Don’t Borrow Suffering

Ryan talks about why you should not let other people’s negative emotions affect you. Sign up for the Daily Stoic email: http://DailyStoic.com/emailFollow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, and FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. 📢 Share | ⚙️ Manage Subscription

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:05Ryan Holiday?

  Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we bring you a passage of ancient wisdom designed to help you find strength, insight, and wisdom in everyday life. Each one of these passages is based on the 2,000-year-old philosophy that has guided some of history's greatest men and women. For more, you can visit us at DailyStoic.com.

• 0:28Ryan Holiday?

  Don't Borrow Suffering. Here's a line from Seneca: "We suffer more in imagination than in reality," meaning, "we spend so much time worried about how bad things are going to be that we actually torture ourselves more than the thing we're worried about ever could." That is, if it happens at all. This is an interesting tension in Stoicism. After all, isn't Seneca the guy who also said, "We should project our thoughts ahead of us at every turn and have in mind every possible eventuality instead of only the usual course of events. Rehearse them in your mind: exile, torture, war, shipwreck.

• 1:12Ryan Holiday?

  All the terms of our human lot should be before our eyes." Isn't that a contradiction? No, not exactly. Notice that Seneca does not say we should suffer unnecessarily in advance. He says we should rehearse and prepare. He does not say that we should torture ourselves with worry or fear. That's what most people miss about premeditatio malorum, which you can get in medallion form from DailyStoic.com. It's about being realistic. It's not about borrowing worry or pain in advance. It's not supposed to make you paranoid or pessimistic. It's supposed to make you prepared. Bad stuff can happen.

• 1:56Ryan Holiday?

  Bad stuff can happen to us. We need to be aware of that. We shouldn't be surprised by it, but we also shouldn't work ourselves into a state and confuse that worry with prevention or preparation. A Stoic is aware of the possibilities of life and, at the same time, has their head down and focuses on what is in front of them and what's inside their circle of control. Is that complicated and a bit of a balance? Sure, but welcome to life. It's complicated, and you can handle it.

• 2:34Ryan Holiday?

  Thanks so much for listening to the Daily Stoic Podcast. If you don't know this, you can get these delivered to you via email every day. Check it out at dailystoic.com/email.