1027. Q&AF: Building Long-Term Goals, Scaling Without Losing Your Mind & You're On Your Own

On today's episode, Andy answers your questions on how to effectively plan for goals that are 10+ years in the future, how to handle the pressure of scaling when your employees and their families depend on it, and how to shift your mindset when you realize no one is coming to save you.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:17Andy Frisella?

  What is up guys? It's Andy Frisella and this is the show for the realists. Say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society. And welcome to motherfucking reality guys. Today we have Q and A. That is where you submit the questions and we give you the answers. Now you could submit your questions a bunch of different ways. DJ's gonna tell you how.

• 0:35Speaker 01

  Guys, you can email your questions in to [email protected]. You can also click the link in the description right here and submit them online, or you can just drop them in the comments and the Q and A videos on the tube.

• 0:48Andy Frisella?

  Other times, we're gonna have shows within the show. Tomorrow, we're gonna have Cruise the Internet. We call that CTI. That's where we put topics on the screen, current events, we speculate on what's really going on, and we talk about how we, the people, have to solve these problems going on. Other times, we're gonna have Real Talk. Real Talk's just five, 20 minutes and we giving you some real talk. And then occasionally, we're going to have 75 Hard Verses. That is where a person who has completed 75 Hard comes on the show, talks about how they were before, how they are now, and how they use 75 Hard to take back control of their life. If you're unfamiliar with 75 Hard, it is the initial phase of the Live Hard program, which is the world's most popular mental transformation program in

• 1:30Andy Frisella?

  history. You can get that entire program for free at episode 208 on the audio feed. Again, that's 208 on the audio feed only. Or you can go to andyfrisella.com and buy the book on mental toughness. It has the entire Live Hard program and a whole bunch of other info that's not on that free episode. If you're somebody who likes the ins and outs and the nuts and bolts and all the details, that's the, that's the way to go. Obviously, it's not free, but it is more in-depth. Let's see, we are the biggest show in the world that doesn't run ads. That is a fact. Alright. The reason we don't run ads is because I do not want to be told what I can and can't say. Ever. So.

• 2:15Andy Frisella?

  I'll make a little deal with you guys. It goes like this. If you like the show, if it makes you laugh, it makes you think, if it's something of value. Realize that the only way our show grows, because we don't have a big network behind us and we don't have a big ad campaign, it only grows through word of mouth. And, uh, we just ask very simply that if you enjoy the show, the specific episode, share that bitch out. Alright? So, don't be a hoe.

• 2:40Speaker 01

  Share the show.

• 2:41Andy Frisella?

  Alright.

• 2:42Speaker 01

  Dish episode.

• 2:43Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, I mean, some people think they could share one for the whole year and they've done their little deal. Like, that's not the deal, man. The deal is every episode.

• 2:51Speaker 01

  If, if it gives you value.

• 2:52Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, if you think it sucks, fucking, don't share it.

• 2:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:56Andy Frisella?

  But they never suck.

• 2:57Speaker 01

  They don't suck. Yeah, that's right, man. What's going on, dog?

• 3:01Andy Frisella?

  Nothing, dude.

• 3:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, I got a little, uh, you know, I know we can't really talk about it, but I have some shit. I got some drink in my cup.

• 3:08Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 3:09Speaker 01

  Gas.

• 3:11Andy Frisella?

  It's my favorite drink we've had so far.

• 3:13Speaker 01

  Absolute gas.

• 3:14Andy Frisella?

  Yeah. Yep. It's, uh...

• 3:17Speaker 01

  Let's just tell them what it is.

• 3:19Andy Frisella?

  Nah, I can't.

• 3:19Speaker 01

  No, no, I'm saying like we just beep it, you know what I'm saying?

• 3:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, dude, this is fucking gas.

• 3:26Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, it is.

• 3:27Speaker 01

  Like, this is my summer drink.

• 3:28Andy Frisella?

  No doubt.

• 3:29Speaker 01

  Like, drank. Like, not drink. It's a drank.

• 3:32Andy Frisella?

  And. What do you call it, though? Cause like, you're used to calling it like, purple.

• 3:38Speaker 01

  It's pink.

• 3:39Andy Frisella?

  Give me some of the red.

• 3:40Speaker 01

  It's pink.

• 3:40Andy Frisella?

  No, but it's clear.

• 3:43Andy Frisella?

  It's what you say.

• 3:45Andy Frisella?

  You guys, you're gonna be confused.

• 3:46Speaker 01

  Just the drink, dog.

• 3:47Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 3:47Speaker 01

  Just simply a drink.

• 3:48Andy Frisella?

  Give me the drank.

• 3:49Speaker 01

  I want the drank.

• 3:50Andy Frisella?

  Alright.

• 3:50Speaker 01

  You know what I'm saying?

• 3:51Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 3:51Speaker 01

  Now, the yellow drink's good, too.

• 3:53Andy Frisella?

  The yellow is good.

• 3:54Speaker 01

  Bro, I'll drink the yellow juice all day long.

• 3:56Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 3:58Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, and then that one, golden shower.

• 4:00Speaker 01

  That kinda sounded like I'll drink urine, didn't it?

• 4:06Speaker 01

  Well, enough of that. It's time to get better today.

• 4:10Andy Frisella?

  That is good though, isn't it?

• 4:11Speaker 01

  Bro, it's fucking gas.

• 4:12Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 4:12Speaker 01

  It's absolute gas.

• 4:13Andy Frisella?

  I know.

• 4:13Speaker 01

  Dude, fuck.

• 4:14Andy Frisella?

  I'm excited, dude.

• 4:15Speaker 01

  You know, just when I think, you know.

• 4:18Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 4:18Speaker 01

  It's there.

• 4:19Andy Frisella?

  Remember, we're still learning.

• 4:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:21Andy Frisella?

  We're still learning.

• 4:22Speaker 01

  Yeah. Dude, perspective is a powerful fucking thing, isn't it?

• 4:25Andy Frisella?

  Yeah.

• 4:26Speaker 01

  You know what I'm saying? Like, like.

• 4:27Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, you could see things, uh, many different ways. It's the exact same thing. And I think that how you choose to see anything is really going to up, uh, be responsible and dictate the quality of your life.

• 4:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:39Andy Frisella?

  Or the quality of your products.

• 4:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. Or how shit your life is.

• 4:42Andy Frisella?

  Right.

• 4:43Speaker 01

  100% dude. Absolutely, man. Well, guys, it's Q and A F. We got three good ones for you, bro.

• 4:49Andy Frisella?

  Cool.

• 4:50Speaker 01

  Let's get better, guys. Uh, Andy, question number one. Andy! With an exclamation point. Um, Andy, I'm a 23-year-old female medical student with a very clear vision for my life. I often feel misunderstood by my family and those around me because many people deem the goals I've already set and achieved as impossible. Um, I was and still am often ridiculed with people telling me I won't make it anyway. My long-term goal is to immigrate, which is why I choose a field like medicine, uh, that isn't tied to a specific country.

• 5:27Speaker 01

  Um, I'm already learning the language and immersing myself in the culture. I'm seeking advice on how to effectively build a foundation for long arc goals that span a decade or more. My question is, what is the best way to lay the groundwork for goals that are still far off? 10 years more in the future. How do you do that?

• 5:48Andy Frisella?

  Well, look, first of all, goals that took 10 years, 10 years ago now take three years or four years because of the different technologies that we have. So it's hard to put a timeframe because of the evolution and the speed at which technology is changing in the world. My 10-year goals, when I started in 1999, that was a much different.

• 6:11Andy Frisella?

  Amount of ground to cover than a 10 year goal now, and which is really great for you guys. You know, we have a lot of talk about, you know, how hard it is to succeed and all these things, but it's always been hard. And I would honestly trade places with any of you at this current time, even considering what's going on in the world, to be 20 years old again, and have the ability to cover way more ground in a much shorter period of time. Yeah. So let's be careful about how much we think we can accomplish in 10 years, because it's probably a whole lot more than you think at this point in time, because that ability to accelerate is only going to get more and more and more. So that's the first thing. The second thing is,

• 6:54Andy Frisella?

  in order to achieve any goals, you have to understand that you are going into a battle. Okay, a metaphorical battle. And you cannot go into the battle with bad tools and bad weapons. If I, if we were in a real battle and I sent you out there against people who were, you know, had rocket launchers and machine guns, and I gave you a little buck knife, you're going to get killed. All right, you're not going to be successful, no matter what you do, no matter how tough you are, no matter, it doesn't matter, the tools that they have are better than the tools that you have. And for that reason, you don't have a chance. So we have to understand that our mind and our body is the tool.

• 7:40Andy Frisella?

  That is our weapon system. That is what allows us to accomplish the goals that we're going to accomplish. And far too many people don't realize this. They don't realize that if you're not finely tuned and you're not training your mind and you're not holding yourself into the best possible condition, you are in a situation where you are at a disadvantage against people who are. So how should you look at this? Well, the number one reason that most people can't achieve their goals isn't because they don't know how to achieve them. It's because they lack the ability to adhere to the steps of achieving the goal for a long enough period of time for those things to materialize. So you have to be able to cultivate.

• 8:26Andy Frisella?

  And understand that the skills of resilience and fortitude and grit and mental toughness and the ability to endure and the ability to adhere. These are the things that number one, give you the confidence to achieve these goals. But number two, give you the very practical ability to follow a plan for much longer than you might be excited about following it. All right. So this is the purpose of the live hard and the 75 hard lifestyle. A lot of people don't understand that 75 hard and live hard are to be completed every single year. This is a lifestyle.

• 9:08Andy Frisella?

  This is not a one hit fix it type thing. These skill sets that I just mentioned grit, fortitude, mental toughness, discipline, the ability to endure resilience, all these things, they have to be trained all the time because they're perishable. It's no different than any other perishable skill. If you want to learn how to play the guitar and you get pretty decent at guitar and you stop for a year, you're not going to be as good. If you stop for five years, you're going to be starting over. These are things that you have to understand about your own tools, your, your mind, your body.

• 9:47Andy Frisella?

  So learning that at a young age, because you're very young and being able to be conscious of that and become aware of that and keep that finely tuned will give you the ability to adhere to your plan much longer at a much higher level than everybody else. That is a huge advantage because 98% of people, they quit the minute that it becomes inconvenient. The minute that something happens that they don't like, or the minute that they get bored with it, they're saying, you know, I've done a lot of reflection and I've realized that this just isn't for me. Well, listen dude, nothing's going to be for you because every single thing that you could possibly

• 10:32Andy Frisella?

  choose on the entire planet to do is going to get boring and it's going to get monotonous and it's going to get to a place where you don't feel like doing it. And if you don't have the ability to push through those times, you cannot get there. If you start over every single time, something starts to feel boring or monotonous or not exciting, you're never going to get to the place you're trying to get. And this is the mistake that most people make. Most people start a thing, they have this amazing energy, quote unquote motivation. They let that motivation drive them to the point where it's no longer exciting, the motivation fades, they lose the

• 11:11Andy Frisella?

  fuel to move down the path. You have to operate on a, on a different understanding is that the real progress in life is not made when you're motivated. The real progress in life is made when you'd rather do anything else and you still do what it is you're trying to do at a high level. That is the separator between those who do and those who don't. And if you can develop that and you can keep that in mind and you can keep that finely tuned, you will be at a massive advantage over everybody else. So that is the second thing. Understand, you have to control what you control. You have to always finely tune your mind. You have to keep your body in the best shape that it can be because these are your tools, your weapons that you're using

• 11:55Andy Frisella?

  to fight the life resistance that comes your way when you are an ambitious person. Okay. And number three, you need to get very specific. Okay. I want to do this and you break it down backwards into daily critical tasks that have to be done every single day that will eventually lead you to there. And guess what? I've built a piece of technology that actually does this for you. If you go to operator standard and get on the waitlist because we're still in beta and we're still in the, the MVP mode, we are going to open that up very soon. Go get on the waitlist for operator standard, go on my website, join the waitlist. And when this launches, there's,

• 12:37Andy Frisella?

  there's thousands of people in there already. They took advantage of jumping into it in December. And they've done an amazing job helping us find the holes and figure out what needs to be and how to do. But this technology is amazing because what it actually does. Is you get to tell it what you're trying to do and it breaks down the critical task all the way down to today that helps you get to where you're trying to go. So you're not questioning what you actually need to do.

• 13:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, it takes that vagueness.

• 13:05Andy Frisella?

  That's just one of the things it does. This, this thing is like fucking Jarvis for winners. Okay. I can't even tell you all the shit that's gonna come out with it and what we're working on, but that it does that now. So um, you can either do that yourself or you can get that and fucking use that. And so those are the three things that you have to do.

• 13:29Speaker 01

  Let me ask you this, Andy, because I know, like I said, man, we, we talk, you know, oftentimes outside of this, just life shit, you know, and I remember asking, this was years ago, dude, I asked him, I'm like, you know, did you know that you would be where you are today? And your answer, because you know, most people are like, oh, no, I didn't know. I just, you know, no, you're like, no, this is what I expected.

• 13:48Andy Frisella?

  That's right.

• 13:48Speaker 01

  Right? And, and I think, I guess my question is, and it may not even be the right word, but in 1999, 19 year old Andy, was there like a level of like blind confidence at that time? Like, you know what I'm saying?

• 14:02Andy Frisella?

  So it's, so the answer is yes and no. Okay. Did I know we would be here specifically? Not exactly. Did I know that I would be in a position where I was winning? Yes.

• 14:15Speaker 01

  On an undeniable.

• 14:15Andy Frisella?

  Undeniable winning. Yes. I expected that. That was not ever a doubt in my mind. I just kept moving and that is like what faith is about, right?

• 14:24Speaker 01

  Right, right. Yeah, I said blind confidence.

• 14:26Andy Frisella?

  Well, look, dude, the work's always gonna come before the belief. All right? People think that when they start out, they have to have this amazing belief in their ability to accomplish things. And because they don't, they think there's something wrong with them, but they've got the, the order of operations backwards. Okay? The truth of the matter is, is the only way that you start believing that you're actually gonna get there, like truly believing it. Like you said, at the, at the beginning, you're like, I want to be there. That's where I want to be.

• 14:55Speaker 01

  I would like to be there.

• 14:56Andy Frisella?

  Yes. And, and because people lack confidence, which goes back to the Live Hard program.

• 15:03Andy Frisella?

  They, they, they say, man, I don't really believe that. And what happens is that freezes them up in the beginning and they're not realizing that you have to go and you have to do some of the work and you've got to do the work for a considerable amount of time, not a month, not three months, not six months, not a year. We're talking years. Okay. And eventually you get to a point where it starts to produce results and you're like, oh shit. Okay. This makes sense. I work. I see some results. I get some more belief. Okay. And when that cycle happens two or three times where you start to really learn that your inputs equal a certain output. Now confidence isn't a problem because you understand what the game is about. So

• 15:47Andy Frisella?

  the, the reality is, is you have to do the work blindly. The best that you can, and by the way, we have incredible tools, like we talked about in the operator standard. That will help you understand the things you should do when you may not know what to do. And as long as you do them, and then they start to produce results, you learn that confidence. And that's where the expectation comes in. So once you get to a point where you've, you know, you've put the ingredients in, you've baked the cake, the cake comes out is pretty good. You've put the ingredients in, you baked another cake, the cake comes out pretty good. You put the ingredients, you, you bake another cake, the cake comes out better and you continue that process. It doesn't take that long before you figure out like, fuck dude, I can do this and this is great.

• 16:32Andy Frisella?

  So now you know what it takes to actually move forward and you're in a position to move forward with confidence, understanding that you now expect to be successful. You're not hoping or wishing or doubting it, right? You understand that if I put this work in, it will produce this result. And that's a very freeing feeling because it removes the things like doubt. It removes the things like uncertainty. It removes the lack of confidence and now you understand that is, is simply inputs and outputs. And that's what we have to understand. Dude, expecting to win is completely different than hoping to win. Okay. Hoping to win is, man.

• 17:17Andy Frisella?

  You know, maybe if I do some of this work, a lucky break will happen. I'll meet someone, something will happen, people will like it. I'll go viral, I'll do this, I'll do that. That's hope. Expecting is, I'm going to do whatever the fuck it takes, no matter what, to produce this result. And that result is going to fucking happen. And I don't give a shit if the fucking world ends. That result is still gonna fucking happen. That's a different thing. Okay, totally different thing. And the only people who actually win are the people who eventually get to a point where they expect it. But you've got to build that part by doing the work, not really understanding, until you see the results a few times to gain that confidence of expectation.

• 18:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's like, it's like the hockey stick you talk about. You're gonna go for a minute without seeing anything. No, no fruits at all.

• 18:06Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, yeah. Most people will quit. I mean, dude, look, man. Most people are quitting their goal in six months. Like, nothing happens in six months. Okay, and, and that was not, that's not a new thing, by the way. I mean, we could blame the internet and say, oh yeah, it's all these influencers.

• 18:23Speaker 01

  Times are changing.

• 18:25Andy Frisella?

  It, it's more in your face now. But even when you were younger, even when I, I was younger, that's the same way people operated. Okay, they operated from a place of relying completely on their motivation and not on pushing past the point where the motivation fades. Or working until something bad happens and then saying, oh, well, something bad happened to me. And that's the story they tell for their whole life. You have to keep going through those things. And if you don't, you just have to accept that you're not going to ever become what it is you're going to become. What most people do their entire lives is they go for one or two or three years, and the thing doesn't work out. And they say, oh, this isn't for

• 19:07Andy Frisella?

  me. I'm gonna try something else. They go to the new thing. One, two, three years, it doesn't work out. They did repeat the process. And before you know it, you've done that six times and it's taken you fucking, you know, 18 years of your life. You're 38 years old and you don't know what the fuck you're gonna do with your life. That is the danger of not pushing through.

• 19:28Andy Frisella?

  The monotony of achieving anything and there's not a single person on the planet. I don't care if it's Elon Musk. I don't care if it's Bezos. I don't care if it's Michael Jordan. I don't care if it's Tom Brady. They're every single person, these people, they are experts at doing the work diligently at a high level after the excitement fades. That's where things are really produced. You're not even producing anything before the excitement fades. Like, yeah.

• 20:02Speaker 01

  Brother, that's crazy to think about, dude. Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Well, once the new car smell wears off, what are you doing then?

• 20:10Andy Frisella?

  Oh, I'm gonna get a new car.

• 20:11Speaker 01

  That's right. Yeah. Dude, that's wild.

• 20:15Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, that's how people think.

• 20:16Speaker 01

  Fuck, man. I love it, man. Let's keep moving, guys. Guys, Andy, question number two. Andy, I own a small roofing company in Iowa. For the first few years, it was exciting because everything felt like growth. I've hired eight more guys full-time. We are making more money than we ever have and are backed up almost four months, which is huge for us. But lately, the pressure has started feeling different. Now I've got employees with families, depending on these paychecks, customers are trusting us with big money, and mistakes cost way more than they used to. I still want to grow, but sometimes I honestly miss when it was smaller and simpler.

• 20:57Speaker 01

  How did you handle that place realizing that your decisions affect a lot more than just you now?

• 21:05Andy Frisella?

  I certainly leaned into it. I didn't run away from it. You know, for me, that happened about when I was 13 or 14 years into my business.

• 21:18Andy Frisella?

  You can only go so far when it's about you, okay? When your purpose is about you and you go out and you make enough money and you're able to, you know, pay your bills and, you know, maybe you have a couple toys and you're not in a financial position of stress the way that you were, comfort starts to set in. And when comfort starts to set in...

• 21:43Andy Frisella?

  That's when things get real dangerous because most of the time when comfort sets in, people stop going and doing the things that got them to that point. And while all of their competitors are still doing those things, and then they end up losing and they can't figure out why they lost. Cause they're like, well, you know, I was doing good, but now things are not good. Well, yeah, the reason things aren't good is because you're playing a game that runs on a sliding scale. You are actually competing against other human beings. And when the, when everybody else is moving forward and you stand still, they're going to pass you. It's no different than getting way ahead in a marathon and then deciding to pull out your lawn chair and say, man, you know what? I'm so far ahead. This is great. I'm at mile 19. I'm going to chill. I'm going to, and then eventually they pass you up.

• 22:27Andy Frisella?

  And then you, you can't catch them because you have to start the momentum over again. So, so you have to understand that comfort is super dangerous. And the way you should be looking at this is this is a reignition of your responsibilities that will cause you to continue to progress, learn, work, grow, and create at a bigger scale level. What you should be doing right now, by the way, the four month waitlist is not good, just so you know. Okay. No, you think that's good for you.

• 22:58Speaker 01

  Where you.

• 22:58Andy Frisella?

  That's not good.

• 22:59Speaker 01

  Perspective.

• 23:00Andy Frisella?

  You know why that's not good? Because those people that are waiting for four months might hire someone that can do it tomorrow. Okay. So while you think it's good because we've got all this business on the books, you're thinking about yourself. You're not thinking about your employees. And dude, if you're an ethical business owner, you have to understand that you have a responsibility for the people who have bet on you for their livelihoods. Those men and those women have bet on you for their livelihoods. Understand that. And if you can't take that seriously, not only will you not win, you're kind of a shit shitty owner. Not even kinda, you are. All right. So this is a point in time where your intent naturally moves,

• 23:43Andy Frisella?

  and this happens to all entrepreneurs who scale. Okay. It naturally moves from.

• 23:50Andy Frisella?

  What I need to do for me to a point where I have to grow because these people are betting on me and they have families and they have homes and they have obligations. And if I don't grow the business, they're not going to be able to pay those things. And that's a different kind of pressure. It's kind of like I imagine, like when people have children and it's all about themselves. And then all of a sudden, there's this little fucking sack of meat that comes out and you're like, holy shit dude, if I don't do it, this kid's going to fucking starve. Okay, now I've never experienced it in that way, but I imagine that's what it feels like.

• 24:23Speaker 01

  100%.

• 24:24Andy Frisella?

  Okay, that's what I've been told.

• 24:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:27Andy Frisella?

  But that same responsibility and obligation should be

• 24:33Andy Frisella?

  put on your employees as well. Okay, because like dude, these people are betting on you, man. They're betting their lives, they're betting their families, they're betting their futures on you. And if you sit there because you have, you know, a couple bucks in the bank, you're a piece of shit. That's the truth. Okay, because they're betting on you. You have to understand that they are betting on you. Okay, and you, a lot of people like to bitch, nobody believes in me, nobody. What about all those employees that show up every day? They fucking believe in you. Otherwise, they wouldn't fucking be there. Okay, so how you should be looking at this now is to change the responsibility and the intent from yourself to them. All right.

• 25:15Andy Frisella?

  And when you can do that, and then you expand the vision of your growth to include their hopes and dreams and what they're trying to accomplish underneath that umbrella. Now you start to create a really great company that solves the problem of overwhelm that you're currently experiencing. When you have people that understand that they're, that they can actually achieve what they're trying to, they can make enough money, they can build what they want, they can live in the house they want, they could drive the car they want. They can do these things in your system. Now you're in a situation where they are willing to help you in a very proactive way

• 25:58Andy Frisella?

  to handle the minutia and the overwhelm that comes with scaling. So your choices are this.

• 26:06Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, you can reminisce about the good old days, but remember in the good old days, you were fucking broke. Okay, you didn't have the bass boat, you didn't have the Corvette, you didn't have the Escalade, you didn't have a nice house, you were starving and you had to watch what the fuck you ordered at the restaurant. See, everybody likes to reminisce about the good old days, but they forget those things. Okay, so let's be real about what you're talking about. And I would remove this idea from your head because there is a metaphysical, quantifical element to what you desire in your brain that the universe and God will provide for you. So if you start to think, man, I really would just like to live a simple life and all this shit, God's gonna find a way to deliver that to you and you may not like the way he delivers it.

• 26:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:50Andy Frisella?

  So you need to be thinking about the other people, you need to be thinking about their wellbeing, and when you can go from thinking about you to thinking about them unlocks a whole new level in entrepreneurs.

• 27:01Speaker 01

  Yeah. Well, dude, like, again, we've talked about this before, man. It's like, you know, like, dude, you said, like, you said, like, man, I miss the store days. I do miss it, but my job, my role is different.

• 27:12Andy Frisella?

  It's changed. It's evolved.

• 27:13Speaker 01

  You know what I'm saying? How many different hats have you worn?

• 27:15Andy Frisella?

  All of them.

• 27:16Speaker 01

  You know what I'm saying? HR, fuck, like.

• 27:18Andy Frisella?

  Dude, all of them. I've packed boxes. Dude, I remember whenever we first started shipping out, dude, at four o'clock in the afternoon, we would go out and literally pack the boxes. Okay, before that, when it was just me and Chris, we would print shit out on a printer and there'd be like five or six boxes and we would pack them and order them. I mean, I've done everything. Everything from sweeping the floors to being the CEO, to be a chairman of the board, like ever, everything, everything. I've done everything.

• 27:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:47Andy Frisella?

  Okay.

• 27:47Speaker 01

  You gotta get comfortable in what that role is now.

• 27:49Andy Frisella?

  Yes, and that role will evolve. And when you get a new role, that's gonna come with different responsibilities. The reason that I like the quote unquote good old days was because I got to deal more with customers face to face. That's not reality for me anymore.

• 28:03Speaker 01

  Not because it was easier.

• 28:04Andy Frisella?

  No, that's, I just enjoyed it.

• 28:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 28:07Andy Frisella?

  So I find other ways to do that. For example, how I do that now is instead of dealing with customers face to face, I will walk the floors and I will talk to the people and I will talk to them and I will help them with what they are doing and I get that same sort of reward in a different way.

• 28:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 28:23Andy Frisella?

  So, yeah, man.

• 28:27Andy Frisella?

  Look dude, this is very simple. Stop thinking about yourself. Start understanding that you have a massive responsibility to take care of your employees. And that little fire that you feel like is getting a little, uh, you know, small is gonna reignite in a way that's much bigger than it ever was. Because there's one, it's one thing to worry about yourself. Okay. Like I know how to survive being broke. All right. It's, I don't ever want to go back there, but the reality is, is if I had to, I could fucking do it and it wouldn't, it wouldn't be a deal.

• 29:00Andy Frisella?

  When I think of my employees in any company that I'm involved in or own. And I think about them having the obligation of children and I think about their bills and I think about the things that they have. These are serious obligations, dude. And I always think like, fuck, what, what's going to happen if, if they lose their job? Like I, that, I hate that. I don't want, I don't want that to happen.

• 29:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:26Andy Frisella?

  And, and if I'm being honest, sometimes I care about that too much, which causes me to hang on to employees longer than I should.

• 29:33Speaker 01

  Oh, that's a whole other fucking conversation.

• 29:35Andy Frisella?

  Because dude, like I am.

• 29:38Speaker 01

  You got a good heart.

• 29:39Andy Frisella?

  I do. And sometimes it's fucked me, but the, the overall result is still much better because of it.

• 29:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, I love it, man. Love it, guys. Andy, let's get to our third and final question. Guys, any question? Number three. Uh, Andy, I think I spent most of my early twenties subconsciously waiting for someone to point me in the right direction. A mentor, an opportunity, a break, something. Now I'm 30 and I'm realizing nobody's coming.

• 30:14Andy Frisella?

  No shit.

• 30:16Speaker 01

  Andy, uh, if, if I want a different life, it's on me to build it.

• 30:19Andy Frisella?

  Yep.

• 30:20Speaker 01

  Uh, but was there a moment for you where that fully clicked? And once it did, how did you change the way you approached life? Yeah. Did you move differently?

• 30:32Andy Frisella?

  Well, look.

• 30:35Andy Frisella?

  I started when I was 19. I didn't have any money. We had $12,000 that we used to pay the rent for our store

• 30:45Andy Frisella?

  for an entire year because nobody would rent to us because we didn't have credit. And we didn't have anything that would make them want to rent to us. So then we had to finance the rest of everything on the credit cards, which put pressure on us and put debt on us. So I didn't have a choice. All right. I had to go. And

• 31:08Andy Frisella?

  for a long time, we had smaller competitors

• 31:14Andy Frisella?

  who even at that level, you know, they're, they came from a rich family. They had an inheritance. They had an investor. They had something. And I used to be really bitter about that. I used to get really mad about it. The first, especially the first

• 31:33Andy Frisella?

  three or four years where like literally we weren't making any money. It would really irritate me. I was like, what the fuck? You know, we got to compete against all these people who have all this and that and this and this and this. But what I started to realize is that

• 31:50Andy Frisella?

  because those people had those resources, they weren't learning the lessons that they needed to learn that made them effective. And so by year four, five, six, I was being able to outmaneuver them like very easily.

• 32:06Andy Frisella?

  And they couldn't figure out why. Well, the reason why was because I started with nothing and I had to figure it out. And they started with the safety net and they didn't have to figure it out. They could always go to just writing a check or going back to the investor or going to their trust fund or whatever they had to do. So I started to understand that I was learning these skills that they didn't learn. By year 10, I had put most of these people out of business. Okay? So I went through that in a little bit different way. But I did realize from the very beginning that it was on me and nobody else. Like, nobody was going to come and do any of the shit for us. Like, it wasn't even.

• 32:50Andy Frisella?

  It wasn't even like something that I really thought about. Was I bitter that other people had better advantages than me? Yeah, until I understood that I was the one with the advantage. Because people who come with resources and they come with safety nets and they come, those people never learn how to fucking fight. It's just like people who complain about how hard it was growing up. And they say, well, I grew up here and I grew up with the trailer and I did this and I come from the hood and nobody gives a fuck about me. Do you understand how big of a fucking advantage that actually is? Because you learn the skill of survival and fighting at a very young age.

• 33:31Andy Frisella?

  But because your perspective is based upon what people try to say is, you know, oh, that person got there because they had this or that person was lucky. Or that's, that's what we hear our whole lives. We hear from other people around us our whole lives that literally everybody else that's made it did so because they had some sort of advantage that you don't have. That's not the way it really works. The way it really works is, is that the people who build real shit, they actually come from the hardest situations early on in life because they had to learn how to survive and provide for themselves in a way that these other people didn't, you know? They learned how to fight young.

• 34:17Andy Frisella?

  And when you come from that and you look at it at the right perspective, which is what I'm telling you now, you are at a tremendous advantage over everybody else. Okay, but most people can't break free of that victim mindset. And they don't understand the reality that all of these people that they look at, the reason they have all these crazy stories about where they come from isn't because they make them up after they get there. It's because the people who had to go through the hardest shit are the people that are equipped to actually fight the battle of entrepreneurship. So this whole idea that is in society that is propagated by a bunch of fucking people who are victim mindset losers, that everybody who's done everything is somehow, you know,

• 35:02Andy Frisella?

  grew up with a fucking golden spoon in their mouth is total bullshit. All right, the best operators in the world came from the hardest situations. Every single operator that I know that's built anything relevant. Those people came from shit, okay? So if you come from shit, you should, instead of like saying, oh, I come from all this bad stuff and I got PTSD T270 from fuck, from when I grew up, like, motherfucker, use that shit.

• 35:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:28Andy Frisella?

  Okay? Lean into that. Understand that you are equipped with a set of skills that these other people don't have.

• 35:38Andy Frisella?

  And when you apply those skills and they continue to go down the path, eventually you get to a point where all of the people with the quote unquote advantages have fallen off because they have a backup plan. They have comfort. They don't have to succeed. Otherwise, you know, they could go, they have the ability to go back to mom and dad or go back to say, oh, I'll try this other thing or do this other thing or do this other thing. That's, that's something you don't have and that's a blessing. That's not, that's not a handicap. And so, you know,

• 36:14Andy Frisella?

  I don't know if that really answers your question about like, how do I realize that nobody's coming? Uh, the, the only thing you gotta realize is that like, that's the, that's what it is. Like, nobody's coming, bro. People have their own lives in mind. They are worried about themselves. This is why like all you fuckers that think everybody's talking about you all the time, bro. Bro, they're talking about you in a passing conversation one time. They're, your, your ego's so big, you think people just obsess over what you're doing? Like, fuck that. You know what I'm saying? Like, they're worried about themselves. So, go ahead.

• 36:50Speaker 01

  No, I mean, you don't, like, one of the things that I've always like had a hard time understanding is like that, that whole thing of like, oh, everybody else has got it and I don't have. It's like, well, first, like, you don't even know if they actually do have an advantage. Like, you don't know, because you're just seeing the end result, not the, not the work that went into that.

• 37:05Andy Frisella?

  Right.

• 37:05Speaker 01

  That's one, but then two, who gives a shit? It ain't you. It's not your situation.

• 37:10Andy Frisella?

  Right, right.

• 37:10Speaker 01

  You know what I'm saying? It's like,

• 37:12Andy Frisella?

  Could have, should have, would have been, could have been, hope, hope, hope it was too fucking bad. Okay? It ain't. Yeah, it ain't. It is what it is. Like, and if you, that's right. That's right. Boo. You have to be dedicated to producing the end result. You have to be obsessed with it, dude. Like, that's the thing. It's like, you know, like these, these idiots on the internet who put out all this shit about balance and gonna fucking work life. There's no work-life balance as an entrepreneur. That's not real, especially when you're getting, getting it going. It's not a real fucking thing. Okay? And anybody who says different hasn't built anything. You know, the whole problem with the internet is it gave a voice to people who can talk real well and say nothing. Right? So that's the entire problem with the internet.

• 37:56Andy Frisella?

  How many of these people saying, oh, you're gonna have work-life balance have actually built anything significant? Okay? I promise you, they did not have work-life balance in the first five to 10 years. They didn't have it. You have to be obsessed, bro. That's the level of competition because you have to understand other people are obsessed. There are people that will eat a bowl of glass and eat a pile of shit every single day for as long as it takes to get where the fuck they want to go. And if you're not one of them, they're gonna beat you. That's it. That is reality. So I had this kid messaged me the other day and like I was showing something on my Instagram. Oh, I know what it was. I was showing the startup of my Carrera GT and he could see all the other cars through

• 38:38Andy Frisella?

  the windshield. And he messaged me and he's like, dude, I'm so sick of being where I'm at. Like, honestly, how do I acquire this level of wealth? Like, how do I do it? And I'm like, dude, how old are you? He's like, 22. I'm like, perfect. You're the perfect age. You have to become, you have to become so obsessed with producing the outcome that literally nothing else fucking matters. Nothing. And people will say, oh, that's selfish. That's wrong. It is what the fuck it is. That's what it takes. Okay? If you are not obsessed with producing that outcome, especially in the beginning, you're gonna get eaten alive.

• 39:18Andy Frisella?

  You're gonna get eaten the fuck alive. And it doesn't matter what Joe Schmo therapist or, you know, dude who never built anything on the internet who's doing shit for like, shares, views. Remember, half the shit on the internet. Is pacifying victim minded bullshit that people post to make people feel better about them not doing the thing that they're supposed to do. Okay, learn to take a step back and watch people's content. A lot of the things that are being said are not said because they're the truth. They're said because it makes the majority of the market, which is people who are not going to

• 39:57Andy Frisella?

  follow through, feel much better about not following through. Okay, it is, it is pro, it is giving them permission to stay where they are. And that's why it gets the likes, shares, views. That's why when you see a clip of me saying what I just said, people are like, oh, are you happy? Yeah, motherfucker. I actually am happy. I walk into my garage every day and get to pick out a car like you pick out your fucking shoes. Okay, it's cool as fuck. I get to do whatever I want. If I want to go to fucking Vegas today, I'd call up and there'll be an airplane in 30 fucking minutes and I can go there. I can do whatever the fuck I want anytime I want. If one of my family members or one of my friends or somebody I know, their house is about to get foreclosed on, I can fix that. Okay,

• 40:41Andy Frisella?

  someone gets cancer, I could fucking pay for that, which I've done all those things. Okay, if our city gets hit by a tornado, I can fucking contribute to that. I can make differences because, and those things make me happy. Yeah. So this whole idea of you either get to be rich or you get to be happy is it's not either or dude. It's how you get rich and what value system you have and what you do with the money that allows you to figure out what you're gonna do when you be happy. People have this lie in their mind, you know, because I'll tell you, this is true too.

• 41:18Andy Frisella?

  After a while, when you own all the material shit, it stops mattering. Like when I walk into my garage, you know this because you've been there and we bring someone, even if they're famous, into the garage who's been around it, they're like, holy shit. To me, I don't even notice it. Yeah. Like I'm walking in, I'm like, this is my life. This is what I do. All right?

• 41:42Andy Frisella?

  I don't give a fuck about like, I know you guys see me post all the cars and shit. I'm posting that for fucking 18 year old, 19 year old, 20 year old Andy to say, hey, man, look what the fuck you can do.

• 41:53Speaker 01

  How do I get that?

• 41:54Andy Frisella?

  Right. This, this idea that you can buy all this shit, it's going to make you happy. No, that's not, that's not true. But it gives you far more ability to make impact on your friends, your family, your community, which makes you really happy. Okay. So, you know, you can't really listen to someone who says, oh, are you happy? Yeah, he's got all this shit, but is he happy? Uh, well, they don't know because they never had anything. Okay. You never hear someone who has made a bunch of money and worked their fucking ass off and worked for 30 years and build this incredible life. And then they say, oh, man, I wish I hadn't have done that.

• 42:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 42:37Andy Frisella?

  That's not what the, you never hear them say that. You only hear people who haven't done a motherfucking thing say that. And then you have these feel good predators on the internet who could, by the way, they understand what they're doing. Okay. This is why I call them predators. They know and are aware that most of their market is people who are going to not do the thing. So they curtail their content to make people feel great about not expanding their own human potential, which is ultimately the entire goal of being on this fucking planet. Listen, motherfuckers, these people are handicapping you and not a single one of them has made any money outside of the, the other,

• 43:23Andy Frisella?

  outside of anything other than making people feel like it's okay to just be right where they are. And dude, the reality is, and then you have the Christians. I am one who don't understand Christianity and think that being a very small little, you know, poor little me is somehow biblically the way you should be. The Bible actually talks about you not wasting your fucking talents to become who it is you're supposed to become. God gives you gifts. He gives you something inside of you that is meant for you to pull out, develop, and give to the world. And there's no favor in God's

• 44:05Andy Frisella?

  eyes to not use those things. It talks about it in the Bible. So this whole idea of there's some sort of moral high ground of wasting your life, being a nothing, is a complete lie, and it is totally exploited by these feel-good predators who know that their audience is a bunch of fucking victims. And if they say something like, "Hey, you have to be obsessed with your goals, and you have to like, fucking, basically, for a period of time, give up everything else," they know that those people don't want to hear that. They want to hear what they want to fucking hear. It makes them feel good about how they are now. And that's, that's why these people do that. They know. They fucking know what they're doing.

• 44:50Andy Frisella?

  That's the thing you don't understand. You know how I know they know what they're doing? Because I know these people, and they've told me that, and they've said things like that. Okay? And it's disgusting shit. Imagine, bro, imagine your whole business is being some sort of therapist, or some sort of influencer, or some sort of author, and your whole business plan is to make people feel good about being way less than what they could be, because you know that's what's going to sell shit for you. That is fucking evil shit. That is predatory shit. And that is what you are listening to. And then furthermore,

• 45:30Andy Frisella?

  the rest of the people that post all this content about, you know, "Oh, you gotta have this, and this, and this," and this. Listen, man.

• 45:42Andy Frisella?

  They've never done anything. They don't know. Okay, people are good talkers. They're not, just because they can get on a microphone and get in front of an interview and sound real smart, doesn't mean they fucking know what the fuck they're talking about. Okay, there's these things, I don't know if you know them, they're called, it's called acting. Okay, like, you know, there's, this is another thing called lying, right? And just because someone, like, do you ever notice that the people who seem to be the nicest are always the ones that lie the most?

• 46:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, no shit.

• 46:12Andy Frisella?

  Okay, like.

• 46:14Speaker 01

  Oh, but they're so nice.

• 46:15Andy Frisella?

  Yeah, right. And then we find out all this fucked up shit. I'm gonna tell you right now, I'm totally fucked up. Okay, so I don't ever pretend to not be, but I'm gonna tell you this. I know what I know about winning. And if you're not obsessed with winning, and you don't realize that no one's fucking coming, you're not gonna get fucking anywhere.

• 46:33Speaker 01

  I love it, dude. I love it, man. Guys, Andy, dog. That's a hell of a way to start a week.

• 46:38Andy Frisella?

  All right, guys. Let's go out. Let's get better. We'll see you tomorrow on CTI. Do not be a hoe.

• 46:43Speaker 01

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