How Is This Possible... | Financial Audit

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Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:26Speaker 01

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• 0:53Caleb Hammer?

  To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube.

• 0:56Speaker 03

  So you know, a little like boob job? That would be fun.

• 0:59Caleb Hammer?

  All the boob jobs on this show. What is everyone doing boob jobs? What is that, like $20,000 to $20,000? You're in horrible debt.

• 1:05Speaker 03

  When you [bleep] it out there, that you're gonna like set a goal and you're intentional with it, you can put it on your board.

• 1:11Caleb Hammer?

  Your board?

• 1:11Speaker 03

  Yes, your board.

• 1:12Caleb Hammer?

  You [bleep] your board.

• 1:13Speaker 03

  I have spending amnesia.

• 1:15Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 1:16Speaker 03

  I don't like to look at my bank account.

• 1:17Caleb Hammer?

  Is that an option?

• 1:18Speaker 03

  It could be.

• 1:19Caleb Hammer?

  Now, how could it be? You're literally dying. You're struggling. Hammer Elite is the best YouTube membership on the platform, and I just upgraded it. Get access to exclusive shows every single day, Monday through Saturday. And for the rest of the month, I am paying for you to sign up. Sign up for Hammer Elite in the description or pinned comment below and submit proof of purchase at hammerelite.com. After that, I'll send you a $10 digital gift card that can be spent basically anywhere and in most countries. This is the best membership you'll ever join. That's a promise.

• 1:54Speaker 03

  Hi, I'm Bianca. I'm 38 and I live in Tucson, Arizona, and this is Financial Audit.

• 2:00Caleb Hammer?

  Usually don't know much about a guest before they come on the show, but I did hear you like to seventeen year olds.

• 2:06Speaker 03

  What? No, I don't.

• 2:09Speaker 03

  What is that?

• 2:10Caleb Hammer?

  You got impregnated by a seventeen year old.

• 2:13Speaker 03

  Oh, I mean, to be fair, I was also seventeen. God, I was like, I thought you meant right now.

• 2:17Caleb Hammer?

  Correction, you were eighteen, but not that it matters. I don't really care. I don't really care, but...

• 2:24Speaker 03

  When did I do that?

• 2:25Caleb Hammer?

  The last time I did that on the show, someone got very defensive, so I wanted to see what you did.

• 2:30Speaker 03

  I was like, what was, yeah, thank God, that was like 20 years ago.

• 2:35Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, actually, yes. Well, yeah. So, okay, wow, so this kid's out of high school then?

• 2:41Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, he has a whole job and everything.

• 2:43Caleb Hammer?

  Actually, no, you look very good for your age.

• 2:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:45Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well done. Congratulations.

• 2:47Speaker 03

  My grandma put me on a skincare routine at like 16.

• 2:49Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, that'll do it. And you're Asian or something, so that probably helps.

• 2:53Speaker 03

  Mexican.

• 2:54Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, one of those.

• 2:55Speaker 03

  Close enough.

• 2:55Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so what do you do for living in Tucson?

• 2:58Speaker 03

  I'm an operations manager.

• 2:59Caleb Hammer?

  Which I hear is a horrible place to live, by the way.

• 3:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:01Caleb Hammer?

  Horrible place. I hear it's like literal dog shit.

• 3:03Speaker 03

  Twice, but...

• 3:05Caleb Hammer?

  Horrible, horrible, horrible.

• 3:11Speaker 03

  No, we, A, it has really pretty sunsets and we have a mountain.

• 3:17Caleb Hammer?

  A mountain?

• 3:19Speaker 03

  Well, a mountain range. There's multiple mountains.

• 3:22Caleb Hammer?

  Well, usually it's rare to have a mountain.

• 3:25Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, we do have a mountain in the middle of the city.

• 3:28Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, what do you do?

• 3:29Speaker 03

  I'm an operations manager. Oh, you walk, like, hike in the mountain? Yeah, operations.

• 3:33Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, very good. For like, what kind of industry?

• 3:35Speaker 03

  Healthcare.

• 3:36Caleb Hammer?

  Right, okay, great. What do you make? Um, I bring home... Is it being the height of your career? Around 40 is peak earning, if I'm not mistaken, so...

• 3:43Speaker 03

  I hope not. Um, but I bring home 5,000 a month.

• 3:50Caleb Hammer?

  Well, if that's the height of our earning, you certainly

• 3:52Speaker 03

  I don't want that to be the height of my earnings.

• 3:55Caleb Hammer?

  Well, just if we're just talking like

• 3:56Speaker 03

  But like right now, yes.

• 3:57Caleb Hammer?

  Average person, right?

• 3:58Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 3:59Caleb Hammer?

  Well, no, actually, no, no, you're kind of right on track with like the median American at that point because that's 60,000 hours a year net. So not bad. And Tucson is not one of the more expensive cities, if I'm not mistaken.

• 4:11Speaker 03

  I mean, it can be if you have, yeah.

• 4:13Caleb Hammer?

  Definitely goes through its bubbles and waves as a boom town for sure. But Tucson, no one wants to live there because everyone would commit if they did. But $5,000 there, okay. How you doing on 5,000 hours in the desert with how many kids? How many 17-year-olds stuck it in you?

• 4:29Speaker 03

  One, four times. Well, more than four, but four took, yeah.

• 4:33Caleb Hammer?

  Good for him.

• 4:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, we have four kids.

• 4:35Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 4:36Speaker 03

  But one is already moved out, so he doesn't live with me.

• 4:38Caleb Hammer?

  Wait, what are the ages of these children?

• 4:40Speaker 03

  Um, 19, 17, 13, and 11.

• 4:44Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, it's honestly rare that I have someone that has kids that are like actual in like adult territory.

• 4:53Speaker 03

  I know, it's weird for even being a grasp.

• 4:55Caleb Hammer?

  About mother coming on Financial Audit, because usually I can't ask that.

• 4:58Speaker 03

  I haven't told anyone.

• 4:59Caleb Hammer?

  What are they going to think when they see mother on Financial Audit?

• 5:02Speaker 03

  Actually, no, I did tell my 17-year-old and he's very excited for me.

• 5:04Caleb Hammer?

  Because he knows he's gonna get cooked and he wants to?

• 5:06Speaker 03

  I don't know, but he knows I listen to you on the car rides and they get so annoyed. And they're like, do we have to listen to this? But I said, I'm going on your

• 5:12Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, what the fuck is wrong with you, 17-year-old piece of shit? Go stick it in an adult like your dad did, 17-year-old freak.

• 5:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, when my kid turned 18, he's like, you could be a grandma. And I'm like, oh, my God, I could be a grandma right now.

• 5:24Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, I mean, they are in those ages. Okay, so what's, what's going on? What's going on? You're certainly for Operations Manager, which sounds like a little bit more where you are. It ranges from 60,000 to over 100,000 hours a year.

• 5:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, I see now.

• 5:38Caleb Hammer?

  In Tucson, um, which averages landing between 70, which is closer to where you are. You're about 75, 70,000 to 90,000 hours a year. So you're in that like, yeah, you're in that middle range, okay. And top earners usually 100 to 120,000 dollars a year. So you're in that average for sure. Okay, so again, how you doing? Cause this, yeah, it's a lot of kids. We taking Garrett college now? That's a conversation we usually don't get to have on the show. What's going on?

• 6:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, so I actually, my second son's about to go into college and I want to pay for his college.

• 6:12Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you're, how are you gonna do that?

• 6:13Speaker 03

  I know.

• 6:14Caleb Hammer?

  Cause no offense, you don't get to come on the show unless you're, that's how it is.

• 6:17Speaker 03

  I know, but he deserves it, so I'll figure it out.

• 6:18Caleb Hammer?

  Well, hold on, what is the deserve? I don't know about deserve, you might.

• 6:21Speaker 03

  He does, he's a good kid.

• 6:23Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, fine.

• 6:24Speaker 03

  I'm not a grandma by now, that's a plus.

• 6:25Caleb Hammer?

  19 year old, nah?

• 6:26Speaker 03

  He is a good kid too.

• 6:28Caleb Hammer?

  Is he a piece of shit?

• 6:28Speaker 03

  No, of course not, no, no, no, no.

• 6:31Caleb Hammer?

  But he doesn't deserve it?

• 6:32Speaker 03

  I mean, honestly, if he, I told him if he wanted to go back to school.

• 6:35Caleb Hammer?

  What's he doing?

• 6:36Speaker 03

  He's a plumber.

• 6:37Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, plumbers will make a lot of money and I don't really see that being replaced by AI.

• 6:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, he's gotten three raises in the year that he's been there.

• 6:43Caleb Hammer?

  Well, with the 17 year olds, is he gonna go into community college? Are you gonna be enabling like an art degree at a four year institution?

• 6:48Speaker 03

  No, no, no, he's gonna go into HVAC.

• 6:50Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so this is a strange household. Real Mexicans, we like that.

• 6:54Speaker 03

  Right, yeah.

• 6:55Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, okay, full sombrero DNA, we love it, we support it.

• 6:59Speaker 03

  He did get a scholarship for half his school, so I think it will only be just a few thousand for the other half.

• 7:04Caleb Hammer?

  So why are you here then? What are we talking about?

• 7:07Speaker 03

  So I want to pay off the debt that I have now because I want new debt. Like I want to pay for other stuff.

• 7:15Caleb Hammer?

  Mortgage, I'm hoping.

• 7:16Speaker 03

  No, I already have a mortgage, but I wanna redo my backyard. But that's gonna be like $50,000, so I need to pay off all this debt.

• 7:24Caleb Hammer?

  It's Tucson, it's dirt!

• 7:25Speaker 03

  It doesn't matter, I live there, it's worth it.

• 7:29Caleb Hammer?

  How much does dirt cost, 50,000?

• 7:31Speaker 03

  No, I, concrete, I wanna redo my whole entire backyard.

• 7:34Caleb Hammer?

  You want concrete, you want your yard to be concrete? I guess it's better than the rest of the dirt in Tucson.

• 7:39Speaker 03

  I want it stamped to look like slate. Okay, so it looks, yeah, you know? So I have a wood fence right now and I wanna replace the wood fence. I know, right? So I wanna replace the wood fence.

• 7:50Caleb Hammer?

  With what, it's a yard?

• 7:51Speaker 03

  With a brick, no, a brick yard with the indoor lights, like the lights are on the brick.

• 7:55Caleb Hammer?

  What are you doing? What is this house even valued at, a $50,000 yard?

• 7:59Speaker 03

  Listen, it doesn't matter the value of my house.

• 8:01Caleb Hammer?

  What, are you gonna stay there forever?

• 8:02Speaker 03

  Yes, I wanna live there forever. What's the point of moving? I don't like moving.

• 8:06Caleb Hammer?

  What's the point of a different house?

• 8:08Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no. I don't need a different house. I can't do that. So anyways, I want it to be like all slate with a fire pit and a gazebo and a she shed. It doesn't matter. I live there. Like I live there and I'm not gonna ever move. So I might as well have what I want. Because I live there.

• 8:26Caleb Hammer?

  Usually what most people want is to not be in Tucson.

• 8:28Speaker 03

  I know, but I can't move.

• 8:29Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so 50,000 hour yard is what I'm, I guess I'm getting you to after paying off debt, going to debt for, what else?

• 8:36Speaker 03

  You know, I'm 40, so I could, almost 40. So you know, a little like boob job. That would be fun.

• 8:42Caleb Hammer?

  All the boob jobs on this show. What is everyone doing boob jobs? What is that like 20, $10,000? Fun?

• 8:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:48Caleb Hammer?

  How are they now?

• 8:50Speaker 03

  They're not fun.

• 8:50Caleb Hammer?

  Saggy?

• 8:51Speaker 03

  They're nonexistent.

• 8:53Caleb Hammer?

  They're tiny. You're flat.

• 8:54Speaker 03

  Yeah. So then I could have some, be like, do you guys wanna see my boobs?

• 8:59Caleb Hammer?

  Who's you guys?

• 9:01Speaker 03

  Whoever.

• 9:02Caleb Hammer?

  You just go around saying you guys wanna see my boobs?

• 9:04Speaker 03

  Not to random people.

• 9:06Caleb Hammer?

  First of all, I think honestly, other than like the weird chronically on freaks, most people would actually be pleasantly happy with that request. Just saying. So feel free to test that out. Number two.

• 9:15Speaker 03

  So we'll see what happens.

• 9:16Caleb Hammer?

  Number two, are you married?

• 9:17Speaker 03

  No.

• 9:18Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, wait, okay. So the 17 year old, you divorced him?

• 9:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 9:22Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 9:23Speaker 03

  That was my first husband.

• 9:24Caleb Hammer?

  He has a lot of time on his side.

• 9:27Speaker 03

  Oh, what is, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, no.

• 9:30Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so you're trying to get some tits so you can get another one? Oh wait, first husband, how many of you have had?

• 9:34Speaker 03

  I have two. I had two. Had two.

• 9:37Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Why'd you break up? There's a 17 year old, the father of all these?

• 9:41Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 9:43Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd you break up with the 17 year old?

• 9:44Speaker 03

  He, um, he fell in love with somebody else.

• 9:49Caleb Hammer?

  Someone with tits?

• 9:50Speaker 03

  She huge tits. Yeah.

• 9:51Caleb Hammer?

  That happens. That happens. That's true.

• 9:54Speaker 03

  I like her. Yeah.

• 9:56Caleb Hammer?

  Or her tits.

• 9:57Speaker 03

  You know, I like both her and her tits.

• 9:58Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, very good. I like that. Wait.

• 10:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:02Caleb Hammer?

  Whoa, whoa, whoa, no, no, no.

• 10:06Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, no, I had to do the math cuz I met someone in the green room, someone very hot, by the way, someone that, oh, my goodness, but she's your sister-in-law, meaning, okay, that's your brother. Okay, this is not, this is not a new wife.

• 10:17Speaker 03

  Her brother.

• 10:17Caleb Hammer?

  Because.

• 10:19Speaker 03

  I, I was married to her brother, but she's my sister because when you get married, then you become,

• 10:25Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, so.

• 10:25Speaker 03

  Then she becomes my sister, so now she's my sister.

• 10:28Caleb Hammer?

  So your ex is related to her?

• 10:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, my ex-husband is her brother.

• 10:34Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, okay, okay.

• 10:36Speaker 03

  I, yeah.

• 10:37Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, stunning, by the way, that lovely person in there. And, okay, you got with someone else and you, and none of these kids are that one?

• 10:49Speaker 03

  My second husband, no.

• 10:50Caleb Hammer?

  Was he 17?

• 10:51Speaker 03

  No, he was not 17, he was my age.

• 10:53Caleb Hammer?

  I'm right here, hello? Hammer Elite is free right now, but you gotta submit proof of purchase at hammerelite.com so you can get your $10 digital gift card that covers it.

• 11:01Speaker 03

  I know, thank God we didn't have kids.

• 11:03Caleb Hammer?

  That's a shame, you don't like that usually, okay.

• 11:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:05Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 11:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was very short.

• 11:08Caleb Hammer?

  Why, what happened?

• 11:09Speaker 03

  It was just short, shouldn't have done it, and then we did it. Uh, I don't know.

• 11:15Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd you end it?

• 11:16Speaker 03

  He wasn't great with money, he wasn't like.

• 11:18Caleb Hammer?

  Girl.

• 11:18Speaker 03

  I know.

• 11:19Caleb Hammer?

  Are you stupid, what are you talking about?

• 11:20Speaker 03

  Okay, well, he didn't make.

• 11:21Caleb Hammer?

  Not great with money, what are you, what are you on about? That is you.

• 11:23Speaker 03

  I, I make enough money to not be great with money.

• 11:26Caleb Hammer?

  You're literally talking about financing 10 to 20,000 hours of tits in a 50,000-hour yard in Tucson.

• 11:29Speaker 03

  I can afford it, I'm not making $13 an hour.

• 11:32Caleb Hammer?

  It's not about, no, no, it's never about income, it's about your entire financial situation.

• 11:35Speaker 03

  I'll fix it.

• 11:36Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, how much debt do you have? How much debt do you have?

• 11:38Speaker 03

  Oh, including the house?

• 11:40Caleb Hammer?

  That is debt, you.

• 11:43Speaker 03

  Um, I forgot what I bought my house for.

• 11:46Caleb Hammer?

  Fine, how much debt do you have, not including your debt?

• 11:48Speaker 03

  Please hold, I'll do it all together.

• 11:50Caleb Hammer?

  Not including your house, how much debt do you have?

• 11:51Speaker 03

  Okay, okay, I'm gonna say 20,000.

• 11:53Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, yep, you're broke in 37,000.

• 11:56Speaker 03

  Hmm, okay.

• 11:57Caleb Hammer?

  Hmm, so, if he's bad at finances and that's the reason you broke off, you're, what are you talking about?

• 12:02Speaker 03

  No, no, no, that's not really.

• 12:03Caleb Hammer?

  That's not even including a mortgage, that you wanna add an additional 52 for a yard, for dirt, for shit.

• 12:08Speaker 03

  It's concrete.

• 12:09Caleb Hammer?

  So you can look at the mountain.

• 12:10Speaker 03

  So I don't have, so I don't have to clean my yard.

• 12:13Caleb Hammer?

  Your entire thing's gonna be concrete?

• 12:14Speaker 03

  Yeah. I don't like yard work.

• 12:17Caleb Hammer?

  It's dirt.

• 12:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, but dirt grows weeds and then you have to clean it. I have a giant mushroom like the size of my head.

• 12:24Caleb Hammer?

  Second husband before you get your third.

• 12:27Speaker 03

  If you have doubts, don't get married. If you're trying to pull out. I did.

• 12:31Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and how long did that last?

• 12:33Speaker 03

  Like a year.

• 12:36Speaker 03

  Yeah, I.

• 12:37Caleb Hammer?

  And why'd you end it?

• 12:38Speaker 03

  It just wasn't working.

• 12:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and how long ago was that?

• 12:41Speaker 03

  Like two years ago, I think. Yeah, I'm sure.

• 12:44Caleb Hammer?

  So we're trying to get new tits so we can get a third.

• 12:46Speaker 03

  But to be fair, I have wanted tits since I was born. Like since I was like a teenager.

• 12:51Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, teenager, okay. That makes more sense. Since born's a bit odd, but.

• 12:55Speaker 03

  Since I was like a teenager, I'd wanted them.

• 12:56Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, why haven't you? You've prioritized obviously other things, including a JCPenney card.

• 13:02Speaker 03

  I know.

• 13:02Caleb Hammer?

  So it's like, you could have done this. No, you've been bullshitting your entire way to here. You could be in fake tit territory. Why aren't you? You could have them right now. Those things could be hanging on the desk, landing, flat. We've had them. We've had people come on and just flop them out. That could have been you. What have you been doing?

• 13:21Speaker 03

  Going on vacation.

• 13:22Caleb Hammer?

  So that's more important than tits?

• 13:23Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:24Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, sure, if it is. But listen, you've been going into debt for it. It's more important than yard. It's more important than paying for your kid's school. How are you paying for college? How are you paying for college for the seventeen year old? How are you paying for college for the thirteen year old in a few years? How are you paying for college for the eleven year old in a half a decade or so? A little more than that. But even still, how are you doing all of that if you have thirty seven thousand dollars in bad debt outside of your mortgage? Fifty thousand dollars of future debt for dirt and then twenty thousand dollars of future debt for tits, which by the way.

• 13:54Speaker 03

  But listen, if I pay off.

• 13:56Caleb Hammer?

  They don't even feel good anyway, so it's like others won't be a pretty. Well, actually, Brandon would appreciate them. Some people like them fake. I don't understand it. I'll never understand it. They just, it's not right. It doesn't work.

• 14:07Speaker 03

  I'll figure it out. It just happens.

• 14:09Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, that's.

• 14:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, it will happen.

• 14:11Caleb Hammer?

  That's our entire argument?

• 14:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, it will. Listen, no, I'll lock in and I'll pay off all this debt.

• 14:16Caleb Hammer?

  Why haven't you locked in? You're almost forty. Lock the in. What's wrong with you? Lock in. What are you talking about? You're gonna die in double your lifetime. What are you talking about?

• 14:23Speaker 03

  Sometimes you just have to go on vacation. Like, mental health vacation. It's a whole thing.

• 14:28Caleb Hammer?

  Mental health vacation doesn't have to mean actually going wherever. Mental health vacation could be literally just going on a walk around the block.

• 14:35Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no, no. If it's not on a flight, it's not a vacation.

• 14:39Caleb Hammer?

  What, road trips are not vacations?

• 14:40Speaker 03

  No, I cannot do a road trip.

• 14:41Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, you cannot, but people do road trips. People do road trips.

• 14:46Speaker 03

  No, for what? No.

• 14:47Caleb Hammer?

  To go places.

• 14:48Speaker 03

  No.

• 14:48Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, yeah, sure, fly there, but also this is not true. Vacation, like, you're going to a vacation destination. That's not the definition of a vacation, necessarily.

• 15:00Speaker 03

  I don't know. I feel like, I feel like-

• 15:02Caleb Hammer?

  How frequently are we doing these?

• 15:04Speaker 03

  I feel like I could probably once a quarter have a nice vacation.

• 15:08Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my gosh. How? No, you're in horrible debt. And you want to do $50,000 plus 20.

• 15:13Speaker 03

  If I pay off my debt, then I'll be able to afford it. The math will math.

• 15:16Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but how can you do that if you're gonna do a 50,000-hour yard and then 20 for tits? Which is more debt than you have now outside of your mortgage. Like, you'd be more than doubling your debt.

• 15:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, but see, this is manageable debt right now, so then, once it's paid off-

• 15:33Caleb Hammer?

  Manageable? Then why are you even the [__] here? If it's manageable and you're able to just lock in as you say. If it's manageable and you're able to just lock in as you say, why is the debt even here? You'd pay it off if it's manageable and you can just lock in. The [__] you talking about manageable?

• 15:46Speaker 03

  Maybe it's not quite manageable.

• 15:47Caleb Hammer?

  And what are you talking about this lock-in? What lock-in? There's no lock-in. You've never heard of locking in. What have you ever locked in in your life? Where's your lock-in? The only lock-in you did is when you saw a 17-year-old across the room, and you're like, I need that.

• 16:00Speaker 03

  He was walking on the side of the road. Thank you very much.

• 16:02Caleb Hammer?

  That's a good place to pick up a minor.

• 16:04Speaker 03

  I was one, too. It's not like it was wild.

• 16:06Caleb Hammer?

  You were 18.

• 16:07Speaker 03

  It happens.

• 16:08Caleb Hammer?

  But either way, I really don't care about that. I'm obviously just joking about that. Twitter, TikTok might, but... But don't care about them. They're not real people.

• 16:16Speaker 03

  I'll lock in.

• 16:16Caleb Hammer?

  I saw your face of concern when I said that. Don't worry. They're literally not real people. None of us take them seriously. Don't worry about it. Um, but obviously, I'm gonna joke about it. Okay, but either way, what's your lock-in? I don't see a lock-in.

• 16:29Speaker 03

  It will happen. I... It will happen.

• 16:32Caleb Hammer?

  No, that's not an argument.

• 16:34Speaker 03

  I mean-

• 16:34Caleb Hammer?

  Where's your lock-in? Okay, fine. We know how much came in, about five. How much went out, lock-in queen?

• 16:43Speaker 03

  Uh, I... Okay, here. I have spending amnesia.

• 16:48Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 16:48Speaker 03

  Spending it. You know, you just like swipe the card, tap to pay. Don't know. Done. Just...

• 16:54Caleb Hammer?

  No, that sounds like personal responsibility, your choice, being a dumbass.

• 16:59Speaker 03

  Like, $7,000. I'm gonna guess. Well, no, maybe less. I'm gonna say six. I'm gonna hope for five.

• 17:04Caleb Hammer?

  You should've stuck with the original one, because it's much closer to that. $6,715.32. Yeah, the payroll that came in was $4,907.88.

• 17:15Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 17:15Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 17:17Speaker 03

  Listen.

• 17:18Caleb Hammer?

  Lock in again, what the [__] are you talking about? Lock in, there's no lock in.

• 17:22Speaker 03

  Once upon a time, no, I did.

• 17:23Caleb Hammer?

  Once upon a time, what? Once upon a time, what? You have four kids, look where you've ended up. Nothing's working. What are you talking about?

• 17:28Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no.

• 17:29Caleb Hammer?

  And you're gonna pay for their college? Good the [__] luck.

• 17:31Speaker 03

  I, I did. I did lock in one time.

• 17:33Caleb Hammer?

  When?

• 17:34Speaker 03

  A few years ago.

• 17:35Caleb Hammer?

  Does it even matter? Dude, if you were doing perfect now and you're a complete degenerate piece of shit 10 years ago, I wouldn't have cared about that. I wouldn't have cared about that. I don't give a [__] if you're doing good 10 years ago if you're doing a piece of shit now. I don't give a shit. Okay, but tell me about your lock in. Sure, lock in.

• 17:51Speaker 03

  I lived with my dad and I paid off a lot of my debt.

• 17:54Caleb Hammer?

  You lived in with your dad, though? But now you're taking care of your kids? Okay, when was this?

• 17:58Speaker 03

  I lived with him like two years ago and then I bought my house.

• 18:00Caleb Hammer?

  What, your lock in was two years ago?

• 18:02Speaker 03

  I mean, locked in and I was like, buy a house.

• 18:05Caleb Hammer?

  You've accomplished this three in two years? I thought maybe this was like a decade of...

• 18:08Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no. I mean, it fluctuates. It's up and down. Sometimes I lock in and sometimes I forget to.

• 18:13Caleb Hammer?

  You saved 10,000 hours, I'm being told.

• 18:15Speaker 03

  Yeah. And then I bought a house.

• 18:17Caleb Hammer?

  You got from 10,000 to negative 37.

• 18:19Speaker 03

  I bought a house. I had to buy things for it. I, I had nothing.

• 18:23Caleb Hammer?

  No. That is not, had to? I don't think you know what had to is. You do not have to.

• 18:26Speaker 03

  No, it was a had to.

• 18:27Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 18:27Speaker 03

  It was a had to.

• 18:28Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, what's your had to? It's like an HVAC system, sure, but wouldn't that be taking...

• 18:32Speaker 03

  You know, like furniture.

• 18:33Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my. You know what had to is?

• 18:35Speaker 03

  A table and chair. Tables and chairs.

• 18:38Caleb Hammer?

  Do not have to in the moment. If it's gonna put you underwater and put you at risk of foreclosure, put you at risk of not being able to replace a roof, put you at risk of not being able to fix a window if it breaks, that is not a had to. You cannot buy a house and tell you at least, I would, at least 5%, I'd recommend minimum 10, but at least 5, I wouldn't get a house. And then also a full six-month emergency fund before doing it because people get [__] when they get into a house that they can't afford. Like, what are you doing? Had to? What the [__] are you talking about?

• 19:07Speaker 03

  I had to.

• 19:07Caleb Hammer?

  So that's your, that's your lock in?

• 19:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 19:10Caleb Hammer?

  The best you've ever done by 40 is 10,000 hours saved up on the side.

• 19:14Speaker 03

  Life happens.

• 19:15Caleb Hammer?

  That's your argument?

• 19:17Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. You know what?

• 19:19Caleb Hammer?

  No, that's not a good argument. Life happens. What are you talking about?

• 19:23Speaker 03

  It does, it just...

• 19:24Caleb Hammer?

  The most you've ever accomplished is $10,000 by 40 and it's gone. You're negative 37.

• 19:29Speaker 03

  When you put it that way...

• 19:31Caleb Hammer?

  No, what, that's the real way. What, okay, what other way is there to put it?

• 19:39Speaker 03

  I don't know. I

• 19:41Caleb Hammer?

  So what are you talking about? You can't tell me you locked in then. You've barely accomplished anything ever. And certainly nothing to show for it. I mean, a house show, that's good. If you've only bought it recently.

• 19:50Speaker 03

  Paid off my car. That's

• 19:52Caleb Hammer?

  When?

• 19:53Speaker 03

  An accomplishment. Oh, like five years ago.

• 19:56Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Great, yeah. So the more

• 19:59Speaker 03

  Actually, no, like two years ago.

• 20:00Caleb Hammer?

  The loan ended up being done. Yeah.

• 20:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:02Caleb Hammer?

  Great, yeah, that happens.

• 20:03Speaker 03

  That hap- hey, some, sometimes it doesn't happen.

• 20:05Caleb Hammer?

  You didn't do anything extra special with that. You just keep making your minimum payments until it was done. That's what, that's what happens. Same thing will happen to a credit card if you don't purchase on it in decades. I mean.

• 20:17Speaker 03

  That's fair.

• 20:18Caleb Hammer?

  Also, it was a $10,000 car. It's not like it wasn't crazy. It wasn't like a, that's, that's like what I would recommend anyway. So it's.

• 20:26Speaker 03

  Well, I don't know.

• 20:27Caleb Hammer?

  You don't know what, what, what do you not know?

• 20:30Speaker 03

  I think I did, I think I'm doing okay.

• 20:32Caleb Hammer?

  Why? You're one emergency happening to this house away from not being able to take care of your kids. I, it sounds like you have a good dad. But, I mean, you're ancient, so he's gonna be, he's extra ancient.

• 20:48Caleb Hammer?

  He's not gonna be around forever.

• 20:49Speaker 03

  I'll, I'll figure, like, listen, the new year's coming and then.

• 20:52Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, don't do that bullshit. People fall off their new year's resolutions endlessly. That's not a good argument. You should be taking actions today, even though it's a few days before New Year's.

• 21:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:01Caleb Hammer?

  That's what I would say.

• 21:03Speaker 03

  But, okay.

• 21:04Caleb Hammer?

  So what is your current budgeting? What do things look like now? How do you manage your finances now?

• 21:09Speaker 03

  Um, so I get paid my first paycheck and I pay all of my, the bills, right? Like electric, minimum payments on the credit cards. And then, or.

• 21:21Caleb Hammer?

  You pay your minimums out of the gate?

• 21:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:23Caleb Hammer?

  Manually? They're not automatically taken? So you, you get paid and you immediately take care of your manuals?

• 21:28Speaker 03

  Right, like some of the credit cards that I forget about are set up on automatic.

• 21:33Caleb Hammer?

  What are you talking about? Forget about?

• 21:34Speaker 03

  You know, I have like $60 on this card. I'm like, oh yeah, I forgot about that. And so that one is.

• 21:39Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so you do not sit down and actually manage your finances or else you would not forget about it?

• 21:43Speaker 03

  I forget that I use the card.

• 21:44Caleb Hammer?

  But if you sat down and managed your finances, you'd see that you used the card. I'm confused. Okay, continue. Let's talk about student loans. I know it's something we all avoid talking about, but if your private student loans are crushing you, Y Refi might be exactly what you need. They don't rely on your credit score alone. They look for borrowers who have the desire and the ability to repay. That is a game changer in a market where most lenders only see a number. Interest rates, under 6% guaranteed. That's practically a unicorn in student lending. Plus, they offer structured payment plans to lower your monthly bill, and even a co-center release program so your mom and dad can step off the hook.

• 22:28Caleb Hammer?

  Y Refi is known for their personal service. No faceless call centers. You get a dedicated rep who actually cares about your progress. They've got a 4.6 star rating on Google, which tells you people

• 22:42Speaker 00

  Hey Spotify listeners, when you travel with American Airlines, you'll enjoy comfort and convenience at every altitude. Before takeoff, unwind in the Admiral's Club Lounge, with curated self-serve offerings of hearty bites and refreshments. In-flight, stay connected with high-speed Wi-Fi, sponsored by AT&T. Your journey is designed to feel easy from the moment you check in to the moment you arrive. No matter where you're going, American gets you there. Book now at aa.com.

• 23:07Caleb Hammer?

  I genuinely like working with them. So if your private student loans are burying you, it is time to reach out. Y Refi wants to help you climb out of debt, not push you further into it. Check them out at yrefy.com/hammer. That is y-r-e-f-y.com/hammer, or call 888-973-3978. That is 888-973-3978. Break free from the high-interest trap and get your finances under control once and for all. That's kind of stupid, I'll be honest, but what's not is actually getting a checking account that gives you free money. Free money, we like free money. You can get up to $350 in bonus cash right now

• 23:50Caleb Hammer?

  when you sign up for the checking account that I use. Chime. Also, it makes your savings grow at a 3.5 APY interest rate. Guys, you can Financial audit and get free money at the same time. Who would have thought that's incredible? Check it out. Link in the description below. Sign up for time. Get that $350 right now in your checking account.

• 24:09Speaker 03

  So then I pay all the bills with my first paycheck and then I know that I need to save minimum of a thousand or 800 for my mortgage on my second paycheck.

• 24:18Caleb Hammer?

  So your paycheck to paycheck?

• 24:19Speaker 03

  I if I guess.

• 24:21Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 24:22Speaker 03

  Well, no, because I have extra money saved until I get paid again, but I can't.

• 24:27Caleb Hammer?

  And then.

• 24:28Speaker 03

  Like I need the second paycheck and a little bit of my first paycheck to pay my mortgage.

• 24:33Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, your entire second paycheck and your a little bit of your first paycheck? Your house.

• 24:37Speaker 03

  Well, just in case.

• 24:38Caleb Hammer?

  Just in case of what?

• 24:40Speaker 03

  I don't know. Things happen like.

• 24:42Caleb Hammer?

  No, you said for for your payment, you need your second check plus a little from your first.

• 24:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, because I like there to always be money in my bank account.

• 24:48Caleb Hammer?

  How much do you leave in your bank account?

• 24:50Speaker 03

  It's like the thousand dollars. I always want there to be.

• 24:53Caleb Hammer?

  And is there always a thousand dollars?

• 24:55Speaker 03

  Not always.

• 24:56Caleb Hammer?

  So what happens? Why not?

• 24:57Speaker 03

  I don't know. They just like tap the card and I'm like, oh shit.

• 25:02Caleb Hammer?

  So who taps the card?

• 25:03Speaker 03

  I do. I do.

• 25:05Caleb Hammer?

  When you say they shut the up, it's you.

• 25:07Speaker 03

  Okay, okay. I I tap my card, but after I pay my mortgage, then it's kind of like trying to make it through until I get paid again.

• 25:16Caleb Hammer?

  What? But no, you always have a thousand dollars in your account.

• 25:19Speaker 03

  No, not always.

• 25:19Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh. Exactly. So why is it always making it through? Even if it was 900 instead of 1,000, that shouldn't be a big struggle to the next few days.

• 25:29Speaker 03

  Well, because sometimes I well, okay, so I I don't like to look at my bank account.

• 25:35Caleb Hammer?

  Is that an option?

• 25:37Speaker 03

  It could be.

• 25:38Caleb Hammer?

  Now, how could it be? You're literally dying. You're you're.

• 25:41Speaker 03

  I don't.

• 25:41Caleb Hammer?

  You're struggling.

• 25:44Caleb Hammer?

  You just told me you struggled to make it to the next paycheck after your mortgage payment. How can you possibly not look at your checking account? How is that even an option?

• 25:52Speaker 03

  Because if you don't look, it didn't happen. I don't know. I don't know. It's just like it's annoying to look at like, you know, like when you look.

• 26:02Caleb Hammer?

  Really? It's more annoying to look at.

• 26:03Speaker 03

  All this money. And then I'm like, I mean, I mean, I mean, I spent all the money.

• 26:07Caleb Hammer?

  It's more annoying to look at an account than not have money when we're trying to purchase something.

• 26:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:14Caleb Hammer?

  It's more annoying to look at our account than not be able to pay for our kids' school.

• 26:20Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh. Selfish. Selfish?

• 26:23Speaker 03

  Okay, okay.

• 26:24Caleb Hammer?

  Selfish?

• 26:25Speaker 03

  Yeah. But I mean, it is kind of annoying to look in there.

• 26:28Caleb Hammer?

  No shit. No one likes to actually face their irresponsibility. But if you never do, it'll never be fixed. Never. Not once.

• 26:38Speaker 03

  And that's why I'm here.

• 26:44Speaker 03

  I'm here to fix it.

• 26:45Caleb Hammer?

  Right.

• 26:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:47Caleb Hammer?

  You're here to fix it.

• 26:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:49Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I'll be honest. Yes, I'll set you up with tools. I'll put you through our Master Your Money program. You get the premium version of the Dial-O-Wise Budget App. You get a lot of things. Course Career Certification, Fizz Card, you name it, you get it. Helium Mobile, all the goodies. We get you that.

• 27:05Caleb Hammer?

  I cannot, after this, actually...

• 27:10Speaker 00

  Hey, Spotify listeners. When you travel with American Airlines, you'll enjoy comfort and convenience at every altitude. Before takeoff, unwind in the Admirals Club Lounge with curated self-serve offerings of hearty bites and refreshments. In flight, stay connected with high-speed Wi-Fi, sponsored by AT&T. Your journey is designed to feel easy from the moment you check in to the moment you arrive. No matter where you're going, American gets you there. Book now at aa.com.

• 27:35Caleb Hammer?

  Be next to you every single day and control your spending. I cannot force you to sit down and look at your accounts uncomfortably. I can't force you to set up the Budget App. I can't force you to take the classes. I can't force you to do any of this, and look what your behavior has led to. You know what you're doing is already wrong, or else you wouldn't have applied to be on the show. That's how this works. And yet, you're [bleep] everywhere, so ever spending thousands more than you make on a monthly basis. So what is actually going to change after this? This is not a magical thing.

• 28:03Speaker 03

  It will change.

• 28:04Caleb Hammer?

  But why?

• 28:04Speaker 03

  Because I have a goal.

• 28:05Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. Have you never had a goal?

• 28:07Speaker 03

  Well, this time I have a real goal.

• 28:08Caleb Hammer?

  What's your real goal? Why was it fake last time? Your real goal is literally fake tits in a yard.

• 28:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's what I want to do.

• 28:14Caleb Hammer?

  You got a house, you saved up ten, then you...

• 28:16Speaker 03

  That was my first goal.

• 28:17Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but you did it in a horrible way, by the way.

• 28:19Speaker 03

  But it happened.

• 28:20Caleb Hammer?

  It happened, and you might be [bleep] for it. It sounds like you are, because you struggle between your mortgage payment and next paycheck.

• 28:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, but once I pay off my debt, then I won't have that struggle.

• 28:30Caleb Hammer?

  How do you pay off your debt if you spend 2,000 hours more than you make on a monthly basis and you struggle to make it to the next paycheck?

• 28:35Speaker 03

  When you put it out there, that you're gonna like, set a goal and you're intentional with it, you can put it on your board, you know?

• 28:41Caleb Hammer?

  Your board?

• 28:42Speaker 03

  Yes, your board.

• 28:43Caleb Hammer?

  Your board? Why don't you actually just put in some [bleep] work, you tit?

• 28:46Speaker 03

  I will. You will.

• 28:48Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so your entire argument is that you will.

• 28:51Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 28:51Caleb Hammer?

  Nothing has ever shown that you have, but your entire argument is that you will. That's it.

• 28:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:58Caleb Hammer?

  No indication that that is actually true, but you will.

• 29:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:03Caleb Hammer?

  You see why I can't necessarily just believe that and let go of that?

• 29:07Speaker 03

  It'll happen.

• 29:08Caleb Hammer?

  That's bullshit.

• 29:09Speaker 03

  It'll happen.

• 29:11Caleb Hammer?

  Great. Well, guess what? Your house has gone down 10,000 hours in value since you purchased it.

• 29:17Speaker 03

  Why?

• 29:19Caleb Hammer?

  Because the housing market goes up and down depending.

• 29:23Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 29:23Caleb Hammer?

  Especially in a boom state like Arizona. You have a negative equity position.

• 29:27Speaker 03

  Lord, I didn't know that. Okay.

• 29:30Caleb Hammer?

  What percentage did you put down?

• 29:34Speaker 03

  Um...

• 29:36Caleb Hammer?

  You don't even know what is wrong with you.

• 29:37Speaker 03

  I'll think of it.

• 29:40Speaker 03

  I don't know. Like five.

• 29:41Caleb Hammer?

  Well, it sounds like you didn't think of it. Are you just guessing?

• 29:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:45Caleb Hammer?

  Did you FHA it?

• 29:49Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 29:51Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 29:51Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 29:52Caleb Hammer?

  Do you not know what you did?

• 29:53Speaker 03

  No, I know. I know. I know what I did. I know what I did.

• 29:55Caleb Hammer?

  So you literally have no equity position in this house whatsoever?

• 29:59Speaker 03

  But it doesn't matter because I'm gonna live there forever.

• 30:01Caleb Hammer?

  Because if you enter a situation where sometimes there's a reason that you have to move, that's just something that happens. That's rare. That's probably not gonna happen, but it might happen. Or two, you get financially, you have nothing in savings, you are on debt, you get laid off. And we just had a good quarterly annualized GDP report. But who even knows? The job market's not great. What happens if you get laid off? What degree do you have?

• 30:27Speaker 03

  I'm screwed if I get laid off.

• 30:29Caleb Hammer?

  Exactly. What degree do you have?

• 30:30Speaker 03

  Um, I actually didn't finish my degree.

• 30:33Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, okay. What did you go to school for?

• 30:35Speaker 03

  Business management.

• 30:37Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, it's okay.

• 30:38Speaker 03

  And accounting.

• 30:40Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh, great, yeah.

• 30:41Speaker 03

  It's just like one...

• 30:42Caleb Hammer?

  Every time.

• 30:44Speaker 03

  I know.

• 30:44Caleb Hammer?

  So what happens if you get laid off? You can't afford this mortgage, so you need to emergency sell it. And then what do you do? You have to write a check to close. Write a check just to close your own house because you have a negative equity position.

• 30:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, that would really suck.

• 30:56Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, this is a position you've put yourself in. That's why I'm not letting you just the, "I'll figure it out" or "it'll work." Because that is not an answer. You are in a position where not just you, but three of your kids. Aren't in a beyond risky position. There's not a dual income situation here.

• 31:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:13Caleb Hammer?

  I'm trying to get the fakeies to get them.

• 31:15Speaker 03

  There's not. No, I don't want that. I don't want someone to move in with me.

• 31:19Caleb Hammer?

  Really? You're gonna stay single forever?

• 31:21Speaker 03

  I wouldn't say single, but they don't have to live with me.

• 31:23Caleb Hammer?

  You're never gonna live with a guy?

• 31:24Speaker 03

  There's not room in my closet for a guy's and his stuff. There's not room in my house for one.

• 31:29Caleb Hammer?

  And this is your forever home?

• 31:31Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 31:32Caleb Hammer?

  Alright.

• 31:34Speaker 03

  I don't want to make room for someone.

• 31:35Caleb Hammer?

  You know, I thought you owned, because you're old, I thought maybe you've owned this house forever, for a long time. So I was like, okay, maybe there actually is a dream house. You have been in for a year. You don't know this is your dream house.

• 31:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, I do. It's really cute. I looked at it. I knew it was the one.

• 31:48Caleb Hammer?

  Nope. Also, I looked at it right now. It's fine.

• 31:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's cute. It's really like a cute little girly house.

• 31:53Caleb Hammer?

  It's tile throughout. There's not even-

• 31:55Speaker 03

  It's concrete floors. Even better.

• 31:58Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, 10 years ago.

• 31:59Speaker 03

  What? It's cute. I really like it.

• 32:01Caleb Hammer?

  Concrete is not in, lady.

• 32:02Speaker 03

  It's in for me. It's easy to clean. And my electric bill is very cheap.

• 32:08Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, well, yeah, it's a tiny ass house. And it's literally, there's one little micro bush in the yard. The rest of it is just dirt. And a single story. It is brick.

• 32:17Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's crazy. But if I redo the backyard, it'll look so cute.

• 32:22Caleb Hammer?

  Dirt.

• 32:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's why it needs to be redone.

• 32:25Caleb Hammer?

  With a patch of turf, small patch. It's dirt, dirt, dirt. This is what a miserable, miserable place.

• 32:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, I hate it. I don't even look back there. I don't even look back there. That's why it needs to be redone.

• 32:36Caleb Hammer?

  This is so depressing.

• 32:37Speaker 04

  That park is all concrete. Look, there's a dog tied to a other dog.

• 32:41Caleb Hammer?

  Um, okay, the house is a very normal house, so I don't see how dream house is attached to this.

• 32:45Speaker 03

  Because it's mine. That's why. Because it's mine.

• 32:47Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but your next house would be yours too. And people always move on. I don't think, okay, okay. Very good.

• 32:53Speaker 03

  I don't think so.

• 32:55Caleb Hammer?

  To be clear, you have a negative equity position in this house and you want to invest 50,000 hours into the backyard?

• 33:01Speaker 03

  Basically, yeah. Maybe it doesn't have to be 50,000. Maybe it could be less.

• 33:07Caleb Hammer?

  You're, you're, you're broken. You're broken. What do you think your financial score is? 0 to 10, 0 being the worst, 10 being the best?

• 33:15Speaker 03

  I'll be generous and say a 2.

• 33:19Caleb Hammer?

  Why be generous?

• 33:21Speaker 03

  I don't know, because why not?

• 33:22Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not saying be negative or be generous, just be real.

• 33:25Speaker 03

  Maybe I'm like a 1.5.

• 33:28Caleb Hammer?

  All right, if you want to figure out what your financial score is, take the assessment. It is free at Calebhammer.com. Just takes a few minutes to where you stand in the world of money, where you need to improve, where you're already doing great. Just check it out. And if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up in the show, download the Dollar Wise Budgeting app. New features being added every single month. Actually, by the time you're seeing this, a big, big refresh and update may have just gone live or is going live very soon. And if you sign up for the annual version, like most people do, tens of thousands of active users for a reason. You get my budget-friendly cookbook signed by me mailed directly to you, only available through the end of March, and then it is gone forever.

• 34:06Caleb Hammer?

  All right, it is time to jump into these finances.

• 34:10Speaker 03

  Oh, God.

• 34:11Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, this isn't a big balance, actually. So I don't know what, okay, so Southwest, 75 bucks.

• 34:18Speaker 03

  Uh huh. So here's what happens. I paid off that card.

• 34:24Caleb Hammer?

  What? Yeah, 75, that's not hard to pay off. Isn't that what? What, lady?

• 34:31Speaker 03

  It's like 3,500 right now.

• 34:32Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, that's real locked interview, you dumb.

• 34:35Speaker 03

  It's not my, it's not my fault.

• 34:37Caleb Hammer?

  But come on, nothing is ever your fault. And every time I have a guest on the show, it is never your fault. Why is it not your fault? Maybe it isn't for the first time ever in the show's history.

• 34:46Speaker 03

  Okay, so my sister and her husband really wanted to.

• 34:51Speaker 03

  No, my other one.

• 34:55Speaker 03

  I know. She really, they wanted to go on vacation.

• 35:00Caleb Hammer?

  Sounds like an emergency.

• 35:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, so they invited me and another friend to go.

• 35:04Caleb Hammer?

  Sounds like an emergency.

• 35:06Speaker 03

  And they, they don't have a credit card with enough, like, they just didn't have credit cards at all.

• 35:12Caleb Hammer?

  We will, we will, emergency, I'm freaking out.

• 35:15Speaker 03

  So they asked if I can put it on my card.

• 35:17Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, you fucking dumb ass.

• 35:19Speaker 03

  And they would pay me back.

• 35:20Caleb Hammer?

  You dumb ass, first of all.

• 35:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 35:23Caleb Hammer?

  They're not paying for the entire vacation, including your part, so you would still part of your part.

• 35:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, my part is like eight hundred.

• 35:28Caleb Hammer?

  You dumb tits. So this is not, first of all, it is your fault because one, you agreed to it. Two, you were going there, so a part of your stuff would be on this card regardless. So you, you're locked in. Shut the up, not your fault. This is your fault. Shut up!

• 35:39Speaker 03

  It's California. It'll be okay. Actually, I don't really understand why we're going to, we're going to some conference.

• 35:45Caleb Hammer?

  You haven't even gone yet.

• 35:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 35:47Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, die.

• 35:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, we're going in September.

• 35:49Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you?

• 35:50Speaker 03

  It's California.

• 35:51Caleb Hammer?

  The American economy, but what is wrong with you? If it wasn't for dumb asses like you, who knows who we would be?

• 35:57Speaker 03

  No, no, no, they'll pay me back and everything will be fine.

• 35:59Caleb Hammer?

  Hopefully, I hope. But how much do they owe of the thirty-five?

• 36:03Speaker 03

  Well, well, my part was, my part was like eight hundred, so the leftover.

• 36:09Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so it is your fault, you dumb tit, because you still have eight hundred from zero on here. Pull it up, pull it up, you pull it up, pull it up!

• 36:17Speaker 03

  Okay, okay. Hold on, please hold.

• 36:19Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you? I just don't get it. Literally, seventy-five dollars, I'm so

• 36:25Speaker 03

  It'll be fine.

• 36:27Caleb Hammer?

  Is not a valid argument. I don't know how you can just keep saying that.

• 36:30Speaker 03

  Oh, and I might have accidentally put some stuff from Christmas on there, too.

• 36:32Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh, and that's why I had you pull up the card, you dumb piece of

• 36:37Speaker 03

  Just a little, it's okay.

• 36:38Caleb Hammer?

  Quiet. Playstation, movie theater? Let me start a screen recording. Ah, so I think you got like a water this morning. You got some bullshit?

• 36:49Speaker 03

  Oh, that's the hotel.

• 36:50Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah?

• 36:51Speaker 03

  Yeah. You know where they like hold your incidental?

• 36:55Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 36:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 36:56Caleb Hammer?

  Playstation?

• 36:58Speaker 03

  It's Christmas.

• 36:59Caleb Hammer?

  I think gas, shut, die. Movie theater, yeah, expensive for that many people. Food City, Rose Garden, Dillard's?

• 37:09Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, that's Christmas.

• 37:11Caleb Hammer?

  Expedia, probably to come here, maybe, I don't know.

• 37:14Speaker 03

  Yes, yeah.

• 37:15Caleb Hammer?

  At least you get reimbursed for that part. Southwest Airlines, Expedia bullshit dumbassery bullshit bullshit, American, American, American, American, American, American, American. Buzz Cafe. Oh, it's Beauty Lounge, two hundred and thirty-five dollars! What is wrong with you? You, not your fault. You, not your fault. Yeah, laugh about it. Cope laugh away. It's the only way you're gonna make it through this.

• 37:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:41Caleb Hammer?

  Good the luck. Good the flock, what is wrong with you? Three thousand five hundred three dollars and ninety five cents. What is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? What's your normal minimum payment?

• 37:56Speaker 03

  Hmm, I don't know, like seventy five dollars.

• 37:59Caleb Hammer?

  I don't even trust you, but seventy five dollars. Sure, it's at like a thirty percent interest rate of stupidity and death and dumbassery.

• 38:05Speaker 03

  It went down.

• 38:05Caleb Hammer?

  Could your sister not pay for it, huh? Huh?

• 38:09Speaker 03

  Um.

• 38:09Caleb Hammer?

  Because that scares me because how are they gonna pay you back if they can't pay for it themselves?

• 38:14Speaker 03

  It's because they had like filed for bankruptcy, so they didn't have any of their.

• 38:17Caleb Hammer?

  They didn't have any of their. Pay you back?

• 38:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, they will, they will, they will, they will.

• 38:21Caleb Hammer?

  Saw your sister file for bankruptcy, yet you're doing all of this? Oh, why can we not learn from other people? Instead of having to, you have to learn it through your own free? What's wrong with you? If you don't get punished, if you don't go through it yourself, you can't learn from it? You just saw what your sister went through with bankruptcy and yet you're doing this to yourself?

• 38:41Speaker 03

  Hers was way worse than mine.

• 38:43Caleb Hammer?

  Poor, now you. Cause.

• 38:45Speaker 03

  No, this is it. This is the limit of how high they will be.

• 38:48Caleb Hammer?

  Because listen, when you said in your statements, and what I thought was seventy five dollars, you've racked it up to thirty five, so shut up. This is the worst to you. That is not how this works.

• 38:58Speaker 03

  This is the worst, like here, Karin.

• 38:59Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. That is not how this works. It has literally got worse since you applied.

• 39:05Speaker 03

  It'll be fine.

• 39:05Caleb Hammer?

  Since you said in your documents, since well after your first or second call through the application process.

• 39:11Speaker 03

  The tickets went on sale and you had to have the money for the. The tickets went on sale, you had to have the money there to buy them.

• 39:17Caleb Hammer?

  Doesn't matter, listen to your logic, listen to your excuses, listen to your coping. That is why this will not be the worst, because there will always be something to make excuses and cope and dumbassery about. You.

• 39:29Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh, what? What?

• 39:32Speaker 03

  I just.

• 39:33Caleb Hammer?

  What do you want? What?

• 39:34Speaker 03

  Honestly, I, um, a budget, right? But can we add in like vacation?

• 39:39Caleb Hammer?

  Die, no. You, you have kids, you selfish. What is wrong with you?

• 39:45Caleb Hammer?

  Seriously, what is wrong with you? That is so selfish and disgusting of you. You have children, you've promised to pay for their college. I don't know how that's gonna happen. You're gonna take out student parent plus loans.

• 39:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:54Caleb Hammer?

  That's more debt. We're adding more debt to the pile.

• 39:57Speaker 03

  No, no, it'll, it'll even out because I'll pay off, I'll pay off this one.

• 40:01Caleb Hammer?

  No, no.

• 40:02Speaker 03

  The other one, you just like switched around.

• 40:03Caleb Hammer?

  No, cuz your debt's worse than I even had. Okay, so now it's, what is it? Like closer to, but it's like 42 now. And you're about to go again, 50 for the [bleep] dirt.

• 40:13Speaker 03

  No, no, I won't.

• 40:14Caleb Hammer?

  20 for the parent plus.

• 40:16Speaker 03

  I won't do that.

• 40:17Caleb Hammer?

  20 for the titties.

• 40:18Speaker 03

  I won't do any of that until this is paid off.

• 40:21Caleb Hammer?

  No, you don't understand what I'm saying, you actual, I'm sorry, dumb [bleep]. Listen, listen, 20 for student, 20 for tits, 50 for house.

• 40:32Speaker 03

  Oh, the math altogether is more than this.

• 40:33Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh, you got there. You figured it out, accounting. Well, you didn't get the degree, I guess. But neither did I, so.

• 40:43Speaker 03

  Okay, you know what? Fine, you've convinced me, maybe. I'll do like 30 on the backyard.

• 40:49Caleb Hammer?

  You're literally Mexican do it yourself.

• 40:51Speaker 03

  I can't do it myself.

• 40:52Caleb Hammer?

  Really? It runs through your DNA. I can't do it myself. I'm a pussy. I have no manual labor skills.

• 40:58Speaker 03

  I don't like manual. I'm tired. I don't even wanna do my yard. It takes like two hours every month. I gotta work on my yard.

• 41:06Caleb Hammer?

  But you were born for this.

• 41:08Speaker 03

  I was not born for this.

• 41:09Caleb Hammer?

  I'm being racist right now. Let me be racist.

• 41:12Speaker 03

  Cuz, I don't, yeah, I was not born for that. Or I could find someone who could do it for me.

• 41:20Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, and other Mexican, I'm sure there's a lot in two son. Huh?

• 41:23Speaker 03

  Someone like who will do it at a very low price cuz I'm cute.

• 41:29Caleb Hammer?

  You haven't gotten them yet. They're not there. There's nothing for you to show yet. You can't like.

• 41:36Speaker 03

  Right?

• 41:36Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, please do my yard for me.

• 41:37Speaker 03

  You know what? My personality gets me kinda far sometimes, depending where we are.

• 41:41Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, two ex-husbands.

• 41:43Speaker 03

  Listen, I'm a great wife, bad picker of husbands.

• 41:46Caleb Hammer?

  Never your fault, huh?

• 41:47Speaker 03

  No, I said I picked them bad. I picked bad ones.

• 41:50Caleb Hammer?

  But you're a great wife. I'm sure you were perfect in the relationship.

• 41:53Speaker 03

  I'm sure some people could argue their points, but.

• 42:00Caleb Hammer?

  Too late pieces here so far.

• 42:02Speaker 03

  Oh yeah. See, sometimes I forget.

• 42:06Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you?

• 42:07Speaker 03

  So sometimes I'm really good at my budget. I put it on my phone when the due dates are due.

• 42:11Caleb Hammer?

  It doesn't matter if it's sometimes. I'll just interrupt you.

• 42:13Speaker 03

  And then sometimes I forget.

• 42:15Caleb Hammer?

  A budget doesn't matter if it's only sometimes. It just doesn't.

• 42:20Speaker 03

  You know, when it happens, it's great.

• 42:23Caleb Hammer?

  But it doesn't matter because you fuck yourself in the next month, in the previous month.

• 42:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, I, it's just sometimes I do really great and then sometimes it falls off the wagon.

• 42:32Caleb Hammer?

  Just because you get no dick doesn't mean you need to fuck yourself to feel something.

• 42:38Caleb Hammer?

  But that's what you're doing every other month at a minimum. A budget is not working if you only sometimes follow it.

• 42:45Speaker 03

  Okay, okay. But from now on, I'll-

• 42:49Caleb Hammer?

  That's not an argument. I can't listen to that. I can't listen to that. Just stop saying that. Because that is a pointless thing to stop. Because you know what that is? That is a brushing criticism to the side. That's all that is. That is an answer because you don't want the pushback anymore. But it's not an answer that anyone can listen to, including yourself. I will believe it if and when you do it and I can see it. Until then, you cannot just say, "I'll do it." Because that is not anything. That is not anything. What?

• 43:17Speaker 03

  Some things I have paid off.

• 43:19Caleb Hammer?

  This went from $75 to $3,503.

• 43:22Speaker 03

  It's, yeah.

• 43:23Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the fuck up.

• 43:24Speaker 03

  Okay, okay.

• 43:24Caleb Hammer?

  You're already talking about going into over 100,000 hours of debt.

• 43:28Speaker 03

  But I won't do it. I won't do it until it's paid off.

• 43:31Caleb Hammer?

  No, I'm an additional debt, you actual moron. Yeah, Google your way through that. That's the only way you're gonna survive.

• 43:39Speaker 03

  Okay, fine.

• 43:41Caleb Hammer?

  I didn't say it was in addition to this, which by the way, you're never gonna pay this off based on your behavior. 2,000 hours, moron, a monthly basis spent. Good luck.

• 43:48Speaker 05

  The number one YouTube membership just got upgraded. And for this month only, you can join for free. See exclusive shows every day, Monday through Saturday. Financial Audit Post Shows, exclusive and uncensored Financial Audit episodes.

• 44:06Caleb Hammer?

  Obviously, your time's 100%, but-

• 44:10Speaker 05

  Including fan favorites, Audit Update.

• 44:14Speaker 06

  Therapist now? Wait.

• 44:16Speaker 04

  You're dating a therapist?

• 44:17Speaker 06

  Personally or romantically or both?

• 44:19Speaker 05

  Audit breakdown.

• 44:20Caleb Hammer?

  And we still don't with people like that. Like he is at this level.

• 44:23Speaker 05

  And hammer it out.

• 44:26Caleb Hammer?

  Discipline into your budget. That's what I was.

• 44:28Speaker 05

  Plus you'll get access to Hammer Elite Day on January 31st. No other channel offers what Hammer Elite provides. Join with the link in the pinned comment or description below. Submit proof of purchase at hammerelite.com and we'll reimburse you for your first month with a $10 digital gift card that can be spent anywhere in most countries. Sorry, North Korea. This isn't for you.

• 44:51Caleb Hammer?

  This is how we have to do a free trial on here because the platform doesn't currently offer free trials.

• 44:56Speaker 05

  It's okay.

• 44:56Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 44:57Speaker 05

  It's worth it.

• 44:58Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, it is.

• 44:59Speaker 05

  Join Hammer Elite, the best membership on YouTube today.

• 45:03Speaker 01

  Cheers to fall savings at Whole Foods Market, home of higher ingredient standards. This Halloween, share chocolates and candies made without that spooky high fructose corn syrup. Throwing a party? Make it easy with a berry chantilly cake. Ready to cook pizza? No antibiotics ever chicken wings. And sushi made fresh daily. Fall gatherings never tasted better. Save through November 3rd at Whole Foods Market.

• 45:30Speaker 05

  For free.

• 45:33Caleb Hammer?

  Starbucks is bullsh** and a waste of money. And you already know that by making your coffee at home and investing the rest. So now you need to do that with your energy drink as well. Make Gamer Subs at home for just 40 cents a serving. And honestly, it literally tastes better. And we proved this accidentally via a blind taste test in our Hammer Elite show, Fat and Fatter. The number one ranked energy drink is Gamer Subs. Literally, the cherry flavor is insane. Listen, you can also get free samples to see if you like it or 10% off your order at gamersubs.gg or click that link in the description below, type in code CALEB.

• 46:13Speaker 03

  But see, when I do my budget, right? I know there is extra money there. Sometimes. But where is it?

• 46:20Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 46:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, you know, like, okay, I bring in 5,000, my mortgage is 2, my bills are 1,000. So then the rest of it, I don't know. So if I can figure out where the rest of it is.

• 46:31Caleb Hammer?

  That's what doing a budget is for. You should be able to see it, you moron.

• 46:37Caleb Hammer?

  All right, please go through Master Your Money. Listen.

• 46:39Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 46:39Caleb Hammer?

  Listen, tens of thousands of people have taken our classes. Just do it. You guys can sign up for Master Your Money. Join the community. It's incredible. Check that out, CalebHammer.com. But also, just like, what are you doing? You actually have to take it. I can't just hold your hand through it. I can't force you to do it. You have to do that on your own. And I can't listen to someone who just says, "I'll do it." Show it, prove it, come back.

• 47:02Speaker 03

  Okay, okay.

• 47:03Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, late fees, like crazy. Now that 35,000, 3500s at a 27% interest rate, death!

• 47:11Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my.

• 47:14Speaker 03

  Sorry.

• 47:15Caleb Hammer?

  Do you smoke?

• 47:16Speaker 03

  No.

• 47:17Caleb Hammer?

  Good. Thank.

• 47:20Caleb Hammer?

  Because every single person, do you vape?

• 47:22Speaker 03

  No.

• 47:23Caleb Hammer?

  Usually this bad behavior translates.

• 47:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, see, all natural. All natural bad behavior.

• 47:32Caleb Hammer?

  City Strava, what's going on? Strata?

• 47:34Speaker 03

  Um, yeah, that's, that's big.

• 47:38Caleb Hammer?

  Wow, what a detailed description.

• 47:40Speaker 03

  I don't know, I just use that one when I'm like, oh, I, you know, need to spend money, but I don't want, you know, some need is whatever. Where, the card needs to be swiped.

• 47:52Caleb Hammer?

  The difference between needs and wants, maybe that would actually be beneficial to you and you wouldn't be [__] in every way whatsoever.

• 47:58Speaker 03

  So the card needs to be swiped, but I don't want it to come out of my bank account, so it goes there.

• 48:03Caleb Hammer?

  And how is that penny fitting you? You know, that also means it's this money you don't have. If you can't afford to put it in your checking account, it means you can't afford to put it on a credit card.

• 48:12Speaker 03

  I don't want it to go on my checking account.

• 48:14Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, you told me that after your mortgage payment, you struggled to see if you can even have enough money to make it to the next paycheck. So what the [__]? So it's not just you don't want it in your checking account, you can't. But regardless, yeah, no shit, because it's $416.83 spent last month after only making the minimum payment, while $125.43 of interest accrued. So this went up by $300, essentially. You [__] what is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? Why are you spending so much on a card that you cannot pay off that is accruing so much in interest? You [__] why?

• 48:45Speaker 03

  Hmm, it has to. Things have to get paid.

• 48:49Caleb Hammer?

  Have to, have to, have to.

• 48:53Speaker 03

  Strongly.

• 48:53Caleb Hammer?

  Going to California, have to.

• 48:55Speaker 03

  It's already done.

• 48:57Caleb Hammer?

  No shit, but you're saying have to.

• 48:59Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 48:59Caleb Hammer?

  Also, you'll spend more money when you're there, so I'd cancel it anyway. But 16 years, 16 years to pay this off if you do not purchase, which you're incapable of, and if you make, and if you only make your minimum payments, which so far, at least that's what you did. But we already know from the last credit card, you missed two this year. Let's see from this card.

• 49:18Caleb Hammer?

  From this card, okay, you didn't miss anything this year, but you've had almost a thousand hours in interest. By year's end, it'll be a thousand hours in interest.

• 49:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's a lot.

• 49:26Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, that's a lot. So that's the consequences of, oh, we can't put it in our checking account right now. Thousand hours gone, ripped from you, stolen, gone. Done.

• 49:37Speaker 03

  Yeah. They need to lower the interest rates.

• 49:40Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 49:41Speaker 03

  They should lower the interest rates.

• 49:43Caleb Hammer?

  They have with the Fed, following the Fed. It was likely closer to 30, now it's closer to 27. But even still, it's, you're not gonna get a good rate on this card.

• 49:51Speaker 03

  I know.

• 49:52Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so here's our needs, salad and go.

• 49:55Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. Gotta eat dinner.

• 49:57Caleb Hammer?

  You're a mother, yeah, cook.

• 49:59Speaker 03

  They, no, I, I cook when they're there and then I forget to cook when I don't have them. So you'll notice, it's like, I just don't want to.

• 50:08Caleb Hammer?

  How do you forget everything? You forget your budget, you forget your bills, you forget your cards, you forget to cook? What are you capable of?

• 50:15Speaker 03

  I just really don't want to.

• 50:16Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, want, there you go, you don't want to, this isn't want, not a need, I don't wanna hear it. Okay? Creations Mall, going and getting some bullshit. Roadhouse Roadies, Roadhouse Roadies, Roadhouse Roadies. Chick-fil-A, Chick-fil-A, those are our needs?

• 50:35Speaker 03

  Dinner.

• 50:36Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, wants.

• 50:38Speaker 03

  Yeah. I, you know, I, it doesn't seem like that much at the time. Like they're like, you know, $10, $12, and then boom.

• 50:48Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, that is what happens.

• 50:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 50:51Caleb Hammer?

  Why can't you cook for yourself?

• 50:53Speaker 03

  I can, I just don't want to, I'm tired.

• 50:55Caleb Hammer?

  Tired, meal prep, that's what meal prepping's for. You cook a couple of times a week and you warm shit up. Welcome to meal prepping, use our cookbook, use the meal plan in the budget class. Well, that's, it's so, it's, is it the most pleasant, is it always the best? No, but you're sacrificing for this better life that you're trying to get to. That's the whole point. That's why we do it temporarily. And if you know that you do not like to cook when the kids are not there, then there you go. You found your, you found your solution, meal prepping.

• 51:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, but sometimes I, I don't know, you like forget to meal prep. You know, I try to.

• 51:32Caleb Hammer?

  Forget again? What is wrong with you in forgetting? Everything is forgetting. Are you capable of anything? What is wrong with you? Well, you don't forget when your kids are there.

• 51:40Speaker 03

  Right.

• 51:40Caleb Hammer?

  So you shouldn't be, you should be able to replicate that when they're not there.

• 51:46Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 51:47Speaker 03

  I don't know, I just don't, I, why?

• 51:51Caleb Hammer?

  Why what?

• 51:52Speaker 03

  I don't, I don't want to, I don't want to meal prep on Sunday. I just want to do nothing.

• 51:58Speaker 03

  And then that means you also have to do it like on Wednesday or Thursday.

• 52:02Caleb Hammer?

  Listen, I'm not saying you can't go out to eat at all, but the fact is you're spending all this money that you do not have while you have bad debt, while spending $2,000 more than you make on a monthly basis, while not having enough money to make it from your mortgage payment to your next whatever by paycheck. Like it's this, eating out doesn't fit in there. Also, you're trying to get fake tits to improve your looks, yet you go and you get fast food?

• 52:23Speaker 03

  Salad and go is healthy for you and so is Chick-fil-A because I get those.

• 52:26Caleb Hammer?

  Sure, but you're already dangling. Like if you want to get fake tits to like, bring in the dick, you know? Lose this, I gotta do it too. That's why I can say it. We can touch, we can touch danglies if you want.

• 52:39Speaker 03

  That could be genetic too, by the way.

• 52:40Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, yeah, but you can also like, probably cheaper than fake tits. But either way, it doesn't matter. I'm not like ripping on you for it, but if, if all our money's going to attract penis.

• 52:51Speaker 03

  It's not for that.

• 52:53Caleb Hammer?

  You just said you want to go around and be like, hey, want to see my tits to everyone? That's what you said. That's what you said.

• 52:58Speaker 03

  Okay. But I like them too.

• 53:00Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, I'd hope it's also for you and not just other people. That'd be really sad if it was just for you.

• 53:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, I want them.

• 53:06Caleb Hammer?

  Sure, but you seem to want Chick-fil-A and salad to go and Roadhouse Roadies more.

• 53:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was just a movie.

• 53:12Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 53:13Speaker 03

  I think that was just a movie.

• 53:14Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, three times?

• 53:15Speaker 03

  Oh, maybe that was drinks. Okay, okay.

• 53:17Caleb Hammer?

  It's a bar, dude.

• 53:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:18Caleb Hammer?

  It's a bar, you tit. What is wrong with you?

• 53:20Speaker 03

  It's a bar.

• 53:21Caleb Hammer?

  You're so you're trying to get laid. You going out there drinking it up?

• 53:24Speaker 03

  No. I mean, yes, I like to drink, but I don't. Not have people at Roadies.

• 53:29Caleb Hammer?

  Well, how do you get them then?

• 53:30Speaker 03

  I don't.

• 53:31Caleb Hammer?

  You're not on the prowl?

• 53:32Speaker 03

  No.

• 53:33Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, get on the prowl before, you know.

• 53:37Caleb Hammer?

  Like, you're already in the desert.

• 53:39Speaker 03

  You've said it's Tucson. I don't know.

• 53:41Caleb Hammer?

  No, but you're already in the desert. You're gonna be drier.

• 53:44Speaker 03

  I might not be technically single, you know?

• 53:47Caleb Hammer?

  Does it impact you?

• 53:48Speaker 03

  But I just don't want, I just don't. The dating scene in Tucson is not, not it. So I'm thinking maybe outside of Tucson, you know, but that's later. That's later. That's next chapter.

• 53:58Caleb Hammer?

  Pause. Hammer Elite is for you right now, but you gotta submit proof of purchase at hammerelite.com so you can get your $10 digital gift card that covers it.

• 54:10Caleb Hammer?

  Next chapter. When's next chapter? It sounds like your 10 chapters. Yeah, but your next chapter is going into 100,000 hours of death for your next chapter. So what are you talking about?

• 54:18Speaker 03

  Well, maybe I won't.

• 54:18Caleb Hammer?

  I hope you won't.

• 54:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 54:20Caleb Hammer?

  That would be walking away, learning something, but we'll see. Oh, well, you hooked up with someone in Vegas, I'm being told.

• 54:26Speaker 03

  That was fun.

• 54:27Caleb Hammer?

  There you go.

• 54:27Speaker 03

  Salavi.

• 54:28Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 54:29Speaker 03

  It happens.

• 54:30Caleb Hammer?

  Salavi?

• 54:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, it just, it just, you know, it was what it was. I actually wasn't.

• 54:34Caleb Hammer?

  Was it a stripper?

• 54:35Speaker 03

  No, no, it was right before we went to Vegas. No, I don't think that would be fun, actually.

• 54:39Caleb Hammer?

  How'd you find this guy?

• 54:40Speaker 03

  He was a friend of a friend.

• 54:42Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, that gets messy. See, that's why randos are better.

• 54:45Speaker 03

  It got a little messy, but that's okay. It was what it was. Um, you know, like when you're in the friend group, then you don't realize like someone likes him and then, you know, you got feelings hurt.

• 54:54Caleb Hammer?

  And he made a move on you? You made a move on him?

• 54:57Speaker 03

  No, he made a move on me.

• 55:00Speaker 03

  But guys, dude.

• 55:04Caleb Hammer?

  Are you surprised?

• 55:05Speaker 03

  No, I don't know. I don't know. It just happened. Like, I literally told myself, like, he's not coming inside. And then he came inside and I was like, well, fuck it.

• 55:12Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 55:14Caleb Hammer?

  Bro, what are you talking about, man? Wait, whoa, wait, what? Whoa, whoa, repeat that? I was reading something. He said, please, you said, please do not come inside of me?

• 55:22Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. No, when he, because I needed a ride home.

• 55:26Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 55:27Speaker 03

  Right? And on the drive home, I'm like, he, I was telling myself, he's not coming inside. Right? He's not. He's not gonna, inside my house, inside my house.

• 55:35Caleb Hammer?

  Oh!

• 55:35Speaker 03

  Inside my-

• 55:36Caleb Hammer?

  Hold on. Okay.

• 55:39Speaker 03

  Like, we are not hooking up. I'm not gonna hook up with someone I just met today.

• 55:42Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 55:43Speaker 03

  Right? That's not gonna happen. And then, we're on the front porch and it happened. Not on the front porch, but we were on the-

• 55:50Caleb Hammer?

  Girl, you gotta use your words, dude. In a more intentional way.

• 55:53Speaker 03

  And I was like, you know what? It really has been a minute. Like, why not YOLO?

• 55:57Caleb Hammer?

  There is nothing wrong with having sex.

• 55:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, I know. So then he gave-

• 56:00Caleb Hammer?

  But messy and friends.

• 56:02Speaker 03

  I don't know. I didn't know until the next day, so. I-

• 56:05Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 56:05Speaker 03

  I didn't know that my other friends-

• 56:07Caleb Hammer?

  That you were having sex until the next day?

• 56:09Speaker 03

  No, I didn't know that my other friends liked him until the next day.

• 56:11Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, I didn't even know that. What the, you just shouldn't be having sex with friends. I mean, this is a good general rule to follow, by the way.

• 56:17Speaker 03

  Now we're not friends and it's okay.

• 56:18Caleb Hammer?

  Well, because of this, probably.

• 56:20Speaker 03

  Hmm, yeah.

• 56:21Caleb Hammer?

  Was he wrapped?

• 56:22Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 56:25Speaker 03

  Yes, I'm pretty, yes, yes. We didn't have-

• 56:28Caleb Hammer?

  Hold on, what?

• 56:28Speaker 03

  Yes!

• 56:29Caleb Hammer?

  You're pretty sure?

• 56:30Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 56:30Caleb Hammer?

  Hold on, you just can't, you were walking it back for a second.

• 56:33Speaker 03

  No, no, no, yes.

• 56:34Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. Last 10 minutes of this conversation was for you, uh, kiddos out there watching your mom here.

• 56:39Speaker 03

  They're not watching.

• 56:40Caleb Hammer?

  No way they're not gonna watch this. You're older kids.

• 56:45Caleb Hammer?

  Her mom on like the top 10 podcasts on, in the internet? There's no way they're not watching this.

• 56:51Speaker 03

  We'll see what happens.

• 56:52Caleb Hammer?

  Millions of people are learning that you don't even know if your friend wore a condom.

• 56:56Speaker 03

  Yes, for sure, yes.

• 56:57Caleb Hammer?

  Which I love, by the way. I love that. What a show.

• 57:01Speaker 03

  And see, maybe that's why it doesn't happen very often.

• 57:03Caleb Hammer?

  Why?

• 57:04Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 57:05Caleb Hammer?

  Make him wear a condom, take some dick, dude.

• 57:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 57:07Caleb Hammer?

  Listen, if, maybe if you were more focused on taking dick, you wouldn't be going out and blowing all your money on bullshit.

• 57:11Speaker 03

  The hard part, though, is like, I can't just do random hookups. Like, I don't know you.

• 57:17Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you can.

• 57:17Speaker 03

  You can't let a stranger into my house. And I am not going to a stranger's house. So what do you do? That's it.

• 57:25Caleb Hammer?

  No, you meet at a bar first and then you, okay, okay.

• 57:28Speaker 03

  But like you just met them. You're gonna let some random person in your house.

• 57:31Caleb Hammer?

  I've had my fun. Let's move on. American furniture. Great. Okay. So I thought the 10,000 went to furniture, but look, we're getting furniture cards. So it was more than that, huh?

• 57:41Speaker 03

  I had nothing. I had no furniture, no nothing. And so I needed furniture.

• 57:44Caleb Hammer?

  First of all, why? How did you not have furniture in your other place that you came from?

• 57:48Speaker 03

  Hmm, because...

• 57:49Caleb Hammer?

  You're with your dad, but you probably still had some.

• 57:51Speaker 03

  No.

• 57:51Caleb Hammer?

  How long were you with your dad? Since forever?

• 57:53Speaker 03

  Uh, yeah. So when I, okay, so I, when I was still married, we had my apartment. And then we moved into, right before we separated, like a few weeks before we separated, we moved into his brother's house that was already furnished. So I didn't take any of my stuff, like any of my furniture. I like gave it all away.

• 58:16Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 58:17Speaker 03

  And then when I left, I just took...

• 58:19Caleb Hammer?

  Well, this is interest free for now with a $73.68 minimum payment. I think it's interest free. We'll see. You make your minimum payments only. It takes five years, the, the way you're going if you don't purchase, by the way, which...

• 58:29Speaker 03

  I actually need to pay that off like ASAP.

• 58:31Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I was having a feeling, but we'll probably get to that on the next page. Balance $1,966.06.

• 58:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:38Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, please don't be deferred. Let's see. Lots of fees this year so far, by the way. Why? $111 of fees. I don't know if those are late fees or what.

• 58:46Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, they might be.

• 58:47Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, hundreds of dollars, hundreds of dollars in deferred interest. Oh!

• 58:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:51Caleb Hammer?

  In like a couple of months. Oh, you're done.

• 58:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

• 58:57Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 58:59Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 59:00Caleb Hammer?

  Why did you do this to yourself? Did you have to make...

• 59:04Speaker 03

  It's because I had another card that had deferred interest that needed to get paid off first. So I put all my payments on there.

• 59:12Caleb Hammer?

  You have to pay a thousand dollars a month to pay this off in time. You spend two thousand more than you make. Good the fuck.

• 59:20Speaker 03

  But if I don't spend the money more than I make, the money will.

• 59:23Caleb Hammer?

  Sure, if you don't do this hypothetical thing that you've been incapable of, then it works. Shut the fuck up. That's not how this works. Like, sure, I hope you implement correct behavior from here. Nothing is suggested that you would do, you would do so.

• 59:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, I don't know what to do on that one.

• 59:37Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, a thousand dollars a month for the next two months, or else if hundreds being added in interest.

• 59:43Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, I know.

• 59:46Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, at fifteen point eight percent. What is this, twelve thousand, three hundred thirty dollars and fifty nine cents? That is a massive balance, you. What is going on?

• 59:57Speaker 03

  So, once upon a time, I had credit card debt.

• 1:00:01Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, good. Please don't tell me you consolidated. Consolidation is not a bad thing. I want to be clear. Personal loans are not bad. Student loans are not bad. Consolidations are not bad. Bankruptcy? But I can get it as a last resort. It is bad if you don't fix your fucking behavior.

• 1:00:16Speaker 03

  I was, I know. Yeah.

• 1:00:17Caleb Hammer?

  Look where we are.

• 1:00:19Speaker 03

  But that one is fifteen percent compared, like, my logic was.

• 1:00:22Caleb Hammer?

  No, doesn't matter because you have racked up your credit cards again. So you doubled your debt from where it was. Doesn't matter what the interest rate is compared to the interest rate.

• 1:00:30Speaker 03

  But when that thing is.

• 1:00:31Caleb Hammer?

  Change your behavior, you come double.

• 1:00:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, but when that's done paid off, then I don't have that payment anymore.

• 1:00:37Caleb Hammer?

  When the debt is done paid off, you don't have the payment anymore.

• 1:00:40Speaker 03

  It's a monthly payment for like five years or three years.

• 1:00:43Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, that is how a debt works. Once it is paid off, you do not have a payment.

• 1:00:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:47Caleb Hammer?

  Did you just, did you seriously just tell me that?

• 1:00:50Speaker 03

  But yeah.

• 1:00:50Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness, woman. How have you made it this far in life?

• 1:00:53Speaker 03

  Be paid off in three years.

• 1:00:55Caleb Hammer?

  The dumb ones that have the most amount of children. What is happening?

• 1:00:58Speaker 03

  So sure.

• 1:00:59Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 1:01:00Speaker 03

  But listen, when that has like a set time to be paid off.

• 1:01:04Caleb Hammer?

  You sure we can't send you back to school with the eleven year old? When the debt is paid off, there's no more payments.

• 1:01:11Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:01:12Caleb Hammer?

  That's what happened. That's what happens. I get it. We're doing the minimum. Yes, the minimum payment is same with the car that you paid off, same with the credit cards. When it is done, it's done.

• 1:01:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:01:22Caleb Hammer?

  What are you saying then? Is there something else you're trying to say that maybe I'm not picking up? Maybe I'm the here. Let's find out.

• 1:01:28Speaker 03

  Well, so that monthly payment is like four hundred and fifty, and in three years, it's twelve thousand dollars that I paid off. And then that's debt that's paid off.

• 1:01:41Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, that's how minimum monthly payments work.

• 1:01:46Speaker 03

  Okay. Yeah.

• 1:01:48Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my goodness.

• 1:01:52Speaker 03

  But it's three years.

• 1:01:52Caleb Hammer?

  Do you tell yourself that every night?

• 1:01:54Speaker 03

  No, just once a month when I look at it.

• 1:01:58Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you're gonna be forty one, you tit. You tit, your small tit?

• 1:02:02Speaker 03

  It's fine, it's fine.

• 1:02:03Caleb Hammer?

  Get it? Cause you're flat?

• 1:02:05Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:02:05Caleb Hammer?

  Which we love the flat naturals, by the way. Don't hate yourself for that.

• 1:02:08Speaker 03

  I, I don't.

• 1:02:09Caleb Hammer?

  Good. Good. You don't need to make them feel all not great.

• 1:02:15Caleb Hammer?

  Gosh.

• 1:02:15Speaker 03

  You know what? They might not even happen. I've been wanting it to happen for twenty years and it might not happen.

• 1:02:19Caleb Hammer?

  Every time I've touched a fake tit, I've been very disappointed. I'm like, please.

• 1:02:22Speaker 03

  How do you know? Do you ask them, like, are your tits fake?

• 1:02:24Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, touch a fake tit, you know it's fake. It's as clear as that. If you never touched a fake tit.

• 1:02:30Speaker 03

  I don't know. No, yes, I have. Yes, I have.

• 1:02:33Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, exactly. Women touch each other's tits all the time.

• 1:02:37Speaker 03

  Honestly, I like them both ways.

• 1:02:38Caleb Hammer?

  Well, it looks like it's a four hundred sixty one dollar, which is chunky, by the way. Four hundred sixty one dollars, sixty cent monthly payment.

• 1:02:43Speaker 03

  It's because I wanted to pay it off in three years.

• 1:02:45Caleb Hammer?

  Wait, this is the second time you did a Lending Club loan?

• 1:02:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:02:48Caleb Hammer?

  What the?

• 1:02:49Speaker 03

  I don't know. It, so the first time.

• 1:02:54Speaker 03

  Maybe third time's the charm. Second time's the charm.

• 1:02:57Caleb Hammer?

  You're not doing it again.

• 1:02:58Speaker 03

  No, I'm not gonna do it again.

• 1:02:59Caleb Hammer?

  So no third time's the charm? What are you talking about? Or is this the third?

• 1:03:02Speaker 03

  No, that's the second one.

• 1:03:03Caleb Hammer?

  What was the first one?

• 1:03:04Speaker 03

  The first one. The first one, I don't know.

• 1:03:06Caleb Hammer?

  It wasn't?

• 1:03:07Speaker 03

  A long time ago.

• 1:03:07Caleb Hammer?

  You don't even remember what it was for?

• 1:03:09Speaker 03

  The same thing.

• 1:03:10Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, so you're never learning your, you're never making progress.

• 1:03:13Speaker 03

  Sometimes life happens.

• 1:03:15Caleb Hammer?

  Life happens. These are your choices. This is not life. That, dude, a trip to California was not life happens. That was not an emergency. There wasn't a.

• 1:03:23Speaker 00

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• 1:03:48Caleb Hammer?

  And relative to go see, what are you talking about? Where are you going in California?

• 1:03:53Speaker 03

  A little fun.

• 1:03:54Caleb Hammer?

  A little fun, little fun. You're talking $900, a little fun is maybe you go to the park.

• 1:03:59Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:04:00Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, that's a little fun, a little fun. You a little fun going to the movie, seeing the new Avatar. And oh my goodness, the new Firewoman. Oh, I am gooning and she's flat as well. And I would stick it in an alien for the first time in my life. Yeah.

• 1:04:14Speaker 04

  You what?

• 1:04:15Speaker 03

  Okay. I want to go see Avatar.

• 1:04:18Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I will allow that little fun.

• 1:04:20Speaker 03

  Okay, okay.

• 1:04:21Caleb Hammer?

  And she could crush me and I would love it. My goodness, what's her name?

• 1:04:26Caleb Hammer?

  Avatar, Fire and Ash. She could do whatever she wants to me.

• 1:04:32Caleb Hammer?

  Vareen.

• 1:04:34Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:04:35Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, played by Ona Chaplin.

• 1:04:39Speaker 03

  Huh.

• 1:04:39Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 1:04:42Caleb Hammer?

  Well, one year older than you.

• 1:04:44Speaker 03

  Hey.

• 1:04:45Caleb Hammer?

  Same, it still works.

• 1:04:46Speaker 03

  That's fair, that's fair.

• 1:04:47Caleb Hammer?

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• 1:05:29Caleb Hammer?

  These are called affiliates and you get that sweet, sweet cash for signing up for some amazing products. The first one is Chime. This is a checking account that I personally use and you get up to a $350 bonus with a new Chime checking account and earn up to 3.5% APY on your savings. And second, my investing app of choice these days is Weebull and get a 2% match on all of your money that you transfer over. And finally, sign up for automated investing with Acorns. Typically, the signup bonus is only five bucks, but with my link, you get $20. Ladies and gents, you get money, I get money. Enjoy, links are in the description below. Okay. Wow, 12% payoff, well done. Freedom card, what's going on?

• 1:06:10Speaker 03

  I know if he's on that one.

• 1:06:13Speaker 03

  That one, some of, most of it went on to the loan, right?

• 1:06:19Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, then you built back up, shocker. Who would've thought? Six hundred eight dollars, eighty-nine cents with the forty dollar minimum payment. Purchasing a hundred twenty-one dollars while only making the minimum payment. Will accruing twelve dollars and seventy-two cents of interest. Nineteen months to pay off. What is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? You consolidated this and you built it up to hundreds of dollars and takes-

• 1:06:35Speaker 03

  I forget that it was connected to Amazon.

• 1:06:36Caleb Hammer?

  You forget everything. I forget everything. You forget everything. Fuck you, delete Ms. Unfuck, pull up your Amazon.

• 1:06:41Speaker 03

  Okay, I, I will, but to be fair, some, some of this is not paid on my card. Some of it-

• 1:06:48Caleb Hammer?

  Well, when I call it out and it wasn't, tell me.

• 1:06:51Speaker 03

  Okay. If it's like work stuff, that's obviously paid on my work card.

• 1:06:56Speaker 03

  And if it's coffee, that's my dad on his-

• 1:06:57Caleb Hammer?

  Pull up your Amazon!

• 1:07:00Speaker 03

  Please hold, please hold. Here you go.

• 1:07:02Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, it's Amazon, Amazon. Five hundred dollars in interest this year so far.

• 1:07:07Caleb Hammer?

  Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay.

• 1:07:11Caleb Hammer?

  What was this bullshit?

• 1:07:12Speaker 03

  See, some of it, my dad doesn't know how to use Amazon, so I put his card on there and he asked me to buy stuff for him.

• 1:07:17Caleb Hammer?

  Is this a, make it, make it feel like you're having contraptions machine?

• 1:07:21Speaker 03

  I don't know, that's for his girlfriend. I don't know. I think it's a blood pressure thing, I don't know.

• 1:07:25Caleb Hammer?

  Nitro elixir, poor hormone.

• 1:07:29Speaker 03

  That is my son's Christmas gift. He wanted cologne.

• 1:07:34Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, military model plan, assuming that's also for them. Professional resistance machine. Lash is probably you. I don't think that's for your son.

• 1:07:43Speaker 03

  That's my friend's Christmas. That was mine and I didn't pay for that.

• 1:07:46Caleb Hammer?

  The housemaid's secret.

• 1:07:48Speaker 03

  Oh, that's my secret-

• 1:07:49Caleb Hammer?

  One of those Goon books?

• 1:07:49Speaker 03

  No, no, no, it's my secret Santa. All of that stuff, like the earrings and the bookmark. I did like a cute little secret Santa.

• 1:07:55Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, cute little secret Santa that you can't afford. Well done. Doesn't make it good. Counter-tap ice maker, fuck you.

• 1:08:01Speaker 03

  Oh, see, that was paid with-

• 1:08:03Caleb Hammer?

  Doesn't matter.

• 1:08:04Speaker 03

  I didn't pay for that. It was paid with a company card.

• 1:08:06Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, wire hooks, acrylic pens, Christmas tree skirt.

• 1:08:11Speaker 03

  That's all work.

• 1:08:11Caleb Hammer?

  Spoon rests, stove top, chunky cotton net. You got a Kendra Scott bullshit.

• 1:08:17Speaker 03

  Christmas.

• 1:08:18Caleb Hammer?

  Windshield cover, fuck you, doesn't matter, Christmas. Doesn't all of a sudden make it affordable, by the way. It really doesn't. I do not understand that logic. Knit and stockings, you got some caramel, French vanilla pump shit, uh, coffee pump shit.

• 1:08:34Caleb Hammer?

  Now lots of markers. You got a black double line, basic body, something you got a skirt for women, a crown.

• 1:08:41Speaker 03

  Halloween, Halloween.

• 1:08:42Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my gosh, it doesn't matter though. That doesn't make it affordable. A holiday does not make it affordable.

• 1:08:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, but I can't just say like you can't have a Halloween costume.

• 1:08:52Caleb Hammer?

  Your kids are actually old enough where, okay, Halloween, you might be able to do some like, uh, some makeshift shit. But first of all, two, your kids are old enough to work, to be very clear, and get their own shit if they want to. Two, when it comes to Christmas, your kids, maybe other than the 11 year old, but even then, are Secret Santa, that, you don't have to do that. Should put your kids alone. You can sit down and be like, yo, can't really afford as much this year. We'll try to do as much as we can. We'll double off Christmas next year. It'll be great. Mama gotta work. Okay?

• 1:09:19Speaker 03

  Cam.

• 1:09:20Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, she 17 year old, whoops. Messed up my life.

• 1:09:24Speaker 03

  God forbid.

• 1:09:25Caleb Hammer?

  Can't keep, I hate hooking up, but yet I go marry men that I have to divorce every second of our lives. So clearly we're doing men right. It's like, yeah.

• 1:09:34Speaker 03

  But he, listen, their dad makes a lot of money sometimes, a lot of times.

• 1:09:38Caleb Hammer?

  For him, that's him and not you.

• 1:09:39Speaker 03

  I can't have him get them like expensive gifts and then I'm over here like, here's your $10 Target gift. You know, like it's not.

• 1:09:47Caleb Hammer?

  You can, cause you have an adult conversation with them as two of them are practically adults, 17 year olds about to be, and one is two years into adulthood, so.

• 1:09:54Speaker 03

  Well, him, I only got him one cologne.

• 1:09:56Caleb Hammer?

  Well, there you go. See, it's working. You can have a conversation, but that all of a sudden doesn't mean you need to do Secret Santa either.

• 1:10:00Speaker 03

  I mean, I, yeah.

• 1:10:01Caleb Hammer?

  Shut the fuck up. Late $40 monthly payment, balance $1,235.15, four years to pay off, interest accruing, purchasing, absolute stupidity across the board as always. What are you doing? What is up with this card?

• 1:10:15Speaker 03

  Uh.

• 1:10:16Caleb Hammer?

  What are you doing?

• 1:10:20Speaker 03

  That one too. I'm like, what did I?

• 1:10:22Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you?

• 1:10:23Speaker 03

  I don't know. I've had that card a very long time.

• 1:10:26Caleb Hammer?

  You don't even know?

• 1:10:28Speaker 03

  Sometime, you know, you just spend it and go, spend it and go.

• 1:10:31Caleb Hammer?

  What is Pinkberry?

• 1:10:33Speaker 03

  Oh, that's frozen yogurt.

• 1:10:35Caleb Hammer?

  Die. Just what is wrong with you?

• 1:10:37Speaker 03

  It wasn't even for me.

• 1:10:38Caleb Hammer?

  How is that more important than your kids? How is that more important than everything you're doing? Your mortgage, your emergency fund, your security. You've had a late fee this year so far. You're gonna have a thousand hours in interest this year with this card. What is wrong with you? You don't give a shit. You don't give a shit.

• 1:10:53Speaker 03

  I do, I do.

• 1:10:53Caleb Hammer?

  Divorced the first one because he's bad with finances? Fuck you. And now you said he's making more money.

• 1:10:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:10:59Caleb Hammer?

  It's like, what? Okay. Double cash, what's going on? You're certainly not reaping the rewards.

• 1:11:05Speaker 03

  Uh, that one I just let my son use.

• 1:11:07Caleb Hammer?

  Why? He is using it!

• 1:11:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:11:10Caleb Hammer?

  Why? Does it just cruise you, moron?

• 1:11:13Speaker 03

  Be- uh, he needs like gas-

• 1:11:15Caleb Hammer?

  Which kid?

• 1:11:16Speaker 03

  The seventeen year old. Because he drives the kids to school.

• 1:11:18Caleb Hammer?

  Seventeen year old, good, call him.

• 1:11:20Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:11:20Caleb Hammer?

  Call him.

• 1:11:21Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:11:21Caleb Hammer?

  Yes. I'm telling him, he is not using this anymore.

• 1:11:24Speaker 03

  But it's because he doesn't have Apple Pay-

• 1:11:26Caleb Hammer?

  Call him.

• 1:11:26Speaker 03

  And I can't transfer him money.

• 1:11:27Caleb Hammer?

  Call him. Yes. Call him! I'm telling him, he cannot use this anymore. Mama's broke.

• 1:11:33Speaker 03

  Okay, okay.

• 1:11:34Caleb Hammer?

  Call him.

• 1:11:35Speaker 03

  I'll tell him.

• 1:11:35Caleb Hammer?

  Call him.

• 1:11:36Speaker 03

  I'll tell him.

• 1:11:37Caleb Hammer?

  Call him. What is wrong with you?

• 1:11:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, but here's the thing.

• 1:11:40Caleb Hammer?

  Why can't you call him?

• 1:11:41Speaker 03

  Because he drives the kids to school-

• 1:11:42Caleb Hammer?

  Why can't you call him?

• 1:11:43Speaker 03

  And sometimes he needs gas-

• 1:11:44Caleb Hammer?

  Why can't you call him?

• 1:11:45Speaker 03

  And I can't transfer money to him.

• 1:11:46Caleb Hammer?

  Why can't you call him? Give him cash.

• 1:11:47Speaker 03

  To be, um-

• 1:11:48Caleb Hammer?

  Why can't you call him?

• 1:11:49Speaker 03

  Well, technically, he's in Mexico right now with his dad.

• 1:11:51Caleb Hammer?

  So?

• 1:11:52Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 1:11:53Caleb Hammer?

  Call him.

• 1:11:54Speaker 03

  I hate boundaries.

• 1:11:55Caleb Hammer?

  I don't care! Call him!

• 1:11:57Speaker 03

  You're not my favorite. Okay, okay, we'll call him.

• 1:12:00Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:12:01Speaker 03

  I know, I know.

• 1:12:02Caleb Hammer?

  Minimum payment of twenty dollars, balance two hundred eighty-five dollars, twenty-six cents. I won't swear in front of him, because he's a kid.

• 1:12:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, he's a kid.

• 1:12:08Caleb Hammer?

  Give me the phone, you-

• 1:12:11Speaker 03

  See if he'll answer.

• 1:12:12Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, if you double call him.

• 1:12:14Speaker 03

  But he is in Mexico, so I don't know. Hi, honey.

• 1:12:18Speaker 06

  Hi.

• 1:12:19Caleb Hammer?

  Hey, big guy, you can't spend on the city double cash card anymore, okay? Mama's gonna give you cash.

• 1:12:26Speaker 06

  Wait, what? Oh, is that the guy?

• 1:12:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:12:29Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I am the guy.

• 1:12:31Speaker 06

  Am I on TV right now?

• 1:12:32Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you're on the internet, which is better, but-

• 1:12:35Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 1:12:36Caleb Hammer?

  And I thought a seventeen year old would know that, but- You're kind of talking like you're eighty. That's fine. Listen, here's the thing. You can't spend on the city double cash card, and your mother was broke. She spent it all on frozen yogurt, like a dumb butt.

• 1:12:51Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 1:12:52Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, was that okay?

• 1:12:54Speaker 06

  Uh, yeah.

• 1:12:55Caleb Hammer?

  Cool. Yep. Take cash from her. That's it. Enjoy Mexico. You don't have to stay there. You can come back. We'll allow it.

• 1:13:05Speaker 06

  Alright, thank you.

• 1:13:06Caleb Hammer?

  Alright, love you, bye.

• 1:13:08Speaker 03

  He's such a good kid. I love them so much.

• 1:13:12Caleb Hammer?

  I hope so. Well, he's getting Catalina food, touchdown something, and then some gas. So it's more than just gas.

• 1:13:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:13:21Caleb Hammer?

  It's it.

• 1:13:21Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, he, he does a lot. He takes them to and from school every single day for me and his dad.

• 1:13:26Caleb Hammer?

  I don't care. He's a seventeen year old. I was working at seventeen.

• 1:13:30Speaker 03

  I don't want him to work.

• 1:13:31Caleb Hammer?

  He needs to, what? Why?

• 1:13:33Speaker 03

  Because I want him to go to school.

• 1:13:35Caleb Hammer?

  What? I went to school and worked. Are you stupid? What are you doing? What are you talking about?

• 1:13:38Speaker 03

  I, it's a lot of pressure.

• 1:13:40Caleb Hammer?

  That's what I did.

• 1:13:40Speaker 03

  It's a lot of pressure. He has really good grades. He has good grades.

• 1:13:43Caleb Hammer?

  I've heard, dude, a lot of people do this.

• 1:13:45Speaker 03

  Oh, I don't know. We'll see.

• 1:13:46Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, uh, no, that's a no, by the way.

• 1:13:48Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, his dad wants him to work.

• 1:13:50Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 1:13:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:13:51Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, because it is something good. I'm glad I did. I hated it, and I'm glad I did it.

• 1:13:55Speaker 03

  I don't, yeah, okay.

• 1:13:57Caleb Hammer?

  And learn me to at least work for money.

• 1:13:59Speaker 03

  I know. He, I'm, he actually wants a job.

• 1:14:01Caleb Hammer?

  Maybe I should have gone to school more and started working.

• 1:14:02Speaker 03

  He wants a job, so he probably will get one in the.

• 1:14:04Caleb Hammer?

  He wants one!

• 1:14:05Speaker 03

  Yes, he wants one.

• 1:14:05Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you?

• 1:14:06Speaker 03

  He's applied for them.

• 1:14:09Speaker 03

  It's hard. What am I gonna do when they?

• 1:14:10Caleb Hammer?

  Hard. Everyone except for you wants him to work.

• 1:14:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:14:14Caleb Hammer?

  Including himself.

• 1:14:16Caleb Hammer?

  Stop being helicopter mother. You can't even helicopter your own life.

• 1:14:21Speaker 03

  It's so hard.

• 1:14:22Caleb Hammer?

  Who the fuck are you to hold someone back?

• 1:14:23Speaker 03

  I'm not holding him back.

• 1:14:25Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you're not letting him get a job when he wants to get a job and learn some life skills.

• 1:14:29Speaker 03

  I just want to make sure that his grades stay good in school.

• 1:14:32Caleb Hammer?

  Which if they're not, then you start cracking the whip. Okay?

• 1:14:37Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:14:38Caleb Hammer?

  That doesn't mean hold him back and everyone whatsoever. People work and have good grades.

• 1:14:42Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:14:42Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not saying he's working forty hours a week, dude. Maybe he's picking up literally five hours a week, one half shift, working lunch on a weekend at Jimmy John's or something. You know, something like that. He's earning a little extra cash.

• 1:14:53Speaker 03

  I just didn't want him to go in the direction of like, you know, like sometimes you start working.

• 1:14:58Caleb Hammer?

  A meth addict by working in the back of a kitchen with all?

• 1:15:00Speaker 03

  But sometimes you start working and you realize like, oh, I can make a lot of money right now.

• 1:15:04Caleb Hammer?

  No.

• 1:15:04Speaker 03

  Instead of finishing school.

• 1:15:06Caleb Hammer?

  Cause that's not gonna be a lot of money. No, what, what?

• 1:15:08Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 1:15:08Caleb Hammer?

  Who has that? I've never heard of that.

• 1:15:11Speaker 03

  I mean, that kinda happened with my oldest son. He got into the trade and like you don't need a degree. Yeah, so he did great right away.

• 1:15:18Caleb Hammer?

  What? That's fine. I don't think this guy's gonna get it being a busboy on the weekend.

• 1:15:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, no. Okay.

• 1:15:24Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:15:25Speaker 03

  I just want him to finish school.

• 1:15:27Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, he was he. Wait, did your oldest drop out of high school?

• 1:15:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, he didn't finish.

• 1:15:31Caleb Hammer?

  Well, he's doing okay and it worked.

• 1:15:33Speaker 03

  I know, but it would.

• 1:15:34Caleb Hammer?

  Also, he wants to go into HVAC anyway. He already knows what he wants to do. And I don't think he's gonna pick. Okay.

• 1:15:39Speaker 03

  I know. I know. It'll be fine.

• 1:15:42Caleb Hammer?

  All right, double the love. What is this? Alta, that's right.

• 1:15:48Caleb Hammer?

  It's not working, is it?

• 1:15:50Speaker 03

  I actually don't spend a lot on makeup there.

• 1:15:52Caleb Hammer?

  Right, which is why you owe $2,280.6.

• 1:15:56Speaker 03

  And this one I also paid off. This one I like paid off, paid off, didn't put on that loan. Once upon a time.

• 1:16:00Caleb Hammer?

  Right, but now it's at 3,000 hours, basically $2,280, so.

• 1:16:04Speaker 03

  So my.

• 1:16:05Caleb Hammer?

  Doesn't matter what has been in the past.

• 1:16:07Speaker 03

  I know.

• 1:16:07Caleb Hammer?

  With a $75 minimum payment, you're purchasing $58.62 on this.

• 1:16:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:16:11Caleb Hammer?

  What is wrong with you, mother?

• 1:16:13Speaker 03

  Well, so my youngest, my youngest went into middle school and when you go into middle school, you can have a phone and my, their dad.

• 1:16:21Caleb Hammer?

  They have a phone in middle school? I would never.

• 1:16:23Speaker 03

  Because he takes the bus and like I, you need to know.

• 1:16:26Caleb Hammer?

  I took the bus and I did not have a phone.

• 1:16:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, but things were different.

• 1:16:29Caleb Hammer?

  Hold on, boomer moment. Yes, I know, but I would never.

• 1:16:32Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:16:32Caleb Hammer?

  I do think I would let my kids get a phone until high school and me and my girlfriend, we wanna have kids, maybe in like a year or two. So, you know, I'm already thinking about that. Guess what? They're, they're not watching Coco bullshit, Levin.

• 1:16:45Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no, no. So I just need to know.

• 1:16:47Caleb Hammer?

  For that, I would think, but even still, not having a device of this day and age with all the insane people online.

• 1:16:53Speaker 03

  So he's the youngest, so he might not have, you know, you, the youngest is a little bit.

• 1:16:57Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, that dude is watching.

• 1:16:58Speaker 03

  No, he's not. First of all, he's not. Second of all.

• 1:17:01Caleb Hammer?

  First of all, a sixth grader with a phone, I promise you, as someone who was a sixth grader at one point, that dude is watching. You're giving him free access to the internet?

• 1:17:10Speaker 03

  No, he needs permission. Like he, he has an iPhone, so there are permissions on the phone. Like he can't, it shuts off.

• 1:17:17Caleb Hammer?

  Go on Google Chrome?

• 1:17:18Speaker 03

  He has to ask for permission.

• 1:17:20Caleb Hammer?

  To go on Google Chrome?

• 1:17:21Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 1:17:22Caleb Hammer?

  Or Safari.

• 1:17:24Speaker 03

  I doubt, I doubt he is. He's watching YouTube videos.

• 1:17:28Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my, you don't know what, uh, kids going through puberty do.

• 1:17:35Speaker 03

  Well, I drop him off at the bus stop and so I need to like know because he takes the bus now. Instead of me.

• 1:17:42Caleb Hammer?

  We've all taken the bus.

• 1:17:44Speaker 03

  Okay, but things are different. He's there by himself.

• 1:17:46Caleb Hammer?

  What, things are different? The predators are out more than ever? Like, what are you talking about?

• 1:17:50Speaker 03

  No, because we need to coordinate.

• 1:17:51Caleb Hammer?

  You're the one who picks up seventeen year olds on the road.

• 1:17:52Speaker 03

  Okay, and that's, you listen, we needed to coordinate, okay? I needed to know that his little guy.

• 1:17:58Caleb Hammer?

  What is it, two blocks away?

• 1:17:59Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:18:00Caleb Hammer?

  Where's the bus stop? How far is the bus?

• 1:18:02Speaker 03

  So I dropped him off, like, he's far.

• 1:18:04Caleb Hammer?

  You dropped him off at a bus stop?

• 1:18:05Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:18:06Caleb Hammer?

  He's fine, he's at the bus stop.

• 1:18:08Speaker 03

  Okay, but what happens when I drive away?

• 1:18:11Caleb Hammer?

  What happens when you drive away? He waits for the bus, you moron!

• 1:18:15Speaker 03

  It's on a busy road, someone could get him.

• 1:18:17Caleb Hammer?

  No, you're, you're in a [bleep], you're an AC130 mom. You've elevated, you've upgraded.

• 1:18:23Speaker 03

  No, but anyways, we, he needs to like call his brother and see where he's at when the bus dropped him off. They, all three of them need to coordinate getting off the bus together.

• 1:18:32Caleb Hammer?

  Walkie talkies.

• 1:18:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, okay.

• 1:18:34Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know, all I'm saying is just like, everyone has survived and it's not necessarily the healthy. We know that kids' mental health is absolutely [bleep] devices. Just [bleep] devices. Instagram for women.

• 1:18:48Speaker 03

  He does other things, like he's not just always on his phone. He's not an iPad kid.

• 1:18:51Caleb Hammer?

  Well, it's not just about that, it's literally just so toxic. You can fall into these extremist pipelines.

• 1:18:58Speaker 03

  Okay, anyways.

• 1:18:59Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, your purchase on the, um, yeah, I needed a phone. Yeah, which is why we got, went inside, got some bullshit from the gas station and McDonald's and um, ma- mare is close. La Boca's, forty-eight dollars, twelve cents.

• 1:19:16Speaker 03

  Maybe it's a restaurant.

• 1:19:17Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my [bleep], and then a late fee.

• 1:19:19Speaker 03

  I know.

• 1:19:20Caleb Hammer?

  All because our sixth grader needed a Goon machine. That dude's gonna be a [bleep] predator before.

• 1:19:51Caleb Hammer?

  Or you know it, or like an alt-right school shooter. Who even knows? I would never, I would never, I would never.

• 1:19:59Speaker 03

  You say that until it happens. Like you say that until you actually have a kid in front of you.

• 1:20:03Caleb Hammer?

  My girlfriend's very set on this. She's much more aggressive about it than me. Much more aggressive about it than me.

• 1:20:08Speaker 03

  And see, you have to come to the same page on that, because when you have different parenting, then...

• 1:20:11Caleb Hammer?

  No, I'm allowing it, because I think she's right.

• 1:20:13Speaker 03

  Yeah. It happens and you have like... Well, listen, I don't encourage your kids to watch.

• 1:20:20Caleb Hammer?

  No, but I wouldn't give them the device that encourages them to watch. Okay, 401k loan.

• 1:20:26Speaker 03

  Oh yeah, that happened.

• 1:20:27Caleb Hammer?

  Why?

• 1:20:28Speaker 03

  Okay, so I, I saved money for the house and then I realized that I didn't want to put all my savings in the house down payment. And so I was like, well, you know, I can get like a 401k loan.

• 1:20:38Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, and where is this 401k loan gone?

• 1:20:41Speaker 03

  I'm...

• 1:20:42Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, yeah.

• 1:20:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:44Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh.

• 1:20:45Speaker 03

  Something happened and I needed to spend money. I don't know.

• 1:20:48Caleb Hammer?

  Needed, needed. I don't trust your need.

• 1:20:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, Navy Rewards. This is a stupid, by the way. She owes 10,623. What gets taken from your paycheck to go towards that on a monthly basis?

• 1:20:58Speaker 03

  A hundred dollars.

• 1:20:59Caleb Hammer?

  And what happens if you get fired and it's called due?

• 1:21:01Speaker 03

  I know. Yeah, I thought about that.

• 1:21:03Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, because a hundred dollars ain't gonna make that move very much. You're not taking advantage of the market as much.

• 1:21:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, okay, so someone had told me like, oh, it's a good idea because you pay yourself back interest. Like, that made sense.

• 1:21:13Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but you're still losing to the market.

• 1:21:15Speaker 03

  Wait, so I have a question. So that money that's on the loan is not

• 1:21:22Speaker 03

  in the market? Like, only the money that I pay back? That's wild.

• 1:21:27Caleb Hammer?

  What, that he's busting nuts?

• 1:21:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:21:29Caleb Hammer?

  What are you talking about? This actually blows your mind? They're blowing loads. It blows your mind?

• 1:21:33Speaker 03

  In their room?

• 1:21:35Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, in the shower, down the drain.

• 1:21:39Caleb Hammer?

  There are children being flushed down that drain.

• 1:21:41Speaker 03

  I shower in that shower.

• 1:21:42Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you do.

• 1:21:43Speaker 03

  Even my oldest. Ugh.

• 1:21:45Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, first of all, I extra wanted a fact check, because the answer is no, but I wanted to make sure there was no loophole that you could invest through the market. Leave some of them in, because that was funny. Do you still have a balance on this card? Am I writing this down?

• 1:21:59Speaker 03

  No, no, no.

• 1:21:59Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, okay. Okay, well, you've had like late shit on it.

• 1:22:02Speaker 03

  I know.

• 1:22:03Caleb Hammer?

  JP Penney, fuck is...

• 1:22:05Speaker 03

  That one should be very minimal too.

• 1:22:06Caleb Hammer?

  Well, it is small, so I don't know why you don't just pay it off. You need to close your cards.

• 1:22:10Speaker 03

  I know.

• 1:22:10Caleb Hammer?

  You already have a house. You're gonna stay in this house forever, so you don't need access to credit. Close your accounts. It doesn't matter.

• 1:22:16Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:22:16Caleb Hammer?

  Close your accounts. You cannot be trusted with

• 1:22:18Speaker 03

  These two all close.

• 1:22:19Caleb Hammer?

  No, all.

• 1:22:20Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:22:20Caleb Hammer?

  $193.32. They're all just holding you back. It's a hammer. That is a tool, but you're just swinging back and hitting your face.

• 1:22:26Speaker 03

  Okay, okay.

• 1:22:26Caleb Hammer?

  $30 minimum payment, $193.32 is owed on it. Fees and interest and bullshit. This is so stupid.

• 1:22:33Speaker 03

  I know. This one I kept forgetting to pay, so I put on automatic payments.

• 1:22:37Caleb Hammer?

  A late fee on this with a balance of only $189. I don't even know what this account is.

• 1:22:43Caleb Hammer?

  I don't even know what this has said, even titled. The Smile Generation.

• 1:22:46Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:22:47Caleb Hammer?

  Races?

• 1:22:47Speaker 03

  Yeah. It's almost paid off too.

• 1:22:49Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, except you were late!

• 1:22:51Speaker 03

  I told you, the little ones I forget about.

• 1:22:54Caleb Hammer?

  Well done if you actually budget. Instead of sometimes budgeting like a dumb... $189.40.

• 1:22:59Speaker 03

  It's because I wait for the email to come in and sometimes I have too many emails.

• 1:23:02Caleb Hammer?

  $41. Email? Open the account you've... What is wrong? You're incapable of everything. I don't know how you have survived, how your children have survived. Oh my god, oh my gosh, for credit!

• 1:23:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:13Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, care of credit, $32 minimum payment. What's this for at a balance of $984.63?

• 1:23:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:21Caleb Hammer?

  See, this is what happens when you have endless debt, no emergency fund, everything that has to happen like races or wisdom teeth is new debt!

• 1:23:29Speaker 03

  Yeah. But that's on no interest and it'll get paid off before the interest ends.

• 1:23:33Caleb Hammer?

  I certainly the hope so.

• 1:23:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:36Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, yeah, because deferred interest is accruing like dick. Oh, there's still more! I'm trying to get to the end of this debt!

• 1:23:43Speaker 03

  That's my mortgage. That's my mortgage.

• 1:23:44Caleb Hammer?

  Great. The mortgage that we cannot afford, that we have a negative equity position in the house.

• 1:23:47Speaker 03

  I can.

• 1:23:48Caleb Hammer?

  Nope. You literally just said after you make your mortgage payment, sometimes you don't have enough money to make it to the next month and you cannot afford it. $2,093.36 on a monthly basis. Yes, this is all your fault. Well done. I'm glad you're figuring that out finally.

• 1:24:01Speaker 03

  Because technically I should have $3,000 left over.

• 1:24:05Caleb Hammer?

  Three... No, there's more bills outside of just the mortgage, you moron. $301,799.56.

• 1:24:13Caleb Hammer?

  I hope your extremist child that you've given a phone to doesn't come and mass shoot me after I just called his mother a moron on TV.

• 1:24:21Speaker 03

  I know, he's a very cute kid.

• 1:24:23Caleb Hammer?

  You know this is on YouTube for the rest of

• 1:24:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's fine.

• 1:24:27Caleb Hammer?

  They might watch it at 70.

• 1:24:28Speaker 03

  Okay. No, very cute kids, very well-rounded.

• 1:24:32Caleb Hammer?

  It'll be nice to see for them what their mother looked like before she got slutty fake tits.

• 1:24:36Speaker 03

  They'll remember, they're old enough.

• 1:24:39Caleb Hammer?

  Like, oh, my mom before she was a slut. Before she was a whore.

• 1:24:43Speaker 03

  At least I waited till after they were out of the house.

• 1:24:45Caleb Hammer?

  No, whore it up. We love whores. Whores are great. I'm a whore. Whore it up. We love whores. Whores is not an insult. Be a slut. That's not an insult. We love it. Do it. Thumbs up.

• 1:24:54Speaker 03

  We'll see.

• 1:24:55Caleb Hammer?

  Listen, if I want to be a whore, I need other people to be whores so that we can whore together.

• 1:24:58Speaker 03

  Here's the thing, I want to, but I just fall in love.

• 1:25:01Caleb Hammer?

  You don't want to be a whore. You hate hookups, so.

• 1:25:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:25:04Caleb Hammer?

  But be a whore. Okay, your Edmunds appraisal for your car that you've paid off is 3,194. Average and out at 4,158, but yours has a little issues, you know, a couple of cosmetic or whatever that we got. And with your VIN and Edmunds is the most accurate, so.

• 1:25:20Speaker 03

  And eventually after I pay all this, I do want to get a new car.

• 1:25:22Caleb Hammer?

  Check in account, McDop. You want to do everything after. Okay, see, this is why it's like, what's even the point of paying all this debt off? Because you're just, you know, you're just throwing it all away.

• 1:25:30Speaker 03

  It'll be like.

• 1:25:31Caleb Hammer?

  This is, you're just gonna.

• 1:25:33Speaker 03

  No, I mean, like.

• 1:25:34Caleb Hammer?

  New tits, new car.

• 1:25:36Speaker 03

  But they all have meanings behind it.

• 1:25:38Caleb Hammer?

  Student loans for the kids.

• 1:25:39Speaker 03

  Meaning behind it. Good, you know?

• 1:25:41Caleb Hammer?

  No, I don't. Shut up. McDonald's, after pay. I didn't see your after pay, but you're paying towards after pay, zelling. Okay, so Spectrum's fine, it's internet, right? And Iggy's.

• 1:25:52Speaker 03

  Cox's internet.

• 1:25:53Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 1:25:53Speaker 03

  Cox's internet.

• 1:25:54Caleb Hammer?

  What the even is that?

• 1:25:56Speaker 03

  I don't.

• 1:25:56Caleb Hammer?

  Chick-fil-A, Spotify, going in and getting some bullshit, Walmart, In-N-Out, Rembrandt, photo.

• 1:26:03Speaker 03

  Oh, senior pictures.

• 1:26:05Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my gosh. You're almost a senior citizen and you don't even have enough to survive. Home plate, home plate audible, Cinemark.

• 1:26:15Caleb Hammer?

  Go to the library audible, Amazon, go in and get some bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, ranch bar, bullshit, Afterpay, bullshit, Hulu Plus, JCPenney, Zellin' It Out, one day nail spa, god, let me see, let me see.

• 1:26:33Speaker 03

  It's not here.

• 1:26:34Caleb Hammer?

  It's not even good.

• 1:26:35Speaker 03

  It's a pedicure.

• 1:26:36Caleb Hammer?

  Not even worth it. Is there even a life worth living for you? You live in Tucson. Savings has gone down a hundred dollars now at 13.

• 1:26:42Speaker 03

  It goes in and out, like.

• 1:26:44Caleb Hammer?

  Uh huh. Service fee, three bucks. I don't know, let's see if we can budget this, this is just a mess.

• 1:26:50Speaker 03

  I think you can.

• 1:26:51Caleb Hammer?

  You just destroy all your money. I hope I can.

• 1:26:53Speaker 03

  I think you can.

• 1:26:54Caleb Hammer?

  We'll see.

• 1:26:55Speaker 03

  I think you can. All the faith.

• 1:26:57Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, five thousand dollars is our income. We know your mortgage is two thousand ninety-three dollars and thirty-six cents. Let's get your rest of your debt minimum payments. Seventy-five dollars.

• 1:27:18Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. The rest of your debt minimum payments are a thousand sixty-five dollars and seventy-one cents. Me, so that's three thousand dollars gone already. Gas, electric, utilities, all combined, plus internet, how much?

• 1:27:31Speaker 03

  Uh, hold on, let me look.

• 1:27:34Caleb Hammer?

  Big guy, you don't know, come on.

• 1:27:36Speaker 03

  I know, I know, it's mad. Okay, so... My internet is like six seventy, like sixty-five. And then my phone bill is like twenty. My...

• 1:27:51Caleb Hammer?

  Six seventy, sixty-five, for what?

• 1:27:53Speaker 03

  Huh? Sixty-five, sixty-five for internet.

• 1:27:55Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:27:56Speaker 03

  And then...

• 1:27:57Caleb Hammer?

  What is it? What is everything?

• 1:27:58Speaker 03

  Hmm, trash.

• 1:28:01Caleb Hammer?

  So how much total?

• 1:28:02Speaker 03

  One seventy.

• 1:28:03Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, including internet?

• 1:28:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:28:05Caleb Hammer?

  Good. Phone bill?

• 1:28:06Speaker 03

  That's in, that's in there.

• 1:28:08Caleb Hammer?

  Ah, gas, vroom, vroom, drive, drive?

• 1:28:10Speaker 03

  Hmm, like forty dollars.

• 1:28:12Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you don't go anywhere, that's depressing. Car insurance?

• 1:28:16Speaker 03

  Like one eighty.

• 1:28:18Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, food, for this house, okay, seventeen.

• 1:28:22Speaker 03

  So I usually spend like.

• 1:28:23Caleb Hammer?

  You go out to eat, shut the fuck up, your budget doesn't matter, you're also meal prepping, I don't care.

• 1:28:28Speaker 03

  I spend like two hundred in groceries and then nothing.

• 1:28:30Caleb Hammer?

  Doesn't matter, shut, you don't know what you're talking about, just stop, I'm putting you on the actual budget that makes, shut, be quiet now, eight hundred dollars.

• 1:28:37Speaker 03

  That's a lot.

• 1:28:38Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 1:28:39Speaker 03

  That's a lot.

• 1:28:39Caleb Hammer?

  You're, well, actually, because you have them half the time, you're right, okay, I'm gonna do seven hundred dollars. TP fun, anything else for you and the kids to survive, I'm gonna say two hundred fifty dollars, and I'm actually gonna bring food down to six fifty. Um, medical, healthcare, are there copays, monthly basis, anything? Hey, no medications, no therapy?

• 1:28:58Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:28:59Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, your kids will need it after hearing this episode.

• 1:29:02Speaker 03

  I just ended my.

• 1:29:03Caleb Hammer?

  Pets?

• 1:29:04Speaker 03

  No, uh-uh.

• 1:29:05Caleb Hammer?

  Thank.

• 1:29:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'm very allergic.

• 1:29:06Caleb Hammer?

  Gym?

• 1:29:08Speaker 03

  Uh, right now, I think it's like a hundred dollars a year, but I've already paid it for the year, but I want a different gym.

• 1:29:15Caleb Hammer?

  So what, uh, I'm gonna say like thirty bucks a month, okay, forty bucks for subscriptions, anything else that needs to be in your budget before, uh, we're done?

• 1:29:25Speaker 03

  Hmm, no, I don't think so, can you put vacation in there?

• 1:29:28Caleb Hammer?

  Nope, just fuck off, die, what are you talking about? Let's, let's see where you are, if I can allocate a couple hundred dollars to fun on a monthly basis, you can save it up.

• 1:29:36Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:29:36Caleb Hammer?

  On a monthly basis, and choose where that goes, but I would also just take care of the fucking kids.

• 1:29:40Speaker 03

  Okay, okay.

• 1:29:41Caleb Hammer?

  You dick.

• 1:29:41Speaker 03

  Okay, okay, okay, okay.

• 1:29:44Speaker 03

  So it's only forty dollars in subscriptions, I wonder, that means I'll have to cut like.

• 1:29:47Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you'll have to cut some things.

• 1:29:50Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:29:50Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and yes, you have a decent amount left over, except the budget. Three thousand eight hundred sixty-nine dollars and seven cents on a monthly basis to survive. One thousand one hundred thirty dollars and thirty-nine cents, I'll give you a hundred and thirty dollars and thirty-nine cents in fun money, you decide where that goes. Not gonna be much vacation, but thousand hours a month left, if you're thirty-seven, that takes thirty-seven months to pay off your bad debt. And then stop going into your, just turn your life around, you're dramatically behind on retirement, you own, you have four one k, well, actually, your debt's even higher, because we didn't have that first card in the calculator. Uh, forty months to pay off your debt, get a fully funded emergency fund, then live fifty, twenty-five, twenty-five, fifty percent goes.

• 1:30:32Caleb Hammer?

  To needs, fifth, 25% goes to fun. It can be whatever. Save it up on a monthly basis. Go on a big trip, whatever. 25% goes to retirement because you gotta catch up. That's what you're doing. Okay, two years to pay off the debt. Get it fully reimbursed. This is not that complicated. Well, not two years. It's gonna take probably like three and a half years.

• 1:30:49Speaker 03

  Is there a way to do it in two years?

• 1:30:51Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, make more money. Make more money. Get your raises. Work a second job when the kids aren't there. I don't know. And that's hard. So it'd probably have to be like contract job, like you driving for shit like Uber or whatever. I don't know. Okay, let's get your Hammer Financial Score. We're gonna go to the post-show. It's gonna be fun. It always is. There's always something crazy.

• 1:31:12Caleb Hammer?

  Join Hammer Elite for that. But Hammer Financial Score, spending a budget, overspend, zero out of 10. Debt, you don't have collections, but you do have a 401k loan. That's not great. That's risky. I'll give you zero out of 10 for that. Emergency fund, there's a thousand hours, one out of 10. Retirement, have a little bit, 401k loan, definitely dramatically behind, two out of 10 is the best I can give there. Real estate score, at least during the market. What was your interest rate on that house?

• 1:31:34Speaker 03

  I think it was like 4.68.

• 1:31:38Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, that's pretty good. Okay, I'll give you credit there, but negative equity position, three out of 10. Get your Hammer Financial Score at CalebHammer.com. Your Hammer Financial Score is rounded up to a 1.5 out of 10. I'll see you in the Financial Lot of Post Show. Join Hammer Elite, three premium shows posted every single day, now, six days a week. See you there.

• 1:31:57Speaker 03

  You're so like, ah, about like the whole [BEEP] thing, but you used to sell feet pictures.

• 1:32:02Caleb Hammer?

  You used to...

• 1:32:02Speaker 03

  They're like, can you put it in spaghetti? Like, no. Caleb, I don't think we really scratched the surface of her travel addiction.

• 1:32:08Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, [BEEP].

• 1:32:09Speaker 03

  She has trip amnesia. She will go on these trips to Nashville, to Vegas, DC, and just spend all the money.

• 1:32:18Caleb Hammer?

  Join us Saturday, January 31st for Hammer Elite Day, a five-hour livestream featuring all of your favorite shows, but done live with you. See you there.

• 1:32:30Speaker 01

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