Giggly Squad
Hosted by Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo
Paige has been poisoned and Hannah is soft launching her husband. subscribe to our newsletter
13,406 words · 3 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
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This episode is sponsored by Cars.com. I feel like your car says a lot about you. It's transportation, storage, and honestly, kind of a personality test. Maybe you need something for weekend road trips, something you can actually parallel park in the city, or just enough trunk space for an emergency outfit and backup shoes. Personally, I like options and I'm very specific. So this is where Cars.com comes in. Cars.com has the tools that make your car shopping way less overwhelming. With more than 200 advanced search filters, you can narrow things down based on what actually matters to you. Deal badges help show how fairly a vehicle is priced, so you can browse with more confidence and fewer chaotic tabs open, which I think we can all appreciate. Start your search with Cars.com. Where to next?
I was thinking about how women have so many little things we have to do when we're getting home that you have to be aware of.
Like so many people have my location.
And you have to share your ETA, you have to check the route, you have to text everyone I'm home.
And if your friend like doesn't text you, "Oh, you got home," you're calling the FBI.
Yep. Yep. And we joke about it because it's so normal to us, but you're constantly paying attention. And even when you're exhausted and just want to get home, your brain still has to be on. You're like, is this guy going the right route? Am I in the right place? Who's around me? What's happening?
Yeah, there's truly no clocking out of your safety.
And that's why riding in a Waymo feels different. It's an autonomous ride with an empty driver's seat. So once you get in, you have this private space that's actually just yours.
And you know, I love alone time, and I truly feel like it's such a luxury in a Waymo.
Especially after being social. Like, I love everyone, but like...
Please, nobody speak to me.
Like, give me 20 minutes. I want music, the right temperature. There's no compromising, and you can customize the ride, put on your own music, answer texts you ignored all night, stare out the window. You actually have a minute where you're not thinking about everyone else.
And that's the thing. It's not even necessarily about doing something. Sometimes it's just, you want to sit there and not speak.
And put your guard down for a second and feel safe.
Which truly women deserve.
We deserve to disassociate safely for 20 minutes.
Yeah, I mean, put that on a t-shirt, for real.
And obviously, safety is a huge part of why that feeling matters. Knowing Waymo's safer. There's something refreshing in having that space where you can just be yourself and let Waymo handle the driving.
And we spend enough of our lives being on.
Exactly.
We don't need to be on in the car.
Getting around shouldn't require so much mental energy. And if this sounds like your ideal way to get around too, download the Waymo app and use code GIGLY to get 20% off your next two rides. You could check out the full terms in the app.
We love a discount.
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Sup, gigglers?
Gary, fix your wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.
I mean, the day just got away from me.
Hello, my gastrointestinal gigglers.
Paige, how are you?
I'm peeing from my asshole. That's... That's how I fucking am.
I'm the most annoying person to go on vacation with. Like, I truly must be a menace.
You were complaining about not eating enough at dinner. Now you've ate and are dealing with the repercussions. But what happened?
So I'm at dinner last night, we're getting appetizers, I see meatballs on the menu.
You sent me a photo of them.
I go, "Look how gorgeous these balls are."
And I wrote adorable, "I love a little ball."
I take a bite, I'm like, "Oh my god, this is so good." I, I, my brother gets the same thing, I look over at my mom, I'm like, "You have to have one of these meatballs." I'm a whole meatball in, okay? I cut another one in half, I give it, put it on my mom's plate. It's red sauce on the meatballs, so I'm thinking, "Nothing." My mom looks at it and she goes, "I don't think this is cooked." And my whole face goes white, I'm like, I'm like, "What do you mean it's not cooked?" And my brother looks at me and he's like, "It's not that big of a deal, like beef carpaccio." Like, "Don't, like, you're literally, like, you're freaking out over nothing." And I'm like...
Also, you're in Italy, everything is good.
I'm like, "I'm freaking out over nothing." I get back to my room, I fall asleep. At like 5 a.m., I'm woken up by the own sounds of my stomach.
I said, "What a little melody we're playing."
I mean, the gurgling was, I literally woke up, I go, "Something's going on in the room next door." "What the fuck is that sound?"
You go, "There's a tornado."
I run to the bathroom, I'm truly peeing from my asshole. I get up, I'm dizzy, I'm lightheaded, like, I'm, like, I'm like, "Oh my god, I'm, I'm gonna throw up." I could throw up just talking.
I get back in bed, I fall asleep for a couple hours. I'm like, "I'm fine, I just like, my body's so sensitive, like, I'm literally, I'm fine." I go to the pool all day. I think the heat and then I had prosciutto and cheese and I thought, I know I'm fine. I can eat this. I had a little bread. I literally had to leave the pool, run to my bathroom, pee from my asshole again. Now I'm cold. Now I'm getting the shakes. Now I have a fever. I, my head is pounding. I'm like, here, and here's the thing. It is a privilege to travel. I am so privileged.
It is a privilege to get sick on prosciutto.
I am so blessed in this life that I live, but when people say I love traveling, I don't relate to them. Because my body is so sensitive. It's, I can't get thrown off or it's like.
Well, also, yeah, you don't have your vibrating plate. Like, you don't.
I don't have my stuff. Where's my stuff?
There's a lot of things that go into you existing and you don't just go into a hotel room and have everything you need, even if it's five stars.
I'm checking three Furbo cameras every 10 minutes. I'm like.
I'm such a pain in the ass.
Kitty put a little hex on you. She said, yeah, go have fun. Go have fun. Leave me, leave me at home.
Every year, there's like a, there's a pool rule at our hotel that like, once it hits 2pm, like kids have to get out of the pool.
I thought you were gonna say pool rule, no diarrhea.
I love when they write that, like someone with diarrhea would be like, you know what would be good? Being in the pool right now.
Well, I'm sitting in the pool and I'm like, I have to go to my room and fart because I'm not having a Hanna burner in Capri. Okay? I'm not Hanna burnering all over.
It's a verb now. We're about to Hanna burner this pool.
I'm like, I'm not sharding in a Gucci bathing suit. I'd rather kill myself.
Vintage. You can't just buy it if you lose it. Also farting in a pool is so freeing when it's not a shart. Cause that's just-
Hannah, this pool, like it's a big circle pool and there's like random buttons that you can press and like jets will come on. And the first thing I think of was Hannah would fricking love this. And every time I have to pee, I turn the jet on.
Wait, so where's your stomach in this moment? Where are we at?
She's just like Googling a little. She's like, I think she's like getting better, but now it's just like my head, I'm dehydrated. I'm just like, here's another thing I realized, I'm so goddamn sick of myself. Everything's about me all the time. And I think it's because I'm on vacation with my parents. Where like they're so obsessed with me. I'm like, enough with this bitch.
Yeah. You're like, can we get one other topic to talk about at dinner?
And this year, for whatever reason, there's so many babies at the pool, like baby babies, like not speaking, like not even a year old. And I've had like such-
Can't even have a good conversation. Can't even, not even a hello, how are you?
Sentence together. But I've been having such like baby fever. I don't know why. And I think it's because I'm sick of my own shit. Figuratively and literally.
I do have to say, the only time I've been wanting to have a baby is when I'm like, I wanna deal with someone else's issues.
Yeah. I'm ready to pour myself into someone else and let myself fade away.
I do think that's something that kinda happens in your 30s. Like you're like, oh, it's me again. Morning, me again.
Wait, what is that? I feel like no one-
It's called being tired. Like, and I think that's why people like to have babies and people to talk about it. Your twenties, you're like, I'm so excited to like explore who I am. In your thirties, you're like, yep, know who I am. I'm good.
And honestly, I don't fuck with her. So let's like move on. Right, like everyone talks about like, oh, your biological clock starts ticking, you get so maternal. I'm not feeling that. I'm feeling like-
No, it's more-
Let's, let's talk about someone else.
Bring another character into the storyline, cuz I'm, I've ran out of storylines over here. I'm sick of them. Um, also, side note, the gigglers wrote in our YouTube, they were like, Hannah's, this is a safe space, let your smile fly, so I'm not gonna cover my smile when I laugh, this episode.
That is so sweet.
Not because I necessarily feel safe, but because I'm at the point with the smile fiasco, or as people call it, the master disaster.
Wait, that's so cute.
It's so cute.
It's that, um-
Wait, that's adorable.
I do have to say shout out to my husband, who I love soft launching on Instagram. Do you notice, like-
You've been married for five years.
I don't put him in any photo, it's just like, you'll see his hands and everyone's like, Hannah's soft launching. So, he's my soft launch baby, but um, he's distracted me, but he's again, doing his tough love thing where now I have someone with me, so every like, every like 20 minutes, I'm like, do you think it looks better? And he's like, I swear to God, if you ask me one more fucking time, he goes, your smile is like a stock. You invest in it, don't check for a year. And I was like, what? Kind of analogy is that, but he's like, kinda low key, right? He's like, if you keep checking every day, it's gonna be torturous. He's like, come back to me in a month and check it.
Do you feel like it has, like, from when you first got it, do you feel like any little, like a more range of motion?
No, but I do feel like emotionally, I've come to terms with it a little more, where I'm not like waking up and being like, oh my God, I can't smile. I'm like, this is she, this is what I, this is my wife.
The shock has worn off.
The shock has worn off. Also, last week, my sweet, sweet, oh my God, I was so determined and hopeful. I was like, running, I was going to sauna, I was getting acupuncture, I was doing massages, I was doing micro currents.
Did you do acupuncture in your face?
Yeah, I did it in my face.
Oh, how was that? I've never done that. I've never done it in my face.
It's interesting because you do feel like kind of a rush of the blood. Like I feel like it's doing something.
Totally.
I don't think it helped.
I do feel like acupuncture is one of those things that like it doesn't work unless you did it every day, all day. Like so many girls, I feel like have recommended it and I've done it before for like certain pain. And I'm like, yeah, I can feel something, but unless I'm doing this three times a week, like, and this is a lot.
Yeah, they recommend twice a week, but also, no, I just had so much hope for myself and I was like, I'm gonna beat this. I can beat this.
You're like, I'm not a statistic.
I know. I literally was like, I'm gonna be the one girl that like tricked her nerves to not do this. Cause I, I'm, I'm working so hard at it and I care. And then I woke up this morning and I said, bitch, you can't beat Botox. This is your nerve endings.
No, it's a chemical. It's a poison.
You're done. You're done.
It is kind of crazy though, because that it happened to both of us in such a short amount of time. And I've now, the gigglers are sending me so many DMs of like different stories, like on Instagram and Tik Tok of like, it's poison. It's like.
Did you see my mom commented under our video saying, don't do drugs? Like my mom is horrified. My mom's never touched her face. Her mom's never touched her face. Her mom's mom's never touched her face. And she's like, yeah, bitch, you put crazy stuff in your face. Of course something stupid is gonna happen to you.
I do implore the filler girls to just,
do a little research, take a look, because God forbid you do something with filler and then that's it.
Oh yeah, filler, you're fucked.
That's what you look like. That's, and it's, I just like have my mom in the back of my head. Like if God wanted you to look like that, he would have made you like that.
Well, yes, I agree with Kim.
Searching the island for rosary beads. She said, I just want a nice, you would think that they have rosary beads here and they don't. She can't find them. She's literally, it's, it's ruining her trip.
I guess because the rosary, no one needs it on vacation. Everyone's relaxed. You don't need a rosary on vacation.
I don't know, but Italy is so funny because any, if you look anywhere randomly, there's just like a statue of the Blessed Mother. And you're just like, okay, sorry.
It's like me in Canada, I'm seeing like different celebrities on ads that are like really famous here. I'm like, oh, I didn't know they were big in Canada. That's the Blessed Mary in Italy. I'm like, she's huge.
Every time we go to like the pool or anywhere, my dad will say, hey, look at that guy. He's on TV, I think. And I like look over and I'm like, no, he's not.
That's just a handsome Italian man.
I'm like, he's not on TV.
Tan, full head of hair, Italian man.
He's like, are you sure? Let me get a good, another look. Oh yeah, maybe you're right. Like he literally thinks everyone we've seen is a celebrity.
Also, can we address the scarf visor that broke the internet?
I knew that my scarf visor was gonna be split down the middle. And here's the thing about being in Italy and posting content. I feel like I post more TikTok videos in Italy because I'm happier.
Also, you did say you were going on a phone strike.
And I kind of have because I feel when I post here, it's such a time change that I am so disconnected from like the comments or like, so like, cause I'm on like a different schedule. So right when I post it, no one's commenting it because no one's awake. So I do feel very disconnected from the world. Wait, I feel so disconnected from the world here that I haven't even done my skincare routines, night or morning.
Oh, because skincare doesn't count in Italy?
I don't know. I just have no desire. I'm like, I don't care not doing it. I feel free.
It's because you're relaxed.
I think that's what it is. Haven't done my hair. I've ba- I've barely put on makeup. I've done like mascara and blush.
Well, Paige, I don't want to diagnose you, but your skincare is also a coping mechanism of your anxiety somehow. Like, it's like when you're anxious, you're like, if I could just fix this pimple, everything will be better. It's like my mom with cleaning.
Well, sometimes that pimple is the problem. Okay?
So. I feel like you're putting all your problems into the pimple, but we'll discuss.
Sometimes my life is going great unless I get a cystic pimple.
Well, cystic, that is truly a volcano with a sun on your face. So I do have empathy for you. Um, scarf visor. This is also, my algorithm shows me if I, if you post, when I go on TikTok, your video comes up first. So I get you early. I don't see comments. I leave my stamp of approval and then I move on. So I don't actually know the response of the visor. I just know that I was, I felt it in my core that it was a moment.
I saw it online like a couple of weeks ago and I was just like, that shouldn't cost $200, but put it in my cart because I'm intrigued. I'm like, this is just a piece of sheer. But like, I just thought the model looked so cool and I love an accessory. I love a bathing suit cover up.
Also, you love a frill. You love a frill.
I love it. I just love the something different. Let me just try it, you know? And, but I didn't realize that the model legitimately looked like you. Like, everyone was like, this picture that you posted of the model is Hannah.
I don't know. I think people are like, you know, when someone dies and people are like, putting them on a pedestal. That's what people are treating my old smile. They're like, Hannah was so beautiful. And she was, she just lit up a room.
Like, remembering you.
And they're like putting rose colored glasses on who I was. They were like, she was just euphoric. But, um,
They're rewriting history.
They are rewriting history.
They're literally any man on Bravo. Let's just rewrite it.
Let's just change the past, I don't know, 10 years?
Sorry, that was out of pocket and I don't care because I'm thousands of miles away.
Doesn't count. You're in Italy. What absolutely stays in Italy. So my thing also with the visor, it kind of made you look like you had bangs, like in a good way, like.
I don't think I actually had it on correctly. I think I should have flipped it over, but I'm gonna wear it again for sure. I actually think I might wear it next, this weekend because I don't think it fully got its moment. I didn't even get a pick in it.
Some Gucci, which is kind of like, I don't know, I'm just like proud of you.
Wait, Hannah, I didn't even tell you, I went to my vintage store here and I got the sickest, vintage, like 90s Valentino turtleneck dress. Not really, it's like a shirt that I'm gonna make a dress. And it has these like big cutouts and it's, it's so cool. You'd be so proud of me.
I'm so excited because. I feel like you're getting better and better at thrifting. It's like everyone has their own eye and skill. And you're like really getting into it. You're in the weeds.
Yeah, well, you've really inspired me because I just think it's more consignment. I think like consignment is so cuz you're like, what was her story? What was her story that she had this like sick designer? Whatever. And then she's like, I don't need it anymore. You know, and I'm like, what, you know, I love it.
It's like she wore it enough.
Yeah.
Or she's dead.
Oh. You know, I didn't think about them being dead.
There are a lot of, you know, estate sales where like a really cool woman passes away and like she didn't have any daughters.
Yeah, that's so true.
And that was, that was her lesson.
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Right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com/go/giggly. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash G-O slash giggly. Run your business smarter with Square and get started today. Okay, autumn in New York is the season where we can finally start dressing again. Every single thing is an excuse to put on a look. Going to work, outfit. Leading a meeting, outfit. Getting drinks with your friends, obviously outfit. And as we all know, every great outfit starts from the feet up. That is why I'm currently obsessed with alleys from Sam Edelman. They're ballet flat, but a little something extra for fall. A contrasting velvet cap toe, I have them in this gorgeous azure blue,
which is like a dusty muted blue that somehow goes with everything, even Daphne's eyes. They're so cute and I'm already envisioning my next outfit. Straight leg jeans, an oversized blazer, and a little shoulder bag. Very, I just threw this on when we all know I absolutely did not. And Hannah is loving hers too. She has the Michaela, which is the Sam Edelman's take on a Mary Jane. And this season, it comes in the chicest leopard. So gorge, so easy, and exactly the kind of shoe that makes an otherwise basic outfit look like you actually tried. And there's so much more coming from Sam Edelman this fall beyond these two. Like the new Teigan and Tallulah pumps, plus ready to wear handbags, fragrances, and even a new men's collection. So basically, you can make sure both you and your man are looking good for date night.
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The cover is removable and machine washable and it's completely shed-free and made with durable double stitching, so it actually holds up over time. It's a win-win and your pet gets the coziest bed ever and you finally get your Lola blanket back. For a limited time, our listeners can get 40% off select Lola Blankets products with code GIGGLY at checkout. Just head to LolaBlankets.com and use code GIGGLY to get 40% off your order. After your purchase, they'll ask where you heard about them. Please support our show and let them know that the Giggly Squad sent you. Wrap yourself in luxury with Lola Blankets. This episode is sponsored by the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel and Affogato. Lately, I've been realizing that luxury doesn't have to mean some huge splurge.
Sometimes it's just taking a few minutes to yourself during a busy day. I have one of these moments, oh, I don't know, every day around 2 o'clock, whether that's making a pick-me-up coffee or maybe I just need to scroll for a little bit on the couch. That's why I'm actually so excited about the new Hershey's Salted Caramel and Affogato Creme Bars available now. I absolutely love a treat-yourself moment in the middle of the day and this is a classic Hershey's Milk Chocolate layered with a Salted Caramel or Affogato Creme filling, so it feels a little elevated while still being your favorite Hershey's chocolate. Pick up the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel or Affogato wherever you shop for snacks and choose happiness with every bite.
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Can we talk about Taylor Swift's wedding?
Yes.
Initial thoughts?
It felt like the Met Gala. Like, I was in Toronto and I was just kinda looking and like, it's interesting what celebrities got papped and which didn't, because there were a thousand people there. So it's funny that like Hugh Grant was the one that like we kept getting photos of and then like Gigi Hadid. Like, I wonder if they were, she was like, "Okay, let these couple celebrities post and then no one else." Um, I did get like tea like a month or two ago that it was in MSG and no one believed me. And my only real thought was, I love how they posted on the screen, like some, someone just was
like, "Get Canva, let's just pick a font." And I thought it was an AT&T ad.
Which, if it was, genius. If it wasn't, kind of annoyed, because AT&T didn't deserve that kind of promo. But like, seeing TNT...
If it was a T plus T, I feel like that might have been better.
You know, you're so right.
It was really giving AT&T and I was like, "Holy shit, AT&T real..." AT&T and Dior were the main sponsors of the event. Iconic.
At first, I thought like, "Oh, she's doing it at Madison Square Garden because like, security and like privacy and blah, blah, blah." And then I quickly realized like that she didn't really give a shit about that. Like, I think she liked doing it on 4th of July weekend, like a holiday weekend. I think that like goes with whatever album.
Someone said if they break up, she's gonna write Independence Day as like the divorce song.
I also think that weddings have changed so much since COVID and I truly believe.
In elopements?
No, I truly believe you should have whatever kind of wedding you want. I mean, you should do whatever you want always, but specifically your wedding, I think you should truly do whatever the fuck you want, like
elope, have a party, don't have a party, go to the courthouse, invite a thousand people, invite two people. Like, I don't care, it has no bearing on my life.
Go to a pizza parlor.
The only thing I have to say about Taylor Swift's wedding is the thought of four avenues being shut down in the middle of New York City on a holiday weekend? What are you talking? If you've ever been in New York City, where just a side street is shut down, the whole city is where we go, we don't know where to go. You're telling me they shut down 7th Avenue, 6th Avenue, 5th Avenue? Like, you're telling me five streets were shut down on a holiday weekend? My first thought is, what if there was an emergency and an ambulance couldn't get through? Like, this is why I hate parades, specifically just for this reason. Because if you see a parade in New York City and a street is shut down, you're fucked.
Like, it will now take you 45 extra minutes to get to your destination.
But I think she was toking on July 4th, a lot of people being out in the Hamptons, but I don't think everyone in New York City is going to the Hamptons. It's not like.
Yeah, Hamptons is for elite assholes. In what world are the majority of New York City out in the Hamptons? They're not. That's like a facade on Instagram. The majority of people that live in New York City are there for the holiday weekend. So I, that was my only thing. I was like, I'm shocked that.
This is that the city is even kind of letting this happen because I felt like it was kind of dangerous. You can't shut down five avenues.
I have a lot of mixed emotions. I feel like it's kind of annoying that she had to donate thirty million dollars to charities to try to avoid some hate on her wedding weekend.
Well, I did hear it was fifty million dollars.
Fifty million. I feel like a man getting married, like a famous man doing something crazy, like he would never have to do that. But she literally was like, can you guys please let me just have a weekend? I'm putting fifty million dollars to charity. Like, please don't.
And like, look, I'm not mad at her for wanting attention. I love attention. I've been, I was on reality TV for seven years. I think attention is amazing. But like, she wanted the attention for her wedding weekend. And that's totally, I don't, I'm not mad at that. Like, but I think people being like, oh, so she didn't care about privacy. Well, obviously not. That's any, she didn't care. Yeah, she wanted people to know she was getting married. Which, yeah, let the people know.
I do think also, logistically, her team is so good at building sets. So like, apparent, like, it was literally the same people from the Eras Tour, I think, that like, came in, built this fucking set in a quick amount of time. It's like, what they know. And it is just so funny when you have more money than you can imagine. It's almost like you have too many options of what to do. But I feel like her and Travis love socializing. They love partying. They love.
I think he loves being famous. And I think she loves showing him, like, and look how famous you are now. I think that, like.
I was gonna say, and I don't, I love his love, but, I mean, you would understand more than anyone, how sometimes with fame, you can fall in love with the spotlight on you rather than the person.
Okay, in my fragile state of shitting from my asshole.
But you can fall in love with the idea of people, the idea of your relationship through the public eye versus your relationship. And that's why I think so many extremely famous people don't survive their relationships because you can't actually see like true intimacy when you have so many lenses on you. I don't know. That was a lot. That was really wordy, but.
I think that's why a lot of people got divorced or married during COVID because you were so forced to be with that person and it was just you two. You couldn't socialize with anyone else. And I think that is really important. Like a perfect example is Zendaya and Tom Holland. Like, we still don't even know when or where.
Are they together?
Do they even live in the same house? We don't know. And I just think that I also, because I have been in like a public relationship before, I do think when you are in something, and you can relate to this, but this one's a compliment.
When you truly, and it doesn't even matter, it doesn't even mean the relationship. It could be the relationship with your mom, your dad.
Hurt people, hurt people. That's what we're learning today. Hurt people.
When you truly love something so much and you care about it, you want to protect it from even like.
I'm gonna cry.
The person on the street. Like you, you're like, you can say whatever you want about me, but if you say one fucking thing about my mom, like, so I think if you really like cherish, there are certain things that you're like, I would never want anyone to know this. Like, I would never want someone privy to this because this is just for us. And so I do think that there could be a lot of criticism of Taylor and Travis's wedding, but also like, if it works for them, mazel tov.
After dealing with reality TV where I put someone I love in a position, I, that's why I've had to scale back because I feel like I made a mistake and I shouldn't have done that to him.
It's funny, I had someone ask me the other day if I would, like, when I get married and have kids, like, would I do a reality show? And I, it was like a random person, and I was like, oh my god, that's such an interesting question. I've never really thought about that before, but my gut feeling was the thought of someone criticizing my child, like, no.
Well, the whole thing with reality TV is, I always say, people are like, why'd you do it? And I'm like, I was 26 and single, and I did it until my family started to get hate messages.
Dude, I did it as revenge. I didn't even think it was real. I literally, my boyfriend pissed me off, and I was like, watch this, I'm going on a show. And then I walked in, and I was like, wait, I forgot I was actually doing this.
Oh, god. Our Women in STEM of the Week.
Oh.
I'm on a really weird algorithm. It's iconic. It's, there are these minion contests. Have you seen these minion singing contests?
I haven't, Hannah.
So it's these just like normal hot girls that go up to a mic and then sing songs in the minion voice and language. I've never seen the minion movie, but I guess they have their own language, like elfish type thing. So these like gorgeous girls are like singing like in a minion voice, and it's getting like really competitive, and like the winners are kind of blowing up. So shout out to all the girls who are really good at being minions.
Wait, I don't get it. Where are they doing it?
In a theater somewhere.
Maybe it's Canadian, I don't know.
So confused.
You want to know what? That's actually what pissed me off this week.
Because what are you talking about?
Just a bunch of grown people pretending to be minions in a theater? No, thank you. I don't want to.
But you know what? Nothing makes me happier than a hot girl doing something weird.
Suddenly I respect her. Suddenly I'm like, oh, you've been through some dark shit if you found yourself at this point.
I'm caught up on Love Island USA and I'm done watching it. I actually don't care who wins. This season was one of the weirdest seasons of Love Island I've ever watched in my entire life. There's three men on the show that are so like annoying. Two of them, okay, they like kind of owned up to like their shit, whatever. The one guy, I mean, he's a pathological liar. It's not even like, sorry, I shouldn't have done that. He's like blatantly a pathological liar. He can't stop lying. He's like literally getting no hate and the girl who had been dumped and like fucked over and was like exploring other men
is getting more hate. And if I hear someone call them lustful one more time, I'm gonna scream. Like what in the Old Testament are you fucking saying? Stop you, Gen Z, stop using the word lustful. You sound like freaks. You sound like actual weirdos. You're on a dating show.
It sounds like Adam and Eve.
Yeah, like, okay, you sound so manosphere. It's actually really terrifying. And like, girls can kiss multiple men and not be a whore. You absolute weirdos. Like, and all the girls want this one girl, Melanie, to go back with this guy who's lied since the day he's gotten in there and then looked at the other girl who was being lustful and was like, it's really bad for you. I don't know what's going on with Love Island, but I don't, I actually don't care who wins.
Do you care about UK?
So now I'm getting back into UK and I'm starting to care more about them because, well, here's the other thing. UK is like double the time and they get to know each other more and there's more conversation and they, I'm sorry, they have more banter. We as Ameri-, we sound dumb. We sound stupid. Now, I'm not saying the UK Love Island cast is a bunch of goddamn geniuses.
No.
But they just feel more mature. Yet they just feel like they're more. Honestly, the Love Island USA cast feels like you're in a TikTok. I feel like I'm in the app of TikTok. Where like UK, it feels like real young kids, like trying to meet each other and like fuck around.
Well, my husband has been getting.
Oh yeah, he texted me about it.
Yeah, Love Island UK clips, but now he's like fully immersed in it. And it's like the, I'm not watching it. So I'm like text page, he's watching it. But we watched it when they were like fact of 50. So I keep going up to him and be like, are they saying like fact of 50? And he's like, no, that's so five years ago. No one says that anymore. And I was like, oh shit.
There have been dumb people on Love Island. Like one girl didn't know the difference between a continent, a country, a county, like she was.
You do not have to be smart.
No, absolutely not.
To get on Love Island. You have to be some version of hot.
And look, a lot of people will say it's not that serious. It's not that big of a deal. It kind of is because they just pulled a group of the same age people. And this is their dating habits. The men lie and the girls think each other are whores. And should put up with way more than they should put up with.
I can't, you guys, I want to be part of this dialogue and I want to be making fun of it and stuff, but like.
You're too pure for it.
I'm just like not lustful.
No, I'm like, what in the serpent queen are you fucking talking about? Like lustful? I, I've never said that word in my 33 years on this planet. They're like lust is like the worst thing you can be in a relationship. It's like, actually, maybe a dingbat is the worst thing you can be. Like shut up.
Bring back dig, dingbat. Bring back dingbat.
A little update, speaking of shows, I'm shooting my show right now.
How's it going?
It's going really, I'm like really excited for this show. I can't like give details. However, I am being a menace to the glam team. Well, the makeup artist, she's fully trying to like joker me and make it look like I'm like lifted and like not looking sad and everything. And then, so this one guy is the hair guy, Rye. He's like, let's do a ponytail. Which I said, you know what? Let's do it. But when they do a like slicked back ponytail, they put so many bobby pins. Now. You more than anyone would understand, you know when a bobby pin just like hits wrong and you're like, that's in my brain?
And like when you're shooting a show, like first thirty minutes, I was fine. An hour in, I was like, something's going on back there. I was just like waiting in between takes and I'm like, fuck it, I'm trying to move this bobby pin. I pull out a bobby pin, cuz I'm like YOLO, whole ponytail comes undone. It was like the important bobby pin. I know it was eighteen.
The bobby pin.
It was the main character bobby pin.
It was Mr. Bobby Pin.
Pin. That's Mr. Pin to you.
So I go, oh fuck, cuz I thought I could take it out and no one would know cuz I'm like.
Right, cuz sometimes you can. You're like, oh, this one is like.
This was not even needed and it was just, like, I literally still feel it. So the guy comes out, right? It's like rolling his eyes. He's like, oh my god. Has to redo my whole pony, stop production. My whole face falls. Everyone's like, okay.
So I know, it's like reality TV again cuz I have my mic on me and they'll like put me in a room and be like, okay, like in ten minutes, we'll have you come out of the room to like.
It's a hot mic situation.
Fully farted.
Wait, when are you done?
I think next week, but like I'm so excited for the giggers to watch the show. Like, we're killing it with the looks and I'm wearing glasses every day to like make me a different person.
To offset, yeah. Okay, I think that's, I love, I, the picture you posted on your story the other day, I love when you wear your hair pulled back like that.
Yeah, I knew you'd be into it. Oh, also, I have to issue an apology. Sorry, just going through some notes.
Okay.
I did this thing of like things that I hate.
Um, and I, I said, um, man named Brayden. And then I got, I got only like three messages, but it was enough backlash from the gigglers. I feel like I should address it. Um, of gigglers being like, Hannah, I love you so much, but like my sweet, sweet son's name is Brayden. And this like really hurt, really hurt my feelings. So I just want to say, when I say I don't like guys named Brayden, I don't mean the gigglers sons named Brayden.
We don't mean anyone under thirty, twenty five, sorry.
I want to say sorry to all the giggler Braydens. You guys are perfect because they're being raised by us, but, um, anyone already millennial Braydens, they have no shot.
Sometimes I use this podcast as like my personal forum.
Sometimes.
I really need an orthopedic surgeon.
To get in my DMs. Because Hannah, do you know what a ganglion cyst is?
I feel like my dad had that once.
Okay, look at my wrist.
Wait, that's what like, oh.
Like old women have. My grandma used to have one. I have the, look at that.
Oh, oh.
Look at that.
Dude, it hurts. So bad. That's why like I used to have to wear my wrist thing all the time because I think it was that.
You would get a ganglion cyst on your hand. That's because your hand is too long.
I was like, mom, what do I do about it? And she was like, oh, your grandma used to have that. They go away on their own or you can get it surgically removed. And I'm like, but I don't want to get it surgically removed, but I, I need it gone because it's actually really starting to hurt me. And then, then I have like an indent right here.
Yeah. Well, the good news is you're not walking around like this.
That, my dad said, oh, just to go like this. Yeah, fixed it.
Just, don't walk around like a little rabbit.
This is why I have to have a baby. I'm so sick of my own shit. Who gets that?
Yeah. Well, if it makes you feel better, I got a mole on my back. Like I don't have a mole, I've never had a mole in my life, but it's a mole on my back. And Dez was like, you should get that checked. It's cancer. And I'm like, no, my grandpa got these. Like this is just who I am now. So, but I'll get it checked.
I think you should get that checked. No, no, no, no, no.
Also, I know we're getting older. I know I'm getting older because I love, this is my favorite thing to say now. I love going, oh, the humidity broke.
I feel like that's such an adult thing to say like, you know, after it rains, I go, yep, the humidity.
That's not even an adult thing. That's like a very niche type of dad who's over fifty-five, way above fifty-five.
No, well, dad loves the weather. My mom loves the weather.
It's someone that like worked with their hands, you know, like they did something.
Saying the humidity broke is my new like, it's really nice outside. The humidity definitely broke. And then I heard myself say, I'm like, who are you? Like, they are not saying that on Love Island for sure.
The humidity broke?
No, but it definitely is really fucking hot there. And I don't know how they're like, their makeup is staying because they never look like they're sweaty and their hair always looks put together and I don't, I don't know how they're doing it. I'd also like to know what time they're going to bed and what time they're waking up, but that's my own.
Yeah. Are they allowed to drink on Love Island?
Two-drink minimum. And the Brits ruin that for them, I'm pretty sure.
But also two-drink, it doesn't say how many shots that is. Like you could do just like two huge vodka cups.
No, I don't, I don't think they give them hard liquor. I want to say it's wine or beer. OG UK, they would like chain-smoke cigs and drink. And then I want to say like season early in UK, it turned into a two-drink minimum. And I think USA just adopted that. Because if they were drunk, it'd be a very different show. Lust, the word lustful would go right out the window. I'll tell you that. Okay? Maybe we should let next season, let them get a little liquored up and show their true feelings. Here's what we don't talk about enough as women. Thinning hair is common and there's something you can actually do about it.
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Dez made me watch the World Cup last night.
I wrote down World Cup water, but I don't remember what I was.
Water, water. Oh, they're doing water breaks. That's like a drama. There's like a water break thing happening. They're called hydration breaks. That I think is for like advertising.
I don't know what it was.
Well, anyway, I did watch.
Oh, I know what it was. Wait a minute. I've lived my whole life not knowing that when athletes are playing in a game of any sort, they're never drinking water? They're putting it in their mouth and they're spitting it out?
No, they drink water.
Oh. Because everything in like the World Cup was like showing them like swishing it in their mouth and then spitting it out. And I was like, oh, why are they doing that? And then the comments were like, no one's running with a full stomach of water. But also like, how are they not dehydrating, dehydrated and passing out?
I do think it's a combination. I actually don't know about like soccer players. Maybe that is a thing that they're not like chugging water on the side, but like they have to stay hydrated to an extent. Like sometimes with tennis, they'll have like electrolyte gels and stuff, but they're drinking water.
Electrolyte gel. See, this is a whole world I was never privy to.
You're never privy to? That's why, yeah, you do all kinds. But you know what you'd love? If you start cramping, they give you a Diet Coke.
No, that's just shit.
Cause you need sodium.
No way. I didn't know that. What about Gatorade?
It's like they need even more. Then even more. Like they'll have you eat like McDonald's after just to get like salt.
Okay, now I'm actually calling the police. Why didn't anyone put me in sports? Are you kidding? I would have crushed a soccer game. Oh, I'm just gonna, sorry, I don't feel good. Let me get a Diet Coke and McDonald's.
Well, that's why everyone's like, you must have been so like fit during tennis. And I'm like, the amount of calories I was eating was diabolical. I was doing pizza eating contests after practice. I was like, who thinks they could eat a pizza faster than me?
You know what I always loved in high school? That when the track team would have a pizza party. I'm like, God, guys, you really knew the right team to join. You used to have pasta parties.
Oh, hell yeah. Car blow that shit. You know what we never talked about?
What?
The Empire State couple. You know Taylor Swift was like, guys, not this weekend. This weekend, you're not fucking climbing to the top. They were like Instagram models. Like, they were like really hot and cool and they like proposed to each other. But no one talked, are they arrested now? Like, what's the vibe?
I think they got arrested. It gets a felony.
Yeah, you know what? Hot people get bored. They have like no issues in their life. They're like, what if we just?
And let's talk about that because if they were butt ugly, people would be pissed.
No, it's so true. The fact they were hot, everyone was like iconic.
It was such a pretty privilege example.
They were ugly, they'd never be allowed in New York City again. But instead, we were like, take a photo, put it in every pizzeria, like, these people are icons.
That would have crushed on Tumblr.
Oh, yeah. But you know what? I don't love it like even becoming a trend. Like, it's just, it's not. I do wonder what security's up to on Empire State Building. Where were they?
Well, surely they snuck into the building.
They were dressed like bandits. Like, the first time they walked in, I would have been like, that looks like a bank robber.
And then what? They slept there the night before and then like snuck out onto the top? Like, I don't even get the logistics of it. And also, like, yeah, that's really scary. If this hot little brunette with a bob can get past the security, I'm worried. Yeah, I am worried.
Taking a selfie up there, I would have dropped my phone.
No, I would have been so clumsy. Also, I would have been like, no. Well, you and I are similar. We have no adrenaline rush-seeking vibes whatsoever.
You're so right. Also, I feel like I got married, like, generations ago.
Yeah, you've been married for 20 years.
My wedding was not in this millennia. Like,
I would have done it so differently. It is so funny how like five years can change.
What would you have done different?
I mean, it was perfect, but like, I feel like my fashion's so different now. Like, I would have done like a something crazy. I would have, I don't know, I literally went to a strip mall and was like, that looks good on my body.
No Hannah, you picked the first dress you tried on.
I picked the first, which, which, iconic.
Which some people say, when you know, you know.
When you know, you know. Um, and I would have eloped.
I could have seen you doing the courthouse and then having a dinner after.
Yeah, I, that's what I would have done. But I also know what Taylor Swift felt where she was like, let's celebrate and make it a moment, like, I mean, I had Raquel at my wedding. Crazy shit happened at my wedding. So, oh, oh, the one last thing I want to say about Taylor is, she was on that, that interview show where she was like, I don't like people being on the cusp, which is true. There's like, you're really close friends, then you have a lot of people that you're like, a ton of people that are on the cusp and you don't know what to do. So she's like, so I'm just gonna invite a shit ton. But then it actually hurts more to not get invited, because you're like, oh, I wasn't even in your top 1,000.
Well, when I saw that Blake Lively wasn't there, I was like, wait, this is actually, I feel like even more of a fuck you, because it's like, Fergie's there. It's like Adam Sandler, I really, honestly, I hope that like, like Adam Sandler officiated. I don't,
I feel like it was just like, it's the most random event ever.
It felt like the Oscars.
I think my mindset would be the exact opposite, like, oh, I don't want to have to evaluate my relationships with these people. It's like, my wedding's so small, it would be weird if you got invited. Like, not, oh, my wedding's so big, everyone come. I'd be like, it's 50 people, I don't know you like that.
I almost feel like her inviting, not inviting Blake Lively, she knew would be such a story that like, she hates her that much, that she's like, I'm fine with that being the press on my wedding weekend.
Well, she could have invited her and Blake said no, but I don't see Blake saying no.
No. No, no, no, no, no, no.
I mean, look, she, I think she wanted people to talk about her marrying Travis. And that's what exactly what everyone's doing. So I don't, and I don't think that's a bad thing. Zendaya didn't want anyone talking about her wedding, and that's exactly what happened. Nobody talked about it. So I think you do what you want.
There was a really good TikTok someone made about who's like a big Swifty and she was like, just want to reiterate you guys that like, this isn't the end of the story. Like getting married is not your win in life. It's not like she went through all the up and downs for this moment. And now everything is rains of butterflies. Marriage is a huge decision in your life that could ruin your life.
It could kill you. It could literally kill you.
But also like, this is just one part of like, all the beautiful things that she hopes to do in her life. And this is not the win as a woman, is not, oh, I got a man to like, do paperwork to be in the relationship.
One of the girls on Love Island actually had a great point. She was like, getting picked isn't the prize. It's how he treats you, which, honey, if I had a goddamn nickel.
Girl, I actually get more of a high off of the guys who, um, I didn't let pick me. Cause I'm like, first of all, they, I feel like put me on a pedestal in their head. Cause they never know what it was actually like to date me. Like they never got me. So like, it's like that, like,
It's an illusion. It's like a situationship. You're like, well, you made it all up in your head. Cause you've never actually experienced it.
Yeah, like they had like one good blowjob by me and that's all they're left with. So like, that's, that's iconic to me, like.
Did I ever tell you about the time I had sex with someone and he had a heart attack?
Have I never told that story?
You've never.
No, I feel like I definitely have to have.
You've never told me. I know the time you fainted.
Like Paige, defibrillator in the closet, grab it.
Why does he have a defibrillator in his closet?
Cause he had a heart problem.
And like not, this is like not, this is not.
Did he tell you beforehand, like, this could happen? But wait, low key where you were like, if he doesn't have a heart attack while I'm fucking him, like, that means I wasn't, like, I didn't blow his brains out.
Once the dust had settled and like he was okay and we were like recovering from it, I obviously said, yeah, my pussy is.
Fire.
Like, literally, you almost died, you good. No, I mean, this is so long ago.
So like, were you scared that like he might die?
Yes, Hannah, I was terrified.
Did you know how to use a defibrillator?
No, I think, it wasn't like, I feel like people are thinking like, oh my god, Paige had sex with like an eighty-five year old man, like, no, this was like a normal aged person who had like a heart problem. And literally, we slept together one ti- it was one time, we slept together legitimately once.
First question, were you guys drunk?
Um, no, no, he like, I don't think he, he like didn't do drugs, he didn't drink, like, this was like a normal, I like, oh my god, this is so, I was like twenty.
So, second question, at what point was he like, did he immediately know he was having a heart attack, or did it like take some time?
I think we were like, maybe like three minutes into it, maybe two, two thirty into it.
But two minutes in sex world is like twenty minutes.
Yeah, you're right, actually, let's say we're, let's say we're forty-five seconds in. Maybe a minute, maybe a minute we're in.
He's like running on a treadmill.
I'd have to call one of my girlfriends because I literally can't remember and they'll never know.
Wait, sex time is true, like, ten minutes of sex feels like ten minutes of running on the treadmill, like, you're like, I ran a marathon.
I'm raw, I'm bleeding.
I think he had like a thing inside of his body that could get like thrown off and
Got it.
Like a device. And so if it got thrown off, he could fix it himself. And it did. It like got thrown off and I had to grab something and he like did something and then he was fine.
Did you put on clothes? Or were you running around naked trying to get his defibrillator? Like, did you put your cute outfit back on before you saved his life?
This is very sad. When I was younger, I was so insecure about having like small boobs. So I never like took my bra off or took like my top off really. So I think I probably had a top on.
And his roommate was there.
We thought so funny.
I'm pretty sure. I literally have to call my, one of my girlfriends and ask her because she'll remember.
I was always the opposite. Like, taking off my underwear was like, that was the final boss. But like, top off, I was, that's like, good morning.
But I also, I just don't like wearing a bra. Also, I wouldn't wear a bra a lot of the time.
Yeah, I never wear a bra. So it's like, go ahead.
That's very lustful of us. Very lustful. Wait, I'm not done with my question. So then, when you were defibrillating him, did you, was it easy? Or were there like a lot of steps?
No, no, no. He, I just had to hand him something and then he knew exactly what to do. It wasn't like he passed out and like, was about to die. It was like something was happening and he was like, holy shit, you gotta go get that, like, get off.
After he did it, did you guys finish? Or were you like, maybe we, maybe we just call the night?
No. Um, no.
Were you like, well, I need to finish? Cause like,
I was like, I, I wanna go home. I, I wanted to go, I was like, it was traumatizing.
No, he was older than me and it was like, I didn't really, no, we weren't like ever, like we were never like together, we never like went out on dates, like it was like a random hookup one time and I was just like, yeah, this is like, not for me.
In my special, I have a bit about how the true walk of shame is when you have to walk into his bedroom with all the roommates who were like playing FIFA on the couch. Like, why are there always like twenty men at guys apartments, like?
Oh my god, that's such a feeling that I like forgot. That's such a college, I haven't felt that in so long.
When you literally have to be like, I'm gonna go get dick down, hold on one sec guys.
And you're like, pray for me, you're like, oh.
It's also just like, men are so misogynistic, that like you feel, they make you feel slutty for even walking in.
Do you know what I mean? Like, I don't know, I just feel like there are situations that you get in as a growing up in a woman and you're in college where there are so many times where you're just like, I know they're saying some really crazy misogynistic shit.
Also, as a woman, did you know that like, men, most men think if you go back to their place, that means like you wanna have sex?
I can see that.
What if you just wanna like?
Well, I think it's more, I think it's, look, if I'm going home after the date, I don't fuck with you. I didn't fuck with you on the date, I don't want to spend any more time with you. If I'm going home with you after the date, it's not necessarily that I wanna sleep with you, I just wanna continue hanging out.
Exactly, where guys will take it as like, she for sure wants to have sex.
No, it's like an after dinner drink or like?
Yeah, you wanna keep talking, you wanna possibly let him touch your boob. But this is also when I was younger.
Yeah, this is like, I wouldn't do that now.
Like when I'm, when I was like, even in college, I was like, okay, OTPHJ, you get, but I was also scared.
Terrifying.
No, I'm still scared. I'm still scared. After reading the book Strangers, anything could happen. I think about it all the time. I'm like, you don't know any of these men. We don't know any of them.
I also learned a new term, which I, I don't know if you connect with, because you're like better at it than me, but I definitely connect with it. It's called post gossip clarity.
I just saw that on TikTok. I literally reposted it. I've never felt something deeper in my life. The amount of times where I've spilled my fucking guts and I've been like, why the hell did I tell her that?
So for people who don't know, it's like guys say they have post nut clarity where after they come, they like suddenly see everything clearly and regret everything. Where like post gossip clarity, I didn't realize how much in my life I would gossip to connect with people.
It's also because like you think, see it as like a vulnerable thing and that's how you connect with people like.
We're both being vulnerable. Here's the thing, there's layers. I don't feel like that with you. Like I hear your juicy story. The first thing I'm like is Hannah's gonna die when I tell her this.
If anything, I, I get mad when I don't give you enough gossip. I'm like, I didn't do well enough today.
Someone like outside my circle, I'm very like, maybe I'll give you like a little morsel, but what are you giving me back? And like I, I feel like that's something you learn like late twenties, early thirties. Like actually, I'm not telling you anything.
But that was like my mid twenties, I feel like, because you don't even know whose side anyone is on. But I would say one thing I learned as someone who's heard people talk bad about herself, which is not a uncommon thing, is a lot of the time it literally isn't personal. Like you think someone's like, oh, fuck, that person thinks that about me? And it's like, no, they were just trying to be cool with that other person.
And once you realize that, you actually get a lot of confidence in life and be like, oh, they actually like, or they actually like respect you and that's why they're trying to bring you down because they both um, put you on a pedestal and that's why they're trying to pull down.
Or they're psychotic and they literally want to be you and skin you and wear you like last year's Versace, which really happens to me a lot.
And that's why we thrift. Just do some consignment shopping and figure it out. Um, so overall, how's your vacay going besides the, um, anal fissures?
It's amazing. I've done so much good shopping and I just feel so like, I feel so disconnected that it's like so nice. Like, I forgot what it was like living in the real world and not on the internet. Like,
the more you immerse yourself in the real world, the more you realize the things you read on the internet are insane, written by insane people.
Well, when you travel, you just realize like, oh, the world is so much bigger where when you're online, it feels so small and like.
And it's also, I'm also like, oh, wow, these are the only people, plus Hannah, that I actually give a shit about in the world, the people I'm with right now. Like, I haven't looked at my phone because I'm like, the only person that's texting me is Hannah and she's working.
And she's going through something right now. Wait, I'm so happy that you're in this mindset. I also can, you're tan and.
I might skip dinner tonight and just do room service. My dad is gonna like really kill me, but like, I think I need to give my stomach a little bit of a break.
You need to look out for yourself in these moments. Um, also let the family try to talk about something else.
Other than me?
Yeah, give them a moment. It's like when I wouldn't go to school. One day I'm like, what are people talking about if I'm not there?
I can't perform in the pool. I can't perform at lunch. I can't then go to dinner and do a one woman show. I'm tired.
Callback, riff, callback, riff.
My brother, though, he, he's pretty good. Yeah.
Yeah, no, well, let him, let him, let him.
My dad's like, when are we making another TikTok? I have to figure out the TikTok situation for my dad. But you know, it's a lot.
Fucking crush. Yeah, it's a lot of strategizing.
I also haven't been taking a lot of pictures because I'm just like, I don't care.
Dude, Dez and I never take photos. I'm like, we, there's no evidence that we've ever been together. We're alive. Um, and I want to do a quick shout out. All the, there's so many gigglers in Toronto because Toronto's like really cool and full of just like hot girls, being girls, girls. Every girl comes up to me and goes. Sorry about your smile. So like immediately I don't feel rude when they're like hi and I'm like at dinner and I'm like hi. So I want to say if you're a giggler and you see me, tell me you know about the smile thing because it helps me like with the social interaction. And then I'm like at ease because I don't want to have to like tell you what I'm dealing with. Because like you don't want that.
You don't have to explain yourself. Uh, yeah, on your stank face.
And I'm giving smiley selfies with just a little kissy face and it's like, it's working.
It's chic. It's cute.
Chic and um.
We're gonna look back on this time and be like, ha ha, hee hee, funny. You know, that's not this time right now, but we will get there. We're gonna get there together.
Dez says that I'm snarling. It's a snarl.
Okay, guys.
What are those dogs?
There was a dog sitting next to us at dinner and Dez goes, that's your smile. And the dog was like.
Like a Bijan? Like my, like, one of my boyfriend's families had this dog, like um, a lobster opsa? I think it was called like a, and it had like.
Lobzsa opsa? That sounds like an Italian entree.
No, it like looked like a Bijan, but it was like had an underbite and it was like.
I look like a little dog that you could, that's biting people's ankles. That's what I look like.
Okay. And that's all we have for today.
Well, no, it hasn't gotten better, but we love you guys so much and we'll talk to you later in the week. Bye.
Hey, it's Hannah and Paige. Thank you so much for tuning into Giggly Squad every week.
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Page updated October 29, 2026 · transcript and summary are machine-generated