Bonus #151 - McDade's Maniacs Vol. 9 w/ Andrew Collin [PATREON PREVIEW]

Andrew Collin is tapped by the Instigator of Troublemakers JP McDade as quite possibly the most maniacal of McDade's Maniacs, as he recalls his luxe past life as a lucky Florida realtor, he degen gambling addict days, how he wishes he could have even been invited to the Riyadh Comedy Festival, and much more. Andrew, JP and Stav help callers including a guy whose girlfriend cut him off from intimacy after finding his adult actress in his internet search history, and a guy who wants to know how he can get his best buds to squash their business beef so they can be the groomsmen in his wedding. Follow Andrew Collin on social media: https://www.instagram.com/andrewtcollin https://x.com/andrewtcollin https://www.youtube.com/@PuddlesPodcast Follow JP McDade on social media: https://www.youtube.com/@jpmcdadecomedy https://twitter.com/jp_mcdade https://www.instagram.com/mcdadebaby 🎟️ See Stavvy live on the Dreamboat Tour 🛥️💕!!! https://stavvy.biz/ for tickets ‼️ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld ☎️ Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:17Speaker 01

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• 0:45Speaker 02

  I love when you guys go to the comments.

• 0:47Speaker 03

  Hey, Dob, how you doing?

• 0:47Speaker 02

  Say you play it.

• 0:48Speaker 03

  Beautiful, Elvis, beautiful guest.

• 0:49Speaker 02

  He's playing with his knob.

• 0:50Speaker 03

  Longtime fan, first time caller. First of all, congrats, big bro, and all the excess. Can't wait to see the new movie. Looks fucking sick.

• 0:57Speaker 02

  Thanks, dude.

• 0:57Speaker 03

  Anyway, I got a little problem. I just want to hear your advice on it. Me and my fiance have been together for a little over six years, been engaged for three years. I never have a problem with her going on my phone, ever. I always hand her my phone, she needs to do something, or she's gonna look at my phone. I never give a fuck, you know, no big deal to me. Well, one day, I give her my phone, and in my 32 years of being alive, it's the one time I didn't clear my internet search history. So, she goes on there, and, uh, huh, funny me, that morning, I was at work alone, in the truck, and I was like, hey, I haven't seen this one porn star in a while. So, I looked up that girl on my phone, looked at her.

• 1:40Speaker 02

  I gotta check in on my old babe.

• 1:43Speaker 04

  Huh, what's Rachel Starr up to?

• 1:45Speaker 02

  It's way worse than like, if you just type in big tit.

• 1:48Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 1:49Speaker 02

  That's not, but if you type in a girl's specific name, and like, yeah, multiple times.

• 1:54Speaker 04

  It implies longing.

• 1:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, like you want a relationship.

• 1:58Speaker 03

  Which is fine, you know, you're never gonna fuck this porn star. Anyway, let's see what else we got, Elvis. Just one porn star in a while. So, I looked up that girl on my phone, looked at her for a second, then put my phone away. Later that evening, my girl looks at my phone, and first thing she sees in my search history is this porn star that looks absolutely nothing like her.

• 2:17Speaker 02

  Come on.

• 2:18Speaker 03

  So, of course, she, you know, loses her shit at me, calls me every name in the book, just goes off on me.

• 2:23Speaker 02

  I think that's kinda crazy.

• 2:25Speaker 03

  Uh, now, fast forward about two weeks now. Uh, everything between me and her, you know, kind of goes back to normal. We're back to normal, you know, enjoying each other's company, loving each other and all that. The problem is, not only is she not letting me fuck, uh, she's not even letting me, uh, look at her naked.

• 2:42Stavros Halkias?

  What?

• 2:43Speaker 03

  At all. She changes or anything, I have to be on the other side of the house.

• 2:46Stavros Halkias?

  This is crazy.

• 2:48Speaker 03

  She ain't let, let me look at anything. And she said, uh-

• 2:51Stavros Halkias?

  What are you, a baby?

• 2:52Speaker 03

  Because when she looks at her body now, she feels like, oh, this isn't good enough for her.

• 2:56Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I don't have fake tits and a satanic tattoo. Yeah. I don't have, like, pentagrams around my nipples.

• 3:05Speaker 03

  I tell her, yes, it is good enough for her. You're fucking perfect. I fucking love you and you're sexy as fuck.

• 3:10Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 3:10Speaker 03

  Uh, sorry for rambling. Uh-

• 3:12Stavros Halkias?

  No, don't apologize.

• 3:13Speaker 03

  But now she's saying it's gonna be like months before she lets you see her naked, let alone hit.

• 3:17Stavros Halkias?

  No, that's crazy.

• 3:19Speaker 03

  And I'm just kinda like, I understand, but also it's like, is there anything I can do to like, show her how really sorry I am? Just now, I've never, I don't even look at porn anymore. I gave up everything.

• 3:30Stavros Halkias?

  Wow, what the fuck.

• 3:32Speaker 03

  I'm just kinda in a corner, don't really know what the next move is. If you can give me some advice, I truly appreciate it, brother. Thank you.

• 3:38Stavros Halkias?

  This is a tough one. Cause I don't, cause this is, first of all, she's being unreasonable. That's kind of, that's fucking insane. Uh, it's, you let her look at your phone, you have, there's no, you have full trust in her. I thought he was gonna say, oh, wouldn't you know it, it's the one time my crazy ex messages me, I don't talk to this bitch ever, and she just had a sixth sense for it, and she sent me something weird and it looks bad. This is nothing. You did literally nothing wrong.

• 4:09Speaker 04

  And even if it were a red line, it, it would've made more sense for her to just leave you. But now she's going about this weird Sharia law situation where she's not allowing you to see her naked.

• 4:19Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 4:20Speaker 04

  That doesn't make any, that seems like torture.

• 4:22Stavros Halkias?

  I, I, I don't know. I mean, this is tough. Because-

• 4:27Stavros Halkias?

  She's just being unreasonable here. And it's almost like, I don't think you can cuck your way out of this. I don't think you can, I don't think you can like.

• 4:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, you have to stand strong.

• 4:37Stavros Halkias?

  You ha- yeah, you.

• 4:37Speaker 02

  You gotta be like, okay.

• 4:39Stavros Halkias?

  Capitulate anymore.

• 4:40Speaker 02

  No, you can't.

• 4:40Stavros Halkias?

  You've already capitulated way too much, and I'm not obviously like, whatever.

• 4:44Speaker 02

  I think I have an idea.

• 4:45Stavros Halkias?

  Please.

• 4:46Speaker 02

  Buy the porn star's pussy online.

• 4:48Stavros Halkias?

  Pussy.

• 4:49Speaker 02

  Let her walk in on you fucking it.

• 4:51Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, sorry.

• 4:52Speaker 02

  Oh, sorry.

• 4:53Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, is this what you fucking wanted, you fucking whore?

• 4:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, this is bad.

• 4:57Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah. I guess I'm gonna fuck other women then if I can't fuck you. And I'll start with the moles of their pussies and then we'll see. Then we'll get to real pussy if you don't start acting right.

• 5:08Speaker 02

  That's what I think he has to do. I think he has to show what's actually bad. Cause what he did was so, I get so angry when fuck, it's like, he didn't do any, he didn't do anything wrong. I mean, I think you looked at it longer than a second in your truck.

• 5:21Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, listen, you beat off.

• 5:22Speaker 02

  You beat off in your truck.

• 5:23Stavros Halkias?

  Who cares if you beat off? We don't care. Again, don't lie to us.

• 5:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't lie to your doctor.

• 5:29Stavros Halkias?

  You just kept tabs with her. Who gives a fuck if you jack off? I don't know, this is like, and I guess I'll defer to all of you, cause you're all in. We have two married men, we have, and Mr. McDade is in a serious relationship, like. I don't even, I wanna, you guys take a spin at this before I weigh in, but I don't know.

• 5:46Speaker 02

  I mean, that happened to me. I've lived this.

• 5:48Stavros Halkias?

  Really?

• 5:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, she didn't, I was caught and obviously I typed in like. Bigger, just bigger tits than my wife, which is.

• 5:59Speaker 02

  Not much bigger.

• 6:00Stavros Halkias?

  Four years younger than my wife, bigger tits.

• 6:04Speaker 02

  No, it's not, it's not, dude, it's random.

• 6:06Stavros Halkias?

  It's, oh, it's AI.

• 6:07Speaker 02

  Dude, you're being weird. No, but it was something like big jugs or whatever.

• 6:12Stavros Halkias?

  Big jugs is awesome.

• 6:13Speaker 02

  And, um, she caught me and she gave me shit about it, but I was like, I don't, you gotta just. I, at least what I did is I said, look, I don't jerk off, I don't, I jerk off as fast as I can.

• 6:24Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 6:25Speaker 02

  I just need to get to come out, I swear to God, it's nothing, also, it's so generic, I do most viewed. This guy didn't.

• 6:33Stavros Halkias?

  You get to the top forty radio stations. You're jacking off to the Kesha of pornography. Alright, I guess I'm into stepmom. Yeah. This is what they're serving me.

• 6:42Speaker 02

  That's what I do. I'm very lazy with it, but it is tougher, cause it's specific.

• 6:47Stavros Halkias?

  Still, he's jacking, we're talking about jacking off.

• 6:50Speaker 02

  So what I said to her, I go, just say like, look, I jerk off, I don't, this is nothing. There's no connection. I just need to get it out. That's all it is. You know, and just really sell it on like it means nothing.

• 7:03Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, which it doesn't.

• 7:05Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 7:06Stavros Halkias?

  But go ahead. You guys want to weigh in here, Eldison or JP?

• 7:09Speaker 04

  This is a tough one. This is real tricky. I don't know. You got, do you, do you try to catch her or something? You try to like, oh, do you hit her with the Inquisition? Like, what are you beating off to?

• 7:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, look at her phone?

• 7:22Stavros Halkias?

  Probably nothing. She's probably turtled into being like asexual, which is the real problem.

• 7:28Speaker 02

  It'd be so great if she was cheating the whole time.

• 7:30Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 7:31Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, that, I don't think she is, but there is, that does happen a lot where people who are cheating are like really protective in a way that's like.

• 7:39Speaker 02

  Cause they're doing it. They're protecting. Yeah.

• 7:41Stavros Halkias?

  Projection happens constantly.

• 7:42Speaker 04

  People have this issue with like the phones and the porn and the stuff like that, but it's never ever a response like this. And this, I mean.

• 7:50Stavros Halkias?

  Clearly she has her own shit, right?

• 7:51Speaker 04

  Not to punt to like relationship counseling or anything, but it might be a good idea to sit down and talk. Like if she's having this response where she doesn't want to even be touched at all, that might be something a little deeper with her.

• 8:02Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I mean, cause, cause my, my initial thing is like, she's the one who's wrong now. You did like a very mi, if you, I wouldn't even call what you did a, a transgression, but let's say it is. You did the mo, most minor transgression.

• 8:19Speaker 04

  Let's say you've talked about it before and now this is like.

• 8:21Stavros Halkias?

  Right. And now she's like, and look, obviously she doesn't have to like do, you, you, you don't get to just fuck someone because you're in a relationship. She doesn't owe you anything, but it's like, she is really taking extreme measures. Like this is like.

• 8:36Speaker 04

  She's denying herself.

• 8:37Stavros Halkias?

  If you were cheated on, if you cheated on her and she acted this way, it would make sense. You know what I mean? Like not if you looked at pornography. So in my head, now what, what's telling, what I, what, what's screaming for me is like, you have to act like the one who's being wronged here because I think you are. But then again, I don't know if that's healthy to up the ante in a negative way or if you, if you have to be like, uh, like, I would be like, you're being fucking ridic, I mean, don't say it like that, but it's like, this is crazy. We have to talk about this cause like, uh, clearly I've triggered some kind of body image issue. I don't know what. Maybe we need to go to couples counseling. Maybe we need to figure this out, but like. This is completely unreasonable for you to react this way.

• 9:22Stavros Halkias?

  Looking at porn is fucking normal. If there's a way that you would prefer me to do it, like that's fine, but like I'm not not gonna look at porn. And that has no bearing on our relationship. But this guy's even said, I don't even look at porn anymore. Like he's fully like cucked himself and be like, I'm not even jacking off. So it's like, I think you're, you have to like, show the reality here, cause you're living in her reality where this is, where this is a reasonable response. And it just is not at all.

• 9:50Speaker 06

  I think she's had a few good weeks of like, overreacting and he's like went along with it, but yeah, I think at the very least, he owes it to himself to just be like, okay. This is unreasonable.

• 10:03Stavros Halkias?

  It is.

• 10:03Speaker 06

  Say that to her and be like, whatever, I get it. You don't like it, but I just don't think porn is a big deal and you know, maybe this is like, you know, sometimes you'll be in a relationship, you like find a boundary that you never explicitly discussed. One person thinks it's like so obvious, like who gives a fuck if you like, beat off to porn and this is like, be like, well, I'll probably beat off to porn again in the rest of my life.

• 10:33Speaker 06

  I'm not gonna, I'm not doing it now. I'm being a good behavior, but I'm gonna beat off again one day.

• 10:39Stavros Halkias?

  And when we, we have to be able to like, and look, if she means, if she's real about how she feels, two things are happening here. She has body image issues that you need to figure out. Because that's something that's gonna affect her, just for her, you should try and help her through it, but also, it clearly affects your relationship, or the more sinister thing is, she's being manipulative and using a thing that you can't be like, you can't be like, come on, stop withholding pussy. If she's like, you triggered really bad like in body image stuff for me.

• 11:11Speaker 06

  Yeah, that would be sociopathic.

• 11:13Stavros Halkias?

  But, but those are the two things that are going on here. Either she has a real issue that you guys need to deal with as a, as a couple, or she's being a fuck, she's being fucking ridiculous. And it's also like, I don't mean to, you know, press the red panic button here, but it's like, this is your fiance, you love her, but it's like, What if she fucking behaves like this when you're married? Like, it's important to deal with shit like this before, I mean, not that you're clear, you're clearly committed to her. I'm not saying like, oh, well, if she's not, if she's not giving up pussy after you jack off to porn, send that whore to the curb. That's not what I'm saying, but a little bit, you know, you should, you should investigate this.

• 11:52Speaker 02

  I think he buys her a gym membership.

• 11:54Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 11:57Stavros Halkias?

  Babe, babe, I'll get you fake tits. Yeah. I've thought about it. I know what the issue is.

• 12:03Speaker 02

  You're too disgusting.

• 12:05Stavros Halkias?

  You put her, you put a blindfold on, you're like, I got a surprise for you. You take her to a consultation with a plastic surgeon. She thinks you go to fucking the Bahamas.

• 12:12Speaker 04

  She just feels markers on her skin.

• 12:16Stavros Halkias?

  You're like, I hope your passport's in order.

• 12:19Speaker 02

  There's a photo of the porn star behind her. It's like, exhibit A. It's just a fucking.

• 12:25Speaker 04

  It's literally exhibit. It's pimp my ride.

• 12:28Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 12:28Speaker 04

  It's pimp my fiance.

• 12:30Speaker 02

  Pin my pussy.

• 12:31Stavros Halkias?

  Pin my bitch.

• 12:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:32Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 12:33Speaker 02

  She wants to look at her body. Yeah, maybe you want to try to do that. I think that might help her. Tell her to step up. But no, but yeah.

• 12:41Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, dude, you gotta, you gotta talk. This is, this is either a serious issue that you have to deal with, or she's being very unreasonable and you have to figure this out because you can't.

• 12:51Speaker 02

  Also, what's worse, if you jerk off to your brain, if a girl walked in and I'm just in a dark room.

• 12:56Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, yeah, because if I'm jerking off to my brain, it's somebody I already fucked.

• 13:00Speaker 02

  I'm not imagining someone I haven't fucked. Something weird. It's like, yeah, maybe it's a dog.

• 13:05Stavros Halkias?

  You, yeah.

• 13:07Speaker 04

  I'm imagining the suffragettes of the early 1900s. I'm hard for how much I respect them.

• 13:14Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 13:15Speaker 04

  Susan B. Anthony is going to be rock hard.

• 13:17Speaker 02

  They should love that it's just a fucking porn star. That means nothing, you know?

• 13:21Stavros Halkias?

  I, I sort of agree with you. Like, this would be semi reasonable if she found him, like, we, we kind of come up against this stuff when, like, a, a husband or a boyfriend is basically addicted to OnlyFans.

• 13:34Speaker 02

  Yes, that is.

• 13:35Stavros Halkias?

  That's different. That is a different, that's like going to a, a strip club and having a specific dancer that you give thousands of dollars to, like, but this is just, this is just like. You know, whatever.

• 13:47Speaker 04

  You buy your girlfriend a Cheesecake Factory gift card for her birthday and you're giving the stripper like thousands.

• 13:51Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

• 13:53Speaker 02

  Look, I get you more than an appetizer, but.

• 13:55Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, we're strapped here.

• 13:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, this is, yeah, you gotta just man up a little, or not man up.

• 14:01Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 14:01Speaker 02

  Just.

• 14:02Stavros Halkias?

  Person up.

• 14:03Speaker 02

  Person up.

• 14:06Speaker 04

  You have a truck for work.

• 14:07Stavros Halkias?

  That's where I cut off.

• 14:08Speaker 02

  You know what?

• 14:09Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, like, the whole thing hasn't been misogynist, we haven't been misogynist for like half of this yet.

• 14:15Speaker 02

  Get her a new pussy.

• 14:18Speaker 04

  We draw the line.

• 14:18Stavros Halkias?

  Don't man up, sorry. That language is problematic.

• 14:22Speaker 04

  We draw the line at reinforcing the gender binary.

• 14:24Stavros Halkias?

  Pimp your whore. Now, anyway, let's just get back to the pimp your whore riff. Anyway, good luck, buddy.

• 14:40Speaker 07

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• 15:40Speaker 08

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