"Aubrey Plaza"

Time for spaghetti and donuts; it’s Aubrey Plaza. Dancing, beams of sunshine, gum advocacy, and D. All Of The Above. We’re just [metaphorically] singing in the shower in the iso-booth but pretending not to be looking at ourselves in the mirror… on an all-new SmartLess.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Sean Hayes?

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• 0:44Sean Hayes?

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• 0:54Jason Bateman?

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• 1:34Sean Hayes?

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• 2:10Sean Hayes?

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• 2:55Will Arnett?

  Hey, Shawnee, I was just thinking about, um, I'm just going, I'm getting really reminiscent of the old days. Yeah, tell me about it. Well, I was just thinking about, back in the day, you used to be able to get 10 bucks out of a manufacturer Hanover ATM. So I was so broke and I'd take 10 bucks out and then I could buy a pack of smokes and I'd go to Hot and Crusty and I could get a coffee and a Danish and for 25 cents I could buy the New York Post. And then I'd go to the 87th Street entrance to the 86th Street Station on the Upper West Side and I'd wait for the subway doors to open. And then at the last second, I'd run and I'd hop the turnstile. Before they had the big thing, it was just a little turnstile, shit. And I'd hop it so that I'd time it so I'd run in and beat the fare to get on the subway in case there was a transit cop there. You know what I mean?

• 3:40Will Arnett?

  Then I could... Yeah, welcome to Smartless. Welcome to Smartless.

• 4:03Will Arnett?

  I'm gonna keep the gum very low. I'm just, I've turned it down to one.

• 4:07Jason Bateman?

  Oh.

• 4:07Sean Hayes?

  Oh, is this, is this, is this a suppressant gum type of nicotine thing?

• 4:11Jason Bateman?

  Medicinal gum.

• 4:12Will Arnett?

  I, I just have, I have a lot going on.

• 4:15Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, I get it. And he needs it today, Sean.

• 4:17Will Arnett?

  Okay.

• 4:18Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 4:19Jason Bateman?

  He needs it today. Go easy.

• 4:20Will Arnett?

  You know what I mean?

• 4:21Jason Bateman?

  Don't they have like, they've got sprays now. Can't you just like spray your, spray your mouth?

• 4:26Will Arnett?

  Do they really?

• 4:27Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, they've got like a nicotine spray.

• 4:29Sean Hayes?

  What do you mean? You just do a spray? And it stays?

• 4:32Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, like Benaka. Remember Benaka? Where Benaka go?

• 4:34Will Arnett?

  Oh, yeah, Benaka.

• 4:35Sean Hayes?

  Benaka's still happening, I think.

• 4:37Jason Bateman?

  Is it really?

• 4:38Sean Hayes?

  You know what makes your breath worse? Oh, I can't say. Can we say the name? Those little tabs, those, those mouthwash tabs.

• 4:44Jason Bateman?

  No, no, no, they do not.

• 4:45Will Arnett?

  You mean, you mean, you mean the little sheets?

• 4:47Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, little tongue rubs.

• 4:48Sean Hayes?

  They make my breath worse.

• 4:50Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 4:50Jason Bateman?

  Really? Who said?

• 4:52Sean Hayes?

  You, your mom.

• 4:53Jason Bateman?

  No, cuz I, I, I use those constantly. The little tongue rub.

• 4:57Sean Hayes?

  No, I know. No, but for me, I don't know what they do. They make my breath worse.

• 5:01Will Arnett?

  I, well, obviously we know that your breath is much more about your gut. But you know, the thing that JB, it's about your gut.

• 5:07Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it might be all the ground beef you have for breakfast.

• 5:09Will Arnett?

  Yeah, it could be, yeah. When you have spaghetti bolognese and a, and a doughnut on the same plate, you're kind of headed to a road, down the road of disaster. But here's the thing I know about JB that he hates more than just, just bad breath. He hates a heavy breath.

• 5:24Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, that is true.

• 5:25Will Arnett?

  Right, JB?

• 5:26Jason Bateman?

  Something hot, warm and, and, you know, they're just like a-

• 5:31Will Arnett?

  You know what he said to me?

• 5:32Jason Bateman?

  Like a blanket.

• 5:33Will Arnett?

  We were on the golf court, we were, we were somewhere and we were in like a golf cart together and he goes, he turns me with the look of utter, just-

• 5:41Jason Bateman?

  Heavy lid.

• 5:42Will Arnett?

  Disgust on his face. And he goes, and he goes, "I can smell your laundry detergent."

• 5:52Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, but that smells good.

• 5:54Jason Bateman?

  It does.

• 5:54Will Arnett?

  But it was such a funny thing. It was such a funny thing to say.

• 5:57Jason Bateman?

  I must have been feeling a little extra grouchy that day.

• 6:01Will Arnett?

  I know.

• 6:02Jason Bateman?

  Why am I naturally grouchy? What's wrong with me?

• 6:05Will Arnett?

  You're not though.

• 6:07Jason Bateman?

  I'm not naturally grouchy. I'm just not unnecessarily chipper.

• 6:11Sean Hayes?

  Giddy, yeah.

• 6:13Jason Bateman?

  I mean, do you guys like people that just come in? They're just like, and you can tell they're not really in that good of a mood. It's almost like keeping you at arm's length by how happy they are. Hey, hey, how's it going? Oh, good to see you. It's like, no, I want to bring you in with, I'm not full of shit over here. I'm, I'm.

• 6:32Sean Hayes?

  That's so funny.

• 6:33Jason Bateman?

  Hi, how are you?

• 6:34Sean Hayes?

  One of the, one of the, one of the many, many presidents of NBC, Will and Grace is on the air. Have you guys heard of that show?

• 6:40Jason Bateman?

  Yes, yes, yes. Wait, Will.

• 6:43Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 6:43Jason Bateman?

  That's one I said that I want to try to see one of these days.

• 6:46Will Arnett?

  Still not ringing a bell. I'm so sorry. It's still nothing.

• 6:49Sean Hayes?

  Wait, so one of the, one of the presidents came in, you know, one day and was like, something wrong with Sean? To somebody and they're like, no, he's fine. Like what, what's wrong? Well, he just wasn't, just wasn't chipper.

• 7:01Jason Bateman?

  Oh, boy.

• 7:01Sean Hayes?

  And so it's like, you know, to your point, it's like you can't, some days you just don't want to, you just want to like talk like a person.

• 7:08Jason Bateman?

  Do you not want real today?

• 7:10Will Arnett?

  I know, and that's the thing. Yeah, I think that for the most part, we're pretty real with each other. We're pretty honest about where we're at.

• 7:18Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 7:19Will Arnett?

  Right?

• 7:19Jason Bateman?

  But I won't, but, but I guess the difference is that you, you, you don't, you hope people sort of like, they won't drag their stuff into your, your, your meeting, your, your time together. Like I'm, I'm accountable for my own, my own stuff. I'll put it in a little, in a little drawer. I'm not going to drag my bad mood around.

• 7:40Will Arnett?

  But sometimes we, sometimes we record a lot. We, we make one of these a week. And sometimes life happens and you end up getting on and we start recording and you're in, you are where you are and there's no. I've, I had, God, I had somebody, I had a thing that came up on you. Have you ever gone on that thing on threads? It's part of, it's kind of like, it's almost like, you know what it is, right? It's Instagram's Twitter, basically, in a way.

• 8:04Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 8:05Will Arnett?

  Meta. And something, somebody put my name in and they were talking about the show and they were like, "Ah, I hate hearing him tell his sto-" I didn't even, I was not looking for it like, You know what Jay's gonna say? I was like, "No, I didn't even," and it came up and I wanted to be like, "Thanks a lot." And then it was just like a litany of like, "Yeah, I don't really like that guy." You know what? They're talking about you? Yeah, and they're like, "And I hate hearing his stories. I don't even listen to him. I hate that guy." And you couldn't stop reading? And by the way, you can't, how can you? And literally came up in my thing and so much of it was so, unbelievably mean spirited in this way that I was like, "Whoa, I don't know you." But we talk about this, it's not about you. I'm like, "Wait a second, what did I do?"

• 8:50Will Arnett?

  Yeah, but that's not about you, that's about them.

• 8:52Jason Bateman?

  Didn't you want to chime in, Willie?

• 8:55Will Arnett?

  I did. This gal said something like, "He seems like, like, what did he say? He looks like, he looks like, uh, he looks like a perpetual ex-husband or ex-husband," or something like that. I was like, "Hey, fucking, I'm doing my best over here. Thanks a lot." He looks like an ex. You know what I mean? And it was so like, it was so weird. And then the mean spirited comments after were so rude. I was like, I kinda wanted to go like, "Hey, I'm a human, I can hear this."

• 9:24Jason Bateman?

  Did you want to just like drop your phone number and say, "You know what? Just call me."

• 9:27Will Arnett?

  Just call me.

• 9:28Jason Bateman?

  And let's talk this through.

• 9:29Will Arnett?

  Wouldn't that be kind of fun? What did I do? It would be kind of fun. Why don't we bring somebody on that hates us once a week? Listen, you'd have, evidently I have no, there's no shortage of people who would love to chime in about. It books itself a waiting list. And by the way, what they think I am, which is amazing. Anyway.

• 9:49Jason Bateman?

  Well, I'm here to say you two are two beams of sunshine. And you know what a third beam of sunshine is?

• 9:55Will Arnett?

  Uh-oh.

• 9:56Jason Bateman?

  Guys.

• 9:57Will Arnett?

  Yeah. Uh-oh.

• 10:00Jason Bateman?

  Today, we've got a guest who's a real kick. Okay, this gal pal of ours is about as funny as they come. She's as dry as burnt toast. Time named her one of the 100 most influential people in the world. She's been nominated for heaps of awards. She's won plenty of them as well. She's a producer and an actor. Most important, she's one of our friends. You guys, please welcome Miss Aubrey Plaza. Get it out here.

• 10:28Will Arnett?

  Aubrey Plaza.

• 10:33Will Arnett?

  Aubrey.

• 10:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, I hate you all. I hate you all.

• 10:37Jason Bateman?

  Will, do you remember when she was your girlfriend? And she was also my daughter at the same time?

• 10:42Will Arnett?

  Yes.

• 10:42Jason Bateman?

  What?

• 10:43Speaker 03

  See, I thought you were both playing pedophiles in that. Am I remembering wrong?

• 10:48Jason Bateman?

  Wait, what are you talking about?

• 10:49Will Arnett?

  Oh, you're the one who's been commenting online about me.

• 10:54Jason Bateman?

  We did a, we did a digital short for, what was it? Oh, that, that, I saw that. Orbitz.

• 11:00Will Arnett?

  No, Orbit, no, Orbit Gum. Orbitz was a travel site.

• 11:05Speaker 03

  Are you serious?

• 11:06Jason Bateman?

  Orbit Gum, yes, thank you.

• 11:09Speaker 03

  That was a commercial?

• 11:10Jason Bateman?

  It was, yeah, it was like a, like a, yeah. A digital ad. You were not compensated fairly?

• 11:17Speaker 03

  I honestly, the only thing I remembered was I thought you were both pedophiles and one of you was my dad.

• 11:22Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 11:23Speaker 03

  That's all I remember.

• 11:24Jason Bateman?

  I was the dad in the pedophile glasses. And then Will showed up. Will showed up as the, as the too old to be dating my daughter guy.

• 11:33Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 11:33Jason Bateman?

  And, um.

• 11:34Speaker 03

  Oh, right, we were dating.

• 11:36Jason Bateman?

  It was really funny.

• 11:36Speaker 03

  And I was in like a slightly dressed.

• 11:37Jason Bateman?

  And then what role did the gum play? The gum, the gum, I put in a stick of gum and then all of a sudden you seemed like a good choice for my daughter, right? Wasn't that kind of the bit?

• 11:47Will Arnett?

  I don't, I don't remember, I don't remember.

• 11:49Speaker 03

  Was that on television?

• 11:49Will Arnett?

  I don't remember the script.

• 11:51Jason Bateman?

  It was on, it was on the computer.

• 11:52Will Arnett?

  It was on the computer as a digital.

• 11:54Jason Bateman?

  You were fantastic, Aubrey.

• 11:55Speaker 03

  Why did that happen? I don't remember anything.

• 11:59Will Arnett?

  Well, I remember you came to us with the idea. You were like, how can we get gum going again? I think is what you said.

• 12:04Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, that sounds like me.

• 12:05Jason Bateman?

  Gum's been ignored.

• 12:06Will Arnett?

  You've always been a big advocate for gum.

• 12:08Jason Bateman?

  I've got a friend that doesn't chew gum because he doesn't understand why you chew something and not swallow it. Like, he just literally doesn't understand the concept of it. Does that, does that kind of like, if you think about it, kind of makes sense? I feel that way about dancing. I don't understand why you just kind of just move your body in the rhythm of the sound you're hearing. It's like, why are we doing this?

• 12:29Will Arnett?

  That's a really tough.

• 12:30Speaker 03

  Who the fuck, man?

• 12:31Jason Bateman?

  No, I understand. I'm not proud of it. It just, it somehow didn't just go, the idea didn't go in right.

• 12:37Sean Hayes?

  It feels good when you connect, it feels good when you connect a part of your body at the same time the music is doing it.

• 12:42Will Arnett?

  Aubrey Plaza is on our show, guys. What is going on? This is insane. Aubrey, I want to get, I want to get down. What makes you tick? Obviously, I know that, so I'm not going to get into that. I know what makes you tick. It's gum.

• 12:54Sean Hayes?

  It's gum.

• 12:57Will Arnett?

  It's been a minute. I went, I'm trying to think.

• 12:59Jason Bateman?

  Nah, how are you?

• 13:00Will Arnett?

  I saw you last summer, I feel like.

• 13:02Speaker 03

  I saw you over the summer, yeah.

• 13:04Will Arnett?

  Yeah, I saw you.

• 13:05Jason Bateman?

  Where, where were we?

• 13:06Will Arnett?

  We were out east, as we say.

• 13:08Jason Bateman?

  Okay, on Long Island.

• 13:10Speaker 03

  Out east, yeah.

• 13:11Will Arnett?

  We're on Long Island.

• 13:12Speaker 03

  Which I'm always corrected, because I always, I always say up.

• 13:14Jason Bateman?

  Up east?

• 13:15Speaker 03

  It's like I'm going upstate or up whatever.

• 13:18Will Arnett?

  You know who does that, you know who does that too? Who does that incessantly is Paula.

• 13:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:22Will Arnett?

  She says up. She says up for everything.

• 13:24Speaker 03

  Never out.

• 13:25Jason Bateman?

  I think you need to be two hours north of Manhattan to be upstate.

• 13:29Speaker 03

  Right.

• 13:30Will Arnett?

  I don't know.

• 13:31Speaker 03

  I just don't know the, I'm learning about the Long Island, it goes the other way.

• 13:35Will Arnett?

  Well, it does go east, but it does go kind of north too. It is kind of angled, so you're not totally.

• 13:39Jason Bateman?

  Aubrey Plaza's on the show today, everybody.

• 13:41Sean Hayes?

  Hey, welcome, Aubrey.

• 13:44Jason Bateman?

  Well, Sean, you want to start with a little, a little?

• 13:47Sean Hayes?

  Sure, I, I, she knows that, you know I adore you. I run into you at the gym sometimes.

• 13:51Speaker 03

  Sean, I was at your opening. I forgot to, I forgot to text you.

• 13:54Jason Bateman?

  Wait a second.

• 13:54Will Arnett?

  You were?

• 13:55Jason Bateman?

  We were at the opening.

• 13:55Will Arnett?

  Jason wants to know about this. Okay, walk us through it.

• 13:58Speaker 03

  I was there.

• 13:59Jason Bateman?

  Wait, wait.

• 14:00Sean Hayes?

  You were the opening when the lights went out.

• 14:01Speaker 03

  Yes, I was.

• 14:02Jason Bateman?

  Oh, where? So, we weren't at the opening. Where, when were we there, Sean?

• 14:05Sean Hayes?

  You were the day, the day after.

• 14:07Jason Bateman?

  The day after.

• 14:08Will Arnett?

  Wait, so Aubrey.

• 14:09Speaker 03

  You handled that great, by the way. You were awesome.

• 14:11Sean Hayes?

  Oh, thanks.

• 14:11Jason Bateman?

  Thanks, dude.

• 14:12Will Arnett?

  Wait, so Aubrey, you went to, Aubrey, you went to the show, you went to the show?

• 14:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 14:15Will Arnett?

  And you enjoyed it, and Sean was great, and then you did not go back and say hi to him?

• 14:19Sean Hayes?

  Oh, here we go.

• 14:20Speaker 03

  No, I bolted the minute it was over.

• 14:21Will Arnett?

  Jason, thoughts?

• 14:23Jason Bateman?

  Okay.

• 14:24Sean Hayes?

  I understand that.

• 14:25Speaker 03

  Nobody wants to talk after.

• 14:27Jason Bateman?

  No, they don't.

• 14:28Speaker 03

  Nobody wants that.

• 14:29Jason Bateman?

  Well, Sean does.

• 14:30Speaker 03

  Who would want that?

• 14:31Jason Bateman?

  And then he wants to take a picture in the elevator.

• 14:32Speaker 03

  Oh, no, not me.

• 14:34Will Arnett?

  Wait, JB, go.

• 14:35Jason Bateman?

  The photo book you could make in the elevator.

• 14:37Speaker 03

  I leave while people are standing.

• 14:39Sean Hayes?

  Scotty takes all those photos.

• 14:40Jason Bateman?

  I know he does, bless him. Now, Aubrey, you're a theater gal. You've done your runs at, what is it? ATC and a couple other hotspots I've seen on the Wikipedia page.

• 14:52Will Arnett?

  It's so insinuating when you say it like that.

• 14:53Speaker 03

  I've done two plays.

• 14:55Jason Bateman?

  I know. Well, it's two more than I've done. I'm very jealous. But you're more seasoned than I am, so you might have a take on this. I have heard that it is polite.

• 15:04Sean Hayes?

  Here we go.

• 15:06Jason Bateman?

  Polite and industry norm to if you're famous and the person in the play is famous, well, then you kind of have to go backstage and say, hi, I'm famous, you're famous, I enjoyed your show. And if you don't, then that is you're effectively saying, I didn't like the piece.

• 15:23Speaker 03

  No.

• 15:25Jason Bateman?

  This is what I hear.

• 15:26Speaker 03

  Well, not at the opening. Everybody was there.

• 15:27Jason Bateman?

  Very impolite.

• 15:29Speaker 03

  Not at the opening, though, right?

• 15:30Jason Bateman?

  The opening is a...

• 15:31Speaker 03

  There's just too many people there.

• 15:33Sean Hayes?

  It doesn't matter either way to me, honestly. Swear to God.

• 15:36Jason Bateman?

  I know, but I guess...

• 15:36Speaker 03

  Anna Wintour was there.

• 15:38Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 15:39Sean Hayes?

  Anna Wintour, and she emailed me after.

• 15:40Jason Bateman?

  Anna...

• 15:41Sean Hayes?

  Really? So nice.

• 15:42Speaker 03

  I really did mean to email you. You were great. I really mean, I meant to.

• 15:46Jason Bateman?

  Is it Wintour or Winter?

• 15:50Sean Hayes?

  Wintour, I think, because it's T-O-U-R.

• 15:52Speaker 03

  Anna Winter? I don't know.

• 15:53Will Arnett?

  I'm not sure.

• 15:54Sean Hayes?

  Aubrey, I remember the, I said this to you before many times, and I know we've run into each other a million times, and I love you, is the first time I met you, which is, I was in Amy Poehler's trailer. I was on the set of Parks and Rec, and the whole cast was in there.

• 16:09Jason Bateman?

  Amy lives in a trailer?

• 16:10Sean Hayes?

  Yeah. And you were sitting there with Aziz and Amy and just tons of other, like, people on the crew, other people.

• 16:18Will Arnett?

  Sounds like a packed trailer.

• 16:20Sean Hayes?

  It was, there was lots of people in there. And I said, I looked at you and I go, what do you do on the show? Dude, are you working the crew? And you said, I'm on the show.

• 16:31Speaker 03

  Really? I don't remember that.

• 16:33Sean Hayes?

  That's okay. I felt so bad and I emailed you a long email after.

• 16:36Will Arnett?

  You felt bad enough that you wanted to bring it up again today?

• 16:39Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 16:41Speaker 03

  I thought we met at the gym.

• 16:43Will Arnett?

  Remember when I insulted you?

• 16:45Jason Bateman?

  And then we met at the- What did she, did she strike you as a, as a, as a P A?

• 16:49Sean Hayes?

  No, you were the quietest one. Like, you didn't say anything in the trailer. So I was just like, hi.

• 16:53Speaker 03

  I didn't know what was going on. I didn't even realize I was on a television show for like two seasons.

• 16:56Will Arnett?

  I do believe that. I do believe that.

• 16:59Jason Bateman?

  Now, so let's go, let's, let's stay with Parks and Rec. Um, is it true Wiki says that you talked Mike Schur and Greg Daniels into changing the part to be a little bit more how it beca- how it is, how it became. It wasn't originally that. True? Untrue?

• 17:16Speaker 03

  What do you mean? Like, as the show went on?

• 17:18Jason Bateman?

  No, no. Like, when you went in there and you first met with them. You were like, the, the part was written a certain way and you were like, yeah, but wouldn't it be funnier if it was this?

• 17:26Speaker 03

  I don't, well, I don't think they had technically written it yet, but I remember I went, I rem- I went in for like a general meeting and I had no, and I really didn't have any idea how much like weight was on that meeting. Cause I, I was, I didn't have an agent.

• 17:41Jason Bateman?

  Alison Jones set you up with that general?

• 17:42Speaker 03

  Alison Jones. I came out cause I was-

• 17:44Jason Bateman?

  The great Alison Jones.

• 17:45Speaker 03

  Screen testing for Judd Apatow's movie.

• 17:48Jason Bateman?

  The great Judd Apatow.

• 17:49Speaker 03

  And that was huge for me. Cause I was like plucked out of nowhere. And then I was in LA for a week and I hadn't really been to LA. So Alison was like, do you mind if I just send you on a couple other meetings? And I was like-

• 18:00Jason Bateman?

  Isn't your agent supposed to do that?

• 18:01Speaker 03

  Sure, lady. I didn't have an agent yet.

• 18:03Jason Bateman?

  What a nice, what a nice lady she is.

• 18:05Will Arnett?

  Wait, wait. Plaza, what were you-

• 18:06Speaker 03

  I didn't have an agent yet.

• 18:07Will Arnett?

  What were you doing? Where were you? Where did she pluck you from and how?

• 18:11Jason Bateman?

  U C B.

• 18:11Speaker 03

  She found me at a whorehouse.

• 18:16Jason Bateman?

  Oh no. Aubrey.

• 18:19Will Arnett?

  Don't, Plaza, don't say that.

• 18:20Sean Hayes?

  What's the problem?

• 18:21Will Arnett?

  Plaza, don't.

• 18:22Jason Bateman?

  Things were hard for me.

• 18:23Will Arnett?

  No, don't say that, Plaza.

• 18:24Speaker 03

  I was at Howard Beach, Queens in a whorehouse.

• 18:27Will Arnett?

  Oh my god.

• 18:28Speaker 03

  Sucking.

• 18:29Will Arnett?

  Googling, Googling.

• 18:31Speaker 03

  I was- I was doing UCB shows and I was, it was, I don't know, actually. She, I think it was, yeah, it was, I was doing UCB and, and Judd was doing like a very wide casting call because he wanted to cast an unknown comedian to play this part. And so I made it up the ranks, like, like sending my videos in and stuff. And then I made it and then I kind of like made, Allison saw my tape. I somehow got a tape to her with the scene. Um, and then I, and then, yeah. So then it was like, I made it all the levels to the point where they were like, and now you're going to come to LA and do a screen test.

• 19:10Will Arnett?

  Yeah. And were you, were you like on, did you, did you have like your own sketch group at UCB or?

• 19:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, I was like, I was in a sketch group called That's My Booze.

• 19:22Will Arnett?

  Uh huh. With, who were your contemporaries at that time? Did any, because I remember you were a little after, I wasn't hanging around at UCB as much then, but like it was like, because I remember Aziz and those guys and Riggle and Sheeran, those guys back in those days when they were all there.

• 19:37Speaker 03

  Yeah, like Aziz, Aziz and I were kind of in the same class, but Aziz wasn't really doing like improv so much, but he would, but he would be in the sketch, you know, part of it. And then like, you know, it was like Kroll and Manzoukis and Pally and Zach Woods and Lennon Parham and all those guys like were kind of above me. Like Anthony King and Kate Spencer and Joe Wangert and all the, and Chris Gethard and I could go on, but they, they were kind of like

• 20:07Will Arnett?

  So much talent.

• 20:07Speaker 03

  seniors when I was like a freshman.

• 20:09Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 20:10Speaker 03

  But I was kind of young and I was friends with them and I was like dating Joe Wangert at the time, who was kind of running the school, like the, that, there's a fly, sorry.

• 20:22Will Arnett?

  I know, now it's over here.

• 20:24Speaker 03

  It's anxiety. I have to move my arms like this.

• 20:26Will Arnett?

  Were you, were you, would you go to like Ascot on Sunday nights and, or at least watch or?

• 20:32Speaker 03

  I would, yeah, yeah. These are all sketch shows. Yeah. I mean, and when I was, yeah, I would, I would watch, I would stand in the back. I would see.

• 20:38Will Arnett?

  Did I ever meet you back then, like back before we became friends?

• 20:42Speaker 03

  So many times.

• 20:43Will Arnett?

  No, you're kidding. No, don't, don't say it like that. Don't say it like that.

• 20:47Speaker 03

  I'm, I, I'm sure we met. I don't remember anything. Do you miss sketch comedy? Everyone was drunk in those days.

• 20:53Will Arnett?

  That's true.

• 20:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, I love, I miss sketch comedy.

• 20:56Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 20:57Speaker 03

  I would love to do like a sketch.

• 20:58Sean Hayes?

  It's still happening, you know, you guys. It's still going on.

• 21:00Speaker 03

  Where?

• 21:01Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, no, you can find it.

• 21:02Will Arnett?

  By the way, where?

• 21:03Sean Hayes?

  Does you, UCB's still going, yes? Hello?

• 21:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:08Jason Bateman?

  I don't.

• 21:10Sean Hayes?

  Guys, anybody can answer this.

• 21:12Will Arnett?

  It's changed, right?

• 21:14Speaker 03

  It's going.

• 21:14Sean Hayes?

  I think it, I think it was gone, like, somebody bought it or then it went away or something, and now it's back.

• 21:19Speaker 03

  It's a very different, it's a, yes, it's back. But it's a different, I'm so, I feel, I do feel very removed from, because I was real, I never did even UCB in LA. Like, UCB LA to me was like, what? This isn't.

• 21:32Will Arnett?

  Right, right, right.

• 21:33Speaker 03

  Anything.

• 21:33Will Arnett?

  You were.

• 21:35Sean Hayes?

  Only New York.

• 21:35Will Arnett?

  You were up on 8th Avenue.

• 21:37Speaker 03

  I was in that Gristides basement.

• 21:38Will Arnett?

  Yeah, in the Gristides basement, yeah.

• 21:42Sean Hayes?

  And we will be right back.

• 21:46Sean Hayes?

  Sonos is a sound system engineered to make you feel. You know how you can walk into a room and it just has a certain mood? The right music can completely change that. You put on a song everyone knows, and suddenly people are hanging out, singing along, maybe dancing around a little bit. It just changes the energy. And with Sonos throughout the house, you can keep that going from room to room. The music basically moves through the house with you. I've had Sonos for years and years and years, and I pump it through the house when I'm getting ready to go out, when we're having people over for dinner, and it's really, really terrific. And when I want to, I just lift it up off the base and take it outside. You can actually move it outside, and it's so cool. It makes outside just as great listening as inside.

• 22:31Sean Hayes?

  So whether you're trying to wind down, get some energy going, have people over, whatever it is, Sonos helps set the mood. Love the sound, feel the system. Visit sonos.com to build your system.

• 22:47Sean Hayes?

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• 23:30Sean Hayes?

  Basically, Harvey is helping legal teams spend less time on repetitive work and more time on the big-picture stuff. This is how the future of agreements is being crafted now. Harvey. Learn more at harvey.ai. That's harvey.ai. Harvey does not provide legal advice. Users should always independently review and verify any output provided by Harvey.

• 23:53Jason Bateman?

  Did you ever notice the best deals are just obvious? Like hotels.com. What do they do, you may ask? Hotels on the internet. And a lot of them, like hundreds of thousands. I don't know why I just turned into Sean Hayes. Plus, if you join for free, you can save up to 20% instantly with member prices, and you earn rewards every time you book. So, your next trip basically starts paying for itself. It's simple, and you get more out of every stay. Sign up for free and book today. Hotels.com. It's all in the name.

• 24:33Sean Hayes?

  Fall means cozy meals, game days, and an excuse to bring home something sweet. Whole Foods Market keeps the focus on flavor with no artificial sweeteners like sucralose, artificial colors like red dye number 40, or high-fructose corn syrup store-wide. For game day, grab made-in-house wings, frozen pizzas, and 365 brand chips and dips. Finish with limited-time pumpkin blondies, apple brown butter cookies, or chocolate bourbon pecan pie. Shop fall flavors with higher standards at Whole Foods Market.

• 25:13Sean Hayes?

  And now, back to the show.

• 25:17Jason Bateman?

  All right, so then, Upright Citizens Brigade for Tracy and the rest who don't know, that is an improv sketch place you go and you yell a sort of a prompt to the talented folks onstage.

• 25:31Will Arnett?

  That was Ask At. That was the one show when they would do like a Herald. That's one type of it. Yeah, basically. It was a place that was created by Amy Poehler and by Matt Walsh and Matt Besser and Ian Roberts.

• 25:42Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 25:42Will Arnett?

  And they came from Chicago and they created this thing. They were a sketch group, Upright Citizens Brigade, and then they created this whole theater and a school and stuff in New York back in the day. Yeah, like Second City. And they would do those Herald's, like you said, Sunday nights they do Ask At, Jason, which you went to many times.

• 25:56Speaker 03

  I was on a Herald team. That's how, that was the thing. You wanted to be on a Herald team. That was the main.

• 26:01Will Arnett?

  And a Herald was that, where you have a suggestion and then you kind of bring everything back and you're kind of telling a long-form improv. Go ahead, Jason.

• 26:08Jason Bateman?

  But, yes, so.

• 26:10Will Arnett?

  My explanation was a hint of how long yours was gonna be.

• 26:13Jason Bateman?

  No, no. Mine was gonna actually be one of the rare Jason short things.

• 26:18Will Arnett?

  I don't know.

• 26:18Jason Bateman?

  I was going to get to, this is a place where you go where there is no pre-written dialogue.

• 26:24Will Arnett?

  Yes.

• 26:25Jason Bateman?

  You then, Aubrey Plaza, went on to start your acting career, yes, with the scripted stuff. And how did you find that? How did you find that transition where you have to now, instead of making up what you say, follow what is already pre-written? The typical actor journey.

• 26:46Speaker 03

  I mean, I always, that's what I, I love movies. I'm like a movie person real, I mean, I'm a, I love comedy and improv, but I, for me, it was always like, how do I get to the movies part? Like, that was always, you know.

• 27:02Jason Bateman?

  And what was the first, what was the first stuff? Were you doing some of that scripted stuff while you were also playing around over there?

• 27:09Speaker 03

  I mean, I tried. I was like, you know, auditioning for whatever I could when I was doing comedy stuff, but.

• 27:16Jason Bateman?

  But it really didn't start till you came out here to LA?

• 27:18Speaker 03

  Yeah. I mean, I really, truly did have like a big break moment, like the funny people. Funny People was technically first, but like,

• 27:27Sean Hayes?

  Oh, Funny People, yeah.

• 27:28Speaker 03

  You know, I've told the story.

• 27:29Jason Bateman?

  So then you got that Judd screen test. You got it.

• 27:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, so basically, like, I went out to LA for one week and I got, I, I, I booked Funny People, Parks and Rec, and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World in one week.

• 27:41Jason Bateman?

  Boom.

• 27:42Will Arnett?

  Oh, my god.

• 27:43Sean Hayes?

  Wow, that's crazy.

• 27:44Speaker 03

  Boom bada bing. And it was like, what?

• 27:48Jason Bateman?

  Did Alison, did Alison cast Scott Pilgrim 2?

• 27:53Speaker 03

  What?

• 27:53Jason Bateman?

  Did Alison cast Scott Pilgrim 2?

• 27:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, she, she sent me on all those meetings. And like, the Parks and Rec meeting, like, nods a backtrack was like, they hadn't written the script yet. And Mike and, Cher and Greg Daniels were in the room. And I just went into Mike's office and I was just having a casual conversation with him. And he just kind of said like,

• 28:12Jason Bateman?

  You know what else you booked that week? Michael Sarah. Let's talk about Michael Sarah.

• 28:16Sean Hayes?

  Wait, what? Scott Pilgrim, you mean?

• 28:18Jason Bateman?

  Wait, but didn't you guys, you guys dated for a while, right? Didn't you guys date for a while? This, this was, but this was news to me when I was reading Wikipedia this morning.

• 28:27Speaker 03

  Booked that baby right in.

• 28:29Jason Bateman?

  He was my son. And you were my daughter at one point.

• 28:33Speaker 03

  Oh, I'm sorry. Okay, sure, sure.

• 28:33Jason Bateman?

  You know, so it was like, oh, well, that's kind of, and that's sort of like your dad's.

• 28:38Speaker 03

  Booked and bagged him real good.

• 28:40Jason Bateman?

  Booked and bagged.

• 28:41Will Arnett?

  Well, we found our first cut. There we go. We found our first thing that we wanted. No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

• 28:46Jason Bateman?

  But Wiki said it was 18 months. That's a significant relationship. That's a, that's a good thing, right?

• 28:51Speaker 03

  Was it? Wow.

• 28:51Sean Hayes?

  That was a long time ago.

• 28:52Speaker 03

  No, we, we were, we, we were,

• 28:54Jason Bateman?

  We were gonna get married for a second.

• 28:56Speaker 03

  And we're still very good friends. I love him so much. We almost got married. We drove across the country together, eating a bag of edibles.

• 29:08Jason Bateman?

  Edibles.

• 29:09Speaker 03

  Crumbs of edibles. And we drove to Vegas with the plan to get married and then get divorced right away so we could call each other our ex-wife and ex-husband forever. Because we thought that would be a really good bit.

• 29:22Will Arnett?

  That's a great bit.

• 29:23Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, that is a good bet.

• 29:24Speaker 03

  But then, I think it was a combination of being too high and paranoid. And then, at that time, he was just very, very famous at that time. He like, really, if you remember, like, when Nick and Nora and all that stuff came out, he was super bad. He was so recognizable that like, we went, I feel like we got in line at the County office or something and then everyone started running and we ran. So that's kind of all I remember what happened.

• 29:53Jason Bateman?

  Wow, the fame saved you.

• 29:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, it was too.

• 29:57Jason Bateman?

  The rare case.

• 29:58Speaker 03

  I'm pretty sure that's how it went down. Yeah, we bailed, but.

• 30:02Jason Bateman?

  Um, now, what?

• 30:07Jason Bateman?

  I'm gonna stay, I'm gonna stay in, again, what the great, great Wikipedia has laid out for me here, that in going in chronological order, and I'm sorry if this is a, we don't have to talk about this if you don't want to, but it is, I think you've talked about it before, there was, at that time, you had a rare stroke? That a young person, very rare for a young person to have a stroke.

• 30:28Speaker 03

  I did. I had one at, I was 20, so it was before then, but it was when I was in New York, yeah. I was doing, yeah, I was doing UCB comedy stuff. I was in college.

• 30:38Jason Bateman?

  Well, you've got Sean's attention. Sean, Sean's running from a stroke every day.

• 30:43Speaker 03

  Oh, you didn't know?

• 30:44Jason Bateman?

  He's, he's convinced.

• 30:45Sean Hayes?

  Tell me, wait, how did you, how did you, how did it, like, how did it happen? And what did you feel?

• 30:50Speaker 03

  It happened like, truly in mid-sentence, out of nowhere. It's a horrifying story.

• 30:56Sean Hayes?

  You just start slurring your words?

• 30:57Speaker 03

  It's a horrifying story. Um, I had, uh, taken my sister to a Hilary Duff concert the night before.

• 31:04Jason Bateman?

  Sure.

• 31:04Speaker 03

  Um, and you know how that goes. And then, um, and then I, I was having lunch in Queens. I went, I took the subway, I was feeling normal, I had my coat on still, I walked into my friend's apartment in Astoria to have lunch with them, and I was telling them about the Hilary Duff concert. And I said, like, Hilary Duff, and then I stroked out.

• 31:26Jason Bateman?

  No way.

• 31:27Speaker 03

  And I kind of, the first thing that happened was like, my right arm was numb, and I looked down and I was confused. I wasn't slurring, but I was looking at my arm, like, that's not my arm. It wasn't even numb, it was just not connected to my body, and then.

• 31:42Jason Bateman?

  Wow.

• 31:43Speaker 03

  Then I kind of blacked out for like a second, and then I came to. Could move my arms, but I couldn't speak because the blood clot was in my language center.

• 31:52Jason Bateman?

  No. Oh my gosh.

• 31:54Speaker 03

  So it was like not even slurring, it was just like not talking.

• 31:58Jason Bateman?

  Not talking.

• 31:58Speaker 03

  But I could understand everything that was happening.

• 32:00Jason Bateman?

  And how does somebody at 20 years old get a blood clot or get a heart attack or whatever, or stroke?

• 32:05Speaker 03

  I don't know. It's a, honestly, it's a mystery. I, I think it was birth control or the tricyclin. That was the only thing I was putting in my body. Like I wasn't on drugs or, you know, doing anything weird. So it was a real fluke. Like, and even to this day, like I still have to, you know, whenever I go to the doctors, I have to fill out like my history and.

• 32:28Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 32:29Speaker 03

  I've seen, I've seen top neurologists, I've been tested for, you know, all the blood disorders and clotting disorders and everything. And it's just like, I really think it, it must have been birth control because they have that on the label.

• 32:43Jason Bateman?

  So then what, well, did they, were you, were you fine right then or did they take you to the hospital? Like, how do they fix?

• 32:50Speaker 03

  I was not fine because I wasn't, I wasn't, I wasn't talking. And so my friends were like, first of course, thought I was doing a bit and they were like, stop it. And then they realized like something's wrong. And so the paramedics came.

• 33:06Jason Bateman?

  And sorry, are you lucid at this point? Like, are you aware that this is happening to you?

• 33:10Speaker 03

  I'm aware. Like, it's a really weird thing when you have a stroke. I've read books about it. And it's, it's across the board, really similar experience that people have. You know what's happening and your brain, there's, it really makes you understand that there's your brain. And then there's something else going on, which is very profound to think about because I was, whatever that other thing is, was watching my brain malfunction. And so I was, me was aware that my brain wasn't working right. So it's this really fucked up thing where you're like, wait a minute. Like my consciousness is operating on another level. And so people would talk to me

• 33:51Speaker 03

  and I would know how to respond to them. I would know the answer, but I could not get it through the pathways of my brain out of my mouth.

• 34:00Jason Bateman?

  Did you, did it, I mean this, did you?

• 34:04Will Arnett?

  After that experience, did it give you a sort of a different sense on, on, I don't know how to say it, like spirituality? Did you, do you feel like a, do you have?

• 34:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:14Will Arnett?

  As you said, because you're sort of conscious or whatever, this other thing that's operating.

• 34:17Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, did it change your view of like?

• 34:19Will Arnett?

  The way that, yeah, did it change the way that you look at stuff and look at spirituality and stuff like that?

• 34:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, 100, like 100 million percent. Like I definitely.

• 34:27Jason Bateman?

  Hondo P.

• 34:29Speaker 03

  Hondo P just felt like, all right, well, if that's true, then like something bigger is, something bigger is going, I am very fascinated with that.

• 34:40Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, I am too now.

• 34:42Will Arnett?

  Well, so I, when I say, I guess it did change, but were you, I don't know, it sounds like such a sort of sweeping, were you a spiritual person before? But did you have, what were your thoughts on that kind of stuff before?

• 34:53Speaker 03

  Well, I grew up really, I grew up Catholic. I grew up very Catholic. I was, I went to all girls, you know, I went to all girls Catholic school my whole life. And so, you know, my spirituality was like very wrapped up in like saints and God and Jesus and, you know, and things like that. But, um, but, uh, I would say that I've always, I feel like I've always been a spiritual person, you know, now I've shifted into more the dark arts, you know?

• 35:22Will Arnett?

  Oh, paganism.

• 35:25Sean Hayes?

  Sure, yeah. You're like, by the way, can I get a sample of you guys' blood after this?

• 35:30Will Arnett?

  And then she goes, don't, don't bother, I've already got it.

• 35:35Speaker 03

  It's my shtick, the whole witch thing. But no, I am. And I think I did really stop, at least for some time, for some time, like sweating the small stuff a little bit. Like I felt, I did have, I did really feel like, wow, A, the trauma of something like that happening so out of nowhere changes the way your brain is because you're like, well, okay, if that can happen like that, then the fuck else can happen? And what's the point of, you know?

• 36:02Jason Bateman?

  Right. You're not walking around thinking like that can happen like today, are you? Like?

• 36:06Speaker 03

  Not anymore, but I was after that. I was very like PTSD.

• 36:11Will Arnett?

  Did it make you less cynical, do you think?

• 36:14Speaker 03

  I think, yeah, I think so.

• 36:16Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 36:17Speaker 03

  Even though contrary to popular.

• 36:19Jason Bateman?

  That might straighten you out, Will.

• 36:20Will Arnett?

  No, I don't think that you're cynical at all. I don't.

• 36:23Sean Hayes?

  So, but you would never take birth control, whatever that thing is now, right?

• 36:28Will Arnett?

  I probably wouldn't.

• 36:29Sean Hayes?

  If that was the one.

• 36:30Will Arnett?

  For Aubrey.

• 36:32Sean Hayes?

  But if that was the one thing that you could kind of point to.

• 36:35Speaker 03

  Well.

• 36:40Speaker 03

  There's a baby inside of me.

• 36:42Sean Hayes?

  What's that?

• 36:43Jason Bateman?

  Hold. Hold.

• 36:44Will Arnett?

  Wait, wait, wait.

• 36:45Sean Hayes?

  Wait, what did you say? What did you say?

• 36:49Speaker 03

  No, I said there is a baby inside of me right now.

• 36:51Will Arnett?

  Is that a true story?

• 36:53Sean Hayes?

  Is that true?

• 36:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's true.

• 36:55Sean Hayes?

  What? Wait, seriously? That's amazing!

• 36:58Will Arnett?

  That's so good.

• 36:59Speaker 03

  Oh, thanks.

• 37:02Sean Hayes?

  That's very exciting.

• 37:04Speaker 03

  I know. It's shocking, isn't it?

• 37:06Will Arnett?

  I know.

• 37:07Sean Hayes?

  That's really cool. That's really, really cool.

• 37:09Jason Bateman?

  Is this baby number one?

• 37:10Speaker 03

  Yes. That's right, number one.

• 37:12Jason Bateman?

  How exciting, Aubrey.

• 37:14Speaker 03

  I'll just say this. Today was a big day. I went to the doctors today. And my dog also went to the doctors.

• 37:21Jason Bateman?

  Also pregnant?

• 37:23Speaker 03

  My dog's getting a scan right now. I got a scan earlier. I'm not kidding.

• 37:27Jason Bateman?

  Boy.

• 37:28Speaker 03

  Frankie's getting an ultrasound on her stomach. She'll be back. When is she back? 2 o'clock. We'll find out. I think she's okay. She had to get an ultrasound on her stomach. And then I got an ultrasound on my stomach and there is a baby in there.

• 37:42Sean Hayes?

  That's amazing. That's so exciting.

• 37:44Will Arnett?

  Happy for you.

• 37:45Speaker 03

  Yeah. And it already has like a cloak and a little hat and.

• 37:49Jason Bateman?

  No.

• 37:50Speaker 03

  I think it's gonna come out.

• 37:52Jason Bateman?

  But let me ask you something. If the ultrasound was, if you got the ultrasound out at the vet, I would recommend that you go.

• 37:59Will Arnett?

  No, no, no, Jason.

• 38:00Speaker 03

  No, I did accidentally go to the vet first, but then that's why I was late.

• 38:04Will Arnett?

  Aubrey, I'm so happy for you. I just think, you know that. I just think you're such a great person.

• 38:10Sean Hayes?

  Oh, you'll be a fantastic mom.

• 38:12Will Arnett?

  I'm really happy for you. Yep. I'm really, really, really happy for you. That's so awesome. You've always got, you're so funny and you're so. Just such a great person.

• 38:21Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, aren't you excited about being a mom? I mean, this is, you're gonna be great.

• 38:24Speaker 03

  I, I am, yeah. I've always, I've always wanted, I've always wanted to see what that's all about, you know? It just seems so interesting.

• 38:33Jason Bateman?

  How incredible. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.

• 38:36Sean Hayes?

  Congratulations, it's all great news. It's very, very thrilling.

• 38:40Will Arnett?

  Aubrey, you've been so busy too. I mean, you.

• 38:44Sean Hayes?

  Are you, are you working right now?

• 38:45Will Arnett?

  First of all, I was realizing last year, I want to talk about this because I don't think it got enough, and you and I texted about it last year. I watched your movie Emily the Criminal. And I know it's long gone and whatever. I thought that was such a great movie. Your performance in that was so, so good, Plaza. I mean.

• 39:01Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 39:02Will Arnett?

  Really, I don't know if you guys saw it. What an awesome movie and what a great performance.

• 39:07Jason Bateman?

  All I know is every time I see you in any, I didn't see that, that particular one, but every time I see you in anything, I'm always stunned by how, how confident you are in being still. I just find it is, it's, it's such a, it's so, it's so, um, in, uh, I don't know, it's not attractive or infectious is not the word I'm looking for. As an audience member, I'm just, I'm drawn in and I can't stop watching somebody who's so comfortable not helping me as an audience member, knowing what's going on inside your, your head, you know, like I lean forward.

• 39:41Will Arnett?

  And being able to do that, JB, like in a, in a drama where you have to be very sort of vulnerable, very real, and then being able to, and also do it in comedy, you have so, you have such facility with all of it. And I think it's really impressive.

• 39:54Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, so subtle.

• 39:55Will Arnett?

  I just, I hope people go back and re-watch that and then continue to watch the newer stuff. But I wanted to say that because you know how much I love that movie.

• 40:01Speaker 03

  Thank you for saying that. I love that movie. That was such a baby of mine, that, that film. I'm so proud of it. Like, I just want, the script was so good. And I was like, as a producer, you know, just like, if we could just, it really taught me that it is always the fucking script. It's like, it is the fucking script. I'm like, if we shoot the script exactly how it's written, the movie is gonna be good. And it was, we didn't compromise, and that was what I was so proud of. We did, really didn't compromise the script, and then the movie turned out great. And obviously, so many other things have to happen to make, you know, to make that happen, but I,

• 40:38Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 40:38Speaker 03

  It taught me that.

• 40:40Jason Bateman?

  Where did you, where did your, where did your, where did your taste for what your particular style, where did that come from? Was, were one of your parents particularly dry? Was there, was there a, an actor or an actress that you really admired coming up?

• 40:57Speaker 03

  I don't know, I don't know. I don't know. I don't even think, I mean, I don't even know. It's hard for me to really have perspective on that at all, because I feel like the dry, the deadpan, maybe I have, maybe that's how, I wasn't really always like that growing, like, that wasn't like really my thing. But then I think that the things that I got cast in first, like, character-wise, for me, like, I'm not saying like, oh, I'm a method actor, but like, I do think that like, I capitalized on this persona early on, because the funny people role was really based on, you know, and, and I know that it wasn't officially said, but I'm pretty sure that it was based

• 41:41Speaker 03

  on Janine Garofalo, and so, and I kinda knew that, and I studied her and her stand-up routines.

• 41:47Jason Bateman?

  Right, also incredibly dry and hilarious.

• 41:49Speaker 03

  Right, and she was like, you know, she's such a hero of mine, like, loved watching her, and then the Parks and Rec character was also kind of born out of that same, there was a lot of stuff that, there was a zone there that I was like, I couldn't do that.

• 42:04Jason Bateman?

  Are you ever, are you ever, do you ever allow yourself to, to think somewhat strategically about, well, maybe I should play a part that shows that I can do the, all the, the other side of the spectrum as well? I mean, is that, do you, are you one of those actors that, that considers that kind of thing?

• 42:20Speaker 03

  I mean, that, I think, I think. When I was on Parks, definitely, because I was always like, get me out of, get me out of this zone. I gotta show people what I can do.

• 42:31Speaker 03

  You know, so I was always like, you know, Dirty Grandpa was an example where I was like, get me that fucking part like, that has nothing to do with. But, but now I'm more just like, I just wanna be, I just honestly just wanna be in something good. I don't even care. It's not even about, oh, I wanna, you know, blow everyone away with my performance, but I wanna be in movies that people remember, watch more than once.

• 42:55Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 42:56Speaker 03

  That don't just float away into the ether that it's like they never, that never happened.

• 43:01Jason Bateman?

  And the producing effort is, is in that, in that direction, yeah? Is it to sort of like, start to like, cook your own food, right? And as opposed to just react to the phone ringing and?

• 43:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I want, I'm still an actor, like, I'm still like, where, why is no one calling me like?

• 43:18Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 43:20Speaker 03

  Where am I?

• 43:22Will Arnett?

  I find that hard to believe.

• 43:23Jason Bateman?

  Right, right, right.

• 43:24Will Arnett?

  Really hard.

• 43:24Speaker 03

  No, I mean, no, no, no, you, no, I get, I get a lot of, I get a lot of, I'm in a very good, I'm very grateful for my, you know, position, whatever. I get offered things, of course, but like, I still have that like actor thing where I'm like, yeah. But producing, I think, was at first very much about like, all right, well, if I'm not gonna get, you know, offered parts that I really want, then I'll just fucking do it myself.

• 43:48Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 43:48Speaker 03

  But now it's more, but then I really, but I really, I went to film school, you know, I studied film.

• 43:53Jason Bateman?

  NYU.

• 43:55Speaker 03

  At NYU, I studied directing and producing and I, I truly love the craft of filmmaking, like, I really love movies. So like, it all, it's also, has nothing to do with acting and it's really about just start, you know, making something from the very beginning to the very end and seeing it through and being like, you know, how can I make a great film?

• 44:13Jason Bateman?

  Did you have a favorite movie this year? The Oscars was like a month ago.

• 44:18Speaker 03

  You know.

• 44:19Jason Bateman?

  Did you love any of those?

• 44:21Speaker 03

  This year was really tough for me.

• 44:23Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 44:24Speaker 03

  I just could not get into any of it. I will say, and I don't understand why Eddington

• 44:31Jason Bateman?

  I know.

• 44:32Speaker 03

  just got, why everyone's pretending that movie didn't happen.

• 44:34Jason Bateman?

  I love that movie.

• 44:35Speaker 03

  Hello, that movie's fucking great, and I don't want to hear it.

• 44:39Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 44:39Speaker 03

  That movie's great. So like, I don't know what everyone's...

• 44:43Jason Bateman?

  I love that movie too. I totally agree with you.

• 44:44Speaker 03

  What the hell was that? Where did that go?

• 44:47Jason Bateman?

  I don't understand. Apparently, like, it wasn't embraced at Cannes, where it premiered.

• 44:52Speaker 03

  Whatever, no divisive filmmakers.

• 44:55Will Arnett?

  Oh, gracias.

• 44:57Speaker 03

  Just...

• 44:58Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, that was a stunning movie. I thought that was incredible.

• 45:00Speaker 03

  In certain regard, this motherfucker.

• 45:03Will Arnett?

  I'm sitting on a really stupid pun that, but it's too far removed from what we were talking about.

• 45:08Jason Bateman?

  Well, just go for it now.

• 45:09Will Arnett?

  No, but it's just like OCD and now I just want to get it out.

• 45:12Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 45:12Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, and you've stopped the momentum, so while we're stopped.

• 45:15Will Arnett?

  Oh, you were saying the parts aren't coming, and then, you know, the parts that you want. And I go, maybe you could do some parts for fun, you know, and you could call them parts for recreation, you know what I mean? And I'm just saying it would be... What I'm saying is, had I said that back then, I wouldn't have had to stop everything. And this is why people hate me on the show.

• 45:36Jason Bateman?

  We'll trim it. We'll trim it. We'll tighten it all up.

• 45:39Will Arnett?

  Yep.

• 45:41Jason Bateman?

  We'll be right back.

• 45:44Sean Hayes?

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• 46:30Sean Hayes?

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• 46:53Sean Hayes?

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• 47:36Sean Hayes?

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• 47:59Sean Hayes?

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• 48:43Sean Hayes?

  And back to the show.

• 48:46Jason Bateman?

  All right, well, I want to, I want to, is there, Delaware, right? That's where we started, this is where the

• 48:53Will Arnett?

  What a question.

• 48:55Sean Hayes?

  That's what I was gonna ask too, but I was gonna ask like, because I've only known you as an adult, I'm fascinated with who you were as a child, and were you this dry and funny and witty? And were your friends, did you have like a circle of friends that shared your sense of humor? Or were you like?

• 49:12Speaker 03

  I, I mean, I definitely, I was definitely a shy kid up until when I discovered theater, like, very classically, like, you know, I went to like the Wilmington Drama League, which is the community theater I learned at, and when I was like 11, and I started to see, oh, people are pretending to be other people, this sounds really fun. And so then all of a sudden, I kind of understood that that was an outlet for me, and then I, and then I think I came out of my shell more, and then by the time I was like, you know, in middle school or whatever, I was like, funny.

• 49:48Jason Bateman?

  And then, and then your summer program at NYU, that was sort of like, okay, there's, a bridge has been built to, to the, to the big city, and that's kind of how that, is that how that role worked?

• 49:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, I think, like, I had a friend who's a comedian, Neil Casey, who you probably know well, writer, really funny comedian, you know, you know Neil.

• 50:08Will Arnett?

  I think I do know Neil, yeah.

• 50:09Speaker 03

  He's an old school UCB guy, but

• 50:11Will Arnett?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 50:11Speaker 03

  Him and I grew up together, he was a little bit older than me, but he went to the all-boys brother school. He introduced me to John Waters' movies and to

• 50:19Will Arnett?

  Oh, wow.

• 50:20Speaker 03

  And to UCB, the operated citizens forget show, those on television, and Kids in the Hall, and Mr. Show, and we got into like, stuff like that as teenagers, like, young teenagers, and then I started to really become like a comedy freak, and, and then develop like, my love for films and movie, you know.

• 50:39Will Arnett?

  Was there any other sort of Who were your comedy idols, sorry, who were your?

• 50:45Will Arnett?

  Did you have?

• 50:45Jason Bateman?

  Janine Garofalo.

• 50:46Will Arnett?

  Well, Janine, Janine, yeah.

• 50:48Speaker 03

  I always blank, I always like blackout when people ask me.

• 50:51Will Arnett?

  I know, I know, forget it.

• 50:52Jason Bateman?

  Was there any other, like, was there any other occupation?

• 50:55Will Arnett?

  I just hope you didn't say me.

• 50:56Jason Bateman?

  Or, or, or industry or career that was, that was battling your, your, your, your, your, your growing dream for this, uh, to be an actor? Like, was there any other thing that you were thinking about maybe going to, to college to study?

• 51:11Speaker 03

  No.

• 51:12Jason Bateman?

  No? This, this was it? You were all in?

• 51:14Will Arnett?

  Fucking dope, I love that.

• 51:15Speaker 03

  I was all in? I was all in. I was like, all in. I was all in.

• 51:19Jason Bateman?

  Mom and dad were okay with that? What, what, what, what did they do?

• 51:22Speaker 03

  They were okay with it. My, my dad was in the finance world. He was a stockbroker. And, um, my mom was a lawyer.

• 51:31Jason Bateman?

  No pressure to, to go into either one of those professions from them?

• 51:34Speaker 03

  Nope. My, my parents were really young when they had me. They were 19 when they had me and they had nothing when I was born, like, really, like hustled and worked their way up in the eighties. And, um, and like, I learned from them, like, how to, you know, hustle.

• 51:52Jason Bateman?

  Hustle, yeah.

• 51:52Speaker 03

  Um, and it didn't matter, like, what field you were in. It was just like, they're, that, that's what they taught me. And, and my mom, I think, also, like, she went to night school when I was a baby to be a lawyer and stuff, but she's a, really introduced me to, like, Saturday Night Live and she's, she's loves theater and movies and I think in another life she would have been doing what I'm doing.

• 52:13Jason Bateman?

  Oh, that's great.

• 52:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, so, so I think like-

• 52:16Jason Bateman?

  They've gotta be thrilled for you then, cause you just, you're all self-created.

• 52:19Speaker 03

  They're so psyched, yeah.

• 52:21Jason Bateman?

  Um, well, let's, let's stay there with Saturday Night Live. So you were, you were a page, um, at one point at, at 30 Rock. Oh, that's cool. I didn't know that. And then, uh, a bunch of years later, uh... What year? She comes back and she hosts Saturday Night Live. That must have been very surreal.

• 52:38Speaker 03

  That was crazy.

• 52:39Jason Bateman?

  Cray cray, right?

• 52:41Speaker 03

  That was crazy. I was a page 2005? It was right after-

• 52:48Speaker 03

  Can't remember, it was after the stroke. I think it was before the stroke. I don't know, after the stroke. But I was an intern, actually. In the 30 Rock building.

• 52:57Jason Bateman?

  Which is higher or lower on the power scale?

• 53:00Speaker 03

  It's weirdly higher than a page.

• 53:03Jason Bateman?

  Really?

• 53:03Speaker 03

  You would think that because-

• 53:05Jason Bateman?

  Because an intern doesn't get paid, but a page does, right?

• 53:07Speaker 03

  But a page gets paid, so you would think, but like, no.

• 53:10Will Arnett?

  A page works for the network and the intern works for the show.

• 53:13Speaker 03

  Exactly. And I was not a very good page. I was like fucking around too much.

• 53:19Jason Bateman?

  What was your problem?

• 53:20Speaker 03

  My problem was I was hungover pretty much every time. So I would have to throw up in the trashcans in the hallway, like mid tour.

• 53:29Jason Bateman?

  What does a page do there?

• 53:31Speaker 03

  Well, if you don't get an assignment, which I never did, maybe once I got one. Which means like you get assigned to a different, a different show. Like the coveted position was the Saturday Night Live pages. To get assigned on SNL. But if you don't get assigned, you're just giving tours. You're, you're, you're on the circuit. You're giving tours to the-

• 53:50Jason Bateman?

  So you had to give tours?

• 53:51Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. I get tours. And then-

• 53:54Jason Bateman?

  I would love to have seen that. What would be so great about being an SNL page? Is it, is it just the fact that you get to hang out there at the desk? And you do like basically mission control where everyone is passing by and-

• 54:06Speaker 03

  You just get to be there. You just get to like watch what's going on and like sit there.

• 54:09Jason Bateman?

  It's pretty amazing.

• 54:10Speaker 03

  And like meet celebrities and get them coffee and like whatever.

• 54:16Jason Bateman?

  So then when you come back as a host, were you, um, did you talk with them more? Did you, was it just sort of just like a private little- Or did you order them around?

• 54:26Speaker 03

  No, I would never talk to a page.

• 54:27Jason Bateman?

  Never.

• 54:30Speaker 03

  No, of course. I mean, every time I go in that building, I'm like, you know, I know, I still know the security guards. Like it feels, you know, that building is so like, it's such a family vibe there. Like it's the best. And like, I'm still, I love my bosses when I was, because I, I was an intern at SNL and a page. But I was an intern in the design department with them. You know Akira and Keith Raywood and Joe and Eugene and.

• 54:59Sean Hayes?

  The design of the of the sets or the costumes or?

• 55:02Speaker 03

  The set designers for the show. And then I did my, when I hosted, I did like my monologue about that. And I had those guys like come on stage. It came totally came full circle, but they were all, yeah, I mean, I love, I love going back there.

• 55:14Sean Hayes?

  Was it emotional at all?

• 55:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's like it was really tripped, it's tripped out, it was very trippy. It's like, it's weird. It's very weird.

• 55:25Sean Hayes?

  When you, so when you grew up, you grew up in Delaware, is that correct?

• 55:29Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 55:29Sean Hayes?

  And then, and then you moved right to New York, right, like when you were a kid?

• 55:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I moved to, yeah, to go to college.

• 55:38Sean Hayes?

  Oh, so Delaware, your whole, you know, up until you were at college and then you went to college in New York. Had you been to New York before then and seen it like, I want to go there and all that or?

• 55:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I, yeah, because Delaware is really only two hours south of the city. People like think it's like five hours away.

• 55:53Sean Hayes?

  It's close.

• 55:54Speaker 03

  It's really close.

• 55:54Sean Hayes?

  It's really close.

• 55:55Speaker 03

  I take the train up all the time.

• 55:58Sean Hayes?

  And then you, and then you went out to LA. So you, basically, my question is, because I always talk about Scotty about living like in a small town somewhere because we're, we're constantly on either coast in New York or Los Angeles, back and forth, back and forth all the time. And there's something appealing about living in a small town somewhere like outside of a city. But I think I might go out of my mind a little bit because I do need. You feel too isolated? Yeah, and I do need the, the stimulation of the noise and, are you like that?

• 56:26Speaker 03

  Um, yeah, yeah, I, yeah, I like the city. I like New York. I'm back in New York, you know.

• 56:32Sean Hayes?

  Are you back in New York now?

• 56:33Speaker 03

  I'm back in New York, baby.

• 56:34Sean Hayes?

  You were?

• 56:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'm back in New York.

• 56:36Sean Hayes?

  So you wouldn't be able to move back to a small, to a small town again? Sean, you wouldn't be able to do that either? I don't think, I, I want to want it, but I don't think I could, I, I would last. Right. But, but maybe.

• 56:50Speaker 03

  I don't know, so sometimes I feel like I could. But where I grew up wasn't, there was, it was a small town vibe in some ways, but Wilmington, Delaware is like, it's a proper city also, so it's not like super.

• 57:03Sean Hayes?

  And you want, and you want to raise your family in, in a city like you are now?

• 57:08Speaker 03

  I, yeah, I mean, I wasn't, you know. Not totally thought through, but I'm like, yeah, I mean, I East Coast for sure. My family's in Philadelphia and Delaware mainly.

• 57:21Jason Bateman?

  Oh, great.

• 57:21Speaker 03

  So I loved, like, one of the reasons I came back here was for that. So I can get on the train and go home, you know.

• 57:29Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 57:29Speaker 03

  My grandmother, yeah.

• 57:31Jason Bateman?

  How are you when you go on a location, like when you're shooting something that's in a faraway place?

• 57:36Will Arnett?

  Like a location?

• 57:37Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, on location, yeah, like White Lotus, for example. Like, are you OK being disconnected from a major cosmopolitan city for a long period of time?

• 57:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'm like very adaptable. Like, I feel like I would, I'm, if I go someplace and I'm there for one day and I'm like, this is it, this is my life for the rest of my life. Like, I'm very, like, I think I would be OK, like, in jail. Like, I'd be like, this is it.

• 58:03Jason Bateman?

  You just make it your home, right?

• 58:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'd be like, this is what I have to eat and this is where.

• 58:08Sean Hayes?

  I say that when I get into an elevator. I'm like, if it breaks down, this is where I'm at. I was here for several hours.

• 58:14Will Arnett?

  That's not true.

• 58:14Jason Bateman?

  That's not true.

• 58:15Will Arnett?

  That's not true, you kept, I asked, you kept Valium in the, in your elevator in London. This is a true story, Aubrey.

• 58:21Sean Hayes?

  I know.

• 58:21Will Arnett?

  He kept a bottle of, he kept a bottle of Valium in his elevator at his place in case it broke down, so he wouldn't freak out. So this goes, this is an absolute fallacy what you're saying right now. There's proof, recent proof of you not being OK being stuck in an elevator.

• 58:36Sean Hayes?

  But I went through, what is that therapy called? I went through that therapy.

• 58:39Jason Bateman?

  I have a game.

• 58:40Speaker 03

  EMDR?

• 58:42Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, what, no, like, what is it called?

• 58:44Jason Bateman?

  Electrotherapy.

• 58:45Sean Hayes?

  When you go, you do the thing you're afraid of.

• 58:47Speaker 03

  EMDR?

• 58:48Sean Hayes?

  No, I forget what it's called.

• 58:49Jason Bateman?

  Shock therapy.

• 58:49Sean Hayes?

  Anyway, exposure, exposure therapy.

• 58:52Jason Bateman?

  OK.

• 58:53Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, so I did that with an elevator.

• 58:54Will Arnett?

  On the subway?

• 58:55Sean Hayes?

  And then I got you.

• 58:55Will Arnett?

  You just, just open up your trench coat? What's going on?

• 59:01Sean Hayes?

  No, I did it, I did exposure therapy and I got, I got over it.

• 59:04Jason Bateman?

  Uh, let's, let's talk about White Lotus for a second. Now, where, where did you shoot that?

• 59:09Speaker 03

  Sicily.

• 59:10Jason Bateman?

  Sicily.

• 59:11Speaker 03

  Five months, uh, it was like four or five months in Sicily and then one month in Rome.

• 59:15Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 59:15Sean Hayes?

  Wow, that's pretty nice.

• 59:17Will Arnett?

  That's pretty, that's pretty fun.

• 59:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 59:19Jason Bateman?

  That sounds pretty, pretty good.

• 59:21Speaker 03

  Pretty good.

• 59:23Sean Hayes?

  Is everything OK, Jay?

• 59:24Will Arnett?

  Jay, are you OK?

• 59:25Jason Bateman?

  I'm hearing something in the other room. It's probably the Alexa chirping off.

• 59:34Will Arnett?

  Jason just get attacked by a Roomba. Electronics are revolting.

• 59:41Jason Bateman?

  Did you, um, is it true that the scripts are really secretive when you're doing White Lotus? Like, you're not allowed to, like, talk about them? It's like doing Star Wars? Uh, is that, did you have a problem with that?

• 59:53Speaker 03

  I didn't have a problem with it, but yeah, I mean, you're not really, you're, you're, you're not supposed to. Cause he writes all of them. So you get all of them. You, you've read all of the episodes before you.

• 1:00:02Sean Hayes?

  Wow, that's so cool.

• 1:00:03Will Arnett?

  He being Mike White.

• 1:00:04Sean Hayes?

  Mike White.

• 1:00:05Jason Bateman?

  Right, but is there like, there's, so there's a big, there's a big secret you can't say on these shows, right? It's about somebody that dies, right? And that, that's the thing they don't. To, to, to anyone, to the, like, like, what is, what are they, they're trying to keep it secret and locked down. Because at the center of each one of these seasons is the reveal.

• 1:00:23Sean Hayes?

  It's like a murder.

• 1:00:24Jason Bateman?

  Right? The murder mystery.

• 1:00:26Will Arnett?

  The murder.

• 1:00:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I didn't read other people's lines and other people's, I didn't even know.

• 1:00:32Jason Bateman?

  Wait, you're not, you're not, you're not given the pages that you're not on?

• 1:00:35Will Arnett?

  No, she's giving them.

• 1:00:36Speaker 03

  You are.

• 1:00:36Jason Bateman?

  Oh, you are, okay.

• 1:00:37Will Arnett?

  Oh, she's giving them. Don't worry.

• 1:00:38Jason Bateman?

  But no, cause I've heard, I've heard of productions like that. You're only given the scenes that you're in.

• 1:00:42Speaker 03

  I just go bullshit, bullshit, my line.

• 1:00:45Sean Hayes?

  Right.

• 1:00:46Speaker 03

  Remember?

• 1:00:47Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:47Speaker 03

  No, I, I didn't read, my season was different, or maybe slightly different because, or maybe it wasn't different. I don't know the secrecy, but I don't, yeah, I actually like, I read the scripts, obviously, but I, I was so focused on my.

• 1:01:03Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 1:01:03Speaker 03

  You know, storyline that I was, I didn't, I didn't even really know what was going on in the rest of the show at all. But I will say, I just was, uh, with Sandra Bernhardt, who's gonna be on the next season.

• 1:01:17Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 1:01:17Speaker 03

  And, um, and I was hanging out with her last week and I was, and I was like, did you get all the scripts? And she was like, yeah. And I was, and just, nothing.

• 1:01:27Will Arnett?

  Tight, right?

• 1:01:27Speaker 03

  And I didn't care. I'm not like trying to get the secret out of her, but like, she had that, that White Lotus look in her eye.

• 1:01:34Sean Hayes?

  Sandra Bernhardt. You know it well.

• 1:01:36Jason Bateman?

  Did you guys all see King of Comedy way back in the day?

• 1:01:39Speaker 03

  Of course. One of my all time favorite movies.

• 1:01:42Sean Hayes?

  I love that movie.

• 1:01:42Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:43Sean Hayes?

  Um, Aubrey, what do you have, what do you have coming up that you're super excited about? Cause I know you got a lot of projects going on.

• 1:01:50Speaker 03

  Oh, well, the main thing that I believe, and I believe this is like dropping the day that this comes out, which is today.

• 1:01:58Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:59Speaker 03

  Which is Kevin, my new animated series that I co-created and starred in and produced on Amazon Prime.

• 1:02:06Jason Bateman?

  On Prime Video. Oh, great.

• 1:02:08Speaker 03

  Prime Video, excuse me.

• 1:02:09Jason Bateman?

  And, and, and let's tell our listeners what that is about, this show Kevin.

• 1:02:14Speaker 03

  So Kevin, um... Your voice is so...

• 1:02:17Jason Bateman?

  It's a lovely title. What if, who is Kevin?

• 1:02:21Speaker 03

  Oh, God. Kevin is a cartoon based on a real, true story that was about my actual cat that I shared with Joe Wenger when we lived in Astoria, Queens. At the time that we were talking about Will, all the, that UCB era. And we had a cat named Kevin, who was an alley cat. We actually had two cats, Kevin and Howard. They were brothers. But this Kevin survived longer, so the show's about Kevin. But the show is basically about a couple that is living in Queens, based on me and Joe, that break up.

• 1:03:01Speaker 03

  And they have to tell their cat, because in the show, animals and humans interact. And they tell Kevin, like, "We're breaking up, so who are you going with, me or him?" And Kevin's like, "You know what? I'm not going with either of you. I don't want to be with you, I don't want to be with you, I want to go out on my own and be with the single cats. And I want to play the field." So Kevin goes and lives at a shelter with all the other single cats. And they kind of, they date owners and see and decide, you know, negotiate with humans and decide, "Maybe I'll live with this guy, I don't know."

• 1:03:34Jason Bateman?

  And who's, who's playing Kevin?

• 1:03:37Speaker 03

  Kevin is voiced by Jason Schwartzman.

• 1:03:39Jason Bateman?

  Nice.

• 1:03:40Speaker 03

  Who's so funny, because Kevin's this kind of like neurotic cat. He's got a... Really messed up butthole that he's fixated on. Constantly talking about his weird butthole in therapy.

• 1:03:56Speaker 03

  And he's just got a lot of like interesting.

• 1:03:58Will Arnett?

  Grow up.

• 1:03:58Jason Bateman?

  Jason, Jason, Jason, Jason wrote the music. Jason wrote the music for the show too.

• 1:04:03Speaker 03

  Jason wrote the theme song, which is so fucking catchy.

• 1:04:07Jason Bateman?

  You know, Jason's a killer drummer. Yeah. He's a crazy good drummer.

• 1:04:10Speaker 03

  He's so talented.

• 1:04:12Jason Bateman?

  Yes, he is.

• 1:04:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, he wrote the theme song. It's awesome. It has this like really like, yeah, early 2000s like indie rock vibe. And then the cast is just insane. It's like John Waters plays Armando the cat, who's this kind of

• 1:04:27Jason Bateman?

  That's great. Wow.

• 1:04:28Speaker 03

  snobby Persian cat.

• 1:04:31Speaker 03

  Queen that lives in Queens. Whoopi Goldberg plays a hairless freak cat.

• 1:04:39Speaker 03

  Amy Sedaris plays like a little yappy dog that's bossing everybody around.

• 1:04:46Speaker 03

  I play a human, among other things. I play a drunk spider and different kinds of characters.

• 1:04:52Jason Bateman?

  That's great. But you didn't have to play two or three characters, you know, you didn't run out of people you could have gone to. I mean, you got, you got Will, who's done quite a bit of voice work. Sean's done some, I've done some.

• 1:05:05Speaker 03

  We can't afford it.

• 1:05:05Jason Bateman?

  If you ever get tired of playing multiple characters, you know, just saying.

• 1:05:09Speaker 03

  I will.

• 1:05:10Will Arnett?

  That is a really good cast.

• 1:05:12Speaker 03

  Isn't it? It's fucking stacked. And the guest stars are amazing. The whole, the show's really, really funny. We've been working on it for, since before the pandemic, you know, animation takes so long.

• 1:05:21Will Arnett?

  So long.

• 1:05:22Speaker 03

  And it's, it's really funny. I'm so proud of it. I think people are gonna love it.

• 1:05:26Will Arnett?

  Schwartzman used to do, he used to do a show, a weekly show on Sirius XM U.

• 1:05:33Will Arnett?

  Where he'd play all sorts of like, you know.

• 1:05:36Jason Bateman?

  Deep cuts.

• 1:05:37Will Arnett?

  Yeah, deep, independent music cuts. And it was, it was so good. I used to listen to it every week. I'm such a fan of his in every way.

• 1:05:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, his taste in music is so.

• 1:05:47Will Arnett?

  Really good.

• 1:05:48Speaker 03

  So good.

• 1:05:49Will Arnett?

  Yeah, really, really good.

• 1:05:49Jason Bateman?

  I wonder if he, is he, he's not, I think he used to be in a band back in the day.

• 1:05:54Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:54Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:54Will Arnett?

  Wait.

• 1:05:55Speaker 03

  Fans of playing.

• 1:05:55Jason Bateman?

  He's not, he's not like in a dad band now.

• 1:05:57Will Arnett?

  His band wrote the theme song to Orange County. Isn't that right?

• 1:06:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:06:01Jason Bateman?

  Oh, that show.

• 1:06:02Will Arnett?

  That show, Orange County?

• 1:06:03Speaker 03

  California.

• 1:06:04Will Arnett?

  Yes.

• 1:06:04Jason Bateman?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:06:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:06:07Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. Wait, wasn't that on while we were doing Arrested Development?

• 1:06:09Will Arnett?

  It sure was.

• 1:06:10Jason Bateman?

  I was ready for the same time, yeah.

• 1:06:11Will Arnett?

  It sure was.

• 1:06:12Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, I wonder if he's like in a dad band right now? How great would that be?

• 1:06:16Sean Hayes?

  That is cool.

• 1:06:17Will Arnett?

  Well, don't put him in that. He can be, doesn't have to be a dad.

• 1:06:21Jason Bateman?

  Well, but he's a dad.

• 1:06:22Will Arnett?

  Okay, but that doesn't need to be his identity, man.

• 1:06:24Jason Bateman?

  No, it doesn't need to be. It could be his little side gig.

• 1:06:29Jason Bateman?

  Well, listen, Aubrey, we hit it. We did it.

• 1:06:32Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:06:33Jason Bateman?

  We're two minutes past our time already. I mean, you're amazing.

• 1:06:38Will Arnett?

  Aubrey, you're such a delight.

• 1:06:39Jason Bateman?

  Firing on all cylinders. Congratulations on the incredible news. That is awesome.

• 1:06:45Sean Hayes?

  Really cool.

• 1:06:45Jason Bateman?

  Really, really awesome.

• 1:06:46Sean Hayes?

  Very exciting.

• 1:06:47Speaker 03

  Thank you, guys.

• 1:06:48Jason Bateman?

  And the birth of your new show today as well.

• 1:06:52Will Arnett?

  Good one. Good one.

• 1:06:54Jason Bateman?

  So, just, you know, celebrations all around.

• 1:07:01Jason Bateman?

  Thank you for doing this.

• 1:07:02Sean Hayes?

  Thank you, honey.

• 1:07:03Jason Bateman?

  For birthing this episode today.

• 1:07:05Will Arnett?

  Fucking too much.

• 1:07:05Sean Hayes?

  Good to see you.

• 1:07:06Jason Bateman?

  Too much?

• 1:07:06Will Arnett?

  That was too much.

• 1:07:07Jason Bateman?

  We'll trim that later. Great to see you again, Aubrey.

• 1:07:10Will Arnett?

  Plaza, love you so much.

• 1:07:13Speaker 03

  Love you too.

• 1:07:14Will Arnett?

  Yeah, just so happy for you. You're the best.

• 1:07:16Jason Bateman?

  You're the best, huh?

• 1:07:18Will Arnett?

  You're the best.

• 1:07:18Speaker 03

  I was just looking at you.

• 1:07:19Jason Bateman?

  You take care of yourself.

• 1:07:20Speaker 03

  All right.

• 1:07:21Jason Bateman?

  You hear me?

• 1:07:21Will Arnett?

  We're gonna watch Kevin. We're gonna watch Kevin on Amazon Prime starting today. I'm logging on right now. Oh, the reviews are in. Meow, says the mirror.

• 1:07:33Jason Bateman?

  Kitty likes to scratch, says the post.

• 1:07:35Sean Hayes?

  It's the perfect show.

• 1:07:37Will Arnett?

  There we go.

• 1:07:38Speaker 03

  Don't ruin it for me.

• 1:07:39Will Arnett?

  Okay, you're right. We're gonna, we love it. We love it. We love you.

• 1:07:42Jason Bateman?

  Thank you. Enjoy your day.

• 1:07:44Sean Hayes?

  Bye, honey.

• 1:07:45Speaker 03

  All right, goodbye.

• 1:07:45Jason Bateman?

  See you down the road.

• 1:07:46Will Arnett?

  Bye, Plaza.

• 1:07:47Jason Bateman?

  Bye, yeah.

• 1:07:48Speaker 03

  Bye.

• 1:07:51Jason Bateman?

  There she goes, Aubrey Plaza.

• 1:07:54Sean Hayes?

  There she came and there she went. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What a pleasure. What a pleasure.

• 1:07:57Jason Bateman?

  She's, I love her particular talent and taste and style.

• 1:08:03Sean Hayes?

  She's real cool, as the kids say.

• 1:08:05Will Arnett?

  She's real cool.

• 1:08:07Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. Well, she just does something that I think a lot of actors are not really comfortable doing, which is, you know, like, I don't know.

• 1:08:16Sean Hayes?

  Believing that they're enough.

• 1:08:17Jason Bateman?

  Exactly, yeah. And that they're not screaming their performance at you, you know?

• 1:08:22Will Arnett?

  Yeah. I mean, she has, she's just, she has so much. I don't know, again, just sort of facility with all of it. It's amazing. And that, honestly, I mean, I always, I've always been a fan and sort of biased. But then when I, last year when I saw that Emily the Criminal, it was just, it was like another layer, like another really rich, heavy duty layer. I was like, wow, this kid, I'm not, not kid, that sounds almost, you know, this, this person is just got it all.

• 1:08:51Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:52Will Arnett?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:53Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:54Will Arnett?

  You know?

• 1:08:55Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:55Will Arnett?

  And then I think about, and then I look at JB and I'm like, what is, what's missing? You know, what's, how could he still go?

• 1:09:01Jason Bateman?

  What a mystery.

• 1:09:02Will Arnett?

  How is he? Cause he's just so.

• 1:09:04Jason Bateman?

  He's an enigma.

• 1:09:05Will Arnett?

  An enigma. Well, no, it's not your ability. I guess as a talent, you're great. You've got so much talent, but as a person, you're like, you have the personality of a Waymo driver. You know what I mean?

• 1:09:14Jason Bateman?

  I know.

• 1:09:17Jason Bateman?

  I just leave you alone, mostly.

• 1:09:19Will Arnett?

  Yeah, I guess.

• 1:09:21Jason Bateman?

  But I'm reliable and I'll get you there on time.

• 1:09:23Will Arnett?

  I'll get you there, but then it's, but it's, it's basically nothing, right? You know what I mean? Like that's.

• 1:09:28Jason Bateman?

  It's a robot.

• 1:09:28Will Arnett?

  It's, but it's not even, like, there's nothing, like, you put your hand in, there's nothing.

• 1:09:34Jason Bateman?

  Expensive, but like, not even there.

• 1:09:37Will Arnett?

  So expensive.

• 1:09:38Jason Bateman?

  It's just a waste.

• 1:09:39Will Arnett?

  That's the other problem. You're so, you've priced yourself out. You know what I mean? You have priced yourself out. Shawty, no Shawty.

• 1:09:47Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, I have, I have a good vibe.

• 1:09:48Jason Bateman?

  Did you dig something up?

• 1:09:49Will Arnett?

  Oh, I know you do. Well, I was gonna say, um, what's this hat today? I don't know, there's something.

• 1:09:54Jason Bateman?

  What's today's hat?

• 1:09:55Sean Hayes?

  Oh, this is Glenbard West. This is my high school. It's a castle on a hill.

• 1:09:59Jason Bateman?

  Is that something that you purchased? He doesn't, you don't wear a lot of things that you buy, that you buy?

• 1:10:03Sean Hayes?

  No, they gave this to me and I wear.

• 1:10:05Will Arnett?

  Have you ever thrown out a freebie?

• 1:10:08Sean Hayes?

  I know. I was like, this is like somebody's production company.

• 1:10:11Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, see?

• 1:10:12Sean Hayes?

  I know.

• 1:10:12Jason Bateman?

  And I'll bet the sweats are.

• 1:10:15Sean Hayes?

  The sweats are the college I went to.

• 1:10:17Jason Bateman?

  Uh huh.

• 1:10:19Sean Hayes?

  The sweats are the college, the hat's the high school, and this is somebody's company. I don't know what it is.

• 1:10:26Sean Hayes?

  That is pretty crazy, isn't it? I didn't realize until now.

• 1:10:30Will Arnett?

  It's so good. He's the greatest.

• 1:10:31Jason Bateman?

  Well, maybe one of these days you ought to get yourself out to a store and actually buy something.

• 1:10:37Will Arnett?

  Yeah, there we go.

• 1:10:46Will Arnett?

  Smartless.

• 1:10:51Will Arnett?

  Smartless is 100% organic and artisanally handcrafted by Rob Armjarf, Bennett Barbaco, and Michael Grant Terry.

• 1:11:04Will Arnett?

  Smartless.

• 1:11:07Speaker 04

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• 1:11:23Sean Hayes?

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