Transform Energy Into Tangible Success! Feat. Ryan Serhant

Learn from the top minds who've mastered the art of transforming energy into tangible success! This Mashup is a dynamic episode that explores the pivotal role of energy in reshaping your life and future. My guests and I break down real world examples and strategic tactics on how you can change your energy and live a life you never thought possible. Ryan Serhant breaks down the transformative power of confidence and energy, offering a blueprint to gain control and exude "Big Money Energy" no matter your professional standing. Andy Frisella shared why building a culture of excellence and leadership can serve as a foundation for personal and business growth, reinforcing the importance of cultivating a strong team ethos. Dr. Gladys McGarey, at an inspiring age of 102, shares profound, age-defying wisdom, providing timeless insights on living well at any stage of life. Tom McCarthy will then take you through mastering your inner limitations, focusing on how to harness your energy to transform thoughts into impactful actions. Rob Dyrdek offers unique strategies on optimizing time management and finding joy in every aspect of life, which are essential for personal and professional fulfillment. Robin Sharma discusses the essence of becoming an everyday hero and how to align your heart, mind, health, and spirituality. John Edward explores the use of vibrational energy in understanding and shaping our perceptions and realities and will provide you with tools to manifest a future that aligns with your aspirations. This episode is not just about learning; it’s about transforming your approach to life and success through the mastery of your personal energy. Tune in to shift your paradigm and maximize your life with strategies from those who've made it to the very top of their fields! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Ed Mylett?

  I hear so many small business owners say the exact same thing. They just never have enough time in the day. Well, I measure time differently. I've compressed, condensed, heck, I've bent time. My first day is 6:00 AM to noon. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6:00 PM. And my third day, 6:00 PM to midnight. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, over a year, over five years. And my life's completely different than it would have been otherwise. And if you want to win as an entrepreneur, you have to compress your time too. And you definitely can't afford to waste it. Waiting weeks on a big bank for capital? Your best bet's to work with my friends at Cardiff. They know how to compress time for entrepreneurs. They get your business approved in minutes and funded the very same day. They're America's favorite small business lender and for good reason.

• 0:45Ed Mylett?

  Over 20 years in business, over 12 billion deployed to small business across America. Stop letting bank delays slow down your momentum. Head to cardiff.co/ed. That's cardiff.co/ed. Cardiff.co. Real growth, fast funding. Cardiff, borrow better. So, hey, guys, listen, we're all trying to get more productive. And the question is, how do you find a way to get an edge? I'm a big believer that if you're getting mentoring or you're in an environment that causes growth, a growth-based environment, that you're much more likely to grow and you're going to grow faster. And that's why I love Growth Day. Growth Day is an app that my friend Brendan Burchard has created that I'm a big fan of. Write this down, growthday.com/ed. So if you want to be more productive, by the way, he's asked me, I post videos in there every single Monday that gets your day off to the right start.

• 1:30Ed Mylett?

  He's got about $5,000, $10,000 worth of courses that are in there that come with the app. Also, some of the top influencers in the world are all posting content and they're on a regular basis, like having the Avengers of personal development and business in one app. And I'm honored that he asked me to be a part of it as well and contribute on a weekly basis, and I do. So go over there and get signed up. You're going to get a free, tuition-free voucher to go to an event with Brendan and myself and a bunch of other influencers as well. So you get a free event out of it also. So go to growthday.com/ed. That's growthday.com/ed. The third-generation Range Rover Sport is the most desirable, advanced, and dynamically capable yet. Range Rover Sport redefines sporting luxury. With an instinctive drive and engaging on-road dynamics and effortless composure,

• 2:14Ed Mylett?

  advanced cabin technology such as active noise cancellation and cabin air purification offer new levels of comfort and refinement. A purposeful cockpit-like driving position sets the tone for a focused interior that promotes exhilarating driver engagement. The award-winning Pivi Pro Infotainment is at the heart of the experience and provides intuitive control of all vehicle systems. Range Rover Sport. Design your Range Rover Sport at LandRoverUSA.com.

• 2:46Speaker 01

  This is the Ed Mylett Show.

• 2:51Ed Mylett?

  Hey, everyone. Welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Be sure to follow the Ed Mylett Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. My guest today does not really need an introduction, but I'll give him a brief one because his content's so good, I want to get right to it. But I think he's probably the biggest real estate brand in the world. He's a CEO, star of Bravo's Million Dollar Listing in New York. If you don't know his name, you know his face. If you're listening on audio, you'll know right away who he is. Ryan Serhant, welcome to the show. Thanks for being here.

• 3:23Ryan Serhant?

  Thanks for having me, man. I really appreciate it.

• 3:25Ed Mylett?

  Of all the stuff that I teach about influence, you know, optimal performance, it's this invisible thing, which is energy. And when you're around someone who's successful, and you call it magnetic energy sort of more specifically, I cannot agree with you more about this. You know when you're in the presence of it, and the absence of it makes everything so much harder in life to persuade, to attract, to accumulate. How does someone, first off, what is big money energy? And how does someone get conscious of developing it so they can transfer it to people?

• 3:58Ryan Serhant?

  Yeah, sure. If I could just backtrack for a quick second.

• 4:02Ed Mylett?

  Sure.

• 4:03Ryan Serhant?

  For anyone that doesn't know, I mean, I was born in Texas, bounced around eight times before fourth grade, grew up a little bit outside Boston, went to college upstate in New York. I was terrible at every single sport. Uh, the only thing I liked was theater. Um, in part because I, I didn't have to be myself, right? On stage, um, uh, I was not a cool kid by any means. And, you know, growing up on the East Coast is, uh, school can be tough that way. Um, uh, and so acting and learning how to act, um, gave me the opportunity to pretend to be somebody else. Uh, and I wasn't confident in my, my body. I was overweight, I had terrible acne, I wasn't that smart, you know?

• 4:45Ryan Serhant?

  Um, uh, but I knew that I liked to perform. Um, and I, I gave myself two years after college, uh, to come to New York City and try to do theater. Try to make it TV, film, whatever I could do. I didn't want to go to LAX, I didn't know anybody in the West Coast, you know, basically from the East Coast. So I went there and I completely bombed, failed. I got on a soap opera for like a split second and then they killed me off really, really, really quick. And I totally ran out of money. Um, and there's a couple of things that have always sort of driven my life. One is I'd rather regret the things I did than the things I never tried. Right? I'd rather ask out that girl and have her say no than, than live the rest of my life wondering, oh my gosh, she could have said yeah. Oh my God, what's the worst that can happen?

• 5:30Ryan Serhant?

  She gonna punch me in the face? I don't think so. Um, and if she did, that's an even better story. I asked out this chick, she punched me in the fucking face. That's crazy. What a great story. That's my third book. Um, uh, and, you know, I, I am, uh, I, I used to be, and I'm not as debilitated anymore, but I, I used to be debilitated by this fear of wasted potential. That, you know, like, I gotta go to New York and try to be an actor because if I don't do it, I'm, I, I, I, this is my only shot. I gotta do this now and I don't want to be in the cemetery one day as that guy who had he just turned a little bit more, you'd know who he is, he would have had a legacy. Um, uh, and so I totally ran out of money, got into real estate at the end of 2008. Not because I like real estate.

• 6:15Ryan Serhant?

  No way, not because I enjoy, you know, being a licensed associate Realtor. Uh, it was because I needed to pay my rent and I needed to buy food and I didn't want my parents to have to help. I didn't want anyone to feel bad for me and I didn't want to fail and have to move home. To know if I move home, I'd never come back. Um, uh, and if you can make it in New York City, like they say, you can make it anywhere, right? It's a tough, tough city, competition is intense. It's also a beautiful city, it's an intellectually curious city. And you can walk down the street every day and meet a brand new person every single day. Um, uh, uh, when I got into real estate, I realized that I, I had, uh, something, uh, I was lacking in something that a lot of the successful brokers, uh, and developers and bankers and attorneys and clients had.

• 7:00Ryan Serhant?

  And I couldn't really figure out what it was. They could walk into a room and make perfect eye contact, a great handshake, they owned the room, right? Uh, uh, they, they, they oozed success, whether they were successful or not. And I wanted to be like those people, but in my mind, yeah, I'm a failed actor. I just got my real estate license, I need to pay rent, that's not me, I can't do that. Maybe in 10, 20 years, maybe, but that's probably not in the cards for me, right? I, I, I didn't think success was something that was, was, was possible for me. And I think a lot of people end up feeling that way as well. And you kind of like write off your future, say, well, that's never gonna happen to me, right? Now, listen, you've got to be realistic too. I suck at basketball, it's not like I really wanted to be in the NBA.

• 7:45Ryan Serhant?

  And I was like, oh man, if I just try a little bit, no, it's not gonna, it's not, that's not gonna happen for me. But, you know, I chose success first, uh, career second. And I, I decided that, you know, the one thing that really separates me from everybody else in this field, not just that I'm an amateur and they're professional, not just that they're older with more experience and I'm brand new. It's that they have. Energy. They have this successful energy. They have this magnetic energy. They have an energy that attracts money and income. They have a big money energy. And what that is,

• 8:25Ryan Serhant?

  is a unique quality that every successful person embodies. And I think we've all been conditioned to think that the most people achieve success because they're either born rich, or they're educated, or they're well-connected, or they're beautiful, but it's just not true. And I, this is something, I, I, I mean, I, maybe I'm the only one, but this is what I used to think. I used to think that, hey, some people have it made. I don't. And that's okay. And I, I kinda like, accepted that. But then I realized that I don't have to accept that. I can be the person I want to be right now.

• 9:01Ed Mylett?

  Yes.

• 9:01Ryan Serhant?

  We're all on the same track running. Other people just got a little bit of a head start, and that's okay. And so, big money energy is my confidence blueprint to help people take back control and live the biggest, most fulfilling life they possibly can. Because even though you can't change all of your circumstances, that's okay. Because if you can change your energy, you can change your life.

• 9:26Ed Mylett?

  One million percent. I, I, I just want to acknowledge a couple of things on that. I think you can do all the other things, and if you don't develop this magnetic energy, it's very difficult. I mean, you have the best script in the world, the best closing in the world, the best everything, even the best product in the world. And by the way, you and I both know, you know, top producers who aren't the best closers, who aren't the best prospectors, but they have this magnetic energy about them. Couple of things. How do I develop it? One, I assume you believe you need to be intentional about it in the first place. But you also talk in the book a little bit about, you know, you said, I can become whoever I want. I write in my book about, you can just become a new character in the story of your life. Anytime you want, you could actually begin to play a character. And you say something similar about that in the book. So, do we model big money energy?

• 10:09Ed Mylett?

  Or does that make it inauthentic if we're like somebody else? Like, how do we do this?

• 10:14Ryan Serhant?

  Yeah, I, I, I, I don't think you model it, you know, um, uh, there's a big difference for me in acting, doing theater and actually presenting myself as somebody who was successful, right? And I never, there's no lying, there's no faking it. Um, it was just really believing in your core. And I'll give you an example, um, uh, you know, I, most people know me, uh, because for the last 10 years, I've been on a show called Million Dollar Listen New York on Bravo. They've either seen an episode on a plane, or their friends saw, or just reruns, whatever. Um, I got onto that show when they were looking for the top real estate agents in New York City. At the time, they were under 30, okay? I was, uh, 25, um, and they wanted the best,

• 10:58Ryan Serhant?

  the biggest, the ones who were doing hundreds of millions of dollars in sales a year. They said, come to our open casting call at the Hudson Hotel in Times Square. And I saw that, I said, all right, I'm doing a handful of rentals. That's definitely me. And so I went, I went, I was like, yeah, who are these people? They're from LA. What are they gonna know? Uh, so I went, and I don't know what came over me that day, but I just was like, you know what? Fuck it, you know, I don't have a business to speak of right now. If I get cast in a reality show about being a real estate agent, what's the worst that could happen? I suck? That is actually pretty bad, so let's not suck. But if I got onto it, it's exposure that I would never be able to pay for, right? I can't, I can't afford those types of commercials, so, so let's see what happens.

• 11:42Ryan Serhant?

  And I went into that audition, and they asked me why I was there, and I said, because I'm the greatest fucking real estate broker in the history of the world.

• 11:50Ryan Serhant?

  And, uh, and I distinctly remember them staring back at me and being like, okay, got it. Because I think the 3,000 other agents who showed up that day, remember, in New York City alone, there are 80,000 real estate agents.

• 12:06Ed Mylett?

  My gosh.

• 12:07Ryan Serhant?

  So, uh, I was one of them. Um, uh, I think a lot of people were probably mumbling and stumbling, and like, well, you know, I saw the note in this, and I sold this and this. I just laid it out in one line, super simple. Next question. Let's go. I'm busy.

• 12:22Ed Mylett?

  Can I say something, one thing I want to add in? Two things. One, the most certain person always influences the less certain person. So, one of the things you did is you brought a ton of certainty. But you just used the word busy. I think one of the ways that you have magnetic energy, guys, if you need to be creative, is be busy. Just busyness alone becomes magnetic because when you have scarcity of time, scarcity is value. And so, the less you have of it to offer people, the more valuable it is when you give it to them. So, I just want to inject that and you keep rolling.

• 12:52Ryan Serhant?

  No, that takes me directly into the next point here. You know, they asked me all these questions. Eventually, I left and I was like, wow, I just bombed that. And then they called me back and said, hey, we want to keep talking to you. So, months and months and months go by. Eventually, they say, listen, we've narrowed it down to a big group of you. And so, we're flying back to New York and we're going to follow each of you for half a day in New York City. Don't stress, we just want to see what your life is like. Show us your apartments, you know, your office, stuff like that. It's a reality show, so don't do anything crazy. To me, I said, okay, your first impression is your last impression if you are not careful. The last thing I was going to show them was my fucking apartment and my office that was like in the corner somewhere.

• 13:38Ryan Serhant?

  And, you know, appointments, like, what was I going to do? Take them on a thousand dollar a month rental appointment that I had? No way. So, I said, this is an opportunity that I have. I told them I'm the best. I believe that I can be the best. I might not be the best today by numbers, but they didn't ask me what my numbers were. They didn't ask me what my listings were. They said, why are you here? I said, I'm the best real estate agent. That's what you're looking for. So, why are you asking? And now, they're here. So, they want to see that. So, I scheduled myself a day that, you know, was as busy as one of my busiest days ever. And I would have busy days here and there, but when you're brand new in any business, you know, you have, there's your lulls over and over and over. And I wasn't about to let fate control my destiny in any way, shape, or form.

• 14:23Ryan Serhant?

  Okay, they were going to pick the day, they were going to pick the morning. No way was I going to say, well, no, that looks like a slow morning. I guess that's what they're going to see. No fucking way. But every day they pick, I'm going to give them what I told them I was, the greatest real estate agent ever. And so, I drove them around the city like a crazy mad person. I booked myself nonstop every 15 minutes. I think I got carsick halfway through. And then... Because my life is not that crazy. I was done with them like three hours early and I didn't know what to do. And so I left him in an apartment and I got back into my car and I just drove off and said, listen, I have a really, really busy day ahead of me. I don't have time to stay with you for the next couple of hours. I gotta do some personal stuff. I'm sorry. I'm sure you can understand.

• 15:08Ryan Serhant?

  If it doesn't work out, no problem.

• 15:10Ed Mylett?

  Wow.

• 15:10Ryan Serhant?

  That reached me and I left him and I, at that point, I was like, all right, 50% chance. That was the stupidest thing I've ever done. But there's a, there's another 50% chance that they're gonna look at that and they're gonna say, he just left us? Everyone else is, is dying to get on this show and this guy just left us on the side of the, please cast him now. And that's exactly what happened.

• 15:34Ed Mylett?

  I freaking love it. Like, see, I knew none of this. I'd just seen you on the show. I knew there was, I knew there was an edge to you. But guys, the busyness combined with a little bit in life of just a takeaway. I don't need this. Just a little bit, no matter when you're persuading, these are the combination, the mother of all combinations. And what I love about the book, you guys, again, it's big money energy. Is it's about magnetic energy, but it's also about building your self-confidence and it's about performing at a level. And let's just be really honest, you know, you all know Ryan, but think about what he just told you. This is not one of the top agents in New York at the time. And now, I mean, arguably the biggest real estate brand, at least in the United States that I'm aware of. And that's remarkable in a decade.

• 16:15Ed Mylett?

  And the catalyst was the things that he's telling you. So this is valuable stuff if you want to do this in your, in your own life. You talk a lot, you said something in the book that was interesting to me about like, dropping your past or how'd you word it? It was like shed your past.

• 16:30Ryan Serhant?

  Don't let your past infect your present.

• 16:33Ed Mylett?

  Damn.

• 16:34Ryan Serhant?

  My people carry that baggage and that's what I was doing when I came to New York. Like I had, you know, I had middle school, high school, college bullshit like on my shoulders. I had, you know, self-esteem issues, which then turned into overeating issues, which then made me feel bad about myself, which then turned into self-esteem issues, which then made me feel even worse, which then turned into overeating, you know, so on and so forth.

• 17:02Ryan Serhant?

  And, and I would carry that into my future and it's like, just like a. What I realized is you don't, you don't do that. You look at life like the weather, right? There are going to be storms and there are going to be sunny skies. But guess what? Can't rain all the time and it's not gonna. So you can walk around and talk about how much it rained last week over and over and over and over and over. Or when it rains, fucking get out of the rain or you enjoy the shit out of it because sometimes it's okay to get wet. And when it's sunny, it's awesome. You were ready for it.

• 17:40Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 17:41Ryan Serhant?

  And you take that into the future.

• 17:44Ed Mylett?

  You really do that, huh? You really think that way? Yeah, you really think that way now? And speaking of rain, it just made me think about something because COVID's rained on a lot of people's parties.

• 17:55Ryan Serhant?

  Yeah, yeah, for sure.

• 17:57Ed Mylett?

  People are like, hey, man, this sounds really good. I need to develop this energy. But man, I'm starting over right now. Like, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm that dude, you know, that shows up to the casting call of Life right now and it's been raining a long time.

• 18:10Ryan Serhant?

  Yeah, listen, I, I mean, that's, that's what I'm here for right now. Like, I'll, I'll be very clear and very blunt. And I think my mom tells me I'm, I'm too honest sometimes. I, I, I'm not an author. Like, yes, I wrote this book because it kind of poured out of me. But I'm not a coach. I'm not a guru in any way. I, I am a real estate broker in New York City. I run a real estate firm. I'm addicted to deals and I want to sell more real estate than anyone ever, ever, ever. That is my, that is my, that's what I do. And I was talking to people during quarantine who are trying to get into the sales business or trying to start a business and they were being fired or they were being

• 18:52Ryan Serhant?

  let go or they were really, really, really terrified. And that's who this, this book is for. Because I knew exactly how they felt. I know exactly what it's like to have your credit card declined at a grocery store, right? I was there. I, I know exactly what it was like to hold back tears sitting on the subway when I was in my early twenties because I had no idea what the fuck I was gonna do. And, and, and, and failing was just not an option for me. It just wasn't because I knew even then. Like shit, it's still not as bad as it could be. So what? I need more money? So does everybody. Like, I'm not the only one. At least I'm in New York City. At least I'm here, I'm on a subway. I've got shoes, I've got pants, I've got clothes.

• 19:36Ryan Serhant?

  And I started making everything so relative. And so what I did is I sat down. Uh, and I was taught to do this back when I would have panic attacks a lot when I was a little kid. Uh, and I made two, and I made two lists on a piece of paper. Right? We don't write enough with our hands. Everyone's types are, our thumbs are gonna fall off one day. So I got a pen and a paper, and on the left-hand side of the paper, I wrote down everything that I hate. Everything that sucks, everything that was making me sad, everything that was making me depressed, all the anxiety, all the reasons. Everything I wrote down. And then on the right side of the paper, after I drew that big line, I wrote down everything that's good. All the good things. As simple as breakfast was good. It isn't sunny out, that's nice, glad it wasn't raining. Um, uh, oh yeah, no, I did that deal.

• 20:21Ryan Serhant?

  Okay, that was good. And then this, and then this, oh, and my parent, and ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. And before you know it, you breathe. And the right side of the paper is so much longer than the left side. Because good will always outweigh evil. Um, if you do the exercise right. And, uh, and I talked to a lot of people who've had a really, really hard time in 2020. Uh, and I've asked them to do that exercise. And they always take a moment, they come back and say, holy shit. I, I didn't realize how much good I have going on right now. And the three things that make me really, really nervous, yeah, they're super big. Yeah, I lost her or him. Yeah, this is fucked up, but holy shit. Do I have an amazing opportunity in front of me right now?

• 21:04Ryan Serhant?

  Um, uh, and a big part of finding that big money energy to allow yourself to win as much as you want to, right? You gotta have that want, is to be an opportunist, I'm sorry, to be an opportunist. You know, you have to have the power to make your own magic. You know, you can't wait for someone else to do it. I mean, my career really took off when I realized I didn't need anyone to provide me with an opportunity. Opportunities are everywhere. If you're comfortable with being uncomfortable. Like I still to this, I've been in the business for 12 years. I do, uh, you know, last year was a tough year for real estate in New York, but in 2019, um, uh, we did 1.4 billion in sales.

• 21:47Ryan Serhant?

  I, I to this day, every day, I cold email billionaires.

• 21:52Ed Mylett?

  Usually.

• 21:53Ryan Serhant?

  It's part of, it's part of my job. I cannot not do it because, uh, uh, people of means either take direct referrals from friends or family, or they just don't have the time to think about it and they don't have the time to think about me. Right. So I'm going to make sure that I'm in front of them. And I come up with new ways to reach out to 15 new people every single day. And I, I make that part of my work. That's my work. If I do that, I won.

• 22:16Ed Mylett?

  This is when you're shooting everything, no matter what you're doing it. So stay on that for a minute. This is a, this is the opposite question. Cause this is really telling about you. Most people failure gets them, right? It gets them. But the other thing is like some limited amount of success really gets a lot of people. You know this, you've watched a whole bunch of people that you've passed by. It's like they get to a certain point, maybe they've exceeded where they thought they were going to get in the very beginning, and they just stop doing the things that got them there or even increasing them. So that's very impressive to me to hear that. And I'm, I'd like to think I'm the same way. Like I'm still grinding some days harder than I did in the beginning. And there, and there's times where I go, what the hell am I doing? Right. But then I'm like, it's, I'd feel naked if I didn't do certain things. Uh, I'd have tremendous anxiety

• 23:01Ed Mylett?

  if my normal rituals I don't do every day, but there's something about you, brother, that it is different. Now I think everybody can have it, but you kept blowing through levels, right? Like another one, another, and now you're even at another one. What is that? And, and speak to that to people that right now go think that, hey, man, I'm actually didn't pretty, I'm already, I'm playing with house money. I'm ahead of where I was, so I'm going to cool it. What would you say to them?

• 23:25Ryan Serhant?

  If you can be happy by cooling it, then go for it.

• 23:32Ed Mylett?

  Right.

• 23:32Ryan Serhant?

  What I'll say is you're just leaving a lane open for somebody else. Um, uh, and if you're okay with that, then okay. Like I'm not here to tell somebody how to be happy or how not to be happy. Right? No, no one should listen to me by all means. Um, I am not a therapist, uh, uh, and I am not your parents. Right? But what I, what I, what I do think about a lot of times is not about me today. Okay. Uh, I, I work for me in the future. And I, I have a baby now. Yeah, I kind of work for her. If I'm being totally, I like it a little bit, right? Uh, my wife, sure, a little bit, but the person I care about the most is myself in 2030.

• 24:15Ryan Serhant?

  Like I think about Ryan 2030, probably an unhealthy amount. Because before I know it, I'm going to be there. Because 10 years ago, I, I wasn't on a TV show. I was hand modeling to pay my bills. Um, I was freaking out. I thought I was going to get out of real estate. I was moving home to Colorado and then my life changed in an instant. And I was just, that was, that was 10 years ago. Okay. 10 and a half, let's say. Um, so before I know it, it's going to be 2030. And I want to do everything I possibly can today to make sure that that guy's life is fucking awesome. I want him to be able to go back in time to 2021 Serhant and say, dude, you came out of that pandemic swinging. I know it was tough.

• 24:59Ryan Serhant?

  I know it was crazy. I know you blew up your life. You started your own real estate company. You wrote a book with a title called Big Money Energy, you crazy asshole. But guess what? It all worked out, right? Like that's what I'm working for. Um, and I think anyone who says, well, I did it. Okay. Limited success. Let's move on. Don't think about yourself today because you're taking a break in the present. Right? You gotta work to take a break in the future. Um, uh, and then really, really, really, really, really earn it. And if you're happy, right, then, then God love you.

• 25:32Ed Mylett?

  By the way, that's one of my favorite answers in the history of the show. Like literally, that's one of my favorite. But everyone should be thinking right now, you 2030. And don't dilute yourself into thinking you're happy now if you're really not. Now, if you are wonderful, right? But that's one of my favorite answers. Also so honest. My favorite person is me.

• 25:51Ryan Serhant?

  But it's like, listen, it's, it's, and I think that there is, for any entrepreneur out there, right, anyone who is, anyone who's listening to this, okay, is somebody who, who wants to do a little bit better in life, wants to do a little bit more, wants to make a little bit more money, right, wants to learn a little bit more. No one who's okay with the couch is listening to this podcast right now because it's just to stress the fuck out of them, okay?

• 26:16Ed Mylett?

  You're right.

• 26:16Ryan Serhant?

  So, so everyone who's, who's listening, I think, wants more, and that's exciting. Like, that's what life allows us. And it's also the future. Like, it's the 2020s. Imagine if it was the 1950s. Like, just talk to any old person, talk to your parents, your grandparents, if you're so lucky to still have them. Say, you know, what were your opportunities when you got out of school? And they're gonna give you like, three answers. Right? Like, you gotta make things relative. And we have, the problem we have now is we are overwhelmed with opportunity, and we don't know which direction to go in. So, we don't, and we don't end up picking a lane. Or we do pick a lane, and we're so obsessed with that lane, and then we're devastated when

• 27:01Ryan Serhant?

  the lane ends. We're like, oh, well, that's it. I'm not driving anymore. Lane over, lane. It's like, no. That was me acting in the, when As the World Turns killed me off on the rooftop, when my grandmother stabbed me in the heart. That's, that's real. That was a lane ending. But I didn't, like, get out of the car, call it quits, said, all right, this is what I want to do my whole life. You know what? No problem. I'm gonna take a right, and I'm gonna go find a different lane. Let me figure this out. Right? Let me, let me just figure it out.

• 27:34Ed Mylett?

  And usually, in hindsight, too, brother, like, you look back on your life, and like, some of those previous lanes you were in, sort of prepare you ironically through the new lane. Like, your acting background sure has not hurt with you being on a reality show about your real life, your presence on camera, you're able to communicate energy, transferring, right? I mean, it was all, in hindsight, if you look back, sort of leading to this road, as long as you, so to speak, walked down those roads when they were presented to you.

• 28:02Ryan Serhant?

  Dude, it is. You know, luck is when hard work meets talent, right? It's, um, uh, uh, you know, it's, it's not something that is guaranteed for everybody. But I think hard work trumps talent when talent doesn't work hard. And everything that I put into my theater training, you know, like I was in theater camp when I was, you know, in the summers and it's like the one thing I actually really, really liked doing. Uh, and then I threw it all away because I ran out of money. But then it circled back to me and I got in front of a camera and I saw all these other real estate agents who were like, oh, they're awkward and weird. And it's like, wait a minute, I know what these people want. I know what I gotta do, right? I know how to look at people.

• 28:46Ryan Serhant?

  I know how to listen to people. I know how to breathe. I know how to give them what they want. Let me see if this works.

• 28:51Ed Mylett?

  Brother, you're awesome. I hope we do something again together. Like I, I really, really enjoyed this. Guys, follow Ryan, get big money energy, buy the book and share this show. If you know anybody trying to perform better, they need to listen to what we just talked about or watch it because it's loaded with gold and tell them to get a notepad out before it begins because they're going to want to write a lot of this stuff down. So Ryan Serhant, thank you for today, brother.

• 29:15Ryan Serhant?

  All right. Thank you. I'll talk to you later.

• 29:17Ed Mylett?

  So today's a really special day for me. I get to share with you one of my best friends in the world, if not my best friend. He's one of the most influential people on the planet and he's my partner in the Arte Syndicate that we coach entrepreneurs together. And we're going to have a remarkable conversation today with Andy Frisella. Welcome, brother.

• 29:35Andy Frisella?

  Thanks, bro.

• 29:35Ed Mylett?

  What about that, like leveraging the dark side versus like chasing the dream? There's two ways people approach this. Both work.

• 29:42Andy Frisella?

  I think you gotta do both.

• 29:44Ed Mylett?

  Okay. Explain that to us.

• 29:46Andy Frisella?

  So as an entrepreneur, as someone who's wired for achievement or attempting to achieve, we are presented with lots of different energy to leverage towards our goals. And part of the, the energy is positive and part of the energy is negative. And I believe that entrepreneurship and business and, and building something is so hard that you have to learn to leverage both. And I feel like a lot of people are wired one way or the other way. And I was too, for a long time, but I was only wired for the dark. Um, yeah. So, you know, there's positive energy, right? Which I believe out of if we, from my experience, and it might be different for everybody, and it also could be just my perspective

• 30:27Andy Frisella?

  and worldview. But for me, it's like 90 10. Okay, 90% uh negative dark side energy, 10% positive. And what I'm talking about is the energy that we receive going down the path. Okay, what do we get? Well, anytime that we set out to do anything different than everybody else, bro, nobody gets it. All right. So that sets the precedent for us to get negative energy in different ways all the time. This is why a lot of people in the beginning, they're like, nobody believes in me. Nobody supports me. Everybody's, you know, making fun of me. Yeah, dude, because you're doing something completely outside of the realm of what they see as normal life. And so we're gonna face more negative energy, in my opinion, than we are positive. There's gonna be very few people that actually believe in you. There's gonna be very few people that say, yeah, you know what, Ed, I think you can do that.

• 31:13Andy Frisella?

  Most people are gonna say, dude, I think you're getting a little bit too out there. You know, they're gonna try to talk you out of it. And so I think it's necessary, and and very few people talk about it, to learn how to leverage the dark energy properly, because positive energy is great, dude, like, like, putting, having someone like you come put their arm around me and say, hey, bro, you're doing good. It's a big deal, but it's very rare. Yeah. All right. What's what's very common is everybody else saying, hey, what the like, when I say, hey, we're gonna build the next Nike level American iconic brand, people look at me like I'm full of right, even after what I've done. You know what I'm saying? And by the way, we're debt free company, and nobody gave me any money. Like, there's no company, I don't know of another company our size that is debt free.

• 31:54Andy Frisella?

  I don't know of a single one. It's crazy. When we think about these things, you know, if we're only leveraging, if we only operate with the one or two times a year that somebody who's credible comes and tells you you're great, you're gonna feel like all the time. And so I think it's necessary, especially in the hard phases, to literally learn how to leverage the dark energy, meaning.

• 32:15Ed Mylett?

  You're gonna get so much of it, leverage it.

• 32:17Andy Frisella?

  Yes.

• 32:17Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, it's great.

• 32:18Andy Frisella?

  Because it's a powerful force, and and people will judge you, and they'll say, that's not, I'm doing it to prove people right. Well, that's why you're losing, bro. You know what I'm saying? We get all kinds of negative energy at us all the time. And so what we have to learn to do is to take that in, and then. Let it come out of us in productive action.

• 32:36Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 32:36Andy Frisella?

  You know, like not, not lashing back out, not going on the internet and passive aggressively pouting about why nobody believes in you. Nobody believes in you because you haven't done anything, bro.

• 32:46Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 32:46Andy Frisella?

  And by the way, when you've done, there's just a whole bunch of more people that don't believe in you.

• 32:50Ed Mylett?

  True.

• 32:50Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 32:51Ed Mylett?

  It's true.

• 32:51Andy Frisella?

  So like, we have to learn to take these things, internalize them, see them for what they are, and then let them come out in productive action.

• 33:00Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 33:01Andy Frisella?

  And a lot of people can't do that. So what happens is the, the negative energy comes, it comes, it comes, it comes, and then it burns them the down, right? So, so we, I, I believe to get to a certain level, you have to be able to, you have to be proficient at both. Um, and

• 33:16Ed Mylett?

  And you are proficient at both. Like, by the way, this idea of leveraging energy that comes at you, I've never heard you say it that way before. But if everything in your life is going to be coming at you, that's relatively negative rejection, people screwing you, letting you down, clients that quit, haters, this idea of like, no, you know, don't pay attention to the hate. You're saying, actually pay attention to it and then flip it and leverage it. But the same time though, you and I for each other, but behind the scenes thing, you also have those people in your life that have to like expand your vision. This did not happen here. There's a LaFerrari down there.

• 33:47Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 33:48Ed Mylett?

  There's, there's a Bugatti down there that's bananas. Every car in here is bananas, right? He doesn't buy like knockoff cars, like this building's bananas, the guitars that are on the wall, the pictures, Grant's house over there, the way you design a deck. We're just sitting here like, hey dude, I'm taking this part of the couch. I'm going to put that on the bar. So you're a visionary person too. So I want you to speak to that. And then even you and I behind the scenes, I don't know, every three or four weeks you're like, hey, bro, this house in Florida, this thing there.

• 34:14Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 34:14Ed Mylett?

  We're also people that although we leverage the dark side, we're also dreaming.

• 34:19Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 34:20Ed Mylett?

  And visualizing and having someone in your life that's like, hey, think about this, think about this. What, what element of it, this didn't come together by mistake. So speak to that a little bit about having some vision as well. By the way, this is like a masterclass. We should be charging for this podcast, but that's why we have the Arte Syndicate. But, but like, talk about vision and having someone in your friendship circle that also helps you stretch that too. Don't just leverage the dark side, but the vision part of it.

• 34:44Andy Frisella?

  You have to be exposed to bigger things than what you're doing at all times, no matter who it is or what level you're at. And honestly, meeting you was one of those things for me. The first time I went to your lake house in Coeur d'Alene, like I'm over here thinking I'm doing it, right?

• 34:56Ed Mylett?

  Hmm.

• 34:57Andy Frisella?

  And I am doing it.

• 34:58Ed Mylett?

  Hmm.

• 34:58Andy Frisella?

  But then I walk into a 40,000 square foot Bro, I was just telling the guys before the show, I was like, you get off, you get off the boat and you get off the dock and imagine the, the most crazy la- uh, lake house, uh, lodge that you've ever seen in your life. And then you, you walk up to it and you realize it's the [__] guest house. You know what I'm saying? Like that's, there's levels, man. And, and, um, Wait till you see Hope Island. Yeah, I already know. The, the, uh, I think it's important to expose yourself consistently to the outcome. Um, which I think a lot of people do. I think a lot of people actually do that too much where they make it all about the stuff and what they're trying to achieve.

• 35:43Andy Frisella?

  And you can get successful like that. I was successful my first 15 years like that. Um, my first 10 years I wasn't, but you know, I made a lot of money those next five. And, um, you know, that was mainly like, what, what was I trying to build? What was I, but I don't think you can really get, I think you can only get so far on that. Cause once you start having it and once you start experiencing it. And I, this is going to sound all [__] up to everybody else, but like dude, driving any of those cars you just mentioned, that's like driving a normal car to me. You know, like I don't think of it anymore. Like I just, it's just part of my life. And, um, when I think of like, what really gets me motivated and, and in the space I need to be is really thinking about

• 36:27Andy Frisella?

  historic things now. Like what, what's the story of our company going to be when, when I die? You know what I mean? What did I actually accomplish? Who did I actually help? How did I impact families? How did I make people's lives better? How did I help people, um, discover, like I said a minute ago, that they have gifts too, and that they're here to let those gifts, uh, materialize in real life. And, you know, and then I see what's going on in the world and what's going on in the country. And so like, I continue to take on these bigger causes. Yeah, you do. Because these things, because I don't get motivated by the stuff anymore. Actually, real talk, I mean, I've told you a million times. I've said this publicly a lot. I don't give a [__] about it anymore. Yeah, anymore. Yeah, I don't. You think you have to get it? Yes.

• 37:11Andy Frisella?

  Absolutely. I had to get to that to have it to realize that it's not what. So what is the cool part of being successful is that you get a platform to leverage other people? Listen, that shit's cool as fuck. Right. All right, it's cool. I'm not sitting here trying to play it down. Material goals are very important, especially when you haven't had them yet. Because they're the things that'll keep you going during the dark times. You'll say, okay, well, this is the lifestyle I want. This is what I want to do. But once you have that lifestyle, a lot of people fall off because they don't have a bigger mission. There you go. And so what I've learned is that taking on bigger purposes that are outside of myself actually lead to not just more success, but also more fulfillment. And, um,

• 37:50Andy Frisella?

  you know, I don't have it all figured out. You know, when people, when you said like people are like, oh, well, he thinks he's got it all figured out. No, I don't have it figured out. In fact, I've got the behind me figured out, but I don't have the in front of me figured out. You think Jim's proud of you? My dad? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Did he tell you that? I mean, we have a different dynamic, you know what I'm saying? Um, but yeah, I mean, I can tell. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's not like, uh, I mean, there's been a few times for sure. You know what I mean? But we never, we were never like, like,

• 38:24Andy Frisella?

  it was just different, man. My dad raised us as realist. You know, things are either this or they're that. They're either this way or they're that way. And I'm very grateful for that because, you know, while some people would have been raised by my dad, who had very high standards and who pushed us to do, um, well, they would say, oh, that's, that's not, that's, they would resent him for that. But like how I look at it is I'm like, dude, I am so thankful I had that because now I understand reality. I'm not confused or delusional about the way things are. And the truth is, man, we can wish and we can hope and we can wish things were different, but they are what the they are. And we have to learn to operate with what is, not what we want it to be. And I think having my dad raise Sal and I both that way has been a tremendous key for, like,

• 39:08Andy Frisella?

  we're a continuation of his work. You know what I'm saying? Um, he, he.

• 39:16Andy Frisella?

  He taught us the right, you know what I'm saying? He like, yeah, and my dad was hard on us, dude. We got our asses beat when we were little. That's real, but you know what? Every time I fucking got my ass beat, you know what the truth is, Joe? I deserved it every single time, you know?

• 39:30Ed Mylett?

  He equipped the two of you for the world. And I worry a lot right now with, you know, cause I am a parent that so many parents. I mean, a lot of these kids get out of college or school, man, and they're like, oh my gosh, the world swings back. As you said earlier, and they never had any hits because their parents protected them growing up from every. Anytime there's a dispute at school, they intervened. Yeah. Any problem, they weren't starting on the baseball team. They talked to the coach.

• 39:54Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 39:54Ed Mylett?

  Right? Or switched the school or did this or wrote a letter or whatever.

• 39:57Andy Frisella?

  Wasn't that way.

• 39:58Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 39:58Andy Frisella?

  My dad, my dad was like, well, uh, well, why the did you do that?

• 40:03Ed Mylett?

  Hmm.

• 40:03Andy Frisella?

  Don't do that. You know what I'm saying? Like, yeah. So, you know, I want to say this, though, on public record, like my childhood was, there was a lot, like if I were to go through it, there was a lot of really good. And there was a lot of really fucked up. And this is why I don't have sympathy for victims. You know what I'm saying? Like, bro, I've told you some of this and I don't talk about some of the publicly. And we had some really bad in reality that we had to deal with growing up. But the truth of the matter is I wouldn't change it for anything and I'm very grateful for the experience. And I'm grateful for how hard my parents tried, how, how much they, they did what they knew best to do for us. And we, we were taught the reality of existence through that childhood.

• 40:48Andy Frisella?

  And I think what to your point, a lot of parents protect their kids from learning reality and that handicaps them for life.

• 40:55Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 40:55Andy Frisella?

  And we see that every day and, you know, I don't see it really in my employees because I'm very blessed to have the people I have most. Because of, this is a great thing, because of how I am on the show, most of the people that come to work for us are also the same. They don't come here thinking I'm, it's going to be and sunshines and rainbows and flowers and. They understand it's, it's a hard team to play for. Like I always tell our team, I said, look, guys. We're the University of Alabama, bro. High standards are a fucking must. And we're not these other guys. We're not these other companies. We're not these other people. You're going to be demanded to perform at a high level. And if that's not for you, that's, that's okay.

• 41:31Ed Mylett?

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• 42:14Ed Mylett?

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• 42:58Ed Mylett?

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• 43:35Ed Mylett?

  Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Today's an honor for me. Today's all gonna be about really wisdom. And my guest today has 102 years worth of that wisdom. And she has a book out that is just extraordinary called The Well-Lived Life. 102 Year Old Doctors, Six Secrets to Health and Happiness at Every Age. So Dr. Gladys McGary, welcome finally to my show.

• 44:12Speaker 04

  I'm so happy to be here.

• 44:13Ed Mylett?

  You said, "If I could distill my life's work," and you nailed it down here. You said, "To be truly alive, we must find the life force within ourselves and direct our energy towards it." That sounds like an awful new age thing to say. And I'm wondering what you meant by that when you said it.

• 44:29Speaker 04

  I mean that we all have it. So it's something that we just have not introduced ourselves to because we've been so busy looking outside for our fixits and the things that make us happy or whatever we think has to be outside of ourselves. And don't realize that inside the very core of our being is what keeps us happy. As a matter of fact, I just learned a while back that the Welsh, when they get up in the morning and meet somebody, they don't say, "Good morning." They say, "How's your weird?"

• 45:10Ed Mylett?

  Really?

• 45:10Speaker 04

  Because the weird that they're talking about is this inner core of our being that is the thing that really keeps us going, our life force. I call it the physician within. But it's that life force that really is the engine that keeps the thing going.

• 45:31Ed Mylett?

  Is that what you mean about the juice of life? Because you also, by the way, it's amazing. I've not really heard anybody else use that term. I've been using the term about getting the juice out of something or the juice of life now for probably thirty years. Is that what you mean by that? I have, as I was fascinating when I was reading your work, I'm like, oh, my gosh, the juice of life. So is that connected to the life force?

• 45:50Speaker 04

  Absolutely.

• 45:52Ed Mylett?

  Okay.

• 45:52Speaker 04

  No, it's it's it's definitely connected to the life force because it's but juices are a lot, you know? If we don't have any juice, we're just kind of, uh, oh, you know, it's very sad.

• 46:08Ed Mylett?

  Well, I think most people, maybe you would agree. I shouldn't say most because that's a judgment. But you you say that the juice has two main parts, our individual essence, and then how we fit into the whole. And if I think about our culture today, I wonder how many people listening to this right now go, you know, I haven't tapped into my life force. And I I don't get a lot of the juice out of life. So could you elaborate on that, our individual essence, what a beautiful way to say it, and how we fit into the whole?

• 46:36Speaker 04

  If we start paying attention to some of the things that make us happy, that make us want to dance and sing, that want make sometimes just make you want to yell. Something has happened and you really don't like it very well. It's okay to go about yourselves and just holler sometime, you know? Sometimes we need to express ourselves in a way that we can understand it. Where we can understand what it is that that I'm trying to say to myself, you know, this this either is really, it's so good, I like it so well, or it really makes me sad, or it's however it's acting us.

• 47:21Speaker 04

  However, we're reacting, whatever it is, is our way of responding to life.

• 47:31Ed Mylett?

  Does that mean that you think that, you know, the full expression of your emotions matters? Meaning, like, I, I've had this theory for a while that I don't even know that there are positive or negative emotions. There just are emotions and that some-

• 47:43Speaker 04

  There are emotions. Yeah, it's energy. Energy is energy. And sometimes it's, sometimes it just doesn't feel very good and sometimes it feels great. But whatever it is, if we can begin to say, oh, yes, or no, no, no, I, I, and we back away from it, it's something that guides us from within ourselves that allows us to know what is, what we're responding to and how we're responding to it.

• 48:15Ed Mylett?

  How do you figure that out, Gladys?

• 48:17Speaker 04

  How do I?

• 48:18Ed Mylett?

  How do you figure that out? How do you know why you're, you know, I'm a big believer in self-awareness.

• 48:23Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 48:24Ed Mylett?

  Some of that just comes, I think, maybe with age because you've been around yourself a little bit longer. You know, I know more about myself at 52 right now than I certainly did at 22.

• 48:32Speaker 04

  Yeah, but you pay, you've been paying attention to it and a lot of times at 100, haven't been paying attention to it and still don't feel it. You know-

• 48:43Ed Mylett?

  How do you do that? How do you pay more attention? Is it, is it a little bit, is it a little quiet time? Is it, is it, is it starting to take note of how you behave and what your patterns are? How does one begin to do that?

• 48:54Speaker 04

  It, it, I, I think it's an individual thing, so it's hard to say blanket how. But when you begin to pay attention to what makes you respond to something-

• 49:10Ed Mylett?

  Yes.

• 49:10Speaker 04

  Even a person or, or a poem, or a song, or, or a flower, you know? Sometimes a rose will just say, oh, you know, ooh, that's great. You know, it's, it's the awareness of how we respond to the inside and outside of ourselves.

• 49:33Ed Mylett?

  I'm deeply moved by you and your work and I'm speaking for millions of people. I just want to say thank you. Thank you for finding your voice at 93.

• 49:41Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 49:42Ed Mylett?

  Thank you for having that dream. Thank you for listening to that dream and thank you for what you do.

• 49:47Speaker 04

  And thank you for allowing me to, to say it, to talk about it.

• 49:52Ed Mylett?

  I'm quite grateful. This is one of those experiences I will never forget. Today in particular is really an honor for me because I'm going to introduce somebody to you that some of you will know, but many of you will not know. And I wanted him on the show today solely because of how good his work is, how solid his content is. And helping people change their lives and perform at a higher level. I'd call him like a peak performance expert. There's all kinds of different terms I could come up to. Describe this man, but he's got a book called The Breakthrough Code that is outstanding and I like the way it's written. And he's just great at changing people's lives. And so Tom McCarthy, welcome to the show today.

• 50:28Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah, it's an honor to be with you, Ed, and I'm just amazed at what you've done in such a short period of time, man. It's incredible.

• 50:33Ed Mylett?

  Well, thank you. Driving here to do the interview today. I've had a little bit of rest lately. And I knew today was going to be awesome because I was coming in, I'm like, I I'm vibrating at a high frequency today. I know what it feels like to be vibrating at a high enough frequency where I'm going to produce a great result. And I know what it feels like oftentimes where I am not. And the last few weeks, frankly, just between my new TV show on Nozzy, everybody goes to get on Nozzy, starts August 22nd. The different things I've had in my life, my new book, all this other stuff, I've just not been vibrating at quite the energy level that I know is the success level that I need to be at. So talk a little bit about this. You said something in this. I've never heard someone say about. Cells and volts of energy and like you can actually prove almost.

• 51:15Ed Mylett?

  With with neuroscience or chemistry or math, why this is actually true. So let's go to the energy thing for a second and how one might direct it.

• 51:23Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah. So everything is energy and not just us, right? You know, the the cells and atoms and in our body. But everything like this, this table that we're, it's just condensed energy, this table right in front of us here. Everything's energy. And everything's created twice, first inside, then outside, right? This table was an idea in somebody's head at one point in time. And and then they, you know, through work, they formed energy and now we've got a table that we can. Put our hands on and and microphones and everything. So. Everything's energy and Einstein also, he was a big believer in the imagination and that energy follows thought. And so when we think of thought.

• 52:03Tom McCarthy?

  Energy follows that. When the president of the Ukraine was thinking, hey, we need help here, like energy was. Was was behind that thought and that thought came to you, you heard it and I heard it and. And all of a sudden, like we're rooting for him, right? We're rallying for them. So. When you understand, the challenge I think most people have, Ed, is they live so firmly planted in this physical world of the only thing that exists is what I can touch, what I can see, what I can feel, but everything's created twice. So there's things you can't touch, see, and feel that are being created now. They're not in physical reality yet. They're in the non-physical, but that's where all the greatness starts. And when someone's struggling, all

• 52:48Tom McCarthy?

  they can see is what is already there for them, and they get stuck, and then they conform. What I think we as human beings ideally should do, and this is hard, because it's fun to live in the physical world. And you've got all these great houses, you know, I have different toys and fun things, and it's fun, and that's why we're here. So I like doing that. But we also have to have ideally a foot in the non-physical, where there are no boundaries, where energy is waiting. It's just literally saying, what do you want, Ed? And what do you want? Like, everything you have, you're telling me about your, you know, beautiful homes, those all came from first you directing energy inside you to go out and make those opportunities real.

• 53:29Ed Mylett?

  Okay, brother. No one's ever said that on the show before, and it's so true. One, I talk a lot about, I think 99% of people operate out of a pattern of thinking that is history and memory. 1% of humans have worked to the extent that they operate of imagination and vision. They actually have that as their operating platform. The people that I naturally enjoy their energy, to quote you, are people who operate out of imagination. And by the way, you can just take an inventory of yourself and the people around you. How many of your conversations, your thoughts are about imagining and visioning, and how many of them are about history and memory? And in my life, I've just sort of, as I've gotten older, gravitated. But I'm telling you, almost everything I accomplish or that I do, I consciously begin to think about it. So out of the physical, I've never heard someone phrase it that way

• 54:12Ed Mylett?

  before. It's exactly what I do. I'm working on a few things right now. My process unconsciously, now that I'm 51 years old and has repeated it over 30 years, my process is to actually sit, get in a quiet, meditative state to some extent, and I'm talking about holding my hands and praying. I'm talking about just getting alone almost for me is that state. And it is to have a thought and then I am actually literally intentionally pouring energy into the thought.

• 54:37Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah.

• 54:37Ed Mylett?

  I'm trying to pour more and more and more energy into the thought and then I actually separate from it and I get away from it for a while.

• 54:42Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah.

• 54:42Ed Mylett?

  And I let it just sit with its energy. And then I pour more and more and more energy into that vision and that imagination and it amazes me how the world begins to conspire to help me make it true.

• 54:54Tom McCarthy?

  Yes.

• 54:54Ed Mylett?

  Whether it's that running on the street.

• 54:56Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah.

• 54:56Ed Mylett?

  Or a conversation today or something I then read and I'm like, what in the, why has this pop up?

• 55:02Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah.

• 55:02Ed Mylett?

  Right? So this is the process of creativity. It's thinking and then flooding it with energy. And the more successful you become, the more you have some wins, the more you begin to understand what that feels like when you're actually doing it.

• 55:16Tom McCarthy?

  And it's liberating because now you know there's nothing that can stop you.

• 55:19Ed Mylett?

  Right.

• 55:20Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah. And, and that's what most people don't have. They literally think there's lots of things out there that can stop them and they're not willing to take that leap of faith. And you've got to take the leap of faith in the beginning, like people that are listening to this that haven't, that, you know, that are not at Ed's level yet. Just know at one, at one point he was at your level, right? But he just outgrew that.

• 55:40Ed Mylett?

  Of course.

• 55:40Tom McCarthy?

  And it wasn't because, you know, he or me or anyone else is better than anybody else. It's just we're using the tools that everyone's using. As a matter of fact, people that are struggling, the reason they're struggling is because their subconscious is so powerful that it's taking all this information that they've put in that life's a struggle, life's hard, you can never get ahead and it's making it absolutely true for them.

• 56:02Ed Mylett?

  Yeah. So I, I so know that it's not that I'm different, which is why I'm in this space. I know humans can change. I know the reality can change because I'm so aware of my own limitations. I'm so aware of how many things I am either average at or sub average at, that if I can produce certain things in my life, because I, this is not even humility. I just realize my own limitations in terms of my intellect or my strength or my upbringing or my experiences, that if I can produce these things in my life, I absolutely one million percent sure know you listening to this or watching this can as well. And there is a process. It is both art and science. The art part, you're going to figure out as you go.

• 56:45Ed Mylett?

  The science part, which is what we're talking about today, is absolutely a replicatable process that you can start with. So let's start with a few of what those things are. I want to go back one thing because you just used a term I've not heard before, which is use your own electricity. And so just, I want to just, like, what does that mean to you? Because people say energy. I think a lot of people have heard the term energy before and like, look, I just don't get it. You know, but electricity.

• 57:09Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah.

• 57:10Ed Mylett?

  I don't think most people look at themselves as electric.

• 57:12Tom McCarthy?

  Hmm.

• 57:13Ed Mylett?

  And they are. And it's almost like, use the example of a light, everyone, God bless you. But if you really are an electrical being.

• 57:20Tom McCarthy?

  Mm hmm.

• 57:21Ed Mylett?

  It's so sad to dim your light over time.

• 57:24Tom McCarthy?

  Great, great analogy. I like that.

• 57:26Ed Mylett?

  Me too, and just reading your work and you've reduced your electrical charge. And the external evidence of that is the lights dimming in your life. The cool part is that at any given time, you can start to take control and charge of your electricity. I just like that term better than energy.

• 57:44Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah.

• 57:44Ed Mylett?

  So are we electric actually as human beings? And maybe like one thought or concept about how one begins to up their amp level, so to speak.

• 57:53Tom McCarthy?

  So Bruce Lipton, who you're probably familiar with, Biology of Belief, he's the one that, that I got the data from on. Each cell has a certain charge and we've got, I can't even remember since I wrote it, but we have, you know, like billions or trillions of cells in our bodies. So, yeah, we got a lot of electricity, like we could light up a city if we used it effectively. I really love what you just said, though, like, because I've never thought of it like someone dimming their light. Because I think that really is what's happening or what's happened to a lot of people. It's not like they don't have the, the charge available, but they've got it on the dimmer, right? And they're, and they're just so used to having it dimmed out that they think that's all there is.

• 58:35Tom McCarthy?

  You and I, the reason we do this, and I've been doing this a long time and, and, you know, don't necessarily have to do it anymore. But I really feel like my purpose, and I know your purpose is to help people understand they can do so much more. And it's not about doing more, it's about really expressing themselves and living their purpose and do the work that they came here to do. And I think a lot of people have lost sight of that, or they're not even clear what that is.

• 59:02Ed Mylett?

  Man, I've enjoyed today so much. It bums me out that we have to finish, like I, I, I could go two more hours with you. I can feel this, like just our, frankly, our energy.

• 59:11Tom McCarthy?

  Yeah.

• 59:12Ed Mylett?

  Our, our frequency is, is so similar. I have a really good friend here today. One of the most downloaded shows we've ever done before because he'll surprise you. You know him from television. He's an incredible television personality with ridiculousness and a million other projects that he's done. He's one of my favorite people I've ever met in my life to talk with, if not my favorite. And I thought today I'd just let you sit in on one with us. We're gonna talk today with the great Rob Dierdick. Welcome to the show, brother.

• 59:40Rob Dyrdek?

  Hey, thank you for having me.

• 59:41Ed Mylett?

  Energy depletion, one other place, because you mentioned Brianna, and that is, what about humans who drain your energy? Have you had to sort of, I don't, cut people out? Or like, are you cognizant of the humans you associate with from an energy depletion or giving you energy standpoint? Is that something that's also part of this formula for you?

• 1:00:02Rob Dyrdek?

  Yeah, I want to give you two versions of it, right? Because I think the getting rid of the bad energy is an easy one to talk through, but it's, it's how do you optimize with those that you love? That's what I think is, is, is a lot more evolved and, and sort of what I've grown into. But I first started, you know, by just asking myself every single day and rating qualitatively, how do I feel about my life, my work, and my health, zero to 10? And if it's low, you think about why it's low, and you make a note of it. And you'll find that the people that bring you down start popping up. And then, then it becomes

• 1:00:43Rob Dyrdek?

  so obvious, right? Like, I had people that worked for me that were, were really, truly disrupting the quality of my life on a consistent basis that I didn't, I didn't have clarity on, until I was asking myself, how did you feel about work yesterday, zero to 10? And then it was like a four, because I was fighting with, with one of my executives for like, three hours, and had to change my entire vision for it, because it's not what they wanted to do. Like, like, I began to see that, and then eventually cleared every single person that brought me down out. All of them. Every single one of them, right? And including

• 1:01:24Rob Dyrdek?

  in that same process, then there's certain parts of the business that, that drained me, that I had to either learn, or stop being involved in, right? Like, it was very informative from a qualitative standpoint. Now, I go to the most important relationship, that is my wife. And it is, I am just, it is system after system after system on system on system on system on system, strictly.

• 1:01:52Rob Dyrdek?

  Releasing and relieving any friction in our relationship. And, and it sounds like, oh, well, like, what could that possibly be? Well, you know, first it starts with the age old date night. Right? And so, oh, like, schedule the date night. You know what I'm saying? It wasn't enough to keep us balanced and happy. So the schedule is, you know, a Monday night talk night, a Thursday night movie night, a Wednesday morning breakfast, a Friday night sushi. Like, it's, it's having a rhythm of, of dates and times that we spend in the week. Now, it's, it's not a matter of like, oh, you made one hour available. You, you've integrated your wife into your life. Now that was essential to begin to stop that friction.

• 1:02:38Rob Dyrdek?

  Then she started hearing me telling stories of stuff that I was working on and be like, I didn't even hear that. So, okay, how do I solve that? Then I started sending her an email every single morning of everything that I was doing in the day and what it meant to me with a love quote. So that she got that every single day and was completely informed at, at what I was doing. So now, how do I automate that? I have my assistant scrape my, um, my calendar and put it into an email and put it in my email that I can look in the morning. I go and find the love quote, depending on the energy of the, the, the season. And then I send it to her every single day. Right? And so, okay, that seems like, you look at that alone. Like, look at you guys, like, in your rhythm.

• 1:03:21Rob Dyrdek?

  Like, you, you go with her every day to drop the kids off and pick them up. For most days, like, you have this, uh, balanced rhythm with everything. And now she's completely informed, but getting friction on how complex our life was and all these big projects moving on. Then we move to a Thursday family sync, where we get all the executive, uh, uh, uh, existence and executive assistance together. And then we go through everything going on with the family and get organized and everything that needs to get done. Now we have the Thursday family sync to eliminate that. In the middle of that, like, stuff's popping up in the schedule. She's seeing it in that email in the morning and be like, What is this? You're going to do Ed's podcast today?

• 1:04:05Rob Dyrdek?

  So what did we do? We added a new system to the family sync where I go through the calendar and then like say everything that I'm doing. Hey, the UFC fight in two weeks on Saturday night. I'm gonna wanna watch that. Anything that might be disruptive. And again, keeping our energy, our communication and our flow. Then like, okay, there's certain things where you know, we'll get stuck on and not want to talk about. We started bringing a therapist to the house every other Tuesday at four o'clock. So now, now we have this neutral ground that's basically, you know, I akin it to tuning a Ferrari. Where you already have this, this highly, but another friction is like these

• 1:04:47Rob Dyrdek?

  issues that you may not want to discuss even in these, this sort of flow that you're in. Here's this sort of neutral ground that you really don't have unless you bring somebody in. And you just begin to see all of these things layering on top of, of, of, of the goal of having the, the happiest, amazing relationship that you could possibly have.

• 1:05:10Ed Mylett?

  So good. I, I, I knew about the email and which by the way, I started to do myself because you told me about that. By the way, everybody, you listen to my show so that somehow every week you become inspired or learn how to improve your life. If that is not happening for you right now, if there's not been something said here today by this man that is causing you to go, whoa. By the way, you're on the inside of what people that have blissful and happy and successful lives talk about and think about. These are the conversations that they have. I'm so excited to have this man here today. He's incredible. He's constantly ranked as one of the top three, four, five leadership experts in the world. He's an author of a whole bunch of different books. We're talking 20 million plus copies sold of his books.

• 1:05:51Ed Mylett?

  And you know what? There's a bunch of people that endorse his work. I mean, people like Nobel Prize winners, Desmond Tutu, Jon Bon Jovi and me. I endorse his work. And so he's got a new book out called The Everyday Hero Manifesto, which is incredible. It's about 10 books in one book. So Robin Sharma, welcome to the show.

• 1:06:08Rob Dyrdek?

  Real blessing, Ed. Nice, nice to finally meet you.

• 1:06:10Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, pleasure. This book. I said in the intro, it's 101 chapters, but they're easy to read chapters. And it's, it's a lot of different stuff in one book. It almost looked to me like you said, you know what, I'm going to give you everything I've got in one book. And the premise of it, kind of was interesting to me. You said, why do you think the world needs more everyday heroes? Cause I think in the world today, most people don't look at themselves as heroic.

• 1:06:34Robin Sharma?

  That's exactly why I wrote the book. That's exactly what it is. It's when we, society has seduced us into thinking that the heroes are on the mountaintops. Martin Luther King Jr.'s, the Mother Teresa's, the Hedy Lamarr's, the Desmond Tutus, the JFK's, the MLK's.

• 1:06:53Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:53Robin Sharma?

  And that's true. These people have overcome suffering and transcended tragedy to do amazing things with their lives. And they've served the world and they freed nations and they've showed us what possibility looks like.

• 1:07:06Robin Sharma?

  But what about the ditch digger? Who does his work like Beethoven composed music? What about the single father or mother, working hard and seeing the dignity of their labor, putting food on the table and being a good community servant? What about the pizza maker? What about the gardener? What about the firefighter? What about the startup entrepreneur toiling quietly for 20 years of anonymity? Until they are unicorn takes off. Like, I, I think we've just been seduced and hypnotized and brainwashed and heartwashed into believing that heroes are cut from a different cloth. And so I wrote the Everyday Hero Manifesto, not only to give tools, but to give philosophy,

• 1:07:51Robin Sharma?

  because methodology without philosophy is an empty sport.

• 1:07:56Ed Mylett?

  Wow.

• 1:07:56Robin Sharma?

  And I'd love to dial into that point, but that's why I wrote the book. There are no extra people on the planet today. A lot of people are suffering. A lot of people have resigned themselves to average and given up on their genius, which they were born into. And I want to help them to remember that.

• 1:08:10Ed Mylett?

  And so let's talk about that philosophy part a little bit too. What did you mean when you said that?

• 1:08:13Robin Sharma?

  It's a great question because I've done a lot of these interviews and everyone's so many times, it's like, what are the tactics?

• 1:08:19Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:20Robin Sharma?

  What are the habits?

• 1:08:21Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:21Robin Sharma?

  So what do I need to do?

• 1:08:23Ed Mylett?

  Right.

• 1:08:25Robin Sharma?

  I think we live in a mathematical world, so it's all about doing, it's all about what do we need to do, give me the five steps, and the book is full of, as you've seen, hundreds and hundreds of tools that I've shared with many of the most successful people in the world as their mentor. But philosophy is your mountaintop. If you don't know your Mount Everest, then what's the point of having great methodology to scale the wrong mountain? That's a recipe for heartbreak.

• 1:08:50Ed Mylett?

  Well, by the way, I completely agree with you. It's interesting, I'm constantly asked for tactics and strategies, because that's the thing right now.

• 1:08:55Robin Sharma?

  Sure.

• 1:08:56Ed Mylett?

  It's really interesting, but if you have an understanding of why you're doing something, and the belief systems behind it, usually those works are empty. And I think a lot of times, it's a very vogue, you know, very in vogue thing right now to be teaching, okay, this is my routine, this is the thing I do, and you and I both do a lot of that. But I think without an understanding of why or how philosophically, it's something that doesn't work for most people. But it's interesting to use the word hero, because, and genius, because I don't think most people view themselves, the ditch digger, for example, the mother who's right now raising three kids that are running around the house, plus trying to write her, you know, her blog that she's doing right now, and just, she doesn't look at herself as heroic. In fact, I think in the book, there's a chapter that you have, I think it's called "From Victim to Hero: The Leaps That One Must Make."

• 1:09:41Ed Mylett?

  And I think the other thing in our culture right now, more than ever, is there is a little bit of a victim mentality, in that, you know, that maybe the world's conspiring against me, or my conditions, my background, my story, my shame, my mistakes that I've made in my life, disqualify me from doing anything heroic in the future, right? And so, let's talk a little bit about those leaps in that process.

• 1:10:01Robin Sharma?

  Well, one of the chapters in the book is called "The Chestnut Sellers Doctrine." And I spent a lot of time in Europe, and one night, I love doing these wisdom walks late at night, sometimes two in the morning, or five in the morning, I walk the streets, and I just think, and I look at the stars. And so, it was about midnight, Ed, and the luxury stores were empty, tourists streamed out of these beautiful restaurants.

• 1:10:30Robin Sharma?

  Not a lot of people were really on the street and there was one square in particular and there was a man hunched over, I still remember it, with a blue woolen cap with moonbeam sort of over him. And as I grew nearer, I noticed he was, he was heating chestnuts. And he had this little rickety stove and these chestnuts on it, he was just moving it and there was a gentle smile on his face and I walked over because I think everyone we meet has a story to tell and a lesson to teach if we have the openness to hear it. Agreed. So I walked over and I bought some of his chestnuts and I said, you know, what's your story? And he said, well, I'm an immigrant to this country. I was a very successful business person.

• 1:11:14Robin Sharma?

  I got ill, I lost my home, I lost my fortune, I lost my business. He said, I moved here and now I buy these chestnuts and I warm them and I sell them to tourists and people who are walking by on the street and I work many, many hours a day. But he says, you know, I can still work and so I can still make people happy. Wow. And to me, that's, you know, in a world where you're right, there is a lot of entitlement in this world, but, you know, I've mentored so many billionaires, for example, and one thing about the billionaires, they all are intimate with their access of power. What does that mean? Well, it means that, that you can tell a victim, and I'm not judging just reporting, but victims give away their power to external circumstances. They say it's because of the economy, it's because of the pandemic, it's because of

• 1:11:59Robin Sharma?

  my husband, because of my wife, because of my children, because of my past, that I can't live my genius and change the world. But people, as you know so well, you're one of them, people who do amazing things in the world are very intimate with their inner heroism. Yeah. And they don't depend on the world to give them a living. They're willing to exercise their own discipline to materialize their own gifts and their talents. How does that happen? It comes with practice. Do we all have this potential? Absolutely. Martin Luther King Jr. said, unless you've found something willing, you're willing to die for, you're not fit to live. Yes. I would take a bullet for the idea that any person on the planet today, with the right philosophy, with the right methodology, with enough time.

• 1:12:48Robin Sharma?

  can do incredible things with their lives. Again, that doesn't mean they need to be a billionaire.

• 1:12:52Ed Mylett?

  Correct.

• 1:12:53Robin Sharma?

  You know, that's, that's where I think that the world has fallen apart. It's like,

• 1:12:56Ed Mylett?

  So do I.

• 1:12:57Robin Sharma?

  you hear people introducing people, he's really important because he's a billionaire. Yeah, but what about, what about the person who helps kids walk across? It's like, we're all important.

• 1:13:06Ed Mylett?

  Yep. I think we have this addiction now to the big.

• 1:13:10Robin Sharma?

  Yes, exactly.

• 1:13:11Ed Mylett?

  It's gotta be big.

• 1:13:12Robin Sharma?

  That's it.

• 1:13:12Ed Mylett?

  Or it's not important. And if you actually reflect on your own lives, it's actually typically things in quiet moments and small things that have been gifts given to you by people that aren't well-known or aren't wealthy that have made the biggest difference in your own lives. I think I have a sister, because I think sometimes people think, well, hey, you're, you're pretty well-known now. You're moving and shaking and doing all these things. I've made a couple bucks and influenced people. And my sister is a, uh, she's my middle sister, Andrea. I don't, I don't know why all of a sudden it's getting me because she's been my middle sister for a long time. It makes me emotional. But my sister was basically born with diabetes. And over time, she lost her vision. And I think she's legally blind. She can't drive anymore. I've helped connect her with some doctors. She can see a little

• 1:13:56Ed Mylett?

  bit now. But she's a school teacher. And in a quiet little Christian school, doesn't make any money. But for the last 20 years of her life, she's been making a difference in these young, beautiful souls' lives over and over, every day. No camera on her, no Instagram, no big money, no big impact. Yet she is an everyday hero. She's the type of person that you write about in her book. I hope she's listening to this so she knows how heroic she is. But you use the word, I want to understand this a little deeper. So I think you can articulate it. You said, become more intimate with it. Intimate with their own understanding of their heroism. How does one begin to do that?

• 1:14:36Robin Sharma?

  I think the fourth chapter of the Everyday Hero Manifesto was the gold miners paradox.

• 1:14:42Robin Sharma?

  In ancient Thailand, there was a golden Buddha. It was a towering figure made of pure gold. The people around the country worshipped it. It was this incredibly value, incredible value of this treasure. And then it became clear that invaders were going to come into the country. And the warriors were going to take it. So the inhabitants hatched a plan and they decided to hide the golden Buddha. And so what they decided to do was put layer upon layer upon layer of mud and soil and clay and rocks to hide this magnificent treasure. And sure enough, when the warriors came in, they walked right by it and they missed the golden Buddha.

• 1:15:25Robin Sharma?

  Well, a few hundred years later, Ed, you know, there was this young boy walking by and he sees this gold peeking out from all this mountain of mud. He and other people, his neighbors, started chipping away at the layers of mud. And every time they chipped away at a bit more mud, more of the gold shined. There was an immediate payoff and they chipped away more of the layers of the mud and more of the golden Buddha started to shine. And as they did it, day after day after day, and after a few weeks, there was this incredible treasure known as the golden Buddha. And you've seen, I actually went and visited it. There's the picture of me standing in front of it. It's amazing. And I could not think of a better metaphor So good. to describe So good. how we've forgotten who we truly are.

• 1:16:06Robin Sharma?

  We are born into perfection and then we are seduced into average. So right. And what does that look like? It looks like the programming of our mothers, fathers, teachers, preachers, peers, et cetera. It's the programming of the media, it's the programming of the world around us. We pick up doubt, fear, disbelief, and it's not only mindset, a key part of my work, I talk about it a lot in the Everyday Hero Manifesto, but even in my other work, it's not only the mental programming that we pick up that separates us from who we truly are. It's also what I call, not only mindset, but heart set. We get wounded through macro and micro trauma and we disassociate with our brave and wise

• 1:16:51Robin Sharma?

  and creative and productive hearts. And so what happens if, as this process continues, the layers get formed over the gold and we forget who we truly are. And then we have a story about our potential, we have a story about our prosperity, we have a story about our health, we have a story about what we can do and be in the world. And if you repeat, and our behaviors are always aligned with our self-identity and the story.

• 1:17:15Ed Mylett?

  That's right.

• 1:17:16Robin Sharma?

  And then we fight for that story, even though it's a lie that we've sold ourselves.

• 1:17:19Ed Mylett?

  Everybody should go back and listen to that last minute. I want you to hear the whole interview, but that last minute is the holy grail of what happens in our lives. It becomes this conditioned pattern that we begin to reinforce our own story over and over and over again. And then unless you, and then one of the most powerful things you could do, and by the way, it's the reason I want money of you to get this book, all of you to get the book, is that just in awareness that you're in this conditioning and this pattern, has it lose a little bit of its power over you? And then once you're aware you're doing it or you have it, now you're open to the philosophies and strategies of change. But until you have an awareness that, oh, my gosh, I am doing this, I'm living this conditioning and pattern that might, because you were born to do something great. You weren't, you were born special. You were born heroic. You were born wired with your own

• 1:18:02Ed Mylett?

  special form of your genius, your vision, your humor, your beauty, your nurturing skills, your listening ability. It could be any number of different geniuses that you have. And then you were conditioned to believe over time that those things didn't matter and that they don't make an impact. And so, super powerful. So you know those pieces in your closet that you find yourself wearing like on repeat all the time? That sweater that kind of just goes with everything, or these perfect pair of pants? Those are the pieces that make getting dressed easy, and that's what Quince does best. Quince focuses on high-quality wardrobe staples with premium materials like 100% Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton. The styles are timeless, versatile, and designed to become the dependable pieces you reach for every day. It's what I'm wearing right now. They give you the softness and quality you'd expect from a luxury brand without the price tag. Quince also makes premium

• 1:18:47Ed Mylett?

  pants, fitted tees and polos, and breathable activewear. Quality basics designed to work with your wardrobe and hold up to everyday wear. I love their cotton tees. I'm wearing one now, and I get a ton of compliments when I wear them on the podcast and when I speak. So, find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to quince.com/ed for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. That's Q U I N C E dot com slash ed. So you know, I've been trying to take my health and my morning routine to the next level. And I used to do a whole bunch of different stuff, tons of different supplements. And then I found all in one in a drink with IM8. IM8 is the way to simplify your supplement routine, finally, once and for all.

• 1:19:32Ed Mylett?

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• 1:20:14Ed Mylett?

  This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow The Ed Mylett Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. I gotta tell you something. Today's gonna be one of those, you're gonna share it with people and there'll be definitely conversations about it because of who my guest is. He's a psychic medium, but he's been a guy that I've followed for about two decades. And I've been fascinated by and interested in. And now that we've connected in person, I consider him a friend. So I'm excited. John Edwards, thank you for being here, brother. Thank you for having me. I'm a huge believer that the people that I know that are very successful in business and even personal relationships, they rely on intuition far more than they do just techniques

• 1:20:58Ed Mylett?

  and tactics out of Business 101 or social media school. Intuition is a huge part of life. Energy's a huge part of life. But I'm wondering, a lot of people, when they find out they're good at something, I used the word gift earlier, I think we both defined what it means. No matter what yours is, you found out you've got this gift for teaching, this gift for touch, this gift for humor, this gift for discernment, this gift for caring, nurturing, intellect. Sometimes people, when they figure out they've got this thing, it almost scares them and they retreat from it to some extent. And that's what holds them back all their life. I think unhappy people, to some extent, know there's something they could or should be doing for the greater good of other people and are rejecting their calling. And that's a formula to live in misery.

• 1:21:43Ed Mylett?

  Anybody listening to this, regardless of what it is, for you, you're this young man, now you're becoming more aware, this is a little bit different than everybody else, or I have more of it to some extent. I can, I have an ability to tap into it, maybe to an extent others don't. Did it scare you? Did you realize you were different? Was it exciting?

• 1:22:00John Edward?

  It was more like, how does this work?

• 1:22:03Ed Mylett?

  How do I get better, like build the muscle level?

• 1:22:06John Edward?

  Exactly. How do I, how do I, how do I learn about this? And my mom's younger brother was married at the time to a woman who actually did like card readings. And she wouldn't call herself a psychic. She just read, she read cards. And I remember sitting next to them. She was reading for my mom. And I, I heard, you can do this. And it was to the point that I wanted to be like, who said that? Like, who said that? And it was, it was like a, I want to say it was more of a knowing. So for anybody that's like listening to this, there's a moment where you'll have this. It's not a, I want this. And it's not, I need this. It's, I know this.

• 1:22:49John Edward?

  And when you know something, it's better than believing in something. So for me, the like, I knew it in that moment. And that was, that was a very defining moment for me, where I like got up from the, the place where they were doing the reading and I walked away and my mom said, did you hear something that you didn't like? And I went, nope. And I, I kind of kept it quiet for a while. And I was like, I believe I can do this. And I went to the, I went to bookstore, excuse me. It was a Walden bookstore on Glen Cove Road. And there was nobody in it. And I went to the, of course, in the back section again, because that's where all the books were, in the back section. And what I found really interesting is the shelves had this kind of like curvature to it. And I was about two or three feet away from the, the bookshelves and I was kind of just like looking at what was there and...

• 1:23:35John Edward?

  And I would equate this for any guy who's going to buy condoms in a pharmacy, where you don't want anybody watching you, like picking them up, right? And that's how I felt, the exact same analogy. It's like, like I'm looking at these books, but like, I'm close enough to the other books that I can like reach over from one of those instead. So I'm standing there and I'm like, not near the shelves. The woman who's managing the store is in the middle of the shelf, the middle of the bookstore. She's restacking stuff and she's about maybe 12 feet away from me. And a deck of tarot cards fell off, like somebody went, and I'm just like, I watched it happen and I'm like, shut up, right? And the lady goes, well, clearly you're supposed to buy those. So I did, I bought my first deck of cards. So, you know, I go home, don't tell anybody.

• 1:24:17John Edward?

  And I'm like looking through the little book of cards, you know, the meanings of it. And my grandma's house was always hopping on a Sunday, right? She had 11 kids, who had kids, who had kids, so, you know.

• 1:24:26Ed Mylett?

  Packed.

• 1:24:27John Edward?

  Packed, packed. So I said to my cousin Florence that I was doing readings and she's like, oh my God, totally agree with me. So I did. So there I am, you know, with the book. I'm like, well, this means this and, you know. And about two weeks later, she called me and said, you're gonna be at grandma's house on Sunday? And I go, I live here. Of course I'm gonna be at grandma's house. Why? She's like, would you, would you do my cards again and can I bring five friends? And I was like, wait a second. I'm like, no. And I'm like, I have no idea what I'm doing. She's like, well, everything you said happened in the last two weeks.

• 1:24:57Ed Mylett?

  Crazy.

• 1:24:58John Edward?

  She's like, and I told my friends and they were like, well, can you get it to do for me? And that's legitimately how I started. Like I started reading for like cousins and then the friends of my cousins and then their friends. And then it became that type of thing. And I started working at Psychic Affairs and that was the journey.

• 1:25:11Ed Mylett?

  It's interesting when you tell stories, I told you this off camera too. By the way, everyone listening to this, you get to make up your own mind, right? About this, these, the different aspects of what John's talking about. How it works for you in your life or doesn't work. But, you know, and I want to make clear that for everybody as well. But one of the things that you do very interestingly is we're both huge energy people. You obviously feel it. I want to talk about that next. I want to talk about the application of some of these skills in every person's life listening or watching this. How can they apply some of these skills in their own life? But when you tell a story, first you're a great storyteller. But you're, but you're, it's true, but your energy changes. I see you. As a little boy, when you're telling these stories, we did a few off-camera too. Like, I actually see the little boy. That's not normal that when someone tells me a story,

• 1:25:56Ed Mylett?

  that I actually begin to picture the boy. I can see him and feel his energy when you're speaking. But it tells me at a minimum, your ability to transfer and feel energy is at an extraordinarily high level. I just want to acknowledge that in you. It's not normal. In fact, I don't think anybody else I've ever talked to has that ability. Everyone's laughing off-camera here, you guys, because it's actually true. Everyone feels it here. But let's talk about energy in general. I'm a big believer that you need to protect your energy in life, right?

• 1:26:26John Edward?

  That's why we're gonna be friends.

• 1:26:26Ed Mylett?

  That's right. I know. That's exactly why. And I also feel like you have this great analogy about the pool, too. So I wonder where does it get this lesson? More than ever in the world, are there competing energy forces that are coming at us and leaving us at any given time? What advice would you give to someone just trying to be happier, live more productively, regarding the people around them and the energy they bring?

• 1:26:48John Edward?

  First, we have to do inventory. We have to look and, let's make this about shopping. If we're gonna make a dinner for your family, and you decide that you're gonna make lasagna, you may or may not, without getting up and looking at your cupboards and looking at your fridge and freezer, you may or may not have what it is that you need. So we have to assess and take inventory before we know what we need and what we no longer need. So there are certain things that you're gonna go, "You know what? I have the cheese for lasagna, but it expired a year ago. So I need to get rid of that." So we need to assess and take inventory. What is going to be needed for the ingredients of what we're building or making?

• 1:27:28Ed Mylett?

  Now.

• 1:27:28John Edward?

  For the now. For this, you know, not the meal that we had last year, but the one that we're making now. So when we talk about what are the ingredients, I mean the people and the energies. And when you make that lasagna, it's layered. And there are certain things that are great by themselves, and there are certain things that are great when they come together. But then if you travel internationally, you know that there are certain things that they'll put in your lasagna where you will go... Ew, not in this one, not for me, right? So using the layers and the inventory, we assess what works for us and what doesn't. And then we have to be honest. We have to be honest that we might love this person. We might love this person more than anything. But if this person doesn't work in the lasagna of your life,

• 1:28:11John Edward?

  then we have to make a decision to not include it. And to recognize that this is toxic. So there were certain things that in part of working with energy that I've had to recognize that this is not a positive person. This is not a positive circumstance. This is not a positive situation. And I'm gonna move that. And I think one of the earliest things is, you know, growing up with an alcoholic father and losing my mom at a very young age. I, my mom on her deathbed literally begged me to have a relationship with my dad. And I said, no. And she was like, you're gonna deny me a dying woman, her last dying wish? And I said, yes, I am. And she said, why? I said, because it's a promise I don't know if I can keep.

• 1:28:55John Edward?

  And I said, more importantly, it's a promise you shouldn't ask me to make.

• 1:28:58Ed Mylett?

  Wow.

• 1:28:59John Edward?

  And she said...

• 1:29:00Ed Mylett?

  You said this as an 18, 19-year-old boy.

• 1:29:01John Edward?

  I did. And she said, why is that? I said, because I need to do what's best for me. And what if he's not what's best for me? And now, why can I say that at 18 or 19? Well, I can say that because I'd already been doing readings for four years. I had already been exposed to understanding the language of energy. The tools of the language of energy, you know, whether it be numerology, astrology, cards, psychometry, all these different, you know, things that were, let's call them symbolic languages to help us amplify the way the universal energy works. And so, yes, I was able to quite confidently say I wouldn't be able to do that. Now, that doesn't mean that after she passed, I didn't make my attempts, which I did. And I knew they weren't gonna be successful.

• 1:29:44John Edward?

  And they weren't self-inflicted prophecies, because I really did try. And I know that he did, in his own way. But they just weren't going to be in this lifetime.

• 1:29:54Ed Mylett?

  Well, I think it's a powerful thing, I wanna jump in and come back, because you're going in such an awesome direction. It's never been gone on the show before. And that is that just because somebody is your blood doesn't mean they're the right energy for you in your life. I think oftentimes, people kind of, they'll buy into this notion that... This friend of mine no longer serves me, right? Their energy no longer serves me, or maybe never did. And I finally got the confidence maybe to do some separation from that energy. But it's much different for people when it comes to family sometimes, don't you think?

• 1:30:22John Edward?

  Yep.

• 1:30:22Ed Mylett?

  And that, I think what you're saying is giving somebody permission that if that is your intuition, if that is your energy, just because you share a blood with somebody does not mean their energy necessarily should be required in your life.

• 1:30:36John Edward?

  Yep, and boundaries are important. I think it's very, very important. We create boundaries everywhere in our lives, right? You have boundaries while you're driving your car, those little lines on the highway. You have boundaries in your home, your property lines and survey. You can't buy a property or a house without getting a survey and knowing where the property lines are, right? And that's where you build your life, within the survey of those property lines. But we don't look at that energetically. So I want people to energetically look at where the property lines are for them and to know that it's not okay for your neighbor to encroach on your property and take the fruit of your trees without your permission, right? So it's not okay for, and you'll see this with siblings, you know, if you have two sisters and one's stealing the other one's clothes, going in their room, taking their stuff, that's a violation of someone's property. And sometimes parents don't say, "Hey, hey, hey, ask first," or "It's okay."

• 1:31:21John Edward?

  So I think it's important to establish healthy boundaries energetically from a young age. I did that. I did that learning about this work.

• 1:31:28Ed Mylett?

  Very good. Let's even go a little deeper. What is this energy thing? Like, the people who are listening to this are like, "Is this just how you make me feel?" In other words, if I'm evaluating someone's energy in my life, would that be the best way to describe it? This is how I feel from you? Am I energized, not energized? You take from me, you contribute to me?

• 1:31:47John Edward?

  So who are we as people, right? We look at each other and we assess us by what we look like in this world, right? And that's why racism is apparent, because people see differences and they assess those differences. They define who they are by status of those differences. But yet if you did not see people for who they were, but you only heard them and you only communicated with them on a level, whether it be corresponding with words, and you cannot see or hear them, then you're dealing with a communication of their consciousness or energy. So that consciousness or energy which resides in this Is kind of who we are and then inside this vehicle it gets amplified. So using vehicles as an analogy, if we were to drive down the highway of life, you'll see all different types of cars.

• 1:32:29John Edward?

  And you will, whether you want to admit it or not, see someone in a vehicle and assess them for why they're driving that vehicle. That's right. You will see the older guy in the hot red Ferrari, you know, with the convertible. And the young woman in the car next to him and immediately think. You, but you don't realize that that's actually somebody who's a really successful person who runs a car dealership. And that is his granddaughter in the car. Right? So that assessment is based upon a judgment or an energy or what people are projecting out. But then there is the exact opposite of that, where what you thought to be true is true. So you have to always like discern or read the energy of a circumstance without prejudging it. So I always go to this one example.

• 1:33:13John Edward?

  I never look at my clients and go, oh, well, they're probably here to hear from that person or they probably lost that person. I've always been wrong if I've ever done that. Really? Yeah. So I don't do that. I wait till like it comes out in a reading. And I remember having this couple who sat in front of me and if you would have said before the reading. How do you think they're connected logically and who do you think they're here to see? I would have been like husband and wife and one of the most apparent.

• 1:33:36John Edward?

  He was her nephew. She was younger than him. His mom was her sister who had passed. Whoa.

• 1:33:45John Edward?

  And I, I literally remember that moment and that reading has got to be from like nineteen ninety five. No way. Of all the readings too, right? I remember that clearly because it was just like, you know, if you were to assess, like assess the energy of who you thought somebody was. Yeah. I would a hundred percent would have been wrong. Yeah. So I waited until I got what came through and then kind of went there. But my point of looking at who are who we are, we are an energetic vibrational frequency, a consciousness, a soul, call it whatever you want. I like the word energy. Um, inside this physical manifestation where we have free will to make decisions in order to affect changes as those things ripple out. And I talk about a line of probability on our line of probability. The past happens, can't change it, but you can learn from it. The president is.

• 1:34:29John Edward?

  where we are right now, but from this moment on into the future, that's not written yet. And what you do with your energy and your thoughts and how you project that is how that actually will manifest.

• 1:34:38Ed Mylett?

  Bingo. 3 billion percent agree. This is the most important. I don't know that we can cover anything more important than this on the show like I. It's hard for me, you articulated better. It's hard for me to explain why I think. Some things in my life are, you know, better than average. Let's just say it that way. And I'm a freak about this topic. I'm a freak about transferring energy. If I'm trying to persuade, it's the transference of energy. If you're in my, if it's, if it's comforting energy, you know, intense energy. But I also am such a protector of my own and who I allow in my pool, which I want you to give that example in a minute. Because for me, it's been the number one shift in my life is this idea. And by the way, for everyone listening to this concept could be new to you, this idea.

• 1:35:23Ed Mylett?

  Just start to be conscious of energy, of transferring it, of your vibrational frequency. Those of you that are people of faith, if you're a Christian like myself. You can believe in all the things you believe in and still be aware that there's an energy field, that there's still. Transfer of energy, there's a vibrational frequency with human beings. This is, this is not a debatable fact.

• 1:35:42John Edward?

  No, it's energy. It's a science.

• 1:35:43Ed Mylett?

  It's a science. It's a real thing. And so I, I am a huge protector. Especially as I get older, my friends are very diverse. You could have a really well-known actor entertainer is a friend of mine and. My bestie runs a transmission shop, right? A buddy of mine's a flooring contractor and another guy's a professional football player.

• 1:36:01John Edward?

  Cause you're not what you do.

• 1:36:02Ed Mylett?

  Their, their, yeah, their careers are. It's for me, it's not what they do, it's who they are that matter in my life. It's the energy they bring me. I love, I love. Humorous energy. Most of the dudes around me or the ladies around me are funny people because I want to have that part of my heart expanded. But talk about the pool part of it, if you would, because this is the best of the best analogies.

• 1:36:22John Edward?

  So one of the things that I am kind of known for besides like, you know, doing what I do analogy wise is I want to inspire people. I want people to live a better life. I want them to evolve with where, where they're at. And some folks, when they come to see me, you know, they think they're coming just to talk to dad and then they get all this other stuff and they're like. But I'm not here for that. I'm like, no, you didn't come. I'm here for that. Right. That's not, that's not why you came. But it is why you're here, because otherwise you wouldn't be sitting in front of me. I go, so just put it in the back. Remember what I'm saying? And one of the things that I tell people is that we are an energetic pool. And I like everybody to think about themselves. So if you can imagine yourself sitting in a jacuzzi. Right? Because it's a, not a pool pool, but it's a pool, right? So you're in, you're in your pool. And imagine that you're in your space, your energy. And who do you want swimming in your pool?

• 1:37:07John Edward?

  And they like, look at me like, what do you mean? And I go, well, if it's your pool, right, in your house, you would invite people to come over and come in your pool. I said, so now imagine, let's take somebody that's very popular like Oprah. Oprah gives you the invite of the century. You're allowed to come to our house for a barbecue and a pool party. You're so excited, you go and Oprah says, just dive in. And you get to the pool and it's green and it's murky and you can't see the bottom. And I'm like, do you all want to swim in that? And then I watch, I watch the people in the audience, you know? The cheerleaders who go like, yes, yes, yes, you know? And then you see other people who are like, yeah, I don't care whose pool that is, I'm not getting in, right? So the reality is, you don't want to swim in a murky green pool. You don't want to swim in something that's not like that.

• 1:37:52John Edward?

  It doesn't matter whose pool it is. You want to swim in a pool that's clear, you know? So when you think about the inviting of getting into someone's space and pool, if you've been invited into that space. You want to think about it from the perspective of, okay, I want to get into a pool that's clean and clear and it's inviting. But now if it's your pool, you want to keep it clean. You want to keep it. So your pool isn't going to stay clean without work. So you got to keep your pool clean. And the way that you do that is with your filter. So your brain is the filter. And your thoughts are the chemicals. So what you put into your filter in your pool is going to be what keeps it clean. And then you got to actively work at it. You got to skim it, you got to vacuum it. You know, you got to make sure the chemicals are regulated.

• 1:38:37John Edward?

  And every time somebody's in your pool. If you ever, if you ever, if anybody's ever had a pool, you know that the more people in it, the dirtier it's going to get. Sometimes you got to shock it, sometimes you got to keep people out of it, sometimes. You gotta put the cover on it, but you want to keep it cool. And most importantly, you gotta make sure nobody pees in your pool. And people look at me like, I can't believe you just said that in front of all these people. I'm like, there's no pissing in the pool. Right? And that is something that I'm very, very clear on. Who I let in my pool, who I will not let in my pool, whose pool I will go in, whose pool I will not go in.

• 1:39:07Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 1:39:08John Edward?

  You know, and my, my wife gets, gets a little cocky sometimes because I'm very, very clear about that.

• 1:39:12Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, me too. I love the, um, between lasagna and pools, I think everybody's finally gonna get this. To make sure those two analogies is really something I'll have to work on. But I gotta tell you, the pool thing, I told you this off camera too. My, my, uh, the, the amount of people in my pool is smaller than when I was younger. Because I am so conscious of protecting who's in it and I certainly don't let anybody in. And that's amazing to me, so many of you listening to this that have said, I want a better life. I want to change the external conditions of my life. But you won't change the internal conditions of your pool. You keep letting people pee in your pool constantly and somehow you think your life's gonna change. You have to change those components. And, and by the way, there are some people in our lives who were supposed to be in our lives for a certain time.

• 1:39:54John Edward?

  Right.

• 1:39:54Ed Mylett?

  Their energy served us at that time. There doesn't make them bad or good. It just means it's what it is.