Luenell asks about making society better

Hilarious comedian Luenell asks Handsome a question about fighting back to make the world a better place. Plus the hosts get the hots for each other, Mae's latest escape room, true crime talk, and more! Learn more and donate: NAACP Legal Defense Fund https://www.naacpldf.org/Learning for Justice https://www.splcenter.org/learning-for-justice/Equal Justice Initiative https://eji.org/Planned Parenthood https://www.plannedparenthood.org/ACLU https://www.aclu.org/Color of Change https://colorofchange.org/National Immigrant Justice Center https://immigrantjustice.org/ Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.com http://handsomepod.com/Watch Handsome on YouTube http://youtube.com/@handsomepod and Hulu https://www.hulu.com/series/b583d0bc-eeb0-4560-8b2b-5c8ae0248a19?play=false&utm_source=shared_linkThis is a Headgum https://headgum.com/ podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter https://x.com/headgum, Instagram https://www.instagram.com/headgum/, and Tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/@headgum. Advertise on Handsome https://gumball.fm/shows/handsome via Gumball.fm http://gumball.fm/. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  This is a HeadGum Podcast.

• 0:05Mae Martin?

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• 0:18Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, checking first is handsome, so check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Let's talk about the fall. The weather's getting cooler and coziness starts to feel pretty appealing. But to get cozy, first you have to get clean and tidy. That's where Homaglo makes such a difference. Handsome is supported by Homaglo. Homaglo is a top rated home service platform dedicated to making your space clean and tidy.

• 0:52Mae Martin?

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• 1:11Fortune Feimster?

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• 1:52Fortune Feimster?

  Welcome to the Handsome Pod. I'm Fortune Feimster.

• 1:55Mae Martin?

  Yes, you are.

• 1:57Tig Notaro?

  I'm Mae Martin.

• 1:58Fortune Feimster?

  Yes, you are.

• 1:59Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 2:01Fortune Feimster?

  And I'm Tig Notaro.

• 2:02Mae Martin?

  Are you nervous today?

• 2:03Fortune Feimster?

  Our teenage teenager over there.

• 2:08Fortune Feimster?

  It looks like you grew a little mustache, pretty little lady.

• 2:12Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, I've been traveling. I've been busy. I haven't been able to shave.

• 2:15Mae Martin?

  Yeah. You sprouted a little stash.

• 2:17Fortune Feimster?

  Mm-hmm. You shaved it in a very interesting way.

• 2:20Tig Notaro?

  Well, because now I had some time.

• 2:22Mae Martin?

  Yeah, to craft it.

• 2:24Fortune Feimster?

  You got your camo pants on. You're butches F. AF as the kids say.

• 2:29Tig Notaro?

  Am I?

• 2:30Mae Martin?

  Butch AF.

• 2:31Fortune Feimster?

  Denim camo and a stash.

• 2:33Mae Martin?

  But with the most beautiful eyes. The most beautiful, delicate.

• 2:38Fortune Feimster?

  Look at those little delicate eyes.

• 2:40Tig Notaro?

  I never am told I have beautiful eyes, so I know they're not beautiful.

• 2:44Mae Martin?

  Wait, just because no one's ever said that, you think that that's?

• 2:47Tig Notaro?

  I feel like it would come up.

• 2:50Tig Notaro?

  If they were beautiful, they really stood out.

• 2:52Mae Martin?

  They are beautiful, let me tell you.

• 2:54Fortune Feimster?

  You did. They're the windows to your soul.

• 2:57Mae Martin?

  Yeah, exactly. Yeah, they're chocolate brown.

• 3:02Mae Martin?

  What's going on here?

• 3:04Tig Notaro?

  I feel like as time goes on, we become more and more attracted to each other.

• 3:10Mae Martin?

  We really see each other now.

• 3:11Tig Notaro?

  It's a curve ball. I wasn't.

• 3:13Fortune Feimster?

  But we barely touch each other.

• 3:17Tig Notaro?

  Well, when there's emotional moments, we do have awkward little pats.

• 3:24Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, hugged when we saw each other earlier.

• 3:26Mae Martin?

  Did we? Yeah, we did. Yeah. I saw, I had the joy of seeing someone without them seeing you. Like, I saw that Fortune was sitting outside a coffee shop, parked my car, got up, got my phone out and filmed like paparazzi. To see someone with their totally neutral face, they don't know they're being watched.

• 3:45Fortune Feimster?

  I had a stank face.

• 3:47Mae Martin?

  Yeah, you did have kind.

• 3:48Fortune Feimster?

  Honestly, when I'm trying to read stuff, my face looks like angry.

• 3:54Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 3:54Fortune Feimster?

  But I genuinely wasn't angry. Oh, you know what I was doing? I was, um, I was, I've been watching that trial of Caleb Flynn.

• 4:06Tig Notaro?

  That guy's innocent.

• 4:08Mae Martin?

  Wait, who's Caleb Flynn? Is that the Lindsey Clancy thing?

• 4:11Fortune Feimster?

  No, the Lindsey Clancy is a whole other ballgame. Caleb Flynn's the guy, he's from Ohio.

• 4:18Tig Notaro?

  And when she says ballgame, nothing resembles a ballgame.

• 4:21Fortune Feimster?

  Nothing resembles a ballgame. He's accused of murdering his wife and he was in an affair with this woman. And the mistress has been in court. They sent 100,000 text messages to each other.

• 4:38Mae Martin?

  I've read about that, with him being like, I'm gonna kill her.

• 4:40Tig Notaro?

  And him saying, I want to kill her. And they're Christian mega church folk.

• 4:45Fortune Feimster?

  He's a pastor or something. And he was on American Idol back in the day, I guess.

• 4:50Mae Martin?

  Oh, yes.

• 4:50Fortune Feimster?

  And then, I mean, the messages are crazy. So I've just been like fascinated by these texts between the two of them.

• 4:59Mae Martin?

  But what is his defense?

• 5:00Tig Notaro?

  So you were reading their texts.

• 5:01Fortune Feimster?

  I was watching a video of her reading one of the disturbing texts.

• 5:06Tig Notaro?

  That's why you looked upset.

• 5:08Fortune Feimster?

  So that's probably why my stank face was on.

• 5:10Mae Martin?

  So is she culpable? Like, is she saying, yeah, kill her?

• 5:13Fortune Feimster?

  It's not great. I mean, they're like, get rid of her, you know, she's, I don't, I could be wrong because there's 100,000 text messages, so I don't think I've.

• 5:22Tig Notaro?

  And which one are you on, number seven?

• 5:26Fortune Feimster?

  Twenty.

• 5:27Tig Notaro?

  Do they have all of the texts? Stephanie and I were just talking about it this morning.

• 5:31Fortune Feimster?

  They have them all, yeah.

• 5:33Tig Notaro?

  Uh-huh. But do they have them all posted online?

• 5:35Fortune Feimster?

  They're not online, but the, on all the videos, right now in the trial, the mistress is, they're having her read them in court.

• 5:43Tig Notaro?

  What are men called when they're a mistress?

• 5:46Mae Martin?

  Great question.

• 5:47Fortune Feimster?

  A manstress?

• 5:49Mae Martin?

  That's really good.

• 5:50Tig Notaro?

  But they don't have that name.

• 5:52Mae Martin?

  No.

• 5:52Fortune Feimster?

  I know, and they're.

• 5:53Mae Martin?

  Side piece, a boy toy?

• 5:55Fortune Feimster?

  Mm-hmm. An affair partner, but they need a name.

• 5:58Tig Notaro?

  An affair partner.

• 5:59Mae Martin?

  They need a name.

• 6:00Tig Notaro?

  That sounds like somebody uncomfortable with acknowledging that you have a, in a gay relationship. Like, it sounds like that's your travel companion.

• 6:10Fortune Feimster?

  The hatred the two of them had for his wife is so disgusting.

• 6:14Tig Notaro?

  Well, that's what, when Stephanie was saying that he was, listen, well, I have many things going on. I hope our podcast is slowly turning into murder.

• 6:26Mae Martin?

  True crime.

• 6:27Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, true crime.

• 6:28Mae Martin?

  That's what the people want.

• 6:29Fortune Feimster?

  You guys are asking what I was looking at.

• 6:32Tig Notaro?

  But I also want to say, if this guy is guilty, that of course is horrible, what he's done and whatever. But Stephanie was saying that in the texts, that he was calling his wife a douchebag and stuff like.

• 6:49Fortune Feimster?

  What?

• 6:50Tig Notaro?

  That, for some reason, is a whole, like, other level of like, what?

• 6:55Mae Martin?

  Yeah, just pure hatred, yeah.

• 6:57Tig Notaro?

  But even just using that word about your wife and the mother of your children, and of course, if you're killing her, who cares that you're saying douchebag? But it's like, what a loser.

• 7:09Fortune Feimster?

  It's crazy.

• 7:10Tig Notaro?

  Like, all of it, again, removing murder and affairs. But to be texting that my wife is a douchebag?

• 7:20Mae Martin?

  But it's so, maybe it's just because I consume a lot of true crime, but it just seems so rampant, the like, true hatred of women by a lot of these guys. Like, and, yeah, I wonder what, like, does the mistress?

• 7:34Fortune Feimster?

  But I think affair partners in general start to hate their, I mean, the person who's having an affair start to hate their spouse.

• 7:43Mae Martin?

  To justify it to themselves.

• 7:44Fortune Feimster?

  Because they, well, because they're full of shame and guilt and they're just like, they're angry that they can't just be with that person and it not have any consequence.

• 7:55Mae Martin?

  Right.

• 7:56Fortune Feimster?

  And it's just like, you know.

• 7:58Mae Martin?

  To me, like, doesn't the, yeah, the word mistress seems weird, but doesn't she realize that? Doesn't she realize the minute she becomes the main partner, he's gonna start to have the same feelings?

• 8:11Fortune Feimster?

  Twenty when they, I'm not, listen, I'm not giving her, she is, the things she was saying are wild. She was 20 when they met and she's 24 currently.

• 8:21Mae Martin?

  Oh, man.

• 8:22Fortune Feimster?

  But man, like, he was like on a cruise with his wife and family and like apologizing to the mistress for being there.

• 8:30Tig Notaro?

  An affair partner.

• 8:31Fortune Feimster?

  And the affair partner. And then, and then the, and then the gal was like, I don't want you giving her anything for her birthday. It's like.

• 8:42Fortune Feimster?

  Anyway, so my.

• 8:43Tig Notaro?

  Don't give that douchebag a present. I mean, I don't know if that's what she said, but it was like.

• 8:48Fortune Feimster?

  Stuff like that.

• 8:49Tig Notaro?

  What is, what, what, what is this, what did this wife do?

• 8:54Fortune Feimster?

  I'm like, like everyone.

• 8:56Tig Notaro?

  And of course, I don't mean that. I don't mean that. I'm just like, what, what on earth?

• 9:01Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 9:02Tig Notaro?

  Any of it?

• 9:03Fortune Feimster?

  Well, that's why everyone, all the women online are going, just get a divorce.

• 9:08Mae Martin?

  Yeah, why don't these people just get divorced? I guess they don't want to lose custody or whatever.

• 9:13Fortune Feimster?

  What it says, it goes back to the hatred of women and just like.

• 9:17Mae Martin?

  I heard an interesting thing, stop me if I've said this, but that, I think it was like a Gloria Steinem quote or something, but about, because statistically, it's still so rare to have women in positions of authority in politics or CEOs or whatever. Like, we see some, but it's still statistically so rare that when men do experience women, like that, they, their only previous experience of that was their mothers. That was the last time they experienced a woman telling them what to do. And so it triggers that they think it's like so challenging to their autonomy and their adulthood and like, they're being treated like a little boy just because a woman is like in charge. And so that triggers this crazy reaction.

• 9:59Fortune Feimster?

  Anyway, sorry to take us down the true crime path, but that was really bugging me.

• 10:06Tig Notaro?

  It was bugging you?

• 10:08Fortune Feimster?

  That's what I don't know what the right word is.

• 10:11Mae Martin?

  It's on your mind.

• 10:12Fortune Feimster?

  It was disturbing me, not bugging me.

• 10:14Tig Notaro?

  This bugs me.

• 10:15Mae Martin?

  Oh, man.

• 10:16Fortune Feimster?

  This totally bugs me.

• 10:18Mae Martin?

  I'm watching.

• 10:19Fortune Feimster?

  It was disturbing me. I hated it.

• 10:21Tig Notaro?

  This is so annoying.

• 10:21Mae Martin?

  I'm watching this HBO documentary Killer Story.

• 10:25Tig Notaro?

  Yes, continue with the true crime.

• 10:27Mae Martin?

  Two episodes have come out. There's one more to go.

• 10:29Tig Notaro?

  Handsome crime.

• 10:29Mae Martin?

  Oh, yeah.

• 10:30Fortune Feimster?

  We should do one episode a month where we talk crime.

• 10:34Mae Martin?

  I would be thrilled.

• 10:35Fortune Feimster?

  Watch out, my favorite murder.

• 10:37Mae Martin?

  But I'll keep it quick. But basically, this, this man and woman are killed in their homes, like 11 gunshots each, like total, like rage massacre. And everyone in the family goes, it's his ex-wife. She's been saying she's gonna kill them. She hates him. She's crazy. Even, even her kids with this guy are like, it was our mom, probably, right? So she has a sort of alibi, but she ends up going to jail. And then this woman in a small town who has no connection to the case decides she's innocent. This is a huge miscarriage of justice. She gets hooked like a true crime fan, like Googling, like doing tons of research. Her husband gets on board and they're interviewing these people.

• 11:21Mae Martin?

  They've got a framed picture of this woman in their bedroom that they pray for every night.

• 11:25Tig Notaro?

  Whoa.

• 11:25Mae Martin?

  The guy goes, fuck it, I'm gonna get my law degree. I'm gonna represent this woman and get her out of jail.

• 11:31Fortune Feimster?

  What?

• 11:31Mae Martin?

  And he does. They get her out of jail. And then now the episode.

• 11:34Tig Notaro?

  And then she kills him?

• 11:35Mae Martin?

  Well, this is, I'm waiting for the final episode.

• 11:37Fortune Feimster?

  Well, yeah, she did it.

• 11:38Mae Martin?

  She did, for sure.

• 11:39Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, she really did do it?

• 11:40Mae Martin?

  I think so.

• 11:41Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, my god.

• 11:42Mae Martin?

  I think so, but we'll see.

• 11:43Fortune Feimster?

  We want, we want justice to prevail. We don't want people getting off if they did something.

• 11:49Mae Martin?

  It's an amazing thing, though, because the, the documentary guys interviewing this couple and being like, what if she did it? And they're just like, I don't wanna talk about that.

• 11:57Tig Notaro?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 11:58Mae Martin?

  It's not possible. They're like, we love her. It's wild. And this lady's pretty crazy.

• 12:03Tig Notaro?

  You know, here's a fear that has been popping up for me in life. I'm scared that at the end of my life, as I'm dying, everyone's gonna pull their masks off.

• 12:15Mae Martin?

  Oh, my god. What a profound image. You're on your deathbed. All the people you love go, actually.

• 12:21Fortune Feimster?

  Like, everyone's not what they said they were?

• 12:23Tig Notaro?

  Well, just like, not everybody, but I just, you know.

• 12:26Fortune Feimster?

  Everyone that I'm close to, that's around my deathbed.

• 12:30Mae Martin?

  But I know what you mean. Well, it's, well, I just.

• 12:33Fortune Feimster?

  It's just everyone I'm surrounded by.

• 12:35Tig Notaro?

  Everyone I'm very close to. No, and I don't mean that.

• 12:37Fortune Feimster?

  No, I know.

• 12:38Tig Notaro?

  But just, I guess sometimes, like, I understand, you know, it's hard to be fully on the same page as somebody and have similar values or morals or whatever it is.

• 12:51Mae Martin?

  Yeah, but you assume.

• 12:53Tig Notaro?

  But also, when there's those little discrepancies, there's still a way to, like, iron things out. And, and it's like, okay, we differ here, we differ there. And, but in general, we can.

• 13:06Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 13:06Tig Notaro?

  We can function. And then there's like, these very, very stark contrasts.

• 13:15Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 13:15Tig Notaro?

  Where you're like, you've truly lost me.

• 13:18Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 13:18Tig Notaro?

  Even from whether it's murdering, whether it's calling anybody you're involved with a douchebag, like all, like, I don't, I just, I, there's certain, that doesn't, I'm saying running the gamut of like, where, where.

• 13:36Mae Martin?

  Well, every time a new comedian is outed for, you know, or, or, forget comedians, just a new, man, you're like, yeah, do we know anyone? Like, if one in three women are raped, so where are all these guys?

• 13:49Tig Notaro?

  Right. I, I just, I, when somebody says they are not capable of something, or so and so would never do anything, or I, I'm just, I've just noticed myself recently, kind of looking at people in life, kind of out of the side of my eye, where I'm like, what is actually going on? And are there any normal people?

• 14:10Mae Martin?

  That's how I feel. But then my therapist is like.

• 14:12Tig Notaro?

  Are there any?

• 14:13Mae Martin?

  Stop watching true crime.

• 14:14Tig Notaro?

  Totally normal people?

• 14:16Mae Martin?

  I felt life affirmed when I was on tour, like, or sometimes when I'm in a big group of people and I know there's a commonality or, but, and, and I try to stay hopeful, but I know what you mean. I have the same thing. But do you think that's partly why you're kind of insular with your little, your family and your close friends, like you, like, were meant to just have a small group of people that we really trust and can rely on?

• 14:40Tig Notaro?

  I think it's great to have a small group. I, I do have a small group. But I also find myself wanting more of a, I wanna start having more interactions outside of my small group.

• 14:56Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 14:57Tig Notaro?

  But also, understanding boundaries and reading relationships correctly. And being like, okay, this is work, this is an outer social circle.

• 15:10Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 15:10Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, like, we, oh, we work together. I don't need to collect phone numbers.

• 15:15Mae Martin?

  Right.

• 15:16Tig Notaro?

  You know what I mean? It's like, well, I'm, I think.

• 15:19Mae Martin?

  But having those boundaries will allow you to have more of those.

• 15:23Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, and I think that I've noticed for myself, I've, I, like, in, in friendships and, and stuff, I'll go all in.

• 15:32Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 15:32Tig Notaro?

  I'm like, we are pals and we are all in. And then I'm like, not every relationship has to be that. And I can, I can kind of.

• 15:42Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 15:42Tig Notaro?

  Sort things out for what they are, or what, what's, what's really happening, you know?

• 15:50Mae Martin?

  I have an old, old friend from when I was 13, who, and she's older than me. We've been friends decades. And she recently was acting kinda weird. And she goes, I had a dream and I don't wanna tell you about it. And I was like, oh, like a sex dream or what? She goes, no, I dreamed that God came to me, showed me a picture of you, and said, you won't know until you die how this person betrayed you.

• 16:13Tig Notaro?

  Oh, my god.

• 16:14Mae Martin?

  You won't know until after you die how this person betrayed you. And I was like, what?

• 16:17Fortune Feimster?

  Have you betrayed this friend?

• 16:18Mae Martin?

  Never. I would never.

• 16:24Fortune Feimster?

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• 17:12Fortune Feimster?

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• 17:43Mae Martin?

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• 19:02Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 19:03Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 19:04Mae Martin?

  And we have such a pure friendship.

• 19:05Tig Notaro?

  Right.

• 19:06Mae Martin?

  Like, there is no weirdness. So what do I represent to her? But we laughed it off, but I was like, I wonder if that will.

• 19:14Tig Notaro?

  You carry it with you.

• 19:15Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 19:15Fortune Feimster?

  Well, hopefully that will dissuade.

• 19:17Mae Martin?

  I know.

• 19:18Tig Notaro?

  I think I'm just, I'm thinking about, also, I was just in New York and I was having, um, I was out with our, our friend Kate McCucci.

• 19:27Fortune Feimster?

  McCucci?

• 19:28Mae Martin?

  Oh yeah, how was it? You guys hung out? Yeah.

• 19:31Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, I was, I was so looking forward to it and I was, I was really taking a moment, which I always do with her, to be like, I really appreciate our friendship.

• 19:41Mae Martin?

  Oh, that's nice.

• 19:42Tig Notaro?

  Like, she's somebody I really trust and I laugh with and we have nice, deep conversations.

• 19:48Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 19:49Tig Notaro?

  And I just, um, it's just so nice to have that. And so we were talking about, um, relationships. And so it's all kind of loosely tying into.

• 19:59Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 20:00Tig Notaro?

  Marriages and murder and friendships and.

• 20:03Mae Martin?

  Kate texted me and called you a douchebag.

• 20:05Tig Notaro?

  Oh, no.

• 20:06Mae Martin?

  Just kidding.

• 20:07Tig Notaro?

  That's such a word Kate McCucci would use.

• 20:09Mae Martin?

  Is it?

• 20:10Tig Notaro?

  No.

• 20:11Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, listen, I'm, I'm entering a phase of my life where I'm not surprised by anything.

• 20:16Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 20:17Fortune Feimster?

  And you do your best to, you know, I still choose to, to see the best in people.

• 20:23Tig Notaro?

  Uh huh.

• 20:24Fortune Feimster?

  But you just don't know.

• 20:26Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 20:26Fortune Feimster?

  You really don't know. And you, you know, that people can change or maybe there's things you didn't see.

• 20:33Tig Notaro?

  And how exciting when people do change.

• 20:35Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 20:35Tig Notaro?

  And when there is like a smooth over where it's like, well, that was actually workable.

• 20:41Mae Martin?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:41Tig Notaro?

  But then when, when you hit these other ones where it's, it's baffling.

• 20:46Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 20:46Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 20:46Mae Martin?

  I really liked the idea of on your deathbed, everyone unmask. That's horrifying.

• 20:51Tig Notaro?

  It is absolutely horrifying.

• 20:53Mae Martin?

  Short film or something.

• 20:55Tig Notaro?

  Well, yeah, and it, it, it really, all of these high-profile Lindsay Clancy case, this American Idol guy. You're, you're just like.

• 21:04Mae Martin?

  The preacher, the, there was another one, the pastor's wife. There's a documentary about just a narcissistic.

• 21:10Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, like, were they always possess this evil?

• 21:14Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 21:14Fortune Feimster?

  Did it, what happened?

• 21:15Tig Notaro?

  Did they know it was in them?

• 21:17Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 21:18Tig Notaro?

  Or did it, did they surprise themselves? That's where I'm, I'm just like, every, like, stop.

• 21:25Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 21:25Tig Notaro?

  Everyone just.

• 21:26Fortune Feimster?

  Everyone's be cool.

• 21:27Tig Notaro?

  Be normal. Just be cool.

• 21:29Fortune Feimster?

  Everyone be cool.

• 21:30Tig Notaro?

  Just be cool. You're not happy, get out of the relationship.

• 21:33Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 21:34Fortune Feimster?

  But there's a lot of mental stuff going on with people that you cannot, some people hide it very well. And, you know, it's, it's tricky.

• 21:45Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I'm listening.

• 21:46Tig Notaro?

  You guys don't do anything like that, okay?

• 21:49Mae Martin?

  No murders. I swear to God.

• 21:50Tig Notaro?

  No murders.

• 21:51Mae Martin?

  No, we're good.

• 21:52Tig Notaro?

  Pinky swear?

• 21:52Mae Martin?

  Pinky swear.

• 21:53Tig Notaro?

  We value human life.

• 21:54Mae Martin?

  Yeah, we value human life. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 21:57Tig Notaro?

  Thomas, no murders.

• 21:58Fortune Feimster?

  No murders. I swear, no murders.

• 22:00Mae Martin?

  Okay, okay, because statistically, you'd be the one to do it. It is crazy. I, yeah, apparently, like misogyny's through the roof with Gen Z as well, because of the manosphere and all, this, these like.

• 22:13Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, great.

• 22:14Mae Martin?

  Male influencers who were like, yeah, I'm reading, there's a, the Jon Ronson book, The Castle, I'm listening to the audiobook. This guy's accent is so good. Even if you just listen, he's like from northern England and he talks like this and he goes, they're psychopaths. It's great.

• 22:30Fortune Feimster?

  Psychopath.

• 22:31Mae Martin?

  And he, he always like.

• 22:32Fortune Feimster?

  Psychopath.

• 22:33Mae Martin?

  His, his character comes through, like, I think he had a hernia surgery or something while he's investigating this story and writing about it. And he always says, I let out an involuntary scream.

• 22:43Tig Notaro?

  Oh.

• 22:44Mae Martin?

  It's good.

• 22:46Tig Notaro?

  And what, oh, go ahead.

• 22:47Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, no. No, you had a follow-up. I was changing the subject.

• 22:51Tig Notaro?

  I just, um, what do you feel like are the real signs of manosphere? Alpha male.

• 22:57Mae Martin?

  Of that way of thinking or?

• 22:58Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, those people that have been suckered in by that, um.

• 23:03Mae Martin?

  It's the same as, it plays on, on fear. It's people who, who feel like their place in the world is at risk. Because we're now giving other people a place at the table, I think. So it's like, and also incels, that people who think they deserve, they deserve, yeah, attention from women all the time. I don't know. I don't know. It's young, young, have you, did you watch Adolescence?

• 23:28Tig Notaro?

  No, I heard it was incredible.

• 23:29Fortune Feimster?

  What is that?

• 23:30Mae Martin?

  This is a Netflix series that was, each episode is filmed in one shot.

• 23:34Tig Notaro?

  Oh, yeah.

• 23:35Mae Martin?

  The lead is like a thirteen-year-old boy and.

• 23:36Fortune Feimster?

  That's right, yeah.

• 23:37Mae Martin?

  It was amazing. Yeah. I don't know what to do, but it can't be on us.

• 23:42Tig Notaro?

  It's on the three of us.

• 23:43Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, damn. We need more young men to watch Handsome.

• 23:46Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 23:47Fortune Feimster?

  We'll set them straight.

• 23:48Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 23:49Mae Martin?

  Oh, God.

• 23:50Tig Notaro?

  Kate McCucci's brother.

• 23:50Fortune Feimster?

  Kate McCucci.

• 23:52Tig Notaro?

  Big Handsome fan.

• 23:53Fortune Feimster?

  Love it. He likes what we say, McCucci, a lot.

• 23:56Tig Notaro?

  Also, Kate said, she took a bit of a tumble and was recovering from that. And she said she listened to Handsome.

• 24:03Mae Martin?

  Really?

• 24:04Tig Notaro?

  And, and she was like, the show got me through. And I was like, that's so crazy to hear from like, a close friend.

• 24:10Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 24:10Tig Notaro?

  But what were you gonna say when you were switching gears?

• 24:12Fortune Feimster?

  I'm going to see The Sound of Music sing-along tomorrow night.

• 24:16Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 24:19Mae Martin?

  Probably we needed a line number for that.

• 24:21Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 24:22Mae Martin?

  You are sixteen, going on seventeen.

• 24:26Fortune Feimster?

  I'm, I know all the songs.

• 24:29Tig Notaro?

  Oh, we know.

• 24:29Fortune Feimster?

  Climbing every mountain.

• 24:31Tig Notaro?

  I think you've sung every one.

• 24:32Fortune Feimster?

  I probably have.

• 24:33Tig Notaro?

  Start to finish.

• 24:34Mae Martin?

  How fun.

• 24:35Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, that's fun. One of our early cartoons back in the day, um, was me singing that song. I've never been, this has been going on for decades at the Hollywood Bowl. And, uh, Melissa Peterman, a very funny comedian, hosted. And so, uh, I'm going, thanks to her.

• 24:53Tig Notaro?

  Who are you going with?

• 24:54Fortune Feimster?

  Amanda Klutz, our friend.

• 24:55Mae Martin?

  Oh, nice.

• 24:56Fortune Feimster?

  And her son. And then my friend Zach Noe Towers.

• 24:59Tig Notaro?

  Nice.

• 25:00Fortune Feimster?

  We're gonna go enjoy a little sing-along.

• 25:01Mae Martin?

  Are they, do they play the movie be, on the screen?

• 25:04Fortune Feimster?

  They do a costume contest. Uh, I can't decide if I'm gonna dress up like Liesl or not.

• 25:09Mae Martin?

  You have to.

• 25:10Fortune Feimster?

  Zach joked, joked that he would dress up as Liesl and I'd be Rolf.

• 25:14Mae Martin?

  Yeah, perfect, blonde.

• 25:16Fortune Feimster?

  I do have a lederhosen.

• 25:17Mae Martin?

  Oh, then you have to.

• 25:18Fortune Feimster?

  Um, and then, so there's a costume contest that Melissa hosts, and then the movie starts, you know, it's a long movie, so it's gonna be.

• 25:26Tig Notaro?

  How, what, like two and a half hours?

• 25:27Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, enough that they had two VHS tapes back in the day.

• 25:31Tig Notaro?

  Oh, I thought you were saying they were using two VHS tapes for this, for the, the sing-along.

• 25:39Fortune Feimster?

  But I, I love going to the Hollywood Bowl, so that'll be fun. But like, this is my jam, literally.

• 25:45Mae Martin?

  It's your Rocky Horror Picture Show. Like, this is your, oh, it's gonna be full of like-minded people who.

• 25:50Fortune Feimster?

  I know, just like.

• 25:51Mae Martin?

  Just like.

• 25:51Fortune Feimster?

  I was singing like.

• 25:53Mae Martin?

  Our heels are alive.

• 25:55Tig Notaro?

  I'm, I want, when is it? Because I'm surprised. Oh, tomorrow night? Is that the only night?

• 25:59Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, I think so, yeah.

• 26:00Tig Notaro?

  I'm a little surprised Stephanie, um.

• 26:03Mae Martin?

  She loves it?

• 26:03Fortune Feimster?

  It's not too late.

• 26:04Tig Notaro?

  Oh, my gosh, yes.

• 26:06Mae Martin?

  I didn't know that.

• 26:06Tig Notaro?

  Yes. She loves musicals. She loves all of that.

• 26:10Fortune Feimster?

  Not too late to go.

• 26:11Tig Notaro?

  It's not sold out?

• 26:12Fortune Feimster?

  I have no idea.

• 26:13Tig Notaro?

  Hmm.

• 26:14Mae Martin?

  You gotta go. Surprise. Sneak up behind Fortune like I did this morning.

• 26:18Tig Notaro?

  Oh, actually, we're filming something.

• 26:20Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, great.

• 26:21Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, so we're filming something tomorrow night.

• 26:23Fortune Feimster?

  Whatever.

• 26:24Tig Notaro?

  Uh.

• 26:24Mae Martin?

  I'm going tonight to the Hollywood Forever.

• 26:28Tig Notaro?

  Cemetery.

• 26:29Mae Martin?

  Cemetery. Uh, yeah.

• 26:31Fortune Feimster?

  That was for one of the movies in the, in the cemetery.

• 26:35Mae Martin?

  No, this is, um, Fontaine's DC are playing, my favorite band, this Irish band. You'd love them. They're so, so good. And so, uh.

• 26:44Fortune Feimster?

  So Irish.

• 26:45Mae Martin?

  Political and smart. Irish people just. The Irish really get it in terms of injustice and.

• 26:51Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 26:52Mae Martin?

  Uh huh. Yeah, but they're wicked bands. I'm excited. But is it in the cemetery? Have you?

• 26:57Fortune Feimster?

  Well, that, I think, is like at the edge of the cemetery. It's in a, there's, um, a building.

• 27:03Mae Martin?

  Okay.

• 27:03Fortune Feimster?

  But they do also out here play movies in that cemetery.

• 27:07Mae Martin?

  The edge of the cemetery.

• 27:09Fortune Feimster?

  That's a summer thing, though.

• 27:10Mae Martin?

  We're in the spooky month, though.

• 27:12Fortune Feimster?

  We are. Halloween's upon us.

• 27:14Mae Martin?

  I think I told you, but maybe I didn't tell you that I went to this immersive theater thing.

• 27:18Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 27:19Mae Martin?

  That it was like a vampire brothel and you go in a group of ten and then they chase you around and.

• 27:26Fortune Feimster?

  You don't love theater unless you're somehow involved in it.

• 27:31Mae Martin?

  I like to be involved and I, I always pretend I don't want to get chosen to be like the special one.

• 27:37Fortune Feimster?

  You wanna be chosen.

• 27:38Mae Martin?

  Oh, they put a bag on my head. They took me away from the group. I was loving it.

• 27:42Tig Notaro?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 27:43Fortune Feimster?

  I wanted to stay beaming when they're like, trying to find a volunteer.

• 27:47Tig Notaro?

  No, don't pick me. I think you told me on our mini-episode or whatever it's called, and I was like, that honestly sounds like hell.

• 27:58Fortune Feimster?

  I know.

• 27:59Tig Notaro?

  Like, I really. I cannot imagine.

• 28:02Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 28:03Tig Notaro?

  Going and spending, it, it's so fascinating to me. Like, you, you are a whole different kind of alien.

• 28:11Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I don't.

• 28:11Tig Notaro?

  With this, this, this interest. I love that you have these interests. It's.

• 28:16Mae Martin?

  Keeps me.

• 28:17Tig Notaro?

  Yes.

• 28:18Mae Martin?

  Present.

• 28:18Tig Notaro?

  I love, uh, your paintings, your immersive stuff, everything Mae Martin.

• 28:24Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 28:25Tig Notaro?

  But truly.

• 28:26Fortune Feimster?

  You seek out fun things.

• 28:27Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 28:28Mae Martin?

  Yeah. Yeah, I brought Parf and, um, she challenges authority, like she got the giggles and I'm like, we have to commit to this so that the actors have the best possible experience. Yeah, you'd be, you'd be troublemakers, I think.

• 28:40Tig Notaro?

  I wouldn't have the giggles. I would be like, just get me out of it. What did I call those things? The?

• 28:47Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, the, the escape room?

• 28:49Tig Notaro?

  The let me out.

• 28:49Fortune Feimster?

  Let me out rooms.

• 28:52Tig Notaro?

  That's all I could think. It's like, why, I'm, I'm gonna go sit in the car.

• 28:56Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 28:57Tig Notaro?

  Why am I here?

• 28:58Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 28:58Tig Notaro?

  Just because I don't understand it doesn't mean I don't absolutely appreciate that you love it.

• 29:04Mae Martin?

  It's weird that I, yeah, yeah, I, I do love it.

• 29:07Tig Notaro?

  I know you do, kid.

• 29:09Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 29:09Tig Notaro?

  It keeps happening.

• 29:10Mae Martin?

  They had a thing, because I, I paid extra for the, this, you could get like a VIP ticket, of course. And then they said, you could. Stay and dress up and scare the next group. And I really wanted to, but no one in my group wanted to do it.

• 29:24Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, they're like, let's get out of here.

• 29:25Mae Martin?

  We're good. We had our fill.

• 29:26Fortune Feimster?

  We need a drink.

• 29:27Mae Martin?

  At the vampire brothel.

• 29:29Fortune Feimster?

  You're like, I'll see you guys later.

• 29:32Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, it's that moment where you're like, oh, yeah, that's, I mean, yeah, we, I guess we can't. We probably can't. We should probably head out.

• 29:41Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 29:41Tig Notaro?

  So you don't get scared ever that like, there's gonna be a weirdo in those kind of places?

• 29:48Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I do for sure. I've had that experience. And, and then I think about those Universal Studios Horror Nights things where they, that's too much for me, where they just chase you with a chainsaw.

• 29:59Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, the whole time you're being harassed.

• 30:01Mae Martin?

  Horrified, yeah.

• 30:02Tig Notaro?

  I don't need that.

• 30:03Mae Martin?

  No, you, no.

• 30:04Fortune Feimster?

  That's not for you, my friend.

• 30:06Tig Notaro?

  No, I just, my episode, I was telling you, I did American Horror Story.

• 30:09Mae Martin?

  Oh, yes.

• 30:10Tig Notaro?

  That aired last night.

• 30:11Mae Martin?

  Oh, it did?

• 30:12Tig Notaro?

  Yes.

• 30:12Mae Martin?

  I gotta watch.

• 30:13Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, I didn't know that.

• 30:14Tig Notaro?

  Well, now you know. Well, no, not last night, because it was a couple of weeks ago now.

• 30:20Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 30:20Tig Notaro?

  Okay. Um, but when I was filming it, I was genuinely like, this is kinda scary.

• 30:25Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 30:27Tig Notaro?

  This is kinda scary.

• 30:28Mae Martin?

  That show is scary.

• 30:29Tig Notaro?

  Oh, oh, I, I have no, like, oh.

• 30:35Tig Notaro?

  Like, to go back to like violence and murders, that like, no, thank you.

• 30:39Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 30:39Tig Notaro?

  No, I mean.

• 30:41Mae Martin?

  We all should just be living like little squirrels curled up in our little treehouses.

• 30:45Tig Notaro?

  Squirreling around, remember?

• 30:46Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 30:46Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. And that's not to say I didn't enjoy doing it.

• 30:50Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 30:50Tig Notaro?

  It just was, I had not done a, like a, I guess, I mean, I guess I did that zombie, but that wasn't.

• 30:58Fortune Feimster?

  That's different. It's like CGI stuff.

• 31:00Tig Notaro?

  This was more like, oh, this feels, it felt legitimately spooky. I never felt that on the zombie film.

• 31:09Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah. I've never filmed a scary thing.

• 31:12Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, it's a weird thing.

• 31:13Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 31:14Tig Notaro?

  Because I, I don't know, but I'm, it's also just, I'm.

• 31:18Mae Martin?

  You know what I've always wanted to act in? That, you know, the moment in like, a Scream movie or something where the killer goes from being like, guys, we gotta get out of here. And then they're like, wait a minute, I, I thought you said you didn't know about that door. And then, and then they turn, they go, you know, they turn from being your friend and they unmask.

• 31:38Fortune Feimster?

  They unmask.

• 31:40Mae Martin?

  Like, they can't keep up the ruse anymore.

• 31:42Tig Notaro?

  Are you gonna be at my deathbed?

• 31:43Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 31:44Tig Notaro?

  And you're gonna unmask?

• 31:46Mae Martin?

  So, yeah, I'm gonna be like, Tig, we'll miss you. And then all of a sudden, I'll be like,

• 31:49Fortune Feimster?

  Glad you're gone.

• 31:52Mae Martin?

  God.

• 31:52Tig Notaro?

  Um, and so you wanna be the one that says?

• 31:55Mae Martin?

  Yeah, the one that goes.

• 31:57Fortune Feimster?

  I can see you doing The Turn.

• 31:58Mae Martin?

  The Turn, that's what I want.

• 32:00Tig Notaro?

  That's what the name of the movie is.

• 32:01Mae Martin?

  The Turn.

• 32:04Tig Notaro?

  Should we all write a movie? Let's write a scary movie together.

• 32:07Fortune Feimster?

  Put it on the list, Thomas.

• 32:08Mae Martin?

  Can we write a movie where we, we have it in a Google Doc? We only write our own lines. So we just.

• 32:13Tig Notaro?

  Oh, my God. It's hilarious.

• 32:15Mae Martin?

  You'll write a line.

• 32:16Tig Notaro?

  Fortune sings through the whole movie.

• 32:18Fortune Feimster?

  I see you talking about McCooter a lot.

• 32:22Mae Martin?

  What would a, like a cape, a real caper, a handsome caper movie be? Road trip, maybe?

• 32:28Fortune Feimster?

  I thought you were bringing up that onion shirt I wore a while ago.

• 32:31Mae Martin?

  The caper onion shirt.

• 32:33Tig Notaro?

  Again, something I wouldn't buy, but I love it for you.

• 32:36Fortune Feimster?

  I thank you for that, my friend.

• 32:38Tig Notaro?

  God, that shirt really brought me joy.

• 32:41Mae Martin?

  You're not on Instagram, so you don't know that it's a real hit.

• 32:44Fortune Feimster?

  It keeps on giving. We posted a clip of it.

• 32:47Tig Notaro?

  And people are into it?

• 32:48Fortune Feimster?

  They're very into it.

• 32:49Tig Notaro?

  I bet they love your shirt, Fortune.

• 32:51Fortune Feimster?

  It's people that are like, oh, my God, that shirt. And then other people are like, it's cute. You know, there's two camps.

• 32:58Tig Notaro?

  It's cute.

• 33:00Fortune Feimster?

  It's cute. Or people are like, it works for Fortune. So I don't know what they mean by that.

• 33:07Tig Notaro?

  That's great.

• 33:12Fortune Feimster?

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• 33:52Fortune Feimster?

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• 34:29Tig Notaro?

  It's, it's, it's, it's a solid shirt.

• 34:32Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 34:32Tig Notaro?

  Uh, did you, you said you were gonna get rid of it, did you?

• 34:35Fortune Feimster?

  No, not now.

• 34:37Mae Martin?

  Now you can't. You gotta wear it.

• 34:38Fortune Feimster?

  Museum-worthy.

• 34:39Mae Martin?

  Yeah, yeah. It's gonna be in a glass case.

• 34:42Tig Notaro?

  We all, we can all sign it, maybe?

• 34:44Fortune Feimster?

  Maybe I have to, maybe I should wear it to one of our live shows at some point.

• 34:48Tig Notaro?

  People will rip it off.

• 34:49Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 34:50Fortune Feimster?

  Because I don't know if I'm gonna wear it for our Holly Bob show on December 12th.

• 34:53Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 34:54Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, Dynasty Typewriter. Get your live stream tickets now.

• 34:57Mae Martin?

  Yes.

• 34:57Fortune Feimster?

  Um, but, because I, for the Holly Bob shows, I would think I wanna look festive.

• 35:03Mae Martin?

  I'm gonna wear a brown suit.

• 35:05Fortune Feimster?

  You are?

• 35:06Mae Martin?

  What do you think about that?

• 35:07Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, you wear what you want. I was thinking more of like a Christmas sweater or something, but, but you should wear a brown suit.

• 35:14Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, maybe that.

• 35:14Mae Martin?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, Christmas suit. Yeah, yeah. No, I'll go, I'll go Christmas sweater. Yeah, I don't need to wear my brown suit. That's all right.

• 35:20Tig Notaro?

  Did I tell you about the time my son, Finn, won, um, the ugly Christmas sweater competition? And he didn't know he was in the competition?

• 35:31Mae Martin?

  He was just wearing like.

• 35:33Tig Notaro?

  He just went to a Christmas party and wore his favorite sweater, which I also thought was so cute. And we have a video of him winning. And he's so confused, uh, but he's so excited because he gets a trophy.

• 35:47Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 35:47Tig Notaro?

  But he was like, he didn't, everybody was like, woo, thinking he understood, but he didn't know.

• 35:53Mae Martin?

  Oh, my God.

• 35:53Tig Notaro?

  It was so cute. I could hardly stand it.

• 35:58Fortune Feimster?

  He's like, this is my favorite sweater.

• 36:00Tig Notaro?

  Well, yeah, he was, I think he was just like, what do you mean ugly sweater? But he was also, it was so.

• 36:05Mae Martin?

  Like, I won.

• 36:06Tig Notaro?

  But I won. And he loves, he loves to win. He's very competitive, you know, uh, very athletic. But it, it, the, the trophy came from an ugly sweater that was his favorite.

• 36:19Mae Martin?

  What was the sweater?

• 36:20Tig Notaro?

  Uh, I'll have to show it.

• 36:22Mae Martin?

  Any onions?

• 36:23Tig Notaro?

  It was like.

• 36:24Mae Martin?

  Just a loud sweater.

• 36:25Tig Notaro?

  It's not even, it was like green, brown, pattern. I don't know. I guess maybe, maybe.

• 36:32Fortune Feimster?

  Are, are their heights catching up to yours yet? Because I feel like they're gonna outgrow you at some point.

• 36:37Tig Notaro?

  Well, of course, yes. And when kids are two, they can kind of guess how tall you'll be by the wingspan.

• 36:45Mae Martin?

  Oh.

• 36:46Tig Notaro?

  So they are gonna be coming in around 6'2", 6'4".

• 36:52Mae Martin?

  Whoa.

• 36:52Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. And Max already, when I hug him, he is, like, his broad shoulders and his chest, I feel like I'm hugging a large man.

• 37:06Fortune Feimster?

  Wow. That's gotta be a trip.

• 37:09Tig Notaro?

  I said to him, uh, I said, Max, you know, you could beat me up. And he goes, yeah, but, what did he say? He made a joke. He said, yeah, but, I'd stru, he said, yeah, but I'd struggle with that emotionally.

• 37:27Fortune Feimster?

  Good. He's not part of the manosphere. Amazing.

• 37:30Mae Martin?

  That's incredible.

• 37:31Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. But, uh, it was a little, uh, because he was acknowledging, yeah, I could definitely kick your ass. But emotionally, I would struggle.

• 37:39Fortune Feimster?

  That'd be very hard for me.

• 37:40Mae Martin?

  I can't wait till they're, like, they can pick you up. Like, they're.

• 37:44Tig Notaro?

  He can.

• 37:45Mae Martin?

  No.

• 37:46Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 37:46Fortune Feimster?

  You gotta watch out for your little ribs, though.

• 37:49Tig Notaro?

  I have to watch out for my back.

• 37:50Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 37:50Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. Um, my ribs are, are fine, but thank you for thinking of them.

• 37:55Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, of course.

• 37:56Tig Notaro?

  Because, you know, Allison Janney broke my rib.

• 37:57Fortune Feimster?

  That's right.

• 37:59Mae Martin?

  That's incredible.

• 38:00Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 38:01Fortune Feimster?

  Well, should we get to our question?

• 38:03Mae Martin?

  Yeah, let's do it.

• 38:04Fortune Feimster?

  Okay. Today's question asker is a comedian and actor, best known for her roles in films like Borat, which she was so funny in, oh, my gosh, Taken 2, A Star Is Born, Dolema is My Name. You can also, uh, see her in the TV show Hacks. You can catch her on tour and get tickets at heylunell.com. Luenell is asking today's question.

• 38:31Speaker 04

  Hello, handsome podcast family. It's me, Luenell. I'm here in Las Vegas at Jimmy Kimmel's Comedy Club. My residency is, this is my last night before I go on vacation. I got so excited around the house, I didn't even put no lashes on. I'm ready to go. So the question that I wanna ask all this, what are we going to be able to do to combat this hatred and racism in America today? What can we do to try to help the situation and not extend the situation?

• 39:15Speaker 04

  You know, bigotry, uh, hatred, racism, discrimination, what, what can we do?

• 39:26Speaker 04

  That's my question.

• 39:28Fortune Feimster?

  Wow.

• 39:28Mae Martin?

  Great question.

• 39:29Tig Notaro?

  No. Yes, yes. Really good question.

• 39:33Mae Martin?

  Well, I like the way it's phrased as well. Yeah, what can we actionably?

• 39:38Fortune Feimster?

  Solving this?

• 39:39Mae Martin?

  Yeah, what action can we take?

• 39:41Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 39:42Mae Martin?

  Because I think it's sometimes, it's such a overwhelmingly broad idea that people can feel paralyzed and.

• 39:50Fortune Feimster?

  Well, I mean, it's a, it's something that goes so far back. And it continues that it, like, yes, it feels very overwhelming because you're like, the, it's so ingrained in history and it continues.

• 40:07Mae Martin?

  It's so systemic, yeah.

• 40:08Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, that you're just, you're just like, holy cow, how do, how do we face this?

• 40:12Mae Martin?

  But I think that that's by design almost, that they want people to feel hopeless and paralyzed. And, and if you have any hope, it's kind of, then that means you gotta do something about it. Because if you think this situation can be salvaged, and I think it's easy to be like, these days it feels like engaging and participating politically is about, like, saying the exact right thing on social media. Or coming up with like the perfect summative statement. But that has really no impact. I mean, awareness is important and I think first we have to acknowledge we're in a, this isn't just like, oh, yeah, this old chess.

• 40:53Mae Martin?

  Like, we're in a particularly alarming moment where things are rapidly escalating and the dehumanization of minorities.

• 41:03Fortune Feimster?

  With all the ICE agents.

• 41:05Tig Notaro?

  It's like you feel like you, there's been some forward movement over the past several years and then it's has been reversed in, in, in like a rug yanked out from under you.

• 41:23Mae Martin?

  Like that progress is so tenuous. So I think I didn't realize and we, it's around George Floyd, we all had this like big moment of awakening where people were educating themselves and stuff. And then how are we here now with like, and we have interment camps in this country and they're like children not getting medical care in there and I mean, 50 people have died this, in, during this administration in those ICE.

• 41:51Fortune Feimster?

  You mean in custody or in raids?

• 41:53Mae Martin?

  Yeah, yeah. Okay. So I Googled, what can we do? Because.

• 41:58Tig Notaro?

  Oh, May has the answer.

• 42:01Mae Martin?

  I, I just wanted to not be like vague about it. And because I think there are, there are places to donate.

• 42:08Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah. You want to actually have some tangible things that people can do.

• 42:13Tig Notaro?

  Well, yeah. And it's of course, great to have hope, but when people sometimes stop at like, well, I hope it gets better.

• 42:18Fortune Feimster?

  Right.

• 42:19Tig Notaro?

  Or I hope that it's like, that's wonderful, but what are you, what are you actually going to do to make change?

• 42:25Mae Martin?

  A lot of like, my parents' generation are, they're like, well, I'm not, I'm not racist and I'm an ally. And that's enough, but it doesn't acknowledge, yeah, the systemic issues and, and people get so defensive about acknowledging their own privilege as well and their blind spots. And the first thing I think is to look at where you live and find out about your immediate surroundings.

• 42:51Tig Notaro?

  That's always, always right.

• 42:54Fortune Feimster?

  Like. Start locally, I mean.

• 42:56Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. It's, it's so crucial because you have to build from there. You have to, it's like, it's like, I know this is such a ridiculous thing to say right now, but how I always say you have to hydrate from the inside.

• 43:09Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 43:09Tig Notaro?

  But it's like, that's where you have to start.

• 43:11Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 43:12Tig Notaro?

  You have to, you have to start internally and then move out from there. And it's, it's the same as like on the plane, you, you use your oxygen and then, you know, if you have to get this steady.

• 43:25Mae Martin?

  There are so many local organizations and things that need support, need volunteers. So like, find out who's your district attorney, who's your state representative? Is there someone trying to remove books about black history? Is there a black led community organization that you can, you can help with or donate to? Those things. And then of course, voting is not just about voting for.

• 43:49Fortune Feimster?

  You have to vote. There's no.

• 43:51Mae Martin?

  And you got to vote in the smaller elections.

• 43:53Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, you have to vote in every opportunity you can. It is not a, uh, sit back and like, let's see how the things fall. Like you, there, there is no options anymore. You have to do that at the very least.

• 44:07Mae Martin?

  And I think you have to vote strategically too. You got it.

• 44:10Fortune Feimster?

  Do some research.

• 44:11Mae Martin?

  Do some research, yeah. State legislature, legislator, state, what is it? Legislate.

• 44:19Tig Notaro?

  Later.

• 44:20Mae Martin?

  Les.

• 44:20Tig Notaro?

  Legislator.

• 44:21Mae Martin?

  Legislator.

• 44:22Tig Notaro?

  Oh, legislator.

• 44:23Mae Martin?

  Legislators, yeah. It's a really scary moment. Like, yeah, sometimes I feel, I do feel very overwhelmed and hopeless. But then, and it is crazy. Often I'm like, oh, the world's bad. And then people say, well, not the whole world. Like, America is just in the toilet right now.

• 44:40Tig Notaro?

  We're not in a great space.

• 44:41Mae Martin?

  We gotta know. Figure out a way out of it. Instead of just, a lot of my friends were like, when do we move to the woods or move to Canada? But it's kind of just burying your head in the sand.

• 44:52Fortune Feimster?

  Well, again, yeah.

• 44:53Mae Martin?

  You gotta get involved.

• 44:54Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, just like, bye. We'll figure this out. Good luck. Like you said, we have to start in our communities.

• 45:01Mae Martin?

  I've been really inspired by it.

• 45:05Mae Martin?

  Just the other day, like Hannah Einbinder and a bunch of people were just detained at a

• 45:11Mae Martin?

  a protest, protesting Netanyahu and that kind of thing is, we need more of, I think. People not being afraid to speak out. Yeah, there's, okay, these are some organizations that, we should put these in the show notes too. If people can

• 45:25Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 45:26Mae Martin?

  donate to, or okay, the NAACP, uh, the Legal Defense Fund, Learning for Justice, Equal Justice Initiative, Planned Parenthood, obviously, ACLU, Color of Change, the National Immigrant Justice Center. Yeah, I just, oh, I mean, you guys grew up in the South. That is.

• 45:46Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, talk about some history there.

• 45:49Mae Martin?

  But it's crazy to think you guys probably were taught in schools more than kids today are being taught about black history and stuff. Because it's being so, um, censored and books being taken out of libraries.

• 46:02Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, I, I don't like, when you start hearing about things like that with just books alone being taken out of schools, they're like, what are we doing?

• 46:12Mae Martin?

  It's so alarming.

• 46:13Tig Notaro?

  And also, not to take away from, of course, the horrendous history of the South, but what people also don't realize is that it's everywhere.

• 46:24Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 46:25Tig Notaro?

  Everywhere. Whether it's like areas of upstate New York.

• 46:29Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 46:29Tig Notaro?

  Illinois. It's like, there's so many areas. And I, I, being from the South, people immediately, if I say I'm from Mississippi, they're like, oof. And I'm like, I totally know what that means. And it's, it's beyond race. It's, it's so many, so many parts of it. But it is astounding. Like I had a conversation with another comedian that he, he was, he was from outside of Chicago. And he was just, you know, going at me about, uh, the South and, and I said,

• 47:09Tig Notaro?

  where are you from? And he was like, outside of Illinois. He was like, I mean, my whole family is racist too.

• 47:15Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 47:16Tig Notaro?

  And not like, he was saying my family's racist or anything, but like.

• 47:20Mae Martin?

  He was like, I grew up around it.

• 47:21Tig Notaro?

  He was, yeah, he was just like, yeah. And I was like, so it's just interesting to me that the conversation was very focused on Mississippi, but like it is, it is there.

• 47:33Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 47:33Tig Notaro?

  And it is everywhere.

• 47:34Mae Martin?

  Oh, man, we're seeing how emboldened these people are now to have, yeah, uh, uh, these abhorrent views normalized. And then, yeah, everyone's coming out of the woodwork. They feel, they feel safe to unmask. To be like, yeah, I mean, it, it's absolutely wild. And, and with women's rights and reproductive rights. It's, yeah, I think it is going to take a long time to undo the damage that's been done, but I think it could happen. We just need some really inspiring Democrats.

• 48:06Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, you just can't give up and just be like, oh, we're, we're in the toilet.

• 48:10Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 48:11Fortune Feimster?

  Too bad.

• 48:12Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 48:12Fortune Feimster?

  It's just like, trying to figure out a way to

• 48:15Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 48:16Fortune Feimster?

  make change. And, yeah, not just sit back and be like, oh, well.

• 48:23Tig Notaro?

  It's, it's wild to imagine living your life

• 48:30Tig Notaro?

  not wanting or, or valuing other people's lives and not wanting them to live happily and freely.

• 48:39Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, with rights and with

• 48:41Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 48:42Fortune Feimster?

  equal opportunities. It's very weird that like, yeah, we, one group of people should have more than another. It's

• 48:49Tig Notaro?

  It makes absolutely no sense. I always think about that idea of how we all look the same on the inside. It's the same bones and organs and emotions and, um, it's, it's, and I know there's, there's so many deeply rooted ancient ideas about why this person or these people are more superior than these and the but it like, if you really think, like, what are, what?

• 49:25Mae Martin?

  It's also like so recent in a way. Like it's, yeah, it is crazy to think, I mean, and didn't. Rosa Parks die in like the 2000s like she like this is a heartbeat ago that you know we're still

• 49:38Tig Notaro?

  Oh, I always think about that when people I saw I remember years ago in the 90s watching some daytime talk show where the host said, I'm sorry, but slavery was hundreds and hundreds of years ago. And I was like, first of all, to say hundreds one time means 200 years ago. And at the time, it will and then to say hundreds again, that means over 400. This was in the 1860s.

• 50:08Mae Martin?

  Yeah, crazy.

• 50:09Tig Notaro?

  And this is, it was like barely over 100 years.

• 50:13Fortune Feimster?

  Not that long ago.

• 50:14Tig Notaro?

  No, no.

• 50:15Mae Martin?

  And in a way, it's and the ripple effect of that is still so acutely being felt and that a system built on subjugation.

• 50:22Fortune Feimster?

  And the civil rights movement was even shorter ago, you know?

• 50:25Mae Martin?

  Yeah, even I mean, with LGBT rights and stuff, it's it's easy to internalize the kind of like narrative that like woke people never shut up about it. And like it's and it's like, no, we really have to push through that embarrassment or the fear of saying something wrong because it's still it's so vital. It's people's lives. I feel like I'm sure most of our listeners and us are people that we're okay having uncomfortable conversations with people, calling out injustice when we see it. And but it's like, now I'm trying to look deeper at like, where do I spend my money? What do those companies support? Like, how? Yeah.

• 51:09Tig Notaro?

  What effect you're having.

• 51:10Mae Martin?

  Yeah, because, yeah, on a more like practical level. Yeah. I'm feeling emotional.

• 51:17Fortune Feimster?

  Well, you know, it's a dialogue that has to continue happening.

• 51:21Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 51:21Fortune Feimster?

  People have to continue to evolve as those conversations happen. And as we are more knowledgeable about things, like you have to do better.

• 51:30Mae Martin?

  Yeah, and not feel hopeless.

• 51:32Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 51:33Mae Martin?

  And try to take action in your community. And then you will feel better, I think, when you meet people and

• 51:39Tig Notaro?

  And sometimes it's impossible to not feel hopeless. And I think it's okay. But then you have to, what is the plan?

• 51:45Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 51:46Tig Notaro?

  What am I going to do differently?

• 51:47Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I definitely get burnout. Like, I think a lot of people are experiencing kind of, yeah, burnout from just the onslaught of bad news. And, and yeah, again, I think that's sort of intentional with the way we consume news now. But

• 52:02Tig Notaro?

  Right. As you know, I'm still off social media and I'm keeping up with the news. But I can't.

• 52:12Mae Martin?

  Are you feeling better, though?

• 52:15Tig Notaro?

  Um, oh, being off social media?

• 52:17Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 52:17Tig Notaro?

  Yes. And, you know, some people see it as like, like, it gets to such a part of being alive, being on social media, that it's like, people can see it as like, not being engaged or involved. But it but that's also like a sign of somebody that's too in social media.

• 52:40Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 52:40Tig Notaro?

  Because you can

• 52:41Mae Martin?

  Like, that's their whole life.

• 52:42Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's like, I can get knowledge other information other ways. And so, yeah, I'm kind of back to what I've done previously, which is I'll listen to like a five minute

• 52:58Mae Martin?

  Daily news.

• 52:59Tig Notaro?

  News podcast. And

• 53:01Mae Martin?

  Like NPR or whatever?

• 53:02Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 53:03Fortune Feimster?

  Actually hear like what's happening.

• 53:05Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, but also just staying engaged in conversation with people. And I used to when Thomas would tour with me years ago, I'd be like, what is this? And what's happening? And explain this to me. And Thomas would be like, well, that is, you know, I mean, I know I have plenty to learn and I'm not, I'm not removed at all. I was actually kind of impressed. I was on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, and I won the news.

• 53:30Mae Martin?

  Oh, right.

• 53:31Fortune Feimster?

  True.

• 53:31Mae Martin?

  That goes to show you.

• 53:33Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. So it's like, I am, I am aware, there's certain salacious stories and things that I can't deep dive on.

• 53:43Mae Martin?

  My brother is a historian and he I, well, that must be amazing because he, he understands like the whole context of civilization. Like, he, he has such a depth of knowledge on. And I go to him sometimes where I'm like, what's going on in Lebanon right now?

• 54:01Fortune Feimster?

  Well, yeah, that's the thing. I never want to speak on things in a public forum with that the platform they have on things I'm not knowledgeable about. I want to like be more educated in some of these things, you know, which that's on me to have to to learn about.

• 54:17Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 54:18Fortune Feimster?

  But I know I don't ever want to be just like, speaking and have no clue what I'm talking about, just because there is a platform.

• 54:26Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 54:26Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah. You have to, there, there's a responsibility that comes with that.

• 54:30Tig Notaro?

  There's a lot to know. There's a lot to know.

• 54:32Mae Martin?

  Yeah. But directing people to really educated people, this is all we can do and and donate and, yeah, and just know that we're all in it together, feeling overwhelmed and looking for connectivity and life affirming experiences.

• 54:48Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, going outside of your own bubbles.

• 54:49Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 54:50Fortune Feimster?

  You know, learning about other people, surrounding yourself with other people, not just living in your little world.

• 54:58Mae Martin?

  Yeah. It can feel hard because you're like, I actually can't, I can't relate to the people who hold these opinions, like, like, like people who are so obsessed with trans people in bathrooms. And it doesn't matter what stats you show them, what facts, they're just like living in an alternate reality where that's like a real threat. Meanwhile, they can't afford healthcare or food. And, and but that's what they're, anyway.

• 55:23Tig Notaro?

  Well, it's, yeah, they're distracting themselves from actual

• 55:28Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 55:29Tig Notaro?

  actual concerns.

• 55:32Fortune Feimster?

  It's fictional, like creating

• 55:34Mae Martin?

  Boogie monster.

• 55:34Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 55:35Fortune Feimster?

  Exactly.

• 55:36Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. Yeah. But when you were saying like, it was making you emotional, it is, it's, and I already said it, but why on earth would you not want people, their, their moment to be alive on this planet, to not feel love and safety and security?

• 55:58Mae Martin?

  Yeah, basic rights.

• 55:59Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. But like, really think about, like, that's somebody's child.

• 56:03Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 56:04Tig Notaro?

  That's somebody's mother, that's somebody's, that is a person on this planet that should be experiencing joy and love.

• 56:15Mae Martin?

  And safety.

• 56:15Tig Notaro?

  And safety, like any person.

• 56:19Mae Martin?

  I'm, I'm so emotional. I'm thinking about

• 56:23Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 56:24Mae Martin?

  Like the kids.

• 56:24Tig Notaro?

  Well, you have your, it's very directly connected to your life. It's our lives as well.

• 56:32Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 56:32Tig Notaro?

  And, and you have

• 56:34Mae Martin?

  I'm thinking mainly about those kids in the detention centers, just like five year olds, you know, and, and like you said, people have, it's not just that person, it's their whole family. And all of these thousands of parents who've been taken and they're or like these 50 people have died and like, all the people that love them.

• 56:53Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's, it's beyond despicable. And, and there's no way of getting around the effect on every single person. And if you think it isn't affecting you, then you're, it's, you're not thinking beyond your nose. Because if, you know, it reminds me of just even the old idea of just the importance of coming out.

• 57:23Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 57:23Tig Notaro?

  Because people, I don't know a gay person, I don't know a trans person. I don't know. It's like, they might not have come out yet.

• 57:30Mae Martin?

  Yeah, totally.

• 57:31Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, you do.

• 57:32Fortune Feimster?

  They didn't feel like they could.

• 57:33Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. And we're all connected to somebody in a detention center. We're all connected to everybody. And it's really, really think about not wanting safety, love, joy.

• 57:50Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 57:50Tig Notaro?

  Opportunity. This is everyone's chance to be alive.

• 57:56Mae Martin?

  I can get really woo woo about like, because it feels like there is such a disconnect or a lack of empathy and that I'm like, we need aliens to come. Like, we need like a radical shift in consciousness. But actually, that is a cop out as well. Because it's

• 58:13Tig Notaro?

  I was gonna say, May has figured out the answer.

• 58:15Fortune Feimster?

  Bring the aliens.

• 58:16Tig Notaro?

  Because Luenell was like, how do we do it?

• 58:19Fortune Feimster?

  Well, we gotta communicate with

• 58:21Tig Notaro?

  We definitely need that.

• 58:22Mae Martin?

  Yeah. But no, that is, I mean, I do want that. But it's also, that's a cop out. Because it's like, actually, they're small.

• 58:29Fortune Feimster?

  We gotta fix what's happening.

• 58:31Mae Martin?

  Yeah. Like, what if you decided for 15 minutes a day, I'm going to get online, do some research about my community? Maybe our listeners tag Magus and stuff, or find each other on the Facebook page of Handsome Get Together. Do some volunteering, do a bake sale, whatever.

• 58:47Tig Notaro?

  Mm-hmm.

• 58:47Mae Martin?

  Anything, even a hundred bucks can help a local candidate who's up against a massive person who's funded by oligarchs.

• 58:56Tig Notaro?

  Mm-hmm. Well, let's hear what

• 58:58Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 59:00Tig Notaro?

  And stay in conversation.

• 59:01Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 59:02Tig Notaro?

  Stay in conversation.

• 59:04Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 59:05Tig Notaro?

  What if she says aliens?

• 59:06Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 59:08Speaker 04

  So, in answer to my question, what can we do to combat this bigotry and racism and discrimination? I think us as comics, Fortune and myself and our friends, I think our duty is to try to incorporate a little knowledge in with our humor. I think through humor, we can help to bridge the gap and teach at the same time. I think that when you look around a comedy showroom, it's everybody. If the world could be more like a comedy showroom, we'd be better off, right? That would be a start. That's what it's supposed to look like.

• 59:53Speaker 04

  A showroom in a comedy club, and of course, on a cruise ship.

• 59:58Speaker 04

  That's my answer.

• 59:59Fortune Feimster?

  I love Luenell. She's so funny.

• 1:00:01Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:02Fortune Feimster?

  So funny.

• 1:00:03Tig Notaro?

  She is.

• 1:00:04Mae Martin?

  Yeah. Yeah, I mean, definitely, people lower their defenses when they're laughing.

• 1:00:08Fortune Feimster?

  We know Luenell was in the Borat movie where the scene of the crazy, like, the southern people and

• 1:00:16Mae Martin?

  I don't remember. Oh, yeah.

• 1:00:17Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:18Mae Martin?

  Playing a

• 1:00:19Fortune Feimster?

  A play

• 1:00:20Mae Martin?

  Like a sex worker?

• 1:00:21Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:21Mae Martin?

  Yes.

• 1:00:22Fortune Feimster?

  It just definitely, you know, exposes people's

• 1:00:25Mae Martin?

  Expose people, yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:27Fortune Feimster?

  What their conversations were, were like wild.

• 1:00:30Tig Notaro?

  Well, you know, it reminds me, I think about this every single time I get on an airplane. I think if my greatest enemy in the world sat next to me.

• 1:00:43Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:44Tig Notaro?

  Or the biggest homophobe.

• 1:00:47Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:47Tig Notaro?

  Or big, whatever, is sitting next to me. And we actually, I always think of it on a plane.

• 1:00:54Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:54Tig Notaro?

  I always think, what if we had to fly five hours next to each other and we just talked and we had an enjoyable conversation and then

• 1:01:03Fortune Feimster?

  Then found out.

• 1:01:04Tig Notaro?

  And then found out.

• 1:01:05Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:05Tig Notaro?

  Not that there'd be a big reveal for me, but

• 1:01:08Mae Martin?

  Then we'd peel your mustache off.

• 1:01:10Tig Notaro?

  I'm female!

• 1:01:11Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:12Tig Notaro?

  And I think I've talked about it on this, but it, on this show, but I truly think about it every time I fly. If you're connecting with somebody in the seat right next to you, and you're enjoying each other, and then you're like, these are my thoughts and feelings. I don't agree. I don't accept you.

• 1:01:29Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:30Tig Notaro?

  And then I picture, but I enjoy talking to you. And then I picture everyone getting off the plane. And then what if the person next to me that did not agree with me, or accept, or like, voted against, or maybe was even violent against somebody? I feel like if somebody attacked me getting off the plane, the person sitting next to me probably would try and save me.

• 1:01:56Mae Martin?

  Yeah, that's interesting.

• 1:01:57Tig Notaro?

  You know what I mean?

• 1:01:58Mae Martin?

  Yeah, that's interesting.

• 1:01:59Tig Notaro?

  Like, it's such a weird thought, but that intimacy and connection and just being physically close and talking.

• 1:02:08Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:09Tig Notaro?

  Or you're trapped in an elevator together.

• 1:02:11Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:12Tig Notaro?

  And you get out, somebody attacks you, that person would likely protect you.

• 1:02:17Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:18Tig Notaro?

  And I don't know where I'm getting at with that, but it's just, I guess it's just the connection and the conversation and

• 1:02:25Fortune Feimster?

  Taking the time to actually get to know somebody.

• 1:02:28Mae Martin?

  Also, I love when people come to see me

• 1:02:30Tig Notaro?

  Because they think it's human nature.

• 1:02:31Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:32Tig Notaro?

  Is, you don't really

• 1:02:35Fortune Feimster?

  Putting actual empathy to people.

• 1:02:38Mae Martin?

  Even these, like, extremely right-wing people, they're looking for community and they're finding it with each other, like, and that's part of what's fueling it, is they're like, they're, yeah. But I always like when people come to see me, and I'm sure you guys have this, if, like, parents say to me, it was important for their kid who just came out to see someone like them who's

• 1:02:58Fortune Feimster?

  Representation.

• 1:02:59Mae Martin?

  Yeah, and who's most of the time, like, but who's, like, confident and living a life that is fulfilling to them. That's really important, I think.

• 1:03:09Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. That, that means a lot to me as well. Like, when people say that, like, about my family or whatever.

• 1:03:16Mae Martin?

  Yeah. To see that that is a possibility.

• 1:03:19Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:19Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:20Tig Notaro?

  To have an imperfect family.

• 1:03:22Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:24Tig Notaro?

  As gay people.

• 1:03:25Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:25Tig Notaro?

  That, that happens too.

• 1:03:27Fortune Feimster?

  Something, you know, it's something people aspire to, or like, they, yeah, I've talked about it before, like, I came out so late because I didn't see myself in anyone. Like, I had, I couldn't pinpoint what it was that was different about me.

• 1:03:43Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:44Fortune Feimster?

  And then once I saw it in front of me, it was like, holy cow.

• 1:03:47Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:48Fortune Feimster?

  That's the missing puzzle piece, you know?

• 1:03:50Tig Notaro?

  It's like the Fun Home musical. The song Ring of Keys.

• 1:03:55Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:55Tig Notaro?

  The kid sees this butchy lesbian walk into a diner, and then

• 1:04:02Mae Martin?

  With a ring of keys?

• 1:04:03Tig Notaro?

  With, no, with

• 1:04:04Mae Martin?

  Oh, like a carabiner?

• 1:04:05Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. Like, with keys on their, on their belt, and it's just so touching and beautiful that this child just stops and is like, I love the line of, I know you.

• 1:04:18Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:19Tig Notaro?

  I know you.

• 1:04:20Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:21Tig Notaro?

  This, like, ten-year-old little girl's first moment of like, this is the, you're the most beautiful, and then says, no, handsome.

• 1:04:29Mae Martin?

  Oh, I love it.

• 1:04:31Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, and it's, you see that moment happen.

• 1:04:34Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:35Tig Notaro?

  And it's so touching.

• 1:04:37Fortune Feimster?

  Look at that, keeping it handsome.

• 1:04:39Tig Notaro?

  Keeping it handsome.

• 1:04:40Fortune Feimster?

  Wow.

• 1:04:40Mae Martin?

  What an app.

• 1:04:42Tig Notaro?

  Well, we

• 1:04:43Mae Martin?

  I loved this one.

• 1:04:44Tig Notaro?

  Figured it out.

• 1:04:45Mae Martin?

  So, we landed on aliens.

• 1:04:47Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, we did.

• 1:04:48Fortune Feimster?

  We landed on aliens.

• 1:04:49Tig Notaro?

  And comedy.

• 1:04:51Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:52Tig Notaro?

  So But, yeah, stay in communication and

• 1:04:55Mae Martin?

  Yep.

• 1:04:56Tig Notaro?

  Be curious about people and things, and and you do things wrong, well

• 1:05:02Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:02Tig Notaro?

  Reevaluate.

• 1:05:04Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:04Tig Notaro?

  Learn.

• 1:05:05Fortune Feimster?

  I'm coming up on the end of my tour, of the Taking Care of Biscuits Tour, and up next, I will have Santa Barbara, San Luis Obispo, Athens, Georgia, Los Angeles, Palm Springs, Denver, and then Nashville, Tennessee, and then that is the end

• 1:05:25Tig Notaro?

  My goodness.

• 1:05:25Fortune Feimster?

  Of my touring

• 1:05:26Mae Martin?

  I have, well, first of all, I want people to come to our Holly Bob's show.

• 1:05:29Fortune Feimster?

  Yes, that's December 12th.

• 1:05:31Mae Martin?

  Yes.

• 1:05:31Fortune Feimster?

  And that link will be available through the holidays, so I believe until about January 1st.

• 1:05:38Tig Notaro?

  And I do want to let everyone know, if you tune in, my surgery had to get moved for my eyes, and I will be recovering, so people can see that.

• 1:05:47Mae Martin?

  Okay. Excited about that.

• 1:05:49Tig Notaro?

  On the show.

• 1:05:51Mae Martin?

  The thing I really want to plug is November 12th, I'm at Largo, and I'm doing a music show, so I'm gonna have musical guests, and then I'm gonna play some

• 1:05:59Tig Notaro?

  With Alanis Morissette?

• 1:06:00Mae Martin?

  Oh, God, I wish. I mean, should I ask her?

• 1:06:04Tig Notaro?

  I mean, no.

• 1:06:08Mae Martin?

  I'm gonna play some new songs, so And I've been, I've been rehearsing, I've been working on new music, so please come.

• 1:06:13Tig Notaro?

  Great.

• 1:06:14Mae Martin?

  That'd be great.

• 1:06:15Tig Notaro?

  I will be in Olympia, Washington, Fresno, Napa, Wilmington, Delaware, Tarrytown, New York, New London, Connecticut, Colorado Springs, Steamboat Springs, Basalt. Some of those are already sold out, but go to Tignotaro.com, and I'm also always at Largo or Dynasty Typewriter here in Los Angeles, working things out or having a circus of a show. And share your favorite episodes with your friends. This community is radical.

• 1:06:47Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:47Tig Notaro?

  And people will enjoy being a part of it. We can promise that, or you can get your money back. Isn't that right?

• 1:06:55Fortune Feimster?

  You can listen to it for free, is the best part.

• 1:06:57Mae Martin?

  Yeah, listen for free.

• 1:06:58Tig Notaro?

  Do that. And until next time.

• 1:07:01Fortune Feimster?

  Keep it handsome.

• 1:07:03Mae Martin?

  Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Willett. Email us at [email protected], and please follow us on social media, at HandsomePod.

• 1:07:18Fortune Feimster?

  What a podcast! What a podcast!

• 1:07:24Speaker 00

  That was a HeadGum Podcast.

• 1:07:27Mae Martin?

  Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking whether I have enough tickets before getting in line for a ride at the fair? Tilt a whoopsie. I waited in line for so long, only to be turned away at the gate. Maybe I'll have more luck whacking a mole.

• 1:07:41Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, checking first is handsome, so check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.