52Jason Bateman?

  Tuck them into your CPAP hoses.

• 5:53Will Arnett?

  Just do a side cast where you describe some of your routines for Sean after dark, you know?

• 5:58Jason Bateman?

  Don't, don't threaten me.

• 6:00Will Arnett?

  Sean sent us a picture last night to JB and me after, remember, after, after the show. And again, it was the star of, the star of the photo again was a heaping plate of spaghetti. And, and then, and then, uh, the supporting cast was on the same plate, Swedish fish.

• 6:17Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, absolutely. A big fat bag of them.

• 6:19Will Arnett?

  And JB just, and he's having more now.

• 6:21Jason Bateman?

  He sprinkled, sprinkled the fish on the pasta.

• 6:24Will Arnett?

  JB, you suggested he mix it in.

• 6:26Jason Bateman?

  But there was no like, "Ha ha" or anything. Jason just wrote, "Put the fish in the spaghetti." And you thought it was a good idea?

• 6:34Sean Hayes?

  I did think it was a good idea. It was great. You know what, you know what I did last week? What I do is every single day I wear my slippers to the theater because I know right away I'm just coming home and going right to bed.

• 6:44Jason Bateman?

  Hold on. Yeah. Hold on. You're shuffling down some New York street in slippers, just blending in.

• 6:51Sean Hayes?

  Well, I get out of the car, straight to the stage door. But the other day, the traffic was so bad, I had to get out and run. So I'm running down the street with my hair, like, still wet from the shower, in slippers, with like a ratty t-shirt. I looked, I looked like a...

• 7:06Jason Bateman?

  Like a New York resident.

• 7:07Will Arnett?

  I'm sorry. So, real quick, how do you think you look now?

• 7:12Jason Bateman?

  Wait, how come you're wearing slippers, um, out of the car and into the theater?

• 7:17Will Arnett?

  Way to go, way to go, Sean.

• 7:18Sean Hayes?

  Because there's something...

• 7:20Jason Bateman?

  Do you not like shoes?

• 7:22Sean Hayes?

  No.

• 7:22Jason Bateman?

  It's inconvenient to wear shoes.

• 7:24Sean Hayes?

  Well, I'm not going anywhere after the show. I'm just going home, so I can just keep them on and...

• 7:28Will Arnett?

  And you throw them straight into the incinerator, or?

• 7:32Sean Hayes?

  When I'm done, yeah.

• 7:33Will Arnett?

  I've gone to dinner with Sean at JAR.

• 7:35Sean Hayes?

  And I had slippers on.

• 7:36Will Arnett?

  And he shows up and he's wearing slippers, JB.

• 7:37Jason Bateman?

  Why? But why? Uh, uh, are you talking, just that you don't want to deal with laces and things?

• 7:42Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah. I just want to go to the theater.

• 7:44Jason Bateman?

  Hold it, hold it, hold it. There are a thousand options for men.

• 7:49Will Arnett?

  Velcro, New Balance, I think you're at that place.

• 7:51Jason Bateman?

  That are laceless shoes that you can be proud of, that if you do need to run down a street, they will work. Like vans, or loafers.

• 8:00Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 8:01Jason Bateman?

  Or boots.

• 8:02Sean Hayes?

  I know, I gotta start getting those.

• 8:03Will Arnett?

  Boat shoes.

• 8:04Sean Hayes?

  Or what shoes?

• 8:05Will Arnett?

  Boat shoes.

• 8:06Sean Hayes?

  Boat shoes, yeah.

• 8:07Will Arnett?

  Like a boat shoe.

• 8:07Jason Bateman?

  Crocs even would be a lesser offense.

• 8:10Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 8:11Will Arnett?

  Uh...

• 8:11Jason Bateman?

  Okay, you think about it, you think about it.

• 8:13Sean Hayes?

  I love my Uggs, yeah.

• 8:14Will Arnett?

  Crocs, Crocs are an interesting, how, where do we land on Crocs? Have we been there?

• 8:18Sean Hayes?

  I think the jury's still out. There's a long deliberation, yeah.

• 8:21Will Arnett?

  It's like jazz. We're still out. Is it cool to like it or cool to not? I'm, I'm, I won't take a position on jazz yet.

• 8:27Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, well, you don't want to go down the drain, um, like, uh, like one of our famous actors lately? I mean, and by the way...

• 8:34Will Arnett?

  I mean, just, I, I'm just saying in terms of whether it's for me or not, I'm saying.

• 8:37Jason Bateman?

  Oh, yeah. Well, you know what? I think it is, it's something that I, you know, Ken Burns got me really into baseball because of his documentary on baseball. This is 30 some years ago.

• 8:47Sean Hayes?

  I gotta watch that.

• 8:47Jason Bateman?

  And he's got one on jazz that I'm waiting to open up and climb into because I think I'd be addicted to it.

• 8:53Will Arnett?

  Oh, yeah.

• 8:54Jason Bateman?

  Once I get his.

• 8:55Will Arnett?

  I'm not, I'm not calling into question the incredible musicianship or any of that. I mean, in terms of.

• 9:00Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, of course. Wait, you guys, there's a new UFO documentary that just came out.

• 9:04Jason Bateman?

  Really?

• 9:05Sean Hayes?

  You gotta see it.

• 9:05Will Arnett?

  Oh, wait. Hang on. I gotta take the tinfoil off my TV, but I definitely want to watch it.

• 9:11Jason Bateman?

  If this is not the age of disclosure?

• 9:13Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, no, it's the same. No, no, it's.

• 9:16Jason Bateman?

  Age of disclosure is incredible.

• 9:17Sean Hayes?

  Who's the guy? Yeah, I, it's the guy, shoot, I can't remember his name. I'll find it by the time.

• 9:21Jason Bateman?

  Text it to me when we talk later.

• 9:22Sean Hayes?

  Okay, okay.

• 9:23Jason Bateman?

  Now, you guys have talked about a couple of things that our guests can really chime in on and straighten out for us. One is how to keep the voice healthy on stage and the other is jazz.

• 9:36Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 9:36Jason Bateman?

  Oh, mama. Yeah, dudes, today, for your listening pleasure, I offer you a man with just a dash of talent and a tiny sprinkle of accomplishments. He's an actor and a musician. He has a Golden Globe, an Emmy, four Academy Award nominations. He's received a Kennedy Center Honor and a CBE of the British Empire. As a musician, he's received 17 Grammy Awards. He sold 100 million records.

• 10:07Sean Hayes?

  What?

• 10:08Jason Bateman?

  And has been inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. He's been doing what he does in a league of his own and consistently setting the mark for what is relevant and cool since the year I was born, literally. He's one of my heroes and I'm incredibly excited to welcome him here today. Fellas, here's the one and only Sting.

• 10:26Sean Hayes?

  Oh, way.

• 10:28Jason Bateman?

  Oh, man. Good morning, gentlemen. This is a big guy.

• 10:32Speaker 02

  So cool.

• 10:34Jason Bateman?

  I apologize for the elongated coffee chat up front. Thank you for staying with us.

• 10:39Will Arnett?

  It's riveting, I know.

• 10:40Jason Bateman?

  But as you see, this is our only time to really communicate. And so we steal a little bit of time from our guests and we chit chat. But now we've got talking points to talk about. Let's start with vocal health on stage. Are gummy bears and pasta a part of your vocal health at all? Is that your key?

• 11:03Speaker 02

  Definitely not. You know, it is a muscle. So you have to treat it with the respect you would treat a muscle if you were a footballer or a runner.

• 11:13Jason Bateman?

  And do exercises, yeah.

• 11:15Speaker 02

  You have to stretch, you have to sing before you go on. Do, yeah, exercise.

• 11:20Jason Bateman?

  What's your favorite? What's your go to set of pushups for your vocal cords?

• 11:26Speaker 02

  For my voice, I think you start gently with lip trills.

• 11:33Speaker 02

  Fifth?

• 11:37Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 11:38Speaker 02

  And that loosens everything up.

• 11:39Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, for sure.

• 11:40Speaker 02

  And then you get fuller and fuller. Don't leave your best notes in the dressing room, though. That's the secret.

• 11:47Jason Bateman?

  Right, do you do all the?

• 11:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, very good.

• 11:52Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, all those, you have to. And you taught yourself, you taught yourself early on to sing, yes? Or did you take, did you ever take any formal lessons?

• 12:01Speaker 02

  I sold newspapers as a child on the street corner. So I, my first singing job was to sell Evening Chronicle in my town. And I would sing. Evening Chronicle!

• 12:18Speaker 02

  Really?

• 12:19Jason Bateman?

  That would get some attention.

• 12:20Sean Hayes?

  And people would come over because it was loud and you'd be like, hey, you wanna buy a paper?

• 12:25Speaker 02

  Of course, yeah. I'd stand outside the shipyard, where I was born, next to a shipyard. And I'd sell the evening paper to the shipyard workers as they came out.

• 12:33Sean Hayes?

  Do it again, what are the words? Do it again.

• 12:36Speaker 02

  Evening Chronicle!

• 12:40Jason Bateman?

  It does sound oddly like Sean.

• 12:42Speaker 02

  Evening Chronicle!

• 12:44Jason Bateman?

  See?

• 12:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, there it is.

• 12:47Will Arnett?

  That's a good warm up.

• 12:48Jason Bateman?

  And then also Sting, the, now, you know, I do a lot of incredibly in-depth research. So on Wikipedia.

• 12:56Will Arnett?

  You have access to Google, is that what you mean?

• 12:58Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, on Wikipedia, they say, is this true? That you, a friend of your father, I think, left behind a guitar, and a Spanish guitar? And that is what sort of sparked the interest in, in music? And you were playing around with that, partially true?

• 13:15Speaker 02

  Well, as a kid, eight years old, my, I called him my uncle John. Everybody was your uncle in my street. He emigrated to Canada.

• 13:25Will Arnett?

  Yes.

• 13:26Speaker 02

  Good choice. And he couldn't take his guitar, so he.

• 13:29Will Arnett?

  We don't allow guitars.

• 13:30Speaker 02

  Left it to the family. And I recognized that thing as a friend for life. I also recognized it as some kind of escape mechanism.

• 13:39Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 13:40Speaker 02

  I thought, I'm gonna escape with this thing. I didn't quite, it was a vague idea. But I did not want to work in that shipyard where everybody else worked. So I thought the guitar is maybe my, my passage out, my passport out of here. And I sat in the corner, didn't speak to anyone for six months, learned to play it. I saved up for the string that was missing.

• 14:03Jason Bateman?

  Really?

• 14:03Speaker 02

  And I could play pretty, pretty quickly.

• 14:07Jason Bateman?

  Totally self-taught? You just sort of figured out the combination of little pressing with the fingers gives you a different chord? Or was there any help?

• 14:15Speaker 02

  I had a very good musical ear. My mom was a piano player, so she, she sort of listened to me and goes, she said, you have a good ear, son. You should, you should learn music. So she sent me down the street to an old music teacher, retired. And taught me, he taught me music. But I have to walk down my high street with a guitar in a plastic bag. And you could not go unmolested if you were carrying a guitar down my high street.

• 14:43Will Arnett?

  You should have worn slippers, they would have stayed away from you.

• 14:48Jason Bateman?

  That's Sean's safety strategy.

• 14:50Speaker 02

  I never wear slippers.

• 14:51Will Arnett?

  Wow, wait, so Sting, whereabouts is this in in in England?

• 14:55Speaker 02

  Okay, I come from the northeast coast of England. Near the city and between the city of Newcastle and the North Sea. There's a town called Warsen where it was a big shipyard. That's that was the only source of employment in the town. And it was quite a surreal industrial environment. Literally, I lived next door to this place. The my street would be the sun would be blotted out by the ship, the hull of a ship. I'd watch thousands of men walk to work every morning and think, is that is that what I have to do?

• 15:27Jason Bateman?

  And now you've and now you've written, we're gonna get to this, but you've you've you've not not recently written, you but you are you are doing another tour of and grander yet of The Last Ship, yes?

• 15:40Speaker 02

  I am.

• 15:40Jason Bateman?

  Tell us about it.

• 15:41Speaker 02

  Well, I've been writing it my whole life in a way. You know, I I described a surreal industrial environment, which I did not appreciate at the time. But in hindsight, you know, once I was I'd left and I had an international career and success. I realized that I was gifted with something that was quite precious. I mean, the profound symbolism of giant ships. A river going by the end of the house, the sea, a church tower. These were very powerful symbols for a budding songwriter, a budding writer, budding artist.

• 16:19Speaker 02

  And I I realized that that I needed to tell the story of my community, the the community that made me who I am. It gave me a sense of identity, a work ethic, an engine to escape from it. But nonetheless, I needed to

• 16:39Speaker 02

  pay a debt back, if you like, to to the people who brought me up and say thank you.

• 16:44Will Arnett?

  So then how did you? So how did you come from there, from this place in the northeast of England? And sort of, not self-taught, but you did, you obviously had this inclination and you had the help from this music teacher. And then how did you, how did you form the police? How did that first happen? I'm so interested. I'm such a, I gotta say, I'm freaking out a little bit.

• 17:08Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, me too.

• 17:09Will Arnett?

  I'm such a massive fan of you.

• 17:10Speaker 02

  Me too. I did a lot of stuff before I got a job in the police. I had a real job before I was a celebrity. I was a schoolteacher.

• 17:20Will Arnett?

  No way.

• 17:21Speaker 02

  I taught in a mining village. I taught 11-year-olds.

• 17:25Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 17:26Speaker 02

  Soccer, music, English, math.

• 17:30Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 17:30Speaker 02

  And then I realized that if I didn't leave this teaching job, I would be stuck there forever. So I told the headmistress, she was a nun, I said, "Look, I'm leaving at the end of term." And she said, "Well, you'll lose your pension."

• 17:49Speaker 02

  And she was right. I did lose my pension.

• 17:51Jason Bateman?

  You were probably 30 years away from your pension at least, right?

• 17:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was important then, though. But I decided, no, I would go to London. So I had one phone number. I was also a dad. I just recently had a kid. I was married. I had a car and a dog. I paid tax. I voted. So I was a grown-up.

• 18:13Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 18:13Speaker 02

  Before I became, you know, a cosied celebrity. So I always, I always say that. That's so important for me. It gives me my balance. If I have any balance, it's because of that.

• 18:28Jason Bateman?

  But you were armed with this incredible intellect. And this, this environment, this upbringing of, I mean, it sounds incredibly cinematic, A, but these, these elements that, to me, sort of lend themselves to metaphors and issues of, of sort of existentialism and...

• 18:56Jason Bateman?

  What not like you were able to match your intellect to your upbringing and write these songs. Uh, for the rest of your life. Is that, is that, is that what kind of? Do you find that it all culminates into this great place, uh, with the last ship?

• 19:11Will Arnett?

  Well, well, JB, I'll sort of dove on that too, which is, which is. So many musicians or artists that we talked to have come out, uh, you know, start, start doing it very young. Maybe started in a band when they're 19 and they haven't had the things that you just described. All these experience, these rich experiences of being a dad, of having a job, of paying taxes, of voting, all that kind of stuff. And then they, they go into this artistic life and they don't have, you seem to have like, again, kind of JB, what you were saying. Drawing on all these real life experiences.

• 19:42Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. And your lyrics always have been, you know, they're, they're far from silly. Um, they're always about something.

• 19:49Speaker 02

  Some of them are silly, Jason.

• 19:51Jason Bateman?

  Well, do, do, do, da, da, da, I suppose.

• 19:54Will Arnett?

  No, they're the least silly. They're the least silly.

• 19:59Speaker 02

  I mean, I was making a point there about nonsense songs.

• 20:02Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:02Speaker 02

  Yeah. Do, do, uh, diddy, diddy, da, do, run, run, run.

• 20:05Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 20:06Speaker 02

  Hey, nonny, nonny, no from Shakespeare. I mean.

• 20:09Jason Bateman?

  Obladi, obla da.

• 20:10Speaker 02

  It's a tradition.

• 20:12Will Arnett?

  Well, sorry, just a side notes thing. I know we've asked you five questions here and you haven't. But one of, one of your more famous sort of one word lyrics, and I wanted to hear your thoughts on this, of course, is in the Dire Straits song. Is when you came on, you're saying, I want my MTV.

• 20:26Jason Bateman?

  All right, launched the whole thing.

• 20:27Will Arnett?

  I mean, launched an entire thing, but anyway.

• 20:31Jason Bateman?

  But, but, but yeah. So, so, so then, um, so yeah, so picking one of those questions, they're still continuing on the last ship. Have you found that this is, and you're nowhere near done, but, uh, that this is a, this is a really interesting project for you to now revisit. Um, and continue to talk about, cause there's, I think there's some new songs in it. Talk about where you came from and marrying your experience, your intellect and all of that into, um, how you started.

• 21:01Speaker 02

  You know, it's a deeply emotional, uh, play for me. Um.

• 21:07Speaker 02

  My parents, who died like forty years ago, are onstage with me every night. There's something, there's this kind of spiritual connection I have with the people I've lost. And my brother came to see the play in Amsterdam the other day. And he was a wreck. He cried from the beginning to the end.

• 21:26Jason Bateman?

  Oh, really?

• 21:27Speaker 02

  In a good way. It was cathartic for him. But he knows exactly what I'm singing about and the community that we come from. So it's a very emotional play. And I'm gonna be doing it at the Metropolitan Opera House in New York City. I mean, it's such an amazing dream.

• 21:45Jason Bateman?

  I'm gonna come see that. I'm gonna be in town. I'm gonna come see that.

• 21:48Speaker 02

  Please do.

• 21:48Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, I'm very, very excited about it. And what about it that, what about it for you said to your, you said to yourself, well, I'm gonna, I'm gonna write a musical about this. And there's gonna be performance in addition to music and lyrics and stuff, as opposed to I wanna write an album about this subject?

• 22:09Speaker 02

  I think I was going through a period of, I call it writer's block, but that's a little bit dramatic. But just wondering, what do you write about? You know, you're in your forties. You don't wanna write about your Chevrolet or your girlfriend. You know, it's, it's, it's just, you're beyond that. So I went back to my past. Went back to the town I was brought up in and started to sing songs about people I knew. And that freed me up. Instead of navel gazing into my own psyche, I would try and, you know, see the world through somebody else's eyes, somebody I knew. And that really freed up the songwriting. And these songs came out of me like projectile vomiting,

• 22:53Speaker 02

  as if they'd been stored up there for a long, long time. It was a very quick process.

• 22:58Jason Bateman?

  Is it because the, is it because the, the subject matter or the thematics of it are particularly more relevant and resonant today in today's society? Or?

• 23:09Speaker 02

  Oh, I think there are certain, certainly relevance to today. You know, it's about a community with, under threat from economic forces that they have no control over. Economics are saying, well, the job you do making ships is now irrelevant and you are expendable. And of course, all of us are facing that right now with the AI. All of us can be replaced by a robot, or so they think. I have opinions about that, but we are, we are, we are under threat.

• 23:41Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 23:42Will Arnett?

  I remember I watched that, I watched that documentary about Sunderland Till I Die, which is not far, I guess, from you. That was.

• 23:48Speaker 02

  Very close.

• 23:49Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 23:50Jason Bateman?

  You're a Newcastle fan, though, yes?

• 23:51Speaker 02

  I support the other, other team, yeah.

• 23:53Will Arnett?

  You support Newcastle.

• 23:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:55Will Arnett?

  That's, it's a good squad.

• 23:57Jason Bateman?

  Oh, boy.

• 23:58Will Arnett?

  I'm a Liverpool supporter.

• 24:01Sean Hayes?

  We'll be right back.

• 24:05Sean Hayes?

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• 24:46Sean Hayes?

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• 25:18Sean Hayes?

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• 26:01Jason Bateman?

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• 27:28Sean Hayes?

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• 28:09Jason Bateman?

  And now, back to the show.

• 28:12Will Arnett?

  I did want to get more into the lyrics because you've always... Well, first of all, another thing is,

• 28:19Will Arnett?

  are you... Do you write music first? Do you write lyrics first? Is it a mixture of the two? Because so many of your lyrics, I mean, so many of your songs, you know, the lyrics are so... I don't know. "Message in a Bottle", for instance, like a song like that, which is so dense lyrically and is such an incredible...

• 28:39Jason Bateman?

  They're satisfying on their own. They don't even need...

• 28:41Will Arnett?

  They're such a great message and so resonant.

• 28:45Speaker 02

  You know, there's no one method to write a song. You can start with a lyric. You can start with a riff or a series of chords or a melody that suddenly floats into your head. But I have to remind myself every time I want to write a song that all of them, even the most successful ones, began as a tiny kernel of an idea. Just something that intrigued me, a novelty, an interval, you know, a flattened fifth or something very tiny. And then I built on it bit by bit. And they weren't masterpieces until you did a lot of work on them.

• 29:26Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 29:26Jason Bateman?

  Does that...

• 29:27Will Arnett?

  Yeah, but that's like... Sorry, just to... I'm now on "Message in a Bottle", and I'm thinking about it. For me, that's always been one of those songs that really sort of captures that...

• 29:38Will Arnett?

  The spirit of loneliness, especially at the end when you sort of say, you know, he talks about sending it out and then woke up this morning, "Can't believe what I saw."

• 29:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:45Will Arnett?

  "Hundred billion bottles wash up on the shore." And I always loved the line, "Seems I'm not alone at being alone." It's just like, that always... I mean, it's as impactful to me today as the first time I heard it. And I wonder if you remember writing that and where you were at when you wrote a song like that?

• 30:04Speaker 02

  I was living in Bayswater in a basement flat in a terribly salubrious part of London. And I wrote that guitar riff, the "Message in a Bottle" thing. And I'm thinking, "What is this about? What is it?" And I was feeling a low ebb.

• 30:25Speaker 02

  I'm thinking, I feel like I'm shipwrecked. And I'm a castaway here. Because I wasn't successful at the time. I was struggling to make a living. I'd gone to London with a dream and it wasn't being realized immediately. So this was from that period then. And I'd only be singing it to the dog. Who would occasionally wag a tail. But that was it. That was the only response I got.

• 30:52Jason Bateman?

  The, you know, when you say that all these, no matter what the song is, it always starts with just a little kernel. Does that then ever put you in a place of,

• 31:06Jason Bateman?

  like, are you ever able to relax for fear of, of, of missing a little kernel that might come by? Just walking down the street, making some sort of observation, or, or hearing something somebody might say, or thinking of a little bit of a tune? Are you ever, ever able to just turn off the, the radar?

• 31:24Speaker 02

  It's important to, to keep a notebook, I think. So you can, you can, you know, wake up with a, with a melody in your head.

• 31:34Jason Bateman?

  Do you have a little tiny notebook? Or do you, or do you use like your iPhone now?

• 31:38Speaker 02

  I, well, yeah. The notes on my iPhone.

• 31:42Sean Hayes?

  Do you ever, do you ever dream melodies?

• 31:45Speaker 02

  Uh, I, I wake up with melodies in my head.

• 31:47Sean Hayes?

  I do too sometimes, but I'm too lazy to do anything about it.

• 31:51Will Arnett?

  Is it usually, is it usually the melody from Benny Hill?

• 31:55Jason Bateman?

  Wait, what do you, what do you do when you wake up with a melody? How do you remember it? Do you hum it into like voice notes?

• 32:01Speaker 02

  I should do that, yeah. You know, I wouldn't get back to sleep if I wake up with a melody. I will not be able to sleep. So I go, I go down and sit with a guitar and say, okay.

• 32:11Jason Bateman?

  Go, go back to going to London for the first time when you were being, you were a teacher. And then I'm always fascinated with like, how did you, had you visited London? You saw the big city and it inspired you? Like, how did you, what drove you to think, you know what? I have to go to London and pursue this?

• 32:29Speaker 02

  There was no way to, to, to do what I wanted to do in, in my, my town. There was no template for that at all.

• 32:35Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 32:35Speaker 02

  So you, basically, you had to go to London. That was it.

• 32:38Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, okay.

• 32:39Speaker 02

  And so, you know, I auditioned for, to, to sing in cocktail bars.

• 32:45Speaker 02

  And they'd say, well, we want you to do top forty hits. I said, well, I don't know any top forty hits, but I've got a song of my own. And I'd sing, every little thing she does is magic. And the guy would say, well, it's not a hit, is it? I said, well, not yet.

• 33:02Will Arnett?

  Oh, if he could see you now.

• 33:04Speaker 02

  I didn't get that job.

• 33:06Sean Hayes?

  Wow. That's amazing. That's amazing. Wow.

• 33:08Jason Bateman?

  Since you started on the guitar, when was the transition to bass? Was that simply because the guy, I forget, I forget his name, who you started with, with Stuart, that Andy later replaced?

• 33:21Speaker 02

  Oh, um.

• 33:22Jason Bateman?

  Was it because he wanted to play guitar and you pivoted over to bass?

• 33:25Speaker 02

  No, I just, I think it's a very, very astute choice to make. If you want to be a bandleader, because I sing the top line.

• 33:36Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 33:37Speaker 02

  And because I play the bottom line, the rest of the band has to operate literally within my bandwidth.

• 33:43Jason Bateman?

  Ah.

• 33:44Speaker 02

  And as a bass player, you can change the harmony very, very profoundly. The piano player or the guitarist can be playing a C chord. If I play a G below that, I've completely altered the harmony. So I'm in control. It's a very subtle way of controlling, but it's very, it's very profound.

• 34:03Jason Bateman?

  Oh, wow.

• 34:04Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 34:04Jason Bateman?

  I'd love to.

• 34:04Sean Hayes?

  One, six, four, or one, six, four, or five, six, five, or one chord, whatever it is.

• 34:08Speaker 02

  Inversions are the heart of my music, I think.

• 34:12Sean Hayes?

  I love that.

• 34:13Speaker 02

  Not perversions, inversions, I think.

• 34:15Sean Hayes?

  You know, the first time.

• 34:16Will Arnett?

  I don't, I'm not musically educated enough to.

• 34:19Sean Hayes?

  Nor me.

• 34:20Will Arnett?

  To know me.

• 34:20Sean Hayes?

  But Shawnee is classically trained.

• 34:22Will Arnett?

  I mean, I love music.

• 34:23Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, like, like, like, in two seconds, you could learn C, E, G is a C chord. And if you take the G and you put it in the bottom, all of a sudden, that's a one, six, four. It's, if you're a piano, I could show you in two seconds. You, you guys would learn so fast.

• 34:39Speaker 02

  That's where jazz will come in when you listen to your.

• 34:41Will Arnett?

  Yeah, I think my thing on jazz is it's kind of, I said it's sort of offhand. It's a running joke to like, I can't, that my friend Mark Chaplin, I always have, which Chappy, shout out to Chappy, whether it's cool to say you like it or cool to say you don't. It's just a joke, but it's actually, and his son is at a school taking jazz in London. But I do, I think I don't appreciate it enough and I probably don't know enough about it.

• 35:08Speaker 02

  I'll tell you a story. When I was, I was 14, I was at, it's called a grammar school. I got a scholarship to study there. It's like, and a kind of elite school for poor kids. And I would take my guitar and one afternoon, I was playing in the classroom and this older kid came up and said, you're good. He said, do you like jazz? I said, I don't, I don't, I don't know. He said, I'm gonna give you something. And he gave me an album. He said, listen to it tonight. You won't like it, but listen to it tomorrow night and the next night and the next night. And then you will learn something. So he gave me Thelonious Monk playing a live solo at an Olympia in Paris, right?

• 35:52Speaker 02

  So I put it on, he was right, I didn't like it, kind of really angular, weird, harmony shit. I thought, put it on the next night, a little better. By the third night, I'd opened up a part of my brain that had been closed. And I think it's about exposure to difficult harmony. Without that exposure, you can't hear it. You go, oh, it's, it sounds terrible. But that once you open it, it's the sweetest place to be.

• 36:20Will Arnett?

  Oh, man.

• 36:21Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it's, it's that.

• 36:22Will Arnett?

  I'm literally writing this down.

• 36:23Jason Bateman?

  What is the, I'm also a musical moron, but the stuff that you can easily follow, that you can tap your toe to is what, four four time? Is that, is that right?

• 36:35Speaker 02

  I mean, common time, yeah. Most part maybe is written in four four, yes.

• 36:41Jason Bateman?

  Right. And then, so is it, what is, what is the one that is always surprises you? Is that, was that? Like third?

• 36:50Speaker 02

  Well, it could be five, four, which is like, take, take five is written in five, four. Or I like seven, eight, seven beats in a bar, or I like nine, eight.

• 37:00Jason Bateman?

  And to ding dongs like me, it always sounds like it's a mistake. Like, how do they keep missing this?

• 37:05Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, but three, four is a wall, Jay.

• 37:07Jason Bateman?

  But then to your point, Sting, you, you, it ends up making you a better listener. It trains you, you learn how to appreciate something that's a bit more sophisticated. And consequently, you don't get sick of that song as quickly as you do the other ones.

• 37:22Speaker 02

  You're right. I think the, the brain is split in two, as you know. One part of the brain analyzes or processes very simple intervals, like thirds and fifths. The, the other part of the brain analyzes more complex intervals and more complex rhythms. So unless you've opened one side of the brain or not, and not closed it off, you, you will not be able to appreciate difficult music.

• 37:47Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, and most people don't appreciate those nuances in the seven, eight and the five, four and the six, nine and whatever.

• 37:54Speaker 02

  I do.

• 37:55Sean Hayes?

  I do too.

• 37:56Speaker 02

  If I'm jamming with a guitar, I'm invariably playing in seven.

• 37:59Sean Hayes?

  That's wild.

• 38:00Speaker 02

  I, I don't know it.

• 38:01Sean Hayes?

  Jay, do you know, do you know this, you're gonna make fun of me. Do you know the score of Avita at all?

• 38:07Jason Bateman?

  Uh, I, I do, I, I'll bet I would if you told it to me.

• 38:11Sean Hayes?

  There's one song, I can't remember the lyrics, it was, uh, rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling, one, two, three, one, two, one, two, one, two, three, one, two, one, two, one, two, three. That's seven, eight, right?

• 38:20Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah, that, that sounds like a West Side Story one, or.

• 38:22Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, totally.

• 38:25Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, a little bit, like syncopated. Um, you know, Sting, the first time I ever saw, I was a kid when MTV started. And one of the first things I ever saw was Synchronicity Two video, which is still fresh in my mind, and I love that song, I love that video. Were you someone who embraced the, uh, the advent of video as it marries to, to audio and, and songs? Or did you like, oh, God, I gotta do this? Like, did you hate it or did you enjoy it?

• 38:56Speaker 02

  No, I, I think British bands had a distinct advantage in, in the advent of MTV. Because there was only one kind of pop show in England. It was called Top of the Pops, it was a chart show.

• 39:10Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 39:10Speaker 02

  And if you, if you got into, into the top 20, you, you, you could perform on the show. And if your record went up, you'd perform the next week. But if you were on tour, you had to make a video. So it was, and they'd show, they'd show the video. So we had all of these examples of videos we'd made when we couldn't turn up to actually do the show. That immediately went onto MTV, so we were well-practiced.

• 39:39Jason Bateman?

  Oh, wow.

• 39:40Speaker 02

  So that was, uh, the second British Invasion was due to that fact.

• 39:45Jason Bateman?

  Was that the, was that? Yeah, that's cool. Could that be, was that the first time you were in front of the camera? And, and started to maybe even have the, the spark of acting?

• 39:58Speaker 02

  No, no. I said I had a lot of jobs. I was trying to make a living in London. I modeled for a while and I was, I went to an advertising agency. And I was modeling a, I think it was some kind of jewelry thing and I was a punk. And it was shot by Ridley Scott.

• 40:18Jason Bateman?

  Wow, wow.

• 40:20Speaker 02

  Who had a, had a company called RSA.

• 40:23Jason Bateman?

  Sure.

• 40:24Speaker 02

  And I, I did a lot of work for them as a kind of model on film.

• 40:29Jason Bateman?

  But wait, so these, were these, was it print? Were these, were stills or was it a movie?

• 40:34Speaker 02

  No, this, this was, this was for advertising in cinemas, so in between movies.

• 40:40Jason Bateman?

  So then, so then the, the, the concept of striking a pose, making a face, conveying a mood, a tone through movement, through expression, body language, et cetera. That was, that was interesting to you? Did it, did it have anything to do with performing on stage? When you're doing music, like, I guess what I'm, I'm sort of prodding, I'm trying to, what is your attraction to acting? And does it, is it a cousin to what you like doing on stage?

• 41:08Speaker 02

  I think I've been posing my entire life.

• 41:11Jason Bateman?

  We all, we all do it. We all have.

• 41:13Speaker 02

  You know, I, I think I invented blue steel, frankly.

• 41:18Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, you are, you are the originator of many things.

• 41:21Speaker 02

  And, yeah. Plus I was in, in Zoolander 2 as well.

• 41:25Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah. With, with Mr. Justin Theroux, we had a lot to do with those, yeah.

• 41:30Speaker 02

  Who actually proposed in my house.

• 41:33Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 41:34Speaker 02

  And he said to me, do you think I should marry this girl? I said, well, if you don't, I will.

• 41:41Jason Bateman?

  Is that true? Did he really propose in your house?

• 41:44Speaker 02

  Would I lie to you?

• 41:47Speaker 02

  No, it's true. He comes to stay with us in Italy, in Tuscany.

• 41:52Sean Hayes?

  That's amazing.

• 41:55Will Arnett?

  You know, it's funny, the police, I mean, how many records did you guys release? Five in five years, is that right? Something like that?

• 42:03Speaker 02

  I don't remember.

• 42:03Will Arnett?

  But, yeah. I mean, it's really, I think your last, was your last record? Synchronicity?

• 42:12Speaker 02

  I think it was.

• 42:12Will Arnett?

  Yes, it was. And that was like 1983?

• 42:16Sean Hayes?

  Wait, that was the last one?

• 42:17Will Arnett?

  Yeah, I know, isn't that, isn't that amazing?

• 42:20Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, but then, but then going into, yeah, go.

• 42:23Will Arnett?

  And then, and then you went into, right, and then you went into everything else and all your...

• 42:27Jason Bateman?

  A stratospheric solo career.

• 42:29Will Arnett?

  Of course. And, and do you, did it feel like you were going into a different phase? Like, did it feel totally different coming out of being part of a band? And then going on on your own, was it just like a...

• 42:44Will Arnett?

  What was that like?

• 42:45Speaker 02

  Again, it was kind of strategic, you know, and kind of counterintuitive. You know, why would you leave the biggest band in the world at its peak?

• 42:56Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 42:56Speaker 02

  I said, well, after this, everything's going to be diminishing returns. I want to start the adventure again and take that risk. And also, if I don't leave now, I'll never be able to leave.

• 43:10Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 43:11Speaker 02

  You know, I mean, I love The Stones, The Stones are fantastic, but they are welded together.

• 43:17Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 43:18Speaker 02

  They are. I wanted to leave the band before that weld was entirely... I just wanted some freedom.

• 43:27Jason Bateman?

  Right, right. Yeah, and the music, while it, while it was...

• 43:34Jason Bateman?

  Different, it's still, there was, there was always a complexity to what you guys were doing just as a three man band. And when you went off and created another band, yes, it was, it was titled just your name, but the musicians you put together were just incredible. And that band as a unit made some incredibly complicated music. I was so glad to see the, what was the name of the documentary of the recording of Dream of the Blue Turtles?

• 44:04Speaker 02

  Bring on the Night.

• 44:05Jason Bateman?

  Bring on the Night. Oh, fuck, I loved that movie. And watching you guys, it was in some gorgeous chateau or manor or something, was just watching you guys do what you did. There was such a, yes, you were the leader, but the, the sharing, the camaraderie that you, that you created with them. It was so nice to see you guys all working together as co-equals to create what you guys did.

• 44:31Speaker 02

  You know, one of my strategies has always been to, to play with musicians who are better than me, so that I would have to raise my game. That was true with the Police, that was true with the Blue Turtles, and it's true now.

• 44:46Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 44:47Speaker 02

  I'm still struggling, I'm still struggling to maintain my position, because I have people who are way better than me.

• 44:53Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah, so talk, talk to us about that, about, about 3.0, and about what, what excited you about creating that, and what's, what's, what's the goal there?

• 45:04Speaker 02

  The goal was, was really to strip the songs down to their bare skeletal form, and see if they were still sturdy enough to stand without all that flesh on it. And low and behold, there's so much air around the instruments and clarity, that it is both louder and quieter at the same time. The dynamics are much more extreme.

• 45:29Jason Bateman?

  Meaning, meaning that you've taken just the three, three, three fellas, and you've stripped away a bunch of other things. And when you say the songs, you're talking about songs that include the entirety of your, of your career, or just recently, or what?

• 45:43Speaker 02

  Just take, take away the keyboard parts, all the layered synthesizer parts, the strings, and you're just left with guitar, bass, drums, and a voice.

• 45:51Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 45:52Speaker 02

  It's amazing how sturdy those songs are.

• 45:55Jason Bateman?

  I bet. I mean, it's such a testament to, to them, themselves, you know, the songs themselves. Are you still on tour with that?

• 46:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, in between, in between shows with The Last Ship, I'm touring with a band. I'm trying to keep both, both things in there because I love them both.

• 46:12Jason Bateman?

  You just announced new dates, right? I think there's going to be a domestic or a US tour in May, I want to say?

• 46:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, um, May, and May and then November.

• 46:22Jason Bateman?

  Wow, right, right, right.

• 46:23Speaker 02

  I'm coming back for the midterms.

• 46:27Jason Bateman?

  We need you.

• 46:30Sean Hayes?

  We'll be right back.

• 46:34Sean Hayes?

  Instagram teen accounts have automatic protections on by default. Built-in content settings for the content teens can see, contact limits for who can contact them, and time management tools like daily time limits and sleep mode. Teens are automatically placed into teen accounts, and teens under 16 will need a parent's permission to change any of these settings to be less strict. Instagram will continue adding built-in safety features to help create age-appropriate experiences. Learn more about teen accounts and Instagram's ongoing work to protect teens online at instagram.com/teenaccounts.

• 47:17Sean Hayes?

  This episode of Smart List is brought to you in part by SkinnyPop popcorn. Sometimes when you're in the snacking mood, it's easy not to have to think. Snacking should be simple, like SkinnyPop popcorn. It's made with quality ingredients and still delivers delicious flavor. Start with original SkinnyPop. It's made with just three simple ingredients, so you don't need a science degree to understand what's in it. Feeling fancy but not too fancy? Give white cheddar a try. The sweet and salty kettle is always a family favorite. And the butter variety, it never fails for nights that involve a couch, a screen, and absolutely nowhere else to be. No matter the pick, SkinnyPop delivers light, airy, and endlessly delicious popcorn you can feel good about. Almost every night at my house is movie night,

• 48:01Sean Hayes?

  and that's when I grab the butter SkinnyPop. It's so delicious. Deliciously popped, perfectly seasoned SkinnyPop. Popular for a reason.

• 48:14Sean Hayes?

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• 48:50Jason Bateman?

  All right, back to the show.

• 48:54Will Arnett?

  Mixed in all of this, it should be noted, you've spent a lot of your time throughout your life devoted to activism for a lot of different causes.

• 49:05Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 49:06Will Arnett?

  Like serious...

• 49:07Jason Bateman?

  Rainforest.

• 49:08Will Arnett?

  Well, yeah, I remember the, what was it? The...

• 49:11Jason Bateman?

  Live Aid.

• 49:12Will Arnett?

  The secret policeman's...

• 49:13Jason Bateman?

  Sigourney's Other Ball.

• 49:14Will Arnett?

  Other Ball. You were part of that.

• 49:16Jason Bateman?

  That was the first time you performed solo, is that correct?

• 49:19Speaker 02

  Well, first time since I became famous, yeah.

• 49:21Will Arnett?

  Yeah, yeah. But you did that, and Band-Aid, and all these, and then you've continued. Amnesty and stuff over the years. Where does that sort of fit in your life?

• 49:33Speaker 02

  Well, I've always had a social conscience, you know. I think as a member of society, you have a debt to society.

• 49:41Will Arnett?

  No blesso blige.

• 49:42Speaker 02

  No blesso blige, very good, French. It's never been a question for me that I wouldn't be involved in issues like that. And I still am. I mean, I don't write songs that are propaganda, you know. I'm always looking for a metaphor that I can express an idea in without just saying, you know, you're good and you're bad.

• 50:05Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 50:06Speaker 02

  I have to have a metaphor.

• 50:08Will Arnett?

  How are we doing in some of those areas that you're passionate about? The rainforest and others?

• 50:17Speaker 02

  Well, it's pretty bleak, to be honest with you. You know, we...

• 50:24Speaker 02

  Protected an area of the rainforest, my wife and I, the size of Belgium and the Netherlands. And then with the Bolsonaro government, they just made incursions into that protectorate. And so it's bleak. It's not a good picture at the moment.

• 50:43Jason Bateman?

  Do you think that, speaking of AI, do you see AI as something that could be helpful in something like that?

• 50:51Speaker 02

  Well, I mean, if it's truly intelligent, it will tell us to stop burning the rainforest, stop polluting our rivers.

• 50:58Jason Bateman?

  And it may come up with some sort of an alternative. I get why you're burning it because you need X, but here's another way you could get X.

• 51:05Speaker 02

  Yeah. Maybe that would be useful. Or, you know, medical research, I'm sure.

• 51:10Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 51:10Will Arnett?

  Jason, I'm really, I'm applauding your optimism right now.

• 51:13Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 51:15Will Arnett?

  This is a new.

• 51:16Jason Bateman?

  I did see, I think I was telling you guys about the documentary I saw the other day. I want to give a little plug to it. It was so fantastic. It's called The AI Doc, with the subtitle of How I Became an Apocalypse Optimist. And it's about a guy who's about to have a child, and he is simply taking the position of the layman and saying to all of these experts, should I be worried about having a kid coming into this world, given what we're hearing? Should I be bullish or pessimistic about AI's contribution to society and mankind? And it was not only a really entertaining documentary, but super educational. And I did come out the other side optimistic. And so I would ask our guest here,

• 52:00Jason Bateman?

  you know, maybe specifically to music, but also just in general, if you're willing to give us your hot take on what you think AI is gonna do for us.

• 52:11Speaker 02

  Well, I'll speak about my field. Talk about music. You know, AI can. Create perfectly serviceable pop music that you would hear in a hotel lobby.

• 52:21Will Arnett?

  Right.

• 52:21Speaker 02

  Or an airport. But there's a difference between listening to something and hearing something. So I'm saying you'll hear that in an airport. I will know it's AI almost immediately. But will I listen to it? No. What I'm listening for in a piece of music created by a human being is that that human being has lived a life. That human being has had its heart broken, has been in love. A machine can't do that. A machine doesn't have a family history, good or bad. It's just a set of other people's memories. So I don't think we are in danger of losing that. I think people will know that this is a machine that's singing to them and it's not real. I hope so anyway.

• 53:07Will Arnett?

  And do you think that maybe, hopefully, one of the byproducts will be that people will really celebrate and really there will be a premium for live experiences with other human beings? Like that will be hopefully one of the byproducts.

• 53:24Speaker 02

  I agree. Also, you're competing with a kind of perfectionism that machines can give you. Now, I think artists in the 19th century, visual artists, were challenged by the invention of photography. That could create reality in such a detailed way. So instead of trying to compete, they created the Impressionist movement. They weren't painting objects anymore, they were painting the light around objects. And that, I think, human beings will sidestep that perfection to create something better.

• 53:57Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it's almost going back to what we were talking about with jazz. It's jazz by intention and by definition is improvisational and is meant to sort of mess it up a little bit. Like, you know, you can play the four-four time and make it all work, but it takes a real master to kind of identify the gray areas around that and kind of bend it and tweak it a little bit and then re-arrive at something that's perhaps a little bit more predictable and then break it again. Without a a computer would be able to be that sophisticated.

• 54:28Sean Hayes?

  We have to go, we have to go through whatever phase this is in humanity of this AI to come back and look. Vinyl's back, like everything comes back, you know?

• 54:38Will Arnett?

  Well, yeah, think about vinyl. I mean, when we went to, what was your feeling when when they started going digital to sort of CDs and stuff? And that kind of compressed sound and all that, how did that affect?

• 54:48Speaker 02

  I mean, we kind of enjoyed it and I I liked CDs, but there's something uncanny about digital silence. Instead of that that white hissy noise you get when you put a record on, which is kind of comforting.

• 55:01Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 55:02Speaker 02

  Digital silence is very spooky.

• 55:05Sean Hayes?

  It's kind of like film too, right? Where you you actually see film, you see some of the hair and some of the the noise on the on the image, whereas the the digital stuff is so.

• 55:14Will Arnett?

  And also the experience of like going out when I was a kid and and forgive me again for like going out and buying one of your records. And the day it came out and and cutting the the the the plastic on it. And yeah, the cellophane and then taking it out and putting it on the record player and looking at the lyrics and singing. And that was the only connection that you had and it was so exciting. You know, you're like, I just went out and I got the new Sting record. I got the new Police record like I, you you know, that experience. Where we're robbing ourselves of these experiences.

• 55:46Speaker 02

  An entire world, you know, I mean, you you can you can stream songs now, but they don't tell you who played bass on them. They don't tell you who was the engineer, you know, where it was made. It's just, it's just a product like coffee. It's it's a commodity. So you need that information and an album cover's satisfied an entire generation of which I'm part of.

• 56:07Sean Hayes?

  I remember that, yeah.

• 56:07Speaker 02

  That was our world.

• 56:09Will Arnett?

  Yeah, you'd listen and stare at the stare at the album cover for hours as you were to every detail of it.

• 56:15Sean Hayes?

  I did that with the Carpenters. I used to listen to the Carpenters so much.

• 56:18Will Arnett?

  Move on.

• 56:25Jason Bateman?

  Hey Sting, are we ever gonna see you do some acting again? Cause you're a great actor.

• 56:34Speaker 02

  I'm acting in my play. I'm in my play.

• 56:37Jason Bateman?

  Yes, and I'm gonna come see that. I'll be the guy in front heckling and judging.

• 56:42Will Arnett?

  Will you go see him backstage, Jason?

• 56:44Jason Bateman?

  I'm gonna go. I'm gonna come see you backstage, which I always find is a little sweaty, but I'm told that's what the polite thing is to do. Do you like that? Do you like people coming backstage?

• 56:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, I do.

• 56:55Jason Bateman?

  What you do? You're not exhausted and you just wanna go home? Or you want?

• 56:58Speaker 02

  No, I want adulation.

• 57:00Jason Bateman?

  Alright, I'm gonna come back. I'm just gonna just fawn all over you.

• 57:03Will Arnett?

  Sting, you need to know that this is a thing for Jason that we've been through for years about the question as to whether or not to go backstage. What about after a concert?

• 57:11Jason Bateman?

  Oh?

• 57:11Speaker 02

  Yeah. Well, actually, I usually leave the building immediately in case they want their money back. So, but the last shit, they don't. They just come and...

• 57:22Sean Hayes?

  So Sting, you know, we just listed all of the things that you do and that you don't. It just seems like you're the hardest working person in the world. I mean, what do you?

• 57:33Speaker 02

  Did you say hardest looking?

• 57:34Sean Hayes?

  Hardest working.

• 57:36Speaker 02

  Okay, I'll take both.

• 57:39Will Arnett?

  Hardest working person. Hardest looking.

• 57:41Sean Hayes?

  Just with all the charity work you do, all the concerts you do, you're doing a live show, you're doing a tour, you're writing more albums. It's just endless. It's incredible. Like you said, your work ethic is just incredible.

• 57:53Jason Bateman?

  The question is, yeah, when are you an idiot? Right? Yeah. What do you do that's just dumb as shit?

• 58:00Speaker 02

  And agreeing to do this show, maybe?

• 58:02Will Arnett?

  Yeah, there you go. The regret must be immense.

• 58:07Jason Bateman?

  You saw the title of it. You said, "Perfect, that's me."

• 58:10Speaker 02

  Smart less.

• 58:12Jason Bateman?

  Like, do you have any guilty sort of that my brain needs to rest and do?

• 58:18Speaker 02

  Of course I do, but I'm not gonna tell you.

• 58:21Jason Bateman?

  Come on.

• 58:21Sean Hayes?

  Oh, no, you gotta tell us.

• 58:23Jason Bateman?

  Sean likes Candy Crush on his phone.

• 58:26Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 58:26Speaker 02

  I've no idea what that is.

• 58:28Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it's some dumb little game. But I would imagine, or is it just nice long walks with the great Trudy Styler? And just sort of...

• 58:37Speaker 02

  You know, I'm very gifted in life to have this beautiful woman who's been my partner for over 45 years. That's like, you know, since the Second World War. And we just have a great time. We love each other. I mean, I only stay here for six weeks, actually, because I'm going to Australia tomorrow to do The Last Ship, so.

• 58:56Jason Bateman?

  That's too long, right? I bet you guys, you guys have like a two-week rule like the rest of us? Are you good about keeping that?

• 59:04Speaker 02

  Normally, but this is a long, a long period, so.

• 59:07Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. Yeah, it's a long. It's a long time. What do you think about doing the show night after night? Like I always say, the hardest part is if, if you're feeling like shit or you got a stomach ache or a headache or whatever, you have to keep, you have to go on.

• 59:20Speaker 02

  You know, there are two plays going on with The Last Ship. There's one that's on stage that the audience sees. There's another one behind the stage. You meet little cliques in, behind the stage at a certain point in the play, and that's when you sing along with the person in, you know, in front of the stage, or you have a hand clapping competition. There's little rituals that you never stop. You're doing both plays, and I know where I have to be, and we all do that.

• 59:47Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. Are you excited about, have you, have you played the Met before with anything?

• 59:52Speaker 02

  I've, I've, I've performed at the Met with, with my band a couple of times, but this is the first time I've actually been in a play in the Met, and it's a massive theatre. But the set of the play is so huge. We are recreating a shipyard, and it has an operatic scale, which is, I mean, it's not an opera, but it has an operatic scale. Also, I think it has the emotional ambition of an opera. It's a very emotional play.

• 1:00:21Jason Bateman?

  I can't wait to see this. Yeah. And, and so did, did the, did the, did the sets change for the Met? Were, are they built bigger? Are they more gerbatic? Are they more operatic because of that venue?

• 1:00:32Speaker 02

  They're bigger because of the venue. We, we started out in Amsterdam, and then we were in Paris in massive halls, and it really works.

• 1:00:43Jason Bateman?

  What about, what about writing an, an opera? Or, or, or writing a symphony? Is that, is any of that interesting to you?

• 1:00:54Speaker 02

  I'm a songwriter and The Last Ship is a song cycle, you know, with a theatrical component to it. But to write an opera, I'm not qualified to do that.

• 1:01:09Will Arnett?

  That feels like a pretty hard no. I'm just remembering Sting, your performance in one of my favorite films, which is Quadrophenia.

• 1:01:19Speaker 02

  Well, I was in that film long enough to make an impression, but not long enough to blow it.

• 1:01:25Will Arnett?

  No, but it's such a great film. Have you guys ever seen that, Quadrophenia?

• 1:01:30Sean Hayes?

  No.

• 1:01:30Jason Bateman?

  As little pieces. I would love to see more acting out of you.

• 1:01:34Speaker 02

  Well, that was during the period when I was modeling and just doing anything, you know, trying to get a gig in a cocktail bar. So I would do anything. And this agent called me up and said, do you want to go for Quadrophenia? I said, nah, I'm washing my hair. But she said, no, go.

• 1:01:51Sean Hayes?

  I loved the original Dune. I loved you in the original Dune. Have you seen the new ones?

• 1:01:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:01:56Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, they're pretty cool.

• 1:01:57Speaker 02

  I did.

• 1:01:57Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, they're pretty cool.

• 1:01:58Speaker 02

  I think Austin Butler was playing me in the new one.

• 1:02:00Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, for sure. It's great.

• 1:02:03Will Arnett?

  Two handsome guys, two handsome guys, Sting.

• 1:02:05Jason Bateman?

  See, that's right.

• 1:02:06Speaker 02

  I mean, their version wasn't as camp as ours, I have to tell you.

• 1:02:09Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, that's true.

• 1:02:11Jason Bateman?

  It was David Lynch, wasn't it?

• 1:02:13Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:13Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. Well, I can't thank you enough for spending time with us.

• 1:02:18Will Arnett?

  Oh, my gosh, what a thrill.

• 1:02:20Jason Bateman?

  And letting us peek behind the curtain a bit with your brilliance, your accomplishments. I mean, is there, is there, is there anything we should keep our knees bent for that you're going to try to also perfect? I mean, everything you've done, it's all been so different and so incredible. Is there, is there a challenge for you out there left?

• 1:02:45Speaker 02

  I think the basis of all art. Not to be pretentious, but it is surprise.

• 1:02:52Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:53Speaker 02

  Uh, in a composition, you wanna surprise people within four bars. Or, you know, a piece of writing, you wanna surprise people within the first few sentences. So I'm hoping to surprise myself about what, what is next. I don't know what is next.

• 1:03:08Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:08Speaker 02

  But I, I have to have surprise. I have to have novelty. I have a very low threshold for boredom.

• 1:03:15Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:15Speaker 02

  So I need to be surprised.

• 1:03:18Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. And I would imagine, I hope the answer to this is yes, that you have allowed yourself to be satisfied and yet even proud of, of what you've done and that you need not prove anything to yourself or to us. Uh, and that, that it's just all just sort of for, for fun going forward. Do you allow yourself the, the, the observation of accomplishment? Uh, I mean, it's just been incredible.

• 1:03:45Speaker 02

  I mean, I'm a very fortunate man in every, you know, important field.

• 1:03:52Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:52Speaker 02

  I have a family, I have a wife, uh, and a career.

• 1:03:56Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:57Speaker 02

  And yeah, I've been, I've been very fortunate.

• 1:03:59Jason Bateman?

  Well, we're very fortunate to have received it all. So thank you and please keep it going.

• 1:04:03Sean Hayes?

  I could ask you about, like, I mean, I, it's, when you, when I meet somebody like you, it's so massively iconic. I just wanna talk to you about how every, what's the story behind every hit song that you ever wrote? Would you take, would you take hours and hours?

• 1:04:19Speaker 02

  You know what? I, I do a show on my own in a smaller venues where it affords the opportunity to give context to the songs. Say, okay, I, I wrote it in, in the flat in Bayswater. Or this, this is what inspired me or how it was written. And I think that context makes the songs richer.

• 1:04:38Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:39Speaker 02

  But you can, you can't do that in an arena or a stadium, obviously. But in a, in a small place with maybe a hundred people. You can really create the world that the songs came from.

• 1:04:50Will Arnett?

  And you will still do that, you'll still do that from time to time?

• 1:04:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, I did one two weeks ago.

• 1:04:55Will Arnett?

  Oh, man, I want to come and see that.

• 1:04:56Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, is that, that's not, that's not Sting 3.0, is it? Is there some of that in that?

• 1:05:01Speaker 02

  It's just sometimes I'll do a one-off, just to do an hour of my songs and stories.

• 1:05:07Will Arnett?

  Love to see that.

• 1:05:08Jason Bateman?

  Ooh, that would be good. I would like that.

• 1:05:11Will Arnett?

  Thank you so much, man, honestly.

• 1:05:13Jason Bateman?

  Really appreciate the time.

• 1:05:14Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:15Jason Bateman?

  Thank you. I'll be banging on your dressing room door in a couple of months. Pretend you remember me.

• 1:05:24Speaker 02

  Please do.

• 1:05:25Sean Hayes?

  I might be with him.

• 1:05:26Speaker 02

  Please do.

• 1:05:27Jason Bateman?

  All right, well, you enjoy the rest of your day. Thank you again for joining us.

• 1:05:31Speaker 02

  Thanks, guys. I have my cover.

• 1:05:34Sean Hayes?

  You can just slam it, right?

• 1:05:37Jason Bateman?

  Really appreciate the time, Sting. Good luck with Sting 3.0 and The Last Ship.

• 1:05:43Speaker 02

  That was fun. Thank you so much.

• 1:05:45Jason Bateman?

  All right.

• 1:05:45Sean Hayes?

  Cheers, bud.

• 1:05:46Jason Bateman?

  Bye. Thank you.

• 1:05:47Will Arnett?

  Bye.

• 1:05:50Will Arnett?

  Wow, Jason.

• 1:05:51Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, how about that?

• 1:05:52Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, when he, when he, when he popped up, well, when you said how many Grammys he won, I'm like, who is this?

• 1:05:59Jason Bateman?

  Seventeen Grammys, 100 million records.

• 1:06:02Sean Hayes?

  That's unbelievable. That's unbelievable.

• 1:06:05Jason Bateman?

  I think he's like close to EGOT level and I just, he's across, as I said, he literally started in 1969. So that was the year I was born. And as young as I can remember, he has been the guy. And is across all of my years of music appreciation, every single year I've liked listening to music, he's had music that I love listening to.

• 1:06:32Sean Hayes?

  I love that. Yeah, that's great. Wait, 69 was the year he started?

• 1:06:36Jason Bateman?

  He started, started performing.

• 1:06:38Sean Hayes?

  With the Police, or?

• 1:06:41Jason Bateman?

  No, started performing music, I guess as a kid or learning the music.

• 1:06:45Will Arnett?

  The Police was like 1978, I think.

• 1:06:47Sean Hayes?

  Okay, okay.

• 1:06:47Jason Bateman?

  I think that, yeah, that sounds about right.

• 1:06:49Will Arnett?

  Something like that.

• 1:06:49Sean Hayes?

  How do you know that well?

• 1:06:50Will Arnett?

  Because I'm, you know how crazy I am with the, I, I, all those records were just so important to me, like everybody else. I'm not, I'm not unique in that way.

• 1:06:58Sean Hayes?

  And even if you're not a fan, which I can't believe anybody isn't, you know all his songs.

• 1:07:03Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 1:07:03Will Arnett?

  Of course.

• 1:07:04Sean Hayes?

  You know what I mean?

• 1:07:04Jason Bateman?

  They're all different. Not one of his songs sounds like The Last, right?

• 1:07:08Sean Hayes?

  Pretty crazy, yeah.

• 1:07:10Jason Bateman?

  And all, and just the police alone, the fact that it was just three of them too, making all those different sounds and, um, I don't know.

• 1:07:17Will Arnett?

  Oh my god.

• 1:07:17Jason Bateman?

  Uh, he's, um, he's really, really impressive and, and, and I'm serious. I would love to see more acting out of him. He does have such a great presence and, um, uh, stillness to, uh, to his, to his acting style, which I'm a big, big fan of. But yeah, what, you know, I was thinking about when I was, you know, doing, you know, my brief, uh, research before this interview. This, this is a perfect example of how freaking lucky the three of us are.

• 1:07:50Sean Hayes?

  I know. I thought that right when he popped on.

• 1:07:52Jason Bateman?

  With this podcast, like, you know.

• 1:07:53Will Arnett?

  Jason and I had the same.

• 1:07:54Jason Bateman?

  Right? I mean, this guy's been like, I've just, um, I was a little, little guy when he was like a god to me and he still is. And like now we get to have him on our show. Like I remember seeing, seeing the police at Hollywood, at Hollywood Park, um, this racetrack here and, and you know, being a mile from the stage, cause it's the closest tickets I could get and there's like the biggest rock star in the world that far away. I'll never get anywhere near somebody like, now is it, so we get to talk to these folks and ask them questions.

• 1:08:24Will Arnett?

  Yeah, I mean, I didn't even have that. I have like, sitting in the living room with my sisters, like listening to the records on the record player.

• 1:08:30Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:30Will Arnett?

  And listen, like the snap, crackle, pop of the record.

• 1:08:33Sean Hayes?

  Totally. Imagine if Karen Carpenter was still alive.

• 1:08:35Jason Bateman?

  Oh, Sean.

• 1:08:36Will Arnett?

  Anyway, moving on, so.

• 1:08:39Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it's, uh, we're truly, truly so lucky.

• 1:08:44Will Arnett?

  I know.

• 1:08:45Sean Hayes?

  I know, I felt that right when he came on, Jay, I was like, wow, this is just incredible.

• 1:08:49Jason Bateman?

  A big thank you to those of you who are listening that, that make it possible for us Sting Dongs to have these childhood dreams come true.

• 1:08:57Sean Hayes?

  Uh, thank you.

• 1:08:58Will Arnett?

  We are very, we are, we, he said he's very fortunate. We are very fortunate that we get to spend time with these incredible people.

• 1:09:06Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:07Will Arnett?

  We're, we're, we're very fortunate in a lot of ways and, and that is really a big one and, uh, I, we're, we're, put it this way, we're not very hard done by.

• 1:09:16Sean Hayes?

  By.

• 1:09:18Jason Bateman?

  Oh, hardened by.

• 1:09:20Will Arnett?

  Hard, hard done, hard done by.

• 1:09:22Sean Hayes?

  Hard done by.

• 1:09:24Jason Bateman?

  Hard done by.

• 1:09:25Sean Hayes?

  Done by.

• 1:09:26Jason Bateman?

  We're done, bye.

• 1:09:33Speaker 04

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• 1:09:39Will Arnett?

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• 1:09:51Speaker 04

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• 1:09:55Sean Hayes?

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