Bonus #167 - Live Call Show Vol. 37 [PATREON PREVIEW]

Patreon preview. Unlock full episode at https://www.patreon.com/c/stavvysworld The boys are back with another live call show!! Stav and Eldy talk directly to our beautiful Patreon members, helping callers including a guy whose mom shares too much information about her dating life, an aspiring startup owner who wants to baby-trap his mid, rich, crazy girlfriend, and a guy whose girlfriend thinks his and his best friend's texts to each other are very sus. If you'd like to be a part of future live call episodes, subscribe at www.patreon.com/stavvysworld to get access to the Stavvy's World Discord channel where these live calls are taken. ☎️ Have a question for a regular episode? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice! 🎟️ See Stavvy live on the Dreamboat Tour 🛥️💕!!! https://stavvy.biz/ for tickets ‼️ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  This podcast is supported by Nurtec ODT, Remedy Pant. We know you didn't ask for an interruption, but migraine doesn't wait for the right moment to interrupt either. It just barges in, takes your time, and throws everything off. So when migraine takes your time, take Nurtec. It's for the acute treatment of migraine with or without aura in adults. Nurtec can provide pain relief in two hours, which can last up to two days. Ask your healthcare provider if Nurtec is right for you, because your time is for you, not migraine. Don't take if allergic to Nurtec ODT. Allergic reactions can occur even days after use. Get help right away for trouble breathing, rash, swelling of face, mouth, tongue, or throat. High blood pressure and Raynaud's syndrome can occur. Get help for high blood pressure, numbness, coolness, pain,

• 0:45Speaker 00

  or color changes in fingers and toes. Common side effect is nausea. For full prescribing information, call 1-833-4-NURTEC or visit Nurtec.com. All right, back to your podcast, playlist, or whatever's keeping you going today.

• 1:02Speaker 01

  At Lowe's, this Veterans Day and every day, military members, veterans, and their spouses get automatic Milo's Rewards Silver Status benefits. Plus, 10% off eligible purchases with no annual limit. It's one way we honor and give back to those who have served and still do. Learn more and verify now at Lowe's.com/military. 10% discount can't be combined with another offer. Exclusions, terms, and conditions apply. Loyalty program subject to terms and conditions. Details at Lowe's.com/terms. Subject to change.

• 1:31Speaker 02

  My mom is a complicated person that tends to push people away. Over the last few years, that has resulted in her mostly like just being either unto herself or like having issues with a lot of folks in the family. Kind of myself excluded. Granted, we've been like a little up and down throughout that period as well. So like delicate relationship, sort of. In some ways, good, but in other ways, yeah, challenging. Recently, after a few years dating hiatus, she has gotten back out there, which is great for her.

• 2:10Speaker 02

  Like, I guess I support that, cool with it, not worried about it, whatever. But she doesn't have like a lot of people to talk to about it. So I feel like she's trying to treat me as one of her, one of her gals, I guess. I don't know, like, she's filling me in on just way too much details. You know, she's, she's telling me like, oh yeah, I was like staying at his place or whatever. And I'm like, I don't care. I just don't need to know, kind of a thing, or like.

• 2:33Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right.

• 2:33Speaker 02

  Just saying all sorts of crazy shit, like about how she's a blonde bomb, blonde bombshell and all these men want to sleep with her, or like, um, how she's like, these men are drinking her with their eyes.

• 2:47Stavros Halkias?

  No.

• 2:48Speaker 02

  She was on the back of this dude's motorcycle and she sent me a video where she's like, rubbing his shoulders while he's driving, but he, then she pans down and he's like groping her thigh. I'm just like, I don't need to see this shit. Uh, I don't care that that's what you're up to, kind of a thing. So like my predicament, I would like to not be in the know about this stuff.

• 3:08Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right.

• 3:10Speaker 02

  Um, the, the obvious move is just be direct about that. But my mom does not really accept pushback in any way. She kind of just cuts people out for like seemingly small things, like it would probably just spiral. I'm stuck between those two paths.

• 3:26Stavros Halkias?

  Mm hmm. Um, it's so funny. She says, you, first of all, she sounds cool. Let's get that on record. It's awesome that she's on the back of motorcycles. She's out and about. Uh, later in life, I mean, you know.

• 3:40Speaker 04

  I stayed the night and I had to crawl to the bathroom from the bedroom because he blew my shit out so good.

• 3:47Stavros Halkias?

  Now, I will say, I do have to say, everything she's shared with you has been pretty much on the line of acceptable so far. First, except for the like, the video of him hold it grabbing her thigh. Everything else, I'm like, and look, drinking in with eyes is like, she's just a very powerful wordsmith.

• 4:10Speaker 04

  That's, that, that phrase in particular to me, sounds worse than even if I heard like a sexual detail from a parent or something.

• 4:18Stavros Halkias?

  It's, she's, yeah, her greatest crime is too potent language. Just having too strong a pen.

• 4:25Speaker 02

  But look. That's the one that floats through my mind.

• 4:29Stavros Halkias?

  Tough, I'm not gonna lie to you. But I have to also give her credit because so far, everything could be on like CBS. She hasn't even gotten to like the HBO level of like, I was, I was expecting when they started like Sex and the City, you're at the brunch table, she's Samantha type shit. But it has been kind of innuendo-ish to the point where part of me feels like you have to draw the line of like, look, I don't want to see a guy groping your thighs. But I also think there's a little room for, there's a little room for you growing up a little bit too. It's like, look, your mom spent the night at a guy's house, fucking grow up. You know what I mean?

• 5:12Stavros Halkias?

  She didn't say, I sucked his cock in his fuck, in his, on the bat, in the fuck, in his Lincoln on the way to his fucking house. Like, yeah, she's dating, whatever. I do think there's a little bit of you having to, this feels to me like a classic compromise situation. Where it's like, look, your mom is like this, you know it, she's difficult. You're gonna have to be a little more uncomfortable than you'd like. But I also don't think you need to be like, and, and I don't think this needs to be a discussion. This should be more of like a learned thing like, ma, hit her with a TMI from time to time. But stay in the, stay in the like, even when you, I don't think, I think the solution is not a direct, you're right. Your mom sounds like a good kind of person.

• 5:53Stavros Halkias?

  If you, if you sat her down and made it feel dramatic, she would then up the ante and be like, oh, if you feel this way, maybe I just won't talk to you at all, or some shit like that. So I think the solution here is course correct while it's happening, right? If she's like, ma, if she says something like drinks them, I'd be like, ma. That feels a little too much. Why don't you just say you met a lot of guys at sing- at like, at, you know, there was a lot of guys checking you out at the singles event or whatever. Like, I think that's the answer here is like, it's like, oh, I'm glad you're having fun, but I don't want to see another guy. I don't want to see a guy groping you. You know what I mean? Like, how about next time, just send me a video of the motorcycle? Or you know what I mean?

• 6:33Stavros Halkias?

  Like, that's how I guess I would approach it if your mom is the kind of person that you can't be super direct with for fear of alienation.

• 6:40Speaker 04

  Do you ever push back at all when she tells you any of this shit? That just makes you like recoil kind of, or are you like, oh, ma, come on, making me fucking sick, you whore?

• 6:53Speaker 02

  The, the play is usually I just don't respond, but then after a while that turns into like a, fine, I guess I just won't share anything.

• 7:00Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 7:01Speaker 02

  Like, just kind of out of nowhere. And I'm like, oh shit, okay, now she's bent out about that. And she, if I, if I try to address it, she has a way of just kind of dragging shit into deeper and deeper water.

• 7:12Stavros Halkias?

  But here's the thing, I will say this though, you can't just ignore it. Because by the way, probab- a, a little bit of tough realization here is like, it's not a coincidence that you're the one guy she still fucking talks to. Because you're the one who just lets her do whatever the fuck she wants, right? So it's like, I think you have to have a medium of, you gotta call her out on some of this shit and you gotta take it, like, again, you can compromise a little bit, you can let her go off every once in a while, as long as she's not being fucking gross. But I think you need to address some of this shit because you're not really having a real dialogue with your mom. You're just the one person who won't push back on her at all.

• 7:52Stavros Halkias?

  Whereas I think you need to, if you want to have a real sort of fruitful relationship with her, that you get something out of too, it's making it clear when your needs are, are sort of not met, or in this case, like, you know. Your boundaries are being fucking pushed past of like what you do and don't want to hear. I just don't think it has to be like, I just don't think it has to be like dramatic. I think it can be as simple as like when it's happening, be like, mom, I don't want to hear that. Yeah. I don't want to hear that, but tell me how the date, you know what I mean? Like, oh, okay, it's great that you're on the road, I don't want to hear that, but like, what's he into? How did you feel about the connection, right? Like redirect the gross shit into shit you are comfortable about hearing is how I would handle it.

• 8:37Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 8:38Speaker 02

  Yeah, I, I think that makes sense. Like the redirection seems like a good play because it's not to, I guess, just like totally pushing back.

• 8:47Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, you know what?

• 8:47Speaker 02

  Re-steers it to.

• 8:49Stavros Halkias?

  You know what it was? You know what this reminds me of, Eldis? We, me and Eldis were both writing tutors in our, in our college writing centers. When you saw someone with really shitty writing, you would do, it was, the, the thing was called praise? Question polish, right? So your mom hits you with something fucking gross, right? She's like, she's like, you know, you know, we were, uh, let's, let's just take the spending the night thing, which you don't want to hear about. You're like, well, I'm glad the date went well. I don't need to know that you spent the night and that he put you through the fucking mattress. You know, maybe next time, just tell me about what he does for work. What does he do for work, by the way? You know what I mean? Like just that, where it's like, especially when your mom is so difficult, hit her with a little, you know,

• 9:31Stavros Halkias?

  praise to get the ego going, put the thing you didn't like and then redirect. I think, yeah, college, college writing tutor kind of taught us something that also helps with sexually adventurous mothers in their old age. Yeah.

• 9:48Speaker 02

  And I think to go on the record, it's not that I'm upset that she's staying over with these guys or whatever. Again, it's just the, I don't want to hear about it kind of a thing.

• 9:57Stavros Halkias?

  Right.

• 9:57Speaker 02

  But like.

• 9:58Stavros Halkias?

  No, I know you're not, I know you're not mad that she's getting dick down, but also, but that's all I'm saying is like, that's why it's like, hey, glad the date went well. You don't gotta let me know you spent the night, but I, I'm interested to hear more about this guy. That's probably how you want to do it.

• 10:15Speaker 04

  I do feel for you too, because I agree with what you said earlier, stuff like, yeah, I hate when people are like, oh, my parents fucking, that's disgusting. Like, once you are a certain age, it's like, yeah, whatever, you know?

• 10:26Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 10:27Speaker 04

  Old people still want to fuck too, who cares?

• 10:29Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 10:30Speaker 04

  But at the same time, this is, this sounds like a thing where it's like, sometimes you just meet someone old, like, your mom's like, still going on so many dates and shit, like, there's a, it's like, there's a level of like, boy craziness, that's like,

• 10:42Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 10:42Speaker 04

  just a little too, like,

• 10:44Stavros Halkias?

  Especially if she's just, he said he took a hiatus, so she's back in there.

• 10:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 10:48Stavros Halkias?

  It's like, anytime someone's back doing something for the first time, like, even if it was a diet, you'd hear about keto, you'd be like, shut the fuck up.

• 10:55Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 10:56Stavros Halkias?

  To her, it happens to be like, you know, going on, getting on motorcycles, she feels young again. She's probably alienated her fucking friends, so all she has is you to talk about how she feels young again.

• 11:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 11:06Stavros Halkias?

  And that's another, that's another broader problem, by the way. You might want to be like, so why don't, you know, who else do you talk to about this? It's like, you've, you've recognized that your mom pushes people away. A long-term project might, you know, might be getting other people in her life, or getting her to examine that. But that's, you know, that's much more, that's much more difficult, I would say.

• 11:27Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 11:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's the, that's the complicated problem behind the relatively simple problem of just

• 11:35Speaker 02

  not wanting to hear the details.

• 11:36Stavros Halkias?

  And why do you think, like, what, what does she, what does she had falling outs about?

• 11:42Speaker 02

  Um, I don't know, kind of like, the, the duration of my life, like, there's been friends that she's super close with for a bit, and then they have a big falling out, or like, um, I mean, just, I don't know, a handful, not a ton, but a handful of men floating through, um, I mean, a stepdad for like 16 years, kind of like all these pieces, and it always inevitably ends with her being like, oh, I feel like I have nobody, but it's kind of because she like, Pushes everyone away.

• 12:10Stavros Halkias?

  Right, right, right.

• 12:12Speaker 02

  She can't lose an argument, even if she's like objectively wrong.

• 12:16Stavros Halkias?

  Um.

• 12:17Speaker 02

  And eventually people just get sick of that.

• 12:19Stavros Halkias?

  Of course.

• 12:20Speaker 02

  And then she'll end up cutting them out if they say anything.

• 12:24Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 12:24Speaker 02

  I've kind of like, uh, gone soft with it and just like never really said any, I've never pushed back too hard because I know she has that tendency. But also, I don't know, I guess like I'm her oldest child. I feel like she treats me a little bit different. So like, she's also like less willing to kind of cut me off than than others, I feel like.

• 12:45Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, and listen.

• 12:46Speaker 02

  It's complicated.

• 12:47Stavros Halkias?

  I would say definitely complicated, but I would also say it's a little bit your, and again, you don't have to fucking raise your parents. Don't do anything that feels like too much. The number one issue here, like I said, should be just, just politely redirect the conversations where you want them to go. But I do think you kind of owe it to yourself and also her to push back from time to time, to be the one that's like, no, don't, you know, don't behave that way. Or even if she like retells you a time where, where she was wrong, you know, have those conversations about like, well, you kind of need to, you always want to win an argument, even if you're wrong, like, and I know that's hard. And I'm just saying that as somebody who has been trying to have those conversations with his parents

• 13:32Stavros Halkias?

  about shit that they don't understand. And I will tell you, it feels like hitting your fucking head up against the wall. But sometimes you see like, just a little glimmer of understanding. Like, you won't make a lot of progress, I'll be honest with you. But it's more for you that you're the kind of person that doesn't allow them to live in their fantasy. Right? That you're like, hey, when you're around me, we're going to be honest. Right? And, you know, let's just, I would just say that's a long-term note for anybody with a problematic in certain ways, parent that they want to keep in their life. I would, that's just sort of like a parting thought on top of the, you know, get her to stop talking about getting fucking, you know, having a real.

• 14:17Speaker 04

  Fingering on a motorcycle.

• 14:22Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah. Anyway.

• 14:24Speaker 02

  Awesome. Well, I appreciate the insight, fellas. Thanks for chatting.

• 14:28Stavros Halkias?

  You got it, big dog. Good luck with your mom. Hope she finds stepdad number two any day now.

• 14:36Speaker 02

  All right. Thanks, guys.

• 14:37Speaker 04

  And see Albanian lap hog.

• 14:40Stavros Halkias?

  Just a fan. That's all. His mom does sound pretty fun, though.

• 14:44Speaker 04

  She does sound awesome.

• 14:45Stavros Halkias?

  If you're, I bet, if you're a 60-year-old man, a single man in that town, she's gotta be pick of the litter, dude.

• 14:53Speaker 04

  Yeah. She sounds pretty cool. She's fucking staying in the night.

• 14:57Stavros Halkias?

  Somebody get my eyes a nice straw. I wouldn't, I wouldn't mind a sip. Wouldn't mind a sip of his mom, see what we're working with over there.

• 15:04Speaker 04

  That is, that, that is like, yeah, it's like, it's like a certain boy cra- it's like you don't want to hear about your, every single first date that your friend has, or every like first or second date. Yeah, it's like, all right, mom, come on.

• 15:17Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I mean.

• 15:18Speaker 04

  Go, go get some dick.

• 15:19Stavros Halkias?

  You do, well, there's a little bit where you do want to hear about it from your friends.

• 15:23Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 15:24Stavros Halkias?

  And then it gets old, but it's like, you don't want to hear about it from your mom.

• 15:27Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 15:28Stavros Halkias?

  Like, you want to hear about the important ones from your mom, the same way you don't want to tell your parents about it, like, and he's right, he, she is missing friends. She needs, like, I bet, like, I'm thinking about my mom's friends, if like, one of them was like dating, they would eat that gossip up.

• 15:45Speaker 04

  That's true.

• 15:45Stavros Halkias?

  You know, but they're not, you know, they've settled, they're all, they're all living the grandma lifestyle now.

• 15:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 15:51Stavros Halkias?

  But if one of them just happened to start dating now, they would love every detail, right?

• 15:56Speaker 04

  That's true.

• 15:57Stavros Halkias?

  If, but like, if my mom started dating, I wouldn't be like, fill me in on everything. I'd be like, the same way, I would, when, when I fill her in about someone, is when I want to be filled in, you know what I mean?

• 16:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 16:09Stavros Halkias?

  Like, oh, I'm seeing someone, I, I'll just let her know that I'm seeing someone, it's not too serious, don't get excited. Then when it gets serious enough, tell them a little bit about them.

• 16:18Speaker 04

  Exactly.

• 16:18Stavros Halkias?

  And then finally meet them when you're like, re- it's really solid, right?

• 16:22Speaker 04

  Exactly.

• 16:23Stavros Halkias?

  Anyway.

• 16:33Speaker 00

  This podcast is supported by Nurtac ODT. Remedy Pant. We know you didn't ask for an interruption, but migraine doesn't wait for the right moment to interrupt either. It just barges in, takes your time, and throws everything off. So when migraine takes your time, take Nurtac. It's for the acute treatment of migraine with or without aura in adults. Nurtac can provide pain relief in two hours, which can last up to two days. Ask your healthcare provider if Nurtac is right for you, because your time is for you, not migraine. Don't take if allergic to Nurtac ODT. Allergic reactions can occur even days after use. Get help right away for trouble breathing, rash, swelling of face, mouth, tongue, or throat. High blood pressure and Raynaud's syndrome can occur. Get help for high blood pressure, numbness, coolness,

• 17:17Speaker 00

  pain, or color changes in fingers and toes. Common side effect is nausea. For full prescribing information, call 1-833-4-NURTC or visit Nurtac.com. All right, back to your podcast, playlist, or whatever's keeping you going today.

• 17:34Speaker 05

  Hey, this is Jeff Lewis from Radio Andy. Live and uncensored, catch me talking with my friends about my latest obsessions, relationship issues, and bodily ailments. With that kind of drama that seems to follow me, you never know what's going to happen.

• 17:46Speaker 06

  You can listen to Jeff Lewis Live at home or anywhere you are. Download the SiriusXM app for over 425 channels of ad-free music, sports, entertainment, and more. Subscribe now and get three months free. Offer details apply.