Off the Record with Dusty Slay: Comedy, Marriage and Breaking Addiction

On today’s episode, John talks with comedian Dusty Slay about comedy, marriage and breaking addiction. Where to find Dusty Slay: 🎥 Subscribe to Dusty Slay on YouTube. 📷 Follow Dusty Slay on Instagram. 😂 Find more from Dusty Slay. Next Steps: ❤️ Get away with your spouse today! 🔥 Reconnect every day. Download the Together app. 📞 Ask John a question! Call 844-693-3291 or send us a message. 📚 Building a Non-Anxious Life 📝 Anxiety Test 📚 Own Your Past, Change Your Future ❓ Questions for Humans Conversation Cards 💭 John’s Free Guided Meditation 🤘🏼 The Dr. John Delony Show Merch Connect With Our Sponsors: Head to Beam and use code DELONY for an exclusive discount—because better sleep, energy and focus start tonight. Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp. Keep your home safe and under control. Go to Cove Smart and use code DELONY for up to 80% off your first order. Get an exclusive offer with code DELONY at Cozy Earth. Get 20% off when you join DeleteMe. Go to Dutch Pet and use code DELONY to get $50 off a year of vet care. Go love your pets! Visit Hallow for a 90-day free trial. Visit Helix Sleep for special offers! Working knives for working people—go to Montana Knife Company to see what’s available now! Explore Poncho Outdoors! Get 25% off your order at Thorne. Explore More From Ramsey Network: 🎙️ The Ramsey Show 💸 The Ramsey Show Highlights 🍸 Smart Money Happy Hour 💡 The Rachel Cruze Show 💰 George Kamel 🪑 Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman 📈 EntreLeadership Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:05Speaker 00

  But when I quit drinking, I was like, I kind of struggled with it a little bit where I was like, "Oh, I'm not really fun now."

• 0:11Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 0:11Speaker 00

  But I'm like, "Oh, why do I have to be fun?"

• 0:15Dr. John Delony?

  I gotta go be this other thing so that I can get your approval, stranger. That's tougher than just not drinking.

• 0:29Dr. John Delony?

  Hey, what's going on? It's time for a special episode of the Dr. John Deloney Show. I am your brother John, and I'm glad that you are joining us on a Saturday morning special episode. All right, so over the last few years, I've gotten more and more people reaching out, asking for more interviews, more conversations with people I find inspiring, who I learned from, who challenged me, or quite honestly, this is me being selfish, people I just love and I want to introduce to you all. And I also get folks who get frustrated when we take calls off the show and insert conversations.

• 1:11Dr. John Delony?

  And so what we're trying is, once a month, a few times a month, maybe every week, we're gonna drop conversations with Deloney. These are interviews, these are conversations I'm having with my friends, with people I look up to, people who inspire me, and I want you to get to know them too. This week, on the inaugural drop, is a world-renowned comedian, he's got two Netflix specials, a class act. His name is The Great Dusty Slay. He's hilarious, super, super insightful, and this episode is just, it's one I've reflected on over and over and over again since we sat down and talked.

• 1:53Dr. John Delony?

  So, I'm gonna leave all of his contact information in the show notes. You can follow him on social media, you can go check out his latest Netflix special, Wet Heat, or you can get his tour schedule. So buckle up, do what you gotta do this Saturday morning and beyond, and listen to a conversation with my new friend and all-around philosopher and incredible comedian, The Great Dusty Slay.

• 2:20Dr. John Delony?

  So going back about a year ago, my buddy George Kamel, he just always like, "Dude, I want to do stand-up. I want to do stand-up. I want to do stand-up." And finally, out of an act of protest, I call over and say, "Hey, me and George want to book a night at the lab." And the deeper thing, and this is kind of dramatic, but it's true. My dad and I have always struggled to connect. But growing up, he was an old, like, he still is, he was an old Texas cop. And so we didn't have a lot of connecting points, but he always talked with reverence about Pryor and Steve Martin and Robin Williams and Cosby before, right? And it was, it was like a, "These are the, like, this is what art is," right?

• 3:05Dr. John Delony?

  To a guy that had no, like, didn't have an art aesthetic. And so I've always had this connection, like, "I wonder if he would like me then," right, my dad, right?

• 3:12Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 3:12Dr. John Delony?

  And so, anyway, we booked a night and then we added a second one and it wasn't great. It was fine. It was fine. But then I got obsessed. And so then I started going down, it's right by my house, and so I started going every week, as much as I possibly can. And my day job is traveling the country and doing these big corporate events, like, for mental health and relationship stuff. But I got obsessed with going in these rooms. And two things I've figured out. One is, I did not understand the level of craftsmanship that goes on backstage. When you ask somebody, "Hey, can you help make this thing better?" Or when you have somebody that's, like, you would get off-set and they're like, "Dude, you had a space. If you'd held that space," and you're like, "Okay."

• 3:56Dr. John Delony?

  But I've started to look at you professional comics as, like, craftsmen, like, as cabinet makers, who are, like, trying to make something amazing. And the second thing is, and this is just a compliment to you, there is an ethos that I'm now finding, the more I'm around touring comics. That it only exists in a few places, which is the established comics like you and who come in and say, this is how we treat people in these green rooms. And this is how we take care of new people. And this is how we're kind. This is how we hold people accountable. Man, that's there's you're like one of the the godfathers that hover around this this place. And I'm not finding out now that I just happen to be down the street from one of the best places in the country for that. But I just want to say thank you for creating

• 4:40Dr. John Delony?

  a world where a guy like me can walk in and there's a room of what I feel when I go there of total support and total like, that wasn't great, but it's not said like, to make me feel better. It's to say like, hey, you can do better than this. Or here's a thing you like, does that make sense? And so on behalf of all people who get the courage to stand up in front of people and say, who are going like this, and they're like, make me laugh, like, thank you for being a leader in that world. Because it's it's it's it's very impactful for me.

• 5:10Speaker 00

  Well, I appreciate that. Yeah, I mean, comedy is so great, right? I've always said this, like, if you live in a town and you just go to an open mic, like, you're like, I want to do comedy, you go to an open mic. Even if you're not good at comedy, if you just keep showing up and sitting there and watching the other comics, you're eventually gonna make friends and you become part of this community. And it's like, the open mic community is really great. I don't want to do open mics anymore. I've done plenty of them. But it's like, you come up in this community, and then you all become friends, because you're like, you're suffering together, you're bombing together. And and then, you know, as long as you like, you know, get somewhat good, you'll get booked on other shows. And I love the comedy community.

• 5:54Dr. John Delony?

  It's it's but you've created you've helped create a pretty special one here in Nashville, which is awesome.

• 5:58Speaker 00

  Yeah, I mean, I love that, too. I mean, I still got other ideas that I were I was just meeting with, you know, one of the owners of Zany's last night about a new idea that I have to kind of help make the scene better.

• 6:10Dr. John Delony?

  That's so cool.

• 6:10Speaker 00

  And I love it. I love to see like, it's like, when you're part of these showcases, and then it's like, everybody's good, it makes everybody better.

• 6:19Dr. John Delony?

  That's it. That's it.

• 6:20Speaker 00

  Because if the person that goes before you really crushes, and then you're next, you're like, well, I want to, you know, I don't want to bomb.

• 6:26Dr. John Delony?

  That's right. That's right. I want to do good. And you think about it all day. I had this moment, you just said something powerful, and this is what it's given to me. I would say equal to any good counseling I've been to, which is having shared experiences with people who are quasi on your team. Now, there is competition. You want to like, like you did the best tonight. Like, that feels good, right?

• 6:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:47Dr. John Delony?

  But there's something powerful about trying something and it not working with people who are pretty much on your team. I had this experience. I did an event in Denver. It was a big corporate event and it wasn't, I wasn't a comedian at all. It was all mental health stuff. But on that bill was like me and John Maxwell, Nate showed up to do a set, Dave Ramsey, like these big icons. And then there's, it's one of those you walk in the green room, you're like, what am I doing here? Right? I did, did my hour and it, it wasn't up to what I wanted. I came home and I was already texting when I got off the plane. Like, I gotta go up at, do 10 minutes and get back on the horse, right?

• 7:27Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 7:28Dr. John Delony?

  At Zany's. To say I bombed, dude. It was a, it was disastrous.

• 7:35Speaker 00

  Your 10 minutes when you got back?

• 7:37Dr. John Delony?

  Oh, gosh. It was catastrophic.

• 7:39Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 7:40Dr. John Delony?

  And these are things that I know work, so I knew it was me, right? I walk off and this comic named Tina Fremell from New York, she was backstage, and she put her hands on my shoulders and she said, "Now you're one of us." And the whole room started laughing, not at me, but with me.

• 7:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 7:56Dr. John Delony?

  And it was like, "Oh," and I drove home with a huge smile on my face. Cause it, I don't know how to describe this other than I failed in front of people and in front of people who were kind of on my team, and it was freeing. It wasn't the opposite. Does that make sense?

• 8:08Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 8:09Dr. John Delony?

  I was free. I drove home, I smiled. Like, my wife's still gonna like me. I still got a one bed to sleep in. My kids like me. Like, I'm, I'm free now.

• 8:15Speaker 00

  And bombing, uh, watching my friends bomb that I know, uh, can do, like are good at comedy, is one of my favorite things.

• 8:23Dr. John Delony?

  In the world.

• 8:24Speaker 00

  Because it's so funny to see your friend that's really good go up and bomb. You're like, this is hilarious to me. I don't know why it's happening, but it's funny.

• 8:33Dr. John Delony?

  We have a mutual friend, us the other night was just like, "Okay, how about this? For this next joke, don't laugh, just clap if you think it's funny." It was just not going well. And dude, that was the funniest. Anyway, there's something about trying something terrifying and scary.

• 8:48Dr. John Delony?

  In front of people that you know, again, are kind of on your team and having it not go well. And how freeing that is.

• 8:54Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 8:55Dr. John Delony?

  When all of our life is built to not have ever let anybody see any scars. And it's like, no, you got them. It's just, it's, it's, it's.

• 9:01Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:01Dr. John Delony?

  It's purifying.

• 9:02Speaker 00

  And you bomb together, you know, it's like, and that's what I was saying, like, uh, someone crushes before you. Because it's like, if you're all bombing on a show, then you're all just sharing in it. And it's easy to go, well, it's the audience.

• 9:15Dr. John Delony?

  Of course, dude, yeah.

• 9:16Speaker 00

  But if someone before you crushes, you go, all right, well, they will laugh.

• 9:21Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 9:22Speaker 00

  You know, and it's like on my show the other night, what I was saying, it's like, the audience was great. But they were one of those that they really laughed if the joke was funny. And if it wasn't, they didn't laugh.

• 9:32Dr. John Delony?

  And you came off and you said, this audience is fair.

• 9:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:36Dr. John Delony?

  And that's like, that's cool. That's awesome.

• 9:38Speaker 00

  I do, I did some shows, you know, sometimes my Zany shows like this, but Denver Comedy Works, the downtown club is like this. Where you go and they're almost laughing at every movement that you make on stage.

• 9:49Dr. John Delony?

  Yes.

• 9:50Speaker 00

  Like I did.

• 9:51Dr. John Delony?

  Which is intoxicating.

• 9:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:52Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 9:52Speaker 00

  I did five shows in Denver, maybe six. And it was my last show of the weekend where they were just like, they were just laughing at my jokes. Right? Which is all you're really asking for. But because they had been giving it up all weekend over any little thing. Now that they're just laughing at the punchlines again, I'm like, well, what's happened?

• 10:13Dr. John Delony?

  Oh yeah, I'm no good at this.

• 10:14Speaker 00

  Why? You don't like me now? What is it? You like the jokes, but not me?

• 10:18Dr. John Delony?

  So how important is it to be anchored into something? And we'll get into some of the, the deeper parts of your life. How important is it to be anchored not in that end result? Cause I look across this, like, I, did I get the bonus this year? Is my marriage top notch? Did my kid win the little league thing? This feels like the same thing. If I'm anchored to that outcome. Man, this can be a gnarly business that you're a part of.

• 10:44Speaker 00

  Yeah, I think you just gotta have some balance with shows, right? It's like, I like to do corporate gigs, I like, you know, because corporate gigs pay well. I like that sort of thing, but they're not always the best shows for your ego.

• 10:55Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 10:56Speaker 00

  So I like, you know, I feel like as long as I have enough good shows, I can handle doing those shows.

• 11:03Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 11:04Speaker 00

  Right? But if I did corporates every night and they were like pretty mediocre, I think it would, it could get to you.

• 11:10Dr. John Delony?

  That would erode.

• 11:10Speaker 00

  Cause I have some great corporates. They're not all like that, but I have some I walk into and I go, alright, I'm about to crush this. And then you get up there and you're like, oh. You, you tell your, your new jokes and you go, well, maybe the new jokes are just not as good. And then I start going back to some classics that always work. And then they're not getting laughs and you're like, alright. But as long as you have that balance, where you're, where you're doing enough good shows, you can say to yourself in those moments, you can go, alright, they're not ju-

• 11:38Dr. John Delony?

  This is y'all.

• 11:39Speaker 00

  They're just not gonna be into anything I do. So you can relax in that. Where you go, alright, it doesn't matter. We're just, I'm just making money, I'm gonna do my best, but I am just making money here.

• 11:50Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, and it maybe they're not laughing because they're sitting by their boss and they don't like, who knows what the dynamics are, yeah.

• 11:54Speaker 00

  But it's like, I had a show, I did a show in California at a theater and it was like one of my lowest turnouts at a theater that I'd had. But the, the people that were there were really into it. So I was like, this is a blast. And then I, I was making jokes about people not being there. I go, oh, every time you do a show, people always go, oh, well, you know, it's, you know, you're in the south and it's college football. And I'm like, yeah, but it's a Friday. And they go, well, high school football, you know? I was like, there's always something. And then they go, somebody yelled out, high school graduation. I go, yeah, anything, anything you wanna pick. But turns out in that town, they said that actually was the city's high school graduation.

• 12:37Speaker 00

  So people, you know, and I don't know, if you're a superstar, people skip the graduation.

• 12:43Dr. John Delony?

  That's right, that's right.

• 12:44Speaker 00

  But, uh, you know, but there are, it's just as long as there's a balance, right? To where you're like, uh, cause to me, as long as the shows are going well and I'm like paying my bills, I'm happy.

• 12:55Dr. John Delony?

  You have a good life, yeah.

• 12:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 12:56Dr. John Delony?

  So tell me about, um- How old were you when you got married?

• 13:01Speaker 00

  Thirty-five.

• 13:02Dr. John Delony?

  Thirty-five. I'm fascinated by this question. Thirty-five, you're making your way, I'll call you successful in this business. Why would you choose to go get married?

• 13:14Speaker 00

  Well, it's interesting for me because there's a, there was a, I believe, I always quote this and I don't even know if I've ever heard him say it. But someone told me that Doug Stanhope said, you know, the thing about marriage, he's like, oh, this is going pretty well. Why don't we get the government involved? Right? So I kind of felt like you could be biblically married without government married.

• 13:35Dr. John Delony?

  Okay.

• 13:35Speaker 00

  Right?

• 13:35Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 13:36Speaker 00

  Uh, and I, I always felt like, is there really a need for me to get married?

• 13:40Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 13:40Speaker 00

  You know? But my wife is Canadian, right? And so we started dating and she moved here on a work visa for entertainment. She was, you know, doing comedy with me.

• 13:49Dr. John Delony?

  Okay.

• 13:50Speaker 00

  So we were traveling around doing comedy and then we got to a place where we were pretty close to her visa expiring. So I always think this is like one of the most unromantic, but also one of the most romantic things. Whereas like I had to ask myself, um, you know, either I can get married or I can let my girlfriend have to go back. And it's not like she's going back to a third world country. She's going back to Canada. Uh, so I'm like, do, you know, do I love her enough to get married? And I'm like, well, yeah, of course I do. So.

• 14:27Dr. John Delony?

  So what was your picture of marriage growing up?

• 14:30Speaker 00

  Well, my, uh, my dad has been married four times.

• 14:34Dr. John Delony?

  Okay.

• 14:35Speaker 00

  Uh, my, and he's, you know, his, his latest marriage is, you know, 20 years.

• 14:39Dr. John Delony?

  Okay, yeah.

• 14:39Speaker 00

  Um, and I think, you know, his wife is great.

• 14:42Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 14:44Speaker 00

  No, my dad's great.

• 14:45Dr. John Delony?

  Sure, of course, of course.

• 14:46Speaker 00

  But, and, and then my mom was married twice, uh, and, and then divorced. So, uh, you know, both of my sister, my older sisters, uh, you know, my, I think my, you know, she's, one of my sisters has been married pretty close to 40 years at this point. But, uh, they're, you know, but as far as my parents go, I just did not see successful marriages growing up.

• 15:08Dr. John Delony?

  And you've talked a lot about, we don't have to go down the road, but about growing up in a trailer park.

• 15:12Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:12Dr. John Delony?

  And all the shenanigans that went along there.

• 15:14Speaker 00

  Yeah, I mean, you just don't see, you know, I don't know, I just didn't see this whole idea of marriage and, you know, I don't know, I think about like, I never thought of my childhood as bad or unhappy, but, you know, I would have to, you know, go, you know, summers, I would spend a week with my mom, then a week with my dad, then a week with my mom. So I missed out on a lot of like summer hangs because they, my dad lived in a different town, not far away, but far enough away to where kids I went to school with would be like, why don't you come over to my house this weekend? And I'm like, no, I can't, I'm at my dad's.

• 15:47Dr. John Delony?

  At my dad's, yeah.

• 15:47Speaker 00

  And then even, you know, in the school year, be one weekend with my mom, one weekend with my dad, so. And then like just these whole idea that you would choose between your mom and dad. So I, I'm like, when I decided to have kids, I'm like, I never want my kids to have to go through that. Like they should never have to choose who they're gonna hang out with.

• 16:08Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 16:08Speaker 00

  You know, Christmas, do I do Christmas? Like even to this day, as an adult, it still affects my life.

• 16:14Dr. John Delony?

  Of course.

• 16:14Speaker 00

  Where when I go holidays, I go, am I gonna spend it with my mom or with my dad? And I've tried to bring them together, they can get along just fine, but it's weird for me.

• 16:24Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 16:26Dr. John Delony?

  I'm fascinated by that because I can look at all of like the nerd stuff about marriage that it, if you do marriage well or great,

• 16:35Dr. John Delony?

  everything in your life improves. And if you do it not well or bad, every, it's like reverse ROI, like everything in your life gets worse, right? And so I'm in this weird dilemma where I want to encourage, I got a 15 year old and one of my wife and I's goals is, let's make being married a thing that it wouldn't occur to him not to do. Like I want to be a part of this thing that looks so fun and rad and whatever, why wouldn't I do that thing, right? And so that's, that's well and good, but I'm looking at a whole generation of people. Like what is it? Sixty, the, the numbers are wild, right? What was it in your head that switched that said, I'm gonna do this thing and I want this? I don't have a good picture of what this will look like. I don't have a good lived experience.

• 17:20Dr. John Delony?

  I'm gonna, I want this to look different. And again, there's no throwing shade at parents. Every, every parent has a thing, but, but there's some point when you have to say, okay, you and your wife have to be intentional about this thing has to look different. And how do you go about doing that?

• 17:33Speaker 00

  Well, you know, um, you know, we didn't, we had talked, when me and my wife first started dating, I was like, like not for having kids.

• 17:42Dr. John Delony?

  Yes.

• 17:43Speaker 00

  And I even like, kinda like talked to her about it early on, like, I don't wanna have kids. So if you're going into this with me, you have to be on board with that. But then we kinda like together, decided that we did wanna have kids. And yeah, so it's like, I don't know, I think it's that. I think it's having kids. Like when my daughter was born, it was just like, a real life-changing thing. Like, I, you know, I was with my wife the whole time she was pregnant, obviously. And I knew it was real, but it wasn't really real until, until the baby actually comes out and you go, whoa, there's a human being in there.

• 18:21Dr. John Delony?

  And it's on me.

• 18:21Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 18:22Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 18:22Speaker 00

  Then I'm like, I don't wanna mess up my, my kid's life. I don't want my kid to have a hard life. Not that I don't want them to have to deal with things, but, uh, you know, I don't want them to have, the hard thing, I don't want them to be that, you know, their parents are bad or,

• 18:38Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 18:39Speaker 00

  their parents have made their life harder.

• 18:41Dr. John Delony?

  How is that real? But there is still real stuff that happens. Like, like, there's dishes that gotta be done and there's people who are tired and there's the flight miss. Like, there's life that happens to all of us. How do you and your wife navigate that? Without a model, without a picture? Cause that's, that, that is the, that to me is the secret sauce, right? It's like, if, if we can communicate that, that you don't have a good picture of this thing, and it's still worth it, and here's how to do that. And I can get real nerdy and academic about it, but I'm fascinated by people who are like, no, we're gonna do this thing, we're gonna do it right. But then there's like the brass tacks, like, somebody's gotta do the laundry.

• 19:19Speaker 00

  Yeah, well, I think that you can, you can, um, look at, Things and say, well, I know what I don't want it to be. Right? Rather than having a model of what what it should be, you can go, well, this is what I don't want it to be. You know, and I'm like.

• 19:35Dr. John Delony?

  And that informs your next move, right?

• 19:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 19:37Dr. John Delony?

  Okay.

• 19:37Speaker 00

  And so you're like, you know, I, I, I don't know. I went to a public school and I feel like my education was good. I had a good time, but I feel like things are different now.

• 19:46Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 19:47Speaker 00

  And if it's in my control, I don't want my daughter to have to, you know, my kids to have to go to the same kind of school I went to.

• 19:54Dr. John Delony?

  Yes.

• 19:54Speaker 00

  Even though, again, my school was great.

• 19:57Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 19:57Speaker 00

  But it is a different, things are different.

• 19:59Dr. John Delony?

  Of course, yeah.

• 20:00Speaker 00

  You know?

• 20:00Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 20:01Speaker 00

  So I just want to try to get them, you know, like the kind of education that they enjoy, that, that, that makes them feel good. Like, my dad always was like big on me getting good grades, but my dad would also kind of like make fun of me about reading.

• 20:16Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 20:16Speaker 00

  And stuff. Like, like, you know, my dad would talk about, you know, stories about him being cool and not ever doing his homework and stuff. But wanted me to do my homework.

• 20:28Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 20:28Speaker 00

  But also didn't want me to be a nerd or, you know, so I'm like, you're not really encouraging me the way that you think you are.

• 20:37Speaker 00

  You know?

• 20:37Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 20:38Speaker 00

  And, and it's like, and then like, even like, uh, you know, playing guitar. I remember I wanted to take guitar lessons in, in school. It was a class for guitar. And my dad was like, I remember my dad saying this to me and I, and I think he's right on, on a certain level, but, but way off on another. He goes, you know, you're, he said, you don't have the year for guitar, you know? It's like these people that play guitar, they pick up the guitar and they can just play. And I go, and now looking back, I'm like, well, of course there are people, Dwayne Allman, Jimi Hendrix probably picked it up and knew how to play right away. But there are other people who just learn.

• 21:16Dr. John Delony?

  Right.

• 21:16Speaker 00

  To play guitar.

• 21:17Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 21:18Speaker 00

  But I feel like my dad saying that to me implanted it in my head that I can't play guitar. Therefore, I it discouraged me in a way that I never took the time to learn. Now, I can't blame my dad my whole life that I never played guitar. But I think at that young age.

• 21:35Dr. John Delony?

  Just phoom.

• 21:36Speaker 00

  So I'm like, well, I don't want to do that to my kids.

• 21:38Dr. John Delony?

  Okay.

• 21:39Speaker 00

  If I, you know, if they want to do something, I want to encourage them to do it. Now, I don't anytime my daughter says, I want to do this, I don't want to run right out and buy everything. You know, but it's.

• 21:49Dr. John Delony?

  I have that temptation, though.

• 21:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:51Dr. John Delony?

  I do.

• 21:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:52Dr. John Delony?

  I want to be like, okay, cool. What if like, we're the nicest of? And my wife's like, no, no.

• 21:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:57Dr. John Delony?

  A thirty dollar target guitar is fine. She doesn't need a thousand dollar tailor.

• 22:00Speaker 00

  Right.

• 22:00Dr. John Delony?

  Like, right? Yeah, yeah.

• 22:01Speaker 00

  Yeah, if if she.

• 22:02Dr. John Delony?

  That's my impulse.

• 22:03Speaker 00

  If she learns to play, yeah.

• 22:04Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 22:05Speaker 00

  But that's that's my thing. Like, you know, I was looking at a hundred and twenty dollar guitar, I think, something like that.

• 22:11Dr. John Delony?

  Well, and and I think that is things that I've found myself saying, and my wife will cut her eyes like, yeah, we're not a math family. And or we're not good at.

• 22:23Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 22:23Dr. John Delony?

  I'm not good at, which is me telling my son, you're probably not good at this either. Instead of saying, I struggle at this and I didn't put the work in on this.

• 22:31Speaker 00

  Right.

• 22:32Dr. John Delony?

  This wasn't a priority for me. It can't be for you. Even that little sentence is a difference of, I guess, I guess I won't touch this thing.

• 22:38Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 22:39Dr. John Delony?

  And going back to like, there's something about just showing up over time, you'll get better at a thing, right?

• 22:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 22:46Dr. John Delony?

  Or even even the ROI of like, if you want to play guitar, well, you're never going to make it as a musician. There's a big gap between like, I'm never gonna have a Netflix special for comedy. But showing up every night makes me have new friends, that lets me have new friends, lets me succeed and fail together. And it makes me better at my day job, which is just articulating things better in a meeting, right? I mean, there's.

• 23:10Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 23:11Dr. John Delony?

  You can play guitar and woo a girl at a campfire. And that doesn't mean you have to go be John Mayer, right? There's a gap between that.

• 23:17Speaker 00

  Right.

• 23:18Dr. John Delony?

  And.

• 23:19Speaker 00

  Yeah, and even just challenging your mind.

• 23:22Dr. John Delony?

  That's it.

• 23:22Speaker 00

  To learn a thing.

• 23:23Dr. John Delony?

  Learn a new thing.

• 23:24Speaker 00

  Helps you in some other level.

• 23:25Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 23:26Speaker 00

  And that's what that's what I'm all about. Like, I want, I'd like to homeschool. Now, I know a lot of that's going to fall on my wife, so I think that's why she's kind of against it.

• 23:35Dr. John Delony?

  You're spoken like a great husband.

• 23:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 23:37Dr. John Delony?

  What I would like to do.

• 23:38Speaker 00

  But I I want, I just feel like that a lot could be, you could learn all the academic things in a shorter amount of time than school. And and but, you know, I'm not saying better or worse, but you could learn it all. And a shorter amount of time than school, but then you could also spend other time learning other things.

• 23:55Dr. John Delony?

  That, yeah.

• 23:56Speaker 00

  You know.

• 23:56Dr. John Delony?

  That you were really lit up by, right?

• 23:58Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 23:58Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, dude.

• 23:59Speaker 00

  You know, and I think you could, you know, if you don't, you know, if you have the finances, if your kid's struggling in this, you could hire a tutor to to teach them.

• 24:09Dr. John Delony?

  Sure.

• 24:09Speaker 00

  You know, and I think there are people out there trying to do all that. And it's just like, that's what I want. I just want my kids to like, feel like they can do whatever they want to do and really explore things and learn things about themselves.

• 24:22Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 24:23Speaker 00

  And not be discouraged because their dad is like, well, yeah.

• 24:27Dr. John Delony?

  I can't do that, yeah.

• 24:28Speaker 00

  What, when you said that, that really hit me when you said, we're not.

• 24:32Dr. John Delony?

  Of this family.

• 24:33Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 24:33Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 24:34Speaker 00

  Where it's like, maybe I wasn't.

• 24:37Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 24:37Speaker 00

  But they can be.

• 24:39Dr. John Delony?

  One step removed. So my dad's a policeman. We, we, we didn't have any money growing up, none. And

• 24:47Dr. John Delony?

  there's been some tension in my family. Now that my life looks different financially, we live in a different neighborhood than I did growing up. And they, my parents have never said this. I know they're proud of me and all that, but there, I feel a tension of, have I forgotten my raisin? Like, oh, why don't you just, or when the check comes, I guess I'll, you know what I mean? It's like, there's this kind of automatic default. How have you handled the balance of

• 25:14Dr. John Delony?

  growing up where you grew up and in the way you grew up? Again, not bad. It just was a certain, certain, certain culture and community to the life you have now. Where you're on TV, like you're selling out theaters across the country.

• 25:28Speaker 00

  Well, I think that it's, uh.

• 25:29Dr. John Delony?

  You're driving a car that starts every time you turn it on, right?

• 25:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. Well, I think that it's, uh, it's been slow, so you kind of adjust to each level, right? But I, I also think it's just important to do, still do normal things, like, because you know, there's a tendency, like, we moved houses and then I have a bigger yard. And then I didn't have, I only had a pushmore and I was like, we were getting, and then the people that we bought the house from go, hey, this was our lawn care guy. So I call the guy and he's like, yeah, we can do it. And then, and I go, well, I just want to do it for a little while. And then, and then I'm gonna start doing it. And then, you know, this guy comes every two weeks and cuts the grass. And you go, that's pretty nice. I don't have to cut the grass.

• 26:11Dr. John Delony?

  He's like, he's like a weed dealer. He's like, I just seen it this one time. He's like, alright, cool. I'll see you next week.

• 26:16Speaker 00

  And I'm like, well, I like cutting grass. But he keeps coming, cutting the grass. And I go, wow, I don't have to cut the grass. And I think that if you allow enough of those things, you become completely out of touch. To, and then you don't do anything where I'm like, I want to keep doing things.

• 26:31Dr. John Delony?

  Yes.

• 26:32Speaker 00

  I don't want to hire people to do everything. Now, I know there is that thing of when you hire people to do things, you're helping them have jobs.

• 26:38Dr. John Delony?

  Sure.

• 26:39Speaker 00

  And everybody has jobs. And that's great. But I want to do regular things.

• 26:44Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 26:44Speaker 00

  You know?

• 26:45Dr. John Delony?

  I've got a small, I don't call it a farm, but a small little, and it's, it's a thing that I will go mow that place. And I'm finding that those four hours of driving that zero turn mower and the three hours of weeding, like, that's actually almost therapeutic for me. But it re, because there's a part of this that's not real, right? And there's something real about that. Grass grows and the seasons change. And there's something, something important about that, or doing my own laundry.

• 27:12Speaker 00

  What I like, I, because I have some land in McMinnville, and I got a zero turn there, and I go cut that. And it's nine acres, but a lot of it's wood. So I'm not cutting nine acres. But, you know, you're riding, I like to do no headphones. Just me listening to the lawnmower, driving along for hours.

• 27:29Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, it's meditative.

• 27:30Speaker 00

  It is so good.

• 27:31Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 27:31Speaker 00

  I love it. You think of things, or, or you think of nothing.

• 27:35Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 27:35Speaker 00

  You just watch what you're doing.

• 27:37Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 27:37Speaker 00

  And it's so great.

• 27:38Dr. John Delony?

  You let your brain off the hook a little bit, huh? Is there, is there, and you don't have to get into this if you don't want to, we can cut this out. Is there tension with family and your success?

• 27:50Speaker 00

  Actually, my family has been so great.

• 27:52Dr. John Delony?

  Really? That's awesome.

• 27:53Speaker 00

  My, uh, we went to, some family members came to visit me the other day, and we went out to eat. And they were talking about going to see Brian Bates show. And they said, we tried to buy shirts from Brian, and he wouldn't let us pay for anything. And they've been to my shows, and I charge them for shirts.

• 28:15Speaker 00

  And, and, and I go, well, Brian's a nice guy.

• 28:18Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 28:19Speaker 00

  That's why he's not a good businessman.

• 28:20Dr. John Delony?

  He's a real Christian guy, that's right.

• 28:21Speaker 00

  I said, he's not a good businessman.

• 28:23Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 28:23Speaker 00

  And I kind of made that joke.

• 28:24Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 28:25Speaker 00

  Uh, and it was funny, but you know, now I do give them free tickets when they come to shows, you know, uh, but when it was shirts, I mean, I was like, I, I always felt weird about charging them for shirts, but I had my bag that was there and there was a good probability I was gonna sell out the bag.

• 28:41Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 28:42Speaker 00

  And I'm like, it just feels like it's messing up my thing if I give the, cause in my mind, it's like, you don't have to have this shirt.

• 28:50Dr. John Delony?

  There you go, yeah.

• 28:51Speaker 00

  This shirt's not food.

• 28:52Dr. John Delony?

  Right.

• 28:52Speaker 00

  You don't have to have this. And if you want it, well, you know, let's, let's buy it and.

• 28:59Dr. John Delony?

  I, I had a guy recently, I found out he had bought, he's a buddy of mine, he bought my book. I went to Amazon and bought it. And I was like, why'd you do that? And he's like, this is how you know, is are you the friend that will support your friend? Or are you the friend that when your buddy gets it, then you try to milk it, right?

• 29:19Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 29:19Dr. John Delony?

  And tickets is, that's easy. That's all that kind of stuff's easy. But there's something about those, that hard ass set that's like, oh, you're really in my corner. Because it meant, it meant you got to participate in your buddy's success by putting 20 bucks down and having somebody mail you that book. Like that was, you get to participate in this. Instead of, hey man, hey man, hey man. Yeah, I get that.

• 29:39Speaker 00

  Yeah. And it's like, my, my family's great. I mean, they've never, um, you know, I've had plenty of tensions with my family, but it's never over anything like that. I used to drink a lot and I think a lot of my family, uh, and I, well, friends too, thought I was much more fun when I used to drink.

• 29:56Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 29:57Speaker 00

  And it is true. I was a more fun person.

• 30:00Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 30:01Speaker 00

  But I don't, it, I don't know. I just feel like I'm like, I don't have to be fun. You know what I mean? Like, I feel like there's this thing where we feel like we have to be fun. And I'm like, I don't know why I have to be fun all the time. People invite me out after shows and I go, I go, you just saw the most fun version of me. It gets way less fun after this.

• 30:25Dr. John Delony?

  It's funny, people come stay in our house. And I've had that exact like, oh, y'all just go to bed at nine? And I'm like, yeah, I'm exhausting to be around. Like, it's exhausting to be in my skin. I want to go to bed and read a book. And I think people think there's gonna be a disco ball at my house. Like, when we get home, it really gets kicks off and they're like, no, dude, I'm not fun.

• 30:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:42Dr. John Delony?

  I'm kind of a drag, actually.

• 30:44Speaker 00

  Well, yeah, and I used to, when I used to drink, I mean, I was all about it. I didn't, I didn't like, I drank a ton.

• 30:50Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 30:50Speaker 00

  But I didn't drink alone. I wanted to go out. I wanted to go out to the bar and be around people and drink and party. And that was fun. But when I quit drinking, I was like, I kind of struggled with it a little bit where I was like, oh, I'm not, not really fun now.

• 31:03Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 31:04Speaker 00

  But I'm like, oh, why do I have to be fun? Where is it anywhere that says we need to be fun?

• 31:11Dr. John Delony?

  Well, it's, it's less even that. Like, there's the fun, there's the, this, whatever it is, this alcohol, this whatever drug. It makes me a tougher version of myself or a sharper version. Like, there's something beneath that, which is the version of myself that is real isn't enough. It's not good enough.

• 31:29Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:29Dr. John Delony?

  I gotta go be this other thing so that I can get your approval, stranger. Right? Or five people who just came to my thing and wanna, you know what I mean?

• 31:39Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:41Dr. John Delony?

  That's tougher than just not drinking. Like, what you just said is a really powerful shift in, I'm okay with me. How do you get there?

• 31:51Speaker 00

  Right.

• 31:52Dr. John Delony?

  That's the nightmare. Because we talked, you talk to people who struggle with alcohol. Alcohol's not the problem. Alcohol works. Alcohol's awesome. It works. It gets you what you want. People who cheat on their wives all the time, people who like any, put any vice down, that thing helps. The real issue is, I don't like being me in my skin and I need to be somebody else so that I can feel okay.

• 32:11Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 32:12Dr. John Delony?

  That's the nightmare.

• 32:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, I mean, you know, and, you know, two things for me, uh, religion, I guess you could call it religion. I mean, I'm Christian. I mean, I don't really go to a church, so I don't know if it's religion. You know? Uh, it's, but it is.

• 32:27Dr. John Delony?

  Relatively Christian.

• 32:28Speaker 00

  Christianity, it is Jesus. I'm not just a spiritual person. Um, and then, um, you know, comedy. I mean, those two things, when I quit drinking, it's like when I quit drinking, I was reading my Bible all the time. And I almost stopped doing comedy. I was like, I was just kind of hobbyist anyway. And then I was like, I don't know, maybe I don't even need this. And then I, but I kept doing it. And then I was like, I found that I really enjoyed it and actually liked it more.

• 32:55Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 32:55Speaker 00

  When I wasn't drinking.

• 32:56Dr. John Delony?

  Huh.

• 32:56Speaker 00

  But then finding, you know, confidence in that, you know, I'm good at comedy. It helps. And then you're like, oh, okay, I don't have to be these other things to people. I can just be a comic and know that I'm good at this.

• 33:12Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 33:12Speaker 00

  And then I get laughs that way. So I don't need to get laughs everywhere I go in my life.

• 33:17Dr. John Delony?

  But where does that root grow from?

• 33:20Dr. John Delony?

  That's tough. Is it all faith? Just this sense that I'm loved by something bigger than me and I'm good?

• 33:25Speaker 00

  Yeah, I think so. And then it's like, you know, you kind of realize that, you know, while you do need things while you're on earth, it's like, they don't really matter.

• 33:35Dr. John Delony?

  Huh.

• 33:35Speaker 00

  It's like, I like that I've made money. I like that I have fun things and a car that starts every time.

• 33:42Dr. John Delony?

  All right.

• 33:42Speaker 00

  But if I were to be back to a place where I didn't have those things, I think I would be okay.

• 33:49Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 33:49Speaker 00

  And maybe in some ways even happier because you have less things to worry about.

• 33:54Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 33:54Speaker 00

  Like when I lived in apartments and a storm was coming through, I wasn't worried because I'm like, this is not my apartment. You know what I mean? If a tree falls, all right, who cares?

• 34:03Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 34:04Speaker 00

  But when I first moved into a house, I had this giant tree in my backyard and the wind would just whip this tree around. And I'm like, that tree's going to crush my house. And then every storm, I was worried about this tree crushing my house.

• 34:16Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah. And then even when there's not a storm, it's always like, I probably need to get that tree removed. It's just this little voice like, I probably need to get that tree cut down. I don't want to cut that tree down.

• 34:24Speaker 00

  I love that tree.

• 34:25Dr. John Delony?

  I wonder how much that tree costs? It costs five thousand, I'm not cutting that tree down. And it never stops, yeah, till the next storm, right?

• 34:30Speaker 00

  Huh.

• 34:30Dr. John Delony?

  There's a rooting there that is so powerful. And I hate to throw it all back on religion, which I think is a, that's, that's a root for me, which is like, none of this matters. Right? And when I can open my hands to that and underneath the nothing, this doesn't matter as much as.

• 34:51Dr. John Delony?

  I'm loved whether I fail at my job or I don't have a good year or you're like you and I are together. We're a hundred percent commission, right?

• 34:58Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:59Dr. John Delony?

  We're small business people, basically.

• 35:01Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 35:01Dr. John Delony?

  Like if I don't have a good year, I still have intrinsic value and that's okay. And in a weird way, that has freed me to rappel off even further down. I don't know. I, I, I have found a similar thing. It makes me better, but there's something about comics too, that it's a daily interaction with failure that I think our whole culture tries to insulate us from.

• 35:19Speaker 00

  Yeah. And also, um, you know, with even like going higher in comedy, like, you know, like, uh, let's say like Hollywood, that sort of thing. Like it's like, yeah, I go to LA and I take meetings and I'm like, if things happen, great, you know? But if they don't happen, it's okay. I have comedy. I, I still like what, and I'm not, you know, I'm not mad at anyone. I go take meetings. I'm not nervous in the meetings. I'm not like, oh, I, I really need this. I go, if this happens, great. But if it doesn't, that's okay.

• 35:52Dr. John Delony?

  My kids love me and my wife likes me most of the time.

• 35:56Speaker 00

  Yeah. My kids would probably like it if I didn't get this because I'll be home more.

• 36:01Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah. That was a hard thing for me to wrap my, it took me years with my oldest. Like he doesn't want anything but me. And I think I got to the level where it took me a long time to believe that. You know what I mean?

• 36:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:15Dr. John Delony?

  He's only gonna like me if, almost like you're like, if I'm cool or if I'm the like, he doesn't care. He doesn't know any different. He's just like, you're my dad.

• 36:25Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:25Dr. John Delony?

  Can we shoot each other with a water hose and play with mud? Like I just want to do whatever you're doing. I want to do that. And that's, dude, that was hard for me.

• 36:31Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah. Well, I feel like that, I don't know. I spend too much time thinking about things, but it's like, you know, you, you look back at like grandfathers, even great grandfathers. They were like around in war, war one. And then, you know, then you have war, war two, and then you have like, I don't know, the great depression was somewhere in between there or before. So it's like, you have all these like great grandparents and grandparents growing up in these really hard times.

• 36:57Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 36:58Speaker 00

  And oftentimes, probably not that nice to their kids because their lives are hard.

• 37:03Dr. John Delony?

  Right.

• 37:04Speaker 00

  So then the next generation may be a little nicer to their kids, but their lives are still hard. To where you get to like, kind of the baby boomer generation that takes so much flack from everyone all the time.

• 37:16Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 37:16Speaker 00

  Uh, you know, but it's like, you know, who knows what their parents were like, like I know. Like I have relatives that have abusive parents, you know, and then.

• 37:26Dr. John Delony?

  Of course.

• 37:26Speaker 00

  And then you go, and then you find out that their parent was like more abusive than them.

• 37:32Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 37:33Speaker 00

  And then how far does it go back to where it's like each year or each generation, they're like a little less abusive.

• 37:39Dr. John Delony?

  Right, yeah.

• 37:40Speaker 00

  So it's like, it's still abusive, but to the abuser, they're like, well, you should have seen what I was getting.

• 37:46Dr. John Delony?

  Right, yeah.

• 37:46Speaker 00

  Right, to where we're now like, you know, we're dealing with our parents and whatever they had to deal, you know. So I feel like we're all like in a way getting a little better, like maybe softer, but like a little better.

• 37:59Dr. John Delony?

  Well, and there is that tension. I, I remember talking with a veteran and it maybe it was World War II or World War I. When they said this, it never occurred to me. They said, there were no deployments. You didn't let good deploy for nine months. You went overseas and fought until that was over.

• 38:15Speaker 00

  Oh, wow.

• 38:16Dr. John Delony?

  Maybe a year, might be two years, might be three, like you came home, if you lived, when the fighting was done. And to now where I'm like, hey, I need to sit my son down, like I'm going to miss three months from now. I'm going to miss this cross country meet because I have a thing, man. I'm really, I'm letting you down. You know what I mean?

• 38:32Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:32Dr. John Delony?

  It's always like that. You're good, man. You know what I mean? And it's this, I don't know. I think there's a, there's a. The way I can get you to buy something is if I make you feel guilty. And I think that's a great. It's a great marketing move to get me to need to buy everything for my kids and to do everything for my kids because I'm not enough. Whereas, yeah, if you just go back three generations or two, one generation. They're gonna be fine.

• 38:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:58Dr. John Delony?

  They're gonna be fine. And in fact, listening to my son retell the story without me telling him what I saw and what, how he could have moved different, him retelling it is awesome too, right?

• 39:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 39:07Dr. John Delony?

  It's just, I don't know. I don't, I don't know there's a place where I'll ever exhale and say, I'm doing this great. You know what I mean? And that's, that's, that's the nightmare of being a parent, I guess.

• 39:16Speaker 00

  Yeah. And who knows? I mean, and it's like, if you're like me, you follow a lot of Instagram channels where everybody's giving advice. And then if you take all the advice and combine it all, you're like, oh, I can't do anything.

• 39:26Dr. John Delony?

  Nothing.

• 39:27Speaker 00

  Because I can't, if I eat this, it kills me.

• 39:30Dr. John Delony?

  If you don't eat that, it'll kill you.

• 39:31Speaker 00

  Right. And then if you're doing this workout, or if you're on this, or if you're running wifi, I talk about wifi all the time. People think I'm crazy because I turn off my wifi at night at home and people go, oh, what are you, some kind of weirdo? And the guy who brought my wifi box from the company on the pamphlet, it was like, you know, causes reproductive harm or cancers on their own pamphlet.

• 39:57Speaker 00

  And now I'm crazy for saying it.

• 39:59Dr. John Delony?

  Right, right, right. Yeah.

• 40:00Speaker 00

  And I'm like, you know, so you just try to stay away from all these things. And I wanna, I don't want my kids addicted to

• 40:06Dr. John Delony?

  Screams.

• 40:06Speaker 00

  The phone, the way that I'm addicted to the phone.

• 40:09Dr. John Delony?

  Totally.

• 40:09Speaker 00

  And I didn't even grow up with a phone and I'm addicted to it.

• 40:12Dr. John Delony?

  No, it's, it's the most public, public cocaine offering ever, ever handed to all of us.

• 40:17Speaker 00

  That's why I have to go outside and do things.

• 40:19Dr. John Delony?

  Yes, yeah.

• 40:20Speaker 00

  Because if I don't, I, I'm on my phone. I'm like, it's so hard to be off my phone. But if I get outside, I'm cool. I'm hanging, I'm breathing fresh air. I got sinus thing going on right now from all the fresh air.

• 40:32Dr. John Delony?

  That's an important thing for folks who wanna stop a thing. I wanna stop drinking. I wanna stop looking at pornography so much. I wanna stop being on my phone all the time. I wanna stop, whatever. Is stopping something is good, but there's a value in, what's the replacement for that?

• 40:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:46Dr. John Delony?

  And like. Cool, stop drinking, great. That was feeling something, so what are you gonna, what, what positive thing? And maybe it's just going to bed, dude. Maybe it's just getting a, a small gang. Maybe it's, I need to stop being on my, on my screen. Are we gonna just like, turn it off and just sit there and like white knuckle it? Or what positive thing can you do?

• 41:06Speaker 00

  Well, that's a hard thing for me on the road, right? When I'm home, I can find plenty to do to not be on my phone. But when I'm on the road, I'm in a hotel.

• 41:14Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 41:14Speaker 00

  And I'm like, what am I supposed to be doing?

• 41:16Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 41:16Speaker 00

  What am I supposed to do? I, I, you know, I got, I smoke cigars sometimes.

• 41:19Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 41:20Speaker 00

  I'm like, but is that good? You know, and I, I'm like.

• 41:22Dr. John Delony?

  I started getting tattoos in every town I went to. That was a terrible idea.

• 41:25Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 41:26Dr. John Delony?

  Right, but it was like, I don't wanna go to bars, I mean, that's gonna be stupid. I, I gotta do something.

• 41:30Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 41:30Dr. John Delony?

  And, yeah, that's always a, a difficult challenge.

• 41:33Speaker 00

  What do you do? What do, you know, and I, I bought a, I was gonna start carving wood. I bought a little wood carving. That didn't go far, it didn't go any further than me buying the wood carving set. I was gonna be whittling in the hotel room.

• 41:46Dr. John Delony?

  So, we live in a culture that has, most households are dual households. People are both working. And it's not every household, but almost everyone. And, this is, we can extrapolate this out to every, every family here. But, this one's a personal question for me. I write, part of my life is writing books. And I work for a place that's got its own publishing machine, right? And it can get books out everywhere in the world. My wife, who was Dr. Deloney before me, way smarter, she's an infinitely better writer, also writes. And, she has a rule, I can't post about her books, I can't put it out there. She wants this to be hers.

• 42:31Dr. John Delony?

  And, at the end of every year, when we sit down and say, who sold the most books? Like, the metric that the world says matters. Like, there's tension there, right? And, you used to be on the road with your wife. Y'all both did comedy. How have y'all navigated? And, and again, this is, I'm a writer, that not everyone listening, very few people listening to writers or comics. But, there is the-

• 42:54Dr. John Delony?

  He works in construction and she's a nurse, or she works at a law firm and he does whatever. There's always that competitive tension. How have y'all navigated that in your house?

• 43:06Speaker 00

  Well, um, you know, my wife quit comedy, uh, which was, um, uh, good in a lot of ways, uh, because she didn't really like working the road. Uh, and so she kind of wanted to quit, but she was an actress before we met. She did stuff in Canada and she, she'll, she, she likes that aspect. Um, but when she quit comedy, she, she was off the road for a couple of years and that's when we decided to have kids. So it worked out well for us, but I think there is still a thing.

• 43:37Dr. John Delony?

  She still have ghosts about that?

• 43:39Speaker 00

  Well, she, yeah, a little bit. She'll do Instagram and she's very good at that. Um, in a lot of ways, she's more driven than me to, to create. She's always thinking of ideas, but it kind of takes over for her. Whereas I'm like, I don't know, I feel like I'm pretty good. I'm at a good place with comedy to where I can just write on stage. I just go to the club, I'm right on stage and it just doesn't obsess my mind.

• 44:03Dr. John Delony?

  I've seen you do that and I will never understand. Like walking out with nothing and letting it go.

• 44:08Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 44:08Dr. John Delony?

  That's such a gutsy move.

• 44:10Speaker 00

  Well, it's, it, over time, it's built up that way. I was never like that. I wasn't like that for a long time.

• 44:15Dr. John Delony?

  It's amazing to watch.

• 44:16Speaker 00

  But, um, I feel like, you know, when we used to travel together, it was really hard. Because, you know, my wife would open for me and, you know, if she didn't do well, uh, you know.

• 44:27Dr. John Delony?

  But you did well?

• 44:28Speaker 00

  But I did well, it'd be hard for her. And then if she did well and then I didn't do well, she would get mad at me and she would go, you gotta do better. Yeah. If I'm gonna be opening for you, you gotta do better.

• 44:39Dr. John Delony?

  Do you have marriage advice for folks who one person's in a season of blessing and one is not?

• 44:46Speaker 00

  Uh, you know, I don't really know. I'm not, I'm not really one for marriage advice too much, but I just think that, you know. When it comes to marriage, it's like you gotta like agree on on things, you know? And it's like if if, you know, one is more successful than the other, then I just feel like you gotta ride that out. You guys gotta go, hey, you know, you're making the money. Uh, I'm gonna support you and and you both gotta stay grounded and not think that, um, you know, it's just you.

• 45:19Dr. John Delony?

  I always have to come back to if my wife is winning, we're winning.

• 45:23Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 45:23Dr. John Delony?

  And if and that's easy to put like stitch into a pillow or put on a Hallmark card. The reality that's tough, or I gotta be able to say, I'm jealous that her book is a hundred times better than mine.

• 45:34Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 45:35Dr. John Delony?

  And and my wife's very similar. She loves the act of getting up and writing. It's a nightmare for me. It's a thing I have to do. And then I'm a part of a machine. So the thing that I hate the most about my job pays our bills.

• 45:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 45:51Dr. John Delony?

  And the thing that she craves and loves, right, doesn't isn't as markedly successful. But um, it's that if I have a wife that's creative and is it is actively involved in a project, our whole house, that flows through our home. We're all winning, right?

• 46:07Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 46:07Dr. John Delony?

  Even if that means on certain months, I'm doing more dishes or I'm doing more laundry or I'm doing taking the kids or doing more bedtimes or whatever and vice versa, right?

• 46:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 46:16Dr. John Delony?

  But I that's the only way I can make make sense of it.

• 46:18Speaker 00

  Well, you know, I mean, there there's like.

• 46:21Dr. John Delony?

  Once you start competing in your house, I think that's that's a that's a bad road to go down.

• 46:24Speaker 00

  Yes, for sure. Because I, yeah, I mean, it's all about like, it's all about teamwork.

• 46:29Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 46:29Speaker 00

  Right? I mean, and I like, you know, I like that my wife's at home. I really enjoy it. I mean, I, you know, I'm I'm all about her doing other things, but I I think, you know, my dreams of uh, raising a family and having all the, they don't work without my wife, you know, without everything that she does at home. It doesn't work without her, you know? I can't, I can't go make money for our family the way that I want to without her. I don't trust anybody. I don't trust anyone with my kids. So without my wife, none of that works, you know? So it's like, yeah, I may be, you know, on the poster, I may be on Netflix, I may be uh, on the marquee, but without my wife, none of it works. I'm not able to do it.

• 47:11Dr. John Delony?

  I'm like the little light bulb in the in the lighthouse.

• 47:15Dr. John Delony?

  But man, she's that whole tower that thinks that's, that's the way this is my house.

• 47:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 47:19Dr. John Delony?

  None of this happens without that, yeah.

• 47:20Speaker 00

  Yeah, I mean, and it's like my kids get raised the way that I want them to be raised and it's like, and, and the way that she wants them to be raised. And we have beautiful kids and they're, uh, you know, well minded most of the time.

• 47:33Dr. John Delony?

  Our kids.

• 47:33Speaker 00

  Yeah, and, uh, but it's like, it doesn't work without my wife. And it's like, that's more important to me than comedy. I mean, comedy is great. I mean, it's provided a good life for me, but it's more important that, you know, we have a good family and our kids have a good life.

• 47:48Dr. John Delony?

  What do you tell the 28 year old man or woman who's listening to this and who has said, and, and, and honestly, it's like, it's almost a math problem. Like, A plus B plus C equals, I don't want to have kids financially, relationally, like sexually. I don't, it's just gonna, I, I can see the algorithm where this blows up everything that is my life. I don't want to do that. On this side of it, what would you tell somebody?

• 48:15Speaker 00

  Well, you know, it's like, people, uh, I feel like people that get married later in life like I did, uh, say, I wish I'd done this 10 years ago.

• 48:26Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 48:26Speaker 00

  And then people who do it 10 years.

• 48:28Dr. John Delony?

  That's almost every, yeah, I wish I'd waited, yeah.

• 48:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, they, but, I mean, to me personally, I, I, I wish that I had just had, uh, you know, kind of people around me, like guy, that, that, I don't think people knew and just intentionally didn't guide me. I think I just didn't have the right people around me. But I wish that there would have been somebody that could really talk to me about drinking and, and, and given me some direction in life and saying, hey, this kind of road that you're on, it doesn't lead anywhere.

• 48:59Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 49:00Speaker 00

  Cause I have a few jokes about drinking that are very funny, but I could have wrote those jokes in drinking for two years. I didn't need to do it for 10.

• 49:08Dr. John Delony?

  A decade, yeah.

• 49:09Speaker 00

  Yeah. And, and I could have got started on things a lot sooner. I could have had kids at 25 rather than, you know, 39.

• 49:18Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah. Do you build, do you beat yourself up over that decade? Or do you give yourself some grace over it?

• 49:23Speaker 00

  I, you know, it is what it is, so I don't really beat myself up. But I do wish that I, I could have got started sooner.

• 49:30Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 49:30Speaker 00

  And I, that's what I would say. I mean, it's like, people, so many people are like, well, I want to live my life a little bit before, you know, I, I get locked down or whatever. And I would say that that is life.

• 49:42Dr. John Delony?

  This isn't, yeah, the the substit- and I'm like, the substitute what wasn't life.

• 49:48Speaker 00

  Right. And it's like, you know, the the men around me, and I don't mean like my my dad and I just mean men that I would work with that were older men were giving me such bad advice.

• 50:01Speaker 00

  They might have thought it was good advice, but they would be talking about marriage and they're like, oh, you're gonna get, you know, you'll get married one day and it'll just be one woman for the rest of your life. So just explore the field, you know, and I'm like, well, that's the worst advice you could have given.

• 50:15Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 50:15Speaker 00

  Because, you know, it's like there's a Ecclesiastes verse, I think it's uh, chapter seven, verse six, or it could be the opposite, but it says, "All man's efforts are for his mouth, yet his appetite is never satisfied." It's like, there's, there's no amount of like, sinning that you're gonna do that one day you go, all right, that's good.

• 50:37Dr. John Delony?

  That's right.

• 50:38Speaker 00

  I did it. I'm satisfied now. Let's get, get into a wholesome life.

• 50:43Dr. John Delony?

  Huh.

• 50:44Speaker 00

  You know?

• 50:45Dr. John Delony?

  And.

• 50:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, you're just gonna have mental scars.

• 50:49Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 50:49Speaker 00

  That, that, then you're like, oh, if I just followed the biblical way and just did the way that, that God wanted me to live my life, then I, I would be on a much better.

• 51:02Dr. John Delony?

  Trajectory.

• 51:02Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 51:03Dr. John Delony?

  Huh.

• 51:03Speaker 00

  But I feel like this, this way, and I, I watched a guy recently, I, I wish I knew the video, but it was a YouTube video. It came out like four or five years ago, but just suddenly popped into everyone's algorithm. But he was just talking about what the nineties did to us. And then he goes through all the movies and what it was teaching us and all the music videos and what it was teaching us. And I love the nineties, but when you look back on that stuff, you go, oh, you were.

• 51:29Dr. John Delony?

  Just pre-programmed.

• 51:31Speaker 00

  Programming me to be a degenerate.

• 51:35Speaker 00

  And then when I was out here, just, you know, drinking and getting high and people go, what are you doing? And I go, well, this is what I've been programmed to do. You know, and it's like, it's just a waste. I'm not saying it's not fun, but it's a waste.

• 51:50Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah. I, it, one of the most revealing moments of my life was I had a group of guys, we got together every Monday night and we were like degenerate good guys, right? Not great, but, and then his name was John. He had got, he came and announced that he was pregnant. First one of my kids, first one of my bodies to have a kid. They have the kid and within two months, he's not hanging out with us anymore. And I, his wife's a gr- one of my greatest friends in the world, but I went to, gosh, he's the worst, man. He has one kid and he can't even go out anymore. Months, months, a couple of years later, I have my kid, my first kid.

• 52:32Dr. John Delony?

  And we were out one night and I said, hey, it never occurred to me you weren't hanging out with us. Not because your wife was saying, but because you would rather sit on the couch and hold this tiny little lump of a human that you'd made. And I was like, why didn't you tell me? And he smiled and he goes, because you wouldn't have, you wouldn't have heard it. I, I, there's nothing I could have said that would have made sense to you other than, oh, I'm done playing video games with these idiots. I'm gonna be here. You know what I mean?

• 52:56Speaker 00

  I know exactly what you mean because

• 52:59Dr. John Delony?

  It's hard to explain it.

• 53:00Speaker 00

  I had so, so many friends that had kids way before me. I mean, one of my best friends, his daughter, my oldest daughter's four years old. His oldest daughter's 17, right? They had them way before me. When I finally had a daughter, I apologized to so many of my friends.

• 53:17Dr. John Delony?

  I have two also. Yeah.

• 53:18Speaker 00

  I just go, I'm so sorry, guys. I had no idea. It was this thing of like, we used to say it all the time. Oh, he's whipped. His wife, his wife just runs his house. He, he can't do anything. And then you get married and you have kids and you go, oh, I, it's not that my wife won't let me do anything. I just respect my wife. I love my wife. I wanna hang out with her.

• 53:41Dr. John Delony?

  Well, yeah, it, it never occurred to me, uh, This is a couple of years ago when I learned the single greatest predictor of a great marriage is are y'all friends? And I remember being like, oh, I could work on that. And then when there's like a pile of wet towels, if my buddy Todd comes to my house, if you came over and you left five cans of, I guess you're not drinking, so of Sprite on the counter, I wouldn't go into an existential tailspin about what is Dusty trying to tell me? What is he, what is he trying to, I would just pick the cans up.

• 54:13Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 54:13Dr. John Delony?

  And the next time you're over like, dude, pick your cans up and pass the nachos, right? But for some reason, my wife does it. I'm like, what is she, what is she trying to say? It's like, bro, she's my friend. Pick up the cans, you know, and go on about your life. And when I realized like, oh, we could make a friendship to where I'd rather just hang out here. And I can't do the math. I can't tell my buddies like who aren't married or whose marriages are struggling like, I'd rather watch Matlock next to her with my long leg hairy legged 15 year old son next to me than, or it's even hard for me, honestly, to tell 30 year old me, hey, there's this event, 3,000 people want to pay money to come see you talk. I'd rather go to that soccer game at nine a.m. with my girls, my daughter's soccer game.

• 54:56Dr. John Delony?

  My 30 year old me is like, what are you talking about? We've dreamt about this. And it's like, yeah, but this actually is kind of more awesome.

• 55:03Speaker 00

  Yeah. Well, uh, yeah, I mean, I go through that all the time. Like I'll get an offer, uh, to go to LA and do a thing and I go, I don't know, guys, I got a lot going. I, I'm gonna, if I do that, then I'm gone this weekend and then I'm in LA all week and then I'm gone next weekend. And it'd be nine days I'm not home with my kids. I don't want to do that.

• 55:24Dr. John Delony?

  And, and for 30 girl me, I feel like he's just yelling in my head like, what are you talking about? You finally get, it's like, yeah, it's just a weird thing.

• 55:31Speaker 00

  Yeah. But that thing about your, your buddy, uh, that's so real for me. Whenever a buddy of mine would get married and have kids and I'd go, oh, what a loser. Like it's so sad for you. What are you just home on a Friday night?

• 55:46Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 55:47Speaker 00

  And now I'm like, well, yeah.

• 55:49Dr. John Delony?

  With the, my best friend on the planet. Yeah.

• 55:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 55:53Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, that's awesome.

• 55:53Speaker 00

  You didn't want to get kicked out of the bar with me?

• 55:57Dr. John Delony?

  You want to tell the same football stories again?

• 55:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 56:00Dr. John Delony?

  And go like recreate Chappelle clips at a, over bad nachos? Yeah, you're good. And I like those things actually. And I also am not prepared, I wasn't prepared for, there is some times when I'm sitting at a soccer game and I'm like, I wish I was on the road right now. And that's okay too, right? There's, there's some times that I'm like, I can't hear the same Wolf Dragon story again. You know what I mean?

• 56:25Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 56:25Dr. John Delony?

  I think I'm gonna run down and do a set down the street or I'm gonna go call my buddy and go, like there is that too. And there's, that's also a real part of being a parent, right? It's not all, I love it all, but it's.

• 56:36Speaker 00

  I mean, I tell my kids to go play. I go, go play. What are you doing?

• 56:40Dr. John Delony?

  I'm not a, I'm not a real life, uh, video game for you.

• 56:43Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 56:44Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah. Go be bored. Yeah. What, um, we'll wrap up with this. And if, I don't mean to end on a heavy note, but

• 56:53Dr. John Delony?

  if you could be a fly on the wall at your funeral, what would you want your daughter?

• 57:00Dr. John Delony?

  When she's reading the eulogy, she writes about you, what would you want her to say? Cause there's gonna be comics in the room being like, one time, and then there's this, but then she walks up. What would you want her to say about my dad, Dusty?

• 57:14Speaker 00

  Well, um, yeah, I mean, that is a heavy question. Well, but I, you know, I think I just want her to know that, uh, you know, that I was there for her, uh, when she needed me to be there and I, I cared about her and I spent as much time with her as I could. And, um, yeah, I mean, I think that just being there for someone and just caring about their life.

• 57:37Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 57:38Speaker 00

  Uh, and, and, uh, because, you know, it's like, I wanna believe that I can just give my kids, uh, advice and then they just take it. And then they never have problems because they go, well. My dad lived through this and now he has the experience. So what he told me matters. So I'll just not make any of my own mistakes because my dad already made them all for me.

• 58:02Dr. John Delony?

  Right.

• 58:02Speaker 00

  I'd like to believe that, but I know that's not a reality necessarily. Now, I think you can take, you know, you can take some advice, but people are still gonna make their own mistakes. But yeah, I mean, I'd like for her to say that, yeah, my dad um uh made me important in his life. That I was important to him and that he was there for me.

• 58:26Dr. John Delony?

  Having my, yeah.

• 58:30Speaker 00

  My son too, for that matter.

• 58:31Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, forget him. He's fine. Boys are on their own. Yeah.

• 58:33Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 58:34Dr. John Delony?

  Having that, yeah, dang. I like that. Having this idea that like my kid knew.

• 58:42Dr. John Delony?

  That's home base.

• 58:43Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 58:44Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, that's it. There's always a door I can walk through.

• 58:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, you know, there's a John Anderson song called Wish I Could Have Been There. Uh, you know, and he's just talking about all these moments that he missed with his kids because he had to work. And he was a truck driver. He probably didn't have any other options in this song.

• 58:58Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 58:58Speaker 00

  But I always think about that and I'm like, well, I want to be there.

• 59:02Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah.

• 59:02Speaker 00

  When I can't be there for everything because there's gonna be things that I miss. Uh, regardless if I'm a comedian or if I'm, you know, I work at Lowe's.

• 59:11Dr. John Delony?

  Window washer. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 59:13Speaker 00

  Uh, it's gonna be things that I miss, but you know, I want to be there for things.

• 59:17Dr. John Delony?

  But there's something also, some of the research says about being there is the intensity of the time, not the volume of the time. And so that's like when I do get off the road, when I do get off the air, do I walk home with my phone open? Do I walk home and immediately whip my laptop out or put the TV on? Or when I'm with them, am I with them, right? And that's a, that's been a powerful shift for me too, which is why I take full laser focus of the time I do have.

• 59:42Speaker 00

  Yeah. I mean, I for sure struggle with that, but I.

• 59:45Dr. John Delony?

  I do too, yeah.

• 59:46Speaker 00

  But I I do try to like, I don't know, I read a thing where it's like, if you're on your phone and your kid comes up to you, just immediately respond to them.

• 59:54Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 59:55Speaker 00

  Even if you end up going back to the phone, just immediately respond to them.

• 59:59Dr. John Delony?

  That's right. Make eye contact and say, hey, I'm finishing this.

• 1:00:01Speaker 00

  Maybe I read that from you, but.

• 1:00:03Dr. John Delony?

  Pretty sure I wrote that.

• 1:00:05Speaker 00

  I mean, I do follow you on Instagram and I might have read that from you.

• 1:00:08Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:09Speaker 00

  But um, uh, but yeah, and I've been trying to.

• 1:00:11Dr. John Delony?

  That was a failure, right? I was like, my daughter's like, dad, dad. I'm like, hold on, hold on. And I could have just put it down and been like, I need two seconds to finish this and then I got you. And that's a, it's just a way to treat somebody with dignity, right?

• 1:00:22Speaker 00

  Yeah. And I read that and uh, yeah, I mean, I've been, I've been exercising that now.

• 1:00:28Dr. John Delony?

  That's awesome.

• 1:00:29Speaker 00

  Where I'm like, yeah, I mean, it's like, cause it's like, when I was growing up, like my dad would read the paper, my dad would watch TV, my mom would watch TV. It's like, we're all, it's just the technology's changed.

• 1:00:40Dr. John Delony?

  That's right.

• 1:00:41Speaker 00

  Right? But the, you know, so it's like there's, people are still doing things the same way they always did, but now it's different, but the phone can suck you in.

• 1:00:49Dr. John Delony?

  Oh, man, yeah. And I didn't think about that. We're mad about this eye contact, but most of us grew up behind this.

• 1:00:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, right.

• 1:00:57Dr. John Delony?

  There was, I couldn't even see your, your torso.

• 1:00:59Speaker 00

  Yeah. I mean, I call my dad now and he still has the volume on a hundred and ten on the TV.

• 1:01:06Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:01:06Speaker 00

  And I'm talking to him and he's watching something.

• 1:01:08Dr. John Delony?

  Yeah. What?

• 1:01:09Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:01:12Dr. John Delony?

  Well, dude, um, thank you for coming on and I want to say thank you for just, I get to see you behind closed doors and thank you for being kind to me and thank you for being hospitable and welcoming. And for being a good coach, like teaching me how all stuff works. Um, and man, I think right now in the times we live in, there's a reason comedy has had such a wild resurgence. And I think it's because like, real comics are the last truth tellers. But more importantly, what people desperately, more than anything is, can I just be in a crowded room of strangers and have a shared human experience? Can I have one hour where I can just laugh?

• 1:01:53Dr. John Delony?

  And it's uh, it's that, there is no greater pharmaceutical need right now in this country than, can we put the phones down and go, you literally have to put your phone in a bag and just have a shared moment with strangers. And somebody just tell us the truth for a while.

• 1:02:09Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:02:09Dr. John Delony?

  Thank you for doing that.

• 1:02:10Speaker 00

  Well, thank you.

• 1:02:11Dr. John Delony?

  It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a holy, and I don't see that in like the cosmically religious, is a holy gift in this current world we live in right now.

• 1:02:20Speaker 00

  It is amazing. I mean, like, um, I don't mean what I do, but I mean, this, this comedy thing is like, you, sometimes I, you know, um, you know, meet people after the shows and it's just like, I'm not gonna say it's a wide variety of people, but I have a variety of people. And, uh, I have a wide variety of ages.

• 1:02:40Dr. John Delony?

  Yes.

• 1:02:40Speaker 00

  I do have, and, um, it's pretty awesome to see that just people, like, that's why, that's what I always tell people about my show. I don't necessarily recommend kids to come because I do have some adult subjects. Uh, nothing dirty, but it's a.

• 1:02:54Dr. John Delony?

  I let my kids go, you're, it's good.

• 1:02:57Speaker 00

  But I, I, it is something that, you know, if you're like, uh, in your twenties and you wanna bring your parents to the show, you can bring them and laugh together at my comedy and it's gonna be fun. You're not gonna be embarrassed that you brought your aunt to my show.

• 1:03:11Dr. John Delony?

  No.

• 1:03:11Speaker 00

  And that's what I think is fun. I've had a lot of people tell me that, that they, they, they've been able to bond with this family member or this family member over my comedy. And that's why I don't talk politics because, you know, first off, probably no one wants to hear it from me. But it, it also, it's just another, like ESPN used to be one of my favorite things, but it's, I think it's.

• 1:03:31Dr. John Delony?

  It's all politics.

• 1:03:32Speaker 00

  Yeah. It's so, and I'm like, sports used to be this thing where you're like, you just watch baseball. It doesn't matter what you look like, who you are, you just, you enjoy baseball, but now everything. Uh, has some social justice angle to it.

• 1:03:45Dr. John Delony?

  You can just come in a comedy room and just.

• 1:03:47Speaker 00

  And that's why comedy, yeah.

• 1:03:49Dr. John Delony?

  Have a shared experience.

• 1:03:50Speaker 00

  Hear me talk about how I make stupid small talk choices, you know?

• 1:03:55Dr. John Delony?

  I'll say this, the other night after your show, I went home, my son is an obsessive, uh, Garth Brooks fan. And I called him and my wife in and I was like, have y'all listened to this song? I won't, I won't ruin it because that's a great bit. Uh, people need to see that live. And my wife was like, yeah, it's an awful song. And I was like, I didn't know that. And my son was like, what do you mean? And we just walked through the lyrics together and we're all like, oh gosh. It was awesome, man, it was fantastic.

• 1:04:19Speaker 00

  Well, thank you. I mean, I, I've been trying to work on that bit for a long time, years.

• 1:04:24Dr. John Delony?

  It was a home run.

• 1:04:25Speaker 00

  Yeah, thank you.

• 1:04:26Dr. John Delony?

  It was a home run.

• 1:04:27Speaker 00

  I've been working on that bit now, I'll put it to the side and then.

• 1:04:29Dr. John Delony?

  No, it's back, it's back.

• 1:04:31Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:04:31Dr. John Delony?

  And the, I don't want to get too nerdy, the way you split, it could have been this, or it could have been this.

• 1:04:38Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:04:39Dr. John Delony?

  That was the entry point and that was perfect.

• 1:04:42Speaker 00

  That's the new angle that's helped it to come alive again.

• 1:04:45Dr. John Delony?

  Awesome, could be this. Well, dude, thanks for being my friend, I'm grateful for you, brother.

• 1:04:50Speaker 00

  Thank you.