Freud Would’ve Loved This

SUBSCRIBE TO THE BNC CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/45Pspyl Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://bit.ly/3OZxwpr NEW MERCH: https://shoptmgstudios.com Happy Thanksgiving from Brooke and Connor! This week, the two are dissecting your dreams and figuring out what they really mean. Plus, they talk about their most awkward encounters with the teachers at their school. Join our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5356639204457124/ Get the coverage you need. Check out https://StateFarm.com or try their app because Like a Good Neighbor, State Farm is there. Exclusive $45-off Carver Mat at https://AuraFrames.com. Use code BANDC at checkout to save! Shop the SKIMS Holiday Shop at https://SKIMS.com and after you place your order, select Brooke & Connor under "podcast" in the survey. Grab a refreshing Twisted Tea today and Keep it Twisted. Find your nearest locations at https://www.twistedtea.com/locations. B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Hosted by Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, Created by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, and Produced by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood. 0:00 The New AI Norm 0:57 Intro 1:17 Clone FOMO 4:07 Make Game Show Viral 5:30 Connor's Gastro Update 10:55 State Farm 12:26 Bracelet Haul 17:20 Nature vs Nurture 19:40 Insane Rage 22:55 Aura Frames 24:42 Not Listening To Bullys 28:16 Analyzing Brooke's New Dream 36:19 Skims 38:37 What Does It All Mean? 42:00 The Dream Spectrum 43:50 Wild Teacher Stories 49:00 Robotic Penis Dream 50:09 Attending Your Own Funeral 52:35 Twisted Tea 54:20 Killer Grandma Dream 56:21 Getting Chased Dream 57:23 Freudian Dream 59:43 Connor Is A Minion Influencer 1:01:30 More Freud Content 1:03:22 Performing On Stage Dreams 1:06:00 Rapping Down 1:06:42 Is This Real? 1:09:14 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

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• 0:30Speaker 01

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• 0:54Speaker 01

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• 0:59Brooke Averick?

  You could also get two ancestry service kits for only $99 at 23andMe. You haven't done one of those yet?

• 1:07Connor Wood?

  23andMe?

• 1:08Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:09Connor Wood?

  No, because my parents convinced me that that's selling your DNA to the government?

• 1:13Connor Wood?

  Which, like...

• 1:15Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 1:16Connor Wood?

  Like, do they not already have it?

• 1:17Brooke Averick?

  Surely, they have it.

• 1:18Connor Wood?

  We're gonna be the generation of like, "Oh, okay, well, this is the new norm, because we totally all did 23andMe." But like, if everybody sold their DNA to the government, like, I don't want to not have done that, you know?

• 1:31Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:31Connor Wood?

  Because what, everybody's gonna have a clone? Everyone's gonna have a clone, except me?

• 1:35Brooke Averick?

  I think I have new relatives, too. Oh my god, get this.

• 1:39Connor Wood?

  Could you, really quick, could you imagine?

• 1:41Brooke Averick?

  I have seven new DNA relatives.

• 1:42Connor Wood?

  Yeah, because it's all your clones from selling your DNA to the government.

• 1:47Connor Wood?

  Can you imagine? Everybody... Yeah, it's all your clones. They have to add that to your family tree. Can you imagine? I'll just start over from the beginning of this.

• 2:17Connor Wood?

  Could you imagine everybody had done 23 and Me, or like from one way or another had sold their government, or sold their DNA to the government? Government had gotten access to their DNA? In like 10 years, everybody has a clone, but like you that you're being really smart by not like participating in any of the DNA sales of your own DNA?

• 2:34Brooke Averick?

  You'd just be so left out without your clone.

• 2:36Connor Wood?

  Like everyone's going to the movies or the park with their clone? And like I'm sitting at home with my finger in my ass?

• 2:40Brooke Averick?

  But it could also be like a doodlebob situation.

• 2:42Connor Wood?

  Like my clone could have its finger in my ass.

• 2:43Brooke Averick?

  It could be a doodlebob situation, like evil.

• 2:45Connor Wood?

  Yeah, everyone's really worried about the clones or like the robots really killing us and stuff? And it's like valid, but like, why does it always have to be fear mongering? What if our clones really were just like us with like good intentions too? And what if they're scared of us? What if our clones are scared of us?

• 3:02Brooke Averick?

  I would be fine with a clone as long as it looked exactly like me. But if it's an inch prettier, it will have to be put down.

• 3:09Connor Wood?

  Death to clones.

• 3:10Brooke Averick?

  I've always like, my biggest nightmare has been having a sister closer to my age.

• 3:15Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 3:16Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, thank, thank God that my sister is eight years younger than me.

• 3:20Connor Wood?

  I would love to have a twin.

• 3:22Brooke Averick?

  I want a twin brother, but honestly, like Noah's less than two years younger than me. Once we got older, it was kind of like twins.

• 3:30Connor Wood?

  Yeah, two years is pretty specific. Your mom must have been pregnant like right off the bat after getting you out.

• 3:37Brooke Averick?

  Honestly, almost.

• 3:38Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 3:38Brooke Averick?

  Like, like not even a year after, almost a little over a year.

• 3:42Connor Wood?

  Like, that's like me going, getting upgraded again to the middle seat at Delta. Like you forget how horrible it was and then you do it again.

• 3:48Brooke Averick?

  I don't know, I don't get.

• 3:49Connor Wood?

  What are you doing over there?

• 3:50Brooke Averick?

  I'm trying, I'm resetting my password for 23 and Me. Obviously I have to do that right now.

• 3:54Connor Wood?

  Do you think maybe?

• 3:55Brooke Averick?

  Obviously I have to do that. No, obviously I can't. Obviously, we said it right now.

• 4:01Connor Wood?

  I'll continue talking about how I could see if I had a clone and it looked exactly like me, I'd be like, I'd be able to see finally, like, here's all the things wrong with your body. Now we can hone in on them.

• 4:13Brooke Averick?

  Hone in.

• 4:13Connor Wood?

  I feel like it's because I've only seen myself and I get, I don't know how to perceive myself and the way I look and the way I act because it's just from people telling me and getting DMs, like, you look like this person or this thing.

• 4:26Brooke Averick?

  It's so scary. You'll never be able to see yourself through another person's eyes.

• 4:30Connor Wood?

  And then I see pictures of myself and it's like,

• 4:31Brooke Averick?

  Ew.

• 4:32Connor Wood?

  Fugo, fugo, death, fugo jail, you know, but it's a lot of times people are like, what are you talking about? That's a good photo. You should post that. But hindsight's 50/50. Even foresight's 50/50. I don't have good foresight either.

• 4:44Brooke Averick?

  Yes, you do. You have 20/20.

• 4:45Connor Wood?

  No, they took my foresight during the circumcision.

• 4:48Brooke Averick?

  Connor.

• 4:50Connor Wood?

  That's funny, right? Like, kind of? Maybe that's, maybe there's something there.

• 4:53Brooke Averick?

  I don't even get it. Oh, foreskin.

• 4:56Connor Wood?

  Yeah. Ding ding ding, foreskin. Open up the schools.

• 5:00Brooke Averick?

  Yup.

• 5:01Connor Wood?

  Um, well, our YouTube video did come out now last week. This is the day that it came out, just so you know.

• 5:07Brooke Averick?

  Um, yeah, we actually recorded the episode that you saw last week.

• 5:12Connor Wood?

  Yesterday.

• 5:12Brooke Averick?

  Yesterday. So this is, this is yesterday for, uh, this is tomorrow.

• 5:18Connor Wood?

  This is tomorrow for us. It's today for us. Like, what are we talking about? Today is today.

• 5:26Brooke Averick?

  But it's also last week.

• 5:28Connor Wood?

  Now it's last week. How's the video doing? Can we just look?

• 5:32Brooke Averick?

  I think it just, it just hit the charts.

• 5:34Connor Wood?

  Two hours ago.

• 5:37Connor Wood?

  Well, anyways, it is out and it was really fun.

• 5:41Brooke Averick?

  8.8, would you believe it?

• 5:43Connor Wood?

  No, I wouldn't believe it unless you, unless I saw it. But we would love for you to hop over. I mean, now, like, talk about, talk about hindsight. Now we'll be looking back, no, a week from now when we're listening to this episode and it, we will be,

• 5:55Brooke Averick?

  And it'll have like 6.8 mil.

• 5:57Connor Wood?

  We'll be billionaires.

• 5:58Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, and we'll have 100 subscrib- 100K subscribers.

• 6:02Connor Wood?

  We'll probably have 250K subscribers.

• 6:04Brooke Averick?

  Holy.

• 6:06Connor Wood?

  Yeah, and I'll be a man with a black.

• 6:09Brooke Averick?

  A plaque?

• 6:10Connor Wood?

  A plaque. What?

• 6:12Brooke Averick?

  What?

• 6:13Connor Wood?

  A plaque. A plaque is what I said.

• 6:16Brooke Averick?

  Boyfriend would be.

• 6:18Connor Wood?

  Yeah, we're gonna have 250,000, so we're just gonna have to respect it.

• 6:21Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, you could say that again.

• 6:24Connor Wood?

  So, thank you guys for watching.

• 6:27Connor Wood?

  It's this week now. I already have updates from last week, even though it happened.

• 6:32Brooke Averick?

  It's only tomorrow.

• 6:33Connor Wood?

  I know, but it happened yesterday, but I have updates.

• 6:35Brooke Averick?

  What happened yesterday?

• 6:36Connor Wood?

  I had a gastroenterologist appointment.

• 6:37Brooke Averick?

  Oh, my god, what happened?

• 6:39Connor Wood?

  Well, she was able to tell me, "What the hell do you think I could do over the phone for you?"

• 6:43Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, what's the point of having a telehealth gastro?

• 6:48Connor Wood?

  She was just like, "I wanna, I wanna make sure I understand. You went in person? And now you're on a video call? You understand how that's moving backwards, right?" And I said, "Yes, but you're a specialist." She goes, "No, I can refer you to a specialist." I said, "I'm gonna kill myself."

• 7:05Brooke Averick?

  What? What are you doing?

• 7:08Connor Wood?

  It's impossible to say. It's impossible to say, "No one can help me. I have to figure this out on my own."

• 7:15Brooke Averick?

  But you can't.

• 7:16Connor Wood?

  Why can't I do this?

• 7:17Brooke Averick?

  I don't know. You need to hire a life manager.

• 7:22Connor Wood?

  I know. I think I need to hire an assistant who's, who's older and smarter than me, but like, that sounds so belittling.

• 7:27Brooke Averick?

  Could be younger, too.

• 7:29Connor Wood?

  Just younger and smarter than me.

• 7:30Brooke Averick?

  You need to hire Eileen.

• 7:32Connor Wood?

  Eileen, Eileen.

• 7:34Brooke Averick?

  Do you know who that is?

• 7:35Connor Wood?

  Eileen, Eileen.

• 7:36Brooke Averick?

  Do you know who Eileen is?

• 7:37Connor Wood?

  No.

• 7:37Brooke Averick?

  From our, from our video, "Are You Smarter Than a Good Breaker?"

• 7:40Connor Wood?

  Yeah, she seemed-

• 7:41Brooke Averick?

  She's the smartest girl I know.

• 7:42Connor Wood?

  She seemed really capable. She's in our YouTube video, if you haven't seen it.

• 7:44Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I mean, she could probably diagnose you herself.

• 7:48Connor Wood?

  I know, except that elbow of hers was really going crazy.

• 7:52Brooke Averick?

  What?

• 7:53Connor Wood?

  It popped just completely out.

• 7:54Brooke Averick?

  She popped out.

• 7:55Connor Wood?

  She threw me for a damn loop.

• 8:00Connor Wood?

  So, yeah, so I'm, I'm, I'm definitely at square one. That's not 23andMe. Are you online shopping?

• 8:06Brooke Averick?

  No, I'm on 23andMe.

• 8:08Connor Wood?

  That's a picture of a book.

• 8:09Brooke Averick?

  Browse your 23andMe results. Now you can view your answers to your reports in a beautiful hardcover book. See preview. Do not, do not mind if I do. Oh, it's gorgeous.

• 8:20Brooke Averick?

  Do you have any questions about my DNA?

• 8:23Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I'll just tell you guys all really quick, just so everyone can be in the loop with what's going on with my stomach.

• 8:29Brooke Averick?

  I hope you weren't diagnosed.

• 8:31Connor Wood?

  She hasn't sent me a testing kit.

• 8:33Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 8:35Connor Wood?

  What do you guys think I'm testing? Just out of your, if you had to guess?

• 8:38Brooke Averick?

  Crohn's?

• 8:39Connor Wood?

  No. I don't know what I'm testing for, but just like, I have to send in some samples.

• 8:44Brooke Averick?

  When I used to have panic attacks in front of people.

• 8:47Connor Wood?

  You can't send a sample of your panic attack?

• 8:50Brooke Averick?

  No, listen to me. When I used to have panic attacks in front of people and like have to run off and be sick, I would just say, "I'm sorry, I'm coming down with Crohn's." Because I thought that was better.

• 9:01Connor Wood?

  I have Crohn's. I'm not having a panic attack. I'm praying I don't have Crohn's.

• 9:07Brooke Averick?

  I don't think you have Crohn's.

• 9:08Connor Wood?

  I would know if I had Crohn's. You need to either buy the 23andMe book or wrap it up over there.

• 9:15Brooke Averick?

  I'll wrap it up, babe. I was just curious if my DNA had changed, and it did.

• 9:21Connor Wood?

  Your DNA didn't change?

• 9:22Brooke Averick?

  Yes, it did. My report changed. Now I'm only 99 point, oh my god, this has completely blown the case wide open. I'm 100% Brooke.

• 9:33Connor Wood?

  What?

• 9:33Brooke Averick?

  Within that, when you break that down, 99 point, I'm only 99.4.

• 9:38Connor Wood?

  Are you a little bit of Lexus?

• 9:39Brooke Averick?

  No, I'm only 99.4 Ashkenazi Jew, and that was not the case. It used to be 99.98.

• 9:44Connor Wood?

  You're getting less Ashkenazi?

• 9:47Brooke Averick?

  I'm getting, I got, now I'm 99.4 Ashkenazi Jew, West Central Ukrainian, and .4 Eastern European, and .1 broadly European.

• 10:01Connor Wood?

  Super much, like Max.

• 10:05Brooke Averick?

  So.

• 10:06Connor Wood?

  I, I don't know what any of that means, so besides the Jewish part.

• 10:10Brooke Averick?

  I think I'm just from the Ukraine, maybe.

• 10:12Connor Wood?

  You're from Ukraine?

• 10:13Brooke Averick?

  I don't, well, it said a little bit. Who the hell knows?

• 10:17Connor Wood?

  That's great. Ukrainian fans, make some noise for your.

• 10:20Brooke Averick?

  Ayyyy.

• 10:24Connor Wood?

  Okay, well, we'll move right along there.

• 10:26Brooke Averick?

  Wait, I want to do a haul.

• 10:28Connor Wood?

  Oh, yeah. I feel like, yeah, go ahead.

• 10:31Brooke Averick?

  Do you know what you're testing for in your poop?

• 10:33Connor Wood?

  Brooke.

• 10:38Brooke Averick?

  Sorry, I had gotten distracted by my Ukrainian roots.

• 10:40Connor Wood?

  I know, that's, I mean, that's, you can show those off and be proud of where you came from and your, and your blood.

• 10:45Brooke Averick?

  Okay, so you don't know what specifically they're running tests on? But you have to collect the sample?

• 10:52Connor Wood?

  Don't know how that's gonna-

• 10:53Brooke Averick?

  And then do you bring it in yourself?

• 10:55Connor Wood?

  I mail it. Isn't that crazy? Like, I hope my driver doesn't, like, drop it.

• 11:00Brooke Averick?

  I have to do that for Jonathan.

• 11:02Connor Wood?

  I did it for Max.

• 11:03Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I've done it for myself before. So much worse.

• 11:07Connor Wood?

  I'm not gonna ask like how you collected the sample. I'm just gonna have to figure it out. Just like everything else in my life, I have to figure it out.

• 11:15Brooke Averick?

  They give you a spoon?

• 11:19Connor Wood?

  Oh.

• 11:19Brooke Averick?

  Like a little spatula?

• 11:20Connor Wood?

  Okay. Let's, I'm gonna do that and not, I'm not gonna share the rest. I'll just share the update.

• 11:27Brooke Averick?

  The thing is, I know you're gonna share it.

• 11:29Connor Wood?

  I'm not gonna share how, like, my, my field research. Like, I'm not gonna share my, my research from the field.

• 11:34Brooke Averick?

  Just vlog it.

• 11:36Connor Wood?

  My first-

• 11:37Brooke Averick?

  Not a lot of people are doing it like that.

• 11:38Connor Wood?

  Me, me making it back to you. Guys, I have made my journey back to YouTube.

• 11:42Brooke Averick?

  Stool sample vlog.

• 11:45Brooke Averick?

  No one is doing it like that.

• 11:47Connor Wood?

  My stool sample vlog is what I'm gonna call it.

• 11:50Brooke Averick?

  That's what I just said.

• 11:51Connor Wood?

  That's what, I know, I'm agreeing with you. I started laughing really hard while you were talking.

• 11:55Brooke Averick?

  Okay, this is a haul of the bracelets that you've gotten on tour.

• 12:01Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 12:01Brooke Averick?

  Let's see what they say. A.

• 12:04Connor Wood?

  A. Another quick reminder, if you're in Dublin, you should buy tickets to the show, because I think that this will come out and I do the show tomorrow.

• 12:11Brooke Averick?

  This one says, P.

• 12:13Connor Wood?

  P.

• 12:14Brooke Averick?

  Okay, I'm also gonna challenge you to try to remember where everything came from. Do you remember where P came from?

• 12:19Connor Wood?

  Yeah, P was when I started laughing when I was talking about what I was doing in the bathroom. But like, I would love if this didn't become a bathroom episode.

• 12:28Connor Wood?

  We have so much to cover today. We have to get rid of Puh. Thank you for forgiving me that.

• 12:33Brooke Averick?

  Uh, this one says, "Fibula."

• 12:36Connor Wood?

  Oh, that came from...

• 12:37Brooke Averick?

  That one, I... I get it.

• 12:39Connor Wood?

  That's a tale as old as time.

• 12:41Brooke Averick?

  Okay, this one?

• 12:43Connor Wood?

  That's a gorgeous...

• 12:43Brooke Averick?

  Oh, I like this one. This is a gorgeous, uh, piece. It's like an onyx tone. And it says, "D-O-O-D." How would you pronounce?

• 12:50Connor Wood?

  Dude.

• 12:51Brooke Averick?

  Dude.

• 12:51Connor Wood?

  I also, like, if you're listening on audio, these are bracelets. The Taylor Swift effect has affected everyone.

• 12:57Brooke Averick?

  I already said what they were.

• 12:59Connor Wood?

  You just said bracelets, but these are ones I've gotten on tour. They're called, they're the ones that you get it to, like, you wear it at EDM concerts or Taylor Swift concerts. Player.

• 13:07Brooke Averick?

  This is good. N-F-P-M-S-M-O-T-T.

• 13:11Connor Wood?

  I don't know what that is.

• 13:12Brooke Averick?

  Let's figure it out.

• 13:13Connor Wood?

  I don't...

• 13:14Brooke Averick?

  Never forget.

• 13:17Brooke Averick?

  P-M-S.

• 13:20Brooke Averick?

  N-F-P-M-S. N-F-P-M-S-M-O-T-T.

• 13:27Brooke Averick?

  What the hell?

• 13:29Connor Wood?

  Let's leave that up.

• 13:29Brooke Averick?

  Notes.

• 13:30Connor Wood?

  Let's, let's just put that...

• 13:31Brooke Averick?

  It's the new 1975 album.

• 13:33Connor Wood?

  Is it?

• 13:35Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 13:36Connor Wood?

  Wow, nice shot. See, I wouldn't, I wouldn't have gotten that.

• 13:38Brooke Averick?

  I, I'm fucking with you, man.

• 13:39Connor Wood?

  Okay. I think we just put that out there and let people figure out what it is.

• 13:44Brooke Averick?

  Give me one minute. Give me 60 seconds.

• 13:46Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 13:46Brooke Averick?

  On the clock. Never forget, Pistol.

• 13:50Connor Wood?

  I don't...

• 13:52Brooke Averick?

  Nice, Fibula. Poop makes...

• 13:56Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh, this young woman and her...

• 13:58Brooke Averick?

  Nice, Fibula. Poop makes sense mostly only today, thanks.

• 14:04Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh, case closed. Good job.

• 14:06Brooke Averick?

  Thank you. This one says...

• 14:08Connor Wood?

  Nice, Fibula.

• 14:09Brooke Averick?

  Jonathan. I'll keep this one. I love him.

• 14:11Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that's cute.

• 14:13Brooke Averick?

  I love every Jonathan that I know. Oh my god, another Jonathan. Perfect. I know so many of them.

• 14:19Connor Wood?

  Mm-hmm.

• 14:20Brooke Averick?

  This one says... "Let's move on." Do you mind if I put this one on my other arm?

• 14:26Connor Wood?

  No, and I love that sentiment too, especially right now.

• 14:29Brooke Averick?

  Let's do the next one.

• 14:33Brooke Averick?

  Huh.

• 14:33Connor Wood?

  I think "Let's move on" could apply nicely right now to...

• 14:37Brooke Averick?

  Insta... Insta Jamie Eliza Beth.

• 14:42Connor Wood?

  Maybe that's her Instagram name?

• 14:47Brooke Averick?

  Also Elizabeth, like why?

• 14:49Connor Wood?

  Elizabeth?

• 14:51Brooke Averick?

  I've never had an issue with that one before. Okay, wait, this is another one.

• 14:54Connor Wood?

  Elizabeth.

• 14:55Brooke Averick?

  This is another one I want to try to crack out.

• 14:57Connor Wood?

  Go ahead and crack it out and through.

• 14:59Brooke Averick?

  CCFAFO.

• 15:03Connor Wood?

  I got it.

• 15:05Brooke Averick?

  Cancel culture fucks.

• 15:10Brooke Averick?

  Cancel culture fucks away.

• 15:16Brooke Averick?

  No, stop it. Oh my god, I got it. Sodhi's cat.

• 15:20Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 15:21Brooke Averick?

  Contested confetti.

• 15:24Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 15:25Brooke Averick?

  Fucks away.

• 15:27Connor Wood?

  Let's, come on.

• 15:28Brooke Averick?

  Okay, y'all, if you know what CCFAFO means.

• 15:33Connor Wood?

  I'm sure someone will be able to crack.

• 15:35Brooke Averick?

  Don't worry, we've got more.

• 15:36Connor Wood?

  The damn.

• 15:37Brooke Averick?

  Max, you want this one?

• 15:38Connor Wood?

  Code. Yeah, I'll take it. Thank you.

• 15:42Brooke Averick?

  Ooh, that one says BNCMAP. Want another Max? This one's a necklace.

• 15:46Connor Wood?

  That one I'm gonna, when I get.

• 15:47Brooke Averick?

  How about you put it on?

• 15:48Connor Wood?

  No, no, I'm gonna give it, I'm gonna put it on Max when he gets back.

• 15:51Brooke Averick?

  You want that one?

• 15:52Connor Wood?

  I'm like, good on bracelets, honestly. I really appreciate everyone, though. The only one I wear on my arm says Fabula.

• 15:59Connor Wood?

  Just in case I forget.

• 16:01Brooke Averick?

  What is this one? Maybe someone's Instagram name again. Maybe that's what they've all been this whole time. Legume.

• 16:08Connor Wood?

  Legume, that's cute.

• 16:09Brooke Averick?

  You want Legume?

• 16:10Connor Wood?

  No.

• 16:10Brooke Averick?

  Izzy, you want Legume? I could see you in it.

• 16:14Connor Wood?

  God damn.

• 16:14Brooke Averick?

  Could see you in nothing but that Legume bracelet. This one says Papa. BNCMAP, almost on the haul.

• 16:21Connor Wood?

  Okay, Brooke's almost done with her haul. I could have talked the whole time.

• 16:25Brooke Averick?

  Max.

• 16:28Brooke Averick?

  Fibs and Friends, pretty.

• 16:31Brooke Averick?

  Another Instagram handle.

• 16:34Brooke Averick?

  Hi all, in the Onyx shade.

• 16:37Connor Wood?

  What a great way to wrap that up. Thank you guys so much for listening.

• 16:42Brooke Averick?

  This has been Brooke and Connor Make a Puh.

• 16:45Connor Wood?

  Make a Puh Bracelet Haul.

• 16:47Brooke Averick?

  This has been Brooke and Connor Make a Stool Sample.

• 16:49Connor Wood?

  That's also about one one-hundredth of the amount of bracelets that I haven't unpacked yet from all my suitcases.

• 16:56Connor Wood?

  I'm really not looking forward to bringing a giant ass suitcase to overseas. Yeah, but it's just massive and I'm gonna have to roll with it onto the tube.

• 17:05Brooke Averick?

  Why are you gonna, why not, why not just go?

• 17:09Connor Wood?

  Cause it's in the 30s there right now.

• 17:11Brooke Averick?

  Just wear everything on the plane?

• 17:14Connor Wood?

  I get hot on planes.

• 17:15Brooke Averick?

  Take it off then, once you get on.

• 17:19Connor Wood?

  I, I wanna wear, like, for the first time ever, I wanna wear Cozy's. And I wanna be someone who like-

• 17:25Brooke Averick?

  For the first time ever?

• 17:26Connor Wood?

  Yeah, on a plane.

• 17:28Brooke Averick?

  What do you usually wear?

• 17:29Connor Wood?

  Like, stuff that's daytime wear.

• 17:32Brooke Averick?

  I have never in my life worn a daytime piece on the plane.

• 17:36Connor Wood?

  You? And you would have exploded with my mom. She wears all white, she wears jeans, white jeans, white sweater.

• 17:47Connor Wood?

  Like, tan sandals or boots.

• 17:50Brooke Averick?

  I'm so curious, like, about nature and nurture, like, what would have happened if your mom was my mom? With my temperament?

• 17:56Connor Wood?

  Well, your mom is similar but different.

• 18:01Brooke Averick?

  No, like,

• 18:03Brooke Averick?

  my parents were never, like,

• 18:07Brooke Averick?

  strict or like, they didn't like, not saying your mom is strict, but like, I didn't have any sort of like,

• 18:14Brooke Averick?

  do this. Does that make sense?

• 18:16Connor Wood?

  No, mine wasn't like, do this, it was like, we dress nice for the airport.

• 18:19Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I didn't have any, any things like that. Like, my parents slept in on the weekends. And wore, and wore pajamas, like, to pick me up from school.

• 18:27Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I don't even...

• 18:31Connor Wood?

  Yeah, no, that's two very specific examples of things that

• 18:35Brooke Averick?

  Like, I, there were so many weekends I never even came out of my room. I was just reading and writing and, and being in my pajamas.

• 18:43Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh, crack of the ass of dawn.

• 18:49Brooke Averick?

  That's what I'm saying.

• 18:50Connor Wood?

  My mom would come in, I'd hear her come in.

• 18:51Brooke Averick?

  I could've gone a weekend without seeing my parents.

• 18:54Connor Wood?

  Oh my god, they would call-

• 18:55Brooke Averick?

  I was busy.

• 18:56Connor Wood?

  They would call the cops on me, they'd be like, I think he's depressed. My mom would come in every morning, crack my blinds, be like, by the way, sunlight's healthy.

• 19:01Brooke Averick?

  Well, but my, my whole family's depressed, so I guess that helped.

• 19:05Connor Wood?

  That does help.

• 19:07Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 19:08Brooke Averick?

  Tell me more, tell me more.

• 19:10Connor Wood?

  I still get like this guttural feeling about having to mow the lawn on Saturdays.

• 19:17Connor Wood?

  So hard. You ever get mad? You you know when, okay, I don't know. You can relate to this, I'm I'm sure. My examples, you're just gonna have to turn into examples for yourself.

• 19:26Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 19:26Connor Wood?

  Okay. There are times when like I'm having kind of like a shitty day where like I'm about to cry. And then my headphones will get caught on a handle of a door, my wired headphones.

• 19:37Brooke Averick?

  Of course.

• 19:38Connor Wood?

  And I just want to break, rip, rip these up.

• 19:41Brooke Averick?

  Punch a hole in the wall.

• 19:42Connor Wood?

  The, oh my god, I talked about the day that I I went out to, because I was already mad at my parents. They were like, you need to go out and you need to do this.

• 19:48Brooke Averick?

  The lawnmower.

• 19:49Connor Wood?

  And it's like, as soon as you you were ahead of it, like one time I mowed the lawn and then my parents were like, oh, if you've already done that, you can go ahead and blow out the driveway with the leaf blower. And I was like.

• 19:57Brooke Averick?

  Blow out the driveway?

• 19:58Connor Wood?

  I had to blow out the driveway. What else? What would you call it?

• 20:03Brooke Averick?

  Leaf blow the driveway?

• 20:05Connor Wood?

  Oh, I just shortened it to blow.

• 20:08Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, just blow up the driveway.

• 20:09Connor Wood?

  Just blow out the driveway. And I was mad because I was like, I already did my thing that I was supposed to do. What the hell? And so I went out to do that and I went to fill it up with gas. Maybe I've already told this story, but if you haven't heard it, here it is. And it's only like a little tiny thing of gas in the leaf blower. So when I put the whole gas thing in, it filled up so fast that it shot back out into my eyes. And I was like, ah, oh my god, I'm so pissed up. And so I just punched a hole in the drywall. Like it, like I was like, I'm so mad at everything. I'm mad at inanimate objects.

• 20:42Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 20:42Connor Wood?

  I'm mad at fossil fuels. I'm mad at the leaf blower. I'm mad at my wired headphones. Oh, they would rip out all the time when I was listening to like.

• 20:50Brooke Averick?

  Oh, my god.

• 20:50Connor Wood?

  Black Eyed Peas.

• 20:53Connor Wood?

  Low energy, unfocused, foggy, you might be dehydrated. Gatorade Zero Powder.

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• 21:22Speaker 01

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• 21:52Brooke Averick?

  What's worse? I already know the answer, sorry.

• 21:56Connor Wood?

  What?

• 21:58Brooke Averick?

  It's a stupid question. Catching your wire on something or having an AirPod fall slip out of your ear?

• 22:04Connor Wood?

  I don't, I don't have like that much experience with AirPods.

• 22:09Connor Wood?

  I'm different.

• 22:10Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, you are. The answer is getting the wire caught.

• 22:15Connor Wood?

  Well, the wire hurts too. And then it unplugs, so it's not like you can.

• 22:18Brooke Averick?

  Oh, it's, I can't, it's pissing me off.

• 22:20Connor Wood?

  It's pissing me off.

• 22:21Brooke Averick?

  It's pissing me off.

• 22:23Connor Wood?

  But I just learned, I just saw this tweet, I don't know if it's true, but it makes sense. I guess someone tweeted and they were like, do you know how much? I know, every time I talk about radiation, people are like, do you know how much radiation is in your body? That's happening, like you have five cameras pointed at you. AirPods are the least of your worries, king. But they said that AirPods produce so much radiation and it just zaps right through your brain.

• 22:46Brooke Averick?

  There's no way.

• 22:47Connor Wood?

  Well, it kind of makes sense because they have to be connected to shit.

• 22:50Brooke Averick?

  Just try not to think about it.

• 22:52Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I'm sure having my AirPods in will help with that, actually.

• 22:55Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 22:56Connor Wood?

  Lebotomy. Electric lobotomy. Electroshock therapy lobotomy.

• 23:02Brooke Averick?

  No, if I wouldn't, I use my AirPods so much that I could, would tell you if I've been lobotomized and I haven't yet.

• 23:08Connor Wood?

  You don't think it's, like, you don't think you're getting.

• 23:10Brooke Averick?

  I still have too many problems.

• 23:12Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 23:14Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, wait, that's true.

• 23:15Connor Wood?

  Wait, so true?

• 23:16Brooke Averick?

  Wait, oh my god, yes.

• 23:18Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 23:19Brooke Averick?

  Yup.

• 23:20Connor Wood?

  Um, here's one thing that I have trouble with at the airport that I'm just gonna talk about the airport one more time. I really would love to be a guy that carries a briefcase cuz I feel like I would look so cool.

• 23:29Brooke Averick?

  You would.

• 23:31Connor Wood?

  Rock, I know, but, um...

• 23:34Brooke Averick?

  My brother carried a briefcase instead of a backpack to school when he was younger.

• 23:37Connor Wood?

  Was he bullied?

• 23:38Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 23:39Connor Wood?

  Whoa!

• 23:40Brooke Averick?

  Nope, no bullying policy.

• 23:43Connor Wood?

  And it worked? I'm pretty sure all schools have a no bullying policy.

• 23:46Brooke Averick?

  I'm telling you.

• 23:49Brooke Averick?

  Like genuinely, I think so.

• 23:53Brooke Averick?

  I don't think there was bullying in the, in the lower school.

• 23:57Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh.

• 23:58Brooke Averick?

  I really believe that.

• 24:00Connor Wood?

  When I think about bullying, it was like not ever who like needed to be bullied. Like where bullying needed to happen, it wasn't happening.

• 24:10Brooke Averick?

  That's true. And I also look back, I don't know if I said this recently here on Obsessed, I look back on things that people said to me in like middle school.

• 24:20Connor Wood?

  Bullying.

• 24:20Brooke Averick?

  I was like, oh my god, I was bullied to the gods, but I didn't let myself be bullied. I was just like, that is so fucking funny, you guys, seriously.

• 24:30Connor Wood?

  Bro, yeah, me too. I, I think about that a lot.

• 24:34Brooke Averick?

  And I really believed it was funny.

• 24:35Connor Wood?

  I think, I feel sorry for kids, not to get all sad, but like they, that's so sad. You just really have to stick it out.

• 24:42Brooke Averick?

  You just have to stick it out.

• 24:44Connor Wood?

  I look at all these cameras right here and I say, never kill yourself, because my high school bullies are simply, I had, I had one apologize to me and be like, I'm sorry, and I'm like, I forgot about you.

• 24:55Brooke Averick?

  But you're still thinking about me.

• 24:56Connor Wood?

  I'm so glad that you're thinking about me, though.

• 24:58Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 24:58Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 25:00Connor Wood?

  What movie did I watch the other day? Oh, um, Billy Madison, was it?

• 25:06Connor Wood?

  On my half TV? I watched Billy Madison, one of them, he calls his someone he bullied in high school and was like, "Hey," and it's Steve Buscemi that answers the phone. And he's like, "Hey, um, I just wanna say I'm really sorry for everything I said to you." And Steve Buscemi's like, "Hey, man, literally no worries." And Adam Sandler's like, "I'd love to get a coffee or something soon." And he's like, "Steve Buscemi?" He's like, "Yeah, I'd really like that." And then they hang up and he turns to the wall behind him and crosses Adam's name off his list. And then right when Adam Sandler's about to get shot, he steps in and shoots the guy. And so he had a gun and he had a list on his wall.

• 25:42Brooke Averick?

  Whoa.

• 25:42Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 25:43Brooke Averick?

  I've never seen that film.

• 25:45Connor Wood?

  Um, Adam Sandler has a collection of films like Billy Madison and like Mr. Deeds and like-

• 25:51Brooke Averick?

  I really like Big Daddy.

• 25:52Connor Wood?

  Big Daddy. There's a collection of films that he must have signed the Glenn Powell contract of like the 90s or whenever those came out.

• 25:59Brooke Averick?

  That is such a feel-good film.

• 26:02Connor Wood?

  It really is. All of his are. It is just go- it goes back to that thing where it's like he plays almost the same character in everything and it's so good and it's so typecast. He'll go down in history as just like a character.

• 26:15Brooke Averick?

  I think he's already down in it.

• 26:16Connor Wood?

  Well, I mean, like, he'll go down more in history, I think, when he's older. He hasn't- it seems like he's kind of just like-

• 26:22Brooke Averick?

  You know, it was a flop.

• 26:24Connor Wood?

  What?

• 26:24Brooke Averick?

  Hubie Halloween.

• 26:25Connor Wood?

  I don't know what that is.

• 26:26Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 26:28Connor Wood?

  But he- he's typecast as well into that, like, "Well, I'm gonna go ahead and have Jennifer Aniston be my love interest in this one."

• 26:34Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 26:35Connor Wood?

  And then the next one, I'm gonna have just like every single woman in all of his films is just-

• 26:41Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 26:41Connor Wood?

  Angelina Jolie and-

• 26:44Brooke Averick?

  Brooklyn Decker, etc.

• 26:45Connor Wood?

  Andy Roddick was in the film I watched last night. Oh, Just Go With It. I watched that last night. Andy Roddick's at the end. Tennis player.

• 26:53Brooke Averick?

  It's a great movie.

• 26:54Connor Wood?

  It really is. Okay, what the hell? How did we do- do- do that?

• 26:58Brooke Averick?

  Well, we were supposed to talk about dreams today.

• 27:00Connor Wood?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:01Brooke Averick?

  I- I just like, I guess I was thinking about dreams, maybe when I fell asleep or something. I had the weirdest dream. I wrote it down.

• 27:11Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I didn't read it, so I want you to tell me how blind react to it.

• 27:14Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 27:15Connor Wood?

  But we had everybody send in their own dreams and also, just like Evergreen, that submission box that lives, or is it in the link in our bio? It's in the link in our bio. It's always open. You guys can write in whenever.

• 27:28Brooke Averick?

  You really can.

• 27:29Connor Wood?

  If anything happens, also, like, I would love to do something where it's just like, you write in, something that happens, we give you a little bit of advice, or something, whatever we can do, and then we have like an ongoing situation where we're like working with you, working through things in real time, IRT.

• 27:47Brooke Averick?

  That could be really fun.

• 27:48Connor Wood?

  That could be fun for us. Okay, go ahead.

• 27:50Brooke Averick?

  Okay. Um, so I don't know if you know that Kindle has finally launched a color, a colored Kindle.

• 27:59Connor Wood?

  I know that because I saw them at Best Buy when I got my TV last week.

• 28:02Brooke Averick?

  Really?

• 28:02Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 28:03Brooke Averick?

  Um, so they launched the colored Kindle, the Kindle Color Soft, but it's had so many complaints because it just like is slow moving apparently and the color is like very muted.

• 28:12Connor Wood?

  I noticed that. I was tapping it and I was like, is this a display? And they're like, no, that works. I'm like, I can't, you can't drag anything.

• 28:19Brooke Averick?

  So now when you go to order, you can never drag on a Kindle.

• 28:23Connor Wood?

  What the hell?

• 28:24Brooke Averick?

  It's like not on iPad. No, the glare. But now when you go to order it,

• 28:31Brooke Averick?

  it says three to five weeks to ship, so I think they're like

• 28:34Connor Wood?

  Fixing it?

• 28:34Brooke Averick?

  overhauling it. Yeah, but anyway, some influencers did get the Kindle Color Soft. Um, some of them did. Some people might not know that some influencers did get them, so. Okay, I had a dream about the Kindle Color Soft and I was invited to, um, the Amazon launch event.

• 28:54Connor Wood?

  Oh, I was gonna say, Amazon, the rainforest?

• 28:56Brooke Averick?

  No, the Amazon launch event of the Kindle Color Soft at Amazon headquarters

• 29:00Connor Wood?

  Good.

• 29:01Brooke Averick?

  in Los Angeles, California, okay? Um, I was welcomed with open arms into the Amazon studio. I was with my friend Jen and they said, "Welcome to the Kindle Color Soft launch experience. Here, please," and they held out on a platter, like, "Please take one of these each for the, um, optimal experience." It was a gummy.

• 29:23Connor Wood?

  I keep finishing your sentences in my head. I thought you were gonna say, "It was a gun."

• 29:27Brooke Averick?

  No, it was a gummy.

• 29:28Connor Wood?

  I'm like, whoa.

• 29:28Brooke Averick?

  And I was like, "Oh, great. How many milligrams?" I popped it, swallowed. How many milligrams is that? 250. Okay, perfect. So then me and Jen go into this like little box and are literally like in my dream I'm like on acid. Okay, and we're like experiencing the Kindle Color Soft and it's looking like the most insane piece of technology in the world. And I guess like because it flopped so much like they really had to drug me in order in order for me to feel like it was a premium experience. Yeah. Then, so we're in the orb experiencing the Kindle Color Soft. The Kindle Color Soft. Then Jada Pickett Smith and Will Smith walk by.

• 30:07Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 30:08Brooke Averick?

  And Jen says something kind of like I couldn't even make out what she said to Jada. And Jada and Will give her daggers, okay?

• 30:16Connor Wood?

  That's not like Jada.

• 30:17Brooke Averick?

  And they keep walking and then me and Jen are like, oh shit, like I don't know what that was about. Jada comes back and is to Jen, my friend Jen is like, how fucking dare you talk to my husband that way? Like you piece of shit, like, like I hope, like I hope you never get this Kindle Color Soft. Like I hope they don't pick you, like blah, blah, blah, blah, all this stuff. And I'm sitting there completely nonverbal. I don't even know what Jen had said to offend her so much. Then Jada looks at me and she goes, I need you to take a stance. I don't, you can't just sit there. You can just sit there. Is it her or is it me? Do you support what she said to me? And I was like, Jada, here's the thing, I'm on 250 right now.

• 30:58Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 30:59Brooke Averick?

  So whatever Jen said to you, please know that that was from the 250 MG. That we had both taken and that it is not a reflection on you or Will Smith.

• 31:12Connor Wood?

  Or me as her friend.

• 31:13Brooke Averick?

  And she goes, oh my God, that is hysterical. Then me, Jada, Jen are cracking the fuck up. Jada gets her own Kindle Color Soft. Okay, she's in the orb. Everything is fine. Okay?

• 31:26Brooke Averick?

  Meanwhile, my Uber's here. Again, Uber, you're in it. Okay, you had literally, I forgot to mention this morning, we, I guess we live together or something, you were hyping me up so much about the Kindle Color Soft experience. You were like, I'm so proud of you. You have worked so hard to get this Kindle Color Soft. By the way, Amazon did not send this to me and I think this, the dream is like a huge reflection of that. And you're like, you worked so hard. I'm so proud of you. Like, everything that you've worked for is, has led up to this day. Like, couldn't be more proud of you. Love you so much. And I was like, oh my god, Connor, like, thank you so much. Like, I really felt so treasured by you that morning, okay?

• 32:10Brooke Averick?

  So then I get into the Uber, I've got the Kindle Color Soft in my satchel. I get into the Uber. I'm like, hey Connor, and you're like, how was it? And I was like, it was so great. Thank you so much. Like, couldn't have done it without your support. I get a text, it's a group chat. Me, you, and my brother. Happy birthday Connor. This whole time I didn't realize it was 9/11. This is like a full, remember me starring Robert Pattinson? It was 9/11 the whole time. Okay?

• 32:36Connor Wood?

  Oh my god.

• 32:38Brooke Averick?

  I look over to you, I feel so fucking horrible. You, this whole morning, had hyped me up so much and I forgot it was your birthday. But when I look back at you, you're completely black out drunk, covered in marinara sauce.

• 32:54Brooke Averick?

  Covered in marinara sauce. And I was like, oh my god, what happened? You can't even get the words out, you're slurring so much. I don't know what happened. So I'm like, fuck, I have to in-feed right now for his birthday. So I took, all I could do was take a photo of you in the marinara sauce and I posted feed, "Happy birthday to the greatest guy I know. Thanks for always being there."

• 33:16Brooke Averick?

  So the Uber driver is like, I've gotta get him to Bertucci's. Do you know Bertucci's?

• 33:20Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 33:21Brooke Averick?

  I've gotta get him to Bertucci's for his reservation.

• 33:28Brooke Averick?

  We were running late.

• 33:30Connor Wood?

  What about me? What about my outfit?

• 33:32Brooke Averick?

  You are going to Bertucci's right now.

• 33:33Connor Wood?

  I know, what about me and my, I'm covered in marinara?

• 33:35Brooke Averick?

  I think it had something to do with your reservation.

• 33:37Connor Wood?

  With Bertucci's?

• 33:39Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, but the whole time you were just picking up. So you got back in the Uber.

• 33:45Connor Wood?

  I was picking up Bertucci's? You guys getting it to go?

• 33:49Brooke Averick?

  That was the reservation.

• 33:51Connor Wood?

  So it didn't matter that I was covered?

• 33:52Brooke Averick?

  Then you got it back and then I got out of the Uber quickly to run into the house to like, ready the birthday for you, but you never came in. And then I went back outside and I was like, where's Connor? And the Uber driver was like, he never paid me back for the Bertucci's. And that's where the dream ended.

• 34:12Connor Wood?

  I wonder why I ended up going? That's like scaring me.

• 34:14Brooke Averick?

  I think it was implied that he killed you. That was my understanding because you, he spotted you for the Bertucci's. And you, I had rushed into the house. I couldn't even spot you for the Bertucci's. Like I didn't even think to pay for your Bertucci's and because of that you didn't have the money. And it was implied that he had discharged of you.

• 34:34Connor Wood?

  He just took care of me and I'm covered in marinara.

• 34:36Brooke Averick?

  Took care of it.

• 34:37Connor Wood?

  I'm covered in marinara the whole time.

• 34:38Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 34:40Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh.

• 34:41Brooke Averick?

  And then that lit, like I was so upset that that photo of you in marinara sauce was in my feed when like, how the day turned out. With you being like completely, probably shot.

• 34:54Connor Wood?

  By the Uber driver. No, it's crazy because like that would be, that's like what we talked about the other day. I was like, what's your last memory? Like the last thing you post on your way out? Like what's your last journal entry? Like the Queen of England having her last journal entry was only five words that they won't share with us. And like my last journal entry in your journal is me blackout drunk.

• 35:15Brooke Averick?

  It's just my in-feed of you and marinara sauce.

• 35:17Connor Wood?

  Marinara sauce, man.

• 35:18Brooke Averick?

  So when I woke up, I was like eager to write my dream down before I forgot it. And so what I wrote was Kindle color soft Jada Pinkett Smith, you were so proud of me. And then my brother texted you, happy birthday. I forgot it was nine 11, you were covered in sauce. Put that on my tombstone.

• 35:35Connor Wood?

  I don't know why that's like making me so nervous.

• 35:39Brooke Averick?

  No, I think it says more about me, obviously than like, I think you, you were the hero in that story.

• 35:45Connor Wood?

  I died a martyr, covered in sauce.

• 35:47Brooke Averick?

  You 100% did, and your death was my fault.

• 35:50Connor Wood?

  Oh, my gosh. Well, try to, try to lose a dream tonight and get like some closure for me. I want I need, we need to like, kill that Uber driver.

• 35:58Brooke Averick?

  We never, like, your, your body was never found, so the story's not over.

• 36:02Connor Wood?

  But it didn't seem like you looked for it. No offense.

• 36:04Brooke Averick?

  I don't, like, it gets fuzzy after that.

• 36:06Connor Wood?

  Maybe you were blackout drunk.

• 36:07Brooke Averick?

  Just like, everything was implied towards the end.

• 36:10Connor Wood?

  I think it's scary that like, here you are on 250 milligrams of weed, here I am blackout drunk over to marinara sauce, like it's the blind leading the blind. We only had our Uber driver.

• 36:19Brooke Averick?

  I think he scammed you.

• 36:22Connor Wood?

  Into?

• 36:22Brooke Averick?

  Maybe you didn't even have the reservation. I don't know. Anyway, what do you make of the dream? Like, if you had to analyze it?

• 36:29Connor Wood?

  Um, a lot of things. I think there's maybe something that's so specific to the, to the Kindle situation that like, I think it just means that like, you really wanted a Kindle. I think that that's.

• 36:39Brooke Averick?

  Color soft, yeah. Joke's on them. Now it's taking three to five weeks.

• 36:44Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 36:44Brooke Averick?

  Chip out.

• 36:45Connor Wood?

  I mean, God works mysterious ways. Um, me being blackout drunk, covered in marinara sauce scares me that you had a dream about that. But more so, I think that's just an anxiety dream about you forgetting someone's birthday. Because that's like an anxiety dream that like everybody has where it's like, oh, my gosh, I'm late for a test. I forgot about the test. Like, I forgot what day it is. I think it's a really common anxiety dream.

• 37:08Brooke Averick?

  I also feel like it's not to like, get super therapeutic and analyze myself. I have been feeling recently like I haven't been as good of a friend to everyone as I should be. Cause I've been so wrapped up in my book.

• 37:22Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 37:22Brooke Averick?

  That like, I have been so like, inside of myself.

• 37:26Connor Wood?

  Even inside yourself.

• 37:28Brooke Averick?

  So inside myself that I feel like I keep forgetting to ask people how they are. Like truly. And so I think that's a reflection of that of just like me feeling like I haven't been a good friend recently.

• 37:39Connor Wood?

  Well, the marinara sauce kind of throws it around and then me being shot to death with a gun also kind of throws.

• 37:45Brooke Averick?

  You could have been poisoned. I don't know with the way he disposed of you.

• 37:48Connor Wood?

  I feel like the way that you are describing like it's definitely a shot and I'm in his trunk.

• 37:52Brooke Averick?

  It was almost mob related. Maybe just like there's an, maybe that was related.

• 37:57Connor Wood?

  Cause he's a Jersey bob too, but they're Italian. Cause of the sauce and the Bertucci of it all.

• 38:01Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 38:02Connor Wood?

  Maybe he was of the Bertucci family. He's a Bertucci family heir.

• 38:07Brooke Averick?

  Watch like next week Bertucci like mob related scandal comes out.

• 38:11Connor Wood?

  We get an email from an anonymous account that's just like, hey, we'd love to chat about the marinara, about the sauce.

• 38:17Brooke Averick?

  About the sauce.

• 38:19Connor Wood?

  Um, I do wish that I had dreams like that.

• 38:22Brooke Averick?

  That's, that's rare. I don't have dreams that much anymore.

• 38:25Connor Wood?

  I mean, I don't want anyone to die in my dreams. All of my dreams are like, it's the end of the world and I'm trying to get like my family. It's like my family needs to get in the house and like, there's also someone trying to kill me specifically. Like the end of the world is my fault. But it's like the apocalypse.

• 38:41Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 38:41Connor Wood?

  Why don't, or like I have two sides of the spectrum. It's like the world is ending or like I am going swimming in this awesome lagoon. And it's like, there are, it's like a perfect lagoon where it's like, I'm getting in and there is like literally like an octopus and like a sea turtle and it's very colorful. And there's a place to sit and like put your stuff and it's like perfect. And then you like, it's not dangerous in the oceans right there, but like the lagoon is like safe and you can swim in it and snorkel. And it's like perfect and safe and like nice and you can like relax, but there's like critters in it that you can go see.

• 39:14Brooke Averick?

  I don't think I've ever had a dream that's just like relaxing like that.

• 39:19Connor Wood?

  Well, no, it's always starts relaxing and then it's like, uh oh tsunami.

• 39:22Brooke Averick?

  Uh huh.

• 39:22Connor Wood?

  Like I'm in the perfect lagoon and then there's a tsunami coming or like all of a sudden there's like literally the Russians are here to kill us. Like it's like literally you hear planes in the distance.

• 39:31Brooke Averick?

  Why is it always the Russians for you?

• 39:33Connor Wood?

  Well, I'm just thinking of who would approach us on the coast. China or the Russians now.

• 39:38Brooke Averick?

  Because of geography?

• 39:39Connor Wood?

  Yeah. Someone from overseas, which like it's not gonna be, Mexico isn't gonna approach us on the sea. Also, I don't think that they would like militarize Lee.

• 39:48Brooke Averick?

  You have no idea, they could get on the Royal Caribbean.

• 39:50Connor Wood?

  Militarily, like come out.

• 39:52Brooke Averick?

  Cruise from Cozumel.

• 39:53Connor Wood?

  Go out into the Gulf of Mexico and come back in and attack Texas via sea. I'm thinking more like air strike.

• 40:00Brooke Averick?

  Oh my god. Did I, I don't know if I wanna talk about bombs right now. But in 7th grade.

• 40:07Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:09Brooke Averick?

  Our art teacher showed us.

• 40:12Connor Wood?

  What did your art teacher show you in 7th grade related to bombs?

• 40:15Brooke Averick?

  The most graphic animated telling of the Hiroshima bombings. And it was, cuz we were doing like a Japanese art unit. This wasn't okay, the specific video.

• 40:29Connor Wood?

  Oh, they, they showed you video?

• 40:30Brooke Averick?

  A video, it was animated, but it was so graphic. It showed everything, the bomb dropping. People, like I can't even say.

• 40:40Connor Wood?

  Oh, don't then.

• 40:41Brooke Averick?

  So bloody and graphic.

• 40:42Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:43Brooke Averick?

  And for years after that video, every time I heard a plane. That was it.

• 40:50Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:51Brooke Averick?

  That was it. And she got in a lot of trouble for showing us that.

• 40:55Connor Wood?

  I bet. Um, it's crazy the things that people like teachers did and then they're like.

• 41:00Brooke Averick?

  This feels right.

• 41:01Connor Wood?

  Wait, in hindsight, yeah, why did I do that?

• 41:03Brooke Averick?

  Wait, this feels right?

• 41:04Connor Wood?

  Teachers are like, hmm, yeah. We had a teacher get fired because he showed Ted, the like, the like weed smoking bear movie.

• 41:12Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, he probably should've.

• 41:13Connor Wood?

  So like teachers are showing Hiroshima bombing graphic images and then Ted? And like, ours was fired. But it also sucks cuz I'm pretty sure we convinced him to play that.

• 41:24Brooke Averick?

  That sucks.

• 41:25Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 41:26Brooke Averick?

  One time my teacher clicked on a link and then porn popped up all over the projector.

• 41:30Connor Wood?

  Oh my god.

• 41:31Brooke Averick?

  And then he threw himself in front of the projector and then the porn was just playing on his back.

• 41:39Connor Wood?

  We had, do you remember the projector where it's just like, it's literally this giant thing? This giant base and then like a crane?

• 41:47Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, projector.

• 41:48Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I mean, I'm sure they don't look like that.

• 41:50Brooke Averick?

  Right, that's true.

• 41:51Connor Wood?

  Like, that is, that was a beast of mankind. They probably, oh no, there's like a scanner that sits on the desk next to their computer now, and it's just a camera. But the projector was like an actual like light bending device.

• 42:03Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 42:04Connor Wood?

  That's crazy. Now it's just a camera.

• 42:06Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I feel like most of them, like, were on the ceiling in school. But like, the light bending device was for like still images.

• 42:14Connor Wood?

  This is what I'm talking about.

• 42:14Brooke Averick?

  This was for like still images, but I'm talking about like.

• 42:17Connor Wood?

  It's just straight up called an old school projector. Well, that's what we had. Uh, my school was broke, I think. But, um, our teacher had pulled up something on his phone, and it was like, he had left it up. I don't really understand how it got to his texts. But it got to his texts, or maybe he was like mirroring, he dragged, he shared his screen to the thing and his texts were open, and it was graphic sexting between him and one of the female soccer coaches. Sexting. And, nothing happened.

• 42:56Brooke Averick?

  But that's not a, that's fine.

• 42:58Connor Wood?

  Nothing happened because I think it was like senior year of high school. I think he was embarrassed. But, really, truly, and like, I don't even want to say this because it does sound, you know my heart, obviously, but like, they were both really attractive, so I don't think that they got in trouble. It was like, it was, they were probably, honestly.

• 43:16Brooke Averick?

  But also, they're two consenting adults.

• 43:18Connor Wood?

  I know. But like, we saw it, you know?

• 43:20Brooke Averick?

  Was it images?

• 43:21Connor Wood?

  No, like gra, I can't remember exactly what it said, but it was literally like a Sabrina Carpenter song.

• 43:26Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 43:27Connor Wood?

  "I'm gonna pin you down on the carpet and paint pictures with my tongue."

• 43:30Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 43:30Connor Wood?

  Like, kinda that sort of thing. And she was like, "Have you ever tried this one before?"

• 43:34Brooke Averick?

  I feel, yeah, I feel like that's not fireable, honestly.

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• 44:52Speaker 06

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• 44:54Connor Wood?

  Try one.

• 44:56Speaker 06

  Mmm.

• 45:00Connor Wood?

  King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. There's nothing like it.

• 45:08Connor Wood?

  Yeah, honestly, looking back, it's really weird to say because I was 16, 17 when that happened, but they were probably 27.

• 45:15Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 45:16Connor Wood?

  It's like, completely fine.

• 45:18Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, completely fine.

• 45:19Connor Wood?

  Even a little bit hot.

• 45:20Brooke Averick?

  Even a little bit hot, if I do say so myself.

• 45:22Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 45:24Brooke Averick?

  I'm sure the principal was like, "Pop off, you guys."

• 45:26Connor Wood?

  Probably like, yeah, just like, just don't do it again.

• 45:29Brooke Averick?

  Did you ever, you know how there were like, when there were two teachers that were like, youngish and the same age, like, you automatically were like, "They're fucking"?

• 45:35Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 45:36Brooke Averick?

  I would love to go back in time. We had like, two teachers that we specifically were like, "You guys are endgame." We would always say something, like, we had like, a couple name for them. I would love to go back in time and ask them, like, "What was that like for you?" Did you guys ever?

• 45:51Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 45:52Brooke Averick?

  Did you hate each other? Did you hate us? Like?

• 45:54Connor Wood?

  I would say 99% of the time, if two like young, attractive teachers are single, they probably have, they were probably one step ahead of all of the students thinking that they're really doing something like, "Hey, we have a good idea." I bet like them being coworkers was enough for them to have gotten something going outside. Like happy hour with like a teacher? I learned recently, like at my shows, how many teachers are out on a Tuesday, Wednesday at one of my stand-up shows, ordering three, four drinks. I'm like, "And you have class tomorrow."

• 46:25Brooke Averick?

  And they're, and they'll play a movie.

• 46:27Connor Wood?

  They were like, "We're doing movie day tomorrow. We're rolling out a TV."

• 46:30Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 46:30Connor Wood?

  Rolling out a TV. That's gonna become-

• 46:32Brooke Averick?

  I wish I had gotten the opportunity-

• 46:34Connor Wood?

  To roll out a TV?

• 46:35Brooke Averick?

  To roll out a TV, but we weren't allowed.

• 46:37Connor Wood?

  Oh, cuz-

• 46:38Brooke Averick?

  Like it's preschool.

• 46:40Connor Wood?

  I mean, that sounds like it should be TV day every day.

• 46:42Brooke Averick?

  I know. Wasn't.

• 46:44Connor Wood?

  Bluey, every single day. I love Bluey, by the way. That TV show's good.

• 46:49Brooke Averick?

  I never seen Bluey. Here, it's okay.

• 46:52Connor Wood?

  Um, should we read some of other, other people's dreams?

• 46:54Brooke Averick?

  I guess we should read at least one dream.

• 46:56Connor Wood?

  So this one, I'm just gonna start it out with this. I don't really understand,

• 47:04Connor Wood?

  if this was a dream, or if this was just a random submission? So I'm just gonna read it.

• 47:12Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 47:13Connor Wood?

  "I invented a robotic penis, parentheses, I'm a girl."

• 47:17Brooke Averick?

  Okay, I'm going with dream, but let's read it.

• 47:21Connor Wood?

  That's it.

• 47:22Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 47:24Connor Wood?

  So. She, what did she?

• 47:27Brooke Averick?

  Oh, well-

• 47:27Connor Wood?

  Does she think she invented a vibrator?

• 47:29Brooke Averick?

  Right.

• 47:32Connor Wood?

  I don't know. Okay.

• 47:33Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 47:33Connor Wood?

  We'll chalk it up to if that's-

• 47:35Brooke Averick?

  A lot of women in STEM making themselves known today.

• 47:38Connor Wood?

  Yes.

• 47:40Connor Wood?

  Once I'd had a day, not a daydream, one-

• 47:42Brooke Averick?

  Penis envy, Freud would say.

• 47:45Connor Wood?

  Yeah, penis envy.

• 47:47Brooke Averick?

  That's the term.

• 47:48Connor Wood?

  Maybe something to look into. You know who you are? Once I had a dream that I attended my own funeral. It took place at my old high school and all my friends were there and my family

• 47:58Connor Wood?

  was there too, and I was literally an invisible ghost waltzing around. The worst part was it was an open casket. So not only was I at my own funeral via ghost, I was looking at myself dead. I'm still traumatized and think about it all the time. This was like three years ago.

• 48:12Brooke Averick?

  That's horrible.

• 48:13Connor Wood?

  That is horrible. However, like I do love the idea of going to your own funeral. I feel like if I know I'm gonna die, like I would love to have a pre-funeral that everyone could come to. I, I, I know that like I'm not gonna get FOMO in the afterlife, but like, why not have one last hurrah? And I can get, I can pick the playlist and I can be there and be like, you guys, literally, I'm still here. This is my pre-funeral. Let's have some fun. This beat is stick. And I wanna have a-

• 48:41Brooke Averick?

  Beat is so sick.

• 48:42Connor Wood?

  This is, this beat is stick.

• 48:43Brooke Averick?

  This is fucking sick.

• 48:44Connor Wood?

  I wanna take a ride on your disco stick.

• 48:45Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I've had dreams where I-

• 48:47Connor Wood?

  Come on, I'm just a girl. I invented a penis. I invented a robot penis. Just circling back to that quickly.

• 48:54Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 48:55Connor Wood?

  I wanna go to my own funeral. I think that we should have-

• 48:57Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 48:57Connor Wood?

  I think we should have pre-funerals.

• 48:58Brooke Averick?

  I wanna do that and not be dead.

• 49:00Connor Wood?

  Yeah, so it would be like a pre-funeral. Like, I think if I get up there, I wanna have some sort of large soiree and be like, I'm not gonna be here forever, but like, I'm acknowledging that when my funeral comes, like, I came to my first one. I don't need to go to two.

• 49:14Brooke Averick?

  But there was a book I read when I was younger and this girl got hit by a car and just like, died completely suddenly and was like 12 or something.

• 49:21Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 49:21Brooke Averick?

  And she had to watch her funeral like from above and like, watch how everyone coped with her like very unexpected death.

• 49:27Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 49:27Brooke Averick?

  And she couldn't like reach out to them, but she could see everything and she was there, she just couldn't reach them. That would be like completely the worst thing that I could ever imagine.

• 49:36Connor Wood?

  I would just be mad if someone was telling a story and I was like, that is not what happened. No, no. I paid for dinner that night. That's why we got, you know, like, and they tell like a, a story wrong. I'd be like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You always change that part. You do not remember it right. My mom cannot remember any stories with, with the facts. There is, the, there is her truth, my truth, and then the truth.

• 49:58Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 49:59Connor Wood?

  And she's not-

• 50:00Brooke Averick?

  None of them have anything in common.

• 50:01Connor Wood?

  She's not willing to budge on-

• 50:05Connor Wood?

  Her version. And it's funny, so that has become a character building thing for me. The fact that like, she remembers things a certain way and that's

• 50:14Brooke Averick?

  And that's that and that becomes the truth.

• 50:16Connor Wood?

  It's easier to accept that.

• 50:18Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 50:18Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 50:19Brooke Averick?

  I get it.

• 50:24Connor Wood?

  Say, so I keep having a recurring dream that my grandma is trying to kill me and chases me to her basement. And then when I'm running down the stairs, all I see is my mom sitting at a coffee table alive. By the way, she's dead. Dresses at Little Red Riding Hood. So like, what does that mean?

• 50:37Brooke Averick?

  Her grandma's trying to kill her?

• 50:39Connor Wood?

  Yeah, but her and her mom who's who's passed away in real life is there in her dream.

• 50:45Brooke Averick?

  Maybe her grandma killed her mom.

• 50:48Connor Wood?

  Okay, I wasn't gonna go there. I was just gonna say like, maybe instead of having a dream that your mom's waiting in a basement dressed like Little Red Riding Hood, like go to therapy and learn how to Lucy dream so that you're at the beach with your mom.

• 50:58Brooke Averick?

  Or you could say, hey, mom, what the hell is this? Next time you're in the Little Red Riding Hood.

• 51:03Connor Wood?

  Oh, that would also be

• 51:04Brooke Averick?

  Cause it seems like your grandma is the wolf. In the story.

• 51:08Connor Wood?

  Oh, my gosh, Brooke.

• 51:09Brooke Averick?

  Right?

• 51:10Connor Wood?

  Totally.

• 51:11Brooke Averick?

  So that means something.

• 51:14Connor Wood?

  And her mom is

• 51:15Brooke Averick?

  That's what I'm saying.

• 51:16Connor Wood?

  Oh, my God, your grandma ate your mom.

• 51:18Brooke Averick?

  That's what it seemed like. She believes that in some level. Or maybe that her grandma contributed to to whatever happened to her mom.

• 51:26Connor Wood?

  Wow.

• 51:27Brooke Averick?

  Watch that be like completely so off base.

• 51:31Connor Wood?

  Oh, my gosh. Well, maybe like distance yourself from your grandmother.

• 51:35Brooke Averick?

  If pause.

• 51:37Connor Wood?

  Or just look into it and and notice if her ears have gotten bigger. Or what what sharp teeth she has. You know?

• 51:46Brooke Averick?

  Have you seen like the actual origins of so many fairy tales that are actually like so disturbing?

• 51:52Connor Wood?

  I would love to do an episode on that.

• 51:56Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, like one of the stepsisters in Cinderella, like cutting her foot off to fit in the glass slipper.

• 52:00Connor Wood?

  I can't tell if those are done by people who are so unwell and they like want to see.

• 52:03Brooke Averick?

  No, Connor, that was the original.

• 52:06Connor Wood?

  Oh, and they made it sweet?

• 52:07Brooke Averick?

  And then they made it the Cinderella that we know.

• 52:11Connor Wood?

  Well, I'm happy they needed it.

• 52:12Brooke Averick?

  I think it was like the tails, or the, not the Brothers Grimm.

• 52:15Connor Wood?

  Yeah, no, it's Brothers Grimm.

• 52:16Brooke Averick?

  Is it?

• 52:17Connor Wood?

  Yeah. "Thanks a lot, Brothers Grimm," Ella Enchanted. Speaking of, someone wrote in and said, "Getting chased by a wolf, but I can't see. My vision is blurry, like I don't have my contacts in. It's terrifying."

• 52:30Brooke Averick?

  I have so many dreams where my, some sort of limb or body part malfunctions. I think that's the same as like the out of control, brakes don't work.

• 52:37Connor Wood?

  Yeah, probably.

• 52:38Brooke Averick?

  Type of thing.

• 52:39Connor Wood?

  I haven't had brakes don't work.

• 52:40Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 52:41Connor Wood?

  Oh, I can't find the one that the girl wrote in that I screenshotted. Wait, I'm gonna talk about this one first, the wolf. "Being chased by something is so scary. I always have the one where you can't move." Why is everyone having bad dreams? No one, not a single person wrote in and, and, and shared a nice recurring dream. I have one.

• 52:56Brooke Averick?

  Well, it's the same with like Yelp reviews. Like, you're gonna share the things that stick out the most, and those are usually like negative experiences.

• 53:04Connor Wood?

  We had a, we had far less sexual write-ins than I thought, which I was expecting a lot of people to be like, "I weirdly had this dream about someone I'm not attracted to, I wasn't attracted to, and then I had this sex dream and like everything changed mentally."

• 53:19Brooke Averick?

  I only ever have sex dreams about people that I'm not interested in.

• 53:22Connor Wood?

  Oh, did we have one?

• 53:23Brooke Averick?

  Mm-hmm.

• 53:24Connor Wood?

  Okay. Oh my god, I don't know if I wanna read that.

• 53:28Brooke Averick?

  Do it.

• 53:28Connor Wood?

  "I had a dream that my brother kept trying to kiss me in front of his girlfriend, and my boyfriend, my brother and his girlfriend were offended that I wouldn't kiss him. Thoughts?" I am, first of all, like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you did this. That is so foul.

• 53:44Brooke Averick?

  I don't think it's that bad.

• 53:46Connor Wood?

  That...

• 53:48Connor Wood?

  No, I'm glad.

• 53:48Brooke Averick?

  I'm thinking like a pack.

• 53:49Connor Wood?

  I'm glad that the outcome was like,

• 53:52Connor Wood?

  you didn't kiss him.

• 53:54Brooke Averick?

  But we don't know that.

• 53:56Connor Wood?

  No, that I didn't kiss him. Thoughts? Wouldn't.

• 54:00Brooke Averick?

  Maybe she budged.

• 54:01Connor Wood?

  She didn't say wouldn't at first.

• 54:04Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 54:04Connor Wood?

  I hope you didn't kiss him in your subconscious, but again, that's like not your fault. I'm not gonna, I'm not Freud, so I can't, like, do too much there. Freud would love this one, though. Oh my god, I wish.

• 54:15Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I don't know what that one means.

• 54:16Connor Wood?

  Wish Freud was our age.

• 54:19Brooke Averick?

  He probably was when he was at his peak, honestly.

• 54:22Connor Wood?

  He's a freak, like, I know that, but like, I would love to have him on and just like have him be like, "Yeah, you definitely wanna hook up with your brother."

• 54:28Brooke Averick?

  How old was Freud when he came up with his, like, "You wanna fuck your mom?" Oedipus complex theory?

• 54:35Connor Wood?

  He was 60, so that's really unfortunate to learn. Ew.

• 54:41Brooke Averick?

  Do you believe that?

• 54:43Connor Wood?

  What?

• 54:43Brooke Averick?

  That every, like, boy, like, wants to be with his, like, someone like his mom?

• 54:48Connor Wood?

  I do think that birds of a feather flock together. I do think that there's some science there and you are, you're like, you, you, I, I don't think it's inherently sexual. I think it's more like, "I want to build, like, a family base that's based on the success I saw or the failure I saw within my own family unit." But I don't think that it's sexual, although you do, I feel like instinctually you want-

• 55:12Brooke Averick?

  They're taking it that way.

• 55:13Connor Wood?

  Like, survival, you know? Of, like, your genes. So it's like, "I wanna fuck someone that, like, reminds me of my parents that had me."

• 55:22Brooke Averick?

  I guess.

• 55:23Connor Wood?

  Ew.

• 55:26Connor Wood?

  You need to shake this dream. You need to shake this dream. There's no reason a sibling should be in your dream in any way.

• 55:33Brooke Averick?

  I'm not sure why I'm, like, not disturbed by that one.

• 55:35Connor Wood?

  You're really close with your brother. I'm just kidding.

• 55:42Connor Wood?

  Oh, Lord.

• 55:44Connor Wood?

  I...

• 55:46Connor Wood?

  I don't know what to say about that. What is this one that, above it, I'm seeing the word minions. "A few months back, had a dream that they released a live-action Minions movie. In the movie, Connor was an influencer doing a livestream, teaching people how to speak minion." "Okay, manifestation, I do wanna be in film and TV."

• 56:01Brooke Averick?

  Would, do you wanna be in the Minions franchise?

• 56:04Connor Wood?

  Uh, that's a big-money franchise, like, sure.

• 56:05Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 56:06Connor Wood?

  And I feel like I could do voice acting.

• 56:09Brooke Averick?

  I agree, you've got a great voice.

• 56:10Connor Wood?

  I don't know how to do the minion thing, though. I've never seen a minion movie.

• 56:14Brooke Averick?

  Oh my God, they're actually really good.

• 56:15Connor Wood?

  Are they?

• 56:16Brooke Averick?

  I love the Minions music in the way that I love Alvin and the Chipmunks music.

• 56:21Connor Wood?

  Is it just really high-pitched and chatty?

• 56:24Brooke Averick?

  You've never heard a minion song? Izzy, can we play the banana? Banana, na, na, na, na. It don't matter. This is gonna knock your socks off.

• 56:54Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 56:55Brooke Averick?

  I could watch that on loop.

• 56:58Connor Wood?

  It's crazy that Brain Rot didn't start on TikTok. It started in 2013 with the Minions movies.

• 57:04Brooke Averick?

  Oh my god, this is awesome. I had forgotten about this piece. Do you know what is actually, actually, we can watch it. I'd love to watch this in the bonus.

• 57:13Connor Wood?

  What kind of Berts is that?

• 57:17Connor Wood?

  Why is it in a cardboard box?

• 57:19Brooke Averick?

  It's the cardboard box, Berts.

• 57:21Connor Wood?

  That's neat. I love that.

• 57:22Brooke Averick?

  And you push it up from the bottom. You have like many of them too.

• 57:26Connor Wood?

  Oh, I can't. I didn't get there yet. I'm still on my first little mini. Okay, I like this one.

• 57:34Connor Wood?

  Um, that this girl wrote in. Basically, she's saying like she, she's in like a barn.

• 57:39Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 57:39Connor Wood?

  And then all of a sudden, she enters a room in this barn and like, there's a unfinished boat, like a big wooden boat. And then she realizes like, oh my god, I'm not supposed to be in here. Like, this is someone else's thing and I need to get out of here. And I can't remember how it ended and I don't think I screenshotted it, but um, I have dreams all the time where I realize I'm in someone's house. And I like, don't even, like my intentions were pure. I don't know how I got into this person's house, but I need to get out of this house.

• 58:08Brooke Averick?

  I have that too, but it's my old house.

• 58:10Connor Wood?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 58:12Brooke Averick?

  And I'm like, oh wait, fuck, I forgot I don't live here anymore.

• 58:14Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 58:16Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 58:16Connor Wood?

  Um, and you have to get out, which is weird. It's like the getting out should be like, I came into this house on accident. I'm so sorry. Like, that should be easy. But they always want to kill me.

• 58:25Brooke Averick?

  Shit.

• 58:27Connor Wood?

  Have you ever had a dream that a family member is trying to kill you?

• 58:30Brooke Averick?

  I don't think so.

• 58:31Connor Wood?

  Not to go back to the grandma that wants to eat their grandma.

• 58:33Brooke Averick?

  I actually do not think so. But that's a good question. If I did have a dream that a family member was trying to kill me, who would it be?

• 58:42Connor Wood?

  Oh my god, I found the screenshot.

• 58:47Brooke Averick?

  Maybe my pop op. Because when I was little, he used to tell me that um, he wanted to marry me. And that would scare the shit out of me.

• 58:56Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that. Normal fear valid.

• 59:00Brooke Averick?

  Cause he said I was the love of his life. So. That would really scare me. And so I guess that I could see that transferring over to I want to kill you.

• 59:11Connor Wood?

  I could see that too.

• 59:14Brooke Averick?

  I do want to marry pop up though.

• 59:17Connor Wood?

  See, it's all in the family.

• 59:18Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 59:19Connor Wood?

  Freud is on to something.

• 59:21Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 59:21Connor Wood?

  Um, okay, here's one. I feel like you'll like this one. I always have this dream when I'm stressed out. I'm a theater kid. I'm usually in the audience watching a high school production I've never seen, then a strange. Oh, stagehand asked me to fill in for the main character. I'm quickly brought backstage and begging for a script while getting hair and makeup done. Then someone will finally give me a script where each page is the size of a fortune cookie paper. I wake up sweating.

• 59:45Brooke Averick?

  Whoa.

• 59:47Connor Wood?

  I have that all the time.

• 59:47Brooke Averick?

  Fortune cookie paper is a nice touch.

• 59:49Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that is nice.

• 59:50Brooke Averick?

  I've had the like, where's the script before? And I just never get it.

• 59:56Connor Wood?

  I have had um.

• 1:00:00Connor Wood?

  One recently where it's like, oh, I feel so good. Cause I've been telling you guys like the stand up's been going well and I feel comfortable. And like, I don't really even feel the need to like, go over stuff like that much anymore. Whereas I the. I used to be like the full day before I'm like in my hotel room, like going over stuff. And now I'm like, no, I feel good and I'm going to do crowd work and I'm going to talk to people and whatever. But now my dreams have become, oh, I haven't prepared at all. And then I go out. And this was at my college at UT Austin. They're like, all right, you're up. And it's like. Very famous people and then me, like I finally got like Glenn Powell, Matthew McConaughey, and then me. And then I go out and I haven't prepared anything. And I can't remember if I told this story on here before, but I went out.

• 1:00:42Connor Wood?

  And I go, "The square root of sixty-nine is eight something, right?" Because I've been trying to work it out. And then I drop the mic and I walk offstage. And it was silent. And then everyone started laughing and clapping. And I was like, "I just absolutely killed that."

• 1:00:59Brooke Averick?

  Reinvented the wheel, almost.

• 1:01:01Connor Wood?

  But then I came downstage and like, all of the uppers were so mad at me. Because they were like, "You didn't prepare anything. You didn't do anything that wasn't even a joke." That's literally a lyric from "Oh, na, na, what's my name?" by Rihanna and Drake.

• 1:01:16Brooke Averick?

  Oh, I thought it was switching positions for you.

• 1:01:19Connor Wood?

  No, no, no. "The square root of sixty-nine is eight something, right? Because I've been trying to work it out." Ah, weed, white wine, yeah. I come alive in the night time, yeah. Okay, where we go? Only thing we have on in the radio. Let it play, say you got a roommate.

• 1:01:40Connor Wood?

  So, a song I haven't heard in nine years.

• 1:01:43Brooke Averick?

  At least you have all of the lyrics memorized. Thank God.

• 1:01:46Connor Wood?

  The things that we could do in twenty minutes. Girl, say my name, say my name. Way it out. Getting hot, crack a window, air it out.

• 1:01:53Brooke Averick?

  I'll be on my deathbed and I'll be able to rap, uh, the rapper from Down.

• 1:02:00Connor Wood?

  Should we do it?

• 1:02:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. Down like she's supposed to be. Nope.

• 1:02:06Connor Wood?

  Oh, yeah. All right, ready?

• 1:02:09Brooke Averick?

  Down like she's supposed to be. She gets down all over me. Down like her temperature, because to me she's zero degrees. She cold like over freeze. I got that girl from overseas. Now she's my Miss America. Ooh. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Maybe this is the overseas attack that you've been thinking about.

• 1:02:30Connor Wood?

  Sweating. What does it mean, "You got that girl from overseas"?

• 1:02:31Brooke Averick?

  I don't, whatever it means, it's not good.

• 1:02:33Connor Wood?

  What do you mean by that? We'll move right along.

• 1:02:35Brooke Averick?

  Okay. Dancing through life. Wow, everyone's probably seen Wicked by now.

• 1:02:42Connor Wood?

  I'm seeing it Friday, for sure.

• 1:02:44Brooke Averick?

  I'm so excited.

• 1:02:45Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:45Brooke Averick?

  I wonder if you'll like, like it.

• 1:02:46Connor Wood?

  I need to show you my hotel.

• 1:02:48Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 1:02:50Connor Wood?

  I'll show you in the bonus. It's brilliant.

• 1:02:53Brooke Averick?

  Bloody brilliant?

• 1:02:54Connor Wood?

  It's brilliant. I have a balcony that I'm gonna-

• 1:02:57Brooke Averick?

  Ron's been splinched.

• 1:03:01Brooke Averick?

  Oh my god, that is like a perfect segue.

• 1:03:02Connor Wood?

  DeSantis?

• 1:03:03Brooke Averick?

  That's a perfect segue to all the British food that Izzy brought us.

• 1:03:06Connor Wood?

  Oh yeah.

• 1:03:08Brooke Averick?

  That we'll try in the bone.

• 1:03:09Connor Wood?

  Ooh, in the boner zoner, we're gonna be trying British food, you guys. And I mean, I'm looking forward to the beans.

• 1:03:13Brooke Averick?

  I'm looking forward to the chips.

• 1:03:14Connor Wood?

  I heart beans.

• 1:03:17Brooke Averick?

  You so do.

• 1:03:18Connor Wood?

  I love beans.

• 1:03:20Brooke Averick?

  And you know I don't like beans. Baked beans are okay.

• 1:03:24Connor Wood?

  That's just beans with like a pound of sugar, by the way.

• 1:03:27Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I think that's why I like it.

• 1:03:28Connor Wood?

  It's baked beans are literally like beans from via legume and then...

• 1:03:35Brooke Averick?

  Hola legume.

• 1:03:36Connor Wood?

  Hola papa. So beans. Beans should be the baby of Papa y legume.

• 1:03:43Brooke Averick?

  Oh, bebe beans.

• 1:03:44Connor Wood?

  Wait, beca- bebe beans.

• 1:03:47Brooke Averick?

  Bebe beans. Bonjour bebe.

• 1:03:49Connor Wood?

  Bonjour mama.

• 1:03:51Brooke Averick?

  Como se va?

• 1:03:52Connor Wood?

  I need iced tea. I need my water and juice.

• 1:04:01Connor Wood?

  Baby's penis itchy.

• 1:04:03Brooke Averick?

  Baby, what?

• 1:04:04Connor Wood?

  Itchy. How many have been in drill? Baby penis been in drill.

• 1:04:10Brooke Averick?

  Whoa, I just got scared that this was a dream.

• 1:04:13Connor Wood?

  That happens to me all the time when I have two espressos on an empty stomach.

• 1:04:17Brooke Averick?

  That was weird. Something about you doing what you just did made me think this can't be real.

• 1:04:24Connor Wood?

  I mean, it's not. Nothing's real. Did you see the movie Inception?

• 1:04:27Brooke Averick?

  No, but it was all a dream.

• 1:04:31Connor Wood?

  Or was it? Literally, that's the point of the movie.

• 1:04:32Brooke Averick?

  Don't tell me, I wanna see it.

• 1:04:33Connor Wood?

  No, you don't.

• 1:04:35Brooke Averick?

  La la.

• 1:04:36Connor Wood?

  You don't know.

• 1:04:36Brooke Averick?

  Have you seen Shutter Island?

• 1:04:37Connor Wood?

  There's no closure, no.

• 1:04:39Brooke Averick?

  Great twist.

• 1:04:40Connor Wood?

  I'll watch Inception if you, I'll watch Shutter.

• 1:04:42Brooke Averick?

  I told you, I wanna watch Inception.

• 1:04:43Connor Wood?

  Oh, you should watch it. It's literally a brilliant movie with a brilliant cast and the production value is amazing. And then also it makes you wanna go to Europe.

• 1:04:50Brooke Averick?

  Awesome.

• 1:04:51Connor Wood?

  Mm-hmm, yep.

• 1:04:54Brooke Averick?

  Uh, mama has to pee so, so, so bad.

• 1:04:57Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 1:04:58Brooke Averick?

  So, and it is time to go, so I do want to bid you adieu.

• 1:05:01Connor Wood?

  Well, I bid you adieu, mama.

• 1:05:03Brooke Averick?

  Adieu, legum.

• 1:05:05Connor Wood?

  Bye, baby.

• 1:05:06Speaker 07

  Bye.

• 1:05:08Brooke Averick?

  This week on Close Friends. Sprinkle cut Irish potato chips.

• 1:05:13Connor Wood?

  Oh, my gosh, you're blowing my freaking mind right now.

• 1:05:16Brooke Averick?

  Eileen, Eileen, Eileen. Aw, man, I got Marmalade on my panties.

• 1:05:22Connor Wood?

  Who pooped on the front of me?

• 1:05:24Brooke Averick?

  Okay, someone pooped on my front.

• 1:05:26Connor Wood?

  For me and my hum, we will express our anal glands.

• 1:05:29Brooke Averick?

  I just feel like you're not understanding.

• 1:05:31Connor Wood?

  No, I hear you. Sign up on T M G studios dot TV to watch a full bonus episode.

• 1:05:44Speaker 01

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• 1:06:14Speaker 04

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• 1:06:44Speaker 05

  Ugh, I hate Mondays.

• 1:06:45Speaker 06

  King's Hawaiian cinnamon swirl bite?

• 1:06:47Speaker 05

  Uh, Taylor Hanson? Sure, I'll try one.

• 1:06:50Speaker 06

  Mmm.

• 1:06:53Speaker 06

  Hey, let's get back to work, please.

• 1:06:54Speaker 05

  But Taylor Hanson's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites.

• 1:06:59Speaker 06

  Taylor Hanson? Nice. Try one. Mmm.

• 1:07:06Brooke Averick?

  King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites. There's nothing like it.