How To Live Longer (The TOP FOODS You Should Not Eat) EP 1389

https://lewishowes.com/mindset - Order a copy of my new book The Greatness Mindset today! Thomas DeLauer is a Nutritionist and Expert in Diet, Cognitive Nutrition and Performance. He is motivated by a guiding ethos of integrated optimization: if you perform better, so does the world. Thomas reaches more than 15 million viewers monthly (on average) through his Youtube channel, where he translates experience and learning from his own health transformation utilizing intermittent fasting and other forms of nutrition into actionable steps for his dedicated community of 2.85 million subscribers. In this episode you will learn,The right and wrong way of fasting. Simple mantras that will help you change your relationship with food. The number one cause of insulin resistance. For more, go to lewishowes.com/1389The Most Inspiring Story About Mindset & Perseverance You’ll Ever Hear w/ Nick Lavery: https://link.chtbl.com/1359-podJames Clear Habits That’ll Help You Not Waste Another Year Of Your Life: https://link.chtbl.com/1372-pod Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:03Lewis Howes?

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• 0:30Thomas DeLauer?

  And in a world where more and more and more and more of us are becoming insulin resistant, that's a very important thing to be paying attention to. Anything that's going to skyrocket blood glucose where you're not coming back down the way that you should is a recipe for disaster in life.

• 0:44Lewis Howes?

  Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin.

• 1:08Lewis Howes?

  My main goal of this conversation is to give people tools to help them optimize their health, their wellness, nutrition, and overall their life. And I think a lot of it starts with understanding which foods to eat and which foods to never eat. You lost over 100 pounds. You've got under, you know, I think it's 8% body fat now. You've had the worst of foods. You've had the best of foods. What should we never eat if we want to stay healthy and really extend our lives and living longer?

• 1:36Thomas DeLauer?

  Sure. And with this, we can almost divide it into two categories, right? There's the evidence-based category, where we have research from the last few decades. The problem that I sometimes have with evidence-based is although it's the best and sort of the concrete, is it moves at a little bit of a slower pace than everything else, right? Like we start looking at, okay, well, what are we seeing in newer research that might not be evidence-based or might not be epidemiological data yet, or it's just observational data? But it's one of those things where we can still look at basic things and start to get ideas. So the other category is of course more, I don't know anecdotal or what we see in observational stuff or rodent models. But I'll start with like the number one, I think that almost everyone agrees on, and

• 2:21Thomas DeLauer?

  that's trans fats.

• 2:22Lewis Howes?

  You should never eat trans fats.

• 2:24Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, with trans fats, there is so much data demonstrating that trans fats are related to visceral fat. Trans fats are related to endothelial stress, like all these different aspects that are just inflammatory for the human body. And trans fats you're gonna find in most of the regular peanut butters, right? Anything, if you look at a label and it says...

• 2:44Lewis Howes?

  Oh man, but I love peanut butter.

• 2:45Thomas DeLauer?

  Well, it's not over, right? You just have to look at the label.

• 2:48Lewis Howes?

  Just don't, with the added trans fat, don't have those.

• 2:50Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, if it says partially hydrogenated anything, right? And what that means is they've basically taken a fat that would normally be a liquid at room temperature, and they add a component to it. They basically add additional hydrogens to it to turn it into a saturated fat, so that it's shelf-stable. So at first glance, it's like, okay, this is great. It's allowing things to be shelf-stable for a longer period of time, until you realize that you've completely artificially manipulated a fat to be something else that the body, quite candidly, doesn't know how to deal with properly. And that's the one thing, is like across the board, whether you're a low-carb advocate, whether you're a calories-in, calories-out person, whether you're an intermittent, it doesn't matter what category you're in, you can be vegan, it doesn't matter.

• 3:33Thomas DeLauer?

  Trans fats, I haven't seen any way around it where you could position those as good. Okay, and when you start looking at what that does as far as an inflammatory response within the body, like that's probably the biggest piece we need to be paying attention to. What can we do to eliminate these kinds of things? And that kind of just umbrellas into a category of anything that's hyper-processed, hyper-palatable, right?

• 3:56Lewis Howes?

  Usually has trans fats in it.

• 3:57Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes.

• 3:58Lewis Howes?

  So what are the main categories, you know? Because you could have peanut butter and not have trans fat, right?

• 4:04Thomas DeLauer?

  Oh yeah, absolutely. Like, I mean, and usually that's going to be the peanut butter that has the little layer of oil and you have to take the extra 30 seconds to stir it. Which, you know, the worst part about that is it ends up on your shirt, you know, you're trying to stir it.

• 4:14Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, all over your hands.

• 4:15Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, it's a mess, disaster. You know, so like, things like, I usually opt for maybe like a macadamia nut butter or something like that. It's like a thinner consistency, it's expensive, but, you know, almond butters, sure, I just think that they're overdone. There's a lot of almond butters out there, you know, coconut butter, like coconut manna, like, just awesome, like, right? So just trying to like, sub these things out. You know, I don't want to pick on peanut butter per se. Like, anything that's got a high amount of these hydrogenated oils in it, has clearly been like adulterated to become something that's, I don't want to say it's not safe for human consumption, but it's

• 4:47Lewis Howes?

  It's not healthy.

• 4:48Thomas DeLauer?

  It's pretty close.

• 4:49Lewis Howes?

  It's not healthy, yeah. That's interesting. Okay, so what are some other foods? Trans fats, is there anything else you would add in the "we should never have" category to live longer?

• 4:57Thomas DeLauer?

  I mean, never have? That's a pretty bold thing to say.

• 5:00Lewis Howes?

  I mean, what about, that may be like, very limited amounts, if you want to extend the quality of your life.

• 5:04Thomas DeLauer?

  Well, I saw at the American College of Cardiology, like, just within the last, like, two days, I've seen, that they are now finally listing refined grains as something that is not exactly the best for cardiovascular disease, right? And I say "not exactly the best", sort of with air quotes, because I'm careful how I word that. But, anything when you start getting in this hyper palatable, refined process, like, that's going to take the cake. Like, we can get nuance-y with all kinds of things. I could talk about sugar, I could talk about, you know, various lectins or whatever, we can get nuance-y, and we can certainly pick apart little things there. But the ones that we know are the things that are affecting the brain differently, right?

• 5:45Lewis Howes?

  Yes, cognitive nutrition.

• 5:46Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, well, cognitive nutrition, but also just the signals that it's sending to the brain, right? Like, Huberman talks about this kind of stuff all the time. We need to be looking at the bigger picture here. Like, if something is hyper palatable, and what it's doing to dopamine in the brain, what it's doing to the signals, and ultimately triggering us to A, eat more, but B, be... Like false signaling to the body overall and messing with these feedback loops. So like a refined starch, like if you were to eat, I'm not a big proponent of grains to begin with personally. Like people can attack me for that all day long, but personally, I don't feel amazing when I eat grains. That's just how I am.

• 6:21Lewis Howes?

  Your body doesn't process it.

• 6:23Thomas DeLauer?

  There's something there, like I get foggy, I can't put my finger on exactly what's going on. Again, I could pull research from both sides of the equation and we could poke holes in it and have a nuanced argument for six hours of that. But one thing is for certain is when you look at the data between like a whole grain, which again is still a grain, and refined grains.

• 6:43Lewis Howes?

  What's the difference?

• 6:43Thomas DeLauer?

  Very, very different. Well, I mean, a whole grain is going to be in its like whole husk form, you know, think brown rice with the husk on it, right? Think about the layers of digestion that have to occur. Think about how slow and how long it takes to digest that, right? Then you look at something that's refined, something that has been turned into a flour, bleached, treated with deodorants and all kinds of things to like basically make it devoid of nutrients other than just a vesicle for whatever other garbage you're putting on it, right? That's when it's refined and that's when it is a problem because it really doesn't have much nutrients other than just being a rather empty carbohydrate that they then have to fortify with everything else to ultimately put things back in that they took out when they bleached it and did whatever, right?

• 7:23Thomas DeLauer?

  So when you actually unpack what it is, it doesn't even sound like it's something you should be eating, right? And that's where, again, you can get in these discussions and arguments with people, but when you really explain like, okay, maybe we should just be living as close to the earth as possible. And that's a pretty balanced, honest thing to say. So these refined starches, yeah, you start noticing, okay, yeah, there's, there's potentially more risk for inflammation. There's potentially more risk for obviously higher blood glucose and things like that. And in a world where more and more and more and more of us are becoming insulin resistant, that's a very important thing to be paying attention to. Anything that's going to skyrocket blood glucose where you're not coming back down the way that you should is a recipe for disaster, in my opinion.

• 8:03Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, because what happens when the body is in that high spike of glucose, blood sugar, frequently throughout the day? Month after month, year after year, decade after decade. What is that doing to the body, to the nervous system, to the brain, to the gut, and the whole system together?

• 8:19Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, you know, I like to... High glucose is problem one. But the secondary problem is the one that really becomes sort of the issue. And that's the hyperinsulinemia. That's the insulin levels being very, very high in tandem with that.

• 8:34Lewis Howes?

  What do you call that?

• 8:35Thomas DeLauer?

  Hyperinsulinemia. So it's where insulin levels are really high. So glucose being high is one thing. But insulin also being chronically high is another situation.

• 8:43Lewis Howes?

  Like consistently, not dropping down, right?

• 8:45Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes, exactly. So that's where I'm very careful with this. Like, having a spike in glucose is not inherently bad. That's what the bodies... If you eat something with carbohydrates or even eat fruit, you're going to spike. Okay, but if you don't come back down, that's when you have a problem. Or if you have insulin that's constantly high because it's, you know, everything's out of whack, pancreas isn't knowing what to do, and beta cells aren't producing insulin at the right rate, and they produce more because they're not sure what's going on. So as long as insulin brings that glucose back down... Because you eat... Let's say you eat a bagel, okay? You eat a bagel, and your glucose spikes high. Well, the next thing that's going to happen is the liver is going to detect that that glucose is in the bloodstream, and it's going to send a signal to the pancreas,

• 9:29Thomas DeLauer?

  and the pancreas is going to secrete insulin. And it's this beautiful harmony of producing insulin that allows the cell doorway to open, and the glucose comes down, and everything's copacetic, right? Everything's all good. But in someone that is insulin resistant, that cell doorway doesn't open, right? So the glucose went high, and the first signal was working. Okay, let's produce more insulin. But the problem is, is that now the cell is non-responsive to insulin. So you're just producing more and more and more insulin to try to solve this blood glucose problem. So then you have two issues. You have hyperglycemia and hyperinsulinemia. And that's when you really start to have these problems, right?

• 10:08Lewis Howes?

  Is that when you get obese, or what happens then?

• 10:11Thomas DeLauer?

  I mean, it can certainly play a role with that. I think the biggest piece is the inflammation piece, right? Like, inflammation can lead to insulin resistance, and insulin resistance feeds inflammation, right? So you have... And I like to think of that as like a static. Okay, think of... Like radio static. Let's say you and I are talking on a two-way radio and we're a mile apart. And if there's no static and no frequency interruption, I can talk to you, you can hear me just fine. Okay, but now all of a sudden, something has created a bunch of static. And I'm trying to talk to you and you're not getting my message. Or, you know, cell phones, bad signal, right? The more inflammation you start getting, it's almost, that's the simplest, most colloquial way of putting it. Creating static. Disrupting this signal, right? And this signal is going to be disrupted from the hypothalamic-pituitary axis all the way down to, you know,

• 10:56Thomas DeLauer?

  pancreatic level and lots of different levels in the body. It doesn't just have to do with insulin dynamics. So, once this happens, it gets harder and harder and harder to send a signal. And then you're just, then everything gets out of whack. And then, you know, you're in states for chronic disease and all this when inflammation levels are high. So, I mean, I usually tell people, like, if you're really concerned about this, I mean, go get a breakdown of your inflammatory panels. Look at your C-reactive protein levels, look at various what are called interleukins. And that really tells you a lot, but without an expert opinion on like interpreting that data, it can just be paralyzing too. Sure, sure. But back to sort of the refined starches and refined carbs. That's something that doesn't have, the fiber's not in place to slow down digestion.

• 11:38Thomas DeLauer?

  Okay, you're lacking the minerals, you're lacking a lot of the other components that would normally slow down the digestion, so it can be spiking at a controllable level. And you're left with this like out of control spike that has nothing to slow it down. So what's the leading cause of insulin resistance then? It's a very difficult question to answer. And the two sides that are kind of opposing right now. You know, one side says it's saturated fat intake, which is interesting. Not trans fat, saturated fat. Well, trans fats play a role with that too, but saturated fat in general, right? Now, do I subscribe to that notion? Not 100%. I think in different departments, yes. The other side says, okay, it's just flat out not, you know, eating too much sugar and having sugar high.

• 12:22Thomas DeLauer?

  I think there's caveats with both of that. Consuming too much sugar is certainly a problem if you're not using it. And I think that we just get back to real simple basics here that people on the internet sometimes like to forget because it's so easy to just get tunnel vision and talk about one thing. Sugar is the problem. Sugar is the problem. Sugar sucks. Like, I don't think sugar is something we should all be eating a bunch of. But can you be granted more amnesty with your sugar consumption if you're actually moving your dang body? Absolutely. And that's the problem that we face. So, the sugar question, yes. Eating sugar is definitely a problem when it comes down to insulin resistance. Comma, if you are not active. Does that serve as a license to say you can eat as much sugar as you want if you're active? Absolutely not.

• 13:05Thomas DeLauer?

  But the caveat there is, again, once again, people eat a lot of sugar and then they sit down. They don't move it. And the biggest driver that we're seeing right now for insulin sensitivity, the opposite of insulin resistance, is skeletal muscle mass and moving the body with said skeletal muscle mass.

• 13:22Lewis Howes?

  So, when you have that, that helps you move the insulin down? Or what is that?

• 13:27Thomas DeLauer?

  It's called a glucose sink. So, if you think, like, if you look at my bicep and you think of it as...

• 13:32Lewis Howes?

  It's a good-looking bicep.

• 13:33Thomas DeLauer?

  It's a nice bicep. But it's like, so, think of it as a glucose sink, where this is almost a repository for glucose that I consume. I can consume glucose, and if I move my body, there's something called glucose independent or insulin-independent glucose uptake. So, what that means is independent of insulin, I can suck glucose right into my muscles. The bigger the muscles that I have, the more glucose I can suck up. It acts like a sink.

• 14:00Lewis Howes?

  And it won't impact you as negatively?

• 14:02Thomas DeLauer?

  As negatively, correct. Because I have much more potential to store it as glycogen and much more potential to just incinerate it.

• 14:08Lewis Howes?

  And process it and get it out.

• 14:09Thomas DeLauer?

  Precisely. Yeah, so...

• 14:10Lewis Howes?

  If you don't have the muscle, I guess, is it the quality of muscle? Is it the muscle mass? Is it the density? Or if you don't, what is it?

• 14:18Thomas DeLauer?

  I think that remains to be seen. I think that's where we're seeing more research. I don't think muscle fiber type matters. I don't, well, I could be wrong. At least we don't see that right now, right? I haven't seen any even in vitro research that suggests that. But it's very interesting and people don't need to be bodybuilders. Like, we're not talking ridiculous amounts. We're talking like muscle is the biggest suction of glucose. So, I mean, it would be a very simple explanation to say like if I had someone that was 110 pounds sitting next to me with very little muscle and we ate the same sized piece of cake, that person's glucose would probably spike higher than mine, right? And even if we took similar weights, but just looked at lean body mass. Like, let's say I'm 180 pounds, someone sitting here is 180 pounds.

• 15:03Thomas DeLauer?

  I have 140 pounds of muscle, they have, that's not going to be accurate. I have 140 pounds of muscle, they have 80 pounds of muscle or something. Their response to that piece of chocolate cake is going to be totally different to my response to that chocolate cake, even though we weigh the same.

• 15:18Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 15:19Thomas DeLauer?

  So, that is such a big piece. And then I usually say, even moving your body, like flexing your bicep or doing some squats sucks glucose into that muscle super fast.

• 15:29Lewis Howes?

  Without lifting weights.

• 15:30Thomas DeLauer?

  Without lifting weights, just moving the body. And so when you say like, what is the biggest cause of insulin resistance? It's the consumption of these hyper palatable processed carbohydrates and high amounts of carbohydrates in conjunction with not moving the body. That's why, I mean, you see athletes that can consume 500 grams of carbs. And that's maybe like, that's the bone I have to pick with a lot of like the CrossFit community is they have like the high level CrossFit athletes that are like, 500 grams of carbs, 500 grams of carbs, talking to the entry level CrossFit athletes that does 40 minutes of CrossFit workout and then sits on their butt the rest of the day in their office, right?

• 16:06Lewis Howes?

  They're not constantly moving and flexing and being mobile and stretching and all that stuff, yeah.

• 16:11Thomas DeLauer?

  And I guess, I mean, to do a service to the other part of this discussion. The saturated fat piece is interesting because the saturated fat piece basically implies that, okay, when you consume high amounts of saturated fat, it does affect beta cells and their production of insulin. Now, when you look at this, the carnivore community or super low carb community eats high amounts of saturated fat and they don't usually develop insulin resistance. So what we start looking at is, okay, well, it must be this middle ground. Saturated fat becomes a problem when it's in tandem with overconsumption of everything else. So above a certain point, overfeeding in general just becomes a problem. Above a certain point, you could probably overeat, you know, blackberries, right?

• 16:55Thomas DeLauer?

  Above a certain point, you could probably overeat coconut oil, saturated fat. But there's this line of like, when is it too much? And that's vague, but it's important to mention.

• 17:05Lewis Howes?

  It probably depends on each person's body type and things like that. I'm curious, have you ever done the glucose monitor?

• 17:09Thomas DeLauer?

  All the time. I usually, I usually wear one. I'm not right now because I was just on vacation.

• 17:14Lewis Howes?

  Have you ever tested to say, you know what? I'm going to try the worst foods, like the things with the most sugar, the different combinations of fats and sugars, and see which one spikes the most in your body?

• 17:25Thomas DeLauer?

  All the time, yeah.

• 17:26Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 17:27Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, and it's usually surprising, right? And it usually has to do with...

• 17:31Lewis Howes?

  It's like a piece of bread or something or a...

• 17:32Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, it's crazy. Like, I mean, for example, like, rice spikes me through the roof, but if I eat a piece of pizza, it doesn't spike. Now, there's obvious reason to that.

• 17:42Lewis Howes?

  That gives me hope for pizza consumption.

• 17:45Thomas DeLauer?

  There, there's fat in the pizza that's slowing down the carbohydrate. There's, you know, some protein in the pizzas, yeah. So it's all about, okay, this combination of things, which again gets very kind of granular, but usually singular, unopposed carbohydrate consumption will spike you very high.

• 18:02Lewis Howes?

  Bread versus bread, cheese, and meat.

• 18:04Thomas DeLauer?

  Correct. And I don't, and, but we also have to be careful not to rely on blood sugar as the only problem because if, if we look at that as the only barometer for our health, then that would be saying it's, okay, it was totally fine if, as long as I have that sourdough bread with a bunch of butter on it all the time.

• 18:20Lewis Howes?

  Right, that's not good.

• 18:21Thomas DeLauer?

  It's just like, it sends the wrong message, but I think that one... Thing that we should all be aware of is sort of our insulin dynamics and our blood glucose levels. Like, I think it tells us a lot as a general barometer for how are we using the fuel in our body. And that's like this fundamental thing that we've forgotten.

• 18:38Lewis Howes?

  I still haven't done it yet. I've had many of the different companies that have the glucose monitor and the tracking and all that stuff, reach out to me. And I think they're all really, really powerful what they're doing, giving you the data. I'm, I don't know, maybe I'm just like a baby. I don't want to have it on there for like a week or whatever. But I feel like it will give me so much more information about everything you eat, because it tells you all the information right after you eat it, right?

• 19:00Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, it's like, pretty much real time.

• 19:02Lewis Howes?

  So part of me feels like I gotta start doing that to really dial in, you know, the next decade of my life to make sure that I'm doing everything I can without obsessing too much, you know? It's, it's kind of having a balance of being able to consume some things, but also make sure I'm really healthy. So you recommend it though, right?

• 19:19Thomas DeLauer?

  Oh, yeah, for sure. My, my wife was so opposed to it because she like, she thought that it was going to be having to stick this massive needle in her arm or something like that. No, no, you just don't even feel it. And for my wife, it taught her so much about like when her cycle was coming and things like that. Like crazy stuff that we don't think about in the mainstream. Like, okay, what happens the week before her period? Like, oh, like, wow, why am I insulin resistant right now? I haven't even been eating bad and this peach is spiking me like crazy. It teaches you that hormones change things, sleep changes things. And I think that's what a glucose monitor really taught me was how I could eat, because I'm, I'm kind of robotic with what I eat most of the time. And how I eat on Monday, fully rested, reacts in my body entirely different than eating

• 20:04Thomas DeLauer?

  the same thing on Tuesday after a crappy night of sleep. Eating literally the same thing with, I could pretty much say literally the same workout, too. Like, and I've tested that, like, side by side. It's crazy. Or what stress does. Like, walking through the airport, like, just the stress of going through the airport, TSA, everything. Like, you don't realize it because you're busy and you're focused, but like, your heart rate's usually skyrocketing. Like, if you were any kind of wearable, you'd notice that. But what you don't realize is what's happening to your glucose. And

• 20:34Lewis Howes?

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• 24:43Thomas DeLauer?

  It's just, it gives you a perspective of, wow, people that are stressed out all the time. Like, no wonder they have chronically high glucose. It's not just their diet, it's also their lifestyle. And it gives you, again, it's just another data point, you know, and it's just like, all the data points we can get to help us navigate our life.

• 25:01Lewis Howes?

  So what I'm hearing you say is? Stress is a massive factor. And the ability to manage stressful situations and stay peaceful under stress is a massive factor in staying healthier versus getting sick or having more inflammation in your life.

• 25:18Thomas DeLauer?

  That I can say undoubtedly.

• 25:19Lewis Howes?

  So it almost sounds like you could eat the perfect foods. You could, you know, get seven, eight hours of sleep. But if you don't know how to manage your emotions and you allow your environment to stress you out, your relationships to stress you out, your bank account to overwhelm you, then it could affect you and you could be extremely unhealthy in the body as well if you don't manage stress. Is that what I'm hearing?

• 25:46Thomas DeLauer?

  Dude, 100%.

• 25:47Lewis Howes?

  Even if you do all the right things.

• 25:48Thomas DeLauer?

  Yep.

• 25:49Lewis Howes?

  You know, tracking your foods, your macros, your fasting, your whatever it is. But if you don't understand how to connect the, the mind and the heart.

• 26:00Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes.

• 26:00Lewis Howes?

  And create peace and heal the different things that are causing you to be triggered, then you're going to be overwhelmed and your body's going to be sick.

• 26:08Thomas DeLauer?

  Correct. Yeah. That's, I mean, it's, and you can see that when you are looking at any wearable, right? So like, I wear an Aura, I wear a Whoop, and then a lot of times I'm wearing it like, people are like, why do you wear both? And why do you also wear CGM? Right? Because I cross-reference data because I don't want to be dependent on one piece. I want to look and where are my common denominators? And I can tell you, like, upon multiple different people that I've talked to, professional athletes, military, special operations, you know, NFL, NHL, whatever, like, when they're wearing multiple wearables and we're looking at their continuous glucose, it's, you see, like, under stress, it's very similar patterns. You know, it's poor response to glucose, poor response to, you know, more stress. You become, like, it becomes a catalyst to, like, any little bit of stress. Sleep deprived plus stress, you're like a ticking time bomb, right?

• 26:53Thomas DeLauer?

  And they usually go hand in hand because, you know, sleep when you're stressed out or you get stressed.

• 26:58Lewis Howes?

  You're eating snacks at night or whatever it might be, right?

• 27:00Thomas DeLauer?

  Yep.

• 27:01Lewis Howes?

  So, okay, let me get this. This is interesting. In your life.

• 27:07Lewis Howes?

  What are the main causes of stress for you? And also, what are the main causes of stress for people? Is it relationships? Is it family? Is it career? Money? Like, what are the things that stress people out? And then what stresses you out?

• 27:21Thomas DeLauer?

  That's a good question. I think people that I talk to at various high levels, again, professional athletes.

• 27:27Lewis Howes?

  Military.

• 27:28Thomas DeLauer?

  Military kind of works in a, like, with special operations groups that I work with. Their, their family dynamics are exceptionally stressed. Because, so that's a little...

• 27:36Lewis Howes?

  They're gone for six months.

• 27:37Thomas DeLauer?

  Or, or just, you know, special operations. They might deploy last minute, whatever, right? So it's, that's almost an anomaly. Uh, so their situations are heavily stressed, relationship-based, you know, relationship-wise. But with the, the bulk of people that I talk to, yeah, a lot of their stress does come from relationships and does come from their family.

• 27:55Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 27:56Thomas DeLauer?

  And it's, uh, it's wild because I've had to position myself in a different way. Like, relationship, like, I've been with my wife since high school, right? So I had, that has the ability to weigh on me heavily. I have two small kids. That is stressful. But how you perceive that stress is everything, right? Remember, you know, Angela Duckworth's work? I'm sure you're familiar with that.

• 28:15Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 28:16Thomas DeLauer?

  It's like, how you perceive stress is really how it impacts you. Like, you stress and distress and all that, like, you know, a...

• 28:22Lewis Howes?

  It's the interpretation of the events.

• 28:24Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes.

• 28:25Lewis Howes?

  Not the event itself.

• 28:26Thomas DeLauer?

  Precisely.

• 28:26Lewis Howes?

  That causes stress. It's how you perceive and interpret it.

• 28:29Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, like a four-year-old that's excited to go to Disneyland tomorrow. Their physiological response in their body is very similar to mine around tax time.

• 28:37Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 28:38Thomas DeLauer?

  But, but, think about it, right? They're excited to go to Disneyland.

• 28:41Lewis Howes?

  Their adrenaline's high.

• 28:42Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, everything, all these, the cortisol, adrenaline, everything. Same as me at tax time, right? So it's, and, it's again, a simple way to put it, but it's the interpretation. Like, I don't, I can't possibly get excited about paying taxes. Like, no matter how I turn it, that's not happening. But I can, if I really, really try, like, find positive spins on it that might lessen the load.

• 29:02Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 29:02Thomas DeLauer?

  And my point in saying that is that with people that are stressed about, about their relationships, like, or, I say family, because relationships can be a little bit tougher. Like, when someone just meets someone and there's relationship stress because you're trying to align core values, but...

• 29:15Lewis Howes?

  But once you're in a relationship.

• 29:16Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes.

• 29:16Lewis Howes?

  And you have a partnership.

• 29:17Thomas DeLauer?

  And core values are aligned and things like that. Like, how you perceive that stress should be different. Like, I encourage people, especially with pro athletes that are traveling all the time, be like, look at, like, look at your relationships and your family as a positive. Like, that is stress, just like working out. The stress you are experiencing with your family, although it's tough, it's working towards making a better relationship. Okay? Compare that to like the stress, like, financial stress, and some things that are somewhat out of your control. Not to say that families aren't in your, out of, that are totally in your control, but I look at my family as like, I'm not gonna let this be a stressor that's gonna churn and burn. I'm gonna let it be a stressor as like, I need to be intimate with my wife because it's important to our marriage, even if I don't want to be. I don't see that as like a bad thing, like, right?

• 30:00Thomas DeLauer?

  Or, I need to spend this time with my son, even though I'm tired and exhausted. Like, I'm like, oh, damn kid. No, it's like, okay, hey, like, I'm tired, but it's just like going to the gym. I know this is doing me something good, even if I'm not in the mood. So, that's a different category. And then, like, what stresses me out personally, uh, similar to you, like, we're visible all the time. And people forget that being visible comes with a lot of different negative attributes. Like, sure, it has its perks. Sure, it's great in a lot of ways, but anyone that's ever been in the limelight at all and under scrutiny all the time, that's a constant stressor. And no matter how you spin it, that stuff's gonna weigh on you. So, how do I, I mean, how I deal with that is simply being aware of it,

• 30:42Thomas DeLauer?

  you know, and recognizing it and understanding that it's okay to feel the way that I feel. And I think that anyone can feel that way throughout different stressors if you just acknowledge it and you understand that it's okay. Like, this is a temporary thing, whatever. You can go down a million rabbit holes with.

• 30:57Lewis Howes?

  Right, right. I'm curious about how you got into this space in the first place, because at one point, you were about 280 pounds.

• 31:04Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah.

• 31:04Lewis Howes?

  Completely, you know, overweight at the time. How did you get there? What were the emotional and psychological reasons, if you could look back, that caused you to get your body, your health and your life to be in that direction? What was the, the key that unlocked you to becoming in this field? And, you know, now losing all the weight and being, you know, less than 8% body fat and, you know, a chiseled Greek god on YouTube? You know, all these things that have supported you in getting, you know, you went from one extreme to the next in a sense, but you became very educated and informed and... How did this all come about?

• 31:42Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, so it's a good question. I mean, when I was at my heaviest, it came from, I was a skinny cross-country runner in high school. Okay, I played, I played rugby, but I was a winger, so I was always kind of the light, fast guy. Super skinny, picked on for being skinny all the time. So for me, it was like, I gotta get big. I gotta, I gotta put some muscle on, right? So, you know, like my senior year of high school, I started working out, put on some muscle and stuff like that. And then I decided like, you know, started going on bodybuilding forums, like, I want to be a bodybuilder, I want to, and I put on some good mass. And then I realized like, oh, I need to, I need to like, turn this into a bulk, right? So it starts out with, it, it basically like me becoming very, very overweight, started as a bulk that went out of control and turned into me just like completely losing hope and just

• 32:24Thomas DeLauer?

  continuing to eat like that until, you know, sitting down, being sedentary. I was working in a, at that time, a corporate healthcare job. I was an executive recruiter. So I went from bodybuilding style bulk to just, I don't give a crap. Like, I'm just gonna keep eating like this.

• 32:38Lewis Howes?

  How many calories a day is this probably?

• 32:41Thomas DeLauer?

  I mean, if I had to put my finger on it, I was, I mean, I was eating so much like Jack in the Box tacos and like, I mean, it's just hard to like equate an exact amount of calories. I'd probably say

• 32:49Lewis Howes?

  Five to seven thousand.

• 32:50Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, somewhere in there, you know, and the, I was a runner growing up, so I was always accustomed to being able to actually consume decent, and this happens to so many athletes, the people that are high school athletes.

• 33:00Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 33:00Thomas DeLauer?

  And that was, I was a perfect example of that. I went from being a runner that could afford to eat 5,000 calories a day, because I was running all the time, to just life hitting me. All of a sudden, I'm responsible for my own bills. I'm, you know, like, things were just different. And all of a sudden, I'm under a bunch of stress. I was like in a commission-only job. I was like, you know, physician recruiting. So I was placing physicians in different positions at hospitals and long-term acute care. And it was very stressful because if I didn't perform, I didn't get paid. And with that came a bunch of stress. You know, I was up to like eight or nine Monster Drinks per day at one point.

• 33:31Lewis Howes?

  Ooh.

• 33:31Thomas DeLauer?

  Like the fully-leaded ones with the sugar.

• 33:33Lewis Howes?

  Oh my gosh.

• 33:33Thomas DeLauer?

  Like unreal. Like, my health went from being pretty decent as a high school athlete to being officially diabetic. Like, like actually by numbers, right? I reversed it pretty quick, because, you know, I personally

• 33:46Lewis Howes?

  It wasn't that long into it.

• 33:47Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, exactly. But still, like, the fact that I put myself there in a two-year period, that's how bad my lifestyle was. Like, I went from decent pinnacle of health, putting on some muscle, young, fresh kid, to like, I mean, I ruined myself, like I really ruined myself and it was just a recipe of, you know, being sedentary, high stress, high, high, high sugar diet and just, I mean fortunately, the one thing that was stable was my relationship. My wife had been with me since high school and she, she loved me one way or the other, but yeah.

• 34:16Lewis Howes?

  She knew you were like 160 pounds and then 280 pounds.

• 34:20Thomas DeLauer?

  Wow. Yeah, she's, and she's, you know, she's never wavered. She's always like, loves me the same. I've never felt like she treated me differently in any one category, which is probably one of the reasons why I possibly even felt unable to add that weight. I was like, whatever, I just let my body go. My wife's gonna love me.

• 34:35Lewis Howes?

  She accepts you no matter what.

• 34:36Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah. And, you know, deep down, I mean, I think about that now, retroactively, like I think, okay, 11, 12 years ago, and I was like, I was like, I wonder if like, if, if she had have put more pressure on me, and this is not crapping on her, right? This is like saying like, I wonder if, if she had have like said, hey, like, you look disgusting or something, if that would have been a catalyst for me, because I've always been.

• 34:57Lewis Howes?

  To, to get out of the relationship or to actually get into shape?

• 35:00Thomas DeLauer?

  Get into shape. Yeah. It'd be like, hey, like you're like, you gotta do something.

• 35:03Lewis Howes?

  Well, she said it in a loving compassionate way. Like, hey, I love and accept you how you are, but I don't see this being good for you long-term. I'm worried about your health.

• 35:11Thomas DeLauer?

  Or she, she prob, and she probably did actually, and I'm just one of those people that's just like, I was so laser focused and I was so focused on just making money at that time. Like that was just, you know, young kid, want to impress everybody, want to make money and like, I'm glad I got that all out of my system when I was really young. Like I got, you know, just trying to chase coin and like let my health go to crap. I'm glad that I got through that when I was in my twenties, because I don't think that it would be the same situation if it happened to me now. Like I, I don't think I would have some metabolic resilience on my side like I did when I was younger.

• 35:40Lewis Howes?

  Hundred percent. Interesting. So what is something about you that most people in your audience don't know about you?

• 35:47Thomas DeLauer?

  I think people probably don't know, you know, much about like how everything was built, you know, how Thomas Delauer.

• 35:56Thomas DeLauer?

  Came to be like what he is like I'm not some guy that just quit the corporate world and spun up a YouTube channel like you know I essentially been on my own since I was about thirteen and a half years old. And like I homeschooled through high school because I was working full time to help support my mom and things like and he's like people don't realize that you know overnight success ten years in the making kind of thing. Like I mean for so many years my wife and I you know working sixteen hours just to make ends meet and it's just like eventually things started to click. But people don't realize what positions people to be I don't want to even consider myself a top performer per se because maybe I'm too humble with that but at the same time. Like what carves a person and why they go the direction that they go. So what what happened for you?

• 36:41Thomas DeLauer?

  And it was just like you know you look at that kind of thing like I had so many unique experiences I mean I um. When I was eleven years old I ran my first marathon right and it's like one of the things. I ran my first one last year at thirty thirty nine. You were like extreme yeah. My my mom was and I've kind of I've thought about this a lot right like I feel as an adult that perhaps. I could not get the approval of my mother unless I was running right because my mom was a runner and. I don't think that was her intent of course but as I've gotten older I realize like what I crave right you know you look at like Tony Robbins has always talked about like who did you crave attention from right?

• 37:20Thomas DeLauer?

  And I craved this attention from I craved attention from my dad but at the same time I craved the love and support from my mom and my mom was very like. You're either gonna run and do this with me or not gonna really hang out like it was so as that kind of flash forwards into my my adult life. It's interesting where it's like if I have almost this need to perform in order to be loved right? And that's getting very vulnerable and real with that situation is something that is taking me. You know, a lot of meditation and a lot of processes to kind of come to to understand like, okay, well, that's okay. I have to perform, but I also feel like I have to stay in shape to be worthy of love. I have to be. And could I say-

• 38:03Lewis Howes?

  Is this something you feel now or something you felt then?

• 38:04Thomas DeLauer?

  I think it's something I felt then and something that I definitely feel in a strange way now with having a big audience, right? So in some ways, being aware of it has helped that situation. But in other ways, having an audience has also magnified it, right? But as long as you're aware of that situation, I think you can, you can make it okay. You can make it good. Because short of really having major experiences and really having semi-traumatic events to like shift the way you think, some of that subconscious behavior is just hard to change, hard to shift. But what most people do is they don't go through their life ever realizing that they, that exists in the first place.

• 38:45Thomas DeLauer?

  So if I walk into a room and I understand that, okay, I am going to feel like these people are going to judge me if I am not a specimen, if I'm not perfect. But if I actually believe that is a different story.

• 38:58Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 38:58Thomas DeLauer?

  Right? So it makes it more fun. It gamifies it. So now for me, it's a challenge against my subconscious self in some ways where it's like, okay, I can, I can change this. Or I recognize this and I can derive it and I can use it as a... But will it ever be able to change? I'm sure. It might take a catalyst, it might take something to sort of like shock me out of it.

• 39:20Lewis Howes?

  Do you feel like you fully love and accept yourself where you're at? No matter what you do or are you not there yet?

• 39:25Thomas DeLauer?

  No, I'm not there. Really? Yeah, I'm not there. And it's, and it's, there's a lot of unpacking to do with like my childhood and things like that.

• 39:32Lewis Howes?

  What do you think it would take for you to love and accept yourself?

• 39:36Thomas DeLauer?

  That's a good question.

• 39:39Thomas DeLauer?

  I've thought about it a lot and I really don't know. And I think- The uncanny thing is that I've been overweight and that didn't affect how I looked at myself per se.

• 39:51Lewis Howes?

  Really, like your identity?

• 39:52Thomas DeLauer?

  It didn't affect my identity. Like, I was still a very driven person. So I know that what drives me is performance, whether it's going to be business or working out. So there's some, something to think about drive in general. So it doesn't necessarily have to do with my physical appearance or my physical body.

• 40:12Lewis Howes?

  The results, though.

• 40:13Thomas DeLauer?

  Results, yes. Very, and being a results-oriented person can be detrimental if that's all you're chasing. If everything is like a transactional feel, right?

• 40:22Lewis Howes?

  And is there a lot of stress and pressure that, okay, I'm on, you know, 15 million views a month and almost 3 million subscribers and tons of social media followers and all these people so used to seeing me in a specific physical shape, a condition, you know, the six-pack and the everything. And you're shirtless a lot when you're teaching a lot of stuff. Do you feel the weight and the pressure and the stress to always be this, you know, this look?

• 40:50Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 40:51Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 40:51Thomas DeLauer?

  Definitely feel that way.

• 40:52Lewis Howes?

  Do you ever feel like you can just kind of relax?

• 40:54Thomas DeLauer?

  Well, the funny thing is when I relax, usually my body composition gets better. It's kind of funny how that works. But, yeah, definitely. I mean, it's, but at the same time, it's like I love what I do so much. And while I have some youth on my side, like, I feel great with it. I don't feel like I'm stepping in a direction where it's detrimental to my mental health. But with that, it's like when you look at, yeah, you have algorithms that are constantly rewarding you for behavior that might not be good to your long-term mental health, right? And what I mean by that is like, yeah, it sucks when you look at the fact that a shirtless piece of content from me on Instagram dramatically outperforms one with me with a shirt on, right?

• 41:36Thomas DeLauer?

  That is not exactly the Pavlovian response that I want to be having constantly in my life. So there's even questions of sometimes it's like, is this what I want? Is this my destiny? Is this what I want to keep doing? Do I want this transactional Pavlovian response that's not aligned with my moral compass, right?

• 41:52Lewis Howes?

  Interesting. So how do you battle that?

• 41:54Thomas DeLauer?

  It's, it's, I'd say like, I can battle it by utilizing like different systems within social media. So for example, YouTube is a chance for me to, like, I'm hardly ever shirtless on YouTube. Like, I, like, YouTube is something where... People respect me for my ability to articulate complex subject matter.

• 42:14Lewis Howes?

  Your research.

• 42:15Thomas DeLauer?

  And that's something that I could do if I was got hit by a bus and paralyzed from the waist down, right, like or from the neck down. Like I could still do that. And I still think people would respect me for my intellect. And it just goes to show in different worlds, like how Instagram is such a different platform where that is much more visual, right? So I try to kind of find that balance where I get a little bit of both. Okay, like YouTube, it's an opportunity to flex my mental muscles, so to speak, and really articulate these things. So it's almost a systematic way of doing it. Now, that's very surface level, right? I think what you're asking is like at a deeper level, like, how do I balance this stuff? And I mean, obviously, through lots of meditation, through lots of, you know, external work and

• 42:56Thomas DeLauer?

  internal work, you know, it's okay, like, how do I, you know, interpret this in a different way? I mean, if it's gonna be, I'm trying to think, I don't want to say this and have it go off, you know, but obviously psychedelics are a piece of that, right? But I don't necessarily want to talk about that. You know, so just various ways, you know, through meditation, how do I achieve a different perspective? How do I understand this different piece? And also, just, I mean, good old therapy, right? I think that people don't, they put this in a bucket where if you go to therapy or you talk about situations, you talk about your life, that it's a point of weakness. But I use it as an advantage. I mean, this is something like I'm, it's like a cheat code. Like, if you learn how you react to something

• 43:37Thomas DeLauer?

  and why you do certain things, it is a cheat code for how you can better help others.

• 43:42Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 43:43Thomas DeLauer?

  And people, people forget that. So the fact that I'm still on a journey of mastery, I will never master myself, and I will never reach ultimate mastery, that is, I'm at peace with that because it gives me something, again, being so driven, that that makes it nice. It's like a constant journey that I can go on.

• 44:01Lewis Howes?

  On a scale of one to 10, let's call this the self-love and self-peace scale, 10 being you fully love and accept yourself and you have a lot of peace internally, one being you hate yourself, you have no self-love, and you're in constant stress.

• 44:20Lewis Howes?

  On average, where do you fall on the scale right now?

• 44:23Thomas DeLauer?

  Six and a half.

• 44:24Lewis Howes?

  Six and a half?

• 44:25Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah.

• 44:26Lewis Howes?

  What does that feel like?

• 44:27Thomas DeLauer?

  Let's say, it feels like I'm confident in just about every decision that I'm making consciously. But I feel like there's a little bit of a misalignment of my, little cognitive dissonance of my, my core values and what maybe I'm destined to do in my life.

• 44:45Lewis Howes?

  What are you destined to do? What do you believe is being called to do?

• 44:49Thomas DeLauer?

  You know, I feel like I'm scratching the surface of it right now. I do believe that I'm destined to help people. But I feel like I'm destined to help people in a much more direct way than the sort of indirect mass way that I do right now on YouTube. I feel like there's something bigger. I feel like there's a, call it an existential crisis, if you will, in some ways. But I feel like there's, there's more that I can give and more that I can do to help not just others, but myself indirectly by helping others. So I do wake up frequently thinking like, am I living to my full potential? And as I've gotten older and I start to feel aches and pains more in my body and I realize like, okay, things hurt when I work out now and things like, okay.

• 45:32Thomas DeLauer?

  What I used to sort of translate into, how hard can I push physically? Now it's a lot more of, well, what more can I, can I give and what more can I do mentally and spiritually and all this?

• 45:44Lewis Howes?

  Interesting.

• 45:44Thomas DeLauer?

  Which is vague, but I just feel like there's more on the table. If, like, I feel like the, the plate is definitely not full.

• 45:51Lewis Howes?

  What would it look like?

• 45:53Thomas DeLauer?

  I think having kids has shaped that a little bit. It's helped me realize that, I think that there's a younger generation that needs a lot of help. I see the direction of ways that we're going even with health. And I look at my kids and I get kind of nervous with that. And I think, okay, well, in order for me to feel fulfilled, I feel like I need to help this, like, my kids' generation. Because I can't really feel confident in what I'm doing, helping people, my peers, my age, knowing that maybe this is neglecting this entire next generation. It's given me a different vantage point, like having kids, like having a level of empathy that I didn't have before. And is what I am doing, although... Seemingly altruistic, is it actually more selfish than anything?

• 46:38Lewis Howes?

  What, your business?

• 46:39Thomas DeLauer?

  My business is my being, right?

• 46:42Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 46:42Thomas DeLauer?

  And I know that's very deep, but it's, I look at this younger generation and I have a feeling of discontent. And I'm just kinda like, oh man, like they're getting the short end of the stick here with everything that's kind of gone on in society, right? Like everything, like how do I help that? But I don't know how to help.

• 46:58Lewis Howes?

  Well, teaching parents, really, on how to like to eat well, to live well. And so that they teach their kids would be one of them.

• 47:05Thomas DeLauer?

  That's a very, that's a very, very good point. And that's happening indirectly, right?

• 47:08Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 47:09Thomas DeLauer?

  And that's like you saying things like that, that's like, okay, there's a, there's a conscious feeling there that, okay, maybe there is something that's... And this is all in trying to achieve a different level of greatness, right? It's not, it's not because I'm picking apart what I'm doing and I'm not happy with where I am.

• 47:23Lewis Howes?

  You're not fully fulfilled.

• 47:24Thomas DeLauer?

  Still, there's more, there's gotta be more.

• 47:25Lewis Howes?

  Well, six and a half is, it's like a D, it's like a D plus.

• 47:30Thomas DeLauer?

  I guess you're right.

• 47:31Lewis Howes?

  It's like a D or something.

• 47:33Thomas DeLauer?

  And you know, and there's, I mean, I guess you've probably asked this question with other people, but there's days where it's an eight, right? There's even days where it's probably been a nine. And if I think, I think if I wanted to get analytical about it, I probably need to reverse engineer what makes those days feel that way, right? You know, because when I am most at peace and when I am most happy is when I'm out backpacking, when I'm just out in the woods and enjoying it, right? Like when I'm, or just with my family, but really just in nature, right? That's where I get that solitude. I'm such an introvert, which people would never think because I'm on social media, but it's like I recharge when I have that solitude. So it's, it's very interesting. Like if I start reverse engineering, okay, this is when I feel optimal.

• 48:14Thomas DeLauer?

  And the, the cool thing is, and this is motivational for, I guess, everybody, is that regardless of whether I wake up as a six or wake up as a 10, the one thing that never really waivers for me anymore is the eating patterns, right? I've, I've stabilized that. And I think that that can be done with anybody. And I, I want to transition for just a second because I want to give motivation for people that feel that way. Because a lot of people, if they were to wake up feeling like a six, they would eat like a six.

• 48:39Lewis Howes?

  Or maybe worse than a six.

• 48:41Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, right? Yeah, and then that kinda just manifests where they go, right? Then the next day they wake up like a five because they ate like a five. So I guess in a, in a very simple way, eat like a 10, always eat like a 10, you know, and you'll feel like a 10.

• 48:51Lewis Howes?

  But how do people actually do that? I mean, I've had a lot of different nutritionists and...

• 48:57Lewis Howes?

  Health researchers and experts and weight loss and all these things. Psychologists, therapists, talking about these things, but for so many people, it is extremely difficult to discipline their diet, to discipline their nutritional intake. And be consistent of eating healthy, good things that they know they're supposed to do consistently.

• 49:18Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah.

• 49:19Lewis Howes?

  I'm one of those people, you know, I I've never been drunk, I've never been high, I don't do drugs, I don't do psychedelics, I don't do mushrooms, none of that stuff. But sugar is a thing that comes and goes in waves.

• 49:29Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah.

• 49:29Lewis Howes?

  Some weeks and months, I'm extremely disciplined and minimal and other times I'm just like, ah, I feel great, so let me just, you know, it's not gonna affect me, and then it affects me. And it's been hard, and I'm a very disciplined person, but it's still hard for me to be very disciplined on nutrition 100% of the time.

• 49:50Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah.

• 49:51Lewis Howes?

  So how, and I'm disciplined, you know, I'm striving for greatness as performance and results. So for people that don't have that type of discipline, how can they be consistent on the nutritional intake over a lifetime and make it their lifestyle and not just a diet?

• 50:09Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, I mean, it's such a basic, good question that people always want to bring it back to like tracking and things like that. And I think that that doesn't, that that works, tracking works. But you're talking about it at a deeper level, right?

• 50:22Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 50:23Thomas DeLauer?

  I I experienced the same thing. I could have the most steadfast meditator monk that I'm talking to, and they will still battle with this, right?

• 50:33Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 50:34Thomas DeLauer?

  And it's some to the point where we have so much things, so many things that are just available at our fingertips that are just

• 50:41Lewis Howes?

  Temptations.

• 50:41Thomas DeLauer?

  Not not in alignment with how we've continued to evolve as, you know, it's like we just. Technology and food production and the food industry is growing at an exponentially faster rate than how we are changing, right? So we have these things that are available that just simply shouldn't, and outside of putting yourself in a locker and like away from these foods, a total echo chamber, like you are fighting temptation all the time. And we have to recognize that there's only so much power in your prefrontal cortex. There's only so much-

• 51:11Lewis Howes?

  So much willpower, yeah.

• 51:12Thomas DeLauer?

  Like it's a finite resource. So with that, you have to kind of change your way of thinking. And the way that, like this occurred to me like three years ago or so, when I had, I had a really, really bad like sinus infection. And I've always had them kind of recurring sinus infections ever since I was little. But I had one that was really bad and I couldn't taste or smell for like two months, right? And that was something where I realized like, why am I still craving these certain foods? I can't even taste them, right? And it was like this aha moment where I'm like, this is clearly a mental thing because something sweet hits your taste buds, it's not just the taste of it, it's what it's doing in the brain. So changing your relationship with food, changing your relationship with struggle has been a very big thing, right? So for me, I always had this kinesthetic awareness thing with my workouts, right?

• 51:57Thomas DeLauer?

  With workouts, it was like if I inflicted pain upon myself and it was positive pain for a workout, I could flip this kinesthetic switch that was like, I called it my pain switch and I would flip that pain switch and you know, as a, as an athlete, like that's sometimes just what you do and it happens inadvertently. Sometimes you visualize it, but visualization is huge. So for me, I'd visualize flipping the pain switch. The switch is off, I can now push it harder and push it past my normal aerobic capacity, anaerobic, whatever. I realized, why can't I apply that same thing to nutrition without becoming robotic, but becoming very, very aware? And so I've changed my relationship with how food makes me feel. So like, and that's taken a lot of work.

• 52:36Lewis Howes?

  What do you say to yourself? What's the conversation, the inner dialogue, the, the mental strategy you use to do that?

• 52:43Thomas DeLauer?

  As simple as it sounds, whenever I would eat something for about two or three months, I would simply say like, food is fuel. Food is fuel. And that sounds very, because you don't want to take the fun out of it. I still love food, right? So with, when you do that, but you have to train yourself to believe that- Like, okay, if I'm eating this sugar, that's okay, but remember it's fuel and I should use it. Right? Or if I'm, and that's the thing here. So if I want to eat it, make sure I move my body, go for a 10 minute walk, walk up some stairs, move it a little bit, just get it out. When you change the relationship with food, you're not abstaining, you're, you're changing the reaction. Right? So like. And I should never have a bucket of ice cream and then just sit around. Well, that's, it's just the thing, right? It's like, if you're gonna do it. Eat it in the morning, eat it for breakfast, whatever.

• 53:28Thomas DeLauer?

  And then go move all day. Exactly. It's, so that relationship, I mean, it gets much bigger than that, right? But that relationship with food is everything. And so many of us have a distorted relationship with food. And for me being, I've been on opposite ends of sort of the spectrum, right? Like when I was younger, I was practically, you know, as a runner, I was practically eating disorder category, the other direction. Like I have to be as light as possible. Oh, I don't want to eat that. I don't want to get fat. And then it kind of went the other way. It was almost like masochistic where I'm just like, I don't care. I'm fat already. Let's just go all the way. Okay, now it's kind of like fine, a little bit of that middle ground, but pendulum is probably swings much more towards how I was when I was younger. Got to stay lean, got to stay this. But I also have recognized that like food, food is still reward.

• 54:13Thomas DeLauer?

  And we were constantly told that food shouldn't be treated as a reward. Don't reward your kids with food. I call on that. The reason is, is because like food has always been a reward. Right? It's always been a reward. You get the hunt and you get the food. Yeah. You go gather and you get some food. Yeah. It's simple, right? It's, what you have to do is you just have to, once again, change the relationship with the feelings attached to food. Recognize that those feelings are there, but do something with them rather than just let them, let them be and consume you. If I am going to go and eat that ice cream, then I'm aware of what that's doing in my body. And I'm not going to let that turn me the other direction and get depressed and go eat more. I'm gonna say, you know what? This is an opportunity, an opportunity to move more, an opportunity to move tomorrow.

• 54:57Thomas DeLauer?

  And that's not having this transactional relationship again, because what you don't want to do is say. I'm gonna eat some pie and now I'm gonna punish myself by going on the treadmill. That's the exact wrong thing to do, right? But you do say, okay, I'm gonna eat this pie. Great, I've got full glycogen tanks. I'm gonna go work out. I'm gonna get the best workout of my life. I'm gonna have some fun with this, right? And I teach my kids the same thing. And having kids has really made this apparent. Because kids are constantly, I want a snack, I want a snack. It's like they have five stomachs, I don't understand that. And like, how do you, if they're reaching for like a Lara bar or something that I would still consider are healthy, but has a decent amount of sugar from dates and stuff, right? Like, kids just crave these things.

• 55:37Thomas DeLauer?

  And how do I teach them that you, yeah, you can eat that, but we should really get out and move? And you know, it's kind of like, how I translate it to them is, hey, it's fun to feel good. It's fun to feel good, right? Like, you've got this energy from that bar, doesn't that feel good? Like, let's get out and let's use that energy. Let's go have fun. And now it's to the point where my kids are like, can I have a Lara bar? I wanna go outside and play. I'm like, this is awesome. That's cool. Without actually, like, molding them in any weird way, I've helped them like light a spark to understand that like, when they eat this, and at a young subconscious level in their brain, it's probably forming something that's beyond what we even know in research, where maybe they taste something sweet and now they naturally wanna move.

• 56:21Thomas DeLauer?

  Versus saying like, oh, shame, guilt, I shouldn't have eaten this, it's terrible. No, we're gonna go have fun, we're gonna play. And, but I teach them that with, not just sugar, I teach them that with fats too, because I think it's also fundamental to learn that all food is fuel. Yes. But be in touch with how it makes you feel. So, how I retain that discipline is the exact same way. It's like, how do I feel? What did, what do I feel after I eat this? Did I feel crappy? Okay, well, then that's probably a pretty good articulation of what that's doing in my body. And with that, it's, it's really turned into this intuitive eating. And that's like, I guess, I mean, it's a great segue to talk about how fasting has worked, right? Because fasting has allowed me to have more flexibility with my diet

• 57:04Thomas DeLauer?

  in the confines of still like appropriate discipline. Because I can flip that switch on and off a lot easier. Fasting, not fasting. Fasting, not fasting.

• 57:13Lewis Howes?

  And you're one of the, there's a few things I want to talk about here before I get into fasting. One is the mantra, it sounds like you had, the mental switch, the mantra of food is fuel. So is that something you would think about right before you were making a decision of what to eat?

• 57:29Thomas DeLauer?

  No.

• 57:29Lewis Howes?

  You'd see something?

• 57:30Thomas DeLauer?

  Usually while eating it.

• 57:31Lewis Howes?

  While eating it. So it wasn't helping you make a decision of like, okay, here's a candy bar. Am I going to decide this is, is this going to help me and fuel me in a positive way or a negative fuel?

• 57:41Thomas DeLauer?

  That's too willpower-y. That's too, that takes too much energy.

• 57:44Lewis Howes?

  So you would still eat the candy bar if you needed, or if you did?

• 57:46Thomas DeLauer?

  While, while, yes. And granted, this was happening three, three and a half years ago. So candy bars weren't really in the equation anymore.

• 57:53Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 57:53Thomas DeLauer?

  But that being said-

• 57:55Lewis Howes?

  Because of an apple or whatever.

• 57:56Thomas DeLauer?

  Okay, yeah, or something like, because I would still crave fruit or, you know, whatever. But yes, exactly. It's like while I'm consuming it, it's like really trying to teach my body and understand like this visualization. You know the power of visualization, obviously, just yourself and the guests you've had on. It's like that visualization with eating something can be just as powerful.

• 58:15Lewis Howes?

  So you would say this as you're having a bite of the apple or whatever it might be, be having an internal conversation, food is fuel, and then having a positive relationship with something that might be looked at as negative before. Is that what I'm hearing you say?

• 58:29Thomas DeLauer?

  Precisely, yep.

• 58:30Lewis Howes?

  And training your body to appreciate the food and to say, okay, I'm going to go act and move my body after I eat this and it's going to help me, it's not going to hurt me, and I don't need to be shameful about eating this. Is that kind of the process?

• 58:43Thomas DeLauer?

  Yep.

• 58:43Lewis Howes?

  Because a lot of people that eat something and they, they feel good because it tastes good, but then they feel shameful.

• 58:48Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes.

• 58:49Lewis Howes?

  And that doesn't help them because then they have more of that to have the good feeling and then feel shame again. And the cycle continues.

• 58:55Thomas DeLauer?

  Because what is happening here is much different than what's happening here.

• 58:59Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 59:00Thomas DeLauer?

  And, you know, in our world, we get this instant gratification from food, especially like the translation of, I see a direct correlation with my time scrolling social media and my addiction to my phone, direct line item correlation to how much I crave snacking and things like that. It's the same firing, you know, right? It's like that same dopamine itch that needs to be scratched. And just in the same way I get addicted to looking at my phone or checking my email, that usually correlates with how much my addiction to food is at that point in time. But like you don't just say like, I am going to like resist the urge to check my email. I'm going to resist the urge to check my email. Sometimes it takes like, what is the response? Like a lot of times, you know, you'll, you'll check your email first thing in the morning.

• 59:44Thomas DeLauer?

  You'll get a negative email and you, it hits you then you're like, this is how I'm starting my day? Like this is what I'm gonna do? Like screw that. And that's your catalyst. But like with food, you eat a Snickers bar and it feels so good up here. You feel like you're doing the right thing.

• 59:57Lewis Howes?

  It's amazing.

• 59:58Thomas DeLauer?

  Everything is telling you in that immediate moment that this was a good decision, Louis. Like you did the right thing.

• 1:00:04Lewis Howes?

  Your belly afterwards is like, oh, why is it digesting weird? And now I feel like lethargic and yeah.

• 1:00:09Thomas DeLauer?

  And you go out and you move and you try to do something with it. And yeah, you're going to have some fuel, but you're going to be like, you know what? It's crazy enough. That didn't feel as good as when I had that apple. And you start creating this internal like checks and balances, if you want to call it that.

• 1:00:23Lewis Howes?

  I want to ask you a question about belly fat because I feel like this is, what is the stat now? Forty percent of Americans are obese? Is that the stat?

• 1:00:31Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, it's somewhere around that.

• 1:00:33Lewis Howes?

  Forty, forty-five, something like that.

• 1:00:33Thomas DeLauer?

  It's pretty crazy.

• 1:00:35Lewis Howes?

  It's probably what, like 3% of Americans have a six pack? I don't know what the percentage is, but it's probably very low.

• 1:00:42Lewis Howes?

  And I don't think people should have the goal of actually trying to get a six pack. I don't know if that's the best route to take their lifestyle. I'm all about results and performance, but I, and I really should be, I really believe it should be about the process, the daily journey, making good decisions every day, having good habits. And the results will take care of itself and you're just going to look better and feel better in general. If you get a six pack, great. And if it's just flat, that's great too. But let's say that you were able to give a five step process for someone who's 30 pounds of belly fat or around there, 20 to 30 pounds of belly fat. And they were like, you know what? For once in my life, I want to get like at least a flat stomach.

• 1:01:26Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:26Lewis Howes?

  Maybe it's not going to be super defined and under 8% body fat, but 12% body fat, roughly 10% and I could get close.

• 1:01:35Thomas DeLauer?

  Sure.

• 1:01:37Lewis Howes?

  Everything we talked about, from sleep to emotional stress to nutrition to, we haven't talked about calories in, calories out, or lifting and things like that yet. But from other things we talked about, if you had to give a five, you know, bullet point process of like, this would be the foundational steps to get you started on losing that 30 pounds of belly fat, what would you say?

• 1:01:58Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, I'd say, and I've talked about this before, step one, very clear and defined breaks between meals, whether you are snacking or not. What I mean by that is, rather than grazing throughout the day and constantly keeping insulin levels high, I find it much, people have much more success by having very clear, defined gaps. So, I don't care if you're fasting or not, but eat breakfast and have a very clear and defined break until lunch. Have a very clear and defined break until dinner. Allow yourself the ability for insulin levels to come back down, glucagon levels to come up, so that you're actually getting into a fat burning process between these meals.

• 1:02:39Thomas DeLauer?

  Every time you're consuming something, you're kind of stopping that process for a little bit.

• 1:02:44Lewis Howes?

  Interesting.

• 1:02:44Thomas DeLauer?

  Right? Even if your calories are, you know, yes, that comes into equation, but you need to have these peaks and valleys a little bit.

• 1:02:51Lewis Howes?

  Breaks between consumption.

• 1:02:52Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes.

• 1:02:53Lewis Howes?

  Now, can you consume water, teas, coffees, anything else?

• 1:02:58Thomas DeLauer?

  For sure. Anything, anything zero calorie. I mean, it's, yeah, it's, I think, once you, and that's, people will naturally eat less doing that too. But I do think that we have to take little bits from the calories equation and little bits from carb insulin model and meld them together, instead of having these two camps that are largely opposed. And that's where I say, hey, this seems like an equal, delicate, thoughtful acknowledgement of both sides. You're probably going to eat less by having these clear, defined meals, but you're also taking into account letting insulin levels come back down nice and low, and you're not keeping them chronically elevated, which you know is not good either.

• 1:03:29Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:29Thomas DeLauer?

  So that's usually rule number one.

• 1:03:31Lewis Howes?

  Okay, step one.

• 1:03:32Thomas DeLauer?

  And step number two is very similar, but I say, have a minimum, like 12-hour break between your last meal of the day and your first meal of the day.

• 1:03:42Lewis Howes?

  12-hour fasting minimum.

• 1:03:44Thomas DeLauer?

  And it's not really a fast, right?

• 1:03:45Lewis Howes?

  Sleep and don't eat after eight.

• 1:03:47Thomas DeLauer?

  Exactly. I feel like, you know, there's a reason why. You get your blood work done after a 12-hour fast, right? Things tend to come back down to homeostasis. Give yourself a chance to get back down to this balance. There's a multitude of different reasons why it's beneficial. Insulin levels getting lower, insulin sensitivity getting much better. So the food that you do eat with breakfast is going to be much more, you know, able to be taken up and utilized, which leads into step three. Breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, dinner like a pauper, right? So you're kind of tapering as the day goes on. So larger meals in the morning, if you're not fasting, which we'll talk about here later. If you're not fasting, having a larger meal in the morning is generally going to be better.

• 1:04:30Thomas DeLauer?

  And if you look at the research, it's very, very clear that people that have a larger breakfast end up eating smaller lunches and smaller dinners naturally.

• 1:04:39Lewis Howes?

  Because they feel satiated, right?

• 1:04:40Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, it's, and that doesn't mean that you go eat a box of Fruit Loops or Cheerios for breakfast, right? And with that, I'll kind of dovetail into a slightly different piece that kind of coincides with that. Okay, there was a BMC Medical Genomics Study, that's probably one of my favorite studies, that demonstrated that you can have higher fat content in the morning because you end up starting the day with more insulin-sensitive muscles and less insulin-sensitive fat cells. What that means is you have less likelihood of storing fat as fat in the morning. And that way, you start your day with higher fat, higher calorically dense meals. So maybe steak and eggs, something like that, without a bunch of hyper-palatable carbs, right?

• 1:05:21Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 1:05:22Thomas DeLauer?

  Something that's calorically dense. And then as the day goes on, taper calories. Carbohydrates are lower calorie than fats, even though they do spike your glucose and spike your insulin. It's okay to have those at night if you're not overdoing it. So a lot of times what I will do is I will have a higher-fat breakfast. I will have something like steak and eggs for breakfast, or usually like steak and like ground beef. I'm a big fan of like that Joe's scramble kind of thing that you do, right? With like a little bit of goat cheese, a little bit of feta, maybe some like lox, make it very Mediterranean. And that, that's pretty high fat, so it's calorically dense, right? It ends up being like 800 calories, right? Then as the day goes on, like slightly smaller lunch, and if I am having carbohydrates, they're usually allocated to the evening time. That doesn't mean I'm having cakes and pies.

• 1:06:05Thomas DeLauer?

  It means maybe I'll have some lentils, maybe I'll have some, you know, something Mediterranean, right? Then, you know, that's going to naturally be lower calorie because there's not as many fats in it, right? So your day is just kind of going like this.

• 1:06:16Lewis Howes?

  What's the? Breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince.

• 1:06:19Thomas DeLauer?

  Dinner like a pauper.

• 1:06:20Lewis Howes?

  Like a pauper, gotcha.

• 1:06:21Thomas DeLauer?

  Yep, so you just, and that's a, you know, just age-old wisdom, right?

• 1:06:25Lewis Howes?

  There you go.

• 1:06:25Thomas DeLauer?

  It's like, that's.

• 1:06:26Lewis Howes?

  Small dinner, yeah.

• 1:06:27Thomas DeLauer?

  I remember my, you know, I'm largely like Mediterranean, I'm mostly Italian, so it's like I look back at that and like my grandmother was always kind of saying like she always had these light dinners, these little teeny dinners, right? It was just, like, and you look at a lot of the Mediterranean cultures and with the exception of when they're having big feasts and stuff for special events, like a lot of times they are having really small dinners, right? And they're like shutting it down right after dinner. It's like, maybe they'll have a little bit of coffee or whatever it is they're having and then, you know, go right to sleep.

• 1:06:54Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:55Thomas DeLauer?

  Which, and then you go to step four is, you know, your diet should optimize your sleep, right? That's something that we kind of talked about in the beginning, but the best way that you can optimize your sleep without really digging super deep into what is stressing you out and causing this sort of internal battles that might be keeping you up. You know, cutting your food out a few hours before bed is usually very, very powerful for people. And that, again, it nicely coincides with everything I'm talking about. Again, if you're having those 12-hour breaks between dinner and breakfast, well, then the earlier you eat your dinner and cut it down, shut it down, the earlier you can eat breakfast the next day, right? If you stop eating dinner at 6:00 PM, you're done eating, then by 6:00 AM, you're good to eat again.

• 1:07:38Thomas DeLauer?

  And chances are you're not going to roll out of bed at 5:59 and immediately go eat at 6:00. You're probably going to naturally end up fasting longer. And you don't have to be a quote-unquote intermittent faster. You're naturally kind of, you know, getting into that category, right?

• 1:07:50Lewis Howes?

  Okay, and number five?

• 1:07:52Thomas DeLauer?

  And number five, and this is something that you pull the throttle on or hit the throttle on occasionally, right? You want to temporarily, like when it's time to really pull that lever, temporarily reduce fats and then bring them back up, right? So that's sort of my lever, right? If I'm following all four of these lifestyle principles and things are working but not working as fast as I want, what I will temporarily do is reduce fats out of the diet, even if I'm low carb. Okay, this, it sounds crazy, right? But then bring them back in once weight has started to come off. People forget that even if you're doing, and I'm largely a low carb guy, so I catch heat for saying this sometimes, but fats are still calorically dense.

• 1:08:33Thomas DeLauer?

  So it's the easiest lever to pull from a food volume standpoint to dramatically reduce calories really quick.

• 1:08:39Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:40Thomas DeLauer?

  And then be able to bring them back because what you don't want to do is you don't want to have just this point where you're chronically restricting calories forever and ever and ever. And then the moment that you do come back up, your body's like, oh, shoot, put the weight back on.

• 1:08:53Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, it's not fun.

• 1:08:54Thomas DeLauer?

  I actually think, and there's recent research to back this up, that keeping calories moderately high and then having aggressive, short-term drops, like reducing fats and running calories low for a couple of days and then back up, can actually be very, very effective, which is probably why fasting works so well for a lot of people that just do it at random.

• 1:09:13Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:13Thomas DeLauer?

  Like they'll just be like, I'm eating six days per week normal, and then I do a 24-hour fast once per week. It's great because you're never letting your body get accustomed to this decline in calories. You're just like, status quo, status quo, whoa, what's going on? And then back up to normal.

• 1:09:26Lewis Howes?

  Who do you recommend fasting for and who do you not recommend it for?

• 1:09:30Thomas DeLauer?

  I don't think there's many people that shouldn't do fasting to a certain degree, right? But there's a large degree of different kinds of fasting.

• 1:09:37Lewis Howes?

  There's 24-hour fasting, there's 16.

• 1:09:39Thomas DeLauer?

  Exactly. And like a 16-hour fast, you know, if you want to put the label on it, you can call yourself intermittent fasting, but there's a lot of people out there that are probably intermittent fasting that don't know they're intermittent fasting, right? So 16 hours is pretty, I think the benefits start at 16 hours. So someone doing a 16-8 fasting, that usually works, but the reason that that's working is for two simple reasons: caloric restriction and insulin being lower. Nothing magical is happening with a 16-hour fast, but when you start creeping over that 16-hour mark is when the benefits start to kick in. So I personally, like I fast usually three days per week with like a 20 or 21-hour fast. Like, so I'm still eating like two meals and I just do it three days per week, so it's kind of intermittent. I can't think of a lot of people that wouldn't have success doing that.

• 1:10:23Thomas DeLauer?

  Because almost everyone that even thinks they wouldn't be able to do it. They might get hungry the first couple of times, then after that, it's a cakewalk. You know, it's not. Now, people that have serious hypoglycemia issues, they should probably be conscious of it. That being said, and full disclaimer, I'm not a doctor, I'm not a dietitian. But even people that are dealing with hypoglycemia, a lot of times getting their bodies adjusted to periods of time without food is actually a good thing. Because it teaches their body to be able to utilize alternative fuel sources. So they're not reliant on this undulation in glucose. You know, there's certain people that, you know, if you're very, very, very, very active, then yeah, it might not work for you. Like someone that's working crazy manual labor construction.

• 1:11:07Thomas DeLauer?

  I'm sure there's different situations, clinical conditions, that people shouldn't fast. And those, yeah, defer to your doctor. But as far as general people, I can't really think of anyone that wouldn't get some benefit out of it, even if it's just mentally.

• 1:11:21Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, and maybe there's an age range of like, under 10, you're not, I don't know, or over 70 or something, you know, I don't know, but.

• 1:11:28Thomas DeLauer?

  And it's a balance, you know, since we were talking about longevity in the beginning, like, it's a balance, right? Like, what is, is not often talked about, which is so important, is the yin and the yang of fasting for longevity while not taking it so far that you're jeopardizing muscle mass.

• 1:11:43Lewis Howes?

  Exactly.

• 1:11:44Thomas DeLauer?

  And someone that is over 70, that's a very fine line, because you're going to be at a higher rate of catabolism and muscle breakdown. If you start aggressively fasting over 70, like, where's your line of diminishing return where you're actually depleting muscle mass that's actually hugely beneficial for keeping you alive, you know? And then also same with like, a younger person, where it's like, you're in this critical developmental stage where everything is firing at warp speed, and you don't want to disrupt that. But again, like, how many, you know, cultures like, have to go out and hunt for food and their kids don't get food until... So, from a disclaimer standpoint, I don't think kids should fast, but who knows, right?

• 1:12:23Lewis Howes?

  Sure, sure.

• 1:12:25Lewis Howes?

  What is your position on working out, burning quote unquote calories, I guess, and also just consuming less or the right kind of calories on losing weight and building muscle?

• 1:12:38Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah. Okay, so this is an interesting one because deficit in general is very vague, right? So if you ask anyone in the nutrition community, they're mostly gonna say, most of them are gonna say, yeah, it's a caloric deficit that matters, right? But there's two ways to go about a deficit, a nutritional deficit or an exercise-induced deficit. Is one better than the other? From what I've looked at generally and what I've experienced, you're quote unquote fluxing, and I'll explain this fluxing, F L U X, it's called G flux, at a higher capacity when you are inducing a deficit at an exercise level because you have more metabolic activity happening.

• 1:13:21Thomas DeLauer?

  So it's like if I was sitting on my couch just starving myself, I have a hard time wrapping my head around the idea that that is good, right? I think activity matters. There's a fine line of what's too much. But so there's something called G flux, and G flux is essentially where it takes energy to burn more calories. So if you eat 2,000 calories and I eat 5,000 calories, and you expend 2,000 calories and I expend 5,000 calories, on paper, it would look like we're both at net zero, right? Okay, not the case. I have actually burned more calories because there is an energy demand associated with sort of the mobilization. I call it like a mobilization fee, like you always have to pay a fee if someone comes out to change a windshield or five windshields.

• 1:14:06Thomas DeLauer?

  You're gonna pay more to have them change one windshield typically because they pay that mobilization fee. I'm having to mobilize more metabolic activity and that alone, the flux of that actually has an energy demand. And there's been plenty of research to back this up. So someone that's consuming 5,000 and burning 5,000 actually burns way more than someone that's eating 2,000 and burning 2,000 because of the energy flux. So...

• 1:14:29Lewis Howes?

  And your body probably keeps burning after you burn more.

• 1:14:32Thomas DeLauer?

  Yes.

• 1:14:33Lewis Howes?

  Because you've had to spend more energy to burn those 5,000.

• 1:14:36Thomas DeLauer?

  Totally.

• 1:14:37Lewis Howes?

  So your body just doesn't shut off. It just continues to burn for probably so many more hours.

• 1:14:41Thomas DeLauer?

  Hundred percent. And like Alan Argon had put it in an interesting way. And he was like, yeah, like if there's someone that is like, and if, obviously, being around professional athletes... You can almost feel an energy that they have that is different from someone that is like, let's say, wasting away on a hospital bed. There's literally a different energy that is given off. Like, we, and that sounds woo-woo witch doctor-y, but it's not. It's like, they are fluxing at a different capacity. Like, their caloric intake is high, their expenditure is high, everything is buzzing, right? Compared to someone that is like, withering away and dying. It's just a different energy and different demand. And that G flux is very

• 1:15:18Thomas DeLauer?

  real. But with that G flux, you have to ask, is there so much burning, so much activity, so much oxidative stress, are they actually negatively impacting their lifespan?

• 1:15:32Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 1:15:32Thomas DeLauer?

  Because you're increasing this overall, like, burn hot, die young, sort of thing. That remains to be seen. So I'd like to say, I think it's a delicate balance of in-between. I think periods of nutritional deficit, and then periods of exercise deficit. And kind of like, balance it out. If you want to get really like, granular about it, like, try to, try to figure it out. What works for you. Do a schedule of it. Because I just try to follow it naturally. There's periods where I just don't have the energy to push it really, really hard in the gym. So I throttle my deficit nutritionally. And then there's times where I feel like an animal, and I can train really hard for like, a month or two. And then I'll eat more, and I'll let my deficit be driven by exercise. So I think there's a balance of doing a little bit of both. Exercise definitely drives metabolic changes,

• 1:16:16Thomas DeLauer?

  like, you know, exorekines and all these different things that trigger changes in our genes, that are tremendous for, tremendous for longevity.

• 1:16:25Lewis Howes?

  Sure, sure.

• 1:16:25Thomas DeLauer?

  I think there's a big, big discussion to be had there.

• 1:16:29Lewis Howes?

  If someone's looking to build muscle, what do you think the key things that they should focus on should be?

• 1:16:33Thomas DeLauer?

  I think stimulation, number one. I think, we've seen, I had Dr. Tommy Wood on my channel not that long ago, and it was so interesting to talk to him about this, because stimulation, and stimulating the muscle is the most important thing, above even, like, calories for building muscle. There have been interesting research papers that I've seen, that people in a caloric deficit, as long as protein needs are met, and muscle stimulation is there... They build muscle, even if they're in a deficit, right? So their overall weight loss might go down because they might lose fat. So thermodynamics are still applying here. But hypertrophy is happening somewhat independently of being in a caloric surplus or not. So all that has to do with is protein and stimulus. Protein and stimulus.

• 1:17:17Thomas DeLauer?

  So if you really wanted to simplify it, it is that. You know, and it's consistent stimulus, consistently putting tension on the muscle. Because it's as simple as, and again with fasting, I say it's so important to be moving your muscles and moving your body while you're fasting. Because it's demand, like you're creating a demand. Like if you are not moving and you're in a caloric deficit, the body is going to deem the muscle that you have as metabolically irrelevant and not something that's important. If you are moving your body during a fast or a deficit, your body is going to say, okay, even though we don't have a lot of food on hand, clearly this dude is using this tissue, so save it. Don't burn it, right?

• 1:17:56Lewis Howes?

  Burn the fat around it, but not the muscle.

• 1:17:58Thomas DeLauer?

  Because this is clearly evolutionarily like important, or from a survival standpoint. On the contrary, if you are starving, you're fasting yourself and you're laying down, the body's going to say, well, this muscle's metabolically expensive. Why are we paying all this energy to keep that around? Keep the fat because that's going to be good for survival. So holy people say fasting is going to break down muscle and store fat. That's actually probably true if you don't move much, but if you move, it flips completely. So for building muscle in a normal sense, for someone that's not fasting or anything like that, it's still protein and stimulus. Protein and stimulus.

• 1:18:35Lewis Howes?

  And what would be the, what would are the, the, the training or nutritional mistakes that you made earlier in your career, in your life, that I wish you would have known then that you know now?

• 1:18:48Thomas DeLauer?

  It's a good question. And you know, what I would have changed for one is I definitely would have paid more attention to prioritizing protein. I went a very long time prioritizing carbohydrates because the muscle building magazines told me that carbohydrates are what build muscle. And I think I spent a lot of years driving myself into insulin resistance and ultimately even prediabetes and eventually touching into diabetes doing that. And it set a bad framework for me. So I wish I had a prioritized protein. I think I would have saved myself a lot of metabolic heartache. You know, other things, I wish that, well, I don't, I don't wish I did anything differently. But if I were to start today, I definitely would not have been doing six meals per day. Right? Like the whole, you gotta eat six meals per day because that's how you keep

• 1:19:32Thomas DeLauer?

  your metabolism going. Like that, that made me a slave to food. And the thing that I do regret about that is all the wasted time of my youth that I was carrying around Tupperwares.

• 1:19:43Lewis Howes?

  Meal prepping and backpacks and all the food.

• 1:19:45Thomas DeLauer?

  It just wasn't necessary. It just wasn't even necessary. I mean, you look at like Stan Efforting, who's a brick house. Like the guy is a monster. And he eats like two or three square meals per day. And even he is like a massive bodybuilder with a huge following that is just like, oh, like I eat three square meals per day. I don't eat six meals. And it's just, yeah, it's like all those wasted years of just like schlepping this food around, prepping when I could have just had breakfast, lunch and dinner and just allocated protein accordingly.

• 1:20:11Lewis Howes?

  Right. Yep. It's a good principle, man. You've got a lot of information on your YouTube channel, which is really inspiring. I want people to make sure they go subscribe over there. Thomas Delauer Official over on YouTube. I think you're almost 3 million subscribers now, right?

• 1:20:27Thomas DeLauer?

  That's like 3.3 now.

• 1:20:28Lewis Howes?

  3.3?

• 1:20:28Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah, it's growing fast.

• 1:20:29Lewis Howes?

  Get updated your bio. 3.3, you know, 15, 20 million viewers a month. Make sure you guys check out his YouTube. Again, youtube.com/thomasdelauerofficial. You're also all over social media, TikTok, Instagram, things like that. How else can we be of service to you if we want to learn more about optimizing our health?

• 1:20:48Thomas DeLauer?

  Yeah. I mean, I always tell people, people can be of service to me by voting with their dollars at the grocery store. Sounds kind of inadvertent and weird. But the thing is, is like the more that people Buy the foods that are healthy. That's going to change industry and that's going to change media and that's going to change everything and that helps me because at the end of the day, I'm producing videos and getting views and if people are getting interested in that, that helps me. But it also helps everyone, like if you're eating clear and thinking clear, we're making better decisions as a society, like we're not making decisions with inflamed foggy brains, like it's like, why, why would you do that? Like, like, it's like making a decision when you're sleep deprived. It just doesn't make sense, right? So that's the best way that people can help me.

• 1:21:32Thomas DeLauer?

  I mean, I don't, I don't want you to just come to my channel and watch my videos because it helps me. I want you to make bigger decisions in your life because that will indirectly affect all of the people that are in this industry.

• 1:21:42Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, it's beautiful, man. I want to acknowledge you before I ask the final two questions. I want to acknowledge you, Thomas, for the transformation you've had. You know, I think it's hard to go through the transformation that you had when you're conditioned to consume and eat and the things that you did and a lot of people do. So for you to be the guinea pig, to transform and get to the, the place of health you're at now is really inspiring. I also want to acknowledge you for your, your realness of being a six and a half in the self-love and peace scale and knowing that there are still stuff for you to improve and work on and emotionally reflect on from your past that will support you and optimize your health even more and your relationship with yourself.

• 1:22:24Lewis Howes?

  So I acknowledge you for your, your realness in this conversation. I appreciate your honesty. This is a question I ask everyone at the end called the three truths question. So imagine it's your last day on earth, many years away. You get to live as long as you want, but eventually you gotta call it quits in this life. You accomplish everything you want to accomplish, but you gotta take all of your content with you. So anything you ever say, create or put out in the world, audio, written, video, it goes somewhere else when you die. So no one has access to your information or your message, but you get to leave behind one final message with three lessons, three things you know to be true from everything you've experienced in your life.

• 1:23:08Lewis Howes?

  This is all we would have to remember you and your lessons by. What would be those three truths for you?

• 1:23:14Thomas DeLauer?

  Number one is. Remember that this is what it feels like right now. And that is that, because I tell myself that all the time and it's, it brings me back to life. Right? If I'm in pain, if I'm sad, this is what it feels like right now. This isn't what it feels like five minutes from now. This isn't what it feels like 10 minutes from now. All right, this is, this is right now. The next one's a little bit more cliche, but hug your family often. There's just what it does for you emotionally, what it does to your guilt. Your guilt goes away. It's, it's not to mention oxytocin and all these other metabolic and, and different hormonal things that happen. Just hug your family and value them as much as you possibly can.

• 1:23:57Thomas DeLauer?

  Because it's one thing that I've learned even in my relatively short time here on earth is I just feel better when I hug my kids. And I feel better when I hug my wife and be okay with that. And then I think my message to men especially is it is more masculine to be okay with your emotions. And it's more masculine and it takes more confidence and more manhood to be okay with that than it does to masquerade it. And to just put on the tough guy act. The true tough guy act is being able to be real with yourself and look in the mirror and recognize when you're sad. Recognize when you're happy, recognize when you're screwing up and apply that to your life. Versus putting up a veil and calling it a day.

• 1:24:40Lewis Howes?

  That's great, man. Final question, Thomas, what's your definition of greatness?

• 1:24:46Thomas DeLauer?

  My definition of greatness is laying your head on the pillow every single night, feeling like in that day, you have given it your all and you can rest your head on that pillow, knowing that what you put out into the world is exactly what you would want to receive.

• 1:25:00Lewis Howes?

  I hope today's episode inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a rundown of today's show with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me as well as ad free listening experience, make sure to subscribe to our greatness plus channel on Apple podcast. If you enjoyed this, please share it with a friend over on social media or text a friend, leave us a review over on Apple. Podcast and let me know what you learned over on our social media channels at Lewis Howes. I really love hearing the feedback from you and it helps us continue to make the show better. And if you want more inspiration from our world-class guests and content to learn how to improve the quality of your life, then make sure to sign up for the

• 1:25:42Lewis Howes?

  Greatness newsletter and get it delivered right to your inbox over at greatness.com/newsletter. And if no one has told you today, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.