How To UNLOCK Your Ultimate Potential | Ed Mylett

How to Unlock the Ultimate Version of YOU In this mashup episode, I’m bringing together four incredible stories that reveal what it truly takes to break through fear, doubt, and pain and step into your ultimate potential. Lewis Howes, Jamie Kern Lima, Damon West, and Rod Carew each share deeply personal moments that will challenge the way you think about yourself, your past, and what’s really possible for your future. If you’ve ever felt like your mistakes disqualified you from greatness or your fear kept you playing small, this episode will show you the truth: you were made to do something extraordinary with your life. Lewis Howes opens up about one of the most powerful lessons I’ve ever heard on self-worth. He breaks down how the fear of judgment, not failure, is what holds most people back, and how learning to love and accept yourself is the real path to success. His vulnerability is a masterclass in healing and belief. Then, Jamie Kern Lima takes us straight into the heart of courage. You’ll hear how fear shaped her early life, how she faced it head-on, and how she built IT Cosmetics by choosing faith over fear... over and over again. Her reminder that fear is a liar will light a fire in you to stop letting worry and doubt rob your destiny. Damon West delivers one of the most powerful spiritual lessons I’ve ever heard. After surviving prison and addiction, he shares how surrender, not control, is the key to freedom. His story about learning the “Serenity Line” is a life-changer. You’ll hear what happens when you let go of what’s not yours to carry and start focusing only on what you can control: your thoughts, your words, your emotions, and your actions. And baseball legend Rod Carew reminds us that mental toughness and gratitude aren’t just keys to performance, they’re the foundation of purpose. From handling slumps on the field to losing his beloved daughter Michelle, Rod’s story is a breathtaking example of turning pain into purpose and keeping a promise that continues to save lives. Every one of these conversations reveals the truth that’s been the heartbeat of my entire life: your past doesn’t disqualify you... it prepares you. The very things you think make you “less than” are what qualify you to impact others. When you embrace your imperfections, face your fears, and surrender control, you start unlocking the ultimate version of you. Key Takeaways: The #1 fear that stops most people isn’t failure—it’s judgment (Lewis Howes). Why fear is a liar and faith is the antidote (Jamie Kern Lima). How to surrender control and find peace through the “Serenity Line” (Damon West). The secret to mental toughness and finding purpose through pain (Rod Carew). Why your past qualifies you, not disqualifies you, for greatness. How to step outside the lines, embrace your imperfections, and start living fully alive. You were born to do something great with your life. The potential is already inside you. It’s time to unlock it. Also don’t miss out on MAXOUT2026: Once a year, I open my home for an intimate one-day experience unlike anything else I do. This year, I’m making it even smaller, just 12 to 15 people. Together, we’ll dive deep into the exact strategies I use to plan, visualize, and design the best year of my life and yours. If you’re ready to Max Out your future, join me at ⁠⁠Maxout2026.com⁠⁠ for a life-changing day you’ll never forget. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠👉 SUBSCRIBE TO ED'S YOUTUBE CHANNEL NOW 👈⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ → → → CONNECT WITH ED MYLETT ON SOCIAL MEDIA: ← ← ← ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠INSTAGRAM⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ➡️⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠FACEBOOK⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LINKEDIN⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠X ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ➡️ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WEBSITE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Ed Mylett?

  I hear so many small business owners say the exact same thing. They just never have enough time in the day. Well, I measure time differently. I've compressed, condensed, heck, I've bent time. My first day is 6:00 AM to noon. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6:00 PM. And my third day, 6:00 PM to midnight. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, over a year, over five years. And my life's completely different than it would have been otherwise. And if you want to win as an entrepreneur, you have to compress your time too. And you definitely can't afford to waste it. Waiting weeks on a big bank for capital? Your best bet's to work with my friends at Cardiff. They know how to compress time for entrepreneurs. They get your business approved in minutes and funded the very same day. They're America's favorite small business lender and for good reason.

• 0:45Ed Mylett?

  Over 20 years in business, over 12 billion deployed to small business across America. Stop letting bank delays slow down your momentum. Head to cardiff.co/ed. That's cardiff.co/ed. Cardiff.co. Real growth, fast funding. Cardiff, borrow better. Hey guys, it's Ed. I rarely do this. As you know, 99.9% of my content is free. But once a year, I do something where I gather a very small group of people in my house. I've done it for two years in a row now. And I'm going to do it again this year. I'm going to do an experience in my home where I'm going to take you through how to make 2026 the best year of your life. All of the tactics and strategies that I use to plan and organize my own life in detail. Same time, all of the mental rehearsal and visualization techniques

• 1:28Ed Mylett?

  that people pay me hundreds of millions of dollars a year to teach them. I just wanted to tell you, this day is not something that I take very lightly. One thing you should know, full disclosure, is once this is sold out, I'm not adding extra days. And so last year, this sold out within about 24 hours. This year, I'm keeping the groups to 12, maybe 15 people. And so if you're inclined to spend the day with me, I would encourage you to take action now because truly this will be sold out probably within 24 to 48 hours. Click the link below and you can get rolling to spend a day with me in my home.

• 2:00Ed Mylett?

  This is the Ed Mylett Show.

• 2:04Ed Mylett?

  Hey, everyone. Welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Welcome back to the show, everybody. I am so excited about today's topic. I've wanted to record this episode for about a week now. I'm finally getting a chance in the studio to do it with you. What we're going to talk about today is actually, what do you need to do to fulfill your dreams and your potential? And I want to start out by saying something to you. You're going to have to decide in your life that you're going to be different, that you're not going to be like everybody else, that you're not going to be a part of the crowd. Everything in our culture today is trying to make us all the same, put us all in the same box, take what I call the crowded road of life as opposed to the lonely

• 2:46Ed Mylett?

  road of life, the road less traveled. And I've done a show on that before, and people asked me if I would go deeper on it, so I will today. And so today, we're going to talk a lot about the mindset that's required to do something great. And the first decision is to accept the fact that you're going to be different. You're going to be criticized. You're going to have haters. But not only that, you're going to feel very alone oftentimes on the journey. And you're not going to feel like a lot of people understand you. And it's making a decision upfront that I'm okay with not being like everyone else. I'm okay with not being part of the pack, that I want to be different. I want to stand out. You know, it's a difficult decision to do that, especially when maybe you don't have the confidence yet to do it. But at the end of your life, you're going to regret the fact

• 3:31Ed Mylett?

  that you didn't go for it, that you didn't try to do something different and unique and follow your heart, follow your own path. If you're a person of faith, we know that each of us was made individually in God's image and likeness, whatever your faith might be. And that there's an individual plan for our life. And so if there's an individual plan, an individual destiny for our lives, why would we try to take pages out of everybody else's book? Let me say something to you upfront, okay? Conformity to me is the ultimate form of cowardice. Let me say it again. Conformity is the ultimate form of cowardice. Meaning, when you just decide to conform to what everybody else expects of you,

• 4:13Ed Mylett?

  what everybody else is doing, or what they think you are, what they think you should be doing, or their limiting beliefs about you, their small minds. See, small-minded people, God bless them, will constantly try to project their smallness onto you to get you to shrink. And then what happens is, most people end up being a coward in life. It's what it really is, where they just begin to conform. "I'm gonna do and say what you think I should do and say. I'm not gonna speak my mind. I'm not gonna stand up for what I believe in. I'm not gonna try something outside of the box because I might fail and then you'll criticize me." And even when I'm trying, you'll probably criticize me. And even if I win and succeed, you're probably gonna criticize me.

• 4:56Ed Mylett?

  You ought to just decide right now and understand something, okay? Let me say this to you. You're gonna get criticized the whole time. You're gonna get criticized when you try. You're gonna get criticized if you fail. And believe it or not, you're gonna get criticized when you win. Because what people that are losing in their life do is they criticize people. And the reason they're critical of other people is it's the only time in their life that they feel like they have any power or any value, that they're even noticed. So because they're in a pack and they've conformed and they're on the crowded road, they don't ever stand out. They don't ever get noticed. And so, if you're never gonna do that and you're being a coward, which is to be like everybody else, well, what's the one way out of that cowardice?

• 5:37Ed Mylett?

  Is to be a bully, is to be a critic, is to sit on the sidelines and poke fun, or tell people how they ought to do it better when they're not doing anything. And you've just gotta decide in your life, I know I'm being a little bit more intense than normal today, you gotta decide in your life that you don't wanna take advice from these people. You don't wanna think like these people. And by the way, many of them are really great people, just at one time, they just decided, "You know what? I'm just gonna color between the lines in my life. I'm just gonna color right in between the lines like everybody else," which I'm gonna talk about in a minute. And so, what ends up happening, Gandhi has this great quote that I've been really working on lately. Gandhi said, "I will not let you walk through my mind with your dirty feet." And too many of you are letting the people around you walk through your mind with their

• 6:21Ed Mylett?

  dirty feet. And it's polluting your brain, it's polluting your thoughts, it's creating negative belief systems, limiting belief systems. And you know what? Your own confidence, your own strength, your own self-esteem is going to come from you. You have to understand something. When you try something in your life, okay? Or you attempt anything in your life, you're either going to become wise, or you're going to become wounded. And too many people, once they start to try, become wounded. The failure wounds them, the setback wounds them, the criticism wounds them. Their own, by the way, sometimes the people walking through your mind with their dirty feet are you. And your own thoughts, and by the way, the reason I know this is I very much have done

• 7:06Ed Mylett?

  this myself. The guy walking through my mind most of the time with his dirty feet is this dude right here. And I've learned something. I don't have to believe everything I think. In fact, I don't anymore. Most of the stuff I think, all the studies say, I've said this in another podcast, 80 to 90% of our thoughts are negative. These aren't my thoughts, those aren't God's thoughts. Those are somehow very, very wounded man's thinking, not a wise man. And I'll ask myself that when I have these thoughts. Is this a wise man's thoughts or a wounded man's thoughts? You ask yourself that. These negative thoughts that you're having, these limiting thoughts that you're having, is that the wise woman's thoughts or the wounded woman's thoughts? And if it's the wounded woman, stop listening to her and start talking to her.

• 7:48Ed Mylett?

  Sometimes in life, you gotta stop listening to yourself so much and start talking to yourself. And it's all your responsibility. Listen, it's not called friend esteem, or stranger esteem, or mom and dad esteem, it's called self-esteem for a reason, because you have to be the one to believe it. And listen to me. The fact that you're listening to my podcast or watching it means this, you're starting to grow. And maybe you've been growing for quite a while. And by the way, if you're outgrowing people, it makes them very uncomfortable with themselves. And then because they're uncomfortable with themselves, they become dream stealers. Because here's what happens, you getting bigger makes them feel smaller. And so the consequence, what a lot of us do is we decide to shrink ourselves and get smaller.

• 8:32Ed Mylett?

  So that they can feel bigger or safer with us around. Let me say that to you again. You getting bigger makes them feel smaller. And because you're a good person, whether it's your boyfriend or girlfriend, your spouse, your friends, your parents, whoever it is. What you do, because you're a good person, is instead of still getting bigger. You decide you will get smaller so they can feel bigger or safer with you. And what ends up happening is you shrink your dreams. And we shrink our lives, we shrink our energy, we shrink our capacity to fit in.

• 9:05Ed Mylett?

  And we make all these other people around us comfortable. And what I want you to do is, I want you to make some people uncomfortable in your life. There's nothing wrong with making people feel uncomfortable. And if you're gonna do it, see, to me, that's courage. Courage is being willing to make other people uncomfortable. Remember this, sometimes I had to say this to my family, pardon my progress. But I'm gonna be making progress over here, right? And eventually, they might get on board and they might not get on board. But I want to know that at the end of my life, when it's over. That I've given it everything I've got. That I didn't shrink myself because I was a coward. I didn't shrink myself to please small-minded people around me.

• 9:48Ed Mylett?

  That my capacity to grow, my capacity to read, my total commitment to a personal development program. My total commitment to a self-improvement program. I started out as a very young man in my early twenties. With absolutely no self-esteem, no confidence, no communication ability whatsoever. And I started the journey of self-discovery, self-improvement, and personal development. I started out as a terrible reader. But I found myself, at least I could read a book a month, and then it got to a book a week. And I got up to where I was reading sometimes 50, 60, 70, 80 books a year. And these were like mentors to me. When I read books, it's like this author is personally speaking to me and mentoring me, pouring into me.

• 10:29Ed Mylett?

  Man, if there was a podcast like mine back then, my gosh, I'd be glued, I mean, I would be glued to it. I don't mean to brag, but like, I would be glued to it. There's this great Chinese proverb that says, if you want to know the road ahead, ask those coming back. And to be able to listen to my Thursday episodes, or the people I interview on Tuesdays, these are people who have the directions because they're coming back. I think I have some of them. But I know this, when I started out, because I didn't have a lot of confidence, man, every once in a while, the cowardly me would come back in. I would shrink my life, shrink my dreams, shrink my belief. Right? Those voices were, that those dirty feet were running through my mind. And then a few other people had their dirty feet doing it to me as well. And between the rest of us, between them and me, it was like a stampede in my mind all the time.

• 11:12Ed Mylett?

  And I didn't want to make people uncomfortable. I still, to this day, at 53 years old, I'm a people pleaser. I don't like to offend. I don't like to hurt people. I, if I have strife with somebody in my life, like I can't sleep until I fixed it. I'm just wired that way. Many of you are. But I've learned that if I've made a mistake in how I've treated somebody or spoken to them, then it should bother me and I should fix it. But if the mistake I've made is trying to do something great with my life, the mistake I've made is trying to change my family tree forever, the mistake I've made is trying to be happier and grow, if the mistake I've made is trying to give to other people and contribute and create great memories in my life, then guess what?

• 11:53Ed Mylett?

  That's not a mistake, and I'm not apologizing for that. I've got one life, you've got one life, and it's time we have the courage to get after it and take the lonely road and not have this cowardice, this cowardly way about us where we just conform to what everybody else is doing. And I can tell you, I think I know where it comes from. I think it comes, believe it or not, all the way back when we were little, little kids in our coloring books. Remember how much we were trained over and over again to color between the lines? And I was always a terrible color. I'm left-handed, I just, I've got no coordination skills this way. You go look at my old coloring book, they're just terrible. But we're trained as children, "Color between the lines, Sarah. Color between the lines, Bob. Color between the lines. Stay between the lines."

• 12:38Ed Mylett?

  And we're over and over and over, this is reinforced to us, to stay between the lines. And there's a lot of great things about school, but coloring between the lines, sitting in the same way, fold your hand, all these things. What ends up happening is we begin to get older, we literally start to only color between the lines in our life. We don't want to get outside the lines. And I'm going to say something to you. All great people color outside the lines. All the people you admire, what do you admire about them? They colored outside the lines in their life. They didn't stay a conformist. They didn't stay with some predetermined picture. See, here's what a coloring book is. Here's the picture. Now you just fill in the one I gave you.

• 13:21Ed Mylett?

  Color between the lines. And that's what most people do in their life. The world hands them, "Here's your picture. This is what you get. This is your life. This is the one you're handed. Stay between the lines. Don't you veer outside those lines. Don't you get outside of there." And what happens is that we have this thing that's now wired into us once we're adults. "Oh, my gosh, I'm outside the lines. I better get back. I'm outside the lines, I better get back." And it becomes something in life where I've never been out here before. I need to come back. I'm misbehaving. I'm going to get in trouble. I'm not doing what I was trained to do. This isn't what I do. And I can tell you, that's why there's so few people in life that win. But I can tell you the decision they've made. They've made the decision that they're not coloring within the lines anymore.

• 14:03Ed Mylett?

  And so my challenge to you today is to have courage, is not to conform, but to create. Is to decide in your life that you're not playing within these lines somebody else handed to you. That you're going to design your own life with God, your own story, your own pictures. And that you're going to pick up a new pen, a new crayon. You're going to start coloring a- Whole new picture of your life. And when you begin to do that, it's going to be uncomfortable at first. And by the way, some of you have said, Ed, I've done it. And you know what? Now that I'm listening to say, I'm back between the dang lines again. I was outside. I had some failures and setbacks and I ran back within the picture they gave me. You've got to stop this tendency of running back within the picture that everybody gave you. Shrinking your dreams down, shrinking your life down to fit between these lines.

• 14:46Ed Mylett?

  Some artificial lines that everybody, some strange, a random person, I guess, gave you.

• 14:52Ed Mylett?

  But I can tell you this. I don't believe you were created to stay within those lines. I don't think you yet have any idea what your potential is and your capacity. But what I can tell you is you begin to expand your capacity and you start really getting out there. You'll be surprised how far you can go. I, the people that I know that are successful, myself included, if you think I am. For me to look back now, how far I've come, my gosh, it's amazing. You'd have told me all these different things would happen. It blows my mind. But the reason that that happened is I finally started building the habit of I'm not shrinking to make you comfortable. And by the way, I'm not going to shrink to make me comfortable. I've got incredibly comfortable at being uncomfortable.

• 15:34Ed Mylett?

  In fact, this is probably not great to admit, but when I go too long, just kind of laying around being comfortable. I start to get uncomfortable. I start to get uncomfortable not doing difficult things. People ask me all the time, why do you do cold plunges in the morning? Is it the anti-inflammatory properties? Is it, I don't know. No, not really. In fact, there's some data that says the longer you do it, the less that has an impact. I don't even know if that's right. But that's why I do it anyway. The reason that I do it is it's hard. The reason I do it is it's difficult. Successful people, happy people, do difficult things. Unhappy people, and I believe unsuccessful people, have a tendency to not do difficult things.

• 16:19Ed Mylett?

  There's this great story I, my firm at one time, we sponsored Carl Edwards. He was a NASCAR driver, very successful one for a long time. And I asked him about driving a NASCAR. And I'll never forget what he told me. I said, what's the hardest part? And he goes, well, there's obviously the physical toll that it takes on you, Ed. And, and obviously the mechanics of knowing how to drive the car correctly and all those things that I don't understand of being a top athlete in any sport.

• 16:45Ed Mylett?

  But he said the most difficult part is when you're driving and there's a crash in front of you and you're doing 150 miles an hour and all you can see is a smoke cloud. All you can see is a smoke cloud. And he said, and what you gotta do is drive right through that cloud. You gotta drive right through it. And he goes, and it's scary because you don't know what's on the other side. You could be going headlong into a car that's already crashed at 150, 180 miles an hour, bam, and you don't know. And you gotta drive through the smoke anyway. I never thought about that before. He goes, oh yeah, I mean, there's a wreck in front of you and there's ever the smokes everywhere. He goes, you just gotta drive right through it. And he said, the other thing is when there's an accident, he goes, you know, you're up against the wall and you're driving. He goes, your tendency when you're driving, you got you're doing 150 or 180 or whatever they do, the

• 17:29Ed Mylett?

  wall's a millimeter away. He goes, you can't look at the wall. Cause when you look at it, you drive right into it. You end up gravitating right into it. He said, you gotta keep looking ahead, Ed. You can't flinch when there's an accident in front of you. You can't flinch where there's smoke and you can't see what's on the other side. You gotta drive right through it. And I remember it firing me up thinking, man, that's life. Man, that's success. Sometimes you can't see where you're going. You gotta drive right through it, not knowing what's on the other side. And have the faith and the confidence that when you get to the other side, you will figure it out, that there'll be a blessing and a gift that you'll be protected. And that's what I mean by the conformity is cowardice, right? It takes courage to go through that smoke cloud. And then you gotta keep your eye on the prize. When you're

• 18:11Ed Mylett?

  driving 150, 180 miles an hour, an inch away from the wall, don't look at the wall. Don't look at the wall. Look ahead where you're going. And so many of us in life, even once we get it going, we start looking at the wall. I know I'm gonna crash. I know I'm gonna crash. It's so close. And we start looking at the things we don't want and we manifest them. We literally, I believe thoughts are magnets. And what you think about most regularly, you attract to yourself. I believe that. I believe it, especially if you do it repetitively, especially if I can be candid with you, and I may sound outside the lines for you, but let me just say this. I love being outside the lines. The more you begin to become successful and vibrate at a high frequency, the more you really need to protect your thoughts. Because when you're vibrating the highest frequency,

• 18:52Ed Mylett?

  you tend to draw things to you even more rapidly and more regularly. When you're at that frequency, okay? And so it's important that you not look at the wall in your life. That wall is an artificial line in the coloring book of your life. And when you begin to look at it, you decide to conform or hit it. But when you look ahead at where you're going, when you're focused in the present moment. See, I could tell you this. The other reason I love to cold plunge is it's so dad gum cold. It forces me to be fully present in that moment. You get into a cold plunge, you can't be worrying about your problems in that moment. You are fully focused and getting through those three to five minutes, or however long you sit in there. For some of us that are crazy people, it's some of the few minutes every day we are fully present, right?

• 19:36Ed Mylett?

  And I can promise you, if you're doing 150 or 180 into a smoke cloud, you're not worried about your grocery list at that time. You're going right in there fully present in the moment. And it's the most alive you ever feel in your life. See, total focus, you'll feel the most alive in your life. If you look back at your life, some of the most chaotic, busy, difficult times were your happiest. And you may not have realized it at the time, but when you're in college cramming for finals, and I ask you to go back to those days, all the stress, you had a job and you're going through college, let's say if you had that. Some of the happiest times in your life. Some of you mamas, those days where your eight month, your pregnancy and your... It's one of the difficult times in your life, yet one of the most blessed times in our life. See, when it's really busy and we feel the most out of control

• 20:21Ed Mylett?

  and we're driving through that smoke cloud, we're coloring outside those lines when we're the happiest. And when it's easy and cruise control and we're just kind of shrinking our life down to conform like everybody else, it's when we're the most miserable. That's why there's this thing that's inside of you right now saying, I'm supposed to be somebody. I'm supposed to do something great with my life. I'm not exactly settled where I am right now. You're not settled right now. You don't feel settled in your spirit. You don't feel settled in your spirit because you know there's more abundant faith for you. You know there's more people to help. You know there's a dream and a life waiting for you out there, even if you're in a great one right now. You've got this sense about you that there's another place for you to go. There's more people for you to help. There's more people for you to serve. If you're a believer that you want to serve God's kingdom

• 21:06Ed Mylett?

  in the biggest possible way you can. Whatever that thing is for you, and I can tell you, I know where that lies, and that lies outside the lines. And so today, I hope you decide that you, or no one else, is ever going to walk through your mind with their dirty feet, and that you've decided that you're not going to conform, and that you're going to do something awesome with your life. I'm giving you full permission. In fact, I'm begging you, color outside the lines, because that's where all the people that you want to help are waiting for you. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Today's talk is not about me. I'm gonna talk very little about me. I'm gonna talk

• 21:48Ed Mylett?

  about you. I want you to max out your life. I want you to max out your business, and I want to help you do that. See, when you were born, let me ask you a question. The doctor slapped you on the ass. Make sure you're okay, didn't he, right? Then he sat you probably on your mama's chest or put you in the nursery. I doubt when he handed me, mom, he goes, hey, here's one of the average ones. Mediocre kid you got there. Congratulations. See, you were made to do something great with your life, weren't you? And you've always known it. There's always been this little voice in your head, since you were a little boy or a little girl, you've always known there was something special about you. Those of us that have faith in the room, we know we were made as a masterpiece. We know the Lord looks like us, looks at us like we can do anything with our lives through him, don't

• 22:33Ed Mylett?

  we? Is that right? You weren't born to be average. You weren't born to have a mediocre existence on this earth. You were born to do something great, and that's why you're in this room. It's by no mistake that you've always had those thoughts, that intuition, that aspiration, and you find yourself in this room at this time today. So if this is the worst talk you ever heard, you heard from Ted Mylett. But if it's the best talk you ever heard, give Ed Mylett a little credit. Is that fair? Yes? And so, do you feel the energy in here, by the way? Because see, the difference between maxing out, 10x in your life, has a lot to do with energy. There's a winning energy, right? People respond to what they feel more than what they hear.

• 23:16Ed Mylett?

  In fact, as I'm speaking right now, you already feel different the first three minutes of this, don't you? And the reason is, you can feel that I mean what I'm saying. You can feel the transfer of energy. Let me ask you a question. What do you make people feel? And the more you become conscious of what you're making people feel, not what you say, not their opinion of you, but what they feel when they're around you, is gonna make all the difference in the world of whether or not you're going to influence them to change their lives or participate with you in business, your company, etc. Do you hear me on that? Say yes. Because the day he slapped you on that ass, a race started. Listen to me. A race began. And it's a race that started that first day when you were born,

• 24:00Ed Mylett?

  to the last day of your life. And that race is to finally reach the ultimate version of you. You're chasing down the person you were born to be, that you were destined to be. And since that day started, the world, the people around you, are trying to get you to conform to average. They're trying to get you off that track to finally meet your twin someday, the best possible version of you. Every single day has to be a pursuit to get better, to improve, to grow, to stretch, because you are ultimately chasing the destiny version of you. Do you hear me on that? Say yes. So every decision you make in business, every call you have, whether you go to the gym or not, you need to put it through this paradigm, through this barometer.

• 24:44Ed Mylett?

  Does this decision, does this relationship I'm in, does this choice I'm making right now, put me closer to becoming that man or woman, or further away? Listen, you gotta get a little bit more intense about your life, about your business. You gotta stop being so dad gum casual. You gotta get in the game. If you're gonna play the game, let's play to win it. Let's play to max it out. Let's play to 10x it. Right or wrong? Right? I want you shaking, I want you feeling it, I want your intensity level to go up. Not in this room, but when you leave this room, you're focused on more energy, more intensity, more focus, because these people you see speaking here, they're not smarter than you.

• 25:26Ed Mylett?

  We're not better than you. I don't like when we get up here, "I'm rich, I'm rich." You know what? Who cares if I'm rich? I care whether you're rich. I want you to live richly. And I can tell you, I don't like it sometimes when we come to events like this, because you always see the after. If this was a weight loss ad, we're all ripped up here. The power of the weight loss ad is you see the fat lady, then she's the skinny lady, right? You don't see the before, you're only seeing afters here. The before with me is an introverted, shy guy, insecure guy, low self-esteem, afraid of public speaking. That's the before me, a broke me. And I'm not getting into the details of that, but I want that to give you hope, because it's decisions we make that chase that best version of us every second,

• 26:11Ed Mylett?

  every day, that every day alters the direction of the course of our lives. We've all made decisions that we regret. That decision took me off course. That decision put me further away of being the best life I could have, the best version of me. When you were a little girl, or a little boy, there was somebody who knew you were special. It was your grandma, your uncle, a coach, a teacher. There's been one person in your life, hasn't there? They're the one who knew you were special. There's always one. If you're blessed in life, you may have two or three of those people. Just picture their face for a second. Who was that person, that when you were a little girl or a little boy, they just looked at you a little different? They just knew you were special. They knew you were great. They knew you could do something great with your life. See, I think the key to being great in business is being that person in other people's lives. I don't believe in faking

• 26:55Ed Mylett?

  it till you make it. And you can listen to all my podcasts and know how broke I went. But I'm gonna prove to you how crazy entrepreneurs are, because you know what entrepreneurism is, right? It's the greatest self-discovery process in the history of mankind. You learn more about yourself, what you don't know, your resiliency, how tough you are, what your weaknesses are by being an entrepreneur. It's probably the greatest self-discovery program in the history of the world. It's also this, it's the greatest self-improvement program with the highest compensation package possibly attached to it too. Entrepreneurism is a self-improvement program with massive compensation package attached to it. And that's why too many of you are too focused on growing your company and not focused enough on growing you. Cause your company will never, ever exceed your identity or your vision for it. You gotta grow you, cause what will happen, when it starts to grow, you'll start making

• 27:40Ed Mylett?

  unconscious mistakes to shrink it, making bad calls, getting weak, getting lazy, making mistakes. You're all nodding, cause you've all done it, because at some point, your business got ahead of you. Far too many of you, in your life, are obsessed with what cab driver number two and bouncer number one, think about what you're doing. Instead of the lead characters. You're obsessed with what other people think about you. The thing that's gonna kill your dream, is your addiction to other people's approval. And cab driver number two, he ain't gonna approve of what you're doing. At the end of your damn life, he's not gonna show up in any of the important chapters, yet you give him all this power all the time. Stop giving people power, who aren't in your book. Do your life for the leading character.

• 28:22Ed Mylett?

  You, your spouse, your children, your parents, your legacy. They're the lead characters, in the story of you, of your life, and the more you focus on them. And I know, that many of them, are the very ones giving you a hard time. They're the very ones telling you, you can't make it, you should quit, you should give in. Let me tell you, somebody who experienced that, who's now written a pretty damn good book, they are thrilled with the book. And they knew you were gonna write it all the time someday. But you get focused on the lead character. Here's the good news. A leading character can decide to live a new script at any point she wants. She walked in here, one character, and she says, you know what? I am the lead character. This is some stupid script my parents gave me, or a script my boss gave me, or a script someone else gave me, or my husband gave me.

• 29:07Ed Mylett?

  You know what? Screw that. I'm the new leading character. This woman's more beautiful, more confident, more influential, more resilient, more evangelical. This woman's just a little stronger. And you leave here, in the break, and you just feel different. You decide, I'm a new character. I'm a new leading character in the book of my life. Because the more you decide to take control of the narrative, of the script of your life, and you live your dream, the more likely at the end of your life, you're gonna meet that dude. You're gonna meet that woman. See, at the end of my life, because I am a person of faith, the Lord's gonna go, "Hey." Hopefully, he goes, "Well done, good in faith, will serve it." And I have this other little hallucination. He's gonna go, "Hey, by the way, this guy over here, this is the man you could have been. This is the person you were born to be. All those choices you made, if you made them all,

• 29:51Ed Mylett?

  you got the right place, this is who you could have become. This would have been your dreams. This is where you would have gone, what you would have seen, who you would have helped, what you would have changed. This would have been your book. Meet him." My dream in my life is that when I meet that person, we're not total strangers. You don't want to get to the end of your life, and that character is a total stranger to you. I don't care if you have faith or not. You know damn well, there's gonna be a funeral for you someday. And at that funeral, there's gonna be a sense and a spirit of what you could have become. The woman, the man, you could have become. And every day, those decisions you're making to max out your life are chasing that person. See, you know what I want at the end of my life when I meet him? Watch how I pull this together. I want to be identical twins.

• 30:35Ed Mylett?

  I want to be identical twins. I want you to be identical twins. Ted and Ed are gonna meet each other someday, and I'm gonna say, "Hey, man, good to see you. Been riding with you for quite a while. Been chasing you, man." He's gonna go, "I've been watching you. You're exactly like me, man. We're identical twins. You maxed out your damn life. Congratulations." Max out, everybody. God bless you. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now on with the show. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. I'm Ed Mylett. Today, we're gonna talk about the echo of life, or the echoes in life. And what I mean by that is, you know that when you hear an echo, you've said something, but there's a delayed response

• 31:20Ed Mylett?

  until you hear it coming back at you, and then you experience the result. And that's how life works. See, today, one of the reasons so many people are confused about their lack of success is because we live in a very immediate gratification-type society. Meaning, people expect results to happen instantaneously because we can get access to information instantaneously. We can get on social media, we can get music, we can get a movie. We can get a Google search, we can get a book. We can get anything we want instantaneously. But what you can't get instantaneously is success in life. And we've been raised in a generation now, many of us, even older guys like me, we're programmed to get things right now. And this hurts us in life because we don't realize the echoes of life. See, for me, for example, when I'm having a difficult time in my life in one area or another,

• 32:05Ed Mylett?

  all I have to really do is look back 60 to 90 days, and it's the behaviors I had 60 to 90 days ago that are causing the results I get negatively right now. And so, for example, when I'm not really progressing in my career or in my financial situation, if I look back 60 to 90 days prior, I stopped reading the books, listening to the audios, doing the things that grow my identity, and I pay the price 60 to 90 days later. In my body, my body isn't looking like I want it to. If I look back 60 to 90, 120 days, that's when my diet got weaker. That's when my workouts weren't quite as intense as they were previously, and I pay the price three to four months later. This is true in every area of our life. Our lives are almost like reading a newspaper today,

• 32:49Ed Mylett?

  but we're reading the headlines from 90 days ago. And so, that's what confuses people. They see the external results of their life, but if you did, if you read the newspaper from 90 to 120 days ago, that's where the news was made, not today. And so, in every area of your life, you've got it going right now. You've got to fuel the fire. If you've got your business going, your finances going, your relationship going, your faith going where you want it to, you have to continue to do the activities that got you here in the first place because 90 days from now, you're going to read today's news. That's how it works. If today's news is you stopped telling the person you're with, you're loving them, if you stopped dating them like you did in the beginning, you stopped treating them a particular way, you're going to pay the price for it in 90 to 120 days. If you're not eating the way you want to,

• 33:34Ed Mylett?

  when you eat a piece of cake, you don't see the fat deposit the next day. There's a delay. And so, what happens is we do these negative behaviors, and because we don't see an instant pain or an instant consequence for it, we don't think the consequence is coming, but the consequences always come. There's a delayed consequence for everything we do. And so, today, you're getting the external results of 90 days ago's headlines of what you were doing. And the mistake most people make is they get things going in their life, they get their business going, and they stop the very things that got them there because they believe today is the headlines. But you're going to read it in 90 to 120 days. You're going to pay the price. And so, in every area, pour the flames on, pour the fuel on, do the things that got you there,

• 34:16Ed Mylett?

  but do more of it because there's an echo for today's behavior. The reverse is also true, and this is why most people give up on their dreams. Success, the echo is longer. In success, see, the negative comes 90 to 120 days. But the benefit, the gain, the increase, the result of doing the right things, is often delayed by six months, a year, 18 months, two years, sometimes five years. And so, what happens is, most people make these investments, they do all of the work. It's almost like a bank account. They make the deposit, they make the deposit, they make the deposit. And then they quit before they get to make the withdrawal. Because they don't see the results. In success, remember this. You're making these deposits, you're doing all the right things.

• 35:00Ed Mylett?

  It's not 90 days later, you get the result often. Sometimes it's not 120, sometimes it's not six months, sometimes it's not a year. Sometimes it's two years, and most people can't wait to make the withdrawal because they don't see the immediate result, or they go, "Well, wait a minute. When I do things wrong, I pay the price in 90 days. If I eat poorly, 90 days later, my body doesn't look good. If I don't perform right in my business, my business goes down 90 to 120 days later. If I don't read in my personal development, or listen to the podcast I'm supposed to, my identity shrinks 90 to 120 days. How come when I do the good things, the results don't come in 90 to 120 days? Sometimes they will. But oftentimes, the delayed gratification, the delayed benefit, is way off into the future.

• 35:44Ed Mylett?

  The people that win in life, accept both echoes. I accept in my life, I know it's a law of the universe, I know it's a life law, that if I don't do the right things, 90 to 120 days, I'm gonna pay the price. I also know, the other law is, if I'm doing the right things, the benefit, the body changing, the finances changing, the life changing, the relationship changing, might be delayed by six months, not 90 days, might be a year, might be two, might be five years in some areas. But I accept that there's always a payoff, remember this. There's always an echo. There's always a consequence. If you do the wrong things, no matter how good your business is right now, listen to me. You think you've got it going, and you're sloughing off a little bit.

• 36:29Ed Mylett?

  You're not quite in the office as early as you used to be. You're not making quite as many contacts as you once were. You're not quite as focused as you once were, because you think you got it, because you're reading 3 months ago's headlines, or 6 months ago's headlines. But I promise you, 90 to 120 days from now, you're going to read today's headlines. Make sure that you continue to do the right things. I've also, though, come to believe and know in my own life, because my life is evidence of it, that there's an echo for the positives too. I don't know when that one's coming back, but I know it comes back. I know for a fact that if I do the right things in my diet and my nutrition, my body and my workouts, my body eventually gives me the result. I know in my finances, if I do the right things, eventually there's an echo that comes back.

• 37:12Ed Mylett?

  I'll eventually read today's headlines in my life and celebrate them. I know in my relationships, if I invest and do the right things, the loving, the caring, the believing, the actions required, that at some point there's an echo that comes back and that relationship blossoms and flourishes. I know it in my identity, I know it in my self-confidence. If I do the right things, the echo comes back eventually. The thing to accept is it's going to come back. And if you know this, you begin to win. If you know this, you don't look at today's life and believe you've got it wired. You don't look at today's life and believe you're relegated to these results forever. You know there's a negative, which is 90 to 120 days, and you know that there's a positive, which that echo comes back longer. And the winners keep making the deposits, keep making the investments,

• 37:57Ed Mylett?

  because they know for a fact, for a fact, that eventually there's a withdrawal. One of my favorite parables in the Bible, and I'll probably mess this up because I do that all the time, but I mean this with the right intention, is the parable of the sower, which basically says that if you keep planting seeds, that eventually God will provide a harvest. I began to know that that's one of the laws of life, one of the echoes of life, is that there's a harvest. But those seeds that you're planting, or those phone calls, that diet, that workout, those things you do in your relationship, Investments you make in yourself and your identity, that if you keep planting those seeds, i.e. making those deposits, those investments, that eventually God will provide a harvest in your life. But not all the seeds reap a harvest.

• 38:38Ed Mylett?

  Sometimes you're gonna plant seeds that don't have great soil, or there's thorny soil and the seeds don't grow. The wind can get it, the rain can get it, the birds could take seeds, whatever can take the seeds. But eventually, if you keep planting the seeds, that there's a harvest that you will be rewarded with. And this is a life law, it's true in every area. There's also a negative harvest. The chickens do come home to roost in every area in our lives, but the negatives come home to roost much sooner than the positives do. And this is why most people are confused in their lives. They say to me, "Ed, I've been doing all the right things in my nutrition and in my workout, why isn't my body better?" Or, "I've been working on myself for a while now, I'm reading the books, I'm listening to your podcast, and I don't see the results just yet in my life." And it's confusing, because you say to yourself, "I'm doing the right things in the moment."

• 39:21Ed Mylett?

  But you're still reading yesterday's headlines, and sometimes the positive headlines can be, like I said, a year, 18 months, two years. But I promise you, the headlines change eventually. Don't be confused by your current conditions, remember this. Your current conditions, your current life does not dictate your future. Your past does not equal your future. Your present does not equal your future. What equals your future are those deposits and those investments you're making now. There will be an echo, there'll be a harvest. There is a consequence for every behavior in life. We need to accept this. There's negative consequences if we do the wrong things, no matter how good it looks right now. No matter how good your business, your finances, your relationship, your faith, your body looks right now.

• 40:06Ed Mylett?

  There are consequences if you slow down, there are consequences if you're not doing the right things. You are not immune to this. I've done a lot of podcasts or programs here on ego. If you begin to believe that you are immune from the echoes of life, you are immune from the positive and negative harvest, that's your ego speaking to you. Yes, Miss CEO, yes, Miss Perfect, yes, Mr. Successful financially right now, yes, the guy with the high self-confidence, even you will suffer from the echoes and the consequences of life. Control that and if you'll do the right things on a habitual and regular basis, you're assured long term of a positive harvest of a positive result in your life. And so I want to remind you today that you're in control of this.

• 40:50Ed Mylett?

  If you're a person of faith like I am, you and your God praying, you planting the seeds and him eventually blessing with the harvest. If you believe in plugging into the quantum field and, and I believe in both of those things, by the way, and getting the energy from the universe that can drive you, I promise you there's a consequence and there's a reaction for every action. Just sometimes it comes in a delayed fashion. There will be an echo in your life and my final question to you today is this. All of our actions echo into eternity, long after we're gone, our lives also have an echo. Listen to me, your life matters. What you do in your life matters. You were born to do something great with your life. You were put here for a reason, which is to make a difference in the world, which is to change your own family's tree,

• 41:33Ed Mylett?

  which is to do something great with your life. I promise you, you were put here for that in little ways and in big ways. And there will be an echo for your life. The actions of your life will echo into eternity. The question is, will that echo for you be a whisper into eternity or a roar? And you get to decide based on the actions you take every day in your life, whether the life of you, whether it had a big meaning and it roars into eternity, or whether you play small and you just whisper into eternity. You get to choose that. I know you were born to have a roaring echo in this world, long after you're here. The investments you make in your children and grandchildren into other people, that's part of the roar of your life.

• 42:16Ed Mylett?

  Maybe it's not a jet or a beach house, but it's the good things you do. It's the seeds you sow of goodness and the contributions you make for others, the ripple into other people over and over again, far beyond what you can even imagine. That's your legacy. That's your life roaring its echo into eternity. But if you shrink, if you play small, if you don't take risks, if you don't take those actions, if you don't keep improving, you don't keep growing, then your life will just whisper into eternity and you weren't put here to be a whisper. You were put here to be a roar into eternity. I know that for you. I'm 100% convinced of what I'm telling you here today. I believe in you. I love you. And I know you've got what it takes. Just remember this.

• 42:56Ed Mylett?

  Make the deposits, make the investments, plant the seeds. There'll be a harvest. It just is going to be delayed in God's time or in delayed time. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. If you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Mylett Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. This episode is sponsored by Ro. A lot of people assume GLP-1's cost a fortune, and that assumption keeps them from even looking into treatment. Ro helps people find a more affordable path to FDA-approved GLP-1 treatment. Ro wants to help people lose weight. That's why they have more affordable GLP-1 options, whether you're paying with insurance or cash. Ro's free insurance checker makes it easy to see if you're covered for GLP-1 injections.

• 43:39Ed Mylett?

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• 44:23Ed Mylett?

  And that's where Wayfair came in. My wife wanted to get this new garden bed, and Wayfair was the place that offered the perfect solution. Wayfair also helps you create a home that stands up to real life with quality products, great value, and trusted reviews. Wayfair verified products are hand-vetted by product specialists. They use a 10-point quality inspection system. Here's all I can tell you. The stuff has lasted over time, it looks great, and I get compliments on it. Shop thousands of products across every style and budget, whether you're trying to refresh your space for fall or transform your space for Halloween. Use filters, custom photos, and reviews to find the right fit for your home. More than 20 million verified five-star reviews. 20 million. So transform your space with the pieces that hold up to real life. Join Wayfair Rewards today and get 5% back on every purchase.

• 45:05Ed Mylett?

  Head to wayfair.com or shop the Wayfair app for all things home. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R dot com.

• 45:19Ed Mylett?

  Today, what I want to talk about is qualifications for your dreams.

• 45:23Ed Mylett?

  Most times in life, we do everything we can to disqualify ourselves from our dreams and our potential. And I want you to think about this just for a minute. I really believe, and I want to make a bold statement in the beginning, that you were born to do something great with your life. And that you're not disqualified, no matter what's happened in your life, good, bad, or indifferent. Or maybe it's just been average and ordinary the entire time. You are not disqualified from making your dreams, your purpose, your vision, a reality in your life. But what we do often, and I've done it many times, is I think my past disqualifies me. Or some mistake I've made. So we hold ourselves, it's almost like a weapon we use against ourselves. Is we hold our past mistakes, our past failures, our past setbacks, our past average performance and behavior.

• 46:09Ed Mylett?

  As if it's a predictor of what our future is. We think we're disqualified, so. I'm here to tell you that the things that maybe, that are the biggest setbacks of your life. The things you might be most ashamed of, the biggest disappointments, the biggest, what you might call failures. Where people have hurt you, or maybe you even hurt others, sins you've had, mistakes. You know, I've had a divorce, so I'm disqualified from winning. Not true. Or I've had this setback, no, you're not disqualified. Well, I've had a bankruptcy, or I had a business failure, or I, I've just always been invisible and average, so I'm disqualified from ever doing something great in my life. And nothing could be further from the truth. It's the great lie of life. The great lie of our lives is we begin to stack things that didn't work out. As evidence that we can't win in the future.

• 46:54Ed Mylett?

  As evidence it's not going to work. We actually also literally think it disqualifies us somehow from winning. And I'm here to tell you that is a great lie that millions of people around the world are telling themselves. And what if I was to tell you that I think those same divorces, setbacks, failures, sins, mistakes. The average performance of your past are the very things that do qualify you to change other people's lives and fulfill your destiny. That's what I actually believe. See, in life, if you really want to impress people. Show them how perfect you are, show them your best Instagram photo, your biggest achievement, the best things you've done in your life. How happy and smart and amazing you are. You really impress people.

• 47:38Ed Mylett?

  And you'll connect with nobody. And you will change nobody's life. But, on the other hand, if your ambition is to change other people's lives, is to make a difference with your own life, to make an impact on people's lives, then show them your imperfections. If you show them your imperfections, you will connect with them. Let me give you the best example in the world. Someone said this on my show many times, I've said it before. You are most qualified to help the person or people you used to be. Say that to you again. You are most qualified in your life to help the person or people you used to be. Rory Vaden said that on my show. I've said that back since 1997, a version of that. I just didn't know how true it was until recently.

• 48:22Ed Mylett?

  So as you all know, I wrote the number one bestselling nonfiction book in the world this year called The Power of One More. If you haven't got that book, I would recommend you go get that book. I believe it'll change your life. But after I wrote that book and it became a bestseller, I woke up one night, and the book is really about the lessons I learned from my dad. As many of you know, but some may not, my dad was an alcoholic and a drug addict for the first thirty-five, or first fifteen years of my life. And then he got sober when I was fifteen. And he made one decision to do that, and stayed sober one day at a time for the rest of his life. And I'm in the personal development, the change your life space, because I believe human beings can change. In fact, I don't believe it, I know it. And the reason that I know it is because my own hero did it.

• 49:08Ed Mylett?

  I watched my dad live a particular way that wasn't great the first fifteen years of my life. And then the next thirty-five years of my life, I watched him live as a completely different man. A magnificent life, a giving life, a kind life, a beautiful life. A heavenly life. So I know humans can change because I watched my hero do it. But what's most amazing about my dad's sobriety is I woke up one night, many months ago, crying in my sleep, and I woke up and I said to my wife, she goes, "What's wrong?" And I said, I said, "Well, you're not gonna believe this, but I just realized something. Someone helped daddy. Someone helped my dad." She goes, "What are you talking about?" And I said, "Well, when dad got sober, someone helped my dad change his life.

• 49:52Ed Mylett?

  Some precious human being stepped forward and said, 'I can help you.'" See, we're born in our life to do great things in our life, big and small, but we don't know when we're doing them, whether they're big or small. We don't know the ripple effects. And I said, "Someone helped my father in the worst moment of his life." My dad was either gonna take his own life or lose his family. And in that terrible moment, I don't even know where it was. Was it a bar somewhere, an alley? I don't know who they are or where it happened. But what I know is some human being changed my dad's life, which then changed my life, and I've changed millions of people's lives. This precious human being has no idea that that one act, that one generosity, that one helping one person, has impacted millions of people,

• 50:37Ed Mylett?

  because they helped my father in that alley or that bar somewhere. Is that not remarkable? That one act, the ripple effect, has affected millions of people's lives. And that's not the most remarkable part of it, even though that's crazy to think that as a human, you have that power. You help one person. The ripple effects are unknown. That's not the most amazing part. The most amazing part is what was it that qualified that precious human to help my father? What were their qualifications?

• 51:10Ed Mylett?

  The very things that most people would think disqualified them. The things that that person was most ashamed of, their biggest failures, their biggest sins. You know what qualified that person to help my dad? They were also an alcoholic at one time. They were also a drug addict at one time. They also lied and cheated and stole money and lived in the shadows. The things that person would think, "My gosh, my alcoholism, my drug addiction, my lying, my theft, my shadowy life, all those things." The worst things about me. I'm totally disqualified from having a great life, from living a dream, from helping other people. If anyone's disqualified, it's me. Wrong. Actually, those were the very things God was using. using, the universe was using to qualify that person to meet the moment to help my dad when

• 51:53Ed Mylett?

  he was gonna take his life or lose his family. I want you to understand and think about the power of that. The very thing that human being probably walked around most of their life thinking, now that's the weapon I use against me, why I can't win, why I can't be happy, why I can't help people, why I can't. Other people could win, just not someone like me, not someone where I come from, not with my family, not with my background, not with my mistakes, not with the fact that I've always been average and ordinary, not the fact that I'm invisible. No, no, no, no, sorry, guess what? Those very things that you use as a weapon against you that you think disqualify you are the very things that do qualify you. That person didn't know, all those years they were using drugs and suffering, all those

• 52:36Ed Mylett?

  years that years they were drinking alcohol and making mistakes and hurting other people and probably lying and probably stealing and probably living in the shadows. Every single one of those things was preparing them for that moment to help somebody who was the person they used to be, my dad. You are most qualified to help the person you used to be in your life. I'm a living proof of it. By the way, so are you. As you're listening to this or you're watching this, you are part of the ripple effect of that one act, that human being who helped my dad, who helped me, who's now helping you. What I hope you do today is, by the way, you share this episode with somebody so that

• 53:20Ed Mylett?

  ripple continues. I want the world to understand one thing, you are not disqualified for making your dreams come true. I don't care, some people think, well, that's what I look like, it's where I come from, it's the mistake I made, it's what, it's none of that crap. Those are the very things that are qualifying you right now because you are most qualified to help the person you used to be, and by the way. That's why growing matters. Because every time you grow into a new version of you, you are most qualified to help the people who you used to be. And then you grow up, people, why do you still grow and read and expand? Because I know every time I grow and change, I now can help that person I used to be. Those people that I used to be. If you were once broke and now have figured out how to make money, you can help broke people.

• 54:04Ed Mylett?

  If you were once overweight and now are fit, you can help all those people. If you were once broke in and now are a little bit less broken, you can help broken people. If you were once invisible and average and ordinary and in despair, you can help people who feel average and ordinary and invisible and in despair. If you were once insecure and shy, and maybe you are right now, and lack self-confidence, or lack direction, or lack purpose, and then now you find it and discover it. You can help all those people in the world who currently lack purpose, lack confidence, lack inspiration. We are most qualified in our life to help the person or people we used to be, and never underestimate the ripple effect of you just saying, hey, I'm imperfect too.

• 54:49Ed Mylett?

  But this is what I've learned. And I'm here for you, and I love you, and I believe in you. I honestly believe that if this one message reached millions of people, we would have a different world. We'd be a little bit less judgmental. We'd give each other a little bit more grace. We'd have way more people pursuing their potential and their dreams. See, I have an addiction, I have a lot of them, but my main addiction is I'm addicted to the expansion of my being. I'm curious and fascinated by what my capacity can be to do different things in my life. And that constant pursuit of potential, that constant pursuit of growth, that lack of judging myself, that lack of assessment of negative thoughts about myself,

• 55:32Ed Mylett?

  and giving myself grace of knowing, yeah, I just made a mistake, but guess what, I've learned from that mistake, I've grown from it, and now I'm qualified to help the people who may make those same mistakes. The reason I do this show is because I just have a lot of experience with failure. I have a lot of experience with setbacks and frustrations. I know what it's like to live scared. I know what it's like to live with negative emotions. I know what it's like to live afraid, to live angry, to be depressed. I know what it's like to be broken.

• 56:05Ed Mylett?

  I know what it's like to be broke. I know what it's like to not have electricity in my house. I know what it's like not have running water. I know what it's like to beg for money at a gas station so that I could get to my house. Now that I think about it.

• 56:21Ed Mylett?

  I know what it's like.

• 56:24Ed Mylett?

  And you know what? That's what qualifies me to help people. See, it takes leaders with vision to help people with dreams.

• 56:34Ed Mylett?

  Not perfect people.

• 56:37Ed Mylett?

  None of us are perfect. I get emotional when I share this with you.

• 56:43Ed Mylett?

  Not for me, but for you. I want you to make your life something awesome. I want you to change other people's lives. And I know most of the time you feel disqualified to do it. And I hope today, maybe you get a little bit of a glimpse of exactly how qualified you are. I think God's a really interesting dude. And I think he sits there and goes, if I could just get my children to understand, I'm preparing you every day to make a difference in the world. I'm preparing you every day to change your own life, to change other people's lives. And that you're immensely qualified, that the DNA of the King of Kings runs through your, your bloodstream. I just want to remind you today, as you're listening to this, that you're born to do something awesome with your life.

• 57:28Ed Mylett?

  And I'm here to help you every step of the way, along the way. But you gotta take the first step today. And that step today is just to believe that you're qualified, you're immensely qualified, you're immensely capable, you're awesome. With all your mistakes, all your weaknesses, all your sins, all the things you're not so good at. All the things that you wish you were better at, that you see other people have, you wish you looked this way, or talked that way, or thought that way, or had that family. You're perfectly you. You're perfectly you in this moment. And the minute you accept that, you understand how qualified you are to change your own life and to change other people's lives. And I think one of the things you could do today that would qualify you is to share

• 58:09Ed Mylett?

  my message, is to share these thoughts with people so that people maybe today get a little bit of a glimpse into what's possible. Your decisions shape your destiny, everybody. And the minute you decide that you're qualified, your life changes. Before we start the interview with my next guest, just want to remind you all that you can subscribe to the show on YouTube or follow the show on Apple or Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now on with the show. Welcome back, everybody. Today's gonna be awesome. I got a great friend here, someone I'm very, very proud of and very fond of. I have great affection for this man. I admire him, makes me emotional, and I respect him.

• 58:49Ed Mylett?

  And I think probably in my life, the last five, six years, he may have, he's potentially grown more as a person than anybody that I know, and I loved him and thought he was amazing when I met him. And this is a guy in the pursuit of greatness. And it just so happens, he's got a new book out called The Greatness Mindset. Unlock the power of your mind and live your best life today. This man's immensely qualified to talk on this topic. Lewis Howes, welcome, brother.

• 59:17Lewis Howes?

  Thanks, Ed. Appreciate it, brother.

• 59:18Ed Mylett?

  Good to have you. A lot of the things you have in here are about stories and that we live our stories. And chapter three is the first thing I wanted to ask you about, missing your meaningful mission. What causes someone to not know their mission and miss it? Is it they spend too much time in the former story? That they've taken meanings that don't serve them from the story? What causes somebody to do that?

• 59:38Lewis Howes?

  All of that and the fears that hold them back. And there's really three fears that I've identified, which is the fear of failure, the fear of success, and the fear of judgment. And when we can reflect on analyzing which one of these hold me back the most and what is the root cause of me living in that fear, then we can start to, again, mend the wounds and create meaning from those wounds and then create a new meaningful mission moving forward. For a lot of my life, I don't know if you've ever been in this place, I was so driven to succeed because I didn't feel enough.

• 1:00:09Ed Mylett?

  Yes.

• 1:00:09Lewis Howes?

  And I thought by succeeding, achieving, getting awards, getting followers, making more money, would fill the hole of not feeling enoughness, not smart enough, not talented enough, not good-looking enough, whatever it was. Is that something you've experienced in your past? One billion percent exactly the same, yes. And for me, I would get, I don't know about you, but when I would experience success in sports and then early in business, it's almost like 20 minutes after I accomplished a goal of 10 years I was chasing, I was angry. Yep. I don't know if you ever felt that way. Hundred percent. Angry and was kind of like mad at everyone around me. Yes. Like when everyone's celebrating me, I was kind of like, get away from me. Yes. And I didn't understand it. Hmm. Until I started the healing journey about 10 years ago. So this is what happened for me.

• 1:00:54Lewis Howes?

  Good. I realized that my fear, when I started to dissect this, I was never afraid of failure. And I don't think you ever were either because you're an athlete. And athletes who go through the journey of multiple sports, which we both played multiple sports. We have coaches that say, hey, it's okay to fail, you know, just adjust it a little bit, adjust your shot, adjust your swing a little bit. Yep. You're gonna miss, you're gonna miss it. Yes. But here's how you adjust it. Hmm. It was always feedback, it was information. Hmm. So it wasn't like you suck and leave if you fail. We failed every day. Yes. And we knew that this was the process to success. I became familiar with failure. Exactly. Yeah. Then the greatest, uh, you know, baseball players in the world fail 70% of the time, right?

• 1:01:37Lewis Howes?

  It's like they're failing constantly, but we celebrate them for their, for their successes. And so I was never like ashamed to like miss a shot or fail because I knew it was just practice.

• 1:01:49Lewis Howes?

  And I always wanted success, so I wasn't afraid of success. I wanted success for the wrong reasons though. And that's why I was upset and angry when I would accomplish it. And I didn't feel like, I feel like I needed more. Me too. But I was like, I want to accomplish success, I'm excited about it, so I'm not afraid of it. But I was afraid of judgment, I was afraid of the opinions of other people. And I was afraid of what people would say in front of my face, behind my face, would they accept me, all these different things. Hmm. When I ask people in, in a big room, um, who's afraid of failure? Most people raise their hand and say, this is a fear of mine. Hmm. And that's why they don't launch their book or their podcast, or they don't start speaking on stage, or they don't start a new career, or ask the person out. Hmm. They're afraid to fail.

• 1:02:32Lewis Howes?

  And I ask people, okay, for everyone who's afraid of success, raise your hands. And almost equally amount of people raise their hand who are afraid of success. And I never understood it because I always wanted it. And over the last 10 years, I started to ask why. There is a documentary called The Weight of Gold.

• 1:02:49Ed Mylett?

  Okay.

• 1:02:50Lewis Howes?

  I want people to watch this at some point because it's about Olympic gold medalists who go depressed, commit suicide, have overdoses within like six months or a year after they win the gold. If we do not prepare ourselves for success, it could cripple us. And the pressure of, okay, now friends and family want more from you. I know you are extremely wealthy and you've had to deal with probably lots of people asking for things all the time. Can you give me money? Can you help me with this? Can you do this for me? And in some ways, it's a great privilege to be generous and supportive to people. But when it feels inauthentic, you feel like people are taking advantage of you. And so that pressure of success is real and people don't want that responsibility.

• 1:03:34Lewis Howes?

  They're afraid of that pressure leaning into it. I always wanted it. But when I started to accomplish, I started to notice, oh, yeah, I don't like some of these things that come with it as well. So I have to learn how to manage it. But it was the fear of judgment which always crippled me. So I was extremely self-critical of everything. Even when I broke the world record, even when I was a two-sport All-American, even when I played the USA handball team, even when I hit my first million dollars after I was broke, I was so self-critical because at the root cause of all three of these fears is I am not enough. Gosh. And the I am not enough-ness will destroy us. It will hold us back from our truest gifts, from expressing our love, from being generous, from being open.

• 1:04:17Lewis Howes?

  And that's the thing that I had to learn how to heal. Why do I not feel enough? No matter what I accomplish, I still don't feel enough. Why am I never satisfied with me? It was never about the accomplishments. It was always back to the root of me. I don't feel enough. I don't feel lovable is what it really is. And I need to accomplish more in order for others to love and accept me. But really, at the end of the day, I did not love and accept myself. And when we can learn the art of loving and accepting ourselves authentically for all of our flaws and all of our beauty, that's when we can start stepping into true greatness.

• 1:04:57Ed Mylett?

  Louis, I feel like you just described me.

• 1:05:00Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 1:05:00Ed Mylett?

  Yeah. Yeah, yeah, you know, um, bro.

• 1:05:08Ed Mylett?

  Tell me, tell me more. Well, uh, I don't even know that I have fixed that yet. I'm not sure. I think I've made progress on it, but this notion of, cause what you just said, fear of failure, nah, not too much. No. And people say I'm afraid to succeed. I've always thought, and there's just, people are different on their experience. Like, why would you be afraid of success? I know. But fear of judgment, holy smokes, I almost feel like you've created a new category that maybe if people really analyze it, a lot of us fit into that one. Yes. If you have a fear of failure, is it the failure you're afraid of or the judgment that would come with the failure? And so when I looked at category three, I'm reading the book the other night, cause you gave it to me maybe a week ago or two weeks ago. I'm like, oh man, fear of failure, it's like this old school's fear of success, yeah, fear of judgment, oh boy, he's on to something right here.

• 1:05:53Ed Mylett?

  And it is exactly what you just said. I am not enough. I'm not, and if you go even a little bit deeper, it's what you said. I had our mutual friend that you introduced me to, Leanne Rimes on my show. And I finally said to her in the interview, you know what my issue is? I can give love to people. I don't allow myself to feel loved. And she said the same thing. And it's weird for two big dudes that are accomplished, you know, two guys sitting here to share this. But I think it's powerful that we are. I'm still not sure right now that that's not something that needs more exploration for me, that I'm still, and I wonder it with you too. Yeah. Is there a little bit, maybe it's, maybe I've made progress and it's reduced. But there are a lot of moments, if I'm being real, where I should be experiencing more joy than I do from something.

• 1:06:35Ed Mylett?

  I should be experiencing more love than I allow myself to experience. And it's pretty obvious to me that that's probably because my dad was an alcoholic and I probably lacked a little bit of that and all that anxiety. But you are on to something so huge here, which is the next thing you have in there, which is the dream killer, which is called self doubt. Yeah. I feel like judgment and self doubt are sort of related somehow. Do you?

• 1:07:00Lewis Howes?

  I think self doubt is the killer of all dreams and and that's why I love you and your message because you instill so much belief in people you you give people belief by your presence by just your way of being it's so powerful and and I think the whole game is learning how to believe in ourselves that is the game of life I think it's what allows you to accomplish any goal you want the more belief you have and I love your definition of you know self esteem and self belief this concept is really being your word you know you've heard you say this a lot of times like when you can live to your word and be that and honor it or take responsibility when you're not with your word and take responsibility for that as well

• 1:07:43Lewis Howes?

  you start to become more believable to yourself and others believe you as well you've become a credible person to yourself and others and that attracts more things so self doubt for me is that is the killer of dreams and I think I wanted to ask you another thing to follow up on that

• 1:07:58Ed Mylett?

  the interview in your always comes out

• 1:08:00Lewis Howes?

  well I'm just curious because I wanted to ask you about do you worry more about the judgments of other people or do you worry more about the judgments of yourself about you

• 1:08:09Ed Mylett?

  I think it's moved from other people to me and I think that was probably the cause the whole time so it was easy for me to worry about what are they gonna say what are they gonna believe what if I fail here

• 1:08:22Ed Mylett?

  opinions of others but I feel like that's more the symptom if I'm being I'm just answering you right now on the moment on the fly I think the disease is me not believing I'm worthy of it I was talking to a mutual friend of ours that you're about to go see and we were both describing to each other today he's a very successful guy that I still have a lot of imposter syndrome at 50 years old and and this dude has no reason to have any either and he has it and I think even sometimes I see this in you now part of me thinks that's driven me to do extra work and prepare more and that might work when you're starting but it's a painful way to live your life

• 1:08:59Lewis Howes?

  exhausting later

• 1:09:00Ed Mylett?

  it's exhausting I mean I'm so glad you're saying that because don't you feel that way that if I don't and I would like you to unpack that thing you I want to go back a little bit and stay there for a minute this idea of working on healing oneself and loving oneself

• 1:09:14Ed Mylett?

  Man, everybody, listen to me. I know leveraging the dark side is a common thing, and it does work, and you should do it, and there's a great space for it for a while.

• 1:09:24Lewis Howes?

  For a while.

• 1:09:24Ed Mylett?

  But if it's the only thing that moves you, don't you agree? It's just eventually miserable.

• 1:09:30Lewis Howes?

  It's exhausting after a while.

• 1:09:30Ed Mylett?

  It's exhausting, right?

• 1:09:32Lewis Howes?

  And I think, and I think, you know, we all have our own hero's journey to fall on that dark side, you know, early to push us. It's a driver to overcome something, right? But I think we've got to learn how to mend and heal at some point. Otherwise, it's going to constantly be exhausting and feel I'm not enough, or this is, I'm always fighting something.

• 1:09:50Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:50Lewis Howes?

  I'm always trying to fight, and that was most of my life was a fight. Everything was a fight.

• 1:09:55Ed Mylett?

  Me too.

• 1:09:55Lewis Howes?

  Relationship, competition, sports, business, it's all like a fight.

• 1:09:59Ed Mylett?

  Fight.

• 1:09:59Lewis Howes?

  And it's exhausting.

• 1:10:00Ed Mylett?

  But you end up not winning.

• 1:10:02Lewis Howes?

  Never.

• 1:10:02Ed Mylett?

  Never.

• 1:10:03Lewis Howes?

  And the people around you don't win either, so it's a lose-lose battle.

• 1:10:06Ed Mylett?

  Hmm.

• 1:10:07Lewis Howes?

  And there might feel like there's certain moments of success, but it's a lose-lose. And so my emotional coach, I started this journey two years ago with her, and I've been healing, doing different healing modalities for 10 years. 10 years ago, I opened up about sexual abuse for the first time. It was about four months after I launched my podcast, right? So it's almost been 10 years since I started talking about that process. And I thought, man, okay, that took about two years to go through a process of healing that and talking about it in a, in a, in a safe environment, where I felt like I can speak about this, and it no longer triggers me, or affects me, or has power over me. Like, I healed that memory and that wound. Now, it didn't mean I, but what I didn't, and I thought I was good,

• 1:10:52Lewis Howes?

  because I was like, okay, this is the main wound, but there's other stuff that I wasn't effacing. And that's why I kept repeating patterns in relationships and intimacy, and thinking, oh, I, I thought I healed this. But healing is not a one-time event. Healing is a journey, and it's a constant process. You're in progress, right? You're, you're better than you were before.

• 1:11:13Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:14Lewis Howes?

  And I feel like I'm going to be healing for the rest of my life.

• 1:11:16Ed Mylett?

  Me too.

• 1:11:17Lewis Howes?

  And constantly holding myself accountable. Because, as you know, I'm sure things get you triggered from time to time, and you feel like, oh, this person did this, and I don't like it, and there's a reaction. I think that's our normal competitive edge, where it's like, I'm going to come back, I'm going to come at you.

• 1:11:31Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 1:11:32Lewis Howes?

  And that energy will fuel us to get results, but will not fuel us to get fulfillment. And so I've learned how to manage that energy and I still get triggered and reactive and all these things. I'm not like this perfect human.

• 1:11:47Lewis Howes?

  But I do emotional coaching every two weeks to get me back to a place of peace. So it just helps me integrate the lessons I'm learning, reflect on, oh, I went back into that place of pain. Let me keep integrating and keep healing and just the more I practice it like anything, the better it gets.

• 1:12:02Ed Mylett?

  It's so apparent because you give off an energy now that's really loving and kind. Like Louis does this thing when he hugs you.

• 1:12:12Ed Mylett?

  First off, he just swallows you up because he's massive. But he does this thing where he holds you a little bit longer than might be comfortable for you initially. And then you're like, this actually feels really good.

• 1:12:20Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, well, some people don't like it, but I also.

• 1:12:22Ed Mylett?

  No, I know exactly why you do it and you're a hundred percent right. If we're just talking as brothers here, you can fix, you can think you've healed something. But if you haven't changed the patterns in which you live your life, like for example, when my dad got sober, he fixed the issue with drinking alcohol. But he still had the, what they call like the alcoholic's personality.

• 1:12:42Lewis Howes?

  Of course.

• 1:12:42Ed Mylett?

  Right? Very obsessive, went to anger quickly.

• 1:12:45Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:45Ed Mylett?

  You know, would, would remove himself emotionally from situations, didn't listen, didn't pay attention very well. So the pattern stayed the same.

• 1:12:54Lewis Howes?

  He wasn't doing the drinking, but he was still the personality.

• 1:12:56Ed Mylett?

  That's exactly right. And I think that's an evaluation for everybody. And by the way, I think Louis and I would both tell you, there's a place to leverage a dark side. Hundred percent. A light that's just light all the time. Sometimes a little bit of the dark side makes the light side even brighter. But we're both telling you, you get to another side of this stuff and you have to bring you with you eventually.

• 1:13:14Lewis Howes?

  Exactly. And our mutual friend, Dr. Joe Dispenza says your personality becomes your personal reality.

• 1:13:21Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:22Lewis Howes?

  And so if you haven't, again, mended your personality, that is. Fractured and causes you to be triggered or reactive or angry or lash out or close down or hold your heart back, then you're going to keep bringing that personal reality into your life. And so we've got to mend the, the things that caused us to have a certain personality that doesn't serve us or the people around us.

• 1:13:43Ed Mylett?

  So good. That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Mylett Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. So you know those pieces in your closet that you find yourself wearing like on repeat all the time? That sweater that kind of just goes with everything or these perfect pair of pants? Those are the pieces that make getting dressed easy and that's what Quince does best. Quince focuses on high quality wardrobe staples with premium materials like a hundred percent Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton. The styles are timeless, versatile and designed to become the dependable pieces you reach for every day. It's what I'm wearing right now. They give you the softness and quality you'd expect from a luxury brand without the price tag. Quince also makes premium pants, fitted tees and polos and breathable activewear. Quality basics designed to work with your wardrobe

• 1:14:27Ed Mylett?

  and hold up to everyday wear. I love their cotton tees. I'm wearing one now and I get a ton of compliments when I wear them on the podcast and when I speak. So find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com/ed for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. That's Q U I N C E dot com slash ed. So you know, I've been trying to take my health and my morning routine to the next level. And I used to do a whole bunch of different stuff, tons of different supplements. And then I found all in one in a drink with IM8. IM8 is the way to simplify your supplement routine, finally, once and for all. 16 supplements replaced 90 ingredients across nine major

• 1:15:10Ed Mylett?

  organ systems in one drink. You can have all these supplements for $2.61 a day. I've changed my mornings. The whole IM8 routine has changed my mornings. I feel great and I bring energy to the entire day. Go to IM8health.com/ed10 right now, or click the link in the description and use code ED10 for a free welcome kit. Five free travel sachets plus 10% off your order. That's code ED10 at IM8health.com/ed10. Code ED10 at IM8health.com/ed10. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

• 1:15:51Damon West?

  Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest.

• 1:15:54Ed Mylett?

  Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the show. This week, plot twist. We're turning the tables on me. And I'm being interviewed by my dear friend, Jamie Kern Lima, about my new book, The Power of One More. And I say some things in this interview that I've never said before publicly or privately in my life. It was a deeply emotional, very revealing interview for me, and I'm sure that it will be for you as well. So, enjoy. God bless you.

• 1:16:20Jamie Kern Lima?

  So you said this quote, "You have it within you. I'm no different than you. I wasn't born with some magic gene that you don't have. I just wanted to win so bad that I didn't allow anyone or anything to steal my dreams. Procrastination is a thief and fear is a liar." So, first question on that is, growing up, what were your greatest fears?

• 1:16:48Ed Mylett?

  I had so many. It's really weird as you're asking that. I was starting to actually get emotional.

• 1:16:57Ed Mylett?

  Because I was picturing, I was picturing me as a little guy. And it's just dawnening on me how scared I always was, you know?

• 1:17:14Ed Mylett?

  All the time. So, I was afraid my dad was gonna leave.

• 1:17:25Ed Mylett?

  I was afraid he was gonna get hurt, or killed, or hurt us, sometimes.

• 1:17:33Ed Mylett?

  And those, those, the, the idea of fear was around me all the time. So, just going to school afraid I'd embarrass myself. No one would know this, because I had this pretty good mask I could kind of put on, where, I don't know why it makes me so, I mean, it's bizarre right now.

• 1:17:55Ed Mylett?

  It's just, if I'll be real about what I'm thinking right now, you know what I'm telling you what I'm thinking? I'm actually thinking I still am. I'm actually thinking I still am. So, and I don't know that...

• 1:18:07Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, I was afraid of everything. So I was afraid of being a failure. I was afraid of letting people down. I was afraid my family wasn't gonna exist. I was afraid of afraid people would figure out who I was and that I wasn't that special. Figure out how average I was. Um, when I even had success, like when I played baseball, I'd have this fear that I was, it was a fluke. I still have a lot of that to this day where I'm like, it's a fluke. They're gonna figure me out eventually. They're gonna figure out I'm not that big of a deal. So, I think that, now, I will say that I think those of you that are like, wow, relating to that a little bit. I think not all emotions are negative or positive. Some fear is healthy.

• 1:18:48Ed Mylett?

  Some fear causes us to focus. Some fear causes us to make our best effort, right? We were given fear back in the caveman days so that T-Rex didn't eat us, right? So there's some fear, but to be riddled with it all the time. And I think I'm still a little bit of that guy. I think I still have a lot of it. So I had lots of fear. I had a lot of chaos. I realized as I got older, I, and by the way, we, I talk about in the book that you have an emotional home, that you have these three or four or five emotions you get on a really regular basis. And it's just, the reason I get emotional talking about it right now, and I've never said what I just said out loud, ever. Not to my wife, not to you, not to anybody, not to myself.

• 1:19:28Ed Mylett?

  Is that even though I've worked really hard on taking an inventory of what emotions I want. I want peace. I want joy. I want ecstasy. I want happiness. And I've really got a lot of those. Like, I really have intentionally given myself the gift of those emotions. The one that I've not riddled myself, riddled myself of regularly is fear. I'm still afraid. I'm afraid the book's not gonna be successful. I'm afraid my podcast isn't gonna do well. I'm afraid my speech isn't gonna go well. And so, the truth is, I still have a lot of that. And that's a good thing. At 51 years old, to say, hey, there's still room for me to improve. There's still things I gotta work on. And I don't want anybody that follows my stuff all the time or me to think, oh, he's got every single thing figured out.

• 1:20:11Ed Mylett?

  The truth is, as I'm talking to you, I'm realizing even a little bit more, not realizing I was gonna say this at all today, but that, uh, that's still a thing I gotta really address, is fear. Yeah.

• 1:20:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you have a fear right now that if you lose your fear, you'll lose your edge?

• 1:20:26Ed Mylett?

  Yes. You're so brilliant. Yes, we have these things that we do in life that we think are why we're successful. Now unconsciously, I know that too. Like, I know that, I used to think my intensity, almost my temper when I was young in business, thought, hey, you take away my temper, you know, because I'm winning with my temper. Right? So you take that away, I'm not gonna win. The truth is, I was winning in spite of my temper. I was winning in spite of my lack of emotional control. But this fear dude's been with me since I can remember. This fear is my friend. This fear is like my closest companion. Right? And so, to let go of that guy is, uh, makes me fearful, is to do it.

• 1:21:10Ed Mylett?

  And I think sometimes what you think when you have that thing, is you think, I'm just talking from my perspective, I can manage it. I'll manage it. And I, maybe I do manage it sometimes, okay. But I shouldn't be as afraid as I am. I don't need to be afraid, you know? And I still have a huge amount of it. So yeah, I do have this thing, like if I let that go, I wonder what my mechanism to achieve is. Like, what's the driver now? If I'm not afraid of anything, then am I just gonna start laying around and doing something? Doing nothing? You know? So I do have an element of that. And I actually have tools for this in the book, that I should give myself the gift of using. So it's a great question.

• 1:21:50Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah, you do. And I'm wondering, just hearing you talk about this, there's a famous quote by the rapper 50 Cent that says, "Either pray or worry, but don't do both." I'm wondering too, in your journey of fear, being an emotional home for you, to use your, your, um, your reference, like, is this, is this part of your spiritual journey to learn that it's not all on you?

• 1:22:16Ed Mylett?

  Yes. And when I'm good, that's what I, I've told you this too. When I'm really feeling like I'm in my calling, or doing something, I'm, or I'm at my best, is when I am in that state. I also think it's probably why I, I do pray so often. I wonder if sometimes I'm praying to rid that monster that's like, sitting there all the time. It's why I am such a praying person. And yes, certainly, like consciously, I know that it's not me anyway. Consciously, I know that I'm being protected. But I'll, I'll share something really personal, like, like I feel like I'm talking to you. I forget that it's my show. But, um, it just dawned on me as you were saying that.

• 1:22:55Ed Mylett?

  I pray for protection and comfort every day. So my prayers evolve about different things I'm working on, but one that never leaves me is that, that, you know, Lord, let your will be done and allow me to surrender to your will and protect me. And my dad used to, before games, when I would play, my dad would never, we would never pray that I'd get three hits in a game. My dad would always say, just pray that God protects you, protects everybody else, and that you get to play to the best of your ability. And if that's enough, great, and if it's not, great. And that prayer would always really comfort me before events. And I still do that before we do this, or before, you know, I speak, or I have a big

• 1:23:39Ed Mylett?

  meeting or anything, I always just pray that same exact, I don't know why it makes me so emotional, but I just pray that exact same prayer, you know, that your will be done, and I just do the best that you can have me do. And if that's enough, great, and if it's not, that's okay. So.

• 1:23:53Damon West?

  Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest.

• 1:24:03Ed Mylett?

  All right, everybody. My guest today, 13 years ago today, was sentenced to essentially life in prison. 13 years ago today. And then he finds himself sitting across from me 13 years later, having completely transformed his life, and has become one of the great speakers on planet Earth, one of the great influencers on planet Earth, and has become dear friends with many of my best friends. And it's one of the most remarkable stories you are ever gonna hear in your damn life. So get ready. Strap in, and here is Damon West. Damon, welcome to the show, brother. Someone's listening to this, they're like, hey, man, I've been living in my own little prison. Maybe I'm carrying some stuff I'm ashamed of, or I'm embarrassed by, or I've just

• 1:24:47Ed Mylett?

  ever, always been invisible, you know? But you got me inspired right now, Damon West, Ned Mylett. I want to do something. I want to leave this prison of my mind, and I want to do something great with my life. And this may be a very basic question, but I think it's an important one. Where do I begin? What would your advice be if I met you at a Starbucks right now, and I said, hey, I heard you on my let's show? Oh, my gosh, I wish you would have asked you at the end, though. What do I do next? What would your answer be to that?

• 1:25:14Damon West?

  I'm gonna give you a story with this answer. Okay. And the answer is you have to surrender this idea of control in your life. You don't control the things you think you control. To illustrate this, I'm gonna tell you one last prison story. People love prison stories. So when I first got into my program recovery, I go to a meeting, Ray is in there. And we start these meetings off with this beautiful prayer called the Serenity Prayer. You've talked about it many times, Ed. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." And so Ray says to me, he says to the group, "We're gonna diagram the Serenity Prayer today." Alright, alright. So he's got a chalkboard behind him. He draws a line from one side of the chalkboard to the other. And he says the first part of the prayer. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change."

• 1:25:58Damon West?

  He said, "Damon, the things you cannot change are on God's line." He said, "A God's line is represented on that chalkboard, but it's bigger than the chalkboard. It goes from one horizon, universal next. That's how big God's line is." And he said, "Every time you try to touch something on God's line, you've hurt yourself and you've hurt other people because you are not God, and God doesn't need your help to do His job." He said, "Stay off of God's line." Then he goes up to the board. He erases an inch off the big line on the board. And he holds his fingers up to the room about an inch apart for everybody to see. He says the second part of the prayer. "The courage to change the things I can." He said, "The things you can change, Damon, are on your line. You get one inch of that big line. That's it. That's the scale, too." He said, "That one inch line is called humility."

• 1:26:43Damon West?

  Because he said humility is being right-sized. And then we were right-sized, then we could be useful to other people, which is the secret to life, to serve other people. He said, "And on your little one-inch humble line that God gives you are the four things you control in life." He said, "God gives you four things on your little line. These are the four things you have control over." He said, "They are exactly what you think." What you say, what you feel, and most importantly, everybody's gonna see what you do, your actions, what you think, what you say, what you feel, and what you do. He said, and what I'm telling you is the world around you, you have no control over the world around you. You control the world within you, between your ears. And he said, the last part of the line was the most, the last part of the prayer was the most important for us addicts

• 1:27:27Damon West?

  and everybody else. Not, you don't have to be an addict for this to be important to you, is the wisdom to know the difference between the big line and the little line. Ed, there's a chapter in my book called Not on My Line. Do you know how many times a day I tell myself, that's not on my line? And I've been sober and I've been out of prison for years, but I remind myself every day, that's not on my line. Now, that's what I would tell people, when you want, you want to have the serenity, you've got to give up this thing, you think, this control of these things, you don't have control over, and then turn your life over to service. And Ed, every single morning, I wake up and I say the same prayer, whatever religion you are, you can apply this to your faith. I get in the morning and I say, hey, God, I ask God for two things. I say, hey, God, put in front of me what you need me to do today for you, and let me recognize that when I see it, because I don't want to miss that.

• 1:28:12Damon West?

  Amen. Bro, that's it.

• 1:28:15Ed Mylett?

  I just want you to know that you met the moment today, brother, in a way that I'm so happy for you.

• 1:28:20Damon West?

  Dude, give me some, man.

• 1:28:21Ed Mylett?

  I'm so happy for you. Like, I'm just sitting here going, God is so good. Like, how he's using you. Guys, like, this is exactly why I started this show, is what we just did right now. Actually, what you just did right now, and what God just did through you. That was a great conversation. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Welcome back to the program, everybody. Today is a special day for me. Like, it's a surreal day because not only is the man to my left a Major League Baseball Hall of Famer, he's got 3,000 hits. He had .388 one year. He's one of the all-time greats in Major League Baseball, but he's been one of the all-time most influential people in my life as a young man.

• 1:29:06Ed Mylett?

  He became a mentor to me. I haven't seen him in decades, and now he's in my living room on my show, which is just gonna be an incredible experience. We're gonna talk about his amazing life. This will be one of those shows where if you're driving, you're gonna pull over because you're gonna lose your breath a few times. About this man's life story, what he's learned, his lessons, and the incredible experience and journey that his life has been. So, everybody, this is Hall of Famer Rod Carew. Rod, thank you for being here, brother.

• 1:29:33Rod Carew?

  Thanks for having me.

• 1:29:34Ed Mylett?

  One other thing I've always wanted to ask you, that baseball's a different sport, and people that aren't fans of every sport, maybe this nuance isn't, you know, obvious to you. But like football, they're gonna play 16, 18 games now. There's a game on a Sunday. We all work towards that Sunday. There's an event, we have it, then there's the playoffs. Most sports are that way. Baseball is a grind. You're playing 162 games in a very short window of time, and there's a grind. There's a, you have to maintain an emotional level of control throughout a season. And most people, a lot of big league players even struggle with that.

• 1:30:08Rod Carew?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:30:08Ed Mylett?

  How did you maintain emotional control through slumps, through ups and downs, through a full season, and then through a career as long as yours as well?

• 1:30:16Rod Carew?

  Well, you know, to me, it wasn't a job. To me, it was just a little boy's game, like Campanello said. Little boys, baseball's a game little boys play. I never can tell you that I've gone through a slump where it has kinda knocked me off my heels and pushed me back. Cause I remember I was, the longest streak I think I had as a hitter, I was 0-for-17.

• 1:30:45Ed Mylett?

  That was your longest slump?

• 1:30:46Rod Carew?

  Yeah, the longest.

• 1:30:48Ed Mylett?

  Four games?

• 1:30:51Ed Mylett?

  I hate you.

• 1:30:54Rod Carew?

  So the 18th time. I dropped a bunt down for a base hit.

• 1:31:00Ed Mylett?

  Made an adjustment.

• 1:31:01Rod Carew?

  I hit a high chopper, didn't leave the infield for a base hit. I dropped another bunt down for a base hit. And I had another high chopper for a base hit. Not one of those balls left the infield. But while I was going through this 0 for 17, I was hitting line drives and they were going right at somebody.

• 1:31:24Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:31:25Rod Carew?

  And.

• 1:31:26Ed Mylett?

  Great lesson.

• 1:31:26Rod Carew?

  So guy says, how do you do that? I says, well, you know, I, I worked on my bunting, so. If I'm not getting hits swinging the bat, I'm going to the next dimension.

• 1:31:38Ed Mylett?

  I love that. I think there's a lesson there, Rod, and I always go back to like, okay, how's this apply to other things? And that it's true in business. We're always trying to hit these big home runs and if you feel like things are slipping, just get some base hits, get a sale, get an account, get some momentum, get in early, make extra phone calls, do the extra email, just lay the bunt down.

• 1:31:56Rod Carew?

  Yep.

• 1:31:56Ed Mylett?

  Get some momentum going because sometimes the slump you're in in business, you're hitting line drives. It's just not the time.

• 1:32:00Rod Carew?

  Right.

• 1:32:00Ed Mylett?

  It's just timing. It's just things are, it's not always you're doing something wrong. Maybe it's just bad timing right now. Keep making adjustments, et cetera.

• 1:32:08Rod Carew?

  And you know, the, the difference about me and other players is I had the six tool.

• 1:32:16Ed Mylett?

  Which was?

• 1:32:17Rod Carew?

  You know, they always say you have the five tools. The six tool was this.

• 1:32:22Ed Mylett?

  Your mind.

• 1:32:23Rod Carew?

  I never let my mind get me in trouble. I stayed positive all, all the way. I knew, yeah, I'm gonna make outs. You know, this is a game that, um, three out of 10 and you're successful.

• 1:32:38Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:39Rod Carew?

  You know, so I'm not gonna worry about days that I don't get a hit. You know, like some guys, all of a sudden it's panic.

• 1:32:47Ed Mylett?

  You're right.

• 1:32:47Rod Carew?

  You know, they, they panic. What am I doing wrong? You see, do you see something? No, you're just hitting the ball good, but you're hitting it right at somebody, so.

• 1:32:57Ed Mylett?

  You think the mental part of your game was the separator?

• 1:33:00Rod Carew?

  Oh, yes, definitely. And I tell kids that today. I says, this is the most important tool. You can do everything else, but if you can't control what's going on up here, things are gonna be tough.

• 1:33:14Ed Mylett?

  1 million percent. By the way, those of you listening on audio, he's pointing at his head. And he's talking about how important the mental part of the game is, maintaining emotional control, not stacking worries and thoughts that get bigger than they need to be. It's amazing to me, I work with a lot of athletes on their mental game, and people will ask me, you know, what are you really working with them when you're, if it's a UFC fighter, or a boxer, or a golfer? And I'll tell them often, the main thing we work on is their confidence. And people say to me, there's no way, confidence at that level of play? Yes, confidence at that level of play is even fragile for many athletes as well.

• 1:33:48Rod Carew?

  That's true.

• 1:33:48Ed Mylett?

  Is that not true? You're in dugouts with guys all the time.

• 1:33:50Rod Carew?

  Oh, jeez. Yeah, and I listen to them talk, I says, hey dude.

• 1:33:57Ed Mylett?

  He's pointing at his head.

• 1:33:58Rod Carew?

  I just point to my head, you know?

• 1:34:00Ed Mylett?

  Yep, 100% the mental side of the game. I wanna ask you about the hardest part, I think probably, of your life, and I could be wrong, but speaking about mental toughness, which is, so guys, this man goes through this heart transplant, he ends up getting the heart from a child he was kind to, it's just bananas. If he's on the second hole, he's gone. He reverts back to the guardian angels of Michelle, and at the time when Michelle was struggling with leukemia, it became another national story. This was not some secret thing, this was something that I was following, that people all across the world, you were getting letters and mail and all these other things. I have to think that during that time, your mental, emotional control was tested the most then. This is not a Major League Baseball game, this is your little girl, struggling

• 1:34:43Ed Mylett?

  and dying, and, and I'm sure in a great deal of pain, and I don't wanna be too personal about it, but there are people right now listening to this that are going through their form of tragedy, a business failure, a divorce, an illness in their family. I just lost my dad recently. What was that time like for you, and what would the lessons and takeaways that you took from it?

• 1:35:03Rod Carew?

  It was easy for me because she brought me into her fold. You know, she knew I didn't talk to the press much. And she knew that. It's gonna be stretching the limit for me to be talking to a radio person or a writer or somebody about what she's she's going through. But when I was checking her into Children's Hospital in Orange County, all these kids were, there were like ten kids out in the hallway kicking soccer balls. They have their poles and they're kicking soccer balls and some of them are wiffle bats and all this stuff.

• 1:35:46Rod Carew?

  And she just walks up to me and she taps me on my shoulder and she says, Daddy, you've got to start talking to the press. See all these kids? Maybe we can save some of their lives. So she she came to me and told me. And I says, okay, honey, I promise you that from today on until the day I die, I will give my full efforts towards helping kids. And she says, you promise me? I says, I promise you. My gosh. You know, because I never spoke to the press that much. You know, I I kind of stayed away from them. And when she asked me to do that, I says, I will.

• 1:36:31Rod Carew?

  I promise you I will. You know, and for all the time she spent in the hospital, I remember that first day when she found out that she had leukemia, when the doctor told her. And she says, well, what do we do? Doctor said, oh, try and clean it up and make you better. She says, okay, let's go. Didn't cry, nothing. Not for the time that she was in the hospital. She did not cry one single day. Not one single day, you know? And the the week that she died, I went down to the chapel and I asked God to take her. He did.

• 1:37:15Rod Carew?

  I says, Father, please take her. She's suffering and I don't want her to suffer anymore. So would you take her and put her in your in your garden? You know, and he gave us another week with her. And then we found a four out of five cord blood that we were gonna use to, instead of the marrow. She couldn't couldn't find anyone with a marrow to save her life. And when she was walking in that room, she said, Dad, I know that I'm not coming out of there alive. She said, Come on, says, God's gonna be with you.

• 1:37:56Rod Carew?

  She says, Dad, I'm not coming out of there alive, and I know that God's gonna be with me. So I'm not gonna worry. Here's a nineteen-year-old kid talking to me like that, to her dad. And I'm like, You're gonna be okay, you're gonna be okay. But she knew, when she went in that room, she knew she was gonna die. You know?

• 1:38:20Ed Mylett?

  Just like you knew you weren't.

• 1:38:22Rod Carew?

  Yes.

• 1:38:22Ed Mylett?

  When you had your heart attack.

• 1:38:23Rod Carew?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:24Ed Mylett?

  What an amazing story. I, uh, you've just honored her so well with your life because you've done, guys, if you just do a simple Google search, you'll see all the tireless thousands of hours Raj put into doing things for children and how you've honored her. You know, little one-on-one things, things at the stadium, like you were talking about. The thing you were doing the night before your heart attack.

• 1:38:46Rod Carew?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:47Ed Mylett?

  Was an extension of the promise that you made to her in the hospital.

• 1:38:51Rod Carew?

  And you know, it's funny, I remember driving down the five freeway. I had gone to Washington and spoke in front of Congress about raising funds for NIH. You know, and then got a call, my agent called me and he says, Guess what? They just passed a fifty million dollar bill for the kids.

• 1:39:17Ed Mylett?

  That's crazy.

• 1:39:18Rod Carew?

  And I opened my sunroof and I says, Honey, thanks so much, we did it again. You know, and that's the way it was. And even today, some nights, you know, I'm sitting at home and I don't have anything to do. I get in my car, go for a drive and says, Pish, how you doing? I used to call her Pish. How you doing? I says, I'm hanging in there and I talked to her.

• 1:39:43Ed Mylett?

  You really?

• 1:39:44Rod Carew?

  You know, yeah, I do it many nights. You know, and.

• 1:39:50Rod Carew?

  It makes me feel good. Yeah. You know, and I'm sure she's saying, "I'm proud of you, Dad. I'm proud of you." I'm sure she is. Keep doing what you're doing. We're doing it right now. Yeah. I'm proud of you. Well, thank you. Thank you so much. You changed my life.