The Chiefs Are Done, Pittsburgh Hates Us, Lamar Is Missing, Guess the Lines, and Some NBA Stuff With Cousin Sal

The Ringer’s Bill Simmons is joined by Cousin Sal right after the Texans take down the Chiefs to discuss the Chiefs’ slim playoff chances, and to recap Week 14 of the NFL season (3:34). Then, they guess the lines for Week 15 before ending with Parent Corner (57:36). Host: Bill Simmons Guest: Cousin Sal Producers: Chia Hao Tat and Eduardo Ocampo Michelob ULTRA Courtside could get you closer to the game! michelobultra.com/courtside This episode is sponsored by State Farm®. Don’t settle for just any insurance when there’s State Farm. The Ringer is committed to responsible gaming. Please visit⁠⁠⁠ www.rg-help.com⁠⁠⁠ to learn more about the resources and helplines available. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to you by PNC Bank. In today's sports, everyone is constantly trying to outdo each other. Trick formations, infield shifts, constant rotation changes. Yet it's proven time and time again that strong fundamentals are the thing that will lead you to victory. Banking, no different. While everyone else tries to outdo each other, PNC Bank just keeps going right down the middle with steady, calculated money moves and the financial wins just keep coming. PNC Bank, brilliantly boring since 1865, brilliantly boring since 1865 is a registered mark of the PNC Financial Services Group, Incorporated. PNC Bank, National Association, Member, FDIC.

• 0:45Bill Simmons?

  The Bill Simmons Podcast is brought to you by The Ringer Podcast Network. We have a new episode of the rewatchables coming on Monday. We did a movie called Shampoo, which is a pretty famous movie that had a few Oscar nominations. Came out 50 years ago. Warren Beatty, Goldie Hawn, Julie Christie, Jack Warden. And the reason we did it was because we had a special guest. It was me and Sean Fantasy and special guest Cameron Crowe, one of my favorite directors. We still have not done Almost Famous on the rewatchables, but yet Cameron Crowe is on. But he brought an unbelievable gift. We went for over two hours. We tied it to a lot of his. If you like Cameron Crowe movies, watch Shampoo and then listen to this rewatchables because it's great. So that's my first plug.

• 1:28Bill Simmons?

  Second plug, we're launching, we're recording it tomorrow afternoon, Pacific time, and then it's going to run on Monday night. Max Kellerman, Rich Paul. The podcast is called Game Over. It's going to be Monday, Wednesday, Fridays. I am really, really excited about this one. I might even go to the taping tomorrow. They're going to talk sports, culture, all kinds of things. And I think this is going to be a really good podcast. We even got some free PR from Stephen A. That was great. Thank you for the 29 minutes. We didn't even have to like purchase it. It was awesome. One thing though, he did mention me a couple of times. As you know, I like Stephen A. But he wondered why I didn't ask him about what he said about Max when he was on my podcast. And the reason I didn't ask him was because he was on my, I looked it up.

• 2:13Bill Simmons?

  He was on my podcast in July 2023. And then all the stuff he said that I didn't really like was on Joe Button's podcast. Two months later, where I, I just thought, uh, some of the stuff he said about Max, I just didn't like it. And I would have brought it up, but it was two months after we did the podcast. So, um, I'm happy to talk about it next time, Stephen A. I'm sure we'll do a podcast at some point. We can go at it. We get along and uh, thank you for the PR. Anyway, game over. Monday, Wednesday, Friday. Uh, check it out. Listen to it on Spotify, wherever you get your, uh, your podcast. Coming up on this podcast, I can't wait. It was an unbelievable football day. It was a very dramatic Sunday night. Cousin Sal and I broke all of it down. We did it live on YouTube.

• 2:58Bill Simmons?

  And it's all coming up next after a break and after Pearl Jam. But before we do that, I have to mention that the Jeff Buckley documentary that we did for Music Box, that has been up all weekend. I really hope you had a chance to watch. We have three more coming. I'll tell you about the next one on Tuesday, but uh, break, Pearl Jam, and then Cousin Sal. This episode of the Bill Simmons Podcast is presented by State Farm. Having insurance isn't the same as having State Farm. It's like expecting a linebacker on the football field, but getting a line cook. Sure, they both can handle the pressure when it starts heating up, but only one is stopping a touchdown. You wouldn't settle for just anything for your team. So don't settle for just any insurance when it comes to getting help you need.

• 3:43Bill Simmons?

  State Farm is the real deal. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

• 4:14Bill Simmons?

  Cousins, how is here after an incredible Chiefs Texans game? Let's start here. Mike sure texted in a couple of weeks. Mahomes may do something Brady never did. Play meaningless football game.

• 4:27Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 4:28Bill Simmons?

  How about that? And I went back and I looked and it's true. Tom Brady never played a meaningless regular season game. There were stakes for every game of of his career, starting in 01. I thought this was an absolutely momentous Sunday night football game. The Chiefs are gonna be out of the playoffs. Like, I honestly can't believe this.

• 4:47Speaker 01

  When you said he's gonna do something we've never seen before, I thought you were gonna say murder each and every one of his receivers. Maybe his head coach for some decisions. It's over, Bill. The dynasty is over. We just saw it. I'm glad to spend the time with you, Mike.

• 5:03Bill Simmons?

  I thought Collinsworth was great tonight. I thought he had the right level of of drama. So did Tirico. Drama, surprise. You could feel the stakes. The Chiefs, three Super Bowl wins, two Super Bowl losses, two conference titles in the last seven years. You look at it in pro football reference and it's just like the highest pinnacle of excellence. And now they might go like eight and nine. I don't even know, but they're they've gone from this, probably one of the better seven year runs we've ever seen in the history of the league to just they're done. I mean, we put them in futures before the year. It's the automatically you put the Chiefs saying, no, they'll make the playoffs.

• 5:38Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 5:38Bill Simmons?

  Put that as seven playoff teams. They're not gonna make the playoffs. And you go through the

• 5:42Speaker 01

  They're 10th now. It's nuts.

• 5:44Bill Simmons?

  Well, you go through like they've lost to the Chargers, the Eagles, the Jaguars, the Bills, the Broncos, the Cowboys, and now the Texans. All teams that have winning records or in your case, the Cowboys are 6-6-1. But and they beat Baltimore, Detroit and Indianapolis. So they're three and seven against good teams, which leads to the question.

• 6:08Bill Simmons?

  Was this a good team? And the answer is probably not.

• 6:12Speaker 01

  No, they were a fine, average team. Oh, it's so weird this year because I feel like there are so many average teams and this was for the taken, right? But this game was different, I felt like than the rest of the ones that you just mentioned, because it did, it really did seem like the receivers, he didn't have magnificent numbers. What was he like 15 for, 14 for 33? I think Stroud had similar numbers, except he had the touchdowns and Mahomes had the three interceptions, mostly coming off of his own players' face masks and stuff. But, uh, but they quit. I thought the, the coaches like, I mean, well, let's just get to it. They were winning this game. Houston blew it the first time, 10-0. And then it was 10-10 and the Chiefs went for about 10 and a half minutes left, fourth and four from their own 20, whatever. Like the Texans weren't.

• 6:57Bill Simmons?

  We were texting about it immediately.

• 6:58Speaker 01

  They weren't looking to score again. That was it. The defense was flying for the Chiefs.

• 7:02Bill Simmons?

  The Texans were in a three and out frenzy.

• 7:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:06Bill Simmons?

  For the entire second half and did not seem like they could block the Chiefs anymore. And they didn't seem like they could unlock the play calling either. Like, I was wondering, why are you guys throwing a screen? They've got seven guys coming on every play. Why don't you just lob the ball over to Mark? So I, I didn't understand what was going on. And it just felt like the Chiefs defense was going to win the game. So you have 10 plus minutes left. It's fourth and one. They're basically on their 30. It's a tie game. It's freezing cold out. The crowd's into it. It feels like the Texans are going to turn the ball over at, at some point over in the fourth quarter. You could feel it coming. Sack, strip sack, tip ball, something bad was going to happen. And they went for it and I don't care if you have Patrick Mahomes. I just, I'm not doing that.

• 7:51Bill Simmons?

  My defense is the best unit on either team on the field and I'm home. My defense is not going to let them score for the rest of the game. I thought that was the, one of the worst decisions of the year, not just of the weekend, the year.

• 8:03Speaker 01

  And their defense is pretty good too, which is another reason you don't do it, right? On fourth and, and it really, it just changed. And I get it, everybody goes for four on fourth and one now. It doesn't really matter where you're on the field, but this just felt different just because of. The momentum and if you don't believe in that, fine, but you really felt like Houston was kind of done scoring for the night. It changed the total vibe of the game. It really was like, uh, like at a Christmas party and people were like, you know, feeling themselves are drinking, maybe smoking a little weed and in someone brings up plus one.

• 8:34Bill Simmons?

  Why are you bringing up Daniel?

• 8:35Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah, I didn't raise to bring up Daniel, but and then in comes like an FBI agent as a plus one like, oh, uh, this, this, this changes everything here. I don't know. I don't know what we're gonna do here. What bonehead, bonehead decision.

• 8:49Bill Simmons?

  We've been talking about this fourth and one, fourth and two. I mean, this has been one of the dialogues of the last 20 years dating back to Belichick going for it on fourth and two from his own 28 in that Colts game on a Sunday night, which I wrote like a 10,000 word column about what happened. The difference was they couldn't stop the Colts and he went for it because he knew if he didn't get it, or if they punted, the Colts were just gonna come down and score. And he felt like he had, this was the only way he could control the game because if they didn't, they punted it back, it was over. In this case, the Chiefs defense was controlling the game. You don't need to take a risk on offense. Your defense is, is probably has a better chance of creating something than your offense does because nobody on your, either Mahomes can't throw deep balls

• 9:30Bill Simmons?

  anymore. He had that piece. They weren't running the ball that well and their receivers were dropping balls. They, it just, they were off. It was freezing cold. I get it. Um, and Kelsey's not Kelsey anymore. That's another thing when you watch the Chiefs like he's, it happens. It happens to all the great players, but he's not Kelsey anymore. And he was involved in two of the worst plays of this game, but I just hated it. And I think when you go for it and the downside is if we go for this, this team that can no longer breathe and is in a coma offensively, we're basically resuscitating them. Yeah, we're giving them, we're, we're giving them a Red Bull. We're giving them a donut with some sugar in it. Like we're, we're lifting them up. We're giving them a massage. They're

• 10:12Bill Simmons?

  like back and they're under 30. They know they're at least getting a field goal and it changed the game and it was stupid and I'll fight it to the death. It was a dumb play.

• 10:20Speaker 01

  I don't think you have to fight anyone. I don't know. I mean, I guess, I guess you have to fight Andy Reid. That's it. Um, my Monday's on Andy.

• 10:26Bill Simmons?

  He did it again. He went for it a second time with six minutes left. They're down seven.

• 10:30Speaker 01

  The first time. So you don't have to make that dumb decision with six minutes left. That's exactly why you don't do it.

• 10:35Bill Simmons?

  Put it again. Stop him. Your defense is playing great. What are you doing?

• 10:39Speaker 01

  I hate to look at everything through the lens of gambling. It makes me feel kind of bad sometimes, but they were like minus-

• 10:45Bill Simmons?

  That's actually what we do.

• 10:46Speaker 01

  Then that's what we do. But they were minus 340 at that point, like at fourth down. The only thing that's flipping that is a turnover or-

• 10:54Bill Simmons?

  When it was fourth and one?

• 10:55Speaker 01

  When it was fourth and one, like that drive.

• 10:57Bill Simmons?

  They were minus 340?

• 10:57Speaker 01

  They were minus 340. They, it was a tie game and they were minus. They had-

• 11:01Bill Simmons?

  Wow.

• 11:02Speaker 01

  I wish like the, you talk about analytics and everything. There should be some nerd on the sideline. Hey, coach, take a look at the FanDuel page. You're minus 340. If we boot this, we're still minus 340. If we don't get it on fourth and one, we're a plus all of a sudden. Just disgusting.

• 11:16Bill Simmons?

  Honestly, it's arrogance that's well earned because they've had an incredible amount of success the last seven years. And it was a fuck you move. We're the Chiefs. We'll get this. We've been getting it for two thirds of a decade and it'll be fine. And it was stupid. It was the wrong way to play it because your defense was better than your offense in this game. So you had at the, you ended that game, Mahomes had at one point 10 straight incompletions or interceptions. This is in the fourth quarter as they're trying to save their season. It wasn't like this was a random Sunday night game. It's like, when you go through the teams they're behind, they've lost to the Chargers, the Jaguars,

• 11:57Bill Simmons?

  now the Texans. Denver's gone, that ship sails, and they've lost to the Bills. So these are all teams that I know that at the, before the game that the, the political guy was on with Marion Taylor, like doing all the odds and trying to have like the shtick with it. I don't really understand why they use him. But he did say if the Chiefs lost, they had a 12% chance to make the playoffs. To me, it's like a 0% chance. What scenario are they making the playoffs?

• 12:22Speaker 01

  No. So they have, um, I think they're plus 340 to make the playoffs. It says right now, but they have the Chargers at Tennessee, Denver, and at Las Vegas. It doesn't matter. They're a game behind Houston, who's not going to stop losing. They, they, they have Arizona and Las Vegas, Houston. So they're going to get two more wins, plus the win over them, plus the tiebreaker. They're not, they're not making it over Houston. I, I feel like the AFC said a little, we could, we could talk a little. One more thing about this, this game, disgusting, and I know you- Offered your bed aches and bad beats today. I went on the pregame show today and I said, I am betting Houston under eight and a half points in the second half. Blind betting it like a, like a Phil Hellmuth blind bet. Uh, I'm, I'm checking off the flop. That's it. That's after flop. That's it.

• 13:05Speaker 01

  And I was like Spagnola has done it and like the last four home games. They've scored a total of one touchdown and three of them. This is it. I had that. I mean, there's, I really, there's no way I should have lost that. I'm so mad and broke right now. Well, go ahead.

• 13:19Bill Simmons?

  Andy Reid lost it for you.

• 13:20Speaker 01

  He really did. Disgusting, disgusting.

• 13:23Bill Simmons?

  This was also, the stats won't show it.

• 13:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:26Bill Simmons?

  But I really liked how CJ Stroud played in this game. And this was a really good game for the. Anyone, and we've all had the thoughts like, eh, if Davis Mills was playing, is this much different? But Stroud took some big hits, um, moved around. He never, I don't think he had a turnover.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  No, I don't think so.

• 13:44Bill Simmons?

  Had a couple of big third downs to just kind of help them kind of survive a little bit. Uh, and it was really only had Collins. I, I didn't, there was a lot about this game I didn't understand because the Chiefs lost their best cornerback early on. They lost yet another tackle at the beginning of the game and it just felt like, wow, if you have the Texans or you're a Texans fan, this is, couldn't have gone better. Um, and they just, you know, it's the old Lombardi, bad offensive lines don't travel. But we've also seen the Texans in this type of game earlier in the season where they just. Really hard for them to get to like 17 points, which goes back to the Reid decision. This is a team that on the road in bad weather against a good defense is just not going to put up 20 points.

• 14:25Speaker 01

  Yeah. And I'm with you with CJ Stroud. Like he really, I don't want to say he showed me something, uh, decided I'm annoyed by that. Yeah. He really showed me something today. That's really a way of saying almost nothing.

• 14:35Bill Simmons?

  It's like a backhanded compliment.

• 14:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, right. Showed me, showed me his coin collection. It was fine. But, uh, no, you're right. He was like rolling right on third and long and we complete the, just when you thought it was like throwing out of bounds. He'd completed for a first down and Collins a lot of times is unguardable. I think he really is so. And he comes back for balls. He does everything right as a receiver. If this team had a decent running game or a, a good running bank, they'd be. A, a lot of trouble for everyone in the AFC. They might already be. Well.

• 15:04Bill Simmons?

  Decent chance to host a, host a first round game, right? They have, they just have to catch Jacksonville. Cause I think Indianapolis, we'll talk about them later, but it feels like Indianapolis is in a lot of trouble.

• 15:18Speaker 01

  I don't know if they catch them though. They're two off of Jacksonville.

• 15:21Bill Simmons?

  Jacksonville. I thought they were one off.

• 15:23Speaker 01

  What are the, what's their record now?

• 15:23Bill Simmons?

  Was Jacksonville 10 and 4 now?

• 15:25Speaker 01

  Nine and 4. Nine and 4, right?

• 15:27Bill Simmons?

  Not Jacksonville's nine and 4, so Houston's 8, 8 and 5.

• 15:31Speaker 01

  Oh, they have 8, right? Sorry. Yeah.

• 15:33Bill Simmons?

  And then play Arizona, Las Vegas, they're at the Chargers in Indianapolis.

• 15:39Speaker 01

  Just Tennessee's just such an easy win for everyone, but yeah, I hear you. That's what, how they'd have to do it.

• 15:45Bill Simmons?

  Well, Tennessee, and I don't know if you watched Mike McCoy's post-game locker room speech.

• 15:49Speaker 01

  I missed that one. What did he do? He kept his clothes on?

• 15:52Bill Simmons?

  Praise Tony Pollard. Talked about how well they ran the ball. Um, he thanked, he thanked KOC for, not KOC, Stefanski. For that weird two-point play he ran and took his hot quarterback off the field.

• 16:08Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, listen, I was on a Pats thread today and all of us were like, please God, don't, we don't want the 2-7 against the Texans.

• 16:16Speaker 01

  Right.

• 16:16Bill Simmons?

  Please no. I don't want to play them. I don't want to play their defense. I, I just think that's a scary matchup because you have, you figure the Bills. Either they're gonna catch the Pats and take over the AFC East, or they're gonna be the 5 seed would be my guess. They have probably one more loss than them, but they'll end up probably 12 and 5 would be my guess.

• 16:36Speaker 01

  Right.

• 16:38Bill Simmons?

  And then it's the Chargers, the Colts, the Texans. Puncher's chance of the Chiefs is the other wild card spot, but.

• 16:45Speaker 01

  I think the, the Chargers Texans week 17 is probably for the 6 seed. I've looked, I've looked ahead a little bit here. That's probably for the 6 seed, losers the 7 seed. But otherwise, honestly, these playoff positions are kind of set. I don't know what the numbers are, but. Chargers, Texans, Bills, probably the wild cards, right?

• 17:05Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. I think that's fair. It's, it's hard because everybody's playing each other. And then you have in the NFC South, you have Carolina and Tampa playing each other twice. So it's hard to, guess what? We'll talk about that later too. I was trying to think of. The most shocking, I can't believe this ended this fast NFL season that I can remember since we were kids. Cause even like the Cowboys, you made the playoffs that year and you even won a round and then you lost. And then the next year you went six and 10. And the Pats had that last year after they won their last Rams Super Bowl, when, you know, they, they played the Titans. They still made the, did they make the play? I can't even remember if they made the playoffs or not, but that, that terrible loss to Rayball at the end, but.

• 17:48Speaker 01

  The pick six of that, yeah.

• 17:49Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, they were at least in it and it felt okay. And the last one I could remember was the 1980 Steelers. Remember when they went nine and seven? I don't think they made it, but it was so stunning as a kid, like the.

• 18:02Speaker 01

  Right.

• 18:03Bill Simmons?

  My God, the Steelers are not gonna, they'd won four or five Super Bowls. It's like, it's really over? Like it, it was just like improbable. And then I'm sure there's kids right now like, oh my God, really?

• 18:15Speaker 01

  The Eagles, the Eagles, after they made the Super Bowl, but lost to the Chiefs, lost the last six, was that the year, the next year? But that wasn't, yeah, you're right. That wasn't like early. So.

• 18:26Bill Simmons?

  It wasn't like a either, you know, a mini dynasty like this was. That wasn't like.

• 18:30Speaker 01

  I see. Okay.

• 18:31Bill Simmons?

  A generational team that, you know, we'll remember this Chiefs run for as long as we're following football.

• 18:36Speaker 01

  Yeah. And it wasn't even a big injury. Like it really wasn't, you know, if Mahomes goes out week four, you understand, but this is just every game. Look, they, they won all the one score games last year and they just can't do it. They can't do it this year. So I guess it was bound to happen.

• 18:51Bill Simmons?

  The game when it really felt like, and maybe this will determine the playoff standings, but that stupid Jaguars Monday night game that everyone and their brother lost money on. And that pick six Mahomes through, and it just, that was the first time it was like, huh?

• 19:05Speaker 01

  Right.

• 19:06Bill Simmons?

  This doesn't feel like a Chief season in the same way, but now you think, big picture, like Reed's about to hit his seventies. They're gonna lose Kelsey. They've spent all this money on all these dudes that they've moved these contracts forward and Chris Jones is in his thirties and Mahomes could be in his thirties now. So, you know, we've seen teams reset, but it usually depends on the draft. And had putting like two, three draft, like when the Pats did their reset in the 2010s, it was because they hit in 2011 and 12 and 13, they hit a bunch of drafts in a row and were able to rebuild. So that's going to have to be what they do.

• 19:38Speaker 01

  But we've liked a bunch of rosters more than the Chiefs for a while now, right?

• 19:42Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 19:42Speaker 01

  Like a bunch of AFC rosters. Like, oh, I'd rather, I'd rather have 10 other receiving cores than the cheap core than, than the, uh, the Chiefs do in the AFC. And now it's just like, yeah, that's still true. And, um, Mahomes has lost a step and maybe Reid's lost a step and Kelsey's definitely lost a step. And that engagement is over. I don't care what anyone says.

• 20:04Bill Simmons?

  Reporting it live right now.

• 20:06Speaker 01

  That's it. Sorry. There it is.

• 20:08Bill Simmons?

  It's funny. Mahomes, I don't feel like has lost anything other than the deep stuff, which we've talked about for two years.

• 20:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:14Bill Simmons?

  Everything else, like he still moves around in the pocket. He still pulls plays out of his ass. He's still awesome as a scrambler. He's probably the only quarterback who, when he's in the open, does, isn't necessarily going to slide. Like he, I'll say here bounced off him today for a really big play that, you know, like extended a third down. But the deep balls, and he threw a pick today on one. It's, it's been an issue for two years and I don't really understand that. I don't know if it's healthy or it's like a mental thing or what's going on.

• 20:43Speaker 01

  Right. And then.

• 20:44Bill Simmons?

  These guys are open on some of these passes.

• 20:46Speaker 01

  Some of them, some of them they are, and then they just don't get it. But it was going to be a tight window against this Texans defense on a lot of them. So I, I just, yeah. I mean, if you're asked the question, who, which quarterback do you start a team with? You're not going to go four, five, six before you say Mahomes, right? So I don't want to bury him too much.

• 21:04Bill Simmons?

  No, I was, I was listening to the Ringer NBA show or NFL show the other day with Shield and Solak was on and they were talking about Drake May and the VP. And then they were talking about how many QBs potential, like how big of an asset is he basically? And it's like,

• 21:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:20Bill Simmons?

  We have this Mahomes, Allen Lamar group and it's like, has may moved into that group as an asset. He's on a rookie contract and they were like, You know, would you trade him for Lamar, the way Lamar's been playing? No. And then they mentioned Allen, who's a little bit older than me. So, but I can see the case for Allen on that. But they said Mahomes and I'm like, man, Mahomes is gonna be 31 next year. May's 23.

• 21:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:45Bill Simmons?

  As a Pats fan, I don't, it's crazy, but I don't know if I would do that. I don't know if I would give up eight years of May to get Mahomes at this point, which would have been the craziest thing to say ever a year ago.

• 21:56Speaker 01

  And especially since he fills the void of what you're talking about. Your guy throws the deep ball well. And, uh, Mahomes doesn't anymore. That's all I'm gonna say. Nice enough. Drake May. Yeah.

• 22:07Bill Simmons?

  Thanks.

• 22:08Speaker 01

  They were off.

• 22:09Bill Simmons?

  Listen, you turned his career around.

• 22:10Speaker 01

  I know.

• 22:12Bill Simmons?

  Well, huge win for the Texans. I continue to think they're really good and they have some, some excellent wins this year. And you go back to that first part of the season. So they've beaten Baltimore, San Francisco, Jacksonville, KC, Buffalo and Indy.

• 22:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 22:30Bill Simmons?

  Hard schedule this year, right? Eight and five. When you think like Stroud missed a couple of games. Nick Chubb is in and out. They have this Woody Marks out of nowhere playing for them. Neither of their rookie receivers, they've been okay, but not awesome.

• 22:44Speaker 01

  I'd say good job by us for not crossing them off. I mean, you read that schedule? If you would have read that schedule, we looked at that schedule like, how the hell are they gonna do this? They're minus 1600 to make the playoffs.

• 22:55Bill Simmons?

  I'll give you a bad job by us. Um, I texted you and Hench in, in the house. So we do some future bets during the season sometimes and the Colts, I think were plus 780 to miss the playoffs. With that schedule coming up and we batted around and we didn't do anything.

• 23:13Speaker 01

  Didn't do it.

• 23:13Bill Simmons?

  And listen, I mean, the Danny Dimes thing was terrible today, but you knew one of these teams, after like the eight, nine game mark was gonna do the swan dive. And it was like, which ones are gonna be? Colts are now eight and five. There's a crazy Indiana injury thing going on where you had the Pacers, these first three rounds of the NBA playoffs.

• 23:34Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 23:35Bill Simmons?

  With some of the greatest comebacks. You know, most entertaining games. It was like, it was like, wow, who sold their soul to win these games, basically. And then poor Halliburton goes down in game seven. Katelyn Clark gets hurt for the fever. Then you have Jones, who Garrett's calling Indiana Jones, and seems like he's, you know, on pace to be the Kurt Warner of 25 years later. And he's playing with a fractured fibula and then blows out the Achilles on his other knee. And I think they're done. I don't, I don't think they can come back from this.

• 24:06Speaker 01

  Oh, are you calling Fernando Mendoza, the IU quarterback is going down, the second round of the playoffs?

• 24:12Bill Simmons?

  I didn't even think about him. Maybe, maybe it's just pros.

• 24:14Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 24:15Bill Simmons?

  I think he should be careful, though. I would wear like what my mom wears. I would wear the evil eye to force up.

• 24:20Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 24:23Bill Simmons?

  Do off the evil.

• 24:24Speaker 01

  Oh, I was gonna say, high heels and, uh, all right. No, yeah, no, you're right.

• 24:28Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, no, just.

• 24:28Speaker 01

  No, I.

• 24:29Bill Simmons?

  Evil eye necklace. Does your mom wear one of those?

• 24:31Speaker 01

  No, my father, my father's mother would wear that. Yeah, for sure. For sure. But.

• 24:35Bill Simmons?

  Was your mom insane, or is that just my mom?

• 24:38Speaker 01

  No, my mom's insane. But, uh, yeah, but she has different things going on. Um, yeah, you got, I mean, I feel bad for Daniel Jones. It was like a, it was a valiant effort. I mean, I don't know if it was 30 for 30 material. I mean, maybe he could be featured in a music box doc. Does he, I don't know if he plays an instrument, but he really just, we all thought the Jags were the ones that were gonna fall off, right? When you said that, like, all right, one of these three AFC South teams, it's gotta be the Jags. And now they've won four in a row. I do think, though, could they pick up Joe Flacco, this Colts team? Because they're kind of done with this Riley Leonard guy. And Anthony Richardson's not, not, he's not up to speed.

• 25:15Bill Simmons?

  Isn't he on the Bengals?

• 25:15Speaker 01

  I thought they, I thought they could, they either said goodbye to him, or they're about to say goodbye to him, I thought I saw. But, um, you know, Burrow's healthy, so they're plus 270 to make the playoffs. I don't know. I just, uh.

• 25:29Bill Simmons?

  Well, I mean, you would think they've got Anthony Richardson, but he hurt his eye in that freak injury before a game, got hit by a pass, so he's out. And, uh.

• 25:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, they're kind of down there.

• 25:40Bill Simmons?

  I don't know when Sauce Gardner comes back, so.

• 25:43Speaker 01

  Wow, really just really fell apart for them.

• 25:46Bill Simmons?

  I thought this was a weird stat. The Colts have lost 11 straight road games to Jacksonville dating back to 2015.

• 25:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, we talked about that in the pregame show. Andrew Locke was the last one. I know.

• 25:58Bill Simmons?

  Cause they had Urban Meyer that year. I didn't remember them winning any games. So somehow the Colts still lost that year?

• 26:04Speaker 01

  That was it.

• 26:05Bill Simmons?

  I have, I don't know if you saw this on FanDuel. The Jaguars are now minus 450 to host the Shaky's game on Saturday.

• 26:12Speaker 01

  Oh, is that what it is?

• 26:12Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, there's a heavy amount of action. So when dimes went down.

• 26:17Speaker 01

  If there's, I mean, if it's Jaguars, they could host, could host Houston, right? Couldn't that be a 2-6?

• 26:25Bill Simmons?

  My guess it's, it's Jaguars against either the Bills or the Patriots. Cause if the Bills beat the Patriots next week, they still have a chance to win the AFCs. But I would say the five seed is coming from the AFC East would be my guess.

• 26:39Speaker 01

  See, I think the Jags could be a two seed. Like who, they're gonna end up with, they have the Jets at Denver, at Indy and Tennessee. They're gonna have 11 or 12 wins. Your team will be the one seed. Who, right? Like they play Denver. So if they win that, they're, I think the two seed.

• 26:55Bill Simmons?

  Wow, are you right here?

• 26:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:58Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah. Cause they're ahead of, oh, you're right. Cause they, yeah, they're gonna be ahead of the AFC North.

• 27:03Speaker 01

  Denver's got some tough games left.

• 27:05Bill Simmons?

  So it'll be the three seed. So it'll be a 3-6. So it'll be like, I mean, Jacksonville Chargers, just put it in the Shaky's now. Put the, start making the posters.

• 27:15Speaker 01

  That's a lifetime achievement.

• 27:16Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that's, there's no question.

• 27:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:19Bill Simmons?

  There's no NFC matchup that's gonna battle that one. Yeah, you're right. I forgot that the AFC North's gonna be the four seed. So that'll be either Pittsburgh or Baltimore hosting Buffalo or New England.

• 27:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:30Bill Simmons?

  Odds are it'll be Pittsburgh hosting Buffalo, a game that I feel like we've seen every year now for nine years. It's probably only happened twice.

• 27:37Speaker 01

  We saw, yeah, I know. We can't get away from that one. What did that turn into? A real disgusting division. I don't know when you want to talk about that, but.

• 27:44Bill Simmons?

  Well, so Lauren, tell me if you agree with this. Trevor Lawrence after the game today. We all feel like we're a really good team and probably don't get the credit we deserve. And everybody talks about every other team. It's not untrue. Nobody really cares about the Jags, which is fine. It's kind of just how it is and we'll use it as a chip on our shoulder and keep playing. You know what happened when I read that, Sal?

• 28:06Speaker 01

  What'd you do?

• 28:07Bill Simmons?

  That nobody believes in us, police got activated. Yeah. They all hopped in a car and started cruising the neighborhood. They were like, whoa, Trevor Lawrence is just throwing it out there. Could the Jags be a nobody believes in us team? Nine and four, nobody's talking about us. I'm just, we're in nobody, it's in December, we're in nobody believes in us land. Just, I'm on radar now.

• 28:27Speaker 01

  He said, nobody cares about us. Is that the same as nobody believes in us? Cause I, I agree that nobody cares about them.

• 28:32Bill Simmons?

  Nobody really cares about the Jags, which is fine. We don't get the credit we deserve. Everybody talks about every other team. That all quality, that's all nobody believes in us talk.

• 28:41Speaker 01

  Okay. All right.

• 28:42Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 28:42Speaker 01

  Yeah. I'm, uh, I'm starting to believe.

• 28:45Bill Simmons?

  I'm gonna count myself. I don't believe in you either, even though I, I bet on you today, the Jaguars.

• 28:49Speaker 01

  I bet on them in August. They're my team to win the AFC South and with, with each win, I become less confident in them.

• 28:57Speaker 01

  But they do get off to leads now. They kind of feel like they stomp out some of these teams and their defense is very good. Like they won their last four, three of them, they allowed a total of one touchdown. Three of the, three of the four wins there. So I, I still think they're gonna have 12 wins. I don't think, uh, I'm not saying, uh, I'm betting them to win the Super Bowl or whatever. What odds would they be? Like that, I don't care.

• 29:17Bill Simmons?

  I'm not gonna let you do that.

• 29:19Speaker 01

  No, they're 19 and one. Keep, keep going on that, cause.

• 29:22Bill Simmons?

  One thing that happened today was, uh, I thought Thomas was, you felt his presence a little bit in that game today. Which he's been, I don't know, for the last six, seven weeks, he's been either not playing because he was, was hurt or he was a mess. And he was, yeah, on fantasy waiver wires, like it was that bad. But if they can get him going a little bit with the running game they have and some of the other stuff. And then I had a couple of red zone plays today where there was one specifically where Lawrence was about to get sacked. He's running down the middle toward the end zone. There's a guy behind him going for and it just like had all the makings of the strip sack, but he didn't fumble it.

• 30:00Speaker 01

  Right.

• 30:01Bill Simmons?

  And I was like, oh, Trevor Lawrence.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:03Bill Simmons?

  Get better at this stuff.

• 30:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's weird. He's beating, uh, well, you know, like I said, that's a big game against Denver. And then like if it, I'll believe in you there, Trevor Lawrence. You beat Denver. Not that they're a world beater, as we saw today, but you do that and all of a sudden you're a decent, decent division winner.

• 30:21Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to you by Michelob Ultra. The NBA Cup is back. It's sure to be thrilling as always. I think the one thing I was like with the NBA Cup, what team is going to come out of nowhere and kind of plant their flag and make us believe in them going forward? Because a big spotlight, national TV, good crowds, who's going to kind of step up in the playoff atmosphere? The best moments are served cold, just like Michelob Ultra or refreshing beer with only 95 calories. Plus Ultra is also helping you see all the excitement up close and in person with the chance to win courtside tickets. Michelob Ultra, superior is worth playing for. Enter now at michelobultra.com/courtside. Michelob Ultra Courtside 25 to 26.

• 31:02Bill Simmons?

  No purchase necessary. Open to US residents. 21 plus begins on October 1st, 2025, ends on June 30th, 2026. Multiple entry periods. See official rules at michelobultra.com/courtside for free entry, entry deadlines, prizes and details. So the biggest things that happened today. Chief season's seemingly over. I'm going to go with this one next. Do you want me to list all the things I thought were the biggest things to happen today? Or do you want me to go one at a time?

• 31:29Speaker 01

  Sure, go ahead.

• 31:30Bill Simmons?

  Want me to go for drama, just one at a time?

• 31:31Speaker 01

  We can only really respond to one at a time, right? So I don't, whatever you want to.

• 31:35Bill Simmons?

  That's a great point.

• 31:38Bill Simmons?

  LaMars?

• 31:45Speaker 01

  You all right? We're live, you know?

• 31:50Bill Simmons?

  What's going on here?

• 31:52Speaker 01

  I know.

• 31:53Bill Simmons?

  Has he been replaced?

• 31:56Bill Simmons?

  Is this alien Lamar? Who is this? Is he way more hurt than, is this like when Derrick Rose came back after his ACL injury? And it was like, that looks like Derrick Rose, but it's, it's not Derrick Rose. Who is that? I don't understand this. He's not scary anymore. He, when he takes off, you don't, he's not, you don't feel like he's this incredible magician. He just seems like the worst case version of playoff game Lamar, but it's every week now.

• 32:27Speaker 01

  Right. He has what? No touchdown passes in how many weeks? I know, I know. He was like averaging seven fantasy points the last three weeks before today. I don't know what this team's identity is, and I'll throw the Steelers in there too, because I have no idea what they're gonna do week to week.

• 32:43Bill Simmons?

  I can't handle them.

• 32:44Speaker 01

  But the Ravens like outran them by what? 180 yards today? That's usually a winning formula.

• 32:50Bill Simmons?

  10 yards or something, Russia.

• 32:53Speaker 01

  At home, that's usually good enough. And they got screwed on that touchdown day, like I'll, whatever. They played poorly, but that likely touchdown, I, I don't understand what, what anyone's looking at there. Like you have to, what do you have to do? You have to secure the ball. You have to take two steps, then take 11 more steps, then high, high step across and then celebrate with a cheerleader.

• 33:12Bill Simmons?

  Finish the catch by actually finishing the catch and then finishing it again. But you can toe tap. Why is he always involved in these?

• 33:18Speaker 01

  I know. You're right. He is. It's, everything's down by the goal line with him. Maybe, maybe take him out there.

• 33:23Bill Simmons?

  And also, we were watching it today and they were showing the replays. It's like, why did you drop this? It was like the guy came in late and hit it. He just caught it, took two steps and just was like, ah.

• 33:34Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah. He freaked out. Yeah. I don't know. But I mean, they should be over, able to overcome that and Aaron Rodgers. I'll tell you what, I'm looking at something. They, they could be done. They're six and seven. Could they be six and 11? At Cincy, your team, at Green Bay, at Pittsburgh. I mean, they're still showing a 165 for the division. They could be 6 and 11. You get 8 to 1 odds on 6 and 11 for them. It might be all over.

• 34:02Bill Simmons?

  I think they're done. And I kind of felt like they were done even before this week, but the Steelers were so bad the last couple of weeks. I looked it up. So the Steelers are 7 and 6, which is 13 games.

• 34:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 34:14Bill Simmons?

  But I added, I've lost money on 15 Steelers games this year. There's only 13. There's two extra games. I don't, I couldn't find them in the standings. Every week I'm wrong with them. It's just week after week, get it wrong. They're the ultimate Costanza zigzag team.

• 34:28Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 34:29Bill Simmons?

  And the thing that was weird today was Rodgers was good. He, I, I thought he, like, he, the last couple of weeks, he was awful. Like, he couldn't have been worse. And today I was like, he's made some plays. He created time. He, I don't know, he took some hits. He, he did the double down check, check down, whatever the fuck that's called.

• 34:51Speaker 01

  Right, yeah.

• 34:52Bill Simmons?

  But did you agree? Like, he was pretty good.

• 34:54Speaker 01

  Yes. He extended drives. He did all the things you're supposed to do as a quarterback. You know, maybe playing with that wrist messed up, that left wrist. Last week was tougher than this week. You wouldn't think so, but going to Baltimore would be a tall task. But yeah, they're the class of that division. We just keep hoping that Cincinnati could win so that they could compete for the division. But it's just, it's over. It's over. Like, it's, it's these two crummy teams that are gonna lead the way.

• 35:21Bill Simmons?

  At 110 Pacific time today, Malley Rubin texted, "I'd rather get a rectal exam every Sunday than watch the Ravens," which is a Ravens fan.

• 35:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:31Bill Simmons?

  That's pretty rough. I don't know. Put that on the, put that on the box, the VHS for the season. They still make those 2025 Ravens season thing. I, the Steelers had 13 first downs and 34 yards rushing and they won. And I, I don't know, how, how many of these games have they won like that? Where you're like, how did they win? What just happened? What did I watch?

• 35:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:52Bill Simmons?

  If likely catches it, I don't think the Steelers can go 50 yards to get the field goal, do you?

• 35:59Speaker 01

  Probably not. No, not the way that game was going. But I, I feel like both these teams deserve 6 and 7, 7 and 6 at this point.

• 36:07Bill Simmons?

  So what are Ravens to make the playoffs?

• 36:09Speaker 01

  They are, well, their division in playoffs is essentially the same, plus 168. Cause they're not getting a wild card.

• 36:17Bill Simmons?

  I was thinking in quarterbacks and Lamar is better than the guys that I'm about to mention are, but quarterbacks that just weren't as good anymore. And it was, and we kept waiting for it to come back and it just didn't. But uh, Culpepper did this.

• 36:33Speaker 01

  Right.

• 36:34Bill Simmons?

  Randall Cunningham did this. Michael Vick did this when he came back after the suspension and he was really good. And then all of a sudden he wasn't. Um, I'm sure there's others, but it, it wouldn't be like crazy unusual if he just kind of peaked two years ago. And that's where we are with this now. Or he might just have four injuries and they're not being honest with us about any of them.

• 36:56Speaker 01

  Right. You know, I was looking at his numbers against the Chiefs, against the Steelers, uh, in January. They're all bad, right? Lamar's record. And it's like, we had our top four in our heads for probably about three or four years now. It's been Lamar, it's been Allen, it's been Mahomes, it's been Burrow. I didn't expect to, I'm not kicking two of them out of there, but we're talking about it, right? Like we're, we're discussing.

• 37:20Bill Simmons?

  Lamar has to, Lamar is out of there now. I mean, whether he can play himself fit next year, but there's no scenario where he's in there anymore.

• 37:26Speaker 01

  Right. Your boy took over there. Yeah.

• 37:28Bill Simmons?

  Is there anybody else? Jordan Love's kind of like doing this now.

• 37:33Speaker 01

  Right.

• 37:35Bill Simmons?

  Hey guys.

• 37:37Bill Simmons?

  Let me in. Like I thought love was great today.

• 37:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, he was excellent. I don't know why he does a fadeaway pass when he doesn't seem to need to do that.

• 37:46Bill Simmons?

  It's almost like a basketball thing.

• 37:48Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah. But he was, he was very, very good.

• 37:51Bill Simmons?

  Let's talk about that game. Bears Packers, uh, only three games again. And I,

• 38:00Bill Simmons?

  why are they doing this to us?

• 38:02Speaker 01

  Oh, three games in the, uh, the late window.

• 38:05Bill Simmons?

  Three late games and one of the over under of one and a half of the three games sucking is usually the over.

• 38:12Speaker 01

  Right.

• 38:13Bill Simmons?

  So today too, the game sucked. Uh, which was great for me because I got to be an NBA hole and watch the Boston Celtics.

• 38:19Speaker 01

  Look at you.

• 38:20Bill Simmons?

  Beat the Toronto Raptors, the three seed in the East. I, I, one of the most inexplicable runs in the history of the franchise. Anyway.

• 38:28Speaker 01

  Well, it was like Tuesday. You were like, they're gonna get pounded by the Knicks. I was like, yes, you're right. Let's bet the Knicks. And then, uh, no, it was the other way.

• 38:35Bill Simmons?

  That you just had a. It was the other way.

• 38:37Speaker 01

  That's all you had to do.

• 38:37Bill Simmons?

  OG and Anoby didn't play though. That was great. Um, I thought Bears Packers.

• 38:44Bill Simmons?

  I thought it felt like a playoff game.

• 38:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:47Bill Simmons?

  The Bears lost and they didn't cover by a half point. But I thought that game was a good game for them. It was a moral victory. They belonged in the game. It came down to a couple of plays. They were right there and in the playoffs, I think that team could hang around and do some stuff.

• 39:06Speaker 01

  And you know, even beyond that, I'm proud of them because you know, this is a rivalry that's been going on for like 300, 350 years. Even though no one can name like two games that they remember in the last like quarter century. Yes, but they stepped up. They heard it was a rivalry that, you know, I know they were like one and 12 against Green Bay, the last 13. They were down, what 14, three at one point? And that could have been like, all right, everyone's calling them fraudulent. Now they're going to go away. They fought back. I think they only had like 73 yards in the first half of offense. They couldn't be stopped in the second half. I can't believe they didn't win this game. And I know you hate that play where he rolled left their last play where he threw an interception, Caleb. But you know what? He really showed me something. No, he was, he was very good.

• 39:50Speaker 01

  He was, he was very good today. I, I'm, I'm on Caleb Williams side and they lost and they're not going to the division.

• 39:57Bill Simmons?

  They, I thought they really fucked the game up near the end. So they're, they're, they're basically slow playing it and they were clearly going to try to score and go for the two point.

• 40:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:08Bill Simmons?

  And not have the Packers get the ball back. I couldn't believe the announcers were even wondering if they were going to go for the two point. Like they were a hundred percent going for the two point.

• 40:16Speaker 01

  You know why they were going for the two? Cause Green Bay let the clock go down. If there's a minute 40 left, if they're calling their timeouts, the Packers, now Green Bay, now the Bears have to think about going for two. Right? Cause now, you know, but go ahead.

• 40:27Bill Simmons?

  But they went too slow though. I, I, and I was saying this as it was happening because I think they ran for it. There's like a minute 15 left. And it was headed to be, it was like third down and short. And they let 38 seconds run off before they ran their next play, but the guy got stuffed. So now you have all your timeouts left. But now it's fourth down, but now even if I get it, I'm not even inside the 10 yard line. So now I've lost some of my run pass flexibility because it's under 30 seconds. I just thought it was mismanaged by, uh, by the Bears. Don't get that cute. Like run, but play with a little urgency. There's two minutes left in the game and you're down seven. Like you're, don't fuck around.

• 41:08Speaker 01

  Well, there's a report, Ben Johnson wasn't even on the field. He was in the locker room. He had started his, uh, great job guy speech.

• 41:14Bill Simmons?

  Oh, he was oiling up.

• 41:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, he was already gone. He took his shirt off. So they were coachless, um, towards the end and it frankly.

• 41:22Bill Simmons?

  He was playing his entrance music. He was getting ready.

• 41:25Speaker 01

  I guess rolling left and throwing the pass that was intercepted. They had done that against the Eagles last week and scored on it. So they do like it. Um, but I, I'm with you. This was a good Bears loss. I know they dropped to the seven seed. I don't think they're in danger of losing that playoff spot. Do you? I'm trying to look at their numbers here.

• 41:44Bill Simmons?

  No, the Bears are good.

• 41:46Speaker 01

  They're minus 215.

• 41:47Bill Simmons?

  It took me a while to kind of admit that, but I also thought they made some jumps, but they can run the ball. They had some good drives today where it felt like the game was going to get away from them and it just didn't. Caleb, he does a lot of good stuff. He does a lot of stuff that make you go, ugh. He's, you know, he's raw. He's all over the map, but he's got so much talent. There's, he'll make a couple of plays a game that are some of the best plays of the entire day. You know, these really, really crazy athletic plays are hitting guys with precision. Um, I certainly feel better about him than I did like three months ago. Don't you?

• 42:23Speaker 01

  Definitely.

• 42:23Bill Simmons?

  I, I didn't even, wasn't even positive if you could win a playoff game with him three months ago, but there's, there's enough there, I think.

• 42:30Speaker 01

  I mean, I'm, uh, this is gonna sound stupid. I'm more impressed with this game than I was him beating Philly on Black Friday.

• 42:35Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, cause the Packers are legit good. I mean, the, the X factor of this game, I have to mention this cause all the Packer fans, including a couple of my life, um, were going nuts about it. And we saw too, Parsons got held the entire game and especially in the fourth quarter, he was just getting mauled. And I don't know whether they just decided to call the whole game like that, but it was pretty crazy. And you could just see it on the TV. Like he, he was, uh, like a cannon coming out on these.

• 43:01Speaker 01

  Right. They were so fast today. Yep.

• 43:05Bill Simmons?

  I thought this was interesting. So Christian Watson's back.

• 43:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:08Bill Simmons?

  And he's ready to swing your fantasy league playoffs. I don't know if you saw this, that catch and run score. He reached 21.6 miles an hour.

• 43:17Speaker 01

  Is that right?

• 43:18Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. When I was watching live, I thought it was like 21.2.

• 43:22Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 43:23Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, it's 21.6.

• 43:25Speaker 01

  I'm gonna get you a new calibrator for Christmas, a new MPH calibrator, because yeah, you seem to be off on some of these.

• 43:33Bill Simmons?

  That's almost 22 miles an hour, so.

• 43:35Speaker 01

  I think Brady said that Caleb Williams this year had three runs over 20 miles an hour.

• 43:42Speaker 01

  Imagine Madden talking about this nonsense.

• 43:44Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, Madden would like, get this shit out of there. Brady's, it was really cold there. Brady was wearing some sort of leather.

• 43:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, what was that?

• 43:53Bill Simmons?

  Jacket vest. It looked like a combo Alaska parka, but also with a leather part. And it was so cold, I think he just decided to smile like a crazy person because I think his face froze. He was just like, ah, it's great to be here. Ah, what a game. Oh.

• 44:10Speaker 01

  He is growing on me. I'll say that. I don't know if he's one of the greats. But yeah, he's, he's grown on me. It's, it was enjoyable watching him. He's having fun watching too. So.

• 44:21Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 44:21Speaker 01

  Or maybe he's freezing.

• 44:22Bill Simmons?

  I think he's figured out how to let the game breathe and how to pop in a couple of times with like, oh, this was one of my favorite plays. Here's what they did. They, like, he, he's able to weave like some of his own things that happened into the game now in an organic way, not in an inorganic way. But Packers.

• 44:42Bill Simmons?

  I feel like we change our mind every week on this, but they seem like they're the most complete team. And especially if they can at least figure out a two seed situation and get the first two games in Lambeau. I think they're in pretty good shape.

• 44:56Speaker 01

  Nine, three and one. What are the Rams? 10 and 3?

• 45:00Bill Simmons?

  With the Seahawks game left.

• 45:02Speaker 01

  With the Seahawks, right. And Green Bay's at Denver, at Chicago, Baltimore at Minnesota. That should be three wins.

• 45:08Bill Simmons?

  That feels like three and one at least, right?

• 45:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, that should be, yeah.

• 45:12Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, so that probably two seed for them, which puts them against the seven seed, who's gonna be who?

• 45:18Speaker 01

  Uh, maybe an NFC West team?

• 45:21Bill Simmons?

  Could be the Bears, it could be, um.

• 45:23Speaker 01

  Well, the Bears, yeah. Yeah, the seven, the Bears dropped to seven right now. Yeah.

• 45:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 45:27Speaker 01

  Oh, that's true. I mean, yeah, there's still a fight for this, uh, seven seed in the NFC. I don't think it is.

• 45:32Bill Simmons?

  If Carolina wins the NFC South, is that just an automatic? Automatic Shaky's game or no?

• 45:37Speaker 01

  Uh, you can't even get it out of your, look at you, you're choking on it. Yeah, it's a.

• 45:41Bill Simmons?

  I just had a hiccup, I almost died.

• 45:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 45:44Bill Simmons?

  Still hiccuping donuts from last night at 2:30 in the morning.

• 45:47Speaker 01

  Carolina, Seattle would be a, uh, Shaky's game, you think, something like that?

• 45:51Bill Simmons?

  Oh, my God, yeah.

• 45:52Speaker 01

  Really?

• 45:53Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah.

• 45:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 45:55Bill Simmons?

  Oh, Jacksonville can't fight that.

• 45:58Speaker 01

  Uh, we are gonna lose so much money on that. It's all gonna be about Mike McDonald, how he never loses on the road. We're gonna hate Carolina by then and they're gonna win by like 27-6 or something.

• 46:08Bill Simmons?

  It'll all depend on which week it is when they do the Carolina zigzag.

• 46:11Speaker 01

  Right, that's true.

• 46:13Bill Simmons?

  It's, if it's coming off them sucking, you can't.

• 46:16Speaker 01

  I can't believe how Tampa blew this division. I honestly can't. I mean, I know you, I, I bet them and now the, these teams are both seven and six. I mean, and I lost just a ton on that Bucks parlay. Do you stay away from a Bucks money line parlay?

• 46:30Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I think they've been terrible. I looked it up. They've won one game since game three of the World Series, the 18 inning game. That felt like, that game happened like a year ago.

• 46:39Speaker 01

  Right, yeah, it was a long time ago, but they were playing good teams. Like this is, this is an automatic, just check this off.

• 46:46Bill Simmons?

  Well, remember we were talking MVP for Baker early?

• 46:50Speaker 01

  Right.

• 46:52Bill Simmons?

  He's been bad.

• 46:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 46:54Bill Simmons?

  He misses a lot of throws and does a lot of dumb shit and looks like the Baker who was in Carolina. I think he's hurt, so I'm not going to blame him. I think he's been playing hurt for the last five, six weeks, but the decision making is bad. His arm strength isn't, doesn't seem the same. He's missing dudes. I think he's just been bad.

• 47:12Speaker 01

  It was rainy and he's not 100%, but it's also rainy for Tyler Shuck. Go Shuck yourself.

• 47:18Bill Simmons?

  Pretty good.

• 47:19Speaker 01

  And he was decent and he figured it out and he ran for first downs when he needed to. I really feel like Baker let me down. Like Ruiz, early in the year, when we loved Baker, had Baker as the 16th best quarterback and he came on with me and Tate. I said, don't ever come on the show again. That's just nuts.

• 47:35Bill Simmons?

  Get out of here, Ruiz.

• 47:36Speaker 01

  That's it, Ruiz. Do your own thing. But from week seven forward, which is probably what you're talking about with the baseball world series, he's 36th of 37 in both EPA and CPOE, which I think is.

• 47:48Bill Simmons?

  It feels that way watching it.

• 47:49Speaker 01

  Yeah. Oh, man, they are going to blow this division. And they're clueless on fourth and one, like bowls, like they don't have an answer. They just can't convert fourth and one.

• 48:00Bill Simmons?

  Seahawks Falcons, speaking of the NFC South, Atlanta is now 4-9. Raheem has dropped to 33 and 56 for the career. But I wanted to mention Seattle quickly because they took care of business. They beat the hell out of Kirk Cousins.

• 48:18Bill Simmons?

  Seattle has Indianapolis home next week.

• 48:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 48:23Bill Simmons?

  We've, I guess with Riley Leonard, but if you're ever going to want to play Indianapolis, it's next week. And then the week after the Rams at home. So it's all lined up for them. Like they could potentially even be a one seed if they really wanted to go for it here. They last two games are on the road, but um.

• 48:41Speaker 01

  Their defense is spectacular. I think nine total points, eight turnovers. Like you're right. I know it's Brosmer and Cousins the last couple of weeks, but they don't really let down on the road.

• 48:54Speaker 01

  When JSN is back, like I think he's going to be the career leader in walking yards into the end zone. Like he's so far open. He starts his trot at the six yard line and just walks in.

• 49:05Bill Simmons?

  So who is the actual leader of that? I would say either Moss or Rice.

• 49:09Speaker 01

  Moss or Rice?

• 49:10Bill Simmons?

  It's like Moss had a lot of those.

• 49:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. Andre Risen used to have a bunch.

• 49:14Bill Simmons?

  Moss would have those TDs where nobody else was in the TV. He had to have led the league in that.

• 49:18Speaker 01

  Right, right, right. Yeah, yeah. All right, he's got a ways to go, but he's pretty good.

• 49:22Bill Simmons?

  Broncos, Raiders.

• 49:25Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 49:26Bill Simmons?

  Broncos did whatever, but just an incredible cover at the end of that game.

• 49:29Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 49:30Bill Simmons?

  Raiders down 10, five seconds left, lineup for the field goal. Get it, they cover. And it might have been the backdoor of the year.

• 49:37Speaker 01

  Well, I mean, you have to paint it a little like Kenny Pickett to lock it. Brandon Jones for Denver knocks it out of Lockett's hands. So they stop the clock for delay of game. Out comes Daniel Carson to kick a spread covering walk off field goal. I mean, God bless, I had the plus seven and a half. I feel like everybody else at Denver. God bless Pete Carroll, just extend him for 15 years. Let him coach into the 90s. I love that.

• 50:02Bill Simmons?

  And Pete Carroll was full Biden face the entire game now. He's just, he's got the Biden, ah, where am I?

• 50:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, Hunter Biden, yeah. Or the worst.

• 50:11Bill Simmons?

  Rams, Cardinals. I just wrote down, why do we ever pick the Raiders or the Cardinals to make the playoffs? I picked the Raiders to make the playoffs. You picked the Cardinals. Maybe when we do the futures, they should just be off limits for a playoff pick. You just can't pick them.

• 50:26Speaker 01

  You talk about that.

• 50:27Bill Simmons?

  No matter how tasty it looks.

• 50:27Speaker 01

  Four o'clock window, they are just destined to lose by 30 in that four o'clock window. Like most weeks, you know? And that was dumb.

• 50:34Bill Simmons?

  They should start flexing games to four o'clock just to kind of help out the multi-view.

• 50:38Speaker 01

  Oh, interesting. Yeah, well, we got, we have a full slate weeks coming up. There are no more buys, so we get like four or five, uh, 4pm games. But this should have been the only bet we made. The Rams raging after that loss. Cardinals dying to lose by multiple touchdowns. What, what did we do there?

• 50:54Bill Simmons?

  Gannon in the first coach fired, kind of, kind of, there's a little smoke down. Dolphins, Jets. So Dolphins are six and seven, which is the same record as the Chiefs. So I was trying to think when they lost that game in Cleveland. The Dolphins. And if I said to you then, I will bet you in week 14, the Dolphins and Chiefs will both be six and seven. What was that, 25 to one?

• 51:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, something like that.

• 51:20Bill Simmons?

  And here's the funny thing. Like they basically eliminated Tua from the offense.

• 51:25Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 51:26Bill Simmons?

  He had week 10, 173 yards. Week 11, 171. Week 13, 157. Today he was 127. Throwing three touchdowns in four weeks. When you watch it, it's like you kind of forget he's on the team half the time.

• 51:40Speaker 01

  Right.

• 51:41Bill Simmons?

  They're just trying to run the ball. Achan gets hurt today.

• 51:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:44Bill Simmons?

  They bring him right. They're just pound, pound, pound. I think this probably is the last game they're gonna win this year, which.

• 51:50Speaker 01

  It better be.

• 51:51Bill Simmons?

  You know, over under was seven and a half.

• 51:54Speaker 01

  I mean, I don't care about that. We have a nice little tidy parlay for them, for teams to not make the playoffs. And they are, uh, they're still in the hunt. They're still in that fricking graphic. They had 239 yards rushing. They beat Brady Cook today, but they need to go. What we may want to hedge there with 55 to one.

• 52:11Bill Simmons?

  I'm not hedging the Dolphins. They can fuck off.

• 52:15Bill Simmons?

  Titans, Cleveland.

• 52:16Speaker 01

  Did we cross them off? I can't remember if we did.

• 52:17Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, they're still crossed off.

• 52:18Speaker 01

  Okay, yeah.

• 52:19Bill Simmons?

  Titans, Cleveland. Shador is having kind of the perfect season where there's enough hope that it's exciting, but they're also losing every game. It's like you can't ask for much more. Stefanski, is this one of the great tank jobs of all time or is he just awful coaching? Cause now it's gotta be one or the other.

• 52:39Speaker 01

  Uh, how about this? It's just like the Browns have since been so incompetent for so long. I can't even tell what a tank is or what like, why? I mean, that two-point conversion is ridiculous for Sanders to not be on the field, but

• 52:51Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 52:52Speaker 01

  They don't even know what the play is.

• 52:53Bill Simmons?

  Well, he was on the field for the last one. We didn't get it.

• 52:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, right.

• 52:56Bill Simmons?

  He's your quarterback, fuckface. He was 360 yards.

• 53:00Speaker 01

  I do feel like Shador's status increased by him, by losing to the Titans somehow. Like it's like the.

• 53:05Bill Simmons?

  Well, this is like, I mean, it's a great talk radio topic tomorrow. This is, he's doing just well enough that everybody can, and be Stefanski sabotaging him. And we can do that whole thing. I, we never waited. I think we do this every year on the, when the team's down 14 and they score. And then the nerds have decided it's really smart to go for two.

• 53:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:25Bill Simmons?

  And I don't know how I feel about that one way or the other, but the one that was really stupid to me was the one, what was it? Thanksgiving? Or Black Friday, one of those games when the

• 53:35Speaker 01

  You didn't like that one, right?

• 53:37Bill Simmons?

  When the team, was it the Eagles? The Eagles on Friday. When, uh, and everyone argued about that for three days. I thought that was the dumbest argument I've ever seen.

• 53:46Speaker 01

  So you were saying, don't, you say kick the extra point there. I think that was to go for two to see if you're gonna be down by eight or nine, right?

• 53:54Bill Simmons?

  No, it's to go for two to try to see if you can get it to seven.

• 53:59Speaker 01

  Right. Because at some point you're gonna have to get it to seven.

• 54:01Bill Simmons?

  At some point you have to go for the two.

• 54:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:03Bill Simmons?

  My thing is, why do I have to go for two now? If I get a stop and I score another touchdown and their defense has been on the field for the whole fourth quarter? And I have even more momentum. Don't I have a better chance at that point? To get the two versus like right now? Cause if I don't get it, the game's over. And then, and then the way that people explain is like, well, then you know exactly how many points you need. It's like, it doesn't matter. I lost the game.

• 54:28Speaker 01

  Right.

• 54:29Bill Simmons?

  I wanna keep the game alive for as long as I can. I don't, this is one of those ones where I don't see the other side of the argument. You can throw all the math you want. I would rather, try to get TD, extra point, stop, get that defense right back on the field, ram it down their throats again, and then go for the two point after they've just given up 200 yards in 20 plays, you know? Go for it then.

• 54:50Speaker 01

  I was always in that camp. The defense is gonna be more tired then than it is.

• 54:54Bill Simmons?

  Right.

• 54:55Speaker 01

  Six game minutes from then.

• 54:55Bill Simmons?

  Falcons Patriots Super Bowl corollary. The more the Falcons were on the field, they just died. And then it was easier to do everything.

• 55:02Speaker 01

  But you know what's happening? I think now, not even just nerds, but people I respect more and more are now saying, no, no, you gotta go for two. You know, like when you see a movie and you're like, God, that wasn't that good. But then like people are like, you're like, no, no, no, go watch it again. Like I, now I feel, I, I can't even explain.

• 55:17Bill Simmons?

  Fantasy with Eddington.

• 55:18Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 55:19Bill Simmons?

  Fantasy's like, Eddington was great.

• 55:21Speaker 01

  That's it.

• 55:21Bill Simmons?

  Was it?

• 55:22Speaker 01

  Eddington is going for two. That's what it is.

• 55:24Bill Simmons?

  Eddington's going for two, the whole movie.

• 55:26Speaker 01

  Right.

• 55:27Bill Simmons?

  No, you don't understand. You gotta go, Eddington went for two. Okay.

• 55:30Speaker 01

  And they'll laugh at you. Yeah.

• 55:32Bill Simmons?

  Cool. Yeah.

• 55:36Bill Simmons?

  Titans, Cleveland. So Cleveland is gonna be in the running for the best pick. Number one pick, somewhere in there, but there's really no number one pick. Ever, nobody even knows. McShay's is gonna be talking about this for the next six months. The last one, Bills Bengals, which I was saving for the end here, which was an incredible game. Allen is still 14-1 for MVP, which I don't understand because if they beat the Pats next week.

• 56:05Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 56:06Bill Simmons?

  There's a real chance like they could kind of flip things around and Allen was just superhuman today. I mean, this was like, yeah, it's hard not to think he's the best player in the league. As great as Drake May has been, I think the MVP case is there for May. I get it. Even though Stafford took the lead a little bit today, but May, Allen is just, there's nobody like this dude.

• 56:26Speaker 01

  Not too many guys who like they're scrambling and you're like, oh, he'll just get six here for the first down. He gets 46, you know, in the snow.

• 56:34Bill Simmons?

  It's like a locomotive.

• 56:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, it really was. That was a great game. That was so much fun, that game.

• 56:39Bill Simmons?

  I loved it.

• 56:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:41Bill Simmons?

  It was so surprising that Burrow fucked up.

• 56:43Speaker 01

  I know.

• 56:44Bill Simmons?

  He had two picks. One wasn't his fault, but the first one was like a Max Brosmer pick.

• 56:49Speaker 01

  Right, right.

• 56:51Bill Simmons?

  It was awful and it was at a huge part of the game, right? And it felt like, I don't know. I thought they were going down and score. I just.

• 56:58Speaker 01

  But then James Cook fumbling twice was in a huge part of the game, right? So like you can't be happy for that guy. He does so much, but you can't be thrilled with him for more than like 20 minutes at a time. Yeah, that was, it's kind of a bummer for Cincy to be out of it, out of it. Like they'll have some, like if you had a choice, if you could have Bengals, just from a viewing perspective, Bengals, Cowboys in the Super Bowl, or whatever the Super Bowl is gonna be, what would you pick? Just, just for viewing.

• 57:26Bill Simmons?

  Why can't that be the like Pro Bowl?

• 57:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:28Bill Simmons?

  Instead, it's just like the two best teams that didn't make the vote by the fans, playing for $100 million. Paid for by Amazon.

• 57:36Speaker 01

  It could be in the morning too of the Super Bowl. It just could be the early game. That'd be good.

• 57:41Bill Simmons?

  Poor Burrow.

• 57:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:46Bill Simmons?

  I don't know what to make of this season. We're not gonna have Burrow in the playoffs. We're not gonna have Lamar.

• 57:53Speaker 01

  Right.

• 57:54Bill Simmons?

  We're not gonna have Mahomes. We're not gonna have Andy Reid. We're not gonna have John Harbaugh, who might get fired.

• 58:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:01Bill Simmons?

  It's just weird. It's one of the weirdest seasons we've had in a while. We'll take one more break for-

• 58:06Speaker 01

  Knicks and Drake May, and we're gonna have, who else?

• 58:10Bill Simmons?

  Jaden Danes' career is already somehow over after two years.

• 58:13Speaker 01

  Bryce freaking Young. Yeah. Good job.

• 58:15Bill Simmons?

  Bryce Young's in. All right, quick break. This episode is brought to you by Fire TV. You ever sit down, ready to watch the game, only to search and scroll endlessly? If so, you need Fire TV. It shows you your live games from your favorite teams all in one place, right on the home screen. No more searching. Just sit down and turn on Fire TV. Separate subscriptions may be required. Feature and content availability may vary. This episode is brought to you by WeatherTech. Whether it's a pumpkin spice coffee that goes splat in your seat, or a weekend tailgate that leaves your trunk full of gear and who knows what, you're gonna want WeatherTech in your vehicle. Whether you call it fall, autumn, or spooky season, whether the mess is your fault, the kids, the dogs, or the weather's fault, you're gonna want WeatherTech. For American-made floor liners and a cargo liner that laugh in the

• 58:59Bill Simmons?

  face of fall weather, visit weatherTech.com today. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Football has a play for just about everything, and whether it's a flea flicker, or a tush push, you need a plan that fits your unique situation. That's why State Farm takes the time to get to know you, so they can help personalize coverage for your life and for your budget. Now that's a solid game plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Guess the lines. You've won a couple in a row.

• 59:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's eight to six now, week fifteen.

• 59:28Bill Simmons?

  Your fanbase has been fired up.

• 59:29Speaker 01

  I know, I know. I talked to a lot of people.

• 59:31Bill Simmons?

  I was with Dave Jacoby this weekend, and it's all he can talk about.

• 59:34Speaker 01

  He loves it.

• 59:35Bill Simmons?

  He's like, "Do you think Sal can pull this off?" He's asking me, the person who's in control of my own picks.

• 59:41Speaker 01

  Right. What'd you tell him? You told him yes, right?

• 59:44Bill Simmons?

  I said, "I thought he could."

• 59:44Speaker 01

  Okay, good. Don't trash talk me now.

• 59:48Bill Simmons?

  Thursday night.

• 59:50Speaker 01

  16 games rest of the way. Here we go.

• 59:53Bill Simmons?

  This is our last normal slate of the year. You getting sad yet that football's almost over?

• 59:58Speaker 01

  Oh, I after Thanksgiving, I'm a mess. And as my fantasy teams go away, this is this is right, right in it, right? And my regular team.

• 1:00:07Bill Simmons?

  Oh, can we talk about that really quick?

• 1:00:08Speaker 01

  Damn it. I thought I could sneak it by you. Yeah.

• 1:00:11Bill Simmons?

  Well, you meant you.

• 1:00:12Speaker 01

  I know.

• 1:00:13Bill Simmons?

  You shouldn't have.

• 1:00:14Speaker 01

  I know.

• 1:00:14Bill Simmons?

  My double deuce team, lot of injuries this year, just so much heart, much like Trevor Lawrence. People thought, people not talking about us enough. But this is in our knockout league that our friend Brad has gotten kicked out of five times now.

• 1:00:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, five times.

• 1:00:30Bill Simmons?

  Five out of 15 years, something. So it was looking semi bleak for me today. I'm going against Mahomes and Kelsey. And I have Vidal tomorrow night and then Nico Collins today. And I'm down like eight points. And Mahomes puts up 7.4 and Kelsey puts up a 1.3. They combined for less than nine points. Nico Collins beats them by five points. And I, and it looks like I make the playoffs unless Vidal just comes in, fumbles and then.

• 1:01:01Speaker 01

  You gotta bench him.

• 1:01:02Bill Simmons?

  Pulls a hamstring.

• 1:01:03Speaker 01

  You could just bench him. He'll be fine.

• 1:01:05Bill Simmons?

  How do I bench him?

• 1:01:06Speaker 01

  Take us, take a zero. I'm not telling you. Figure it out.

• 1:01:10Bill Simmons?

  Can I do that?

• 1:01:12Speaker 01

  Yes, you can. Yeah.

• 1:01:15Speaker 01

  You can. I mean, everyone will hate you if that's what ends up happening.

• 1:01:19Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I can bench him for Remondre Stevenson.

• 1:01:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, put in someone that's doesn't play. Yeah.

• 1:01:25Bill Simmons?

  Oh, that's really smart. What happens if they recalibrate the scores and then like they figure out a day later?

• 1:01:29Speaker 01

  That's tough. That's tough. That's a, that's a good risk.

• 1:01:32Bill Simmons?

  You know what? I want to keep him in. I want to roll up the score on, on cohorts.

• 1:01:36Speaker 01

  I see.

• 1:01:37Bill Simmons?

  Send a message if I see him for the playoffs. But it was, it was amazing rooting against Mahomes and Kelsey and they're having like the worst game of their entire career. It's like, this is great. All right, guest lines, Thursday night.

• 1:01:50Bill Simmons?

  What a stinker. Our first really bad one in a while. Can Al skip this one?

• 1:01:54Speaker 01

  Can what?

• 1:01:56Bill Simmons?

  Can Al, can we not send Al? Can we send somebody else to this?

• 1:01:58Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, what is he?

• 1:02:00Bill Simmons?

  Have Collinsworth call and be like, Al, you don't, you don't need to go to Tampa, Al.

• 1:02:05Speaker 01

  He loves it. It's warm weather.

• 1:02:06Bill Simmons?

  There's gotta be somebody else.

• 1:02:08Speaker 01

  He's not gonna freak out too much. It'll be 68 degrees.

• 1:02:11Bill Simmons?

  No, no, I love the gentleman clubs there.

• 1:02:14Bill Simmons?

  It's a great scene.

• 1:02:17Speaker 01

  I hit this one exact, so good luck off the bat.

• 1:02:22Bill Simmons?

  Bucks Falcons.

• 1:02:25Bill Simmons?

  I might skip this. This will be one where I'll tell Howard and Eduardo right now. We don't have to wait until after the Thursday night game to finish the podcast. We'll finish it before this game. Yeah.

• 1:02:36Speaker 01

  I thought you skipped picking it. I was like, that's interesting. You just gave me one. All right.

• 1:02:40Bill Simmons?

  Bucks minus six was my guess.

• 1:02:43Speaker 01

  It's five and a half. That's what I had.

• 1:02:46Bill Simmons?

  Vegas zone.

• 1:02:47Speaker 01

  Good guess. I want to bet this. I can't bet this. They suck. They suck so bad, Tampa Bay.

• 1:02:56Bill Simmons?

  This is a bad game.

• 1:02:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, they blew it with this.

• 1:03:01Bill Simmons?

  And they can't flex either. Well, this isn't a bad game. Sunday marquee game. What an honor to have my team in the marquee game. Patriots Bills in New England.

• 1:03:10Speaker 01

  Good job.

• 1:03:10Bill Simmons?

  Wow. Lot of stuff going on here.

• 1:03:15Bill Simmons?

  Rabel's record out of a bye. Do you know this? Thirty-five and oh.

• 1:03:20Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:03:21Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I looked it up. Thirty-five and oh.

• 1:03:23Speaker 01

  No, it is not.

• 1:03:25Bill Simmons?

  Something like that.

• 1:03:26Speaker 01

  He hasn't had thirty-five buys. Was he coaching in the eighties? What are you talking about?

• 1:03:33Bill Simmons?

  So he's had a lot of wins in a row. I forget what the numbers.

• 1:03:36Speaker 01

  It looks great for his age. Wow.

• 1:03:37Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:40Bill Simmons?

  I have this hardcore. It's in New England hardcore tic tac. Hardcore. Pat's minus one and a half.

• 1:03:47Speaker 01

  Oh, good. I'm glad you picked that way. It's the other tic tac. It's plus one and a half. I said plus two. I said the Bills favored by two.

• 1:03:55Bill Simmons?

  Bills are favored.

• 1:03:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, yes, sir.

• 1:03:58Bill Simmons?

  Woo.

• 1:04:00Speaker 01

  They need it more. They didn't know about the thirty-five and oh mark for, uh, for Vrabel.

• 1:04:05Bill Simmons?

  Oh, that is a. You know what? I know we already had the nobody believes in us police in Jacksonville, but we're gonna have to send some, some people over to New England.

• 1:04:15Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:04:16Bill Simmons?

  Okay.

• 1:04:19Bill Simmons?

  I'm really surprised by that.

• 1:04:21Speaker 01

  Take your Pats in a teaser, plus seven and a half. Bang. There you go.

• 1:04:25Bill Simmons?

  I mean, this is massive, massive, massive home game. For, for the crowd, like everyone's gonna be excited all week, coming to buy, like they'll have, I feel like they're saving stuff for this game. I thought they, after, second half of that Monday night game?

• 1:04:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:04:43Bill Simmons?

  I thought they roped it up the rest of that game. They didn't want to show anything in the second half.

• 1:04:48Speaker 01

  What was this line when Buffalo was home? I'm looking, was that week seven or something? What week was that?

• 1:04:53Bill Simmons?

  Oh, it was high. It was like, uh, seven and a half, something like that. Seven, seven and a half, eight.

• 1:04:58Speaker 01

  All right. So they're not, wow, they didn't, they adjusted a little bit, but not too much.

• 1:05:03Bill Simmons?

  All right. You're up two, nothing on me already. Four watchables. Ravens Bengals, had to put this on here. Um, it's in Cincinnati. I have the Ravens favored, even though they've looked like crap. Ravens minus two and a half.

• 1:05:16Speaker 01

  Uh, you get it exactly. I said one and a half. Why should, why should anyone like the Ravens in this situation? Honestly? What are they better at at this point? Maybe their defense slightly?

• 1:05:28Bill Simmons?

  What's the most fun Derrick Henry team next season?

• 1:05:32Speaker 01

  Oh, where he goes, huh?

• 1:05:34Bill Simmons?

  Chiefs?

• 1:05:36Speaker 01

  No, he wants to go to a winner, right?

• 1:05:39Bill Simmons?

  Ah.

• 1:05:41Speaker 01

  Denver? Someone like Denver?

• 1:05:45Speaker 01

  Doesn't want a chance to win a title?

• 1:05:48Bill Simmons?

  Oh my God, that was a drive by shooting.

• 1:05:50Speaker 01

  Oh, come on. It's fine.

• 1:05:52Bill Simmons?

  Nick Wright was 50 50 to go to work tomorrow. Now he's like, now he's doubtful.

• 1:05:59Speaker 01

  Enjoyed a day off.

• 1:05:59Bill Simmons?

  Right. It was like a bullet in Nick Wright's neck. Unbelievable.

• 1:06:03Speaker 01

  How about the Texans?

• 1:06:07Bill Simmons?

  Texans.

• 1:06:07Speaker 01

  Derrick Henry on the Texans.

• 1:06:09Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that's good. Has he been on the Texans? He'll hit this point where it's like, was he on that team already?

• 1:06:14Speaker 01

  Right. Yeah.

• 1:06:16Bill Simmons?

  All right. Chiefs home for the Chargers. Technically, Chiefs season not over.

• 1:06:24Bill Simmons?

  I have the Chiefs.

• 1:06:26Speaker 01

  Go ahead.

• 1:06:26Bill Simmons?

  Chiefs minus three.

• 1:06:28Speaker 01

  You're gonna get it. I said two and a half.

• 1:06:31Speaker 01

  It is four and a half. It was five and a half before the game. Four and a half.

• 1:06:36Bill Simmons?

  That's dumb.

• 1:06:39Speaker 01

  I mean, if they win this now, I guess a short week for the Chargers. I don't know what they're thinking here. Just don't score enough.

• 1:06:50Bill Simmons?

  Packers at Denver. This is an, I mean, would you have had this as the marquee game or Bill's Pats? The only reason I had Bill's Pats was that there's more at stake in that game. But Packers Broncos could be the fucking Super Bowl.

• 1:07:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I'm just, I like points at this point of the year, you know? Hit, try to hit this exact because I did.

• 1:07:14Bill Simmons?

  Packers, Denver. So it's funny. I had one team favored in this game by one and a half, and then I flipped it to the other team.

• 1:07:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:07:21Bill Simmons?

  The more I stared at it and I decided it would be Packers minus one and a half.

• 1:07:24Speaker 01

  All right. You had the right team favored, uh, two and a half. That's what I had.

• 1:07:29Bill Simmons?

  You got that?

• 1:07:29Speaker 01

  Yep. Got it exactly.

• 1:07:33Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, this is a, this is the, uh, the gambler saying, we don't really believe in you yet, Bo Nix. We know you're looking good at some of these crappier teams, but not sure we believe in you against a good defense.

• 1:07:47Speaker 01

  And just gambling.

• 1:07:49Bill Simmons?

  To show it to us.

• 1:07:49Speaker 01

  Psychology, you're like, oh, boy, Green Bay looked pretty good. They're back. No problems there. Denver screwed us with that Raiders thing. How do they never not beat them by three touchdowns? I'm taking Green Bay and then Denver shows up.

• 1:08:01Bill Simmons?

  If this gets to three, I think the Broncos are a live pick for me.

• 1:08:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm with you.

• 1:08:06Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, two and halves. I just, I just feel like we never had two and halves until like the last five years.

• 1:08:12Speaker 01

  No, I know.

• 1:08:13Bill Simmons?

  Till AI, I feel like it's AI's fault.

• 1:08:15Speaker 01

  Really? AI?

• 1:08:16Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, AI figured it out. Like, no, all these lines that were three should be two and a half. We'd make more money. Now it's just two and a half.

• 1:08:22Speaker 01

  I'm gonna ask chat GPT, uh, why the lines are all two and a half? And if they hesitate, I'll know you're right.

• 1:08:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:08:30Bill Simmons?

  Ask after, when, after we're done with the pod. It's a good idea.

• 1:08:34Bill Simmons?

  Rams, home for the Lions. I might be off on this.

• 1:08:41Speaker 01

  That's a good one.

• 1:08:42Bill Simmons?

  I think I went too low. This is a great game though. I did Rams minus four.

• 1:08:47Speaker 01

  That's what I said. Five and a half.

• 1:08:50Bill Simmons?

  Hmm. Yeah, I knew I should have gone higher.

• 1:08:56Speaker 01

  It's tough now.

• 1:08:57Bill Simmons?

  Lions are running out of guys.

• 1:08:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:08:59Bill Simmons?

  Branches out now, Jesus.

• 1:09:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's rough on the defense. They're they get the rest advantage though here 10 days. I don't know. I don't. They ran it up on Dallas, but we were due to play a sloppy game. And that's just kind of what that was. That's all I'll say.

• 1:09:18Bill Simmons?

  How do you feel about George Pickens?

• 1:09:20Speaker 01

  Great, dude. It's gonna be a lot of fun. Do you think like, do you think that's true? Like, he cost himself like 10 to 15 million dollars on like one or two plays where he gave up?

• 1:09:29Bill Simmons?

  Funny, I watched that whole game and did something in my intro for the podcast after. I didn't really notice the picking stuff as much. I thought it was like two plays.

• 1:09:38Speaker 01

  That was it. I mean, it's in my feed all day long. So that's what it was. It really was just two plays, but but

• 1:09:44Bill Simmons?

  People were really fired up about it.

• 1:09:45Speaker 01

  It's more more troubling when he goes at it with like Richard Sherman and stuff. I don't think I don't know. It's also really tough to pay two receivers top dollar and be good, right?

• 1:09:55Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:56Speaker 01

  We're seeing with the Bengals now. Exciting.

• 1:09:59Bill Simmons?

  I would recommend against it.

• 1:10:00Speaker 01

  You don't think it's good? Yeah.

• 1:10:02Bill Simmons?

  I don't think it's a good idea. So on Fanduel, the offensive player of the year, JSN is now minus 370.

• 1:10:07Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 1:10:08Bill Simmons?

  Gibbs is plus 600. Taylor's plus 850 and then McCaffrey, who has a chance to go 1000, 1000.

• 1:10:17Speaker 01

  He had a bye.

• 1:10:17Bill Simmons?

  It's 25 to one. Yeah, he's down to 25 to one. I'll just say this. I Taylor was the best player I was watching all season, non quarterback for a while and it I just

• 1:10:31Bill Simmons?

  I agree with what Sheila and Solak were saying on the podcast the other day, like Gibbs. Eye test wise, it just feels like he's the best at his job over any receiver, running back, tight end.

• 1:10:47Bill Simmons?

  But I think he, I really do think, I agreed with what those guys said. I think he gets penalized because of the team he's on, because they have so many weapons. That it's like, oh, but he's on Detroit. It's like, I don't know, man. I wondered like from a game planning standpoint, if you polled the 32 defensive coordinators and you were like, who is the scariest guy?

• 1:11:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:05Bill Simmons?

  I feel like Gibbs would win.

• 1:11:06Speaker 01

  Right. Yeah, you have to prepare for him differently.

• 1:11:09Bill Simmons?

  And Gibbs, you have, you're having like extra meetings about Gibbs. Now we gotta talk about Gibbs coming out of the backfields. Now this inside run with it, like you're doing like an extra three hours on Gibbs stuff, I think.

• 1:11:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, you, I mean, look, the eye test is great, but stats count too. And he's up there against Barry Sanders for like a 24 year old. Like, he's ridiculous. And you know, he's hit speeds of up to 62 miles an hour. Sometimes.

• 1:11:35Bill Simmons?

  I saw that. That seemed really fast.

• 1:11:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:38Bill Simmons?

  JSN's been great. I see him being the favorite, but a four to one favorite seemed crazy to me.

• 1:11:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:43Bill Simmons?

  But it feels like that should be a little closer. Okay. The fairly watchables, we only have two Panthers at the Saints. I think all games with playoff implications, but this will also be a fun game because Saints already beat the Panthers. I think Shuck is like, if I'm the Saints, I'm not going in the draft thinking I need a quarterback. Like I, I think he's been good. I'm for a rookie. By the way, we had four non first round rookies playing today at one point.

• 1:12:10Speaker 01

  What do you mean, at quarterback?

• 1:12:12Bill Simmons?

  Today, four rookies, none of them picked in the first round. We're all playing today. Think about how weird that, playing quarterback.

• 1:12:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is weird.

• 1:12:21Bill Simmons?

  Including him.

• 1:12:22Speaker 01

  And now you're gonna have the top five teams, arguably three or four, don't need a quarterback, right? What do you do with Tennessee? I'm not, I'm still not sure.

• 1:12:31Bill Simmons?

  They're trading down, but who's trading up?

• 1:12:33Speaker 01

  Yeah. This is gonna be a weird draft.

• 1:12:37Speaker 01

  This is gonna be a weird one.

• 1:12:38Bill Simmons?

  I have the Panthers favored by two and a half at New Orleans.

• 1:12:41Speaker 01

  Uh, you get it. I went higher. I bought into the hysteria. I said four and a half. It is exactly two and a half.

• 1:12:49Bill Simmons?

  Great.

• 1:12:51Speaker 01

  Wait, what's the score here?

• 1:12:52Bill Simmons?

  Tough game. That might be a stay away.

• 1:12:53Speaker 01

  Four to four. Oh, I hate, I hate that division again. We were so right to neglect it.

• 1:13:00Bill Simmons?

  This is, I think, the hardest line of the day. Seahawks home for the Colts.

• 1:13:09Bill Simmons?

  And the Colts need it.

• 1:13:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:13:13Bill Simmons?

  I Riley Leonard against an awesome defense. I thought maybe double digits was the answer, but I went low. I think I went too low. Seahawks minus eight and a half.

• 1:13:23Speaker 01

  You're gonna get it. I said eight. Damn it. It's 10 and a half. Oh, 10 and a half.

• 1:13:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I said, I don't was a bad job today.

• 1:13:32Speaker 01

  That's a tough. That's a tough place to win. Riley Leonard, he's gonna have to make some plays.

• 1:13:41Bill Simmons?

  So if you have the Seahawks fantasy defense, good times are ahead in the first round of the playoffs.

• 1:13:47Speaker 01

  That's a good one. San Francisco is a good one against Tennessee, as we'll see in a second.

• 1:13:52Bill Simmons?

  I have some bad news. The poop factor has six games in it.

• 1:13:59Speaker 01

  This is what happens when there are no buys or anything. They have to play the whole slate.

• 1:14:02Bill Simmons?

  I guess, you know what? Let's go five because maybe this goes in as a fairly watchable. Is Bears Browns a fairly watchable or a poop factor?

• 1:14:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's fairly watchable.

• 1:14:12Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I think the way the Shador thing everyone's gonna talk about.

• 1:14:15Speaker 01

  You know, we do our bring up pregame show. We do the, we do the pre-production meeting. We try to stack the games, kind of like what you're doing, like the best, talk about the first best ones first. We always move the Browns up because there's a Shador prop. There's a Miles Garrett prop. There's, there's fun stuff going on with them.

• 1:14:31Bill Simmons?

  Stefanski tanking or just having a head injury.

• 1:14:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:14:35Bill Simmons?

  I have the Bears at home favored by eight over the Browns.

• 1:14:39Speaker 01

  Um, you get that too. I said nine. Why isn't this nine? It's seven and a half. Shit, 64 you're up.

• 1:14:51Bill Simmons?

  Poop factor, five games. Giants home for Washington. So Daniels got hurt. We don't know. We mentioned that all the Washington fans in my life who I took money from with my Pats versus Washington just were Chang like a speed bag.

• 1:15:05Bill Simmons?

  Giants, Giants at Washington, there's, or Giants home against Washington, there's gonna be no Jada Danos because they decided to play him and all the Washington fans in my life did not want Jada Danos to play anymore this season because they're out of the playoffs. He's already injured. What's the point of this? We could get a better draft pick. And yet he played and he got hurt again.

• 1:15:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, and it's unfortunate, but I, I played devil's advocate with that with House and I ran into my, our buddy Nathan Hubbard's Washington fan. What are you gonna do? You're just not gonna play these guys ever? Like, there's a quarter of the season left. It's like, it's easy to say from your television, your living room, but people buy tickets to these games. Why do they have to miss?

• 1:15:44Bill Simmons?

  I love your new, your new role as the voice of the fan.

• 1:15:47Speaker 01

  I know. Like, what, but why? It's like, what, for next year? What's next year gonna be? And then House is like, well, Mary.

• 1:15:53Bill Simmons?

  He's like, he's a skinny, fragile guy that has already been hurt a bunch of times and you could maybe hurt him for next season.

• 1:15:59Speaker 01

  Then he's not your guy. He's not gonna make it if that's gonna be the, how you view it. That's it. Sorry. I feel bad he got hurt, but people buying tickets for these games.

• 1:16:12Bill Simmons?

  Somebody's not gonna make it on that Washington team, but I don't think it's gonna be, I think it'll be either the head coach or Kingsbury would be my guess.

• 1:16:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:16:20Bill Simmons?

  Eagles.

• 1:16:21Speaker 01

  Wait, you didn't guess, you didn't guess?

• 1:16:23Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I didn't? Oh, Giants minus two and a half.

• 1:16:27Speaker 01

  It is two and a half. I said one and a half.

• 1:16:31Speaker 01

  All right. I got some work to do here. All right.

• 1:16:33Bill Simmons?

  I thought the Giants were okay on Monday night. I still feel like they're, like, when you think about two win teams, them versus the Raiders, they're like way better than the Raiders.

• 1:16:42Speaker 01

  I can't even remember Monday night. There were a couple of plays, right, that screwed them. No, I know, but what were the two, they had like two plays that were just really dumb.

• 1:16:49Bill Simmons?

  Well, we got a punt return.

• 1:16:51Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's dumb. Yeah. And was there a missed field goal or something?

• 1:16:54Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, there's a missed field goal.

• 1:16:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's hard to handicap those.

• 1:16:57Bill Simmons?

  But they, they kinda hung with us there for two hours.

• 1:17:00Speaker 01

  They're okay.

• 1:17:01Bill Simmons?

  Eagles Raiders in Philly.

• 1:17:05Bill Simmons?

  You know, what, nobody on the earth is gonna bet on this because nobody would trust this Eagles team, but it has to be Eagles 12 and a half, Eagles 13. I'm really Eagles 12 and a half.

• 1:17:14Speaker 01

  I might call bullshit on this, how close you are with these monster numbers. It is 12 and a half. I said 11 and a half.

• 1:17:19Bill Simmons?

  Who's taking the Raiders?

• 1:17:22Speaker 01

  Well, but doesn't mean you should get it exactly every single time. All right.

• 1:17:26Bill Simmons?

  But this is, that's the area that big favorites are gonna get. Nobody's taking the Raiders unless you're getting 13 points. Would you take the Raiders at 11? I wouldn't.

• 1:17:35Speaker 01

  No, of course. I took them at seven and a half today. So excited. They have a new, they have a new system, you know, where they just bring the field goal kicker out, if it makes sense or not.

• 1:17:46Bill Simmons?

  I just, Pickett's one of those guys where he'll, you're like, I could kinda see it.

• 1:17:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:17:50Bill Simmons?

  I'm still holding on to like a penny stock for him.

• 1:17:53Speaker 01

  You know, my favorite Gino, I feel bad for him. He was in and out of that game, but when he's in the end zone, they, they snap it from the two yard line, whatever. He backs up, he's in the end zone. He throws the screen to the guy in the end zone. Like, I think he likes hitting a receiver in the end zone, even though it's his own end zone. I'm like, oh, Jesus. Now this guy has to run six yards to get to the one.

• 1:18:14Bill Simmons?

  It's like the feeling of seeing a receiver catching the end zone.

• 1:18:16Speaker 01

  He celebrates. He puts his arms up.

• 1:18:19Bill Simmons?

  Tua had a classic today. I don't know if you saw it, because House and I took the Jets. We couldn't take a, we couldn't find a 15, so we're like, fuck it. We took the Jets. And it was a hint of a possible Jets comeback. And Tua's in basically his own end zone, goes back to pass, goes this way, and then is throwing a screen the other way. And this Jets guy's just running in for the one yard pick six, which is always the funniest play in football, but he like, kinda banged into the guy and he couldn't catch it. Tua has one of those a game.

• 1:18:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:18:50Bill Simmons?

  Like, some of the worst passes of the season, and it's him once a game, and the guy always drops it somehow. Anyway.

• 1:18:57Speaker 01

  It's a Madden glitch. Yeah, he really is sometimes. Yeah.

• 1:19:00Bill Simmons?

  You're like, how did you throw that? Jags home for the Jets. I have, uh, the Jags minus 10 and a half, probably too high.

• 1:19:09Speaker 01

  No, I had nine and a half. It's 11 and a half.

• 1:19:13Bill Simmons?

  Oh, that's definitely.

• 1:19:14Speaker 01

  They hate the Jets.

• 1:19:17Bill Simmons?

  I hate the Jets after today.

• 1:19:18Speaker 01

  I mean, what's it gonna be? Is it gonna be this, who was this schmo today? Who, I don't even know what, uh, Brady Cook? It sounds like a quarterback name, but.

• 1:19:30Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that sounds like AI or like the Madden generator created a name. Your new quarterback is Brady Cook. He's got a 64 rating.

• 1:19:39Speaker 01

  Southeast Louisiana, so yeah.

• 1:19:42Bill Simmons?

  Texans home for the Cards.

• 1:19:44Speaker 01

  Is this an old school 2004 Sal and Bill three team teaser? I know you don't want to, I know you don't want to do the Eagles, but.

• 1:19:51Bill Simmons?

  No, it's illegal to put Trevor Lawrence in a tease.

• 1:19:53Speaker 01

  So with no Trevor Lawrence, no Hertz.

• 1:19:55Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, we had the Niners coming up. There's a Niners game coming up. That could be the last piece.

• 1:19:59Speaker 01

  All right.

• 1:20:00Bill Simmons?

  I have Texans Cards, Texans minus nine in Houston.

• 1:20:04Speaker 01

  Let's see what this moved to.

• 1:20:10Speaker 01

  Come on, where is this? Houston is home.

• 1:20:14Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:20:14Speaker 01

  Got it. Eight and a half. I had eight, I had eight and a half. I did get this, I swear.

• 1:20:24Speaker 01

  Well, that's a good one. Now what are they gonna?

• 1:20:27Bill Simmons?

  So they're doing the Kyler Murray, they're just not bringing him back because it's easier for them to get rid of a lot of his contract. But if he got hurt, there's some injury thing. We're doing that thing?

• 1:20:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. Let him play baseball. It's fine. He'll go on.

• 1:20:40Bill Simmons?

  Is there a team that would talk themselves into Kyler Murray next year?

• 1:20:45Speaker 01

  Could he start for like the Jets?

• 1:20:49Bill Simmons?

  You can't do that to the Jets.

• 1:20:52Speaker 01

  Well, that's gonna be your answer for whatever I give here.

• 1:20:54Bill Simmons?

  No, there's a couple others I was thinking.

• 1:20:57Speaker 01

  You could say it. They're in this league.

• 1:21:00Bill Simmons?

  Atlanta?

• 1:21:01Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:21:02Bill Simmons?

  Hmm.

• 1:21:05Bill Simmons?

  They can't think Penix is ever playing for them again.

• 1:21:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:21:09Bill Simmons?

  Said 17 knee injuries.

• 1:21:11Speaker 01

  He does. He would be, he would fit in Atlanta on a lot of levels.

• 1:21:14Bill Simmons?

  I would want him indoors, probably in one of the Souths. I think his destiny is to be in one of the South divisions.

• 1:21:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:21:22Bill Simmons?

  It's because it's just weird shit happens in both of those divisions. So get him in there somewhere.

• 1:21:26Speaker 01

  You're destined for the South, young man. Take this plane ticket.

• 1:21:30Bill Simmons?

  Right.

• 1:21:31Speaker 01

  Southwest.

• 1:21:31Bill Simmons?

  Atlanta would be a good one for him. Niners Titans in San Francisco. And I think I'm too low on this. I said 10 and a half for this.

• 1:21:41Speaker 01

  I said 11 and a half. It's 13 and a half.

• 1:21:44Bill Simmons?

  Oh my Lord.

• 1:21:45Speaker 01

  I don't think I'm close here. Wow, six, seven, eight, nine.

• 1:21:47Bill Simmons?

  Can't put that in a tease.

• 1:21:50Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:21:51Bill Simmons?

  What is, I'm up by one?

• 1:21:52Speaker 01

  No, you're up by like two, six, uh, nine, two, you're up by three. It's nine, six.

• 1:21:58Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I clinched. Great.

• 1:21:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:22:00Bill Simmons?

  Take that, Jacoby.

• 1:22:01Speaker 01

  Damn, Jacoby. So close.

• 1:22:04Bill Simmons?

  Sunday night, Cowboys, Vikings. Your team, still technically sort of alive. I guess you need the Phila- the Philadelphia Eagles to lose tomorrow against the Chargers.

• 1:22:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, at least that.

• 1:22:19Bill Simmons?

  And then you win this?

• 1:22:21Speaker 01

  It makes me sad to watch Washington play like they did today. And I know it's because the quarterback went out, but you know, they play the Eagles twice. I need, I need them to show up. Whatever. It's over. It's fine.

• 1:22:33Bill Simmons?

  But meanwhile, I did watch one minute of that Vikings game, but apparently they played great.

• 1:22:37Speaker 01

  Yeah. Like people were upset with me, like, see, you didn't give J J McCarthy enough credit. Like, look, I like when quarterbacks play well, don't you? Like, I want to have good quarterbacks in the league. I just don't want them to come to life when I bet against them, you know?

• 1:22:51Bill Simmons?

  I want either really good ones or really bad ones. I thought Brosmer, Brosmer's pick six was my favorite football moment, probably of the month.

• 1:23:01Speaker 01

  So Tyler Shuck does nothing for you because he's kind of in the middle.

• 1:23:04Bill Simmons?

  He's in the middle.

• 1:23:05Speaker 01

  He's not a guaranteed fourth quarter interception.

• 1:23:07Bill Simmons?

  Just like watching football on a Sunday. Yeah, he's in the middle. Although he's fun from a like backdoor cover. Or getting frisky as a big money line thing. I want to figure out Ringer 107 next year. I really feel like we gotta work in underdog picks. Like Ringer 107 should move a little bit more like our Sunday pregame show.

• 1:23:26Speaker 01

  So there's just a certain picks, categories of picks a little bit? Yeah.

• 1:23:31Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Cause I thought, uh, I thought the Texans as an underdog would have been a really fun, like just the underdog money line. This, the Saints against the Bucks was like a really obvious money line one. That would have been a fun one to go after.

• 1:23:47Bill Simmons?

  Sunday night, Cowboys at home. I have them in the Vegas zone here at minus five and a half.

• 1:23:52Speaker 01

  That's what I had too, and it's six and a half.

• 1:23:58Speaker 01

  I mean, but what's the, we're gonna be eight, eight and one. The Eagles are gonna end up having like 11 wins, 10 wins. And it's gonna be like, what did we go crazy about?

• 1:24:08Bill Simmons?

  It's gonna be a weird vibe for those Eagles playoff games.

• 1:24:11Speaker 01

  Yeah. What seed is that looking like right now?

• 1:24:15Bill Simmons?

  Uh, well, they won't, they won't top either of the NFC West teams.

• 1:24:21Speaker 01

  They have the Bills, they have two against Washington, Vegas and the Chargers tomorrow. 10 or 11, right?

• 1:24:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Monday night.

• 1:24:31Speaker 01

  Three. Yep.

• 1:24:32Bill Simmons?

  Steelers home

• 1:24:36Bill Simmons?

  for the Dolphins. And if, let me tell you something, if this isn't in the Vegas zone, I don't know anything. This is the most Vegas zone game matchup of the year. This is it. We've reached peak Vegas zone.

• 1:24:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:24:48Bill Simmons?

  I went Steelers minus four and a half.

• 1:24:50Speaker 01

  It's not, it's, I, I hit this one exactly. It's three and a half. I'm gonna recount these, six, eight.

• 1:24:56Bill Simmons?

  You lost.

• 1:24:57Speaker 01

  No, yeah, it's 10, eight. Yeah, you won 10, eight. Nine, six in the week.

• 1:25:01Bill Simmons?

  How is that game not in the Vegas zone?

• 1:25:04Speaker 01

  They don't, they have no idea what to do with the Steelers. I don't blame them. I feel bad for anyone who has to set these Steelers lines.

• 1:25:12Bill Simmons?

  My goal for the rest of the year is to get a Steelers game correct. That's my new goal. And four weeks left.

• 1:25:20Speaker 01

  I was talking to Anthony DiBundo, my co-host on several shows during the week, Tony Tokenz. And he's like, the Steelers special, they just outgrew it. They just can't do it anymore. They're kind of lost with it. That was the, lose the first half, win the game. Like they didn't even do it today.

• 1:25:36Bill Simmons?

  Well, you should have, I, once that story came out about they could buy out Tomlin in March.

• 1:25:41Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:25:42Bill Simmons?

  It was like, ah, they're definitely winning.

• 1:25:44Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:25:45Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to you by Michelob Ultra. Excitement is in the air. That's right. It's the start of NBA season. I can't wait to get together with friends, share some Michelob Ultras and watch Tip Off. Plus, as the official beer sponsor of the NBA, Michelob Ultra is getting you closer to the action with experiences that make you feel like you're courtside to actual courtside tickets. Enter now. For a chance to win at Michelob Ultra dot com slash courtside. Michelob Ultra Courtside 26 to 27. No purchase necessary. Opening US residents 21 plus begins on October 1st, 2026. Ends on June 30th, 2027. Multiple entry periods. See official rules at Michelob Ultra dot com slash courtside for free entry. Entry deadlines, prizes and details. This episode is brought to you by Sony Pictures Classics.

• 1:26:29Bill Simmons?

  A perfect crime film, says the Daily Beast. John Torturo gives a career best performance. Don't miss the acclaimed new thriller, The Only Living Pickpocket in New York. Torturo stars as an aging master pickpocket. Whose latest score puts him in the crosshairs of a ruthless crime family. It's also starring Giancarlo Esposito, Tatiana Maslany, Will Price and our guy, Steve Buscemi. See the film that the LA Times calls instantly classic. The Only Living Pickpocket in New York. Now playing in theaters nationwide. Today's parent corner is brought to you by Workday. Are you a forward thinker? Then you need an HR and finance platform that thinks like you do. Workday is the AI platform that helps propel your organization, your workforce and your entire industry. Into the future.

• 1:27:14Bill Simmons?

  Workday, moving business forward, forever forward. Why don't you start us off?

• 1:27:20Speaker 01

  Uh, okay. So, um, I like, I'm a lunatic with my children, like in terms of like asking dumb questions. And I insist on answers, right? Like I used to do this with my cousin Jimmy. When I'd go out there, I'd, you know, I'd be like 11, he'd be 14. I wouldn't let him go to sleep before he'd answer the questions. Like if one of your parents had to die, which would you pay? And he would like stall for like two hours and then he finally.

• 1:27:43Bill Simmons?

  By the way, you used to do that to me when we worked together.

• 1:27:45Speaker 01

  Right, exactly. It's great, right?

• 1:27:48Bill Simmons?

  Simmons, Simmons. If you could only save one of your parents, which one would you save?

• 1:27:53Speaker 01

  And you said your father. Yeah, well, cause your mother's wearing that thing.

• 1:27:58Bill Simmons?

  I refuse to answer.

• 1:27:59Speaker 01

  Your mother's safe because she's got.

• 1:28:00Bill Simmons?

  No, don't say that. She'll get mad at me. She'll put a curse on me.

• 1:28:03Speaker 01

  She didn't, no, you did not say that.

• 1:28:05Bill Simmons?

  I refuse to answer.

• 1:28:06Speaker 01

  I have it recorded, but it's fine. Uh, no, um, so I, of course I do this with my kids. What's the point of having kids if you're not going to do this with your kids? So I'm like, yeah, I like, I ask them if one of your cousins had to live. In a tree the rest of their life, what would it be? And which of your friends would join a boy band? What's the weirdest thing you'd weirdest animal? You'd put on a slice of pizza cooked kangaroo? By the way, is the answer there? So now Harrison, my youngest is kind of turning the tables on me. He likes this kind of line of questioning only when he wants to play. But he asked me, and I want you to answer this.

• 1:28:39Speaker 01

  You get $10 million to complete a 20 yard pass to someone in your contacts in your phone. And if you lose, you get shot in the head. And so then it's like, the question's like, all right, who's doing the shooting? And he's like, well, I would shoot. I'm like, no, you're not going to shoot me in the head. And so then that ends up, but anyway, you die if it's incomplete. If it's complete, you get $10 million. What's your answer here?

• 1:29:08Bill Simmons?

  What did you answer?

• 1:29:09Speaker 01

  Well, I feel like I narrowed it down to three. Mikey Meatball's a ring of producer, very good athlete. I don't think he'd let me down. Van Lathan, very dependable, athletic.

• 1:29:18Bill Simmons?

  Bad creaky knees.

• 1:29:19Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 1:29:20Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I don't know.

• 1:29:22Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:29:22Bill Simmons?

  Could stumble as you're throwing it.

• 1:29:25Speaker 01

  I think Van comes, comes to here and, and, and our friend tall John, because I don't think I could overthrow him. You know?

• 1:29:32Bill Simmons?

  Right.

• 1:29:33Speaker 01

  He's like, he's about, you know, he's seven or eight feet tall. So those are my three. Do you have athletes in your?

• 1:29:40Bill Simmons?

  You know, I'm going to pick Craig Horrbeck.

• 1:29:42Speaker 01

  Oh, good. Okay.

• 1:29:43Bill Simmons?

  He's like six, almost six foot three. He's in the like late twenties, like maybe 29, 30. Still plays sports, does stuff. Uh, I would pick him or Tate. Tate, good hand eye, little younger, scratch golfer.

• 1:30:00Speaker 01

  Tate's gonna be upset with me for not picking him.

• 1:30:02Bill Simmons?

  Late twenties, I want that range. Can't pick even, even though my son can catch anything.

• 1:30:08Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:30:08Bill Simmons?

  I don't know. I don't know if I'd trust him. Maybe it's too much pressure. Maybe he'd, maybe he'd want me to get shot in the head.

• 1:30:13Speaker 01

  He wants to collect, he wants to collect that.

• 1:30:15Bill Simmons?

  Lose it.

• 1:30:16Speaker 01

  Let's go.

• 1:30:17Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. I would go Horrbeck or Tate.

• 1:30:20Speaker 01

  Tate's gonna be so upset with me for not picking him, but all right.

• 1:30:23Bill Simmons?

  This is the worst thing you ever did to Tate.

• 1:30:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, I know. All right, Tate, you're number four on the list.

• 1:30:29Speaker 01

  Damn.

• 1:30:29Bill Simmons?

  It's a pretty good one.

• 1:30:30Speaker 01

  That's good.

• 1:30:31Bill Simmons?

  So that's what, that's what your kid's doing now, coming up with crazy.

• 1:30:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, I like it. I don't mind it. Keeps things fresh.

• 1:30:42Speaker 01

  But you know Larry David, don't you? Isn't he in your contacts?

• 1:30:45Bill Simmons?

  Wouldn't Larry's.

• 1:30:46Speaker 01

  You wouldn't throw to Larry?

• 1:30:47Bill Simmons?

  Too old. Yeah, anyone over 50 wouldn't do it.

• 1:30:52Bill Simmons?

  So we had a little holiday thing yesterday and we got rid of the dogs. We brought the two dogs to my mother-in-law's house. And they stayed over with my mother-in-law. And it was great. It was like when you're, when you're just getting rid of your kids, when you actually have real kids. And I was thinking like, this is something we should probably do more often. Have an empty, cause Ben doesn't hang out with us. We get rid of the dogs. It's like, we have like an empty house. It's like we're, we're going nuts. And then that got, got me into this existential crisis of, would it just be better if we didn't have dogs? Even though I love Murph, he's probably my best friend.

• 1:31:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:31Bill Simmons?

  But it's like, I'd start, did this pro-cons list in my head. Cause it was like so nice to just wake up in the morning and we didn't have to like feed the dogs, walk the dogs, just lie in bed and postmate at Starbucks. It was like, I'm just not doing anything. This is great. I'm so glad they're not here.

• 1:31:49Speaker 01

  What do they do to get in the way, to get in the way of you postmating Starbucks? How do they get in the way?

• 1:31:54Bill Simmons?

  Well, just having to wake up, go down, feed them.

• 1:31:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:59Bill Simmons?

  Let them out, just like the responsibility of all that, walk them around.

• 1:32:05Bill Simmons?

  Just like, like, like, do you hit a point in your life? Cause I always wanted, I've always been a, a dog guy. Do you hit a point in your life when you get older where it's like, eh?

• 1:32:15Bill Simmons?

  Maybe this is kind of a pain in the ass.

• 1:32:17Speaker 01

  Really? See, I thought it was the other way. I thought, and you, you told a nice story about your dad. Like he wants a dog, right? Like I think when you get older and there's, there's no one in the house, the, the dog is even more necessary.

• 1:32:28Bill Simmons?

  This is why I did my pro con. I, I, I played it out in my head. I did a whole bunch of pro-cons.

• 1:32:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:32:34Bill Simmons?

  And I ended up with, it is better to have the dogs. But I did, it was the first time in a while where I was like, all right, let's actually think about this.

• 1:32:40Speaker 01

  Was it close with the pro con? It was close. For you to say this.

• 1:32:43Bill Simmons?

  You know, the shitting in the house was a con?

• 1:32:45Speaker 01

  You don't like that? Yeah.

• 1:32:47Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that happened recently after Thanksgiving when Murph dropped a big one in a, in a room.

• 1:32:53Speaker 01

  I mean, Murph accounts for like 38% of your parent corners and which are sponsored a lot of times. So I don't, you have to consider that. Was that on the pro?

• 1:33:01Bill Simmons?

  Well, are you gonna get another dog after your older dogs?

• 1:33:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think so. I think we're.

• 1:33:04Bill Simmons?

  Oh, you are? So you always have a dog?

• 1:33:06Speaker 01

  I think so. I think we have to, we have to have someone to yell at. We have to, you know, the wife talks in a weird voice. It's, it's, it's very routine at this point. Yeah.

• 1:33:16Bill Simmons?

  My only other parent corner is my son needs to start wearing contact lenses. Like his eyesight has been kinda lousy. Like just a bit lousy enough to get by where he could like see, but now it's kinda like Straining is doing this and his eyes, like he actually really needs to start wearing. So he's been wearing glasses when he studies at night and stuff like that. He just needs to do contacts, but he doesn't like putting his fingers near his eye. So when I was 13.

• 1:33:42Speaker 01

  You're a big contact guy for a long time.

• 1:33:45Bill Simmons?

  Well, I, I was glasses forever. Because I didn't want to put my fingers in my eyes. I didn't want to, I was like afraid to put my contacts in.

• 1:33:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:33:53Bill Simmons?

  So I thought for a parent corner, I would tell this story.

• 1:33:57Bill Simmons?

  I went to a hypnotist between eighth and ninth grade. And the hypnotist, over the course of three sessions,

• 1:34:07Bill Simmons?

  walked me through putting my finger in my eye and I got over the hump and I started putting my contacts in. And I've been wearing contact lenses ever since the fall of 1983. And now I'm at the point where I could be in an airplane as it's landing and bumping and just like fucking put my contacts in.

• 1:34:24Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:34:24Bill Simmons?

  But I couldn't get over the hump. So the question is, should we get a hypnotist for my son who doesn't want to put his fingers in his eye? Or is this insane?

• 1:34:33Speaker 01

  No, I, first of all, oh, so you'd get rid of the dogs and get a hypnotist? Oh, no, no. Okay. No, I'm getting.

• 1:34:40Bill Simmons?

  We tried to trade the dogs for a hypnotist.

• 1:34:42Speaker 01

  Why didn't you, wouldn't an ophthalmologist be able to take you through it better than a hypnotist? We can get some kind of.

• 1:34:48Bill Simmons?

  No, I didn't want to put my, I was afraid of my finger. For some reason, I had like a weird thing about my finger going near my eye. I just didn't like it.

• 1:34:56Speaker 01

  So I have more questions.

• 1:34:57Bill Simmons?

  I'd be like, ah, ah.

• 1:34:59Speaker 01

  How, what did he do? He or she do to get you to, like, what things did they say?

• 1:35:03Bill Simmons?

  We did that thing where you go into like the little hypnotist thing and then, and then he would walk me through visualization of putting contacts in my eyes and put the finger there and press it against and blink and make sure. And I would just kind of go through it. And it actually worked. I think hypnosis might be underrated.

• 1:35:20Speaker 01

  No, I think it does work.

• 1:35:22Bill Simmons?

  Like, do we do it for a baby doll to get him to stop smoking? Or is it more fun to just have him smoking?

• 1:35:27Speaker 01

  No, yeah, no, that's his essence. He needs to start and he wouldn't go anyway.

• 1:35:31Bill Simmons?

  He needs it.

• 1:35:31Speaker 01

  I would sit, I was on such a bad gambling streak. I wanted, I went to a hypnotist. Our cousin Jimmy set, set us up with this hypnotist he liked to stop gambling. This is like before I knew you. But the, when I got to him, it was a Friday and I was going to Vegas that weekend. And I said, whatever you do, can it kick in Monday? And he's like, get the fuck out of my office. What are you talking about?

• 1:35:51Bill Simmons?

  Oh, my God.

• 1:35:52Speaker 01

  So I had conditions, but I think it does work for people. Would Ben do that? Or would he just laugh at you?

• 1:35:59Bill Simmons?

  We're gonna, so his, apparently his girlfriend's gonna help him with it. And you just, once you get over the hump of it, you're good. But there's something about the mental block of doing that.

• 1:36:10Speaker 01

  Yeah. Well, the fact that you had it and you could relay that to him.

• 1:36:13Bill Simmons?

  I'm a success story. I've been wearing them forever. And it's, it's why my eyes look red and everything we do now in 4K. And people always think I'm stoned. It's because I have these giant fucking contacts in my eyes. Yeah. And if, and the other thing with contacts is you can't use like bisine or any of that to make your eyes whiter because you're just putting chemicals in there and it, and they have like these re-wetting drops, but they don't really work for me.

• 1:36:35Speaker 01

  It's so complicated. You never got the Lasix, right?

• 1:36:39Bill Simmons?

  No, my eyes, I'm like a minus 10 and a 10.5.

• 1:36:42Speaker 01

  So it's right in that range where you have to get either reading glasses or, uh, yeah, contacts.

• 1:36:47Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, there's no, no saving me. I really thought, I thought as we got older, I really thought they were going to figure out seeing and hearing.

• 1:36:56Bill Simmons?

  Didn't you think like in the eighties of like, oh, they're gonna figure this out. That we'll have no more blind people or deaf people. We'll have all this stuff. We'll, we'll, by 2000, they'll have it all.

• 1:37:05Speaker 01

  They're gonna have flying cars. There's gonna be a pill for baldness and, you know, all right, the fat thing, I feel like, you know, for a lot of money is resolving itself, but there's something for that. Yeah.

• 1:37:14Bill Simmons?

  Somehow we can't figure out seeing or hearing, but we can make videos of a cheetah coming into somebody's room and at AI where they steal somebody's baby and the cheetah leaves and it looks like a real video. Somehow we've been able to accomplish that.

• 1:37:28Speaker 01

  Need some kind of pill so that Murph doesn't shit all over the house and the prop.

• 1:37:32Bill Simmons?

  Maybe I need to hypnotize Murph. Maybe that's where this lands.

• 1:37:35Speaker 01

  Bring him.

• 1:37:35Bill Simmons?

  Can dogs get hypnotized?

• 1:37:36Speaker 01

  It couldn't hurt. Yeah.

• 1:37:40Bill Simmons?

  That's, uh, that's parent corner. You can learn more at workday.com. What else? Any other highlights before we go?

• 1:37:49Speaker 01

  That's it. I don't know. Everyone's screaming about the college football playoffs. You don't care, right? Like this is just.

• 1:37:54Bill Simmons?

  Well, I care about my James Madison guy, Chesney.

• 1:37:56Speaker 01

  Oh, you like Chesney?

• 1:37:57Bill Simmons?

  They made the playoffs. Yeah. Holy Cross from Holy Cross to James Madison, going to UCLA. That's my guy.

• 1:38:02Speaker 01

  And now he's playing Oregon. Yeah. But well, he won't even play the coach there, right? Uh, it's just such a mess.

• 1:38:07Bill Simmons?

  I thought he was gonna finish the season.

• 1:38:08Speaker 01

  He is. I know he did the other day, but, uh, yeah, I don't know. It's just like, I feel like this thing, this was like the worst week for football. These conference championships don't really mean anything.

• 1:38:19Bill Simmons?

  I know. They gotta figure that out.

• 1:38:20Speaker 01

  I, I just, they have to go to, they have to go to 16 teams because it's just unfair, no matter how you look at it. I really feel that way. Like Miami beat Notre Dame. So how are you gonna put Notre Dame in over them? Alabama, sure, three losses, but they played in a conference final, which these other teams didn't. So they get a play in the, the top two conference finals. So, um, just move it to 16 games. But I think Lane Kiffin overall, I just wanted to say this. I think he's taken a lot of crap for lying to kids. The people get righteous about lying to kids. You know how many kids I would lie to for like an extra $40 million? I would lie to like 500 kids. They make it like he, he took them to Bosnia and left them there. It's like, they're gonna be fine. They got scholarships. They'll get a new coach that kinda cares about them.

• 1:39:05Speaker 01

  Yeah. You lie to kids. Is that the worst thing he did? He took a hundred million more.

• 1:39:10Bill Simmons?

  Can I give you quickly?

• 1:39:14Speaker 01

  Basketball.

• 1:39:14Bill Simmons?

  A couple, well, a couple of basketball things that I just thought was interesting just on a Sunday night.

• 1:39:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, go ahead.

• 1:39:20Bill Simmons?

  The Celtics now have the fourth best odds to win the Eastern Conference at plus 650. They're a three seed and there's real feelings that Jason Tatum could be back in January. That's fascinating.

• 1:39:33Bill Simmons?

  Miami is 12 to one, but is probably the most likely team to get Giannis unless you want to say Atlanta, who's 11 to one. And those are the ones, if you wanted to make a Giannis play with one of those two teams.

• 1:39:46Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:39:46Bill Simmons?

  You could do it. The other one that's interesting is there's been some Trey Murphy trade buzz. And I think if San Antonio was able, San Antonio makes the most sense for him. Cause they have Devin Vassell's contract, could send that back and they have all these picks, right? And Trey Murphy's probably worth three first round picks.

• 1:40:08Bill Simmons?

  And if they got him and they had Castle and they had Dylan Harper and they had Wemba Yama and they have all the other guys they have.

• 1:40:16Bill Simmons?

  You know, they're not going to beat OKC unless somebody got hurt, but it's just like their odds are 25 to one. I think those odds would go down.

• 1:40:22Speaker 01

  Would you go something for the division? I'm looking at plus 320. Would they overtake the Rockets?

• 1:40:28Bill Simmons?

  Potentially.

• 1:40:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:40:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:40:31Bill Simmons?

  Then the only other one is Denver would be the wild card Trey Murphy team. Where they wouldn't be in any, everyone will say San Antonio, Detroit, they'll list all the usual suspects. But Denver could go Mac Daddy, trade Cam Johnson, who they just traded for. Throw some extra picks in there to New Orleans and get Trey Murphy.

• 1:40:54Bill Simmons?

  That's the only team that can catch OKC. OKC is minus 130 to win the West. And I honestly don't understand why that's not two to one.

• 1:41:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:41:03Bill Simmons?

  Denver is plus 450 and Denver's the only team that I think could chase them down. So.

• 1:41:08Speaker 01

  And the Spurs were 25 to one, is that what you said for that?

• 1:41:10Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. And then the other one is OKC, that's 74 plus wins is still dropping. And now it's plus 490.

• 1:41:20Bill Simmons?

  I honestly would be shocked if they lost 10 games. I don't see how it happens.

• 1:41:24Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:41:25Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I really don't. Like, right now, they're 23-1. It's like, every time they lose, it feels like an event. They're so good. They're so deep. I know there'll be some schedule stuff coming on later. They've won 15 straight. Their net stuffs. I just don't understand how they would lose 10 games.

• 1:41:42Speaker 01

  So 70.

• 1:41:42Bill Simmons?

  So that plus 490 is a really crazy number, I think.

• 1:41:46Speaker 01

  What's their baseline? 70 and 12? 70 plus is minus 114. 75.

• 1:41:52Bill Simmons?

  Right now, to win 70, they're minus 114, just to win 70. So it's four more wins.

• 1:41:58Speaker 01

  And 75 is plus 750. Alright, I'll do that.

• 1:42:01Bill Simmons?

  Here's the thing about the 74, and this is why I think it's a great bet.

• 1:42:06Bill Simmons?

  If they're a little close to it, right? If they're like 64-8 or something like that. Like, they're not gonna do the thing where like, yeah, we don't care about that. Like, at some point, you go for the record.

• 1:42:18Speaker 01

  They're going 10-0.

• 1:42:19Bill Simmons?

  And they're deep, right? And I think you would want to try to finish and try to get it, and you're, sometimes you're going against tanking teams. I just think, I can't believe plus 490. I think that should be lower. I think that should be like 2-1.

• 1:42:31Speaker 01

  I'm gonna do that. I'll lose on that.

• 1:42:33Bill Simmons?

  That jumped out to me.

• 1:42:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:42:35Bill Simmons?

  The Celtics over/under, this is another number I couldn't believe, 49.5 right now. So before the year, they were 42.5. So it's jumped seven wins, basically based on them looking good for two weeks.

• 1:42:50Bill Simmons?

  And then there was a Dallas one, too, I noticed.

• 1:42:53Speaker 01

  By the way, I told House this was gonna happen here. You were down on the Celtics coming in the year.

• 1:42:58Bill Simmons?

  I went to that Washington game. I was like, oh my, if one guy gets hurt, this team's gonna win 20 games.

• 1:43:02Speaker 01

  They're gonna make a little run right around the NBA Cup thing. They may not even be involved in the NBA Cup. You're gonna be back on them. And now you're gonna say, now they're gonna win 50 games plus, huh?

• 1:43:12Bill Simmons?

  Two things happen.

• 1:43:15Bill Simmons?

  I talked about it on Thursday a little bit. God, we got hypnotists for, no, um, Jalen's just been night after night has been toe to toe with whoever the best guy on the other team is like, he really did go up a level and Kate has been good all year, but this, this, uh, Jordan Walsh thing's like out of control. This is a guy like he couldn't get on the court the first two years. And even the first two weeks, it was like, kind of surprising when he was even out there in crunch time. And now he's turned into this destructive wing, like Reeves talked about him after the Friday game. He was like, that guy's really good. He's like really hard to score on. So they, they built this team with these wings that try really hard. They have shooting. They figured out how to bring in Simons and you know, they beat Toronto in Toronto

• 1:44:00Bill Simmons?

  day. That was, Toronto's been good this year. They have, they're putting together good wins over and over again. So anyway, 49 and a half seem high to me, but that's, you know, just, it says to how good they've been playing.

• 1:44:14Speaker 01

  Are you sad LeBron's 10 point streak is over?

• 1:44:18Bill Simmons?

  I thought it was the best way to end. I will say though, I never really cared at all about the 10 points.

• 1:44:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:44:24Bill Simmons?

  I thought the more interesting one to me was the Shea streak. Do you see that one? Like Shea is almost, I think he's getting close to 100 straight 20 point games.

• 1:44:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:44:34Bill Simmons?

  And the record's 126. Like that's one, that's like a baseball hit streak almost.

• 1:44:39Speaker 01

  That's great. That's great. But thousands.

• 1:44:40Bill Simmons?

  Think about all the shit that, well, but, but don't you think like, pick any great player of all time. Don't you think any of them, if they're like, all right, we gotta get 10 every night?

• 1:44:51Speaker 01

  No, of course, but it really means you haven't, you didn't twist your ankle horribly in the first quarter.

• 1:44:56Bill Simmons?

  Thing. Right. Yeah.

• 1:44:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's it. Yeah.

• 1:44:58Bill Simmons?

  And that's been one of the great things about, that makes LeBron so different than everybody else is the durability. Just they, like, the guy never fucking gets hurt. When he's hurt, it's even now at age 40, it seems shocking.

• 1:45:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:45:11Bill Simmons?

  But I thought, I'm more impressed by the 20 plus.

• 1:45:13Speaker 01

  All right. What about Bronny? Could he put together like a, a two point streak? Like, like a dozen or something?

• 1:45:20Bill Simmons?

  Lakers had a good win today.

• 1:45:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:45:23Bill Simmons?

  They won in, uh, in Philly and, and LeBron had his best game of the year. So we'll see. I'm interested to see what Rich, we launched our Rich and Max podcast tomorrow. Game over. They're taping in the afternoon and I'll be interested to see what Rich says about the Lakers. Cause I think he's gonna not hold back.

• 1:45:41Speaker 01

  He says he's not talking basketball. You didn't see that thing he came out with tonight?

• 1:45:44Bill Simmons?

  What?

• 1:45:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just college football. It's him and McShay.

• 1:45:48Bill Simmons?

  Oh, and we had the worst UFC ever this week.

• 1:45:51Speaker 01

  Yeah. By the way, I, you know, so that started my losing streak for the week. Of course I had Marab in a money line parlay and he went out there and he went like two for 25 and takedowns. And then what did he say? What disease did he have today? Did he say? He's like, I'm sorry, I was fighting, um, now I have to find it. It was like a serious thing.

• 1:46:11Bill Simmons?

  He claimed he had a disease?

• 1:46:13Speaker 01

  The norovirus. He's like, I've been fighting the norovirus all week. Like Lamar Jackson doesn't practice and it's unannounced and it's like, oh my God, this is like, come on Dana White. Let's, let's see a roster of everybody who has the norovirus and I'll be sure not to bet 70,000 on him. Whatever that number is.

• 1:46:32Bill Simmons?

  Well, I was thinking with the dislocated elbow 20 seconds, 26 seconds in, in the, in the previous match. Do they need a guy in the weight class who's just like the bullpen closer? If there's some sort of disaster and it has to be like in the first like two minutes of the match. If the match is over, it's like, you hear the, like the, the, uh, the glass break, the stone cold music. And it's like, and also this next guy comes running in and we just keep going.

• 1:46:57Speaker 01

  I like that.

• 1:46:58Bill Simmons?

  Probably not legal.

• 1:46:59Speaker 01

  No, it's, yeah, but too many broken bones early. You're right. No 10 point streaks in the UFC.

• 1:47:04Bill Simmons?

  All right. What do you got to plug this week?

• 1:47:05Speaker 01

  That's it, man. We're doing this Ringer Gambling Show, live shows on YouTube and Fandals Sports Network. I'm on Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday.

• 1:47:13Bill Simmons?

  It's great. It's great on the Fandals. Like to actually just pop on one of the cable channels and it's there. Yeah. It's all over the place.

• 1:47:19Speaker 01

  Promo for us on a Timberwolves game. It's fun. Good times and we occasionally give out winners. Yeah.

• 1:47:25Bill Simmons?

  All right. As always, good job by you.

• 1:47:28Speaker 01

  Good job by you, buddy.

• 1:47:30Bill Simmons?

  Thanks to Eduardo and Gahow as well. Don't forget Rich and Max, their podcast will be putting up probably tomorrow night. So get ready for that. It's called Game Over. Hope you subscribed to that one. Hope you checked out the Jeff Buckley documentary we did. We have, I think Wizkid's coming this week, but, and that one's really good, too. But Music Box Series on HBO. And Sal, next time I see you, we'll have an answer on Pats versus Bills.

• 1:47:57Speaker 01

  Oh, right.

• 1:47:57Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:58Speaker 01

  Make that Sunday night.

• 1:47:59Bill Simmons?

  I could be in a really good mood. I might be in not a great mood.

• 1:48:01Speaker 01

  Come on, flex that thing.

• 1:48:02Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. See you next week.

• 1:48:18Bill Simmons?

  Must be 21 plus and present in select states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star Casino, or 18 plus and present in DC, Kentucky, or Wyoming. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit rg-help.com. Call 888-797777, or visit ccpg.org/chat in Connecticut, or mdgamblinghelp.org in Maryland. Hope is here. Visit gamblinghelplineMA.org, or call 800-327-5050 for 24/7 support in Massachusetts, or call 877-8HOPENY, or text HOPENY in New York. This episode is brought to you by Searchlight Pictures Wild Horse 9. John Malkovich and Sam Rockwell. I like those guys. Star in the sharp-witted comedy thriller from Academy

• 1:48:59Bill Simmons?

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• 1:49:43Bill Simmons?

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