Threesomes, Kinks, and "Cheating Together" with Weezy and Mandii B

Strap in for a wild ride with Weezy WTF and Mandii B, hosts of Decisions Decisions podcast and authors of their debut book No Holes Barred, as we discuss all things sexual exploration. We talk about open relationships – what "cheating together" means, jealousy as a turn-on, and what people don't understand about being open/polyamorous. We also discuss threesomes, cucking (and light cucking by way of telling your partner about other sexual experiences), being a side chick, drunk sex, and on the deeper side, settling for toxic relationships and getting out of threatening situations with men. And we ask them a burning question – "Are you actually friends?" Before Mandii and Weezy join us, we're talking about hooking up at work and sharing our past experiences, previewing our upcoming European trip, and we have an Azul update (don't worry, he's fine). Enjoy! Follow Mandii on Instagram @fullcourtpumps and Weezy @weezywtf, listen to their podcast Decisions Decisions, and get their book No Holes Barred. Follow us @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit girlsgottaeat.com for more. Thank you to our partners this week: Wix: Go to wix.com to start building your website. Bilt: Get points by paying rent at https://joinbilt.com/GGE. Quince: Get free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order at https://quince.com/GGE. Simply Pop: Go to https://cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop. Nutrafol: Get $10 off your first month's subscription + free shipping when you subscribe at https://nutrafol.com with code GGE10. Hungryroot: Get 40% off your first box + get a free item in every box for life at http://hungryroot.com/gge with code GGE. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  It's like two women figuring out where they fit. Whether it's their own sexuality, someone else's sexuality, judgment, pain, heartbreak, overcoming trauma, like existing as like this liberated person.

• 0:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  This podcast is a Dear Media production.

• 0:31Rayna Greenberg?

  Hi, guys.

• 0:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  Hi, guys.

• 0:33Rayna Greenberg?

  Welcome back to another episode of Girls Gotta Eat.

• 0:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  Welcome back. Very demure episode today.

• 0:40Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, I was like, wait, what?

• 0:41Ashley Hesseltine?

  What were you gonna say?

• 0:42Rayna Greenberg?

  I was gonna say, today starts my summer tradition of being in Europe for like three weeks. I'm gonna be on an insufferability level of like 10 and I really have had to have some self-talk with myself about how much I'm posting. I was really good in the fall when I went to Europe and I'm gonna try to reel it in.

• 0:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 0:59Rayna Greenberg?

  Relatively.

• 1:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  Mute Raina, everybody.

• 1:01Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm gonna be really insufferable, but I'm really excited. I'm starting in London. I get to spend the night with my nephew and I'm so excited to see him. And then we are going to Greece.

• 1:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  We're going to Greece. This was last minute for me. I just realized that when the final friend joined this trip, I felt like I got punched in the face. Like when you guys were on the group chat and I found out Jackie was going, I was like, I have to go. Cause I didn't really plan a big vacation this year. I'm getting married, I'm on tour. Like I'm gone every weekend now really through the summer and all kinds of different things and bachelorettes and all the things. I was like, I don't need to, I don't need to do it. And then I just got too much FOMO.

• 1:41Rayna Greenberg?

  I didn't want to tell you that Jackie had signed up for the trip. Also, because you never know if Jackie's gonna come on a trip.

• 1:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's true.

• 1:46Rayna Greenberg?

  She's my friend that will tell you she is on her way to the airport and I'm like, I don't trust it. Text me a selfie from the plane.

• 1:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  So today, on the 30th, if that's when you're listening, we are leaving for Greece. I'm leaving for Greece. You're just leaving a few hours before me. We're just on different flights. You're just stopping in London and you're gonna meet you, I'll meet you there.

• 2:04Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, I'll meet you there.

• 2:05Ashley Hesseltine?

  So we'll be there this week. Follow along.

• 2:07Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm so excited.

• 2:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  I cannot wait to be on a boat in Greece on July 4th and write, America who? And see if the DMs come in. What are the odds? I cannot wait to be on this boat with my big foupitwot, my long vagina. It's big foupitwot summer, y'all.

• 2:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's trash horse bitch summer. We're gonna milk it.

• 2:30Rayna Greenberg?

  We're gonna fill some content.

• 2:31Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 2:31Rayna Greenberg?

  But I'm really excited. We went back to Miquino's and we're gonna go to Santorini. It'll be my first time in Santorini and Paros and Naus. So I'm just really excited.

• 2:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  But anyway, as I was saying, crazy episode today. Strap in, not safe for work. Maybe, maybe work. We'll be talking about what people are trying to be doing at work. Yeah, but we have Mandy and Wheezy and it's so much fun. And so we are excited for you guys to listen to it, but we'll talk about our partners and then we will get into it.

• 2:55Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, thanks to Wix. Go to wix.com and start building your website. And Bilt, get points by paying rent at joinbilt.com/gge. And Quince, get free shipping and 365 day returns on your next order at quince.com/gge.

• 3:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  And thank you to Simply Pop. Go to cokeurl.com/simplypop to find out where you can try Simply Pop. And Nutriful, get $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping when you subscribe at nutrafol.com with code GGE10. And thank you to Hungry Root. Get 40% off your first box plus a free item in every box for life at hungryroot.com/gge with code GGE. So we have been dealing with some trauma over here.

• 3:40Rayna Greenberg?

  I did not know how to participate. We did, I didn't know what to say.

• 3:43Ashley Hesseltine?

  So Azul is at the vet as we speak and he went in for a dental cleaning, which dental cleanings are anesthesia. At least they should be according to my vet. Some people are doing them non-esthetic. We don't believe in that, but you know, it's your pet. And Dr. Lisa Littman has talked about why you shouldn't do that. What bottom line is it's a whole thing. He's there all day. He's under anesthesia. He gets his teeth cleaned. And I was just worried they were gonna tell me he needed to get some teeth pulled. And if you know Azul, you know, he's a very specific look. And when I rescued him, he had some really damaged teeth. They had to pull one. It was just really like rotted. And then they had to pull another one from the front. And so you're supposed to have these little six incisors across the front.

• 4:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  And his stick out, he has this underbite and they stick out of his like black gums and he has like a black tongue. And so he is missing two, so he's only had four. And They're like talking about needing to pull them. I feel so sad. And just for, for reasons that you need to get teeth pulled, you know, like they're not healthy and they could be causing him some discomfort. He doesn't express any of that to me. He seems really happy and you know, he does no trouble eating and having treats and whatever, picking stuff up of his teeth. And there are some other ones they want to pull. And so it was a tough phone call to get and you know, it's, it's difficult because I had a feeling it was coming. So I was like waiting by the phone and he's under anesthesia. So you have to like kind of make the call quickly, you know, like I go in there. I just want a cleaning and you know, x-rays and a checkup.

• 5:12Ashley Hesseltine?

  And then knowing that they might be like, we have to pull a bunch of teeth and they call you and it's so expensive and I want to do what's right for him. But I was just like, I feel not ready to do this today. Like I feel not ready to make this decision to pull 10 teeth, including the whole front of his mouth.

• 5:27Rayna Greenberg?

  That's crazy.

• 5:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  His whole look.

• 5:29Rayna Greenberg?

  When they said 10 teeth, I was like, I don't, I can't make eye contact with her right now. I don't know what to say.

• 5:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  And anyone who wants to give me like medical advice, I have a vet, I like, I'm going to hear it from the people in my circle. So it's just like, of course people always want to weigh in when it comes to medical stuff, but I want to talk to Dr. Lisa and figure out what's best for me and what's best for him. And obviously I don't want him to be unhealthy or in any discomfort in any way. Like I'm not going to keep his teeth just for aesthetic reasons. But I was just like, I'm not ready to make, I have to talk to Dr. Lisa. She wasn't available. Like this is a lot to make this decision. I might want to see a dental specialist. Like it's a crazy thing.

• 6:03Rayna Greenberg?

  I also couldn't believe how quickly they, I was like, when do you need to make this decision? You're like, right now. They called you back 15 minutes later.

• 6:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, it's one of those things. They, they put them under and then they do the things and then they have to know if you're okay with it. And they call you and they're like, all these extractions, here's the price. And you're like whiplash. And so, I mean, some people would be like, yeah, do it. I trust you and I do trust my vet, but he does this, but he's not a dental specialist. I want to talk to, I don't have to like justify my decision, but I was like, we just need to wait a beat.

• 6:32Rayna Greenberg?

  That is a huge overhaul. His whole mouth. I would need a minute to digest this.

• 6:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes, like I don't trust medical professionals, well, some of them. Yeah, like it's not even that. I was just like, this is a lot. He did some other stuff in there that he wanted to take care of. And again, it wasn't like this is an emergency because If it was, then we would have done it. But I was like, I just need to make this decision. I need to have one more photo shoot. Like, he's, that's his whole brand.

• 6:53Rayna Greenberg?

  You gotta talk to him about it, that he's gonna look different.

• 6:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  Something that defines your whole look. It's gonna be gone. Like, I could cry.

• 7:02Rayna Greenberg?

  They're so small now, and I just, I needed months, years to process this. So I understand it. It's like a huge body change.

• 7:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  So I just feel like it's, it's, it's a hard thing to deal with, and I just need to figure out what to do, and I'll do what's right for him.

• 7:17Rayna Greenberg?

  I would need more than 15 minutes with a medical decision like that.

• 7:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  It was five minutes. Like, it's literally like, hey, he's under. Let us know.

• 7:24Rayna Greenberg?

  We're gonna charge 4K to your car.

• 7:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  So it's crazy. On top of like what I'm dealing with with my teeth, and I don't wanna get into that, but like.

• 7:32Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, at first he threw out the number nine, like 900 something. I was like, okay, that's kind of a lot, but like, I guess. And then he was like, oh, no, it's like 4,000.

• 7:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  Thousand, yeah, so much money. Like, a dental in general, because it's x-rays, it's anesthesia, it's whatever. And I don't, I don't go to like a dirt cheap place, you know? So, I don't know. It's just like, I cannot believe what we're dealing with in my family with teeth. Like, my gum graft, I don't wanna get into it. It was partially successful. I'm supposed to get two wisdom teeth pulled. I'm supposed to have more gum grafting. I've had to have cavities filled this year. Like, what is happening?

• 8:03Rayna Greenberg?

  I think it's cute. I think it's cute.

• 8:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  We're working it together.

• 8:05Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, I think it's adorable.

• 8:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  My poor fiance, he's like, I'm surrounded by these fucked up mouths.

• 8:10Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, you're like, you need to accept me and my family. Like, mother, like, son.

• 8:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  So stay tuned, and we'll let you guys know. We know you guys love Azul, and if it's just gonna be like, his whole face changes, like, we'll do a goodbye, and we'll do a whole thing. That's what's gonna have to happen.

• 8:25Rayna Greenberg?

  Let's sell merch with his old face on it.

• 8:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  R.I.P.

• 8:28Rayna Greenberg?

  His old face.

• 8:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  Teeth, yes.

• 8:29Rayna Greenberg?

  His old face.

• 8:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's what I'm dealing with.

• 8:35Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, you keep it for the wedding.

• 8:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  Please respect my privacy this time. Please respect Azul's privacy this time. Okay, Gen Z wants to have sex at the office.

• 8:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Who doesn't?

• 8:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Who hasn't? If you haven't gotten fingered in your office, you are not living, okay? That shit was so fun.

• 8:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  What?

• 8:54Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, I worked in restaurants, dude. You do crazy stuff.

• 8:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  You're in the walk-in.

• 8:58Rayna Greenberg?

  I have done crazy stuff at the restaurants I worked at. Like, when I think about, I gave blowjob like on camera. Like, I was running the tape on like, so I moved to New York City in 2008 with a marketing and advertising degree, and it was the week that the market crashed in the fall, and nobody would hire me, so I started working in restaurants. And I was either the manager fucking a staff member, or a staff member fucking the manager at all three restaurants I worked at, back to back to back. And I really just, I like getting it in at work. It's just, it's fun.

• 9:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  But like, what else are you doing?

• 9:29Rayna Greenberg?

  Nothing.

• 9:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  You know, like, not to degrade restaurant jobs, obviously I've worked in restaurants, you've worked in restaurants, but it's just, it's not the office to me. Like, I'm saying, like, I'm really, this is not what we're talking about. We're talking about people working at Salesforce want to have a cubicle, like, they want to have a, like, nursing room to fuck in.

• 9:44Rayna Greenberg?

  Can I tell you what I did? Can I just run you through this?

• 9:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 9:47Rayna Greenberg?

  It was crazy.

• 9:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 9:48Rayna Greenberg?

  So, my first job in New York City, I worked at this restaurant called Fish Tail, which was for David Burke. I was dating one of the waiters, I jerked him off in a coat closet in the middle of service.

• 9:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, like, in the, like, coat check?

• 9:58Rayna Greenberg?

  In the coat check room, in the middle of service.

• 10:01Ashley Hesseltine?

  Sorry, whoever a coat got cummed on. Yeah, someone's got cum on their coat.

• 10:05Rayna Greenberg?

  I don't think I even finished the job. I think I, like, did a half of it.

• 10:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  If you gave me back my cum-covered coat and still were like, that'll be $10, it's like, absolutely not.

• 10:13Rayna Greenberg?

  That's why I didn't finish it.

• 10:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  I'm doing a charge back on my credit card.

• 10:15Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, I did it out of respect for the patrons. I did not finish jerking him off. And then, I was dating the manager, and everybody, we'd like shut down for the night, where everyone was like cleaning up, and I gave him a blowjob in the middle of the dining room, like, on camera, just on my knees in the dining room.

• 10:31Ashley Hesseltine?

  You're a real slut. You're a real restaurant slut.

• 10:35Rayna Greenberg?

  I really was, and think, that's just the tip of the iceberg.

• 10:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  And that's when you got promoted.

• 10:40Rayna Greenberg?

  I was, the next restaurant I worked at, I was sleeping with one of the bartenders and like after work, I like shut down the restaurant and we, there was cameras everywhere. So you couldn't really fuck there. But I knew there was like one spot in the office where you like could kind of not be on a camera, but I was like, I can't risk it. So him and I went to a bar and then I was like, do you know what would be fun? We should go back to the restaurant and have sex.

• 10:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally.

• 10:59Rayna Greenberg?

  And I went back to the restaurant at two o'clock in the morning and I had sex in my office.

• 11:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh my god.

• 11:05Rayna Greenberg?

  And then.

• 11:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  Not the office.

• 11:07Rayna Greenberg?

  And then where I met my fiance was the next restaurant I worked at.

• 11:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  Perfect. When you hired him?

• 11:12Rayna Greenberg?

  I didn't hire him. Not my hire.

• 11:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, I thought he was.

• 11:16Rayna Greenberg?

  No, he was just like a.

• 11:17Ashley Hesseltine?

  Not as hot.

• 11:17Rayna Greenberg?

  He was, it was not my hire. I, I was like six weeks into the job and I remember talking to Melanie and being like, I'm gonna fuck this waiter. At my, at my dream job. Like I might lose my job for this kid. I've been here for six weeks. So we fucked off campus, but the next day at work, he fingered me in my office, like during service.

• 11:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh my god, this is like baby girl.

• 11:40Rayna Greenberg?

  So I was, all that to say, we'll get back to this article.

• 11:43Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, I love it. Let's just do this.

• 11:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 11:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  You were supposed to be cutting limes and you were getting fingered.

• 11:49Rayna Greenberg?

  I was really getting sexy in the workplace, but listen, it was just like, we all drank all the time and just like did drugs and hung out.

• 11:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  It was a different time.

• 11:56Rayna Greenberg?

  It was a different time. So social. Was that it? I mean, in college, I always fucked people that I worked with in the restaurants.

• 12:03Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't know that I, I never fucked anyone at the restaurant. I, most of the time I had like a restaurant crush. I mean, I remember when I worked at Lone Star, I had a, here's what was like, would happen twice to me. It was that my restaurant crush started dating someone else at the restaurant. That is heartbreaking. So my one restaurant crush, when I worked at Lone Star, started dating this girl there. But it's okay, because like shortly thereafter, that's when Justin from Fridays came in and I started dating, dating the guy that worked at Fridays. I do this in my stand-up. It's a whole thing. So he came in, he was sitting at the bar and I called dibs because he was so hot and like Cory and I both had our eyes on him. I was like, he's mine. And then that kind of softened the blow. But my other crush at a restaurant I worked at in Rehoboth, I remember early days when we were first started training at the very beginning of the summer. I had such a crush on him and he started dating this other girl. She had these

• 12:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  giant tits. I like could not compete. But she was like 25. I was like, ew.

• 12:52Rayna Greenberg?

  How old were you?

• 12:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's like 19.

• 12:54Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, she was so old.

• 12:55Ashley Hesseltine?

  She was old. Yes.

• 12:56Rayna Greenberg?

  An old lady.

• 12:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  I was like, she's 25?

• 12:58Rayna Greenberg?

  Have fun fucking that old mom.

• 13:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  But then Rayna, like I still had such a crush on him and then I heard they fucked at the restaurant.

• 13:07Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh no.

• 13:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  Like when I heard that they were, I was like, they fucked in here? I have to be around it?

• 13:12Rayna Greenberg?

  No.

• 13:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  And then when I worked at the Rudder, I mean, I was just like the D-list. No one to fuck me. I couldn't even carry the cocktail tray. Like Laura was running around, her and her boyfriend were like the power couple of the Rudder and no one wanted to fuck me. But the girl guys were hot and like we would flirt with the girl guys a lot.

• 13:30Rayna Greenberg?

  I really liked, I didn't get back in the kitchen as much. I only fucked the chef.

• 13:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  I always had a dream of fucking in the walk-in on a hot day.

• 13:39Rayna Greenberg?

  It's just, it's too, someone's gonna open that door.

• 13:41Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally.

• 13:42Rayna Greenberg?

  And it opens too wide. There's nowhere to hide. You're just in a room and there's nowhere to hide. And yes, I've thought about this.

• 13:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  Vegetables around you.

• 13:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Yes.

• 13:47Ashley Hesseltine?

  Meats.

• 13:48Rayna Greenberg?

  Yes. And it's just like when the door opens, there's no like, oops, like I wasn't doing this. I only got, I only dated the chef at a restaurant in college. I fucked him at work. I, when I worked at the Cheesecake Factory, I was fucking the manager and another one of the waiters.

• 14:01Ashley Hesseltine?

  And the wait, yeah.

• 14:01Rayna Greenberg?

  I was cheating on them with each other.

• 14:03Ashley Hesseltine?

  With each other. Just, you all were wearing all white. Just running around, come everywhere.

• 14:07Rayna Greenberg?

  I was just giving people hard ons in white pants.

• 14:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  This is so crazy. I mean, the famous quote from Rayna is that her mom wanted her to get an internship during the summer and she was like, all I want to do is suck dick and work at the Cheesecake Factory. And that's what you did.

• 14:19Rayna Greenberg?

  That is what I did. I mean, wow. I really got it in at work. And then I got, I had corporate jobs at Groupon and then Amazon.

• 14:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  And you still did?

• 14:28Rayna Greenberg?

  I know. I fucked off campus for those ones. At Groupon, I think I only slept with one guy because I really liked him. My friends slept with him and then I slept with him. It was a really bad situation.

• 14:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 14:37Rayna Greenberg?

  And then Amazon, I did not sleep with anybody.

• 14:41Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 14:41Rayna Greenberg?

  I ended my streak at Amazon.

• 14:43Ashley Hesseltine?

  I wish you would've. I wish you could out it now.

• 14:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Damn it. No, I really.

• 14:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  It was Jeff.

• 14:47Rayna Greenberg?

  It was, I jerked off Jeff? Jerk off Jeff? Yeah.

• 14:50Ashley Hesseltine?

  You're gonna pay off for that.

• 14:51Rayna Greenberg?

  That's how you know I really didn't enjoy the job. I wasn't even fucking on the job.

• 14:55Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, we did a episode so many years ago, you guys will have to search it, about fucking your coworkers. So you guys can listen back if this conversation is intriguing to you. I never really had the opportunity. I mean, I worked at like a magazine. It was like girls and gays and like PR and then I went on my own. And so, I don't know. I'm trying to think, have I ever fucked anybody like we've hired as a contractor? Usually do that too.

• 15:19Rayna Greenberg?

  I usually do that.

• 15:21Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't think I've ever done it. I was trying to fuck my contractor in the

• 15:25Rayna Greenberg?

  Also, your contractor.

• 15:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  And people that work for us.

• 15:29Rayna Greenberg?

  Exactly. This is your whole brand.

• 15:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  It is my whole brand. Oh, my God.

• 15:36Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 15:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  Did you ever just realize who you were?

• 15:41Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, honestly, in restaurants, it felt like the stakes were just lower. I mean, we were just all getting drunk. Everybody slept with each other. Like, this was like before there was any like standards in the workplace. Like, it just felt like that's what everybody was doing. We're all out late at night together, getting drunk, hooking up.

• 15:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, this is a stupid question, but are restaurants trying to say you can't fuck your coworkers? No.

• 16:03Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, it depends on how corporate it is.

• 16:05Ashley Hesseltine?

  Power dynamic, I guess. But like, can servers fuck each other? Who cares?

• 16:08Rayna Greenberg?

  A lot of workplaces say we don't encourage inner workplace, like, relationships. But like, when I worked for Danny Meyer, who owns Shashak, and I started Union Square with him, I mean, half of the staff was married to other members of the staff that they had met at work. I mean, that's where you meet people. And like, there was nothing more attractive to me than watching somebody just absolutely kill it at their job.

• 16:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. And this isn't even like, when I say servers should be allowed to fuck each other at work, I mean it in the same way that two people that work at Apple should be able to fuck. But when it comes to power dynamics, totally different. But like, people on the same level, like, I don't understand why. What is the rule? Why two people at Apple can't fuck?

• 16:48Rayna Greenberg?

  It just creates messiness because then they break up and then like somebody's dating another person. And like, that's it. But you, I mean, people have free will. You can't tell people what's in their bodies. Yeah, like, be an adult.

• 16:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 16:58Rayna Greenberg?

  Power dynamic, sure. When I started sleeping with my then fiance, he was a waiter, I was the manager. I did not make his schedule. But I told my boss, three weeks in?

• 17:07Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 17:08Rayna Greenberg?

  I was terrified because all I wanted to do was work for Danny Meyer. It was my lifelong dream. I like, read his books. I was like, that's the GOAT. That's who I want to work for. And I was so horny, I had to fuck this waiter six weeks into the job.

• 17:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, that's the thing with this article, that Gen Z wants to fuck at work. Like, how horny are they? It's they want like places to fuck at work and this is not everybody and this could just kind of be clickbait but basically the headline is

• 17:33Rayna Greenberg?

  There's nuance in context.

• 17:34Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes, 38% of Gen Zers want private spaces at work to hook up because work-life balance.

• 17:39Rayna Greenberg?

  So basically this is like a little out of context, the headline, but you know, Gen Z is the first generation that went through the pandemic and then has entered the workplace at a time where you don't have to go to your office. So they've said that it's improved their sex lives being at home all day. They could like have sex in the middle of the afternoon or like wake up and fuck in the morning and just like have a groggy morning and like now they're like, you can't make me go back to work. My life is good at home. I can masturbate or get fucked in the middle of the day. And if you expect me to be here, you need to provide safe spaces for me.

• 18:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  So also, this could be one of those like bullshit surveys. Only 2,000 people were interviewed, whatever. And but yes, like what Raina said, they said that that remote work improved their sex life and they're not willing to sacrifice it. But it's just like, I don't know. Like, I think two people working from home, nothing is less sexy. If that's what's going on.

• 18:26Rayna Greenberg?

  And your man's work voice?

• 18:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, if someone, if you hear a Zoom voice, like if you, someone were to return to the office, I think you'd have a sexier relationship. Someone's at work during the day, they come home, whatever. But it says 38% of Gen Z admit they wish their workplace had a private space, like an on-call room for hookups or self-love, which I love that because like if you're stressed, you should be able to masturbate at work privately. You don't think?

• 18:48Rayna Greenberg?

  A room for self-love. That's hilarious.

• 18:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't know, like go in your car, like you should be

• 18:53Rayna Greenberg?

  Go in your car to masturbate?

• 18:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  You should be able to masturbate at work.

• 18:57Rayna Greenberg?

  That feels so predatory to me, but

• 19:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  But when I talk about masturbating at work, like I'm not picturing guys doing it and that is weird and gross.

• 19:07Rayna Greenberg?

  But like, that's, I'm like, that's predatory. Meanwhile, like I was in my office in the middle of service, letting a waiter hike my pencil skirt up and bend me over a desk.

• 19:15Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes. So, right up, right up, let's not forget she said she gave a blowjob and made sure to tell you guys it was on camera twice.

• 19:23Rayna Greenberg?

  I mean, there was definitely security cams. Someone jerked off to that.

• 19:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 19:27Rayna Greenberg?

  That was my boyfriend. Does that make it better?

• 19:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, it's really stupid. We're in a relationship. So, yeah, we just thought this was like a funny thing and it's a headline that's been making the rounds this week. But, I mean, if, if you're like, I'm not gonna work somewhere unless you have a room I can fuck in, you might have a sex addiction. You might, yeah, you might have a, like, if you can't get through the workday without fucking. And also, like, what about a lunch break? Like, I mean, it's just, you're really horny and like, you don't need, you're fine without this.

• 19:56Rayna Greenberg?

  I can get through the day.

• 19:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 19:57Rayna Greenberg?

  And if it was, if it was my salary versus just being able to fuck whenever I wanted, I'm picking salary. I'm going salary. I do find it interesting, they talk about it in the article a little bit, this concept of like, what working from home just has done to people's sex lives in general, in terms of like, how many people meet people at work or at happy hours after work? And like, there is just a diminished ability to just meet people in the world. So you're kind of left, if you're, for single people, you are left with dating apps and that's that.

• 20:24Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, it says 29% of people felt that returning to the office might actually improve their sex life. You'd think it would be higher if people actually thought about it because meeting people on the job could offer more opportunities for intimacy or even the prospect of an office romance. I mean, we've talked about this with multiple guests, too. I mean, even Scott Galloway, how many people do meet at work or at something work-related that totally went away with the pandemic and people working from home?

• 20:46Rayna Greenberg?

  And I also think you just feel better about yourself when you like, take a shower in the morning, put on an outfit, go somewhere. Like, I just, I feel depressed when I've sat at the house all day.

• 20:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  I know.

• 20:54Rayna Greenberg?

  You and I have been talking about this all the time. Like, I will put on an outfit, walk to a restaurant to work because I'm depressed.

• 20:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's really, I mean, I would choose it, obviously. I don't want to complain. You know, I'd love having my freedom and rerun our businesses. And so I would certainly choose it over having to go to an office every day. But like, when we're home all day, like, I gotta get out.

• 21:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, I feel depressed, so.

• 21:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  And listen, you, you know, you guys do you. You guys want to fuck at work? Clearly, I support, I support fucking at work.

• 21:20Rayna Greenberg?

  I didn't plan that at all, by the way. That just came rushing back to me. I have immediate recall.

• 21:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  Of course.

• 21:26Rayna Greenberg?

  I had a lot of sex at work.

• 21:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  Best moments of your life.

• 21:28Rayna Greenberg?

  It really, I mean, nothing makes going to work better than knowing that like someone's gonna flirt with you.

• 21:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh my god, a work crush? Nothing gets you out of bed in the morning.

• 21:36Rayna Greenberg?

  No. And then my first like corporate job at Groupon, I had like a crush on one of the managers at the other office in like a different city. We would sext during meetings.

• 21:44Ashley Hesseltine?

  I was talking about this. I would be having Gchat sex.

• 21:48Rayna Greenberg?

  Yes.

• 21:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  Like I was on my Gmail, but still I was on the work desktop. Like when I was in my PR job, I was on the work desktop, had my Gmail open in the Gchat. We used to Gchat all day. I'd have like 10 tabs open chat with all my friends and with the guy I was dating at the time, like dirty time. Gchat sex.

• 22:05Rayna Greenberg?

  On the, I did too. On the company Gchat. Like my at Groupon email address.

• 22:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, that is crazy. I was at least on my personal.

• 22:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Nope, not us.

• 22:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  But I'm still on the work computer. People are still walking by and I'm just like, oh, I can't wait to feel your big hard dick inside of me.

• 22:18Rayna Greenberg?

  It's crazy.

• 22:20Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's crazy. Like, what were we doing?

• 22:22Rayna Greenberg?

  I don't know. The stuff that, so I met, I met Melanie at my job where I jerked the guy off in the coat check.

• 22:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 22:28Rayna Greenberg?

  And then I went to work with her in a corporate environment at Groupon. And she sends me emails every once in a while, the stuff that I would write. I wrote crazy things. I wrote stuff like, I'll fucking kill every person we work with. Like, I put that in a professional work email.

• 22:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  It used to be different times.

• 22:44Rayna Greenberg?

  I really, you could, you could fire me in an instant. I'm Gchat sex in the middle of a meeting.

• 22:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's so crazy. All right. Well, let's talk about our partners and we will get into it with Mandy and Weezy.

• 22:56Rayna Greenberg?

  Let's talk about work. Let's talk about building a business.

• 22:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 22:59Rayna Greenberg?

  So I think that a lot of people, when they're starting a business, they're like, how do I make myself look professional? Obviously, it's a website, but that can be very, very daunting if you've never built a website. And I remember the first time I built one and I was just like, this seems like the hardest task I could ever possibly. Deal with. So if you are thinking of doing it, I cannot recommend turning to Wix enough. They put incredible website creation at your fingertips. They have an AI site builder. So you answer a few questions and get a personalized business-ready site fast. So if you don't want to do it, just like piecemeal it to yourself, that makes it the quickest and easiest. If you prefer a template, they offer 2,000 designer-made templates that are fully customizable and come with out-of-box business functionality.

• 23:42Rayna Greenberg?

  I mean, the hardest thing when you start these platforms, so the first website I built was not on Wix. And I was just like, they're so not user-friendly a lot of the time. And it's not easy to manipulate certain things you want to move around. And Wix is the simplest I've ever seen. And if you're looking to sell products or services, schedule appointments. Wix.com has you covered with built-in solutions. There's no add-ons required. And Wix has been pioneering in website tech for almost 20 years now. I still remember I used to, they had this like workspace in New York I used to go to where they like facilitated it for creators. And I was just like, this is the best platform and it is just built to make it as easy and functional and just drag and drop as possible. And now they have all these AI image studio solutions and tons of amazing design effects.

• 24:26Rayna Greenberg?

  So if you guys are ready to create your own website, go to Wix.com. That's Wix.com to start building your website today. And thanks to Wix for supporting our show.

• 24:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, Quince, so we were talking about this trip we're taking. If you guys are going anywhere this summer, even just doing, you're going down the street. You taking a vacation across town.

• 24:44Rayna Greenberg?

  Brian Kelly said vacation around you.

• 24:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  Domestically, yeah, whatever you guys are doing, you might want to get some new clothes to be excited about. And we just love Quince so much. So they have incredible prices on things like 100% European linen shorts and dresses. They're silk. I'm obsessed with. They have luxe swimwear. You guys can check them out for swimwear. Great sandals, Italian leather sandals, bags. I'm obsessed with this like cross-body woven leather bag that I have. And everything with Quince is half the cost of similar brands. So I'm just on their site now. This yellow dress, bring a look at this. This washable stretch silk high-neck midi dress reminds me of the dress in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. So like you can just get into their silk dresses, this set. Surge by Yellow. I'm obsessed with their yellow, such like the color of the season.

• 25:28Ashley Hesseltine?

  I really love their silk. I have a bunch of the silk dresses and I have a skirt and I just throw it in the wash on gentle. I hang dry it. It's super easy. They have great shoes. They have great jewelry. We just love it so, so much. And they only work with factories that use safe, ethical and responsible manufacturing practices and premium fabrics and finishes. Everything is super, super high quality, but again, at half the price of probably what you're used to. So you guys can give your summer closet an upgrade with Quince. Go to quince.com/gge for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Q U I N C E dot com slash G G E to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash G G E. And I did have to return something recently and it was super easy and they were really great. Their customer service is responsive. Just a big fan all around.

• 26:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Yes, absolutely. All right. And if rent is your biggest expense, student loans might be your second. Now, Bilt lets you use one to help tackle the other. Earn points by paying rent and use them towards your student loan balance. Here's how. So Bilt is the rewards program for where you live. It's free to join. And by paying rent, you rack up flexible points that can be used towards some of your biggest expenses like rent, travel, student loan payments and a lot more. When you pay rent through Bilt, you unlock two powerful benefits. You earn one of the industry's most valuable points on rent, up to one times Bilt point every month, no matter where you live or who your landlord is. And second, you gain access to exclusive neighborhood benefits in your city,

• 26:52Rayna Greenberg?

  which are things like extra points on dining out, complimentary items at Bilt Partners and unique experiences that only members can access. And now Bilt announced that you can redeem these points towards your student loan balance, offering you even more flexibility with how you can use your rewards. So if you're not earning points on rent, my question is, what are you waiting for? Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of the industry's most valuable points by going to joinbilt.com slash G G E. That's J O I N B I L T dot com slash G G E. Make sure to use our URL so that they know that we sent you. Joinbilt.com slash G G E to sign up for Bilt today.

• 27:26Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, let's get into it with our guests.

• 27:28Rayna Greenberg?

  All right, guys, we are really excited to welcome back two amazing guests to the show. One of them, her successful production company, WTF Media, has grown to multiple occasions in the U.S. And around the world, you've seen Ashley record, Ashley and I record there many, many times.

• 27:42Speaker 00

  I need the money. You just started your own shit.

• 27:45Rayna Greenberg?

  Her journey in growing businesses and sexual exploration landed her a TV show Sex Cells, where you can catch her on screen and at her newest venture, Trap House, a fitness studio in NYC. You guys are doing the most. And the other guest today, she hosts Period Sis, a podcast on reproductive health, and previously secured a seven-figure deal to see the thing is, she has hosted Revolt Summit, MTV's Date My Playlist, and owns Full Court Studios in Brooklyn. Together, they host Decisions Decisions, formerly Horrible Decisions Podcast. Their tour is happening all summer long. We are so excited to feature their brand new book out now, No Holes Barred, a dual manifesto of sexual exploration and power. Please welcome to the show, Mandy and Weezy.

• 28:26Speaker 03

  Hey.

• 28:28Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm exhausted from this. My nipples are a little hard.

• 28:31Speaker 00

  Oh my God, do you need water?

• 28:32Speaker 03

  No, they're not a little hard. They are rock solid. They almost poke my eye out, actually.

• 28:36Speaker 00

  I remember the days where you were talking about getting implants on girls to eat and you would like to share your story. And I was like, oh my God, I wish I like had my surgery while I was podcasting.

• 28:46Rayna Greenberg?

  Are you, you have implants?

• 28:48Speaker 00

  They're old. They're like 13 years old.

• 28:50Speaker 03

  I'm working on actually scheduling my consultation to get mine. I want smaller, I want waist smaller, like maybe a full B or a C cup. And then I want them just high and small and tiny.

• 29:00Rayna Greenberg?

  But you'll get a reduction and an implant?

• 29:03Speaker 03

  Reduction and an implant. But because it's like, I'm a skinny bitch now. Like, these can't keep weighing me down. I need them to go. And then because I keep losing the weight, I do this thing when I'm bored where I'll pinch the skin and it stays. Like, there's so, my titties are so like, it's like skin that is just like, what's going on?

• 29:21Rayna Greenberg?

  Get done!

• 29:21Speaker 03

  Like it's dehydrated titties over here.

• 29:23Rayna Greenberg?

  We do weird shit with our, like aging. I'll be like looking at my knee. Like, what is my knee doing?

• 29:28Speaker 00

  Oh, when you said we do weird shit, I was like, oh, tell me all the weird like cosmetic stuff.

• 29:32Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, that we've had done?

• 29:33Speaker 00

  Did you like PRP? I love that shit. I'm like, tell me.

• 29:35Speaker 03

  I haven't done no goddamn, what is that?

• 29:37Speaker 00

  I do none of this stuff, by the way.

• 29:39Speaker 03

  On your face?

• 29:40Rayna Greenberg?

  I've just heard about salmon sperm. I can't, I can't do it. I can't.

• 29:43Speaker 00

  Do you remember that lady we saw that looked super young and we met her in Colorado and we're like, what do you do? She's like, PRP. And after that, I was like.

• 29:51Rayna Greenberg?

  Is that blood?

• 29:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 29:52Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, I'll do it.

• 29:53Speaker 03

  Oh, that's the, that's the Kardashian.

• 29:55Ashley Hesseltine?

  And for hair, they do it. I've done that when they did the microneedling on my face. They take your blood out.

• 30:01Speaker 00

  They say that's the best, that's it.

• 30:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally. That's child's play for me. I've had everything done.

• 30:05Speaker 00

  Ooh, what do you do, what do you do?

• 30:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, everything on my face and body is fake, except for my boobs are real. I've had two breast reductions and a reconstruction.

• 30:11Speaker 00

  Oh, reductions. That's what it is. I remember you talking about surgeries. Okay, okay, okay, okay.

• 30:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  But implants, like, they, don't they just start to look and feel better when they age?

• 30:20Speaker 03

  Girl, they were not. She just says she don't, she's scared to have to get them redone if they make her get them redone.

• 30:26Ashley Hesseltine?

  Cause they get hard.

• 30:26Speaker 00

  The best compliment is getting fucked and then like months later, they're like, what?

• 30:30Ashley Hesseltine?

  There's, that, well, yeah, your friend has some of the best I've ever seen. I'm not gonna say her by name, but. Yeah, they're great. I saw her at the pool. I was like, those are the best tits I've ever seen. And you told me they were implants. I was like, but they've like fallen. They're aging. Aging implants are great.

• 30:42Speaker 00

  You see, it's like right here. You know, when you first get the boob and you're like.

• 30:45Speaker 03

  First off, this is audio. No one's, look, y'all, she's showing her whole tits.

• 30:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, we're on YouTube. Go to YouTube. Check it out.

• 30:51Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 30:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  Head to YouTube.

• 30:52Speaker 03

  All right, girl.

• 30:52Ashley Hesseltine?

  Head to YouTube.

• 30:53Speaker 03

  Keep them monetized, Jesus Christ.

• 30:54Speaker 00

  No, I'm just saying, you know that fake tit where they're like right here?

• 30:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. Do you guys show your titties at your live shows?

• 31:00Speaker 00

  No.

• 31:01Speaker 03

  But she, she done sucked milk out of a stranger's titty at a live show.

• 31:05Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, you guys had it. We had a woman spray her breast milk at one of our shows.

• 31:08Speaker 03

  Why?

• 31:09Speaker 00

  Are we the white, black version of a joke?

• 31:10Speaker 03

  I literally said this was white people shit. I'm not just, I literally told her like, bro, you just drank somebody's breast milk that you don't know.

• 31:18Speaker 00

  And that woman was Afro American.

• 31:20Speaker 03

  I don't care what she was.

• 31:21Ashley Hesseltine?

  I did wanna try breast milk one time.

• 31:23Speaker 00

  You've never tried a friend's breast milk?

• 31:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, I'm not, I don't, I would be down. I'm gonna ask my sister-in-law this summer maybe.

• 31:28Speaker 03

  She was like, oh my God, it's hot. Duh, bitch.

• 31:31Speaker 00

  That's the thing, the degree body shot.

• 31:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  I want it refrigerated. I want it straight. I want it out of the fridge.

• 31:35Speaker 00

  On ice?

• 31:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  I want a little chill.

• 31:36Speaker 00

  No, that's not the kind you want. Like, you want it to be.

• 31:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  I don't want refrigerated. Did you?

• 31:41Speaker 00

  No, it's hot. That's the crazy.

• 31:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  On her tits, like, did she breastfeed you?

• 31:44Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 31:45Ashley Hesseltine?

  First of all. You sucked it out?

• 31:47Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 31:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  Wait, what city was this in?

• 31:49Speaker 00

  Atlanta, Georgia.

• 31:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  Ours was in New Haven, Connecticut.

• 31:52Speaker 00

  Bro.

• 31:54Rayna Greenberg?

  It couldn't get wider.

• 31:54Speaker 00

  In front of 400 people.

• 31:56Rayna Greenberg?

  The widest place in America.

• 31:57Speaker 03

  Wait, literally.

• 31:58Speaker 00

  We have a book signing in New Haven. I was like, is anyone gonna go?

• 32:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, those people are wild.

• 32:02Speaker 00

  See, I'm like.

• 32:02Speaker 03

  It's the college shit.

• 32:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  But they don't even, we were like, who here went to Yale? They were like boo. Like, I don't know who came to our show in New Haven. But they were wild. We did a talent show and this woman was like, I can squirt my titty milk out. She like splash zone the front row. We were like, this is insane.

• 32:18Speaker 00

  You know what's funny? When you think people are coming to your show because you're the sex birds and you're the girl that talks about XYZ and then someone out does it like, bitch, who the fuck do you think you are?

• 32:28Rayna Greenberg?

  I think one night only, we need to do a live show, all four of us. MSG, let's book it.

• 32:33Speaker 03

  Oh my god. She said, we're gonna skip Beacon Theater, we're gonna skip.

• 32:38Speaker 00

  But the MSG room for a podcast.

• 32:40Rayna Greenberg?

  I saw you guys are doing Town Hall. You guys have quite the tour this summer. And by the way, I do take my boobs out at every show.

• 32:45Ashley Hesseltine?

  People go crazy.

• 32:46Speaker 03

  That's why your audiences are so big. We have, you gotta show your goddamn tits.

• 32:50Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, you gotta take your boobs out.

• 32:51Speaker 00

  You know, I really am kinda interested in this idea though. Andrew Schultz said the best live shows he's ever been to were Girls Got Eaten Hours.

• 32:58Rayna Greenberg?

  Aww.

• 32:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  Clip it. Okay, I need to get the truth on this. Are you guys friends?

• 33:05Speaker 00

  No.

• 33:06Rayna Greenberg?

  Is this a bit? Yeah, like we, we're not sure. What do we know?

• 33:10Speaker 03

  No, we're not.

• 33:11Speaker 00

  But like, not in a way of like.

• 33:12Speaker 03

  We respect each other. We love this podcast. This is our baby.

• 33:15Speaker 00

  Can I define friend?

• 33:16Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 33:16Speaker 00

  Mandy and I don't hang out.

• 33:18Ashley Hesseltine?

  You don't hang out outside of it.

• 33:19Rayna Greenberg?

  Ashley and I don't really hang out.

• 33:20Speaker 00

  No, but.

• 33:22Rayna Greenberg?

  One on one. I complain to her all the time.

• 33:23Speaker 03

  It's the one on one.

• 33:24Speaker 00

  You guys wanna hang out.

• 33:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  She's lying. We have spent holidays together. That's not one on one. We are together like five days a week. So.

• 33:32Speaker 03

  Wait, why so much?

• 33:33Rayna Greenberg?

  We have a lot of the same friend groups. We just.

• 33:35Speaker 00

  Yeah. Oh, so you're friends? No.

• 33:36Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. We're actually friends. We're literally best friends. What's happening here? No, because sometimes I'm like, we have been hanging.

• 33:43Speaker 03

  What's going on?

• 33:44Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm like, we haven't hung out. And she's like, I've seen you every day this week. I'm like, not solo.

• 33:47Speaker 03

  We were doing work. That doesn't count.

• 33:49Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm not like Raina. Let's make a dinner res.

• 33:51Speaker 03

  That's what I'm saying. We don't hang out one on one.

• 33:54Speaker 00

  With Alex and I, when we started the studio, he, there were like days where we would go out and like get fucked up. And we'd be at some random, and it was during the pandemic, we made the studio. So we'd be doing those underground parties somewhere in Soho. It's like 5:00 AM. He's like, "No, but like, we need to talk about the business." "No, we don't, nigga. We just gotta hide."

• 34:11Rayna Greenberg?

  And that's your friend?

• 34:12Speaker 00

  But what, yes, but that's the hard thing about friends and business. And so where I feel like our relationship gets tough because, damn, this sounds bad, but, okay.

• 34:23Speaker 03

  I have thick skin.

• 34:24Speaker 00

  You know, when you have, it's like, there's so much love you have with a friend, so you're softer? I don't do that with Mandy, and she doesn't do it with me.

• 34:30Speaker 03

  That's interesting. I come off like a corporate bitch.

• 34:33Rayna Greenberg?

  You get the work version.

• 34:34Speaker 03

  But like, oh, like, it gets to the point sometimes.

• 34:36Speaker 00

  Why would I hold her hand while I'm saying something that could potentially be hurtful? For example, let's just say we're trying to give each other feedback on something. It's different when you're friends in business, because it's like you're dancing around it. We don't do that, which can make the arguments worse.

• 34:51Speaker 03

  And then because it's so much business, and sometimes we're not in a good place, send me an email. I don't like talking business over text message or group chats. So I move everything to email. I move everything to an Excel sheet. It's, we're business.

• 35:03Rayna Greenberg?

  So it's interesting how you guys wrote this. What? What did I say?

• 35:10Speaker 00

  So you bitches are gonna fight right now.

• 35:12Speaker 03

  You did that, bitch. That was funny.

• 35:15Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm gonna spin it. I'm gonna bring it around.

• 35:17Speaker 00

  I think our fans need this clip. So, um, shit.

• 35:24Speaker 03

  Hold on, hold on. Would you want to know the funny part about it?

• 35:26Rayna Greenberg?

  Raina didn't even know she was doing anything.

• 35:29Speaker 03

  What even makes that funnier is when people do read the book. Oh, this is why their chapters are separate.

• 35:33Rayna Greenberg?

  That's what I was gonna say. You guys wrote separate chapters.

• 35:36Speaker 03

  But we had to, though.

• 35:37Rayna Greenberg?

  You guys wrote this book, and they are separate chapters.

• 35:39Speaker 00

  We didn't share the same dick. We can't share the same story.

• 35:41Rayna Greenberg?

  I don't think that's, almost 30, another podcast, they're best friends through and through. They're like us. They did the same thing. I love the format. It like inspires the way that I think we should write a book. We can't, we're not gonna share the same voice.

• 35:53Speaker 03

  At all.

• 35:53Rayna Greenberg?

  And we talked about this a lot. So that's what I was gonna say. We're back and forth.

• 35:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 35:57Rayna Greenberg?

  We, Ashley and I really like the way you guys wrote this, because also your backgrounds of, of sex and exploration and how you feel about yourself. Families are so different. And how weird would it be to not have two distinct voices?

• 36:09Speaker 00

  I think the only thing we could have done that we toyed with in the beginning was like, Maybe someone's going back and forth in sections or like talking to each other.

• 36:17Speaker 03

  She wanted to do that so bad. I said, no.

• 36:19Speaker 00

  I did want to talk to each other in the chapters because now we're doing podcasts and there's so much commentary I could have around her chapters. And even reading them in editing, I'm like, oh, I would have loved to said something at the end or like, talk about how I feel about it. There was just like a lot of empathic moments I had while reading them that I don't have on the podcast because it's so fun and chatty. So I think it could have been cool to see that. I would have loved that.

• 36:44Speaker 03

  Next book. That's what you do for the next book.

• 36:46Speaker 00

  Not she's being a cunt today.

• 36:48Speaker 03

  I mean. You guys are being great. For me, because I dug heavily into therapy for my chapters, I had conversations, like even my abortion chapter. That writing this book made me have a conversation for the first time in 17 years with my mom about it. The girl who was working at Cold Stone and took her check literally the year her dad died to help me pay for my abortion. I had never knew how that decision that I made impacted either of them till 17 years later.

• 37:18Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 37:19Speaker 03

  So for me, where Weezy did introduce that as something she wanted to introduce, for me, there was so much that I already had to bear. The reader can take what they want, but I wanted nobody to put any chime in on how they felt about what I had dealt with with my story. For me, I didn't want it, especially because, and back to the business thing, there's not that core friendship there. To where I don't know if I would have been able to receive everything that maybe she would have said or felt like. And so for me, I was like.

• 37:47Speaker 00

  What was I supposed to say? You shouldn't have had an abortion, bitch.

• 37:49Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no. But just for me, this was already so much of my heart and, and journey being poured into this book with real like, I recorded my therapy sessions for a lot of these chapters just because I was like, oh damn, I finally have to go back and talk about my childhood. I've been in therapy for four years. It wasn't until this goddamn book started, started writing that I even dug back into that. So for me, the, the idea of someone being able to input their thoughts on what I experienced in my life and my trauma. I was just like, I don't know if I have that.

• 38:20Speaker 00

  I guess for me, the book wasn't so much trauma more than it was really fun and sexy. So I think about it in that way. Like there's some empathy, sure, that I can maybe talk about. I don't think there's much commentary for me on that, but like even the story about being electrocuted or like, uh, joining a couple, like, Mandy joins a couple on the beach that she meets and is a unicorn and then mine are all these curated threesomes, like. There's so much of a juxtaposition between the two of us that you even see on the podcast that the book makes really fun. Cause all the elements of this sexual exploration kind of have the same end goal. It's like two women figuring out where they fit. Whether it's their own sexuality, someone else's sexuality, judgment, pain, heartbreak.

• 39:04Speaker 03

  Overcoming trauma, like existing as like this liberated person. Or are you really, or is it a false sense of security? And you see a lot of that in the progression portion of the book. But yeah, I guess, I guess we both went to this book both kind of differently. I know Weezy was like, oh, sex, raunch. She wanted an erotica. And at the time of my life of us writing this book, I said, I want to bring my shame in here. I want to bring my trauma. I want to bring what I'm going through in therapy. And so we found a way to blend both of those. So yeah, you still see me at the sex dungeon.

• 39:34Speaker 00

  Like erotica with self help.

• 39:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, you guys, I want to take a moment for the book. The book is incredible. You guys blended it perfectly. And you give a trigger warning for the themes that you discuss. There is sexual assault and miscarriage and abortion. And then on top of it, it's so sexy and juicy. Like I was reading it like, I've been reading this about these like.

• 39:52Speaker 03

  That's why we made the cover to where you could be on the train, even though you're, y'all are west coast now.

• 39:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  The cover is great.

• 39:58Speaker 03

  But you could be out, it could be at the airport and it's not as alarming.

• 40:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  But it's so honest and raw and you guys wrote it in the way that you speak, which I love. It's just fun to read. Like, oh, she's talking to me. That's how it feels.

• 40:11Speaker 00

  I like, I like hearing that too. And it's funny you said, should I be reading this? Because a really close friend of mine read it and she goes, oh my God, I have to talk. I don't know.

• 40:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  About the period pussy stuff.

• 40:21Speaker 03

  Ah, oh, now you call the hell out.

• 40:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, but I'm saying if you're best.

• 40:26Speaker 03

  Trigger warning for the audience.

• 40:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, no, it was a beautiful chapter about love.

• 40:30Speaker 03

  Thank you. That's what she keeps.

• 40:32Speaker 00

  It was the one where I ate come out of my ex girlfriend's pussy when we had a threesome. She was like, this is too far.

• 40:36Ashley Hesseltine?

  That was too much, but your chapter about love was beautiful.

• 40:44Speaker 03

  She said that with serious face, sir. Yeah, bitch, that was too much.

• 40:47Rayna Greenberg?

  We don't have a lot of lines. For your friend. It was over the line. Did your parents read this? Not for, not for me.

• 40:52Speaker 00

  No, my mom opened six pages. She was like, I don't, I'm okay.

• 40:55Rayna Greenberg?

  Do you want them to read it?

• 40:57Speaker 03

  My mom, for the chapters that I mentioned her, I let her know what it was about. I told her she was a dumb bitch with my daddy. I told her, like.

• 41:05Rayna Greenberg?

  You were really raw about it.

• 41:06Speaker 03

  I was, I, oh, yeah. Uh, not sure what they'll think about it. They, like, the stories that I, that I told, it's real.

• 41:13Rayna Greenberg?

  I always say, like, I think some family members of mine need to die before I write a book.

• 41:17Speaker 03

  Yeah, they do.

• 41:18Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, shit. I mean, I, it's really. The fucked up ones, you gotta give.

• 41:22Speaker 03

  Oh, no, well, the ones that are alive are dead to me, so.

• 41:25Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, but you guys were both very honest about your parents and the situations that they put you in. And I thought you were really respectful. I mean, that's your journey, that's your truth, but it's not easy for anybody, I don't think. Like, I always thought, like, if Ashley wrote a book, like, I wonder, like, what you would write about me and how you would write it.

• 41:40Speaker 03

  She's like, who said you'd be?

• 41:42Rayna Greenberg?

  I would know, I'd be excited to read it.

• 41:43Speaker 00

  Can you imagine, like, Rita reads it, she's like, oh, I have no idea.

• 41:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Do you ever think about?

• 41:48Speaker 00

  I'm like, I hate this.

• 41:48Rayna Greenberg?

  Do you ever think about that? I think all the time, you and I read a book about each other, like, what would you write? What would your experience be around, like, reading it? And I don't know, it's just hard to, like, read about yourself.

• 41:57Speaker 00

  It, it is hard to read about yourself because when we were doing the audiobook and I was reading things back.

• 42:02Rayna Greenberg?

  That's fun.

• 42:03Speaker 00

  I was like, holy shit. The thing that was most interesting to me about reading it back and other people reading it is like, oh, you're still in love with your ex-girlfriend, was the response that I was getting. Even when my boyfriend read the chapter where I was, like, apologizing to her, like, and at the end of that chapter, I'm like, I'm talking to you, right?

• 42:21Rayna Greenberg?

  That was powerful.

• 42:22Speaker 00

  Thank you, it felt good to write.

• 42:24Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 42:24Speaker 00

  I didn't realize I was kind of a fuck boy to my ex-girlfriend because I was like, yeah, I want marriage and family too, but just pushing it to the side and not being intentional. And I talk about her so well, where a lot of this book comes from like pain or overcoming things, because horrible decisions that. Let me tell you about this decision. Oh, my God, there was this person, there was this guy, whatever. She's so celebrated that I think everybody was very confused. Like, well, do you still want her? And what I really took from that was like, damn, every ex isn't bad.

• 42:58Rayna Greenberg?

  Totally.

• 42:58Speaker 00

  Why don't we celebrate the good ones? Like, I'm not gonna lie to you, my boyfriend is not my first great guy.

• 43:03Rayna Greenberg?

  Mm-hmm.

• 43:04Speaker 00

  I'm flat out, I'm not as far as bad bitch. Like, I don't think that we are doing enough celebration of past experiences.

• 43:13Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, that molded us.

• 43:14Speaker 00

  Yeah, like, everything is a woman going on a date, talking about how terrible men have treated her.

• 43:19Rayna Greenberg?

  Mm-hmm.

• 43:20Speaker 00

  What the fuck? So now you're gonna accept anything because you're just so happy to have a decent guy? No, like, I am like, oh, I had this, I had that, we didn't work out, but like, amazing, supported. I really love doing that for her specifically.

• 43:34Rayna Greenberg?

  And also, that doesn't mean that you're still in love with the person, you have feelings for them anymore. I have to speak pretty highly about a lot of my exes.

• 43:40Speaker 00

  It's a good sign.

• 43:41Rayna Greenberg?

  I think that's a good thing. The people I'm with have treated me well. I haven't really been cheated on that much, or like, all that.

• 43:46Speaker 00

  That much is crazy.

• 43:47Rayna Greenberg?

  I have one boyfriend, I have one person I love that cheat on me a lot, but like, I haven't had these-

• 43:51Speaker 00

  That you found out about.

• 43:51Rayna Greenberg?

  That I found out about. I, listen, I like to think that I kept it tight and right, okay?

• 43:55Speaker 00

  I believe you.

• 43:56Rayna Greenberg?

  But I don't wanna, I don't wanna be with those fucking people. I just, I think positively of them. I chose them. I should think positively of them.

• 44:03Speaker 00

  That's it.

• 44:03Rayna Greenberg?

  Right.

• 44:03Speaker 00

  The more that we start to like, make everyone seem bad, friends too. Oh, this person, that one, it's like, do you know how to pick them? So I try to watch how I talk about those before, because it is a little bit of reflection of you. My ex in this book, when I talk about the cheating, how many times could I have laughed? Like, a lot. And so, we can only hear so many times, like, woe is me, before we need to know that we are accountable for a lot of the things that happen to us sometimes. Not, obviously, the childhood trauma and some of the assaults and the violent stuff in this book, but I think when it comes to bad relationships, every woman in this room can be like-

• 44:44Speaker 03

  All right, I could have done XYZ to leave quicker. But we have so much hope. Like, we're such lovers, we're such loyalists sometimes as women that it really makes you jaded from the reality of having someone good. I have a friend right now who's dating someone who's shitty. She literally called me and said, dude, I think I'm just gonna stay with him because I'm thirty seven and he's not that bad.

• 45:06Ashley Hesseltine?

  But does she want kids?

• 45:07Speaker 03

  She does. She's like, what am I gonna do? Meet someone, explore them for a year.

• 45:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, but like, there's nothing worse. We see it all the time, women who are like in their thirties, mid thirties, late thirties that want kids. And if that guy is not a hundred percent in both feet in the door, he's gonna break up with you and then you have to start from scratch at, it's just, it's heartbreaking.

• 45:27Speaker 03

  Yes and no. I mean, I know there's a story of Ebony K, but I have three friends now that have eggs frozen, uh, two going through IVF. And so I, I have women right now in my life that are genuinely at a place where they're financially secure and they're like, well, it would be nice to find someone, but if I don't, I can still be a mother without a guy.

• 45:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, totally. I just don't like waiting on this guy and then he breaks up with you anyway.

• 45:52Speaker 00

  I don't think a lot of women are willing to do that. That to me is like the stronger person, not calling it a week.

• 45:56Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, you could find a guy and still end up as a single mom.

• 45:59Speaker 00

  But no, my point is. It is very powerful to make the choice to do it alone. I don't think enough people have that oomph to.

• 46:06Speaker 03

  Well, then they get the choice to do it with someone and still end up doing it.

• 46:10Speaker 00

  They think it's easier.

• 46:11Speaker 03

  A lot of them do it alone.

• 46:12Speaker 00

  Yeah. Bad relationships can be easy.

• 46:15Speaker 03

  Well, relationships aren't the same as co-parenting. So to me, like, if we're bringing up the, like, the, the element of having this guy in partnership, I think there are a lot of women that, okay, well, if I can keep my own peace and still enjoy motherhood, I'm gonna do that because a lot of women end up doing motherhood alone.

• 46:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  Doing it all anyways.

• 46:34Speaker 03

  All of my, and again, this isn't from like, uh, like, we can talk from a, the world being a great place and what we all would like it to look like. All of my friends are single mothers, all of them.

• 46:44Ashley Hesseltine?

  Wow.

• 46:44Speaker 03

  And half of them don't have any support from the fathers, no financial support, daddy don't show up. So I was raised in a single parent household and, and I guess you see that in the. Book, I talk about my viewpoints on not seeing healthy relationships growing up. On the opposite side, she grew up with married parents. So I think that that's why this book also couldn't have been written.

• 47:02Speaker 00

  Married happy because we know a lot of married and.

• 47:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, we have such different viewpoints on what relationships look like, what, what dynamics we want in our own relationships. And a lot of it has to do with how we were raised, how we grew up. Like I grew up not with not so money. She grew up with money. I grew up with two sisters. She grew up as a single child. I grew up with a white mom. She grew up with a black mom. Like there's all these different elements that help shaped who we are right now, not only in business and in friendship and in romantic partnership. That that comes through.

• 47:33Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. Okay. We're just going to take a quick break and then we will get back into it. I'm telling you guys about Nutriful. I take Nutriful every single day. I take the women's formula and this is really what I take for my hair. So I had a period of time where I noticed so much shedding and changes in my hair. And it was really upsetting to see your hair change and your, you know, your looks change. And I really turned to Nutriful and I just have seen such positive results with it. And I take my four capsules a day. Again, the women's formula, they have a women's vegan formula, women's balance formula for women 45 plus. And then they have a postpartum formula. And you guys may have heard about Nutriful's hair growth supplements and wondered, do they actually work? Which is a fair question. I mean, I can speak to it and I have so many friends that take it too.

• 48:15Ashley Hesseltine?

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• 49:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  Find out why Nutriful is the best selling hair growth supplement brand at nutrafol.com. N U T R A F O L dot com promo code G G E ten. That is Nutraful dot com promo code G G E ten.

• 49:11Rayna Greenberg?

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• 49:56Rayna Greenberg?

  truly. So go ahead and type in anything, try to stump them, but dairy free, high protein, gluten free, all the things. And planning meals and cooking can be really simple and stress free through them. So, once you talk about your goals, they're going to recommend all kinds of stuff for you. And there's no high fructose corn syrup in anything, or artificial sweeteners, or preservatives in any of Hungry Root's food, which I absolutely love. And then they give you recipes that you can cook with the ingredients that they send you. And a lot of them can be made in 15 minutes or less. So, tons of variety. They have over 15,000 recipes shipped each week. There's so much on there to choose from. And we love Hungry Root. Take advantage of this exclusive offer. For a limited time, get 40% off your first box, plus get a free item in every box for life.

• 50:39Rayna Greenberg?

  Go to HungryRoot.com slash G G E and use the code G G E. That's HungryRoot.com slash G G E. Code G G E to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life. HungryRoot.com slash G G E. Code G G E.

• 50:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, and I am telling you guys about Simply Pop. We are so excited. Simply has launched a new prebiotic soda, Simply Pop, the new juicy soda. There are five flavors, pineapple mango, lime, strawberry, citrus punch, and fruit punch. We love this. I mean, I, obviously, like, who doesn't want something that's going to be prebiotic? That's gonna taste great, made with real fruit juice. Simply Pop supports gut health, so big on gut health with six grams of prebiotic fiber, no added sugars, sweetened with juices, monk fruit extract, supports immune health with zinc and vitamin C. Simply Pop is flavor that pops. I really love all the flavors, but I'm just like a pineapple mango kind of tropical flavor. I also love a lime, any citrus fruit I love, but they all are really delicious.

• 51:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  Again, made with real fruit juice and you pair that with the zinc and the vitamin C and it's going to support your immune health. You just really can't beat it. So this is all new. You guys might be hearing about it for the first time here today. And we really encourage you guys to check it out. You can go to cokeurl.com/simplypop and find out where you can try Simply Pop.

• 51:59Rayna Greenberg?

  I love that you both have such different experiences and backgrounds, but you're both like the most open sexually people. Like you're happy to just be like raunchy and crazy. We are too. We're proud of it.

• 52:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  You're, it started a chapter that reminded me so much of you where you were just like, I was a horny kid and I don't know what else to say.

• 52:15Rayna Greenberg?

  I started reading that chapter.

• 52:16Speaker 03

  It's my favorite sentence in the book.

• 52:18Ashley Hesseltine?

  I was like, this is Raina. And you were like, I don't know what to tell you. I was just humping stuff early on and my parents were married and like.

• 52:25Rayna Greenberg?

  And nothing bad happened to me. I just was really horny as a young kid.

• 52:28Speaker 03

  Oh, my uncle didn't fuck me. I just.

• 52:31Rayna Greenberg?

  Because you know.

• 52:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  You said I didn't have a weird family members fucked me or something.

• 52:34Speaker 03

  Well, because that's the thing, as hypersexual adults, they assume, oh, that woman was assaulted and now is hypersexual.

• 52:40Speaker 00

  I actually saw a comment, we had a very deep conversation about the assault portions of the book on a podcast yesterday that was live. And someone said, can we all like take time to, you know, feel sorry for these women, but also say, does hypersexuality, doesn't it always come from someone who's been assaulted?

• 52:58Rayna Greenberg?

  Somebody said that to you?

• 52:59Speaker 00

  No, no, in the chat, like, and they weren't being unkind. I get it. They're like, hey, when you see someone that's like super crazy sexual, haven't they had some trauma? And that was exactly why I put in the book. I did have an assault happen when I was 19, 20. I wanted to fuck at seven, so.

• 53:16Rayna Greenberg?

  I didn't really know that people had that mindset. That's a thing. That's a thing.

• 53:21Speaker 03

  It's either you got assaulted or you have daddy issues.

• 53:23Rayna Greenberg?

  People wonder why somebody so young would have like an entree into the sex world like that. And like, I don't know if I was seven, but I definitely had puberty at like 10 or 11.

• 53:32Speaker 03

  Oh, by seven, I was using the shower head.

• 53:33Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, you were?

• 53:34Speaker 03

  I talk about like hunching my friends and I talk about humping a teddy bear that I got from my grandma for Christmas. Like even in terms of just my pussy throbbing at a young age and ooh, why does it feel like that? Like that my whole first chapter is about masturbation and trying to figure out what my body is doing. It feels good, but finding out how to pleasure myself and not having to need it from someone else was the whole thing.

• 53:57Speaker 00

  What's crazy too is like our fans that haven't really experienced orgasm, we find that they masturbate so much later in life.

• 54:03Rayna Greenberg?

  Yep. Oh, that's so interesting that they don't discover it. I just, I grew up in a household where sex was, there was really positive attitudes about it. My mom bought me a book about my body and puberty when I was super young. Like sex was healthy, it was positive. I'm Jewish, that really is like sex has a positive notion in Judaism.

• 54:19Speaker 03

  I did not know that.

• 54:20Rayna Greenberg?

  It's not like shame and fear and guilt around sex.

• 54:22Speaker 00

  You have to think too, so my dad is Israeli and I think it is, you know, when you, maybe if anyone's ever had this experience. My first time going to Barcelona, I was a teenager and I went to the nude beach and I was like, what the fuck? Like nothing is weird. Here in the States, nude beaches kind of are associated with sex a little bit. Adult play.

• 54:45Speaker 03

  Or old, old, old people.

• 54:47Speaker 00

  Or it's not, it's never kids. I saw families at the nude beach and I remember thinking, this is crazy. But then I realized there's really not a lot of weird feelings about sex nudity or comfortability around it. When you get out of, out of America, at least European standards. And so in the Middle East, I think if there wasn't too much oppression where you live and you've got some kind of, you know, way to move around, you see that. We don't see it at all.

• 55:18Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, you see it a lot more.

• 55:19Speaker 00

  We're like landlocked in this world of, oh my God, it's Bible belt, it's church.

• 55:25Rayna Greenberg?

  Can't show a nipple.

• 55:26Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 55:26Rayna Greenberg?

  It's the same with drinking. Like it's just this like culturally, it's not the same.

• 55:30Speaker 00

  Oh yeah, they started drinking at 16 everywhere.

• 55:32Rayna Greenberg?

  Exactly. And then they don't have the addictions that we have as prevalent as we do here because it's so forbidden and.

• 55:37Ashley Hesseltine?

  But we have like some topics we really need to discuss with you guys.

• 55:39Speaker 03

  Let's get to it.

• 55:40Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, so we have been really wanting to talk about on the podcast, the concept of, I mean, I guess you can call it cuckling, but just like hearing about somebody's other sexual experiences during intimacy or watching them or just all of it. And we just haven't really discussed it in too much depth. And it's something that you're very much discussing in the book and same and threesomes and all the things.

• 56:02Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I don't, I don't think I lean into what I've shared so much on the pod with it. But like, pretty much all of like my lovers over the last, I would say, decade, outside of my, my boyfriends, like my actual relationships, my situationships, absolutely love to get videos of me sucking and fucking other guys and have requested to be FaceTimed while I'm with other men. Or it gets deeper. If there's no video, they want to know how good it was. Well, was it big? How did he fuck you? Like, so a lot of the guys that I, I had dealt with get open sexually, but they are, majority of all of them want that.

• 56:42Ashley Hesseltine?

  You're not offering it. This is organically, they're, they're requesting it off the menu.

• 56:46Speaker 03

  And then the same, like, okay, if I can't see you, like, like, say a guy is on the road. And I was like, ooh, you're in Arizona. Are you gonna get some pussy? Can you send me pictures? I do the same thing.

• 56:55Ashley Hesseltine?

  You like it too.

• 56:56Speaker 03

  I like it too. So it's like.

• 56:57Speaker 00

  I like the change of stories because we normally only share sex stories from a love with a partner. I gotta tell you who this person was. Maybe we're just, you know, sharing deep secrets. Nothing's pleasure based because we're so used to jealousy. So for example, it actually happened last week. And again, I'm the girl that's dating other women with my boyfriend. He's telling me about a girl that he almost fucked on the way to a flight. He was like, oh, my God, I remember I was missing my flight. She was so hot. And he's telling me this whole thing.

• 57:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  This is how long ago?

• 57:30Speaker 00

  Oh, oh, the story that he's saying?

• 57:31Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes.

• 57:32Speaker 00

  Old story.

• 57:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 57:34Speaker 00

  And he said.

• 57:34Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, it didn't just happen. Okay.

• 57:35Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. But this moment just happened with us. And he was like, and then I literally thought about flying back. I was sitting in my bed figuring out, how do I get to this pussy? And I'm laughing at it, slightly getting jealous. And I'm like, so then what happened? He's like, oh, like, I went back, missed the flight. There was some hot girl in South Africa. He was like, she was a waitress. I was like, bitch, you gotta get off tonight. He's like, and I stayed there for 12 hours. And we had this crazy sex experience. He didn't say crazy. He said amazing.

• 58:02Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh.

• 58:03Speaker 00

  And I was like, what do you mean it was amazing? So then he starts laughing at me and he's like, damn, I thought I was sharing how to save space.

• 58:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 58:11Speaker 00

  And I was like, you do, you do, you do. But I'm enjoying it, feeling jealous at the same time. And I realized in that moment, we don't really talk about how good other partners were in front of each other.

• 58:24Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, not everybody wants that. And sometimes you might think you want it, and then you're like, wait, I'm getting kind of jealous. Wait, you think there's a line? You like want to hear the details and then it's like, don't tell me it was amazing?

• 58:33Speaker 00

  So I think this is all tied into the thing that Mandy and Raina are talking about, which I do as well. But for the most part, normal monogamous, maybe vanilla couples never even talk about that. They never even talk about past people in that way.

• 58:47Ashley Hesseltine?

  I mean, if you're telling me about a previous partner, it better be that I'm so much better than them. I mean, I would get really jealous.

• 58:54Speaker 00

  For the ego, but.

• 58:55Ashley Hesseltine?

  I would get really jealous.

• 58:56Speaker 03

  I don't lie. Don't ask me. I'll let you know if you're top three, top five.

• 58:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  But you're honest about that. But I just, I want to talk about this with you guys because I think that it is not, I don't want to say norm. I think people listening are like, I could never, you know, like, and that's fine. I'm not claiming to be this type of person in my relationship either, but like, do you feel like you really understand where that comes from? Did someone bring it out in you? Like, we just are interested in like the psychology of it all and kind of reframing the way that people think about this. Because our nature is like, I don't want to know about that.

• 59:28Speaker 00

  Jealousy is hot.

• 59:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 59:29Speaker 00

  This is a subcategory. Well, that chapter, why not cheat together and jealousy can be sexy? It is all, to me, a subcategory of submission.

• 59:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 59:39Speaker 00

  Because to me, the jealousy is slightly humiliation. So when my partner and I are away, he may sleep with someone. I'd say maybe once every other month, he may fuck someone else, right?

• 59:50Ashley Hesseltine?

  So you guys separately can fuck other people. It's not always just bringing someone else in.

• 59:53Speaker 00

  We just spend too much time together. He doesn't have a chance.

• 59:54Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 59:56Speaker 00

  But yeah, like if I'm gone for 10 days, I'm like, he might get some pussy.

• 59:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, got it. Okay.

• 59:59Speaker 00

  So we shared an intimate moment where I surprised him by saying, during sex, how was it? And he laughs because he doesn't want to answer, but his first response was, nothing like you. Now, sure, thanks, babe.

• 1:00:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, I like that line. That's how I'd be like, oh my God, tell me more.

• 1:00:18Speaker 00

  But I really wanted to feel jealous.

• 1:00:21Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh.

• 1:00:22Speaker 00

  I was like, tell me.

• 1:00:23Rayna Greenberg?

  Okay.

• 1:00:24Speaker 00

  And then he starts getting into these nastier, dirtier details. And it feels amazing to hear because it feels taboo, but also you're fucking me, you're mine.

• 1:00:32Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:33Speaker 00

  I think that part of it is humiliation.

• 1:00:36Rayna Greenberg?

  That's what it is. So I, I had this happen to me recently. It can also be a bunch of different things, but I had to have new recently that a guy that I was with wanted me to during sex, tell him about somebody else that I'd slept with a couple of days prior. And I was like, sure, why not? I'm here. We'll tell, let's talk. So I'm like telling him the story about how I met this guy and he wanted to know.

• 1:00:53Speaker 00

  Wait, wait, wait. While you're fucking?

• 1:00:54Rayna Greenberg?

  While we're fucking. He wanted to hear about me fucking another person like a couple of days prior. And I was like, you got it. But luckily you had. I, oh, I had.

• 1:01:03Speaker 03

  That's how, to me, I, I view it so differently. Like your question was like, why do people maybe not see this as something normal? And I think it's the delusion of how people attach love to sex.

• 1:01:14Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:15Speaker 03

  So for me, I've actually had partners feel like I don't care as much because I don't exhibit jealousy.

• 1:01:21Rayna Greenberg?

  Interesting.

• 1:01:21Speaker 03

  Especially with sex. Like I remember having someone come join me and my ex. And we had her sleep on the floor. We played the little dom role. And the next morning I had work to do. And, uh, she was like, hey, can we fuck? Yeah, I'm, I'm not in the mood to fuck. Go fuck him. Like, and so for me, there was never an element, like when we would go to the sex club, once we realized like, sometimes we don't have the same type. Well, if I want to be with a woman tonight, I'm not going to force you to fuck someone that you're not attracted to. Go find your own and I'll meet you at the end of the night. But I think it's also the relationship that I have with casual sex. Um, that allows me to just be like, I can talk about someone having sex with someone the same way. I'd be like, so how was that concert last night?

• 1:02:03Speaker 03

  I didn't go, but it's something that you enjoy. I know sex is something you could have fun with. I don't attach the love, the intimacy, the feelings that I think a lot of people attach to, to sex. So the jealousy feeling, the, the reason why some people may not feel comfortable talking about it is because so many people attribute to you having sex with someone else. Now maybe you're thinking about them. Oh, you love them. Oh, it's something that.

• 1:02:24Speaker 00

  But we also know, and by we, I mean general public that maybe thinks this is terrible. I feel like people also know love doesn't.

• 1:02:32Speaker 03

  In equal sex because if you ask a woman, if you got cheated on, could you handle it? Maybe if it was a trip to Vegas and he was drunk or XYZ like people do kind of understand that. But maybe they don't want it for themselves because it takes so much security like. I think talking through what those feelings are like is the scariest part.

• 1:02:53Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, depends on who the primary partner is, right? The person I'm talking about, I wasn't in a serious relationship with. So like I understand what you're saying, which is that like jealousy can be a way to communicate. I care about you. I feel like uncomfortable when you're with another person. And if the primary partner, the person I was with previously, I don't care about him that much. So I'm fine to sleep with other people. I think for him, he liked that like someone else wants his toy. That his toy is hot. Other people want to play with her, but like that's not somebody I'm in love with.

• 1:03:19Speaker 03

  But is that why you can play it out?

• 1:03:22Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, that's why I'm being questioned for Mandy.

• 1:03:23Rayna Greenberg?

  That's why I can play it out in that scenario.

• 1:03:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  If you're in love with somebody, is it still the same?

• 1:03:28Speaker 03

  I was in love with my ex and he cheated on me. I wasn't mad that he was fucking other bitches towards the end of our relationship, especially when we were touring. Because he would make me feel like bad for being tired and not cooking anymore or always being gone. And so it's like, okay, do you want to bitch while I'm gone? Like I, I was never even jealous or upset that he fucked other bitches. I was mad that you lied about it and now two bitches is calling my phone, questioning my goddamn. Literally I had two women come to me, woman to woman about a guy that I was with for three years. One was with him for like three months, the other six months, and they were in love with him. And had the nerve to come and check or question what my relationship really was with this man. Because which you hear in the book and it's me having a full circle moment.

• 1:04:10Speaker 03

  I talk about do married men really treat you better and how I used to be a side chick, right? And how I thought that I had a bigger bond with these men because they were honest with me. And they lied to their wives. They were honest with me. That means we had a closer relationship. Dummy. So then one of the girls literally comes to me and is like, well, I knew about everybody. He was open with me. I knew about you. I knew about the other girl. I knew even the other girl that hit my phone. So she was like, well, he was honest with me. He was lying to you. So I think our connection was had to be a little stronger. Maybe he felt safer with me and I was like.

• 1:04:44Rayna Greenberg?

  He didn't, he didn't have to lie to you because he doesn't care about you.

• 1:04:48Speaker 03

  And do you want to know like how goofy I thought she was? I ordered us shots at the end. We did a shot and I was like, alright, well, we both got by a fuck nigga.

• 1:04:57Rayna Greenberg?

  I learned something today.

• 1:04:58Speaker 03

  No, literally, I was.

• 1:04:59Rayna Greenberg?

  Thank you.

• 1:05:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, I was like, okay, here we go. But for me, it was never that I felt anyway that he had sex with someone else. Because I detached. There was women in the sex club, they'd come up and give me a hug, hey, nice to meet you. Bitch, you don't remember I ate your pussy last week? Wouldn't remember that. So like, I have this detachment with sex that I believe other people do too.

• 1:05:22Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, but you wanted somebody to be honest with you.

• 1:05:23Speaker 03

  Just be honest. Oh, I'm letting you fuck other women with me, without me. We done fucked half my friends on game nights. Why do you, why can't you be honest?

• 1:05:31Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, do you think people are too afraid to open up that Pandora's box, kind of? Because they're like, if I let you do a thing, then you start lying to me about doing other things.

• 1:05:39Speaker 03

  The fact that they lied, all my homeboys would be like, that motherfucker was stupid. He had everything, still felt like he had to lie.

• 1:05:46Speaker 00

  You know what, though? This is the thing. So someone asked us, like, lessons taught? And I was like, I think the number one thing I tried to teach is that open relationships are really hard. Like, how much communication there is? We've had so much discussion recently about Neo on our podcast, because he has four girlfriends.

• 1:06:06Rayna Greenberg?

  I meant to talk about some of that.

• 1:06:08Speaker 00

  And so, Mandy was saying to me, well, like, how can you be someone that's non-monogamous and not celebrate this? And think this is weird? And I'm like, because I just don't believe it. I really believe when people are truly non-monogamous, they have the language, we've seen it for years. I don't think just someone that, and this is not Neo, I don't know him. I think what's happening now is open relationships are so talked about. Someone that cheats a lot or likes to fuck a lot. I'm polyamorous. Are you?

• 1:06:37Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, those are very different things to me. Somebody that enjoys cheating and enjoys getting away with something.

• 1:06:42Speaker 00

  Or just knows how to lie. Just because you like to fuck a lot of people doesn't mean that you're right for this relationship.

• 1:06:47Rayna Greenberg?

  Totally.

• 1:06:47Speaker 00

  And I think I have seen it go in such bad ways, where I've had really good times with it. I mean, especially my ex-girlfriend and I, like, we talk about that, calling each other, oh my God, tell me about last night. If we slept with someone else. So I know how to do this well. I know what's effective. I know where I fucked up. And you need to meet someone in that same place, right? Someone that's open, honest, someone that can do that. It's tough because sometimes you're almost trying to teach an old dog new tricks. A lot of these men have been fucking and lying for years. They don't know what to do when they meet a woman that's like,

• 1:07:22Rayna Greenberg?

  You can do this, but just be honest.

• 1:07:24Speaker 00

  And you know why they don't know what to do?

• 1:07:25Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:26Speaker 00

  We give fake, safe spaces. Oh, yeah, tell me. Tell me. No, I want to know. I'm not going to say anything. And it's like, then you hold it against someone. Friends do this too. Giving a safe space and then maybe you share a secret. What happens generally when people are feeling safe spaces in these scenarios? I think women say it's okay and then they bring it up later and hold it against you. So we kind of, not saying you did it.

• 1:07:49Speaker 03

  Oh, I didn't.

• 1:07:50Speaker 00

  No, no, no. I'm saying I think this is why men are very scared to lie.

• 1:07:54Rayna Greenberg?

  Open relationships and cheating are so different. Like, that's not the same thing. You were being lied to. He was pursuing relationships with other people.

• 1:08:00Speaker 03

  There were times where he wanted me to be honest and I was like, you really want me to be honest? Okay, because we broke up like 13 times. And sorry, I didn't cry every time he broke up with me. I went to my rolodicks and got somebody that ain't going nowhere. We all got that too. We all have guys from the past that, once a relationship ends, okay, let me see what he got. As long as he ain't got a girlfriend, and maybe even if he got a girlfriend, I'm still going to see if I can hit. So there was one guy that is lit. He's very lit, very well off. And so my ex would ask, oh, who did you go see? This person. And he became the person towards the last, the last five breakups. Yep, saw him again, saw him again. Uh huh. And now we have to watch him on TV? You're bad.

• 1:08:45Speaker 03

  Like, now you know.

• 1:08:46Rayna Greenberg?

  I love that.

• 1:08:46Speaker 03

  Now you know, sorry, but this is him and so.

• 1:08:49Speaker 00

  You're making me think I just called someone. He's a film director that I slept with, but we've been sleeping with each other on and off for a few years. When you said you can call anytime, I called him to recommend him to someone. He answered the phone like, I knew you missed me. I was like, what?

• 1:09:03Rayna Greenberg?

  That is so funny. Like, this is a work call. That's the opposite.

• 1:09:05Speaker 00

  I am so sorry. This is my friend Michelle.

• 1:09:08Rayna Greenberg?

  Trying to pawn you off?

• 1:09:09Speaker 00

  Bro, but I realized we were that person for each other for a long time. And there's always going to be someone. Always.

• 1:09:19Speaker 03

  Every woman has somebody. That y'all's audience is sitting right now like, yep, John, Kevin, Joe, like.

• 1:09:27Rayna Greenberg?

  Not all the white names.

• 1:09:28Speaker 03

  Oh, of course.

• 1:09:29Speaker 00

  What's our pod?

• 1:09:30Rayna Greenberg?

  Tyler.

• 1:09:30Speaker 03

  Jamal.

• 1:09:32Speaker 00

  Wait.

• 1:09:32Speaker 03

  We're not doing that.

• 1:09:35Speaker 00

  Darius.

• 1:09:36Speaker 03

  You know.

• 1:09:36Speaker 00

  You fucked a Darius before?

• 1:09:38Speaker 03

  I actually had a crush on a guy named Darius growing up to where I made his name my password for my space.

• 1:09:44Speaker 00

  Damn.

• 1:09:45Speaker 03

  Darius O one.

• 1:09:46Ashley Hesseltine?

  That is so funny.

• 1:09:47Speaker 03

  I know, I literally.

• 1:09:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  So I wonder if anyone else has that story.

• 1:09:51Speaker 03

  I.

• 1:09:52Speaker 00

  Have you fucked a Trey? I fucked a Trey. I'm trying to think of.

• 1:09:56Speaker 03

  Damn, why the hell?

• 1:09:57Ashley Hesseltine?

  Do you keep a list of how many people you slept with?

• 1:09:58Speaker 03

  It's so funny. She tried to keep a list and she tried to go through it and I said, oh bitch, you forgot this name. You forgot this name. I started remembering, nigga. She fucked. She said, oh my God, I did.

• 1:10:06Speaker 00

  Oh, this is one of my favorite stories. So the story about the first pussy I ever ate was a girl.

• 1:10:12Ashley Hesseltine?

  Love that story.

• 1:10:13Speaker 00

  I love that story too.

• 1:10:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:15Speaker 00

  So she takes me to this guy's house that she's sleeping with. This story is told in 2007, maybe? No, no, 2009, sorry.

• 1:10:23Speaker 03

  I was about to say, not, not us talking about.

• 1:10:25Speaker 00

  Underage, no, no, no, no. I was a year after high school, so maybe I was 19. I couldn't get in the club.

• 1:10:30Ashley Hesseltine?

  19, the craziest stuff happened.

• 1:10:32Speaker 00

  Oh, 19 is awful.

• 1:10:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  19 was wild.

• 1:10:34Rayna Greenberg?

  It's a wild time. First pussy I ever ate too.

• 1:10:35Speaker 00

  Oh my God. Pussy twins. So 2009, I was 19 and this girl brings me to this guy's house and we did a threesome. So honestly, we came after the club 3am and we left after the sex. Years later, she and I are talking. She's holding her baby. And I'm like, oh my God, girl, I gotta redo this list from back in the day. She says, add Q on there. I'm like, who the fuck is Q? She's like, my baby daddy. I'm like, I didn't fuck him. And I'm taking real offense to this, thinking she thinks I fucked her man on her back. She's like, yes, you did with me.

• 1:11:12Ashley Hesseltine?

  That night?

• 1:11:12Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:11:13Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:11:14Speaker 00

  He had dry ass, now he don't. I don't know that was him. So I'm like, you're kidding me. That was not Q. So she's like.

• 1:11:20Ashley Hesseltine?

  Stop it.

• 1:11:21Speaker 00

  Bro, holding the baby. Babe, tell me how Weezy didn't know.

• 1:11:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  But they.

• 1:11:28Speaker 00

  Bro, they were just fuck buddies back then.

• 1:11:30Speaker 03

  And they

• 1:11:31Speaker 00

  He's dying laughing. He's like, yo, he's like, I had a feeling you didn't know it was me. He's like, cause the last time I saw you, you were just super chill. And I'm like, damn.

• 1:11:38Speaker 03

  Oh yeah. I remembered a whole body from Miami underage. I had to sit at the end of the bed because

• 1:11:43Speaker 00

  I forgot.

• 1:11:44Speaker 03

  We were scared. It was a guy from the club.

• 1:11:45Rayna Greenberg?

  You were there?

• 1:11:46Speaker 03

  Uh, I sat at the end of the bed.

• 1:11:47Rayna Greenberg?

  You were in the room?

• 1:11:48Speaker 00

  I was scared he was gonna kill me.

• 1:11:49Speaker 03

  I was in the room. Bro, we were underage in the club. Sorry to that guy.

• 1:11:54Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh my god.

• 1:11:55Speaker 03

  But we had fake IDs. So we meet these guys in the club. We go back to the hotel room and she's like, well, you can't leave me. And I said, but she was like, you can't watch. So I just sat at the end of the bed while they fuck.

• 1:12:05Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah. It wasn't sexual. You were just there for like

• 1:12:06Speaker 03

  Oh, I was

• 1:12:07Speaker 00

  I was terrified.

• 1:12:08Rayna Greenberg?

  This happened to me once.

• 1:12:09Speaker 03

  I was there for safety. She didn't want me to watch. So I just, I looked, I watched the wall.

• 1:12:13Rayna Greenberg?

  Bouncing.

• 1:12:14Speaker 00

  Are we dumb?

• 1:12:16Speaker 03

  I was just, they were fucking behind me.

• 1:12:18Speaker 00

  I can't imagine the situation I put her in when I thought about it today. I'm like, so you could have just killed both of us?

• 1:12:24Rayna Greenberg?

  Well, you could have jumped in like

• 1:12:26Speaker 03

  Oh no, I think I was, she knew I was, I was

• 1:12:29Rayna Greenberg?

  I love that you weren't even on the cuck chair. You were like, I'm on the bed.

• 1:12:31Speaker 03

  I was on the bed.

• 1:12:32Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm here for the ride.

• 1:12:33Speaker 03

  I think it was a cheap room. I don't think there was anything else to say.

• 1:12:36Rayna Greenberg?

  There wasn't a chair. There's no chair.

• 1:12:38Speaker 00

  Bro, it was, it was an end of a sort. Isn't it crazy how like, when you start to think back of situations, not only would I not have fucked that guy, I would have never went to that home, that room.

• 1:12:50Rayna Greenberg?

  No, the fact that we're all alive.

• 1:12:52Speaker 03

  Alive is a blessing.

• 1:12:54Rayna Greenberg?

  If I start thinking too deeply, I will like shudder.

• 1:12:57Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:12:57Rayna Greenberg?

  Like those nights where you're like, how did we survive?

• 1:12:59Speaker 03

  Uh, I know. My homegirl Jazz is the most wildest bitch ever. I remember going to Philly one night and literally these guys drove by, music was loud. She said, let's get in the car with them and go with them.

• 1:13:11Rayna Greenberg?

  Let's get in the car.

• 1:13:12Speaker 03

  And we literally hopped in cars of random strangers.

• 1:13:14Rayna Greenberg?

  I would get in cars with drug dealers who drive around the block.

• 1:13:18Speaker 00

  They tell you something.

• 1:13:19Speaker 03

  No, no.

• 1:13:20Rayna Greenberg?

  You don't know what they're gonna do to you.

• 1:13:21Speaker 03

  Well, I do that now.

• 1:13:22Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm two feet tall. What am I gonna do?

• 1:13:24Speaker 00

  Well, for the pickup, I gotta get in the car.

• 1:13:26Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:13:26Speaker 00

  Also, when the drug dealer tells you to get in the car, cause you gotta pick up whatever it is, you're like, oh my god.

• 1:13:30Speaker 03

  Oh no, not anymore. I'm not doing a run with anybody.

• 1:13:32Rayna Greenberg?

  Like I'm such a baddie. I used to all the time I was 22, driving around New York to buy drugs in people's strangers' cars.

• 1:13:37Speaker 03

  It's crazy.

• 1:13:37Speaker 00

  No, I deadass was thinking. Just about how I put myself in crazy situations, whether it be to have fun, go to an after-party.

• 1:13:46Speaker 03

  Oh, one-night stands with people you meet online, like to me, and not to make this morbid, but there's so many stories that keep coming out of like, girls being killed by people from, like first off Craigslist killer was a thing too. Like, so to know that people were like, meeting people for sex off of back pages.

• 1:14:03Speaker 00

  Hold on, wait.

• 1:14:03Speaker 03

  Craigslist, like without pictures and shit.

• 1:14:05Speaker 00

  Have you guys ever had a story where you're like, oh my God, I have to get out of here. He's gonna kill me. Have you ever had someone that bad?

• 1:14:11Rayna Greenberg?

  I mean, I've just, I've put myself in situations that I shouldn't have put myself in.

• 1:14:15Speaker 00

  Absolutely.

• 1:14:16Rayna Greenberg?

  Thrilled and I'm okay.

• 1:14:17Speaker 00

  Like a feeling.

• 1:14:17Ashley Hesseltine?

  Killing, I don't, I've never felt like killed, but I, a few times, I mean, this is like dark, where I was like, I think I was gonna get like assaulted.

• 1:14:25Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:14:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  Like I, I have like one specific thing, it makes me like emotional to talk about, where I was like, the way I got myself out of there, like, you know, you just, you have that feeling.

• 1:14:34Speaker 00

  Were you in New York?

• 1:14:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  One happened in Atlanta and one happened when I was like in Delaware. They're both like washing over me and you're like, something bad is about to happen. And I think all women have intuition. Some women wouldn't feel comfortable running out of a house. One time in Atlanta, I, this guy went in the bathroom, it had started to escalate in a way. I didn't feel safe. And I, when I tell you I ran out, left things, like ran out of the house and like, figured out how to get home. And you just have a feeling.

• 1:15:00Speaker 00

  That story you're telling right now, do you know what it makes me think of? It's the girl that had sex with someone she didn't want to, they tell that story the next day. Because they didn't want to do that.

• 1:15:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:10Speaker 00

  We've been talking a lot about yeses and no's. Saying no is really hard. Like, it just is.

• 1:15:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  For women, because I think we're taught to placate, diffuse the situation.

• 1:15:20Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. To not make the male ego more fragile than it really is. So we have to protect his ego.

• 1:15:26Speaker 00

  I'm already here.

• 1:15:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  I'm here. I've already, I'm at his apartment, like.

• 1:15:29Rayna Greenberg?

  And so now do I get out?

• 1:15:30Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. And some people think, well, I owe somebody sex because I'm here and I don't know how to say no. I'm sitting on his bed and like, feel free to get up.

• 1:15:36Speaker 00

  He paid $250 for dinner.

• 1:15:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  Totally.

• 1:15:39Speaker 00

  Like there's a guilt trip that especially younger girls go through where they feel like, oh, he's expecting it. Oh, I kind of owe it to him. Oh, or maybe even, and we talk about this too.

• 1:15:49Speaker 03

  Been shared this notion that if you have sex with a guy, he's gonna like you more. So then there's that element of it where it's like, okay, well, if I put this thing on him, because unfortunately too, women believe they have the tightest, wettest pussy in the world and they're gonna be the exception and make this man fall in love. And it's just like, all of these things are still just for him.

• 1:16:08Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah, if you don't want to, just don't. That's a hot take. But like, I think that sometimes you're in a situation when you're younger and you're like, it's easier to just do it. And I'll have sex for fifteen minutes and then I don't have to have the conversation.

• 1:16:20Speaker 00

  I hate that we're acting like nobody can be that girl. Because no one wants to admit they're not confident enough to say no. But at the end of the day, think about how many times a friend wants you to go somewhere and you really are enjoying your bed, but you go and you're like, damn, I just.

• 1:16:33Speaker 03

  I think the, the thing that me and my friends are working through now are questioning if we said yes. Because we've had so many blackout nights. So the way we would party and drink and maybe this guy, yeah, I wanted to end the night with him. Like, I've had times where I, it was with guys that I dealt with and I would have to ask them the morning, the next morning if we had sex. And so there's this thing now with me and my best friend, well, and I have eleven best friends, but a lot of us are having the conversations about, damn, we can't do the blackout shit anymore. Like, do you know how much sex that we've had that we don't remember? How healthy is that? Like, one of my friends just went back on a date with someone from the past. And I was like, okay, well, was it that good?

• 1:17:14Speaker 03

  Cause bitch, that was a toxic ass thing. And she was like, every time we had sex, we were drunk. I don't remember if it was good or not. So even those conversations as adults, it's like, there's the consenting part, but then there's like the damn. There's the yeses we don't remember either, which makes us question if it was even a yes.

• 1:17:32Ashley Hesseltine?

  Right. And you've really gotta question someone if you know how, I, I don't get drunk like this anymore, but I used to. You fucked me. And we've also had sex where both parties are blacked out and you both don't remember this, but have you guys ever had situations where you were so drunk? And you wanted to have sex and they like denied you because you were too drunk. That's when you're like, I should, I should look into this. Like where it's a good guy that's like, I'm not fucking you like this. And you get mad. You're like, am I?

• 1:18:00Speaker 00

  This happened to me on my boyfriend's birthday last week on a cruise. So the motion and alcohol just, but I got in the bed and I put on this cute outfit and I was. I just remember he said, baby, you don't feel good.

• 1:18:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  You don't feel.

• 1:18:16Speaker 03

  That means you all look great.

• 1:18:17Speaker 00

  Like, so the next day I was like, what happened? He was like, you didn't know, but I'll take it now. I don't know.

• 1:18:24Rayna Greenberg?

  Now I'll take it.

• 1:18:24Ashley Hesseltine?

  Have you been denied for being too drunk?

• 1:18:26Rayna Greenberg?

  Definitely.

• 1:18:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's so embarrassing.

• 1:18:28Rayna Greenberg?

  Wait, what about Superbad?

• 1:18:29Speaker 00

  Superbad, when she came out, I got a little something. I think that's what I did. Under, yeah. Oh, yeah, I really think he jerked off.

• 1:18:37Rayna Greenberg?

  I'm not gonna.

• 1:18:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  No, you trip, they're like, not tonight. Okay. We want to wrap up with you guys, but we want to end on like, you know, an empowering note and like final messages. I mean, this book is really about like finding your power and realizing, can I just say, one of my favorite parts is this patriarchal bullshit.

• 1:18:53Speaker 00

  Thank you, matriarchal response. Thank you.

• 1:18:56Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's basically the beginning of every chapter, there's like a quote or something someone said, some man. And then you balance it with something that a woman said that's the reply to it. And I just think we should do that in our daily lives. And so I just think that's like a really empowering.

• 1:19:11Speaker 00

  You know how that happened? There was a chapter where I started talking about the patriarchy and we were on a Zoom with our co author. And it was like, okay, well, every story kind of is fucked up from the patriarchy. And I think maybe it was you or Tempest and it was like, let's bring up the patriarchy every time.

• 1:19:29Ashley Hesseltine?

  Ugh, love it.

• 1:19:30Speaker 00

  In every chapter, because I only thought it was specific to the love chapter. I was specifically talking about get married, do this, X, Y, Z. But no, every element of what we were talking about, our trauma, the things we thought we should be doing.

• 1:19:44Speaker 03

  Which by the way, it took, I found all the quotes and it took so long to find ones that matched each story. And then legally, oh, boy, we had to change a lot of, like, we had, like legally, if anyone's writing a book, adding quotes in it makes the process a lot longer. Like, we have a whole works cited page and we had to legally find the proof that these people said this where it was.

• 1:20:07Speaker 00

  For example, in the assault chapter, a very famous quote we all know, Donald J. Trump.

• 1:20:12Ashley Hesseltine?

  Grab him by the pussy.

• 1:20:13Speaker 00

  Grab him by the pussy, you can do anything to them, like, those types of things.

• 1:20:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  The matriarchal reply is so important too, because like, I like a balancing response. Like, here's this shitty thing, but here is like something that should make you. You feel better about the world too.

• 1:20:26Speaker 03

  And so we get quotes from very powerful women. I think we even have two from bell hooks, Adelore, Tracey Ellis Ross.

• 1:20:32Speaker 00

  I brought up Sarah Jessica Parker twice and that to me was the funniest shit. I was like, how much can I love Carrie? Not Sarah Jessica Parker, excuse me, Carrie.

• 1:20:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  Well, she formed our lives. Can we give an example, give an example of like your favorite patriarchal bullshit?

• 1:20:46Speaker 03

  For me, it probably comes from my abortion chapter.

• 1:20:49Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 1:20:49Speaker 03

  I'm thirty four and don't want kids ever. I don't want to be a mother. And so I think my quote probably came from like Sigmund Freud or something like that. Or it came from some man that believes that a woman's purpose, uh, purpose is to bring life into this earth. And if not, she's a useless whore. And then just the power in, and I think Tracey Ellis Ross is my quote for that.

• 1:21:09Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 1:21:09Speaker 03

  Like, I'm a woman who hasn't chosen to be a mother and I'm proud and I'm standing in that decision. That's been a common question with her recently. So that was my, my probably most favorite one because we're defined as women by becoming wives or becoming moms. I don't want to be either. And so it's been very important for me to define what legacy means to me. This book is my legacy now.

• 1:21:31Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. So I, I mean, I'll pull the Donald Trump one that we, we know. And this was the chapter about sexual assault. And his quote is, I'm automatically attracted to beautiful women. I just start kissing them. It's like a magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait. When you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything. Donald Trump, forty fifth and forty seventh president. And then this one was, I'm glad I was able to find it because the matriarchal reply is men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them. And that's Margaret Atwood. It just, they all just hit me, but that was like one of the most.

• 1:22:02Speaker 00

  That was actually the one that I was gonna say was my favorite.

• 1:22:04Ashley Hesseltine?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:22:04Speaker 00

  It was actually the only quote in the book besides the Donald Trump one that I really knew.

• 1:22:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  Right, right.

• 1:22:10Speaker 00

  I've heard that so many times. We're scared men will kill you. Like, and what's interesting is reading the audio book, I could not really hear much from the engineer, but that was one of the only, besides laughing.

• 1:22:22Speaker 03

  That was the time I heard him go, ooh.

• 1:22:24Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:22:25Rayna Greenberg?

  When you really think about, I forget who said it or what the exact quote was, but like women are, like straight women are the only people that actively pursue our only natural born predators.

• 1:22:33Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 1:22:34Rayna Greenberg?

  Our enemy.

• 1:22:34Speaker 03

  Yep, literally.

• 1:22:35Rayna Greenberg?

  Isn't that fascinating? And like also, by the way, the people that put the parameters around how we should look, how we should have sex, what boundaries we're supposed to have, who owns us, how we can relate to money. I mean, women didn't set any of those systems.

• 1:22:47Speaker 03

  And I do want to make it clear too. In each chapter, we talk about, yes, all of the traumas, the assaults, the heartbreaks. But we both are seeking these romantic partnerships or finding love with men. So it's not a male bashing book either.

• 1:23:03Speaker 00

  That's how we feel.

• 1:23:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, like, and I think it's.

• 1:23:05Speaker 00

  With a man, unfortunately.

• 1:23:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:07Speaker 00

  But.

• 1:23:08Speaker 03

  But the patriarchy. Like I talk about actually going through like a phase where I've realized like I've never felt safe. I talk about in my sexual assault chapter as well. Like I've only been with black men. I only want to date black men. I was upset that all of my assaults happened with black men. And it made me upset, like, why would you do that? And I'm having to work through that and having this trauma associated to the exact thing that I want.

• 1:23:31Speaker 00

  But that's the thing too. It's sexual assault. It's not black and white. I didn't even mean that to sound like that. It's literally not.

• 1:23:37Rayna Greenberg?

  But it's interesting because you think like, okay, if you get bit by a dog, like you have so many people that are like, oh, I don't like animals. I got bit by a dog as a kid. If you get bit by a dog, you're never going to go near a dog again, whereas straight women.

• 1:23:49Speaker 00

  Geez dude, that's so true.

• 1:23:51Rayna Greenberg?

  You have to continue to pursue these people that hurt you. And there's great men in the world and I have great relationships with men. We all do. And I've only dated men. I have great fathers, brother, men in my life. But yeah, like they were the predator.

• 1:24:03Speaker 00

  And this doesn't apply to them. And they, those men want men to be better because they're giving them a bad fucking name.

• 1:24:09Rayna Greenberg?

  Even the fun.

• 1:24:10Speaker 00

  We think about that with white women too.

• 1:24:11Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:24:12Speaker 00

  Like.

• 1:24:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:12Speaker 00

  The sexual assault stories, heartbreak, pain. It is really not like exclusive to color like I don't know, single motherhood, all of it. I think what is also interesting, like the love chapter, for example, is a really sweet, a fun chapter.

• 1:24:25Rayna Greenberg?

  I love it so much.

• 1:24:26Speaker 00

  That's actually my favorite.

• 1:24:27Rayna Greenberg?

  No, it was my favorite. I mean, and I'm like in love and it resonated and.

• 1:24:32Speaker 00

  Like finally.

• 1:24:32Speaker 03

  Let me tell you how happy I am. When we first started this book, I was still with my ex. So my chapters changed throughout the process of writing this book. We broke up and the love I thought I was gonna put in this book grew into hate and progression and healing and all these things. And I was like, I'm so glad I didn't immortalize.

• 1:24:49Speaker 00

  Oh, did you see my preface for the chapter? Just in case we break up. Oh, when he saw the hard copy of the book, oh, actually, so he.

• 1:24:57Rayna Greenberg?

  Cause you were like, I had to ask myself. We see like a lot of comedy specials and I see people like dedicate a lot to somebody. They like, oh, Ali Wong's special was all about her husband and they were quite divorced by the time it came out. You have to just remember there's like no shame when people break up. We've seen a lot of people create a lot of art around somebody.

• 1:25:14Ashley Hesseltine?

  It's very Carrie, where they did the Vogue and then they broke up and she had to be the last single girl. And they did the bridal and then they had to be like, they had to not get married.

• 1:25:23Speaker 03

  For people, Adele and Taylor Swift, it's worked for them. They've made whole albums around guys.

• 1:25:27Speaker 00

  No, they've made it around breaking up. Their pain has worked for them, but memorializing love and then being shit on is our scariest thing. So I sent him the chapter before it was in print. He gets the copy of the book. This is what it says. I have thought long and hard about whether I should include the current part of my life. Spoiler alert, your girlfriend love. My anxious thoughts, oh my God, what if we break up? What if this book gets published and it doesn't work out? Here's the fucking reality. Who cares?

• 1:25:55Rayna Greenberg?

  Yep.

• 1:25:55Speaker 00

  Granted, I could have skipped it in fear of something going wrong, but it's like, that's when my friend Liz Goldman told us, future fucking is real. Fuck it. Who gives a fuck if Ali Wong broke up with the husband? That was the moment that she needed to dedicate because he probably supported her through the comedy special.

• 1:26:13Rayna Greenberg?

  And then she wrote a whole other special about it. I mean.

• 1:26:16Speaker 00

  Oh, I know that. I love that.

• 1:26:17Rayna Greenberg?

  I always think about this moment where Ashley and I had this live show. I, this guy that I was seeing, I didn't know if he was coming or not. We were about to walk on stage and I was like, I don't, I'm like panicking. I don't. If he's gonna be here or not. I was like, I don't know what I'm gonna say. And she was like, whatever happens, that's what we'll say. If he doesn't show up, we're gonna talk about that. And it's just, that's the gift of like having a podcast and comedy and all this. It's like, you just turn it into art.

• 1:26:38Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:39Rayna Greenberg?

  Fortunately, I guess.

• 1:26:40Speaker 00

  It's the response that we're scared of. I'm not truly, it's the embarrassment.

• 1:26:45Ashley Hesseltine?

  The embarrassment, but you like that.

• 1:26:49Speaker 03

  What I say, y'all both hit it.

• 1:26:52Speaker 00

  No, no, no.

• 1:26:53Speaker 03

  This is why y'all.

• 1:26:54Speaker 00

  Was when it got tense and I said, she wrote this, right?

• 1:26:57Speaker 03

  Y'all did that.

• 1:26:58Speaker 00

  You know, right now, in all honesty.

• 1:27:00Ashley Hesseltine?

  That's your kink.

• 1:27:01Speaker 00

  Mandy and I, Alex talks about this time with Mandy and I, how we argued so bad. He jumped up, he thought he was gonna have to break us up from a fight.

• 1:27:07Speaker 03

  And then we got into laughing.

• 1:27:09Speaker 00

  And he was like, I used to think you were the best actress as a fan of the show. But then I realized, you guys are just like, oh, whatever. Not everyone can argue like that. And so I think we've made people more uncomfortable with our shit than each other.

• 1:27:25Ashley Hesseltine?

  Than you are.

• 1:27:26Speaker 03

  We've had moments on tour, fuck you, fuck you! And wait, in front of her friends, my friends, the staff, everyone.

• 1:27:32Speaker 00

  And then we'd be like, yes, bitch!

• 1:27:34Speaker 03

  And then we go out on stage and we twerking, ah, hey, y'all!

• 1:27:39Ashley Hesseltine?

  People have to come back around. They're like, okay, I think it's fine. I think they're friends.

• 1:27:42Speaker 00

  Oh, my God. We were.

• 1:27:43Ashley Hesseltine?

  This is the dynamic.

• 1:27:44Speaker 00

  I was irritated with Mandy for something. We were in Orlando and my friends were helping.

• 1:27:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  Orlando, that's where you fucked in the green room.

• 1:27:50Rayna Greenberg?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:27:51Speaker 00

  Plaza?

• 1:27:51Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yes.

• 1:27:52Speaker 00

  Yeah, Mandy started saying, fuck you, you're just talking shit to me because your friends are here, blah, blah, blah. So one of my friends, very like, I would describe him as a Brooklyn-y white guy, very stringy, long hair, very like, you know. He looks at me and he goes, dude, this is fucking intense.

• 1:28:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  The two of you?

• 1:28:11Speaker 00

  Yeah. God damn it.

• 1:28:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, loud. Do you guys, have you had?

• 1:28:15Speaker 00

  Security was scared.

• 1:28:16Ashley Hesseltine?

  This, you don't have to answer this if it's too personal. Have you almost broken up?

• 1:28:19Speaker 00

  Oh, so many times.

• 1:28:19Ashley Hesseltine?

  I brought you guys into the podcast.

• 1:28:21Rayna Greenberg?

  You announced ending the podcast.

• 1:28:22Speaker 03

  That was, that was marketing.

• 1:28:23Speaker 00

  I did not want to do that.

• 1:28:25Rayna Greenberg?

  That was a bit.

• 1:28:27Speaker 03

  That was rollout.

• 1:28:28Speaker 00

  So you know why I didn't want the bit?

• 1:28:29Rayna Greenberg?

  I was like, they broke up finally.

• 1:28:31Speaker 03

  Oh, all of our friends was like, we saw this.

• 1:28:33Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, everybody.

• 1:28:33Speaker 00

  No, bitch.

• 1:28:34Rayna Greenberg?

  We were like, oh, okay, finally.

• 1:28:36Speaker 00

  I didn't like that someone wrote me, was like, I'm sure you feel free. I was like, oh.

• 1:28:41Speaker 00

  But here's why I didn't want to do it.

• 1:28:42Speaker 03

  It was a rollout. I was here for it.

• 1:28:43Speaker 00

  People, in a time that's very sensitive.

• 1:28:46Rayna Greenberg?

  You guys call our daddy people. You got, that's crazy.

• 1:28:49Speaker 00

  Bitch, but they, they really hated us.

• 1:28:50Speaker 03

  They really broke up.

• 1:28:51Speaker 00

  I was scared of the thing pieces of how people would make me feel. Would they pull an old clip of like, one of us being mean to the other?

• 1:28:58Speaker 03

  I was ready.

• 1:28:59Speaker 00

  And I just, I, I can't do that. Like, I don't do well with outside noise when I'm trying to improve something internal. In my relationship with Mandy, I want it to be great every day. Today's a great day.

• 1:29:10Rayna Greenberg?

  It seems like it.

• 1:29:11Speaker 03

  It was. We've been riding together.

• 1:29:12Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, you guys are so, you guys are so stupid. You're friends.

• 1:29:15Speaker 03

  Like, we laughed with each other today. We wrote here. It was an hour to hit here.

• 1:29:18Rayna Greenberg?

  Do you guys love each other?

• 1:29:21Rayna Greenberg?

  What are you guys saying?

• 1:29:22Speaker 00

  Let me tell you guys where to get.

• 1:29:23Rayna Greenberg?

  You guys don't know anything.

• 1:29:24Speaker 03

  You guys can get the book where every person.

• 1:29:27Rayna Greenberg?

  Yeah, we do have to.

• 1:29:27Speaker 03

  Your journey is powerful, just like ours. You've gone through things, whether you agree with me and maybe see yourself in a fight.

• 1:29:35Speaker 00

  Ashley and Raina.

• 1:29:37Speaker 03

  We represent.

• 1:29:38Speaker 00

  We need you.

• 1:29:39Speaker 03

  Women of all walks of life.

• 1:29:40Rayna Greenberg?

  Mandy's like, read my chapters. Don't read Reese's. My chapters are one, three, five.

• 1:29:45Speaker 00

  Reese is my trauma. What the fuck? Dude, no lie. Ooh, we should do a celebrity therapy session. And we'll keep bringing in other podcasters to help break us down.

• 1:29:55Rayna Greenberg?

  Wait, I like that idea.

• 1:29:56Speaker 00

  I'm down. I love this.

• 1:29:57Rayna Greenberg?

  You guys are not me a reality show.

• 1:29:59Speaker 03

  We're not doing this. We're not doing, we're not.

• 1:30:00Rayna Greenberg?

  What?

• 1:30:00Speaker 00

  Oh, I can talk about my feelings easily. Like, you asked me that question. I don't care. I don't care if your answer is no.

• 1:30:06Rayna Greenberg?

  You guys have a refreshing.

• 1:30:07Speaker 00

  Do I like her right, like, now?

• 1:30:09Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:30:10Speaker 00

  Do I like her every day?

• 1:30:11Speaker 03

  Will she like me tomorrow? Maybe not.

• 1:30:12Speaker 00

  No, that's the true thing, but.

• 1:30:14Speaker 03

  That's the true thing about a lot of friends.

• 1:30:15Speaker 00

  I've known Mandy since I was 15 years old.

• 1:30:17Rayna Greenberg?

  Right. And I didn't know that till I read the book. Yeah, I didn't know either.

• 1:30:19Speaker 00

  That part of our relationship maybe shaped some of the ways that like, I get over things. Like, a lot of my friends have made comments to me like, I couldn't work with someone that said that to me or did that. And you probably felt the same or had the same. And I'm like, yeah, but our moments of anger are very ugly. And it's because we don't have friendship there, but I don't really take those moments of anger as I can never do this again. Sometimes it's hard, but what happens in friendship and in romantic partnership, your moments of anger aren't that bad because you're trying to keep this love going the whole time. Whereas we can't, we don't have that blinder. We're just like.

• 1:30:59Ashley Hesseltine?

  There's no love here. I can't be clear enough.

• 1:31:00Speaker 03

  You guys, I don't believe you. I don't like the word love. I'm, I'm dealing with that right now. Okay. I respect this relationship and I know that there's ups and downs. Yeah. An absolute level of respect there, which in reality, you can love someone and not respect them. And we see that in relationships all the time. So I'll say like, there's a level of respect here and we have a baby that we are raising and growing and rebranding and.

• 1:31:23Ashley Hesseltine?

  You guys are co-parenting is what's the relationship.

• 1:31:26Speaker 03

  That's literally what we're having.

• 1:31:27Ashley Hesseltine?

  That is exactly actually your relationship.

• 1:31:29Speaker 03

  This is the only kid, all of my businesses will be my baby.

• 1:31:32Speaker 00

  All right. Well, tell people where they can find the book.

• 1:31:33Speaker 03

  Wherever the fuck y'all read books.

• 1:31:35Ashley Hesseltine?

  Everywhere you buy books.

• 1:31:36Speaker 03

  Amazon. We also have been urging to support local, woman-owned, queer-owned, black-owned bookstores.

• 1:31:43Ashley Hesseltine?

  Which ones do you like?

• 1:31:44Speaker 03

  There's Two Sisters Cafe in Atlanta. We're going to be doing Uncle Bobby's in Philly.

• 1:31:48Speaker 00

  There's Mahogany in DC.

• 1:31:49Speaker 03

  Mahogany in DC.

• 1:31:50Speaker 00

  Oh, but the most exciting thing about ordering now though, so maybe if an easy order for you is Amazon, fuck it. We know they're terrible people, but we have a masterclass we put out.

• 1:31:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:31:59Speaker 00

  So we know that a lot of people don't like to preorder because you're like, fuck it, I'll just get it when it's there. So we put out a masterclass so that you can actually learn all the things that we will talk about in the book.

• 1:32:10Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay.

• 1:32:10Speaker 00

  So in the pain section, you read about BDSM.

• 1:32:13Speaker 03

  I go to a dungeon. So the dungeon that I explained, it is available until July 1st. So if you've ordered the book within this first week of its release, then literally just upload your receipt. There's a form on our Instagram page and you get the masterclass with it, which

• 1:32:26Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:32:26Speaker 03

  will be dope because by then you'll have the book in your hand. I, there's a whole chapter about my experience at the dungeon. I'm in the dungeon in the master class.

• 1:32:34Ashley Hesseltine?

  Fuck yeah. Okay. Well, so they can listen to your podcast decisions, decisions. If you guys want to listen to their last episode with us, it is September 20th, 2021. It's called Inside the Sex Club. Get the book, listen to the podcast.

• 1:32:47Speaker 03

  Last time?

• 1:32:48Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. Thank you guys for being here. We love you so much.

• 1:32:51Speaker 03

  We're bringing the book from the pages to the stages.

• 1:32:53Ashley Hesseltine?

  Oh, and you're on tour all summer.

• 1:32:54Speaker 03

  NHB tour from July to September 21.

• 1:32:57Speaker 00

  We also have Facebook.

• 1:32:58Ashley Hesseltine?

  What's the, what's the website?

• 1:33:00Speaker 00

  And one day MSG.

• 1:33:01Speaker 03

  NHB tour.com. And then in 2026, you can see the four of us live at MSG. Date not announced yet.

• 1:33:08Speaker 00

  That's just gonna be total United Nations. It's gonna be.

• 1:33:11Ashley Hesseltine?

  I love it.

• 1:33:12Speaker 00

  So much fun.

• 1:33:13Ashley Hesseltine?

  Okay, love you. Bye. Okay, guys, and you know where to find us. GirlsGottaEat.com, GirlsGottaEat Podcast on Instagram and TikTok. I'm Ash Hess, Raina is Raina dot Greenberg. Subscribe on YouTube, show this episode with a friend. Get the book. And we just want to let you guys know there's not going to be a snack this Thursday or Monday. We're taking a little time off this summer. So, uh, so cover this episode up, listen twice, listen back to an old ones and we'll miss you. We always miss you guys.

• 1:33:37Speaker 00

  We do miss you guys.

• 1:33:37Ashley Hesseltine?

  Yeah. Have a good week, guys. Bye.