FedSmoker Jr Strikes Again! | Your Mom's House Ep. 836

Tom will be filming his new stand-up special in Milwaukee at The Riverside Theater on November 14th & 15th! Tickets are still available in Milwaukee for the November 14th show. Go get your tickets now at https://tomsegura.com/tour. SPONSORS: - Go to https://Helixsleep.com/YMH for 27% Off Sitewide. - Head to https://BlueChew.com to get your first month of FREE with promo code YMH - Head to https://www.squarespace.com/MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code MOM. It’s almost Jeans-giving, and Tom Segura & Christina P are feeling thankful for historical revisionism, meth-fueled prophets, and the sweet smell of 1700s body odor. The Main Mommies kick things off with a totally factual retelling of Thanksgiving, then dive into life (and death) before antibiotics — when losing a tooth could mean losing your brain. Tom unveils his plan to hit 3% body fat “just to feel something”, Christina confesses her papier-mâché addiction, and they dissect the seeming reincarnation of everyone’s favorite tweaked out double agent asking cops, “What’s your serial number?” Add in J. Lo’s silent treatment to her bus driver, a Barbie with diabetes, and a guy who physically can’t eat a pickle — and you’ve got a classic hour and some change of unhinged YMH magic. Your Mom’s House Ep. 836 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:45 - A Stinky History Lesson 00:08:06 - Opening Clip: What's Your Serial Number? 00:15:49 - FedSmoker Jr 00:20:46 - A Quick Lipshits Plug 00:21:46 - Clip: Cool Neighbor Lady 00:25:48 - Tom’s 3% Body Fat Plan 00:32:15 - Vial & Disgusting Fat Guy 00:38:25 - Christine's Craft Hoarding Intervention 00:43:33 - Piss Break & Diabetes Barbie 00:47:28 - Jennifer Lopez 00:58:35 - Clip: Master Of Clits 01:02:13 - Clip: Afraid Of Pickles 01:06:42 - Horrible Or Hilarious 01:12:15 - Clip: Ryan Wants To Be Recognized 01:13:12 - Wyatt Buhl 01:18:00 - Closing Song -"White Girl (With A Fat Ass)" by Odd-Track Numbers Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Tom Segura?

  What's up, everybody? I'll be in Milwaukee this weekend for three shows at the Riverside Theater on November 14th and 15th, filming my new stand-up special. I'll also be in Las Vegas on Friday, November 21st at Dolby Live. Get your tickets now at tomsegura.com/tour.

• 0:28Tom Segura?

  Now that the weather's finally cooling down, I want to take a second to talk about my go-to supplier when it comes to lighting up a cigar. Whether you're a seasoned smoker, or you just want something to hold while you're hanging around a fire pit this fall, Cigars International has you covered. I can't think of a better excuse to go outside, carve out some alone time, when you find yourself desperately in need of a break from any turkey day-induced stress. As the industry leader, Cigars International enhances these moments with unbeatable deals so you can stock up or try something new without breaking the bank. They've even got free everyday shipping, no codes, no minimums. You just buy the cigars and they show up, that's it. With Cigars International's unbeatable deals and discounts, there's no better time to

• 1:10Tom Segura?

  stock up and take advantage of what is arguably the best time of the year to be a cigar guy. Use code YMH at checkout for 20% off your orders of $50 or more, or visit cigarsinternational.com/ymh and the discount applies automatically. Some exclusions apply. Welcome to another episode of Your Mama's Place. And we are here, and we're queer, and we're not going anywhere, not till we get our rights. So, get married to your dog and listen to this show. It's gonna be a good one.

• 1:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's almost jeans-giving.

• 1:48Tom Segura?

  I know, I know.

• 1:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's wild. My jeans are so tight for it.

• 1:52Tom Segura?

  This is the day-

• 1:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  I can't believe it.

• 1:54Tom Segura?

  -that fucking-

• 1:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fucking-

• 1:56Tom Segura?

  -the Indians were walking around, just fucking blowing wind out of their mouths at the air, hoping that it would rain. And luckily, the Europeans came and said, "Let us show you how it's done." And it was a really nice day, and they came and they're like, "We have bread, and we have chickens and guns. Do you want to try them?" And then everyone became friends. And that's kind of a neat thing about Thanksgiving.

• 2:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  It is. That's exactly how it happened.

• 2:23Tom Segura?

  Everybody became friends.

• 2:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. You know, can you imagine, I always think about this, how cold it was outside?

• 2:30Speaker 02

  So cold.

• 2:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  So cold.

• 2:32Speaker 02

  And how hot it used to be, too. We've had air conditioning like sixty years. Can you imagine what it was like to live like here in Texas?

• 2:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, my god.

• 2:41Speaker 02

  Eighteen fifty's or something?

• 2:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, my god.

• 2:44Speaker 02

  How horrific that would be?

• 2:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  But even those settlers, like, they were all, fuck you, England. I'm gonna go do my shit in America.

• 2:50Speaker 02

  And then take a boat across the ocean.

• 2:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  So miserable. And then they showed up here and they're all, whoa, it's cold as fuck, huh?

• 2:57Speaker 02

  Ah.

• 2:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's all snowing here and shit, dude.

• 3:01Speaker 02

  Nah, it must've sucked.

• 3:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  And they're like, these Indians gotta teach us how to, you know, fucking shelter.

• 3:05Speaker 02

  Well, we forget how common death was.

• 3:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 3:08Speaker 02

  Death just happened all the time. It wasn't weird. Like, it wouldn't be like, oh, my god, somebody died. Everyone was like, yeah, someone, like, ten people died.

• 3:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just dusted. Well, I was thinking, um, how many times, like, you and I would have been dead already.

• 3:21Speaker 02

  Oh, my god.

• 3:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like, when you broke your arm and snapped your patellar tendon?

• 3:25Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 3:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  You probably would have just died.

• 3:27Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, people would be like, what were we gonna do with them? Can't do anything anymore. Just let them die here.

• 3:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  They wouldn't even have picked you up.

• 3:34Speaker 02

  No.

• 3:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 3:36Speaker 02

  I was gonna, ah, and then they would be like, just leave them. I don't know. They'd throw some food down, eat that, and then die.

• 3:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, they definitely would have amputated your arm. Like, you would be, and if you lived through that?

• 3:47Speaker 02

  Oh, my god.

• 3:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  They didn't, probably didn't have wheelchairs.

• 3:51Speaker 02

  And how crude would the amputation be? Like, give me just a saw, and then give me some tequila. I was like, ah.

• 3:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Bite the stick. It'd be so cool. And then I broke my ankle. I would have had, I would be amputated.

• 4:03Speaker 02

  Just cut shit off. But way before then, I'd been so, I've gotten sick so many times, you know? Where, like, you had to have antibiotics and everything. They just would have been like, yeah, he's just, he's dying. It's fine.

• 4:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or like, um, ear infection? You're like, I'm just deaf. I'm just deaf.

• 4:18Speaker 02

  Deaf and dead.

• 4:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 4:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  How do people live? How did you even survive?

• 4:23Speaker 02

  You had to be one tough motherfucker.

• 4:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or even like tooth decay. You had a cavity dude?

• 4:29Speaker 02

  Then you get brain rot. You just go right into your brain.

• 4:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or they just ripped out your tooth. No anesthesia.

• 4:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, we'd all have brown, yellow and missing teeth. You'd go, and it'd be like four teeth left.

• 4:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know how I'm a gay lord for like the seventeen, eighteen hundreds and like the court and all that?

• 4:47Speaker 02

  Gayaest person ever. I know. Yes.

• 4:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  So I'm really into like Marie Antoinette and that court. That's so gay. Do you know back in the day, like when all those ladies had those massive gowns? You know, it's not like you fucking pull your pants down and you take a shit in the bidet. So they had chairs, like wooden chairs that you would like hoist your dress up in and then hopefully you sit down and take a piss. And of course it wasn't flushable. There's no plumbing.

• 5:15Speaker 02

  No, I know. That's another thing. Plumbing.

• 5:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  Thank God.

• 5:19Speaker 02

  And how people would smell. I think about that sometimes.

• 5:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  All the time.

• 5:22Speaker 02

  Just you sitting in your, your layers of velour, you know, there's like five layers just cooking in there.

• 5:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 5:31Speaker 02

  And then bathing with it was a task. So they'd just be like, well, do it, do it in a few days.

• 5:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or you bathe with like your bathing costume?

• 5:38Speaker 02

  Or imagine the smells that would come out as you took them off. Like it would finally the smells would come out. And then someone was like, you want to fuck? And you'd be like, oh.

• 5:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, I was watching this comedy called The Decameron. I'm probably not saying it right on Netflix. It's so good. And there's this one scene where these two lesbians are eating each other out.

• 5:56Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 5:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  And I was like, dude, like, how bad does that one chick's beaver smell? You know, they don't shower in the whole thing. Yeah, this is so funny. It's so good. Fluid bond with Jesse. I'm probably not saying right. The Decameron. It's really smart and really funny and well acted. I have no idea. Can you look that up, Josh? I'm, I'm sure not.

• 6:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's a historical whatever play.

• 6:22Speaker 02

  D?

• 6:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's Italian, I believe.

• 6:25Speaker 02

  All right.

• 6:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  And the music's cool. Whoever did it.

• 6:30Speaker 02

  Okay. Okay. There you go.

• 6:34Speaker 02

  How to pronounce the name of this book? Originates a book and it's also a TV series Netflix, so let's break it down. How to pronounce it?

• 6:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, dude, go for it.

• 6:46Speaker 02

  De Cameron.

• 6:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  De Cameron.

• 6:48Speaker 02

  De Camerun. If you wanna learn how to pronounce character names, absolutely.

• 6:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, well, anyway.

• 6:55Speaker 02

  De Camerun.

• 6:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  De Camerun, it's brilliant. It's so funny and dark and the music's insane and the acting is insanely funny.

• 7:01Speaker 02

  Great.

• 7:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  And they eat each other out in like the smelliest time.

• 7:06Speaker 02

  Do they talk, are they like?

• 7:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's during the plague. It takes place.

• 7:09Speaker 02

  Oh, my God, your pussy smells.

• 7:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  No. I wish. It takes place during the plague. So everyone's dying left and right.

• 7:16Speaker 02

  Oh, God, yeah.

• 7:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's a plague comedy.

• 7:18Speaker 02

  Do you realize how common death would have been to you then? If you were, you'd be like, everyone I know is dead.

• 7:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 7:22Speaker 02

  Everyone I know is dead.

• 7:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, that's the joke. Like, that's the long-running joke is how frequent people died and the characters you love just die.

• 7:30Speaker 02

  But how would that affect, I'm saying, your life? You would just, you would not attach yourself to anyone, right? You would have like a distance of everybody?

• 7:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know what? It's like being old.

• 7:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Cause the elderly don't like new relationships, I've heard.

• 7:43Speaker 02

  Right.

• 7:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like, you don't wanna get married at 80, cause you're like, why am I gonna do this?

• 7:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 7:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, I agree. You're probably way more, um, flippant with your behavior. But they did believe in an afterlife. So there is a threat of heaven or hell. So you probably weren't a total piece of shit.

• 8:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  But you were like, fuck it, dude. Like, I don't give a fuck. I'm gonna die.

• 8:05Speaker 02

  Fuck it, dude. I'm fucking gonna die.

• 8:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, fucking whatever, homie. Holy shit.

• 8:09Speaker 02

  Whatever.

• 8:12Speaker 02

  Probably were just into.

• 8:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  I wonder if they effed as much as they do in like the tutors in my TV shows about Henry VIII?

• 8:21Speaker 02

  I think once everyone's dying around you, I don't actually think you go, let's just fuck. Who cares? You're probably just like, I just don't wanna do anything, cause everyone's dying.

• 8:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, like you, you're like, I have 25 years to live.

• 8:32Speaker 02

  I think your horniness probably dips down.

• 8:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're bummed out all the time about death.

• 8:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, like, god damn, I just, I just had lunch and someone died at the fucking table. Yeah.

• 8:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  That is so true.

• 8:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 8:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Cause you're just like, oh, did you hear Nicholas is dead? And you're like, oh, okay. What's for lunch? Yeah, it's that common.

• 8:52Speaker 02

  It's a lot, a lot of death.

• 8:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  And your kids died. You had to have like 10 of them so that two would survive.

• 8:58Speaker 02

  Jesus Christ. Alright.

• 9:01Speaker 02

  You ready to start this thing?

• 9:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 9:03Speaker 02

  Got something good for you. Here we go.

• 9:10Speaker 03

  Name and serial number?

• 9:12Speaker 04

  You mean my, my ID number?

• 9:13Speaker 03

  What is your serial number?

• 9:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 9:15Speaker 04

  Like my people's office, is that what you're asking?

• 9:17Speaker 03

  Your serial number.

• 9:18Speaker 04

  Could you please, my name's Chris. Okay, so could you please explain specifically what you're needing?

• 9:23Speaker 03

  So what is your serial number? That's how we do things with LAPD. So what is your serial number?

• 9:27Speaker 04

  Oh, okay. So you want like the employee ID number?

• 9:29Speaker 03

  Your serial number.

• 9:30Speaker 04

  That's not, that's not the same thing.

• 9:32Speaker 03

  Well, that's how LAPD does things.

• 9:33Speaker 04

  We're not in LA, man, are we? No.

• 9:35Speaker 03

  It doesn't matter. So what is your serial number?

• 9:36Speaker 04

  If you want my ID number, it's 97474.

• 9:39Speaker 03

  Okay, so that's your serial number?

• 9:45Speaker 02

  Fuck yeah. We're back, baby.

• 9:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's back. So good, dude.

• 9:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Welcome.

• 10:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Meow, meow, meow. Meow, meow, meow, meow.

• 10:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, I feel it.

• 10:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wow.

• 10:35Speaker 02

  How are these things different?

• 10:38Speaker 03

  Your serial number.

• 10:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Take it easy, fuckhead.

• 10:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  I mean, doesn't this make you believe in reincarnation?

• 10:49Speaker 02

  Yes, this is the same guy.

• 10:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's the same.

• 10:53Speaker 02

  This is the same guy.

• 10:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  And he's learned nothing.

• 10:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, yeah, he's reincarnated to wreak havoc again.

• 11:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, there's always a menace and it's him. It's him. God is like, we need this.

• 11:06Speaker 02

  And I gotta say this, this cop is like really handling this well.

• 11:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, yeah.

• 11:12Speaker 02

  Like that's as good as a, like an exchange can go. If you're, if you're, you're questioning a cop. Hey, what's your fucking serial number? And the guy's like, what? And it's King County, right? So he's what? That's in Washington. So he's like, and then this guy's like LAPD. He's like, yeah, we're not in LA, buddy. We don't do that. He's like, anyway, what's your fucking serial number?

• 11:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know, and he's so sweet.

• 11:35Speaker 04

  That's what we call people soft here. That's your employee ID.

• 11:38Speaker 03

  Nope, it's serial number.

• 11:39Speaker 04

  No.

• 11:41Speaker 03

  That's how we stay in LA.

• 11:42Speaker 04

  Is this a joke? Is this, are you my big punk?

• 11:45Speaker 03

  I guess you got nothing better to do but sit around here?

• 11:47Speaker 04

  Uh, finished my lunch, I did.

• 11:49Speaker 03

  You're sitting here running the unit?

• 11:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 11:52Speaker 03

  Burning gas. Costs maybe $50 to fill up the tank. $50, $100 to fill up the tank.

• 11:58Speaker 04

  Oh, no, no, gas prices isn't that bad.

• 12:01Speaker 03

  So why don't you turn off the unit since you have the windows down?

• 12:05Speaker 04

  Well, otherwise the radio won't work.

• 12:06Speaker 03

  Well, you got your handheld radio.

• 12:09Speaker 04

  Uh, I'm supposed to keep that available so when I get out of the car, I can check batteries.

• 12:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  He didn't follow Proto, buddy. You're done. But how is it that he even has the same strain in the voice?

• 12:23Speaker 02

  I know, it's exactly the same. Probably a similar lifestyle. You know, maybe the lifestyle makes your voice, you know?

• 12:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  You nailed it.

• 12:32Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 12:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  Gene.

• 12:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Bro, Gene, you nailed it. But what is this lifestyle?

• 12:37Speaker 02

  Oh, I can go through it. Well, you don't really sleep in a regular pattern. You know, you don't go like, well, my circadian rhythm's important and it's time to go to bed now.

• 12:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Right.

• 12:48Speaker 02

  You sleep at odd hours, usually probably minutes at a time. You eat street food and shit from 7-Eleven, probably a lot of sugary drinks.

• 12:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're sleeping in a car.

• 13:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or a bus or something.

• 13:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, you don't really lay flat on something comfortable.

• 13:05Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 13:47Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 14:24Speaker 02

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• 15:08Speaker 02

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• 15:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's like a lot of A M P M hot dogs.

• 15:37Speaker 02

  And then there's like some natural gifts you were born with upstairs. And then you probably can exacerbate the situation by what other things you drink and smoke.

• 15:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Right, or snort. And I think too, maybe the yelling.

• 15:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, makes your voice hoarse.

• 15:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  A lot of yelling.

• 15:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 15:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Especially police officers.

• 15:59Speaker 02

  To the cops. And again, he also, how do they both find cops all the time that were willing to engage?

• 16:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  So sweet.

• 16:05Speaker 02

  Yeah. Most cops, I feel like if you were like, what's your, they'd be like, who the fuck are you?

• 16:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or they should.

• 16:12Speaker 02

  What are you doing asking me questions asshole?

• 16:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, this one's so nice.

• 16:15Speaker 03

  I guess you got nothing better to do but sit up in the shade and apparently this is more important.

• 16:22Speaker 03

  Well, these homeless people.

• 16:23Speaker 04

  It's nothing to do with me, but okay.

• 16:25Speaker 03

  Yes, it is. You're sitting around doing nothing.

• 16:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, my God.

• 16:27Speaker 03

  How much money do you get paid? Two hundred thousand dollars a year like LAPD?

• 16:33Speaker 04

  Absolutely not.

• 16:35Speaker 03

  What agency do you work for?

• 16:38Speaker 04

  Kinko.

• 16:39Speaker 03

  Are you a certified peace officer in the state of Washington?

• 16:42Speaker 04

  Yeah, I am.

• 16:44Speaker 05

  I'm a fucking American, you fuck.

• 16:47Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  What was it? Drew said that cocaine, you run away from the cops.

• 16:55Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 16:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Meth, you run to.

• 16:57Speaker 02

  Towards them, yeah. Cocaine, you see a uniform, you jump out a window. And on meth, he's like, you see like fifteen cops, you're like, I'll fuck all you guys up.

• 17:08Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 17:10Speaker 03

  You gotta get it going, bud.

• 17:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's so good. This is what a treasure. Do we have any more?

• 17:17Speaker 02

  Fed Junior? Oh, yeah. Sure.

• 17:20Speaker 03

  How you doing?

• 17:22Speaker 02

  He's filming these poor little sweet college boys.

• 17:26Speaker 03

  Because you don't play a dress up wearing shorts and that.

• 17:30Speaker 02

  Just like him.

• 17:30Speaker 03

  Top of the suit.

• 17:34Speaker 03

  You're copying, what is that airline? Southwest Airlines that has their employees wearing shorts and that. You're like a fool.

• 17:43Speaker 03

  Why did you know that?

• 17:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, why do you know that? How did he know?

• 17:46Speaker 03

  It cost you job, imagine.

• 17:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yo, how did he know that was a Southwest employee outfit? Like, I've seen them a million times. I couldn't tell you what their outfits are.

• 17:59Speaker 02

  Some of these guys that get this like meth savant shit going on where they can somehow recall things they've seen in passing.

• 18:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh!

• 18:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's fucking wild.

• 18:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's astounding.

• 18:10Speaker 02

  It's astounding.

• 18:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  I can't remember that.

• 18:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  And he, and that kid even said it. He's like, how do you fucking know that?

• 18:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wow.

• 18:17Speaker 02

  This is just a fucking college sophomore, right?

• 18:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Sweet, yeah.

• 18:21Speaker 02

  They're just doing their, they're minding their business. They're going to something and that's what the, the, the Herc legacy, I would say is most known for is disrupt people who are just minding their own business and living their life peacefully.

• 18:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  But my favorite too, yes, that's true, Tom, and that's what makes him so special. But I also liked when he would go into like city council meetings.

• 18:45Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 18:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Because you have to understand too, that you've got to wait a long time. You've got to get through metal detectors.

• 18:52Speaker 02

  It's the worst.

• 18:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's the whole thing. You've got to listen to a lot of people saying boring stuff.

• 18:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  And then he waits for his three minutes or whatever.

• 18:59Speaker 02

  Yeah. And then you accost people.

• 19:04Speaker 06

  Southwest.

• 19:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, I look like a fool. If you're gonna, if you're gonna wear the top, you should wear the bottom.

• 19:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's true. And that's true. He's right.

• 19:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:17Speaker 03

  Maybe next time I see y'all have all your information.

• 19:20Speaker 07

  Yeah?

• 19:20Speaker 03

  Never know.

• 19:22Speaker 07

  That'd be a little weird though.

• 19:25Speaker 07

  It's a little creepy, isn't it?

• 19:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:27Speaker 07

  You need some kind of joke or something?

• 19:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  It, it is true though, to wear a blazer and then khaki shorts.

• 19:33Speaker 02

  Oh, it's goofy as shit. It's, it's a horrible look, but you know, it's still just, they're kids.

• 19:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 19:39Speaker 02

  They're kids just doing their, they're going to something together, right? They're probably going to some social event.

• 19:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. Is that a fraternity look?

• 19:45Speaker 02

  Looks like it.

• 19:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is that like a thing?

• 19:47Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 19:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. Okay. So they're, they're just, so he, he targets fraternity boys and police.

• 19:52Speaker 07

  Specifically Sigma Chi fraternity.

• 19:55Speaker 02

  Yeah. Sigma Chi is what he's all about.

• 19:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  What, what are the Sigma Chi about? Like, do they represent something that?

• 20:01Speaker 07

  I, I don't think so. I think he just is kind of obsessed with them. I mean, do you, do you know Cougar? Is there more backstory to why that frat?

• 20:09Speaker 02

  Uh, I don't know. I mean, he also has some problems with Scientology.

• 20:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  No.

• 20:14Speaker 02

  The Church of Scientology.

• 20:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Goes without saying.

• 20:15Speaker 02

  He's got this convoluted conspiracy, I think. No.

• 20:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  No.

• 20:19Speaker 02

  Really? This guy?

• 20:23Speaker 02

  He's got another one here. Look.

• 20:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Aww. Look how cute these boys are.

• 20:27Speaker 08

  Are you recording us?

• 20:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:28Speaker 08

  What? Why?

• 20:32Speaker 08

  Why are you recording us?

• 20:33Speaker 03

  Cause I want to.

• 20:38Tom Segura?

  You good, bro?

• 20:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, have a good day.

• 20:44Tom Segura?

  Let me record you as well.

• 20:46Speaker 03

  I've had it.

• 20:49Speaker 03

  Because I want to.

• 20:51Tom Segura?

  No, but you can't do it without a permission, dude.

• 20:53Speaker 03

  Okay, what law is that?

• 20:55Tom Segura?

  What?

• 20:56Speaker 03

  What law is that?

• 20:58Tom Segura?

  What?

• 20:59Speaker 03

  Okay, what law says that? Can you name me the statute?

• 21:03Tom Segura?

  I don't know, it's just general courtesy, dude.

• 21:05Speaker 03

  Okay, courtesy is not law.

• 21:09Speaker 03

  Have a good day. Touching my camera through the fence, you faggot.

• 21:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:16Speaker 02

  Pretty cool. It's statute, by the way. It's not statue.

• 21:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  I thought I heard statue as well.

• 21:21Speaker 02

  Yeah. But, yeah, cool.

• 21:23Speaker 03

  Ta ta there, retard.

• 21:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm so excited to see the evolution of this talent.

• 21:27Speaker 02

  Well, it'll end soon. So, yeah, it's a great, great thing to get on now so we can see how it goes before it ends.

• 21:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. They burn out so fast, these guys.

• 21:34Speaker 02

  They do, man, they do. It's just the lifestyle of chasing white chariots and calling out, you know, baby... So, yeah, it takes, it takes a lot out of you. They definitely...

• 21:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  It does. You have to enjoy them while they're here.

• 21:47Speaker 02

  While they're here.

• 21:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Listen, as long as we're here, let me plug my lipstick. I have, I'm wearing Evermore Liquid Lipstick. This is Nocturne is the shade. It's very dark and very spooky for fall flavors. Try it out. Also, check out my Velvet Crush Blush. I have two shades out right now. It is so luxurious. I'm wearing them right now. And, yeah, try it out.

• 22:10Speaker 02

  And it's time to, you've got to get into your holiday shopping now.

• 22:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  Absolutely. And I would say order them now because I do limited batches. I order them in limited runs from Italy.

• 22:20Speaker 02

  Italy.

• 22:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Italy. Takes a while to get here. And then here's the different shades you can choose from. Oh, it's such high-quality stuff, you guys. And it's fun. It's a little weird. Thanks, Meow.

• 22:31Speaker 02

  Thanks, Meow.

• 22:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's me.

• 22:32Speaker 02

  That's cute.

• 22:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's what I do, that's my...

• 22:34Speaker 02

  That's what I do. Do you guys want to get some blush with your back up?

• 22:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I do your face? Can I do you?

• 22:42Speaker 02

  No, I'm good.

• 22:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Why?

• 22:44Speaker 02

  I'm good. You want to, you know who else has a really interesting voice?

• 22:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh.

• 22:47Speaker 02

  Is the lady in this clip. Check this out.

• 22:55Speaker 09

  Thank you.

• 22:56Speaker 10

  My garbage disposal went out.

• 22:57Speaker 09

  Oh dang, I don't have one.

• 23:00Speaker 10

  Yes you do.

• 23:00Speaker 09

  No I don't.

• 23:01Speaker 10

  Why not?

• 23:03Speaker 09

  It wasn't one installed, so I gotta get one installed.

• 23:06Speaker 10

  These houses have always had garbage disposals, they always came with them.

• 23:09Speaker 09

  Not in mine.

• 23:10Speaker 10

  I never heard of such a thing.

• 23:11Speaker 09

  He must have took it out.

• 23:13Speaker 10

  What a motherfucking wacko.

• 23:15Speaker 09

  Yeah, I don't have one.

• 23:16Speaker 10

  Are you positive?

• 23:17Speaker 09

  Yeah, I got somebody to check, I don't have one.

• 23:21Speaker 10

  You looked under the sink?

• 23:22Speaker 09

  He did, yeah. It's not one there.

• 23:25Speaker 10

  Why would you do that?

• 23:27Speaker 09

  Yeah, I bought one, I gotta get somebody to install it.

• 23:30Speaker 10

  What'd you buy?

• 23:31Speaker 09

  Huh? I bought one from Lowe's, but I'mma wait because I want a new sink, so I get it all done at one time.

• 23:38Speaker 10

  Horsepower, you know.

• 23:39Speaker 09

  Yeah, mhm.

• 23:40Speaker 02

  Three quarters.

• 23:41Speaker 10

  I just had to order one.

• 23:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  It sounds like Joey Diaz.

• 23:46Speaker 10

  Second time, third time I've already replaced this. Every ten years they go out.

• 23:50Speaker 09

  Well, at least you got one, I don't.

• 23:53Speaker 10

  Yeah, I've always had one. I never heard of such a thing. They all came with garbage disposals.

• 24:00Speaker 09

  Not me.

• 24:01Speaker 10

  Why would you take it out?

• 24:03Speaker 09

  I don't know.

• 24:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I tell you something though? This conversation is so stupid.

• 24:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 24:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  And boring.

• 24:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 24:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm like, I wanna shoot myself.

• 24:12Speaker 02

  I know, but I could, I just could listen to her talk for an hour.

• 24:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  The voice is incredible.

• 24:16Speaker 10

  What are you talking about?

• 24:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  What are you talking about?

• 24:18Speaker 10

  I've never heard of such a thing.

• 24:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's literally what she sounds like.

• 24:21Speaker 10

  They all came with garbage disposals.

• 24:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is a voice we-

• 24:24Speaker 10

  Why the hell would you take one out?

• 24:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is a voice-

• 24:27Speaker 10

  Fucking insane.

• 24:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  You and I heard a lot growing up because of cigarettes.

• 24:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know, it's another bummer.

• 24:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 24:33Speaker 02

  That we don't get these voices anymore. They're only in people that are about to die.

• 24:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 24:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  This was like vintage, this bitch existed everywhere when you and I were kids.

• 24:44Speaker 02

  Oh yeah.

• 24:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 24:46Speaker 02

  And, you know, not to make it a thing, but it's also kinda, it also kinda sounds like, you know.

• 24:51Speaker 03

  We were fuck partners.

• 24:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 24:53Speaker 02

  Same kind of register.

• 24:55Speaker 10

  Uh, we were fuck partners.

• 24:59Tom Segura?

  That's why I got a garbage disposal.

• 25:02Speaker 10

  She sounds like Krusty the cloud.

• 25:04Tom Segura?

  Yeah. That is nuts. I wonder how much she has smoked.

• 25:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, but that, cause who does Krusty? Is it Dan Castaneda? Castaneda? I mean, he's so good. It's that same Krusty.

• 25:20Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 25:21Speaker 07

  Dan.

• 25:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, it's, it's that register. She's got to have shredded up her voice over years.

• 25:28Tom Segura?

  Physically thousands of cigarettes.

• 25:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Rippin darts.

• 25:31Tom Segura?

  Rippin darts. Yeah. No, I haven't smoked in years. That's what she would probably say. It's really bad for you. It fucked me up.

• 25:40Tom Segura?

  Now I'm just, you know, I drink my teas.

• 25:42Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 25:42Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 25:43Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 26:28Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 26:47Tom Segura?

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• 27:08Speaker 02

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• 27:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  God, I used to smoke so many cigarettes. Do you remember when we smoked? You just smoked like you were immortal.

• 27:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're just like, I don't fucking care.

• 27:54Speaker 02

  And I'm gonna go back. I'm going back, baby.

• 27:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  When are you gonna pick up cigarettes?

• 27:59Speaker 02

  Soon. I don't know.

• 28:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  Really?

• 28:01Speaker 02

  I hope so.

• 28:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, I do think, and this is probably inappropriate to say, but you know, I talked to my oncologist and she's like, there are people that smoke their whole lives.

• 28:12Speaker 02

  See?

• 28:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Never get lung cancer.

• 28:13Speaker 02

  I know.

• 28:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  And then the person who never smoked a day in their life.

• 28:16Speaker 02

  Gets lung cancer.

• 28:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dies of lung cancer.

• 28:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's really crazy.

• 28:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Do what you're gonna fucking do.

• 28:20Speaker 02

  Knowing my family history, it's probably not a good idea, but.

• 28:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  You guys are all made of cancer.

• 28:26Speaker 02

  Everyone's made of cancer in my family, on both sides, both sides.

• 28:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 28:30Speaker 02

  There's like a 0% chance that I'm not getting cancer.

• 28:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Stop.

• 28:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, hopefully it's an easy one.

• 28:37Speaker 02

  A nice one.

• 28:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  A nice cancer. Like, what's the dick one? The dick cancer that you just.

• 28:44Speaker 02

  Prostate cancer?

• 28:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 28:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm not looking forward to that.

• 28:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  What he did, because sometimes they don't even need to treat that. You just have to come a lot, right?

• 28:53Speaker 02

  No, that's not.

• 28:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Doctor Drew said that when he had it, remember?

• 28:56Speaker 02

  No, I think you're, that's not the message.

• 28:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's what, that's how he got cured.

• 29:00Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no, he had, he had surgery. He had his prostate removed.

• 29:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  And then he had to come a ton. He had to come once a day. He talked about this before.

• 29:08Speaker 02

  What we're talking about are two different things. It's that if you are active and ejaculating a lot, it's good for your prostate. It's good for your prostate to be active, right?

• 29:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 29:17Speaker 02

  But, once you have an issue with your prostate, if you have prostate, they don't go, just keep coming, it'll beat it. They have to surgically remove it. Yeah.

• 29:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  But I'm saying for you.

• 29:28Speaker 02

  For me in particular.

• 29:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wouldn't you love to get, if you have to choose?

• 29:32Speaker 02

  No.

• 29:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  That kind, because then you can come a ton.

• 29:36Speaker 02

  No, I don't think you're understanding the situation. That's not how this works.

• 29:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay. He did say that on the rehab side of it, he had to come a ton.

• 29:46Speaker 02

  I wonder if my new diet that I'm on will help or hurt that.

• 29:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  What are you doing now?

• 29:51Speaker 02

  So I hired a bodybuilder nutritionist and he gave me a plan. And the goal is to get to, you know, like sub 5% body fat.

• 30:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  What?

• 30:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is that supposed to happen?

• 30:04Speaker 02

  I mean, it's not, they said you can't maintain it for long because you feel like you're gonna die. I just wanna see what it feels like.

• 30:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  What?

• 30:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  But of course, you need some fat, Tom.

• 30:13Speaker 02

  Right, a whole 5%.

• 30:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, can you Google what's normal for a grown ass man, especially an elderly man like my husband?

• 30:20Speaker 02

  Excuse me, excuse me.

• 30:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, you're elderly.

• 30:23Speaker 02

  I'm not elderly.

• 30:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Aren't you 50 yet? 67.

• 30:26Speaker 02

  I'm 12 years younger than you.

• 30:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  You look 5,000 years old. Yeah, babe, the normal body fat percentage for middle age, that's you.

• 30:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  40 to 59 is generally considered to be, to be between 11% and 21%.

• 30:41Speaker 02

  I'm just gonna do 3, I'm just gonna try to get to 3.

• 30:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Babe, you're gonna have renal failure.

• 30:44Speaker 02

  That's fine. We already just went over, I'm gonna die.

• 30:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's true, you may as well be hot.

• 30:50Speaker 02

  Hit the show more stuff. There you go.

• 30:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Essential fat, necessary for survival.

• 30:56Speaker 02

  That's what I'm trying to get to.

• 30:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's what you wanna get to.

• 30:58Speaker 02

  I wanna get to that.

• 30:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're almost there, you sicko.

• 31:01Speaker 02

  I wanna get to like, almost not alive.

• 31:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Do Brad Pitt in Fight Club. Was he there?

• 31:06Speaker 02

  Oh, he was low, he was real low.

• 31:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  What's the fun, is, is it just to see your muscles and stuff?

• 31:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, just to see.

• 31:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just to see how good you look?

• 31:14Speaker 02

  He was between 5 and 6. Yeah, he was 155.

• 31:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's crazy, dude.

• 31:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's what you're gonna look like. And then you're gonna die.

• 31:26Speaker 02

  Probably better than that, cuz I'm gonna go down to 3.

• 31:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  How long are you gonna sustain this, babe?

• 31:32Speaker 02

  I mean, probably till you collapse. Apparently, you really wanna die when it's that low. I talked to some people, they said you really wanna fucking kill yourself.

• 31:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  Why is that?

• 31:39Speaker 02

  You just feel like absolute shit. You feel like shit morning, noon and night.

• 31:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  And this is-

• 31:47Speaker 02

  And your T drop, everything, you're just like, ah, you're just gonna be horrible. And then you're like, take a picture.

• 31:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  So it's just for the aesthetic?

• 31:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. And also just I want to see like how far I, what I will do when I, as I'm pushing myself and I go, I don't want to do this anymore and how far I can push it.

• 32:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  You gotta do a documentary.

• 32:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like The Biggest Loser, you know?

• 32:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  But like, yeah, he's fucking really funny, actually.

• 32:13Speaker 02

  Hey, here's a new doc about my body dysmorphia.

• 32:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 32:16Speaker 02

  What's the lowest you've gotten? Any, do you know what your walk around percentage is? Cause you're real lean. Uh, I don't think I've ever checked. I'll pay for you to get a DEXA scan. Okay, what does that entail?

• 32:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  They tell you how fat you are.

• 32:28Speaker 02

  You just lay down on this thing and it, and it has a full, you get like a full, that thing right there. And then it just, uh, gives you, see that image there on the, on the right? Uh, yeah. On the far right? Am I getting knocked out? No, no, no. Are you gonna put needles in me? No, no, no, no. They're gonna put anything in your ass? Nothing, you just lay still.

• 32:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's optional.

• 32:47Speaker 02

  You just lay still. And then it shows you your skeletal structure and everything going inside and it tells you, like, it breaks it down like that.

• 32:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's horrifying.

• 32:53Speaker 02

  You gonna touch me and shit? No, no one touches you. No one touches you. Yeah, okay, I'll do it. Okay. I'm, I'm interested. I want to know what yours is. What, what do you think it is?

• 33:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's like...

• 33:03Speaker 02

  I mean, I, I don't, I have no like, uh... Reference for it? I have no barometer, yeah, I don't know.

• 33:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's like a greyhound.

• 33:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 33:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's so lean.

• 33:10Speaker 02

  Yeah. Greyhound? Yeah.

• 33:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like a, you know, like a runner.

• 33:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 33:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're like a running animal.

• 33:16Speaker 02

  Yeah. You are. You are like a little gazelle.

• 33:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wait, why do men need fat, though? Cause women need it for like reproduction and like periods.

• 33:26Speaker 02

  I mean, various things, right? Like you...

• 33:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  What?

• 33:28Speaker 02

  Well, your body uses fat to, as an energy source and then it also provides you with some insulation, like, you know?

• 33:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dude, you're gonna be so cold.

• 33:39Speaker 02

  I know, I'm already cold. I'm colder than I've ever been. I'm cold all the time now. Yeah, that's just from dropping some weight.

• 33:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's true that the that's true. See, I always thought that was like a fat person myth.

• 33:52Speaker 02

  No.

• 33:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or like, oh, you're just hot all the time.

• 33:54Speaker 02

  I used to stand up and start sweating. So, yeah, it's pretty different now.

• 33:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is exciting for you.

• 34:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, I want to be emaciated, you know?

• 34:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 34:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know. You know, I I grew up in the Kate Moss era.

• 34:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  And like, nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. That's what she said. And it's like, it's so true. It looks so much better.

• 34:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  It looks so much better.

• 34:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, of course. I was thinking of my disdain for that guy we saw at that restaurant.

• 34:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know. I know. I know. It was like, we saw, we were in Boca and we saw a guy who was like the Monty Python sketch.

• 34:29Speaker 11

  Is this real? I can't eat anymore.

• 34:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, waffers, waffers thing.

• 34:34Speaker 11

  I'm full.

• 34:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  When you bring that up, it's like he eats so much that he explodes and pukes everywhere.

• 34:39Speaker 02

  And he's just like.

• 34:39Speaker 11

  Just one little waffer.

• 34:44Speaker 11

  I'll hurt me anymore.

• 34:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm fucking full.

• 34:47Speaker 11

  I'm fucking full.

• 34:50Speaker 02

  It's such a great sketch.

• 34:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  There, I know. Those guys are so great.

• 34:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  But I I get it. Like, the thing, okay, can I tell you what makes me sad is because we all want to be that guy.

• 35:03Speaker 02

  Right. He's indulge.

• 35:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, but you have to, like, there needs to be a mechanism in your dumb brain that goes, stop it, dummy, because you're gonna kill yourself.

• 35:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, and then some people don't have it.

• 35:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Or they do and they just.

• 35:18Speaker 02

  No, you push past it.

• 35:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 35:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Because I I get mad because I go like, oh, you're such a waste of life. Like, I, life is so precious and special to be a human, like, to be incarnated as a human. You you won the lottery, the cosmic lottery, and like, that's what you're gonna do?

• 35:35Speaker 02

  It's crazy.

• 35:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  I get so upset.

• 35:37Speaker 02

  I know. That's what I was looking at that guy. I was like, you're so disgusting.

• 35:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 35:41Speaker 02

  He was so vile.

• 35:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 35:44Speaker 02

  He was like, hey, we gotta move tables. Not enough room over here.

• 35:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 35:50Speaker 02

  And everybody was like, looking around, they're like, what do you mean? He was like, how can we fit, you know? And they're like, oh, yeah, of course, sir. And then they moved him to a table that was more room than they needed, but not if you're considering how fat he and his buddies were.

• 36:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  The whole family was like.

• 36:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  It was excessively large, I will say, like, so that people understand we're not just talking about someone carrying. It was literally like the Monty Python.

• 36:15Speaker 02

  No, it was like the.

• 36:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  It was a lot.

• 36:17Speaker 02

  It was the Eddie Murphy, like the.

• 36:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 36:19Speaker 02

  What are they, the Crum?

• 36:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  The Crumps.

• 36:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were just.

• 36:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Jesus Christ.

• 36:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were just fucking huge, man.

• 36:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  The Klumps, sorry, not the Crumps. Yeah, exactly, dude. And you're like, oh.

• 36:33Speaker 02

  Ah, all right.

• 36:37Speaker 02

  We get a couple of these, a prosciutto plate, so it's.

• 36:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  I remember, I know. And we were trying to eavesdrop so that we could hear what they were ordering. I'm like, I gotta hear what this is.

• 36:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 36:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's gotta be so much.

• 36:48Speaker 02

  And he sat like this at the table.

• 36:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. Oh, man.

• 36:53Speaker 02

  His hands were out here. I was like, God, dude, get your fucking shit together, man.

• 36:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, get your shit together. Get your life.

• 36:58Speaker 02

  Where did you go wrong? That's what I kept thinking.

• 37:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 37:00Speaker 02

  So anyway, seeing him made me go three percent, get to three percent.

• 37:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  I agree. I think that's a really healthy goal for you.

• 37:06Speaker 02

  You think so?

• 37:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, for sure.

• 37:07Speaker 02

  It's not bad?

• 37:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just gonna get down to it. It's perfect.

• 37:12Speaker 02

  Until I'm like, I can't.

• 37:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  Could you not try, just do me a favor?

• 37:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just could you not try to actively kill yourself?

• 37:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is it just, is this being married to me? You're like, I gotta try to die before.

• 37:24Speaker 02

  Huh, I never thought of that.

• 37:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Because you really have a leaning towards self torture. It's like, I'm gonna do the cold plunge and that's terrible.

• 37:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm gonna, I'm gonna pull the plow in the backyard. What is that stupid horse shit, the sled?

• 37:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 37:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Now I'm gonna get down to 2% body fat. I really think you might-

• 37:46Speaker 02

  Two, shit, I was thinking of three. Alright, two's the new goal.

• 37:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  Are you like suicidal?

• 37:51Speaker 02

  Huh.

• 37:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is it, is it me?

• 37:53Speaker 02

  You know, I'll take that one to therapy this week. It's a good, a good one to explore.

• 37:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 37:59Speaker 08

  You should go for the world record.

• 38:00Speaker 02

  What's the world record?

• 38:01Speaker 08

  I don't know, I'm just saying, you should go for the lowest possible body fat.

• 38:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, let's see.

• 38:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's gotta be like, what about like athletes? Whoa.

• 38:10Speaker 02

  There you go.

• 38:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  That looks crazy.

• 38:12Speaker 02

  Dude, that guy looks perfect.

• 38:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is that what you're gonna look? Ugh.

• 38:18Speaker 02

  2%, he's 2%. Yeah, I can't get to that.

• 38:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  He looks like beef jerky.

• 38:23Speaker 02

  It's a, it's a beautiful goal, but I can't get to it.

• 38:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's not beautiful. I don't like that.

• 38:26Speaker 02

  What do most bodybuilders compete at? Like, what, what's their, when they're competing, what are they at?

• 38:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  I don't like that at all.

• 38:36Speaker 02

  I'm wondering, it's gotta, I mean, it's gotta be five or around there, right? Three to eight, okay. And women, it's 10 to 15.

• 38:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  So that's, that's so low for a woman.

• 38:49Speaker 02

  Let's just do it. Okay, look at these percentages. Bodybuilding, three to eight, gymnastics, five to 12, marathon runners, five to 11, triathlon, five to 12, soccer, 10 to 18, tennis, 12 to 16.

• 39:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  But for women, 15 to 20, and that, and that means like you're losing your period at that.

• 39:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  We have to be way higher than you guys.

• 39:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's going away, dude.

• 39:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's gnarly.

• 39:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Nobody wants to hear that.

• 39:17Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 39:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  That sound.

• 39:18Speaker 02

  The drinking. Anyway, so you're gonna be seeing some kind of dramatic things coming these next few months.

• 39:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Hey, like the fucking machinist? Christian Bale.

• 39:28Speaker 02

  Well, the interesting thing is, you know, I got the, the plan, it's not starving. You're not starving, you're actually just eating, you're eating more times a day, but you're just eating specific things.

• 39:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  What are you, what are you eating? Just chicken?

• 39:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 39:43Speaker 02

  No, yeah, it's a lot of lean, it's a lot of lean stuff. Yeah. And then, yeah, there's some, there's carb cycling. Yeah.

• 39:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  Carb cycling?

• 39:50Speaker 02

  Yeah, high days, medium days, low days.

• 39:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, for fuck, it's just Tom.

• 39:54Speaker 02

  What? Why is that crazy?

• 39:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  What are you doing? What is this?

• 39:57Speaker 02

  Fucking 3% man.

• 39:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  What is, you don't have enough challenges in your life? You don't, you're, you're writing the TV show, you're taping a special, you're touring, you've got a family. And now you gotta, you gotta torture your body on top of this? Like, what, what is going on? Just do drugs. Could you just start taking drugs?

• 40:16Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 40:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're such an, is this an addict's brain? Is that what this is?

• 40:19Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 40:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can't be still?

• 40:20Speaker 02

  I don't know!

• 40:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just be still. Enjoy your money. Stop it.

• 40:27Speaker 02

  Nah, you gotta do something else.

• 40:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I tell you what I've been doing? And I want to actually take a minute here to thank Rob Eiler.

• 40:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  So, look, since I, I, I was sick last year, I started crafting pretty hard. And I, I really thank you for not pointing out the excessiveness of my supply buying.

• 40:48Speaker 02

  You do a lot of bullshit.

• 40:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  A lot of bullshit.

• 40:50Speaker 02

  Yeah. There's always a number of bullshit things that arrive at the house, usually on a daily or, you know.

• 40:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's daily, it's hourly, it's, it's a problem.

• 40:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 41:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  I admit that. But, um, yeah, I mean, we started off, I started off drawing, drawing you nude, which I sold that, which was very exciting.

• 41:07Speaker 02

  Thank you so much for that.

• 41:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  And then acrylic painting. And then I got into clay. And then I got to paper mache.

• 41:15Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 41:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  And I was buying like mannequins to put paper mache on and paint. And then I was telling Rob about the paper mache. Cause I got like paper mache pumpkins lying around, the kids are gonna paint them.

• 41:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  And, um, and I've been, I was saving newspapers to use later for the paper mache sculptures that I'm making. Saving boxes, saving papers. And Rob was like, Christina, you gotta stop this. You gotta stop this. I go, why? He goes, you're gonna ruin your marriage. This is, this is deal breaker type of shit. And I just want to thank you, Rob, because I threw away all the paper mache horseshit.

• 41:54Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 41:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  I knocked it off. I'm gonna fuck her. I'm not gonna do that stupid stuff anymore cuz it is a it's a lot of bullshit around the house. You're right. And I'm just gonna now I'm into watercolors. I just bought one little tiny palette. And just a one pad. That's all I'm gonna do for now.

• 42:10Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 42:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  Watercolors.

• 42:11Speaker 02

  Watercolors.

• 42:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  So maybe some art will be coming out of you. Those beautiful blue eyes.

• 42:15Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 42:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  But thanks, Rob. You're right. It was bullshit.

• 42:18Speaker 02

  Maybe I'll get into some artsy stuff too, okay? Would you like that?

• 42:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, can I tell you something? Can I talk to you for a second?

• 42:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  You'd enjoy it, but there's something about you that likes to torture yourself more. Like this kinda shit like I gotta get down to three percent body fat. Like there's something in you that the self-flagellation bit.

• 42:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  You like that.

• 42:40Speaker 02

  That's true.

• 42:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  You like to really fucking push it.

• 42:44Speaker 02

  I don't know why.

• 42:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  You don't like to enjoy yourself. This is not. You either pushing it to the max like that. Or you're just like chilling in bed watching murder. Like those are your two. It's like I perform in front of 10,000 people in an arena? Or I'm isolated in the house watching murder.

• 43:03Speaker 02

  Okay, you just described what it is to be a man.

• 43:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is that right?

• 43:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, we kinda, yeah. Like if we succeed, like there's no succeed. There's no success. Like you just gotta do the next thing.

• 43:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh.

• 43:14Speaker 02

  You gotta hurt yourself. You gotta feel like you're accomplishing something, beating something, you know?

• 43:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes, that does make sense.

• 43:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, that's lovely. I do like that.

• 43:23Speaker 02

  The plight of the man.

• 43:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  It is. What is it? Is it testosterone?

• 43:27Speaker 02

  I don't know if it's testosterone necessarily. I mean, I'm sure that plays a role in it, but I don't know. I don't know why that's the thing that men, a lot of men just go, well, don't. I guess it's just don't be complacent, right?

• 43:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, you guys have itchy assholes.

• 43:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, you gotta scratch them.

• 43:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  You gotta scratch your asshole. You gotta get out of the house. I gotta go. I gotta build. I gotta do. I gotta.

• 43:50Speaker 02

  But I also feel like I'm a better person.

• 43:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Than other people?

• 43:54Speaker 02

  No.

• 43:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh.

• 43:55Speaker 02

  I'm a better version of myself when I'm doing things.

• 43:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  A hundred percent because a man who doesn't have a purpose.

• 44:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Becomes very fucked up.

• 44:06Speaker 02

  That's real. That's very real.

• 44:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, sure. We've known men like this.

• 44:10Speaker 02

  We know them.

• 44:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 44:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  They don't figure something out like a passion or a drive.

• 44:15Speaker 02

  It's not good.

• 44:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's not good. It's not good. But you know, can I tell you? Can I talk to you for a second? This is what.

• 44:22Speaker 02

  Could you make more sounds over there?

• 44:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Stupid, I'm a fucking idiot. But the thing is, is I've noticed about like what, you know, we've been married for 20,000 years and like

• 44:31Speaker 02

  Oh my god, so long.

• 44:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is that I gotta let you have your itchy asshole? Don't even fight the itchiness. Let you itch it, scratch it, get in there, dig it in, and then you'll come back when you're ready. When your asshole's thoroughly cleaned out and irrigated and you're exhausted.

• 44:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Then you come home.

• 44:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 44:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  And then I'm like, hey babe, how's your, how's your butt?

• 44:52Speaker 02

  That's your summary. That's a pretty good summary, right?

• 44:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. Whereas me, like, I used to have an itchier asshole and now that I'm like, I'm chilled out. I love being home. I love gardening. I love my bullshit crafts.

• 45:04Speaker 02

  You find joy in it.

• 45:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  The cats, the kids.

• 45:07Speaker 02

  You're able to just be there.

• 45:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  To be. But I think women, yeah, when you're balanced, you can exist, your, your being.

• 45:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 45:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  And then the man is doing.

• 45:15Speaker 02

  I think men struggle with that more.

• 45:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  Being. Yes. And I know, and I always think it's weird that they're spiritual leaders, like they should definitely not be.

• 45:22Speaker 02

  They should not be.

• 45:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Men have to come and do things too hard.

• 45:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 45:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  They're not qualified. They're not. They're not. Okay, I have to piss. And then I want to discuss who this is here too.

• 45:33Speaker 02

  Okay, go take your pee. How was your pee?

• 45:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  It was good. It didn't smell like coffee anymore.

• 45:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 45:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  So I drank enough water.

• 45:40Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 45:41Speaker 10

  What a motherfucking wacko.

• 45:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  I love her so much.

• 45:44Speaker 02

  She's great. She's really great.

• 45:46Speaker 10

  You motherfucking wacko.

• 45:47Speaker 02

  Every, every house here has a garbage disposal. What are you talking about? Why would he take it out? You gotta get three quarters horsepower to run it. Yeah.

• 46:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's so cool.

• 46:00Speaker 02

  Thank you for that.

• 46:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  That is a very east coast vibe though. There, this is not a west coast. Like that voice never happened in

• 46:08Speaker 02

  No, that's definitely in the northeast.

• 46:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. That's a sad shut in. I feel like, I don't know this person, but I'm saying like Josh Potter? Like I imagine somebody he's related to.

• 46:20Speaker 02

  Is this person? That's hilarious.

• 46:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 46:23Speaker 02

  He's like, oh, that's my Aunt Edna.

• 46:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  A thousand, yeah, yeah. Like a Rochester.

• 46:27Speaker 02

  I'm the one that get Josh started on smoking.

• 46:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Exactly.

• 46:31Speaker 02

  I gave him his first cigarette when he was nine.

• 46:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is your aunt's house that you go to and she's got the cookies, the fucking Royal Dance Cookies from Rite Aid or whatever. Everything's from the fucking pharmacy.

• 46:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 46:49Speaker 02

  Yeah. She's rad, man.

• 46:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's a good one, yeah. Very American. Oh, sorry.

• 46:53Speaker 02

  What you got here?

• 46:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  This one, this is really cool. As you know, I collect all the Barbies that have come out. Uh, this one is type two diabetes Barbie.

• 47:01Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 47:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Which is really special. It comes with her little monitor.

• 47:05Speaker 02

  Sure, it's, uh, sold out. I mean, it's gotta be gang. All the kids are like, wow, I want diabetes Barbie.

• 47:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I tell you how they could actually sell these?

• 47:16Speaker 03

  You guys are doing good.

• 47:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Our sons would take this and fuck it up.

• 47:22Speaker 02

  Of course, they'd break the arms off of it.

• 47:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  A thousand. That's the only way you're gonna sell this is if you sold us to little boys so they could fuck them up.

• 47:28Speaker 02

  Yeah. And then Julian would be like, I'm trying to feed him donuts so that the sugar spikes.

• 47:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Exactly.

• 47:35Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 47:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Exactly. Or like the wheelchair Barbies, like our guys would race those down the driveway.

• 47:41Speaker 02

  Of course. I guess, you know, I mean, it's fair to say, representation does matter. So this is just so that, you know, the little girl out there who has diabetes

• 47:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 47:53Speaker 02

  feels like, oh, this is a doll that looks just like me, right?

• 47:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, as long as she's hot.

• 47:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, this, this, this doll is hot and sick like me.

• 48:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  They're always hot. Like even the Down Syndrome Barbies are like hot.

• 48:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's the weirdest, I mean, I guess, I guess Barbie is still a dream, you know?

• 48:13Speaker 02

  She's got her, her mobile phone and it's, it's set to the screen where you're monitoring your insulin, which is always fun for a child. Be like, oh yeah, my insulin. And then you can see the, the built in pouch.

• 48:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Aye, aye, aye.

• 48:26Speaker 02

  It's kinda cool, but she's got a sexy, she's got sexy shoes and a sexy purse and her sexy little skirt. Nice. Yeah.

• 48:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I don't know. Is that, is that the case? Like when you have an illness, do you want to play with?

• 48:40Speaker 02

  I think so.

• 48:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  The doll that helps you cope with it?

• 48:42Speaker 02

  I think so. I think you want, I think you wanna see things, people that look like you.

• 48:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 48:47Speaker 02

  I think that makes a lot of sense. Yeah.

• 48:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  Um, does she wear, does she have heels really?

• 48:51Speaker 02

  Yeah. Yeah, look, go, look, look in there.

• 48:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 48:54Speaker 02

  They're, they're.

• 48:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's so funny. I've got diabetes, but I'm still hot.

• 48:58Speaker 02

  Still hot. Yep.

• 49:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's a mini skirt, too.

• 49:03Speaker 02

  I know.

• 49:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is brilliant. Oh, she's even, yeah, she's got the patch on her, on her arm that's constantly monitoring.

• 49:11Speaker 02

  How come they don't have like sex worker Barbie?

• 49:14Speaker 02

  You know, like a straight up hoe.

• 49:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I mean, you don't think they want to see themselves represented?

• 49:20Speaker 02

  The children of a sex worker go, how come there's not one that looks like you, mom?

• 49:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  Thank you. Do better, Barbie. Do better.

• 49:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, I agree. You want to see something that's fantastic?

• 49:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'll be.

• 49:29Speaker 02

  You like music, right?

• 49:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I love music.

• 49:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, that was fucking. So that's J Lo, if you're listening. She's been in the news lately saying that like what she's all about is, you know, Broadway and that she was trained in musicals and like, I guess this is like a new direction she's gonna go in.

• 50:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, okay.

• 50:13Speaker 02

  So that she was singing here with her, her coach, Stevie. And it said, the review here says, she has received a good amount of hate for this.

• 50:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  What?

• 50:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  But she's so likeable. That's so weird. So humble.

• 50:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  So sweet.

• 50:29Speaker 02

  So I guess like that's what she's pushing towards next is to be on Broadway.

• 50:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Which is not a bad business move when you're not moving tickets for the concert.

• 50:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Cause I think these people that watch musicals, I'm not one of, it's just not my jam.

• 50:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  But I think when you have a celebrity headlining them, it's a big deal. It's a draw.

• 50:51Speaker 02

  It's a big deal.

• 50:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  I, I might go see it just to see her going.

• 50:56Speaker 02

  She walked away from that though, like you just heard that shit.

• 50:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's why, that's why it's so good.

• 51:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 51:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's why it's so powerful. Cause she believes she's amazing.

• 51:04Speaker 02

  I did that.

• 51:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 51:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 51:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  She, he, she does have the confidence of like our seven year old.

• 51:12Speaker 02

  I mean, I think maybe that's why you're a superstar.

• 51:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 51:15Speaker 02

  You have to have a real crazy level of confidence. Yeah.

• 51:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes. And in, and look, in her defense, that level of.

• 51:23Speaker 02

  But I'll say this.

• 51:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Has gotten her that far.

• 51:25Speaker 02

  Normally, when you see really impressive voices, they go, you know, they finish the, the note they're singing and they're just kind of like.

• 51:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  There you go.

• 51:36Speaker 02

  And everyone goes, holy shit. And they go, oh, come on.

• 51:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Me? Shucks. Yeah.

• 51:41Speaker 02

  But this was different. This was.

• 51:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's so true. Like Placido Domingo, you would watch him and he would just kind of look down at the like, I felt that. I felt it. Now it's out of me. And yeah, there's, there's, there's not a lot of humility.

• 51:57Speaker 02

  Yeah. And this one.

• 51:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  But this is why I think it'd be interesting to see her do Broadway. Cause I feel like Broadway two, you're going to get reviews.

• 52:05Speaker 02

  Tons every night.

• 52:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Every night, you're going to get that feedback straight away from the audience.

• 52:10Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 52:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're going to get canceled in a week. You know what I mean? Like you gotta fucking put ass in seats. I wonder how long she can do that for in Broadway.

• 52:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  I don't know. I'm here for it. I, I, what is she going to do? Do we know what play or what musical?

• 52:26Speaker 02

  I don't think it's said, I'm saying she's put it out there. Like what I'm.

• 52:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  What I'm great at is theater. Yes, yes, yes. That's right. I remember reading that.

• 52:34Speaker 02

  Oh, is this what it is?

• 52:35Speaker 07

  This is the new movie that's out, but it's a musical.

• 52:37Speaker 02

  Oh, it is a musical. Okay. And is it out now?

• 52:42Speaker 07

  Um, yeah. Yeah, it came out October 10.

• 52:44Speaker 02

  I mean, look at the reviews.

• 52:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  It came out?

• 52:46Speaker 02

  Seventy seven percent. That's not bad.

• 52:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Never even heard of it. No, that's fantastic.

• 52:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 52:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  I love Kiss of the Spider Woman.

• 52:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 52:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay. And so, so what are, so.

• 52:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  What are people saying? I've never even, I didn't even know this was out.

• 53:01Speaker 02

  This happens all the time now, though. Movies come out and it's not the same. It's not like it used to be where you'd always know what's out. It's, it's different.

• 53:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Cause this is a major undertaking, Kiss of the Spider Woman.

• 53:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, let's see, let's read about it. What's going on with this? Let's see what it is. Okay. This is a musical drama film written, directed by Bill Condon, based on the 1992 Stage Musical.

• 53:23Speaker 02

  Stars Diego Luna, Tona Tiu and Jennifer Lopez. It will, let's see. Positive reviews from critics. Yeah, it's, it looks like it's well reviewed, but it is a major box office bomb. Grossing just 2 million against a budget of 30. Yeah. So it's, it's not, people aren't going to see it, but they're not, they're saying it's good.

• 53:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's so interesting, cause I feel like J Lo really had a.

• 53:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's really crazy.

• 53:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  What's going on?

• 53:49Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 53:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is it social media now that we're seeing people's personalities?

• 53:53Speaker 02

  I've made people find her genuinely very unlikable.

• 53:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know, and I've heard story after story.

• 53:59Speaker 02

  Oh, there's a lot of stories. I have a personal story. I know one firsthand.

• 54:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can you share it?

• 54:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, I guess I can. So a couple of years ago, I was on tour and I was doing the bus thing. So I was chartering buses. And I don't really like it. Like, I don't like the bus lifestyle, just personally, but you know, it was just, it was a bus tour. So every week, bus would either pick you up at your house or you'd fly to the bus and the bus would take you for the run of the tour. And I hadn't signed a lease for, like, one time I did a bus for a year. This was like before I had done that. So I would charter different ones. And so one time I had some leg coming up and they offered me this really nice bus. They're like, they showed me photos, like this is like a state of the art bus. So I did it for like a week or two. It was like a, just a short period of time.

• 54:50Speaker 02

  And I got there and I was like, this bus is unfucking real. I mean, the bus looked like a luxury hotel. It was crazy. And when I got on, you know, I'm looking at it and talked to the driver and really nice guy. And he was telling me all about, you know, all the features that it has. It's like totally state of the art. It was incredible. And I go, God, like this bus feels like it's, you know, for a fucking superstar. And he was like, well, I just was with J Lo. And I go, no shit? And he goes, yeah, she had it for like. Six months or something, you know, for her tour. And I go, what was that like? And he was like, well. He's like, you know, everybody in the camp is really nice.

• 55:35Speaker 02

  Kids are nice and her boyfriend at the time was really nice. Everyone's really nice. And I was like, but? And he's like, well, he's like, we, you know, we never spoke. And I was like, for six months? He's like, no, we never exchanged.

• 55:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  The driver.

• 55:49Speaker 02

  The driver. And he goes, and I drove her like all over the country. And then he goes, the day that I dropped her off. So it was like, this is the last day. I dropped her off at her house and she just didn't make eye contact, just walked off and walked away. Never said like, goodbye, thanks, just nothing. But that to me is indicative of like a personality type. If you're the type, has somebody drive you for six months?

• 56:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know, but let, okay.

• 56:16Speaker 02

  You don't even say hello.

• 56:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  But to really understand the gravity of this too. So this bus life you're speaking of, it's very intimate.

• 56:23Speaker 02

  It's very intimate.

• 56:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's you, the driver. Sometimes that's it.

• 56:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, sometimes that's it. Sometimes it's, you know, the driver or somebody. And but the driver of like a charter bus like that, it's different, right? They are, they're not just, it's not like a bus in a city that's taking you from like stop to stop. The, that driver is the, he is the captain and the cleaner and the maintenance guy. He is, he is, he's like your pilot of the, you know what I mean? He does everything. So you have, you have a lot more interactions with them. It's not like, you know, when you, at a bus stop, you get on, you just walk on. You walk on in the morning and, you know, you greet them and then you realize that like, oh, they, they had like cleaned up this section of the bus and.

• 57:12Speaker 02

  Everything is taken care of and then, you know, he washed the windows and he made sure that like there's pillows on your bed. Like he does all of that. So you have like a really intimate, yeah.

• 57:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  But even, okay, but even from like a human thing.

• 57:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, of course.

• 57:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Hey, Rick.

• 57:31Speaker 02

  Good morning.

• 57:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I gotta take a shit, but I don't wanna shit in a moving bus. Can we pull over so I can stop and take a dump?

• 57:38Speaker 02

  She would relay that to somebody else, right?

• 57:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Stop.

• 57:40Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, she never talked to him for six months.

• 57:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just from like a safety or like a human.

• 57:45Speaker 02

  It's bizarre, but again, you know.

• 57:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's tough to do.

• 57:48Speaker 02

  There's something about like pop stars where they, you know, the whole thing is they be, they're divas.

• 57:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  I guess, yeah. I mean, in my world, in my mind, it would be harder not to speak directly with him.

• 57:59Speaker 02

  You'd have to make an effort to not speak to that person, yeah.

• 58:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can you tell him?

• 58:04Speaker 02

  Also, don't forget, there's also the moment that is where you kinda have the most interactions, especially with a familiar face, which is getting on and getting off.

• 58:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, every time.

• 58:13Speaker 02

  We would pull up to venues and you just walked up and be like, alright, Rick, thanks. I'll see you in a few hours. She never did that. Or you get back, or like the show's over, door's open. What's up, man? Where are we headed tonight? And he's like, it's a four hour drive. Alright, I'll see you when we're there. Like those things, none, zero.

• 58:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wow. And I also heard a story, I don't know where, it was on the internet somewhere, where it was before she was really, really, really famous.

• 58:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 58:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  And she wanted to see a movie at a movie theater and she had them lock down the entire theater so that she could come in the back way and watch a movie. And this is well before she had that type of celebrity to do something like that.

• 59:00Speaker 02

  I don't think people would care if she went anywhere now. I think 0% would flip out.

• 59:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  And not only that, like I would say that, you know, you're very recognizable these days. And like, we, we move around. It's really not that crazy.

• 59:15Speaker 02

  People just come up to you and they say hi.

• 59:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's not.

• 59:17Speaker 02

  Or they stare at you and say nothing. That's the other side, which is just what it is.

• 59:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  But if you were to go to a movie and just kinda sneak in with a.

• 59:24Speaker 02

  That's fine.

• 59:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're not gonna.

• 59:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, this is not.

• 59:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's not that amazing.

• 59:28Speaker 02

  Well, that's, you're not that type, you know?

• 59:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  Michael Jackson would have to have done that.

• 59:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's different.

• 59:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, I actually think that

• 59:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  Taylor Swift?

• 59:38Speaker 02

  Yeah, she can't do that.

• 59:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  She can't.

• 59:40Speaker 02

  But most celebrities, I'm talking about high level celebrities. They can go into the movies, it's fine. People would just be like, holy shit, that's who it is.

• 59:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  And that's it, and they shut up and they leave you alone.

• 59:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, nine times out of 10, it's normal.

• 59:51Speaker 02

  It's normal.

• 59:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  So she didn't need to have it.

• 59:53Speaker 02

  Which means that like she, that's the funnier part, actually, is that she had to go like, we need to shut down this venue. And then somebody like in her management had to be like, ah, wait, why? Uh, hello, I'm gonna get absolutely mobbed.

• 1:00:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Hello.

• 1:00:13Speaker 02

  Then the business manager would be like, that's such a crazy amount of money to spend on that. And she's like, do you want me to get fucking attacked? And they're like, okay, all right, that's fine.

• 1:00:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Right, again, and, and also, you can also just watch the movie at home. You could probably get a screener.

• 1:00:30Speaker 02

  Hello. That means somebody would have to bring it over to the house. I don't think so.

• 1:00:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  Why are you ruining that theater's day?

• 1:00:38Speaker 02

  It's just crazy.

• 1:00:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dealing with your nonsense.

• 1:00:40Speaker 02

  Let's pivot to something more fun.

• 1:00:43Speaker 06

  The woman guitarist can have green color. Red color is giving energy, life force. And we have green color, healing power. Okay? And white color is disinfection.

• 1:00:57Speaker 02

  Mm hmm. Hold on.

• 1:00:59Speaker 06

  Woman make love. And they think that the, the husband need more energy. So you use your thumb pointed to the guitarist and change the clit and the vagina into red color. So when you make love, you can feel that you have more red energy.

• 1:01:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:01:17Speaker 06

  And you can give your loved one with more life force.

• 1:01:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  But what's the green? That's infection.

• 1:01:26Speaker 02

  No, white disinfection.

• 1:01:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh.

• 1:01:28Speaker 02

  Right, green is healing, healing powers?

• 1:01:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  There's no way, I've never had it green.

• 1:01:33Speaker 02

  Well, you need to.

• 1:01:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  I don't know what's going on.

• 1:01:34Speaker 02

  You've got a lot of problems.

• 1:01:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  I've only, you know, I don't know if I had a white.

• 1:01:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, this is great.

• 1:01:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm not so sure.

• 1:01:41Speaker 02

  We gotta get you into more of green our balance and have compassion. Whites are purifying and calming.

• 1:01:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:49Speaker 02

  But red, red's fire energy.

• 1:01:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Red's where it's at.

• 1:01:52Speaker 02

  Gotta get that clit red. It's a new shirt.

• 1:01:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Stop it.

• 1:01:55Speaker 02

  Can we do a red clit shirt?

• 1:01:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, no. I'm gonna puke. No woman wants to hear this.

• 1:02:01Speaker 02

  Why?

• 1:02:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's so gross.

• 1:02:03Speaker 02

  What's gross about it?

• 1:02:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're red clit in this guy.

• 1:02:07Speaker 02

  What's gross? He's giving you energy advice. You don't think that's good?

• 1:02:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  Ugh, I do, I do think that obviously sex is an exchange of energy.

• 1:02:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  I don't like the color coordinated. I don't like it when he talks about it.

• 1:02:20Speaker 02

  Do you like this?

• 1:02:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can't there be a woman that can do that?

• 1:02:22Speaker 12

  She just wanna come in, come over for a snack and go.

• 1:02:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  That was cool. I kinda liked him.

• 1:02:34Speaker 02

  You liked it?

• 1:02:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, cuz he flubbed it.

• 1:02:37Speaker 02

  He flubbed it? Oh, oh.

• 1:02:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like, he wasn't cool. It wasn't, it wasn't slick.

• 1:02:41Speaker 02

  But isn't it kinda cool to be a little guy with a huge hog like that?

• 1:02:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 1:02:45Speaker 02

  That's kinda cool.

• 1:02:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 1:02:45Speaker 02

  It's kinda the best case scenario. If you're a little man, you have a big old dong like that.

• 1:02:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, don't you think?

• 1:02:52Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:02:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  I mean, this is probably stupid, of course, but don't you think they all have big ones in relation to?

• 1:02:59Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:02:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Being small in stature?

• 1:03:00Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:03:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  I mean.

• 1:03:02Speaker 02

  I think it's just like any other segment of the population when it comes to.

• 1:03:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just relative.

• 1:03:05Speaker 02

  Penises. No, I think it's relative. I think this guy has a genuinely large dong. And sometimes they do, sometimes they don't.

• 1:03:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  I don't wanna, I don't like it.

• 1:03:14Speaker 02

  Okay, here we go again.

• 1:03:15Speaker 12

  She just wanna come in, come over for a snack and go.

• 1:03:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's an attractive LP, though.

• 1:03:25Speaker 02

  He is.

• 1:03:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's got a really nice face.

• 1:03:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, and he's got a big old dong.

• 1:03:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  How do you know it's so big? How do you know?

• 1:03:30Speaker 02

  I mean, I was just looking in the.

• 1:03:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  What am I, what do we, how do you see it?

• 1:03:34Speaker 02

  I didn't see it the first time. Okay, hold on.

• 1:03:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, it's there?

• 1:03:37Speaker 02

  You're missing it. No, you're seeing the shadow, though.

• 1:03:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, whoopsie, yeah, I missed that. But don't you think you could cheat that with shadow work? Like, things look bigger?

• 1:03:47Speaker 02

  I mean, you could cheat it to an extent, but you can't make it something it's not, you know?

• 1:03:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  I didn't see the shadow.

• 1:03:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:03:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm not looking for dicks all the time like you are.

• 1:03:56Speaker 02

  Well, it's just, it's right there. I mean, I didn't have to search hard.

• 1:03:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  I was looking at his face and his delivery.

• 1:04:03Speaker 02

  You don't wanna have a little snack?

• 1:04:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  I hate you so much.

• 1:04:09Speaker 02

  All right, I'll get you something you like.

• 1:04:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  I don't like these guys.

• 1:04:13Speaker 02

  What do you not like, man? Don't you love pickles?

• 1:04:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:16Speaker 03

  I have an extreme fear of trying new foods. And today, I'm gonna try my absolute number one fear food.

• 1:04:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's gonna puke.

• 1:04:34Speaker 02

  He is hyperventilating already.

• 1:04:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, they're slimy, they're crunchy, I get it. They're seedy. Yeah. They smell weird. I like it.

• 1:04:48Speaker 02

  This fucking guy.

• 1:04:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  I could see myself.

• 1:04:51Speaker 03

  It smells so bad.

• 1:04:53Speaker 02

  So bad.

• 1:04:55Speaker 03

  It's like slimy.

• 1:04:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:04:57Speaker 03

  It's green.

• 1:04:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, it's weird.

• 1:05:02Speaker 02

  He's never.

• 1:05:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's not gonna go out.

• 1:05:06Speaker 02

  You think he's gonna do it?

• 1:05:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's gonna puke. Cause the steak he tried, it didn't have the typho negative.

• 1:05:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  And he's already.

• 1:05:19Speaker 02

  He's a mess.

• 1:05:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wow, he really hates this. Then why are you doing this to yourself? You don't have to eat a pickle.

• 1:05:24Speaker 02

  You gotta, you gotta make content.

• 1:05:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  There's no nutritional value here.

• 1:05:30Speaker 03

  One.

• 1:05:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Do it. You can do it.

• 1:05:39Speaker 03

  I can't do it.

• 1:05:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, you pussy. He's definitely not Eastern European. You fucking bitch, just eat it.

• 1:05:47Speaker 03

  I can't do it. I can't.

• 1:05:51Speaker 02

  I mean.

• 1:05:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  Pussy.

• 1:05:52Speaker 02

  Bro, you can't even post this.

• 1:05:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, bro, that's not cool.

• 1:05:55Speaker 02

  You didn't even, you didn't fucking eat it?

• 1:05:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  At least take a little lick, like touch your tongue to it.

• 1:06:00Speaker 02

  Take a little tongue. Get your clit red.

• 1:06:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Ew.

• 1:06:05Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:06:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Cut, but I, I can see myself getting this mentally ill. Can't you?

• 1:06:11Speaker 02

  Yes, of course.

• 1:06:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:13Speaker 02

  Of course.

• 1:06:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  This, this could be me in a bad, in a bad year.

• 1:06:17Speaker 02

  In a week?

• 1:06:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  In a week, yeah. Like, I don't eat white things, I don't eat fucking.

• 1:06:21Speaker 02

  Chariots everywhere.

• 1:06:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:24Speaker 02

  What's your serial number? Yeah, I can see you doing that real soon.

• 1:06:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, yeah, but I love pickles. This is not, it wouldn't be pickles for me. It would be things like chicken. Cause I get weird about germs. Uh, tuna fish is gross.

• 1:06:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:06:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  Um, sushi, I would stop eating raw fish. It would be more about those things for me, like bacteria, getting sick.

• 1:06:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:06:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  What would your, do you think, like, how would you go?

• 1:06:50Speaker 02

  How would I go mental?

• 1:06:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, like, what would your mental illness be?

• 1:06:54Speaker 02

  Uh, reckless, like, probably isolate.

• 1:06:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Howard Hughes style.

• 1:06:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, be real isolate. Don't talk to anybody anymore. Yeah, at all.

• 1:07:05Speaker 02

  Just fucking shut the door, make it dark.

• 1:07:10Speaker 02

  Sit in the room. And then there'd be papers and shit everywhere. You'd be like, what are you doing? Like, working on some shit I'm writing? And then you just see like one letter written, like, J70 times. You're like, okay.

• 1:07:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  Are you into video games? Or are you that shut in that you're not even communicating with others on video games?

• 1:07:31Speaker 02

  I mean, I could do video games. I probably wouldn't communicate with people, though. I would just do it like without that. Yeah.

• 1:07:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  No.

• 1:07:37Speaker 02

  I could do that. But I think I would actually just get into a deeper isolation and throw the system off the roof. Yeah. Yeah.

• 1:07:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I can see myself going crazy with this food thing and then with, um, animals. Like, I can see myself adopting so many animals. I, it starts with the cats, then I need the dogs, I'm gonna get the chickens, I wanna get a goat. It's gonna be like that.

• 1:08:02Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  In a house full of animals shitting everywhere.

• 1:08:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  And, and hair everywhere in the bed and stuff. And it smells bad. And you're like, babe, I can't, I can't.

• 1:08:12Speaker 02

  Yeah. You as cat lady? That could be a thing.

• 1:08:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Cat lady, dog lady.

• 1:08:17Speaker 02

  Lady, yeah.

• 1:08:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's just all the animals, birds, shit everywhere.

• 1:08:21Speaker 02

  Piss and shit all over the house.

• 1:08:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  That, that would be my thing.

• 1:08:24Speaker 02

  These are my babies.

• 1:08:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  A hundred percent.

• 1:08:26Speaker 02

  Fuck, yeah.

• 1:08:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, that's my problem.

• 1:08:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, yeah. You're the opposite, see, cause I, I want the companionship and love. You want isolation.

• 1:08:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, no human contact. Yes. I could see that.

• 1:08:47Speaker 02

  This is horrible hilarious. Are you ready?

• 1:08:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah buddy.

• 1:08:50Speaker 02

  I'm so excited. I haven't seen any of these.

• 1:08:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh fuck. Oh fuck!

• 1:09:01Speaker 02

  Oh, he's holding on. He's... Bro, that car's going like 40... Holy shit!

• 1:09:11Speaker 02

  That's where it ends?

• 1:09:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  What? Did his hand get stuck in the window? In the door?

• 1:09:18Speaker 02

  Holy shit.

• 1:09:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh my fucking god, dude.

• 1:09:22Speaker 02

  There were no further reports on the incident. It was never found. Um, NYPD getting involved. Holy shit, that's in Queens.

• 1:09:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Please, let's see it again. Let's see the beginning.

• 1:09:31Speaker 02

  I don't know if he got stuck or he held on.

• 1:09:35Speaker 02

  He's yelling.

• 1:09:42Speaker 02

  Yeah. Smart to pull the feet up. That was smart. Oh my fucking god.

• 1:09:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  He was just holding on to the door handle?

• 1:09:53Speaker 02

  I mean, I think his hand was on the inside, but...

• 1:09:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fuck.

• 1:09:57Speaker 02

  That's wild. That could... I mean, that must have ended okay, actually.

• 1:10:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:03Speaker 02

  And that guy probably stopped. Because if he didn't, if that guy just went flying, that would just be well-known, I feel like, you know?

• 1:10:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, like, he would have lost his legs already at this feet. That's pretty gnarly.

• 1:10:14Speaker 02

  That was nuts. That was a good one!

• 1:10:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  That was a good one.

• 1:10:16Speaker 02

  I'm awake now.

• 1:10:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I don't... Yeah.

• 1:10:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh shit.

• 1:10:23Speaker 02

  Holy shit.

• 1:10:30Speaker 02

  You get what happened there?

• 1:10:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes, she landed on her fucking ankle.

• 1:10:34Speaker 02

  No, no, but like...

• 1:10:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Her leg twisted because she went to box the thing. I don't like it. It's not funny.

• 1:10:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's a freak accident.

• 1:10:43Speaker 02

  That could be broken. I don't know if it's broken or not.

• 1:10:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's broken.

• 1:10:46Speaker 02

  You think it's broken?

• 1:10:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's broken.

• 1:10:48Speaker 02

  Imagine that from like what happened. It's just the torque. The torque of doing it, she missed. She didn't make contact and then that just spun her around. And she either broke it or severely sprained it.

• 1:11:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:00Speaker 02

  Well, she'll be all right.

• 1:11:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Horrible.

• 1:11:03Speaker 02

  She'll be okay.

• 1:11:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. It's like at a kid's place, too. This is like fucking Ruben Air or horse shit. Uh oh.

• 1:11:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  The lights flickered on that one.

• 1:11:19Speaker 02

  Oh my God. I thought we were gonna see someone disembowel.

• 1:11:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Me too. That was cool.

• 1:11:23Speaker 02

  This is a new level.

• 1:11:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dude, and he touched his stomach like, I just made that? Let's see.

• 1:11:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fuck.

• 1:11:33Speaker 02

  Yeah, he just checked himself out. Like, are my intestines still inside?

• 1:11:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  That was a lucky day, bro.

• 1:11:39Speaker 02

  Holy fuck.

• 1:11:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dude, buy a Lotto ticket. That's

• 1:11:42Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 1:11:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  That, he just saw his whole life flash before his eyes. Dude, that was like a fucking near-death experience.

• 1:11:50Speaker 02

  Holy shit.

• 1:11:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can you imagine going through that?

• 1:11:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I'd have to take like the, the week off.

• 1:11:56Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:11:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  And just sit in the room like, what?

• 1:11:58Speaker 02

  I wouldn't be able to pick that thing up again. I'd be like, no, somebody else do this.

• 1:12:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  New career.

• 1:12:03Speaker 02

  Fucking incredible.

• 1:12:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  That was gnarly. I thought he was gonna cut, slice himself in half for sure.

• 1:12:08Speaker 02

  This is something about the world today, though, that I think about sometimes. Is that the only people that would handle something like that 20 plus years ago would be somebody like very highly trained in doing that? And in today's world, you can just be like, I want a bandsaw. And people are like, yeah, just fucking, there you go.

• 1:12:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, oh yeah.

• 1:12:28Speaker 02

  And then you go, I got it. And you go, uh, ChatGPT, how do I do that? And then people just like, look up, they go, I know how to do this. And so you have a lot more occurrences, I think, of, you know, tool accidents. Because people have access to them now.

• 1:12:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Right.

• 1:12:42Speaker 02

  We didn't used to have access to everything.

• 1:12:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, these are uninformed.

• 1:12:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, this guy doesn't know what the fuck he's doing.

• 1:12:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  No.

• 1:12:48Speaker 02

  There's no chance. I thought he was gonna spray. I thought there was shit spraying on the wall, but.

• 1:12:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's trying to slice tile, bro.

• 1:12:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, that.

• 1:12:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  With that thing.

• 1:12:56Speaker 02

  He didn't know what he's doing.

• 1:12:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  And he's light, too.

• 1:12:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:12:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  He didn't have enough weight on him to push that thing. Oh, shit.

• 1:13:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dude, fuck this. Fuck this. I would never, he never catch me doing this shit.

• 1:13:13Speaker 02

  I found the thing I don't like.

• 1:13:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. What is this?

• 1:13:17Speaker 02

  I don't like it.

• 1:13:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  Spool rolling?

• 1:13:18Speaker 02

  I don't like necks and backs breaking.

• 1:13:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, bro.

• 1:13:22Speaker 02

  That, that was awful.

• 1:13:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  How does it start again?

• 1:13:25Speaker 02

  I don't care and I'm not showing it again.

• 1:13:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  Come on!

• 1:13:27Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:13:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  They're trying to roll in like the table spool thing?

• 1:13:30Speaker 02

  This is like at a fair.

• 1:13:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fuck that, dude.

• 1:13:33Speaker 02

  Oh, I love aftermath, no update.

• 1:13:37Speaker 02

  Okay. Phew. Yeah, she could be, I think we just saw like three or four vertebrae just go.

• 1:13:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  Please, just.

• 1:13:45Speaker 02

  Oh, fucking fine!

• 1:13:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just let me see how they, what's, what went wrong in the. Oh!

• 1:13:57Speaker 02

  And fun music? Hey, you wanna see someone get paralyzed?

• 1:14:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  For people just listening, she folded over on herself. Her, her front, her hands went on the floor and then she fucking folded over on herself.

• 1:14:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:14:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dinner, ninner, ninner.

• 1:14:19Speaker 02

  I'm so upset right now.

• 1:14:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wow.

• 1:14:23Speaker 02

  Fuck, I need something to.

• 1:14:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  That sucks, dude.

• 1:14:26Speaker 02

  I'm Ryan and I wanna be recognized by some of the hottest women here on Instagram. So, spread the word.

• 1:14:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  You got it, Ryan.

• 1:14:35Speaker 02

  Hey, there it is, right there. That's what we need to do. Can you, everybody who watches knows at least a hottie, one or two hotties on Instagram. Why don't you let them know to acknowledge Ryan?

• 1:14:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Please, somebody.

• 1:14:49Speaker 02

  Give him a little acknowledgement.

• 1:14:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  He wants to meet the hottest women. Are you the hottest women? Meet Ryan.

• 1:14:53Speaker 02

  Meet Ryan. He wants a big ass in his face. Don't you like doing that stuff?

• 1:14:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, dude.

• 1:14:58Speaker 02

  Come on.

• 1:14:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Give Ryan some love.

• 1:14:59Speaker 02

  Meet him, love him. Do it. Jesus Christ. So upsetting.

• 1:15:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 1:15:08Speaker 02

  Fucking so mad right now.

• 1:15:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  About that video still?

• 1:15:11Speaker 02

  Yes, I fucking hate it.

• 1:15:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 1:15:13Speaker 02

  Ugh.

• 1:15:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, it's not good.

• 1:15:16Speaker 02

  I had it, I love it. Were you reading?

• 1:15:21Speaker 13

  My mother for real is jury.

• 1:15:24Speaker 13

  Poor father, father is embarrassed, embarrassed. They trying to say you embarrassed me and some shit.

• 1:15:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's a shit.

• 1:15:32Speaker 13

  I put jury on my side.

• 1:15:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Jury, jury.

• 1:15:36Speaker 02

  What is the relationship of this father and son, you think?

• 1:15:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's good.

• 1:15:41Speaker 02

  But.

• 1:15:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's positive.

• 1:15:42Speaker 02

  I mean, the father had to go to like a certain levels of acceptance, right?

• 1:15:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  I mean.

• 1:15:47Speaker 02

  He's not like, oh, yeah, come meet Todd. He's a regular kid.

• 1:15:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, there's, there's two scenarios. Dad was absent during Todd's childhood. Or Todd just came out mentally ill.

• 1:15:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, and he's just been used to it.

• 1:16:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's just like over, fucking Todd.

• 1:16:02Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 1:16:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Um. God, this look is really outrageous. I do like the look, though.

• 1:16:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:16:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  I don't know. I'm gonna go with Todd just came out messed up because dad's still a part of his life right now.

• 1:16:15Speaker 02

  So I think he's doing a character maybe too, right? This could be, this could be a character thing. In this day and age where people just

• 1:16:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:21Speaker 02

  understand that like if you do something outrageous, you might get a following. Maybe he's not really like this 24/7. I mean, he did say father correctly and then goes, I mean, father.

• 1:16:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, right, right, yeah.

• 1:16:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:16:37Speaker 02

  It's, I don't know.

• 1:16:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  I wonder if the tats are real.

• 1:16:39Speaker 13

  My mother ain't embarrassed. I'm smart. Like, who the fuck, look, all this art, um, art, art is on my face, though. You feel me? Like, real shit, though, like, you know what I'm saying? My dad, bro, he love me.

• 1:16:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:52Speaker 13

  Y'all trying to break up families and shit. That's fucked up. You know what I'm saying? Twin, tap in, I got motion. You feel me? I'm a mother.

• 1:16:59Speaker 02

  Mother.

• 1:17:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is those two, those twins started this, right?

• 1:17:02Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:17:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Those.

• 1:17:03Speaker 02

  That look?

• 1:17:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  That Florida shit?

• 1:17:05Speaker 02

  What were they, the Island Boys?

• 1:17:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  The Island Boys.

• 1:17:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:17:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is the Island Boy look?

• 1:17:09Speaker 02

  I mean, kind of.

• 1:17:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, and then they talk the same way.

• 1:17:14Speaker 02

  Are this kid's tats real, though? Doesn't something about them kind of read false to you?

• 1:17:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:17:19Speaker 02

  They are real?

• 1:17:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  They look, they don't look real to me, but I'm not a tattoo expert.

• 1:17:24Speaker 02

  I mean, he's

• 1:17:27Speaker 02

  he's fucking nuts, bro.

• 1:17:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, this guy's got mental problems.

• 1:17:30Speaker 02

  So what is, like, pull up one of those. What's he talking about?

• 1:17:36Speaker 13

  Change, I'mma do something.

• 1:17:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's crazy.

• 1:17:41Speaker 13

  My real toe, damn on my name, test on my body, mother. Bruh, if y'all keep calling my loss and fight change, I'mma do something.

• 1:17:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, Todd came out this way, babe.

• 1:17:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, he might have been, yeah.

• 1:17:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wires are crossed.

• 1:17:54Speaker 02

  No, I'm proud of you. See? You, you, you, you, you, you, and you.

• 1:18:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:03Speaker 02

  See, that's a normal voice. Tap into an emotional. Yeah.

• 1:18:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. Nah, nobody's born talking like that.

• 1:18:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:18:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:11Speaker 02

  Uh, you know, my pop, my pop, you know what I'm saying? My father loved me, man.

• 1:18:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  I do like. I did, that's a chola girl.

• 1:18:19Speaker 02

  That chola girl, yeah. I want him to be a.

• 1:18:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm about to get, nah, she's.

• 1:18:26Speaker 02

  Oh, look, he's with his dad there. You see that? His dad's so tired.

• 1:18:30Speaker 13

  Was I ever in detention in school? Yep. Uh, see, that, that the reason why I look like that. I'm a mother too much. I'm a in there, you ain't never been in trouble in your life. You ain't never done anything, even went past a green light, you went red.

• 1:18:43Speaker 02

  I'll tell you this, though.

• 1:18:46Speaker 02

  That dad has a, he dissociates and he also is patient. But every once in a while, he goes, cut the fucking shit, Wyatt.

• 1:18:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's got to.

• 1:18:55Speaker 02

  Stop talking like that.

• 1:18:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's got to.

• 1:18:57Speaker 02

  And then Wyatt goes like, alright dad, Jesus Christ, he got so mad. I just, can I borrow another? Five grand to get a change?

• 1:19:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is such a bad, I mean, and you can't even lock these, these fools up anymore.

• 1:19:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:19:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know what I'm saying? You can't, you can't just give them to a mental hospital and be like, just lock Todd up for his own safety.

• 1:19:17Speaker 02

  First of all, he needs a following, but you can't get, you can't employ him anywhere.

• 1:19:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, this guy's fucked.

• 1:19:21Speaker 02

  What are you gonna do? Like, you can't do a job.

• 1:19:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's done. No, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta put these people in.

• 1:19:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, he could work in a warehouse, you know?

• 1:19:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Maybe, but he wants too much attention.

• 1:19:32Speaker 02

  Of course.

• 1:19:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  He can't.

• 1:19:33Speaker 02

  And everyone would be like, could you just fucking stack those boxes, please? Yeah.

• 1:19:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, this kid has a lot of needs.

• 1:19:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:19:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  I would be so bummed if one of ours.

• 1:19:43Speaker 02

  Well, good luck.

• 1:19:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Good luck.

• 1:19:46Speaker 02

  In what you have.

• 1:19:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  What is with the baby?

• 1:19:48Speaker 02

  With your music.

• 1:19:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  No. I hope he's making music at least.

• 1:19:52Speaker 02

  He's making music, yeah.

• 1:19:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, good, okay.

• 1:19:54Speaker 02

  I'm sure it's.

• 1:19:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  There you go.

• 1:19:55Speaker 02

  It's probably really good.

• 1:19:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Never know.

• 1:19:58Speaker 02

  All right, let's wrap this shit up. We got things to do.

• 1:20:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, shit.

• 1:20:01Speaker 02

  Thanks for watching. Thanks for listening. We will see you next week.

• 1:20:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  My mommy.

• 1:20:06Speaker 02

  Bye.

• 1:20:06Speaker 14

  I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass Serious response only

• 1:20:14Speaker 14

  Um, and they know how to work it I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass Serious response only I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass And they know how to work it I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass Serious response only I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass

• 1:20:58Speaker 14

  And they know how to work it I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass Serious response only I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass And they know how to work it I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass

• 1:21:28Speaker 14

  I'm looking for a white girl with a fat ass Serious

• 1:21:45Speaker 05

  New and exclusive holiday decor just launched online at The Home Depot. Check out the viral Grand Duchess Collection with smart holiday lights you can control from your phone. Easily customize the twinkle across trees, wreaths, and garlands to match your holiday vibe. Create stunning light effects, then switch it up with the tap of your fingers. Even the man in red will be impressed. Shop the holiday decor you want, online only, at HomeDepot.com.