The Science Of Manifestation: How To Transform Your Energy To Change Your Reality

Today's powerful masterclass brings together Dr Joe Dispenza, Dr. Tara Swart, David Ghiyam, and Dr. James Doty to explore the fascinating intersection of neuroscience, spirituality, and manifestation. We dive deep into how our brain chemistry affects relationships, the science behind attraction and bonding, and the spiritual principles that govern manifestation. Dr Dispenza breaks down the quantum physics of creation, Dr. Swart reveals groundbreaking research on the neuroscience of love, David Ghiyam shares ancient Kabbalistic wisdom on unlocking our manifestation potential, and Dr. Doty explains how fear and attachment block manifestation. Whether you're looking to improve your relationships, manifest abundance, or understand the science behind spiritual principles, this episode will transform how you think about creating the life you desire. In this episode you will learn:How to rewire your brain's neural pathways to manifest abundance by generating the emotions of your future before the experienceThe neuroscience behind why waiting to have sex can lead to stronger romantic bonds and more sustainable relationshipsWhy perfectionism and guilt are major blocks to manifestation and how to overcome them through radical self-acceptanceThe scientific explanation for why your thoughts and belief systems directly impact your ability to create your desired realityHow to expand your "vessel" to hold more abundance by developing certainty beyond logic during challenging situationsThe critical difference between achieving external success and finding true internal fulfillmentWhy fear and attachment are the greatest sources of suffering and how to overcome themFor more information go to https://www.lewishowes.com/1711For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960More SOG episodes we think you’ll love:Dr. Joe Dispenza – greatness.lnk.to/1564SCDr. Tara Swart – greatness.lnk.to/1629SCDavid Ghiyam – greatness.lnk.to/1692SCDr. James R. Doty – greatness.lnk.to/1612SC Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Lewis Howes?

  My friend, welcome back to the School of Greatness and happy holidays to you. I am so excited for what is to come in your life. And I hope you're finishing the year strong while also spending time with friends and family during this season. And today, we have a very powerful episode for you. This will be a masterclass on manifestation. And some of the most powerful episodes we had this year, based on what you guys wanted, was around manifesting the dreams that you have and drawing them to you faster. How do we create a clear vision for our life that we want? And how do we make it happen and be undeniable in the results that we want to create for ourselves?

• 0:45Lewis Howes?

  Every desire, every dream that you have, I want you to manifest them. And this is the episode that will give you clear, specific strategies, lessons and stories that you can take action on to create the ultimate dreams that you have come true. We've done a ton of research and we've got some of the biggest guests that you've loved the most this year. And I'm excited to provide them for you in one place. These nuggets that we found throughout some of the most powerful episodes we did with these top manifestation experts. We found these nuggets and we're putting them all in one episode for you. This will be a powerful masterclass that you'll want to always come back and listen to.

• 1:28Lewis Howes?

  This episode has a wealth of knowledge related to mindset, manifestation, and how to create the results you want in your life, but not five, 10 years in the future. How do we do this now? How do we bring it faster? How do we manifest more effortlessly with flow, with ease? We're going to dive into spirituality, relationships, science, and how all these topics relate to manifestation. We're also going to focus on how our brain chemistry affects relationships, the science behind attraction and bonding, and the spiritual principles that govern manifestation. This is huge because for years, people were always saying, ah, is this just like woo woo stuff? Is this just, you know, law of attraction? Does it actually work? Can it be that easy?

• 2:11Lewis Howes?

  Well, we're going to give you the spiritual and scientific principles that govern manifestation. And whether you're looking to improve in your relationships, if you're looking to manifest financial abundance, or understand the science behind spiritual principles, this episode will transform how you think about creating the life you desire. I am so excited about this. And speaking about financial abundance, if you're trying to manifest more financially, you've got to check out my brand new book called Make Money Easy. This is all about creating a rich and abundant life. And this is the book I wish I had 20 years ago, when I was broke on my sister's couch,

• 2:53Lewis Howes?

  making no money and had a ton of fear and worry around money, a lot of anxiety around money. This is going to give you the seven money habits to create financial freedom and abundance in your life. And there are so many things that I've had to learn the hard way over the last two decades about creating financial freedom, actually in the material world. But a lot of us have a poor relationship with money. In this book, I had to learn so many things from some of the top financial experts in the world about my relationship to money and how I was still living in scarcity, even though I was creating financial abundance, but emotionally, my relationship to money was struggling.

• 3:34Lewis Howes?

  So if you are trying to break free financially, externally and internally, then I want you to go to makemoneyleasybook.com and go ahead and get a copy. And when you do, all you have to do is submit your receipt on that site, makemoneyleasybook.com, and you're going to get entered into my Money Mastermind class. We're doing a free Money Mastermind class coming up soon, and I want you to get access to this live training that I'm doing. So check it out at makemoneyleasybook.com to preorder your copy and get access to our Money Mastermind class. And today we have a massive lineup. Our first guest is the one and only Dr. Joe Dispenza, who's going to break down the

• 4:19Lewis Howes?

  quantum physics of creation. He's going to show you how to rewire your brain's neural pathways to manifest abundance by generating the emotions of your future before the experience. It's so powerful. Next, we have Dr. Tara Swart, who reveals groundbreaking research on the neuroscience of love. She goes deep into the neuroscience behind why waiting to have sex can lead to longer and stronger romantic bonds and more sustainable relationships. That's not something I wanted to hear 10, 15 years ago. Our next clip will come from David Guim, who has exploded on our channel in the last couple of months, here on the School of Greatness.

• 5:00Lewis Howes?

  He's going to share how to unlock your true manifestation potential by expanding your body to hold more abundance and develop certainty beyond logic during challenging situations. Finally, we have the brilliant Dr. James Doty, who explains how fear and attachment block manifestation. He's going to be covering the critical difference between achieving external success and finding true internal fulfillment, and why fear and attachment are the greatest sources of suffering and how to overcome them. I am so excited for you to dive into this episode, all about manifestation. Let me know your thoughts on this episode.

• 5:42Lewis Howes?

  Make sure to follow the show on Apple and on Spotify, and leave us a review on your biggest takeaway from this episode. Also, just copy and paste the link and send it to one or two friends who you want to see succeed in 2025 and beyond. If you have any friends or family that you want to see win in their life, in their relationships, in their money goals, in their dreams, forward them the link to this episode right now, and let them know you care about them and want to see them succeed. That is one of the most powerful things. Generosity and gratitude is the gateway to abundance. You deserve it, and it means you've got to start living into gratitude and generosity even more. I am so pumped for you to dive into this episode on manifestation.

• 6:32Joe Dispenza?

  Let's learn the formula of how to create, right?

• 6:34James Doty?

  Yes.

• 6:35Joe Dispenza?

  So then, you'd have to feel those emotions before the experience occurred. And if you understood that you could dissociate all of your attention from this three-dimensional reality, and have no attention on anything known, and understand that it's the field that creates matter, that matter that emits the field, and if you could get to that place and change your energy with a clear intention and elevated emotion, your heart starts beating in this beautiful rhythm like a drum. We've measured it so many times. And when that occurs, the next thing that happens, the heart informs the brain, "It's safe to create now." So the person relaxes into the present moment. And then we see this, like if you took a big sheet, you know,

• 7:21Joe Dispenza?

  and a blanket, and you went like that, the energy of the heart actually informs the brain to move into these beautiful elegant states of alpha brainwave patterns, coherent alpha. And that's saying, "What's the next dream? What's the next opportunity you want to experience?" That's a state of creation. So now you have a Wi-Fi signal. You got a coherent brain. That's a directive, that's a signal out. And you got this coherent heart. That's what draws it to us, right? You combine those two. And if there's a vibrational match between your energy and that potential in the quantum field, and you're feeling abundant, and whatever your brain associates with being abundant, that's your call. That's what the creative process is. This is the creative center.

• 8:05Joe Dispenza?

  The brain, frontal lobe, actually says, "What would it be like to be creative or abundant? I don't know what it'd be like to be abundant." Well, then, go read a few books on people who actually became abundant and realized it wasn't a glorious process. They failed miserably. They got betrayed. They learned a lot of lessons, but they persevered. And what are the qualities of that person that you could embody? That's the key, right? Because it's not about wealth. It's who you become, right? Because people think it's about their wealth, but it's the becoming process. It's the overcoming.

• 8:39James Doty?

  That attracted that, right?

• 8:40Joe Dispenza?

  Of course. So then... So then, you gotta turn the battleship around because most people say, "I can't feel grateful for my wealth because it hasn't happened yet." That's the hypnosis. Waiting for the experience to happen to feel grateful. Well, that's Newtonian, that's three-dimensional reality, that's cause and effect. In quantum, you gotta feel it in order for you to experience it. Okay, so this heart becomes like an amplifier. And it sends that signal out, and that frequency can carry the thought of your abundance. Suffering cannot carry the thought of your abundance. Lack cannot carry the thought of your abundance. It's a different frequency, right? We feel different feelings like suffering, we think different thoughts, alright? So, people can say, "I'm abundant, I'm abundant, I'm abundant, I'm abundant," all they want,

• 9:25Joe Dispenza?

  but that thought is never making it to the body because it's stopping at the brainstem because the body's saying, "I'm miserable, I'm unhappy, I'm in lack." Right? So, the affirmation doesn't work, right? Okay, so let's go one step further.

• 9:37Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 9:38Joe Dispenza?

  So if you practiced this, and you actually understood, you know, well, we teach this pretty well, but if you learned it just like learning how to play handball, or learning how to hit a golf ball, learning how to dance a salsa, if you just practiced the form and you got really good at it. If you were doing it properly then, what would be the outcome? The experiment of being abundant would be that you would have to feel that feeling. It's so good at doing it with your eyes closed. You gotta do it with your eyes open. Now, why? Because if you're feeling the feelings of your emotions, of your future, you're no longer looking for them.

• 10:17Lewis Howes?

  Because you're in the future now.

• 10:19Joe Dispenza?

  Your body is so objective that it's believing it's living in that reality where you are abundant. As long as you feel that emotion, you're not separate from it any longer. You're no longer in lack. You're no longer looking for it to occur, say, "Why hasn't it happened yet?" If you're feeling abundant, why would you look? Right? So then, our job then is to be able to maintain that modified state of mind and body. So, okay, so does that mean like you should check your bank account tomorrow and see if there's a half a million dollars in it? No. You keep tuning into that potential, and then here come the synchronicities. Yes. What's that? That's feedback in your environment. The universe is saying, "Hey, Louis, whatever you're doing, all of a sudden, you're starting to create," right?

• 11:03Joe Dispenza?

  And I think it's so important for people to remember that they're the creators of their lives instead of the victim of their lives, right? So the victim is saying, "I'm feeling this way because that person or that circumstance, or I don't have any money is causing me to feel this way. This is my relationship with money." What that really means is, I'm using my lack to reaffirm my dependency, my addiction, my conditioning. That's my relationship with money, is that I put my attention on money because I don't have it. So the relationship with money is, of course, built on lack. And so when they don't have it, they feel bad. And what they're really saying is, my outer environment, my reality, is actually controlling the way I feel and the way I think. So, "Louis, why are you in a good mood today?

• 11:48Joe Dispenza?

  Things are going good. Why in a bad mood? Things are going bad today." So this unconscious program of victimization is saying that we're allowing our environment to influence the way we feel and the way we think. Isn't that what victimization is? And the stronger the emotion we have to our lack, the more we put our attention on the fact that we don't have it, right? So then the person has forgotten that they're creating reality because what they're creating is lack. And they're creating more of it. And then they try harder, and they force harder, and they... And they're more exhausted, and their body's tired. And they're breaking down, and right. So the experiment then is, let's try it another way. Let's create from the field instead of from matter. Get a coherent heart, get a coherent brain, relax in the heart, and energy moves right into the brain.

• 12:33Joe Dispenza?

  We've measured this a thousand times. And all of a sudden, the person moves into these beautiful, elegant brainwave states where they're super creative, right? So the longer you're conscious of that energy, the more you draw that future to you. So then, what does the synchronicity mean? It means whatever you're doing inside of you is producing that effect outside of you. Pay attention to what you did. Keep doing more of it. So generate a little bit more abundance, just for an experiment. Now, when the synchronicity happens, do you think you feel suffering, or do you think you feel a little excitement? You feel inspired, right? So then that synchronicity is saying, "Use this energy, use this feeling. It should be easier for you to feel this now, and go back and do it again." Keep the experiment going. And here comes the promotion, here comes the email,

• 13:17Joe Dispenza?

  here comes the person you meet at the right time. Yes. Well, we have something happening here. And then that becomes the momentum, right? So then, we generate abundance. That's how we do it. And the relationship- It doesn't just happen by accident, we generate it. We generate abundance, right? So then, if you have an hour meditation where you're tuning into your abundant future, but then you're spending the other 15 hours a day in lack, don't expect anything to change, you default it. You're back to the old energy. And if you say it's that person or that circumstance or that bank account, I'm gonna say you're back to the unconscious program of being a victim, right? So then, so then, so then let's go a step further.

• 14:00Joe Dispenza?

  If your personality creates your personal reality, and it does, and your personality is made up of how you think, how you act, and how you feel, then the present personality who's listening to this podcast has created the present personal reality called their life. Nothing big there. Which means if you wanna change your personal reality, you're gonna have to change your personality. Right. Nothing changes in your life until you change, right? So then, 95% of who we are is on autopilot, right? It's programmed thoughts, hardwired thoughts, beliefs, perceptions, unconscious habits and behaviors, and really, really emotional responses that tend to be really knee-jerk and automatic, right?

• 14:43Joe Dispenza?

  So if 95% of who we are is a set of unconscious programs, then the first step to change is becoming conscious of those unconscious thoughts. Now, people think when they sit down to do the work and make their change, that they're doing something wrong. No, those thoughts have to come up. "I can't, I'm not worthy, it's never gonna work." But a person who's truly persevering towards their abundance realizes just because they have that thought doesn't mean it's true. They're curious on what's on the other side of that thought. Ah, well, that's just the thought, right? And nerve cells that no longer fire together, no longer wire together. So you keep moving past that thought, it has less and less power over you, right?

• 15:27Joe Dispenza?

  Now, you have power over it, or better yet, you're using your brain in the proper way, instead of being a victim to your brain, right? If you complain about money, if you judge people who have it, if you rush when you're in lack, if you cheat when you don't have what you need, an abundant person doesn't do that. You gotta look at that and say, "I gotta break these habits." "Oh, my God, if I truly wanna be abundant, I can't act this way." Now, here's the big one.

• 15:59Joe Dispenza?

  If I truly wanna be a new personality that's in a new personal reality, I can't take lack with me. I can't take unworthiness. I can't take the story that goes along with it with my parents, or my grandparents, or my ex, or whatever. That story has to end, right? I mean, if not now, when, right? How do people end those stories? Well, of course. Well, how many times do we have to forget until we stop forgetting and start remembering? That's the game, right? That's the game called change. How many times we have to go unconscious and default to that old personality when we catch ourselves? And stop doing that and get conscious? That's the moment of change. So, the problem is, is that most people wake up in the morning and they think, "Let me think of my problems."

• 16:43Joe Dispenza?

  The brain has a record of the past, right? So, they think about their problems. They don't have enough money. And those problems are usually connected to certain people, at certain places, with certain objects, and certain things. What didn't work out, or who screwed me over. So, the moment they wake up, the moment they remember those problems, they're thinking in the past. So, now, they're firing and wiring the memory. They're keeping the memory of past alive in their mind. The problem is, every one of those memories has an emotion associated with it because we've experienced it. So, when they feel the lack, when they feel the unhappiness, when they feel the anxiety, now the body's in the past. Thoughts being the language of the brain, feelings being the language of the body, how we think and how we feel creates our state of being.

• 17:26Joe Dispenza?

  But the conditioning process starts because conditioning only needs a thought and a feeling, a memory, or an image and an emotion, and a stimulus and response. And you're conditioning your body to become the mind of that emotion. And now, the memory's not in the brain. Now, the memory's buried subconsciously in the body. And the body becomes the mind of that emotion. So, the body is living in lack. And it's believing.

• 17:52Lewis Howes?

  The body is, is that through the nervous system? Or is that through?

• 17:55Joe Dispenza?

  Neurochemical, everything. So, so, so the body's so objective that it does not know the difference between the real-life experience that's creating the lack and the emotion that you're creating by thought alone called lack. The body's believing it's living the same past experience every day. Why? Because the end product of an experience is an emotion. Well, if you, your life is changing, but you're still feeling lack, don't expect anything to change. You, you won't even see it. You'll walk right past it. You're viewing your life through the lens of the past. Okay? So, okay, so then a person realizes that all their friends are making money and they're doing stuff, and they're like, wow, I'm really feeling lack now.

• 18:35Joe Dispenza?

  So then, when it no longer becomes about your abundance, and it becomes about your change, that's a valuable moment. When it's no longer about your healing, but it's about your change. I paid attention to a lot of people in the last couple of years tell their story. The people who heal in this work from cancers and all kinds of chronic health conditions, and Parkinson's, and strokes, and paralysis, and all kinds of things, rare genetic disorders. It, it never was about, when they really got in the game, it was never about their healing. It was about, what do I need to change in order to heal?

• 19:17Joe Dispenza?

  When the game goes like that, so then, the person who's feeling lack, on some level or another, it's not just in the mind, it's in the body, right?

• 19:26Lewis Howes?

  Let me say, let me hear you say that again. When someone's looking for abundance, it's never about the abundance, it's about the change they need to make for healing?

• 19:35Joe Dispenza?

  No, the, the, I'm using healing as an example.

• 19:38Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 19:39Joe Dispenza?

  But let's use abundance as an example.

• 19:41Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 19:42Joe Dispenza?

  When, when you understand that you cannot get abundant. When it's no longer about the game called abundance, it's about the game called change. What do I need to change? The more I change, the more I'll be abundant.

• 19:53Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 19:54Joe Dispenza?

  So then it's no longer about why haven't, how come it hasn't happened? That's the old personality, separate from the experience still in lack, asking that question.

• 20:01Lewis Howes?

  Which is creating your current reality.

• 20:03Joe Dispenza?

  Which is reaffirming it, because that's the lens you're perceiving it through. Okay, so.

• 20:08Lewis Howes?

  So we should be focusing more on what we need to change every moment as opposed to the abundance or the healing?

• 20:13Joe Dispenza?

  Well, the word meditation means to become familiar with. Sit with yourself long enough and not turn on your cellphone, not scroll through your social media, do no TikTok, no emails, none of that stuff. Don't, just sit and close your eyes and watch the thoughts that come up. That's the exact reason why you're not abundant. Watch what you want to do when you're feeling lack, to take away the lack. And there's always something you would do to take it away. But sit with the lack and be curious on what's on the other side of it, right? Because the body's programmed into lack now, subconsciously, right? So the emotion of lack drives our thoughts and drives our behaviors. So it makes sense then that if an emotion is a record of the past,

• 20:58Joe Dispenza?

  then we're doing things habitually from the past. We're thinking in the past, right? So lower the volume to the emotion every time you notice lack comes up. And just like breaking any addiction, there's going to be cravings, right? So the body's going, hey, Louis, it's been about two hours.

• 21:15Lewis Howes?

  You're so used to doing this thing.

• 21:16Joe Dispenza?

  Yeah, you've been thinking lacking thoughts about 150,000 times a day, and you're just going to stop now. The body is going to start influencing the mind and saying, it's not going to work, you're a loser, it didn't work before, it's too hard, everybody else.

• 21:30Lewis Howes?

  That's why it's so hard for people to like lose weight or get in shape, because you might try it for a few days and then the cravings are, I'm tired and I want to go default back into the old personality.

• 21:38Joe Dispenza?

  Right, because why? Because the body, which has been conditioned, the mind, the body is the unconscious mind. So the body's got used to the familiar feeling. Even, they don't even know it's lack. It's just how they feel. It's not guilt. So, okay, let me finish. Okay, so the hardest part about all of this is making a different choice. And the moment you decide to make a different choice, get ready, it's gonna feel uncomfortable. Right. It's gonna feel unfamiliar. Your body's all of a sudden saying, "Hey Louis, why don't you start thinking those same exact thoughts, do the same things, make the same choices, demonstrate the same behaviors, have the same experiences." So you could feel that feeling of lack, complain again to somebody, call somebody up and say how miserable your life is, right? And that's the known, right?

• 22:20Joe Dispenza?

  So the body's always influencing the mind to return back to the familiar territory. To the default. Yeah, the default, okay. All right, so now the person says, "Okay, what thoughts do I not want?" What would an abundant person think this way? The people in our work that have created... I had a guy come to our event, I love this guy. He healed himself, he tried to take his life three times. He told me that when he came to our work, he didn't have $2 to rub together. He's worth hundreds of millions of dollars now. And he just keeps giving it away. Wow. His lesson, his lesson was, and that wasn't the wealth,

• 23:04Joe Dispenza?

  it was who he became. So it's the overcoming process that is the becoming process. Who did he become in that journey? Exactly. He had to get beyond all of those thoughts of his past, all the mistakes he made, all the things he did wrong, all the money he owed there, all of that. That was like, he just had to no longer be that person any longer. But he did say, "How would a wealthy person live?" And when he created his wealth, what do you think the first thing he did? Started giving? Giving it away. Why? Because an abundant person doesn't have any lack, and he knows how to create more of it. And he's in the experiment, "Well, what would happen if I keep giving it away?" He keeps getting more.

• 23:47Joe Dispenza?

  That's a good experiment to have, because he is actually living in that abundant state. He also had tremendous healings taking place, because when you heal your heart, you heal your mind, I mean, it's just the way it is. We saw it so many times, right? So he healed his heart, he got an upgrade, he got an upgrade, right? So then, the next fundamental question is, "How would an abundant person think?" Write it down, dude, and fire and wire those thoughts in your brain, and install the hardware. Keep doing it with attention and intention, it becomes the new voice in your head, it becomes a software program. Then say, "Okay."

• 24:23Joe Dispenza?

  ¿Cómo voy a ser en mi vida hoy? ¿Cómo se comportaría una persona abundante? Y antes de que te alcantes a tu teléfono celular y empieces a escoger tus redes sociales, cierra tus ojos y rehearse en tu mente cómo esa persona caminaría, cómo respiraría, cómo sonreiría, cómo saludaría a la gente, cómo estaría en llamadas Zoom, cómo estaría en el tráfico, cómo estaría en la cena. Y el acto de cerrar tus ojos y rehechar mentalmente el acto, si estás realmente presente, el cerebro no sabe la diferencia entre la experiencia de la vida real y lo que estás imaginando. De hecho, solo un poco de tiempo, empiezas a instalar el hardware neurológico para parecer que ya lo has hecho. Ahora el cerebro ya no es un registro del pasado, está preparado para el futuro.

• 25:07Joe Dispenza?

  Continúa haciéndolo, continúa rehestando. No es diferente a jugar un instrumento, no es diferente a aprender a bailar, no es diferente a aprender a actuar o a jugar a un deporte. Todo el mundo siempre está rehestando, ¿verdad? El proceso de rehejo cambia el cerebro para parecer que ya lo has hecho, que ya lo has experimentado. ¿Cuál es la parte esencial de eso? El hardware está en marcha. Ahora todo lo que tienes que hacer es entrar en el huésped. Continúa haciéndolo, se convierte en un programa de software. Empiezas a actuar como una persona abundante. Todo cambia. Tu energía cambia, tu estado de ánimo cambia, la forma en que caminas, la forma en que respiras, tu postura cambia. Estás fuera del conocimiento, ¿verdad? Tienes que condicionar el cuerpo ahora emocionalmente al futuro. No puedes abrir tus ojos en la mañana

• 25:50Joe Dispenza?

  hasta que te sientas digno de recibir. Y si no te sientes digno de recibir, entonces si no ahora, ¿cuándo? Si te toma dos horas llegar allí, pregúntame si es digno de 30 años de correr tratando de conseguir lo que necesitas de la materia. Así que entonces la persona que lucha con su carencia, están fuera de los bleachers y están en el campo de juego. Aquí es lo que aprendimos. Vamos a volver a las creencias ahora. Así que recuerda, la creencia es solo la pensación que continúas pensando una y otra vez. Una creencia es algo que continúas pensando lo suficiente veces que te lo has fijado en tu cerebro y se convierte en un programa automático. Y tenemos creencias sobre todo tipo de cosas: dinero, relaciones, Dios, lo que sea. Todo está basado en lo que nos han dicho

• 26:34Joe Dispenza?

  o en nuestras experiencias pasadas, ¿verdad? The boundaries of those beliefs are our emotions, right? So, let's just say you got betrayed, or somebody abused you, or your father told you that money was bad and there's never enough of it, or whatever. That's a story, okay? But somehow it left an impression on you, remember that event very clearly, and that's kind of rooted in who you are, right? Okay, so that emotion then is the boundary of our belief, okay? So, how you think and how you feel creates your state of being. If you take a thought and a feeling, a thought and a feeling, a thought and a feeling, a thought and a feeling, that's called an attitude. A series of good thoughts with a series of good feelings, you say I have a good attitude today. You have a series of negative thoughts that are connected to a series of negative feelings,

• 27:19Joe Dispenza?

  you say I have a bad attitude today. So attitudes are just shortened states of being. Good attitude in the morning, bad attitude in the afternoon. If you take an attitude, an attitude, an attitude, and you keep those up, and you string attitudes together, you create what's called a belief. And a belief is just an extended state of being. So if you keep thinking the same thought, you keep hardwiring it in the brain, you keep feeling the same feeling, you keep conditioning in your body, the redundancy of that cycle, over and over again, conditions the body to subconsciously become the mind of that belief. And all beliefs are subconscious states of being, okay? Take a belief, a belief, a belief, and you string them together, you form what's called a perception.

• 28:01Joe Dispenza?

  And perceptions are just such extended states of being that we're unconscious. And so then we edit out reality. In fact, most people don't see things the way they are, they see things the way they are, right? And people are always filling in reality unconsciously based on their memory. They could be married to a person for 40 years, and they don't see the person, they see the memory of the person, right? And there's research to prove this, okay? So how do we change a belief or perception about ourselves or our lives? Okay, we've studied this. Okay, let's just say that lack is ingrained in there. You got the story, you lived on the streets, you lost everything, you got betrayed.

• 28:43Joe Dispenza?

  Your business partner took everything, took your wife, took... You've got the story in the half, okay? Okay, you gotta start telling the new story of the future, right? You gotta believe in that future more than you have to believe in the past. So how do you do that? You only believe in the past when you feel the emotions of the past. The only time you're gonna believe in the future is when you feel the emotions of the future, right? Okay? So, in order for us to change our belief or perception about ourself and our lives, we have to make a decision with such firm intention that the amplitude of that decision carries a level of energy that's greater than the hardwired programs in your brain and the emotional conditioning in your body.

• 29:25Joe Dispenza?

  And your body literally has to respond to your mind. That the choice that you're making to change in that moment becomes a moment in time that you never forget. And here's the key. Physically. Physically. The stronger the emotion you feel when you make that choice, the more you'll remember the decision. Okay, so then how do we down-regulate that old belief? If the trauma created an emotional quotient of six or seven, then your decision to change your beliefs gotta be a nine. Right. And you gotta come out of your resting state, and that moment has to define you. You could say, "I know exactly where I was, the time of day it was, who I was with, when I made my mind up to change." Right? Because you created a long-term memory.

• 30:10Joe Dispenza?

  Long-term memories are created from strong emotion. Right. But if the amplitude of that emotion is greater than the betrayal, boom, the body starts responding to the mind, and you're actually giving your body a taste of the future emotionally. So you brand your... What's possible? No, your body's actually getting the taste of that future event. It's experiencing the future now. Exactly. Big explosion in the quantum field. Big explosion. So the side effect of that... Is if you combine that clear intention with that elevated emotion, you're basically remembering your future and it looks no different than remembering your past. Think neurologically within the circuits of that memory and feel within the emotions of that new belief

• 30:53Joe Dispenza?

  and watch your life begin to change because nothing changes in our life that we change. And when we change our energy, we change our life. So now the experiment all of a sudden is no longer based on it being hard or trying or wishing or wanting or hoping. That's what we do in our lack or lack or separation. It's about change. So then when we finally realize in order for us to become abundant, we have to overcome the old personality. And that's 95% of who we are, right?

• 31:22Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 31:23Joe Dispenza?

  So then the side effect of the beginning of this process is a lot of discomfort. It is a lot of discomfort because you're stepping outside the known into the unknown and now you can't predict.

• 31:37Lewis Howes?

  It's scary.

• 31:38Joe Dispenza?

  No, no, you'd rather hold on to your lack.

• 31:40Lewis Howes?

  The pain, the suffering.

• 31:41Joe Dispenza?

  Rather tell the story of that, at least it makes you feel something that's familiar. When you step outside and you're saying, "I'm not going to complain about money any longer. I'm not going to complain about I don't have any. I'm not going to judge other people who do. I'm not going to say I can't, I'm not worthy, it's never going to work." All those things got to go. "I'm not going to feel lack, I'm not going to feel unworthy, I'm not going to feel separation, I'm not going to feel resentment. These are the things that are keeping my reality the same." Now it's no longer about abundance, about who you become. So the overcoming process becomes the becoming process. And so many people come through this work, they want abundance, they want healing, they want a new relationship, they want a new career, they want the mystical, but really they want wholeness.

• 32:27Lewis Howes?

  What does neuroscience tell us about signs, signals and synchronicities? Are they, you know, something we should be paying attention to based on neuroscience and brain chemistry? Or is it more spiritual woo-woo?

• 32:43Dr. Tara Swart?

  Well, neuroscience doesn't tell us anything about that or much, let's say, about that at the moment, but that's why I'm probably going to write another book, which I said I would never do. But I'm just so fascinated by this. So when I get back to London, I'm going to start like properly doing the research on this. So far, it's been kind of something I'm interested in. And I have to say, I wasn't sure if my book publisher would be okay with it. And

• 33:14Lewis Howes?

  About these things, signs, signals, synchronicities?

• 33:17Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 33:18Lewis Howes?

  Well, that's fascinating. I love that stuff.

• 33:20Dr. Tara Swart?

  And I think that it coming from a neuroscientist is a new angle. It's not that there aren't books out there on this kind of thing. But I really want to open up that conversation as well, because there's a lot of people suffering. And like I said, you can sound like you're crazy if you start talking about stuff like this. So I want to open up the conversation,

• 33:46Dr. Tara Swart?

  being open, but trying to keep it as rigorous as possible to give people permission to come forward and share these stories. Because I think that's only going to be good for everyone.

• 33:54Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's cool. So when when someone sees the signs, signals, and synchronicities happening in their life, what do you think that's telling them? That they're on the right path, that they should be paying attention more, that they should be trusting their intuition more when they're seeing these three things?

• 34:14Dr. Tara Swart?

  So I feel like what it says, and somebody said this to me, actually, the last time I was in LA, but it had to land really emotionally for me to to believe it. And that's what I want for everyone, is it tells you that you are being guided, and it tells you that you're safe and protected.

• 34:34Lewis Howes?

  All right.

• 34:35Dr. Tara Swart?

  And one of the things I picked up from you a couple of years ago, was that you said, sometimes, you know, if I'm feeling like in an emotional crisis, I just say to myself, I'm safe, I'm safe, I'm safe. And I can't tell you how many times I've used that in the last two years.

• 34:49Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's beautiful.

• 34:50Dr. Tara Swart?

  But that's kind of like self-soothing the inner child, right?

• 34:53Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 34:55Dr. Tara Swart?

  With this kind of interest and more esoteric things that I've had, like since I met you that time. I'd like to think that it's not, I'm not just safe because I tell myself I'm safe, but I'm safe because I believe in something greater.

• 35:09Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 35:10Dr. Tara Swart?

  And I'm tapping into it and I'm allowing it to make me feel safe.

• 35:15Dr. Tara Swart?

  Because however good you become psychologically at soothing yourself, you can still feel very alone.

• 35:25Dr. Tara Swart?

  So feeling like.

• 35:26Lewis Howes?

  Unless you have a deeper spiritual connection to something.

• 35:30Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's what I meant to say.

• 35:33Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's fascinating. Do you believe that we can be in beautiful, healthy, loving relationships? And we can manifest everything we have on our vision or action boards? If we have yet to heal the wounds of our childhood? As a neuroscientist?

• 35:52Dr. Tara Swart?

  No.

• 35:53Lewis Howes?

  Really? Wow. So if we have these visions and dreams and goals that we want to go after, if we want to have a beautiful relationship, but we are wounded still, the inner child is wounded inside of us as adults, what will happen to us?

• 36:11Dr. Tara Swart?

  So this is really about inner child and shadow, right? So we, I think people understand that you've got an inner child that maybe didn't get over things that you experienced in your childhood. Shadow is about the parts of yourself that you've rejected because as a young child, you rely on your primary caregivers for survival.

• 36:31Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 36:32Dr. Tara Swart?

  And if there is something that they don't love about you, you want to hide that for all the world so that they will still love you and like not let you die.

• 36:40Lewis Howes?

  You don't want anyone to know this about you.

• 36:42Dr. Tara Swart?

  No.

• 36:42Lewis Howes?

  That's shame.

• 36:43Dr. Tara Swart?

  So you hide it away in childhood and often find yourself in adulthood no longer even aware of what those things are because you've rejected them so deeply.

• 36:52Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 36:53Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah. But that's driving a lot of your unconscious behavior.

• 36:57Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 36:58Dr. Tara Swart?

  So if you put together the inner child and the shadow, then what happens is you meet people on the same level of psychological wound as you.

• 37:08Lewis Howes?

  Oh, they have.

• 37:10Dr. Tara Swart?

  You also leave people where if you evolve out of that and they haven't been able to.

• 37:15Lewis Howes?

  Wow. Which I think goes back to one of the things, one of the pieces of content I heard you talk about, which is like the sense of smell connecting to someone's stress levels or anxiety levels. Like you'll kind of attract a similar nervous system or I guess a certain similar like, I don't know, stress level?

• 37:33Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah, so it's not, it's not, it's not smell. It's sensing, sensing, not through smell, the level of the stress hormone, yeah.

• 37:42Lewis Howes?

  Interesting.

• 37:42Dr. Tara Swart?

  But that's short term, right? But the inner child and shadow stuff is longer term.

• 37:47Lewis Howes?

  Gosh, that's fascinating.

• 37:47Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 37:48Lewis Howes?

  So you think we attract people based on our psychological wounds?

• 37:52Dr. Tara Swart?

  Hundred percent.

• 37:54Lewis Howes?

  Wow. And as we start to heal and grow, if the other person's not healing and growing, we kind of pull away.

• 38:00Dr. Tara Swart?

  Uh huh.

• 38:01Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 38:03Lewis Howes?

  That's interesting.

• 38:07Dr. Tara Swart?

  Oh, I can see the cogs moving in your brain.

• 38:09Lewis Howes?

  Fascinating. Speaking, I guess, about relationships and men and women. With all of your expertise on the brain, is the process of manifesting love and falling in love different for men versus women?

• 38:22Dr. Tara Swart?

  I think if it's love you're really looking for, then it's not different.

• 38:25Lewis Howes?

  Not lust.

• 38:26Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah, the issue is what you're actually looking for.

• 38:30Lewis Howes?

  So you think men and women manifest love the same way, similar ways?

• 38:35Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah, I think if, you know, if you want that sense of partnership and friendship and intimacy and you want to be loyal and you want it to be for the long term, then it doesn't matter what gender you are. But if the disconnect is often, and you know, this is a bit of a stereotype, but usually it's more that men, sorry, that women want a loving, stable relationship and men perhaps, you know, don't want that as much.

• 39:00Lewis Howes?

  Want sex or whatever, yeah.

• 39:01Dr. Tara Swart?

  Or don't, you know, just don't want it right now. But go through periods where that's what they want and go through periods where that's not what they want, which I guess could be true of any gender as well. But overall, more likely, women will want to like be in a monogamous relationship.

• 39:15Lewis Howes?

  Why is that based on kind of the brain size?

• 39:18Dr. Tara Swart?

  Um, so. It comes from evolution. So when we lived in the cave, women did need men to protect them from predators and to hunt for food. So women tend-

• 39:30Lewis Howes?

  Especially if they're pregnant too, and they weren't able to go out and hunt or gather, or whatever it might be.

• 39:35Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah, yeah. They, I mean, they generally didn't hunt as much, so they gathered more. But then it's hard to get protein from what you gather rather than what you hunt. So, so for survival, and you know, they used the, the fat and the skins and everything. So it wasn't just food, it was shelter and-

• 39:53Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 39:54Dr. Tara Swart?

  -fire and, you know, all of that kind of stuff. So although we don't necessarily need a man for those physical things now, it's a very strong survival wiring in the brain. And so what we have, you know, in, in the cave, we lived nomadically. So often the men would go and hunt and be away for a very long time. Or if they went far enough and they found a cave of the, of the same tribe, they would just stay there and not go back. Why risk your life to travel back for, you know, six weeks?

• 40:28Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 40:29Dr. Tara Swart?

  But over time, a lot of societies in the modern world have asked people to live in unit families. And so we have seen men's brains be rewired.

• 40:39Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 40:40Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah. Quite recently, relatively recently, like maybe in the last 10 years, research has showed that when you become a dad for the first time, oxytocin rewires your brain so that you're more into bonding and less into the testosterone competitive stuff. Because if you think about it, lions and tigers, they'll eat their own children.

• 40:59Lewis Howes?

  You have to tame that in some ways, right?

• 41:01Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 41:01Lewis Howes?

  But how do you, how do you tame it, but also harness it in other ways? You know what I mean? It's like a dance of like having drive and testosterone.

• 41:09Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 41:10Lewis Howes?

  Like, I never want to lose that drive, right?

• 41:13Dr. Tara Swart?

  I get this question all the time.

• 41:14Lewis Howes?

  But I also want to be like a great, loving parent and partner and all these things.

• 41:18Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 41:19Lewis Howes?

  And not let testosterone drive me in doing damaging things now, so.

• 41:24Dr. Tara Swart?

  Well, so from about the age of 35, your testosterone will have started dropping significantly already.

• 41:31Lewis Howes?

  On mine.

• 41:36Dr. Tara Swart?

  One's testosterone tends to drop from that age. So when you do become a dad-

• 41:44Lewis Howes?

  It drops after you become a dad.

• 41:46Dr. Tara Swart?

  For the first time, oxytocin goes up, testosterone drops. You become much more about like cuddling and bonding and wanting to stay in the home and look after the

• 41:55Lewis Howes?

  Interesting.

• 41:56Dr. Tara Swart?

  mom and the baby.

• 41:57Lewis Howes?

  Less about, less about like lifting and like hunting, right?

• 42:00Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 42:01Lewis Howes?

  Interesting.

• 42:01Dr. Tara Swart?

  If you keep lifting, then you would actually like keep your testosterone levels higher. Also, if the baby sleeps in the same room as you, then your testosterone levels drop even more.

• 42:10Lewis Howes?

  Come on.

• 42:11Dr. Tara Swart?

  So you might want to move out for three months to a different bedroom.

• 42:14Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. I've already told her, I'm getting my sleep, you know, the first few months. So your testosterone drops?

• 42:20Dr. Tara Swart?

  If you sleep in the same room as the baby.

• 42:22Lewis Howes?

  Why is that?

• 42:23Dr. Tara Swart?

  Because you're, because the oxytocin's becoming like, you know, higher and higher because you've got this cute little warm thing that smells so nice and is so like vulnerable and dependent on you. And it's like in the room with you the whole eight hours, you know, just oxytocin boost.

• 42:38Lewis Howes?

  But are women attracted to men with less testosterone?

• 42:42Dr. Tara Swart?

  Um, they are when they're not fertile, but they are not when they are at peak fertility.

• 42:48Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 42:48Dr. Tara Swart?

  So mid-cycle, when you're ovulating, you're going to want a bad boy. And the rest of the time, you're going to want a nice man that will stay at home and help you look after the baby.

• 42:58Lewis Howes?

  So if you're not a bad boy, when you're at peak fertility as a woman, is that going to hurt the relationship if you don't give women what they want?

• 43:06Dr. Tara Swart?

  Hang on, say that again.

• 43:08Lewis Howes?

  So if a man is not a

• 43:09Dr. Tara Swart?

  Not a bad boy.

• 43:10Lewis Howes?

  Not a bad boy.

• 43:11Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 43:11Lewis Howes?

  When a woman is at peak fertility. And the man just wants to cuddle and chill and not be driven by testosterone and give the woman that, that testosterone feel.

• 43:21Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 43:21Lewis Howes?

  Well, that ultimately hurts the relationship long-term if the woman doesn't get what she wants sexually?

• 43:26Dr. Tara Swart?

  I mean, I think if she's chosen him by then. So this is more about when you're like in the choosing phase. Once you've settled down with someone, then you have like a logical conversation about are we trying for a baby or not, right?

• 43:39Lewis Howes?

  But logic and emotion are two different things.

• 43:41Dr. Tara Swart?

  No, I mean

• 43:41Lewis Howes?

  In relationships, you know, you might logically say, okay, I'm safe, but emotionally you want something else.

• 43:47Dr. Tara Swart?

  This is a reason that people cheat.

• 43:49Lewis Howes?

  Right, right. Because they're not getting what they want sexually.

• 43:52Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 43:53Lewis Howes?

  And so it's like, how do you suppress the thing you want sexually to be like, oh, but he's such a good guy? Or he's this and but if he's not giving me what I want, then I'm gonna go find it from this other younger testosterone driven man, right?

• 44:05Dr. Tara Swart?

  You're getting really jealous here.

• 44:07Lewis Howes?

  Not getting jealous.

• 44:09Dr. Tara Swart?

  This fantasy younger, high testosterone man.

• 44:13Lewis Howes?

  Well, I'm just thinking, is this what women deal with?

• 44:15Dr. Tara Swart?

  I know.

• 44:15Lewis Howes?

  Is this what women deal with?

• 44:17Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah, to some, you know, more consciously or less consciously, depending on the woman.

• 44:22Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, it's interesting, right?

• 44:25Dr. Tara Swart?

  So let me kind of explain the physiology behind it from the research that we know the best.

• 44:29Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 44:30Dr. Tara Swart?

  Which is in prairie voles. So there are two types of voles in America. Marshed or mountain voles.

• 44:39Lewis Howes?

  Voles, what's a vol?

• 44:40Dr. Tara Swart?

  Vole, it's a little rat-like creature.

• 44:43Lewis Howes?

  Prairie, prairie dogs?

• 44:46Dr. Tara Swart?

  No.

• 44:46Lewis Howes?

  Not prairie dogs?

• 44:47Dr. Tara Swart?

  It's a vol. It's more like a mouse or a rat.

• 44:49Lewis Howes?

  Okay, cool.

• 44:50Dr. Tara Swart?

  The ones that live in the marsh or the mountain, they have plenty of food and plenty of shelter. And they're super promiscuous. The ones that moved to the prairie, where there's like scarce food and shelter. They snuggle in and settle down and become monogamous for life.

• 45:08Lewis Howes?

  The same rat, the same mouse, but just living in different areas. Come on.

• 45:14Dr. Tara Swart?

  So.

• 45:14Lewis Howes?

  So wait, you're telling me rats are monogamous?

• 45:17Dr. Tara Swart?

  These voles, these voles are monogamous.

• 45:23Lewis Howes?

  If they live in the prairie.

• 45:24Dr. Tara Swart?

  If they live in the prairie, but not if they live in the marsh.

• 45:27Lewis Howes?

  But if they have a, if they have all the food and abundance, they're just.

• 45:31Dr. Tara Swart?

  And lots of female voles that they can go and visit.

• 45:35Lewis Howes?

  They're just little polyamorous voles, huh?

• 45:37Dr. Tara Swart?

  Because they know that if they get, they get, you know, one vol pregnant and she's left on her own to look after her young. They're going to survive because they're well sheltered. There's plenty of food for her to nip out and bring it back to the babies. Yeah. But in the prairie, if he was promiscuous, then the chances of his offspring dying are quite high because she can't defend the nest herself. She can't find enough food for herself and then without help. And so let's extrapolate this. How does this help humans? Right? Okay.

• 46:10Lewis Howes?

  Well, which first off, which which mice are happier? The ones that are more promiscuous or the ones that are coupled?

• 46:17Dr. Tara Swart?

  I think it depends on the on the bowl.

• 46:19Lewis Howes?

  So you think the the female mice are happy if they just, you know, are pregnant, but then their partner just leaves?

• 46:27Dr. Tara Swart?

  No, no.

• 46:27Lewis Howes?

  They're not happy?

• 46:28Dr. Tara Swart?

  No.

• 46:28Lewis Howes?

  How do we know? Can we test that?

• 46:32Lewis Howes?

  Okay, so how do we apply this to our lives?

• 46:35Dr. Tara Swart?

  There is an answer to that.

• 46:36Lewis Howes?

  Okay.

• 46:36Dr. Tara Swart?

  We test it through um levels of oxytocin and vasopressin.

• 46:40Lewis Howes?

  Come on, have we done this? Have people done this?

• 46:42Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yes.

• 46:43Lewis Howes?

  No way. These mice?

• 46:45Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 46:45Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's crazy.

• 46:46Dr. Tara Swart?

  Um, and actually, just to be serious, the research has done more to help with loneliness, grief and heartbreak. But obviously, it's got implications for dating.

• 46:58Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 46:58Dr. Tara Swart?

  Um, so because one of the things that we saw with the receptors in the brain is that, like, if if I'm in, no, it's got to be the other way around. If you're in love with me, you've got more vasopressin receptors in your nucleus accumbens, which is on the reward circuitry. And then every time you see me, you get a reward. And the longer that we've been dating and stay together and become closer, that reward becomes more intense every time you see me. However, if we then had a prolonged separation, time can down regulate the effect of those receptors. So obviously, there are implications for that in a breakup or grief, right?

• 47:39Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 47:40Dr. Tara Swart?

  Um, and but one of the things I think is like so, so important for dating is that if a woman, if a if a couple are getting to know each other, and this is all on like heterosexual couples in research. Then as a woman is sexually interested and liking the guy and enjoying the dating, her oxytocin levels is like slowly, slowly starting to go up. When they start actually having sex, she's going to be releasing higher levels of oxytocin every time she orgasms, and that's going to make her bond to the guy much more. If you have sex on the first date, the guy's vasopressin levels will plummet straight away, and all he'll be interested in is testosterone.

• 48:25Dr. Tara Swart?

  If you make him wait, his vasopressin and oxytocin levels go up. And then when you do actually have sex, he's already bonded, so it's more likely to become part of a loving relationship.

• 48:37Lewis Howes?

  Wow, so if a woman sleeps with a man on the first date or two, is a man driven to want to bond long term with that person? No.

• 48:51Lewis Howes?

  Why not?

• 48:52Dr. Tara Swart?

  Because the vasopressin levels drop as soon as he has sex.

• 48:55Lewis Howes?

  What does that mean?

• 48:56Dr. Tara Swart?

  So vasopressin is the one that makes the prairie bulls monogamous. The higher the levels of that, and that the receptors appear in the reward circuitry of your brain. And so basically, if you see your partner in distress, it affects your brain, those neurons, and you want to comfort her through physical touch.

• 49:17Dr. Tara Swart?

  So that's oxytocin. But if you haven't had time for those receptors to appear in the correct place to make you bond, then it's just, it goes back to lust. So what I say about love and relationships is that the genetics and the receptors will load the gun, but sexual activity will pull the trigger.

• 49:44Lewis Howes?

  So based on neuroscience, if you sleep with someone quickly, you're less likely to bond long term together. You're more likely to be promiscuous or just not be as interested in that person long term. Is that right? That's fascinating.

• 50:02Dr. Tara Swart?

  I know.

• 50:03Lewis Howes?

  But you hear a lot of people, but just be like, you know, just sleep with them on the first day. It's fun. Just have fun. You know, it's all good, but I just feel like you're setting yourself up for letdown.

• 50:13Dr. Tara Swart?

  But if that's what you want, that's fine.

• 50:15Lewis Howes?

  But I think. But don't expect the guy to keep liking you after that.

• 50:17Dr. Tara Swart?

  No, no. And don't say it's fine and it's fun if you actually want a long term relationship and then be disappointed that they didn't want that too.

• 50:24Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. So the brain chemistry within a man changes after if they have sex earlier with a woman.

• 50:32Dr. Tara Swart?

  And it changes in a different way if they wait and they actually like create a bond and then.

• 50:38Lewis Howes?

  First.

• 50:39Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 50:39Lewis Howes?

  And then have sex.

• 50:40Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 50:41Lewis Howes?

  What changes within a woman when they have sex with a man? Do they become more bonded to the person?

• 50:48Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah. So for the woman, it's not so much to do with whether they are already in love with the person or not. If they're having sex and they're releasing oxytocin, because they don't, we don't have as much testosterone as you. You've got at least seven to eight times as much testosterone as me. And that buffers the effect of oxytocin, whereas I would get the full effect of oxytocin.

• 51:11Lewis Howes?

  That's fascinating. So a woman, when they have sex with a man, they're bonding quicker.

• 51:16Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 51:17Lewis Howes?

  When a man has sex with a woman, he's not necessarily bonding right away. He has to have more time connecting with her.

• 51:22Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 51:23Lewis Howes?

  Until he bonds.

• 51:24Dr. Tara Swart?

  Yeah.

• 51:25Lewis Howes?

  That is interesting.

• 51:26Dr. Tara Swart?

  And then sex will, then the oxytocin isn't as buffered by the testosterone. So when you've got the vasopressin and the oxytocin high, then the testosterone has less negating effect on it.

• 51:40Lewis Howes?

  This is fascinating. Okay. What else about neuroscience and relationships should we address since we're on this topic? That you think is really interesting?

• 51:51Dr. Tara Swart?

  So I think, you know, the whole like visual and smell thing at start is quite interesting. And then the receptors and hormones to do with bonding and sex is really interesting. I would say that because we live so much longer now, you know, we, we're using these cave analogies, but to be honest, in cave times, you and I would both be dead.

• 52:08Lewis Howes?

  Die at thirty, yeah.

• 52:11Dr. Tara Swart?

  So relationships potentially have to last for longer. And I think there's two things to say here. One is that you can use neuroplasticity to keep growing and changing in a way that keeps a relationship fresh.

• 52:27Dr. Tara Swart?

  If you are holding on to this fantasy that a relationship has to last forever, even if we're now living till we're a hundred, right? So I think another way to look at it is about being in the present, not necessarily putting this intense pressure on yourself, your partner and the relationship, that it has to last forever.

• 52:44Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 52:46Dr. Tara Swart?

  Understanding that even if a relationship breaks down, and that's obviously difficult to handle at the time, that there are potential possibilities for something that's more right for you at a different age than maybe a choice you made in your twenties.

• 53:03Dr. Tara Swart?

  So, you know, nothing, you don't have to be a neuroscientist to say those two things. It's kind of like just using your brain to understand that there's a certain amount of time. There are, you know, benefits to being in long lasting relationships, but there are possible alternatives as well.

• 53:23Speaker 04

  Yeah, that's interesting.

• 53:29Speaker 04

  How does someone start to believe something is possible when they've never created it for themselves? That's a beautiful question. How does somebody believe something is possible when they haven't created it for themselves? It's possible for me to make a million dollars, or possible for me to become financially free when I've never created it and I've always been broke. There's two ways to do that. Number one, people think that it's very difficult to get there and it's actually much easier. Your body is and your mind and your soul are very compliant. If you say something over and over again, and it's so simple, I don't want to over complicate spirituality. If you say something, a mantra, over and over again, even if you're faking it in the beginning, your body, your mind and your soul will comply with that vibration.

• 54:12Speaker 04

  And then you will do actions that will be closer to that vibration and they will reinforce each other. So what I do literally every day is I just ask myself, what is the highest vibration I need to get to? I see the delta of where I'm at now and where I need to get to. And I just keep hitting that point over and over and over again, incessantly, until all of me complies with it. And it happens every time. How do you hit that point when you're feeling depressed or depleted or down? That brings me to the second thing. Every single week, I try to find people who have already achieved what I'm trying to achieve and spend time with them, add value to them and serve them. Because Kabbalah explains there's a universal law. If you add value to someone or serve them in a way. That makes their life better.

• 54:56Speaker 04

  You draw from them their positive qualities, traits and vibration. So there's something that I want from Lewis. Meaning, what do I want? All I want from you is the consciousness you've already created. I want the vibration you've already achieved in your life. I want the real wisdom. Because wisdom and consciousness is the one thing I can take from you. That doesn't take away from you, but adds to you.

• 55:20Lewis Howes?

  That doesn't ask of me, it adds to me.

• 55:23Speaker 04

  It does, because if I become one more person that learns from you, the universe then replenishes you with even more wisdom and energy. So as you grow your audience, your wisdom increases because your audience craves more through you. And so the Creator bestows upon you much more wisdom and energy. And that's the value of growing your audience. And I'll tell people on social media, people are growing their audience because they think, well, that's how I monetize. Or that's how I become famous, and the ego gets in. The only intention you should have for growing your audience is you now have all these mini vessels which are craving your wisdom. So what happens is it forces the Creator to give you more wisdom and you become a greater channel. And that should be our intention for growing our audience.

• 56:04Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, how do I serve my community in a deeper way?

• 56:07Speaker 04

  Correct.

• 56:07Lewis Howes?

  It's all about service.

• 56:08Speaker 04

  It's all about the customer, all about service. And when you have that mindset, everything opens up and grows.

• 56:13Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, of course. What has been the thing that has blocked you in the last year the most?

• 56:22Lewis Howes?

  This is something you've been practicing for 20 plus years, 25 years roughly, these spiritual laws. But what's the thing that's still hard for you to break through? Or sometimes you forget and you have to be reminded with a painful lesson?

• 56:38Speaker 04

  That's a great question. One of the things I've learned is it doesn't matter how long you've been spiritual or you've been working on something or what your past experience has been. Every test you go through is sent to you by the universe that is exactly on your level. The challenge, your opponent is exactly equal to where you're at in order to get you to your next level. And the only reason the next level isn't comfortable is because it's not your current level. It's a level that you're not familiar with. So of course you don't see it, of course it's illogical, of course it's dark. And so what I've realized in this year, this has been probably one of my most transformational years, is that

• 57:24Speaker 04

  I am such a perfectionist. Sure, maybe you can relate.

• 57:29Lewis Howes?

  You look perfect, man. You got perfect hair. You got perfect outfit. And then he's like, put together, man. You look good.

• 57:34Speaker 04

  Oh, thank you. I am such a perfectionist that everything I do, I've always felt has to be the best. And this was the year I realized that part of why I'm trying to always be the best is I don't want to let other people down. I have to kind of give off this persona because I'm representing spirituality and I don't want to make spirituality look bad. So I have to have everything put together. I have to.

• 58:03Lewis Howes?

  Plus, you've got a big business. You want to make sure your employees, your team, your investors, whatever it might be, customers feel like you're credible as well.

• 58:11Speaker 04

  Correct.

• 58:11Lewis Howes?

  Correct. You're some sloppy human being walking around.

• 58:14Speaker 04

  Correct. I can't be sloppy externally or internally. But what I realized was that what that was causing was a lot of guilt and shame every time I fell short of the mark I needed to be at or the expectations I put on myself. And then what was happening was the guilt and the shame was creating much more negativity than all the things I was trying to perfect. So guilt and shame lowers your vibration more than any other mistake you make. People make mistakes like, I don't know, let's say you're in a relationship and you say something to your spouse or to your girlfriend or boyfriend that hurts them or upsets them and you feel bad about it. That was one moment in time where you created a little negative energy.

• 58:53Speaker 04

  But the guilt and shame that we carry after making a mistake is a million times the negative energy because it's constant. Every second you hold on to guilt and shame is another moment you're injecting negative energy. So the test isn't the mistake you make. It's the guilt and shame you have afterwards. So how do you remedy that? And this was my biggest lesson. It was taking the pressure off of myself of trying to appear as someone that's perfect and spiritual and allowing myself just to be myself everywhere I went. And I can't tell you, you know, how freeing that was, but at the same time, it created so much instability in other people because everyone's like, wait a minute, this was

• 59:36Speaker 04

  the David we knew and now what's this? I said, no, this is today, a little bit more of the real me. And now I'm actually building a new foundation in my life that's much more authentic to who I am.

• 59:50Speaker 04

  There are people whose approval I wanted so badly. And I would, I know, I mean, and look, I, I, I, I connected with your energy and I feel like we, we share so many similar qualities. I know exactly what somebody needs to hear to feel comfortable. Sure. I know what, what buttons to stay away from. I know how to talk to them in a way that can just make them feel really good and comfortable. And I learned that many times I'm killing myself or sacrificing myself, or I'm being inauthentic to just make them feel comfortable. So now I'm just learning to be me and still be a giver, but to be in the way that maybe makes them uncomfortable in the moment. But I'm being true to myself. And these examples have been happening more and more.

• 1:00:33Speaker 04

  It happens with my parents, happens with my friends, it happens with business partners and colleagues. I'm just learning to just show up as me versus who I think they want me to be. It's beautiful. What do you think people are getting wrong about manifestation today? What are people getting wrong about manifestation today?

• 1:00:55Speaker 04

  I think there's a prevailing belief system that we need to suffer to be successful. And that's incorrect. I think there's so much grind culture that's being thrown out there. And by the way, you do have to work hard and you do have to work consistently. But 99% of it is your belief system about what it takes to manifest. If you believe you must suffer to be successful, then that is the destiny you are creating. You will be successful, but you will only do it after you suffer. Elon Musk has the same hours in the day as we do. He thinks it's easy to colonize Mars. He thinks it's as easy to colonize Mars as we do, you know, maybe preparing a cup of coffee. Sure.

• 1:01:40Speaker 04

  Because he thinks it's easy to colonize Mars, that consciousness creates a vessel that draws in the right engineers, that draws in the right ideas, that draws in the right lawmakers to change the laws to satisfy him. Of course, there are challenges, but he's loving even the challenges to an extent where it all seems easy. If I think something is hard or impossible, then I literally call in the entire universe to create a movie for me that makes it hard and impossible. There are people who, every relationship they're in is a drama. It's difficult. It's hard. Every city I go to, I ask them, is dating hard in this city?

• 1:02:20Lewis Howes?

  They all say yes.

• 1:02:21Speaker 04

  They say, I say, which city is the hardest? They say, oh, my God, I'm in New York. It's so hard to date here. I'm sure it's easier in Los Angeles. People in Los Angeles say, it's impossible to date here. I'm sure it's easier in New York. Everyone always says it's harder wherever they're at. Why is that? Because.

• 1:02:37Lewis Howes?

  Because they haven't been successful yet in their own city.

• 1:02:39Speaker 04

  They haven't been successful in their own city. And if I say it's hard to date, then I don't have, it doesn't reflect poorly upon me the fact that I'm single. So I will tell everybody this narrative, it's hard to date, so that they don't judge me, and I don't judge myself, that I can't find a man.

• 1:02:59Lewis Howes?

  It's not me, it's everyone else.

• 1:03:00Speaker 04

  Everyone else, it's the city. It's the energy here. It's the, you know, everyone in L.A. is so superficial. But the truth is, even if everyone in L.A. was superficial, if you earned your soulmate, that one person would appear right at your door. Think about it, there are serial killers in prison who are married.

• 1:03:20Lewis Howes?

  Crazy. They found their soulmate, yeah.

• 1:03:22Speaker 04

  If someone in a maximum security prison, who has a reputation of a serial killer, can find their soulmate, I'm sure you can too in Los Angeles.

• 1:03:30Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah, it was millions of men or women here, exactly. It's funny, you just gotta know where to go. You just gotta try new things and you gotta change, you gotta transform on the inside out.

• 1:03:40Speaker 04

  Exactly what you just said. When your consciousness and belief systems and energy is in the right place, then you will be guided. Your legs will start moving in the right direction. Your, your profile on a dating app, algorithmically will change. People will feel your energy. People will find your profile at the right time and feel called to, to match with you. All of that comes from your vibration. I talk about products on a shelf, right? So one of the things that we talk about in our company is that the energy of the founders. So Mayruth and I, our consciousness, down to the executives, down to the directors, to the managers, and to the associates, all of us, our energy needs to be of such a high vibration,

• 1:04:24Speaker 04

  of an unlimited mindset, in order for energy to flow from the creator through us to the product. And then people feel that product on the shelf, and they don't know why they like it. They just say it's good branding, right? But they feel something in the bottle. And then that's what they should feel when they consume it, when they take it, and then the energy shifts. And here's the thing, in your company, if you have one person who's toxic, or you have one person who has a limited mindset, they are clogging the pipes of energy flowing down to the product level. So one of the things that I do, I have very little business experience, but from the spiritual side, I'm always checking in with the employees, where's their mindset at? I once went to my head of sales and I said, "Hey, in my walk this morning,"

• 1:05:07Speaker 04

  so every morning I walk and I talk out loud to the universe in the form of prayer. Prayer is just a technology to expand your vessel. People think prayer is something you do to bribe God, to make you more comfortable. But there's no bribing God. God is a perfect force. Prayer is a technology to transform our vessel, to increase the frequency to allow more energy in. So every morning I'll talk out loud to the universe. And what's the best way to pray for miracles or abundance in our life? Any way that makes you comfortable. The way I do it is I walk and I talk out loud in the morning before everyone's awake. Some people like to be still. Some people like to do it in their head. I like to talk out loud. Something very powerful about it. In the first five minutes of prayer, all of these negative forces will attack you

• 1:05:52Speaker 04

  to try to distract you not to do it. And you'll think it's not working. You'll want to get to your phone, and you'll want to quit. I always say you got to go past the first five minutes, and then you break through kind of a miracle zone. And then when you talk out loud to the universe, your words become a vessel for energy to come in. And so ideas, my best ideas, best product ideas, have come on these walks. And I will talk out loud and these ideas will come. And I had an idea and a vision for a revenue number for my head of sales. I went to him, this guy's got 40 years' experience. I said, "Hey, I think we can get," whatever it was, "100 products into Whole Foods." This was right when we first got into Whole Foods. 100 SKUs? 100 SKUs. Holy cow. How many SKUs? We had 100. Oh, wow. I said, "I think we can get all 100." Today, we have about 300. But I said we can get all 100 into Whole Foods.

• 1:06:36Speaker 04

  And he looked at me, he started laughing. He's like, you know, forty years experience. I said, we need to aim for two this year to get into Whole Foods. And that's how it works. And we can get to four next year, whatever.

• 1:06:46Lewis Howes?

  And I said, that's a limiting belief, though.

• 1:06:48Speaker 04

  Based on statistics and history, which is what most people use.

• 1:06:51Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:52Speaker 04

  To form their belief systems.

• 1:06:53Lewis Howes?

  Most people aren't going to Mars also based on history.

• 1:06:55Speaker 04

  Exactly. The people who are changing this world are people who are not looking at history as a way to force their belief systems. They're looking at something bigger, more divine, which is endless. And they're drawing these belief systems from a higher place. So I said, look, you have the experience, I don't. But as a founder, you know, in the last eight years, we've been doing this together. As a founder, I do get ideas and thankfully, you know, we do control this company. So I want you to really be open to this idea. And we had this back and forth. I said, no, it's impossible. I said, I said to him, I said, listen, I want you just to be open to it. He's like, okay, we'll be open to it. Something happened on a call at Whole Foods and they said, like, one of their brands wasn't doing well. Manufacturing started to like malfunction and like a whole shelf became open.

• 1:07:41Speaker 04

  Low and behold, that year, I think we got seventy-five products.

• 1:07:43Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 1:07:44Speaker 04

  Never happened before in the history of Whole Foods. We shot up to be like one of their number one brands. And I think today we're at almost like a hundred twenty or a hundred thirty, like somewhere up there. And this all happened in one year. And every year I'd go back to the team and I say, guys, and this happens at every department. Remember what we thought could happen. Remember what we saw visually. And if we saw it and we feel it, it means it exists and we have to be open to it. At the very minimum, I need you to be open to it.

• 1:08:13Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, I love the, the question I like when I present this to someone is, in a world of possibilities, if this was possible, what would need to happen?

• 1:08:22Speaker 04

  Beautiful.

• 1:08:22Lewis Howes?

  In a world of possibilities, if it was possible for us to get a hundred SKUs in Whole Foods, what would need to happen?

• 1:08:28Speaker 04

  You just opened up their mind to bypass their old limited belief system. That's a great way of framing it.

• 1:08:33Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:34Speaker 04

  I love that. I love that.

• 1:08:35Lewis Howes?

  Wow. So you got seventy-five SKUs in in one year. Yeah. When you had like a couple before then or something, right?

• 1:08:41Speaker 04

  Yep. Yep.

• 1:08:43Lewis Howes?

  And you also said that, something you said earlier, you said you were, made a million dollars at fifteen, is that right?

• 1:08:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:08:48Lewis Howes?

  But then you were kind of broke for fifteen years?

• 1:08:50Speaker 04

  So I made all this money in the stock market early on, because I was just, I had a lot of desire, a lot of energy, I just didn't know where to put it. And so I started to trade, and it started to do really well. But that's when my life started to get out of control as a teenager. And I became a gambler, I started to-

• 1:09:05Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 1:09:06Speaker 04

  Oh yeah, I started playing poker eight hours a day.

• 1:09:08Lewis Howes?

  Oh man, I did that back in-

• 1:09:09Speaker 04

  Oh yeah.

• 1:09:10Lewis Howes?

  Ten years too, at college, just like poker until four AM.

• 1:09:13Speaker 04

  Till four AM, sometimes I'd go in, I'd go into a casino on like a Sunday and come out on a Tuesday.

• 1:09:18Lewis Howes?

  Oh man.

• 1:09:18Speaker 04

  And you wouldn't see daylight.

• 1:09:19Lewis Howes?

  I was like, playing like fifteen dollar hands with like college buddies, not casino life, but yeah.

• 1:09:24Speaker 04

  But that, I mean, it's never enough, so casino life was the next thing, right? And so I was doing that, and I realized, why am I like, I just kept feeling more and more drained, right? You got the highs and then you feel low. And once I started to learn Kabbalah, I started to realize that the highs and the lows were, I was drawing energy, but I didn't create the vessel to hold this energy. Gambling, drugs, alcohol, sex, all of these things draw energy. You're drawing God, you're drawing the universal force of creation. The reason why it ends up causing chaos is there's no vessel to hold this energy, so you short circuit. And what does a short circuit look like? There's a flash of light, and then there's darkness.

• 1:10:08Speaker 04

  But the flash is very bright. That flash is very addictive. So, most people, they draw energy, but there's no vessel to hold it, which we can explain what that means, the creative vessel. There's no vessel to hold it. They feel this flash, and then there's darkness, there's emptiness, there's addiction. Because they may not know spiritual laws, they'll go right back to more flashes to feed the addiction.

• 1:10:37Lewis Howes?

  So it sounds like there's a, almost a three-step process, is what I'm seeing. Number one, learn to draw the energy you want to you. Number two, create the vessel within you so that you can hold it. And I'm assuming number three is where to bring that energy, how to be of service with that energy, and then just continue to draw, have a container big enough to hold it, and then pour it out into others. Is that a?

• 1:11:05Speaker 04

  That's a beautiful way of putting it. So.

• 1:11:07Lewis Howes?

  So how do we first draw energy to us of the things we want to manifest more?

• 1:11:13Speaker 04

  The way we draw energy to us is first to be clear about your belief system of what you deserve to receive and what you're meant to receive.

• 1:11:25Lewis Howes?

  How do you get clear on what you deserve and are meant to receive?

• 1:11:29Speaker 04

  Whatever your desires are, it means you are meant to receive them at some point. Don't question that. So if you actually had to write down all your desires, these desires, the Creator gave you these desires, you go out and manifest them.

• 1:11:43Lewis Howes?

  What's the difference between a desire and a temptation? Because you could be like, ah, what else? I'm just like crazy, crazy drugs, and I don't know, just like stuff that's not a spiritual energy, but I, what if it's the desire? I feel like it's a desire. I'm supposed to go drink all night and gamble all night and just whatever.

• 1:12:02Speaker 04

  Correct. So this is why it's helpful, but I say, all of these things that are given to us, drinking, gambling, drugs, sex, these are all, for example, uh, let's say if you go to Costco, Costco has samples, and you eat a sample, and you like the sample, but if you like the sample, you need to go buy the full product. Nobody goes to Costco all day long and just eat samples. You don't just sit by the sample station all day long to fill your belly with the samples that they give you. Well, if you're poor, I've done that when I was broke. Yeah. So I got the only people who will just eat samples all the time. So when a person does a drug, what do they feel like? They feel like God. Feel this euphoria. This is a sample.

• 1:12:44Lewis Howes?

  To eventually inspire you to buy the full product.

• 1:12:46Speaker 04

  The full product is to realize you can feel that.

• 1:12:50Lewis Howes?

  Without.

• 1:12:50Speaker 04

  Unlock the power of your soul.

• 1:12:51Lewis Howes?

  Without the drug.

• 1:12:52Speaker 04

  Without the drug.

• 1:12:53Lewis Howes?

  But most people think the drug is the power to unlock more. And so they need to keep.

• 1:12:59Speaker 04

  Going back to.

• 1:13:00Lewis Howes?

  Doing the plant medicine or the drugs that create the awakening, the awareness to then feel, heal, see, do things differently. As opposed to creating from within, right?

• 1:13:12Speaker 04

  Because they, because no one's told them that they have the power inside of them. That is nuclear. You have this power inside of you that is millions of times greater than any drug you're taking. But we've been told that we need to keep taking the drug to feel that way.

• 1:13:27Lewis Howes?

  But anyone that I've talked to who's done the plant medicines, they're like, no, nothing is greater than this. This is the, this unlocks more than anything I could ever do on my own.

• 1:13:36Speaker 04

  And it's true, it has unlocked more than they've ever experienced. So I don't ever tell people, don't do this plant, don't do this drug. When people tell me, I love sex, I'm having sex with everybody, is there a problem with that? I said, that's fine, you can have sex with everybody you want, you can have all the drugs you want. I have, but I do want you to know that you have something greater inside of you that will give you even more pleasure and more euphoria. If you're open to it, we can talk.

• 1:14:01Lewis Howes?

  And also, if you're doing the drugs or the alcohol or the sex or the addiction things that create this energy feeling, what does that do to your vessel?

• 1:14:11Speaker 04

  See, that's the thing. You actually begin to shrink the vessel. How do we know? Because every time you take the drug, it's never as potent the next time.

• 1:14:19Lewis Howes?

  You need more.

• 1:14:19Speaker 04

  You need more.

• 1:14:20Lewis Howes?

  More frequently.

• 1:14:21Speaker 04

  You need it more frequently. So you actually begin to shrink your capacity until you experience death. And then there's some kind of death or painful scenario that breaks your vessel open again. And then you start that process over. The only way to really expand your vessel spiritually.

• 1:14:39James Doty?

  Is a concept, is a spiritual law that is certainty beyond logic.

• 1:14:42Lewis Howes?

  Hmm hmm.

• 1:14:43James Doty?

  You have to be put in a dark situation, a difficult situation, where you do not see any logical way of getting out of it, and then choose to have certainty that you can,

• 1:14:55Lewis Howes?

  not.

• 1:14:55James Doty?

  Even if you have to fake that certainty. But you have certainty beyond your logical mind. This breaks open the vessel and allows the next level of your soul to come in to hold this energy.

• 1:15:06Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, and what you said about, you've said this about certainty. Certainty is the way to guarantee a positive outcome. As long as you have complete certainty beyond logic, that everything is good and will be good, you are guaranteed to have the outcome be good.

• 1:15:20James Doty?

  Absolutely.

• 1:15:26Lewis Howes?

  What is the, the number one thought and number one emotion that blocks us from the ability to manifest greater?

• 1:15:34James Doty?

  Fear.

• 1:15:37Lewis Howes?

  What type of fear?

• 1:15:38James Doty?

  Well, it's insecurity, it's shame. And it's, this results in you limiting your beliefs.

• 1:15:47James Doty?

  And so, in some ways, what we're talking about here actually is a decision between fear and love.

• 1:15:55Lewis Howes?

  Hmm hmm.

• 1:15:56James Doty?

  Right? And when you're fearful, this stimulates your sympathetic nervous system with all the negative aspects of it. When you love, you're open, you're generous, you're thoughtful, you're kind, because you've engaged the parasympathetic nervous system. And you have a choice. This is like, if you look at Stoic philosophers, like somebody like Epictetus, who was a slave. He says, "I cannot control my external environment. What I can control is how I react to my environment." Right? So, you meet people, I'm sure, who say, "My life's miserable, my life's horrible." While you meet other people who go, "Well, it's tough right now, but I'm, you know, optimistic it's gonna get better." Or, "I know if I do this, it's gonna get better."

• 1:16:41James Doty?

  These are completely oppositional attitudes that have a profound, profound effect, depending on what you're believing.

• 1:16:49Lewis Howes?

  Yes. But how does someone shift their attitude into positive when they're in a suffering state? And they feel like they're a victim to so many different things happening to them?

• 1:16:59James Doty?

  Sure. Well... I can't sit here and say, "You do this and your life's gonna be perfect." There are some situations, either because of, as an example, structural racism that's built into the system. Or chronic poverty, because throughout the world, and even in America, the ability to overcome poverty,

• 1:17:22James Doty?

  for most, it's highly unlikely that's going to happen. So, yes, you do have power, but it's not necessarily, "I'm gonna change it and everything's gonna be perfect for me." And I'm sure things are not perfect for you, right? Yeah. And no matter how much you try or want, well, externally, things may look fantastic. It's not perfect. Sure. And it's not the way you necessarily want. And I have to say the same thing. But there are people who, yeah, no matter how hard they're gonna work, it's gonna be very challenging. That being said, what we do know is, there are certain practices and rules, and if you are going to get out of something, or if you are going to change things,

• 1:18:07James Doty?

  then the best way to do that, which has the highest likelihood of success, is to go through some of the things that we're talking about here. And one of those is that, as an example, there is a tendency for

• 1:18:25James Doty?

  us to want to achieve, right? And if you're an athlete, you have a goal you set there. Well, goals are fine, but if you focus only on the goal and have no concern about any of the other things that are going on. The process. Yeah, then you reach the goal and there's nothing there. Yeah. Yet, what we do know, the greatest cause of suffering is what? It's attachment and craving. Desires. Yeah, yeah. And the thing is, when that is your absolute focus, and we can't all get these things, you're gonna be highly disappointed,

• 1:19:06James Doty?

  and you've ignored all the people in your life as you focus solely on that. And unfortunately, many people learn that lesson far along after they've destroyed their families, they've been through multiple marriages, their kids don't like them. Right?

• 1:19:22Lewis Howes?

  Because they've been chasing a result, or a goal, or a dream, but neglecting everything else.

• 1:19:27James Doty?

  Yeah, because again, as I was saying even about myself, I thought, well, if I just do this, you know, my shame and insecurity will go away. I'll be loved by everybody, and my life will be perfect. Yet, at every one of those peaks, all I had was disappointment. And while everyone told me life was great, I did not feel that inside. Because I had not understood that I was the only one who had the key to the self-created prison. And until you realize that, you're on a very difficult path.

• 1:19:58Lewis Howes?

  So if we're coming from a place of insecurity, fear, or lack, and we're saying, you know what? I want to manifest. I want to create more for myself. I want to have more money. I want to have more opportunities, accomplishments, success. And that's what I want. I desire these things. And I start to apply some of the practices of manifesting and creating more abundance in my life. But if I create those external results, and I haven't shifted the insecurities or the shame, what happens next?

• 1:20:32James Doty?

  Well, you end up the way I did, which is you have everything and you're incredibly unhappy.

• 1:20:37Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, so you can still manifest and attract what you want, and create what you want, and accomplish goals, but it's not going to make you feel different about yourself. It actually makes you feel worse.

• 1:20:48James Doty?

  Exactly.

• 1:20:52Lewis Howes?

  I hope you enjoyed this powerful masterclass on manifestation. I wish I had this episode five years ago, 10 years ago, heck, one month ago. I got the chance to sit down with all these incredible people. Dr. Joe Dispenza many times, the neuroscientist Dr. Tara Swart, David Guim, who brings spiritual... Wisdom to the World and Dr. James Doty, all about manifestation and really creating abundance in your life. And each one of these episodes was so powerful. And so we wanted to bring these key moments all in one episode for you. And these were some of the biggest guests of the year that we had on. And so we wanted to make it this powerful masterclass

• 1:21:35Lewis Howes?

  for you. If you enjoyed this, do me a favor. It would mean a lot to me if you just click the follow button over on Apple or Spotify, wherever you're listening to this audio podcast, click on the follow button and leave a review. It will really help us get this message out to more people. And the more you can share this with your friends, the more we can inspire and impact others to create a meaningful life that they want and desire. So please share the link to a couple of friends and ask them what their biggest takeaway was from this episode as well. And again, I want to remind you, if no one's told you lately that 2025 has the potential to be the biggest year of your life, but not because you say it's going to be, not because you've gone through challenges this last year and you

• 1:22:20Lewis Howes?

  deserve it now. It's going to be because you intended to happen and you show up every single day with that intention by following through with a commitment to consistency. And these are just some of the philosophies and principles that can support you from this episode. But you need the accountability. You need to show up and constantly be a learner. They say learners are earners. If you're showing up and listening to the podcast every single week, it's going to support you. We are here to guide you. My mission is to bring you the top minds in the world, the most inspiring people in the world, so they can share their research, their science, their stories to give you that accountability. Learners

• 1:23:02Lewis Howes?

  are earners. Also, I want to make sure that you are financially setting yourself up for success, not only externally by making a lot of money, but internally by feeling good about the money you have, the money that's coming and going in your life as well. And if you haven't pre-ordered a copy of my new book, Make Money Easy, it's all about creating a rich and abundant Then go to makemoneeasibook.com right now. And when you buy a copy, you'll be entered into a money mastermind live masterclass training that I'm going to be doing live. Make sure to go to makemoneeasibook.com. Get a copy. All you have to do is submit a receipt. You can get over on Amazon or wherever you buy books.

• 1:23:45Lewis Howes?

  You submit a receipt and you'll get in my live masterclass on making money and the mindset you need to really accelerate this financial opportunity for you in 2025 and beyond. So go to makemoneeasibook.com. Get your copy today. Share this link with a friend that you care about, that you want to see succeed, that you want to see thrive. And if someone sent you this link and they cared enough about you to send you this link and you're listening to this right now, send them a text, FaceTime them, give them a hug the next time you see them and say, thank you so much for caring about me and wanting to see me succeed and win. 2025 is your year, my friend, and I'm excited to be here along your journey to support

• 1:24:30Lewis Howes?

  you in accomplishing all of your goals and helping you get back up when you fall down. We are here to support you. I want to see you win. You deserve it, but you've got to be the one to show up every single day and be consistent and manifesting your dreams. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well.

• 1:25:14Lewis Howes?

  Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you, if no one has told you lately, that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.