Can You Stop? | Practice Love

You tell yourself you’ll go to bed after one more episode. You’ll put the phone down after one more scroll. You’ll pay your tab and leave after one more drink. That was the last time you’ll ever do that again, you say.📕 Ryan Holiday's new book "Discipline Is Destiny" is out now! We’ve extended the pre-order bonuses for the next week—among them is a signed and numbered page from the original manuscript of the book. You can learn more about those and how to receive them over at Dailystoic.com/preorder. ✉️ Want Stoic wisdom delivered to your inbox daily? Sign up for the FREE Daily Stoic email at https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, and Facebook See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. 📢 Share | ⚙️ Manage Subscription

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Ryan Holiday?

  Bienvenidos al Daily Stoic Podcast. Cada día te traemos una meditación inspirada por los antiguos estoicos, ilustrada con historias de la historia, eventos actuales y literatura para ayudarte a ser mejor en lo que haces. Y al principio de la semana intentamos hacer un profundísimo descubrimiento, estableciendo una especie de intención estoica para la semana, algo para meditar, algo para pensar, algo para dejarlo contigo, para journalizar, lo que sea que te ocurra de hacer. Así que vamos a entrar en ello.

• 0:39Ryan Holiday?

  ¿Puedes parar? Dices a ti mismo que irás a la cama después de un episodio más. Te dejarás el teléfono después de un scroll más. Te pagarás tu tarjeta y te irás después de un bebé más. Dices: "Esa fue la última vez que harás eso nunca más", dices. Y entonces aquí estás de nuevo. Porque no estás en control, el dispositivo es, el estimulante es, el miedo es, el hábito es. Seneca, que escribió sobre los ricos y privilegiados de su tiempo, señaló que, ya sea que creyeron o no, todos eran esclavos. Algunos eran esclavos a dinero, otros a una señora, a la atención o a los aplausos. No es similar al mundo de hoy cuando podrías ser esclavo de swipear en alguna aplicación de dating o el sonido de tu vape o la ocupación de un horario completo. Algunas de estas adicciones o formas de servidumbre

• 1:24Ryan Holiday?

  pueden ser más aceptables socialmente que otros, pero permanecen una violación de esa clave virtud estoica: temperance, auto disciplina, auto control. "Toma a mí y verás", dice la voz, "más es todo lo que necesitas y más es todo lo que quieres, aunque ya te ha causado tanto problema, aunque te ha lastimado a ti y a otros, incluidos los que te importan." No, más no es lo que necesitas. Lo que necesitas es parar. Lo que necesitas es reassertar el control, hacer claro quién está en el cargo, y que esa persona mejor sea tú. Not the puppet master, not the urges, not the device, not the intemperance. And look, if you want to take back control of yourself, if you want to put yourself back into

• 2:07Ryan Holiday?

  control, if you want to tap into that virtue that the Stoics were talking about, I do hope that the new book can help you do that. That's what it's all about. Discipline is Destiny, The Power of Self-Control is now out in the world. I appreciate everyone so much who supported the book. It's been the biggest launch I've ever had. All of your support means so much to me. I signed over 10,000 copies of the book. I'm still signing more because we're honoring the preorder bonuses. If you missed it, you can grab a copy of Discipline is Destiny, The Power of Self-Control, anywhere books are sold. Or if you want to grab a signed copy or want to redeem your bonuses, you can do that at dailystoic.com/preorder. And if you're a podcast person, which clearly you are, you're listening to this, the audiobook is out, which I also recorded. You can grab it on Audible, iBooks, anywhere you get your

• 2:52Ryan Holiday?

  audiobooks. The ebook is out too. I can't wait to hear what all of you think. And thanks to everyone for supporting Discipline is Destiny, The Power of Self-Control, which is out now everywhere.

• 3:08Ryan Holiday?

  Practice love. The Stoic notion of Sympathia, that we are all part of an organic whole, connected by mutual interests and affinities, is greater than the golden rule. Don't treat others how you would like to be treated. Treat them like you would treat yourself, because we are all one. Seneca said that whenever he encountered another human being, he saw an opportunity for kindness. And he learned from Hecate of Rhodes that if you want to be loved, there's only one thing you can do: love others. Who can you give love to this week? What kindness can you expend? How can you show how you feel to strangers, to friends and family? And how can you show them that you actually believe we are all part of the

• 3:48Ryan Holiday?

  same whole? And this is from this week's entry in the Daily Stoic Journal, 366 Days of Writing and Reflection on the Art of Living, by yours truly and my co-writer and translator, Stephen Hanselman. I actually do this journal every single day. There's a question in the morning, a question in the afternoon, then there's these sort of weekly meditations. As Epictetus says, "Every day and night, we keep thoughts like this at hand. Write them, read them aloud, and talk to yourself and others about them." You can check out the Daily Stoic Journal anywhere books are sold. You can also get a signed personalized copy from me in the Daily Stoic store at store.dailystoic.com. You know, I talked about this a little bit in the All is One chapter of Stillness is the Key.

• 4:32Ryan Holiday?

  There's a quote I like from Seneca. It says, "All that you behold, that which comprises both God and man is one. We are all part of one great body." And there's this quote I love from Edgar Mitchell, the astronaut who was up in space looking down at the Earth. And he says that he felt an instant global consciousness, a people orientation, and intense dissatisfaction with the state of the world and a compulsion to do something about it. So this idea that we are all one, this this sympathy idea to me is the essence of Stoicism. Stoicism isn't to make you an island, to disconnect you from other people. Quite the contrary, Seneca says it's to make you kinder and more connected to other people. And Seneca, the three quotes we have today, one is Seneca quoting Hiccupo.

• 5:17Ryan Holiday?

  He says, "I can teach you a love potion made without any drugs, herbs, or special spell, if you would be loved, love." And then in The Happy Life, Seneca says, "A benefit should be kept like a buried treasure, only to be dug up in necessity. Nature bids us to do well by all. Wherever there is a human being, we have an opportunity for kindness." And then in Moral Letters 95, he says, "Nature produced us as a family, since we all sprang from the same source and towards the same end. Nature bestowed upon us mutual love and joined us together as friends." I think going out into nature, looking at something majestic, or as Edgar Mitchell did, looking at the Earth from a distance, it does give you this sense of our interconnectedness.

• 6:00Ryan Holiday?

  It makes a lot of the things that we get angry about feel very petty and small and insignificant. Being around your kids does this as well. You see just how sweet and innocent and pure they are. And it feels weird to carry anger or resentment about anything or anyone. But one of the things I wanted to do in today's episode, I wanted to riff, give you a little TikTok that we did that was popular. You might think that the Stoics are kind of these unfeeling people, and I get that, but it's actually not true at all. Seneca says, "If you want love in your life," he says, "then love." Marcus Aurelius says that he learns from one of his mentors, "to be free of passions, yes, but full of love." Do you have affection for other people? If you want to feel good, if you want to be loved by other people,

• 6:44Ryan Holiday?

  it's about what you put out in the world, as the Beatles say. It's about the energy you put out in the world, because ultimately, that's what you control. If you want to feel better, don't go expecting other people to validate you, other people to give you what you want. Give what you want. Marcus Aurelius says, "If you want to feel good, do good. If you want to feel loved, put love out in the world. Put affection out in the world. See everyone you meet," as Seneca says, "as an opportunity to practice kindness, and the rest will take care of itself, I promise." As the Beatles say, "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make." What are you putting out in the world? What are you contributing to the whole? How are you remembering that we are all, you know,

• 7:26Ryan Holiday?

  one finger on a large hand, or that we're all part of the same body? The more you feel this, the more connected you are to it. Not only will your anger, and fear, and resentment, and anxiety dissipate, but you will do better, you will be better, you will make the world a better place. That's my message for today. Go out and do a kindness. Go out and do something good. If you want to feel good, do good, as the Stoics say. And I'll leave it there. Sympathia, everyone. We are all part of the same whole.

• 8:00Ryan Holiday?

  Thanks for listening to the Daily Stoic Podcast. Just a reminder, we've got signed copies of all my books in the Daily Stoic store. You can get them personalized, you can get them sent to a friend. "The Obstacle is the Way," "Ego is the Enemy," "Stillness is the Key," the leather-bound edition of The Daily Stoic. We have them all in the Daily Stoic store, which you can check out at store.dailystoic.com.