Dumbest Shark Tank Pitches w/ Mark Cuban | Your Mom's House Ep. 802

Get tickets for Tom’s Come Together Tour at https://tomsegura.com/tour Interested in learning more about Mark Cuban's company? Visit http://CostPlusDrugs.com to find out more! SPONSORS: Check out the full lineup and get 15 percent off your first order at https://TRUEWERK.com/ymh. Go to https://shopify.com/momshouse to upgrade your selling today. Secure your online data TODAY by visiting https://ExpressVPN.com/ymh Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/mom or through my promo code MOM. This week on Your Mom’s House, Robert Smith and Christina P are joined by billionaire entrepreneur and Shark Tank legend Mark Cuban. Tom and Christina are STILL hyped after YMH Live X and recap more of the insanity from that legendary night. Tom next opens the show with an unhinged clip of an old man who hasn't been laid in 30 years, before he brings up his tradition of texting Joe Rogan horrifying death videos. Other highlights include a Hulk Hogan steamer situation, a bizarre Kanye tattoo on an Asian guy, and a deep dive into Charles Manson documentaries. The one and only Mark Cuban joins the pod, and things get real. Mark opens up about selling the Mavericks, what it’s like to trade a generational talent like Luka Dončić, and why checking his bank account makes everything better. He spills secret rich guy knowledge (like how money makes ugly people attractive), explains why he’s not a yacht guy, and hilariously pitches Tom on buying a private jet. Mark also talks about being a public dad, his love for working, and why he’s obsessed with the future. He breaks down Shark Tank—from the dumbest pitches ever to surprising success stories like Dude Wipes—and how he’s wrong half the time when investing. The conversation gets even wilder as Mark shares thoughts on hunting Somali pirates, his late-night Twitter beefs, AI, NBA rule changes, and why he’s all-in on healthcare reform with http://CostPlusDrugs.com. Don’t miss it, Jeans! Your Mom’s House Ep. 802 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit http://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org (CT) or visit http://www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: http://dkng.co/dk-offer-terms. Ends 3/30/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Pick6 not available everywhere, including, but not limited to NY and CA-ONT (for up-to-date list of jurisdictions please visit pick6.draftkings.com/where-is-pick6-available). Sponsored by DK. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:03:29 - YMH Live X Still Got Us Hyped 00:10:19 - Opening Clip: Hard Time Getting Hard 00:17:15 - Heavy Reactions 00:21:07 - Deep Diving The Opening Clip 00:24:52 - Clip: A Hulk Hogan Steamer 00:28:33 - Christina P Trashes Meghan M 00:42:48 - Clip: Decent Footjob Review 00:44:49 - Clip: Cool Kanye Tattoo 00:45:39 - Charles Manson 00:53:56 - Mark Cuban Talks Mavs & Luka Doncic 01:00:42 - Secret Rich Guy Stuff 01:08:31 - How To Win At The Sport Of Business 01:14:51 - Dumb Shark Tank Pitches 01:22:33 - Putting Your Kids On The Right Path 01:28:22 - Personal Stuff & Somali Pirates 01:34:31 - AI & The Future Of Podcasts 01:43:01 - Changing The Game 01:47:45 - Mark Cuban's Favorite Things 01:55:47 - Closing Song - "Pussy Glassin" by Lady Money Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Tom Segura?

  I'm excited to come back to Atlantic City this June. I'll be at the Hard Rock Live at the Arena on Friday, June 20th, and Saturday, June 21st. Pre-sale tickets are live now with the code TOMMY, T-O-M-M-Y. The rest of my UK tour dates are also this week. I'll be in London tomorrow, Nottingham and Cardiff this weekend. Get your tickets at tomscare.com/tour. Thank you, and I'll see you guys there.

• 0:24Speaker 01

  Welcome, welcome to Your Mom's House.

• 0:33Tom Segura?

  I mean, I really did first see you sitting at the stoopa outside the cat club. That is the first time I saw you.

• 0:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  You remember, you do remember that story.

• 0:43Tom Segura?

  Oh, yeah, of course I remember that, yeah.

• 0:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  You always say I look like a hooker, but I didn't really look like a hooker.

• 0:48Tom Segura?

  It's not that you look like one, it's that I thought you were one.

• 0:53Tom Segura?

  You had on fishnets, knee-high boots, you were smoking a cigarette. You were kind of like, I've been out here, I've been working, what's going on?

• 0:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Did not say that.

• 1:00Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, so then, so then you go, but you knew that I was dating a guy?

• 1:05Tom Segura?

  No, I didn't know right away, obviously. You know, I was trying to like, I was like, she's cute, playing it cool.

• 1:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:11Tom Segura?

  Right, and then...

• 1:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I talk to you for a second?

• 1:14Tom Segura?

  I was like, let me talk to you for a second. And then...

• 1:19Tom Segura?

  Yeah, I just remember, I probably didn't figure, I mean, I can't remember exactly. I didn't find out that night, but it's one of those things where, you know, after we met...

• 1:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Through the grapevine.

• 1:30Tom Segura?

  Kind of either heard it through the grapevine, or you go to,

• 1:36Tom Segura?

  I don't know, do spots, and you're like, oh, what's going on with her? And then somebody mentioned. And I always had that thing too, where it's like, somebody's seeing someone, you're just like, okay, like, you know.

• 1:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're done?

• 1:47Tom Segura?

  Yeah, you're just accept, so it actually probably made us...

• 1:53Tom Segura?

  More like just coworkers, right? Like.

• 1:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 1:57Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  It forced you to get to see me as a person, not just blonde hair and tits a little bit.

• 2:02Tom Segura?

  Right, and I always feel like that's so, like, I hate

• 2:06Tom Segura?

  honestly, seeing women as people.

• 2:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 2:08Tom Segura?

  Cause I've never really thought of them that way.

• 2:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, they're kind of stupid, right?

• 2:12Tom Segura?

  Yeah, and also, it's like, you know.

• 2:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 2:15Tom Segura?

  You guys were kind of made for one thing and one thing only, I feel like.

• 2:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  What's that?

• 2:19Tom Segura?

  I think it's pretty obvious.

• 2:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  I think three, three, cooking, cleaning.

• 2:23Tom Segura?

  Those are, I'm not really one of those guys. That's like, you gotta clean for, you got, like, I don't.

• 2:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know that.

• 2:29Tom Segura?

  It's nice that you do, but like, it's, it's really just be a jizz receptacle, you know?

• 2:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's your number one priority. I do though, I do know this about you.

• 2:37Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 2:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  Coming and eating are your priorities.

• 2:40Tom Segura?

  Yeah, and I'll figure out the eating on my own, so. The, the main thing is, you know, what's that tits hitch like? And what that mouth do?

• 2:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Right. Well, I did, when I met you, I had the best pair of tits. I had such good tits, cause I wasn't like fat, I didn't have kids. They were so good when we met.

• 3:00Tom Segura?

  No, your tits were out.

• 3:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  You got, you got my tits at prime titty time.

• 3:04Tom Segura?

  It's prime time tits, for sure.

• 3:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  And then, and then kids, cancer, but guess what? In August, I'm gonna have my deep flap, they're gonna reconstruct my tits out of my belly fat. I'm gonna have a tummy tuck and new tits, you can choose, we can sit down and choose the tits of our dreams.

• 3:19Tom Segura?

  What do you think I'm dreaming about when I go to sleep at night?

• 3:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  These new tits?

• 3:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Uh, it's stupid.

• 3:26Tom Segura?

  Nah, but I, uh.

• 3:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  So fuck is stupid, huh?

• 3:29Tom Segura?

  Yeah, you know, oh, I guess I should probably, there's people watching who don't know, who are like, what the fuck is going on with this guy's face?

• 3:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  They get so upset.

• 3:37Tom Segura?

  They get so upset.

• 3:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  They get so bummed out when you're shaved.

• 3:40Tom Segura?

  I know.

• 3:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like, I'm just looking at a picture I posted of us on Instagram, and they're just, all the comments are like, Tom's face, boo.

• 3:47Tom Segura?

  It's offensive.

• 3:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 3:49Tom Segura?

  It's honestly offensive to me.

• 3:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  So hurtful.

• 3:51Tom Segura?

  Yeah, it's like.

• 3:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  So hurtful.

• 3:53Tom Segura?

  Come on, it's not that bad.

• 3:56Tom Segura?

  So what happened was, we did a live show, YMH Live 10. At this point, it's two weeks ago. So if you, you know, you saw last week's show, that was actually before we recorded, so it's been two weeks.

• 4:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 4:13Tom Segura?

  It was, and I don't think I'm exaggerating, not only the most fun for us, but I think clearly the best live show we've ever done.

• 4:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Hands down the best.

• 4:21Tom Segura?

  It was fucking awesome.

• 4:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Everything went so perfectly. The comedy, the sketches were bangers. Dan Soder, perfect guest.

• 4:29Tom Segura?

  The best.

• 4:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Couldn't have been better. You, by the way, were the ball, the belle of the ball.

• 4:35Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 4:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  May I, we all know, Tom was Robert Smith of the Cure, and I could not take my eyes off of you.

• 4:41Tom Segura?

  If you're not aware of what happened, if you're like, what's, what is this?

• 4:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 4:45Tom Segura?

  It's that I had, I committed to the idea of being your fantasy.

• 4:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  It was amazing.

• 4:51Tom Segura?

  On the live show.

• 4:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  I loved it.

• 4:53Tom Segura?

  Who is Robert Smith of the Cure?

• 4:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  God, you looked so good. I couldn't stop staring at him. Look how happy I am. I loved it. You know what the best part is? We were getting ready for the show and you were talking to the team.

• 5:04Tom Segura?

  Mm-hmm.

• 5:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  And I was like, oh my God, Robert Smith's here. Like, I loved it. You looked so good. Look how bummed out you are, too. It's so good.

• 5:11Tom Segura?

  I was trying to be his, you know.

• 5:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 5:15Tom Segura?

  Depressed, regular kinda.

• 5:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh my God, Robert Smith, are you so happy to be inducted in the Hall of Fame?

• 5:21Tom Segura?

  Not as excited as you, apparently.

• 5:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  So good.

• 5:25Tom Segura?

  He said later that he felt bad about that.

• 5:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  Did he?

• 5:28Tom Segura?

  Yeah, he said that he didn't realize he was being video recorded. So he was just kinda like, and he was like, he felt bad that it was like, seen as really shitty to her.

• 5:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 5:38Tom Segura?

  Yeah, he felt bad.

• 5:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I think he's a decent dude. I've never heard anything bad about Robert Smith.

• 5:42Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 5:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Never. He just, he likes being a musician. They have a good band.

• 5:46Tom Segura?

  I don't know anything about him.

• 5:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  I do, I know a lot. He's been married to the same woman, Mary Poole, since they were like 20 something years old.

• 5:54Tom Segura?

  Mm-hmm.

• 5:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  They live in Sussex, or he's from Sussex. Oh, there we are.

• 6:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  Tommy Scissorhands, look at me, I love it.

• 6:04Tom Segura?

  Yeah, well, we'll get into all this. It really was the, it was the best, dude.

• 6:11Tom Segura?

  We've done 10 YMH lives, which is also a huge accomplishment.

• 6:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 6:16Tom Segura?

  You know?

• 6:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  It really is.

• 6:18Tom Segura?

  But it's been a while and really wanted to do another one because it's just so much fun. This one had like everything out of 10. And that's why, and I think for me primarily the thing that makes you go, this was so great. It's that the, the pre-recorded bits were such bangers, like they really were. Charo with Alexis Fox on doing an, introducing the OnlyFans was amazing.

• 6:47Tom Segura?

  Charo had no idea that the things that were there were the things that they were. And then I, I just can't say enough about it. The Tony John's dating.

• 6:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh my god.

• 7:00Tom Segura?

  Bachelor kind of show that we did, unbelievable.

• 7:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, you guys don't even realize how crazy that was filming it with him. I wish we could show the, like, the hours of footage of him being a lunatic. And then don't forget, live on the show, Alexis Fox.

• 7:17Tom Segura?

  I know, it, it.

• 7:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's crazy.

• 7:18Tom Segura?

  And that was magical. That was a magical, I mean, I feel like that's what like took it over the top.

• 7:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fucking insane.

• 7:25Tom Segura?

  If that had not happened, I still think it was like just incredible. But that took it to a whole other level that Alexis was watching, heard us talking to Tony Johns about his desire to enter the adult industry. And then she was like, yeah.

• 7:43Tom Segura?

  She was like, I'll do it. It was just insane.

• 7:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Magical. And I broke my sobriety. I haven't had alcohol 90 days. I had to drink during the heavy segment. That's how good that segment was. Oh, look at them.

• 7:55Tom Segura?

  She's, she loves, she loves Alexis.

• 7:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh yeah. Who doesn't though? She's so sweet.

• 8:00Tom Segura?

  Oh my god.

• 8:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, the whistler.

• 8:01Tom Segura?

  Ralph the Whistler? He had multiple whistling bits and then his off mic stuff. Talking about storming the Capitol and there's nowhere to piss and just like crazy conspiracy shit. It was unbelievable, dude.

• 8:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 8:17Tom Segura?

  And then of course, his whistling is just.

• 8:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's phenomenal.

• 8:19Tom Segura?

  There's nobody better.

• 8:22Tom Segura?

  Then we played our short film for her.

• 8:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yep.

• 8:25Tom Segura?

  That people really responded to. It was a touching tribute to my father.

• 8:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yep.

• 8:31Tom Segura?

  And then.

• 8:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  Danielle Pineda.

• 8:33Tom Segura?

  Danielle Pineda was in that. Ryan Sickler was in that. Yeah.

• 8:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  There she is. Gosh, she's so thoroughly talented. It's upsetting.

• 8:41Tom Segura?

  When you make, so I've made multiple shorts. When you get real actors, like serious actors in something, it actually makes you realize like, oh, this is why in features, like when you go like, why are movie stars like paid something? They elevate the thing so much. Like our silly little idea just takes on a whole new thing when you have a really good actor in it.

• 9:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, she's got to say some absurd lines and deliver them sincerely. It's very hard. So it's a fine line she has to walk to make it believable and funny and everything. It's really.

• 9:19Tom Segura?

  No, she can do it all. She's, she's.

• 9:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's amazing.

• 9:21Tom Segura?

  She's coming, she has a big movie coming out, I think, uh, next month or this month.

• 9:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Amazing. Yeah. Yeah. It was just bangers, dude.

• 9:29Tom Segura?

  The Accountant Two. Yeah. She's gonna be in The Accountant Two.

• 9:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  Just bangers. This, this, this YMH, you and I were, were buzzing for days after we recorded YMH Live. I couldn't sleep that night. I was so jazzed about how it all went.

• 9:43Tom Segura?

  Yeah, it was.

• 9:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh my God, and Soder was like, perfect. Will Blunderfield did his thing. Duncan Trussell, our own Tanner in the.

• 9:51Tom Segura?

  Tanner.

• 9:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's so good.

• 9:54Tom Segura?

  Duncan and Tanner pissing together in a cup.

• 9:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  God damn.

• 9:58Tom Segura?

  Yeah, the Will Blunderfield thing was amazing.

• 10:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Everything. Oh, there we are, watching Heavy.

• 10:04Tom Segura?

  Not really watching that. Yeah, Dan was, Dan, it got to him. He was like, I'm fine. This is good. And then he was like, oh God. We'll get to that. We'll get to those in a second. Um, why don't we open the show and then we'll get to our favorite.

• 10:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  So much to talk about.

• 10:24Tom Segura?

  Okay. He.

• 10:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Here you go.

• 10:30Speaker 03

  We were in bed and I guess, you know, I'll just be honest with you. I buried my face in her vagina.

• 10:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay.

• 10:38Speaker 03

  She didn't shave and that's what I wanted. And I basically.

• 10:44Speaker 03

  Suck this woman's pussy for an hour and a half. An hour and a half.

• 10:51Speaker 03

  And I loved every fucking minute of it. But I mean, just I didn't let nothing go.

• 10:58Speaker 03

  Of course, she did the same to me. And of course, I had a hard time getting her.

• 11:57Tom Segura?

  You know that Rogan texts me almost every day? And there's no words. It's always just somebody dying.

• 12:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's real friendship.

• 12:09Tom Segura?

  I know. We don't like real like sometimes we have back and forth. Words. But 95% of the time it's links.

• 12:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know. He and I have the same relationship. We send each other TikToks and various clips.

• 12:25Tom Segura?

  Let's see what today's is. I'm trying to see.

• 12:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I tell you something? That's how I knew that Joe was thinking of me when I was sick. Can I talk to you for a second? He would send me like all these cancer memes. It was really like cancer articles and stuff. He's very thoughtful. Very sweet. And then he'd send me funny shit.

• 12:45Tom Segura?

  It's really like-

• 12:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Of like, you know, transitioning people.

• 12:48Tom Segura?

  It is the mark of a friendship.

• 12:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  It is. It is. He and I, we send each other, yeah, ridiculous shit.

• 12:54Tom Segura?

  It's usually just somebody dying.

• 12:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Not with me. They don't, nobody sends me death. I'm into like the gender people, you know, like pronoun people being ridiculous. That's, that's our jam.

• 13:06Tom Segura?

  Our videos are usually either a street fight that ends up with head trauma, shootings, stabbings, war videos, trains hitting cars, people.

• 13:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. That's cool.

• 13:18Tom Segura?

  Yeah, explosions, yeah. Yeah, a lot of stuff like that. It's pretty-

• 13:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's a real friendship.

• 13:25Tom Segura?

  Real friendship.

• 13:26Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 15:36Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 16:04Tom Segura?

  And it cuts off.

• 16:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's it?

• 16:05Tom Segura?

  That's why I was like, oh, there's gotta be, there's obviously more to this video.

• 16:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, explain yourself, sir.

• 16:09Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 16:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  Why, of course, he seemed pretty jazzed. Was he hard for an hour and a half?

• 16:13Speaker 03

  Sucked this woman's pussy for an hour and a half.

• 16:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is he, was he hard for too long, maybe?

• 16:19Tom Segura?

  I don't know.

• 16:19Speaker 03

  And I loved every fucking minute of it.

• 16:21Tom Segura?

  There's, there's more to this video.

• 16:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 16:23Tom Segura?

  Yeah. Do we know where it is? Let me see if I can pull up the original. Okay.

• 16:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  By the way, see the how he decorates his apartment? This is how I decorated our first house.

• 16:32Tom Segura?

  Yeah, of course.

• 16:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Remember?

• 16:34Tom Segura?

  This is how everyone's apartment looks when you're like out of college, except he's, you know, 67. It's crazy. He's got, he's just got work shit and mail on a desk.

• 16:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is how I decorate though.

• 16:47Tom Segura?

  A couple boxes. Yeah, though this is, I think he strums a guitar. That's pretty cool.

• 16:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 16:52Tom Segura?

  You should put something up there.

• 16:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Something up there. You need artwork. It really helps the vibe.

• 16:57Tom Segura?

  Okay, so here's, um.

• 16:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Guys, buy my lipsticks before we move any further.

• 17:01Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 17:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'd like to plug it. Robert Smith was wearing the perfect red on YMH Live 10, because it is indeed the most perfect shade. I'm wearing it today. I have Atomic Red, Madison, and Berlin. Buy them all. Christina P.com.

• 17:15Tom Segura?

  This was the favorite thing of, that I always have said I love about the live show. Is getting, my favorite thing about the heavy segment is not the heavy segment. It's watching people watch the heavy segment.

• 17:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Same.

• 17:32Tom Segura?

  So whenever we play the heavy segment, we get these videos that get sent in of reactions.

• 17:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  I love them.

• 17:37Tom Segura?

  Of people who are doing like watch parties and stuff.

• 17:40Speaker 04

  I've never done a YMH live before and I've only heard the lore of the heavy segment. And I'm excited to finally see it because I don't think, I don't think it's gonna get me. No, please, please, no!

• 17:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  That was the worst one.

• 17:58Tom Segura?

  That was bad.

• 17:59Speaker 04

  Oh my god, I think I'm gonna pass out.

• 18:03Tom Segura?

  That was gnarly, dude.

• 18:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  That was a guy's ankle literally snapping off of his leg. Like it just came right off.

• 18:09Tom Segura?

  Skin and everything, that was insanity. Which was actually, it wasn't even in our heavy bank of clips, it was, it was in our other clip bank.

• 18:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  That was like a sorbet?

• 18:19Tom Segura?

  Yeah, it was supposed to cleanse the palate.

• 18:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  From genital stuff?

• 18:23Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 18:25Speaker 04

  Oh my god!

• 18:38Speaker 04

  Oh my god!

• 18:41Speaker 04

  I can't.

• 18:42Tom Segura?

  That's the best.

• 18:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is awful.

• 18:43Tom Segura?

  I love this stuff, man.

• 18:47Tom Segura?

  I love people with pillows and blankets over their eyes.

• 18:54Tom Segura?

  I'm this guy.

• 18:57Speaker 04

  I wasn't done, you're listening, why are you fucking done?

• 19:02Tom Segura?

  I love it, dude. I love it. Look at her face.

• 19:11Speaker 04

  Poop, poop, it's poop. It's poop, she's eating the poop.

• 19:20Speaker 04

  Ew, ew, ew, ew.

• 19:24Tom Segura?

  No.

• 19:24Speaker 04

  What the fuck?

• 19:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, it's so gnarly.

• 19:31Tom Segura?

  Look at the cat.

• 19:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  The cat is like, what? What is it?

• 19:35Tom Segura?

  Oh, it's so bad.

• 19:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fuck, dude.

• 19:37Tom Segura?

  And then even here, in the office, the live show was streaming into the conference room, which had like 20 people in it. And Alan was like, I have to watch it. Like, he, he, he told him he had to watch it.

• 20:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  So upset.

• 20:00Tom Segura?

  That's Alan in ad sales.

• 20:08Tom Segura?

  Ryan's got a...

• 20:11Tom Segura?

  Ryan's got his hoodie over his eyes.

• 20:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  They are not.

• 20:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Chris Lars.

• 20:21Tom Segura?

  Everybody was just mortified. But that's the fun, I mean, how do you not have fun with that? Aren't you enjoying watching that? That's the best part.

• 20:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I mean, look, the reason we do these live shows is because we can't play the good stuff on YouTube. They flag everything.

• 20:35Tom Segura?

  And it's also to bring people together, bring communities together. How does that not make you want to have a watch party? Where you set up a camera and record your friends? It's the most fun. So, anyway, huge thanks to all of you and also to the YMH staff, the crew for making that. You guys did an amazing job, each and every one of you. Thanks, man.

• 20:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, really, truly amazing work, kids.

• 21:00Tom Segura?

  It was so good. And shout out to Connor Galvin, too.

• 21:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Heavy clips were outstanding.

• 21:04Tom Segura?

  Who worked with us writing stuff.

• 21:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, yeah. What a great time. Oh, so babe, the clip is getting laid for the first time in almost 30 years.

• 21:11Tom Segura?

  Oh, that's why he... And that's why he was... Okay.

• 21:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Now it makes sense.

• 21:16Tom Segura?

  Now it makes sense why he was shit. Because I was like, why are you uploading this, bro?

• 21:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Getting laid for the first time?

• 21:23Speaker 03

  Vagina. She didn't shave, and that's what I wanted. And I basically...

• 21:31Speaker 03

  Suck this woman's pussy for an hour and a half.

• 21:34Tom Segura?

  Well, it's thirty years.

• 21:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 21:35Speaker 03

  An hour and a half.

• 21:36Tom Segura?

  He felt the need to document.

• 21:37Speaker 03

  And I loved every fucking minute of it.

• 21:39Tom Segura?

  Sure, man, congratulations.

• 21:40Speaker 03

  But, I mean, just, I didn't let nothing go.

• 21:43Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 21:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, we got it.

• 21:45Speaker 03

  Of course, she did the same to me.

• 21:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 21:47Speaker 03

  And, of course, I had a hard time getting her. And she didn't, she, she understood, but I made up for it orally.

• 21:56Tom Segura?

  Jesus.

• 21:56Speaker 03

  So I'm in this bed with this attractive woman, clean, don't have a scar on her. Don't smoke. And she, you know, it was just enjoyable. She was there to serve me. She came there and says, she says, I want to do everything that you want me to do.

• 22:12Speaker 03

  She said, I want everything, I want to do everything, and she did anything that you can think of. Every sex act imaginable.

• 22:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  You can't believe.

• 22:19Speaker 03

  Uh, you think about it, reming. Every fantasy I'd ever seen on porn. And she loved every bit of it. And she basically orgasmed, I don't know how many times on my face.

• 22:31Tom Segura?

  Yeah, tight.

• 22:33Speaker 03

  I can't believe I'm telling this video, this is what happened to me. On December the thirtieth. I'm checking my calendar again.

• 22:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Day before New Year's.

• 22:42Speaker 03

  December the thirtieth was, was just five days ago, five nights ago.

• 22:46Tom Segura?

  Oh, he, it's fresh in his mind.

• 22:47Speaker 03

  And, uh.

• 22:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  So straight faced, though, no joy.

• 22:52Speaker 03

  We went at it for an hour and a half. Couldn't have intercourse because of my problem, erectile problem.

• 22:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh.

• 22:57Speaker 03

  But she was satisfied. I was satisfied, I mean. We laid in bed for a few minutes and then she went to the restroom and came back. She, she started putting her clothes on, so I just, I knew she was ready to go. I mean, she had driven, even though I drove the greatest distance, I drove eighty-five miles, but she still says she had to drive an hour, which I don't understand, because Alfredo was supposed to only be thirty miles away. But, uh, but she came an hour, can you imagine a woman, a fifty-four-year-old woman driving an hour? To see me in a motel, to suck my you-know-what and let me eat her pussy for an hour and a half.

• 23:34Tom Segura?

  You, you already broke the you-know-what barrier, sir.

• 23:36Speaker 03

  I loved every minute of it. And.

• 23:40Speaker 03

  I was just as horny when she left as before she came, but I didn't care.

• 23:44Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 23:45Speaker 03

  Uh, that I was horny. I mean, in fact, I had met a woman, it satisfied me.

• 23:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  I can't, I got it.

• 23:50Tom Segura?

  I like that he, he, the title of this, getting laid for the first time in almost thirty years. Thoughts on Alan, Roger Curry restarting my channel? So this is what motivated him to, I guess, get a channel up and going again?

• 24:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, he's got seven hundred one subscribers. That's nothing to sneeze at. They're all eager to know. Love left me forever. Oh, hey.

• 24:12Tom Segura?

  Oh, shit. Quitting the postal service.

• 24:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, my God, this guy.

• 24:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  But this still is more entertaining than anything on television.

• 24:20Tom Segura?

  Oh, that was awesome. I mean, that was an amazing, police wellness check.

• 24:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  I like this. Ooh.

• 24:23Tom Segura?

  Oh, fuck.

• 24:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fascinating.

• 24:26Tom Segura?

  Clean anger? What the fuck is going on with this channel? Can we please do a dive on this guy at some point? Yeah, please flag that. Make that somebody's mission, please.

• 24:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  This could be the next cool guy on the wall. We don't know.

• 24:35Tom Segura?

  It was very cool. I mean, the video itself was vintage cool. It was very cool.

• 24:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  He shares this. He shares this. I mean, I can't believe.

• 24:47Tom Segura?

  You know what else is cool that I haven't had the chance to share on this show? I saw this a while ago. I didn't, I had never seen this clip.

• 24:54Speaker 01

  Well, they had, they said I had to take a steamer before I get out of here.

• 24:59Tom Segura?

  Hulk Hogan is taking a shit.

• 25:00Speaker 01

  So I've just unleashed a major toxic.

• 25:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fuck, yeah. Go for it, Hogan.

• 25:07Speaker 01

  Think the paint is starting to come off the walls.

• 25:11Tom Segura?

  I don't know the story behind this, but it's very cool. Yeah.

• 25:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm gonna watch him shit.

• 25:15Tom Segura?

  Taking a steamer.

• 25:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's cool.

• 25:18Speaker 04

  Yeah, we don't have much info on it, unfortunately.

• 25:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Nah, you don't need much. I feel like.

• 25:21Tom Segura?

  I think we get it.

• 25:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  I get it, yeah.

• 25:23Tom Segura?

  It's just, most people, you know, sort of like the last guy, you don't have to upload this, right? You can just take your, your heater, but.

• 25:33Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 26:17Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 27:00Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 27:44Christina Pazsitzky?

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• 28:04Speaker 05

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• 28:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Tom, I'd like to share something very important to me. And, look, there's a few highlights in my career, I would say.

• 28:41Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 28:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes, getting on Netflix is pretty exciting as a stand-up comedian, working on various television shows. I think the highlight of my career so far has been getting in the National Enquirer.

• 28:53Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 28:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  For the Garth Brooks stuff. And I just want to shout out Daily Mail, UK. You guys know I'm a huge Anglophile. Put out a post about a TikTok I did on Meghan Markle's new show.

• 29:09Tom Segura?

  Is that in here? Do I have that? Or you have it?

• 29:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  I am so excited. Netflix comedian Christina Bajitsky gives scathing review of Meghan Markle's new cookery show, telling fans, "She's no Martha fucking Stewart. You better believe it." Oh, they're posting it. I'm watching the new Meghan Markle.

• 29:27Tom Segura?

  Wow.

• 29:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm sorry. Meghan Sussex cooking show, craft show. I don't know what the show is. Thanks. It's perfect, Red. It's inauthentic. It's not, not fun. Is that a reason to hate it? No. No, it's not. I think, I think, I think, I don't like that she's just, she's... Here's what it is. When Martha Stewart came out with her, you know, how homekeeping type shows back in, what was it, the 90s or the 80s or whatever? I remember women being like, "Yeah, right." Like, "Who's at home making their own beeswax candles?" "Yeah, right." "Who's making their own croutons from scratch?" Well, you know who was? Martha Stewart.

• 30:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Martha Stewart was, because that's who she was. That's who she is. She was doing all this crafty stuff, even when the cameras weren't rolling.

• 30:22Tom Segura?

  That's a good point, and that is probably one of the main criticisms of, uh, Meghan is that people find it to be inauthentic.

• 30:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'll tell you something else.

• 30:32Tom Segura?

  And scroll down?

• 30:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, it's fantastic. They-

• 30:34Tom Segura?

  Oh yeah, you got a whole-

• 30:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  They could, they, they wrote such a complimentary article. And, and by the way, I'm so thrilled to be in the UK news because, let me tell you. I, you know my love of the royal family?

• 30:45Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 30:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  I, I, I-

• 30:47Tom Segura?

  Authentic.

• 30:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's authentic. I read books about these people. I'm, I'm interested. I'm not a British citizen, so I don't have the same relationship the Brits do to their monarchy.

• 30:55Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 30:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  But I'm fascinated by their system. It's existed for hundreds and hundreds of years. And I've read books about Meghan Markle, had a lot of time when I had breast cancer.

• 31:05Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 31:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  Let me tell you something about her.

• 31:06Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 31:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I tell you?

• 31:07Tom Segura?

  Please.

• 31:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  I've read books that are pro-Meghan and books that are pro-monarchy. Here's what I've deduced about her, because I don't go after people lightly. I really don't.

• 31:16Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 31:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  I do it for a reason. This Meghan Markle

• 31:20Tom Segura?

  Mm-hmm.

• 31:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  is beautiful, stylish,

• 31:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  manipulative.

• 31:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's a fame-seeking, money-seeking succubus. Right? Here's the problem, which is fine, by the way, because Hollywood is full of, of succubus. The problem is, is there's no talent.

• 31:42Tom Segura?

  Yeah, that's-

• 31:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  You understand?

• 31:43Tom Segura?

  That'll catch up to you.

• 31:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  You need, you need to do, there needs to be an exchange. And what she used was the royal family. She tried to take down an establishment that's long revered, long existing, and it's not cool. Now-

• 31:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  You could say that in America, there's talentless fucks like the Kardashians, right? You know what they give? Tits, ass. They give us a reality show where they show us their bad relationships and their dad who became a woman and all that stuff. That's still entertaining. She's pretending to be perfect and using the Sussex name. Now, Harry H, she calls him H, not Harry, H, is not without fault too, because he wants out of that goddamn family, right? So he did the chicken shit move instead of saying to daddy and granny, I don't want to be in the family. He married a bitch. And then she takes the fall for this. You understand?

• 32:34Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 32:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  But she is a big phony. She just wants fame and money and celebrity, but she doesn't want to do anything for it.

• 32:40Tom Segura?

  I gotta tell you.

• 32:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's the problem.

• 32:43Tom Segura?

  I don't think this is gonna help you get invited to Buckingham Palace.

• 32:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Hey, I'm Team Middleton. Team Middleton, all day long. They get the, she knew the rules going into this family. Give me a break. She pretends like, oh, I didn't know. Yes, he did, bitch.

• 32:55Tom Segura?

  So Kate and William, right?

• 32:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 32:59Tom Segura?

  They are, they're there, they're the ones that are gonna, they're still in good graces, obviously. They're the royal couple now.

• 33:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 33:08Tom Segura?

  Cause aren't Harry and Meghan not even considered royals anymore?

• 33:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  So here's the deal, man. So here's what happened. They went to the Queen, when the Queen was alive, and said, we kinda wanna do like a halfway royal thing. You know, maybe we do some duties, but not all. But that doesn't, that's not how they work, the royals. Either you're in, you're a working royal, or you're out. The reason being, the taxpayers fund this stuff, okay? So there's no, you can't do your side businesses and make money and be a working royal, because working royals do good for the public. Their whole thing is like showing up at a hospital opening. So what happened is the Queen basically was like, no, this is not how this works. You're either in or out. What are you gonna do? We're out. Okay, see you later. So they pull their security because they're not working royals. Why should the taxpayers fund their security?

• 33:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's got enough money from Princess Diana's trust. He can pay for his own security. And then Meghan, this is totally shameless, this is why I don't like her too, just from a human level. You're in this new family, you don't like your in-laws. Okay, fine. Don't go on Oprah Winfrey and say, oh, my in-laws are racist, they're bad people, everybody hates me, and do the sobbing story. You understand? She put them on blast. To make herself a name. It's disgusting. And I think it's really gross.

• 34:26Tom Segura?

  Well, I don't think it worked either. Most people don't feel like they like her more.

• 34:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  No sympathy for her because she was claiming racism when she was, oh, the tabloids are racist. It's like, I don't see that. The Queen wanted her. They even fast-tracked her getting married in Westminster Abbey because they liked her.

• 34:42Tom Segura?

  So they revoked the security. They revoked titles too, aren't they?

• 34:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  So that's the thing. So I think, I'm not sure about the title business because I thought they would.

• 34:51Tom Segura?

  Can you see that? Can you look?

• 34:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  So she says, she's talking to Mindy Kaling, and she goes, I'm Meghan Sussex. You know I'm Meghan Sussex. So she gets to keep the title, I'm guessing.

• 35:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  But you can't say you're a Sussex and carry title while you're not a working royal. It's like, dude.

• 35:12Tom Segura?

  So it says the royal, I don't know when this was printed.

• 35:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, go up. When is this? Royal family prepared to sanction removal of Prince Harry and Meghan Sussex titles amid new bombshells. When is this printed?

• 35:26Speaker 06

  This was last week.

• 35:28Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 35:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I mean.

• 35:30Tom Segura?

  So the Duke and Duchess of Sussex have pivoted away from publicity, speaking about the royal family for over the last year. The royal family are prepared to sanction the removal, Prince Harry and Meghan's Sussex titles if the couple release further damaging bombshell claims about the monarchy, according to a royal source. The Duchess Sussex hit out at the firm in a 2021 interview with Oprah Winfrey, that's the one you just, after she stepped down as a working royal. In January of 23, Prince Harry released his autobiography titled Spare.

• 35:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Which I read.

• 36:00Tom Segura?

  Which provided intimate details about his relationship and arguments with senior members of the royal family. It would take an act of parliament to take away the couple's Sussex title. But according to the Mail, a royal source has said it is still considered a potential sanction that could be explored if any further bombshell interviews or books are released. So they still have their title.

• 36:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  They still have, so here's the deal, but here's the real fun part about all this. Okay. So she's on this stupid show. She's pretending to be Martha Stewart, right?

• 36:23Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 36:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's like, I'm harvesting my beeswax, even though she doesn't give a fuck about the bees. There's a beekeeper that comes and does all the work. She's like, my best friend, who's her makeup artist that she's been on, you know, been on payroll for a million years, is coming over. I'm gonna make him some bath salts and put them in. Like, first of all, who the fuck is taking a bath when you're a guest at somebody's house? It's so fucking gross. Anyway, what was I gonna say? I'm so fired up about her.

• 36:48Tom Segura?

  Yeah, I see this. Jesus.

• 36:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, the point of the story is, I've read numerous accounts of her, and it says that she is not a good employer, that she's very nasty, very mean. And do you know that the people who work in the palace in Buckingham, they basically do it as volunteers. You don't get paid anything to, to work for the royal family.

• 37:07Tom Segura?

  Nobody does?

• 37:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  Not really. Like, I think they get a tiny amount of money, but what they do get is, I don't know, tiaras or hand-me-down stuff. Very cold and withholding to staffers, created a really awful workplace. People have quit.

• 37:21Tom Segura?

  Do you guys feel the same way about us?

• 37:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  No! No, never, of course not. Never. Can I tell you the show I'd want to watch? How She Can Fix This?

• 37:29Tom Segura?

  Any of your, our Meghan. What, how do you, how do you feel? Uh, you said, "I'm your Meghan," is that what you said? That's fucking crazy.

• 37:39Tom Segura?

  I fucking missed that.

• 37:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm your Meghan.

• 37:43Tom Segura?

  Do you, do you feel like this is that cold and, and we're withholding?

• 37:46Speaker 04

  I'm not gonna lie, this entire topic is super white people shit. I'm not following whatsoever.

• 37:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, can I tell you what the show is?

• 37:52Tom Segura?

  I'm with you.

• 37:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Please, I'm fired up. Can I tell you what the show is?

• 37:55Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 37:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's a bitch. This is the problem with Meghan Markle. She's not a nice girl. She's a bitch. I wanna see the show where she's yelling at her gardener for trimming the hedges incorrectly. I wanna see the show where she's talking shit with her fake-ass friends in Montecito about whatever. I wanna see the show where she's crying in Harry's lap, like, "Why do they hate me? The press, everybody hates me." You know, that's the, that's the Meghan Markle I wanna see.

• 38:19Tom Segura?

  This is like, I know.

• 38:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is bullshit.

• 38:21Tom Segura?

  She's, this is like,

• 38:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's bullshit.

• 38:23Tom Segura?

  Why people sometimes just hate somebody that marries into a family. It's like, she, she then...

• 38:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  But then doesn't take the responsibilities of that, of said family.

• 38:32Tom Segura?

  I know, but, but brings with them the entitlement of somebody that you would think would have to be born into the family. You know what I mean? Like, you just joined it and then you're acting like...

• 38:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  And you're shitting on an establishment that's existed for hundreds of years, and you're not even Engli- you're not British.

• 38:48Tom Segura?

  Don't forget, we, I mean,

• 38:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, right.

• 38:50Tom Segura?

  I don't think it's gonna happen anymore because of how outspoken you are, but we did have an agreement that if we were to meet the Royals, um, obviously, I don't think we're gonna meet Meghan and Harry, but if we met,

• 38:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Not the hell, I don't care.

• 38:59Tom Segura?

  If we met William and Kate,

• 39:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 39:02Tom Segura?

  That I, we have an agreement that if I am introduced... To Prince William.

• 39:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yep.

• 39:09Tom Segura?

  That I would tip my hat and go, hello governor.

• 39:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 39:12Tom Segura?

  And then.

• 39:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  This is where hello governor came from a year ago. We were in London and I said, one day you're gonna meet William and Kate. We're gonna be invited. Maybe he's a comedy fan and you have to say it. You have to do that. Look, I think they know I'm.

• 39:24Tom Segura?

  She's right.

• 39:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's a right. I'm team Middleton. I'm team William and Kate.

• 39:28Tom Segura?

  Mm hmm.

• 39:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Thank you.

• 39:30Tom Segura?

  They seem like a nice couple.

• 39:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  They are nice. Like, you know why? Can I tell you what I respect about them and the Queen? They respected the post. They respected the title. They respected the job of what they have to do. It's not an easy job to uphold these values.

• 39:44Tom Segura?

  He's got an old man's spirit too, because he embraces the horseshoe bald look, which is really crazy. That's usually men that are honestly boomers, you know, like a much older man goes, I'll rock the horseshoe.

• 39:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  So.

• 39:59Tom Segura?

  For him to do it, he's like forty something.

• 40:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  So, so here's the deal, man, is that there's, there's hairdos they're allowed to have. So this might be in the royal protocol or whatever.

• 40:10Tom Segura?

  That's insane.

• 40:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  There's certain haircuts. No, it's true. You can't have certain hairdos. You can't do certain things. He may not be able to. Cause I don't think there's ever been like a bald. I don't know. I know that there's limitations on that, on the women, like what kind of hairstyles they can have and such.

• 40:26Tom Segura?

  You don't see this.

• 40:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's not an easy gig.

• 40:28Tom Segura?

  You don't see this with men like our age.

• 40:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  The horseshoe.

• 40:32Tom Segura?

  You don't. It's really like the, the previous generation.

• 40:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  Traditionally, within the British royal family, the prince is expected to maintain a neat, short haircut, typically considered military style, with minimal styling and is generally expected to be clean shaven, meaning no beard or mustache. Although there have been exceptions like Prince Harry. I'm sorry, H.

• 40:51Tom Segura?

  H.

• 40:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  The douchous of sucks. She sucks.

• 40:54Tom Segura?

  Hello, H.

• 40:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  She's the worst.

• 40:57Tom Segura?

  All right. Well.

• 40:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Such a phony. I can't take it. It like, it hurts to watch her stupid fucking show.

• 41:06Tom Segura?

  Pretty cool.

• 41:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  I just had to say my piece.

• 41:09Tom Segura?

  You got it out there. You got it out there.

• 41:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Look how cute William was.

• 41:14Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 41:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, so that's what he looked like bald.

• 41:16Tom Segura?

  Looks good.

• 41:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  He looks handsome.

• 41:17Tom Segura?

  It looks better.

• 41:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's got a great face.

• 41:19Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 41:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Handsome.

• 41:20Tom Segura?

  Growing out this size is fucking insane.

• 41:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, there's a rumor that Prince Harry is actually the son of someone that Diana had an affair with. And if you look at the pictures, you're like, yeah, that's fucking, that holds up.

• 41:31Tom Segura?

  He definitely doesn't look like his brother.

• 41:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Not, not a lick. Doesn't look at all. I mean, that's Charles and Diana, but you look at the other boy, Harry.

• 41:41Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 41:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  The spare. I mean, look at that.

• 41:44Tom Segura?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 41:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's the dude. Look at him. And, and he's got the polo helmet on or whatever.

• 41:50Tom Segura?

  I like that this is Prince, Prince Harry was fathered, like it just says it like it's a statement.

• 41:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 41:55Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 41:55Christina Pazsitzky?

  They vehemently deny that claim.

• 41:58Tom Segura?

  Of course.

• 41:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like, obviously, but come on.

• 42:01Tom Segura?

  Of course.

• 42:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's possible. Anything's possible.

• 42:04Tom Segura?

  Well, I'm glad we got that out of the way. You can take this down.

• 42:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, I just, you don't care anything for these. They're so interesting.

• 42:12Tom Segura?

  We just gave it like fucking 20 minutes. What are you talking about?

• 42:17Tom Segura?

  Jesus.

• 42:18Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm very passionate about this.

• 42:19Tom Segura?

  I mean, your passion is felt. Everybody gets it now.

• 42:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm very invested.

• 42:23Tom Segura?

  Okay. We got it.

• 42:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  I just wish you shared my interest.

• 42:27Tom Segura?

  I definitely do.

• 42:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  Now I feel ashamed.

• 42:29Tom Segura?

  Don't feel ashamed. Here, let's get it.

• 42:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's what I care about. You care about sports and come. This is my sports and come.

• 42:36Tom Segura?

  Jesus. That's so fucking offensive. It's not, it's not what I care about. It's really, it's really rude.

• 42:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wish there weren't girls in the office. I'm always the only woman caring about girl shit.

• 42:48Tom Segura?

  Okay. Here we go.

• 42:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  All right.

• 42:50Speaker 07

  I finally got a decent foot job, so let's talk about it and read it one through 10. Somebody on Twitter reached out to me and said she gives amazing foot jobs. And I was like, there is absolutely no way. And turns out she was close to me, so I had to try it. I told her, come on, yeah, let's link up. We gonna collab. I'm gonna post it. I did the method. I'm not gonna post the video. I just wanted a free foot job. We linked up. She put like a special type of oil on her feet. And I can't lie, it was pretty decent, but the reason I say it was decent is because what even is a good foot job?

• 43:21Tom Segura?

  There you go.

• 43:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  More dick stuff, cool.

• 43:24Tom Segura?

  From Prince Harry and Prince Charles to a foot job review.

• 43:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's doing more reviews.

• 43:28Tom Segura?

  The best is that he told her he was gonna upload it. Like, I guess, I was like, yeah, I'll share it with people. And then he was like, no, of course I'm not gonna do that. So, so he was like, that's crazy.

• 43:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  To share the actual foot jobs?

• 43:41Tom Segura?

  He was gonna share it. I guess she, she wanted it shared and, and then he, yeah, he was like, no, I'm not doing that.

• 43:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, there's boundaries.

• 43:48Tom Segura?

  Well, he tricked her. That's, that's what I'm saying. He tricked her, you know what I mean?

• 43:52Speaker 07

  Have you ever had a foot job before?

• 43:53Tom Segura?

  He's going up to this guy. He's crazy.

• 43:56Speaker 07

  I mean, I mean, a foot massage? Like a foot job? How do you even know if a foot job is a good one? Like, what are you supposed to compare it to? She couldn't make me finish. I don't think I would ever finish from feet, honestly. She was kinda mad that I wanted the buns. But it's like, what do you expect? You come over here and expect to just give me feet? So, yeah, I would give this experience like a six out of 10. It's probably my last time trying this. She is expecting me to post it and tag her to give her a little bit of clout. But I'm not gonna lie, bro, I'm not gonna post that shit. What the fuck I look like posting me getting a foot job for? I don't care about digital footprint, but I don't want my future kids to see me getting a fucking foot job.

• 44:34Tom Segura?

  Well, what about this video?

• 44:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know.

• 44:38Tom Segura?

  This dude's the best. We gotta, we gotta link up with him at some point, too.

• 44:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  Maybe we should have him do, yeah, official reviews. We said the place is in Austin.

• 44:47Tom Segura?

  Yeah. We gotta get, we gotta get more out of him.

• 44:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  Geez.

• 44:52Tom Segura?

  This guy too, you know, Kanye was all in the news because he's, was selling his swastika t-shirts.

• 44:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I saw that.

• 44:58Tom Segura?

  But then there's another level you can go to, which is what this guy did.

• 45:05Tom Segura?

  Swastika tat on the chest. And he's Asian.

• 45:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's interesting.

• 45:09Tom Segura?

  That is interesting. Drugs are powerful, man. They'll just do things that you would never think possible. Like, he actually went to a shop and was like, right here, if you could...

• 45:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's wild, but I'm surprised a shop did it. Usually they have limits.

• 45:24Tom Segura?

  You could find people. You can find people in the tattoo world that are looking for it.

• 45:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Depending on the state, I guess.

• 45:30Tom Segura?

  Sure. You could be like, hey, how about right here? I watched the Charlie Manson doc last-

• 45:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes, I know. You know everything about your buddy Charlie now.

• 45:38Tom Segura?

  Fucking, you want to talk about like, the rascal of all rascals? It's Charles Manson. I mean, it's really, really-

• 45:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, I'm reading that book, Chaos.

• 45:48Tom Segura?

  That's what the doc is called.

• 45:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  That makes sense. Can you remember last night?

• 45:51Tom Segura?

  The guy that's in it is, is the author.

• 45:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Is the author, okay. That's why it makes sense, the CIA connect.

• 45:55Tom Segura?

  Yeah, Tom O'Neill's the guy that's like, kind of, they interview throughout.

• 45:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 45:59Tom Segura?

  It's really good.

• 46:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 46:01Tom Segura?

  And basically, if you like, you know, conspiracy theories and, and like, you know, there's got to be a motivation, what's the story behind the story? This is the book or the documentary for you because the theory on this is like, okay, how did this guy? Why would he do this? How does you, how do you get people to commit crimes for you? Right? Like, that was, people always were like, how does he get his followers to kill people? And that's what the documentary and the book explore. It's basically Charlie Manson went to Northern California

• 46:42Tom Segura?

  after he was let out of prison. He did like an eight, nine year bid in prison. And when he went to Northern California, it was the summer of 67. And this is as the explosion of Summer of Love and hippies and everything is happening, especially in Northern California. There's a health clinic that opens, that starts, you know, basically providing services to these people. And one of the people there is a guy by the name of Dr. Jolly, I think his name was Jolly Davis? Jolly West, that's it. Louis, and they call, his nickname was Jolly.

• 47:20Tom Segura?

  So, this guy was doing kind of experimental stuff on people with LSD-

• 47:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yep.

• 47:30Tom Segura?

  And hypnosis. And it turns out- He was doing it because the CIA was paying him to do it. They were funding his research, which is the entire basis of the MKUltra program, which is pretty well-known by people, which is the idea that you could build, you know, the Manchurian Candidate kind of stuff, like get someone to be an emotionless killer and just have them be under complete mind control. He's doing this in this, in this building where this clinic is, in the same building. You know who has an officer there?

• 48:11Tom Segura?

  Charles Manson's parole officer. So Charlie is bringing people into this building who are both going to the clinic. Some would say under the oversight of Jolly West. And he's, his parole officer is writing these incredible reviews about Charles Manson, even though he's consistently violating his parole. And they're talking about how well he's doing. So it's almost as if the parole officer is doing this for another reason. Like, why is he writing that Charlie is doing so well and improving when it's, when he's clearly in violation of his parole all the time?

• 48:56Tom Segura?

  Well, a year after that, Charlie comes back down to LA, moves into the spawn ranch, has all these followers. He's drugging them with LSD. He's giving these speeches to them. He's doing sermons. And shortly thereafter, he has like this legion of followers who will do whatever he wants, including killing people. So it's exploring that entire story and it's, it's pretty crazy.

• 49:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, I'm reading the book and it goes into great detail, the murder of Sharon Tate and the people in the house and how they did it. I mean, literally the first, I'd say quarter of the book is just outlining the brutality with which these people carried out. So it's so, oh, it's hard to read.

• 49:42Tom Segura?

  The doc, you know, it goes into really great detail about the murders as well and the investigation and basically how lackluster the LAPD.

• 49:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes, they knew, they knew.

• 49:50Tom Segura?

  Investigation. It took months before they even showed up at the ranch.

• 49:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  That happened.

• 49:55Tom Segura?

  The LaBianca's the next day.

• 49:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  They were just like family business owners. They weren't show business. They weren't. Like, you know what I mean?

• 50:02Tom Segura?

  And the public word from LAPD was that they said the La Bianca and the Tate murders were not related at the time. This is what they put out publicly and everyone was like, what?

• 50:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 50:13Tom Segura?

  It sure seemed like they're related, painted the same words on the walls and it's a, it's a mindfuck, the whole story is, but it's a really good watch.

• 50:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, Charlie Manson, usually you and I don't overlap in our interests of this nature. You're not interested in the Royals. Got it. Noted. I'm not always interested in murder, but you and I and our Venn diagram of interests, I like Charlie. Maybe because it's an LA guy.

• 50:41Tom Segura?

  Maybe it's that he's a unifier. Maybe the guy's actually, I mean, he's a pretty neat guy.

• 50:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  He's a pretty cool guy. He's into peace and love and LSD.

• 50:49Tom Segura?

  We both like music. He was a musician.

• 50:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  He was a musician. Well, so they say that he wanted to kill the Tates, right? Who was the, sorry, the famous guy?

• 50:57Tom Segura?

  He didn't want to kill the Tates. No, he didn't want to kill him either. That's who he wanted to kill.

• 51:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  The music guy that rejected him or something?

• 51:04Tom Segura?

  Terry Melcher. So the problem was that Terry Melcher used to live at Cielo Drive, the house that Sharon Tate was in.

• 51:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yep.

• 51:13Tom Segura?

  Charlie Manson sent them to kill him.

• 51:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  All right.

• 51:17Tom Segura?

  But he didn't know that he had moved.

• 51:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Not there anymore.

• 51:20Tom Segura?

  So he told the people, kill Terry and kill anybody who's there.

• 51:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oof.

• 51:24Tom Segura?

  Well, they just showed up and just killed everybody who was there.

• 51:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  It was brutal.

• 51:29Tom Segura?

  And the person who they didn't kill was the guy that didn't live there anymore, which was the guy they wanted to kill.

• 51:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah. And they strung them up. You know that the bodies hung them up?

• 51:39Tom Segura?

  Who?

• 51:40Christina Pazsitzky?

  The Manson killers. They strung up the bodies. They hung them up.

• 51:45Tom Segura?

  Tate was on the floor.

• 51:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oof. No, she was on the floor then when they found her, but they hung her up. I think they slit the bodies. They like hung them up in the rafters or something and did some shit like that. That's what it said in the book. Yeah.

• 51:58Tom Segura?

  I don't know. I didn't see that.

• 52:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, maybe they didn't detail it, you know?

• 52:03Tom Segura?

  All right.

• 52:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's just a part I remember.

• 52:12Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 52:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  What?

• 52:14Tom Segura?

  Okay, I mean, yeah, sure.

• 52:16Christina Pazsitzky?

  It was gnarly. And you know what, too, is that I had a business meeting one time at this house, the Sharon Tate murder house, because the guy is a big television producer of like a family sitcom show, bought the house, changed the numeric address, and I asked him, I was like, hey, just curious, why would somebody buy the Sharon Tate murder house? This is pretty notorious. And he goes, well, it turns out murder land is discount land. So instead of paying six million, I paid four million, whatever. And you're like, that really? Personally, I don't think I could live in that house, right? I mean, that land?

• 52:58Tom Segura?

  I mean, you probably wouldn't want to, right? Like, it's kind of bad vibes.

• 53:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Bad, that's the house. It's a beautiful home.

• 53:04Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 53:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  It was really nice, but like, man, that was a weird one.

• 53:10Tom Segura?

  That's the house now. That's the house you went to.

• 53:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, that's the house I went to. We had lunch. There was a butler that served us lunch. So weird. It was super weird, dude. I was like, I don't know if I could work with this dude. But I had to go to the meeting because I'm like, it's at the fucking Tate murder house.

• 53:25Tom Segura?

  And he, his big thing was like, this is discounted land.

• 53:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, he liked that there was a discount

• 53:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  from the murders. It's wild, right?

• 53:35Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 53:37Christina Pazsitzky?

  He was, and he said it so nonchalantly, too. Like, I mean, you know, it's cheap. Spoken like a true Hollywood guy.

• 53:43Tom Segura?

  Yeah, that's a good producer right there. He was like, I will get this movie made. All right, let's, uh, let's take a quick break and then we'll be right back.

• 53:57Tom Segura?

  Welcome back, and we are back with a very special guest. The last time we saw him, he was here just railing against the less fortunate, he used washcloths, and today he's here to talk about so much more. You know him from Shark Tank, you know him. The owner of the Dallas Mavericks and you know, uh, we're gonna get into, uh, costplusdrugs.com. It's Mark Cuban, everybody.

• 54:17Speaker 06

  Hey.

• 54:19Tom Segura?

  Thank you for, for coming.

• 54:21Speaker 06

  Thanks for having me. Hey, any place that's got vodka on the table.

• 54:23Tom Segura?

  Hey, man.

• 54:24Speaker 06

  At 11, 10 in the morning, whatever it is, yeah.

• 54:26Tom Segura?

  Would you like a glass with some ice?

• 54:27Speaker 06

  No, fuck no. Are you a drinker? Um, depends on the, the moment. Yeah. I don't drink as much as I used to, but I'll, I'll find a reason to.

• 54:35Tom Segura?

  Yeah, it's, it's fun. I don't like to do it all, all the time, but this is ours. So this is like.

• 54:40Speaker 06

  Well, then you gotta do it all the time.

• 54:41Tom Segura?

  We gotta do it, yeah. But I mean, you know.

• 54:43Speaker 06

  Lead by example, right?

• 54:44Tom Segura?

  I try to. I try my best. Try to do it in the AM, kind of power through the day.

• 54:48Speaker 06

  Right?

• 54:48Tom Segura?

  Yeah, man.

• 54:49Speaker 06

  But I don't have a problem.

• 54:50Tom Segura?

  No, that's nice. No, not at all. Look, man, I remember watching something once. It was an interview you were, you were doing where you said,

• 54:59Tom Segura?

  everybody who stops me on the street wants to talk about Shark Tank and I just want to talk about basketball.

• 55:04Speaker 06

  Right.

• 55:05Tom Segura?

  So let me lead.

• 55:06Speaker 06

  Oh, great. Now you want to talk about basketball.

• 55:09Tom Segura?

  What the fuck happened, man?

• 55:11Speaker 06

  I have no idea.

• 55:11Tom Segura?

  Wait, is that for real?

• 55:13Speaker 06

  No, I'm lying.

• 55:14Tom Segura?

  But like, it's, it's beyond.

• 55:16Speaker 06

  If I had, if I had any influence, it, no, yeah.

• 55:18Tom Segura?

  But so just to lay things out for people who might not know, cause the, literally the last time I saw you, it was, I think it was about fresh news that you had sold your majority shares in the Mavericks. And you're like, it's a great situation where I sold the team, but I still have operational control.

• 55:34Speaker 06

  Basketball, yeah, that was the mission.

• 55:36Tom Segura?

  But what part of basketball do you control and what do you not?

• 55:40Speaker 06

  I don't anymore. And I haven't for a while.

• 55:42Tom Segura?

  So you, so you relinquished all of it?

• 55:44Speaker 06

  I didn't relinquish, they kinda.

• 55:46Tom Segura?

  Muscled it out of you.

• 55:47Speaker 06

  Yeah, I wouldn't say muscled, but you know, the majority owner, Patrick Dumont, decided that, you know, he was comfortable with, um, Nico Harrison, the general manager and the team he had put together, which is his choice.

• 55:59Tom Segura?

  His choice.

• 55:59Speaker 06

  I mean, and you can't totally argue with him because, you know, we went to the finals.

• 56:03Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 56:04Speaker 06

  Now I could tell you, you know, but stuff, but yeah, it was his choice and he made his choice. And so.

• 56:11Tom Segura?

  So he.

• 56:11Speaker 06

  I'm just a fan now.

• 56:12Tom Segura?

  You were in the position of having some.

• 56:14Speaker 06

  That was, yeah. Well, when I originally sold the team, that originally was the converse, that originally what was supposed to happen.

• 56:20Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 56:20Speaker 06

  And then over time, and initially it was, you know, and then over time it was like, okay, and Nico, we trust. And so here we are.

• 56:28Tom Segura?

  So I have to imagine that in the, of course, we're talking about Luca being traded, which was, I think in like, we're not, you know, similar-ish in like the biggest trade in American sports that I, like, I remember Herschel Walker being traded. Remember that? When you're like, what the fuck?

• 56:44Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 56:45Tom Segura?

  It was crazy.

• 56:45Speaker 06

  And that turned around the Cowboys. That was great.

• 56:47Tom Segura?

  Yeah, but like, I imagine your, your phone blew up a lot?

• 56:52Speaker 06

  Well, I was in Florida at a conference and I don't know, 11 at night, or whatever it was.

• 56:57Tom Segura?

  Yeah, it was late.

• 56:58Speaker 06

  Yeah, and I get a text and it was from our general manager and I thought he was asking me of what I thought. And then I realized very quickly, he was telling me what happened and I told him I didn't agree with it and da, da, da, da, da. And various reasons and, but it wasn't my decision to make.

• 57:16Tom Segura?

  Wow.

• 57:17Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 57:17Tom Segura?

  And it, I mean, for people on the outside, I mean, I know people, a lot of people in Dallas, it was pretty well reported, they're very, were very upset.

• 57:25Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah. My family, my, my daughter was at a party and, you know, had to hide.

• 57:30Tom Segura?

  Really?

• 57:31Speaker 06

  When it came out. Oh, yeah. It was, and still, like, I was at, here at South by Southwest. I was at the premiere of The Accountant 2, great movie, by the way, and somebody started yelling, fire Nico.

• 57:43Tom Segura?

  Wow.

• 57:44Speaker 06

  You know?

• 57:44Tom Segura?

  But it's just, I mean.

• 57:45Speaker 06

  It's like the new, um, let's go Brandon.

• 57:48Tom Segura?

  Yeah, yeah, exactly. But this is like, it's so insane to people that when you have, I mean, Luca's a legit, like, generational talent.

• 57:56Speaker 06

  You don't have to convince me, you know?

• 57:58Tom Segura?

  But it's, it's.

• 57:58Speaker 06

  Yeah, I mean, I, I don't get it either.

• 58:01Tom Segura?

  You don't get it either?

• 58:02Speaker 06

  No.

• 58:03Tom Segura?

  And it is one of these things that, as people have said early on, like, time will tell, like.

• 58:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, that's the way all trades work.

• 58:09Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 58:10Speaker 06

  You know, look, you know, 2004, I let Steve Nash walk and he won two MVPs the next two years. But the good news was, he beat us in the playoffs the first year after he left. And then we made it to the finals and won a championship. So it kind of covered all that.

• 58:28Tom Segura?

  Is it hard being in that position to go, you know, this guy, you like the guy, you go, this is a skilled guy, but you have to look at a team's needs and sometimes.

• 58:38Speaker 06

  Yeah, it is, right? Because you develop personal relationships, you know, with them. And like, I love Luka, right? You know, we weren't best buddies, but I would text him all the time and DM him and, you know, try to, you know, I would give him all these motivational quotes, even gave him books to read and stuff to read. You know, and so we had a good relationship, got along great with his dad. I mean, I was just as dumbfounded as everybody else.

• 59:00Tom Segura?

  Yeah. And then the, the current rumor mill is that they're gonna look, talking about waving Kyrie.

• 59:06Speaker 06

  What?

• 59:06Tom Segura?

  Yeah, man, you don't watch the rumor mill?

• 59:08Speaker 06

  I don't watch the rumor mill.

• 59:09Tom Segura?

  Yeah, man.

• 59:10Speaker 06

  No, there's no, you know, that, that'd make no sense whatsoever.

• 59:13Tom Segura?

  Well, that, the first one.

• 59:15Speaker 06

  What?

• 59:16Tom Segura?

  Fucking Luka going.

• 59:17Speaker 06

  Well, yeah, but you know, okay, you're right.

• 59:21Tom Segura?

  That didn't make sense to me.

• 59:22Speaker 06

  And I love Kyrie too. Maybe they're just trying to get rid of the, the people I like, right?

• 59:25Tom Segura?

  Yeah, maybe that's the whole mission.

• 59:27Speaker 06

  You know, new man, somebody comes in, takes over a new, a company, gets rid of the old guys, you know?

• 59:30Tom Segura?

  Maybe you need to do some reverse psychology and talk about.

• 59:33Speaker 06

  How awful they are.

• 59:35Speaker 06

  I love Kyrie, actually.

• 59:36Tom Segura?

  Yeah. No, I mean, he's, he's amazing.

• 59:38Speaker 06

  He's a good dude too. Yeah, he's a really good. Both those guys are really good guys.

• 59:41Tom Segura?

  All right. Now Christina's like, all right, I don't know anything about basketball.

• 59:42Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, I, I know, uh, this guy, Luka, cause he's my tribe, right? What is he?

• 59:48Speaker 06

  Slovenian.

• 59:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, Slovenian.

• 59:49Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 59:50Christina Pazsitzky?

  I get it.

• 59:51Tom Segura?

  Speaks better Spanish than English too.

• 59:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Seriously? Shut the front door. Seriously?

• 59:55Tom Segura?

  He played for Real Madrid.

• 59:56Speaker 06

  Yeah, when he was 13, he moved to Spain.

• 59:59Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 59:59Speaker 06

  Didn't know the language, learned it, speaks English, Slovenian, all these, yeah.

• 1:00:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Isn't that crazy?

• 1:00:03Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Kobe was like that too with Italy, right?

• 1:00:06Tom Segura?

  Yeah. Kobe, yeah, he spoke great Italian. Um, I'm excited. I really want to see this guy. Like, I'm so excited to watch what happens. Like, I'm such a fan of his and this story. I mean, I, I just want to see what, I know we're not allowed to cheer for the Lakers here, but I just want to see what happens with him, you know?

• 1:00:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's just brutal. It's painful no matter how you look at it.

• 1:00:23Tom Segura?

  Yeah. All right.

• 1:00:25Speaker 06

  It's like talking about the, yeah, it's just, yeah.

• 1:00:28Christina Pazsitzky?

  Sorry, Mark.

• 1:00:29Speaker 06

  I know, I'm in mourning kind of still.

• 1:00:31Tom Segura?

  I understand. Hopefully.

• 1:00:34Speaker 06

  But they paid me to buy the circus and so, you know.

• 1:00:38Tom Segura?

  That's true.

• 1:00:38Speaker 06

  I just look at my bank account and feel better.

• 1:00:40Tom Segura?

  There you go, yeah. That's what I'm talking about.

• 1:00:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:44Tom Segura?

  Hell yeah, let's talk about money.

• 1:00:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, let's talk about rich guy stuff.

• 1:00:47Speaker 06

  Well, no, it just is what it is, right? You know, I sold for a reason and, you know, um, nothing more I can say about that. I mean.

• 1:00:54Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:54Speaker 06

  Yeah, is what it is. Can we ask you a rich guy question though? Sure. So. It's better than being asked poor guy questions because I used to get asked those too.

• 1:01:02Tom Segura?

  Yeah, true, right?

• 1:01:04Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, nothing worse than being poor.

• 1:01:05Speaker 06

  Hey, I've been there.

• 1:01:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  We've been there too.

• 1:01:07Tom Segura?

  Is there any secret rich guy stuff that people should? What I mean is, everybody knows about bigger homes, planes, boats, like that's like the accessible stuff. But I think the exciting thing is to learn that there's some secret shit you don't know.

• 1:01:22Speaker 06

  Oh, there is.

• 1:01:23Tom Segura?

  Yeah?

• 1:01:24Speaker 06

  Like it makes ugly people handsome and pretty.

• 1:01:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, that too.

• 1:01:27Speaker 06

  Right?

• 1:01:28Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  Meaning the.

• 1:01:30Speaker 06

  No, I know what you meant.

• 1:01:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  No, no, no, Jamie Foxx said it great. He goes, there's a fame mist. Once you become famous, people like you a lot more. It's the same with money, yeah?

• 1:01:41Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, I mean, they go hand in hand for the most part, you know, maybe the level of fame isn't the same, but um, yeah, I mean, people, when you're on these lists and everything, people know who you are.

• 1:01:52Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 1:01:53Speaker 06

  You know, and they treat you differently. And that's probably the hardest part. And that's why, you know, I can go places and like, hey, hey, hey, hey, that's Mark, da, da, da, da, da. You lose your anonymity for better or worse.

• 1:02:05Tom Segura?

  Right. But do you, and then do you also develop some skill for reading whether somebody authentically kind of?

• 1:02:13Speaker 06

  No, because I'm not looking for new friends, really.

• 1:02:15Tom Segura?

  So you're just like.

• 1:02:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, no new friends.

• 1:02:16Speaker 06

  You know, my, my friends are my high school buddies, my college buddies, my rugby teammates, you know, the people, my roommates from Dallas, when I moved to Dallas, all the same people, you know, guys that played basketball. I mean, you know, I've been around long enough that I've got,

• 1:02:30Tom Segura?

  You have your core group of friends.

• 1:02:31Speaker 06

  And plus I've got, you know. Three kids, fifteen, eighteen, and twenty-one, and that's kind of all your focus and your mental focus, your emotional focus and everything, so.

• 1:02:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's true, because you are from Pittsburgh, you grew up working class.

• 1:02:45Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 1:02:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  So you grew up hustling. I remember I read this thing that you, when there was a newspaper strike.

• 1:02:50Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's funny, someone else just asked me about that, you know, an hour ago.

• 1:02:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Tell the story, I want to hear that.

• 1:02:54Speaker 06

  So, um, in Pittsburgh, it was the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette and the Pittsburgh Press were the papers. And if I remember right, they were both printed the same place, so they went on strike. And so there were no newspapers. And so I had a nineteen sixty-six Buick Les Sabre, a big old boat. And me and my buddies, um, piled into the car and drove to Cleveland. And back then, the newspapers were like a quarter each or whatever, I don't know. And so we had, you know, rolls and rolls of change. And we just went to, we waited for the newspapers to come out. And we went and hunted down every Cleveland Plain Dealer truck that we could find, and just tried to buy out and bought out literally all the papers that would fit in our car.

• 1:03:36Speaker 06

  And so we then drove back to Pittsburgh and stood on the corners in the morning, because we went, you know, midnight the night before, got back to Pittsburgh, you know, six in the morning. And I remember standing downtown, you know, papers for sale, papers for sale. And instead of it being a quarter, they were a dollar each, and people would tip us just because everybody got all their news from the newspaper back then.

• 1:03:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  And how old were you?

• 1:03:58Speaker 06

  Sixteen.

• 1:03:59Tom Segura?

  So this entrepreneurial spirit is just in somebody, right?

• 1:04:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, for me, it's been since I was nine, ten years old.

• 1:04:04Tom Segura?

  How, I wonder, because you mentioned that like you have three kids that are like fifteen, eighteen, twenty. And there's got to be a thing when your dad is super successful and it's also super public. Like, how do you deal with like a kid being like,

• 1:04:20Speaker 06

  It's hard.

• 1:04:21Tom Segura?

  What am I gonna do, right?

• 1:04:22Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's hard, right? And, you know, you try to just let them be themselves. And I try not to say you've got to go in this direction or that direction. Like, I was talking to one of my kids about college the other day, and it's like, you don't have to know what you're gonna be when you grow up.

• 1:04:35Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:36Speaker 06

  Even, even, put aside, you know, our financial situation. And I don't think any kid should be under the pressure at eighteen or twenty-two when they graduate from college to know exactly what they're going to do.

• 1:04:46Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:47Speaker 06

  And everything's changing so rapidly, in technology perspective, just the world in general. So just, you know, be curious. That's what I try to get them to do.

• 1:04:55Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 1:04:55Speaker 06

  Be curious so that you always want to learn something, figure things out.

• 1:05:00Speaker 06

  Be, you know, the more knowledge you have, the more, not power, but the more capabilities you have and the more options are available to you. And so I try to, you know, my wife and I try to really let them be themselves.

• 1:05:12Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:13Speaker 06

  You know, and there are times though, you know, which I hate, where my kids are like, no, we don't want you there, Dad. You know, like there are times like my, both of my younger kids play basketball and they know if I go to a basketball game, you know, there's, you know, the other team will come up and take pictures and this and that. It's just like, you know, so I'll come up.

• 1:05:31Tom Segura?

  That's tough.

• 1:05:32Speaker 06

  Yeah, that's tough. I hate it.

• 1:05:33Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:33Speaker 06

  You know, or no, we don't want you there, Dad, because it'll make a scene for whatever reason. I'm like, that's brutal.

• 1:05:39Tom Segura?

  Brutal.

• 1:05:39Speaker 06

  That is brutal. Um, but at the same time, I understand it.

• 1:05:43Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:43Speaker 06

  Now, a lot, most of the time I still show up.

• 1:05:45Tom Segura?

  Yeah, come in the side.

• 1:05:47Speaker 06

  Back door or whatever, yeah.

• 1:05:49Christina Pazsitzky?

  But it sounds like you're, I mean, it just sounds like you're so grounded, but how? You're like this crazy billionaire.

• 1:05:55Speaker 06

  I mean.

• 1:05:56Tom Segura?

  You're not crazy.

• 1:05:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Not crazy, but like crazy amount of money, I'm saying.

• 1:06:01Speaker 06

  No, it is an insane amount of money.

• 1:06:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  That changes people, like we've seen it in our business. People can go nutty because the bar gets raised on reality. You know what I mean?

• 1:06:10Speaker 06

  Not really.

• 1:06:11Tom Segura?

  But you can choose to, I think the thing is that money allows you to have the choice.

• 1:06:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, no, no question. Like I've been in situations where, you know, I've been out, my credit card got taken, you know?

• 1:06:21Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:22Speaker 06

  I've come home and the lights are off and all that stuff, right? Um, hole in my floorboard, my car, all, all the, the stories of when you're broke.

• 1:06:29Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:30Speaker 06

  You know, and, and, but I've, my attitude's always been if you were happy when you were poor.

• 1:06:35Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 1:06:35Speaker 06

  You're gonna be happy when you're rich.

• 1:06:36Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:37Speaker 06

  If you were miserable when you were poor.

• 1:06:39Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:39Speaker 06

  You're gonna be miserable when you're rich. Miserable people just stay miserable no matter what the circumstances. And like I, I tried to be a fun guy, enjoy my life when I was broke. I didn't, you know, I was sleeping on the floor, five, you know, you know, five roommates in a three bedroom apartment and had a blast.

• 1:06:55Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:55Speaker 06

  You know, and, and I just, I, I always felt like when, it's weird when you first make money, it's like, okay, what am I gonna buy? So I bought a plane, you know, and.

• 1:07:05Tom Segura?

  Fuck yes, dude.

• 1:07:06Speaker 06

  Fuck yes, right, yeah.

• 1:07:07Tom Segura?

  Can you just give us a good, like, can you, first of all, be a bro and just kind of talk about how it wouldn't be a poor idea for me to invest in a, in an aircraft?

• 1:07:20Speaker 06

  I think it's brilliant.

• 1:07:22Tom Segura?

  That's what I'm talking about. Here's the thing, I'm gonna clip, this is what we're gonna do. I'm gonna clip this out and I'm gonna send it to my business manager. Let's start forgetting. Mark, do you think I should get a plane?

• 1:07:30Speaker 06

  How could you not? Of course.

• 1:07:32Tom Segura?

  Like, how about the time that I save?

• 1:07:34Speaker 06

  The time that you save is money in the bank because you are an earner. You are an entrepreneur. You create wealth and the more time you have.

• 1:07:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's what's up.

• 1:07:46Speaker 06

  The more money you'll make for your business partners.

• 1:07:48Tom Segura?

  Shit.

• 1:07:49Speaker 06

  You are doing enough for yourself because you are not selfish like that. You are doing it for them. You need a plane, not because you need a plane. Because you care so much for their future.

• 1:07:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Ooh, I like that.

• 1:07:59Speaker 06

  That you are gonna help them grow their net worth and you are gonna put, because most people wouldn't buy the plane.

• 1:08:05Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 1:08:05Speaker 06

  Most people might just stay at home, put on a Netflix show.

• 1:08:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:12Speaker 06

  Workout, whatever, but not you.

• 1:08:13Tom Segura?

  I'm, I'm out there grinding, man.

• 1:08:15Speaker 06

  You're grinding because you are a grinder and with a plane.

• 1:08:19Tom Segura?

  Grind even harder.

• 1:08:19Speaker 06

  Your grind ability is multiplied.

• 1:08:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's what's up. And then your wife can take that plane wherever she wants.

• 1:08:26Speaker 06

  Oh, hell no, that ruins all the.

• 1:08:29Tom Segura?

  Josh, you know where to clip it.

• 1:08:31Speaker 06

  You got it.

• 1:08:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  I gotta go to LA for the day.

• 1:08:33Speaker 06

  Right?

• 1:08:34Tom Segura?

  Fuck yeah.

• 1:08:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  Can I ask you, what, did you read a lot? How did you learn? Who, are you reading Napoleon Hill? Who are you reading?

• 1:08:41Tom Segura?

  I did though. I read your book.

• 1:08:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Me too.

• 1:08:44Speaker 06

  How to Win at the Sport of Business?

• 1:08:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes.

• 1:08:45Speaker 06

  Short and sweet?

• 1:08:46Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yep.

• 1:08:46Tom Segura?

  Yes, but you know what? It's so inform, first of all, it gets, it got me fired up.

• 1:08:50Speaker 06

  It's called How to Win at the Sport of Business. It's like 64 pages.

• 1:08:53Tom Segura?

  It's, it's, it's great.

• 1:08:57Tom Segura?

  The thing that I also get is, you know, so many people, you'll, you'll hear this thing. Your whole life, you hear like, man, if I had a million dollars or whatever, they go, you'd never see me again. Like, right? And then you see these guys like you, super successful guys, who you're like, hey, how come you're working? You're like, because that's like the, my lifeline.

• 1:09:14Speaker 06

  That's what I like to do.

• 1:09:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's what you enjoy.

• 1:09:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, but you know, I love to read, right? To this day, you know, um, reading, driving around, listening to, um, motivational speeches.

• 1:09:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Who are you reading? Tell me, who do you, who do you like?

• 1:09:28Speaker 06

  Um, there's not any one, like now I just read about artificial intelligence and healthcare. You know, it's not like, oh, I've got this great fiction guy or, you know, this, you know, biographer. Um, but, um, like when I was just getting to Dallas, I drive around listening to Zig Ziglar, the, the same motivational tape all the time. Zig Ziglar. Over and over. And I drive by the big houses, you know, just this is the mod- yeah, there you go. Zig Ziglar, my man. Um, you know. Great name. Yeah. What a great name. And, and so, um, it was just, anything I could do to get motivated, because the way I always, particularly in technology, right? The way I always looked at tech was, there was the person who or people who created it. And then there was everybody else.

• 1:10:13Speaker 06

  And I was tied with everybody else. And so if I put in the effort to learn it, that put me ahead of everybody else who was selling it, integrating it, doing whatever. So it was just a question of effort. And that's the way I've always looked at business. If I put in the time, like healthcare with costplusdrugs.com, oh, you can't disrupt pharmacy. Well, we have.

• 1:10:31Tom Segura?

  This is a brilliant business.

• 1:10:33Speaker 06

  No, it's, it's killing it. It's killing. It's called costplusdrugs.com. And, you know, most people, when you, when you go to the doctor and get a prescription, and the doctor just says, okay, you need this prescription, what pharmacy do you use? And that's it. And you have no idea if you can afford it. You don't know what your co-pay or your deductible or your coinsurance is, if you have insurance or if you have high deductible or no insurance, you're screwed, right? Because you, you have that fear of walking up. Like I said, when I was broke, if I needed a prescription, it's terrifying to stand in line. So what we did at costplusdrugs.com, we decided to bring some transparency. So you go to costplusdrugs.com, you put in the name of the medication that, that you need, and we carry about 2,500 of them, not all of them, but we're getting there. And

• 1:11:15Speaker 06

  first thing that comes up is our cost. We show you what it costs us to buy.

• 1:11:20Tom Segura?

  What it costs you.

• 1:11:20Speaker 06

  Yeah. What it costs us to buy. And so put into Dillaphill, T A D A L, it's generic Cialis. And I know you want to know what it costs.

• 1:11:27Tom Segura?

  Hell yeah, dude.

• 1:11:29Speaker 06

  T A D A something. Phil, Dillaphill.

• 1:11:36Speaker 06

  So you see like for five milligrams for a 30 count, right? So a whole month, it's only $6.60. And that's including our 15% markup. And then it's, you know, I think that includes our pharmacy fee as well. So then it's $5 for shipping and handling. So for $11.60, I'm just telling you, you could get 90 of them. Click on 90, click on 90.

• 1:11:57Tom Segura?

  90 count.

• 1:11:59Speaker 06

  Okay, for $9.70, which costs less? A big bag of M&Ms or now 90 generic Cialis?

• 1:12:08Tom Segura?

  Dude, look at the comparative price. Retail price with other pharmacies?

• 1:12:11Christina Pazsitzky?

  My god.

• 1:12:13Speaker 06

  So, but yeah, but that's not even the point. The bigger point is what brings more joy to your day? An M&M sitting next to your bed or generic Cialis?

• 1:12:21Tom Segura?

  There's Cialis.

• 1:12:22Speaker 06

  That's what I'm saying.

• 1:12:23Tom Segura?

  I start my day with this.

• 1:12:24Speaker 06

  You know how the birth rate is declining? And you know, that's what we're here for, to increase the birth rate. So everybody out there, get your prescription for Tidillaphil or whatever.

• 1:12:34Tom Segura?

  Can I tell you something about the Tidillaphil too? Some people are really married to this idea is that you pop one before you're going to have intercourse. What I like to do is pop it in the morning and just see where the day takes me. I love going to the urinal and being like, look at this guy. Like, it's way more than I thought.

• 1:12:51Speaker 06

  It's like Morning Wood is back.

• 1:12:52Tom Segura?

  It's back. It's back, it feels great.

• 1:12:55Speaker 06

  See, that is, that is the whole mission, right? We are here for every guy of a certain age to have a smile on his face in the morning.

• 1:13:03Tom Segura?

  And by the way, if you're going to go sit with the boss and you're, you're asking for, for a, for a raise, it's way better to do it with a chubby than fully flaccid. You feel like, you sit up.

• 1:13:12Speaker 06

  And when you get that plane, let me just tell you.

• 1:13:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  What about the yacht? Do we do the yacht?

• 1:13:21Speaker 06

  I'm not a yacht guy.

• 1:13:21Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're not a yacht guy?

• 1:13:22Speaker 06

  Cause you're stuck.

• 1:13:23Tom Segura?

  Did you ever charter one though?

• 1:13:24Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 1:13:24Tom Segura?

  And you enjoyed it or no?

• 1:13:26Speaker 06

  My family did, me not as much.

• 1:13:27Tom Segura?

  You not as much?

• 1:13:28Speaker 06

  Yeah, me not as much.

• 1:13:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  What didn't you like?

• 1:13:29Speaker 06

  Cause I was disconnected from everything, you know? And I wanted, I don't like that, you know? I run all my businesses 95% via email.

• 1:13:38Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:38Speaker 06

  And so when I'm disconnected.

• 1:13:39Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:40Speaker 06

  So I can get caught up and put my phone down. That's fine, right?

• 1:13:43Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:43Speaker 06

  But if I, I don't know how far behind I am.

• 1:13:45Tom Segura?

  That.

• 1:13:46Speaker 06

  That's just anxiety for me.

• 1:13:47Tom Segura?

  And does somebody, everybody, like, there's a thing where no matter who you marry in this world, you, you, there's things you accept about a spouse, right?

• 1:13:56Speaker 06

  Yeah, of course.

• 1:13:57Tom Segura?

  Does your wife just has accepted from the beginning, like, this guy works. Like, you're like, like.

• 1:14:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  True thing.

• 1:14:03Speaker 06

  Yeah, she know, but, you know, she's very independent. She's super smart, independent. So it's more like my wife is doing her thing.

• 1:14:10Tom Segura?

  Oh, her thing?

• 1:14:11Speaker 06

  Yeah, and I can either come along.

• 1:14:12Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 1:14:13Speaker 06

  It's up to me, right? She's not waiting on me. That, that's why I love her, because she's like, strong. She does her own thing. She, yeah, she's got things that, you know, her responsibility in the house.

• 1:14:26Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:26Speaker 06

  I don't touch it, you know? There's just certain things that I know that that's tips.

• 1:14:30Tom Segura?

  Yeah, that's a, I think that's a good way.

• 1:14:32Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's kind of how you have to if you're, if you're married to a highly motivated, career-driven man. The woman has to be able to do her own thing.

• 1:14:40Speaker 06

  Well, in this case, she's more motivated than I am. You know, she, she really, I mean.

• 1:14:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  What is she into? What does she do?

• 1:14:46Speaker 06

  Tennis.

• 1:14:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, I like that.

• 1:14:47Speaker 06

  Yeah, kids.

• 1:14:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, family.

• 1:14:49Speaker 06

  Different stuff, yeah, charity stuff, yeah.

• 1:14:51Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's nice.

• 1:14:52Speaker 06

  Yeah, but she's, she's on the go all the time.

• 1:14:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's awesome.

• 1:14:55Tom Segura?

  Do you have a, because the show, obviously Shark Tank is a worldwide, global phenomenon. Do you have an immediate bullshit meter thing that goes on when it starts? Like, is there a tell for you?

• 1:15:06Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 1:15:07Tom Segura?

  What's your tell that you're like, this is some bullshit?

• 1:15:10Speaker 06

  You know, the number one tell is when they talk about, well, if you only get 1% of this billion-dollar market.

• 1:15:15Tom Segura?

  Oh, okay.

• 1:15:16Speaker 06

  Because everybody says that.

• 1:15:16Tom Segura?

  The valuation is just.

• 1:15:17Speaker 06

  Yeah, well, no, like, well, if I get 1% of a billion-dollar market, that's $10 million in sales. And, you know, it's only a $100,000, but you're not going to get 1%.

• 1:15:26Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:27Speaker 06

  You know, so that's, that's the number one thing. But literally, the hardest part of Shark Tank is coming up with something to say to go out. So the minute they come on and they start talking, I'm not looking for reasons to go in. I'm looking for reasons to go out.

• 1:15:39Tom Segura?

  Ah.

• 1:15:39Speaker 06

  And, and because I've done too many deals. Um, but once they, but then sometimes it'll just be like, no, I gotta do this deal.

• 1:15:49Tom Segura?

  Really?

• 1:15:49Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:15:50Tom Segura?

  And you, it just, everything lines up for you?

• 1:15:52Speaker 06

  Not everything, but you know, I end up selling myself. It's like, okay, they're not good at A, B, or C, but I'm really good at A, B, and C. So if we combine forces, um, and I'm wrong probably half the time.

• 1:16:05Tom Segura?

  But it has to be.

• 1:16:06Speaker 06

  Yeah, I've got, you know.

• 1:16:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Well, that's interesting. You're wrong half the time. Do you think that accepting failure is part of why you're so successful too? Like, do you just move on?

• 1:16:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, you got to, right? Because if you're not failing, you're not trying. I mean, it's cliche-ish, but it's true. You know, you've, you've got to dive in and try things and see what happens and, you know, that, that's okay if it doesn't work because especially in investing, you know, you want your, your wins to cover all your failures.

• 1:16:33Tom Segura?

  Sure.

• 1:16:34Speaker 06

  Like down here, um, in Austin, I'm going to see the guys from Beatbox Beverages. You know, they were a Shark Tank company and they're just crushing it. They went from struggling initially, um, when they came on the show to through more, you know, effort on their own, um, to now being hundreds of millions of dollars in sales.

• 1:16:52Tom Segura?

  Jesus.

• 1:16:52Speaker 06

  And being worth hundreds of millions of dollars, um, as a company. So.

• 1:16:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's awesome.

• 1:16:58Tom Segura?

  And that's, that's a Shark Tank.

• 1:16:59Speaker 06

  Yeah, like Dude Wipes, bring up Dude Wipes, same thing.

• 1:17:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:17:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, Dude Wipes is a major brand now. Everybody knows what Dude Wipes is. Their marketing and everything.

• 1:17:07Tom Segura?

  Was that a?

• 1:17:07Speaker 06

  That was a Shark Tank deal.

• 1:17:08Tom Segura?

  No way.

• 1:17:09Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm the only investor that they've ever had is Brian and Sean and crew. Um, and like I gave them, I forget maybe, um, $200,000 for 15% or something like that. And they're worth, you know, hundreds of probably half a billion dollars.

• 1:17:23Tom Segura?

  Wow.

• 1:17:23Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:17:24Tom Segura?

  So is that your biggest success? Is that the biggest one?

• 1:17:25Speaker 06

  Those two are the biggest. Another one, Mush Oats is crushing it.

• 1:17:29Tom Segura?

  Dude Wipes are everywhere, man.

• 1:17:30Speaker 06

  Everywhere. These guys are brilliant marketers, both of them. We have Dude Wipes here. Yeah. I knew I liked you guys.

• 1:17:36Tom Segura?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:17:37Speaker 06

  Now we just gotta get you some Beatbox, but.

• 1:17:39Tom Segura?

  Yeah, we'll get some Beatbox in here.

• 1:17:41Speaker 06

  But yeah.

• 1:17:41Tom Segura?

  Would you be interested in the, I don't know if you're willing to take risks in funding, uh, a porn shoot between a modest Walmart worker and a porn, a world famous porn star? To make a dream come true?

• 1:17:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Have you gotten in that business yet?

• 1:17:56Speaker 06

  No.

• 1:17:57Tom Segura?

  Okay, alright.

• 1:17:58Speaker 06

  No.

• 1:17:58Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fair enough.

• 1:17:59Tom Segura?

  He's looking for a way out. He was looking for an out.

• 1:18:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  What on Shark Tank, what is the dumbest pitch you've ever?

• 1:18:06Tom Segura?

  His brain right now is just shifting.

• 1:18:08Speaker 06

  So many, so, so many. Like, there was one that came on years ago called Taillights. And what it was, it was like a circular thing that had little lights flashing. And it was meant to be attached to the back of someone's jeans. For a girl, teenager in particular. Because, you know, shake your tail lights. This guy thought it was a great idea and it was great TV. And so he had a girl, 16, 17 year old girl who turned out to be his niece. And so I said to the girl, I'm like, would you wear this on a date? And she was just so conflicted because her face just dropped. Because it was a horrible idea. Nobody's gonna wear it on a date. They're probably long gone.

• 1:18:53Speaker 06

  Um, but yeah, that was one of the worst fart candles.

• 1:18:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, what, what? Hold on. Now you're speaking our language.

• 1:18:59Speaker 06

  There you go, right? Yeah. No, different flavored candles, but like, you know.

• 1:19:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Fart candles?

• 1:19:03Speaker 06

  Yeah, Spencer. Exactly. And when you shart instead of fart, dude wipes.

• 1:19:09Tom Segura?

  Dude wipes. There you go. So you get both covered.

• 1:19:12Speaker 06

  You get two for one, right?

• 1:19:13Tom Segura?

  I can't believe you didn't do fart candles, bro.

• 1:19:14Speaker 06

  No. There was like awakened bacon. Like in the early days of Shark Tank, they were a lot sillier. Because people didn't know who we were and what it was. There was another one where, um, there was an alarm clock that made bacon. So you were awakened to bacon.

• 1:19:29Tom Segura?

  That's pretty rad.

• 1:19:30Speaker 06

  Yeah, it was funny as hell, but you know, what if it caught fire or whatever?

• 1:19:34Tom Segura?

  Yeah, sure.

• 1:19:34Speaker 06

  Your hair's on fire.

• 1:19:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  How do you keep the bacon fresh too? Like, what? There's so many problems.

• 1:19:40Tom Segura?

  You know that also to develop the prototype, that guy ran that thing.

• 1:19:43Speaker 06

  Oh, the guy was great. Wait.

• 1:19:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  The Waken Bacon.

• 1:19:47Speaker 06

  The Waken Bacon, is he still, oh my god.

• 1:19:52Tom Segura?

  He did, he was like, his whole story is like Mark Cuban told me no.

• 1:19:57Speaker 06

  Awaken, but season two, yeah, that's when I was on as a guest.

• 1:20:00Tom Segura?

  That's hilarious.

• 1:20:02Speaker 06

  Oh my god, and then there's the ones that should have been good, like, um, there's one breathometer. And it was great, it was a personal, um, alcohol, um, detector.

• 1:20:13Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's smart.

• 1:20:14Speaker 06

  To tell your blood, um, level, this guy, right? And made perfect sense, we all got in, you see a picture with me and him. I started looking at his, a, um, at his, um, Instagram feed, right after we gave him the money, we gave him a lot of money. And he's on this island, at this party, and this party, and I'm like, dude, right, what?

• 1:20:36Tom Segura?

  What are you doing?

• 1:20:36Speaker 06

  What are you doing, you're supposed, oh, I'm marketing. Whole thing crashed and burned, yeah, and had other problems, but it was such a great idea and it just didn't make it.

• 1:20:46Tom Segura?

  Yeah, and also, you can also see the ones too where, I've seen ones where you guys are super competitive, like you guys are really wanting it.

• 1:20:52Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:20:53Tom Segura?

  And then the person just talks themselves out of any deal.

• 1:20:58Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:20:58Tom Segura?

  But also doesn't then take the business into something, like, like sometimes people go, I don't want, I, I'm just actually not gonna do this deal with you guys.

• 1:21:05Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:21:06Tom Segura?

  And they're able to have their business still succeed.

• 1:21:09Speaker 06

  Right, right, right.

• 1:21:10Tom Segura?

  But the ones who kind of self implode after it, that's a bummer to watch.

• 1:21:14Speaker 06

  No, I mean, and it happens, right, because there's, there's people that, and, and in life too, off the shark tank, where you oversell. You know, and there's times that we'll say to them, just shut up.

• 1:21:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:25Speaker 06

  You have our interest, and the more you talk, the worse it gets.

• 1:21:27Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 1:21:28Speaker 06

  You know, you're talking yourself out of a deal.

• 1:21:30Tom Segura?

  It's like a guy trying to get laid.

• 1:21:31Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:21:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  God damn, yeah.

• 1:21:32Speaker 06

  Say anything, right?

• 1:21:34Tom Segura?

  Like, just shut up.

• 1:21:34Speaker 06

  Shut up.

• 1:21:35Christina Pazsitzky?

  They don't wanna give away equity, that's always the thing.

• 1:21:37Speaker 06

  You're talking about the guy trying to get laid?

• 1:21:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  No.

• 1:21:41Tom Segura?

  I'm still working on that.

• 1:21:42Speaker 06

  There's a new angle, right? That's a new angle.

• 1:21:44Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:45Christina Pazsitzky?

  They never want to give anything to get stuff.

• 1:21:47Speaker 06

  Well, no, and that's also a tell, right? So when a company comes in and they want $500,000 for 2%.

• 1:21:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:52Speaker 06

  They know how the game is played.

• 1:21:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:54Speaker 06

  And what's worse is like, they practice their pitches over and over and over again with the producers. Because it's hard to come on knowing you're on national television. And millions and millions of people are going to be watching, so they practice it. And part of it is what your ask is. And so the producers basically will tell, you can't specifically tell them yes or no. But they'll say, you know, when you're practicing, this is probably better. And they'll practice it. So it was, you know, $100,000 for 3%, right? Like, okay, you can get along with that. And then they'll come on and say $500,000 for 2%.

• 1:22:23Tom Segura?

  Oh, in the moment.

• 1:22:24Speaker 06

  In the moment, they'll say it, and we're just like, no, it's not, you know.

• 1:22:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's not worth your time.

• 1:22:28Speaker 06

  No, that's, that's like a $25 million valuation. You have $17 in sales.

• 1:22:32Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:22:32Speaker 06

  You know, you love your company, but, you know, it's, it's not going to work.

• 1:22:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, delusional.

• 1:22:37Tom Segura?

  One of the things I've, I've always, because I've heard this topic discussed so much, but I've never actually had the conversation with someone. Is there's this thing related, I guess you could say, to the giving pledge. Where like, super wealthy people pledge to give away the majority of their fortune.

• 1:22:52Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:22:52Tom Segura?

  But how do you feel about, I've always wondered, when you have the money, everybody wants to leave things for their kids.

• 1:22:58Speaker 06

  Right.

• 1:22:58Tom Segura?

  Do you feel like you, you're throwing off, um, someone's development? If you go like, by the way, one day you're going to get like several billion dollars.

• 1:23:08Speaker 06

  Well, they're smart, they know how to do the math.

• 1:23:10Tom Segura?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:23:11Speaker 06

  My bigger worries are they're going to knock me off to get.

• 1:23:13Tom Segura?

  Right, right.

• 1:23:14Speaker 06

  No, it, it is something I think about. My wife talked, my wife and I talk about all the time because how much is too much?

• 1:23:19Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:20Speaker 06

  Right? But at the same time, you want them to be able to survive it. And so, um, like particularly when I sold the Mavs, um, we, I kind of organized it so that they'll be okay, but not so much that they can just go buy planes and stuff.

• 1:23:34Tom Segura?

  Right, okay, so it is a consideration, right?

• 1:23:36Speaker 06

  Oh yeah, for sure. And then there's certain things that they have to do, certain, you know, benchmarks, graduate, you know, not do certain things and, you know, like that.

• 1:23:45Tom Segura?

  Yeah, okay. Yeah, because I mean, sometimes you see, obviously like in the news, like so and so inherited like $40 billion.

• 1:23:53Speaker 06

  Yeah, and it's like.

• 1:23:56Speaker 06

  It's scary.

• 1:23:57Tom Segura?

  Scary.

• 1:23:57Speaker 06

  You know, because I don't want, you know, I've seen, you know, I've watched secession.

• 1:24:01Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:02Speaker 06

  You know, you don't want, I don't want that for my kids. I don't want it to be a battle. And that's one of the reasons I sold the Mavs.

• 1:24:07Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:07Speaker 06

  Really? Oh, yeah, for sure. Like, all the backlash from the Luca trade. What if they made a mistake like that? They took over and they made a mistake like that.

• 1:24:16Tom Segura?

  And they're just hated.

• 1:24:19Speaker 06

  They may not have a problem with it, like, but it would tear me apart.

• 1:24:23Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:23Speaker 06

  You know, and I want them to go on their own path.

• 1:24:26Tom Segura?

  Yes, that's the part I'm thinking of, just the path.

• 1:24:29Speaker 06

  Yeah, whatever it may be, I want them to be themselves. I don't want them to be Mark Cuban's kid for their entire life.

• 1:24:35Tom Segura?

  Well, I think that there's like an amount of money that somebody can inherit where you have distorted the path.

• 1:24:41Speaker 06

  Yeah, because a hundred percent, right? Because, you know, at some level, you want them to understand the value of money.

• 1:24:50Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:50Speaker 06

  And not it just to be something that's just there all the time because one not.

• 1:24:55Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:57Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:24:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Mark, have you had fun with your money?

• 1:25:00Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:25:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  What's the, what's the best? What do you tell me, tell me the fun stuff?

• 1:25:03Speaker 06

  Um, I mean, owning the Mavs, winning the championship, running on the court on the game winner. Um, no longer stressing about bills. Um, being able to go, you know, I mean, even like when I was younger before, you know, I had a B next to my name. I bought a lifetime pass on American Airlines and just being able to, you know, be at a bar, meet somebody or go call a friend and say, let's go to Barcelona. Let's go to, you know, wherever. Yeah, I mean, but more.

• 1:25:33Tom Segura?

  Do you do impromptu trips a lot? Like, do you go?

• 1:25:35Speaker 06

  Not so much anymore because of the businesses and kids, right?

• 1:25:38Tom Segura?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:25:38Speaker 06

  You know?

• 1:25:39Tom Segura?

  But at one point you were like, let's just go.

• 1:25:40Speaker 06

  Let's go. When I was single, I was like, hell no, let's go.

• 1:25:43Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:43Speaker 06

  And it was just like boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, all the time. Um, but now it's just more like stress reduction.

• 1:25:50Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:50Speaker 06

  You know, I can focus on my kids, focus on cost plus, and it opens the door. You know, I would say. It's not so much the impromptu stuff that's rewarding, but with cost plus drugs, I'm getting emails almost every day saying, you know, I'll tell you one I got two weeks ago, where somebody sent me an email saying, um, I have cancer. And when I went to the pharmacy, they told me it was going to be $900 a month for this, this medication I needed. And I literally decided that I'd rather die sooner than put the, the financial stress on my wife and family.

• 1:26:25Tom Segura?

  Wow.

• 1:26:26Speaker 06

  And then I found out about costplusdrugs.com and instead of $900, it was like $73.

• 1:26:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:31Speaker 06

  And now we can afford it.

• 1:26:32Tom Segura?

  Crazy.

• 1:26:32Speaker 06

  That shit feels good.

• 1:26:33Tom Segura?

  That feels good.

• 1:26:34Speaker 06

  That feels really good and that happens all the time. I had a friend from college and, um, got, they got in touch with me and he was on this drug, Droxodopa, and he lost his insurance. And he called up the local pharmacy, the big, one of the big chains. It was going to be $10,000 every three months. Our price is $73 a month and it's gone down since then. And so when I, I was in Nashville and somebody walked up to me and just started hugging me and crying.

• 1:26:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, it's so nice.

• 1:27:00Speaker 06

  I mean, what's better than that?

• 1:27:01Tom Segura?

  What, I mean, this system is so fucked though.

• 1:27:03Speaker 06

  So fucked, but we're fixing it. Yeah. We're literally are changing it.

• 1:27:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wow. Um, how do you wind down at night? You sound like you're pretty mentally active.

• 1:27:11Tom Segura?

  Like what is down to like, for a guy that's so driven and I, and I don't think there's anything wrong, by the way, with like the fact that somebody loves to work and like loves to do things.

• 1:27:19Speaker 06

  I mean, it's not hard work. It's not like I'm sweating my nuts off all day, all the time.

• 1:27:22Tom Segura?

  But I'm saying you love, here's the thing, you love being in the game.

• 1:27:26Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:27:26Tom Segura?

  Like, and for you, the thrill of competition exists in business.

• 1:27:30Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:27:30Tom Segura?

  And like, you want to get involved. I get it. Like, I totally get it. But is there a downtime fun thing that's not?

• 1:27:37Speaker 06

  Yeah, I go to the gym. I work out. Yeah. Hang out with my kids, go do their, you know, go to their games.

• 1:27:42Tom Segura?

  You guys do family trips too?

• 1:27:44Speaker 06

  Not so much because they're teenagers. They decide, right?

• 1:27:46Tom Segura?

  Oh, right.

• 1:27:46Speaker 06

  You know, um, but when we could force them to go, force, they call it force family fun.

• 1:27:50Tom Segura?

  See, we gotta force them for a while.

• 1:27:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:27:52Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:27:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, I will.

• 1:27:53Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:27:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  Right now they want to be with us.

• 1:27:56Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  And I love six and nine.

• 1:27:57Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah. The perfect age. Yeah.

• 1:27:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, it's so fun.

• 1:28:00Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:28:00Christina Pazsitzky?

  We're going to go to London next week for Tommy's shows and I'm just, I like to travel with them. I think it's so important to learn the world.

• 1:28:07Tom Segura?

  Beautiful. The six year old will still hold my hand.

• 1:28:09Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 1:28:11Tom Segura?

  And I, you tell yourself, you're like, this isn't going to last.

• 1:28:13Speaker 06

  Oh, for sure. Right? And you know, my, my son gave me a hug, any hug, right? Like my favorite word in the universe is dad.

• 1:28:20Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:21Speaker 06

  Right? Just, you know, dad this, even if it's dad, you know, it doesn't matter.

• 1:28:25Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:25Speaker 06

  You know, it's still.

• 1:28:27Speaker 06

  Dad.

• 1:28:27Christina Pazsitzky?

  Are you a religious guy?

• 1:28:28Speaker 06

  No.

• 1:28:29Christina Pazsitzky?

  No.

• 1:28:29Speaker 06

  No.

• 1:28:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  I know you're Jewish.

• 1:28:30Speaker 06

  I'm Jewish, yeah. Yeah, I mean, I'm culturally religious, if you will, but I'm not going to services.

• 1:28:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  No. And what do you watch at night? What are you watching?

• 1:28:38Speaker 06

  Um, not, you know, Mavs games, but other than Mavs games, um.

• 1:28:44Christina Pazsitzky?

  Murder? You watching Charles Manson docs?

• 1:28:46Speaker 06

  No, no, I don't get into the docs, yeah. You know, what, I, of, in the middle of Night Agent, um.

• 1:28:54Christina Pazsitzky?

  What's that?

• 1:28:55Speaker 06

  On Netflix, um.

• 1:28:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, I've.

• 1:28:57Tom Segura?

  I'll give you some better ones.

• 1:28:59Speaker 06

  Yeah, they're, they're all good, right? It's just like.

• 1:29:00Tom Segura?

  Have you watched The Agency yet?

• 1:29:02Speaker 06

  No, but my wife did.

• 1:29:03Tom Segura?

  The Agency is fantastic.

• 1:29:05Speaker 06

  Like, for me, like, if I can't make it to the gym and I'm on the bike at home, that's typically when I watch shows. It's just anything to, you know, distract me while I'm working out.

• 1:29:13Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Speaking of working out, if you're wealthy, is there any excuse to be out of shape?

• 1:29:20Speaker 06

  Yeah, because some people go to dinners and, you know, go do all the fancy nine-course dinners that are 9,000 calories.

• 1:29:26Tom Segura?

  But shouldn't, like, if somebody with those resources, isn't there, like, like, you look great.

• 1:29:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yes, you take care of yourself.

• 1:29:32Tom Segura?

  Shouldn't there be a certain bar where it's like, after you get this many zeros, like, next to your name, they're like, hey, man, you gotta start bringing.

• 1:29:39Speaker 06

  No, no, no, it's not even that, because it's like, I was fat for a while, I mean, definitely chubby, um, and it's because I was taking advantage of every opportunity and, like, there were no nights off.

• 1:29:49Tom Segura?

  Right, yeah, yeah.

• 1:29:50Speaker 06

  It was just like going out, so I went from being like ripped to being, you know, Porky Pig.

• 1:29:57Speaker 06

  And it was just like, because I was going out and, you know, and the pants were getting a little tighter and then, but then when you get older, it's more just because of age, right? Because the consequences are a lot worse.

• 1:30:06Tom Segura?

  They are.

• 1:30:07Speaker 06

  You know, and so it's like, okay, let me figure out what's best for me and the best way to stay in shape and, and plus, you know, you know, I don't drink as much as I used to and that just made it a lot easier.

• 1:30:17Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, you like to drink. I like to drink too, but I got breast cancer, so now I can't.

• 1:30:22Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 1:30:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm okay, though. I'm totally healed. I'm good.

• 1:30:24Speaker 06

  Oh, good, good, good, good, good.

• 1:30:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, but, um, yeah, it's a, it's a carcinogen. I'm so bummed because I love alcohol.

• 1:30:29Speaker 06

  You know, there's a lot to be said for, especially when there's a bottle right here. Your willpower is really good.

• 1:30:34Christina Pazsitzky?

  What did you drink? What was your jam?

• 1:30:36Speaker 06

  Um, usually just beer, Bud Light, Miller Lite.

• 1:30:39Christina Pazsitzky?

  You are from Pittsburgh.

• 1:30:40Speaker 06

  Yeah, right. I- Iron City Light, if I'm in Pittsburgh.

• 1:30:43Tom Segura?

  Hell, yeah.

• 1:30:43Speaker 06

  Hell, yeah. Um, but then Tito's and soda, you know? But only because of the calories, not because I'm a big, you know, I'm not a wine drinker.

• 1:30:50Tom Segura?

  Osos and soda.

• 1:30:51Speaker 06

  Osos and soda, exactly.

• 1:30:52Tom Segura?

  Texas made, by the way.

• 1:30:53Speaker 06

  All the better reason. I never heard of Tito's. I've heard of Osos and soda.

• 1:30:57Tom Segura?

  By the way.

• 1:31:01Speaker 06

  When I drink alcohol, it's only Osos. And every now and then I'll add soda.

• 1:31:07Tom Segura?

  Yeah, there you go. That's fine. I like it on ice, too.

• 1:31:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  But it sounds like you're not in the trap of like rich guy stuff where stuff isn't exciting anymore. Like, for instance, we found that you can pay a Russian company to take you out on a boat and hunt Somali pirates. Is that something you would be interested in doing?

• 1:31:25Speaker 06

  Like to go shoot them and kill them?

• 1:31:26Tom Segura?

  Well, here's the thing. It's just rolling the dice. So what it is.

• 1:31:29Speaker 06

  Do they know that the Somali pirates have guns and can shoot back?

• 1:31:33Tom Segura?

  Well, it's the, you know, you Russians are wild, bro. So what they do is you gotta pay between seventy-five hundred and I think twelve thousand dollars to go on a boat that will pass through the strait that usually has Somali pirates.

• 1:31:47Speaker 06

  Do they play Russian roulette while they're waiting?

• 1:31:49Tom Segura?

  And then you just have there like a fifty caliber and like an RPG. And then they're like, if you see one, let her rip, you know? So, yeah, it's.

• 1:32:00Speaker 06

  No, that is not like.

• 1:32:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're not into that?

• 1:32:02Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  Forced family fun?

• 1:32:04Speaker 06

  That's not the fun. Hey, kids, guys, where we're going.

• 1:32:07Tom Segura?

  That would be a fun Cuban family trip.

• 1:32:09Speaker 06

  Shoot away, right?

• 1:32:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  They would love that. Or hunting endangered species. You guys don't want to do that?

• 1:32:13Speaker 06

  No.

• 1:32:14Tom Segura?

  See? You're so grounded, man.

• 1:32:17Speaker 06

  That's the definition of grounded. Not wanting to shoot Somali pirates.

• 1:32:20Tom Segura?

  The thing is that the, with the, I mean, those are extreme examples, but I think the thing that is like refreshing in a way is that so many people or people that a lot of times have a lot of money, there's just like this entitlement that comes with it. Like, I should be able to do it. And we see it. We see it, you know, very public people like that.

• 1:32:37Speaker 06

  That's just not my style. Um, but I mean, there's a lot of people who think I'm a dick, right? And it's just like more, but I like to challenge people intellectually, right? I like to bully up, you know, not bully down, but bully up.

• 1:32:48Tom Segura?

  You get into some real, uh, ex wars. You, you definitely have, have it out with people. You let people.

• 1:32:55Speaker 06

  Come back at me. Oh, yeah, I don't mind. Right. Challenge me. You know, if you can change my mind, fine. I'm here to learn. But I like that challenge. So that's probably my other time killer. But I'm more on Blue Sky now than I am on X.

• 1:33:09Tom Segura?

  What's Blue Sky?

• 1:33:09Speaker 06

  Blue Sky is kind of an alternative and I'm M Cuban there. They've got like thirty three million users, but we're.

• 1:33:15Tom Segura?

  It's a social media platform?

• 1:33:17Speaker 06

  It's like the guy who started Twitter started on Blue Sky. And it's more extensible. Yeah, Jack did, yeah. And so, yeah, I'm on there all the time. But it leans where Twitter leans right, Blue Sky leans left.

• 1:33:31Tom Segura?

  I got you.

• 1:33:32Speaker 06

  If I want to argue politics, Republican politics, I'll be on X. If I want to, you know, argue or support Democratic politics, I'll be on Blue Sky.

• 1:33:41Tom Segura?

  And is it completely like far fetched to believe that you would run for office?

• 1:33:45Speaker 06

  Yeah, completely.

• 1:33:46Tom Segura?

  Completely.

• 1:33:47Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:33:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  No.

• 1:33:47Tom Segura?

  Cause there was.

• 1:33:48Speaker 06

  I wouldn't put my family through that.

• 1:33:49Tom Segura?

  That's, that's why. But without the family.

• 1:33:52Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah. If I was single, it'd be like, let's go.

• 1:33:53Tom Segura?

  Let's go.

• 1:33:54Speaker 06

  Yeah, let's go because, yeah, it didn't matter.

• 1:33:56Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's so true. It just destroys your, your private life. Terrible.

• 1:34:01Speaker 06

  I mean, yeah, I have no private life as it is, but just like the grief. I mean, I sold the Mavs because I just told you I didn't want them to go through the shit, right? Now imagine running for president.

• 1:34:11Tom Segura?

  Oh, my God. There's nothing that can prepare anyone for that, really.

• 1:34:14Speaker 06

  No, no, no. And I could deal with it. Yeah, I could deal with it, but it's not even a job that I really want.

• 1:34:20Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:21Speaker 06

  You know? And plus with, with healthcare and the thing we're working on there, if I can, you know, change healthcare.

• 1:34:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's true.

• 1:34:27Speaker 06

  I'm happy with that.

• 1:34:28Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:28Speaker 06

  Cause that, I mean, no one likes healthcare the way it is.

• 1:34:30Tom Segura?

  No.

• 1:34:31Speaker 06

  Right? So it's like, okay, that's a win. That, that's, that's good for the legacy.

• 1:34:36Tom Segura?

  What's your thing on, because you've also been pretty outspoken about AI, right? It's like, so there's so many possibilities.

• 1:34:44Speaker 06

  Yeah, there's no limit.

• 1:34:46Tom Segura?

  There's no limit. Like in our business, there's a lot of.

• 1:34:51Tom Segura?

  I would say on the creative side, there's a lot of apprehension resistance. People are not thrilled with the idea.

• 1:34:56Speaker 06

  No, it should be the opposite.

• 1:34:57Tom Segura?

  But they're not because what the reason, one of the main reasons is that, you know, like studios, for instance, could and have had AI do treatments, write-ups of things where writers then see this as like a threat.

• 1:35:12Speaker 06

  No, because you still need to be able to tell a story.

• 1:35:14Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:15Speaker 06

  And you still need to know the beginning, middle and end.

• 1:35:17Tom Segura?

  True.

• 1:35:18Speaker 06

  And you still need to know your audience. And AI can propose a million things in a second. But then somebody's got to go through and decide what they're going to put their money into.

• 1:35:27Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 1:35:27Speaker 06

  AI is not going to, you know, hit your bank account and then produce a movie for you, produce a podcast or whatever.

• 1:35:32Tom Segura?

  Sure.

• 1:35:32Speaker 06

  And using the technology, you guys could extend. So like, have you guys looked at Notebook LM?

• 1:35:38Tom Segura?

  No.

• 1:35:39Speaker 06

  Oh, my God. So bring up Notebook LM, the podcast feature.

• 1:35:43Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 1:35:43Speaker 06

  It is insane. So literally like you've got your rundown list. You could feed your rundown list into it and have it go look up things and do summaries of all those things and then have it create a podcast.

• 1:35:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  What?

• 1:35:57Speaker 06

  And the podcast sounds like

• 1:36:00Speaker 06

  real.

• 1:36:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  Wait, I don't understand. So like, I'm into listening to an advice podcast. I'm listening to Joe Rogan. I'm listening to whatever murder podcast. And it mashes the three together?

• 1:36:09Speaker 06

  No, no, no, no, no. So like, you just want to do a general podcast like this about all the different topics, like a traditional radio show type thing, right? And you take your rundown list like you guys have.

• 1:36:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, oh, right.

• 1:36:21Speaker 06

  And you know, like you guys had all your topics.

• 1:36:22Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, I see what you're saying. Sorry.

• 1:36:23Speaker 06

  And so all your topics, right? And then you send it out and say, do the homework on these with.

• 1:36:30Christina Pazsitzky?

  We should do that.

• 1:36:31Speaker 06

  And then put it in there and it'll have these two people talking just like we're talking.

• 1:36:36Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, my God.

• 1:36:36Speaker 06

  Oh, and it's insane. It's insane. Like for business, it's great because like you can take your training manuals or onboarding manuals, all these different things. And because kids particularly, they don't want to read. They just want to listen. So you can be walking, taking your walk or on a bike or whatever, and listening to, you know, your training guidelines that sounds like a regular podcast and they make it entertaining. But that sounds kind of scary on one end, but you can start training it to do the things that you want it to do with your voices. So if you wanted to pick the topics and fill in the information you want discussed in this podcast, instead of having one and you know, the show's the way you have now, you can add a thousand of them.

• 1:37:17Christina Pazsitzky?

  That's amazing.

• 1:37:18Speaker 06

  Yeah, and I mean, it's just, what's this?

• 1:37:20Tom Segura?

  This is an actual audio example of it?

• 1:37:22Speaker 06

  Uh huh.

• 1:37:22Tom Segura?

  Ever feel like you're just drowning in information?

• 1:37:25Speaker 04

  Oh, tell me about it.

• 1:37:26Speaker 06

  These are two people.

• 1:37:26Tom Segura?

  Research papers, articles.

• 1:37:28Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:37:29Tom Segura?

  Like even a whole shelf of books on one topic.

• 1:37:31Speaker 04

  Right.

• 1:37:32Tom Segura?

  And you just need to like get a handle on it all.

• 1:37:34Speaker 04

  It's a struggle.

• 1:37:35Tom Segura?

  Yeah, and there's gotta be a better way.

• 1:37:37Speaker 04

  Oh, there definitely is.

• 1:37:39Tom Segura?

  Well, that's what we're diving into today.

• 1:37:40Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:37:41Tom Segura?

  Notebook LM.

• 1:37:42Speaker 04

  Interesting.

• 1:37:43Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, my god.

• 1:37:44Tom Segura?

  It's this experimental AI research assistant thing Google's come up with.

• 1:37:48Speaker 04

  Really fascinating stuff.

• 1:37:50Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:37:51Speaker 06

  Literally, so you know, these are not real people.

• 1:37:53Tom Segura?

  Right, these are AI voices.

• 1:37:55Speaker 06

  These are AI voices that could be your voice.

• 1:37:57Christina Pazsitzky?

  Let's do a YMH one.

• 1:37:58Tom Segura?

  We should do a full episode.

• 1:37:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  With our stupid topics.

• 1:38:00Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:01Speaker 04

  When you're in London, we just put out this.

• 1:38:02Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:03Christina Pazsitzky?

  A rundown.

• 1:38:04Tom Segura?

  I actually like this idea.

• 1:38:05Speaker 06

  It's insane.

• 1:38:06Tom Segura?

  Do you then, I mean, it feels like the natural thing for anybody in business to do is figure out how AI can help these different parts, right?

• 1:38:14Speaker 06

  Yes, I mean, look what you're using right now, right? So, you know, you guys have been in radio in the industry forever, right? And think going back when you had your first, you know, it used to be they played records.

• 1:38:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:24Speaker 06

  And there was a DJ that just spoke. And then all of a sudden, there were the different playback systems, right?

• 1:38:30Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:30Speaker 06

  And then you had editing and then, you know, the DJs were editing right on the spot, different songs. Technology's influenced every industry always. And, you know, it, it's no different now, but the difference is like going back to PCs and then software and going from analog to digital. You could try and kind of extrapolate where things were going.

• 1:38:50Tom Segura?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:38:50Speaker 06

  With AI, there's no way you would have anticipated what we just heard.

• 1:38:54Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 1:38:54Speaker 06

  You know, and it goes into a thousand, a zillion different directions.

• 1:38:58Tom Segura?

  Are you investing heavily in AI?

• 1:39:00Speaker 06

  Yeah, I mean, but more importantly, just trying to learn it.

• 1:39:03Tom Segura?

  Learn what the possibilities are.

• 1:39:04Speaker 06

  Right, because like for kids, they're gonna grow up, this will be native to them.

• 1:39:08Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:39:08Speaker 06

  For us, we've got to put in the effort to learn, but like on my Instagram feed now, it, it used to be, you know, sports, sports, sports, sports, business, but whatever. Now it's AI hack, AI hack, AI hack, AI hack, new AI software, new AI software. Cause it's changing so rapidly, but it's, to me, it's fun.

• 1:39:25Tom Segura?

  It's fun to learn, yeah. That's very cool. We should have fun with that.

• 1:39:28Speaker 06

  You can, right? So we're taking a break, now we have, you know.

• 1:39:32Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:39:32Speaker 06

  You know.

• 1:39:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  You know, it's interesting, I'm listening to you speak and the way that your mind works. It seems to me that you're always looking towards the future, like you're looking for what's. Undiscovered yet. Is that how your business mind works?

• 1:39:46Speaker 06

  A hundred percent. Yeah. First one to bring it up. Steve Jobs called everything, said everything is a remix. Right? Well, you take what's already in place and then you add whatever value you can add to it to get it to the next place. You know, when we started AudioNet, which was the first streaming company, it was like, okay, there's, here's the internet. And here's how we listen to Indiana basketball over distances because the internet solves that. You know, HD, well, here's high definition. It's all going, TV's going digital. And even though the, the first high definition televisions in two thousand and one, when we started HD, HD net, were twenty five thousand dollars for a screen like that.

• 1:40:21Tom Segura?

  God.

• 1:40:22Speaker 06

  We knew, I knew the price was coming down.

• 1:40:24Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:40:24Speaker 06

  Right? So it was just a question of when. Now with this, with AI, it's not a question of if it's going to change things. The only question is how.

• 1:40:30Tom Segura?

  How.

• 1:40:30Speaker 06

  And who's going to do it?

• 1:40:31Tom Segura?

  And so by informing yourself, you could be.

• 1:40:34Speaker 06

  I can figure it out.

• 1:40:34Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:40:35Speaker 06

  I can stay ahead. So I can say, okay, this is how this works. So now, like what we just talked about. Once I saw Notebook LM and the podcast feature, it wasn't, okay, what's going to happen to podcasters? It was where are there situations where people don't want to read? But like to consume information via audio and/or video. Because you, when you talk to kids today, they, they're not big readers.

• 1:40:59Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:00Speaker 06

  You know, your kids aren't, as much as you're going to want them to read.

• 1:41:03Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:03Speaker 06

  More stuff is going to be, it's different, you know, and it's not that they're not learning.

• 1:41:07Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:08Speaker 06

  It's that they're learning differently.

• 1:41:09Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:09Speaker 06

  Right? And so for kids who are learning differently, what can we do?

• 1:41:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  I like that. I like that idea, especially shit that you don't want to read, like manuals to technical things.

• 1:41:20Speaker 06

  Well, even, you know, stuff like to get your rundown. So you literally could use Notebook LM and just Gemini. Or ChatGPT or whatever, and they have just, you can just list it and just say, do me a research summary of all these topics using the latest news. Like Chat, ChatGPT has these task features where they'll go out and they'll look it up, just like Google Alerts would work. And you can have them summarize it for all the topics you're interested in. Or you can say, give me the hottest twenty topics. That are being discussed across the internet and see what it comes back with to see, make sure you're not missing anything.

• 1:41:58Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:59Speaker 06

  Right, because it takes time for you to research all this and

• 1:42:01Tom Segura?

  For sure.

• 1:42:01Speaker 06

  You've got to dig in and you've got all your sources.

• 1:42:04Tom Segura?

  Having a research assistant seems like a

• 1:42:06Speaker 06

  It's brilliant. It's brilliant and it'll save you so much time. And so learning how to use these things. Okay, what are the number one trending topics on Twitter, on Blue Sky, on Instagram? What are the number one hashtags on Instagram?

• 1:42:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  You do this? This is how you do your research?

• 1:42:22Speaker 06

  No, but I could.

• 1:42:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:42:24Speaker 06

  I want to know what allows me to do it. And so when I'm, when I'm trying to look at um, an industry or a company or I'm doing something. Then I'll go on there and I'll, you know, now the research capabilities are just blowing up. It's moving so fast. So there's tools like deep research and I'll say, okay, tell me about this company.

• 1:42:44Speaker 06

  Now, it doesn't get everything.

• 1:42:45Tom Segura?

  Right, but it gets

• 1:42:46Speaker 06

  But it's just like if you hired a research assistant, they're not going to get everything, right? So if you have an intern here or whoever and you're like, your social media, whoever, you know, your producers. And you say, find me all the hot topics and then you say, oh, I just heard about this. I was listening or I saw this and you add to it. It's no different. It's not going to be a hundred percent.

• 1:43:04Tom Segura?

  But it's

• 1:43:04Speaker 06

  But it saves you time.

• 1:43:05Tom Segura?

  That's true.

• 1:43:06Christina Pazsitzky?

  Dang dude. What topic can you talk about forever?

• 1:43:10Speaker 06

  Healthcare these days. I mean, I could go all day on healthcare.

• 1:43:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:14Speaker 06

  It's just like, that's where my brain is right now because I want to change it. And everybody thinks it's impossible to change, but it's not. It's actually, healthcare is really simple. You know, you go to the doctor and they prescribe you a medication or don't. You go to the doctor, you know, they say you're fine. Maybe you need some more, you know, um, care for whatever. And there's only two questions. What are they going to charge you and how are you going to pay for it?

• 1:43:39Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:39Speaker 06

  And those two questions have been so complicated by everybody that it's like, why is it like this? And so my whole mission and cost, starting with cost plus, and we're doing this thing called, called cost plus wellness for the healthcare side. It's just to simplify healthcare by moving all these extraneous companies out.

• 1:43:56Tom Segura?

  They must fucking hate you.

• 1:43:57Speaker 06

  Oh, they hate me. They hate me. You just hear the shit they've said. Um, but because they know that when you remove these pieces. It's actually not hard.

• 1:44:07Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 1:44:07Speaker 06

  You know, and so now

• 1:44:08Tom Segura?

  Overcomplicated.

• 1:44:09Speaker 06

  It's overcomplicated and The CEOs who run, who make the decisions on health, self-employ, there's companies that self-insure, meaning they don't use the insurance component of insurance companies, they take on that risk themselves. And I'm going to them and saying, "Look, you're getting ripped off. You know, you're paying too much, you're not getting the care you need, you're getting pushed in these directions that you shouldn't go." And they're like, "I didn't know that." And so I'm just spending all this time educating CEOs and each one that I get to change is one step closer to the whole system. And so changing, and that's what I'm doing.

• 1:44:44Tom Segura?

  That's an awesome mission.

• 1:44:45Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:44:46Tom Segura?

  How would you change, this is completely not as important, but would you change anything in basketball today?

• 1:44:52Speaker 06

  Oh, there's a ton of shit I would change.

• 1:44:53Tom Segura?

  What's like a top three or whatever, or top one?

• 1:44:57Speaker 06

  So, you know, people talk about too many threes.

• 1:44:59Tom Segura?

  That is a big criticism of today.

• 1:45:01Speaker 06

  So the question is why?

• 1:45:04Speaker 06

  If you're behind the three-point line and you're shooting three, a defender, if they're even anywhere, if they're in the landing zone where your feet might come down, it's a foul. And that's three free throws.

• 1:45:16Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:16Speaker 06

  So in other words, the three-point shooter is so protected that they can't even put their feet anywhere near, the defender can't put their feet anywhere near it. You go an inch inside the three-point line, they can beat the shit out of you.

• 1:45:27Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:28Speaker 06

  And it's called incidental contact.

• 1:45:30Tom Segura?

  Right.

• 1:45:30Speaker 06

  You get closer to the basket, the more, the closer you get, the more,

• 1:45:34Tom Segura?

  Contact's allowed.

• 1:45:35Speaker 06

  Contact and abuse can happen. And so you've got to change that so that you call the game by the rules inside the line so that they're not so disadvantaged when you're shooting a shot inside the three-point line. And to compensate for that, now, you know, they've let offensive players like lower their shoulder and knock over defenders or knock them out of the way to get space, and that makes the game worse too.

• 1:45:59Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:59Speaker 06

  So whenever you see a drop, like Shay Gilchrist Alexander, you know, most likely the MVP.

• 1:46:04Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:04Speaker 06

  He gets down by the free throw line, boom, he's lowering his shoulder and taking a step back, and he's money. Five years ago, you couldn't lower your shoulder like that.

• 1:46:14Tom Segura?

  So we need some rule changes.

• 1:46:15Speaker 06

  You need some rule changes, yeah. Um, so you know, that to me, that that's one of the biggest, um, you know, Adam Silver talked about shortening the game. I believe it.

• 1:46:24Tom Segura?

  You believe it?

• 1:46:24Speaker 06

  Yeah, I believe in it. I really do because it's

• 1:46:27Tom Segura?

  Slightly.

• 1:46:28Speaker 06

  Yeah, to forty minutes.

• 1:46:28Tom Segura?

  Forty.

• 1:46:29Speaker 06

  Yeah, because it's a commitment to watch a whole NBA game. And we're so used to right now consuming NBA highlights on social media.

• 1:46:37Tom Segura?

  Totally.

• 1:46:38Speaker 06

  Like, your kids, if they're becoming sports fan, are they boys, girls?

• 1:46:42Tom Segura?

  They're boys.

• 1:46:42Speaker 06

  Boys, okay, so they're starting to, your oldest is starting to get into sports and follow it, right? And you're trying to keep them off of social media, but on YouTube, you'll see highlights and everything.

• 1:46:51Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:51Speaker 06

  Right? That's how they're going to grow up. Were you, you know, the three of us had family teams?

• 1:46:55Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 1:46:56Speaker 06

  You know, in Pittsburgh, it was the Steelers, it was the Pirates.

• 1:46:58Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 1:46:58Speaker 06

  No matter how bad, the Penguins, you know, in Dallas, it was the Mavericks and the Cowboys. Now it's players on social media.

• 1:47:04Tom Segura?

  Yes.

• 1:47:05Speaker 06

  And, you know, it's hard to commit to watching a full game. And if you look at ratings, there's an inverse relationship between the amount of actual playing time in the ratings. If you watch an NFL game, there's eleven to fifteen minutes of actual playing time.

• 1:47:19Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:19Speaker 06

  Like, you can watch a play, go grab your dude wipes, run to the restroom, use a whole package of dude wipes, come back before the next play.

• 1:47:27Tom Segura?

  It's crazy.

• 1:47:28Speaker 06

  You can't do that with the NBA.

• 1:47:29Tom Segura?

  Do you think that there's a real possibility that that could pass, that like, that they could reduce it?

• 1:47:33Speaker 06

  Not right the second, no, but you know, the way Adam is, and he's smart, the commissioner of the NBA, he socializes these things.

• 1:47:39Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:39Speaker 06

  And then over time, and just depends where the numbers go, because we have a brand new TV contract starting next year with a lot of streaming providers. And it'll be really, really interesting to see how it all plays out.

• 1:47:51Tom Segura?

  Now, one other thing we wanted to ask is that we, I, I really feel like, when you ask people, what's your favorite thing? There's always something.

• 1:48:02Tom Segura?

  False in there because people have this natural ambition to want to say the right thing.

• 1:48:10Speaker 06

  I agree with that.

• 1:48:11Tom Segura?

  More impressive thing.

• 1:48:11Speaker 06

  Yeah, I agree with that.

• 1:48:12Tom Segura?

  And that being that way, I think one of the, one of the people that you can only get like the most honest takes from is somebody who can actually afford to get.

• 1:48:21Speaker 06

  Back it up.

• 1:48:22Tom Segura?

  Yeah. So I wanted to ask a series of like, what's your favorite of this?

• 1:48:28Speaker 06

  Sure.

• 1:48:28Tom Segura?

  Where you just tell, whether it's expensive or not.

• 1:48:31Speaker 06

  Fire away.

• 1:48:32Tom Segura?

  So you're a basketball guy?

• 1:48:33Speaker 06

  Uh huh.

• 1:48:34Tom Segura?

  Favorite sneakers?

• 1:48:35Speaker 06

  Um Adidas.

• 1:48:37Tom Segura?

  Adidas.

• 1:48:38Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, okay. Let's see them. Which ones?

• 1:48:40Tom Segura?

  There you go.

• 1:48:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, those are good.

• 1:48:42Speaker 06

  Cause they're light for when I work out.

• 1:48:43Tom Segura?

  With Nike socks.

• 1:48:43Speaker 06

  With Nike socks that I get for free from the Mavericks.

• 1:48:45Tom Segura?

  There you go.

• 1:48:47Speaker 06

  But yeah, so when I go play basketball, shoot baskets, work out, I like, cause they're lighter.

• 1:48:52Tom Segura?

  Lighter.

• 1:48:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay.

• 1:48:53Tom Segura?

  Feel good. Okay. So there you go. It's an honest take. I believe you.

• 1:48:56Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:48:56Tom Segura?

  T-shirt. You're a famous T-shirt guy.

• 1:48:58Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:48:59Tom Segura?

  Do you have a favorite brand of T-shirt?

• 1:49:00Speaker 06

  Yeah, um, I like T-shirt classics.

• 1:49:04Tom Segura?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:49:04Speaker 06

  Um, and then, um, probably, yeah, that's, is that what I have? Yeah. And then I like Nike. I like this.

• 1:49:11Tom Segura?

  So not $2,300 Loro Piana of special.

• 1:49:14Speaker 06

  I do have some Loro Piana. I do have some. I can never pronounce, never remember their name, but I do have some, but not for T-shirts.

• 1:49:19Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 1:49:20Speaker 06

  Right? I have them for like dress shirts.

• 1:49:22Tom Segura?

  Oh, nice.

• 1:49:22Speaker 06

  Yeah. So they're my favorite dress shirts.

• 1:49:24Tom Segura?

  There you go.

• 1:49:24Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay.

• 1:49:25Tom Segura?

  See?

• 1:49:26Christina Pazsitzky?

  What about like pants and stuff?

• 1:49:27Speaker 06

  How do you pronounce it again?

• 1:49:28Tom Segura?

  Loro Piana.

• 1:49:28Speaker 06

  Loro Piana.

• 1:49:30Tom Segura?

  Piana.

• 1:49:30Speaker 06

  I never, never knew. I just knew it was like the Italian company that I ordered from.

• 1:49:33Christina Pazsitzky?

  Like suits and stuff. Where, where are you buying?

• 1:49:36Speaker 06

  So I don't really buy suits. So, um, when I'm shooting shark or was shooting Shark Tank, um, um, the wardrobe director, um, would come in and say, okay, time for new suits. And they'd bring someone. They'd measure me.

• 1:49:48Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:49:49Speaker 06

  And I like Tom Ford because I don't have to wear a belt. That's why I like Tom Ford. That was the only reason, right?

• 1:49:53Tom Segura?

  I don't want to worry about. Practical things. I like it.

• 1:49:55Speaker 06

  Because I didn't have to worry about bringing a belt. I like Tom Ford.

• 1:49:58Tom Segura?

  Okay. Tom Ford suit.

• 1:49:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  See, I believe you.

• 1:50:00Tom Segura?

  I do.

• 1:50:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  I believe you, Mark Cuban.

• 1:50:02Speaker 06

  It's the truth.

• 1:50:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Very down to earth. I'm trying to find chinks in the armor. I'm not seeing any.

• 1:50:06Tom Segura?

  This one means a lot to me. So please take your time.

• 1:50:08Christina Pazsitzky?

  I'm really trying, you guys.

• 1:50:09Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 1:50:10Christina Pazsitzky?

  I think he's a good spirit.

• 1:50:11Speaker 06

  Car?

• 1:50:12Tom Segura?

  Car.

• 1:50:12Christina Pazsitzky?

  Favorite car?

• 1:50:13Speaker 06

  Do you want to know what kind of car I drive?

• 1:50:14Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh shit.

• 1:50:15Tom Segura?

  Is it gonna upset me?

• 1:50:16Speaker 06

  Guess.

• 1:50:18Tom Segura?

  Fuck. By this smile.

• 1:50:20Christina Pazsitzky?

  Please not a praise.

• 1:50:20Tom Segura?

  I know it's not cool. You're telling me like, hey, guess something that's not cool. Fuck. Is it like a Honda Insight or something?

• 1:50:27Speaker 06

  It's a Kia EV6.

• 1:50:31Christina Pazsitzky?

  You're a Texan. What are you doing?

• 1:50:35Tom Segura?

  That's your favorite car?

• 1:50:36Speaker 06

  I like it. I have, I had it. I have a Tesla that I haven't sold, but um, I, for a lot of different reasons, I'm not, you know, went from the Kia to the Kia. And I've had it for like more than two years now.

• 1:50:47Tom Segura?

  This is it?

• 1:50:48Speaker 06

  This is it.

• 1:50:49Tom Segura?

  That's the only thing you drive?

• 1:50:51Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:50:51Tom Segura?

  Get the.

• 1:50:52Christina Pazsitzky?

  What?

• 1:50:53Speaker 06

  For real. I like it. I'm comfortable with it.

• 1:50:56Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 1:50:56Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh my God. What about, I mean, does your wife have a fancy car? Does she like something fancy?

• 1:51:01Speaker 06

  She's got a Range Rover.

• 1:51:02Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, that's nice. That's good.

• 1:51:04Speaker 06

  A hybrid Range Rover.

• 1:51:05Christina Pazsitzky?

  May I ask you though, why?

• 1:51:06Tom Segura?

  You've never gotten the supercar?

• 1:51:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, I've had a Hummer. I've had um, a Ferrari, enough, um.

• 1:51:13Tom Segura?

  Porsche.

• 1:51:14Speaker 06

  Lamborghini, um.

• 1:51:15Christina Pazsitzky?

  Okay, alright. Thank God, I was getting upset for a minute.

• 1:51:19Speaker 06

  But it was too loud and it was just like, um.

• 1:51:22Tom Segura?

  You know, those work as almost as well as Cialis. They can really get.

• 1:51:25Speaker 06

  Yeah, right? Yeah, I mean, I had, I had the Lamborghini recently and I got it because my kids gave me so much shit because Luca got one.

• 1:51:32Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:51:32Speaker 06

  Luca got the same one, um, and it was the SUV.

• 1:51:35Tom Segura?

  That's right, the Urus.

• 1:51:37Speaker 06

  Yeah, the Urus, right?

• 1:51:38Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:51:38Speaker 06

  And it was just too loud. And I had to get gas every 17 minutes.

• 1:51:41Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:51:41Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:51:42Speaker 06

  And so it was just like, no, but it was a cool car. It was, it was beautiful, um, but it was just too loud and too much of a gas hog. And my, yeah, my kids just gave me so much shit and they were going, oh, Luca's yours. Oh, they were like, you just want Luca to be your, your fourth child, don't you?

• 1:51:57Tom Segura?

  I don't blame you, dude.

• 1:51:59Speaker 06

  Yes, Luca got a car, you got a car.

• 1:52:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  So wait, so tell me about the Kia. What is it? What, what do you love?

• 1:52:04Tom Segura?

  It's all electric.

• 1:52:04Speaker 06

  It's all electric, yeah. And I just plug it in at night and it goes, has 300 mile range. Um, you know, it's got stereo system is good.

• 1:52:13Tom Segura?

  Dude, I just test drove the new all-electric Escalade.

• 1:52:17Speaker 06

  Uh huh.

• 1:52:17Tom Segura?

  It has a 450 mile range.

• 1:52:19Speaker 06

  That's what I'm talking about, right?

• 1:52:20Tom Segura?

  That's impressive.

• 1:52:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, because I'd look at that. I'm not like, I like the Kia and it's cheap, right? It's not like the price matters to me all that much. But the other thing I liked about it, it doesn't try to be too fancy.

• 1:52:31Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:52:31Speaker 06

  Right? It's got like, your turn signal is like, the turn signal, right? You turn it, whereas on the Tesla, you've got to find it and push the button. And that's like, while you're driving, you, you can't pay attention to the road as much. And, and so, and yeah, the best part is, so my 15 year old is learning to drive now. He's got his learner's permit. And so.

• 1:52:53Speaker 06

  We got my oldest daughter a Volvo when she learned to drive. And then when she went away to college, it was passed down to my middle daughter, who is gonna need it when she goes away to school. And so my son's talking about, okay dad, here's the kind of cars I want. I'm like, Kia baby. He's like, it's not cool dad. And I'm like, it's a nerd car. I'm like, yes, it is. Yes, it is.

• 1:53:15Tom Segura?

  He wanted some cool shit though, right?

• 1:53:16Speaker 06

  When I came down to Austin, he was like, dad, I need to, because you guys get so many hours in.

• 1:53:21Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:22Speaker 06

  Right? He goes, dad, you need to leave the Kia so I can practice. I'm like, oh, you're gonna practice on the Kia? So I had to take the Tesla.

• 1:53:29Tom Segura?

  Oh, nice. So you drove here?

• 1:53:31Speaker 06

  I didn't drive down to Austin, I drove to the airport.

• 1:53:32Tom Segura?

  Okay, I got you.

• 1:53:33Speaker 06

  I have a plane, remember? Oh, snap.

• 1:53:36Tom Segura?

  Oh, favorite plane?

• 1:53:38Speaker 06

  I've got actually the Bombardier and I've got a Gulfstream. My old Gulfstream that I bought originally. And so we kept it because the price wasn't worth selling.

• 1:53:50Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:50Speaker 06

  So as a backup, because the way the planes are, once they get a little bit older and the Bombardier is only like four years old, they have to go into maintenance more often. And so it's just easier to have. Four years, that's it.

• 1:54:00Tom Segura?

  The fucking most baller shit I've ever heard is my backup plane. I got a backup plane.

• 1:54:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, you know. Yeah, dog.

• 1:54:09Tom Segura?

  Sometimes when this is getting detailed, I take my backup plane.

• 1:54:14Speaker 06

  What's your death row meal? My death row meal, um,

• 1:54:20Speaker 06

  probably a big ass steak. Nice. Um, huge mountain of onion rings. Yeah. And then just something I'm just gonna cover with cheese. So it's like so slick.

• 1:54:34Tom Segura?

  Slow the heart down.

• 1:54:35Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, just like.

• 1:54:37Tom Segura?

  Do you get your steak Pittsburgh style?

• 1:54:38Speaker 06

  Um, no, like I don't even eat red meat anymore.

• 1:54:41Tom Segura?

  At all?

• 1:54:41Speaker 06

  No, like I was a vegetarian, straight vegetarian for a while, but I would starve when we'd go out to dinner. Like I was having to eat like only sides.

• 1:54:48Tom Segura?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:48Speaker 06

  So I went pescatarian.

• 1:54:50Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 1:54:50Speaker 06

  So now I can get salmon.

• 1:54:51Tom Segura?

  You have a favorite fish?

• 1:54:52Speaker 06

  Um, salmon's probably, yeah, sea bass is good, but mostly salmon.

• 1:54:55Tom Segura?

  Okay.

• 1:54:55Speaker 06

  Okay.

• 1:54:57Tom Segura?

  Well, I mean, those are the most important questions, I think, I'm gonna ask.

• 1:54:59Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, I mean.

• 1:55:00Speaker 06

  We've covered everything.

• 1:55:01Christina Pazsitzky?

  Everything.

• 1:55:02Tom Segura?

  You have a favorite movie?

• 1:55:03Speaker 06

  The Counting Two now.

• 1:55:04Tom Segura?

  The Counting Two. Shout out Ben Affleck.

• 1:55:06Speaker 06

  Yep, he was actually really good.

• 1:55:08Tom Segura?

  Danielle Pineda's in it.

• 1:55:09Christina Pazsitzky?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:55:09Tom Segura?

  She's a friend of ours.

• 1:55:10Speaker 06

  Yep.

• 1:55:11Tom Segura?

  She's a fantastic actress. Cool, I can't wait to see The Counting Two.

• 1:55:14Speaker 06

  It's actually really good.

• 1:55:15Tom Segura?

  All right, cool. And go check out Mermaid.

• 1:55:17Speaker 06

  I know I need to, but don't bring the kids.

• 1:55:19Christina Pazsitzky?

  Do not bring the kids.

• 1:55:20Tom Segura?

  I don't think you can bring the kids. I mean, you can bring the 21-year-old.

• 1:55:22Speaker 06

  Yeah, bring the wife.

• 1:55:23Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah.

• 1:55:24Tom Segura?

  All right.

• 1:55:25Christina Pazsitzky?

  Date night film.

• 1:55:26Tom Segura?

  Dude. It was a pleasure. Thank you for coming in.

• 1:55:29Speaker 06

  No, always. You guys are always fun. That's why I like to come back out here.

• 1:55:31Tom Segura?

  It's so fun to see you. And don't forget, check out costplusdrugs.com. Look at what you're spending on medication.

• 1:55:39Speaker 06

  Yeah, whatever. If you have a prescription for anything, even if you have really good insurance, there's a good chance we're cheaper than your copay or your coinsurance.

• 1:55:47Christina Pazsitzky?

  It's awesome.

• 1:55:48Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:55:48Tom Segura?

  That's awesome.

• 1:55:48Christina Pazsitzky?

  Yeah, stick it to the man, Mark.

• 1:55:49Speaker 06

  Stick it to the man.

• 1:55:50Tom Segura?

  Yeah. All right, we'll see you guys next week.

• 1:55:53Christina Pazsitzky?

  Bye, mommy.

• 1:56:13Speaker 09

  Come here and lick on your pussy. Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy. Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy.

• 1:56:25Speaker 04

  Kiss my pussy!

• 1:56:27Speaker 09

  Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy. Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy.

• 1:56:37Speaker 04

  Kiss it!

• 1:56:42Speaker 09

  Grab him by the pussy.

• 1:56:48Speaker 09

  Grab him by the pussy.

• 1:56:51Speaker 04

  Duck time!

• 1:56:53Speaker 09

  Grab him by the pussy.

• 1:56:56Speaker 04

  Duck time!

• 1:56:58Speaker 09

  Come here and lick on your pussy. Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy.

• 1:57:04Speaker 04

  Kiss my pussy!

• 1:57:06Speaker 09

  Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy.

• 1:57:10Speaker 04

  Kiss my pussy!

• 1:57:11Speaker 09

  Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy.

• 1:57:16Speaker 04

  Kiss my pussy!

• 1:57:17Speaker 09

  Diamonds in the crevice of your pussy.

• 1:57:22Speaker 04

  Kiss it!

• 1:57:27Speaker 09

  Grabbed by the pussy.

• 1:57:32Speaker 01

  Get my pussy!

• 1:57:37Speaker 09

  Couldn't even tickle your pussy.

• 1:57:44Speaker 04

  S A R T.

• 1:57:48Speaker 01

  Just glass and let's glass.

• 1:57:56Speaker 04

  Tom Zergier. Tom Zergier. Is the water champ. Is the water champ.