E546 Sand Hands

Theo is back with a solo episode to talk about his Thanksgiving plans, going to see SNL live with Bill Burr hosting, and why he has issues with Ticketmaster. He also responds to some of your voicemails, and calls his brother Zeff. ------------------------------------------------ Tour Dates! https://theovon.com/tour New Merch: https://www.theovonstore.com ------------------------------------------------- Sponsored By: Celsius: Go to the Celsius Amazon store to check out all of their flavors. #CELSIUSBrandPartner #CELSIUSLiveFit https://amzn.to/3HbAtPJ Morgan and Morgan: If you’re ever injured, you can check out Morgan & Morgan. Their fee is free unless they win. For more information go to ForThePeople.com/ThisPastWeekend Valor Recovery: To learn more about Valor Recovery please visit them at https://valorrecoverycoaching.com/ or email them at [email protected] ------------------------------------------------- Music: “Shine” by Bishop Gunn Bishop Gunn - Shine ------------------------------------------------ Submit your funny videos, TikToks, questions and topics you'd like to hear on the podcast to: [email protected] Hit the Hotline: 985-664-9503 Video Hotline for Theo Upload here: https://www.theovon.com/fan-upload Send mail to: This Past Weekend 1906 Glen Echo Rd PO Box #159359 Nashville, TN 37215 ------------------------------------------------ Find Theo: Website: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheoVonClips Shorts Channel: https://bit.ly/3ClUj8z ------------------------------------------------ Producer: Zach https://www.instagram.com/zachdpowers Producer: Nick https://www.instagram.com/realnickdavis/ Producer: Trevyn https://www.instagram.com/trevyn.s/ Producer: Colin https://instagram.com/colin_reiner Producer: Cam https://www.instagram.com/cam__george/ Producer: Ben https://www.instagram.com/benbeckermusic/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Theo Von?

  Alright. Good day. Good day. Um. How are you? How are you? Uh, how are I? How are? How are us? Um. Good to see everyone. Good to be here with you. Happy Thanksgiving. Happy November. Happy existence. You know, that's something as well. Um. This year went, baby. This year. That thing is. This year was just hooked to a dang laser beam. I feel like, what was that? You almost had to slow down the film to even remember the summer.

• 0:46Theo Von?

  It was just.

• 0:49Theo Von?

  This thing was just a, uh. This took the HOV lane this year. Life got roller skates on. Damn it. Life's got just roller skates on. What? I couldn't even, I couldn't even make an accurate police report. On, on, on, on, on April. I couldn't tell you what she looked like. What she was wearing. The officer like, well, can you tell me? April, tell me, you know, how tall I look? I don't know, damn it. It just all went so fast.

• 1:28Theo Von?

  You know, and I don't know if it's just that life feels faster now, but you can't even get your hands on it.

• 1:37Theo Von?

  I mean, it's like just trying to grab sand. You can get some of it, but then it just. It ends up just.

• 1:47Theo Von?

  You just, you just realizing you can't get it. You can't get that grip on it, boy. It's like trying to just do a, um. Uh. What's it called? The guy you go to and you go in his shop or whatever and it's. He pretends like he has a secretary or whatever, but he doesn't. And then you go in there and he lays you down and he like.

• 2:14Theo Von?

  He asks you like a question or something, but you're so nervous that you're gonna get touched or whatever, but what is that, dang it? Um, chiropractor. It's like trying to be a chiropractor on sand.

• 2:30Theo Von?

  You know, you just, you can't move it, you can't control, you just, you think you can and then there's nothing. Um, anyway, I'm rambling, I'm just saying it's been a long year. Um, and I'm happy to be here with you today. And, uh, yeah, just thank you guys for, just your patience on doing solo episodes. I wanted to tape this yesterday, but I just, my, I was just so damn rattled. You ever wake up and you're just damn rattled?

• 3:01Theo Von?

  I mean, it's just like a couple pigeons are just living in your ass. You're just like, what in the hell? And everything's a prop, somebody, you know?

• 3:13Theo Von?

  Somebody comes to the door and they just, you know? This guy came to the door and he was offering pest control or whatever. And I'm like, you know, I, I think they just came, cause I think I have like 11 pest control guys. Because I, you know, I forget and then next thing, you know? Hell, I'll be in my living room reading a book and one of them will just damn just, will just spray for, will just spray for lice right in front of me. He'll spray for lice right across my damn forehead sometimes. Cause I forget, you know, I always forget when they're gonna be here. You, you have that one afternoon, you're doing a cook-off and they show up with those, um,

• 3:53Theo Von?

  with those, uh, those, uh, chigger grenades or whatever, and they're humming those bitches. You know, and your family's out there, you trying to put mustard on something? And the baby's got damn bug gas in his eyes, it's just, I, I just forget. Anyway, the guy came and, um, he had just a, the bug guy, he's like, you know, we can come, we can come 17 times a year, that's what he said. And I was like, dude, I don't want, when I get married, I don't want my wife coming here 17 times a year. You know, so that's not a sales tactic I wanted to hear, but, uh, but the guy had the biggest mustache I'd ever seen in my life.

• 4:40Theo Von?

  And the only thing I could think the whole time he's talking to me is you need to go spray up in that bitch.

• 4:47Theo Von?

  Cause there ain't, there is not a chance in hell. You're not running some kind of damn bug motel right up under your snout daddy.

• 4:59Theo Von?

  There ain't a C N H baby, chance in hell.

• 5:05Theo Von?

  You ain't got a couple of fucking word lice running around up in that uh, in that, up in that trap house you got above your lip daddy.

• 5:16Theo Von?

  So it just, you know. I said, I, you know, I said, I think I work good. You know, we got guys, I got seven guys spraying right now, you know? I could barely talk to the guy. Some guy was spraying right in front of me.

• 5:30Theo Von?

  But yeah, just everything's happened so far. I just get confused. Everything's happened so fast and um, and here we are. And it's November and it's.

• 5:45Theo Von?

  It's like that.

• 5:49Theo Von?

  And I'm sure it's like that for everybody. It's like, okay. Some of you, your kid is, you know. Your kid is aged, has been aged, is aged this year. Like, man, I can't believe it. You know, Genevieve's four now. Or your dad has got to get a hip, got to get a new hip or new neck or whatever. You're like, damn, it's already time next week? Ricky's getting that new neck.

• 6:20Theo Von?

  You know, it's just, things happen fast, you know? Man, it was only seven months ago that uh, we laid my grandmother to rest, you know, just, it's just all these things and life just keeps life and.

• 6:36Theo Von?

  You know, and it's just, um, yeah, it's a lot. It's a lot for everybody. And it's marvelous at the same time. It is existence. That's what it is. Um, but I'm grateful to be here with you guys today. And, uh, just grateful to be taking a moment to think about our lives and what they've been like. Um, I, uh, I want to say thanks. We, it has been a while since we've had a solo episode. I'm still gonna try to do more. Um, I'm, I'm finally having a little more time to start to take care of myself right now. And so that's feeling really good just to be able to relax some.

• 7:18Theo Von?

  Um, what's going on? We had some shows in a lot of places. Thank you guys. It came out out there. We just got off the road out in the Midwest, baby. OH.

• 7:29Theo Von?

  We did it out there, um, on OSU's campus, Grand Rapids, Michigan, baby. Let's go. All over. We went up to, where else? Oh, up in Montana, the, I think I do owe a little bit of maybe an apology to, um,

• 7:49Theo Von?

  um, what is that place called? It's like a place where they have people. Um, oh, Chicago State? No, it's, uh, Colorado State. Colorado Springs. I may owe us, uh, just Colorado Springs and, um, Casper, Wyoming. When I got there, I was dehydrated, man. I mean, I was just, I mean, I, you, you could hear my eyes open. You know, I opened my eyes and they, you could just like, it was loud.

• 8:30Theo Von?

  You know, click, you know, like somebody just hard-earned around, you know, I saw a cat look over at me. Like somebody just been hard-arring at it. And it was just how so dried out. The weather there, it just, the wind up there is nasty up there.

• 8:53Theo Von?

  The wind, it'll, you open your eyes for a second, the wind will get in there and clean them bitches out.

• 9:02Theo Von?

  Next thing you do, I was having to lick my hand and rub it into my eyes. Spitting in my hand and rubbing it in my eyes. And even, you know, you're looking at everybody through damn spit eyes or whatever. And the ladies there like, oh, look at this little bitch with his damn spit eyes. Oh, honky got them spit eyes. But I was just dry as hell. Even the animals up there were dry. You see a damn animal up there, a dog up there, Casper Wyoming, that thing up there just,

• 9:43Theo Von?

  he just, somebody, you, you write water on the ground and a dog come lick on the word. People think it's thirsty as hell up there. I saw a plant, it had grown up my leg and was trying to, uh, drink out of my, uh, I had me a little, uh, canteen. I saw a vine stood somewhere for 30 seconds, a vine grew up my leg. And then it opened the top of my canteen. Yeah, now, everything's thirsty as hell up there. My, it, yeah, it just, it was super dry. It was dry. And I, I just wasn't ready for it. I, I was so dry I could be, like, um, I don't know, I can't even explain it to you.

• 10:26Theo Von?

  You know, I definitely did my best, but they gave you oxygen tanks and like, but the, all the oxygen tank is just a can of just more dry. So you hit that bitch and now you're just, everything, even the animals, they would sound like they were, were dried out like moo. They had a cow, one cow, I saw him.

• 10:54Theo Von?

  Like what? He's like moo. But he was so draw.

• 11:03Theo Von?

  So that was just a, but beautiful country, beautiful place. I just, I, I was shocked at how dehydrated I got IVs up there. It just took me a little bit to get on my feet, man. It was a lot. That was like probably one of the more hectic times that I'd had this year. Um, uh, just health, healthness, you know? And being alive and being like that. Um, I went out to Montana, but all that area, Colorado Springs and thank you for everybody coming out and, um, and Casper, I can't even believe it. I mean, we're in Montana. Wow. That whole, all of those regions. I mean, that's where mother nature just, just tries on her clothes up there, baby.

• 11:49Theo Von?

  It's beautiful. Everything you see is beautiful. You know, it's just, it's remarkable. So to even get to go to that part of the country that people came out, uh, thank you guys so much. To all the places that we went, man. I got to go to, uh, La Crosse, Wisconsin.

• 12:09Theo Von?

  And it's, I, I, it's, uh, it's one of the greatest little city town places I've been.

• 12:17Theo Von?

  I didn't, man, you always, I think of some people in your head, you have ideas of a place that's kind of perfect, you know?

• 12:26Theo Von?

  And they got, you know, somebody's walking their kid home from school or whatever. And the kid's just got a bunch of snot on his face or whatever. But the parent leaves it. Just that, you know, because there's something kind of beautiful about it.

• 12:42Theo Von?

  You know? Especially when you were poor, dude, if your nose was running, I'd let that bitch fly, cut.

• 12:51Theo Von?

  Cause people are always looking at you when you's poor, people always look at you like you ain't got nothing.

• 12:58Theo Von?

  And that's why when, when, when my nose was running, I'd be like, oh yeah, I got this bitch.

• 13:05Theo Von?

  I got this snot.

• 13:09Theo Von?

  So there is something very beautiful about that. Um, but we were, we were there in, uh, La Crosse.

• 13:16Theo Von?

  Or Lacrosse, they say it. Or a lot of gay dudes are, they say it like, hey, I'm in La Crosse. Um. But just beautiful, I mean, just to get to see some of America, man. And, uh, to get to see a lot of you folks and we try to do some meet and greets after the shows and just, we did everything that we could, I promise you that. So thank you guys so much for the support. And, um, yeah, Thanksgiving's just coming in. Trevin, how are you feeling today?

• 13:44Speaker 01

  I'm good, man. A little chilly.

• 13:47Theo Von?

  Oh yeah, brisk out, huh?

• 13:48Speaker 01

  That's for sure.

• 13:50Theo Von?

  And you think it's gonna get worse this year? What are they saying there? And if you're looking at the, uh.

• 13:57Theo Von?

  Diameter or whatever, the air diameter, the.

• 14:01Theo Von?

  The weather, what are they saying?

• 14:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, the weather. Uh, yeah, about the same, gonna get a lot colder, man.

• 14:06Theo Von?

  God!

• 14:07Speaker 01

  Get ready.

• 14:09Theo Von?

  BLM, baby. Brrr, lives matter, son. It's gonna get brisk out. Um, what else has been going on? Oh, I'll tell you, you know what's something that was, I thought was really special? That was, uh, I got to be around or be a part of, um. Or be around, really. Um, so SNL, uh, Saturday Night Live was going on and Bill Burr was gonna be on it. You know, and, uh, and Bill Burr is, there's nobody like him. There's no, I mean, there's nobody like him. He is, he is himself and he is one of one and. I wanted to go see, I'd never been to SNL. I'd never been over there and seen it, you know?

• 14:52Theo Von?

  And so myself, who came with me? Oh, my buddy Kevin and um, and John Farley was there. And that's Chris Farley's brother and uh, and it was just like, man, to be at SNL, you know, where Chris Farley and Spade and Needle and Carvey and all of the like, uh, Rock, um, Sam, just all these wizards of uh, you know, um, possibility, you know, uh, Sherri, um, oh Terry, um, uh, who's the lady that puts her?

• 15:32Theo Von?

  She's always uh, taking her own temperature or whatever and smelling it. Who's that lady?

• 15:38Theo Von?

  Her. She, you know, just, um, just to be at SNL, Saturday Night Live, to be on that stage, just to be at there watching and, and um, and John Farley was there, Chris Farley's brother, and it was the first time he said that he'd been back there since his, uh, since he'd been there with Chris.

• 15:59Theo Von?

  And that was just, I don't know, it was just like, it just, it was just kind of, it felt special, you know? Uh, cause I just can't imagine, I can't imagine having a brother that is,

• 16:13Theo Von?

  you know, so, well, first of all, it's your brother, so they're very important to you, but then also they're such a, uh, entertainer, and then you go back to the place where they, one of the places that they're most known from, you know, and um, yeah, that was just, it was magnificent, man, just to be able to be there with him and he told so many stories, uh, and I was kind of bummed that they didn't bring him out on the stage and, and let him tell a story out there at SNL.

• 16:43Theo Von?

  He, the stories he was telling backstage were better than half of the things that were happening on the tube, I thought. I mean, uh, but also that's, you know,

• 16:54Theo Von?

  I mean, it was just crazy to hear a guy talk about, you know, his brother, Chris Farley and all the, these little moments that they'd had backstage and it's these funny things and,

• 17:05Theo Von?

  here, I'll say this, when it, when it came down to listening to him or watching some of the sketches, I couldn't help but listen to some of the things that he was saying. Because it was, yeah, it just was like, uh, walking through time. And walking through,

• 17:20Theo Von?

  time that really meant something, you know, time between brothers. And so, yeah, that was pretty exceptional. But yeah, I, I was like, SNL should have had him out there. Like, bring this guy. It's the first time he's been back since his brother. It's like the closest Chris Farley will get to being there. And, um, yeah, it was just, I don't know. So, I, I, uh, but that was, it was great. I'm not trying to tell, you know, I don't know. I'm not talking too much or whatever. I don't know. Um, but yeah, that was just, it was, that was something neat to be a part of and what else? I went with my butt. My friend has a son and, and we took him to the swing set and then,

• 18:01Theo Von?

  uh, what else is going on? Oh, I watched the CMAs, uh, Country Music Awards the other night because I'm, you know, I live in Nashville. And so you have to watch it or you, people won't look you in the eyes for the, for the next year. And so, you know, I was checking it out and Caleb Presley was on there doing presentation.

• 18:26Theo Von?

  Laney Wilson was on there. So it's like, you know, I gotta peep it. I wanted to see if Jesse Murph was gonna be there. Uh, Jelly Roll was there. That whole gang, baby. Jelly Roll, Yellow Wolf. I think they had damn Jelly Wolf there. And it's just that, that is just a Saint Bernard with a, a couple of face tats on him, you know, but that whole like, uh, musically recovering honky vibe, you know, that's really powerful. And Yellow Roll, I saw damn Yellow Roll. And it was, um, Bobby Lee was there. So it's just, you know, yeah, he's doing music now. So it just, you know, it's just, there's a, anyway, it was a very diverse group over there and uh, what am I talking about, damn it?

• 19:08Theo Von?

  Oh, but I watched because I wanted to see if um, Red Clay Strays were gonna win. They were up for vocal group, which what does that even mean? Kind of it's all music, you know, but um, they didn't win. Old uh, Dominyan won it, right? And Dominyan, no disrespect, right? Uh, I haven't heard a lot, you know, I don't think, first of all, if you look at uh, old Dominyan, they, Dominyan is a brother's name.

• 19:44Theo Von?

  And it's, you know, show me thirty Dominyans and I'll show you, you know, how to get, how to get to Memphis, you know what I'm saying, bro? It's like, let's be realistic, baby. That's Elvis's neighbors, homie, okay? So, and so that was the way, I'm like, damn, they don't even, somebody's hiding, they're hiding, they're hiding a brother amongst the four or five of the guys that they have in the group or whatever, but um, yeah, I just wanted to see Red Clay Strays win. And I thought it was just a chance for, see, you know, see, I'm like, here you have a vibe, you know, and no disrespect to um, to OD, baby, but you have a vibe, Red Clay Strays, they,

• 20:29Theo Von?

  they sing, they sing prayers, man. They sing things that I can't, they sing prayers that I can't even make.

• 20:39Theo Von?

  That I can't even make the words to, they sing those and I just feel like that's part of such a movement. And so, yeah, I think I really wanted them to win that um, award. But also then, Red Clay Strays, are they a country group?

• 20:56Theo Von?

  And you could argue that it's all of it.

• 21:00Theo Von?

  Are they gospel? You know, I mean, they're music and it doesn't need a space to fit in, you know? You don't need to put every uh foot in a shoe, but it's like, well, yeah, what are they? But it's a lot of uh. It's a lot of vibrant prayer. I feel like coming out of those boys. And I'm partisan as well, or partisan or whatever. Um, anyway, that's some of the stuff that's been going on um recently. And a lot more, some of it I can't remember. Um, but yeah, or just to see me as I felt like they had a chance to pull some new blood in there. And uh.

• 21:45Theo Von?

  And I just didn't see that, you know, but. But what do I know? I don't know shit. You know, I'm just a loud honky overha. That's all I am. What else? Um, Grand Rapids, beautiful place. Beautiful place, man. Just uh. Yeah, just to see a lot of places where people are just thriving and people are saying, hey, this is our community. And we're going to keep it like it is, man. That's something that that really uh felt great to witness. Well, now it's that holiday season. It's time for family and food and let's be honest, a little bit of chaos. But hopefully the most chaotic thing that happens this year is you slurping down a little bit of oyster dressing.

• 22:30Theo Von?

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• 23:12Theo Von?

  If you're ever injured, you can check out Morgan and Morgan. Their fee is free unless they win. For more information, go to forthepeople.com/thispastweekend or dial pound law, pound 529 from your cell phone. That's F O R the people.com/thispastweekend or pound law, pound 529 from your cell. This is a paid advertisement. Um, what else? It's Thanksgiving, guys. That's what it is, you know? And that's the week it is. And, and it's a time, um,

• 23:55Theo Von?

  you know, Thanksgiving is, it's wild that our, that our calendar, that even, even our calendar, right? Our setup, our framework, our time-based framework for our society and for civilization has a stop time in it to give thanks. It's interesting that even time says, hey, hold on. I need you to give some thanks. I need you to, you have to have some gratitude here. You know, and I think that that, to me, that's pretty fascinating that that is a speed bump that's been put into our calendar.

• 24:40Theo Von?

  It's just built in there. You know, it's a comma that says, hey, care, right? Care about the things that have happened to you. You know, find things to have gratitude for. Um, and see, I want to think about those today and just things that I'm thankful for. Um, I'm thankful, um, yeah, being able to whisper, that's a big one. I'm so thankful for that. Because otherwise, everybody in your family would just wouldn't know how you felt about them.

• 25:19Theo Von?

  So I'm just so thankful that

• 25:22Theo Von?

  that God lets us whisper, you know, um, I'm thankful, uh, for my family, you know, I'm thankful that my sister makes me laugh a lot. And that she likes to laugh, uh, I like listening to her laugh sometimes. Um, she's ridiculous and that makes me laugh. Um, I'm thankful my nephew talks to me. You know, I wish he kind of hit my line more, but I guess he's busy or whatever. Sure, whatever dude. Um, but he's a child, you know, and it's like, I just gotta be an adult and just, just take care of myself. But, um, oh, I'm thankful that urine isn't hotter than it's is when it comes out of your body. That would be,

• 26:04Theo Von?

  that would, that would be crazy, bro. If you were, you know, if urine just came out like even 10 degrees hotter, bro.

• 26:15Theo Von?

  Cause you'd go in the bathroom and they'd have one dude in there about to urinate and everybody else would be supporting him. And like, you come on, Richard. Come on, Richard. Blast that shit, homie. And he'd be like, it's kind of hurt. And you're like, shut the fuck up, Richard. Piss, bitch. And people were like, whoa, chill out, dude. He's fucking, it's hot, you know, and people, and then there'd be a gay dude just kind of holding his back for no reason, just, or even pushing on his butt. That's the weird thing, dude. If you're, if, if you're doing a group piss, right? And everybody's supporting one guy who has to piss. And the dude that's pushing up on the dude's, on the guy's butt.

• 27:00Theo Von?

  That guy is not just trying to be helpful. I know that, boy. So, yeah, I'm grateful that pee pee is at the, or urine or whatever they want to call it, is at a, um, manageable temperature. That's a big one. Um, I'm grateful that God, um,

• 27:20Theo Von?

  that God lets me try, you know, I'm grateful that God lets me try. You know, that, uh, every single thing isn't final.

• 27:32Theo Von?

  Yeah, I'm grateful for that. I'm grateful that um that my arms are, you know, they're not the best. I think they're not the best length. I got I got medium length arms, but I know that they're good enough to hug, good enough. I wouldn't win a hug title or whatever. I don't know if there is a title. Yeah, what else? Let me think. I'll think about some things throughout the show throughout the episode today, uh, things that I'm thankful for, man. I'm thankful that I have some shoes on right now. Um, yeah, I'm thankful. Uh, yeah, I'll keep thinking about it, but let's get into some calls, man. You guys have been hitting the hotline and and I haven't been there. Um, but I just want to thank you for hitting it. And as always, the

• 28:14Theo Von?

  hotline is nine eight five six six four nine five zero three. And let's get to a call right here. Here we go.

• 28:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, I just was, uh, just want to hear your thoughts. Um, twenty eight, this guy out of the Navy. I live in Orange County, California, and

• 28:35Theo Von?

  Thank you for your service, brother. We appreciate you. Onward.

• 28:39Speaker 02

  It's tough making friends as an adult. Um, all my life, I've always ended up with black friends. I play basketball and maybe out of two hundred white guys, five black guys, I ended up being friends with a black guy. But, uh, I want some white friends or like Asian friends. First one is your advice, like, how does that happen? Or do I just stick with this? Hey, that's this is how it is. Like, black friends are my thing.

• 29:07Theo Von?

  No, brother, I don't think that, you know, I don't think I think you can get all types of friends. That is for sure, man, you know. Um, I think, uh,

• 29:21Theo Von?

  you know, basketball is a gateway drug to just a brotherific type shit. Go out into your neighborhood right now, dribble a basketball in the street.

• 29:36Theo Von?

  See if a couple brothers don't show up. You know, that's that, just you hear a basketball banging on that street, that's a, that's the Michael Jordan mating call, cut. You know, that's how it is, man. You put a rim up anywhere and you gonna get some black friends, man. That's not a racial thing, that's just facts. You put a basketball rim up anywhere and you gonna have some brothers show up. You put that bitch up in the ocean, you gonna have, you'll have a couple, couple wet brothers out there just double drowning out there. So you got, you have to think if you want to get different types of folks, you have to put out different types of, uh, activities. You know?

• 30:21Theo Von?

  So see if you want to get more Asian friends, you might want to do a, um, Asian people like hide and go seek. That's easy, man. You know, and that's wild, brother. You know, look at an Asian, look at any, uh, resting or sitting Asian, resting Asian. Or A, you know, AARs or whatever Asians at rest. Look at, look at one. Bring up a couple, right?

• 30:46Theo Von?

  Go to any of these folks and say, you keep counting, I'll go hide. Cause Asians got that clock in them, dog.

• 31:03Theo Von?

  So that's something you could do to meet some Asians right there, man. And also it's okay to be a white guy that has black friends. That's a, you know, and I know you're not saying there's anything wrong with it, but, you know, they had, and when I, you know, when I was getting into life or whatever, they had a lot of Wiggas out there. And no cap, bro. Wiggas used to be the thing, bruh. You know, Thomas Jefferson was a Wigger, bruh. Real talk. And people don't want to, you know, people don't want to say that shit, but he was, man. But now they got Blonkeys even. They got Blonkeys out there. You got a lot of black dudes that want to be white or, you know, or having white, more white stuff go on in them, you know? I mean, I saw a brother crying in his car the other day outside of a Jimmy John's.

• 31:49Theo Von?

  That's the whitest shit you could do. That's our shit. So, it's all good. What I'm saying is the portal is always open, guys. There's no NIL money to have a new friendship in another ethnicity, man. That is, we, you know, we're all bound to be beige in a couple of generations anyway. So, right now, if you want to meet someone of a color or of an ethnicity, then now is the time, baby bear. Cause in two, three generations, everybody gonna be beige, mauve, off mauve, you know? Hook is in chrome. People gonna be all batched out and, uh, genetic modified or whatever.

• 32:31Theo Von?

  You will have a Monsanto, uh, uh, tope friend. You will have an off-brown, uh, white bottom, um, speckled trout, uh, Korean, Mexican, black lady. You're gonna have it all, man. So, if you want to enjoy specific ethnicities now, now is the time to do it because genetically, we're all heading to one color. We're gonna be just one little off-brown, semi-white, matte finish, uh,

• 33:12Theo Von?

  gray baby bear of Christ, brother. Praise God, man. What else do we have? Um, let's take another call right here. Here we go.

• 33:25Speaker 03

  Hi, Theo. Um, me and my family want to invite you to our Thanksgiving dinner. Um, this is Maria Gillan. It will be up in Gallatin, Tennessee.

• 33:35Theo Von?

  Oh, up in Gallatin. Alright, thank you for the invite there.

• 33:40Speaker 03

  And, um, we think you could fit in really well with our family and you would just bring a lot to conversation. And I think it's gonna be some really good food. I can whip up some really good mashed potatoes. So, uh, oh, and I'm making a pasta. That's really good. Anyways.

• 33:59Theo Von?

  Okay. Yeah, y'all them carb dogs up there. Alright, that's beautiful. Um, I cannot make it. I appreciate it though. Very sweet of you. Um, I am, you know what? Here, I'll call you and tell you I can't make it. See if this works.

• 34:17Speaker 04

  Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system.

• 34:24Speaker 04

  Is not available. At the tone, please record your message. When you have finished recording, you may hang up or press 1 for more options.

• 34:33Theo Von?

  What's up you little potato maiden, how are y'all over there? This is Theo. I'm just calling you back, I want to let you know that I can't make it over there. For the Thanksgiving up there in Gallatin. But, um, I appreciate it. And, hope you guys have a wonderful time up there. And, uh, just thanks for thinking of me and thanks for inviting me, that was very nice of you. And, uh, yeah, that's about it, alright, I'm gonna, um, I'm gonna go now.

• 35:00Theo Von?

  Yeah, I'm heading, I'm going down to Lafayette, Louisiana, baby. Dustin Poirier, you know, they, every year they, they, uh, They, they, they put, uh, cooking utensils into his, uh, into his fighting gloves. And he gets out there and he'll beat up a damn meal for you, son. Everything he serves you got a black eye, the black eyed Pease got two black eyes, bro. You're like, dang, someone had broken ribs on them. Look, I didn't even know Pease had ribs. You know, he'll give you a little, uh, turkey leg or something. And it's in a cast. He beating the shit out of everything, bruh, turkey neck and a neck brace. He, that's how he does it, bruh.

• 35:41Theo Von?

  He beat the eggs with his own hands, bruh, I see him, you'll see him in the yard. Out there, he got on his fighting trunks into some, he just, you know, Just putting a bunch of hand action into a damn mixing bowl.

• 35:56Theo Von?

  You know, that's just crazy, man, I've never seen anybody do it like that.

• 36:01Theo Von?

  You'll see him out there fucking calf kicking a rump roast, bro, that's, you're like, what is going on?

• 36:08Theo Von?

  But that's where I'll be, man. That's become a little tradition for me and I'm, it's a blessing. I'm excited about it. And then we have a large show down there. It might be our largest show ever over at the Cajun Dome in Lafayette, Louisiana. And I'm grateful to be from over there. Just got my mother at home over in, uh, in Baton Rouge. My mom just moved back home. So when we got her a house over there and I'm just grateful to that. Thank you, God, for the support over the years and, um, and she hasn't complained about it yet, which is just damn unreal. So, um, what else? Let's take another call. What are you thankful for, Trev? And you got anything that pops into your head, brother?

• 36:53Speaker 01

  Oh, every day, bro. Thankful to wake up, thankful to, you know, have a job, thankful mostly for my, you know, beautiful wife. Shout out to Gabby and our family and yeah, the health.

• 37:08Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's it. That really is true, huh? Having some health, man. Yeah. And taking care of it too. That's another thing. Cause I'll, I'll take, man, I'll take something for granted in a heartbeat.

• 37:22Theo Von?

  I'll take my heartbeat for granted in a heartbeat.

• 37:28Theo Von?

  Oh, something else going on out in the world today. Um, what else? We got a call that came in right here.

• 37:37Speaker 05

  Um, how you doing? This is Michael from Tennessee.

• 37:40Theo Von?

  Hey, Michael.

• 37:41Speaker 05

  I just want to say, I've been thinking about turkey and ham. We didn't have ham at Thanksgiving because apparently ham's a Christmas thing and I love honey ham and all they have is turkey. Turkey's dry and bland as shit, no honey. So I didn't fuck with it. So I just want your opinion.

• 38:01Theo Von?

  Okay, brother. I see you there. I see you having a lot of feelings about it. Um, yeah, turkey or ham? Hmm.

• 38:10Theo Von?

  Well, ham, ham.

• 38:13Theo Von?

  Ham is ham.

• 38:16Theo Von?

  You know, ham, it just, it gets home and it's like, where's your mother? You know, that's ham. But turkey. Tur- tur- turkey, turkey? Turkey's a little more risky, I think, you know, it's a little tur- tur- it's a little more perverted, I think, low key, bruh. Turkey, you know, it's like,

• 38:40Theo Von?

  what you wanna do to me?

• 38:43Theo Von?

  Wanna put me in a sandwich? Wanna put me in the fridge? You want me now? You want me leftover? What do you want? So turkey kinda looking at you like that, I feel like

• 39:00Theo Von?

  ham looks like it's been smoking or whatever. Like, alright, that mu- you know, it'll party, but it's fuck, you know? Y- you know, you're, it's gonna, it can't, it won't be able to drive itself home. Ham, you know? But tur- cuz it drinks, ham drinks. Ham drinks. But turkey is like, it could be anywhere. It could be, turkey, turkey, you'll see, you'll, you'll see turkey in a high heel. You'll see turkey in a high heel, that bit, you know? So that's how I feel, I guess, about that, um. What else? Got a couple more calls that came in here. Um, oh, here's a news story right here.

• 39:44Theo Von?

  Police find two kilogram garden gnome. Made entirely of MDMA, wow. Yep, that's it, man. That's how it is now, baby, baby. They got aliens in the ocean, they got MDMA in the garden gnomes, okay? Tape your eyelids to your ass cheeks, homie. And stay alert.

• 40:13Theo Von?

  Cause they ripping everybody out here.

• 40:18Theo Von?

  Praise God, baby. What else do we have? Hmm. Ah, we got another call that came in right here. Here we go. Let's see, Home for Christmas.

• 40:31Speaker 06

  Yo, Theo, this is Harley from Portland, Oregon, man.

• 40:34Theo Von?

  What's up, Harley? And had a great time up there. We did a show out there in Portland, uh, which is a great city. Let me say that. People are always like, there's Antifa's up there. You know? You know, LARPing in the park. It's just a bunch of leftover Antifa and BLM activists. And people, you know, adults wearing baby diapers up there. LARPing in the park and sword fighting and doing makeshift Renaissance fairs up there and shit. And damn George Foreman grilling every meal and shit. But I thought it was an amazing city. Unbut, I'd never, I just hadn't, it was just, it really shocked me how, how special it was. Yeah, there's a naked guy.

• 41:20Theo Von?

  Pushing himself, you know, pushing himself in a, you know? And he's like, you know, has a boat oar and he's going down the street in a, um, a, uh, adult baby carriage or whatever. But it's, there's, it's awesome. I thought it was really, really groovy. I really like Portland, Oregon. Um. What'd you have to say, brother? Sorry, I interrupted you there. Let's hear more.

• 41:46Speaker 06

  Um, I, I really appreciate the way that, that you peddle your tickets. The way that you, uh, encourage people to not use secondhand sites because, you know, you don't wanna, you don't want people paying more than they should to come see you. I understand that and I really respect that.

• 42:03Theo Von?

  Yeah, totally. Well, a lot of times what happens is people will look up a ticket, right? Wanna go to the show, this city, this date or whatever. And then other secondary sites that are reselling tickets will put them, will pay more to get their searching higher on Google and stuff like that. And so then you click there and you're not really paying in a rigid, you don't even have an option at a, at a regular price ticket if there's still any available. Onward.

• 42:30Speaker 06

  But then I go to your, your website, man, and I see that. Theovon.com/tour is redirected to Ticketmaster. And I'm just curious, man, you know, the people absolutely hate Ticketmaster.

• 42:45Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah. And I'm one of the people, brother. I hate them. I hate them. It's a scam. They've been running this scam forever. So I don't know how we get a politician that is going to break up the monopoly that's very obvious. I don't know how you get that done. You know, I would love to have a ticket broker on this year. Maybe we can find, start delving into the dark depths of all that. Because, yes, it's a monopoly. It's sick. It's sick that you could take three of your friends to a show, but now you can only take one because the fees are astronomical. We don't see any money from the fees. Artists don't. You know, it's just the same people. It's these big companies. Who owns Ticketmaster?

• 43:30Theo Von?

  You look that up for me. Live Nation Entertainment. So there you go. Ticketmaster is a wholly owned subsidiary of Live Nation, which is headquartered in Beverly Hills. Yeah, well, I think one of the issues, who's the owner of Live Nation, I wonder? Vanguard? Well, here's, hey, this is fucking hilarious. Zoom in on this a little bit. Liberty Media Corporation is the largest shareholder of Live Nation Entertainment, owning 30% of the company.

• 44:14Theo Von?

  Other major shareholders include Vanguard owns 8.3%, BlackRock Advisors owns 5.5%. So there you go. It's the same people that own everything. So that's why you're getting fucked because they own everything. They own the building that the show is in sometimes, and then they own the website. And, uh, they don't care. They don't care. That's the bottom line. They don't care. They don't care that it takes more money out of your pocket.

• 44:50Theo Von?

  And mine, if I buy tickets somewhere. They don't, they don't care. They want money. That's all they want. Um, so yeah, that shit hurts my heart, man. Nothing I can do about it, man. You know, and maybe one day there'll be a better way to do it. Uh, I know Zach Bryan tried a unique method through AAX, I think, ticketing. Um, but it hasn't shown up yet, or a way that's definitely definitively saves people that money. Um, but yeah, those people are robbing people. And that's what it is. And, uh, but we have a government that continues to allow that sort of business behavior. Um, especially when they have a monopoly on the market.

• 45:33Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's just, those are my feelings. To me, it feels like it's bullshit. To you calling, I'm sure to everybody listening. I'd love to have an extra forty dollars, uh, from ticketing fees to go get me a Sodi or something. Get me a little, uh, Butterfanger or something. Get mom the payday or whatever she likes eating. She can't even hear the fucking show. She's over here. Cheaper to get her a ticket than put her in dang hospice or whatever.

• 45:57Theo Von?

  You know, she's over here, you know, listening to, uh, whatever we're watching. You know, Metallica on Ice or whatever over here. You know, or Ice Spice on Ice or whatever. Who knows what the hell they're doing now? You know, now it's, they have a new Anxiety on Ice is a new performance for kids. Like what? What are we even fucking taking our kids to? It's Big Pharma Anxiety on Ice. Brought to you by Live Nation and Pfizer, dude. That's what we're fucking doing. I mean. Uh, yeah. People at least aren't blind to it. Um, praise God, brother. Thank you for the call. And yeah, I'm sorry about it too, man. Let me hear the end. Let me hear what you have to say. I'm sorry.

• 46:34Speaker 06

  And I, I personally would not go see a show just because it's being sold strictly through ticket marketing. So I was curious if there was some kind of way that, that we can get away from, from these big corporations and, um, and, and hopefully by getting away from them, you know, you could get, um, more, more of a percentage of ticket sales and that, that.

• 46:54Theo Von?

  Yeah, totally. I mean, those venues, they could give away to something. They could do something. You know, um, they also, yeah, they charge people for parking a lot of times or it's just that's, but some of it is business. But that part I believe is egregious. That's how I feel. But no, as of right now, I don't know another way.

• 47:15Theo Von?

  You know, I could look into it though. Maybe one day I'll have, you know, I could own venues with other people and we could just do the shows there at our own venues. And we wouldn't sell tickets and we wouldn't, uh, gouge people on those prices. Or maybe you'd find one politician that would just run simply on the fact that they're gonna say, hey, fuck those guys. We're not gonna let them do it. We're gonna figure out a way. So it's just those greedy companies and dirty lawyers, I believe. Um, but also there may be stuff I don't know about it. They may need an extra forty-two dollars a ticket

• 47:50Theo Von?

  to send you that email. So I might be off. Um, what else? Sorry. Am I getting negative there?

• 48:02Theo Von?

  Let me think about what else I'm thankful for, man. I'm thankful that, uh, I have buddies that check in on me. I, I, I need to do a better job of that, or I would like to do a better job of that in the coming years, checking in on, uh, people. And checking in on myself. You know, I want to make sure I do a better job of that. Uh, what else am I thankful for? Um, oh, I'm thankful my buddy, uh, Jeremy just had a new baby, his third son.

• 48:31Theo Von?

  Him and his wife Natalie just had a child. And they just have a blessed, just,

• 48:38Theo Von?

  man, him and my buddy Curtis, they, they run a, uh, speed and strength, um, training, a training group over here in Nashville and it just, those guys are like,

• 48:51Theo Von?

  they're like the best part of my week when I get to be over there and just laugh with everybody and we have so much fun and they really uplift a lot of, a lot of the community here. And so, yeah, that's something I'm thankful for, that he had a healthy son. Um, what else am I thankful for? Uh, I'm thankful I got to go to my buddy Scott's wedding this year. I'm thankful I got to see my friend the other night. Um.

• 49:20Theo Von?

  I'm thankful that God lets me think about other people and that I can try hard, that I can, you know, that if there's patches where I go through where I get stuck, stuck in myself, that I can come out of those, you know, we're not so, every thought doesn't have to be a sentence, like a life sentence, you know, or that every feeling isn't like a life sentence. Even though there are moments sometimes where they think, it feels like they might be, they're not.

• 49:46Theo Von?

  I'm thankful you can see somebody that'll change your vibe, you know, or change, you can hear a song that'll change your energy, and you can choose to hear those things too.

• 49:58Theo Von?

  What else? Yeah, I'm thankful that some of the mistakes I've made haven't,

• 50:03Theo Von?

  haven't put me in places that make things very tough on me from day to day. You know, that's been a lot of grace from God in those spaces.

• 50:18Theo Von?

  What else? What do you think about Trevin? Any other thing else, any other gratitudes coming into your head?

• 50:25Speaker 01

  Thankful for friends, like you said, being able to, be able to think about, you know, being grateful in itself, you know what I mean? Being able to take the time to.

• 50:36Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm thankful God lets me see different things or whatever, see animals, bro. I would hate that shit if you're at the zoo and your people are just telling you what the animals look like or whatever, and then the guy starts touching you on the back or whatever, like this guy's a pedophile or whatever, you know, who, who am I even with, dude? That's the kind of scary shit that's out there. What else do we got?

• 51:12Theo Von?

  Oh, here we go, right here, gang shit, let's hear this one. They say harmful.

• 51:19Speaker 07

  Big Red here and

• 51:22Theo Von?

  Big Red, baby. Let's hear more, daddy.

• 51:27Speaker 07

  Um, I mean, I just wanna uh preface by saying I'm I'm not racist, but um.

• 51:38Theo Von?

  Alright, onward.

• 51:41Speaker 07

  Um, lately I've been hanging out with, you know, some brothers and I've I I've sneezed a couple times, but um.

• 51:49Theo Von?

  You sneezed, okay, you been sneezing.

• 51:51Speaker 07

  I I've noticed that I've been sneezing around outside and um

• 51:59Speaker 07

  and I just I they don't say bless you. And I don't know if it's like a me thing. I don't know if like you it's like I don't know if it's like hard to look tough, like saying bless you, like. Uh, I've been trying to say bless you in the mirror in a tough way and it's I gotta admit it's it's a really hard task to do like.

• 52:20Theo Von?

  Okay, I think I see what you're saying. You're saying a lot of brothers, they don't say bless you when you sneeze. Well, I mean, I think that's just a that's just life, bro. I mean, brothers been through a lot of shit historically, man.

• 52:33Theo Von?

  Brothers and female brothers too, the sisters, they been through some shit, man. Get a history book, dog. So they ain't worried if somebody can't handle a little pollen or something, somebody sneezed, that ain't they're worried somebody goes into prison. You know, that they that's when they drop some bless yous on them. They worried they can't get the pain out of the culture. That's when they that's some they'll they'll they'll yell a bless you. They save some of their bless yous for Sunday as well. But they it's it's white folk, we you know, we somebody sneeze, bless you, Ernie. Bless you, bless you, Nathan.

• 53:13Theo Von?

  That, that's cause, we, that's, you know, black folk, they, just cause somebody can't handle sitting near a tulip or something, or somebody get a little activated, their lungs flare up around a fern, that ain't, that's a little bit more white trauma than it is a black trauma, I think, you know? Some white dudes like, "Oh, them azaleas, I can't breathe." Like you the floral George Floyd or something, man, get your shit together, man. Get your, and don't bother a brother to say bless you because your white ass having trouble with some dandelion dander, okay? Get it together.

• 53:55Theo Von?

  Your soft ass, can't breathe for half a second, you want God to help you. Aw, come on, man. Come on, man, so, I think that's just, look, man, that's a cultural thing, and I think you gotta let that lie where it lies, baby, that's what I believe. Praise God, man. Thank you for the call, though. Thank you for letting me think out loud with you. Is pornography causing a problem in your life? Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone.

• 54:35Theo Von?

  Watching pornography has become so commonplace today, and oftentimes, men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression. Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity. Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member, and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography, and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that.

• 55:21Theo Von?

  Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life. Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www dot Valor Recovery Coaching dot com or email them at admin at Valor Recovery Coaching dot com. Thank you.

• 55:54Theo Von?

  You know, I do want to say though, it's that, you know, it is that time of year where we can try to do more for others. That's one of my things I was thinking about yesterday. I was like, how can I make next year?

• 56:04Theo Von?

  How can I do more? You know, and we all want to, right? We all want time. I hear that so many times from people like, hey, how can I be a part of, how can I do? You know? And so, yeah, I've been thinking about that a lot and I'm gonna, um,

• 56:18Theo Von?

  I want to figure that out, you know? Just ways to, yeah, we have, we all want to find ways to give back to help our, our neighbor. You know?

• 56:29Theo Von?

  And this is the time of year for that to be on our, on our hearts, I think. Or I don't know, I'm not trying to preach at you. This is the time of year where that's on my heart.

• 56:37Theo Von?

  You know, how can I?

• 56:40Theo Von?

  Yeah. How can I think about somebody else? Cause what a relief it is when you're trapped in yourself to have a moment where you're thinking about somebody else. You're like, oh, thank you, God. Let me think about somebody else, man.

• 56:55Theo Von?

  What else? Let's take a couple more calls here on the way out. Let me take this one right here.

• 57:03Theo Von?

  Hey, Theo. I love the show.

• 57:07Theo Von?

  I'm calling with an issue. I'm 20 years old.

• 57:12Speaker 07

  I've been drinking every single day since I've been seventeen.

• 57:16Speaker 07

  There's been times where I stopped drinking for a week. I always fall back into the same thing. And I hate myself for it.

• 57:24Theo Von?

  Hmm.

• 57:25Speaker 07

  Everything pulls me down. I'm just wondering if you have any advice for me? Thank you.

• 57:32Theo Von?

  Yeah, I noticed myself, man. Thanks for calling, bro. Uh, I noticed myself when I get, um, when I'm doing something I don't want to be doing. When I'm doing something I don't want to be doing, and then I've said to myself, hey, I don't want to do this anymore. And then I keep doing it. I can't help but do it. Right? That's addiction. You can't help it. You're doing it. Um, which isn't you. That's not you making that choice all the time. It is, it's addiction. It's a disease. Right? So the same as if somebody had cancer, you wouldn't say to them every day, oh, damn, you have cancer. You keep choosing to have cancer. No. They have cancer. It's the same with addiction. You are, you don't want to do this. You're doing it. Right?

• 58:16Theo Von?

  You can't stop that cycle. Um. And then here, this, this is what I would notice for myself. Then shame starts building up because now not only am I addicted, now I am. Uh. Now I am, um. Ashamed because I keep breaking my own promise to myself.

• 58:38Theo Von?

  Right? Now I'm losing my integrity. So now not only am I dealing with addiction, but I'm also dealing with, uh, with, with shame. And man, when those two dogs get together.

• 58:51Theo Von?

  Good luck getting a frisbee through the yard, brother. Them some growlers, daddy. Um. But that's the only, people ask me a lot, how, you know, about addiction stuff. The only answer I ever know that has helped me has been, uh, go into recovery. Go into Alcoholics Anonymous, starting there. Go into a meeting.

• 59:11Theo Von?

  Because the first thing they ask you in there is that um my life is your life unmanageable? That's the question. Is your life unmanageable? Nothing has to be about alcohol or any, is your life unmanageable? Because that's a way where you get to choose for yourself. Nobody's making a diagnosis of you being an alcoholic. You decide. But it's like, is life unmanageable? And that's a very fair question, anybody. And if the answer is yes, then they, there's more, then you take it from there and there, you know? But I would recommend go to 3AA meetings, some different ones.

• 59:55Theo Von?

  Listen for the similarities and don't listen for the differences. Because it's easy to be like, ah, this shit, nah, nah. That ain't, you hear one thing like that ain't for me, you know? So, yeah, man, I'm sorry that you're dealing with that. But that's really the only, I don't have a magic button or a magic solution, you know? And then once you're in there, you can maybe get some sponsorship or something. They can help you decide if you should get treatment or that sort of thing. Now, if you're drinking every day for that long, you may need treatment to detoxify yourself. But, uh, thinking of you, brother. And um, and thank you for calling, man. I appreciate that. Uh, what else?

• 1:00:39Theo Von?

  Here we go. Let's hear it.

• 1:00:41Speaker 03

  What up, Theo? Hi. Hey, I got a question for you. Uh, my name's Jocelyn and I have a son here. He's 10 years old with Down Syndrome. Just any advice that you would give to him personally would be much appreciated. And um, we think you're great. Keep doing what you're doing, bro.

• 1:01:01Theo Von?

  Thank you. Thank you, Jocelyn. That was very sweet of you to call. Happy Thanksgiving to you and to your child right there. And I'd say to your child, I'd say, hang in there, young king. Okay? You little freckled sparrow of the heavens, hang in there. Hold the line, baby boy.

• 1:01:23Theo Von?

  Cause young DS Lords like yourself are heroes and you are beloved. You are God's thank you card. There's not any of us in existence that doesn't see somebody with Down Syndrome

• 1:01:42Theo Von?

  and feel something, you know? You make a candle just light up inside of everybody. Y'all are the ones, y'all are the ones braving the genetic nether realm to see what's on the other side. Y'all are the Lewis and Clarks of DNA, okay? The Harriet Tubman of afflictions. That's y'all, young king. And every year, we're getting closer to winning this war. I'll say that out loud. We will battle with Down Syndrome until it's all the way down.

• 1:02:22Theo Von?

  We will not relent. So keep hugging your mom and keep being a bumblebee of hope for all of us.

• 1:02:34Theo Von?

  And keep smiling because when you smile, when people with Down Syndrome smile, we all smile somehow. Cause we all have that, just a...

• 1:02:49Theo Von?

  Not a DS, but a D-O-S-E of it inside of us. And I believe that, you know? And that's why we can relate. And I love you and I love your mom and I wish y'all a happy Thanksgiving.

• 1:03:05Theo Von?

  And keep teaching the rest of us how to love better, you know? Cause I was right there in it. I was right there in it, just in the grips.

• 1:03:15Theo Von?

  And I was able to just break my foot free as a child.

• 1:03:20Theo Von?

  And I love you guys, man. Baby, praise God, man.

• 1:03:25Theo Von?

  What else? Any other call that came in? Here's a young lady that called. And here we go, one more call.

• 1:03:39Speaker 03

  I'm struggling.

• 1:03:43Speaker 03

  It's just hard. Going back and forth trying to find a job with an addiction. It's really hard.

• 1:03:52Speaker 03

  I can't seem to put the alcohol down.

• 1:03:58Speaker 03

  And it's funny that is. I listen to your podcast because of how you talk about coke. And uh, I've been struggling with putting it down. And I just get to the point where I just.

• 1:04:18Speaker 03

  I get so deep, you can't get out of it. And I know what you know what I mean.

• 1:04:24Theo Von?

  Man, it just shit breaks my heart kinda, you know?

• 1:04:26Speaker 01

  It's tough.

• 1:04:33Theo Von?

  Yeah, just I don't know what it makes you feel. I mean, it just, I guess, yeah. I mean, it just, yeah, I don't know. It makes me sad.

• 1:04:44Theo Von?

  Yeah, I guess it makes me like, um. What does it make you feel like?

• 1:04:51Speaker 01

  Well, I think it's, I think it's uh, powerful that they feel like they could reach out to you to talk about it. With someone who can relate, you know what I'm saying?

• 1:04:59Theo Von?

  Yeah. Yeah, I think there's a part of it's like you wanna. You can just tell when somebody's hurting, you know? At least, uh, maybe let us call her. Is that crazy you think, Trevin?

• 1:05:11Speaker 01

  Do it. I think it would make her day.

• 1:05:13Theo Von?

  Let's just call her. Let's see. We can even ask her if we, I don't care if we put this on or not. We can just, let me see.

• 1:05:33Theo Von?

  Hello? Hey, what's up?

• 1:05:36Theo Von?

  Who is it? It's Theo. It's you.

• 1:05:40Theo Von?

  Theo Von, I got you. Did you call? I don't know if this is the right person. Did you call our? I just, I have like a voicemail thing. I just didn't know if you called it the other day. Is this really Theo Von? Yeah, yeah, it is. Who's this? Holy shit. You actually listen to it? Yeah, sometimes it takes me a while, dude. It frickin' takes me a while, but we just happened to, um, start list, just like, uh, we, we've been listening for the past couple of weeks to try and do like a, um, an episode to come out next week. And so, yeah, today I was listening to him and I just heard your message and it just like, uh, yeah, you know, I struggle with shit. So I just thought I would just say what's up or, you know? Dude, I just had a wreck like two days ago and- Oh, what happened?

• 1:06:25Theo Von?

  I don't know how I didn't die. I was not paying attention and I got, I like rear engine, but I was flying and I shouldn't have. Mm-hmm. And it totaled the fuck out of my car. I don't know how I died. I just, I just came out with a small concussion and nobody else was hurt. And did you have insurance? Yeah. It's getting taken care of, but it's just been a shitty week. I got cheated on too, so. Oh. That's the worst. I can't believe you actually listened to my voicemail. Yeah, well, it just shook me, you know? I mean, it just made me, you know, it seemed like you're having a, going through a tough time and I've been there for sure. Um. I'm going on nineteen hours. Of no drinking? Right now. Yeah.

• 1:07:09Theo Von?

  Let's go. That's awesome. Dude, nineteen hours is big. I know. It's a lot for me. Yeah, yeah, it is. I'm happy for you. That's awesome. What do you think, uh, so what, what time of day or what kind of happens that you start to, you, you feel like you start to fall apart a little bit or make you drink?

• 1:07:29Theo Von?

  Well, it was really the start of my job.

• 1:07:31Speaker 03

  I started a job last year and we ended up having to work like it was mandatory twenty seven days a week. And it's been like that the whole time I started and I finally, they fired me in October. That then that's when shit really started to fall apart. I started showing up, drinking on the job and stuff. It was just getting really rough. Trying to help.

• 1:07:53Theo Von?

  Yeah, so you you you just drinking to get by, huh?

• 1:07:57Speaker 03

  Yeah. I went through a couple of relationships. I tried to make relationships and just got shit on. It's just, it's been a rough year, really.

• 1:08:05Theo Von?

  Yeah, dang. And where do you got family over there or no?

• 1:08:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, I live with my mom and my dad.

• 1:08:13Theo Von?

  Oh, nice. You have any children?

• 1:08:15Speaker 03

  Oh, I'm twenty four. I'm still living a little bit of life if I'm trying to.

• 1:08:20Theo Von?

  Oh, well, look, I think you got some blessings right there. And so you don't have a, you don't have a responsibility outside of yourself. You gotta take care of. That's nice, you know?

• 1:08:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:08:28Theo Von?

  I mean, except for your folks, you know?

• 1:08:30Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:08:32Theo Von?

  Do you ever, um, go to AA meetings or anything?

• 1:08:37Speaker 03

  No, I have never thought about it. Uh, I got put on, uh, medication. A while back, but I got off of it and I think that kind of made it worse because I'm like cold turkey.

• 1:08:47Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, that can be tricky.

• 1:08:49Speaker 03

  Uh, but I felt like the medicine was just making me more depressed, but it could be from the drinking too, while drinking on it. So I've never had like talked to a therapist or anybody about it.

• 1:09:03Theo Von?

  What do you feel? I mean, do you feel like you drank too much? You just feel like you feel bad? I mean, or you, or do you just feel like maybe you just had a tough couple of days? No judgment either. I'm not judging you.

• 1:09:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, I I just.

• 1:09:16Speaker 03

  I've been through, I know there's people out there that go through worse things. But I have, was in a relationship for a few years before I moved back in with my parents and. It was abusive and I lost, I had a, I was pregnant. I lost my baby and I think that's where it all started.

• 1:09:38Speaker 03

  This is really hard.

• 1:09:40Theo Von?

  Yeah, I bet that's tough, huh? You probably just, I don't know, what did it? Did you start? Yeah, like, what did you start feeling, you think?

• 1:09:50Speaker 03

  I just felt like I couldn't do nothing and couldn't anymore. I think that's where it all. Started like to fall apart for me and I kept trying to like get back up and it just kept bringing him back down and then I just picked up alcohol and it's funny because I used to never want to drink, not even when I turned twenty one and.

• 1:10:09Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:11Speaker 03

  It's just a lot of baggage, I feel like.

• 1:10:14Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah. Oh, if I just can't feel, if I feel like I just can't do good anymore, that's horrible feeling.

• 1:10:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:10:22Theo Von?

  I'm sorry, I'm sorry you that you've been dealing with all that.

• 1:10:26Speaker 03

  I'm trying to get back up on my feet, get another job. I think that's not working and stuff like that is really you're just sitting at home thinking in your head all the time. I don't have one friend and I love her to death. She always tries to help me, but I'm kind of a hard headed and I don't listen to her.

• 1:10:44Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, we can't. Yeah, it's hard. Yeah. Don't try to help me.

• 1:10:53Theo Von?

  Well, dang, yeah, I wish there was some way that I could help out, you know, I wish there was something I could do to be supportive.

• 1:11:00Theo Von?

  Yeah, I mean, do they have therapists in your town? Do you think even going to somebody like that would help? I'm just trying to think of something that might help you get a better. You know, or do you need to get a new job? Do you think you could even work right now? What do you think's going on?

• 1:11:13Speaker 03

  I don't, I don't even, I don't know how to start. I don't know if I. I've always like been around people that tell me therapy doesn't work and you don't need to go to pay somebody to tell them about your problems because they don't care. Yeah, stuff like that. So I guess I kind of just stuck that in my head, but I didn't need to go talk to people about it, I guess.

• 1:11:33Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:34Speaker 03

  I kind of just hold it in until I explode.

• 1:11:37Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:40Theo Von?

  Well, yeah, I just don't know if that's good or not. I don't know if it's good for anything to hold anything in that long, you know?

• 1:11:45Speaker 03

  No, it's not, but I've always grew up where you don't talk about your emotions that much, so.

• 1:11:51Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, dude.

• 1:11:54Theo Von?

  Oh God, if I, if you felt something in my neighborhood, somebody'd call you a dang f**k, to be honest with you, you know?

• 1:12:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:12:01Theo Von?

  And no offense, I didn't say that, I think it's a

• 1:12:03Speaker 03

  No, that is exactly how it is down here.

• 1:12:06Theo Von?

  But damn, yeah, I feel you there. Um, well, how about this, maybe I'll just, is it, I'll check back in with you in like a week or something to see how things are going.

• 1:12:18Speaker 03

  Okay, that, it really helped you calling, you actually heard me, like, it just felt, made me feel better.

• 1:12:25Theo Von?

  Yeah, well, I, I know what that's, yeah, I can relate to that, man, for sure. Yeah, just

• 1:12:31Speaker 03

  Sometimes you just need somebody to listen.

• 1:12:33Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:39Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's true, man, I feel that, I feel that.

• 1:12:47Theo Von?

  Yeah, I feel that, I definitely feel that.

• 1:12:49Speaker 03

  Yeah. It feels good to get it out, but, you know, some people just don't wanna hear about your problems. They're always like, well, I'm dealing with this, I'm dealing with that, everybody's dealing with shit, mm.

• 1:13:02Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:02Speaker 03

  But sometimes you just need somebody to hear you out, and not make you feel crazy for it.

• 1:13:08Theo Von?

  Yeah, and you're right, sometimes we just want somebody to listen. You know, we just want something to be, you know, we just want a place to put something. There's obviously different things you could go do to try to get help for yourself, you know, or if you wanted to, you have insurance or no?

• 1:13:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, I do.

• 1:13:24Theo Von?

  Okay, cool, so you could, if you wanted to try therapy, then you could try it at least, you know, I know it takes time to like try and figure that out, but that is a thing, and then, um, yeah, but yeah, how about this, I'll just, yeah, I just wanna just, I'll check back in like in a week or something and just see how you're doing, is that okay if I check back in?

• 1:13:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's fine.

• 1:13:43Theo Von?

  Okay, cool. Um, all right, well, have a good time over there, what y'all gonna do for Thanksgiving?

• 1:13:51Speaker 03

  Well.

• 1:13:53Theo Von?

  What are your parents doing?

• 1:13:56Speaker 03

  They're cooking some food. I'm with family. I'm not on good terms with my brother right now, so it's gonna be kinda awkward.

• 1:14:04Theo Von?

  Damn, I wish I could figure that out before he gets over there.

• 1:14:08Speaker 03

  Everybody tells me to apologize. I need to stop holding the grudge. I know I do. I'm working on it.

• 1:14:14Theo Von?

  Yeah, I feel you. Sometimes that stuff's hard, you know? It's hard. Um, maybe, uh, I don't, I don't know. I I feel you. I just struggle with that. I got the same issues with some of my family. It's tough, you know? It's, family's tough. Um. But yeah, if I can't swallow my pride for my fam- you know, at least do it for myself, for others, you know? Cause it don't have to be about me on Thanksgiving. That's what I started thinking the other day.

• 1:14:41Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:14:42Theo Von?

  You know, I don't, I, I don't deserve to ruin other people's day just because I have feelings a certain way, you know? I should be able to figure that out. I'm not telling you that. I'm just saying that to me, really.

• 1:14:54Speaker 03

  Gotta be humble and grateful.

• 1:14:56Theo Von?

  Well, I just, I should be able to approach somebody in my family at the end of the day, say it were the last minute on earth.

• 1:15:04Theo Von?

  What do I, what do I want that family member to think? I want them to think, oh, I was holding something against them, you know, that I couldn't figure, you know, like, no, I would want my family member to think that I love them, you know, so I gotta figure that out, even if it's for a short-term basis, you know, because I, I don't know. I just don't want, yeah, I don't wanna be

• 1:15:25Theo Von?

  always a part of the problem, you know?

• 1:15:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:15:29Theo Von?

  But, alright, well, I gotta finish up, cause I'm about to go watch some football.

• 1:15:35Theo Von?

  Alright, what's your first name?

• 1:15:39Theo Von?

  Well, I appreciate you calling, and I just hope you hang in there, and, uh, yeah, just don't feel alone, you know, because that's, that isn't true.

• 1:15:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, I know I have family that supports me.

• 1:15:51Theo Von?

  Yeah, and you just have people that are like you. I think sometimes you just have to go find, you have to, it's hard sometimes, we gotta, we gotta, we gotta find them, you know?

• 1:16:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:16:01Theo Von?

  So, but anyway, I hope I'm not try- I don't sound like I'm trying to preach at you, do I?

• 1:16:06Speaker 03

  No, no, I needed this, actually. I needed to talk to somebody about it.

• 1:16:12Theo Von?

  Yeah. Anything else you're feeling?

• 1:16:16Speaker 03

  No, I'm just gonna drink a bunch of water and keep going.

• 1:16:22Theo Von?

  There you go. Stay hydrated, baby. That's what you can do. All right, Emily. Happy Thanksgiving.

• 1:16:27Speaker 03

  All right. Happy Thanksgiving. You have a good one.

• 1:16:30Theo Von?

  Okay, you too. Take care.

• 1:16:35Theo Von?

  Wow, sweet girl.

• 1:16:39Theo Von?

  Yeah, man, it just, that's wild. It's so fun to do this. The same things I'm dealing. I got some family. It's just like, it's tough. But then what do I want to do? I want to go, I want to bring all this shit or tell my family members like, well, I don't want to be there if they're there. Then I'm just making a storm.

• 1:16:56Theo Von?

  And the truth is, there's a part of me inside of me that wants to be around my family. It wants everything to be okay, you know? But there's another part of me that wants to have things my way.

• 1:17:11Theo Von?

  That's really what it is for me. Even if the other person wronged me or I don't like their energy or whatever, I can't figure this shit out for two hours. You know? And then what's my part in it? I'm a saint? No. Sometimes I'm a Saint Bernard with a couple of face tattoos, baby. I'm fucking Jelly Wolf, you feel me? So, don't make me pop the trunk.

• 1:17:38Theo Von?

  Oh, this is my brother. Let me see if I can get a couple, him to say a couple of things he's thankful for.

• 1:17:46Theo Von?

  Big Z.

• 1:17:48Speaker 07

  What's up, bro?

• 1:17:49Theo Von?

  Not much. I'm recording my podcast right now, brother. How are you?

• 1:17:53Speaker 07

  Good, good. Just checking in on you, bro, and seeing, checking in on you after the other day.

• 1:17:59Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, I appreciate it, man. Yeah, I was just talking to some girl. She like called her hotline. She'd been having a tough time.

• 1:18:07Speaker 07

  Oh, really?

• 1:18:07Theo Von?

  Yeah, she just, yeah, she was having a tough time. So I just gave her, I just called over there and was talking to her for a little while.

• 1:18:14Speaker 07

  Oh, from the show?

• 1:18:16Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:17Speaker 07

  Oh, nice. Yeah, so you got the, you been doing the hotline more now? Someone said that to me the other day.

• 1:18:23Theo Von?

  I'm trying to. I just, sometimes it's hard for me to feel comfort. It's like, I don't like to do it when I don't, or do solo. You know, sometimes I do my podcast just by myself.

• 1:18:32Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:18:33Theo Von?

  Yeah, I don't like to do it if the, um, if I don't feel comfort, you know, like if I feel agitated or something, or I'm stressed out.

• 1:18:43Speaker 07

  That's fine. That makes sense to me.

• 1:18:46Theo Von?

  Yeah, cuz it just feels like I can't be. I don't feel like my, you know, I just feel like um.

• 1:18:53Theo Von?

  Like I'm just going through the motions or whatever, you know.

• 1:18:56Speaker 07

  Yeah, you kind of caught up in other stuff.

• 1:18:58Theo Von?

  But it was just, yeah, but some girl's called. She just been struggling.

• 1:19:03Speaker 07

  Oh, nice. That's pretty que- that's pretty crazy. Kind of did a little twelve step work on your podcast.

• 1:19:09Theo Von?

  Yeah, just to listen to her. She is, she was talking about. I don't know. She reminded me of just, it's funny, we could have both had some of the same things, which was like. Being around family during the holiday, just stuff like that too. We ended up talking about.

• 1:19:22Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah. I need to call that hotline now. I just forget about that. You guys can call in sometime?

• 1:19:27Theo Von?

  Yeah, dude. Well, actually you can help us right now. We're finishing that. If you have a couple of things you're thankful for, we're just gonna think of a couple of them on the way out. Out of the episode, if you got a couple.

• 1:19:37Speaker 07

  Oh, man, what am I thankful for? Oh, that's such a big question.

• 1:19:43Theo Von?

  I know it is.

• 1:19:45Speaker 07

  I guess I, I mean, I'm definitely thankful for, you know, my family.

• 1:19:51Speaker 07

  You know, you and everyone else in our family for sure. I'm really thankful for my friends and the friendships that I've been. Developing, um.

• 1:20:05Speaker 07

  I mean, I'm thankful for, um. Potential, you know, just like being able to. Just to get up in the morning and, you know, go for another day. I'm thankful for. Really thankful for the, that I get to be a parent, you know, um.

• 1:20:25Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, that's a good one.

• 1:20:28Speaker 07

  Yeah, I love parenting. I love raising my children, um.

• 1:20:37Speaker 07

  What to say here? Yeah, I used to have this, uh. This hypothetical, like, it's a little bit derogatory, but I can tell you if you want.

• 1:20:44Theo Von?

  Yeah, alright.

• 1:20:46Speaker 07

  Alright, so if you're on an island and you can't, you can't masturbate. Right? You can't. That's the example. You have no arms. You can't do it.

• 1:20:57Theo Von?

  Okay, you have legs though?

• 1:21:01Speaker 07

  Well, you, yeah, but if you can use them to masturbate, then no, because you can't masturbate in this example.

• 1:21:05Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 1:21:05Speaker 07

  So you have one leg. There's no way you can do it. There's no way you can do it with one leg. You have one leg and no arms.

• 1:21:10Theo Von?

  Oh, got me.

• 1:21:12Speaker 07

  And you're just laying naked. You're laying naked on the beach on this deserted island, right?

• 1:21:16Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 1:21:16Speaker 07

  And, but you have a strong libido.

• 1:21:19Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 1:21:20Speaker 07

  And you're a heterosexual male, like you, like you, I mean, like you probably are. I don't know for certain, but you probably are heterosexual male. So you're heterosexual male.

• 1:21:27Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:28Speaker 07

  And you have a strong libido. You can't, and then all of a sudden, there's another man on the island.

• 1:21:33Theo Von?

  Oh.

• 1:21:35Speaker 07

  So here's the question.

• 1:21:36Theo Von?

  Hmm.

• 1:21:36Speaker 07

  Do you eventually have sex with this man?

• 1:21:40Theo Von?

  No, I don't think you do.

• 1:21:43Speaker 07

  Now, for me, it's a hell yeah.

• 1:21:45Theo Von?

  God.

• 1:21:46Speaker 07

  Hell, yeah. I mean.

• 1:21:48Theo Von?

  Really?

• 1:21:48Speaker 07

  I don't mean like, well, yeah, think about it, which if you can't, if you can't masturbate, you can't.

• 1:21:53Theo Von?

  But y'all date for a long time first, or is there any, or how does it even?

• 1:21:57Speaker 07

  No, one day you're out there just laying on the beach because you can't walk. You only have one leg.

• 1:22:02Theo Von?

  You can get up and hop over there.

• 1:22:04Speaker 07

  Well, you could, you could knee over. You could knee over. You could hobble over. And then kinda from the distance, here comes this man walking and he's got two legs.

• 1:22:14Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah. Big spender, huh?

• 1:22:17Speaker 07

  Big spender. He's got a shirt. He's got a shirt, but you can see his chest and you guys just strike it up, you know?

• 1:22:23Theo Von?

  What are you talking about, dude?

• 1:22:25Speaker 07

  Yeah. Just listen, dude. It's the example. You make a little bonfire together. You roast weenies. You have a little weenie roast.

• 1:22:31Theo Von?

  Wait, hold on. How could you can't even walk, but suddenly you're a damn weeblo scout, dude?

• 1:22:39Speaker 07

  No, bro. Look, he carries you over to the fire and lays you down.

• 1:22:43Theo Von?

  Oh, God.

• 1:22:45Speaker 07

  Breasts, breasts up, breasts up. Lays you down. And then, so I'm just saying, eventually. Eventually, you'd have sex even though you're not, even though you're a heterosexual male.

• 1:22:57Theo Von?

  All right. All right, man. I'm gonna give you a buzz back, all right?

• 1:23:01Speaker 07

  That's what I'm thankful for. All right, bro. I love you.

• 1:23:03Theo Von?

  All right. Love you too, man. Wow.

• 1:23:11Theo Von?

  It's got me thinking too, man. You're like, you'd have to go on dates with the guy. You know what I'm saying? You're like, and you'd have to know people aren't coming to get you.

• 1:23:22Theo Von?

  You can't just, you know what I'm saying, Trevin?

• 1:23:26Speaker 01

  You'd be having sex with the guy and then you hear a helicopter over top.

• 1:23:30Theo Von?

  Yeah, dude, totally. Yeah, you can't be, if you just are stuck on an island for two days and you hook up with a dude, then you're just a gay guy.

• 1:23:40Theo Von?

  Which is fine, but don't be like, oh, the island or whatever. Wow. Just an island boy. Dang, bro. And that's why our family has trouble during the holidays. I'll tell you that, man. That is why they do. Um, blessings to everybody out there, man. Thank you guys for being a part of my life. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life. Um, thank you for, just this year, it's been crazy, man. The past couple of weeks were really crazy, like, uh, yeah, I kinda was like losing my mind. I went on Joe Rogan's show and I was just having a tough time on there. I just was like, I think I got real scared, like after like the election and, uh,

• 1:24:23Theo Von?

  people making podcast, like, they're like podcasts swayed the election and I don't believe any of that. I believe people do what they want to do, you know, and, and then they make out to be this big right wing fat, people emailing me about fascism or whatever. And, uh, just a lot, just like, um, yeah, just because I voted for my buddy. Bobby Kennedy's my friend.

• 1:24:50Theo Von?

  That is my friend. I know, but I, I, in fact, uh, he's, he's a good, he's a, just a, he's somebody I trust. He's my friend, right? I'll vote for my friend. You think my friend is gonna run for fricking president of the United States and I'm not gonna vote for him, dude? Or for, uh, you know, Minister of Health or whatever? Or whatever it is called. It's called, um, Deadpool seven or whatever he's called now, whatever. You know, uh, the CBS warlord, or I'm not even sure what they're calling him now. Um, but yeah, I'm gonna vote for my friend and I don't really care what anybody thinks about that.

• 1:25:33Theo Von?

  I don't think, um, and I wouldn't think it's weird if you vote for your friend. I don't give a fuck who anybody votes for, but yeah. So, but I don't know. Yeah. I think just a lot of stuff like kind of freaked me out in the past couple of weeks and I was just been feeling overwhelmed and, um, and yeah, and then we all go through shit and then the, the year's going fast and whatever. I'm not, I'm not making a pity party.

• 1:25:58Theo Von?

  I'm just happy to take a breath, man.

• 1:26:01Theo Von?

  I'm just happy to take a breath, happy to be alive. And maybe I do feel like I have to explain myself. I don't know. I may, you know, I don't, I don't know. I'm just, I don't know what I'm doing. Okay? So you, you won't come to my house or office. I don't even have an office, but you won't come to whatever and see like a board, like a, you know, chalkboard or whatever, with arrows on it or whatever, or like, you know, it says, you know, secrets or, you know, just like, so anyway, I don't really know what I'm talking about. Who cares, man? I've talked enough. I've wasted enough of your time today. As always, the hotline is nine eight five six six four nine five zero three.

• 1:26:45Theo Von?

  And yeah, the holidays, man, you gotta think they're coming up. Let me try this one.

• 1:26:53Theo Von?

  Nah, that's Jesus Christ. I'm gonna beat somebody's ass outside of a Bed Bath & Beyond if I have to hear that. Let's try this.

• 1:27:11Theo Von?

  Okay. It's close. It's a bit much.

• 1:27:16Theo Von?

  That's my brother. I can't listen to that anymore. He's trying to give me go on a cruise, I bet. Uh.

• 1:27:24Theo Von?

  There we go.

• 1:27:33Theo Von?

  A little too slow.

• 1:27:38Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah. That's taking a bath by yourself, dude. That's when it gets really crazy. If you're young and you jerk off to that dude, you obviously wears, wear like a nice jacket when you do it, you know?

• 1:28:16Theo Von?

  Just remind everybody, be good to yourselves, man. Be good to others. Do, let's do, we'll just keep doing what we can do. I'm excited about the end of the year we have coming up. We will take a week off at some point for no episode. And, uh, and yeah, that's what's, that's all that's going on. And, um, happy Thanksgiving to you, Trevin.

• 1:28:37Speaker 01

  You too, brother.

• 1:28:38Theo Von?

  Yeah, thank you for being here. Riley Mau, um, Ben Becker, um, all of the producers that have helped, uh, Zach Powers, Colin Reiner, Nick Davis, uh, Cameron George, um, we got a whole gaggle of guys and, uh, and people who have over the years. Uh, happy Thanksgiving to you guys and, um, thank you guys for, uh, being a part of my life and, and, um, and the support and you guys be good to yourselves, baby. Gang.