#111 - Ian Lara

Ian Lara returns to the pod to discuss what surprised him about traveling with Stav, the fallacy of "you can't say anything anymore," whether Spongebob can be considered the Seinfeld of cartoons, the ridiculous convos podcasts have wrought upon us, and much more. Ian and Stav help callers including a newly single man who feels he is being sabotaged by women he's dating who intentionally leave stuff at his place, and a woman who suspects that her husband is cheating on her. Visit https://mintmobile.com/stavvy to get a 3-month premium wireless plan for just $15/month. See Ian Lara live and follow him on social media: https://punchup.live/ianlara https://www.ianlaralive.com/ https://x.com/IANLARALIVE https://www.instagram.com/IANLARALIVE https://www.facebook.com/ianlaralive 🎟️ See Stavvy live on the Dreamboat Tour 🛥️💕!!! https://stavvy.biz/ for tickets 🎥 Rent or buy LET'S START A CULT at https://stavvy.biz/movie ‼️ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld ☎️ Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Time for a quick break to talk about McDonald's. It's the tangiest time of the year. For a limited time, head to McDonald's and get a McRib sandwich. Make it a meal by adding a medium fries and a soft drink like an ice cold Diet Dr. Pepper. So grab a McRib sandwich and embrace the tang. Save time by ordering ahead on the app. At participating McDonald's for a limited time. Dr. Pepper is a registered trademark of Dr. Pepper, 7-Up Inc.

• 0:24Speaker 01

  Most meeting note takers get the easy words right and the important ones wrong. The client's name, the acronym. Whisper Flow Note Taker is built to get the hard words right. It takes notes on any meeting platform. Zoom, Google Meet, Teams, even WhatsApp calls. Keeps every meeting searchable and connects to Claude or ChatGPT. So you can ask, what did we agree to last Tuesday? Free to try on Mac and Windows at whisperflow.ai. That's W I S P R flow.ai.

• 0:56Stavros Halkias?

  Hoppa, welcome everybody to Stav's World 904-800-Stav. Call in, we'll solve all your problems. We have returning after a long absence, our pal Ian Lara. Ian, thanks for coming, buddy.

• 1:10Speaker 03

  Thank you for having me, bro. I feel like I was one of the first episodes in the studio. And then I watched the clip, didn't you have Blake here?

• 1:18Stavros Halkias?

  I had Blake Griffin in that very seat. I'm like, what? In that very seat Blake Griffin sat.

• 1:23Speaker 03

  Dude, when I saw that, I was like, he couldn't have. They must have built a makeshift studio at 30 Rock. There's no way Stav invited him.

• 1:31Stavros Halkias?

  No, dude, we've thought about this, we've thought about switching studios. There's something so nice about making famous people come to some shitty apartment building in Queens. And be like, this is the podcast?

• 1:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, they bring security.

• 1:48Speaker 03

  I thought that was insane, but I'm happy, I'm happy to be back, man.

• 1:51Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, dude, no, we, we honestly have thought about switching it up, you know? The Are You Garbage Boys, those motherfuckers pay probably, who they got, they got prime Manhattan real estate.

• 2:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, they, they did like two episodes and was like, okay, we gotta move to, we gotta move to Hollywood.

• 2:08Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, who the fuck did? Those assholes think they are.

• 2:11Speaker 03

  They're doing it the good way. I was like, Jesus. No, but they're they're great. Yeah, everyone talks about how nice their studio is.

• 2:18Stavros Halkias?

  Thank you. This works. We'll take that. That's a that's a route. Like we were earlier, we were just going over the level of sound engineering we have is. There's a noisy room next door and Eldis sometimes remembers to shut the door and that's all. He he always worries about that. I've never seen him tweak a microphone. I've never seen him do any research on, you know.

• 2:41Speaker 04

  The best engineering is, there's a lot going on, but the stuff you don't notice.

• 2:47Speaker 03

  He was like touching the camera. I'm not sure he was touching it. He was like, we were talking and I was seeing him like adjusting, but I wasn't sure he was moving the cameras at all.

• 2:55Stavros Halkias?

  Unfortunately, that he does do that every time and that's actually not a sign of being good at his job. Because these cameras have not moved one centimeter since the day we set them up. Every time a guest is here, sometimes it takes out this, we're sitting here ready to go. Eldis, the cameras that have been here, he's adjusting them for 15 minutes and we have to do that awkward. We thought we were about to pod, but now we're going back to regular friend conversation and he's just like. Tweaking what on earth? I have no fucking idea. We gotta get you autofocus, man. We gotta get you cameras with autofocus. I've learned to just give up. You're never gonna figure it out. We just need better cameras.

• 3:34Speaker 04

  A good engineer is is like God. He's everywhere and nowhere at once in his creation. You don't see him or hear him.

• 3:41Stavros Halkias?

  Constantly. We see you constantly and we feel it constantly and how fucking annoying it is. What are you talking about?

• 3:52Speaker 03

  Man, it's I think it's that big, big dick energy.

• 3:55Stavros Halkias?

  You tried to make him big dick.

• 3:57Speaker 04

  Why, why do we wait so long to get Ian back on?

• 4:01Stavros Halkias?

  I don't like, Ian was honestly the first speed bump in setting up the eldest persona. Because early on, you were probably like, episode, what, four or some shit like that?

• 4:11Speaker 04

  Patriot number four, three or four or something like that.

• 4:13Stavros Halkias?

  I thought he was on a free app.

• 4:15Speaker 04

  Oh, maybe he was.

• 4:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, I was, I was.

• 4:16Speaker 04

  Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 4:18Speaker 03

  Um, no, but that was when I was, I was, uh, when we went on the road, I was opening for you and I, I tried to-

• 4:23Stavros Halkias?

  That's right, that's right.

• 4:25Speaker 03

  I tried to brand him.

• 4:26Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, he tried to brand him Big Dick Eldis.

• 4:30Speaker 03

  You wouldn't let it ride.

• 4:31Stavros Halkias?

  There was no way we're letting-

• 4:32Speaker 04

  I've been trying real hard to make that one stick.

• 4:34Stavros Halkias?

  There's no way we're letting Big Dick Eldis stick, no chance. Who knows, though? Now he's, he's developed a little cult of personality. So now the, the, the true eldest heads might get behind Big Dick Eldis.

• 4:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 4:46Speaker 04

  Sound off in the comments.

• 4:48Speaker 03

  Well, all the eldest heads, I was the first dude-

• 4:51Stavros Halkias?

  He was, you were.

• 4:52Speaker 03

  To lift him up. He didn't even talk back then.

• 4:55Stavros Halkias?

  No, no, no. He's really come out of his shell. He, he really came out of his shell at thirty-five.

• 5:03Speaker 03

  I think he like got married after that. He just like changed his life after a weekend in Albany.

• 5:08Stavros Halkias?

  That's true. That's true. Albany, that was fucking awesome.

• 5:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 5:12Stavros Halkias?

  Uh, that was one of my favorite moments. Did we talk about this on the last app? Maybe, who knows? It was years ago. Um, it was literally over a year ago, but my favorite moment, which was, we, really made me and Eldis think about how we consume media, is when we kept, we were like, dude, we gotta watch, we, you know, we like to watch shitty stand-up specials on the road.

• 5:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 5:32Stavros Halkias?

  And when we pitched a specific special to you and you were like, so you guys just watch shit that sucks? And you were, you were so confused that we were like pumped to see something that was horri- And we were pitching it to you like, dude, it's awesome. This guy's bombing the whole time. And you're like, what?

• 5:51Speaker 03

  No, you guys were looking forward to it, like, like it was the season finale of Penguin. You guys were like, we're gonna go back to the house, we're gonna throw on a special, man.

• 6:00Stavros Halkias?

  We had watched it.

• 6:01Speaker 03

  You're gonna love it, it fucking sucks.

• 6:02Stavros Halkias?

  We already watched it, by the way. We had seen it like two days prior and we were excited to show it to you because he's, because it sucked.

• 6:10Speaker 03

  You're like, you're gonna love it, man. It fucking sticks. The act outs are bad, the premises are bad, everything about it is the worst.

• 6:19Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, we really have developed so much of what we like to watch is shit that's horrible.

• 6:23Speaker 03

  The funny shit is, I don't wanna say who it was.

• 6:25Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, we can't say it.

• 6:27Speaker 03

  The next day, like, I was working with you that weekend, and then when I got back to New York on Sunday, I was invited to his premiere of his new special. So I went to the premiere, and the whole time I'm thinking about, man, when Starro watches this, I mean.

• 6:42Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, and I watched it.

• 6:43Speaker 03

  He thought the other one was bad.

• 6:45Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, and I watched it, brother. I literally, I have like.

• 6:49Speaker 04

  Didn't we just watch that?

• 6:51Speaker 03

  We watched. He's had two since then.

• 6:54Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, we've kept up, no, we watched the second one recently, the one, the one after that one.

• 7:00Speaker 03

  Oh, my god, bro.

• 7:01Stavros Halkias?

  That one's really bad, too.

• 7:05Stavros Halkias?

  I'd love to.

• 7:05Speaker 03

  That one is like, I'll, I'll admit, that one is like, level up bad.

• 7:10Stavros Halkias?

  It's awesome.

• 7:10Speaker 03

  It's like, cuz it's like, it tries to be like meta.

• 7:13Stavros Halkias?

  Exactly.

• 7:14Speaker 03

  It's like, it's not just bad comedy, it's like.

• 7:16Stavros Halkias?

  No, it's fascinating, and unfortunately, we really, it's just a bad look to just openly trash someone, even if we think their stuff stinks, but maybe we need to create another tier on the Patreon, Eldis, for like, our true thoughts, the true thoughts tier.

• 7:32Speaker 03

  Dude, I was, I went to the premiere, and I was watching people pretend that they were like, like.

• 7:40Stavros Halkias?

  That they were, that they were like, moved.

• 7:41Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 7:42Stavros Halkias?

  Cuz that's another element.

• 7:42Speaker 03

  This is like, deep.

• 7:43Stavros Halkias?

  That's my favorite thing about stand-up comedy now, is people pretend we're deep. It's like, that's so stupid. You need to be funny. The entire job is be funny. There is not any other thing about it. It's the simplest art form on earth. It's make people laugh by any, any way you need to do it, figure it out, but don't, you don't gotta make them think, it doesn't have to be fucking poignant, and some people can do it, but it's like.

• 8:11Speaker 03

  Funny is out, bro. It's uh, the art form is a b-.

• 8:14Stavros Halkias?

  It's coming back, brother. It's coming back.

• 8:15Speaker 03

  It's no longer funny.

• 8:17Stavros Halkias?

  It's coming back, brother.

• 8:18Speaker 03

  You're like old school.

• 8:19Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah. Call me crazy. I think we, I think stand up should have jokes and be funny. And not pander.

• 8:26Speaker 03

  You, you ought to be fu- I mean, that's, the funny thing about that is, I like, cause I feel like some comics, they just stay away from it. Like, they don't, they don't like, they just like, I just do this shit that I do and whatever happens. And then some, some of them try to fight the culture wars of like-

• 8:39Stavros Halkias?

  Well, that's the fucking most bitch ass thing you could possibly do.

• 8:43Speaker 03

  I thought so, too.

• 8:44Stavros Halkias?

  And it's, what's so funny is all the, like, there's a, now, cause it's like, obviously, everyone would make fun of alt comics for pandering, but it is literally worse on the right.

• 8:54Speaker 03

  It's now worse.

• 8:55Stavros Halkias?

  It's so worse. And you know what? Alt comics weren't funny, and they were like, and, and like, you know, half of them were hacks, but some of them were doing imaginative things. And some of them are doing interesting things for the art form. No one is doing anything good on the right. No, there's not one actually funny, and everyone who goes that way gets less funny. And people are gonna be fu- some of the worst listeners in our fanbase are gonna be mad at me for saying that. Suck my dick and unsubscribe. But there is not one, there is not one, there's not one like innovator who's talking about not being able to say slurs. There's not one person who, with, uh, you know, it's just, ma- I don't even think who I would come up, now it's so fucking hack.

• 9:38Stavros Halkias?

  And they're the same, they're the same as the left. It sucks.

• 9:41Speaker 03

  I agree. I think that's the funny part. It's the same. Like, it's the same on the other side. But they don't see it. Like, they saw it objectively when it was one side. We all saw it, cause obviously, especially in New York, there was like a phase where the comics would go on stage and they would just like, kinda clap there. They'll say things like, you know, wo- women shouldn't be sexually assaulted.

• 9:58Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, right.

• 9:59Speaker 03

  And everyone was like, yeah.

• 10:00Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, yeah, we agree.

• 10:03Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's that's fair.

• 10:04Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, it's like, oh, not funny to you?

• 10:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:07Stavros Halkias?

  White fucking oppressors there from Connecticut.

• 10:10Speaker 03

  Right, right.

• 10:11Stavros Halkias?

  It's a girl that was a Republican until three years ago and they're calling straight white men the devil? And it's like, alright.

• 10:17Speaker 03

  So I get it, we called it out when it was that and it was fine. But then when the other, like now, the same people that was calling it out is doing it on the other side, but they don't see it.

• 10:25Stavros Halkias?

  And now, and it's awesome, cause they're do- they're being so- they're literally being gayer than some of the gay alt comics. Like the guys that put on fu- Tyler Fisher will put on lipstick and wear, and they'll dress like women. And it's like, that's gay! You are being gay, dude! And it's like, and I like gay comics, but you're making fun of them? By pu- you buy lip- you go to the store to buy lipstick? They've probably bought li- there's, there's alt, there's like right comics that have purchased makeup multiple times.

• 10:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:58Stavros Halkias?

  For their act. They know the shade of lipstick that works best. They have opinions on the shade of lipstick that works for their lips and they're making fun of trans people. It's like, what are we fucking doing here, man?

• 11:10Speaker 03

  It's pretty wild.

• 11:11Stavros Halkias?

  What the fuck are we doing here?

• 11:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, i- i- it's pretty wild. What I think is pretty wild is that like, some, some of them are making it seem like they're on this like crusade. To like, break through, but they're getting like really rich off of it, which is like a weird thing. It's a weird thing of being like, I'm fighting for the thing, but if like, if you won the fight that you're fighting for, then you would just be pointless. Because your whole thing is fighting that thing. So if, if tha- that thing stopped, then what would you do? Then you would just have to be a comic.

• 11:38Stavros Halkias?

  They have nothing to say. They have nothing to say, right. Their acts stink. That's the thing, it's like their acts are mediocre at best, mediocre at best. And you don't grow if you fucking, and here's the other thing. Having, and we'll stop talking about comedy soon, we just, you know, because i- I don't want to be one of those podcasts that overdoes it, but like, um, yeah, you're just, you exist in, against something and it's like, what do you have to say? Like all the people who talk about free speech, and I think you should be able to, I'm a huge free speech guy, obviously.

• 12:07Speaker 03

  Right.

• 12:08Stavros Halkias?

  But you need something to say.

• 12:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 12:10Stavros Halkias?

  And you should be able to say the most offensive thing. Things for a reason, not just because you're bombing and if you say retard, it'll get a laugh. That's not a joke. That's literally not a joke.

• 12:22Speaker 03

  I couldn't agree with you more. I have a tough time. I think, I think sometimes we let the conversation of free speech, it gets like diluted. Cause I think if you sat down, we're just like, what do you mean free speech? What do you mean by that?

• 12:33Stavros Halkias?

  And what do you wanna say?

• 12:34Speaker 03

  Right, right, like.

• 12:35Stavros Halkias?

  What's the thing you can't say?

• 12:37Speaker 03

  Right, right, cause you're saying it. Cause we're on your podcast.

• 12:47Speaker 03

  This is bigger than all media.

• 12:49Stavros Halkias?

  Without question.

• 12:50Speaker 03

  And you're saying it.

• 12:51Stavros Halkias?

  What is the thing you can't say? I'd love to know.

• 12:54Speaker 03

  Like, not only that, but if you stepped away from it, it's like, you're also selling out theaters.

• 12:58Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I know dude. I know, it's fucking crazy.

• 13:02Speaker 03

  What's the thing? What's the, what's the persecution that you're?

• 13:05Stavros Halkias?

  It's crazy and it's like, those are the same people that call people victims. It's like you have got a victim mentality and become rich off it and it's just fucking crazy, dude.

• 13:15Speaker 03

  Yeah, I always just wonder like, do, like, cause if you tell me that they understand and they're like, oh yeah, this is just like, whatever, I'm doing this to make money. I'm like, alright, cool, like.

• 13:22Stavros Halkias?

  I would respect that more. I would respect that more.

• 13:24Speaker 03

  I'm from New York, it's like, alright, cool.

• 13:25Stavros Halkias?

  I would, I would literally like a, like, I mean, I don't think Tucker Carlson's a good guy and I think it is weird how people suck him off sometimes, but it's like, he doesn't have morals or stand, he just does whatever like, the same like Glenn Beck or whatever the, like those like right wing guys, they know they're playing. They might, their politics are probably more conservative than the average person, but they don't believe all the fucking culture war shit they're saying. You know what I mean? They're just like, oh yeah, pretending I, I'm scared of trans children makes me a billionaire. So I'm gonna do it. Pretending that's a threat, like those people don't actually, aren't actually scared of their son getting his dick chopped off in preschool, but they pretend they are, cause they know

• 14:08Stavros Halkias?

  old people will be like, oh, I should fucking buy his book.

• 14:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 14:13Stavros Halkias?

  Saving my grandchild from turning gay.

• 14:17Speaker 03

  But those people, I'm like, alright, whatever, that's your job, but comedians, I'm like, what's this notion of like, you just wanna do comedy in a, in a vacuum where there's no, no repercussions, where it's just like, say whatever you want and we can't even, cause it's like, you say free speech, it's like, yeah, we don't want you arrested. We just want to not laugh.

• 14:34Stavros Halkias?

  Just to say you're bombing in a fucking hack.

• 14:37Speaker 03

  Right, right.

• 14:37Stavros Halkias?

  You are that.

• 14:38Speaker 03

  Like you want freedom from that?

• 14:42Speaker 03

  I can't say you're bombing in a fucking hat.

• 14:46Stavros Halkias?

  You wanna be respected?

• 14:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 14:48Stavros Halkias?

  But you suck at comedy. Also, there's not that many good, but that is why this happened, just cuz like so few people can actually be good at comedy. And so it pisses them off, they think they should be famous. And this is an E, and again, both ways, but I will say, in the last decade, it's become clear, it's a lot more profitable and easy to be the fucking, the right wing comic now.

• 15:11Speaker 03

  Oh, for sure.

• 15:12Stavros Halkias?

  Because like the left wing comics, they still have to go through this stupid, like, they kinda got fucked, that the people that were sucking them off were like, the dying TV.

• 15:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 15:22Stavros Halkias?

  And movie industry, it's like.

• 15:22Speaker 03

  Tell me about it.

• 15:23Stavros Halkias?

  You know what?

• 15:25Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, HBO, check out, uh, Ian's special on HBO Latino.

• 15:29Speaker 03

  I just did my fourth Tonight Show last week.

• 15:35Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, dude, if you had, yeah, you fucked up, man.

• 15:39Speaker 03

  It does, I mean, he, like, forget, forget, like, as white guy, cuz like, the white field, the white guy right wing field is kinda, it's a little crowded.

• 15:47Stavros Halkias?

  It's a little crowded.

• 15:48Speaker 03

  Even though you can, you can rise pretty quickly.

• 15:50Stavros Halkias?

  You can still.

• 15:50Speaker 03

  But somebody like me on that side?

• 15:52Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, my god.

• 15:54Speaker 03

  That would be a shooting star.

• 15:55Stavros Halkias?

  Talking about how, actually, we destabilize, the black family destabilizes itself.

• 16:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:01Stavros Halkias?

  If you said that, oh, man. For real, dude, that would be some of the worst fans of all time, but hey, you would have.

• 16:09Speaker 03

  And you know what kinda sucks, though? Like, cuz sometimes, obviously, you tour and you do places where all there is is like, right wing people, and they come to my shows, and I'm like, they're good comedy fans sometimes.

• 16:20Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, they're good fans.

• 16:21Speaker 03

  As long as you don't talk about the stuff they don't like.

• 16:22Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly.

• 16:23Speaker 03

  But other than that, they're, they're good comedy fans.

• 16:26Stavros Halkias?

  They'll take some observational humor.

• 16:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, they're good, just don't mention anything they disagree with.

• 16:31Stavros Halkias?

  But it is fun to do, I will say, one thing, like, like, Austin definitely has become like, uh, like, more of a right-leaning comedy audience, for sure. I like that that exists, though, because it's fun to be able to go, like, you, I tell a joke about how Elon Musk is a piece of shit here.

• 16:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:49Stavros Halkias?

  No problem.

• 16:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:50Stavros Halkias?

  I tell it there, those motherf- there's half the audience just crossing their arms and being like, hmm.

• 16:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:55Stavros Halkias?

  Talk about gay guys, you know what I mean, like?

• 16:57Speaker 03

  You're like, I'm getting there.

• 16:58Stavros Halkias?

  And I'm like, yeah, don't get, don't worry, that's coming.

• 17:02Speaker 03

  It's my clothes, man.

• 17:03Stavros Halkias?

  We're getting to that part.

• 17:07Stavros Halkias?

  This episode is brought to you by Visible. The smartest upgrade this season isn't a new phone, it's a better wireless plan. Switch to Visible, the ultimate wireless hack. You get unlimited 5G data and unlimited hotspot powered by Verizon. We have Visible here at Stavi Baby Enterprises. We love it. We just got a new assistant. She loves it. She's taking all our sushi orders. They're going through the Visible network brought to you by Verizon. It's fast, it's reliable, it's so sick. They sponsor the Stavies World hotline, as you know, and make it possible for us to help all our callers out. Oh my God, they're the best. Switch today at visible.com. The Visible plan starts at $25 a month, or get the premium

• 17:47Stavros Halkias?

  Visible Plus Pro Plan and save $10 on your first month with promo code STAV. Terms apply. Ah, November, what a month. The whole, everything you've been doing all year comes to roost. You're coming right into the holidays, it's getting cold. Why not have a little questionable, little treat in between lunch and dinner? Why not overstuffed the calendar with fun, with family obligations, holiday parties, so much chaos going on? That's where AG1 earns its spot. Not when life is easy and you've got time for a whole routine. Right now, when everything is full and something has to give. One scoop covers what a full stack of separate

• 18:27Stavros Halkias?

  supplements would. 75 plus ingredients, vitamins, minerals, adaptogens, pre and probiotics, superfoods. No cabinet full of bottles, no figuring out what to take and when. And with their new AG1 Pro, you get the same daily drink now with a performance and recovery layer built in. I'm a first thing in the morning guy. I start my day with that beautiful AG1, puts a little pep in my step. You know I'm back on my health journey and it's going beautiful. For a limited time, visit drinkag1.com/stavi and get a free immune support bundle, including omega-3 fish oil and vitamin D3 plus K2 with your first subscription of AG1

• 19:07Stavros Halkias?

  Next Gen or AG1 Pro. That's drinkag1.com/stavi. It was just an interesting observation because we love watching. Watching comedy that sucks dick for fun. That's one of my, that's what, that's like, whenever we're like kinda scrolling endlessly, if it's like me, eldest and a couple of our friends are like, someone will inevitably say, let's throw on something horrible, or they've had something pinned. And I guess that also, I wonder if that legitimately is a real cultural difference between black guys and white guys. I, I hate watching things, ironic watching. I don't really get, I never got the sense growing up that my black friends like doing that.

• 19:49Stavros Halkias?

  It's kind of like a, it grows out of sort of like, uh, being a hater and a troll in the depths of your fucking, of the internet. Like, it's kind, it's grown out of that. Um, and I just feel like, I just, I really, I'm, and I'm not, you know, I'm, I could definitely think of a couple of my black, black friends that love doing that with me, but it's like, for the most part, there is something like, you being like, you just watch shit that sucks, was so sobering to think of it that way, where it's like, yeah, I guess I do. I guess, I guess I seek out things that are bad.

• 20:22Speaker 03

  But personally, I think this is, this is, this is like a quaint charm to that, to the fact that, that you could just watch it and just let it exist in your own world. You don't have to go on Reddit and make like a whole thing about it.

• 20:33Stavros Halkias?

  That's a good point.

• 20:33Speaker 03

  You just watch it, you're like, this fucking sucks, and then you just get up and, and go make dinner.

• 20:39Stavros Halkias?

  Well, I'll say this, I don't, I watch things that suck and I don't have the negative Reddit reaction. I get pure glee from it.

• 20:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:47Stavros Halkias?

  I'm like, that, not only am I not mad.

• 20:49Speaker 03

  I don't have that neither, I'm like that too. Where like, I'll watch it and like, I don't get angry. Like, some people get angry.

• 20:55Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right, right, right.

• 20:56Speaker 03

  You ever, I mean, you probably don't engage in comments, but some comments, you just wanna be like, bro, why are you angry? Like, you could've just scrolled past. It's like, so much other stuff out there, and some people are like, some people literally are like, why do I keep getting this bullshit on my feed? Like, don't comment that. And then I'll reply, cuz you're commenting on it.

• 21:11Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, exactly. You just juiced the algorithm, bro.

• 21:15Speaker 03

  This is what you enjoy.

• 21:16Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah. That's so, yeah, it's fucking funny. But yeah, there was no, there, I'm trying to think, what do you think the first thing we watched ironically was? That's a very int- cuz definitely some of the things I liked growing up in hindsight, people said were bad, but I just think that's my like, I like shitty piece like comedy movies people thought were shitty like I loved Night at the Roxbury.

• 21:38Speaker 03

  I loved it too. People think that's shitty?

• 21:40Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, like I love.

• 21:41Speaker 03

  I thought that was a classic.

• 21:42Stavros Halkias?

  It is. It it holds up. I watched it recently. It holds up.

• 21:45Speaker 03

  It's a classic in my opinion.

• 21:46Stavros Halkias?

  But that's not exactly what I'm talking about. I'm trying to think, do you, can you come up with anything we watched and made fun of?

• 21:50Speaker 04

  I'm thinking back to college. I mean, one thing, one thing that comes to mind is like, we've always loved rap music, but just the audacity of the lyrics is like an example of that where it's like, this is so over the top and hilarious.

• 22:03Stavros Halkias?

  Maybe Lil Wayne's mixtape run was kind of like the beginning of us both loving something and being like, that's a crazy lyric. You know what I mean? Like that maybe that is an interesting, that's that might be true. And then obviously when 2 Chainz was coming out, he had some bangers. Rick Ross had some great stuff that you could.

• 22:23Speaker 03

  I think like the first time I saw something and was like personally offended, not cuz anything they did, just cuz I was like, this is so bad that it's like, I feel disrespected. I saw it at the movies. It was like scary movie like five.

• 22:38Stavros Halkias?

  That actually might be it, dude.

• 22:40Speaker 03

  It was like scary movie five. Dude, I saw it at the theaters. I've never seen this before. It was a packed theater. The the credits go, people got up and booed.

• 22:49Speaker 03

  Like the director wasn't there.

• 22:53Speaker 03

  People just wanted the theater to know that they were mad about what they just witnessed.

• 22:57Stavros Halkias?

  You know what's funny, dude? I think you're right because I love the scary movies.

• 23:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:01Stavros Halkias?

  The first, maybe even up to three.

• 23:03Speaker 03

  Maybe up to three. One and two are great.

• 23:05Stavros Halkias?

  One and two, Unimpeachable. Three, I wanna say it was actually a pretty good time.

• 23:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:09Stavros Halkias?

  I don't remember. It was either four or five. Yeah, dude, you're, I'm having a flashback too. Cuz like, and what's funny is Simon Rex is in those and we went on to Love. That was a, that was a guy we loved when he was like doing like, you know, weird rapping uh, in that MySpace era. He was fucking awesome, but.

• 23:27Speaker 04

  Dirt nasty.

• 23:28Stavros Halkias?

  Dirt nasty. We loved him as Dirt Nasty, but I remember that and and cuz the other thing is, we didn't, I didn't do any research. It wasn't like you, we look up a movie. I got there and I was like, where the fuck are the Wayans brothers? It's like people you don't know at all. It's like by the fifth one, I don't even think like any of the original cast members were in it.

• 23:46Speaker 03

  No, they left after two.

• 23:48Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, but I think the third one had, they weren't there, but I think they had other original cast.

• 23:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, they had other original cast members. Wasn't there. Those, those guys are good at that type of movie.

• 23:59Stavros Halkias?

  They're so good.

• 24:00Speaker 03

  They're one of the best. I mean, they like that airplane type of like.

• 24:03Stavros Halkias?

  So good.

• 24:03Speaker 03

  Slapstick.

• 24:04Stavros Halkias?

  Dude, they were so good. And, and now they're making a new one. They, they actually got them back to make like a six.

• 24:08Speaker 03

  But part five, dude, I remember watching it and I was like.

• 24:11Stavros Halkias?

  Who's in part five? Let's find.

• 24:12Speaker 03

  Charlie Sheen.

• 24:13Stavros Halkias?

  Charlie Sheen. Yes, dude, this is, it's so funny. We were having this exact experience at the same time on Up and Down Ninety Five. Wow, I mean, no one's in it. Yeah, Simon Rex, Terry Crew, Mac Miller was in it. May he rest in peace. Ashley Tisdale, Charlie Sheen. Yeah, I mean, that's, that's tough.

• 24:33Speaker 03

  I mean, that's a who's who of comedy genius, but they, they, they have like good people like Cat is in it, but it's like.

• 24:41Stavros Halkias?

  Daryl Hammond was in it. He's the man. But yeah, no, that's a good one. Like for example, I saw Juana Man in theaters and was like, that was good.

• 24:49Speaker 03

  Me too.

• 24:53Speaker 03

  You haven't named a bad movie yet.

• 24:56Stavros Halkias?

  But that's interesting. Yeah. Scary movie might be, yeah, what's the first thing you saw and we're like, wait, this sucks.

• 25:03Speaker 04

  What was that one Oui Bowl movie that started with like a nine eleven scene? I don't know if that's the first, but that's like an early example I could think of that just something so purely edgelord. Troll, not even funny, but just like exist to be provocative and we were just like. A little in wonderment of like how stupid and like.

• 25:25Stavros Halkias?

  I don't think I even saw it though. I think I was just like, you know, being like, oh, that's, that's gonna be.

• 25:31Speaker 04

  We didn't see it, but I remember we were like, we thought like that scene.

• 25:35Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, cause in, in two thousand nine, to do a joke of a guy hitting the twin towers, that still hit. That still was like all day.

• 25:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:45Stavros Halkias?

  Now, fucking seven year olds will make a Twin Towers joke the way we would make Pearl Harbor jokes.

• 25:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:51Stavros Halkias?

  Like to them, they don't fucking give a fuck.

• 25:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:53Stavros Halkias?

  But at the time.

• 25:54Speaker 03

  What's fascinating with me with like movies or even stand up specials where I like my mind starts to think like, how many people before this got to me, how many people saw this and was like, yeah, let's put this out.

• 26:07Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:08Speaker 03

  Like this is something, this is something good.

• 26:10Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, with movies, it's even crazier.

• 26:12Speaker 03

  That's what I'm saying.

• 26:12Stavros Halkias?

  Cause like, I mean.

• 26:13Speaker 03

  They do like, they do like, like they'll, they'll screen it for people.

• 26:16Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 26:16Speaker 03

  And people will be like, yeah, this is fucking awesome.

• 26:19Stavros Halkias?

  Hundreds of people, even on a low budget movie, hundreds of people work on a movie.

• 26:23Speaker 03

  Right.

• 26:24Stavros Halkias?

  No one says shit at any point.

• 26:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:25Stavros Halkias?

  People see the script, people see the, it's like all the actors like, yeah, okay. Everyone, everyone's just like, whatever.

• 26:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:32Stavros Halkias?

  It's fucking, we're just doing it.

• 26:33Speaker 03

  Yeah. I wonder if like, if I, cause I think what happens is you get sucked up into the vacuum and you start to just, it, it becomes like an echo chamber where everyone is just like, this is good. So I guess you start to believe that it's true.

• 26:44Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:44Speaker 03

  But I wonder if I was like on set, if I'd be able to say like, this is garbage. Like this is not.

• 26:49Stavros Halkias?

  I'm trying to say, yeah, yeah, yeah. You, you probably feel it, but you're like, maybe you're like, what the fuck am I going to do about it? I'm here.

• 26:56Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'll definitely take up the, the check and do a bad movie for sure. I would love to.

• 26:59Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:01Speaker 03

  But I would come on a podcast and talk shit about it.

• 27:03Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah. The Tim Dillon approach.

• 27:05Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:05Stavros Halkias?

  To Joker. I mean, that motherfucker's been trashing Joker in a hysterical way. He's the, he's the man for that one.

• 27:13Speaker 03

  That was a bad one.

• 27:13Stavros Halkias?

  I know. I, that one I'm interested to see because I think it might be so bad. It's like, one of those things where people are like, this isn't even bad good.

• 27:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:22Stavros Halkias?

  And I'm like, we'll see about that.

• 27:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:25Stavros Halkias?

  Like I, we have to watch it actually elders. We should do our official review of Joker.

• 27:29Speaker 03

  No, there's a level of bad where you get offended. Like you get like.

• 27:32Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, you know what else? The fucking, the, that Mark Wahlberg, the plants are killing people movie? I saw that.

• 27:39Speaker 03

  I never saw that.

• 27:40Stavros Halkias?

  The happening, maybe? Is that what it's called?

• 27:43Speaker 03

  I, I think that like, there's like a level of bad where you're like, this is bad, this is not for me.

• 27:48Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 27:49Speaker 03

  And then there's a level of bad where you're like, like you wanna write your senators.

• 27:52Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:54Speaker 03

  And like get the kid removed.

• 27:55Stavros Halkias?

  What about when you were a little kid, was there something that, I'm trying to think if there's like a Disney movie I hate, or like, what's the very first like memory you could have of some being like, yuck? Cause it is funny when a little kid really doesn't like something.

• 28:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:09Stavros Halkias?

  They won't fucking hide it at all. Have you seen?

• 28:11Speaker 03

  Really, I think it's tough, like kids, what do, like, I can't think of like a kid not liking something.

• 28:16Stavros Halkias?

  Have you, have you ever seen your nieces reject something?

• 28:20Speaker 04

  Uh, my wife tried to sit my niece down to make her watch like the original like Beauty and the Beast, cause she just loved it so much when she was a kid.

• 28:28Speaker 03

  That's a classic, yeah.

• 28:28Speaker 04

  And like, my niece was like just bawling, cause it looks like old bullshit if you're a kid. Like the animation is completely different than it was now.

• 28:36Stavros Halkias?

  She was the AI bullshit?

• 28:38Speaker 04

  And she was like, you know, she like, my, my wife had a wager with her, she's like, just watch it for five minutes, and if you don't like it, we can turn it off.

• 28:46Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 28:47Speaker 04

  And she was like counting down the clock when she was like three years old, she was like, it's five minutes up, like, I don't wanna watch this.

• 28:53Stavros Halkias?

  Owned your wife, dude, that's tough. Losing a battle of wills to a three year old. You gotta respect her for at least hanging in for that five minutes.

• 29:02Speaker 04

  I had moments like that when I was a kid, like, you know, I loved Rugrats, Doug, all that classic shit. Then like, the new wave of cartoons comes in and like you, you just like don't like it, you're not into it.

• 29:15Stavros Halkias?

  Hmm.

• 29:15Speaker 04

  And it's probably just as I was getting older, but I was like, oh, this isn't anywhere as good as fucking Rugrats.

• 29:20Stavros Halkias?

  It starts so early, yeah.

• 29:22Speaker 03

  I wonder what's the age, like, what's the age where you're literally like, as a kid, like, this fucking sucks? This is garbage.

• 29:29Stavros Halkias?

  I feel like we're seeing more kids say that now. I feel like kids are pickier now. What's basically you mean?

• 29:35Speaker 03

  Cause sometimes it's cool to say something sucks.

• 29:37Stavros Halkias?

  Well, like, for example, our friend has a baby and that motherfucker, if you're not putting on Finding Nemo, he's not interested.

• 29:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:44Stavros Halkias?

  He's two, you know what I mean? Like, so to him, or like, he'll watch Cars, you know what I mean? But like, it is interesting, I wonder how many little ass kids have, if that's where they have to start. The first generation of like, the Pixar kinda computery ones.

• 29:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:58Stavros Halkias?

  And if they'll watch like, cause I, I, I, I feel for your wife, cause I've thought that too, it's like, you know, uh, if someone in my family has a kid, I'm like, oh, I wanna watch the shit I liked as a little kid, but it's like, you know, they're not gonna wa- wanna watch a lot, and they're not gonna watch Peewee's Playhouse. Like, Peewee's Playhouse to a little kid, it's like, a bunch of people.

• 30:17Speaker 03

  No. Also, I feel like a lot of the stuff we watched when we were kids, now as adults, we look back and you're like, this had weird sexual content. This had a weird sexual undertone.

• 30:29Stavros Halkias?

  Well, it's definitely all the Nickelodeon shit with that, that fat, you know, there's that fat pervert who was like fucking giving.

• 30:34Speaker 03

  SpongeBob has like sex jokes in it, like, it legitimately has like, like, that's what she said type jokes for kids.

• 30:42Stavros Halkias?

  Shout out, you know what, I was, uh, I was not, I didn't like SpongeBob when he first came out, but I, I, uh, changed my tune later on.

• 30:49Speaker 03

  Oh, SpongeBob's great.

• 30:50Stavros Halkias?

  No, it's a banger, but I remember being, I think it was a little bit of what you're describing where it was like, this isn't Rocco's modern life.

• 30:56Speaker 04

  I was a little like that too, but the consistency of SpongeBob, it's like, I, I wa- I got one over even like in middle school and I was done with cartoons or something.

• 31:05Stavros Halkias?

  No, no, for sure, absolutely, that was one that you're like, cause it ca- it caught us generationally at a time where it's like, I'm not a fucking little ass kid, I'm not watching you cartoons. And then you just watch it, you just watch it as a man in middle school, you're like.

• 31:19Speaker 03

  SpongeBob might be the Seinfeld of cartoons.

• 31:22Stavros Halkias?

  Ooh, that's interesting.

• 31:25Speaker 03

  But like, it's a thing where.

• 31:26Stavros Halkias?

  That's interesting.

• 31:28Speaker 03

  When you watch it, you're like, objectively, this is really good.

• 31:31Stavros Halkias?

  This is putting out good stuff.

• 31:33Speaker 03

  They're trying to find a formula for a Krabby Patty. This is not, this is good. This is good.

• 31:36Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, well-defined characters.

• 31:38Speaker 03

  Right.

• 31:39Stavros Halkias?

  Honestly, characters that do, the same way you watch Seinfeld, still holds up in a way that I don't think shit from like, you know, like Seinfeld now is what, 30 years old?

• 31:50Speaker 03

  30, yeah.

• 31:51Stavros Halkias?

  40 years old almost?

• 31:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, 30, yeah.

• 31:52Stavros Halkias?

  30, yeah. 30 years is, that's a lot, and it still holds up. Same way, it's like, you recognize the characters, the archetypes.

• 32:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:00Stavros Halkias?

  SpongeBob, the archetypes are pretty good.

• 32:02Speaker 03

  They're good.

• 32:03Stavros Halkias?

  Doofus, Try, you know, his Doofus friend, the Tryhard SpongeBob.

• 32:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:08Stavros Halkias?

  Squidward, just a fucking piece of shit, stick of...

• 32:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:11Stavros Halkias?

  Sandy, the enthusiastic girl that no one has a chance at fucking, but they all secretly want to.

• 32:16Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:16Stavros Halkias?

  You know, that's the subtext there.

• 32:18Speaker 03

  Sandy's like Elaine.

• 32:19Stavros Halkias?

  Yes!

• 32:23Stavros Halkias?

  That is true.

• 32:24Speaker 03

  It's the SpongeBob cartoon.

• 32:25Stavros Halkias?

  It's kinda like, yeah. It's almost like Kramer, Kramer SpongeBob, though, I feel like. Anyway.

• 32:32Speaker 03

  Or, no, Kramer, couldn't Kramer be Patrick?

• 32:37Speaker 03

  Cause Patrick is like, a little goofy, and he does like goofy shit.

• 32:40Stavros Halkias?

  The thing, the thing with Seinfeld was that Seinfeld was the one, he was the blank slate that you could project anything onto.

• 32:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:49Stavros Halkias?

  He really didn't have much personality in the show. It was about everybody else.

• 32:52Speaker 03

  Right.

• 32:53Stavros Halkias?

  And he was the, he was kinda the straight man, even though he was the stand-up comic.

• 32:56Speaker 03

  Right, right.

• 32:57Stavros Halkias?

  Everyone else, and so it's like SpongeBob's definitely not the straight man. If anything, Squidward is the closest thing to the straight. Squidward might be Jerry, honestly. Interestingly enough.

• 33:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, maybe, maybe.

• 33:08Stavros Halkias?

  In some ways. It's not, it's not a one-for-one, but I take your, I take your point of like, as a kids cartoon, cause then obviously we can start thinking, even though The Simpsons are, it's a different division than Simpsons and all that other stuff.

• 33:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:22Stavros Halkias?

  Kids cartoon, SpongeBob being Seinfeld is a pretty good take. I like that.

• 33:26Speaker 03

  It's not bad. I just had like a, I just had like a weird moment where I'm like, man, this is where we are, like in media. Like, we're having an introspective conversation about whether SpongeBob and Seinfeld, the correlations they had as a cartoon. And we're having an earnest conversation. And your listeners are gonna listen to it and be like, this is like, this is good.

• 33:45Stavros Halkias?

  I think this might be the most thought-provoking question we've ever introduced on the podcast.

• 33:52Speaker 03

  Man, I love this pod. They really get into it. They really...

• 33:56Stavros Halkias?

  Uh, fuck dude. Were you like, were you like, uh, would you, were you like a latchkey kid? Did you just watch TV by yourself?

• 34:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, I did. I did watch TV by myself, but I was the youngest of like five, so it's like.

• 34:09Stavros Halkias?

  Really? I never, somehow I feel like I never even knew that.

• 34:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so, so growing up, like I had older sisters and brothers and, you know, when you have older, sometimes you just wanna watch what they want. Like, I remember watching Jamie Foxx, I Might Need Security, his stand-up special when I was like six.

• 34:25Stavros Halkias?

  That's awesome.

• 34:26Speaker 03

  And he's talking about like sleeping with J-Lo.

• 34:31Speaker 03

  That was like my first introduction to stand-up. So I used to watch like Hey Arnold, but then I would watch like, you know, Def Comedy Jam when it got brought back.

• 34:39Stavros Halkias?

  That's so funny, at six?

• 34:41Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:42Stavros Halkias?

  How, what was the clo- what were the ages? What are we talking, like who's the closest to you?

• 34:45Speaker 03

  I have one sister who's, who's a year older than me and then the rest are a lot, cuz my mom, she was married two times. And, um, I have one sister who's like ten, then I, my brother, my brother's ten years older, my sister's like fifteen and another sister's like seventeen.

• 34:57Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, so your brother who was ten years older, was he around?

• 34:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, we all lived, we all grew up in the same house, so I was like, you know.

• 35:04Stavros Halkias?

  So you were like a really like, almost like the mascot of the family, you're the baby?

• 35:07Speaker 03

  Kinda, but I was, I wasn't like, I'm not like a, oh, look at me guy. I was kinda like the quiet, like watching.

• 35:13Stavros Halkias?

  Was your sister more like that? Cause you two were the babies of the family.

• 35:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, no, actually none of us were like that. No, yeah, it was weird cuz I, we didn't, we just didn't have that dynamic. We were kinda all just like, I wasn't like a mute, but I wasn't like.

• 35:25Stavros Halkias?

  Everybody was like roommate, polite roommates too?

• 35:29Speaker 03

  My mom ran a tight shit.

• 35:30Stavros Halkias?

  Everybody was all business?

• 35:32Speaker 03

  Yeah. We used to put on our suits, watch Friday night movie and then go to sleep at a decent time.

• 35:39Stavros Halkias?

  That's so fucking funny.

• 35:41Speaker 03

  It's funny when you go to like, you know, you do like these like meetings or whatever with like, uh, industry people. And they, especially if you're a minority, they want you to say that like you came from like a crack house. That, that like, I had to sell crack when I was six years old just to keep the lights on.

• 35:54Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 35:54Speaker 03

  That's like, they're digging for that and you're like, you don't have it.

• 35:56Stavros Halkias?

  Tell me some trauma.

• 35:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'm like, I don't know, sometimes my mom wouldn't cook on Friday, she'd order Chinese food.

• 36:04Speaker 03

  They're like, cuz she was prostituting herself? I'm like, no, I just think she was tired from work.

• 36:08Stavros Halkias?

  She was taking, uh, night classes to go to law school?

• 36:13Speaker 03

  And they're like, hmm. She's a little tired.

• 36:14Stavros Halkias?

  You see them get mad?

• 36:17Stavros Halkias?

  You see them get mad cuz you didn't get molested?

• 36:21Stavros Halkias?

  And your uncle, he uh, he took some liberties? No, he just needed to get back on his feet in between consulting gigs.

• 36:30Stavros Halkias?

  Had made some bad investments, didn't play the market exactly right, so he just crashed with us for a month until he got a new head spun job.

• 36:38Speaker 03

  He used to do the dishes, we didn't have a dishwasher, is that trauma? Most people have a dishwasher, we didn't, he would wash the dishes, it was fine.

• 36:45Stavros Halkias?

  Have you seen Julio Torres's show about the?

• 36:50Speaker 03

  The Shapes thing?

• 36:51Stavros Halkias?

  No, he did, Shapes was a special, I think, but he has a show called Phantasmas, which is fucking hysterical and it does, it talks a lot about that where it's like, that's, that's a running theme about like, trying to get him to make something about, you know, his, his poor abuela, you know what I mean? Like, he's just trying to make his own shit and they're like, it's so fucking funny. Speaking of gay shit, gay comedy that I love, that's one of the gayest shows they're making and it's fucking hilarious.

• 37:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, I gotta check that out.

• 37:19Stavros Halkias?

  It's so funny, but it deals with that exact theme of like, them wanting to tap, you to tap dance, but in a different way, like.

• 37:26Speaker 03

  Right, right, yeah, yeah, no dude, that happens, that happens a lot, like, it happens a lot, and that's kind of what I'm worried with now, cause I feel like, the pendulum just swings and now I'm like, I thought we was out of that woke thing, and I feel like now, in response to like, the new president, it's just gonna swing back, and I don't want it to swing back, I don't want it to be.

• 37:46Stavros Halkias?

  I'm a little worried about that too, I think, I do think, cause it's not, you can't even pretend to that like, anti cancel culture shit is rebellious when it's, you know, there's a Republican billionaire in office, you know what I mean? Like, you can't pretend, it's like, yeah, no one like, I, my hope is that people that talk about all this woke bullshit, realize that like, just policing people's behavior means absolutely nothing, you're not making a fucking difference. That people, we have to abandon that shit and actually talk about the reasons people act out in ways that are fucked, because it's like, yeah, I'm not gonna say there's not racism and homophobia and shit like that, but it's like,

• 38:26Stavros Halkias?

  nobody's offering people any solutions, Democrats aren't saying, Democrats are pretending shit's good. So then if your only other option is like, well, it's actually Latinos and gay guys, that's the reason your life's bad?

• 38:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:38Stavros Halkias?

  People who are fucking dumb and poor are gonna be like. Yeah, it is fucking Latinos and gay guys. Whereas like you could say rich guys are fucking, but it's so. My hope is that the like, not that there even is a left in this country anymore. Democrats are now fucking just moderate Republicans. But my hope is that like there will be a real left that talks about economic issues. Because like, that's what happens. Rich people try, like the party of the rich wants to fucking keep people, like wants to pretend it's cultural issues, whether it's race, gay, whatever the fuck. Even gender now with like taking away fucking abortion rights. They want to pretend that that is what's keeping you apart where it's like, it's always economics.

• 39:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:22Stavros Halkias?

  It's always that rich people want to take your money. They want, they don't want ta, they want to be the ones that don't pay taxes and make all their money off of your, off your back and off your work, but.

• 39:31Speaker 03

  I think, I think in entertainment, sometimes I, I find that like we have such a quick, like how quickly we forget. Like, I don't think, wh- while, while Trump was in office the last time, I don't think there was a worse time for like a straight white man. I don't think in like, in like, history of America, like I don't think there was a worse time. To be in the sense of like, the, eh, the woke movement had them pinned down. Trump got out of office and the woke movement kind of shifted and those guys all got elevated and became super famous. So like the narrative of like, we want to go back to that, thinking it's like a bashing of like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you forget that that was like the toughest?

• 40:06Stavros Halkias?

  The worst, yeah, yeah.

• 40:08Speaker 03

  There were so many people who deserved, like were funny and killing it and deserved specials and deserved things. And the industry was literally like, we're not taking white guys. And I'm like, did you forget that?

• 40:17Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, they don't, they, they don't understand. Yeah, it is fucking stupid. And I hope that, cause people, people want to pretend they're doing something and they're like, uh, acting like they're offended at, at a racy joke. It's like. You could have just like done something to stop him from getting an office. You know what I mean?

• 40:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:37Stavros Halkias?

  Instead, now that he's won, they have to show. It's like that showing you're a good guy and not doing anything.

• 40:42Speaker 03

  Yeah. I think it's weird too, like as comedians now, like we're like, they're like getting into like political.

• 40:48Stavros Halkias?

  It sucks.

• 40:48Speaker 03

  That's so, that's so strange.

• 40:49Stavros Halkias?

  Dude.

• 40:50Speaker 03

  I thought we were supposed to like be objective and be like, look at these two assholes.

• 40:53Stavros Halkias?

  I'm really, I know dude, I'm really worried, it's like, cause I have very, I have my own beliefs, obviously, but it's like, I've tried to hold off.

• 41:01Speaker 03

  Of course.

• 41:01Stavros Halkias?

  But it does get to the point, just for the sake of comedy, but it's, it does, it is even getting to the point where I'm like, at some point it becomes like, you kind of have to say something if half of the industry is like, actively champion, championing some shit that I know is, that I personally believe is fucked up. I'm trying to hold off, I'm not, you know, we're, we're all friends here, this is my personal podcast, but I never want to fucking, you don't want to be the person who's like hours about that. It sucks.

• 41:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, I mean, dude, yeah, like, I, I mean, I, I hope, I hope we just, I hope we're just going through an era and like we move, we move. Cause I, I, I, I understand there's a space for like, like you said, that introspective, thought provoking comedy. But the fact that everyone has to be doing that.

• 41:44Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, and some of the dumbest people you've ever met in your life. Some of the truly stupidest people on earth are trying to do that shit.

• 41:51Speaker 03

  Truly, well, I'm like, I, I mean, look, my act is about women calling me gay.

• 41:58Speaker 03

  That's my fight.

• 41:59Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, as a small, as a small fashionable man.

• 42:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 42:02Stavros Halkias?

  You're gonna be fighting that fight.

• 42:04Speaker 03

  Right, I had a mustache, that's what my act is about.

• 42:06Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I wanted to ask you about that, you're coming on my, on the mustache corner dude.

• 42:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 42:10Stavros Halkias?

  But yours was very nice and.

• 42:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, I had a mustache, I was, you know, I was just.

• 42:14Stavros Halkias?

  What were you thinking about that?

• 42:16Speaker 03

  I was just going through, I was like, let me just try something different, it, it worked, it worked, it opened up, it opened up a, a door for like, it was like older women were thinking I was like attractive, who.

• 42:26Stavros Halkias?

  Really?

• 42:27Speaker 03

  You know, yeah.

• 42:27Stavros Halkias?

  You get the little mustache.

• 42:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're like, wow, you remind me of like my boyfriend in the eighties.

• 42:34Speaker 03

  Which that was nice, and then other guys with mustache, we'd have that, where they'd be like, what do you do for the?

• 42:39Stavros Halkias?

  The mustache bro.

• 42:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was, that was nice.

• 42:42Stavros Halkias?

  Are you interested in an older woman?

• 42:45Speaker 03

  I mean, I I guess it depends. I'm not like, I think it's weird to go outside and be like, I want an older woman.

• 42:51Stavros Halkias?

  Sure.

• 42:52Speaker 03

  Like a girl your age comes by, you just give her like a stiff.

• 42:54Stavros Halkias?

  Of course.

• 42:54Speaker 03

  Get the fuck out of here.

• 42:55Stavros Halkias?

  You don't have like a defined type in that way.

• 42:57Speaker 03

  No, no, I don't think so. I I I I'm open.

• 43:00Stavros Halkias?

  Sure.

• 43:00Speaker 03

  I'm open, but then it's like, I'm kind of worried of like, I like a friend of mine, she told me she was dating a guy who was thirty years older than her.

• 43:09Stavros Halkias?

  Wow.

• 43:10Speaker 03

  And at the time, he was like fifty-five or some, and I was just like, you have like five more years before he's like.

• 43:19Speaker 03

  I'm like, like you really have like five more years before the man is sixty. Like, have you thought about this at all?

• 43:25Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 43:26Speaker 03

  And she was like, yeah, like I thought about it. I'm like, I don't think you're thinking about this.

• 43:32Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I think, yeah, I mean, it is obviously case by case. I mean, there's, it depends who you marry, right? What it's like, I marry a, I'm I'm a thirty-five-year-old obese man, like, you know, Mediterranean man. And if I marry, there's sixty-five-year-old Asian women now that will outlive me. You know what I mean? Like, so it kind of depends if your if your friend is like, uh, you know, if your friend is kind of a, you know, mess that's gonna die early, maybe date a, date somebody that's gonna, you know, that might hold up.

• 44:05Speaker 03

  But even that, it's not even the fact about living, because you could live to a hundred, but it's like, do you want to be sixty years old dating a hundred-year-old?

• 44:13Speaker 03

  Even even if they're alive, is that the life you want? I mean, the like, you have like fifteen years before you're literally taking care of this person like they're the elderly.

• 44:21Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right, right.

• 44:22Speaker 03

  You're literally having to like, like, get your soup, like.

• 44:25Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right, right.

• 44:26Speaker 03

  Is that the life you want from forty on?

• 44:28Stavros Halkias?

  That's an interesting, that's an interesting conundrum. Some women appear to want that, weirdly.

• 44:33Speaker 03

  Well, women like, women like older, like older is like an attractive thing, which when I was a younger dude, I was like, what's that about? But now when I'm like in my mid-thirties, I'm like, ah.

• 44:41Stavros Halkias?

  You're like, nice, time to collect.

• 44:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 44:43Stavros Halkias?

  Time to collect on all the pussy I lost to thirty-five-year-olds when I was twenty-one.

• 44:49Stavros Halkias?

  Hey, I'm right there with you, brother. I've definitely had that thought. I'm like, yeah, I get it.

• 44:55Speaker 03

  Dude, not to bring back the PC thing, but I was thinking about this when I was coming to, cause like, the, the, it's so funny, cause like, the PC guys, like, they, they're like, like, the anti-woke, they're like, we can't say anything, which I'm like, just say the thing.

• 45:08Stavros Halkias?

  You can say whatever you want.

• 45:09Speaker 03

  Just say it, and let whatever happens, happens. Stop trying to fight. I'm like, Star Rose, you, you tweet out, you know?

• 45:16Speaker 03

  Just wrapped up on a movie with love, head.

• 45:21Speaker 03

  Like, you're literally leaving like a Netflix filming, like, oh, today was a long day. I would love it if a young woman just came over and gave me head.

• 45:31Stavros Halkias?

  It's true. That is what I would love.

• 45:35Speaker 03

  And everyone's like, aww, he's so earnest.

• 45:39Speaker 03

  This man is so true, he's a truth teller.

• 45:41Stavros Halkias?

  You just gotta be yourself, man.

• 45:43Speaker 03

  And I've never heard you be like, aw, man, I can't say what I want to say.

• 45:46Stavros Halkias?

  No, I think it's, I, I, you obviously can say whatever the fuck you want to say. That's the craziest thing. The only thing you really might get in trouble for is dropping an N-bomb. That's really the hardest, and it's like, why do you want to say that? You know what I mean?

• 46:00Speaker 03

  That's weird.

• 46:01Stavros Halkias?

  Like, or, or, uh, you know, the classic F, homophobic F slur.

• 46:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:07Stavros Halkias?

  You know what I mean? It's like.

• 46:08Speaker 03

  Which, sure, it's hilarious.

• 46:09Stavros Halkias?

  It's, it's funny in certain circumstances.

• 46:12Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 46:12Stavros Halkias?

  When Eldis is dressed a certain way.

• 46:15Speaker 03

  Right.

• 46:15Stavros Halkias?

  You want to call him that.

• 46:16Speaker 03

  Of course, of course, I want to, I want to say that to him.

• 46:20Stavros Halkias?

  Of course. He's trying out stripes that don't really suit him.

• 46:24Speaker 03

  Right.

• 46:24Stavros Halkias?

  And it's whatever, man. You want it, you don't say. And is that, by the way, is that that big a deal? It's literally two.

• 46:31Speaker 03

  Right.

• 46:31Stavros Halkias?

  It's literally two words that you actually probably can't say most of the time, right?

• 46:37Speaker 03

  Yeah, but also, you, you, I think a lot of times, it's like, you could say it, but they want to remove themselves of the, of the, of the weight of having to make it good.

• 46:45Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 46:45Speaker 03

  It's like, you could say it if it's great.

• 46:47Stavros Halkias?

  Even that, yeah, but it has to be, the, the, yeah, it's, you're, you're walking a tightrope.

• 46:51Speaker 03

  Right.

• 46:51Stavros Halkias?

  And you can't fucking do it.

• 46:53Speaker 03

  Don't be like, give me a, a, a platform.

• 46:55Stavros Halkias?

  A really big ass, yeah, a really big ass fucking. sheet of plywood. Yeah, I wanna be able to stumble barely over plywood.

• 47:03Speaker 03

  Right, right, yeah, which is, you know, I it'll it'll swing back, which I'm I'm I I felt like it swung extremely one way and I'm I'm worried for the extreme swing back.

• 47:12Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 47:12Speaker 03

  I felt like we were in a good place.

• 47:14Stavros Halkias?

  We'll be fine, man. Who gives a fuck?

• 47:15Speaker 03

  Everybody was just saying whatever.

• 47:17Stavros Halkias?

  The world, it's all bullshit.

• 47:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 47:20Stavros Halkias?

  Damn, I uh, I get, what, oh yeah, I I'm still, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't realize the five, that's fucking crazy. So, but it was just like, and you grew up in Queens, right?

• 47:30Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:31Stavros Halkias?

  And so it was just like, you were in a, you know, five in, five siblings is still a lot, even if shit was nice and orderly.

• 47:37Speaker 03

  Yeah, but they were, the fact that they were so much older than me, by the time I was like in my teenage years, they were kinda out the house.

• 47:43Stavros Halkias?

  Got you.

• 47:43Speaker 03

  And they were kinda doing their own thing, so it wasn't, it wasn't like we was like, I remember till probably till I was like, maybe eleven, twelve, it was all of us. And after twelve, like, when I was twelve, my sister was like twenty-six and she got married.

• 47:55Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right.

• 47:56Speaker 03

  She left and my brother started, he was out, so it wasn't like.

• 47:58Stavros Halkias?

  That's a very immigrant, I mean, that's how fucking Greek people in Greece are, where it's like, you stay in the house until you get married.

• 48:03Speaker 03

  Right.

• 48:04Stavros Halkias?

  Actually, a lot of people in fucking Greek town are like that, weirdly, like where I grew up, they still kinda behave that way.

• 48:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 48:09Stavros Halkias?

  Um, you left, you were, you you weren't, you didn't wait till you got married?

• 48:13Speaker 03

  No, I didn't wait till I got married. I left my house, I mean, I went away to college and then when I came back, I I stood at home for a couple of years. And then I left at like twenty-eight, twenty-nine.

• 48:20Stavros Halkias?

  Okay.

• 48:21Speaker 03

  I got my own place. Um, but if it were up to my parents, yeah, they would be like, stay here forever. They'll be like, get married and move in.

• 48:29Speaker 03

  Take the basement apartment.

• 48:30Stavros Halkias?

  That's fucking hilarious.

• 48:31Speaker 03

  Which I kinda get, I kinda get it, like, I I don't, like, you know, you've heard this before, like, a lot of white parents, when they're like, when you turn eighteen, they're like, get the fuck out. Which is like, do you hate your kids?

• 48:40Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, it's so weird.

• 48:41Speaker 03

  Like, I I would think that, I, if I had kids, I would be like, yeah, you could.

• 48:45Stavros Halkias?

  Chill, I'd love to see you. I mean, there are those depressing statistics where it's like, when you fucking, by the time you leave for college, you've seen your parents like eighty percent of the time, you're gonna see them your whole life.

• 48:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 48:57Stavros Halkias?

  You know what I mean? Like, that shit's, and and then I think about it, I'm like. It is kind of like, I don't see, and I have a good relationship with my mom. I don't see her that much. You know what I mean? Like I, you know, it's, it is fucking wild and, and also there's something nice about, like I like the idea of being able to live near your friends or your family or whatever it is like. Uh, there is something, and also the way like humanity should be. You have a kid. It's nice if a fucking uncle or grandma or somebody is fucking right there.

• 49:24Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 49:25Stavros Halkias?

  Cause that's also how parents don't go crazy.

• 49:27Speaker 03

  Right, right.

• 49:27Stavros Halkias?

  It is kind of like more of a group family effort, but.

• 49:30Speaker 03

  Here's a, like, this is like a weird statistic that I just thought of when you said that. When I left my house, which was probably like twenty nine, when I moved out of my house, which was like right before covid. Um, cause I had, we had a three family and I had one of the apartments.

• 49:41Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, that's beautiful. That's a beautiful setup.

• 49:44Speaker 03

  I wanted my own space, so I moved out. When I moved out of my house, was, which was twenty twenty. I, my mom, who's since has passed away, she got sick, got cancer and passed away. I saw my mom, like after I moved out of my house, I saw my mom less than a hundred times.

• 49:58Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, dude.

• 49:59Speaker 03

  When I moved out, I had already saw her ninety five percent of the time.

• 50:01Stavros Halkias?

  That was most of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 50:03Speaker 03

  And then the, the rest of it was like, I saw, I used to come over and see her and holidays and stuff, but she only lived like three years past that. And I, I saw her less than a hundred times. So that's like a something to think about.

• 50:13Stavros Halkias?

  Totally, dude.

• 50:13Speaker 03

  We don't, we just kind of flow through life thinking that it'll be like forever, but it's not, so.

• 50:17Stavros Halkias?

  I know, that's the fuck, it's, it is fucking sad to be like, damn, I mean, we're, we're all at the fuck, we're all the same. You're thirty five?

• 50:25Speaker 03

  Thirty four.

• 50:25Stavros Halkias?

  Thirty four, yeah, we're all pretty much the same age. It's like, this is when it hits you that it's like, oh. It's the, the hearts at the top of the screen, they're not gonna go on forever. You know what I mean? They're, they're shrinking just a little bit. You know what I mean?

• 50:39Speaker 03

  Dude, I mean, I don't know when this happened. I think it was after thirty. Like I constantly walk around thinking that like I'm dying. Like, like physically, like I think, and I'm like pretty good in shape. I go to the gym and I'm like, I, I, I'll get chest pain and I'm like, here it is.

• 50:54Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, that's what you're thinking. What do you think? What do you think I'm thinking over here?

• 50:58Speaker 03

  What do other people think?

• 50:59Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, me, dude, I'm the same, but also for good reason. I mean, last year, on that last tour, I've been, I've talked about it, but it's like, I thought I was gonna die like half the nights. I was like, going to bed fucked up, I would take, you know, taking like pills, eating like shit. You know what I mean? And I was like-

• 51:18Speaker 03

  Dude, I thought like, cuz you, cuz I did a couple stops with you on this tour, and I went up there and I thought like, I was like, alright, I'm opening for a stop. I thought it was gonna be like backstage, it's gonna be like strippers like walking around in like panties. And it was gonna be like rock and roll. And then I show up and it's like a Thai, a Thai buffet.

• 51:39Speaker 03

  In between shows, you're like, we're like, we had this whole restaurant catering. And I'm like, well, this is nice, too.

• 51:46Stavros Halkias?

  We were eating and getting fucked up and yeah, I mean, it was Albany. I don't know what the pussy's looking like in Albany. There's cities where you're like, alright, we're gonna put, we're gonna think about the catering a little more than the after-party in certain cities. To be fair.

• 52:01Speaker 03

  I think, I think, actually, I think sometimes that's, when you go to like a shit city, like, not to say Albany's a shit city.

• 52:07Stavros Halkias?

  It is, no, it is, yeah.

• 52:09Speaker 03

  But that's not what I'm trying to say.

• 52:12Speaker 03

  But I think sometimes when you're, like, you're, you're playing the egg. This is like the big theater in Albany. It's like, the top notch of that city is gonna come out. Like, so that's kinda nice. Cause every city has a top.

• 52:25Stavros Halkias?

  Sure, sure, sure.

• 52:26Speaker 03

  Every, every city has like some hotties that are gonna move to like LA, Miami, or New York.

• 52:29Stavros Halkias?

  Sure, you gotta catch them.

• 52:31Speaker 03

  Before they go.

• 52:31Stavros Halkias?

  Before they go. That's true. That's a good point.

• 52:33Speaker 03

  Which is, are you going back out? Are you going back out?

• 52:35Stavros Halkias?

  We're going back out, actually, by the, yeah, by the time this episode comes out, the Dreamboat Tour is being advertised. If you're one of those top hotties in a city, uh-

• 52:43Speaker 03

  You can come for free.

• 52:44Stavros Halkias?

  You can, yeah, DM me, for real. DM me, picture your tits, we'll get you, we'll get you in there for free, no problem.

• 52:49Speaker 03

  Say anything.

• 52:52Stavros Halkias?

  Uh, fuck, you gotta come back again. We spent too much time talking about how annoyed we are at cancel culture warriors, but so yeah, go see Ian Hilarious, one of my favorites, and a just good comic who doesn't, is not gonna preach to you. We'll just write good jokes.

• 53:08Speaker 03

  Completely different now?

• 53:09Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, you go up there and you're like...

• 53:11Speaker 03

  You're like, "These fucking trans are trying to play..."

• 53:15Stavros Halkias?

  I go to bat for you, you're like, "Dude..."

• 53:17Speaker 03

  They're trying to play sports. They're trying to, they're trying to beat the shit out of your little girl.

• 53:21Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, this is something I really give a fuck about. Women's college tennis. Now I fucking care about that for some fucking reason. I'm the guy that talks about how boring the WNBA is, if you'll fucking let me hear it, but now I care about Division II women's col- minor college sports. Anyway, whatever. Eldis, hit us with a fucking question, little buddy.

• 53:45Speaker 00

  Time for a quick break to talk about McDonald's. It's the tangiest time of the year. For a limited time, head to McDonald's and get a McRib sandwich. Make it a meal by adding a medium fries and a soft drink like an ice cold Diet Dr. Pepper. So grab a McRib sandwich and embrace the tang. Save time by ordering ahead on the app. Participate in McDonald's for a limited time. Dr. Pepper is a registered trademark of Dr. Pepper, 7-Up Inc.

• 54:10Speaker 05

  With a good source of protein, Quaker Protein products offer a variety of delicious flavors and options from breakfast time to snack time. Think about it. You shower, get dressed, head out to drop off the kids, log on to meetings, follow up after meetings, hit the gym, pick up the kids, and you realize it's already time for dinner. From oatmeal and granola to bars and rice snacks, Quaker Protein products have options for the whole family. Get your protein with Quaker. Fuel to start whatever's next. Available at a store near you.

• 54:41Speaker 06

  Hey, Stavi. Not playing. Stavi baby. Hey, Stavi, Stavi baby, and Eldis. Um, weird thing, and I guess not that weird. I'm in a good relationship, like the best relationship I've ever been in.

• 54:57Stavros Halkias?

  Nice.

• 54:57Speaker 06

  Uh, my issue, though, is that I've just put on so much weight since I've been in this relationship. Like, I'm aware that, like, people get happy and they maybe put on extra weight, but I'm like 260 pounds now.

• 55:14Stavros Halkias?

  My goal weight?

• 55:14Speaker 06

  I've never been this big. I've always been in good...

• 55:16Stavros Halkias?

  My goal weight?

• 55:17Speaker 04

  How tall is he?

• 55:21Stavros Halkias?

  Would love to get a nice trim 260 again.

• 55:24Speaker 03

  Nice lean.

• 55:25Stavros Halkias?

  Nice lean 260 at 5'7". Go ahead, Eldis.

• 55:30Speaker 06

  I'm like 260 pounds now and I've never been this big. I've always been in good shape. And the problem is that whenever I like take my shirt off around my girlfriend, she's like, she gets turned on by it. She loves that I'm big. Like, she just loves my belly. And you're a big guy.

• 55:51Stavros Halkias?

  Eat the jackpot, pal.

• 55:54Speaker 06

  Is it weird that I like feel insecure about it? Cause like if she likes it, then who cares? I don't know. It is, like, is there, is there a way I could be like, hey, I like that you like that I'm sexy, but I don't like that I feel so fucking fat all the time.

• 56:14Stavros Halkias?

  Those ass hurt me, dude.

• 56:17Speaker 06

  I don't know.

• 56:17Stavros Halkias?

  His enunciation hit me.

• 56:20Speaker 06

  Feel this way about it, but I just like, I feel

• 56:25Speaker 06

  like this relationship has been so good, but mental, like physically, I'm like

• 56:31Speaker 06

  just not in a good place health-wise.

• 56:35Stavros Halkias?

  Interesting.

• 56:36Speaker 06

  So I don't know, one fat guy to another.

• 56:39Stavros Halkias?

  The, the hard F fat I've never felt before.

• 56:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, I, I, I feel like he's like roasting you.

• 56:45Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah. You're the fucking fat one. Yeah, and he's

• 56:49Speaker 03

  How do you deal with it?

• 56:50Stavros Halkias?

  And he's complaining that his girl wants to fuck him too much.

• 56:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. This is, this is strange.

• 56:55Stavros Halkias?

  This is, I mean, yeah, you're weak-minded, my friend. You have one of the most weak minds I've ever come across. You're basically letting, you're basically letting societal standards that your own girl that you love and say you're in a great relationship, your own girl doesn't subscribe to. You're letting what other people, other faceless, nameless people might think of you, affect how you see yourself, right? And look, I'm not gonna tell you that you should be fat, right? From a health perspective, obviously. Like if what if your diet has gone to shit. If there's things in your life that you wanna fucking take care of, that's fine, but. If you're in a place where your partner loves the way you look.

• 57:39Stavros Halkias?

  And you can adjust your habits to be healthy. Maybe you lose a little weight, maybe you start working out more and so you can become big in. A different way and maybe you kind of meet it halfway where. You know, you're you're taking care of your diet, you're not overdoing it. And you start to feel healthy and maybe you don't look. He also you're aging, maybe you don't look as good as you used to when you were younger, whatever. If you can get to a place where you feel healthy and you're still a little bigger than you you'd like. Who fucking you're being a fucking pussy about this. You're in a great spot right now and I wouldn't let this like it feels like to me. He's this is some like fat phobia that he's turning on to himself a little bit.

• 58:22Speaker 03

  You know what I mean? This reminds me a lot. I feel like women have this issue a lot sometimes where like they'll be like, you know. I hate my huge big titties.

• 58:32Speaker 03

  And then the man would be like, well, I love your big titties. And I'll be like, well, I wanna get a breast reduction and the man was like, well, I'll leave you. I'll leave you if you if you fuck up with the Lord.

• 58:43Stavros Halkias?

  What did you say?

• 58:44Speaker 03

  Right, I feel like this is just reversed, like this woman is like, don't you dare lose a pound.

• 58:49Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 58:49Speaker 03

  And he's like, but I don't feel sexy. It's just like.

• 58:51Stavros Halkias?

  Crazy. I hate to to sort of turn toxically mask. I hate to turn toxic mask. This is basically toxic masculinity versus. Fat phobia and I'm like fucking bitch, you know what I mean? You're being a fucking pussy chief.

• 59:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, two sixty, you know, I don't know, like, if he is, he's five feet, two sixty, that's that's huge, but two sixty is not terrible.

• 59:11Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 59:11Speaker 03

  And and you could if you could stay around there and still, you know, be active, don't be a slob, that's not bad.

• 59:17Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, exactly. And I do think I really think more than anything, this is. Your this is like internalized. Um, you know, your you don't feel hot the way. Traditionally, women struggle with, but it's like. Who is it? I guess the question is, who is? What about this? Really look at the the stem and the root of this feeling to you. Because for me, I can tell you personally, and maybe this is a little obvious to people. But like, I only ever. I mean, now I've gotten old enough where it is about my health. Because like, but when I was younger, it's like I only lost weight to get attention from women. It was never about anything else.

• 59:59Stavros Halkias?

  And that's my own issue, that I let that dictate a little too much of my thing. But it's like, um, there's also the exact, y- you could go a little bit opposite where it's like, this isn't even affecting how, this isn't even a positive to you. You seem so sad and you've kind of hit the jackpot. You fit a situation that most men would kill for. You get to get fucking chubby and your bitch loves it. And then, yeah dude, do some fucking bicep curls. Look, be like a stout bouncer type guy and eat a little less. If you're, if you're feeling unhealthy, fix the other parts of your life, but don't worry so much about your body. Work on how you think about yourself and, and think about why you're so judgmental uh to yourself.

• 1:00:41Speaker 03

  Dude, I, I once dated a girl and she was like a small, she was like a small girl. She was probably like five foot two, like petite girl. And her thing was she, she wanted a man that was like 300 plus.

• 1:00:53Stavros Halkias?

  What's she up to? I'll tell her to holler at me, dude.

• 1:00:59Speaker 03

  I felt the eye for this guy. I was like, I'll never be that.

• 1:01:03Speaker 03

  I could never be 300 plus pounds.

• 1:01:05Stavros Halkias?

  I have literally found, there have been times where I hooked up with somebody randomly, right? On one of my great solicitations that you talked about earlier, right? And I assume they were a fan or of some of the podcast of stand up, whatever. And I hooked up with a couple of girls who straight up did not really know who I was. And they liked fat guys and I was just like a, a fat guy on the internet that they wanted to fuck. There are people out there, they were hot, one for two. But they were, you know, one was very hot, one was fine, you know?

• 1:01:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:01:39Stavros Halkias?

  Uh, but. Um, but no, no, it's like the people exist like this and it's like they definitely and and he's and in his case, it's like. You found somebody who likes that. You need to figure out this is your own shit. You need to figure out what's at the center of it. And that's sort of more long term advice. Practical advice, I think you hit it on the head where it's just like. You're not, you know, as work out a little bit, don't get fucking, don't feel overly sloppy or whatever the fuck. But you're fine, dude.

• 1:02:10Speaker 03

  I feel like he should have sent a picture with this, uh.

• 1:02:13Stavros Halkias?

  Yes.

• 1:02:13Speaker 03

  Call.

• 1:02:13Stavros Halkias?

  I'd love to see how fat you are.

• 1:02:15Speaker 03

  So we could be like, oh.

• 1:02:17Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, we take it back.

• 1:02:19Speaker 03

  You gotta lose, fuck what she said. She's a maniac.

• 1:02:22Stavros Halkias?

  Your whole, yeah, your tits are so strange, dude. You've got the, I, I, I thank the Lord that he gave me the best fat loadout possible. This is the, you wanna have this kinda. You could weigh as much as me and be much fluffier and shittier and I've got, which people say is bad. Hard fat is actually really bad for your vital organs.

• 1:02:44Speaker 03

  It is.

• 1:02:44Stavros Halkias?

  But it looks good.

• 1:02:46Speaker 03

  It's bad.

• 1:02:46Stavros Halkias?

  The fluff, you wanna be a real fluffy guy, apparently.

• 1:02:49Speaker 03

  Do you think, what if, what if like, do you think if like, let's say you lost a hundred, a hundred pounds right now?

• 1:02:53Stavros Halkias?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:02:53Speaker 03

  Like.

• 1:02:54Stavros Halkias?

  Hundred, I could do no problem and I would still be fat, by the way.

• 1:02:56Speaker 03

  Really?

• 1:02:57Stavros Halkias?

  I would be, I'm probably three ten right now.

• 1:03:00Speaker 03

  So let's say you, let's say you got down to a lean one eighty. One eighty, five, seven, one eighty. Do you think, you think your career would change? Like.

• 1:03:08Stavros Halkias?

  It would change for sure. I mean, I think I would. First of all, I don't want to be one eight. That's weird to me. I would love legitimately to be two twenty. That's like the lowest I'd ever, and I'm five, that's like.

• 1:03:20Speaker 03

  Two twenty five, seven is big.

• 1:03:22Stavros Halkias?

  It's still pretty, I would still be in XLs probably.

• 1:03:24Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03:25Stavros Halkias?

  You know what I mean? But it's like, um, I don't, yeah, I just don't, I can't even ima- I don't know, what am I gonna go Al Sharpton mode? You see that motherfucker? He's skinny as fuck. It's so weird.

• 1:03:35Speaker 03

  The highest I got, the highest I ever got was one seventy.

• 1:03:38Stavros Halkias?

  Hmm.

• 1:03:38Speaker 03

  That was like the, the highest.

• 1:03:39Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:40Speaker 03

  And, uh. And

• 1:03:41Stavros Halkias?

  How did it feel for you as a one seventy?

• 1:03:43Speaker 03

  I felt, I felt sturdy.

• 1:03:45Stavros Halkias?

  Were you working out a bunch?

• 1:03:46Speaker 03

  No, I was, I was being slob, yeah.

• 1:03:50Speaker 03

  And I wasn't like crazy, but I felt, I felt sturdy.

• 1:03:53Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:54Speaker 03

  But I, but I, I, I just rather, like, I just look, I feel like I look better, like, sure, one sixty, one seventy.

• 1:04:00Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:04:01Speaker 03

  Which is like, but that's just what I'm used to, but I'm trying to see if like, if I got up to two twenty.

• 1:04:05Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, that'd be interesting.

• 1:04:07Speaker 03

  Two twenty is

• 1:04:08Stavros Halkias?

  I'd love to see that. I'd love to see you fat. I'd love to see everyone fat.

• 1:04:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, everyone to you.

• 1:04:12Stavros Halkias?

  I'd love to bring everybody over here, see what it's really like. See what, see, see, show them they can't hang, they can't swim in these waters.

• 1:04:22Stavros Halkias?

  But yeah, you gotta get over whatever the fuck's in your head. Sorry to dismiss you, but.

• 1:04:26Speaker 03

  You're sounding like a fucking bitch to me, dude.

• 1:04:29Stavros Halkias?

  Um, next question, Eldis.

• 1:04:31Speaker 03

  I love like he called for like earnest advice and then

• 1:04:33Stavros Halkias?

  We gave it to him.

• 1:04:34Speaker 03

  You sound like a little bitch.

• 1:04:35Stavros Halkias?

  We gave him.

• 1:04:38Stavros Halkias?

  We gave him what he needed to hear.

• 1:04:42Speaker 06

  Hey, Stavi. So I was in a relationship for most of my twenties and now, now that I'm thirty, I've had a year of being single for the first time.

• 1:04:52Stavros Halkias?

  Hmm.

• 1:04:53Speaker 06

  And I'm encountering all kinds of issues in relation to being a player, um, and balancing multiple women at one time. And the main issue for me is physical evidence. I've been decent with the phone and I'm, I can handle that, but a lot of these women seem to be uh, intentionally leaving evidence in my apartment to disrupt my relations with other women.

• 1:05:19Stavros Halkias?

  This guy's out of his, you think these bitches are the CIA, man?

• 1:05:22Speaker 03

  He thinks they're leaving like the leave behind. They're doing the leave behind in this apartment.

• 1:05:28Speaker 06

  And I, I clean my apartment, I vacuum, I do these things, but still, uh, there are issues. And I'm wondering, uh, I'll give some examples. Um, and I last found the ground. I did not know that was something that could happen. Um, and recently makeup on the wall.

• 1:05:47Stavros Halkias?

  Makeup on the wall, you pressing the bitch's face to the wall?

• 1:05:49Speaker 06

  And I think the worst one was behind a picture of my family. There was earrings. Um, which those have to be a hundred percent intentional. So my question to you is,

• 1:05:59Stavros Halkias?

  What?

• 1:06:00Speaker 06

  Is there a protocol for something like this as a man? Should we, um, sweep through the house?

• 1:06:06Stavros Halkias?

  Don't throw me in here.

• 1:06:07Speaker 06

  And make sure that the women, the woman from before didn't leave anything sneaky for another woman? Um, or should, am I wrong for even having women, two different women over?

• 1:06:21Stavros Halkias?

  This is, we're talking about two women.

• 1:06:23Speaker 06

  Um, I guess, have you ever encountered this issue in the lower of your?

• 1:06:27Stavros Halkias?

  This is crazy. Two women, you can't fucking, you can't keep, you can't keep the fucking, a little consistency between two women? So this guy is talking about, this is first, uh, he was saying this is his first time being single, pretty much. And he's, how old was he? I, I, I, the first?

• 1:06:42Speaker 04

  He just turned thirty, I think.

• 1:06:44Stavros Halkias?

  Okay.

• 1:06:44Speaker 04

  Or he's thirty.

• 1:06:46Stavros Halkias?

  And he's single for the first time. Most of my twenties, gotcha. Okay.

• 1:06:49Speaker 03

  Um. I got a, I got a specific move for this.

• 1:06:51Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, please.

• 1:06:53Speaker 03

  It'll work every time. So here's what you do. When you're about to bring a girl over for the first time, right? Like, let's say you got a girl coming over for the first time, but you recently had another girl that was over another time. What you do is you tell that girl that, like, the new girl that's coming over, in conversation, you mentioned that you had, like, your sister over the week before, or you had your cousins over the week before.

• 1:07:16Stavros Halkias?

  My cousins were missing.

• 1:07:17Speaker 03

  That you had, like, a little get together with, like, a bunch of, like, your female family members.

• 1:07:20Stavros Halkias?

  Family is so important to me.

• 1:07:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, and they, and they all came. So you'd be like, so you'll be like, hey, even if your apartment is fully clean, you're like, hey, I'm sorry if my apartment's a little crazy. My cousins were over and, you know, they're girls. They were, they're getting dressed.

• 1:07:34Stavros Halkias?

  And how about this? You say your cousins, you say female and male, and then you leave, like, a pair of Jordans that aren't your size on, also. So you're covered for the male thing.

• 1:07:43Speaker 03

  Right, right.

• 1:07:44Stavros Halkias?

  And then you also, oh, there's fucking Frank's shoes and fucking Sarah's earrings.

• 1:07:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, or here, whatever the case may be. So when, in the event that the girl you bring over does find something,

• 1:07:55Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:56Speaker 03

  she'll be like,

• 1:07:56Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, that's my cousin's butt plug.

• 1:07:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:08:01Stavros Halkias?

  That's my cousin's warming lube.

• 1:08:05Speaker 03

  I've used.

• 1:08:07Stavros Halkias?

  I've used the warming lube.

• 1:08:08Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, this, this is a kid.

• 1:08:12Stavros Halkias?

  Oh my god, my cousin left his sex pillow here.

• 1:08:18Stavros Halkias?

  Um, that's good, though. I like that. This, something about this, though, is, this guy's talking about two women. First of all, it's not wrong to date, as long as you're not lying to anyone.

• 1:08:29Speaker 03

  That's the main thing. I'm like, who gives a fuck if they find out?

• 1:08:31Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, this guy must not, this, this guy don't live in New York, I'll tell you that.

• 1:08:35Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:08:38Speaker 03

  You're telling me a girl you just met went on a day with and is coming back to your house to fuck you is concerned that there's another eyelash at your head? Like, what do you, what does she think you're doing?

• 1:08:46Stavros Halkias?

  Well, this, who knows where he's from, right? I don't know, let's not reveal the area code, but you want to look it up just so we can just see where it might be. Yeah, that ma, I mean, that's exactly right.

• 1:08:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:08:58Stavros Halkias?

  So this guy is not from a major metropolitan area.

• 1:09:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:09:01Stavros Halkias?

  These are, he's thirty, he's probably dating women around his age.

• 1:09:06Speaker 03

  Who like are trying to get married.

• 1:09:07Stavros Halkias?

  They want to get married. Like, if he's talking about two women and one, and that, what I was gonna say is, this is not really a player issue. This is a who you're dating issue, and one of these women is trying to sabotage you.

• 1:09:19Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:09:20Stavros Halkias?

  And you probably haven't been completely upfront about what you're looking for. You can tell by him being like, is it wrong to date two women at once? Like, he's literally thinking it's a moral issue. So he's, he's just not used to, you know, th- this kind of behavior. And so, it's not, if someone's trying to do this, then you're just like, he might be dating the wrong women if you want to continue being a thirty-year-old playboy in your, in your own words here. So, uh, that's really the issue. It's not like, you're not have to get a, have to get fucking a crime scene. You're not gonna get CSI over there to sweep your fucking apartment every time you fucking get your dick sucked after watching Hulu.

• 1:10:02Speaker 03

  Yeah. Also, I think, look, if you're, like, I gave you a way to lie, but also, I also believe that if you're in your thirties and you want to be a player, be a player. You don't gotta lie. You ain't looking for your wife. You ain't just. Yeah, somebody left her earrings. What?

• 1:10:16Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:10:17Speaker 03

  What to tell, I don't know what to tell you. Women, women fuck me.

• 1:10:19Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, yeah, friend. You literally be like, oh, yeah, a friend left those here.

• 1:10:23Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:10:23Stavros Halkias?

  What's she gonna, she's gonna press you, it's like? Yeah, we were dating, we used to da- like, whatever. It doesn't matter.

• 1:10:29Speaker 03

  Well, I don't get it, unless you're telling me it's your girlfriend finding stuff.

• 1:10:32Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 1:10:33Speaker 03

  That's a problem, but random girls, who cares what they find?

• 1:10:35Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I mean, you heard, hi- his, his voice was shaking talking to us. You think he could fucking be like, yeah. Yeah, it's different girls, what are you gonna do about it? Zip. Get the suckin' or get the truckin', whore. He's not gonna do that.

• 1:10:53Speaker 03

  That's the energy he shows.

• 1:10:54Stavros Halkias?

  I know, but he's not built for it.

• 1:10:56Speaker 03

  That New York energy.

• 1:10:58Stavros Halkias?

  The thing is, you're, you're enjoying the first and probably only time you're fucking multiple women at once. He's gonna get married, I bet he's gonna, he's, this guy's gonna end up getting married to the woman who put the earrings behind that picture.

• 1:11:10Speaker 03

  This guy will be married before this episode releases.

• 1:11:15Speaker 03

  We're a little backlogged, I can hear it in his voice.

• 1:11:20Stavros Halkias?

  So, yeah, man, that's, that's our, that's our, Ian gave you some cover, and, yeah, you just have to, I think you need to just be more selective in who you date. You can't be dating these, and be more o- honest about what your intentions are.

• 1:11:31Speaker 03

  It's weird that women are doing this, like, to him, too, 'cause I've never had that.

• 1:11:34Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, but again, New York City.

• 1:11:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:11:37Stavros Halkias?

  He's in, uh, the heartland, let's say, in a place where if you're thirty, you're probably trying to get married. You know what I mean? But it is weird, don't get me wrong. It's weird on both their ends, because clearly this is, it's insanely weirdly passive aggressive behavior on their part.

• 1:11:51Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:11:52Stavros Halkias?

  But he's also just not being upfront with. She probably gets an inkling that this is going on, doesn't, isn't gonna have the conversation. He has an inkling that she has an inkling, he's putting his fucking head in the sand and trying to get double sucked as much as possible. And that's what's going on here, there's no, there's a complete lack of communication on both ends. Yeah. Leading to insane behavior.

• 1:12:12Speaker 03

  The, the get the suckin' or get the truckin' is hilarious.

• 1:12:17Speaker 03

  I feel like that's like, that sounds like a far right campaign, like, they were doing this, like, to Kamala.

• 1:12:23Speaker 03

  What would you see at a Trump rally?

• 1:12:24Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, sure.

• 1:12:26Speaker 03

  Shit has nothing to do with politics. Like, what does this mean?

• 1:12:30Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, and, and I want to be clear. That is a phrase that we employ for non-political misogyny on this show.

• 1:12:38Stavros Halkias?

  Go ahead, Eldis.

• 1:12:39Speaker 03

  This is a two-minute.

• 1:12:41Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:41Speaker 07

  Hi, Bobby. Hi, Eldis. Hi, guest.

• 1:12:46Speaker 07

  I am looking for advice from a male perspective on an issue that I have because I really don't have any close male friends and I don't have like a cool older brother that I can talk to about something like this.

• 1:13:02Speaker 07

  So, I have been in the same relationship with my husband for 11 years.

• 1:13:09Speaker 07

  Married for three, so we dated for a long time. We were high school sweethearts. And, um, anyways, we've never had any problems. We're super compatible. You know, we don't fight a lot. But as soon as we bought a house and kind of added a layer of like responsibility, we did start to have some issues surrounding the fact that I'm the breadwinner and I was carrying most of the weight in terms of like bills. And, um, I think, you know, my husband started to feel insecure about, um, his role as like a husband and, um, as a man.

• 1:13:50Speaker 07

  And we did start to have some arguments surrounding finances.

• 1:13:59Speaker 07

  Anyways, one day I just like had this really weird feeling and I looked at the messages on his Apple Watch and I saw that he had texted his coworker, "Good morning, baby."

• 1:14:15Speaker 07

  At 8 a.m. on a Saturday.

• 1:14:16Stavros Halkias?

  This drunk motherfucker. This fucking guy needs to ask for fucking permission to buy a golf club and he's fucking texting bitches in his office, "Good morning, baby."

• 1:14:26Speaker 03

  He said, "Good morning, baby."

• 1:14:27Stavros Halkias?

  "Good morning, baby" at 8 a.m. is really tough. Really tough. And her ma- okay, keep going, Eldis.

• 1:14:35Speaker 07

  And her messages were silenced, which is a huge red flag, and there were no previous messages. Everything's been deleted.

• 1:14:42Stavros Halkias?

  Come on.

• 1:14:43Speaker 07

  Um, he told me and she told me that it was nothing more than a couple of weeks of innocent flirting.

• 1:14:49Stavros Halkias?

  Get the fuck out of here.

• 1:14:51Speaker 07

  Yeah, they've never done anything else and, um...

• 1:14:55Stavros Halkias?

  Your honor, I, I bought the cocaine. I never did the cocaine. You, yes, you did find cocaine. Look, I'm not gonna argue with you. You found cocaine in my jacket. I never opened it. I never did it. I mean, they just flirted and he's deleted all the, anyway, let's finish up, but come on. This is bad.

• 1:15:14Speaker 07

  I don't know, I'm just having a really hard time like accepting that answer and moving past it.

• 1:15:19Stavros Halkias?

  Yes.

• 1:15:20Speaker 07

  Because I just feel like I'll never really know the full truth and extent of it. Um... It's also probably important to mention that around the time of this fling, he stopped wearing his wedding ring to work.

• 1:15:35Stavros Halkias?

  Oh my god! What?

• 1:15:39Speaker 03

  Is this a prank?

• 1:15:40Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, Jesus Christ! Holy fuck, okay. This poor woman, yeah. Yeah, what work to fucking, yeah, where the fuck was he going? Best Buy? He fucking, he had a, he had a hard day of unlocking Fitbits for people. And he fucking, you know, that gets in the way, babe. You know, when I'm, when I'm, when I'm taking a Sonos, when I'm putting a Sonos in the back of a Toyota Highlander, I don't want my wedding ring to get snagged. Jesus Christ.

• 1:16:10Speaker 07

  Any advice that you could give to help me kind of feel less insecure about it? I obviously don't wanna throw away, you know, eleven plus years over, I don't know, innocent texting? Is that what it was?

• 1:16:26Stavros Halkias?

  Baby, come on, I mean...

• 1:16:27Speaker 03

  Good morning, baby, that's not innocent texting.

• 1:16:29Stavros Halkias?

  Good morning, baby, it's not in...

• 1:16:31Speaker 04

  On a Saturday, right?

• 1:16:32Stavros Halkias?

  On a fucking Saturday with the text deleted?

• 1:16:35Speaker 03

  That's not innocent texting and the, and the message is silenced. That's not innocent texting.

• 1:16:38Stavros Halkias?

  That's not, that's not. I mean, I know this is circumstantial evidence. You don't have the smoking gun, in theory, but... Good God almighty. I mean, this is crazy.

• 1:16:49Speaker 03

  This is beautiful gaslighting right here.

• 1:16:51Stavros Halkias?

  This is the guy, the guys, the guys making her feel bad about being the breadwinner. She, yeah, you're fucking, he has no say in anything. He's a piece of shit. He's clearly insecure that you're, that you have the better job, whatever. And he's gaslighting you into, he's acting out because it's like, there's some dumb bitch at work that'll never be better than him. You're better than him. You're clearly smarter and make more money. You know what I mean? Like, you've been better than him, honestly, since you were kids. That's the problem with. Look, I don't want to bring this up, but you know my stance on high school and college sweethearts even. It's just like, it's tough for that shit to work out. And I'm not saying it doesn't work out, but I am saying that this is textbook gaslighting.

• 1:17:35Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:17:35Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, this is fucking nuts. And like, you're, you're feeling guilty? You're calling in and feeling guilty is crazy. I mean, I, I don't, I mean, this is the kind of thing where it's like, yeah, you should feel insecure because I don't believe this fucking guy. And I don't even know what it would.

• 1:17:54Speaker 03

  He, she said she spoke to her too. I would like to know what that was like.

• 1:17:57Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, that's the like.

• 1:17:58Speaker 03

  She said, she said that the other girl said it was just flirting.

• 1:18:02Stavros Halkias?

  I know. That's really interesting.

• 1:18:04Speaker 03

  Did you reach out to her? Did you?

• 1:18:05Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, how did that happen? I mean, if he's like, if I was like, yeah, talk to her. And he's like, alright, they're fucking going over it like a mob lawyer.

• 1:18:13Speaker 03

  Yeah. Like, what are you gonna say?

• 1:18:14Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, exactly. They're going over her testimony the night before the fucking trial.

• 1:18:19Speaker 03

  This is tough.

• 1:18:20Stavros Halkias?

  This is really tough because you're not, you're clearly a nice person who's, who is gaslit to oblivion right now. Um, the fact that he's even making you feel bad about being the breadwinner is, that's, that in and of itself is a gigantic red flag. To be like, to start, everything's gone good and the arguments start because you make more money, because you provide for him and that starts an argument like, he can't say shit to you. I don't, I, like, that's red flag number one. Somebody who's with someone understands, it's not like this changed or anything like that. And even if it did. If it's your fucking life partner, you can't be insecure about shit like that.

• 1:19:01Speaker 03

  I mean, let's just call it what it is. I mean, you caught your husband texting his coworker, "Good morning, baby," at 8 a.m. on a Saturday. Like, he was having an affair.

• 1:19:08Stavros Halkias?

  He's.

• 1:19:08Speaker 03

  Whether he had sex with her or not, I mean, I guess that's debatable.

• 1:19:11Stavros Halkias?

  It's minimum an emotional affair at absolute minimum.

• 1:19:14Speaker 03

  So.

• 1:19:15Stavros Halkias?

  And he's, just because he wiped the hard drives doesn't mean there wasn't fucked up shit.

• 1:19:19Speaker 03

  Right. There's probably nudes there.

• 1:19:21Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, without qu- minimum, we're talking nudes.

• 1:19:23Speaker 03

  Yeah. So he was having an emotional affair at least, so you have to decide if you're willing to trust him again or put up with that. Cause that's, that's, that's the thing that happened. Like, you caught that.

• 1:19:32Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:32Speaker 03

  At the very minimum, and who knows what the more. But I think sometimes women should ask themselves, it's like, alright, let's say you did catch him sleeping with his coworker.

• 1:19:41Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 1:19:42Speaker 03

  Are you gonna leave him? Cause if you're not gonna leave him, then just let it go. Cause you're not gonna leave him regardless.

• 1:19:47Stavros Halkias?

  What are you gonna, how are you gonna replace that eight hundred dollars a month he brings in? You're not gonna, you're gonna have to either cut, you're gonna have to Disney Plus or fucking Hulu.

• 1:19:56Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:19:57Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I, I know he pays for all the streaming services, so.

• 1:20:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:00Stavros Halkias?

  You're gonna, you think about that, you know what I mean?

• 1:20:02Speaker 03

  Decide what you're gonna do. If you're not gonna leave him regardless, then this is, stop killing yourself over it.

• 1:20:08Stavros Halkias?

  I, I mean, if you're not gonna leave, first of all, if you want my harsh, true thoughts on this.

• 1:20:16Speaker 03

  Please.

• 1:20:18Stavros Halkias?

  High school sweethearts. It's gotta be perfect to continue a high school sweethearts relationship, in my opinion.

• 1:20:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:27Stavros Halkias?

  This is the only person you've ever dated. The second you hit a road bump, which, look, a- and as much as I was tough on the guy for like, saying it's a red flag to start arguments over, uh, uh, you know, the, eh, the, the imbalance in their, um, financial stuff, like, I get how that could, your knee jerk reaction to feeling insufficient to your wife, could start an argument, but you have to work through that and you have to, alright, we're, we're good. Clearly, the second this guy felt emasculated, he fucking, at the very minimum, looked for attention elsewhere. At the very minimum, at worst case scenario, had a. Full blown affair with somebody.

• 1:21:08Stavros Halkias?

  It's the first, that's the first problem you guys have had. He has a fucking affair of some, of some level. He doesn't provide, you don't even have the fucking cold rational. He's fucking rich, I'll turn a blind eye. You fucking buy him, he's wearing Dockers you fucking paid for. Uh, to me, uh, you can't let, I would not let it go. I would at minimum. Go to like counseling to feel like you're actually over this. Have him actually admit what happened. You can't have these weird half truths.

• 1:21:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, the half truths is no good.

• 1:21:40Stavros Halkias?

  You have to be like, you know what, I don't. You can't, it can't be a conversation between you, him and the girl he fucking cheated with. It's gotta be you, him and a fucking therapist. You, and look, I'm not even saying. Throw it away, right? That's definitely my inclination. I'm that kind of person. Uh, that's my own issue. I fucked up relationships, so I don't wanna work on them.

• 1:21:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:22:00Stavros Halkias?

  I'm not even, even if he cheated, I'm not even necessarily saying throw it away because. The older I get, the more I realize, sometimes people just fucking act out. You both are immature. You both are high school sweethearts. He doesn't know. He's never dealt with any of this shit. It could have, even if he had an affair, it could have been a mistake. That he won't repeat. But it also could be, it could be something you can't get over. And either one of those is fine. That's your decision to make. But to sort of, you're treating this a little flippantly because this guy has gaslit the fuck out of you. And so you have to treat this with actual, it's a serious thing that could very well. Uh, sink your relationship and I think you need to treat it with that kind of severity.

• 1:22:40Stavros Halkias?

  From my, that's the way I'd look at it. That's just be, given all, given the context of their relationship.

• 1:22:46Speaker 03

  Is this the same, uh, caller who said that she didn't have like men in her life?

• 1:22:50Stavros Halkias?

  Yes.

• 1:22:50Speaker 03

  Could talk to, well, that makes sense. That's why she's being so easily manipulated.

• 1:22:54Stavros Halkias?

  Absolutely. This is like, this guy's probably so stupid.

• 1:22:57Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:22:57Stavros Halkias?

  And because she doesn't have any.

• 1:22:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, cause any man would be like, are you kidding me?

• 1:23:00Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:01Speaker 03

  This is insane. This is like.

• 1:23:02Stavros Halkias?

  All of this is crazy.

• 1:23:03Speaker 03

  Yeah, uh, but that makes sense. But yeah, I, I, I agree. I think you gotta, you gotta at least go to therapy on this.

• 1:23:08Stavros Halkias?

  Minimum.

• 1:23:09Speaker 03

  Cause you always gonna have that. And what's the not wearing your wedding ring to work? What is that?

• 1:23:13Stavros Halkias?

  What are we talking about?

• 1:23:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, what, what is that?

• 1:23:15Stavros Halkias?

  Everything you've said is fucking crazy. I hate to be this guy.

• 1:23:18Speaker 04

  Hey, I've been known to forget mine when I come to work here sometimes.

• 1:23:21Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, this is trying to fuck me. Oh, this is trying to fuck his coworkers.

• 1:23:26Speaker 03

  But she's like, he was doing it purposely, like.

• 1:23:29Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I mean, this, I, I, I feel so bad for her because I, I'd love to be able to talk to her actually, but yeah, this is, um, this is tough, this guy, and you can't be taking any shit from this fucking guy, and I mean, that's the other thing, it's like, the fact that he's trying to weirdly come, I don't know, kind of on, like, she feels bad, you hear it in her voice.

• 1:23:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:51Stavros Halkias?

  You shouldn't feel bad at all.

• 1:23:53Speaker 03

  I mean, you should feel bad that your husband's kind of a piece of shit.

• 1:23:56Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, you should feel sad, but you don't, you shouldn't feel guilty.

• 1:23:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, not guilty.

• 1:24:00Stavros Halkias?

  The guilt should all, she feels guilty, she's like, I don't want to be insecure, you're not being insecure, you're reacting like a fucking human being would to, and, to this situation.

• 1:24:08Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:24:08Stavros Halkias?

  And if this, and, and I will say, if this was fucking, if this was me, there's, I'm not having a calm conversation with the guy who texted my fucking wife, good morning, baby. I'm not gonna get his side of the story, like, that's, that's crazy, you know what I mean?

• 1:24:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, good morning, baby is crazy.

• 1:24:26Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, it's insane, what are we talking about? It's your fucking husband! Oh, man, so anyway.

• 1:24:34Speaker 03

  If I call, if I call a girlfriend texting a guy, good morning, baby, on Saturday, 8 a.m., I think that's it.

• 1:24:40Stavros Halkias?

  That's probably it, yeah, for sure.

• 1:24:41Speaker 03

  I think we're done.

• 1:24:42Stavros Halkias?

  It's like, who the fuck is this guy?

• 1:24:44Speaker 04

  Why would you ever text that to a fucking coworker?

• 1:24:47Speaker 03

  Cause you're fucking him.

• 1:24:48Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:24:49Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, there's no other cop, with the fucking shit wiped and the message is silenced?

• 1:24:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, like.

• 1:24:58Stavros Halkias?

  You get a divorce lawyer, immediately, honestly.

• 1:25:02Speaker 03

  Or, or, you go to counseling.

• 1:25:04Stavros Halkias?

  Go to counseling.

• 1:25:05Speaker 03

  And, and work through it, if that's the route.

• 1:25:07Stavros Halkias?

  But yes, those are the two options.

• 1:25:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:25:10Stavros Halkias?

  The third, like, take his word for it and have a conversation with the girl, you're, you're a nice person that, that has gotten manipulated, this is fucking nuts. But we're rooting for you.

• 1:25:21Speaker 03

  If you got a little money, hire a private investigator.

• 1:25:23Stavros Halkias?

  You're so fucking right. Hire a private investigator.

• 1:25:26Speaker 03

  Let's bring it to the bottom of it.

• 1:25:28Stavros Halkias?

  We'll match.

• 1:25:29Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:25:29Stavros Halkias?

  I'm not even kidding.

• 1:25:30Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:25:31Stavros Halkias?

  Contact Elvis, we will match you up to, I don't know, a thousand dollars.

• 1:25:36Speaker 03

  Where's the, where's the, can we look up the zip code to see?

• 1:25:38Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, let's see where she's at.

• 1:25:39Speaker 03

  Where is it? Area code?

• 1:25:44Speaker 03

  Oh, that's easy.

• 1:25:45Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:25:45Speaker 03

  That's easy. I was just there. I was there last weekend.

• 1:25:47Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:25:48Speaker 03

  I could have done some research.

• 1:25:48Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:25:49Speaker 04

  We should catch a flight and do a cheaters style episode of Stavi's World.

• 1:25:54Stavros Halkias?

  Holy shit, Eldis.

• 1:25:55Speaker 03

  That's hilarious.

• 1:25:56Stavros Halkias?

  You're a fucking genius. We need to fucking do cheaters, Stavi's World, cheaters edition. Where I, we confront them.

• 1:26:05Speaker 03

  It'd be hilarious if her husband is also a listener. And he sends us a message like, "Hey, Stavi, love you. Longtime listener." So I'm cheating on my wife and this bitch.

• 1:26:13Stavros Halkias?

  So I'm cheating on my wife, but he's looking at my Apple Watch. I think this whore's gotten wise.

• 1:26:19Stavros Halkias?

  My buddy, hang in there.

• 1:26:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, you're giving him both advice. Hang in there. She's probably gonna hire a private investigator, but listen.

• 1:26:27Stavros Halkias?

  Um, hi, yeah, for real, like, you were being gaslit here. We've spent enough time. You get it. You get where we're coming from. But we're rooting for you, and we literally will help if you need us to.

• 1:26:38Speaker 03

  That's hilarious. You're a good guy, man.

• 1:26:40Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I mean, we, we, we love our listeners here at Stavi's World. What do we got, Eldis? Let's do a couple.

• 1:26:46Speaker 00

  Time for a quick break to talk about McDonald's. It's the tangiest time of the year. For a limited time, head to McDonald's and get a McRib sandwich. Make it a meal by adding a medium fries and a soft drink like an ice cold Diet Dr. Pepper. So grab a McRib sandwich and embrace the tang. Save time by ordering ahead on the app. At participating McDonald's for a limited time. Dr. Pepper is a registered trademark of Dr. Pepper, 7-Up Inc.

• 1:27:10Speaker 01

  Cool fall nights always make me want to entertain more. A few friends around the table, maybe a fire outside. I stop at Total Wine & More because there's a cranberry flavored wine, a crisp apple wine, a pumpkin spice cream that's perfect in coffee after dinner. With the lowest prices, I can bring home a few different fall flavors for everyone to try. Find your favorite fall flavors at the lowest prices at Total Wine & More. Spirits are not sold in Virginia and North Carolina. Drink responsibly. B21.

• 1:27:39Stavros Halkias?

  More.

• 1:27:40Speaker 06

  Hey, Stavi. Hey, Eldis.

• 1:27:45Speaker 06

  Uh, hello guest, um. Yeah, so. I'm taking too long, I apologize. Basically, my eldest sister, she's got this boyfriend. Who sucks, uh, he's just like, you know, has been caught sneaking into people's, uh, family, uh. Liquor cabinets, just drinking, just throwing them back.

• 1:28:06Stavros Halkias?

  A grown man? Not a child?

• 1:28:08Speaker 06

  But he sucks, okay. He sucks, uh. And, uh, he just told, she's, they're planning on getting married.

• 1:28:15Stavros Halkias?

  Ooh.

• 1:28:16Speaker 06

  I hate this guy. Um. My dad passed away about a year ago, we're gonna go celebrate his life, just the four of us. Me, my other sister, my mom. And her, uh, she really wants him to come. We're kinda like, no, we're not bringing any of our partners, I have a really sick. Super sexy Latina girlfriend who's awesome, but she's not coming because we just want the four of us. Uh, she's flipping out about it, uh, they're planning on getting married now, which sucks. Basically, should I tell her? I fucking hate this guy. You know, they can get married, that's fine, but part of me is like, I, she should just know, I really don't fucking like him. Also, no one likes him in our family, like cousins and everything, and uncle. Uh, thank you so much, you have a, have a great fucking day.

• 1:29:01Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, this is a brutal situation, man.

• 1:29:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:29:04Stavros Halkias?

  To hate a potential in-law of your sibling is really tough.

• 1:29:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:29:09Stavros Halkias?

  Um, you gotta tread lightly, though. I fully get where he's coming from, I get the feel where he's, you know, his feelings here. But. Overplaying your hand could lead to them having the leg up here and some sympathy. Like, if you're like, he's a fucking p- fuck. If you, without them really deserving it, now. She is being, she's the asshole here for saying, trying to get. Anyone to this thing, where you said, it's our, we're trying to celebrate our dad's, you know, life. Just immediate family, no one's bringing partners, and her insisting?

• 1:29:49Stavros Halkias?

  That's a pretty nice opening, actually. That's a pretty nice opening to be, to air out your true feelings. Cause you have the cover of, of how selfish it is. And also that it is your dad's funeral, essentially. Pops can do you one more solid from beyond the grave and provide you coverage to shit on this piece of shit boyfriend, right? Where you're like, honestly, first of all, you could be like, it's disrespectful for you to want, to want special treatment compared to the rest of us. That's number one. And two, since you're pressing the matter, your boyfriend's a fucking asshole who I don't want honoring my father's memory for this, this and this and this reason. That's how I would handle it in terms of like, family politics. You know what I mean? Like,

• 1:30:32Stavros Halkias?

  um, and her insisting is weird. Now, look, the other thing you have to realize, you're not winning this. People with horrible partners love their stupid fucking partners. For some stupid psychological reason, they have their hooks in them. And honestly, the more you fucking hate them, the more it might actually backfire on you. But at the same time, you're a human being and you have to go through life speaking your truth, brother. And I wouldn't swallow my fucking tongue if this guy was that big of a piece of shit personally. Um.

• 1:31:05Speaker 03

  I think this is very tricky, man. As one, as the youngest of five, I don't see.

• 1:31:09Stavros Halkias?

  You give, you, you have much more.

• 1:31:11Speaker 03

  I don't see a winning scenario here. There's no winning scenario. I think, I think you may just have to resort to talking shit behind his back with your other family members. Seriously, like I don't, there's no, like, you're not gonna, don't, you're gonna tell her, I don't like this guy. What? She's gonna not marry him? No, like, she's not even gonna take it into account. As soon as you say that to her, from what it sounds like, you're gonna become her enemy.

• 1:31:32Stavros Halkias?

  Sure.

• 1:31:33Speaker 03

  So it's like, what, what is it to you? Like, it, there's no positive coming from that. Only your own ego being like, well, I told her that I didn't like him, but it's like, nothing is, she's not gonna leave him. She's not gonna look at him differently. She's gonna look at you differently. So there's, there's really no win for you here.

• 1:31:48Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I think you're right. There's only what, what negative is more palatable to you. And the options are, you're right, saying it for yourself and potentially losing your sister in a real way. Or biting your tongue, living in.

• 1:32:03Stavros Halkias?

  In like this weird quasi, you know, ignoring ha- having an elephant in the room for the rest of your life. Now to me, to me personally, because of how I grew up and because so much of my life was pretending shit was okay that wasn't. I don't think I could handle that as an adult.

• 1:32:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:32:19Stavros Halkias?

  I think I would, and listen, I'm not even saying I wouldn't invite him to my fucking house if he behaved fine, but I don't think.

• 1:32:24Speaker 03

  He's gonna steal out your liquor cabinet.

• 1:32:25Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, but that's what I'm saying is like, it's almost like you can't, just because you're pretty sure a guy's gonna commit a crime. You can't arrest him until he's committed the crime. So it's like.

• 1:32:36Speaker 03

  I mean, I'm black, I understand.

• 1:32:38Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If only we could police the way we knew, no, things would be simpler. You know, but like, but basically.

• 1:32:45Speaker 03

  No stopping frisk, I get it.

• 1:32:47Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. You can't have Giuliani style tactics on this guy, even though he fits the profile. You have to wait until he comes out of a fucking H and M with his fucking backpack stuffed full of V-necks to sell it. Home room the next day.

• 1:33:02Speaker 03

  Yeah. I just think I'm, I think as like somebody's brother, you don't have, I mean, it's not your, you liking him is pointless. It's, it's, it doesn't matter. It's inconsequential. It means nothing. Whether you like him or not, it means nothing. Your only role is to wish best for her, your sister. Now, if she comes to you and confides in you and you're having, and she gives you the window of saying your opinion.

• 1:33:23Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:24Speaker 03

  Like, you know, maybe she's having issues and she comes to you and she's like, and then it gives you the window to say your opinion, that's a role. But to just listen, sit down and volunteer your opinion on your partner's, on your, on your sister or brother's partner, I don't think there's a role where you come out as a good guy here.

• 1:33:37Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, you're right. And in fact, that, that makes me sort of even retract my original advice where I've said the funeral gives, or the celebration of life gives him cover. You have to stick with the rules here and the rules are just no partners. And it just, it's immaterial that this guy's a piece of shit.

• 1:33:56Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:33:56Stavros Halkias?

  And I think you're right, Ian. It's like, you have to just accept this and it, and like I said, if a window comes up, yes, you're absolutely right. You can say it. No one's gonna stop you. But you also have to, you also have to understand it, even when the window comes up, it doesn't matter.

• 1:34:11Speaker 03

  It still doesn't matter.

• 1:34:11Stavros Halkias?

  You could fucking say it and then. She'll be sad and crying for a week and then they get back. How many times does that happen?

• 1:34:16Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:34:16Stavros Halkias?

  Where a friend breaks up with somebody and you're like.

• 1:34:18Speaker 03

  Every time.

• 1:34:18Stavros Halkias?

  Finally.

• 1:34:19Speaker 03

  It happens every single time.

• 1:34:20Stavros Halkias?

  You say everything that you've fucking bitten your tongue about and they get back together a month fucking later.

• 1:34:25Speaker 03

  Every single time.

• 1:34:26Stavros Halkias?

  So even when you get the window, you have to be careful.

• 1:34:30Speaker 03

  Also, I think the desire to wanting to let somebody know that you don't like their partner, when you know nothing is gonna come from it, that's a little bit selfish.

• 1:34:36Stavros Halkias?

  Selfish, you're right.

• 1:34:36Speaker 03

  It's a little bit like trying to feed your own ego of like, I was right and I wanna be ahead of it before I was right. Cause you know for a fact, he knows she's not gonna leave him.

• 1:34:44Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 1:34:44Speaker 03

  If that were, if that were part of the conversation, I would say, yeah, then maybe there is space to have it, but you know she's not.

• 1:34:49Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 1:34:49Speaker 03

  You're just gonna become enemies.

• 1:34:50Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right, right.

• 1:34:51Speaker 03

  So.

• 1:34:52Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, and so just, you know.

• 1:34:54Speaker 03

  But shout out to the hot Latina girlfriend.

• 1:34:56Stavros Halkias?

  Shout out to her, man. Respect.

• 1:34:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, she sounds great.

• 1:34:59Stavros Halkias?

  She sounds awesome. I'd love one of those myself.

• 1:35:01Speaker 03

  I feel like you should focus on that and forget about your sister and her alcoholic.

• 1:35:05Stavros Halkias?

  Fuck you. Oh, you have to see this drunk every fucking Thanksgiving.

• 1:35:09Speaker 03

  Look at your hot girlfriend.

• 1:35:10Stavros Halkias?

  Who gives a fuck, dude? Come on, go get, have some fucking fresh.

• 1:35:14Speaker 03

  I have a really sick, super sick, hot Latina girlfriend. Those are his words. That's a fucking, you're living the dream.

• 1:35:20Stavros Halkias?

  You can also tell this, this frustration is coming out of his sister insisting he comes to the dad's funeral.

• 1:35:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:35:28Stavros Halkias?

  There's a little bit of that. You also have to recognize when your sister's just, you gotta let that shit go. And, and my worry here would be that his sister might just be an enemy anyway, you know what I mean? If she continues to advocate for a guy who's being a fucking asshole.

• 1:35:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:35:46Stavros Halkias?

  And she just kinda becomes his teammate, that, that is an unfortunate thing that happens.

• 1:35:51Speaker 03

  I mean, they're teammates. That's what it is. That's what it is. Yeah. But I will say this, maybe this is a conversation you could have, but somebody who has lost a parent, I think it's something to bring up is like, with her, it's like, unless it's a husband or a wife, you don't wanna make a boyfriend or somebody like that part of something like this, cause this lives on with you forever.

• 1:36:09Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 1:36:09Speaker 03

  And you don't want this person, once you've moved on and you're now married with like a new husband or whatever, you don't want this person to be inscribed into that memory of like.

• 1:36:18Stavros Halkias?

  Totally. Well, no, he doesn't want this guy here either way.

• 1:36:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, I'm saying. She wouldn't want that.

• 1:36:23Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right, right.

• 1:36:24Speaker 03

  She wouldn't want that in the future. It's like you don't want to look back at your dad's celebration of life and see some asshole who was an alcoholic.

• 1:36:30Speaker 04

  You don't want the guy in the back in the selfie taking the woods.

• 1:36:34Speaker 03

  Taking a little shot that he brought from a flask.

• 1:36:36Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, that's what I'm, I think that's what this comes from. And I think ultimately, dude, put your foot down. Don't let this motherfucker come to this thing. And whatever you have to do to do that, I think even if you have to, you know, yell at your sister, whatever. But you gotta tread lightly here, my friend. Um, why don't you fucking cap us off with something good, Eldis?

• 1:36:56Speaker 03

  How many of these do you get, man? These are crazy.

• 1:36:58Stavros Halkias?

  We get a lot.

• 1:36:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:37:00Stavros Halkias?

  We, we get a ton.

• 1:37:04Speaker 06

  Hey, Stav. Hey, Eldis. Uh, I have a question. Oh, hello, guest.

• 1:37:10Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 1:37:10Speaker 06

  I have a question about my relationship with my girlfriend right now. Uh, so for background, I'm 23. She's 21. We've been dating for like a year-ish. Uh, and it's going great. It's really wonderful. I love her. She loves me. She's beautiful. It's, everything's great. She's super creative and talented, et cetera, et cetera, all the boring shit. Uh, but really recently, we've had a bit of an issue because she bleached her eyebrows blonde. And

• 1:37:45Stavros Halkias?

  hilarious.

• 1:37:46Speaker 06

  She was like talking to me about wanting to do this for like a week, maybe two weeks. And as she was talking to me, I, I was very honest with her and I was like, look, I don't think it's gonna look very good, but if you want to do it, I support you in doing it. And eventually she did it and then she FaceTimed me at the time. And I, I was like, it looked better than I thought it would. And that wasn't a happy enough response for her.

• 1:38:13Speaker 04

  Fucking idiot. This guy's awesome.

• 1:38:15Speaker 06

  She, she keeps re-bleaching her eyebrows and every time I see her, I, I'm like, damn, she's so pretty, but I wish she had a normal eyebrows again. What do I do?

• 1:38:26Stavros Halkias?

  What do you do?

• 1:38:28Speaker 06

  Am I, like, should I say that?

• 1:38:30Stavros Halkias?

  No!

• 1:38:31Speaker 06

  I feel like that's not the way to say it, obviously. So if I should say something, you gotta tell me what to do. Help me out here, Stav.

• 1:38:36Stavros Halkias?

  I gotta help you out? What are you fucking, oh, hey, how do I control my girlfriend's appearance against her will? You don't, dickhead. You're a fucking dumb little idiot. This is what happens when you're 21, she's 22. You're not gonna be able to tell her to fucking, you can't tell your girl-

• 1:38:52Speaker 03

  She's 23, she's 21. Yeah, he's 23.

• 1:38:54Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, yeah, dude, you're not-

• 1:38:56Speaker 03

  Yeah. Also, like, eyebrow, come on, like, that's a, that'll be done soon. You don't gotta see that. Let her ride it out. No one's gonna keep bleaching their eyebrows.

• 1:39:03Stavros Halkias?

  What are you fucking talking about? You fucking loser. This, and by the way, the fact that, the type of person in a relationship who nips a girl's appearance that he doesn't like in the bud is not a nervous podcast listener voicemail lever. If you were gonna control her appearance, you would've done it already. There's nothing in the world I can say-

• 1:39:25Speaker 03

  To teach you how to be a man.

• 1:39:26Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And by the way, I'm not even advocating for that. I wouldn't tell my girl to fucking, like, you know, to change her appearance if I didn't like something. I'd let her fucking ride it out. I don't give a fuck. But it's like, yeah, you're, you clearly like, this is, you don't get to say, here's what you could do. Uh, you know, you do something stupid to your face. And that would, that would backfire. She would just leave you and fuck somebody else. She's a hot girl that does, that does dumb shit to her eyebrows and still is hot.

• 1:39:53Speaker 03

  She sounds hot, yeah.

• 1:39:54Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah. She sounds cool. She sounds way cooler than you. So, yeah, dude, this is, this is what, this is part of the, this is part of what goes, the hot, dating a hot girl package is you just gotta, they do whatever they want with their fucking appearance.

• 1:40:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:40:09Stavros Halkias?

  And you're along for the ride.

• 1:40:10Speaker 03

  I mean, this is not gonna happen if you're dating a 29-year-old.

• 1:40:13Stavros Halkias?

  Sure.

• 1:40:13Speaker 03

  They're probably not gonna bleach their eyebrows blonde.

• 1:40:15Stavros Halkias?

  Sure.

• 1:40:16Speaker 03

  But if you, if you, if you're gonna take the, the joys of, of 21-year-old Vaj, you have to take with the backlash that come from it, which is sometimes they wake up and they wanna bleach their face.

• 1:40:27Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, something odd happens, bro.

• 1:40:29Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:40:29Stavros Halkias?

  Who gives a fuck?

• 1:40:30Speaker 03

  That's what it is.

• 1:40:31Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah. This is so funny. He, he hates this and he's such a coward. He can't even admit it to us. He's like, you, you gotta tell me what to do, Stav. You're not, there's nothing to do, buddy.

• 1:40:41Speaker 03

  Enjoy, man.

• 1:40:42Stavros Halkias?

  Enjoy, have a good time, don't be a fucking dickhead.

• 1:40:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, you'll break up.

• 1:40:44Stavros Halkias?

  And learn how to lie to women when you know the right answer on insignificant shit. Pretend it looked awesome.

• 1:40:52Speaker 03

  She'll probably, if you tell, if you, if you tell her it looked awesome, she'll probably stop. She'll probably stop doing it. Like, it, it'll probably, it'll probably be like, alright, well, that's fine.

• 1:41:01Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:41:02Speaker 03

  She'll probably be like, I'm going blue now.

• 1:41:03Stavros Halkias?

  That is actually true. You 100% bought yourself minimum two extra weeks of bleached eyebrows. By being like, by harumphing that shit.

• 1:41:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:41:14Stavros Halkias?

  Uh, yeah, dude, you're a fucking idiot. You're, you're 23, this is dumb, young, young guy problems. It's, it's literally cute. This is like seeing a, this is like when you see a video of a baby trying to like, eat, uh, toast for the first time, or avocado, and it's just got avocado toast, it's just got green all over its nose. This is you trying to be, and it's so funny to look at 23-year-old problems and be like, aww.

• 1:41:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:41:38Stavros Halkias?

  Aww, he thinks if he tells her to bleach her eyebrows back, that will help him. He thinks that won't be the worst mistake he's ever made in his life. Uh, well, good for you, buddy, you're cute. Thank you to everybody who called in, uh, thank you, Ian.

• 1:41:55Stavros Halkias?

  Great episode, buddy, we really appreciate you coming by, and we will talk to you guys next time, bye-bye.

• 1:42:00Speaker 03

  Thank you, man, thank you for having me.

• 1:42:02Stavros Halkias?

  Of course.

• 1:42:17Speaker 00

  Time for a quick break to talk about McDonald's. It's the tangiest time of the year. For a limited time, head to McDonald's and get a McRib sandwich. Make it a meal by adding a medium fries and a soft drink like an ice cold Diet Dr. Pepper. So grab a McRib sandwich and embrace the tang. Save time by ordering ahead on the app. At participating McDonald's for a limited time. Dr. Pepper is a registered trademark of Dr. Pepper, 7-Up Inc. Hi, it's me, your gutters. Everything is totally fine. There's just a lot of debris up here, and I've been managing it mostly on my own. I just thought you could find someone on Angie to clean me up. I could really use it. Your gutters have waited long enough. Find a pro at Angie.com.