Game 7 Baseball Magic, Josh Beats Pat, Seattle’s Rise, Cincy’s Fall, and Guess the Lines With Cousin Sal

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal to react to Week 9 of the NFL season. But first, they recap an all-time Game 7 as the Dodgers defeat the Blue Jays to win back-to-back World Series (05:04). Then, they discuss their Week 9 takeaways, including the Bills' win against the Chiefs (28:34). After, they get into Guess the Lines for Week 10 (01:14:34) and finish off with Parent Corner (01:34:48) ! Host: Bill SimmonsGuest: Cousin SalProducers: Jonathan Frias, Chia Hao Tat, and Eduardo Ocampo #ULTRACourtside could get you closer to the game! https://michelobultra.com/courtsideENJOY RESPONSIBLY 2025 ANHEUSER-BUSCH, MICHELOB ULTRA LIGHT BEER, ST. LOUIS, MO. The Ringer is committed to responsible gaming. Please visit⁠⁠ www.rg-help.com⁠⁠ to learn more about the resources and helplines available. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to you by Michelob Ultra. Excitement is in the air. That's right. It's the start of NBA season. I can't wait to get together with friends, share some Michelob Ultras and watch Tip Off. Plus, as the official beer sponsor of the NBA, Michelob Ultra is getting you closer to the action with experiences that make you feel like you're courtside to actual courtside tickets. Enter now for a chance to win at michelobultra.com/courtside. Michelob Ultra Courtside 26 to 27. No purchase necessary. Open to U.S. residents 21+ Begins on October 1st, 2026. Ends on June 30th, 2027. Multiple entry periods. See official rules at michelobultra.com/courtside for free entry, entry deadlines, prizes and details. The Bill Simmons Podcast brought to you by FanDuel Sportsbook. We're also brought

• 0:44Bill Simmons?

  to you by The Ringer Podcast Network. We have new rewatchables coming for you on Monday night. We did the Truman Show. We did it with me and Chris Ryan and a very, very special guest. It is a pretty famous celebrity. And, uh, you know, when we have the celebrities on, you never know how it's going to go, but this one went great. Really, really good. You're going to be surprised. So that's coming Monday night. Looking forward to that. Want to tell you about a new podcast that we are launching in November. And this is, this is a surprising one. It is a sports and culture podcast, but mostly sports with Max Kellerman and Rich Paul. And there's a whole story behind this that I can explain really

• 1:28Bill Simmons?

  quickly. I'm sure we'll talk more about this over the next couple of weeks, but, uh, I've wanted to work with Max for a long, long time. And when his ESPN stuff went the way that it did, and he was basically, um, he was on the sidelines there for almost a year and a half. And I was waiting, waiting for him to potentially, um, become available. And when it finally happened, we started talking after the, uh, after he did the Netflix boxing thing. And I was like, we gotta do something. He was like, well, I'm a little bit down the road with this other idea. And it was this show that he had been thinking about with, as it turned out, it was Rich Paul. And it was, they'd been friends for a while. They've always wanted to do something like a back and forth, kind of the, the kind of ringer

• 2:13Bill Simmons?

  type show that we would do, like conversation show, chemistry show. And, and I was like, Rich Paul? Like, he's running clutch. He's like an entrepreneur. He's doing all these different things. How is he gonna have time in the world without to do a podcast? So I did what I usually do in these situations. I just met with them and we went out to lunch and we talked for two hours. I didn't really know Rich that well. And I think, I think he didn't think I liked him. I didn't think he liked me. And that got hashed out in 10 minutes. And, and more importantly, just watching the way they interacted, I was, became convinced like, oh, these guys, I get it. These guys should have a show. So I think it's gonna be three days a week. It's gonna be sports. They might have some special guests. And,

• 2:56Bill Simmons?

  you know, Max, I don't have to sell you on, I think Max is great. I'm really excited to be in a situation where we came to kind of platform and the support. And I, I just always felt like if he was on the right team, he would crush. So give that piece. And then Rich's side, you know, he's obviously a really busy guy. He's got a lot of commitments. But there's a perspective that he has and a chemistry, especially with Max, that I think, I just think is really unique for a podcast and for a conversation that you'd want to listen to. If you think like, the whole concept of why a podcast would work is it's like, you're like a fly on a wall, listening to two people who really know their shit, talking about stuff. And you're just kind of there listening. And I think that's

• 3:36Bill Simmons?

  what, that's what he thinks too. That's what he wants to, to flip the sports talk thing on its head a little bit and bring some real, some real thought, perspective on sports, business, people, all these different things. And I think, I think we all feel pretty good about how that he can do a really good podcast that.

• 3:56Bill Simmons?

  That while also doing all these other jobs that he has. So I don't know. I'm going to trust my instincts on this one. When, when people have chemistry, that's usually what makes a podcast work. Over and over again, we've seen it back at Granland at the Ringer, all these different places. And this is one that I really think is going to be a cool podcast and I'm excited for, I'm excited for them. So we're going to be launching it later this year. It's going to be, or later this month, it's going to be a video podcast. Max Kellerman, Rich Paul, sports, guests, culture, all this stuff. And, and I think it's going to be really good. So stay tuned. We will have a feed. We'll have a bigger announcement. We'll have a launch date, all that stuff. So stay tuned for that. We're going to take a break on this podcast. We're going to bring Pearl Jam

• 4:41Bill Simmons?

  and then Cousin Sal and I are going to talk about week, week nine, week nine, week nine, NFL, and a lot of things happen. Stay tuned. This episode of the Bill Simmons Podcast is presented by State Farm. Having insurance isn't the same as having State Farm. It's like needing the protection, offensive guard on the football field, but getting an elementary school crossing guard. I had that last year with the Patriots. This year, I have actual protection. Sure, they're both guards, but you can only trust one to keep your quarterback safe when the game is on the line. So don't settle for just any insurance. When you can have State Farm, like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

• 5:45Bill Simmons?

  All right, live on a Sunday night. The BS Podcast, Cousin Sal is here. We're going to guess the lines. We're going to talk about a whole bunch of stuff. Right before we came on, Jaden Daniels got hurt. He looked like he dislocated his elbow.

• 5:56Speaker 01

  It's not our fault. Are you blaming us?

• 5:58Bill Simmons?

  No, I'm just saying, this is why we were delayed on YouTube. We were going to come earlier, but he went down and it did not look great. And it was not a great night for the Washington Commanders. We will talk about that later. I'm going to do something we've never done in 18 years of Guess the Lines.

• 6:12Speaker 01

  What's that?

• 6:13Bill Simmons?

  Start talking about another sport to start the podcast. We gotta go backwards.

• 6:19Speaker 01

  Not basketball, though. Not NBA, please.

• 6:20Bill Simmons?

  No, baseball. I want to talk baseball. I want to talk about last night. Dodgers going back to back. One of the great baseball games. I think of my lifetime and yours, right? That's on the, I don't know what the greatest is. I don't know. You know, I almost feel like it's actors. Like you could say Meryl Streep's the greatest actress ever, but if you said greatest actor, you could probably list six or seven. We've had some great baseball games in the World Series in our day, right? Jack Morris, that, that World Series, 07, Cleveland, Florida was awesome. The Arizona Yankees game was awesome. That 2016 Cubs game. Like, so there's been some good ones. This one had everything, though. And I think when you combine the other three losses, or the other two losses that Toronto had, I think

• 7:04Bill Simmons?

  this was a uniquely awful experience for Blue Jays fans. I can't come up with another loss like this, right? For the, the culmination started with the 18 inning game to now. So I want to start with the loss and then go to the win. But if that had been the Mets, where, would you be able to do the podcast tonight?

• 7:21Speaker 01

  No, I don't think so. Even a day removed. Yeah, it's, it's as bad as it gets. And you know, there was already the stink of game seven Toronto, right? For the city and the, the hockey team can never get past game seven. And it's one of those series where you think, wow, should they have just lost to Seattle in six? Like, would that have been better?

• 7:40Bill Simmons?

  Would that have been better for them emotionally?

• 7:41Speaker 01

  Showing up, like, and then up 3-2, and then up 3, 3-0 in game seven, which your Red Sox were up 3-0 to my Mets. You weren't home at the time, but it was really eerily reminiscent. I kept thinking of you. But, so you think this, you thought game seven was better than the, the one you went through, the 18 inning game? Or it's just the best game seven you've ever seen?

• 8:02Bill Simmons?

  I think I'm talking game sevens.

• 8:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 8:05Bill Simmons?

  With the drama of bringing in the baggage from the 18 inning game, from game six, when it seemed like they had it. They're bringing in glass now, basically, you know, they third and second, it just seems like there's something good's gonna happen for them and all of a sudden the game's over, guy gets doubled off, off second, announcers gloss over, I'm still trying to figure out why he drifted over that far on a ball that Kiki Kike caught like this.

• 8:28Speaker 01

  Right.

• 8:29Bill Simmons?

  But, uh, but then going up three, nothing, having it in the ninth, having Hoffman as this giant wart on your body that you're just hoping nobody picks. Oh, I had him in the ALK, I was just waiting for him to do that.

• 8:41Speaker 01

  Right.

• 8:41Bill Simmons?

  Um, and then who hits the homer to tie it? And then, uh, and then what happened? How the game ended? How the, the instant replay? Has, has there ever been a closer instant replay? Where the team didn't get it?

• 8:53Speaker 01

  A single cleat, and that's, look, with these seven game series, and you'll run into the same thing with a great basketball series, but when there's a series, unlike the Superbowl and like Atlanta fans will be like 28-3, I could point to 16 things that happened.

• 9:06Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 9:06Speaker 01

  But when you have like a nine or 10 day series and you lose so close, like you could point to a hundred things, like you, Blue Jays fans, I can't even imagine what they're going through. In that 18 inning game, there were six things, six base running errors that everybody made. And then as you talk about the cleat and the double play and, uh, it just, uh, well, was he leading off third too much? And now all these major league baseballs are coming to kind of a left of the fence. Like I, I, I don't even know what, how I'd be able to handle this as a Mets fan. It's as bad a loss as you'll find.

• 9:38Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I remember when I, when I wrote about the game six of the 86 World Series, one of the great moments of your life.

• 9:45Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, let's hear about this, yeah.

• 9:47Bill Simmons?

  All the different moments where the Red Sox could have finished the game off, right? And the, the reverse of that was when the Patriots came back against the Falcons 23. And I think it was like 15 plays where if any play had gone differently Atlanta's way, they win. Like most famously, the Julio Jones, when they had the catch, but then they somehow go backwards and have to punt, then kick a field goal. But there's a million of those. And I think those are the worst ones as sports fans. Those are the ones that still haunt me, like the, the Celtics in game four of the 87 finals, being up six with two minutes left. And I can still remember the entire sequence where we lost the lead, where it's just like that play, that play. And you just think about it. In a way, it's way worse than it is better to win. You're you're more haunted by the loss than you are.

• 10:32Speaker 01

  No question.

• 10:33Bill Simmons?

  The celebration of the win.

• 10:34Speaker 01

  You're just relieved. You're just relieved on your win. And then, you know, on top of all of that stuff, all the plays that came down to a quarter of an inch or this or that or this weird decision, they're up against like this Halloween zombie in Yamamoto, who pitched game two, game six, and like, all right, we've had enough of him. Game seven and like raises his hand to volunteer for games before that, too. Like, what the hell is going on here? How do you have such an intense force on the other side? And how do you keep combating that? And and they just couldn't, I guess.

• 11:07Bill Simmons?

  I that's never happened, right? Like, what was Baum Baumgartner, the situation with him at the Giants? It wasn't like the next day him pitching.

• 11:15Speaker 01

  No, I don't think so.

• 11:16Bill Simmons?

  Was it? I don't remember that. This was like, I just thought when somebody started a game and threw 90 plus pitches, we did not get to see that person the next day. That person's just scrawed. And Fox was never showing the available pitchers, which I don't understand. How that's not a graphic. We got to see the Joe Carter homer 397 times in the graphic and game winning homers and all this stuff. And they were so concerned with the history of everything and not just telling us like, here's here's who's left for the Dodgers. Kershaw, like Kershaw got up in extra innings. It was like, oh, my God, can you imagine?

• 11:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:51Bill Simmons?

  Can you imagine if he has to come in and pitch during this? But I felt so bad for the for the Blue Jays.

• 11:57Speaker 01

  The Kershaw, if Luke doesn't swing at ball four, Toronto wins that 18 inning game that you were at. By the way, congratulations for sticking it through. You're one of the big, one of the great Dodger fans out there, I think. I'd have to say at this point.

• 12:09Bill Simmons?

  It was great to be there with the other Dodger fits. Well, I was thinking the difference with this Blue Jays loss is the three together. I don't remember that in a seven game series for a baseball team before. Three horrible losses.

• 12:23Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 12:24Bill Simmons?

  The 18 inning game alone. Is like the worst loss you're gonna have in five years, right?

• 12:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, right.

• 12:29Bill Simmons?

  And then the, the blowing game six, when everybody goes there, everybody thinks they have it in the bag. And then it seems that multiple points during that game, they're gonna win that one. And then game seven, when they went up three, nothing, I remember that Cardinals, the World Series like in 85, when Andujar flipped out and

• 12:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 12:47Bill Simmons?

  The Royals just killed them like 11. I really started to wonder like, is this gonna be like a blowout? Or the Blue Jays just gonna kill them? Like the Dodgers, it felt like the Blue Jays were a slightly better team and the Dodgers were just gonna, they were hanging on, hanging on, doing it all in DNA and then eventually it was gonna run out. And then the longer the game went.

• 13:05Speaker 01

  Every two innings, they'd get a run and they'd come back there and for like to get beaten, it's one thing to like, they must've been like, what the fuck is going on here? Yamamoto is a robot. And then you got this guy who hasn't had a hit in a month. It's a home run against us to go ahead, right? And then the, the back to back plays with the cleat on the plate and then the, uh,

• 13:25Bill Simmons?

  How about the collision to end it in?

• 13:26Speaker 01

  Hernandez, it like, that was insane that that, that ball didn't drop. That ball drops 90 times out of 100.

• 13:34Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I don't know what the rankings are for me, but it's hard to think of a more dramatic game seven that just had like crazy plays. Like the collision play alone would have been, would have been enough to carry the craziness for the game, cause it's conceivable that just could have, ball could have dropped and they win the World Series that way.

• 13:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:54Bill Simmons?

  And that, and I'm, I'm positive that's never happened before.

• 13:57Speaker 01

  No, not like that.

• 13:59Bill Simmons?

  No, that's never happened.

• 14:00Speaker 01

  And then you think about it, like the Dodgers hit 204 in the series and they hit 203 last year against the Yankees and they won both and they won last year convincingly. And it's like, and, but there was still a million great plays to talk about, even though they couldn't put the bat on the ball for, you know, 80% of the time.

• 14:18Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that was the cool thing about game three, at least until when an extra innings was there were so many good defensive plays and base running plays and yeah, it's just this higher level of, of the sport and you start comparing your own team to it. Like I was texting on my Red Sox thread, I was like, How many, doesn't this make us feel like we're a million miles away from this Dodgers team? Like they have four starting pitchers that we don't have, you know, we have like no chance, we have no chance in a series like this. And, you know, some people were talking about how the Dodgers, well, they bought this and blah, blah, blah. And it's like, well, you know, Vlad did sign a $500 million contract. They're not exactly going against Hickory High here. Toronto, you know, Toronto is spending money too, and they're

• 14:59Bill Simmons?

  doing trade deadline stuff. The Dodgers piece of this though, back to back really matters to me, just as a sports fan and somebody who cares about this shit. I remember all the back to back teams, like the Yankees doing it in 77 and 78, and the Reds doing it right before them. And then the Blue Jays did it. We're all kind of pissed off because that was right when baseball was starting to change. We're like, oh, these motherfuckers, they kind of bought this a little bit. They had these hired guns. That's not, they didn't grow these players themselves. These weren't the homegrown stars. And then the Yankees, obviously, but to do two in a row, I just feel like the stakes are down. You must feel that way about the Cowboys. I know I feel that way about the Pats. Like to win two in a row, that second one's so much harder. Well, you won more than two in a row.

• 15:41Speaker 01

  Back in the day. Oh, I thought you meant looking forward. Yeah, yeah, it was great.

• 15:44Bill Simmons?

  Back to back is just like, it's just, it's a, you're, you're planting your flag on a different planet, right? And I think they sensed that and they understood it. And now they belong to this. Anyone can win one title, but you belong to a different kind of stratosphere, I think.

• 15:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, I agree. And it's like, and you feel good for these Dodgers fans and there's gonna be a parade and there's like fireworks all over the place. It's like, yeah, this is pretty great. And then our producer, Jack, is like, hey, my seven year old has seen three championships since he was a kid. I'm like, I get the hell out of here. I don't want to hear from you. Enough.

• 16:12Bill Simmons?

  Fuck off.

• 16:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, fuck off. I'll pull the David Chang and tell you to fuck off. No, we love Jack and his son, but it's enough championships.

• 16:19Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. No, listen, it's been a great, great run for them. Kershaw somehow got his last one. I'll never forget seeing him come into that 18 inning game and how nervous everybody was. And when they showed him in the bullpen, I'm sure all the Dodger fans were like, oh my God. On top of it, it was a Saturday night Halloween, which isn't unusual for the sport. Halloween obviously isn't on. On Saturday every year, but sometimes it is and sometimes it overlaps of the great baseball game. But the combo, at least out here, it was like Halloween parties, the Dodgers are involved, this game's going late. This was like a water cooler moment. I do feel like baseball is in a slightly different place in the mainstream than it was pre-COVID.

• 17:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 17:01Bill Simmons?

  Right? Like, something has shifted. The pitch clock, getting Otani and the Dodgers, having like big market teams that I think people know some of the players, the sport being enjoyable. I think, feel like kids, there's more kids kind of monitoring what's going on. The video game, I think, helps, but, but it just felt like, it felt like the sport we grew up with, I felt like.

• 17:24Speaker 01

  The pitch clock is great because you still would have been at that 18 inning game, that would have been a 40, you know, if there was no pitch clock. Greatest invention of our lifetime in sports, I think. And, uh, yeah. And you know what's sad? You say it's in a different place. It's going to be in a much different place next year when they strike. So that's gonna suck. Just, please try to get your shit together and ride the wave here because there's nothing better than baseball when it's played at the level we saw this last week.

• 17:49Bill Simmons?

  I'm glad you brought that up because we've seen them do this before with some of the worst timing ever for, for, uh, for just the two sides not being able to figure something out. I mean, the salaries are definitely gigantic and they are, I know the RSNs have shifted and all that stuff, but if, if they damage whatever has been rebuilt here over the last five years, that would just be, I don't know if a lot of people would come back from that.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  Shame, shame on them.

• 18:16Bill Simmons?

  I know 94, remember it took, it took a couple of years. It was really like some baby steps. It was like Ripken, um, that some of the big market teams got back involved, like the Yankees and the Red Sox got pretty good again. Pedro went to the Red Sox.

• 18:31Speaker 01

  It was kind of shitty until 97, until Sosa and the Wire.

• 18:35Bill Simmons?

  The steroids, the homer guys.

• 18:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, they needed, they needed that for sure, but.

• 18:41Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I felt like the Braves Yankees 96, that World Series was good. The Cleveland Florida, even though it was two weird teams, that World Series was awesome.

• 18:50Speaker 01

  Right.

• 18:50Bill Simmons?

  And then, uh, then we had the Bonds and Maguire and Sosa and all that stuff heading into the 90s. Red Sox versus Yankees. Like we had a really, and then all of a sudden it was back. And it feels like it's back now.

• 19:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:02Bill Simmons?

  So to, to blow this would just be unconscionable.

• 19:05Speaker 01

  Don't take it away. Don't do it. And by the way, next year is what? The Olympics? So, you know, uh, people will find something else to watch. They better not screw this up. They really better not.

• 19:15Bill Simmons?

  One other guy I wanted to shout out really quickly, the, the catcher in the Dodgers, Will Smith.

• 19:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:21Bill Simmons?

  Who caught all 18 innings in that game three and caught every inning of this series and then hits the, the game winning, uh, homer in game seven. And I know Yamamoto had to be the MVP, but it was, it almost feels like there should be an intercontinental championship MVP. There should be some sort of second thing that's awarded to somebody who just had a crazy impact on it. I think to, to watch him get up and, and, and then crouch and get up and crouch for seven solid hours. I was like, this guy's like, they're gonna have to send him to a fucking hospital in Germany to get him ready for game four. He never, never came out. It was unbelievable.

• 20:01Speaker 01

  Taking short hops to the thighs and everything, chasing pitches and everything. Yeah, that is, that was a tough gig. I felt that that way too. He should have shot up the MVP rankings after that game. And, uh, I mean, just the idea that just, it was just a few years ago, he was banned from the Academy Award. Oh no, that was a different one. Jeff Ross. It was, it's good to see Will Smith hitting something other than Chris Rock. I don't know. There's a million jokes.

• 20:27Bill Simmons?

  And then Otani, who at some point during game three, it felt like this was going to be one of the watershed months in, in pro sports history for an athlete. And then by the end of it, he was just kind of barely hanging out as a supporting cast member. You know, he got bailed out. He was out three, nothing. Seemed like he had multiple chances to get those runs back and couldn't. And, and then his team picked him up. But it was just, it was interesting to watch this week evolve. And then got, my guy Mookie was the other one who they had to move him back in the batting order because he was kind of killing him. But at the same time was, is just, it's just unbelievable to me that he plays shortstop. It's kind of from center to right to or right to center to second base to short side. There's never been a career like this.

• 21:10Speaker 01

  You have to do it if you're a Dodger.

• 21:11Bill Simmons?

  And then he gets the double play to end the, end the series.

• 21:13Speaker 01

  Just ear to ear smiles as soon as he fielded the ball. Like you did feel good for him. The one more thing I want to say about that 18 inning game, as great as that was, and that's the pinnacle of sports, 18 innings, and you see that guy Klein, who hadn't thrown 60 pitches through college and oh my God, he's just bowing these guys down, unbelievable. They're Dodgers 10th pitcher, that like the biggest difference between my team and you and the team that's in there. They have pitcher number 10 is throwing 99 on the corner, right? Like in the, and the announcers are barely mentioning it, but how that could have gone from great to absurd. If we saw your guy Mookie Betts pitching the 19th inning or the 20th inning, like that would have been ridiculous. Right? Like then you're like, ah shit, this sucks.

• 21:57Speaker 01

  Like, you know, imagine if Remondre Stevenson is the quarterback of the Patriots because the game went too long. You know, so it is amazing.

• 22:06Bill Simmons?

  Do you do like by the 18th inning, you put, start a guy on second base? I don't like, I don't think you could mess with the history of this.

• 22:13Speaker 01

  I did miss the ghost runner a little bit, a little bit.

• 22:17Bill Simmons?

  I mean, sitting there just watching everybody go just zeros for three solid hours was, you know, the boot has taken.

• 22:24Speaker 01

  A good idea, Otani, maybe the fourth time he was intentionally walked, he can get second base. Like, right? At least one more, one more base, you know? You're not allowed to throw the first so many times that they could fudge that rule a little bit.

• 22:38Bill Simmons?

  What's the most nerve wracking sport to you of all the sports is it baseball?

• 22:43Speaker 01

  I just think.

• 22:43Bill Simmons?

  For like situation like that, or is it hockey?

• 22:46Speaker 01

  No, it's.

• 22:47Bill Simmons?

  Is it sudden death hockey or is it like an extra innings, baseball game with everything at stake?

• 22:51Speaker 01

  It's, it's gotta be hockey because there's no, you're, okay, if your team's up at bat, you're not going to get scored on in baseball. Right? So you have that at least it's end to end Russian hockey. Like you could, you could be on a power play and get scored on in three seconds, you know? Because it's back and forth and back and forth. So it has to be hockey, but the way baseball is shot and directed and the way though, like, you know, a lot of times it's cold. The pitcher blowing on his hand, they go to the dugout, the shots to the fans. You cannot match that intensity because you have so much time in between pitches.

• 23:24Bill Simmons?

  Baseball also has that unbelievable piece where it's like bases loaded. The guy throw, it's like two and oh count.

• 23:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:32Bill Simmons?

  And the announcer does the, there's nowhere to put him. And you're like, yeah, there really isn't. There's nowhere to put him.

• 23:37Speaker 01

  Right, right.

• 23:39Bill Simmons?

  And hockey, I guess the version of that is the five on four, the five on three power play in OT. I still feel like I've been in the house for great games in every sport. I've never seen a game seven of the World Series in person. But I still think in football, when it's really, when it's like final two minutes and every play is moment, it just feels the most momentous and they're coming to the line and it's like third and eight. And it's like, if we get a stop here, we might actually win the Super Bowl. There's a different kind of energy with that.

• 24:11Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 24:11Bill Simmons?

  You know?

• 24:12Speaker 01

  Neil O'Donnell was driving towards the end zone I was in, in the Cowboys Steelers Super Bowl. And I remember thinking, I'm gonna have a stroke. I'm like, you know, I'm, I'm 24 years old here and I'm just gonna stroke out here in the upper deck and that's gonna be it. So, yeah, there are situations where it does look like they're actually coming for you.

• 24:30Bill Simmons?

  I think the single most exciting thing that can happen to a fan in sports is the come from behind homerun.

• 24:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:38Bill Simmons?

  The like Henderson, Dave Henderson in the 1986 American League Championship Series, when we were down three, one of the Angels, down three runs in the ninth inning. And then he hit a homer off of Donimore to tie it. I still think that's the most excited I've ever been by anything that's happened. Like just a single play, just where you, it's basically like you get a second, you get a second life like in a video game. Like somebody just gives you a quarter and you get to keep playing. You're like, oh my God. The most famous one when I was a kid was the Bernie Carbo homerun in the Carlton Fisk game.

• 25:09Speaker 01

  Right.

• 25:09Bill Simmons?

  It took it from six, three to six, six. But the, the homerun in the ninth by Rojas, the, the classic, like you just want him to get on base. You're not thinking he's gonna go deep. And then it's like, oh my God, that, oh, it's out. And it's just like you blackout, basically.

• 25:25Speaker 01

  And you know why it's great in baseball? Cause unlike any sport, it's, there's no hiccup. It's not gonna get called back for a holding, right? It's not gonna get, as long as it doesn't wrap around the foul pole, you don't have to worry about anything. That's a homerun. He's just gotta touch the bases and you're good, you know? You have to worry about a penalty kick or offsides or anything bullshit.

• 25:44Bill Simmons?

  What's your greatest homerun? What's your favorite one for, for the Mets? The one that made you blackout?

• 25:49Speaker 01

  I think I have to say Dykshire against the Astros in that playoff series. Yeah, that was pretty awesome, but there were a few against you.

• 25:56Bill Simmons?

  Every fanbase has one of them. Well, the Blue Jays, I, I feel bad for the fans, but 32 years. They, they were playing that up and it's, I, I can't tell if that's long or maybe we're just old. Cause I told her, I remember when they won in 92 or 93. It's like, all right, they did go back to back in the nineties. Like this isn't, this isn't the Cubs.

• 26:16Speaker 01

  Right? Yeah. I just think, uh, they, they especially want to give it to America here. That, that also helped in 2025, but yeah, 30 years is nothing. Try being a Cowboys fan. Run about that same thing.

• 26:31Bill Simmons?

  Well, it was almost the worst weekend in the history of Canada because the Bills almost blew the Chiefs game. I consider the Bills a Canadian team. I was thinking about, uh, R L Hawani, who comes on this pod a lot, who I'm friendly with. Um, he's, his three teams are the Knicks, the Bills.

• 26:50Bill Simmons?

  And the, uh, and the Blue Jays.

• 26:52Speaker 01

  Oh, wow.

• 26:53Bill Simmons?

  So, yeah. So just in 2025, we were texting about this earlier. He had the Bills loss in January. He had that fucking crazy Knicks Pacers series with that Halliburton game, which is the most improbable basketball loss, you know, maybe ever. Right? And then you have, uh, this Blue Jays going against, uh, going against the Dodgers. Losing like three horrible stomach punch losses in a row.

• 27:19Speaker 01

  That's a hundred seasons of, of no winning. Yeah, that's so good.

• 27:24Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, he's basically like, I might not have gone to work this week. Do you remember after the Aaron Boone game? I, I left Jimmy show the next day.

• 27:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:32Bill Simmons?

  I left at like one o'clock. I was, I honestly felt like physically ill. I couldn't, I, I couldn't, we were, I was supposed to write jokes. I wanted to like, put my head in an oven.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  We also were recording you clandestinely and you're like, fuck you. I'm going to quit this job if you play that on TV.

• 27:48Bill Simmons?

  I did get mad.

• 27:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, you were very upset.

• 27:51Bill Simmons?

  We'll take a break for the pod. We'll keep going on the YouTube. This episode is brought to you by Michelob Ultra, the official beer partner of the NBA. So the NBA season is starting. I'm excited about a bunch of different things. We have a lot of, a lot of teams up in the air. Boston, Milwaukee, Indiana, what are we getting from these teams? The Lakers, can they hang on and still be a top six team? I think I'm most excited for the Texas teams. I want to see Duran in Houston, Cooper flag in Dallas, and Wemby and Dylan Harper in San Antonio. I feel like I'm going to be spending a lot of time in the state of Texas with my basketball choices. There are a lot of moments worth playing for. The ones that taste best are served cold, unlike in Texas where it's usually hot.

• 28:33Bill Simmons?

  Whatever happens this season, catch every moment with Michelob Ultra, the official beer partner of the NBA. Getting fans closer to the game with a chance to win courtside seats. You heard me correctly, a trip to All-Star Weekend, custom merch, and much more. Michelob Ultra, superior is worth playing for. Enter now at michelobultra.com/courtside. Michelob Ultra Courtside 2025 to 2026, no purchase necessary. Open to U.S. residents, 21 plus, begins on October 1st, 2025, ends on June 30th, 2026. Multiple entry periods. See official rules at michelobultra.com/courtside for free entry, entry deadlines, prizes, and details. NFL, where do you want to start? You want to start Bills, KC?

• 29:18Speaker 01

  I mean, I just start with me, the gambling gods just said, hey, enjoy your Yamamoto MVP winnings. We're going to take it away from you and then some. And if you're, that's it. If your great uncle leaves you anything in his will, we're going to take that too. F'ing Packers, Lions, just the worst.

• 29:35Bill Simmons?

  Well, we were worried. We did say the favorites had done really well the last couple of weeks. And we were a little worried about the parlays teaser train. There were a lot of obvious ones. And the ones that were the big letdowns today were the Packers and the Lions. I gotta say, I didn't have the Packers on the multi-view.

• 29:52Speaker 01

  Really? Oh, not on the multi-view?

• 29:54Bill Simmons?

  Wow. I didn't, I had six games going and they were one of the two that didn't crack it. And I didn't put it on until the fourth quarter.

• 30:00Speaker 01

  Good for you.

• 30:01Bill Simmons?

  I kept waiting for the, for them to all of a sudden to be up 20 to six. And it just never happened. And I, and obviously saw, I saw that awful fourth and eight from the 13. I don't know, would Jordan love just whipping it into the end zone?

• 30:16Speaker 01

  Was that the worst pass ever? Like, was it the worst pass ever?

• 30:19Bill Simmons?

  Really bad.

• 30:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:20Bill Simmons?

  They didn't ever punt it. How do you score 13 points and not punt?

• 30:24Speaker 01

  They didn't punt. They scored 13 points. The opposing quarterback at 102 yards passing and no touchdowns and interception. And if I, if you would have told me that much, I would have taken a second mortgage out on the, on the family home here. But it didn't, but yeah, that fourth and eight, are we going to start with this game? Because I just like they, I think these coaches are getting a little ridiculous with not kicking. Like fourth and eight from the 13 with 11 minutes left, you're down seven?

• 30:50Bill Simmons?

  Reid did it on the fourth and 17 and it actually worked, which I didn't understand that one either. That's just a lot of trust in my home.

• 30:56Speaker 01

  They weren't like 11. You have to score in twice anyway. Like, I don't know. Even Atlanta passing on the field goal in your game was weird, but I know it worked, but

• 31:06Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 31:06Speaker 01

  I don't know, man. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know why you go for it there. So much bad shit.

• 31:10Bill Simmons?

  Packers. I think the Packers have had the biggest swerve over the last week because everyone's feeling awesome about them after that Pittsburgh game. They lose to home in Carolina. It's 13 and a half point favorites, which I'm going to say will be the biggest favorite to lose a game this year. Like usually we get over 10 points. That happens, what? Four or five, four times maybe all year. 13 and a half is like, that's like once every couple of years.

• 31:37Speaker 01

  It's the biggest since 2023. Titans, Miami. Yeah.

• 31:40Bill Simmons?

  So I'm right.

• 31:40Speaker 01

  And tied for their largest upset loss since 1970. I don't know.

• 31:45Bill Simmons?

  The funny thing is they, they've done this in the LaFleur era. They, they play three really shitty games each year and you don't know when they're going to happen. And this was obviously one of them. But then the other big thing is they, it seems like they lost Tucker Kraft for the year.

• 32:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, that looks bad.

• 32:01Bill Simmons?

  He hurt his knee and they, they were doing the thing like, it's not good. Like, how's Tucker Kraft's knee? Not good. They, when they do, when they open with the not good or it's like, hey, we'll see. You know, MRI tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed. When they do the not good, that means it's bad.

• 32:15Speaker 01

  They think it's MCL and ACL. So, uh, yeah, that's, that's bad for him. He's a fun player.

• 32:20Bill Simmons?

  Well, I thought he was their best and most reliable third down guy, most reliable red zone guy. So that changes their destiny. And now on the flip side, Carolina's in the playoff picture.

• 32:31Speaker 01

  Five and four.

• 32:32Bill Simmons?

  They're five and four. They played New Orleans and Atlanta the next two weeks. So we could have the Carolina could be seven and four in two weeks and the Bears could be seven and three. And those teams aren't good.

• 32:47Speaker 01

  Right.

• 32:48Bill Simmons?

  Right? I mean, nobody thinks the Bears are good. Is anybody getting offended by that?

• 32:52Speaker 01

  It's funny. When we went over who's going to be the seventh NFC team, we settled on the Niners and you put together that parlay and it was like, what, plus 340? And then the Niners spanked the Giants. I'm like, God, that's looking good. But I didn't realize, I'm like, oh shit, the Panthers are in the picture here. What is going, is that really going to, now the Bears are back in it. So.

• 33:11Bill Simmons?

  Let's go, let's go to the, the big game, the Buffalo, Kansas City game where Josh Allen beats Mahomes. He's five and one in the regular season against Mahomes, but Mahomes has won every playoff meeting. I was trying to think of like a real life example of what this is like. Yeah. Like, there is no example. It's like, you don't really get to brag about it, but it's also not nothing. And then you think about the four playoff wins they had. One of them was the 13 seconds game where Allen did everything you could possibly do to win the game.

• 33:47Speaker 01

  Is there a guy who wins a non-title match all the time? And then, then the wrestling?

• 33:50Bill Simmons?

  Oh, like in wrestling?

• 33:51Speaker 01

  Goes up against magnificent Morocco and he just pins him four minutes at the medal lens?

• 33:56Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. So he's repeatedly winning the non-title matches, not the actual pay-per-view matches. I do think watching that confirms something I've been saying all year is I, I just think Josh is slightly better than Mahomes for whatever reason right now. And I think the difference is the, the inside the five yard line stuff and the fourth and short stuff. I think Allen is just the best guy in the league. That, that there's the tush push in the NFC, I get it. But I just think Allen is getting into the end zone when you're inside the five. And Mahomes, they've never QB sneaked him. Since he got hurt that time.

• 34:30Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 34:30Bill Simmons?

  And over and over again, you see you like you can actually do a goal line stand against them because you never have to worry about the QB sneak because they just won't do it. They're always trying to cheat around it or ram cream hunt in the middle or do these little quick outs. And I think it's easy to play a team when you know they're never going to QB sneak. The Raiders lost today because Lawrence ended up QB sneaking, what, two times in a row to get it finally?

• 34:51Speaker 01

  Well, because they're the Raiders, but yes.

• 34:53Bill Simmons?

  Well, and they're the Raiders.

• 34:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, those things. Yeah, I think like they have to be extra creative down by the goal line. They don't have, you're right, they don't have the luxury of what like the Bills do in some of these other, even like the Falcons could ram it in or Seattle as we saw. But yeah, they have to do like the shovel pass to Kelsey or something weird over the middle because they won't.

• 35:12Bill Simmons?

  The guy in motion who does the quick 45 degree angle, Tyree kill play.

• 35:16Speaker 01

  Yep, yep. Yeah, Rashi Rice running it in. But yeah, I mean, they, what was he held to under 50% passing? Like this is, this Bills defense, I, I think we're at a good spot here with some of these defenses getting better, right? Like we worried about the Bills defense. Who was the other terrible, like even the Steelers defense stepped up. I didn't expect that to happen. The Ravens.

• 35:37Bill Simmons?

  Why would you? They were terrible last week. They gave up 20 straight passes.

• 35:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, but the Steelers, Bills and Ravens might play defense now and could lead to like some fun AFC games.

• 35:47Bill Simmons?

  Well, you know, it's fun. KC is the eight seed right now.

• 35:50Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 35:51Bill Simmons?

  I mentioned that because there's only seven playoff seeds in each conference.

• 35:54Speaker 01

  You don't think they'll change that? Goodell will change that, change that to eight.

• 35:57Bill Simmons?

  Be interesting if they change that in like week 12. Hey, we have an idea, 16 team playoff brackets. I'd be remiss if I didn't mention, Sal.

• 36:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:08Bill Simmons?

  The Patriots with Tom Brady as the starter.

• 36:13Bill Simmons?

  Only started five and four twice in 2001 and 2002. 2001, he didn't even start the first three games. 2002, they finished nine and seven. And then after that, never again. Brady had 13 Patriot seasons of four losses or less. And after 2002, never finished worse than 11 and five. So everybody can. Take a big heaping sip of settle down juice in the goat discussion. Tom Brady is, we're still good. Yeah, we're still good. We're still fine. Yeah.

• 36:44Speaker 01

  Oh, Brady is not the goat?

• 36:46Bill Simmons?

  No, he is the goat.

• 36:47Speaker 01

  Oh, he is. But we have to settle down? Okay.

• 36:50Bill Simmons?

  He's the goat. Settle down.

• 36:52Speaker 01

  I don't know what you're saying.

• 36:53Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I see. Settle down.

• 36:54Speaker 01

  Oh, I see what you're saying. Oh, he is the goat. Okay. All right. I didn't know if you were, you were, you were putting, it's fine.

• 37:00Bill Simmons?

  Win a few more Super Bowls, maybe don't start the season five and four and we can throw you in the goat combo.

• 37:05Speaker 01

  I see what you're saying.

• 37:06Bill Simmons?

  Maybe be Josh Allen.

• 37:07Speaker 01

  Comparing him to the current Patriots. I would totally misread that. Yeah.

• 37:11Bill Simmons?

  This one had a funny one though. McDermott, they're up seven. There's like 30 seconds left. Chiefs have no timeouts. They're on like the 36 yard line. And he decides to try to kick a field goal to go up 10, misses it. All of a sudden the Chiefs have the ball back.

• 37:28Speaker 01

  You punt? You punt there?

• 37:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I punt. They, you're not going 90 yards in 20 seconds. It's not happening. Just punting out of bounds.

• 37:34Speaker 01

  Well, it was 27 seconds left, fourth and like.

• 37:38Bill Simmons?

  Just putting it out of bounds.

• 37:39Speaker 01

  Yeah. Oh, man.

• 37:40Bill Simmons?

  What do you want? Give them the ball at the 40? Like, that's doable. And I can get a pass interference. I can get Kelsey over the middle. I can down it like, it's conceivable. I can get score in three plays.

• 37:49Speaker 01

  Right. Yeah. Yeah. Those just always go into the, right into the end zone, but I guess it wouldn't matter from the 20 with the, with your own 20 with 20 seconds left. You're right. I mean, we've seen Mahomes do it, but that was probably, but the kick just missed, then thank God, because we had teasers all over the place with.

• 38:03Bill Simmons?

  Oh, my God. Yeah. I had the Bills to win the game. And then at halftime, I did the, the Chiefs money line. The Chiefs were, were winning by a point in the second half and that was.

• 38:14Speaker 01

  We were doing a little chase and little Jamar chasing after those Lions lost.

• 38:20Bill Simmons?

  Can you, you mentioned that thing about the punting.

• 38:24Bill Simmons?

  So I thought the same thing. They're not going to do it because these teams always kick it in the end zone.

• 38:31Bill Simmons?

  What the fuck do these punters do all day and practice every day?

• 38:34Speaker 01

  Right.

• 38:34Bill Simmons?

  Like, how many things are there to practice? It's like, alright, we're in a practice, where you punt it as far as you can. And then I thought we'd practice when you angle the punts and they don't go in the end zone. What are the other, I guess you're practicing a fake punt play every, what do punters do all day? They can't just direct a punt into the, I feel like when we were kids, punters could do this routinely. Now, nobody, it's like how nobody can bunt anymore in baseball.

• 39:01Speaker 01

  Right. Well, bunting was taken out of, yeah, right, exactly. Yeah, but yes, the coffin corner, or at least kick it out at a bat.

• 39:07Bill Simmons?

  Corner.

• 39:08Speaker 01

  What are you doing? You're, you're turning your body a little bit, right? And then aiming it not directly at the sideline, but 25 yards downfield and then down the sideline, so.

• 39:17Bill Simmons?

  These guys, it's their only job. It's not like they're also doing five other things and bartending at night. And it's like, this is a real job where they make multiple millions a year. They don't know how to do a coffin corner punt?

• 39:27Speaker 01

  Kills their net, though. Kills their net stats. And then when you go to renegotiate, it's not good. I think it's like the, but now it doesn't matter, like the basketball player taking a three with two seconds left, the full court goes against the stats.

• 39:41Bill Simmons?

  Well, KC's the eight seed. They're two behind Denver. And here's what they have left, Sal. Five and four. Bye week next week at Denver. Like a real chance to be five and five. Home for Indianapolis, at Dallas, home Houston, home Chargers, at Tennessee, home Denver, at Vegas. So they played Denver twice. And they already have four losses. And I think their over under for the season was 12 and a half, I'm gonna say.

• 40:08Speaker 01

  Yeah. I'm not doing this, though. They'll go under 12 and a half for sure, because they can't.

• 40:13Bill Simmons?

  But what, what does that feel like to you? 11 and 6? They're still making the playoffs.

• 40:16Speaker 01

  But 10 and 7, I think even makes it, right? Do they have odds here? Yeah. I gotta look here now. This is bad.

• 40:22Bill Simmons?

  It feels like there's two more losses in there.

• 40:24Speaker 01

  We can't, it's not gonna be against the Cowboys on Thanksgiving, but what do you think they are to make the playoffs?

• 40:33Bill Simmons?

  I would say minus 240.

• 40:34Speaker 01

  You see, it's, it's minus 650. They're not gonna let anybody steal money.

• 40:41Speaker 01

  Who's the seven seed? You said they were eighth.

• 40:44Bill Simmons?

  Well, Jacksonville's in there now.

• 40:48Bill Simmons?

  Just saying.

• 40:48Speaker 01

  I guess Jacksonville does have the head to head, right?

• 40:51Bill Simmons?

  They're five and three. They've beaten KC.

• 40:54Speaker 01

  Right.

• 40:56Bill Simmons?

  And they have rest of the way.

• 41:00Bill Simmons?

  They play the Titans twice. That could be seven wins.

• 41:04Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 41:05Bill Simmons?

  They play the Jets, that's eight. They're at Cardinals. Next week, they play the Texans, probably lost. But yeah, there, there's a path for them to get to 10.

• 41:14Speaker 01

  Next week, they might, might be Davis Mills.

• 41:15Bill Simmons?

  That could be.

• 41:16Speaker 01

  They might be against Davis Mills next week. I would say he's 50 50, Stroud.

• 41:22Bill Simmons?

  Can we talk about that game?

• 41:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, let's do it.

• 41:24Bill Simmons?

  That was my worst loss of the day. I had the Texans, Stroud got concussed.

• 41:32Bill Simmons?

  And then apparently D'Amico Ryan's got concussed with about two minutes left because.

• 41:38Speaker 01

  114.

• 41:39Bill Simmons?

  Boot, Boot and Rally Bo Nix did it again. He, he, he got, he got hammered for the first two hours of the game. He passed out. He threw up all over the American flag on the wall, standing next to him and threw up all, he had diarrhea. They threw him in a shower. They gave him a cup of coffee and Boot and, Boot and Rally Bo came back out for the next, next hour. Two touchdown drives, ties the game. And Houston gets the ball on their own 13 with a minute and 14 left. Tie game. Denver has two timeouts and I'm sitting there going, okay. Handoff, handoff. Third handoff.

• 42:19Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 42:19Bill Simmons?

  You punt it back, they have 10 seconds left, let's go to overtime. You have Davis Mills as your quarterback. You've scored three points since he came into the game. You're not going 60 yards against Denver's defense and saying.

• 42:29Speaker 01

  Can I add one more wrinkle?

• 42:31Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 42:31Speaker 01

  His back is to the end zone. The lighting in those Texas stadiums are so weird and you get in the daylight right in his face. And you know, it's, it's like fragmented daylight. And so he's got to look into the sun while throwing downfield. Take it from there. Tip, what are the three plays they do?

• 42:48Bill Simmons?

  Incomplete pass on first down to Christian Kirk. Just didn't even start the clock. There, it goes five seconds, stops.

• 42:55Speaker 01

  Right.

• 42:56Bill Simmons?

  Jaden Higgins, four yard pass. And Higgins, for some reason goes out of bounds. So we really want you guys to have two timeouts.

• 43:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:05Bill Simmons?

  Third and six, incomplete pass, putting it back to you. Fifty five yard punt return for eight in Denver has the ball with two timeouts thinking with a minute left. They ran 14 seconds off the clock and other than that Brian Callahan when he called. What was that thing when he called a timeout and they were going to kick the field goal and then it was a delay of game after they called the timeout.

• 43:27Speaker 01

  That was good.

• 43:28Bill Simmons?

  The delay of game after the timeout. That was the worst coaching moment of the year.

• 43:31Speaker 01

  They should fire him again.

• 43:32Bill Simmons?

  This is the new worst coaching moment of the year because Houston needed the game like they they they don't have a lot of room for error now. And anyway, Denver wins the game and it was the first time where I was like, are we sure D'Amico Ryans is a good coach? Cause this was bad.

• 43:47Speaker 01

  You had Texas. I'd be pissed too if I had the Texans, but I stayed away. I just like this.

• 43:51Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 43:52Speaker 01

  Whoever gets, I thought whoever got the 17 first wins and that's kind of how it was, but 34 minutes to 25 minutes time of possession for Houston.

• 43:59Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 44:01Speaker 01

  Denver had one, one interception and one fumble. They had fewer total yards. Houston was just three for 17 on third down and it was because they had Davis Mills like they obviously won the game with CJ Stroud, I would think.

• 44:14Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 44:14Speaker 01

  At this point, but just the same roll the dice in overtime. What the hell are you thinking there?

• 44:20Bill Simmons?

  Hey, you're home. Denver's special teams was awful. And Bo Nix was awful for two solid hours. There was like near the end of the second, I was going against him in our fantasy league. Near the end of the second quarter, he was minus 1.85. That was his fantasy total. And in the fourth quarter, I think he was at five points.

• 44:37Speaker 01

  Right.

• 44:37Bill Simmons?

  And then finally rallied, but uh, that's it for the Texans. I mean, I'm not ready to make them a cross offs team, but right now they are, let's see, three and five.

• 44:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:50Bill Simmons?

  They have, uh, the Titans only once. They still have a Bills game on, on Thursday night. They still have at Colts, at Chiefs, at Chargers and the Colts again.

• 45:02Speaker 01

  Right.

• 45:02Bill Simmons?

  I like to, it's not, it's a cross off and pencil. Right? Not in pen, but I think in pencil.

• 45:10Speaker 01

  They have to sweep.

• 45:11Bill Simmons?

  That team's not going, that team's not going seven and two down the stretch.

• 45:13Speaker 01

  Sweep the Colts. Yeah. I mean, they're not grabbing a wild card, right? So they have to steal that division somehow, boy, and it's, it's not looking good. Especially if he doesn't start next week, but Denver is, are they the full of shit champs of the world? Like this team, I think they're decent sometimes, but

• 45:30Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 45:31Speaker 01

  They beat Cam Ward, they beat Jake Browning, they beat Justin Fields, they beat Jackson Dart, they beat Davis Mills. I mean, that is.

• 45:38Bill Simmons?

  There's something to be said for turning it on in fourth quarters and kind of rising to the occasion. But I also think it's the team, like when we're doing over unders next August.

• 45:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 45:48Bill Simmons?

  They would jump out to us as the fullest shit team.

• 45:50Speaker 01

  Right.

• 45:51Bill Simmons?

  Like, look at this. They went 12 and 5. They were 8 and 1 in, you know, last two minute games.

• 45:58Speaker 01

  Well, we liked them this year because they were 1 and 6 in one score games last year.

• 46:02Bill Simmons?

  We liked them a lot. I picked them to win the division.

• 46:04Speaker 01

  Gone too much the other way.

• 46:06Bill Simmons?

  I was happy because I have a lot of Broncos over unders. I was upset because I thought Texans, I just think if Stroud doesn't get hurt, I think, I think this is a win. I don't know what happened. One thing I will say, they blew a couple deep passes. They're vaunted secondary. Denver got behind them a couple of times and that was the difference because they didn't really do anything else. And then the, uh, speaking of AFC South teams, Steelers Colts. So the Steelers have six turnovers, which means against the Colts and the Patriots, the Steelers forced 11 turnovers.

• 46:42Bill Simmons?

  So if you want to talk about fullest shit teams, maybe start there with the, with the short passes and just, let's just get a turnover every 40 minutes against teams we're playing. I feel like it would make so much more sense if they played in New Orleans and were just like the, the official voodoo Steelers where we're like, oh, there's some actual voodoo shit going on.

• 47:03Speaker 01

  Aaron Rodgers injures his hand before the game. The line doesn't move, but then it does move. Yeah. Very weird.

• 47:10Bill Simmons?

  The Colts are up 7-0. Steelers are doing nothing.

• 47:15Bill Simmons?

  Steelers punt.

• 47:17Bill Simmons?

  Punt bounces, hits the Colts kick punt returner and rolls right to a Steelers. And that was it. You're like, oh, okay. Here we go. Here, this is, by the way, that happens three times a year.

• 47:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:29Bill Simmons?

  When the dumb kick returner just stand for some reason, just is like, hey, there's the ball. It's right next to me and gets hit by it.

• 47:37Speaker 01

  Playing Renegade, it's over. Yeah, that was it. I, I don't, how much less do you think of Daniel Jones? I, I, um, I knew he was due for something like this, but then the team was, I'm still okay with them. I still would be very surprised if they blew that division.

• 47:55Bill Simmons?

  So they're outdoors.

• 47:56Speaker 01

  Minus 240.

• 47:58Bill Simmons?

  They're playing the Voodoo Steelers.

• 48:01Bill Simmons?

  Jones looked like 2024 Giants Jones. I mean, he was bad. It wasn't just the turnovers. He was actually like just bad the whole game. Like he missed, he had Pierce open on a deep one once that he's been hitting all year and overthrew it.

• 48:15Speaker 01

  And right.

• 48:16Bill Simmons?

  He just was not the guy from the first couple of months. I was rooting against them even though I had money on them by like 1115 for, because I started thinking about the Pats on the one seed. Like really started thinking about it.

• 48:28Speaker 01

  Look at you.

• 48:29Bill Simmons?

  Well, I got excited about it.

• 48:30Speaker 01

  What a great world this is.

• 48:32Bill Simmons?

  Indy, rest of the way, Atlanta bye week, at KC, home Houston, at Jacksonville, at Seattle. San Francisco, Jacksonville, at Houston. So Houston twice and then at KC at Seattle. So they're seven and two.

• 48:49Bill Simmons?

  12 and five is conceivable. I don't think anything higher than that.

• 48:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, I think.

• 48:52Bill Simmons?

  13 and four, 12 and five somewhere in there.

• 48:54Speaker 01

  Maybe 11, maybe 11. But yeah, I don't, they can't blow it. Minus 240. I'm just trying to look at these other odds. I wouldn't take any other team to seal that division.

• 49:03Bill Simmons?

  I would not either.

• 49:06Bill Simmons?

  Well, and then we have, well, we should talk about the Seahawks quickly. Cause they just absolutely destroyed Washington. They're six and two, could be eight now. They were first in DVOA heading into this game and this was the best game they put all year. Darnold's on a heater.

• 49:21Bill Simmons?

  You look at their schedule the rest of the way.

• 49:25Bill Simmons?

  Their toughest road game is at Chargers in two weeks. Al's not going to probably be playing in that. At San Francisco to end the season or at Atlanta. It's, it's a pretty cream puffy schedule. And I think there's a real case now for them to be the one seed. What do they have one seed odds for them yet?

• 49:43Speaker 01

  They're very solid.

• 49:43Bill Simmons?

  On Fanduel?

• 49:44Speaker 01

  I mean, they're not even favored to win the division. Yeah, they're plus 150.

• 49:49Bill Simmons?

  Plus 150 for a division?

• 49:50Speaker 01

  For the division, yeah. I don't think they have, I mean, they have.

• 49:53Bill Simmons?

  They don't have the one seed bet? Yeah, they do.

• 49:54Speaker 01

  Thought they did.

• 49:55Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, they're plus 470 for the one seed.

• 49:58Speaker 01

  And they look great tonight.

• 49:59Bill Simmons?

  Rams are plus 380. I think they're better than the Rams. Personally.

• 50:05Speaker 01

  I think so too.

• 50:06Bill Simmons?

  On a neutral field, I would pick the Seahawks.

• 50:08Speaker 01

  I don't know, but is Washington a team like we should be? First of all, we should probably, I'm okay crossing them off, especially with, right? That's our next cross off. It's Mariota the rest of the year. They're not going to get much better. Right? They have an angry Lions team, Broncos, Eagles in the next five weeks. They have to be a cross off, but.

• 50:27Bill Simmons?

  I had two cross offs for you actually, because I think Arizona is a cross off now.

• 50:31Speaker 01

  Oh, you don't even want to see them beat the Cowboys by three touchdowns?

• 50:34Bill Simmons?

  No, because I think, I think the NFC West, moving away from them like it has, I don't see a scenario where.

• 50:41Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 50:42Bill Simmons?

  They climb back. We basically have to have, they'd have to flip places with one of the three teams and I don't see it.

• 50:48Speaker 01

  Right.

• 50:48Bill Simmons?

  They have to make up three wins because we're going to have at least two from the NFC North. So I have for cross offs, Jets, Browns, Tennessee, Miami, New Orleans, Vegas, Cleveland, the Giants, Arizona and Washington.

• 51:03Speaker 01

  Washington.

• 51:04Bill Simmons?

  That's 10.

• 51:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, let's do it. We're almost there.

• 51:06Bill Simmons?

  That's fair, right? We're heading into week 10. We have 10 cross offs.

• 51:09Speaker 01

  So it's 22 teams and how many?

• 51:11Bill Simmons?

  22 teams for 16 spots.

• 51:13Speaker 01

  26 spots.

• 51:13Bill Simmons?

  Or 14 spots.

• 51:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, 14 spots. Yeah. They look, they look so damn good, Seattle. And the only good part of the game really interesting was Collinsworth. Well, he was like, Darnold, you said he was on the heater. It was like 16 for 16, 17 for whatever he was and Collinsworth circles the defensive line for Washington and is like, do you know how hard it is to have these monsters chasing you? He said mon- monsters.

• 51:38Bill Simmons?

  Monsters?

• 51:39Speaker 01

  It's like, it's a pass rush variation, but I'm like, all right, that's just a, that's a speech thing.

• 51:45Bill Simmons?

  Monsters.

• 51:46Speaker 01

  Yeah. They're so damn good.

• 51:49Bill Simmons?

  Darnold, that turned out to be the move of the year. We thought it was going to be a wash and it was going to be an interesting argument over the course of the year, Darnold versus Gino.

• 51:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:59Bill Simmons?

  And we were like, oh, I'll be changing our minds on this one nine times. It's like, nope.

• 52:03Speaker 01

  I was talking about with someone else and Darnold and Baker make so many teams look bad for passing on them in free agency. Right? And just not, we're not sticking with them. But imagine if those guys didn't pan out. We'd have two more teams with terrible quarterbacks.

• 52:17Bill Simmons?

  Oh, my God.

• 52:18Speaker 01

  This league would suck so bad.

• 52:20Bill Simmons?

  Jesus.

• 52:22Bill Simmons?

  I had Seattle to win the division and Denver to win the division before the year.

• 52:27Speaker 01

  Looking good.

• 52:27Bill Simmons?

  And the Pats to be a playoff team. Those are my three best ones. And Miami to stink. I guess those are my four best ones.

• 52:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:35Bill Simmons?

  I've had some bad ones, though. I had Vegas to make the playoffs. Not feeling great about that because they're really, really awful. We were both under on Washington and, uh, yeah.

• 52:47Speaker 01

  I had Arizona to win the division. That was my worst thing. But there's more to come. Don't worry, people.

• 52:52Bill Simmons?

  We'll take a break and then you want to apologize to. This episode is brought to you by Expedia. You know how at the end of the season, your team goes to Cancun? Sometimes earlier than expected, sometimes after blowing a 3-1 series lead, but what if you went to Cancun? With Expedia, save up to 30% when you bundle and save. You can book the flight or the hotel now, then book the rest later. In all fairness, though, hopefully your team doesn't go to Cancun. 1-2-3 Cancun. Or if they do, you go with them. Expedia, the one place you go to go places. Sign in to save. Savings vary. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything. And whether it's a flea flicker or a tush push, you need a plan that fits your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you.

• 53:36Bill Simmons?

  So they can help personalize coverage for your life and for your budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. This episode is brought to you by NBA 2K27. We just had one of the craziest off seasons we've had in the NBA, which is perfect for 2K because every 2K season can be one of the craziest off seasons. The whole league shifted in real life. They could shift to an NBA 2K27. The best place to compete with these new look rosters and also try to figure out who's on what roster. You can see how, uh, new teams and new dynamic duos match up. You can play Philly, feel what it's like to have all of their new guys with the old guys.

• 54:18Bill Simmons?

  And you can also take a struggling franchise to the NBA finals if you want. Because it'll never happen in real life for a couple of the struggling franchises. You know who I'm talking about. Anyway, NBA 2K lets you experience every transaction and storyline right from your home.

• 54:34Bill Simmons?

  Pick up your copy of NBA 2K27 right now. Listen, people.

• 54:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:42Bill Simmons?

  All right, staying here on YouTube. All right, you wanted to apologize. We had, we wished some luck from Baby Doll Dixon a couple of weeks ago. Today, you just, you just have some apologies to hand out.

• 54:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, I just feel like a lot of people said, F you. You guys, you're talking too much shit for a week, a month, two months, whatever. I mean, I think J.J. McCarthy is at the top of that list. We're talking about, is he even injured? Well, is he coming back? You know what? Doesn't matter.

• 55:05Bill Simmons?

  Are they hiding an ankle sprain?

• 55:06Speaker 01

  Yeah. Wentz with a broken torso is better. And I'm gonna, I think these are temporary apologies, right? I feel like we could take them back, right? Like, you gotta, you still have to pass the road test. But pretty damn good. Like, if Caleb Williams had blown that game, I was gonna say, you know what? J.J. McCarthy is the best quarterback in the NFC North. I take it all back. So I apologize, J.J. McCarthy.

• 55:29Bill Simmons?

  I was, I thought he was all over the place in that game. He was streaky in this, like, basically streaky the way some guys are in a season.

• 55:38Speaker 01

  Right.

• 55:39Bill Simmons?

  Over the course of four quarters. There was a couple of stretches where he looked awesome. And there were a couple of other stretches where he looked like a rookie QB playing his third start, basically, like some ran out of bounds stupidly in one play. But for the most part, I thought he was, he was really solid. Like, that was a great win, combined with the fact that Flores and his defense finally figured out Goff.

• 56:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:02Bill Simmons?

  How to, like, bug him. And Goff's one of those where you know, 40 minutes in, if you have him in a teaser parlay, if the defense is hitting him a certain way, and he starts fucking bounce passing those passes over the middle, you're like, oh, my God, here we go.

• 56:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, Flores dialed up a nice plan for Goff. I think both teams had five sacks, but the Vikings' five sacks were definitely more effective. Like, the Lions couldn't muster more than 65 yards rushing, I don't think. And that just, that just screwed Goff up. I know it ended up being a close game, but probably wasn't even that close.

• 56:33Bill Simmons?

  Well, it's weird, because they, they came out. Good drive, Laporta, Laporta, Laporta touchdown. It was like, oh, here we go.

• 56:41Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 56:41Bill Simmons?

  Lions, don't, I can't wait to cross this one off. They only ran for 65 yards. They were five for 17 on third down and yet again had another game where multiple guys, you know, either limped off the field or were helped off the field. And they're five and three. It was a team I really battled on whether I wanted to put them in the playoffs or not. And I finally kind of begrudgingly got there. I had them at like 10 and seven as a wild card. But this has been kind of the uneven Lions season. I think all of us were worried about, right?

• 57:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I wouldn't.

• 57:15Bill Simmons?

  A lot of injuries.

• 57:17Speaker 01

  I also don't think I'd be betting against them much. You know, there'll be a couple of spots, I think, that were there on the road and this week's not one of them. But I still think top to bottom, I was surprised Campbell just didn't have them ready. He had like scored 88 points off of buys his last two years. So I thought like, like you said, they did come out scoring, but yeah, Flores was the MVP of that game.

• 57:39Bill Simmons?

  That was a flash sale line. We talked about it last week. It was, the line was, it felt like two and a half, three points higher than it should be.

• 57:46Speaker 01

  Right.

• 57:47Bill Simmons?

  And they were dying for anybody to take the Vikings. And we were all like, no, we're actually going to parlay the Lions and put them in teases. And we got screwed. What's your next apology?

• 57:57Speaker 01

  I'm going to say Colston Loveland, tight end for the Bears. You know, we were all like Tyler Warren, Tyler Warren, Tyler Warren. The Bears are nuts for passing on Tyler Warren. Colston Loveland saves the game, saves a pick. Like that was like one of the, I'm going to quit gambling picks, the Bears.

• 58:15Bill Simmons?

  Can we go over that?

• 58:16Speaker 01

  I just, you know.

• 58:17Bill Simmons?

  I actually took it off the TV because they, they did a pick six and they were up 48 to 27, 48 to 27 with three minutes left, not realizing that they reviewed the pick six.

• 58:32Bill Simmons?

  I still don't understand how it wasn't a pick six.

• 58:34Speaker 01

  It was like the guy who the intended receiver breathed on him or something. I don't know what what touched the the interceptor there. That was ridiculous, but they called him down.

• 58:42Bill Simmons?

  We do this. We do this a lot with football where we're like, we watch football every day and the rules seem to just change depending on the situation. That's one where it's like, I watch football every week. He gathered the ball as when he finally caught it and he got up and ran and they always called that a touchdown and why are they bringing this back? So anyway, they have to punt. All of a sudden Flacco scores. I didn't even know about it till Hench texted us.

• 59:06Speaker 01

  Hench's text like Flacco has 400. I'm like, yeah, who gives a shit? So what?

• 59:09Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, they're down six with the ball driving and it would have been one of the worst losses of all time. Then it seemed like the Bears were going to win by two and not cover and then Loveland saves everybody.

• 59:20Speaker 01

  Amazing. And there's a still of Loveland like twisting in the air with three defenders around him. The caption is he scored on this. Like he just bulldozed it. Probably should have gone down at the two like Gunner Stockton did for Georgia Saturday. Then they just kicked the field goal, right? But thank God he didn't. But by the way, I'm not gonna, you know, Ben Johnson says don't, and you love those, right? The press.

• 59:44Bill Simmons?

  Ben Johnson's my favorite. I seek them out now. I'm like, did he do a post game?

• 59:49Speaker 01

  You're gonna pay him to come to your house.

• 59:51Bill Simmons?

  I love it. He's like, this is what we do. It's like, this is what you do? You blew a 41-27 lead with two minutes left.

• 59:58Speaker 01

  Yeah. No, don't apologize for a win. He tells them like, all right, maybe apologize for allowing 15 points in 49 seconds.

• 1:00:07Bill Simmons?

  Giving up 480 passing yards to a guy whose shoulder was so bad, he threw a 40 yard hail Mary.

• 1:00:13Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:00:13Bill Simmons?

  It's a slight apology. I love his things.

• 1:00:16Speaker 01

  But as a gambler, I don't want to get, I feel like I was taking shit. Everyone's like, oh, you got so lucky with that Bears game. Like, it shouldn't have been close. Like this is.

• 1:00:25Bill Simmons?

  No, that's a win. That was, we should have won that by three touchdowns.

• 1:00:28Speaker 01

  It's like saying a guy born without any limbs, he wins a trip to Puerto Vallarta and the price is right. It's like, oh, you're so lucky. Like, no, there's so much bullshit going on before the kickoff return for a touchdown, the blocked field goal, the onside kick recovery, 15 points in less than a minute, the interception, like you said, for a touchdown was called back. All that wasn't very lucky, so. Eat it. I'm taking that win.

• 1:00:50Bill Simmons?

  Swift's replacement was awesome. I have him in our winner fantasy league.

• 1:00:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:55Bill Simmons?

  That guy, if you didn't watch football a year, or you were in a coma, or you were like in outer space and just landed and watched these games as your first games of the year.

• 1:01:03Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:01:03Bill Simmons?

  You would think that he was like Jonathan Taylor. Like, he was fucking incredible. He was over and over again, just doing shit.

• 1:01:09Speaker 01

  The wrong guy, and that's why I figured, that's why I turned it off. I'm like, he's just gonna, he's running for seven yards a clip, and they just need to kill the clock, and then.

• 1:01:16Bill Simmons?

  Ben Johnson gave him a game ball.

• 1:01:17Speaker 01

  Oh, he did? Okay.

• 1:01:19Bill Simmons?

  The yo, man, I love everybody in this room, man. It's a great win. We gotta keep it going. They all say the same things. It's unbelievable.

• 1:01:27Speaker 01

  It's good.

• 1:01:27Bill Simmons?

  Nobody's ever like, nobody ever gets it's like, I knew I was better than Deandre Swift. I've been telling all you motherfuckers all year. This is my team.

• 1:01:38Speaker 01

  The other locker room that was different, like Jamar Chase and Chase Brown going off on the defense, I kinda, I kinda like it. I kinda like it. I really do.

• 1:01:48Bill Simmons?

  It's in the running for the worst defense I've ever seen.

• 1:01:50Speaker 01

  Yeah. It's now many, many games.

• 1:01:53Bill Simmons?

  Ripping off 10, 10 yard plays over and over again. I had Caleb in fantasy, who had 40.5 points in our league that we care about.

• 1:02:02Speaker 01

  That's nice.

• 1:02:04Bill Simmons?

  Montegale had 198 total yards. The Bears ran for 283. Flacco had 470 for 14. I think that, I think the Bengals are the most entertaining team in the league now. Like, if they can play another shitty team, it's gonna be a 40, 37.

• 1:02:19Speaker 01

  Should they play the Cowboys leading up to the Super Bowl, like the morning of the Super Bowl?

• 1:02:24Bill Simmons?

  Saturday game?

• 1:02:25Speaker 01

  Or even the morning of, yeah, yeah.

• 1:02:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, make it like a 100 million dollar game. Get Netflix to do it.

• 1:02:32Bill Simmons?

  Oh, more apologies. Who do you have next?

• 1:02:35Speaker 01

  Let's see, who else do I have? Oh, Diddy. I mean, he's gonna be out of jail soon. That's great. How did he do it? We'll never doubt him again. What a, what a legend. Oh, you know what? This is dumb of me. I'm gonna apologize to YouTube TV. I, I don't know why. I didn't know you could customize the four box. Why didn't I, I'm sitting there like a forensic scientist in a lab trying to match up screens.

• 1:02:58Bill Simmons?

  You didn't know you could just do the press the thing?

• 1:03:00Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:03:00Bill Simmons?

  Oh, my God. That's all I do.

• 1:03:01Speaker 01

  This is great. This is unbelievable. This is a game changer, and I apologize for anything I've said to YouTube TV.

• 1:03:07Bill Simmons?

  I've gotten to the point where I like for good luck, putting the Pats in the bottom left.

• 1:03:11Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 1:03:11Bill Simmons?

  So I'll just, I'll keep moving the multi views, like trying to do it until I finally get the Pats in the bottom left, and then.

• 1:03:18Speaker 01

  That's I'm an idiot. Bad job by me. I don't know why I did that. And I'll apologize.

• 1:03:23Bill Simmons?

  An apology. Can I do an apology?

• 1:03:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, go ahead. Yeah.

• 1:03:26Bill Simmons?

  I'd like to apologize to Mike Tomlin.

• 1:03:28Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:03:29Bill Simmons?

  Two weeks in a row betting against him at home in Pittsburgh as an underdog.

• 1:03:38Bill Simmons?

  I should have known. I should have known he was gonna do all the dumb, dumb Steelers shit that they do all the time. Like, I just, I should have known it was, it looked too easy. Daniel Jones on grass. This was like the exact type of situation Tomlin loves. They were just gonna get six turnovers out of nowhere. I just should have known. He's, he's just, this is who he is. He's gonna be this guy until he's like 70. Just winning game. They're always gonna go nine and eight or 10 and seven. I don't know why I went under with them. It doesn't matter who's on the team. They could have a 42-year-old QB. They could have a defense that gives up 20 straight passes the week before. They're always gonna be fine. They're always gonna go nine and eight or 10 and seven.

• 1:04:15Speaker 01

  Well, nine and eight was still under, wasn't it? Wasn't it nine and a half?

• 1:04:18Bill Simmons?

  Now, they're, they were eight and a half this year.

• 1:04:20Speaker 01

  Oh, right. That's right. If you wanted to go all the way.

• 1:04:22Bill Simmons?

  All right. What's your last apology?

• 1:04:23Speaker 01

  One more. I just have nerd clusters. They're fantastic. I laughed at them. I'm like, you kids are wasting your time with these nerd clusters. They're all of a sudden, have you had them? They're my favorite non-chocolate candy now. They've grown on me. They're literally growing.

• 1:04:38Bill Simmons?

  Is that what Brad threw on our, on our ribs?

• 1:04:40Speaker 01

  He just did regular nerds, but they have these clusters now. It's like in a gummy. You haven't had this? You're not living right. You're just, you're just.

• 1:04:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, of course it's unhealthy. Look at me. Yeah.

• 1:04:51Bill Simmons?

  We give you a health advice here. Kit Kats lately. Been on a Kit Kat run.

• 1:04:54Speaker 01

  Oh, that's your thing?

• 1:04:55Bill Simmons?

  Kit Kats are really good. Well, my wife bought Halloween candy and bought the bigger Kit Kats.

• 1:05:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:03Speaker 01

  Can I tell you something? I think bigger Kit Kats are so much better than the smaller ones. And I think it has to do with the ratio. They must. I think the ratio of whatever is, is perfect.

• 1:05:14Bill Simmons?

  In the bigger ones.

• 1:05:14Speaker 01

  On the big ones. Yeah.

• 1:05:15Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. I'm with you.

• 1:05:17Speaker 01

  Okay, good.

• 1:05:18Bill Simmons?

  Pat's Falcons. Pat's win. Don't cover. All the Pats fans were worried about this game. And yet the Pats were up 21-7 driving before halftime.

• 1:05:29Bill Simmons?

  At midfield, it was like 25 seconds left. It felt like 24 to 7 minimum. And then May gets sacked, fumbled. Falcons come back down.

• 1:05:41Speaker 01

  Didn't even get sacked. It was such a wuss play. Just gave the ball up.

• 1:05:44Bill Simmons?

  It was like a, almost like a tap.

• 1:05:46Speaker 01

  What's wrong with that guy? He's not that good, but go ahead.

• 1:05:48Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. He's on pace for 4,400 yards and 34 TDs and 8 picks and breaking the completion record. Completion percentage record. He actually would have the record all time in the history of the NFL right now.

• 1:06:02Speaker 01

  I just can't believe this. I can't, I really can't believe we're doing this like years later. Like you, you should have had to suffer like a Cleveland Browns.

• 1:06:10Bill Simmons?

  I did suffer. We suffered for half a decade.

• 1:06:11Speaker 01

  What do you want from us? Please, please. Half a decade and then you should have been able, you should have stayed with Mac Jones. Like you shouldn't go half a decade and now have, you know, junior goat here. It's just so stupid.

• 1:06:23Bill Simmons?

  Well, he got sacked 12 times in two weeks.

• 1:06:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:06:27Bill Simmons?

  And was under a real duress and there's some issues with this Pats team, which we've known. But they are 7-2. They are gonna, I think, be a playoff team just because of their scheduling. They do have their trade deadline coming up with like $48 million under the cap. They need a pass rusher. They need another receiver. The game flipped today, not because of that fumble, but because Booty got hurt. And all of a sudden the Pats had nobody getting open. Diggs is still like on a snap count. So it's like Pop Douglas, it's Kyle Williams, the rookie receiver who every time May throws to him, either Williams gets crossed up with May or vice versa. He's never in the right spot. And basically they're just throwing the tight ends and throwing swing passes. I thought they were really lucky to win the game. Drake London was killing them.

• 1:07:11Bill Simmons?

  It was the worst Gonzalez has looked all season. Drake London was dominant.

• 1:07:16Speaker 01

  Very tough to cover that guy. Yeah.

• 1:07:18Bill Simmons?

  They shut down Bijon. I, Penix was really up and down, but it came down and they missed an extra point.

• 1:07:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's, you get to play all the bad teams with all the bad coaches, all the bad quarterbacks and all the bad kickers. So it's, it's hard to lose. And you're gonna have A.J. Brown against Tampa next week.

• 1:07:36Bill Simmons?

  I don't think it'll be A.J. Brown, but I am looking at those Dolphins guys. That Jalen Phillips, Hendrickson would be great. The Bengals lost again. I don't think the Raiders will trade Max Crosby.

• 1:07:47Speaker 01

  Nah.

• 1:07:49Bill Simmons?

  But.

• 1:07:49Speaker 01

  Look at you, the rich get richer here with this team. Do you think Vrabel two to one for coach of the year is a better bet than? Maybe for MVP? Cause he's sneaking up there, Vrabel.

• 1:08:01Bill Simmons?

  It's it's either Vrabel or Steichen, right?

• 1:08:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, so that's that's who you'd have to be.

• 1:08:05Bill Simmons?

  Come down to who has a better record? That's who wins coach of the year?

• 1:08:09Speaker 01

  I think if you win the division. And, you know, our, well. I don't know. This is some schedule.

• 1:08:16Bill Simmons?

  I had Vrabel at plus 750.

• 1:08:19Speaker 01

  You do? That's good.

• 1:08:20Bill Simmons?

  From before the year. I picked that in our futures draft, too.

• 1:08:24Speaker 01

  Oh, no. It's one more thing I'm gonna lose. Terrific.

• 1:08:28Bill Simmons?

  You had some good ones in the future.

• 1:08:30Speaker 01

  Forgot who I had. Yeah, I had one stupid thing going.

• 1:08:33Bill Simmons?

  You know, I think the Pats are missing a couple. I think they have a real chance to do something in January and maybe win a playoff game or two, but they're. The the offensive line is becoming real concerning. Like Will Campbell got worked a couple of times. Like he got like just shoved backwards into May a couple of times, which I have not. I don't remember seeing that before. They never reminded it either. Quickly, do we care about 49ers Giants, Dayball being first coach fired? Probably not.

• 1:09:02Speaker 01

  No, I'll say is we just need to be smarter about some stuff like we we need to start respecting our cross off teams. And treating them as cross off teams. And when you could bet against them getting two and a half points, just go for it. Especially since San Francisco was one of our playoff teams. Like, how do we think this is all gonna work out if we're not?

• 1:09:21Bill Simmons?

  How do you bet the Niners when you don't even know who's playing for them?

• 1:09:24Speaker 01

  I know. I know. But the Giants had worse injuries, it turns out. Although now San Francisco lost someone else too. So, but yeah, they heard us loud and clear about being the seventh seed and they just demolished that team.

• 1:09:37Bill Simmons?

  Jags Raiders, Jags win, don't cover. They win in OT. They win because they score in overtime. Another weird overtime thing. They take like seven minutes.

• 1:09:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:49Bill Simmons?

  Even though they basically took the kickoff almost to midfield. Then they were just doing 40 seconds of play. They go down in the red zone. Nothing has been more exciting this year than watching the Jaguars execute plays inside the 10 yard line. They had a pick in the end zone in the first half. They actually scored. Raiders come back down, they score, but they don't get the two point because instead of throwing to Brock Bowers, who had 12 catches, 127 yards and three TDs and was running amok. They're like, no, no, no, we're gonna have Gino try to hit Tyler Lockett over the defensive line. There's no way this will get tipped.

• 1:10:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:10:22Bill Simmons?

  And they lose.

• 1:10:23Speaker 01

  We knew, we were on a text chain, like this is 3029. As the Raiders got the ball.

• 1:10:28Bill Simmons?

  No question, they're gonna overthink it.

• 1:10:30Speaker 01

  You said it was weird overtime. I thought that was the perfect, that, that is exactly how it should be. One team gets it, goes six or seven minutes, scores. The other team has a shot, has three or four minutes, scores and goes for two.

• 1:10:42Bill Simmons?

  12 minutes.

• 1:10:43Speaker 01

  I love that. I, I know, I just think that worked out one possession each. That said, I thought this game should not have been in the late window. It should have been in a, a cricket stadium in, in Prague at 3 a.m. Pacific time.

• 1:10:58Bill Simmons?

  I have three questions coming in this game.

• 1:11:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:01Bill Simmons?

  Would you like a rule addendum? That if you score the first TD in overtime, the first team to have the ball, they score a touchdown. If they go for two and get it, the game's over.

• 1:11:11Speaker 01

  Oh, no, I still want both teams touching the ball. It's not fair. The defenses are exhausted. It's not fair. One team wins a coin toss and, and the, the other team doesn't get it. But I, I get what you're saying. Yeah. The, whatever avoids a tie is best.

• 1:11:27Bill Simmons?

  Here's my next question. Is Pete Carroll the new clapper? Or is he the new Joe Biden? Cause it's one or the other. Cause he's, he's on the sideline. He's not really, doesn't seem like he's doing that much coaching. His mouth's kinda open. And he's just doing this like he's chewing gum or he's just kinda has that vacant look.

• 1:11:48Speaker 01

  Shoes come hard.

• 1:11:48Bill Simmons?

  It's a lot of clapping, lot of clapping.

• 1:11:50Speaker 01

  I know, I feel bad for him. I mean, he's sitting there watching 68 yard field goals and he must be like, what the fuck? But this is not, this is not my day and age, my, my game here. I mean, you form.

• 1:12:01Bill Simmons?

  It does speak to how, how well like Pete Carroll was and how disliked Bill Belichick is that they're basically in the same situation in college and pros.

• 1:12:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, if he had a 24 year old girlfriend, I think it might be a little different story, but they covered. I'm proud of them. Did you, um, and I'll say this, Bowers makes them watchable. Like has a tight end ever?

• 1:12:20Bill Simmons?

  He was awesome.

• 1:12:21Speaker 01

  But has a tight end ever made a, an unwatchable team watchable? Just a tight end? I don't remember.

• 1:12:26Bill Simmons?

  I have him in all my fantasy leagues. He was awesome against the Pats. He got hurt. They played him hurt for like three weeks, then stopped playing him.

• 1:12:33Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:12:33Bill Simmons?

  And now he's like great again. Like it was like.

• 1:12:36Speaker 01

  That touchdown pass was phenomenal.

• 1:12:38Bill Simmons?

  He's fine. He was like an absolute beast.

• 1:12:41Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:12:41Bill Simmons?

  And they were throwing it to him, throwing it to him, throwing it to him to the point where it was like, hey, man. Don't get this guy hurt again. Like 12 catches is enough. Like how many, what is he gonna have? 17?

• 1:12:51Speaker 01

  Was Russ Francis your guy? Like with the Patriots?

• 1:12:55Bill Simmons?

  Francis.

• 1:12:55Speaker 01

  But, but the Patriots, but the Patriots were bad, but you watched because of Russ Francis? Like I'm trying to figure out another.

• 1:13:00Bill Simmons?

  We were good. We, we were good in 76 all the way through. We were favored to win the AFC every year, basically.

• 1:13:06Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:13:07Bill Simmons?

  We had Russ Francis, we had, uh, we had Stanley Morgan and Daryl Stingley and Harold Jackson.

• 1:13:14Speaker 01

  Raiders and the Steelers? What are you talking about?

• 1:13:16Bill Simmons?

  There was a year where we were favored to win the AFC.

• 1:13:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, 2009.

• 1:13:19Bill Simmons?

  No, 1978, maybe?

• 1:13:21Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:13:22Bill Simmons?

  One of those years. Yeah, we were like.

• 1:13:23Speaker 01

  Like when Denver won?

• 1:13:25Bill Simmons?

  We almost made the Super Bowl in 76. We got robbed by the, in the Raiders game. We were good.

• 1:13:30Speaker 01

  All right. I'm just, I'm trying to think of another tight end that made a team great. That wasn't, not great, but watchable.

• 1:13:37Bill Simmons?

  Hmm.

• 1:13:39Speaker 01

  Um, I'll come up with it.

• 1:13:40Bill Simmons?

  Kellen Winslow.

• 1:13:41Speaker 01

  That team was good though.

• 1:13:42Bill Simmons?

  Gonzalez.

• 1:13:44Speaker 01

  Good team.

• 1:13:45Bill Simmons?

  Ben Coats?

• 1:13:47Speaker 01

  Maybe.

• 1:13:48Bill Simmons?

  One more thing from that game. 68 yard field goal. We've talked about this before. Not even a blip. I don't even think we made SportsCenter that somebody broke the record by two yards. So I think 75 yards has to be the number that people would actually be impressed by at this point.

• 1:14:06Speaker 01

  Interesting.

• 1:14:07Bill Simmons?

  68, it's bouncing off people. 70, I don't even think people would care. 75, we're like, oh, wow, that's long.

• 1:14:14Speaker 01

  75. Yeah, I want this to go up the record one per year for the rest of my life. And I want to.

• 1:14:20Bill Simmons?

  101 yards would be.

• 1:14:22Speaker 01

  101, I'm not going another 33 years. No. But if it got, if I got another 15, 16 years.

• 1:14:26Bill Simmons?

  Matter of fact, nerd clusters.

• 1:14:28Speaker 01

  84 yard field goal is what I want to see. Yeah, but you're right. Like there were only three games played in that late window. The guy kicked the 68 yard field goal and it was like, all right, well, if we get to it, we get to it.

• 1:14:40Bill Simmons?

  There should never be less than four games in the late window.

• 1:14:43Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:14:44Bill Simmons?

  They should have moved the Houston game.

• 1:14:47Speaker 01

  I thought the Colts Steelers would move.

• 1:14:48Bill Simmons?

  Or Colts Steelers.

• 1:14:49Speaker 01

  But they wanted so many, too many, they wanted all the eyes, the CBS eyes on Buffalo, uh, Casey.

• 1:14:56Bill Simmons?

  Rams Saints, nothing to report here, except Stafford is the MVP candidate of the week. That'll be a story tomorrow. Stafford, why isn't he the MVP? Last year is Jonathan Taylor, this week will be Stafford.

• 1:15:06Speaker 01

  Plus 500, he's moving up.

• 1:15:09Bill Simmons?

  Chargers Titans, Herbert, eight picks this year and a couple of really bad ones.

• 1:15:15Bill Simmons?

  It's like year five for him.

• 1:15:18Speaker 01

  He just doesn't care. I don't think, he is just slinging it. It's Brett Favreish, I think. I gotta be honest, I didn't have this on, uh, this is the one that kicked in until, until it got close to the, to the spread at the end.

• 1:15:29Bill Simmons?

  I had this on instead of the packer again.

• 1:15:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:15:32Bill Simmons?

  Chargers, to be a sneaky fallout of the playoffs team, right now they're six and three. There's three, seven and two teams. Chargers are six and three, Buffalo is six and two. Chargers rest of the way, Pittsburgh at home.

• 1:15:47Bill Simmons?

  Their road games at Jacksonville, at KC, at Dallas, at Denver, and they also have Philly and Houston in LA. And if their offensive line is going to look like it did in the second half of the game and how it's looked without Joe Walt, I think this is a team that could drop out.

• 1:16:05Speaker 01

  You don't think they get four?

• 1:16:06Bill Simmons?

  I think they go from six and three to nine and eight seems conceivable.

• 1:16:09Speaker 01

  Really? All right. So let's see. Oh, wow.

• 1:16:11Bill Simmons?

  Three more wins here.

• 1:16:12Speaker 01

  Fandel agrees with you. Minus 225. So they're right. They're right there.

• 1:16:18Bill Simmons?

  They 10 wins, we think?

• 1:16:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:16:21Bill Simmons?

  That has to be AFC. You can't get in with nine, I don't think. I think it has to be 10.

• 1:16:26Speaker 01

  No, I don't think nine.

• 1:16:28Bill Simmons?

  So I think, I think four wins is going to be hard for them.

• 1:16:35Speaker 01

  They're done with the Raiders?

• 1:16:36Bill Simmons?

  When they play KC, KC's going to need the game.

• 1:16:38Speaker 01

  Definitely.

• 1:16:39Bill Simmons?

  When they play Denver in week, week 18, that might be Denver playing for like the one seed. Like they're going to give a shit about that.

• 1:16:48Bill Simmons?

  Philly, so it'll come down to Pittsburgh. If they lose to Pittsburgh next week, I think they, I think that, I don't think they're going to make the playoffs.

• 1:16:54Speaker 01

  We're going to go over this in a second, but it's Sunday night and it's going to be 80% Steelers fans.

• 1:16:58Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. All right. One more break for the pod. We'll keep. This episode is brought to you by Searchlight Pictures, Wild Horse 9. John Malkovich and Sam Rockwell, I like those guys, starring the sharp-witted comedy thriller from Academy Award winner Martin McDonagh, writer-director of The Banshees of Minnehoshan and Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri, set in the 1970s, filmed on location on Easter Island. Malkovich and Rockwell play CIA agents Chris and Lee, who are caught in a dangerous game of secrets and survival. Also starring Steve Buscemi, another one of my guys, Parker Posey and Tom Waits. Wild Horse 9 is being hailed by critics as a revitalizing shot of pure entertainment.

• 1:17:40Speaker 01

  And easily one of the best films of the year. Don't miss Wild Horse 9, only in theaters November 6th. Get tickets now.

• 1:17:47Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to you by ServiceNow. Look, I already have my dream job. I run the ringer, argue with Chris Ryan, AKA CR. But even dream jobs have not so dreamy parts. You know, the work that slows you down never seems to go away. That's where ServiceNow's AI specialists come in. They're like digital teammates who actually do the job, start to finish. No handoffs, no homework. That means more time for the work that actually matters, which for me is talking about whether the 86 Celtics can beat the 96 Bulls, which they could. To learn how to put AI to work for people, visit servicenow.com. Going on YouTube, guest alliance, week 10. I'm up 6-3.

• 1:18:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, you're up 6-3.

• 1:18:27Bill Simmons?

  Bi weeks, Cincinnati, they need time to figure out a defensive plan. If they're ever going to trade Trey Hendrickson, this is the week, right? He doesn't have a long-term contract. Team's going nowhere. How are you going to pay him when you already paid your receivers in Burrow? Why not try to get like a second or a third for him?

• 1:18:48Speaker 01

  No doubt, or maybe he'll just drive off a cliff, take the easy way out. Poor guy.

• 1:18:54Bill Simmons?

  Cincy, Tennessee, KC and your team Dallas. You get a week off of not watching them.

• 1:18:59Speaker 01

  So excited.

• 1:19:00Bill Simmons?

  Thursday night. Broncos home for the Las Vegas Raiders. The Broncos are almost definitely going to be 8-2 on Thursday night. I Broncos by 9.

• 1:19:15Speaker 01

  Uh, I had 10 and a half and it's 9 and a half. Oh, you get that shit. I got excited for a second because I can't do math.

• 1:19:23Bill Simmons?

  9 and 1/2.

• 1:19:26Speaker 01

  I know what you're thinking.

• 1:19:30Bill Simmons?

  Can they just rest Brock Bowers for that game for fantasy reasons? Or if they they're down 10, just not play him anymore? I need Brock Bowers in week 15 and 16. Don't get hurt in this game, Brock Bowers. Take it easy.

• 1:19:42Speaker 01

  Geno's going to take it easy. We know that.

• 1:19:45Bill Simmons?

  Geno's just doesn't have it anymore.

• 1:19:48Speaker 01

  This is.

• 1:19:48Bill Simmons?

  There's just basic passes like over the middle where he had one pass in the second half. The guy's cutting across the middle. And if he leads him a little, I think it would have been a touchdown, but he throws it behind. The guy has to fall down to catch it. And it's just a lot of those. He just doesn't have it anymore. It's too bad. Germany game.

• 1:20:08Bill Simmons?

  Colts Falcons, pretty good game.

• 1:20:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know, I feel like they're gonna be like-

• 1:20:15Bill Simmons?

  Germany more than England? That's my takeaway from this year.

• 1:20:17Speaker 01

  I think Goodell's gonna be like, hey, we didn't realize these teams were gonna be decent at this point. We'd like to, um, take a rain check. We'll send you something else. Hey, the Jets are playing the Browns. We'll, we'll send you that instead.

• 1:20:29Bill Simmons?

  This could start another world war. England's like, what the hell?

• 1:20:32Speaker 01

  Germany, yeah.

• 1:20:36Bill Simmons?

  Colts, neutral field. I have in Vegas, I'm five and a half over the Falcons.

• 1:20:41Speaker 01

  Is this gonna be one of these days? I had five, it's six and a half.

• 1:20:45Bill Simmons?

  Oh.

• 1:20:48Bill Simmons?

  So what does that mean if it was Indianapolis? It would be Colts by eight?

• 1:20:52Speaker 01

  Well, what was your team? Your team opened at five and a half at home, right? The Colts are, Colts are, right, it went down to four and a half, but the Colts are power ranked. Couple points better than Patriots? I guess that makes sense, yeah.

• 1:21:06Bill Simmons?

  If we were playing the Falcons on a neutral field, that would have been like three or three and a half.

• 1:21:10Speaker 01

  Right, right.

• 1:21:11Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:11Speaker 01

  I think that's fair. You just don't know what Atlanta team's ever gonna show up here.

• 1:21:17Bill Simmons?

  Sunday's marquee game.

• 1:21:21Bill Simmons?

  We did it, Sal. We're back.

• 1:21:23Speaker 01

  You made it.

• 1:21:24Bill Simmons?

  Patriots are in the Sunday marquee game.

• 1:21:26Speaker 01

  No argument.

• 1:21:27Bill Simmons?

  They're sending Nance and Romo and Tracy Woodson.

• 1:21:33Bill Simmons?

  Romo's gonna do the, okay Jim, here we go. Here we go, Jim. Drink me.

• 1:21:41Speaker 01

  How did he do that? Do you think he had to pay the Howard Letterman's estate? Is Howard Letterman still alive for that?

• 1:21:47Bill Simmons?

  Okay Jim, I have Larry Holmes, four rows to two.

• 1:21:53Bill Simmons?

  I loved Harold Letterman.

• 1:21:54Speaker 01

  Oh, he was great.

• 1:21:56Bill Simmons?

  Uh, I have this as a hardcore tic tac game. Bucks minus one and a half at home against the New England Patriots.

• 1:22:03Speaker 01

  Good, I get this one from you. I said three, it is two and a half.

• 1:22:08Speaker 01

  Oh, look how insulted you are.

• 1:22:10Bill Simmons?

  Well, so how healthy are the Bucks gonna be?

• 1:22:14Speaker 01

  Well, I mean, you're, you're playing them at their best spot, right? It's off a bye, right? Yeah, they were off this week. I don't know how healthy.

• 1:22:24Bill Simmons?

  This Guillotine League that we're in, which I've really enjoyed.

• 1:22:27Speaker 01

  It's the best.

• 1:22:30Speaker 01

  Everyone do a guillotine league. It's so much better. I just want to say it's like the scramble you have to make to add drop players every week, whereas in your other leagues, there's no players on the waiver wire.

• 1:22:40Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, because every time somebody gets voted out, yeah, you get you get their players or you get to bid on them.

• 1:22:46Speaker 01

  Frenzy, right?

• 1:22:47Bill Simmons?

  So I I tried to gamble this year and tried to not spend a lot of our $1,000 budget on free agents and just tried to patch it together week after week, hoping if we could get to like week 10, I'd have more money than everybody else.

• 1:23:00Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:23:01Bill Simmons?

  And today I had Caleb Williams, who had 38.7 points and single-handedly carried me. I have Bucky Irving, Mayfield and Anikbuka on the bench and I have more money than everyone else. I'm starting to get ideas.

• 1:23:14Speaker 01

  And there's only four bench players, right?

• 1:23:16Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:23:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's pretty good.

• 1:23:18Bill Simmons?

  Starting to get ideas.

• 1:23:19Speaker 01

  Good. I hope they light up your Patriots next week. You'll be happy.

• 1:23:23Bill Simmons?

  Well, Bucky Irving, I think will be back, right?

• 1:23:25Speaker 01

  They were saying it looks decent that he's back. Yeah. Yeah, I have a bunch of leaks too.

• 1:23:30Bill Simmons?

  This is a tough, I, you know, obviously the Pats have won a few in a row here.

• 1:23:34Speaker 01

  You could lose one here. What is it? Six in a row and six in a row against the spread? Just enough. It's enough. Let the other kids have a shot.

• 1:23:43Bill Simmons?

  They're gonna make a trade. I really do. I think they're gonna add somebody important. I think they're gonna add an impact guy. I think the AFC is wide open. And they know what they need. They need a pass rusher. If they got an awesome linebacker, probably not conceivable, but yeah. Offensive line, everybody's looking for that, whatever. Pass rusher and extra receiver they need.

• 1:24:02Speaker 01

  It's gonna be Vita Vea, taken right off the Tampa roster, thrown right in there, head to head Sunday.

• 1:24:09Bill Simmons?

  Watchables, I only got one. Rams at San Francisco.

• 1:24:16Bill Simmons?

  I have the Rams favored by three points.

• 1:24:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, I said one and a half. It is, it's three exactly. No, it's three and a half, but you got it. Three and a half it went to.

• 1:24:26Bill Simmons?

  Probably Purdy for this?

• 1:24:29Speaker 01

  I mean, you keep saying that probably every Sunday night, we've said probably Purdy, but Mac Jones looked good today.

• 1:24:35Bill Simmons?

  They don't want him to come back.

• 1:24:36Speaker 01

  No, I know. He looked okay.

• 1:24:38Bill Simmons?

  Did these teams play already?

• 1:24:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, they played that Thursday night game, right?

• 1:24:41Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah, they beat them.

• 1:24:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:24:45Bill Simmons?

  So bigger game for the Rams because they need to split this with the Niners or else. Yeah.

• 1:24:54Bill Simmons?

  Okay, that's our last watchable. Sorry, Sal.

• 1:24:57Speaker 01

  Is that really it?

• 1:24:58Bill Simmons?

  We have four fairly watchables. Ravens at Minnesota?

• 1:25:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, that was, that was the close. That's the only one I would put.

• 1:25:04Bill Simmons?

  Would you put that in a watchable? I guess that should be in a watchable. Alright, that's fair.

• 1:25:06Speaker 01

  At this point it is. Vikings play good enough.

• 1:25:09Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I think that's fair. Alright, I'll put that in there. I have the Ravens favored in that game by one and a half.

• 1:25:21Speaker 01

  Oh, I said four and a half. It is three and a half.

• 1:25:26Bill Simmons?

  Really?

• 1:25:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, really.

• 1:25:28Bill Simmons?

  So we're just all in on the Ravens as a contender again, even though they're

• 1:25:31Speaker 01

  You have to be.

• 1:25:32Bill Simmons?

  Three and five, really? Cause they, they look good against Miami Dolphins who fired their GM the next day and should have already fired their coach and benched their quarterback? We're just back?

• 1:25:41Speaker 01

  I think it's two. God, it wasn't against good teams, but they're, it was all about the defense, right? Is this team gonna allow 40 a game?

• 1:25:50Bill Simmons?

  Did you see the montage of all the terrible Tua passes? I actually watched that on ESPN the next day. I was having coffee. They showed a montage of the all 22 of Tua just missing guys. It was like, it was like six passes.

• 1:26:03Speaker 01

  He's great. He's really good. No, we might be over Sal.

• 1:26:05Bill Simmons?

  He'll be on, he'll be on Good Morning Football in two years?

• 1:26:10Speaker 01

  Maybe that's one of the guys you trade for. You got a lot of money.

• 1:26:15Speaker 01

  Good backup.

• 1:26:18Bill Simmons?

  Uh, fairly watchables. Three then. Texans home for the Jaguars. I would have had this a watchable, but I'm, I'm gonna guess CJ Stroud doesn't play in this game. Right?

• 1:26:29Speaker 01

  I, I can't say anything.

• 1:26:30Bill Simmons?

  The concussion is usually you get scratched for a week.

• 1:26:32Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:26:33Bill Simmons?

  So knowing that, I'm gonna say Texans by two and a half at home against the Jaguars.

• 1:26:37Speaker 01

  Alright, I eased this one. I get, I said one, it's one and a half.

• 1:26:41Bill Simmons?

  Okay.

• 1:26:42Speaker 01

  That'll move around a bunch though, right?

• 1:26:46Bill Simmons?

  I thought ETN was really good today.

• 1:26:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, he did everything but score. I haven't been fantasy.

• 1:26:50Bill Simmons?

  He really had, he had a huge impact on that game. Michael, uh, Brian Thomas got hurt. Brian Thomas had an awesome play over the middle, ran for 40 yards and got hurt. It was just when it was like, here he comes, he's back. Seahawks home for the Cardinals.

• 1:27:07Bill Simmons?

  Wow. I, I, I did these guesses in the afternoon and I guess Seahawks by six and a half. I'm bumping that to seven. Seahawks by seven.

• 1:27:18Speaker 01

  It's six and a half.

• 1:27:19Bill Simmons?

  All right.

• 1:27:20Speaker 01

  I had, I had eight. No, you won it.

• 1:27:22Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I had it.

• 1:27:22Speaker 01

  I had it. I, I thought that should be higher. I don't know. Arizona, short week, going to Seattle.

• 1:27:30Bill Simmons?

  So you're playing them tomorrow and there's a weird Brissette Kyler Murray thing happening.

• 1:27:36Speaker 01

  Where Kyler Murray is available, but not starting. Yeah.

• 1:27:39Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. I think their season's on the line.

• 1:27:43Speaker 01

  You know, Kyler Murray is nine and O at AT&T Stadium. He won like the schoolboy tournament there and he won his high school thing.

• 1:27:51Bill Simmons?

  I'm aware.

• 1:27:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:52Bill Simmons?

  It seems like they don't want him to play because if he does well, then they're kind of stuck with him for the rest of the year. Cause he played well in this Monday night football game in Dallas.

• 1:28:00Speaker 01

  Interesting.

• 1:28:01Bill Simmons?

  So they'd rather play Brissette, maybe try to win anyway, but then they don't have this Kyler thing. I, I just think it's weird if he, if he's available to play and you're not playing him like, if Drake May was available to play, we would play Drake May.

• 1:28:15Speaker 01

  Right. I, I think it's exactly that. Like Brissette, anyone should look good, right?

• 1:28:21Bill Simmons?

  They don't want Kyler Murray anymore.

• 1:28:22Speaker 01

  Going against this Cowboys defense. Yeah.

• 1:28:25Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:25Speaker 01

  Brissette almost beat the Colts in Indy. So might not be that bad.

• 1:28:31Bill Simmons?

  Third watch, fairly watchable. This might be a poop factor if Daniels is out.

• 1:28:36Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:28:37Bill Simmons?

  Lions, Washington. I gotta change my pick on this.

• 1:28:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm gonna change it too.

• 1:28:40Bill Simmons?

  It's in Washington. How many points am I allowed to bump it up? Three?

• 1:28:45Speaker 01

  I'll bump mine three. You bump yours three.

• 1:28:47Bill Simmons?

  All right. I had minus six for the Lions, so I'll bump it to minus nine.

• 1:28:52Speaker 01

  Uh, plus nine. Yeah. It's, uh, you get it. Shit, it's eight and a half. I said six and a half. That was dumb. Dumb.

• 1:29:01Speaker 01

  Five to three, you're up.

• 1:29:02Bill Simmons?

  Teaser?

• 1:29:03Speaker 01

  Oh, you love Detroit.

• 1:29:04Bill Simmons?

  Parlay?

• 1:29:05Speaker 01

  Detroit and Denver so far. Let's keep going. You'll find another.

• 1:29:11Bill Simmons?

  Denver. Oh, I do like those two.

• 1:29:17Speaker 01

  They're not gonna screw us two weeks in a row. Come on.

• 1:29:20Bill Simmons?

  Oh, that does look Broncos over the Raiders just to win by three and then the Lions to win by three. That sounds great.

• 1:29:26Speaker 01

  There's another one for you.

• 1:29:27Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I see it here in the poop fact list.

• 1:29:30Speaker 01

  You see it?

• 1:29:30Bill Simmons?

  Bills Dolphins.

• 1:29:31Speaker 01

  That's the one.

• 1:29:32Bill Simmons?

  Bills in Miami. DJ Mikey Mac staying for the rest of the year.

• 1:29:38Speaker 01

  Guess so.

• 1:29:39Bill Simmons?

  He's gonna be spinning his records for seven more weeks here. I have Bills by nine over the Dolphins.

• 1:29:46Speaker 01

  I had nine and I got this exactly nine and a half it is.

• 1:29:51Speaker 01

  So there you go. Who screws that up? Bills just to beat Miami, Detroit just to beat Washington.

• 1:29:59Bill Simmons?

  Is it wrong that I'm still scared of Miami after that Falcons game?

• 1:30:04Speaker 01

  Extended rest, they're home. They played them tough when they played on that Thursday night, right? They covered. Yeah. Yeah, you shouldn't be scared.

• 1:30:13Bill Simmons?

  I gotta ask you, how many wins did the Dolphins end up with? Cause I may or may not have multiple win total unders at six and a half and four and a half and three and a half on them for the season.

• 1:30:24Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 1:30:24Bill Simmons?

  Right now they have two wins.

• 1:30:25Speaker 01

  Right?

• 1:30:26Bill Simmons?

  They played the Bills, so that's a loss. They play the commanders in Madrid. Saints home, at Jets, at Steelers, Bengals home, Bucks at Patriots. Six seems improbable, right?

• 1:30:40Speaker 01

  Jets and Bengals, they have to split that for you to sweep the board here.

• 1:30:43Bill Simmons?

  Four and thirteen, four and thirteen. I win, I think every bet I made except one that was.

• 1:30:48Speaker 01

  Good for you. Yeah. Don't get beat by the Jets or get beat by the Jets.

• 1:30:53Bill Simmons?

  At Pat's week 18.

• 1:30:55Speaker 01

  Oh. Two seed that doesn't care. Oh, boy.

• 1:31:01Bill Simmons?

  I'll be able to hedge it.

• 1:31:05Bill Simmons?

  All right. Poop facta. Bears home for the Giants.

• 1:31:11Bill Simmons?

  We don't apologize for wins. We're three and one in the second quarter.

• 1:31:19Speaker 01

  Thanks, Coach. I wasn't planning on it.

• 1:31:22Speaker 01

  You apologize to the dry cleaner? Who's he supposed to apologize to?

• 1:31:25Bill Simmons?

  He might need a sedative before those speeches. He's like too jacked up. He gets too fired up.

• 1:31:30Speaker 01

  I think Caleb Williams should paint his nails before every game. Just calm him down a little.

• 1:31:36Bill Simmons?

  I thought Caleb was pretty good today.

• 1:31:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:39Bill Simmons?

  But then I kept remembering that he was playing the Bengals.

• 1:31:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:43Bill Simmons?

  You just had to keep remembering. It was like watching your, one of your sons play a video game, but it's on the all rookie level and you're like, whoa, Harrison's doing really well in this game. And it's like the easiest level possible.

• 1:31:54Speaker 01

  You know what he was good at though? Like, all right, the guy's wide open. Sure, the secondary sucks. He was pretty nifty in the pocket. Like there were a bunch of times I thought he was going to get sacked and that like to me, that's not all the, the front seven's fault, you know, they had a paw on him a bunch, but he was, he was good escaping.

• 1:32:12Bill Simmons?

  I had him on two of my fantasy teams and had very high hopes from that Bengals game.

• 1:32:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:32:17Bill Simmons?

  The Bengals defense might be the first defense we've had in a while where you just want to start whatever quarterback is going against them. I think it guaranteed 25 fantasy points.

• 1:32:27Speaker 01

  Flacco is just, uh, you just, you see it in his face. It's just exhausted. These guys just want to kill all the defended. What'd they score? Like 38? Two games in a row, the only team to lose? Both games after scoring 30? Ever? That doesn't seem right.

• 1:32:42Bill Simmons?

  Jets, Browns in New Jersey.

• 1:32:47Bill Simmons?

  This, I mean,

• 1:32:51Bill Simmons?

  this is like first pick. This is first pick in the draft, maybe.

• 1:32:56Speaker 01

  Oh, you think?

• 1:32:57Bill Simmons?

  Like, no, just it's in the like Jets, Browns, Saints. Those are probably three of the

• 1:33:01Speaker 01

  Titans. No?

• 1:33:03Bill Simmons?

  And Titans. But I, I thought the Titans looked pretty encouraging today against the Chargers. I had that game on. I thought they looked all right.

• 1:33:08Speaker 01

  They just had a good start. They had a couple of big fluky plays.

• 1:33:12Bill Simmons?

  K. Moore looked good in that game.

• 1:33:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:33:13Bill Simmons?

  I have a Jets minus one and a half at home.

• 1:33:17Speaker 01

  You nailed it. I do. I thought tic, tic tac, but I really, I don't know why I thought the Browns would be favored by one and a half, but one and a half.

• 1:33:24Bill Simmons?

  I'm really worried I'm going to put this in Ringer 107 as a, as the Browns plus one and a half.

• 1:33:31Speaker 01

  Right, cuz you always love

• 1:33:32Bill Simmons?

  Just their defense.

• 1:33:33Speaker 01

  Gabriel on the road, you always love it.

• 1:33:36Bill Simmons?

  Well, that's why I hope I don't do that. But I just keep thinking of the Browns defense against the Jets just sounds delicious.

• 1:33:43Speaker 01

  Would this be a fun one to put your door in if you were ever gonna try him out? In New York. Big, good game, right?

• 1:33:53Bill Simmons?

  The Sanders family needs something. Deion's getting annihilated in Colorado.

• 1:33:59Bill Simmons?

  Panthers home against the Saints with a chance to go six and four. Their over under was six and a half.

• 1:34:06Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:34:07Bill Simmons?

  I have the Panthers by three and a half.

• 1:34:10Speaker 01

  Uh, I said five and a half, so we split that. It's four and a half.

• 1:34:14Bill Simmons?

  No.

• 1:34:15Speaker 01

  The Saints can't be on the road getting less than to a five, to a five win team.

• 1:34:22Bill Simmons?

  I'm not sure the Saints are gonna win again.

• 1:34:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:34:26Bill Simmons?

  Sunday night.

• 1:34:26Speaker 01

  The mother, the mother shockers didn't have a ton.

• 1:34:30Bill Simmons?

  Sunday night Chargers Steelers in LA with, there's gonna be a lot of Steelers fans.

• 1:34:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:34:37Bill Simmons?

  A lot, like a lot.

• 1:34:39Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 1:34:41Bill Simmons?

  And I have the Chargers by, uh, two and a half.

• 1:34:45Speaker 01

  Uh, you edged me out here. I said two and it's three. Did you win again? Five, six, seven, eight, one, two, three, four, five. That's it?

• 1:34:54Bill Simmons?

  No, we got a Monday night game.

• 1:34:55Speaker 01

  We didn't do Giants, uh, Bears, did we?

• 1:34:59Bill Simmons?

  Did we pick it? I guess we talked about it and didn't actually pick it.

• 1:35:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:35:03Bill Simmons?

  Bears home for the Giants. I had Bears by five and a half.

• 1:35:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, I had five and it's three and a half.

• 1:35:09Bill Simmons?

  Oh, so you win that one.

• 1:35:10Speaker 01

  I don't think that's enough, though. One, two, three, four, five, six, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. What happened? We ran out of games. These teams can't be on buys. I need more games here.

• 1:35:20Bill Simmons?

  I'm sorry.

• 1:35:20Speaker 01

  Again.

• 1:35:24Bill Simmons?

  Sunday night Chargers Steelers.

• 1:35:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, we did it.

• 1:35:27Bill Simmons?

  No, I know, but it just.

• 1:35:28Speaker 01

  Let's do it again.

• 1:35:30Bill Simmons?

  Lot of Aaron Rodgers in in primetime games.

• 1:35:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:35:35Bill Simmons?

  Right? And it seemed dubious before the year, but they've actually been pretty entertaining.

• 1:35:40Speaker 01

  This works out.

• 1:35:42Bill Simmons?

  Monday night Packers Eagles.

• 1:35:44Speaker 01

  Sorry, before I move on, they are gonna have to move Washington out. Washington's got some prime slots here.

• 1:35:51Speaker 01

  They they play in Denver on Sunday Night Football. They play, can you bounce a Madrid game? A Madrid game against the Dolphins? That's pretty bad. Washington against Miami.

• 1:36:00Bill Simmons?

  Might that might, instead of a loser leaves town, there might be a loser stays here match.

• 1:36:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:36:05Bill Simmons?

  Loser just has to stay in Madrid.

• 1:36:06Speaker 01

  The globe. Yeah.

• 1:36:08Bill Simmons?

  Oh, man. Hey, Madrid, we hope you guys like football. Here's Tua Tagliavola and Marcus Mariota.

• 1:36:17Bill Simmons?

  We hope you like this.

• 1:36:18Speaker 01

  Good luck pronouncing their names.

• 1:36:22Speaker 01

  And then watching.

• 1:36:23Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, so they have Washington's on that. I mean, at all those TV games you listed, the Christmas one's probably the biggest hit.

• 1:36:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, against my team, right?

• 1:36:32Bill Simmons?

  Really tough one. Yeah, cuz that's one of those where you don't, you're not going to the streamer intentionally.

• 1:36:39Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:36:40Bill Simmons?

  You're not like stumbling across that one. All right, Sunday night or Monday night, we have Packers Eagles, which I mentioned, I have Packers in Green Bay favored by two and a half.

• 1:36:52Speaker 01

  All right, well, you so you win anyway. I said two. It is two and a half. And watch the Packers be great. And we're talking about how they're the best team in the league again cuz they look, they look past the Panthers.

• 1:37:05Bill Simmons?

  Let's all agree not to do that again. They burned our trust too many times.

• 1:37:09Speaker 01

  I don't get it. I don't get it. I also think if you wear like 1920s outfits, you're destined to play that way a little bit. You're gonna go three yards a clip and then you're gonna get stuck on fourth down and that's that.

• 1:37:22Bill Simmons?

  Not to step on parent corner, but the Packers are like my son where it's like,

• 1:37:27Bill Simmons?

  when are you gonna be home? I'm gonna be home at 3:30. Let's hang out. And then he comes home at like 7:30. It's like, I think you're gonna be home at 3:30. Oh, yeah.

• 1:37:35Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:37:35Bill Simmons?

  I went there instead. Now I'm home. And after a while, when he, when he gives me a time, I just don't believe it until he actually walks through the front door.

• 1:37:44Speaker 01

  The times of the spreads. Should we guess like what time Ben's?

• 1:37:47Bill Simmons?

  I don't trust the Packers at all anymore. The Packers like, we're gonna win. We're taking this seriously. We're going for the Super Bowl. It's like, cool.

• 1:37:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:37:53Bill Simmons?

  I don't trust you.

• 1:37:53Speaker 01

  I think that should be added to a line. All right. Ben says he's gonna be home at 3:30. All right. What, Bill, what'd you pick?

• 1:37:59Bill Simmons?

  Sounds like 7:25.

• 1:38:01Speaker 01

  I put 5:15. Ooh, you get it. I picked 6:30.

• 1:38:04Bill Simmons?

  He had a good one today. He said 1:30 and he came home at 5:30, which is anytime he can be an extra four. And there's always a weird excuse too.

• 1:38:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:38:12Bill Simmons?

  Always something with like the girlfriend. Oh, we had, we didn't realize we had to study. It's always that we didn't realize.

• 1:38:17Speaker 01

  He's like a mattress delivery company. He gets a four hour window, right?

• 1:38:22Bill Simmons?

  Or it's a spectrum cable.

• 1:38:23Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:38:24Bill Simmons?

  Be there between nine and one. Uh, all right. Uh, that's it for guest alliance. I'm sorry, Warren.

• 1:38:31Speaker 01

  Screw you.

• 1:38:33Bill Simmons?

  We do have.

• 1:38:36Bill Simmons?

  We do have a, I don't have the, the parent corner. I guess I'll have to do that read. I don't have the read for that. See, this is what happens when we're live on YouTube.

• 1:38:48Bill Simmons?

  I'll do, we'll just have to insert it in after the fact. Uh, parent corner, go ahead. Let's hear what we got.

• 1:38:53Speaker 01

  All right. So, um, you know, so we're, we're trying to raise funds for Cooperstown, which is, uh, the end of July, right? So this is, uh, my 12 year old Harrison's team goes up there and it costs like a lot of money. So we want to offset a few of the costs. So one of the parents runs a, like a little league, league actually, and has access to fields and was nice enough to throw a fundraiser where all eight year old teams from all over the area would come and play. And the 12 year olds, Harrison and his buddies would umpire, right? So they had to go through some slight training, but they, you know, whatever. They're, they're bumping eight year old games. So it's okay. So Harrison's gonna ump for games this weekend. Two yesterday, two today, and I'm not going to watch him ump two games, right? There's too much college football for me to bet on, so.

• 1:39:38Bill Simmons?

  Wait, you were expected as a parent to watch him be an umpire?

• 1:39:42Speaker 01

  I don't think so, but he had to get there and I had to pick him up. So when I picked him up, I caught the end of his second game and he did fine. Like he didn't screw up, right? You know, it was just two close plays at first and that was it. So, um, and then he went back today and my wife Melissa was in charge of it. So I get home from watching games today and she says to me, she's like, uh, I was like, how did he do today? She's like, well, I thought he did well, but one of the fathers was complaining about a couple of his calls. I'm like, what? I was like, you were watching and you saw this? She's like, yeah, he was pissed that his kid's team lost. And he's like, well, we probably would have won if there weren't so many botched calls. And I was like, well, he was probably kidding around. Did he know? Harris is like, no, he wasn't kidding. And I said, well, did you say anything to him? She's like, no, he's an idiot.

• 1:40:28Speaker 01

  And I said, well, who was it? And he says, I don't know. I think Michelle knows who it is. I'm like, well, tell Michelle to tell me who the fuck it is. Cause now I gotta, who the hell is going off on a 12 year old umpire in an eight year old game? She's like, well, he didn't yell anything. He was just very vocal. And I'm like, yeah, that's enough if he was vocal and like pointing out my son, like that's, that's weird. So, um, she's like, well, what are you going to do? I'm like, I'll, I'll think of something. And so I said to Harrison, I'm like, what, what happened? He's like, dad, I was right about both calls. The runner came off the base. He came off second base twice. Uh, it happened like within an inning and I called him out. I was, I was like right there. So I was like really pissed off. Like, I don't know what I'm going to do, but, uh, you know, Michelle, if, uh, if you're listening, I want names. I want to find out. I need to know who this is.

• 1:41:12Speaker 01

  And then I realized like an hour before the podcast, I'm like, this was me four years ago. So what, what can I really do here?

• 1:41:20Bill Simmons?

  It's all come full circle.

• 1:41:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, it really is such a mess. I still want his name.

• 1:41:25Bill Simmons?

  I still can't believe you haven't been in a, a near altercation on the sidelines. Keep waiting and see that on TMZ Sports.

• 1:41:32Speaker 01

  Would that be just the best to catch that?

• 1:41:35Bill Simmons?

  I love it.

• 1:41:36Speaker 01

  Didn't what's her name get arrested for that, uh, Jana Soprano? Wasn't that an episode during the soccer game?

• 1:41:43Bill Simmons?

  Remember a million parent corners ago, my wife got into it with some older lady who was the grandmother of another team and was going off on the lady.

• 1:41:50Speaker 01

  Right, right, right, right. Yeah, grandmothers are, they're rough. They are really, uh, they get in there.

• 1:41:56Bill Simmons?

  Well, I found the sponsor, by the way. Today's parent corner is brought to you by Workday. Are you a forward thinker? Then you need an HR and finance platform that thinks like you do. Workday is the AI platform that helps propel your organization, your workforce, your entire industry into the future. Workday, moving business forever forward. Learn more at workday.com. Uh, my parent corner, my son turned 18 this weekend.

• 1:42:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, I saw that. Good job.

• 1:42:23Bill Simmons?

  When they get to 18, it's, it's different than when you have a daughter that gets with the sons. It's like you just start thinking of all the missed calls where they may not have made it to 18.

• 1:42:33Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:42:33Bill Simmons?

  The, the times they almost went to death or, you know, the, the time when they fell or they almost fell down the stairs or they dropped a rock on their foot. It's weird. It's, it's not exactly, uh, you're not just thinking, uh, it's not like a Hallmark card. It's just missed calls. Uh, but we had a party and then, um, my son was supposed to be home today to help, uh, help clean up after backyard, some stuff out there and, um, instead took his girlfriend to breakfast and then, um, somehow ended up back at her place and then told us that she got him as one of his birthday gifts, uh, a puppy yoga session. Are you familiar with these?

• 1:43:16Speaker 01

  What is that?

• 1:43:17Bill Simmons?

  So this is something, this is like an LA thing. That's pretty funny actually, but I've, I've never done it.

• 1:43:24Speaker 01

  I'm gonna hate this. What is it?

• 1:43:25Bill Simmons?

  It's in Burbank. It's, you relax, stretch and cuddle puppies in a unique yoga experience.

• 1:43:34Bill Simmons?

  So that's what my son was doing at some point today and he was supposed to come home at one thirty to clean up and came home when it was dark at five thirty and then immediately started making himself food. And I was like, you're gonna clean up in the back. And he said, Dad, I haven't eaten yet. And I was just like, happy birthday. I'm glad he made it to eighteen. He's now like, more like a roommate.

• 1:43:54Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:43:54Bill Simmons?

  I would say more, less like a son, more like a roommate that we're renting out a studio, one bedroom apartment to in the second floor of our house.

• 1:44:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:44:03Bill Simmons?

  And he just kind of comes in and you have to go in and you have to go like, hey, uh, hey, the cable bill, it's, you know, we, we gotta pay the last two months. I just need a check or Ben, mom, yeah, yeah, I'll get to it. I'll get to it. Um, yeah. Happy eighteen to Ben.

• 1:44:20Speaker 01

  I'm gonna, I have to hit him up. I'm gonna contact him because you're not, you're not focused on the right thing. You want him to clean the fucking backyard. Who cares? Uh, he should not be doing puppy yoga. He can't, he can't do it. He can't. This is a gift your girlfriend gives you.

• 1:44:34Bill Simmons?

  Puppy, puppy yoga club.

• 1:44:35Speaker 01

  You say, thank you. Uh, I'm gonna go. And then you lie to her and say you went and it was great, but, uh, you don't need to do it again. But they went together. They probably went together.

• 1:44:43Bill Simmons?

  They went together.

• 1:44:45Speaker 01

  Oh, Ben. All right.

• 1:44:49Speaker 01

  Puppy yoga.

• 1:44:53Bill Simmons?

  We went through a lot of the college app process and which I know you went through with, uh, with Archie and it's just so different than when we were applying to college a million years ago.

• 1:45:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:45:04Bill Simmons?

  There's like early decision. There's early action. There's the Common App. There's these essays, but then there's like these 200 word little mini essays where they tie it to what school, what, what, how do you see something like specific to the school and all these

• 1:45:21Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:45:21Bill Simmons?

  little things and they, they try to flip stuff around and try to find out more of you. I was thinking about how haphazard it was.

• 1:45:27Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:45:28Bill Simmons?

  When we were going to college.

• 1:45:28Speaker 01

  Oh, it didn't matter.

• 1:45:29Bill Simmons?

  It was like, where are you applying? I don't know these schools. And then it's like, yeah, there's like an essay and then you gotta send them a transcript.

• 1:45:35Speaker 01

  Fifty bucks.

• 1:45:35Bill Simmons?

  Get two teachers.

• 1:45:36Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:45:36Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:37Speaker 01

  Did he, does he have regrets? Does he have anything Carrie's yelling at him saying, I told you, you should have worked here or you should have volunteered here? Because that's, that's a lot.

• 1:45:46Bill Simmons?

  Well, no, it's actually, it worked out great because he's writing a 650 word essay about how the puppy yoga class changed his life.

• 1:45:53Speaker 01

  Good. Rejected.

• 1:45:55Bill Simmons?

  How, how puppy yoga taught me a more sensitive side of myself.

• 1:46:01Bill Simmons?

  I want to do it now. It sounds great. I gotta, maybe I should have brought him on.

• 1:46:05Speaker 01

  Freaking do it. Let's, let's, you know, we don't have to be that gritty, but come on.

• 1:46:11Bill Simmons?

  Speaking of parent quarter.

• 1:46:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:46:14Bill Simmons?

  My daughter's in the playoffs next week for soccer.

• 1:46:17Speaker 01

  Oh, nice.

• 1:46:17Bill Simmons?

  And had a great season and it was really fun to watch our, the D three athletes cross the board. There's a lot of colleges. These kids are 18, 19, 20, 21, 22 grad school students. They're doing all their stuff and then on the side also playing for these teams and they're committed to it. And it's just cool. Like I, I really think like for, if you care about sports, like the D three athletes, putting in the time when they don't really have to, you know, it's not like they're going to school for scholarship and it's almost like a job and they're, they made a commitment. Like this is a little different.

• 1:46:52Speaker 01

  Are you going out there for it?

• 1:46:54Bill Simmons?

  Of course I'm going out there.

• 1:46:55Speaker 01

  Does she, do you feel like she gets more nervous or I mean, I'm sure she's appreciative.

• 1:47:00Bill Simmons?

  She likes when I go. Maybe 10 years ago would have been more nervous.

• 1:47:03Speaker 01

  Oh, really? Look at you. You're all grown up. Nice.

• 1:47:05Bill Simmons?

  No, I just go. I have my little spots. I don't do the pacing and it's really fun. Only this is it. Second to last year ever.

• 1:47:12Speaker 01

  If for whatever reason, there's a 12 year old ref, take it easy on him, right?

• 1:47:16Bill Simmons?

  There might be a 12 year old ref for the round one playoff game. We'll see. Anyway, good luck to, uh, good luck to Emerson. Good luck to everybody in the puppy yoga class and.

• 1:47:26Speaker 01

  That's a baby doll. Good luck, by the way.

• 1:47:29Bill Simmons?

  That was today's parent quarter. It was sponsored by workday.com. Learn more at workday.com. So we completed October. We reached daylight savings time. We got through the world series. NBA is starting to calm down a little bit. Now we have actually a feel for the teams and what's happening. Football is in the, in the grind. Are you starting to get sad about football? This is right when it really starts to hit you.

• 1:47:55Speaker 01

  No, not yet. Not yet. Should I be? You tell me when I think.

• 1:47:59Bill Simmons?

  We're almost at the halfway point now. We're at the halfway point of the regular season. Right? Headed toward Thanksgiving.

• 1:48:07Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:48:07Speaker 01

  Playoffs.

• 1:48:08Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I guess we're now you start to get sad like after Thanksgiving is when

• 1:48:13Speaker 01

  Right. I would say that's, that's it. Yes. Right. After all the food is wrapped up and given away on Thanksgiving. I was definitely, I'm not gonna lie. I was definitely sad when Jordan Love threw that pass in the end zone to a guy in

• 1:48:26Bill Simmons?

  Puppy yoga there, right?

• 1:48:27Speaker 01

  He really did. That was a puppy yoga pass of the year.

• 1:48:30Bill Simmons?

  Panthers.

• 1:48:31Speaker 01

  So that was it. But yeah.

• 1:48:34Bill Simmons?

  All right.

• 1:48:34Speaker 01

  And by the way, I bet, I'm sorry, I bet against your Celtics. I thought you were too, too high on the Celtics packing it in. And I told House Wednesday, I'm like, I'm taking Boston over Cleveland here at home. I'm taking the money line. And, uh, and there you go. So you're gonna bounce, you're gonna jump back here. They're gonna, they're gonna make a run at the NBA cup. And then they're gonna suck again, right?

• 1:48:55Bill Simmons?

  It's weird them and Indiana. There's just so much infrastructure from being good once upon a time that like Indiana beat Golden State last night.

• 1:49:03Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:49:04Bill Simmons?

  This guy, Quentin Jackson, Carlisle is just regenerating guards in his garage that you've never heard of. And the guy had like 25 points and assists.

• 1:49:14Bill Simmons?

  But they're, you know, there's proud dudes on each team and they play these games and they're especially like national TV or against a good team and they So I don't know. I, I feel like all these teams are going to be probably closer to 500. I wonder if the league's so deep now that, uh, we're just gonna see a lot of weird Charlotte beat who? Phoenix, like Phoenix beat San Antonio today. Makes no sense. San Antonio hadn't lost all year. Phoenix beat them by 20 and shut down Wemby. You know, all these teams are, are pretty talented.

• 1:49:44Speaker 01

  You were very excited about our, our NBA cup, uh, parlay that you, you put together. We're like, all right.

• 1:49:50Bill Simmons?

  Oh yeah. What was that? Read that one.

• 1:49:52Speaker 01

  Uh, oh shit. Now I don't have it.

• 1:49:54Bill Simmons?

  Philadelphia, Milwaukee,

• 1:49:56Speaker 01

  San Antonio.

• 1:49:57Bill Simmons?

  San Antonio and OKC. It was 116 to one on Fanduel.

• 1:50:01Speaker 01

  Just to win their groups, right?

• 1:50:04Bill Simmons?

  To win their groups. And then Philadelphia lost to Boston.

• 1:50:07Speaker 01

  That's all right. We'll get it back.

• 1:50:08Bill Simmons?

  But they can still, they can still get there. Yeah. We were excited. We needed something to make the NBA cup more fun. All right, cuz we'll see you on the Ring of Gamble show Tuesday.

• 1:50:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:50:17Bill Simmons?

  Wednesday. Friday.

• 1:50:20Speaker 01

  And then the pregame show.

• 1:50:21Bill Simmons?

  Maybe at the end of the year, we'll have you rank the shows and see which one you like the most.

• 1:50:24Speaker 01

  Right. Okay, good.

• 1:50:25Bill Simmons?

  And then Raheem, did we settle the thing where he tried to cheat on the Sunday pregame show or no?

• 1:50:30Speaker 01

  We didn't settle it. I don't know what, you could have settled it and you could have said minus 120s or, or less.

• 1:50:34Bill Simmons?

  I think minus 120 should be the, the highest you can go on a single bet.

• 1:50:38Speaker 01

  He gets mad because he thinks they're moving during the show, but it never moves against them. I just, I, anyway, he lost. He wanted to take the Chargers minus nine and a half and, uh, not 10 or 10 and a half as Vandal had it. And so, uh, whatever, I gave it to him, but still in first place.

• 1:50:56Bill Simmons?

  All right. That's it. We're wrapping it up here on YouTube.

• 1:51:00Bill Simmons?

  Cuz, as always, great job by you.

• 1:51:02Speaker 01

  Good job by you.

• 1:51:05Bill Simmons?

  All right. That's it for the podcast. Thanks to Cousin Sal. Thanks to Jonathan and Eduardo as well. Uh, I'm going to be back with the rewatchables Monday night. I'm not sure of the schedule of my podcast this week because I'm going back east to watch some soccer. So I know we're going to have a Thursday podcast and hopefully one more during the week. So stay tuned, bear with me. And, uh, I will see you a little bit later in the week on this feed.

• 1:51:41Bill Simmons?

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• 1:52:41Speaker 02

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