Harvard’s #1 Professor on the Secret to Happiness & Meaning in Your Life! Part 3 with Arthur Brooks

What if you measured success in life, by units of love verses money or career progression or even time. Harvard’s top professor Arthur Brooks is here and trust me this conversation is life changing! Get ready to truly discover your purpose and feel a sense of fulfillment and greater meaning in your life! If this has been something you’ve been searching for or perhaps are struggling with, you’re not alone! Millions of people describe feeling a growing sense of emptiness or lack of significance and if you can relate, and if you want more meaning and fulfillment in your life, then today’s part 3 episode with Arthur Brooks is for you! Arthur C. Brooks is a Harvard professor, PhD social scientist, and #1 bestselling author, who specializes in using the highest levels of science and philosophy to provide people with actionable strategies to live their best lives. In his brand new book called The Meaning of Your Life he leans on cutting-edge science and great philosophers to give you a blueprint that he says will help even the most skeptical person find a life of spiritual transcendence, passionate love, and true calling. Yes please! Arthur speaks to audiences all around the world about human happiness and he’s flown across the country to be here in person with you and me today! and I am so excited for this conversation! Are You Ready to believe in YOU?🙌 jamiekernlima.com 👈 Sign up for my FREE Inspirational Newsletter and get ready for your self-worth to soar!🩷 Also, please make sure to take 2 seconds and click the “Follow” button right here on this page to follow me and the podcast, I’m so grateful and thank you SO much! Order your copy of Arthur's new book here: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/ ___ And whether you're joining me today for yourself or because someone that you love shared this episode with you, I want to welcome you to the Jamie Kern Lima Show podcast family. And remember this episode is not just for you and me. Please share it with every single person that you know because it can change their life too. ____ Chapters: 0:00 Welcome to The Jamie Kern Lima Show 10:10 Your Life Is Divinely Orchestrated! (IF You're Open to It!) 17:40 How To Have Rock Solid Faith It’s such an honor to share this podcast together with you. And please note: I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to Subscribe to the YouTube Channel Follow me here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ — Sign up for my inspirational newsletter for YOU at:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ jamiekernlima.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ — Looking for my books on Amazon? Here they are! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WORTHY⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Believe IT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Coming up in this incredible Part Three episode with Arthur Brooks.

• 0:04Jamie Kern Lima?

  Can you find true meaning in your life if you do not believe in a power greater than yourself?

• 0:11Speaker 02

  Answers.

• 0:13Speaker 02

  I need his prayers and my family needs his prayers and he prayed for me.

• 0:19Speaker 02

  And it was a great day.

• 0:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  I've never seen you get emotional before.

• 0:24Speaker 02

  We need each other. Your life is measured in love. If you can allow people to love you, you've lifted other people up in the way that really matters. In the only way that really matters. That's the bottom line. I think that's why we're here. I honestly think that's why we're here.

• 0:44Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you know the meaning of your life? Do you feel a true sense of purpose? Is this something you've been searching for but perhaps are struggling with? If so, you're not alone. Millions of people in fact describe this feeling of a growing sense of emptiness or lack of significance. And if you can relate and if you want more meaning and fulfillment in your life, then today's episode is for you. Arthur C. Brooks is a Harvard professor, PhD social scientist, and number one bestselling author of multiple books, who specializes in using the highest levels of science and philosophy to provide people with actionable strategies to live their best lives right now.

• 1:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  And in his brand new book, it's called "The Meaning of Your Life", he leans on cutting-edge science and great philosophers to give us a blueprint that he says will help even the most skeptical person find a life of spiritual transcendence, passionate love, and true calling. Yes, please? Arthur speaks to audiences around the world about human happiness and he's flown across country to be here in person with you and me today. I am so excited for this conversation. And whether today you're listening for yourself or because someone you love shared this episode with you, I want to welcome you to the Jamie Kern Lima Show Podcast Family. Thank you so much for being here.

• 2:10Jamie Kern Lima?

  If you haven't done this already, can you take a second and click the follow or subscribe button on the app you're listening to or watching on right now? It really, truly means the world to me. And also, you can get more inspiration for free right now from me to you. Just join my newsletter community at jamiekernlima.com. And this incredible episode today is not just for you and me. Please share this with every single person that you know who may need some inspiration or to find meaning in their life today. Because what you're about to hear can truly impact mine, yours, and their lives too.

• 2:46Speaker 00

  Welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima Show.

• 2:49Jamie Kern Lima?

  Oprah, how have you defied the odds?

• 2:53Speaker 00

  Her show is unlike any I've ever done. A revelation. When you listen, it feels like a hug.

• 3:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  First Lady, Michelle Obama.

• 3:02Speaker 00

  Jamie, you are going so deep. I have never had this in-depth conversation. I've actually never said that out loud to anybody in an interview before. You know how to get there. Your brain and your spirit and your heart is like, wow.

• 3:18Jamie Kern Lima?

  Melinda French Gates.

• 3:20Speaker 00

  When I look into Jamie's eyes, I feel like I am on some other cosmic level with her.

• 3:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  Meghan, Duchess of Sussex.

• 3:29Speaker 00

  I wasn't expecting that one. I could see the light around her. She's infused with light.

• 3:35Jamie Kern Lima?

  Maria Shriver.

• 3:36Speaker 00

  I never made that mistake again.

• 3:39Jamie Kern Lima?

  Imagine overcoming self-doubt, learning to believe in yourself and trust yourself and know you are enough. Welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima Show.

• 3:51Speaker 00

  Jamie Kern Lima is her name. Everybody needs Jamie Kern Lima in their life. Jamie Kern Lima. Jamie, you're so inspiring. Jamie Kern Lima.

• 4:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  Can you find true meaning in your life if you do not believe in a power greater than yourself?

• 4:12Speaker 02

  Answer is yes. The answer is yes. What you need to do is stand in awe of something that's amazing. So that's really what it transcends to. And you need to serve other people. You need love toward other people. And you need to be needed is actually how this works. And it's a really beautiful thing that I actually find in my research, how to be needed by somebody else. And one of the ways to do this, by the way, that a lot of people miss, is to allow people to serve you. A lot of people don't want to do that. In our me, me, me, me, me based culture, I'm so independent. I'm such a rugged individualist that nobody, I don't need anybody. And I experienced this, and I had a very interesting experience that helped me understand this scientifically,

• 4:54Speaker 02

  but personally as well. I was giving a lecture at a university. And I was talking about how the most selfless people allow them to be served by others because that allows other people to transcend when they help you, right? And a beautiful gift you can give to somebody else is letting them help you, right? And a kid puts up his hand and he said, "Well, what about people who I can't give anything to? Where there's nothing that they could do that I need?" And I said, "Well, give me an example." And he said, "Well, a homeless person." I said, "Huh?" And I was stumped for a minute. Matter of fact, I went home that night and I thought about it.

• 5:33Speaker 02

  And then I had this idea about transcendence and this kind of switcheroo. And I was out on the street, I was in New York. And a guy asks me, he's hungry, he asks me, "And so I believe you should give." So I got him food, right? And then, as I was giving him the food, I said, "Will you do something for me?" And he said, "Well, what?" I mean, I was never asked him for anything. I said, "Would you please pray for me and my family? Because I believe I need his prayers. The truth is, I actually need his prayers. I believe that God hears the cries of the poor especially. And I'm not poor. I'm not poor in so many ways. I'm rich in so many ways. But I need his prayers. And my family needs his prayers. And he prayed for me.

• 6:18Speaker 02

  And it was a great day. It was a great day. And he was seven feet tall.

• 6:26Speaker 02

  Because he gave me something I needed. And that's what we can do. That's transcendence. Whether you believe in God or not, that's transcendence.

• 6:35Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm. That's so good. That is so beautiful. I've never seen you get emotional before.

• 6:42Speaker 02

  I need the cries, I need the, I need the cries of the poor. I need the prayers of the poor. We all do.

• 6:54Jamie Kern Lima?

  And what do you mean exactly by that?

• 6:56Speaker 02

  You know, we need each other. And, and you know, we live in a world where we're so strong, you know, but it's not right. It isn't right. You know, when, when other people help us and when we love each other mutually, yeah, it's the right side of our brains, but it's that, it's our hearts are on fire. You know? Again, your life is measured in love. If you can allow people to love you, you've, you've lifted other people up in the way that really matters. And the only way that really matters, that's the bottom line. I, I think that's why we're here. I honestly think that's why we're here.

• 7:38Speaker 02

  And it's a, you know, life is full of lessons like that, right? That's why I do my work.

• 7:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  I'm thinking of the homeless man and how he must have felt after praying for you.

• 7:52Speaker 02

  Yeah. And who knows if he's telling somebody that story? And, and, and I didn't fix his life. You know, people can watch this and say, yeah, Brooks, but did you buy him a house? Like, no. You know, but we all have little ways, big ways, of course, and public policies and taxes and, but little ways too. Because once again, it's in the micro decisions that we make that we lift each other up.

• 8:15Jamie Kern Lima?

  And he lived in love in that moment.

• 8:17Speaker 02

  Yeah. And I bet he doesn't get very many of those moments. Cause people don't look at him as a human. But boy, oh, boy, do I need him.

• 8:29Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you believe that we all have a divine calling?

• 8:34Speaker 02

  Yes, I believe that we have a calling, which is what we're meant to do. And that doesn't mean it's the same thing all the time. It doesn't mean that you you have one calling, Jamie. It means there's a lot of things that you're meant to do. And then a vocation, what they have to do with is that that's how you earn your success, uniquely using your talents, and that's how you serve other people. And that's going to change over the course of your life. And that your your job is to look for that and serve it. Right, that's one of the reasons that it's so critically important in finding meaning and not getting stuck. Not getting stuck. And you know, if you know, you go through business school, you went through business school, I teach you to business school, we know the business school culture really well. Okay, you're going to get on the path and

• 9:16Speaker 02

  all the way up. That's a mistake for a lot of people. Because that's not a search for calling, that's a search for success. And and calling is going to find you if you're actually listening. Thinking, how can I earn my success? And how can I serve other people? And how can I uniquely do that at different points in my life? Women are better than that than men, by the way. And the reason is because women will come out of college, if they go to college, and they'll do a particular job. And then they'll generally change speeds. If they're having children and they'll be spending more time creating value with the people who with the poor who need them the most, which is their children. Because these are the poor. I mean, they have nothing except for you. And then they'll, at a particular point in life, they'll go back and do something different than they did in the first phase.

• 9:59Speaker 02

  Generally speaking, women will have like four different phases, four different callings at different points in their life. And it's a very beautiful thing. Men struggle with that a lot more. And so I have to coach a lot of guys to be more like their wives.

• 10:11Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you think, do you think our lives are, do you think our lives are divinely orchestrated?

• 10:18Speaker 02

  Yes, I do believe that. I believe that God has a plan for my life. And my job is to actually have that, is to uncover that, to discover that, to discover what that actually is. And that's a theory, you know, the, um, some people think that entrepreneurs invent stuff. Some people think that entrepreneurs discover something that was already out there. It just hadn't been discovered yet, that all the ideas are kind of out there and you got to discover it. So I would ask you, because you're an entrepreneur, do you believe that you invented something or discovered something?

• 10:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  I, when I built it cosmetics, a lot of people don't know this, I don't think I've ever been asked this. But we launch over a hundred products. I would pray for divine downloads. I would pray, like, God, can you tell me what people need? What will inspire people? What's something that is different and better than anything else out there? That's going to make someone's life better. Like, I would pray for divine downloads. So I feel, just like when I wrote my books, I felt like they came through me. I didn't feel like it was me. I didn't feel like I have some talent where I thought of something. I literally would pray for it.

• 11:21Speaker 02

  You felt like you revealed something?

• 11:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 11:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's, that's the discovery theory. See, it's not you, it's not Jamie, Jamie, Jamie invented this thing. It's like, no, no, no, no, no, it was there. It just had to be discovered by you. And that requires a lot of humility, a lot of openness is how this works. And, and so, so that's what I believe is the case for all of our lives. That our life has a real purpose to it, has that second component of meaning. And that we're here to discover what that is. And, and when it's time to change, to discover what that new path actually is, that's how the pilgrimage works. Every religion has a pilgrimage. And, and, and that means just walking and walking and walking until you find what you seek. But really till what, what you're seeking finds you. That's how this works. And I've walked pilgrimages before, like hundreds of miles pilgrimages,

• 12:06Speaker 02

  until you're tired and beaten down and sweaty and you've got blisters and then your truth finds you. Then the truth finds you. And I think that that's actually divine revelation. And, and for me, I believe that God really does have something he wanted, wants me to do with my life. You know, there were times when

• 12:23Speaker 02

  I thought that I could only do this one thing when I was a musician and it wasn't going very well by my late twenties and I'm gonna be able to support my family and until I realized much later that that wasn't my calling anymore. And, and, and I was getting, it's like God's not gonna put up billboards on the, on the interstate, but it gives you all kinds of information about this by putting things in your life that show you new opportunities, that put barriers in your life to show you that it's actually trying to, time to change, which by the way, if you're super resistant to pain, you're gonna miss all those signs. You're gonna miss your suffering, your pain is not gonna be giving you the signals that you actually need. And when the pain comes, because something is not going right and you're not resistant

• 13:07Speaker 02

  to the pain, the pain will still be there, but the suffering will be lower and you'll be in the right, you'll be in the right lane.

• 13:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm, that's so good. And also, do you feel like to hear God's calling for us or to, or even to notice the suffering or the roadblocks or the this or the that, do you feel like we need to create space to do that? How, like, how, how do we hear what God's dream is for us if he's divinely orchestrating our life?

• 13:35Speaker 02

  This gets us back to something we were talking about before. Here's how we don't do it. We live in the future.

• 13:39Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 13:40Speaker 02

  Cause you're not listening, because the channel's not open. The, the relationship with God is a relationship of pure love and you can only love now. And that means that, I mean, the, the practical way to do this is to practice something. It's why, you know, people who meditate and pray, that they have good information. I mean, this is download time is the way that this works, but that's because the channel of love is open. I believe that God always has that his channel of love open to us, but we close off that channel. And sometimes it's because we're, you know, occupied with very important things like, you know, what's gonna happen tomorrow and I better make some plans. But a lot of the time, we're distracting ourselves and we're closing off that channel because we're distracting ourselves. And that's when loving now actually will make it possible for us to figure out what's going on here.

• 14:25Speaker 02

  That's when we'll, that's when we're actually listening. So it's one of the things that I'll recommend to people who are traditionally religious. I'll say, go to your house of worship and, and listen for 15 minutes a day. Go in there and listen. What do you mean? That's prayer, listening prayer. Don't talk. Listen. And you'll get the information you seek. And there's a ton of research on this, there's a ton of findings on this, that when people practice this kind of open channel, listening prayer, mindfully, right now, they get what they're looking for. They, they find, it's like, oh, oh. But if they don't, it's like, oh, boy, I better keep, you know, making as many plans as I possibly can. No. No, you're actually closing off the channel of information that you actually need to find what God's plan is for your life.

• 15:10Speaker 02

  Or if you don't believe in God, that where the divine revelation is just not going to happen, where the cosmic information is actually not going to reach you, whatever language best suits your beliefs.

• 15:20Jamie Kern Lima?

  Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Do you, in your life right now, know for sure God exists?

• 15:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean,

• 15:31Speaker 02

  that can't be known in a scientific way. And as a scientist, that's a really interesting thing.

• 15:35Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 15:36Speaker 02

  If I were a specialist in Picasso, I could look at Picasso's painting and say, I'm sure that painting exists. But I can't find evidence that Picasso exists in that painting. Can't be done. You can't actually find evidence of the Creator in the creation. You know, the, the, the Russian cosmonauts, you know, during the Soviet Union, when they were super atheistic, they used to say, you can point your, your, your telescope out into space and you won't see God. Well, of course not. Because God isn't there. God's the Creator of all these things. And that means that my technical way of understanding the creation is not going to get me closer to the Creator, for that I need faith.

• 16:19Speaker 02

  And that's a completely different technology, but it's complementary. So here's the thing, what makes me a much better scientist is an appreciation for the Creator of the science. I mean, the creation is amazing. It's amazing. It's just like, my life is just like, I'm busting all the time. And it makes me so grateful to the Creator, which, about whom I know something on the basis of faith. And, you know, it's like a childlike faith, too, by the way. Because there's all sorts of ways I could say, yeah, but, yeah, but, yeah, but. And then I have to relax and say, yeah, but my faith tells me. My faith tells me that God exists and loves me. And He's creating all these wonderful things that I'm able to discover and bring to other people over the course of my life.

• 17:02Speaker 02

  I'm a better art historian because I believe in Picasso.

• 17:06Jamie Kern Lima?

  Mm hmm, so good. It's so, it's so incredible that someone who is one of the most famous and top researchers and experts and professors and authors and thought leaders and, and, and research-driven people has such strong faith also.

• 17:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, as people will ask about that sometimes and, and I have doubts like everybody else and there's so many things that I don't actually know, but a lot of that comes down to decisions. You know, happiness and love aren't feelings. They're acts and commitments and faith is a commitment as well. If I only practiced my faith when I felt it, that'd be very occasional, you know? It's, and it's funny because we have a lot of people who wonder about religious faith. They think I need to feel it and then I need to have some beliefs and then I'll have some practices. That's exactly the opposite. You need to practice and then you'll have beliefs and then occasionally you'll feel it. That's the right way to do it and that's the right way to leave your marriage too. You practice your marriage every day, no exceptions. You know, it's like I'm faithful to my marriage 99% of the time.

• 18:16Speaker 02

  Not good enough. Not good enough. You practice your marriage impeccably all the time. A lot of times you truly believe in your marriage and then some wonderful days you truly feel your marriage. That's the way all beautiful things in life work. They're not about feeling, believe, practice. They're about practice, believe, feeling. And that's the decision that I actually make. So people say, you have this strong, strong belief. Yeah, a lot, a lot. What I have is a bulletproof practice and occasional feeling and that's good enough. That's more than good enough. That's the way I want to live.

• 18:50Jamie Kern Lima?

  We need to pause for a super brief break and while we do, take a moment to share this episode with every single person that you know who this could inspire because this conversation can truly be the words and inspiration they need to hear today to keep going, to remember that they matter and to feel less alone and more enough, more connected, more inspired and more worthy. In life, you don't soar. The level of your hopes and dreams, you stay stuck at the level of your self-worth. When you build your self-worth, you change your entire life. And that's exactly why I wrote my new book, Worthy: How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life for You.

• 19:34Jamie Kern Lima?

  If you have some self-doubt to destroy and a destiny to fulfill, Worthy is for you. In Worthy, you'll learn proven tools and simple steps that bring life-changing results, like how to get unstuck from the things holding you back, build unshakable self-love, unlearn the lies that lead to self-doubt, and embrace the truths that wake up worthiness, overcome limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome, achieve your hopes and dreams by believing you are worthy of them, and so much more. Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be?

• 20:19Jamie Kern Lima?

  Imagine a life with zero self-doubt and unshakable self-worth. Get your copy of Worthy, plus some amazing thank you bonus gifts for you at worthybook.com or the link in the show notes below. Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you. It's time to find out with Worthy. Who you spend time around is so important as energy is contagious, and so is self-belief. And I'd love to hang out with you even more, especially if you could use an extra dose of inspiration, which is exactly why I've created my free weekly newsletter that's

• 21:02Jamie Kern Lima?

  also a love letter to you, delivered straight to your inbox each and every Tuesday morning from me. If you haven't signed up to make sure that you get it each week, just go to jamiekernlima.com to make sure you're on the list, and you'll get your One-on-One with Jamie weekly newsletter, and get ready to believe in you. If you're tired of hearing the bad news every single day and need some inspiration, some tips, tools, joy, and love hitting your inbox, I'm your girl. Subscribe at jamiekernlima.com or in the link in the show notes. Do you struggle with negative self-talk?

• 21:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  Living with a constant mental narrative that you're not good enough is exhausting. I know because I spent most of my life in that habit. The words you say to yourself about yourself are so powerful. And when you learn to take control over your self-talk, it's life-changing. And I wanted to give you a free resource that I created for you if this is something that could benefit your life. It's called Five Ways to Overcome Negative Self-Talk and Build Self-Love. And it's a free how-to guide to overcome that negative self-talk to build confidence

• 22:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  and develop unshakable self-love so that you can dream big and keep going in the pursuit of your goals. Don't let self-sabotaging thoughts hinder your progress any longer. It's time to rewrite the script of your life, one filled with self-love, resilience, and unwavering belief. If you're ready to take charge of your narrative, build unwavering confidence, and empower yourself to persevere on the path to your dreams, you can grab your free guide to Stop Overthinking and Learn to Trust Yourself at jamiekernlima.com/resources or click the link in the show notes below.

• 23:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  And now more of this incredible conversation together. Do you think we all have, or not all, do you think you have an anointing?

• 23:16Speaker 02

  Hmm, do I believe that God has a plan for my life and I'm living it out? And the answer is, is that what you mean by an anointing? Do I believe that God put me in a particular place to do this?

• 23:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  Where you access the ideas that you have, where you access the gifts, where you're able to articulate them and communicate them the way that you are, in a way that is digestible, that impacts people, that's novel in so many cases. The talent of teaching the top class at Harvard, of writing books, of explaining, just in this conversation, the things you have touched on, on marriage, on meaning of life, on faith, on happiness, are so profound, like all of that. Is that an anointing where that comes from? The gifts of not just, of not just understanding these concepts of the depth that you do,

• 24:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  of not just having the intelligence to like wrap your mind around all the science and research, but then also the gift of being able to communicate it in a way that, you know... Most people can understand.

• 24:18Speaker 02

  I appreciate the question because it's um, it, it, it makes me feel like I'm, a lot of what I've tried to do in my life is coming, coming to pass. That you would say that, I appreciate that. I, um, you've lifted up so many people and I, you have this incredible gift of doing that. Of finding what people are good at, bringing it out of them and appreciating them for that. That's a charism that you have. That's why people love you, among other things, because you bring them to be their best selves and you're doing that to me right now. And I deeply love that, appreciate that. Um, there are many people in any parts of our lives that are individually better than what we do. And the bundle of the things that we do are together stronger than any one of those particular strengths.

• 25:03Speaker 02

  So I believe that, and I prayed about this a lot, that God wants me to explain the brilliant science that has largely been discovered by others. I've done a lot of scientific discovery in my own life, written a lot of academic papers, et cetera, et cetera. They were okay. But when I actually came to the part of my life where I was retailing ideas in a new way that I thought could actually touch people in a way that would really lift them up, then I was in the zone of the bundle of my, of my abilities. And that's what people actually need to look for. You don't need to be the best at that one particular thing. You need to use all the things that you have in service of the divine and others maximally.

• 25:45Speaker 02

  That's the goal. It's like, Lord, use my talents. Use my talents. Do you feel the same way? Do you feel the same way about your own? Because people would look at you and say, Jamie Kerlin is, is she's anointed. She's anointed in this particular way. But then the question is, how do you define the anointing? What is the magic? Tell me the magic of why things have gone so well for you.

• 26:09Jamie Kern Lima?

  So I have a question really quick.

• 26:11Speaker 02

  You didn't answer my question, Jamie.

• 26:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  I will. It's interesting because you do the same thing I do. You try to make it about the other person. The whole, that's so fascinating. It's probably why you know so much because you study so many people, right?

• 26:23Speaker 02

  I study people, but um, I'm committing my life to studying people in a spirit of love. And not just a spirit of intellectual inquiry. You and I are human beings. You're, you and I are human beings, spiritual beings that are having this experience right now. We, we don't want to miss that.

• 26:40Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 26:41Speaker 02

  Right.

• 26:42Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 26:44Jamie Kern Lima?

  No, I think, I think, I think we all have an anointing.

• 26:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:48Jamie Kern Lima?

  If we can get in that zone of what it is.

• 26:53Jamie Kern Lima?

  And, and I think when we're in it, it feels, it feels so right.

• 26:58Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 26:59Jamie Kern Lima?

  Like flow.

• 27:01Speaker 02

  That's a right brain experience, by the way.

• 27:04Speaker 02

  When you're doing something and it just feels right.

• 27:06Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 27:06Speaker 02

  It means you're in the right hemisphere of your brain. When it feels profound, even if it's trivial, in the world's terms. You know, you're out working in your garden and you're planting little peas. And, and that looks trivial, but it feels profound. It means your right side of your brain. When something moves you and you can't explain why, you're in the right side of your brain. You're having a meaning experience. Right? That's how you know. It's like, why? Why did that move you? I don't know. It's a train whistle at night from our shared hometown. It's the smell of rain. It's a song you once knew. It's something, and that means that there's something about it, that you're being delivered this grace of this experience of meaning, and that's how you know.

• 27:51Speaker 02

  And the way to kill that is, I don't know, go online. The way to kill that is to use the left side of your brain in a time when your right side is really supposed to be turned on. So you believe that you have this anointing, because we all do. And it's this comprehensive set of abilities to connect with other people in a particular way. You, you set up your company because you wanted to help people. You didn't set up your company because like, I want to sell it to L'Oréal. No. I know this is a part of your story. You, literally, there was a problem that people had that you wanted to solve. That women had all over the place, right?

• 28:26Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah, and, and I believe also that our lives are divinely orchestrated. I believe our steps are ordered, even when they don't make sense.

• 28:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:33Jamie Kern Lima?

  Like, when I think about, you know, I ended up doing a QVC, when you go live. You, most people who go live on air, you are, they're getting your sales data in real time. And you have to hit, you know, $10,000 a minute to get airtime. Otherwise, you're gone. On and Apple iPhones on or Dyson vacuum is on or whatever product will hit. Sales goals and I'll never forget the first time I ever went on air and like I took this huge risk. I'm like, let me just like do everything that people said wouldn't work, but that I feel like when I pray, I feel like this is what I'm supposed to do. This is how I'm supposed to do it and and we sold out that time, but every time I ended up going back on, I realized, oh, most people never come back.

• 29:16Jamie Kern Lima?

  Cause it's really hard to hit their sales goal and after doing, um, I spent eight years doing a thousand live shows on QVC. So it sold over a billion dollars in product, just straight to a camera, just it and I look at that and like, oh, in those moments of going on air. You know, by the second, if if if what you're saying is connecting with people, you know, if they're responding. Because in real time, they're either ordering on their cell phone or they're dialing, calling in or they're ordering online. And when I would get off of an airing, whether it was like an eight minute one or a one hour, or eventually we were doing three hour shows at a time. And sometimes I'd walk in the building and not leave for thirty six hours because we'd be on multiple times.

• 29:58Jamie Kern Lima?

  It was, it was a wild eight years, but what was fascinating is that I would get off air and then, you know, my team or my husband. Who'd be in the green room could tell you by the second what worked or what didn't, but also when you're live presenting a product. And if it's, if what you're saying isn't working, they'll cut your time, right? Live on the air like. So you're in this space of constant feedback of is what you're saying, does that matter to someone at home? Is it, are they feeling like it's for them? And the only reason I'm saying this is because, you know, my whole life, I used to watch Oprah in my living room. Right? And and I always had this weird sense I'd meet her one day, but I always felt like one day I want to share other people's stories with the world.

• 30:40Jamie Kern Lima?

  I want to have kind of a talk show like that and and I I go, when I look back and I think. About the idea that our lives are divinely orchestrated or that our steps are ordered. I really feel like when I went through that journey of eight years of doing over a thousand QVC shows and understanding how to connect with somebody at home, that in that moment, in that season, my hope was that the product they got home impacted their life or that they saw me using real people of every age and shape and size and skin tone and skin challenge. And even if they didn't buy anything, my hope was like that they felt like, oh, like I'm, you know, like they're a beautiful model.

• 31:18Speaker 02

  That was your objective.

• 31:19Jamie Kern Lima?

  That was the objective.

• 31:20Speaker 02

  It was like, don't get to $10,000. That wasn't your objective.

• 31:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  No, no, no, no. And then, and then, but then I look at like, oh, wow. Now, you're doing, having the blessing of having this conversation with you, I feel like even, you know, that, that going through eight years of, of the reps of that, it wasn't for that. It was for like, okay, how, now how can I somehow be of service to someone at home who needs to, who's, who's feeling, you know, not hopeful right now or down or, or lost or their child is or their friend is. And now they're going to hear about the meaning of your life, or Arthur C. Brooks, because they're tuning into the show, because I'm

• 32:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  blessed enough to have a show, because I in part put in all those reps of, of even learning how to connect with people at home.

• 32:13Speaker 02

  If this were, if you stopped doing that, if you started doing it for the worldly success, do you believe that the anointing would be withdrawn?

• 32:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  I think people would, now I have words for it because of you, because of you. I think if I were doing it for the wrong intentions, people would hear this show with the left side of their brain.

• 32:33Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 32:34Jamie Kern Lima?

  I think.

• 32:34Speaker 02

  It would just be like, another show.

• 32:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  Uh huh. Another show with information.

• 32:39Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 32:39Jamie Kern Lima?

  I think, I think in this conversation, there's so many moments in this conversation where I feel like I'm in the right side of my brain. And earlier, when we first started this conversation, and you talked about your wife and your marriage, your eyes started sparkling. And it was almost like I was watching like the right side of your brain. And, and now I have words for it, is that when we, when we are doing something with that. Intention or with the intention of love, that that's what people are feeling. And so, and so, oh, that's so good, Arthur. I'm having such a big aha moment because I think about, why was it that, you know, because there's tons of thousands of people that go on air on QVC every week. Most of them never get invited back.

• 33:18Speaker 02

  Right.

• 33:18Jamie Kern Lima?

  And it was like, oh, if, why were so many times working? Is because you're in that intention of, of love and of caring about the person at home. And so then they're feeling something, so then they're not going to change the channel.

• 33:31Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 33:32Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 33:32Speaker 02

  Exactly right. You wanted this for them. I want this for you. If this is right for you, I'm bringing it to you. It was about them. You were transcending yourself.

• 33:41Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 33:41Speaker 02

  And it's hard to transcend yourself on QVC. I mean, it's like, it's a very distracting environment for sure, but you got the reps to actually love these ideas into existence in other people's lives. And you're doing the same thing. You're doing the same thing right now. You're doing the same thing with me right now and all the people who are watching us right now. And that's what we can all do. I believe we're destined for that. Everybody watching us is destined to find the meaning of their life. And the way that they're going to do that is by loving ideas into existence in the lives of other people and using the talents that they've been divinely given.

• 34:10Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm. This conversation is so life changing. I mean, that just the takeaways from this, there are so many in so many areas. I'm going to leave this show. I'm going to leave our conversation and I'm literally going to be so much more present and I'm going to catch myself when I'm living in the future or in the whatever. Like I'm robbing the existence of love right now because you can only love in the present. That is huge. Like that is huge. And also, I think so many people are like, what's the meaning of life? I have this career and I have my 2.5 kids and I have whatever, whatever, whatever. Why am I lost? Just there's, you, you talk about so many tools in here and so many answers, as you

• 34:52Jamie Kern Lima?

  said, because it's if a book has one answer, not everyone's going to connect. You have so many answers, which is why I know the meaning of your life. Arthur's new book, Arthur Brooks' new book is going to be so, it's going to resonate with almost every person, right? Like no matter. What space, no matter their age, no matter their their time in life, you talk, you know, you work with a lot of college age or younger kids. You talk about a lot of data on age thirty or under, but also there's a lot in here for everyone over thirty and for the season in their life that they're in. And I think just the tools that you give in The Meaning of Your Life in your new book are going to be so life changing. You know, I was sitting at a dinner with my husband and I was hearing this guy on his phone and I looked over and it was,

• 35:37Jamie Kern Lima?

  he was in his seventies or eighties and he was voice texting ChatGPT a question. And I'm like, wow, if that's happening right now, that quickly, everything is gonna change. And it's addicting, and it numbs all of our stuff, and just and and and. And yet, we're running around going, why am I not happy? I have everything. Why am I not happy?

• 35:58Speaker 02

  That's what a lot of young people will say. I have everything and I feel nothing.

• 36:02Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes, yes.

• 36:04Speaker 02

  Yep. And that's what's missing. I mean, that's what's missing. You can be, you can store up your riches on the left side of your brain and be bereft of what you truly need on the right. And, and there's a way that we can actually get back to that. We can rebel against it in a really healthy and a beautiful way. And within kindness and love and the relationships that we're building with other people and the experiences that we're having and the marvels of this real world that we're having around us right now. This, this is life changing. It's been, it's, I'm working on it myself. I'm imperfect. But it's, it's the book that I needed, actually. It's the book that I needed to understand the why of my own life. And, and I hope it'll help a lot of other people as well.

• 36:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  Get your copy of The Meaning of Your Life. It's out right now. Grab it anywhere. Books are sold. Download it on Audible. There's also, and we're gonna link to all of this in the show notes as well. But Arthur, can you share a couple of the resources you have? Because right now, people can hop on and you have to come back because there's so much I want to talk about. I want to talk about the happiness about, there's so much I want to talk about. So we'll hopefully do it again.

• 37:15Speaker 02

  I would love it.

• 37:16Jamie Kern Lima?

  And so much fun. And but but right now, I want people to hop on, and I know you have some quizzes where people can figure out, you know, which of the four am I, or what, you know, where am I in my journey toward meaning or toward happiness? So where's the best place for everyone to go?

• 37:33Speaker 02

  I have a website that has all these resources. They can take a little video workshop, they can take all the tests to find where they are in their journey, how they how they kind of how they could make progress, whether happiness or unhappiness is a greater challenge in their life. And that's it. My website, arthurbrooks.com. Lots of tools, lots of all kinds of tests and a lot of stuff to read and videos to watch and all sorts of fun on there.

• 37:56Jamie Kern Lima?

  Amazing. Thank you. Thank you so much for being here.

• 37:59Speaker 02

  Thank you, Jamie. Thank you for what you're bringing to the world. I appreciate it. One beautiful thing after another.

• 38:04Jamie Kern Lima?

  Same. Arthur Brooks.

• 38:09Speaker 02

  Yay.

• 38:10Jamie Kern Lima?

  Oh, my gosh. Holy, holy. Remember this episode's not just for you and me. Please share this with every single person you know, because it can impact and change their life too. And if you love today's conversation, please click the follow or subscribe button on the app that you're listening to it on or watching it on. And if it added value to your life, you could please give it a review. I would be so grateful. Five stars is perfect. And again, just share it with everyone you believe in. Maybe it's another person in your life who could benefit from it, someone who's been searching for meaning or maybe just kind of feeling a little bit empty and needs that boost of purpose. You can also post the episode and share it with others online in your community who just might need the words and tools and lessons in this conversation today. You never know

• 38:55Jamie Kern Lima?

  whose life you're meant to change by sharing this episode. And thank you so much for joining me today. Before you go, I want to share some words with you that couldn't be more true. You, right now, exactly as you are, are enough and fully worthy. You're worthy of your greatest hopes, your wildest dreams, and all the unconditional love in the world. And it's an honor to welcome you to each and every episode of Jamie Kern Lima Show. Here, I hope you'll come as you are, heal where you need, blossom what you choose, journey toward your calling, and stay as long as you like, because you belong here. You are

• 39:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  worthy, you are loved, you are loved, and I love you. And I cannot wait to join you on the next episode of the Jamie Kern Lima Show. In life, you don't soar to the level of your hopes and dreams. You stay stuck at the level of your self-worth. When you build your self-worth, you change your entire life. And that's exactly why I wrote my new book, Worthy, How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life for You. If you have some self-doubt to destroy and a destiny to fulfill, Worthy is for you. In Worthy, you'll learn proven tools and simple steps

• 40:18Jamie Kern Lima?

  that bring life-changing results, like how to get unstuck from the things holding you back, build unshakable self-love, unlearn the lies that lead to self-doubt, and embrace the truths that wake up worthiness, overcome limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome, achieve your hopes and dreams by believing you are worthy of them, and so much more. Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be? Imagine a life with zero self-doubt and unshakable self-worth. Get your copy of Worthy, plus some amazing thank you bonus gifts for you

• 41:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  at worthybook.com or the link in the show notes below. Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you. It's time to find out with Worthy. Who you spend time around is so important as energy is contagious, and so is self-belief. And I'd love to hang out with you even more, especially if you could use an extra dose of inspiration, which is exactly why I've created my free weekly newsletter that's also a love letter to you, delivered straight to your inbox from me. If you haven't signed up to make sure that you get it each week,

• 41:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  just go to jamiekernlima.com to make sure you're on the list, and you'll get your One-on-One with Jamie weekly newsletter and get ready to believe in you. If you're tired of hearing the bad news every single day and need some inspiration, some tips, tools, joy, and love hitting your inbox, I'm your girl. Subscribe at jamiekernlima.com or in the link in the show notes.

• 42:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  And please note, I'm not a licensed therapist and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.