Big Jay Oakerson

Big Jay Oakerson is a master of crowd work and one of the rawest, realest voices in comedy. Armed with his signature beanie, fingerless gloves, and an unfiltered take on life, Jay has built a cult following with his fearless storytelling and razor-sharp wit. He’s the host of Legion of Skanks, co-host of The Bonfire on SiriusXM, and the guy who’ll make you laugh at things you probably shouldn’t. Whether he's breaking down the absurdity of relationships, roasting audience members, or diving into the darkest corners of humor, Big Jay keeps it brutally funny and undeniably real. Check out his new special Big Jay Oakerson: Them Live In Denver. Out Now! https://youtu.be/T12MMZ69Z2Y?si=ahYITdaY1Ttp2zo0 #bigjayoakerson #andrewsantino #whiskeyginger #podcast ============================================================== Sponsor Whiskey Ginger: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/whiskeyginger SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS STITCH FIX Online personal styling for you! https://stitchfix/whiskeyginger SKIMS Unmatched Quality & Fit! Tell Them We Sent Ya At Checkout! http://skims.com/whiskey PROPHET X Promo Code: WHISKEY Get Up To $300 in Prophet Cash https://getprophetx.co HELIX SPECIAL OFFER! Get 27% OFF Sitewide! https://helixsleep.com/whiskey ======================================= Follow Andrew Santino: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ https://twitter.com/CheetoSantino Follow Whiskey Ginger: https://www.instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcast https://twitter.com/whiskeygingerpodcast Produced and edited by Joe Faria https://www.instagram.com/itsjoefaria Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Andrew Santino?

  What up Whiskey Ginger fans? Welcome back to the show. If it's your first time joining the show, welcome to the show. I shot my special. It's over. I feel a little sad and melancholy about it, but I'm doing a couple of dates. I'm gonna be jumping around, okay? I'm doing Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, May 22nd. May 23rd, I'm doing two shows in Winnipeg. Manitoba, is that Manitoba? I have no idea what the MB stands for. I think it does. Isn't that what it means? Who knows? I'm an idiot. Doesn't really matter. Yeah, May 22nd in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. Uh, and, uh, May 23rd, two shows in Winnipeg. Go to andrewsantino.com for those tickets. Andrew Santino dot com.

• 0:37Speaker 01

  In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 0:42Speaker 02

  Oh, that creature in the ginger beard!

• 0:45Speaker 03

  Sturdy and ginger.

• 0:46Speaker 04

  Like their heads, the ginger gene is a curse.

• 0:48Speaker 05

  Gingers are beautiful. You owe me $5 for the whiskey, $75 for the horse.

• 0:54Speaker 03

  Gingers, oh hell no. This whiskey is excellent.

• 0:58Speaker 02

  Ginger. I like ginger.

• 1:01Andrew Santino?

  Are we going all around? We're good? Hey Joe! That's my editor Joe. Say hi to Joe in that camera right there.

• 1:07Speaker 06

  Hey Joe!

• 1:08Andrew Santino?

  Joe is, uh, no longer, I used to say he's Fall River trash. He's no longer in Fall River, Massachusetts. He moved to Providence, Rhode Island. You like Providence?

• 1:17Speaker 06

  What a step. I do like Providence.

• 1:18Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's kinda nice, huh?

• 1:20Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:21Andrew Santino?

  It's, uh, it's sneaky. I think people that don't go up there don't know anything about it.

• 1:24Speaker 06

  Food's great.

• 1:25Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:27Speaker 06

  Comedy audience is great there. And it's, uh, yeah, it's just not quite Boston.

• 1:32Andrew Santino?

  It's definitely not quite Boston, yeah. I just, Boston, I love Boston. I've always had a crush on, on Boston for some reason. Then I always go there in the winter. It's like I'm fucking never there in good weather. You know what I mean? It's always bad weather and I still like it, which makes me think I shouldn't visit in the summer 'cause then I might actually wanna try to move there. Like, I love it.

• 1:49Speaker 06

  If your agents catch you on a... Like on a cycle in clubs like that you catch it's the work because they all I got very young in comedy not very young comedy but in headlining regularly.

• 2:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 2:02Speaker 06

  Where they were like, uh, you know, I was like, hey, can I like in the winter like get gigs and could that when we do Tampa and California and whatever and they're like, you want to go in the cold places where it's cold because the people show up, you know, like people come to the thing so and then you just end up in a cycle where I'm always in, I've never enjoyed the nice weather of Cleveland or Boston or Minneapolis. I've always been in those like where it hurts your bones kind of cold.

• 2:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, where you don't, you just don't leave the hotel. You're like, oh, I guess I'll just sit inside all day. It's, it's, it's tough because I do know touring in the Midwest where I'm from is only beneficial if it's the winter.

• 2:36Speaker 06

  Right.

• 2:36Andrew Santino?

  Because in the summer they will fuck off to a lake. These people live and die by lakes. And the way that East Coast kids like go down to the shore or whatever, like you didn't grow up doing that, did you?

• 2:45Speaker 06

  Um, no, not really. We were in Philly, so Jersey Shore was the thing. So I mean, like, people would go, but we didn't go very much.

• 2:53Andrew Santino?

  You didn't go to that shit.

• 2:54Speaker 06

  Wasn't a big beach person.

• 2:55Andrew Santino?

  No, well, bro, look, look at me. Yeah. I mean, we didn't, but like for us, we, you always knew someone in the Midwest growing up. He's a Midwest kid. He knows. You always knew someone that had a lake house. Chicago.

• 3:05Speaker 06

  Chicago, okay.

• 3:06Andrew Santino?

  You knew someone that had a lake house. You know, like we never, I know we never had a secondary home, but like you knew someone that did and it didn't mean that they were rich, by the way, because a lot of people got shanties on the lake, like shithole shanties. So like the, the assumption is like when you move to a place like New York or Cal or LA, if somebody said I have a lake house or a beach house, you're like, oh, this guy's got fucking paper. But back in the Midwest, if someone's like, I have a lake house, you're like, it could be a one bed, one bath, dude. We could all be sleeping. And that's what my grandmother's sister rented one, one time. And it was a two bed, one bath and there was twenty six, twenty four to twenty six of us in there.

• 3:43Speaker 06

  I know it's different from like, like there are different kind of lakes. There's lakes that are, when we were on Fully Loaded, we did the Lake of the Ozarks.

• 3:51Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:51Speaker 06

  And like, those were like multimillion dollar homes.

• 3:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh dude, that's, that's big money.

• 3:55Speaker 06

  They were beautiful, but most lake stuff I've ever been to is this one, like I'm, the lakes I've been to, there's never been an attractive titty flashed, but there's been a lot of titties flashed.

• 4:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, that's what I did. Yeah. The number of titties is high. The good looking titties is very low.

• 4:10Speaker 06

  Where like all the rules on the lake are like, uh, it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission.

• 4:14Andrew Santino?

  That's exactly right. Yeah.

• 4:15Speaker 06

  You see people say things like, I don't think you can put a wave runner in a, in a lake.

• 4:19Andrew Santino?

  We'll find out.

• 4:20Speaker 06

  Yeah, he goes, they'll say something if we can't.

• 4:23Andrew Santino?

  That's pontoon life. We talked about that before.

• 4:25Speaker 06

  Pontoon life.

• 4:25Andrew Santino?

  Pontoon life dude. These are for people like you really don't give a shit about the lake. You just want to be able to drink on something that's mobile. You know what I mean? Cause you can't drink and drive anymore. Like after the eighties. I think my dad said that to me. He was like, like after the, in the late eighties, drinking and driving became like a thing you couldn't do anymore. Like into the nineties, but before that it was a fucking legit. Like my dad grew up in the south. He was like, you could legitimately ask for a beer to go. It was just like one for the ditch, the term one for the ditch. He's like, that was a very literal, could I have a beer to go? And everyone said yes. He's like, it was in the seventies. No one even questioned. Oh man, you shouldn't be driving. It was just like.

• 5:05Speaker 06

  Like you're staggering. I'll figure it out.

• 5:07Andrew Santino?

  You'll figure it out dude. Yeah.

• 5:08Speaker 06

  I like finding out those things like where those rules are like not as new as you think.

• 5:12Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 5:12Speaker 06

  Remember those facts? They would be like, it's a, what was that on? But they would always give you like, you know, it's only been. Uh, you know, it was illegal to own two umbrellas.

• 5:21Andrew Santino?

  Right, right, right, right.

• 5:22Speaker 06

  In Des Moines, Iowa until nineteen eighty-five.

• 5:24Andrew Santino?

  Right, right, right. Gay men were not allowed to show their teeth until, you know, fucking eighty-six when Harvey Milk flipped the law.

• 5:33Speaker 06

  I think there's just standard meat and potatoes butt fucking is illegal still in many places.

• 5:38Andrew Santino?

  Thank God and God bless and it's gonna stay that way. You understand us sodomites? No dude, I think, I do think actually, what are these weird laws by state? I know what you're saying. There is a couple of like wonky ones that are still around.

• 5:50Speaker 07

  In New Hampshire, it's illegal to collect seaweed from public beaches at night.

• 5:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you can't be doing that shit dude. There is, no, for real though, is like gay sex is still illegal in some states. It's gotta be. Texas, it's gotta be. And that's where they do it the most. You ever been to the mothership?

• 6:06Speaker 06

  Steers and queers, man.

• 6:10Andrew Santino?

  That's, that's, that's.

• 6:11Speaker 06

  You're probably in Texas dude, steers and queers.

• 6:12Andrew Santino?

  Steers and queers dude. That's what really happens at the little boy in the mothership.

• 6:16Speaker 07

  I think, I think sodomy is completely legal now.

• 6:18Andrew Santino?

  God bless dude. Thank God dude. We're back.

• 6:20Speaker 07

  Two thousand and three.

• 6:21Andrew Santino?

  Two thousand and three sodom- that's, that's like that though. You're like, that's not that long ago.

• 6:24Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 6:25Andrew Santino?

  It became fully legal in oh three.

• 6:27Speaker 07

  And it's a lot of states, cause it was state by state and there's a map, but most, most of them.

• 6:30Andrew Santino?

  Who was the last state to approve butt sex?

• 6:33Speaker 07

  I mean, it's a lot of in the south. It's Idaho, Utah, Texas, Oklahoma, Kansas, Missouri, Alabama, Louisiana, Florida, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, Michigan.

• 6:43Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 6:43Speaker 06

  That was one big sweep?

• 6:45Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 6:45Speaker 06

  I love they had to have the conversation like in two thousand and three. He goes, guys. Got a bit of a cold case here. Let's just knock this one off the docket. What do you say, huh? Just let people buttfuck if they want to?

• 6:55Andrew Santino?

  You know those one guy in there being like, "Look, I don't care what they do in the privacy of their own homes, but just post 9/11, I just think we should really..."

• 7:02Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 7:02Andrew Santino?

  You know what I mean?

• 7:03Speaker 06

  My grandfather asked me one thing on his deathbed, is not to push this through. And, and goddammit, I'm gonna honor his memory.

• 7:09Andrew Santino?

  He fought in the war, goddammit. Think I would've let my pops down?

• 7:13Speaker 06

  Gotta come up to a bunch of ninnies over here kissing each other on the peckers in the fucking churches?

• 7:19Speaker 07

  In Vermont, women need permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.

• 7:22Speaker 06

  Love it.

• 7:23Andrew Santino?

  You can't wear fake teeth in Vermont unless you ask your husband?

• 7:26Speaker 07

  You need permission.

• 7:27Andrew Santino?

  That's genius. Like veneers?

• 7:29Speaker 06

  What's that built off of? Like, a dick being bit off, probably?

• 7:32Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent.

• 7:33Speaker 06

  Like, definitely. He goes, "Guys, new ru- new rule."

• 7:37Andrew Santino?

  The boys gather around. Can I show you something real fast?

• 7:40Speaker 06

  Guys, team meeting.

• 7:42Speaker 07

  Alaska, it's illegal to whisper in someone's ear when they're moose hunting.

• 7:45Andrew Santino?

  I agree with that. You gotta leave people alone when they're hunting moose, dude. We talked about that the other night. Have you ever seen a moose in real life?

• 7:51Speaker 06

  Once.

• 7:51Andrew Santino?

  My cousin goes, "I've never seen one. I want to." And he couldn't believe the sheer scale of these things. Like, I was showing him and talking to him about it. He's like, "That's bullshit." I was like, "Dude, I'm telling you."

• 7:59Speaker 06

  Like, prehistoric, almost.

• 8:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's a- you saw- you see a dinosaur in real life. It's shocking how big it is.

• 8:04Speaker 06

  Yeah, well, I did, um, Chilkoo Charlies in Alaska. Did you ever do that gig?

• 8:08Andrew Santino?

  No, I never did it. It's Anchorage?

• 8:10Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 8:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 8:11Speaker 06

  Wild place. Fantastic. I mean, okay comedy shows, they kinda got the crowds, like, ready for comedy there.

• 8:18Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 8:18Speaker 06

  After a while, but like, wacky place, Alaska. But they took us to a, a nature preserve out there. And we saw- but it was all damaged animals. So it was like a mangy moose. It was like a moose with like patches of hair missing and stuff. And like a one-winged eagle. It was all these things, like...

• 8:36Andrew Santino?

  I like that you get to Timu the second rate.

• 8:38Speaker 06

  It really was. Everything in Alaska, it was just like a fucked up version of like an animal you'd never seen before. Yeah.

• 8:43Andrew Santino?

  I got the real deal in Alberta, Canada, and it was up in Banff, and it was like... We pulled over and I la- we started laughing. Like, I remember la- I couldn't believe it, I was cracking the fuck up, cuz I was like, "It looks fake, dude." Like, it looks, it looks like some shit you'd see. You know when they walk around, characters at, like, theme parks? And you're like, you know what I mean? Like, someone's walking that thing around, that's not real. There's a dude in there, operating it. And my buddy EP was like, "How close, how close should we get?" I was like, "Bro, you can get close, I'm staying right the fuck here." He's like, "Who cares, who cares?" I'm like, "Go be the guy that dies by moose." Do you know what I mean?

• 9:20Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah.

• 9:20Andrew Santino?

  Be that guy.

• 9:21Speaker 06

  No, they're probably friendly.

• 9:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 9:24Speaker 06

  I like that when, uh, anyone tries, there's a lot of videos of that in the cities, like, people trying to feed fucking raccoons.

• 9:30Andrew Santino?

  Oh, bro, what do you, yeah, that's insane.

• 9:32Speaker 06

  We're trying to touch a possum.

• 9:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude.

• 9:35Speaker 06

  I'm like, "For the possums are sent from hell."

• 9:37Andrew Santino?

  Right, right, right.

• 9:37Speaker 06

  That face, there's nothing lovable about it.

• 9:40Andrew Santino?

  Uh-uh. The raccoons, I will be, I will be straight up. I do see some videos of raccoons, I'm like, "That is a cute-looking motherfucker." Like, there was one, it had a, it had a thing of grapes. And it was just eating, eating it, like, staring at the guy, and I was like, "It is cute, until it claws you and gives you fucking AIDS."

• 9:55Speaker 06

  Latches onto your face.

• 9:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, then it's over. But the weird law thing, by the way, I remember seeing, uh, um, there was one in New York that, look up weird laws in New York. There was one when I was in New York, and I thought, "Why New York?" New York feels like it's a-

• 10:12Speaker 07

  Carrying an ice cream in your pocket on Sundays?

• 10:14Andrew Santino?

  No, that's not it, it was with something about a gun, like-

• 10:17Speaker 06

  Like, it goes, "Now that one checks."

• 10:19Andrew Santino?

  No, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 10:20Speaker 06

  He goes, "Sunday, he said Sundays."

• 10:21Andrew Santino?

  That actually makes perfect sense. Something about weird laws with guns in New York. Because I got into this discussion with a buddy, cuz in Chicago, you can have, or Illinois, or maybe it's just the city, you can have a concealed weapons license, you know? Which is insane to me, cuz it's like, their, their, their bit was, if you can't see it, you don't know who has it. Meaning, like, if the bad guy has it, well, then so, so can I. Which is like, "Yeah, sure, I guess, whatever." But also, I'd rather it be unconcealed. I, like, when I go down to Texas and I see it, it kinda make me more comfortable than not, you know what I mean?

• 10:56Speaker 06

  Oh, sure.

• 10:56Andrew Santino?

  Knowing is way better than not knowing. Cuz whenever I, whenever I see someone who has a gun on their hip, I'm always like, "Well, it's, at least I know."

• 11:03Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, instead of him reaching inside of a trench coat.

• 11:05Andrew Santino?

  Right, dude, yeah.

• 11:06Speaker 06

  You gotta stare at him in a restaurant the whole time.

• 11:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Just like, "I'm not gonna finish this Reuben, I gotta watch this kid in a trench coat."

• 11:12Speaker 06

  That's the, uh, I know, Dave Smith from Legion of the Skies, he's got a- Got like, uh, held up when we were younger. I remember when he called me and said, then just like, uh, he had, that's almost what, I don't know if that changed his politics on that at all, but like it definitely. Like he had a big like.

• 11:29Andrew Santino?

  Was this in Philly?

• 11:30Speaker 06

  No, it was in, uh, New York.

• 11:31Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 11:32Speaker 06

  He was already doing comedy and everything.

• 11:33Andrew Santino?

  Oh, okay.

• 11:33Speaker 06

  Comedy career, which was like in, like fifteen years ago, maybe more. But he, um, when he like, he came home with that kind of vibe of like, he was like, man, it goes, if I had a, like, if, if everyone was able to have a gun, that wouldn't happen to me.

• 11:45Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 11:45Speaker 06

  Like, cause they would think I have a gun, I'm like, I don't know.

• 11:48Andrew Santino?

  I don't know about that, dude.

• 11:49Speaker 06

  Yeah, they were still a bunch of black kids from Brooklyn.

• 11:54Andrew Santino?

  And you were still white Dave.

• 11:55Speaker 06

  Yeah, you were still white Dave Smith, walking with bags, looking like you probably don't have a gun.

• 12:02Andrew Santino?

  They could ask me, "Excuse me, do you have a gun?" He's like, "Absolutely not," like fantastic, "we're about to rob you."

• 12:06Speaker 06

  You think that Jewish kid with a bag of two percent milk is, uh, you think he's Holden?

• 12:12Andrew Santino?

  He looks strapped, right? No? No, I don't think so, man, I think we're good.

• 12:15Speaker 06

  I, uh, do you, are you good with guns?

• 12:18Andrew Santino?

  Uh, yeah, I, well, I grew up with them. You know, like my dad taught me how to shoot them. I see, I, I, like, I get it, Bobby's the same way, like, we, I do a jo, I tell a joke about a promoter asking us to go shoot, like, after a show in Texas. And, um, Bobby is very, very scared of guns, like, like adamantly against them. And I grew up with them because my dad's from the south, so for me, it was not a big deal, I mean, my dad's safety level was through the fucking roof, like, we couldn't.

• 12:48Speaker 06

  A lot of yellow glasses.

• 12:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we always had to wear those vests around the house. He, he kept them locked up always, he never gave me the codes, I never was allowed to even touch them without him. Like, he, he locked up bullets separately of locking up a gun. He was kind of wild about it, cause he.

• 13:05Speaker 06

  Or he really thought you or if you have siblings were gonna be school shooters.

• 13:08Andrew Santino?

  Well, my little sister, yeah, yeah, her and I, her and I bonded over that, yeah, wanting to kill everybody in the neighborhood. Actually, dude, I got in trouble when I was.

• 13:16Speaker 06

  Every time he goes to work, you guys start going like, "Let's try dad's birthday," like all the codes, "try my birthday."

• 13:22Andrew Santino?

  It's the garage code, what's the code for the garage?

• 13:26Andrew Santino?

  I got in deep shit because I brought, my dad bought me an airsoft for like, just for practicing. And I had an airsoft handgun and I brought it to school just to show like my buddy Matt. And I had it at the bus stop.

• 13:39Speaker 06

  To show him what was what.

• 13:40Andrew Santino?

  That's right. Show him who the boushy is. And then I showed it to him at the bus stop and someone at the bus stop ratted, called their mom. Said I had a gun, they called the school. I got to school, they had a cop there waiting for us to get off the bus. And I got suspended for a fucking airsoft, a BB gun. But it shot the metal pellets, not the little yellow ones.

• 14:03Speaker 06

  Oh yeah.

• 14:04Andrew Santino?

  So I guess, I don't know, whatever. I mean, I didn't fucking point at anybody, I didn't do anything. But I got suspended. My dad was like, "What are you doing bringing a fucking gun to school?" And I was like, "It was a BB gun." He's like, "What?"

• 14:12Speaker 06

  The Midwest is wild. When I was, I just remember as you said that, when I was 12. Uh, my dad lives in Ohio.

• 14:20Andrew Santino?

  Oh yeah.

• 14:21Speaker 06

  In Kent, Ohio. So like, uh, I was walking around there, I went to a pawn shop. And, uh, was able to buy, uh, a BB gun, a pellet gun.

• 14:29Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 14:30Speaker 06

  And he goes, uh, and he sold me the pellets, but like, sharp, point.

• 14:36Andrew Santino?

  Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 14:36Speaker 06

  It'd definitely kill somebody, without a doubt.

• 14:38Andrew Santino?

  It'll pierce skin for sure, yeah.

• 14:39Speaker 06

  A hundred percent could do some real major damage. And he's like, "Have fun kiddo."

• 14:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah dude.

• 14:45Speaker 06

  "Come back if you wanna steal your father's watch or something."

• 14:48Andrew Santino?

  We, dude, we were, I, I think that was, it was a normal thing in the Midwest. You knew people that hunted, you knew people with guns. It wasn't like, I don't know, it wasn't out of the ordinary.

• 14:56Speaker 06

  It makes me nervous. Me and, uh, Louis J. Gomez, we did a gig in Dallas once. He was like, "Let's go shooting."

• 15:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 15:02Speaker 06

  And we went and we got AR-15s and, uh, 9mm handguns. And I mean.

• 15:09Andrew Santino?

  Love a 9mm.

• 15:10Speaker 06

  The AR-15. Well, here's the thing, I said, "I, I just got a house recently, so I wanna get guns."

• 15:16Andrew Santino?

  Gotta get guns dude.

• 15:17Speaker 06

  I, uh.

• 15:17Andrew Santino?

  Get them all.

• 15:18Speaker 06

  I, and not only do I wanna have them, I wanna walk around my house, uh, improvising John Wick-like movements, like, in every hall, you know, the arms going different ways.

• 15:28Speaker 06

  Uh, I've got all that picked out, all the theoretical things of it I, I love and I can't wait to have.

• 15:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 15:35Speaker 06

  And pray to God someone tries me, but um, when we went to that, that range and a few things, the two times in recent history I've been shooting was that one time with Lewis, we got AR-15s and nine millimeters and a bunch of bullets. And I mean, the, when the bullets from the guy next to me started just coming over.

• 15:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, when they bounce, the casings bounce over.

• 15:56Speaker 06

  And hitting like my arm and stuff like that.

• 15:57Andrew Santino?

  And they're hot, yeah.

• 15:58Speaker 06

  Yeah, and I'm making, and then I asked the guy, uh, who worked there, I go, who's to stop these people here who I don't know from just, uh, taking the gun and turning on everybody? And he goes, he goes, that's why everybody who works here is armed. I'm like, right, but you don't know to do anything until this guy.

• 16:17Andrew Santino?

  Already kills me.

• 16:18Speaker 06

  Kills me first.

• 16:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 16:20Speaker 06

  And he was like, well, we hope it doesn't happen. And then I, I think I shot like three more bullets and I went to Lewis and I go, you can finish mine. I'm gonna go shake and smoke outside.

• 16:31Andrew Santino?

  I remember, dude, I've, I've had that, everyone that goes to a range has that thought for a second. When you see people like, huh, and you're like, what if this dude slips? You know what I mean? And is backwards? Cause by the way, those walls are pretty small between you and the next guy. It'd be real easy to fuck around and, but that's why they do keep those guys there to keep your back. They put, you sometimes they put their hand on your back. Cause if you're stupid, you'll see people kind of will go in and say something to their buddy.

• 16:54Speaker 06

  Sure.

• 16:54Andrew Santino?

  Bro, and they're, and it's like, they, they'll do that to make sure that you're not gonna put the gun back and say something to someone. But I went shooting, I went shooting with a buddy who opened for me and we both had kind of the same thought. Like there was a couple of guys in there that looked like, you know, they were fucking, they had a lot of fun, they were having a lot of fun that day. And I was like, I don't wanna be near those bays whatsoever, but I do get that. Some people get really nervous, cause you do, if you have any sort of brain, the power of it, you're like, I guess I could just kill everybody right now.

• 17:23Speaker 06

  It's so violent. That's what I said, that was my description of it. I go, I know we're just shooting at paper targets or anything, I go, but it's so, it's so loud in there.

• 17:30Andrew Santino?

  So loud.

• 17:30Speaker 06

  And just going, I was like, I don't know, it was pretty scary. And then the second time was a, was quite a day, pretty fun one. That was, uh, on fully loaded. No, no, it wasn't fully loaded, I was just opening, me and Soder opened for Bird at Red Rocks.

• 17:44Andrew Santino?

  Oh, nice.

• 17:44Speaker 06

  And we went in a day early and during the day we went, I'm sorry, it was, uh, The day of.

• 17:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 17:51Speaker 06

  One night early, the day, the day of the shows, we went out to an NFL players' house. Who plays on Tampa Bay.

• 17:57Andrew Santino?

  Can't say who.

• 17:59Speaker 06

  Um, I don't know, nothing bad, he didn't do anything, nothing bad happened.

• 18:01Andrew Santino?

  Okay, okay, okay.

• 18:02Speaker 06

  It was great, it was Ryan Jensen, but I think he does not love this story, cause.

• 18:07Speaker 06

  He says it didn't happen quite how it did, but it did. But it was, uh, takes us, it was beautiful. He's like building the house, so it's like all being done and stuff, but he's got like, nothing but, he was like driving to the shining house.

• 18:19Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 18:20Speaker 06

  Like where he lived and over the hotel and like, he had all this land and he has pumpkins set up and these big dirt hills where you can go shoot, he had a fifty caliber.

• 18:28Andrew Santino?

  That thing is fucking insane.

• 18:29Speaker 06

  It was nuts. Uh, Burt did it and shot a keg, and the keg like explodes.

• 18:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 18:35Speaker 06

  Uh, I, I shot it twice, they made me do it the second time, the second time I didn't want to do it anymore, and I did so bad, cause it was so loud the first time. When I was doing the second time, when I pulled the trigger, I was, I went like that, and they're like, dude, you're gonna break your shoulder.

• 18:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's.

• 18:48Speaker 06

  And I was like, well then make, let me stop, but we shot. I mean, all kinds of these guns, like the, like machine guns, like the, you know, automatics.

• 18:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 18:58Speaker 06

  That would go, which was, that was pretty fun. Um, but, the story has nothing to do with shooting, that's the funniest part, that it does bear repeating. Um, so they were like, you know, the, the, this couple, the guy and his wife wanted to show us all their toys and stuff, they were very excited Burt was there and stuff.

• 19:15Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 19:15Speaker 06

  And, which was cool, and then they go, oh, yeah, we'll be right back, we're gonna get the dune buggies.

• 19:20Andrew Santino?

  Hmm.

• 19:21Speaker 06

  And the wife, who's so sweet. This wife, they were so hospitable to us, but this story is just so funny, me and Soder, thank God, the two of us were together watching this. Uh, the guy comes down first in his dune buggy, and does like a burnout, he's cranking, I think Kill Shop by Eminem or something, I was like. He goes, and then he hauls ass back up the hill, his wife comes out of her dune buggy and does a burnout, and his thing just starts going ass over tea kettle, like. I mean, it does, but it does two cartwheels and then a, a head over end flip. She shot out onto the hood like, uh, like Tony Kattane in like the Whitesnake videos. And she's embarrassed, one, definitely in pain.

• 20:04Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 20:04Speaker 06

  And she was like, uh, but she, when she did it, she shot out, she was on the, on the front of the car and she was like, or the dune buggy and she goes, she's like, "Well, that was crazy, huh?" And we're like, "Yo." Like, I thought I was already rationalizing in my mind, like, we saw a death today. Like, are we doing the show still? Are we still gonna do the show?

• 20:24Andrew Santino?

  Do you do a show? If somebody dies, you gotta.

• 20:26Speaker 06

  Is it in bad taste? I mean, you gotta go do the show. It definitely dedicated to her.

• 20:30Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent. To Miss Dune.

• 20:32Speaker 06

  But then, uh, you know, when she comes out, me and Soda, I don't know, we were the only two people who saw the whole thing happen, but we were like, "Yo, she should go to the hospital," I think. And everyone's, and like, you know, like, "She's fine, dude, she's..." And then me and Soda started noticing that, like, we're there for another forty-five minutes, by the way, and she's like, "You guys want snacks?" And she just placed her hand in her pocket so her arm can just tangle. Because, well, we find out later when they come to the show, because she did undergo in the hospital, it's like some kind of a compound fracture of the shoulder that, like, it's a nine-month heal or something. It's like some crazy.

• 21:10Andrew Santino?

  Oh, my God. It's like what an NFL player would get.

• 21:12Speaker 06

  The sling wasn't like a sling like this. It was like an eight-point thing that kept it like across her chest like this when she showed up. And she still, we were like, "Yo, I knew it was terrible." She's like, "That's no big deal. Just keep this on for a couple of weeks."

• 21:24Andrew Santino?

  Her husband's like, "Downplay it. When we get there, downplay it."

• 21:27Speaker 06

  Downplay it.

• 21:29Andrew Santino?

  Don't let them know that you're hurt.

• 21:30Speaker 06

  Because I think Bert said, like, the story like trickled back to, and he was kinda like, she wasn't like ejected from the car, like, buddy, she was ejected. Every day, you should treat as a gift from here on out, because I'm telling you, you defied, uh, God.

• 21:45Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 21:46Speaker 06

  I'd almost think like Final Destination, like, it's coming for her every day. Every day, she's like, "Dude, I'm gonna turn the teapot on and also take a shower." Like, "No."

• 21:54Andrew Santino?

  No, don't do that.

• 21:55Speaker 06

  Now, that's gonna, that's gonna Rue Goldberg machine to some kind of electrocution death.

• 22:00Andrew Santino?

  Do one at a time, lady. Whenever somebody gets in one of those things, like, same thing with four-wheelers. I've done four-wheelers. I fucking flipped off one of those things, dude. You think you can control those things. You're like, "I got it." Once you start spinning out, like if it's on sand and shit, and you get tossed from them, it's so funny, it doesn't look like it hurts that bad, but when you get tossed from one of those fucking things, it's unbelievable how your body just lands wrong. Do you know what I mean?

• 22:25Speaker 06

  Yeah, no, sure.

• 22:25Andrew Santino?

  Unless you're a pro skateboarder or snowboarder, you're always gonna land wrong.

• 22:29Speaker 06

  Or a child.

• 22:30Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, well, that doesn't even matter.

• 22:31Speaker 06

  They don't brace.

• 22:32Andrew Santino?

  It doesn't matter.

• 22:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, they just, they don't brace.

• 22:33Andrew Santino?

  Right, they take the hit.

• 22:34Speaker 06

  Yeah, my little brother fell out of a second floor window and got up and rang the doorbell because he just didn't brace. He just like went down, he's like, oh, I guess we're falling, oh, landed.

• 22:43Andrew Santino?

  Fuck dude, well.

• 22:44Speaker 06

  But my daughter, I know those, I've, I've only ridden a four wheeler once or twice and never like.

• 22:49Andrew Santino?

  They're so fun.

• 22:50Speaker 06

  I'm not daredevil at all, that's what I said, I wish I had more of.

• 22:53Andrew Santino?

  Alright.

• 22:53Speaker 06

  Like, I've never been like the.

• 22:55Andrew Santino?

  As a kid, you didn't do dumb shit? You didn't jump off a dumb shit?

• 22:58Speaker 06

  Yeah, I would try the stuff and then when it would go inevitably bad, I say this applies in so many things in my life right now.

• 23:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 23:05Speaker 06

  There's so many things I can't do, cuz I don't believe I can do them. If I believed I can do them.

• 23:10Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 23:11Speaker 06

  You could do it. And, uh, but on those things, like when people would go and they find a huge hill in the neighborhood, and it's like, yo, just open the bikes up.

• 23:18Andrew Santino?

  Bomb it dude.

• 23:19Speaker 06

  Just take the bikes, take your feet off the pedals and just let this thing, and I'm like, now I'm riding the brakes the whole way. Like, I'll go pretty fast, but like, I'm looking at every driveway going like, is a car coming out of the driveway?

• 23:29Andrew Santino?

  Oh, you're saying, yeah, you're being smart.

• 23:31Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm just like, I never kinda had that, like, so I never learned how to skateboard or anything, I don't have.

• 23:35Andrew Santino?

  Never when you were young?

• 23:35Speaker 06

  Lower skate or ice skate or nothing.

• 23:37Andrew Santino?

  Dude, I love doing dumb shit. That was like my favorite thing.

• 23:39Speaker 06

  We did dumb shit, it just wasn't like, uh, like.

• 23:42Andrew Santino?

  Dangerous, I guess.

• 23:43Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, I didn't do too much danger, yeah, we did plenty of dumb stuff.

• 23:46Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 23:46Speaker 06

  But like, uh.

• 23:46Andrew Santino?

  Mine was foolish, I think about some of the shit that we did, it was like, what did we think that was? Like, you know what I mean, like, being pulled on a skateboard by, in the back of a, my buddies were sitting in the back of a bed of a pickup truck, and then we'd fucking, you know, they'd film us getting pulled by a truck and they would put a rope on the, on the hitch. It's like getting pulled by a pickup truck, like, that's a terrible fucking idea.

• 24:06Speaker 06

  Terrible idea.

• 24:06Andrew Santino?

  Down the street, why the fuck would we do that?

• 24:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, we did a lot, actually, I guess we did dangerous stuff. It was funny though, I'm, I was a good facilitator and knew the people who would do it. So we definitely, I was definitely.

• 24:17Andrew Santino?

  The instigator.

• 24:18Speaker 06

  I was definitely passenger seat of several buddies on the roof of a car while we're doing donuts in a parking lot in the snow. Like, lots of those, but it's like, they're like, Jay, you get up there. Also, excuse for many things, uh, in being fat. Uh, like also so fat when I was younger, there was several things that were like, uh, but it also got us into, me and my friends knew a lot more fights. Because if we were outnumbered or something like that by another group of guys, like if we were, if we were retreating and like, like kind of jogging away, like, at some point my jog is gonna start getting closer to them behind me than to my friends moving forward. And I said, I said my name should have been guys when I was growing up because that's all we go, guys.

• 25:01Speaker 06

  Guys, they just wanna talk to us, they said. These older kids who are definitely gonna try to fuck us up. Um, uh, uh, many times, uh, on the top of a fence.

• 25:12Andrew Santino?

  Getting stuck.

• 25:12Speaker 06

  Make a real decision at the top of the fence, like went leg over leg, like went one leg over.

• 25:17Andrew Santino?

  Jay, let's go. You're like, hold on.

• 25:18Speaker 06

  Hang on.

• 25:19Andrew Santino?

  Hold on one second.

• 25:20Speaker 06

  My baggy jeans have been pierced by the thing and now I'm stuck and now I'm terrified also.

• 25:25Andrew Santino?

  Guys is so good. Guys, guys.

• 25:27Speaker 06

  Guys, I, I.

• 25:28Andrew Santino?

  One sec, man.

• 25:29Speaker 06

  My mom, when I was getting in trouble when I was younger, just like, just fight dumb shit like that, fighting and stuff. She put me in Boy Scouts, like way too late in the game. And I just was not like, and I'm, you know, other than Philly, it was like a city, West Philadelphia was like a city. So there was like parks and stuff and like a little bit of woods, but I was never camping and stuff like that. And that first camping trip and then, uh, the, you know, I thought I was a tough city kid. The kids go at the middle, like they go, let's go for a jog because we think also there's a Girl Scouts camp, like over the way there, let's go for a jog and the counselors were like, you know, or whatever the scout leaders were like, yeah, guys, go ahead, we'll get the fire started. And then these guys started jogging. I knew this was gonna be bad.

• 26:12Speaker 06

  And in the darkest, emptiest woods. And I just eventually stopped hearing the crackle of their shoes, screaming guys. And then made my way back and just like, just went back and sat with the adults. I'm like, yeah, those guys are crazy, whatever they're doing out there.

• 26:27Andrew Santino?

  I wanted to fire, I like fire. I like fire way more than other shit.

• 26:30Speaker 06

  I go, yeah, I don't like Girl Scouts.

• 26:35Speaker 01

  In here, we pour whiskey.

• 26:38Andrew Santino?

  Hey, here to tell you about Stitch Fix. Big fan of Stitch Fix. Shopping is hard. I told you one time on this show, I took out a little bit of cash to go shopping to buy some new clothes for the emperor. And I walked into a store, I saw someone I knew, and I panicked, and I just turned around and left. I don't like it. I get freaked out. I hate shopping. I don't know my sizes. Sometimes I'm a fatty fatty, and sometimes I'm a little skinny boy. With Stitch Fix, you get a stylist who understands your style, size, and budget, and they do all the shopping for you. It's incredible. It's easy. You give them your style, your sizes, budget preferences, and then you get boxes. They just show up on your front door. No stores, no crowds, no nothing. And it looks and feels like you. They send you stuff that are very much you. You keep what you want. You send back what you don't want. No

• 27:23Andrew Santino?

  stress whatsoever. It's so easy. It's insane. I can't believe everybody doesn't do this. If you're someone who's busy, you got a lot going on in your life, or you just want to take out all the hassle of going to the store and shopping and feeling weird about changing in those extremely well-lit rooms where you can see yourself in the mirror and you're like, "Good God, no, thank you." Stitch Fix has got you covered. Give it a try. Make style easy. Get started today at stitchfix.com/whiskeyginger. That is stitchfix.com/whiskeyginger. So I got a call, and they told me, "Hey, we want to do skims on your show." And I said, "What? I'm not a Kardashian. I don't got those kind of curves. I mean, I have a nice

• 28:03Andrew Santino?

  badonkadunk." But they were like, "No, no, no. They make underwear for men." I was like, "All right, I'll take it out." I'm telling you, I love it. I really do love it. They got a great little pocket, a little pooch right there. Little pooch for the boys, for the dogs, right up front. It's so smooth. Honestly, it's very soft. It highlights you very well. It gives you a nice accent, nice curves. And it's really, really nice. It's kind of hard to find really nice underwear. That five-inch boxer brief, big fan. And if you're in the gym, you're working out, you want something that doesn't bunch and scrunch and get all tight and uncomfortable, that's why I'm a big fan of that. They got the three-inch boxer brief if you want to take a little tighter. Want to take a little tighter? Uh, they got the cotton one.

• 28:47Andrew Santino?

  Uh, and I, I, you know, I like some more comfort, some more room, uh, for the boys. But honestly, they got a bunch. Uh, they got the Skims, uh, regular cotton brief and, uh, the stretch brief, which is great too, depending on how much moving around that you're doing. But I will say, uh, underrated underwear for men. Underrated underwear for men. They sent me a bunch and I did very much like them because it is hard to find good underwear. Everybody knows that. There's something about that. I don't know why they couldn't figure it out, but Skims did a very, very good job. Uh, I've tried them all. Skims right now feels like, uh, one of the best to be doing it in the game, ladies and gents. So shop Skims men's at skims.com and Skims stores. That's S-K-I-M-S. Let them know we sent you, baby. After you place your order, select podcast in the survey and select a show.

• 29:32Andrew Santino?

  Select whiskey ginger in the drop down menu that follows. Skims is the official underwear partner of the NBA, WNBA and USA basketball. So you know it's gotta be good.

• 29:42Speaker 02

  Ginger. I like tingers.

• 29:46Andrew Santino?

  When were you, when you, when were you your biggest when you were a kid?

• 29:50Speaker 06

  So funny is like not my biggest definitely as an adult.

• 29:53Andrew Santino?

  Oh, so you weren't, cause you say you were, you weren't a fat kid.

• 29:56Speaker 06

  I was a fat kid for sure, but like in all pictures, I say by like the standards of then.

• 30:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 30:04Speaker 06

  I don't know if now that it would be that crazy, like the size I was.

• 30:07Andrew Santino?

  Well, because you're just, you're just a big dude though. You're not a fat guy. You're a big dude.

• 30:11Speaker 06

  Well, I've lost weight now, but I mean, like in my, uh, my heaviest as an adult was like 340.

• 30:15Andrew Santino?

  No way.

• 30:16Speaker 06

  Which was bad. Yeah.

• 30:17Andrew Santino?

  How long ago was that?

• 30:18Speaker 06

  Hmm.

• 30:19Andrew Santino?

  I feel like I've only known you.

• 30:20Speaker 06

  10 years.

• 30:21Andrew Santino?

  In like this kind of shape.

• 30:24Speaker 06

  Well, I've lost weight now because of the sweet science of Manjaro.

• 30:27Andrew Santino?

  God bless the Manjaro dude.

• 30:29Speaker 06

  God bless it.

• 30:29Andrew Santino?

  Bobby's on that fucking bullshit too. Is that what he's on? Which one is he on?

• 30:32Speaker 07

  Yeah, Manjaro.

• 30:33Andrew Santino?

  Manjaro? Is that right? It's not the main one.

• 30:37Speaker 06

  Not Ozempic.

• 30:38Andrew Santino?

  No, it's one more. It's not Manjaro either.

• 30:40Speaker 06

  No, it's Bulgovi.

• 30:41Andrew Santino?

  Bulgovi.

• 30:42Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 30:43Andrew Santino?

  Not Bulgogi, you fucking.

• 30:44Speaker 06

  Bulgogi.

• 30:46Andrew Santino?

  Bulgogi, yeah. He's on Bim Bim Bap. No, he's on, yeah, he's on, he's on that one, Wegovy. But it made him sick as fuck when he first started taking, no, no, no, sorry, the other one made him sick.

• 30:57Speaker 07

  Ozempic.

• 30:58Andrew Santino?

  Ozempic made him throw up like crazy.

• 30:59Speaker 06

  That's why I switched up from Ozempic to Mijaro. No, but I mean, I could of every day.

• 31:05Andrew Santino?

  Oh, bro, he puked all the time.

• 31:07Speaker 07

  He said he took four of the things at once. He did it every day, not, didn't read.

• 31:10Andrew Santino?

  He fucked up the dose the first time. Yeah, he got really sick.

• 31:13Speaker 06

  That's nuts.

• 31:13Speaker 07

  It was like a deep dive and just peed everywhere.

• 31:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he could have died. I mean, he, honestly.

• 31:17Speaker 06

  Yeah, I wonder how dangerous that is.

• 31:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, no, it is very bad.

• 31:18Speaker 06

  Which shuts off your digestive system.

• 31:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's bad. I mean, he could, he genuinely could have gone into shock. It was really bad, but he was puking from it.

• 31:25Speaker 06

  Thank God he comes from a broth-filled culture.

• 31:29Andrew Santino?

  He's so used to it. Well, yeah, in, uh, in Wegovy, they have, they have noodles inside of the syringes, so you just, it's a little, it slowly seeps into your body as time goes on. No, but the, the, look, this stuff has been helping people, but I am like, I, it does freak me the fuck out.

• 31:44Speaker 06

  Yeah, me too.

• 31:45Andrew Santino?

  How efficient it is. It's so efficient, it's unreal. Like, you can't name anything that works that fast, that good. You know what I mean, like?

• 31:51Speaker 06

  Afrin, another thing that they say is terrible for you that I'm addicted to.

• 31:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I love Afrin. Dude, clear it out, yeah.

• 31:57Speaker 06

  It's, I stopped even looking into the damage it can do and what it is doing and the rebound and all this stuff. I just know, you know, we have to broadcast constantly and I have the Sirius show, so I'm doing four shows there a week and three other podcasts.

• 32:11Andrew Santino?

  Jesus Christ. Wait, you have Legion?

• 32:14Speaker 06

  Legion Skanks, two episodes a week.

• 32:15Andrew Santino?

  You and Bobby?

• 32:16Speaker 06

  Me and Bobby are four shows a week.

• 32:18Andrew Santino?

  And then you're?

• 32:19Speaker 06

  They're the story workers.

• 32:20Andrew Santino?

  Oh, sort of, wow, Jesus fucking Christ.

• 32:22Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 32:22Andrew Santino?

  You're seven days a week almost.

• 32:24Speaker 06

  It's an, oh, yeah. And then, yeah, then I travel on the weekends, come home on Sundays, but Afrin, they say it's evil, but I'd say it's my best friend. It's because I've never had something work so, like, quickly. And it's funny, when Bargazzi did, uh, SNL, one of his monologues, he has a joke where he talks about Afrin. He's like, if you don't know what Afrin is, don't even look it up. Like, you know, saying it's such a problem. And the funny of that to me when he was telling that joke was, he was opening for me in Houston a million years ago at the Laugh Stop, and I, uh, and on the way to the show the first night, I was like, yeah, I don't know if it's my allergies or what, but like, I cannot breathe. And I was talking, you know, crazy. And they was just like, Afrin, buddy.

• 33:07Speaker 06

  And I was like, I've never heard. And then the guy who was driving us was like, you never heard of Afrin? Oh, it's great. And they took me to a CVS and I've never stopped taking Afrin since that day. A lifelong problem.

• 33:17Andrew Santino?

  Go get some Afrin. That was brought to you by Afrin code whiskey for 10% off of Afrin. We're pumping Pfizer, dude.

• 33:24Speaker 06

  But it is. That's a drug that works as good as Manjaro.

• 33:28Andrew Santino?

  100%.

• 33:28Speaker 06

  It does what it says.

• 33:29Andrew Santino?

  The effectiveness of Afrin is similar to that. I just think the wa- I've seen people transform. Like, he's slow but low. Like, he- it's working for him, for Bob. But there's a couple of people I know that I'm like, holy shit, dude. Like, it's a different human being. And it was only a month, maybe?

• 33:46Speaker 06

  And it'll save people. But I said a thing about it freaking you out. Like, it freaks me out too. That's why. It's funny, when I took the Oz- before I even took the Ozempic and said I was gonna take it, we talked about it on the radio a bunch.

• 33:56Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 33:57Speaker 06

  And we would, we'd sing the song, the Ozempic song. And then, uh, and then we got on it and like, uh, it was making me feel shitty, but also like, because we announce everything and talk so much. I was getting so many messages like, you know, my grandfather died from that exact thing yesterday. And you're like, what?

• 34:18Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 34:18Speaker 06

  And it's like, you don't, they don't give you any more information than that. So you get a bunch of those like, this stuff actually, uh, it eats your brain. I'm like, what are you talking about?

• 34:26Andrew Santino?

  Show proof. Show your work.

• 34:28Speaker 06

  Yeah. So they just like, I got tired of getting this. So when I started Manjaro, I didn't mention it right away and then just casually like, when it comes up, we would say we did it just to avoid that because like, I will live in that. So same thing with Afrin, like, I just don't look up what it does. People go, you know what that does to you? I go, no. I do, actually. It opens up my nose and I can talk again.

• 34:47Andrew Santino?

  Right, right, right. Gets me back to where I wanna be. Does Bo- did Bobby take that shit? Bobby took something, didn't he?

• 34:52Speaker 06

  Bobby, uh-

• 34:53Andrew Santino?

  Kelly?

• 34:53Speaker 06

  No, no, he got the surgery.

• 34:55Andrew Santino?

  Oh, he got the- oh, that's right. That's right. That's right.

• 34:57Speaker 06

  I know. And he got the surgery. A fucking, this would make me furious. A year before.

• 35:03Andrew Santino?

  That shit came out?

• 35:04Speaker 06

  These things came out. A year before, cuz I mean, again, we don't know what the long-term effects, I guess, of this are and if it-

• 35:10Andrew Santino?

  Same thing getting surgery, surgery can fuck you up too.

• 35:12Speaker 06

  But surgery, but you'd probably rather try that before you have part of your body removed.

• 35:17Andrew Santino?

  I guess dude, I don't know, the irony maybe, you'll probably have something, have to have something removed after the drug.

• 35:23Speaker 06

  Very possible, yeah, yeah.

• 35:24Andrew Santino?

  To me, it's like, whatever fucking works, we're here for a fucking, we're here for a short time, who gives a shit?

• 35:29Speaker 06

  So legalize sodomy everywhere.

• 35:30Andrew Santino?

  Please.

• 35:31Speaker 06

  Joe, leave that in.

• 35:33Andrew Santino?

  Before we fucking, before we cr- dude, I've been talking about these plane crashes and I don't wanna talk about it anymore, but-

• 35:38Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 35:39Andrew Santino?

  I can't get away from it because we travel so much.

• 35:40Speaker 06

  It was Delta.

• 35:41Andrew Santino?

  Dude.

• 35:41Speaker 06

  I hate that it was Delta, and I had to get on Delta this morning from Austin.

• 35:45Andrew Santino?

  I just flew back from Boston, I was like, I'm going six hours across the fucking country, this wasn't like, that one, that Delta was Minneapolis to Toronto, by the way.

• 35:52Speaker 06

  Shit.

• 35:53Andrew Santino?

  By the fucking way, we're going to Minneapolis, it's like, in two days. I just, it's one of those things where, we talked about on the other pod that I thought, yeah, man, it does feel like it's more than normal, but maybe we're just seeing it more than usual now because the media- The media is wonderful at sensationalism, and, and I was looking up how many more crashes happened in other years, you know, like, non-traditional crashes, cuz some of these were like, skidding off the runway, or, or the private ones like the-

• 36:23Speaker 06

  Like Black Hawk hit a fucking thing, and Philly-

• 36:25Andrew Santino?

  That shit's fucking crazy.

• 36:26Speaker 06

  Philly was like, transporting a girl for life-saving surgery.

• 36:29Andrew Santino?

  I mean, that's insane, like, some of these have been a little bit, so, look, it is a little bit more than normal.

• 36:34Speaker 06

  God wanted that kid.

• 36:37Andrew Santino?

  He tried every way, dude.

• 36:38Speaker 06

  God wanted that kid home.

• 36:41Andrew Santino?

  He's like, I'm not gonna let her get, I'm not gonna let her land, I can't do it, but I keep getting tripped up now cuz I'm like, are they just not fucking checking down shit, are they just getting lazier, or, or, or, what I imagine it is, the ground, the ground crews and the restrictions and all that stuff. People are, they're either getting overloaded with work and they just can't do all of it. Or the planes are reaching that tipping point when they're like 20, 30, 40 years old. And shit's just gonna, we're just seeing it happen.

• 37:09Speaker 06

  Isn't it funny though, as they're saving our lives though, when they do things like, guys, we're gonna have to deboard the plane like, you know, something's wrong with the engine. You go, come the fuck on. At that moment, if they would go, you know, we'll probably be fine with this trip. Everyone would stay on that plane and go, yeah, let's go.

• 37:24Andrew Santino?

  I wouldn't even think twice.

• 37:25Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 37:25Andrew Santino?

  It was just like, we're missing a part. And you're like, get the part. Hurry up. It's like, dude, it can be the most, it's like, yeah, this little flap that goes on the back of the wing, if it's not angled this way, it'll just tip and we'll fly, we'll die.

• 37:37Speaker 06

  I always sit and wonder though too, like, who's the person I'll be on the plane, because I'm trying to think of the possible

• 37:45Speaker 06

  deviations that we could have as people travel like every weekend, you know, a hundred flights a year.

• 37:51Andrew Santino?

  It's insane.

• 37:51Speaker 06

  You know, at least. So like, uh, you know, what are the odds of it? Something. So I've had some, I've had crazy turbulence, but it's not that. It's gonna be something more.

• 38:00Andrew Santino?

  Have you ever had a, a touch and go? You know, where they go to land, but they have to take back off?

• 38:04Speaker 06

  No.

• 38:05Andrew Santino?

  Oh, brother, I've had it twice.

• 38:06Speaker 06

  Scary as hell.

• 38:07Andrew Santino?

  Burr talked about it one time, that he said it almost made him wanna stop flying, cuz his was so fucking bad. Because the tur, the crosswind or whatever was so bad that they came in this way, and you touchdown, then you keep going. I did it in Vegas, and man, it made me so nauseous, dude, cuz I was, I was like sick in my, not from the turbulence, just like, I was gonna get sick. I was like, fuck dude, this is, we're gonna, this is not gonna, I'm crashing.

• 38:29Speaker 06

  What's something when they give you those announcements like way in the air, they go, alright guys, we're gonna circle for a while and see if we can go, but the, the landing gear's not coming down. And just like the idea of going, who are you on that plane?

• 38:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, what kind of human do you turn into?

• 38:42Speaker 06

  I think, if I'm by myself, probably a keep to myself and just be like, I don't know, but like, I also know inside, I will wanna be going like, what do we do?

• 38:56Andrew Santino?

  Can anybody help?

• 38:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, there's no real protocol for this. I know they give you a bunch of horse shit to do.

• 39:01Andrew Santino?

  What is it?

• 39:02Speaker 07

  I looked it up and it said that, uh, US registered civilian aircraft, uh, accidents, it's like 1,216 in 2023, 1,277, so that's like over three a day. So I think it's more common than

• 39:17Andrew Santino?

  Because here's why. So like my buddy went to flight school when we were in college and a lot of those little, those little single-engine Cessnas that you see a lot, like, there's way more flights than you think. It's crazy how many planes are in the sky. Those little tiny ones, like, they have little tiny accidents all the time. Not, not like crash and die, but when they land, they'll slam too hard and they'll mess up a landing gear or they'll clip a wing when they let, I mean, there's a lot of fucked up shit that happens on those little ones. And he says you, he saw it all the time. In fact, it's so common, it kinda gets them used to small little bullshit things going awry and then them figuring it out. But it's not death.

• 39:49Speaker 07

  But would that get sent to like a, a s- study that the US would have? Like, would they?

• 39:54Andrew Santino?

  The FAA has to register all that shit. Yeah. Because if you take a plane into the fucking sky, you have to register it.

• 39:59Speaker 06

  I've flown on a handful of private planes now from like other people's stuff.

• 40:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, same.

• 40:05Speaker 06

  And I mean-

• 40:05Andrew Santino?

  Other people's bills. Yeah.

• 40:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, um, I'll tell you, like, I, it's, I love the, the luxury of it is great. The comfort of it is much better and all that. But man, I can't, as someone who's afraid of flying, I'm like, this thing is a dart. Like, some of them, we, I've been on some of them where you can't stand up all the way.

• 40:23Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, when your neck is craned?

• 40:24Speaker 06

  On it, like, uh, like you have to sit immediately. And it's like cra- it's a, it's a feeling of that. It's like this thing is primed to be a problem. Yeah.

• 40:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, this is a fucking missile.

• 40:35Speaker 06

  Dark going through the air.

• 40:36Andrew Santino?

  I would much rather have the commercial, I mean, I know that sounds like a privileged perspective, but when I have been lucky enough to be on somebody else's private plane, I still get fucking weird about it, man. Like, I'm still like, man, I'd rather be on a big fuck-off plane because you feel nothing. Like me- Stavros, Theo, Schultz, we did this like fashion show thing and they did like a comedy fashion show in Paris. And they, yeah, right there, yeah. They flew us out there, Kid Super. And they were like, hey, we're gonna fly you on this Puma jet. And I was like, okay, fuck, that sounds fun. We were going to the Atlantic in the middle of the night. And I was like, fuck dude, I wish we just took a regular plane. Cause you felt every, I mean, you felt fucking everything. And it's the dead middle of the night and I was like, oh, bro, this, I, cause I, I thought, they gave us the option.

• 41:21Andrew Santino?

  They're like, if you, if you're not already in New York, you can take a commercial with me. But I was already on the East Coast. I was like, well, let's do it. But in retrospect, on the way back even, I was like, fuck dog, I don't think I'm, I don't wanna, I wanna, I don't wanna cross water again in one of those things.

• 41:35Speaker 06

  Also, whenever I get on a private plane, even when it's like tiny right away, though, I can't, I like when people get, I've seen people get used to them.

• 41:42Andrew Santino?

  Oh, dude.

• 41:43Speaker 06

  Where it's like they're still on there, like, you know, reading a paper or whatever. Like, I think the whole time, I'm still kinda like, this is nuts.

• 41:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude, I'm strapped in the whole fucking time.

• 41:49Speaker 06

  Like, are you supposed to be on this thing?

• 41:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, no. It does feel, it does feel way too lax that you get on the, and, and the pilot's like, boys, how you doing? You guys okay? We're gonna be getting out here in about three or four minutes. Uh, we'll, we'll talk to you in a minute. And you're like, nah, it's way too chill. And the door is just open and you're like, I don't like that at all, dude. Close the door, fucking close the door.

• 42:06Speaker 06

  It's way too close.

• 42:07Andrew Santino?

  I don't need to see the sausage get made, dude.

• 42:09Speaker 06

  Guys all good? You guys good back here?

• 42:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 42:11Speaker 06

  You got your couple sandwiches over there?

• 42:12Andrew Santino?

  I hate that, dude. You're like, get up there, dude. We had a guy talk to it. He was like, standing there, he's like, his son was flying, him and his son, and they own this plane. And he's like, no, no, he's good. Yeah, he's good. And I was like, ooh, dude, get up there, please. I don't, I, I just, I don't like it already.

• 42:26Speaker 06

  He's gonna do, he's gonna do the trial by fire. He goes, son, it's all yours. He leans back. He's like, dad, I don't know how to do it yet. He goes, you're gonna learn today.

• 42:33Andrew Santino?

  You'll, you'll learn, young man. Spread your wings, kiddo.

• 42:37Speaker 06

  Opens door for you guys. Boys, he's doing it.

• 42:41Andrew Santino?

  His first time, with you guys. Now, well, you know what, though? Traveling, as much as we're traveling, like, my tour's coming to an end now. So, thank God, knock on a whole bunch of fucking wood, dude. I don't know, man. You know what's funny is...

• 42:54Andrew Santino?

  I, I, every year I say I'm gonna take off more time than I do. I'm a fucking liar about that shit. I'm always like, oh, I'm gonna, and then I just end up, but for right now, I have nothing in the books until the end of the summer. We go to, we go to like, Bobby and I are playing London and Dublin. It's just two shows popped up. Um, cause I'm already supposed to be over there for something. So I was like, I could be fucking, I've never played London or, I've never played Europe.

• 43:17Speaker 06

  Ever.

• 43:18Andrew Santino?

  Never, never. I had a chance to go do, uh, Edinburgh.

• 43:23Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 43:23Andrew Santino?

  And I never, and I never could do it. And I was bummed. Did you do it?

• 43:26Speaker 06

  No, never done Edinburgh. I'm not an away from home that long guy.

• 43:31Andrew Santino?

  That's all, that's a, yeah, it's like a month and a half or something. Ari fucking loves that shit.

• 43:34Speaker 06

  I know, he love, but Ari's like, he'll, but he immerses himself in like the culture. I like, I'll be there the whole month. I just know myself. You know, it's like, you, you kinda are who you are. And like, uh, like my complaints in play, you know, I've been to South, I did the South African festivals. Amazing, amazing experience. But you're like, how was South Africa? And after, you know, I get past like, I just saw like, uh, loose monkeys. Like walking around, uh, we saw where the oceans met. We, the table mountain, this crazy thing, but really. The TV, there's nothing on TV there. Before like, yeah, before everyone had a laptop when I was out there, you know, so it was like, I was out there like at mercy of the television. And you're just like, the cable out here sucks.

• 44:16Andrew Santino?

  They need some American shows, dude.

• 44:17Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 44:18Andrew Santino?

  You need to adopt our shit.

• 44:20Speaker 06

  So Edinburgh, I look at it as that, like, I don't wanna go eating a bunch of stone restaurants. They're like, they're always gonna crumble.

• 44:27Andrew Santino?

  It's all stone. It's all fish inside a stone restaurant. Yeah, no, I, trust me, I get, like, being away from home for that long is tough for me.

• 44:34Speaker 06

  But if you're party, like I said, like, so, but Soder loves it. But I think he also said he would have gone less.

• 44:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, less time.

• 44:40Speaker 06

  Time if he, if he could go back. Cause it is fun, but I, so I'm saying, if you like, and Ari's that, Ari'll go drink every night.

• 44:46Andrew Santino?

  I can try to get immersed in the culture, but I get homesick fat. I mean, I get homesick when I'm on the fucking road, road. When I'm on the road too long. I start to get real like finicky and antsy about like small shit that you're like, dude, I just wanna be in my fucking place, dude. I wanna be, I just, this suitcase living gets fucking old as shit, man.

• 45:01Speaker 06

  Even when I did like the, like Burt's, uh, fully loaded tour there, I did all the dates on that.

• 45:06Andrew Santino?

  I know, I did four with you guys and that was enough.

• 45:08Speaker 06

  But I went, uh, you know, I could have stayed out the whole time. I think some people did.

• 45:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 45:13Speaker 06

  Would stay like out the whole, the days off, but the days off, I went home, cause I had to go work. But I mean, like. Also like, yeah, I don't know. If I was just like, you know, I mean, it'd be a day where I'm like, what the fuck are we doing out here?

• 45:23Andrew Santino?

  Dude, some of those guys, some guys can do, some comics can stay on the road forever and it doesn't even bother them and they just, I mean, dude, Bargatze, that guy, he's on the fucking, he lives on the road.

• 45:33Speaker 06

  He's doing it though, like in the mo- like, in the way it's being done, you know, you'd always do something if it's done the right way, you know, so.

• 45:40Andrew Santino?

  His is the top level of it, but he tours a fuckload.

• 45:42Speaker 06

  Of course, but Nate's got like, you know, he's got a bus. Uh, you know, I mean, he's got like a, a bus decked out the way he wants, brings the friends he wants to bring.

• 45:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 45:51Speaker 06

  And go, you know, I mean.

• 45:52Andrew Santino?

  No, that is the move. If you, if you could do that.

• 45:54Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's like I said, like same thing with Burt, it's like, he'll have his whole family and IV guy with him. So it's like.

• 46:00Andrew Santino?

  A trainer, a chef.

• 46:02Speaker 06

  Homes wherever he goes, everyone he's home with is then also on the road with him.

• 46:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. I just, I did four of those dates with you guys and I was like, it was rad, but I just bus living. We did the bus for bad friends and we'll never do that shit again. It was fucking.

• 46:13Speaker 06

  Really?

• 46:14Andrew Santino?

  Dude, I hated it. I just, I just.

• 46:16Speaker 06

  I love the concept.

• 46:18Andrew Santino?

  The idea is smart. I'm just not a bus guy. I like a, I like to fly to the city, go, go, go to the hotel, go work out, go get something to eat, then chill the fuck out and then go to the show. The bus felt like nomadic. We were no- and we also trapped, we were like on the go.

• 46:34Speaker 06

  You just reminded me by saying working out, you just reminded me that I should have worn, I didn't even pack it. I got a, a shirt that's like, uh, almost the logo from, what's the Rob Deardick Show, Ridiculousness?

• 46:46Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 46:47Speaker 06

  Like the guy crumbled over and it says Rob, Robert Ridiculousness, Bobby Kelly. Because of the video that, did you unearth that?

• 46:55Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, I did on this show.

• 46:57Speaker 06

  That is one of the funniest things of all time.

• 47:00Andrew Santino?

  Bobby was, do you remember this? Bobby was working out at the gym and he fell backwards out of the, uh, on, when he went to lay down.

• 47:06Speaker 06

  He went to decline bench and he went back with the weights and the weights just took him back and the weights went to the side and he went, he flipped his feet over.

• 47:13Andrew Santino?

  One of the greatest images I've ever seen in my title. I had tears in my eyes.

• 47:16Speaker 06

  Well, it's that, it's because then he, hands in his knees gets up and the best is off camera. He said an Indian guy was like, are you okay? And so you see when Bobby gets up, he's like trying, he's already embarrassed.

• 47:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 47:27Speaker 06

  He's getting up, trying to be like, he's like, it's totally cool. And then you see him go. There's no audio. Just give a thumbs up to the camera.

• 47:34Andrew Santino?

  But he told me, he goes, I think he asked the gym owner, or the manager, for the security footage. And they were like afraid to give it to him at the beginning because of a lawsuit or some shit.

• 47:45Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 47:45Andrew Santino?

  And he was like, I'm not gonna fucking sue. And then once I saw it, of course, I was like, you should sue. Of course. I was like, brother, that's, that's dangerous, dude, you should sue.

• 47:54Speaker 06

  The way he falls back, he never stops falling back, like.

• 47:58Andrew Santino?

  It keeps going.

• 47:59Speaker 06

  He goes, places like, I think, the guy who like, uh, you know, he's listening to for the workout, I think. You know what I mean? He's like, places on that thing, and he just goes, ah.

• 48:10Andrew Santino?

  There it is.

• 48:10Speaker 06

  Pure momentum, yeah.

• 48:12Andrew Santino?

  One of the greatest, I mean, it's like, it never stops. And his foot gets caught, his foot gets caught in the fucking, in the line of the waist.

• 48:21Speaker 06

  He'll see the thumbs up.

• 48:24Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. You alright, buddy? Yeah, I'm alright, dude.

• 48:27Speaker 06

  Oh.

• 48:27Andrew Santino?

  I do love that. And honestly, when we first talked about that and put that out, he didn't want, he was like, I don't know if I want that out. And I was like, it's going out, dude.

• 48:34Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's going out, and you should want it out.

• 48:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you have to have that out. How could you not?

• 48:39Speaker 06

  Also, how can you broadcast as much as he does and he wanted to hide that from the world? Like, are you crazy?

• 48:43Andrew Santino?

  It's so beautiful, man. It's like, you're fine, you're alive, it's funny, and you can laugh about it? Move on, man.

• 48:49Speaker 06

  He has like that, my wife and child have to look at me with respect, though.

• 48:52Andrew Santino?

  No, they don't, dude, and they never will.

• 48:54Speaker 06

  They never will.

• 48:54Andrew Santino?

  You kidding me?

• 48:55Speaker 06

  Do you remember, uh, of those four days you were on the foil loaded thing, one of the days adventures was the lazy river?

• 49:02Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 49:03Speaker 06

  But it wasn't lazy at all.

• 49:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it wasn't lazy at all.

• 49:05Speaker 06

  I forget, that was the funniest, it was supposed to be, you know, it's like, it's a two hour float. And we're like, let's roll.

• 49:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 49:10Speaker 06

  And I brought a pack of cigarettes, and I had them, I was sitting on the inner tube. And there's, it's a lazy, we hit rapids immediately.

• 49:17Andrew Santino?

  Burt lost his phone.

• 49:17Speaker 06

  Uh, Burt lost his phone.

• 49:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 49:19Speaker 06

  My, uh, what's, like, my, uh, didn't they track it down eventually? Were they even?

• 49:23Andrew Santino?

  They did, they got it. They got a guy that scuba, that like scubas for lost items in the rapids. And he fucking brought it to the show that night. It was insane. Yeah, dude, you passed me a joint, I'm thinking, oh, man, this is cake, what an easy day. We were smoking joint, we're laughing, we're all passing around, and then whoever with us was like, on the next turn, it gets pretty like heavy. And I was like, what are we talking about? I thought this was a river.

• 49:47Speaker 06

  We also had the two. Sexiest guy and girl, a real will they, won't they of the lake or the river.

• 49:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 49:55Speaker 06

  Uh, were our guides and neither of them, they were both attractive.

• 49:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they were.

• 49:59Speaker 06

  Neither of them were good at the thing. We were in heavy hedge, hanging off sticks.

• 50:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, sticks in the face.

• 50:06Speaker 06

  Like, I mean, several times.

• 50:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude, we hit the bank so many more times.

• 50:11Speaker 06

  Way more than once. Then, on those first rapids, my cigarettes just get completely douches, like washed away and my lighter gone. So now, now this, this two hours became two hours and I'm like, shit.

• 50:22Andrew Santino?

  It's a long, it's a real two hours, yeah.

• 50:24Speaker 06

  It's a long two hours with no more joints, everything was gone.

• 50:27Andrew Santino?

  Everything was gone, yeah.

• 50:28Speaker 06

  Everything was gone right away and then, um, dude, I got so mad that it was like, I was, I was real sour grapes at that point. And then, I guess it's a lazy river thing that people who are on the docks will like squirt you a soup or so or something.

• 50:42Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 50:43Speaker 06

  Which I hated that also.

• 50:44Andrew Santino?

  You got really fucking mad. People just would be on the bridges, on the overpasses, in like this park and they were just squirting people with water and laughing, but it's like a part of the cultural thing.

• 50:55Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's the thing.

• 50:56Andrew Santino?

  And we didn't see it coming. And when you got hit, dude, you, I remember you turning and going, cut it out. I was like.

• 51:02Speaker 06

  I didn't, I didn't understand.

• 51:04Andrew Santino?

  Cut it out.

• 51:05Speaker 06

  I've never done lazy river before in my life. I didn't quite understand it. I'm telling you, I made a game time decision to go in a, uh, bathing suit. In my mind, I was like, well, we're just floating down the river on a tube, right? I could just wear like my basketball shorts or whatever and a shirt. And they were like, you might get a little wet.

• 51:23Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 51:23Speaker 06

  So I was like.

• 51:24Andrew Santino?

  No, we got soaking fucking wet.

• 51:26Speaker 06

  Drenched, like hair wet.

• 51:28Andrew Santino?

  We were soaking wet. Yeah, we thought it was chill. Was not chill. We had a good time, but it was very much the opposite of what I thought.

• 51:34Speaker 06

  And then I, uh, I went to bail so I can go take a shower. So I got off like one stop before. Like they hit one beach for a second and then we're going down like a little bit further to another beach. But they were like, you can get at this beach. And I was so ready to get off that thing. And I mean, walking up, like the hill was like just jagged rock. And I was just barefooting it up there.

• 51:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we didn't plan that fuck. And then Norman showed up at the very end, the last stop. And Norman's like, hey, what's going on? Here to float. I was like, it's over. You came too late, dude.

• 52:05Speaker 06

  I think he just about faced with me.

• 52:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 52:07Speaker 06

  He just turned around and went back.

• 52:08Andrew Santino?

  Back home.

• 52:09Speaker 06

  I guess it's done.

• 52:13Andrew Santino?

  March Madness is almost here. Ooh, I'm excited. I am so very excited. I love it so very much. If you're like me, you want a little skin in the game, huh? A little something, something? A little something to wet your whistle while you're watching? You gotta download ProfitX today, okay? Not only can you watch your school advance, but you and your old fraternity bros can go against the rival's school on ProfitX and get the best odds to win. ProfitX is a peer-to-peer exchange available in 40-plus states, including here in California. On an exchange, you will get the best odds every single time, and you can even play completely for free. Download ProfitX, use that promo code WHISKY to get up to 300 in profit cash. And I'm telling you, peer-to-peer is the way to go. Don't be betting against computers and all this stuff and these third-party tertiary betting machines. Who knows? That's like playing the slots in the casino.

• 52:58Andrew Santino?

  What are you doing? You want to go up against a human? So go peer-to-peer, go up against a human right now. Download ProfitX and use that promo code WHISKY to get up to 300 in profit cash. Alright, so I got one of these Oura rings and I've been tracking my sleep at night. And I will say, from the bottom of my broken, little, tattered, swollen, probably blocked heart, my sleep with Helix has been so much better than before. I'm sleeping so much more comfortable. So, it's really so smooth. I'm not gonna lie to you, you do have a really good night's sleep on a Helix Sleep mattress. If you've never tried them out...

• 53:38Andrew Santino?

  You gotta give it a go. It is incredible. They're so soft and comfortable and they form to your body. And I really do love it because I get hot at night and the old lady, you know, she gets a little cold, she a little cold lady. And the Helix Sleep mattress keeps us even keeled, right where we need to be. It's an even split. And the best part about Helix Sleep 2, they send you these two free dream pillows with the mattress purchase now. You can, you can really up your bed game, so to speak. Alright, you wanna up your bed game? You gotta get some Helix Sleep mattresses underneath your body. Alright? Also, by the way, right now, they got a President's Day sale. This is the best offer available, exclusive for our listeners.

• 54:22Andrew Santino?

  Better than what you're gonna find on the site. This is February 21st until March 2nd, ladies and germs. 27% off site-wide. You heard me right. 27% off site-wide. Okay? Go to helixsleep.com/whiskey, helixsleep.com/whiskey. That is helixsleep.com/whiskey for 27% off site-wide.

• 54:51Andrew Santino?

  Jay has a special out right now on YouTube. Go see it. What's it called?

• 54:56Speaker 06

  Uh, it's the first part's called Them. It's Them/They. It's a double crowd work special.

• 55:01Andrew Santino?

  Double crowd work special.

• 55:02Speaker 06

  Releasing Them is out right now, February 20th.

• 55:06Andrew Santino?

  It's on your YouTube.

• 55:07Speaker 06

  On my YouTube, Big Jay Okerson. And then in April, we'll be releasing the second half.

• 55:12Andrew Santino?

  That's kinda fucking cool. So double crowd work special.

• 55:14Speaker 06

  I did it at Denver Comedy Works.

• 55:14Andrew Santino?

  Oh, is it in downtown?

• 55:16Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 55:17Andrew Santino?

  Oh, the best, dude. So you did, you did, did you film consecutive and put them out consecutive? Or was it taken from different nights and different shows?

• 55:24Speaker 06

  No, we did, uh, we did, uh, four shows with the intention just to get one special, really. And then I would be able to edit together the best stuff, but they were going so good. That room, it's that room too.

• 55:36Andrew Santino?

  It's one of the best rooms.

• 55:37Speaker 06

  Particularly in doing crowd work because there's no distraction. That phones and everybody also, all the seats facing forward is so huge there.

• 55:45Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, and it's like huddled in. It's almost like you're, you're with the Boy Scouts and you're at the fire.

• 55:51Speaker 06

  Yeah, at the fire.

• 55:52Andrew Santino?

  You're just huddled in. It's so tight and cramped, which is, that's what it's supposed to be.

• 55:56Speaker 06

  Um, but yeah, so I did, uh, and after the first night, I was like, I feel like if we just took out any kinda like...

• 56:05Speaker 06

  overlap because there is like you know it's not a a per- a perfect of like a like tight rope you could walk like crowd work like there's only so many things you're gonna say to a pretty Asian woman

• 56:16Andrew Santino?

  right

• 56:16Speaker 06

  before you're overlapping a little you know what I mean like show to show so when you take out like some of that stuff I was like we may have like four part like four like kind of small thing like release like episodically and then we went to pitch to Netflix so we were like well they would do two they're not gonna do like a four part thing so we edited it night one night two basically

• 56:34Andrew Santino?

  that's cool

• 56:35Speaker 06

  like that yeah so it's like it's I'm I'm excited about it I've never seen it but

• 56:38Andrew Santino?

  yeah yeah you don't know what it looks like but it is good

• 56:40Speaker 06

  it's good I hear it's good

• 56:41Andrew Santino?

  no but that that is that place is magical there's a couple of clubs in the country that have a little bit of magic in the walls and that place definitely does

• 56:48Speaker 06

  that one's not divisive to anybody everyone says this one's great

• 56:50Andrew Santino?

  yeah

• 56:51Speaker 06

  the one I've heard like mixed things that like a I think is great the other people are like eh American comedy company I've always thought was it's similar

• 56:59Andrew Santino?

  whereas in San Diego I think I've only done it once years ago

• 57:02Speaker 06

  it's low ceiling everyone facing forward kind of thing it's same idea

• 57:06Andrew Santino?

  it's so funny you go mixed reviews I well see I'm when I go down now if I go work out at a club I go to North County to the store because she always made us feel guilty if you weren't loyal to the store it was like such a thing back in the day you know when she it was like if you were a store comic you had to go play La Jolla and it was a privilege at some point too it was like

• 57:26Speaker 06

  I like each each coast has their Jewish lady who governs through complete fear

• 57:30Andrew Santino?

  yeah a hundred percent it is they're they're these are two

• 57:33Speaker 06

  ours is still alive

• 57:35Andrew Santino?

  not for long no I'm kidding I'm kidding I'm kidding no it's just when she was she made it like a privilege to be you know you get to go to La Jolla so it like embedded in our brains of like oh dude if you go to San Diego you better fucking play La Jolla like it's it's so funny if I don't do a theater I have to do that club

• 57:52Speaker 06

  it's amazing how caught up you can get like into the politics of local clubs and stuff I mean

• 57:57Andrew Santino?

  it's but it's a part of

• 57:58Speaker 06

  it's the thing the comedy seller like I would get phone calls when I was like young in comedy working there and needed all the money I could possibly get I had a daughter when I was twenty three so like and doing comedy so like you know I'd like make all I could and then she would tell me if it's a club that's like you know a block or two away like you can't do both clubs and she would do like the I'm not telling you like which to pick I'm just saying like you have to pick one and I was like well I kind of need the money and she's like yeah you don't have to because I would say I go well they give me like a lot more Like, you know, it's the seller at the point, like, the club I'm doing is giving me more money there because I'm in more important at that club.

• 58:37Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 58:37Speaker 06

  And the seller, I'm, I get that, you know, I mean, when I was like younger and getting in there. But you're giving, you know, you're giving me like three things a week. You know, I'm making like seventy-five dollars here a week and that place is giving me like three hundred dollars a week. And she's like, yeah. So you just gotta choose, basically, and you're like, well, I guess I'm choosing this, you know, it's like I have to take the better place.

• 58:55Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 58:55Speaker 06

  You know what I mean? So that, like, I hate that.

• 58:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, no, that's.

• 58:58Speaker 06

  Because when you get out of the. When you kind of rise above the politics of that thing right there, like, you realize like how inconsequential, like, all of it was.

• 59:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but when you're young, you have no idea.

• 59:07Speaker 06

  You're, it's just four walls, man.

• 59:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 59:09Speaker 06

  Doesn't matter which four walls.

• 59:10Andrew Santino?

  No, it doesn't matter where you do, that's what's funny, the same thing happened out here, though, a little bit. There was a little bit of, like, resentment for the improv and the store, there was a little bit of, like. You know, you, now you're, now nobody, it's kind of, the world has changed so much, nobody cares anymore.

• 59:23Speaker 06

  I mean, Janie Masada passed me, literally, I don't even think I had a particularly good set in front of him when he passed me, because I said I was Jewish on stage.

• 59:29Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's.

• 59:30Speaker 06

  Genuinely just said it, he goes, he goes, I didn't know, first time I ever heard the term. Weirdly enough, in New York as a twenty-something-year-old, he goes, I heard, so you're a part of the tribe?

• 59:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, part of the tribe, yeah.

• 59:40Speaker 06

  And I was like.

• 59:41Andrew Santino?

  You never heard that?

• 59:41Speaker 06

  Now, I mean, a zillion times since, but like, it just never caught me, so when I was like. Oh, I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I guess, and then from that moment on, like, if I came out, like, he would give me spots at the Laugh Factory out here.

• 59:51Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent, yeah.

• 59:52Speaker 06

  Because I, that was the one, they had short-lived in New York. They opened the Laugh Factory.

• 59:57Andrew Santino?

  Oh, they did?

• 59:57Speaker 06

  For, it's how, it's literally how I met Bobby. Uh, Bobby Lee.

• 1:00:01Andrew Santino?

  Where, he, at the Laugh Factory in New York?

• 1:00:03Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:00:03Andrew Santino?

  Where was that?

• 1:00:04Speaker 06

  It was right in Times Square.

• 1:00:06Andrew Santino?

  Ugh.

• 1:00:06Speaker 06

  Like Forty Second Street and, like, Ninth.

• 1:00:09Andrew Santino?

  Ugh.

• 1:00:10Speaker 06

  Or Eighth, maybe, yeah, it was such a lousy, awful.

• 1:00:13Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, terrible. It's awful.

• 1:00:14Speaker 06

  It was street teamed by the scariest black dudes with, like, gold teeth.

• 1:00:20Andrew Santino?

  Smart.

• 1:00:20Speaker 06

  It was thugs, it was thugs, barking in thugs. And they were so bad, I remember that, again, one of the most, like, hurt things I ever had. Uh, I couldn't even be, like, angry about it, I was more sad, because they always had their little laminates, the street team guys, to sell tickets. With comics' faces on it, and comics, some of them who don't work there, some of them who do.

• 1:00:41Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:00:43Speaker 06

  But they were, uh, you know, barking people like for tickets right outside the club and I got off the So rare, take the subway. I was always driving, but like for some reason I took the subway in this time. So I get off the subway, I'm walking a block and I see one of those ticket guys, he has no idea who I am.

• 1:00:57Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:00:58Speaker 06

  Which I don't care, that's fine.

• 1:00:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:59Speaker 06

  But he goes, uh, hey man, you wanna see a live comedy show tonight? And I'm seeing his laminate, I see my pictures on there. So I'm like, oh wow. So I was like, uh, I go, this'll be funny. And he's like, uh, I go, yeah, who's on? He goes, man, you gotta see this dude Dean Edwards, who I love Dean Edwards.

• 1:01:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:12Speaker 06

  To death, something to do with that. He's just pushing Dean Edwards and I go, okay, he's like, this dude was on BET's Comic View And Def Comedy Jam, dude, he's the funniest motherfucker out there. And I go, oh yeah, that's great, sounds great. I go, uh, Is, uh, is Big Jay Oakerson performing tonight? He goes, uh, He's like, nah, I don't know nothing about a Big Jay, uh, Oakerson. He's like, but, uh, he goes, Dean Edwards is blah, and he just keeps pushing it.

• 1:01:34Andrew Santino?

  Pushing Dean Edwards.

• 1:01:35Speaker 06

  And at the point where it's getting uncomfortable and I start going, uh, I go, oh, well, no, there's Big Jay Oakerson right there. Now I think when he sees the picture, he's gonna

• 1:01:43Andrew Santino?

  See it's you.

• 1:01:44Speaker 06

  Do the, he's so just in the sales mode, he goes, nah, man, he goes, fuck that dude, that dude sucks.

• 1:01:50Speaker 06

  Which is wacky to say. And he's like, uh, and he's like, nah, man, I was like, And then I had to go like, that's actually me, man. He goes, Oh shit, he's like, my man, Big Jay. He's like, I didn't mean nothing by it, man. And I was like, what did you mean by, like, what? And then I went upstairs and told the bartender, he was like the manager, this is, so this is, uh, After Laugh, when Laugh Factory took his name off of it, it stayed a comedy club, so at that time more. And they had one, the bartender was a guy basically running the place and I went and told him, I was like, Yeah, the street team's not only, uh, saying they don't know like who I am upon asking, they're saying that, uh, I'm not here tonight and that I suck. And they said it to me and the guy was like, yeah, man, those guys are wild. Like, he didn't even give a shit.

• 1:02:34Andrew Santino?

  Dude, he's like, dude, we give him ten bucks an hour, dude, shut up.

• 1:02:36Speaker 06

  Yeah, he's like, those guys are wild. Yeah, he did not give a shit at all. He's like, yeah, sorry to hear that, man, but that's how things go, I guess. But I walked away, I really like, I'm almost, I'm so lucky I didn't give him like a bitchy, like, Well, I'm gonna go upstairs and we'll see about this. I just walked away and then told anyway, but I still, Like, the fact that the guy wasn't doing anything about it was like, cause that's the fun, dude, you know Josh Adam Myers, right?

• 1:02:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, of course.

• 1:02:59Speaker 06

  Dude, I got it was one of the funniest stories. I love him so much. I got him. We went to see the Police not long ago. And I got him hyped up. When we came in, he knew somebody who worked there, like the general manager. This girl and he was like, uh, you know, we said hi to her. We already bought tickets, so we didn't really need anything from

• 1:03:17Andrew Santino?

  From, yeah, right.

• 1:03:18Speaker 06

  The general manager at all. We went and sit in our seats and then we realized these fucking yuppie jerk off people are. It's a sitting concert for sure.

• 1:03:26Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:27Speaker 06

  And then standing on some, but these people, there's some real overzealous people that are piling in the aisle. And really blocking the view for people who are sitting down. That never is gonna affect me. I don't give a shit. I'm tall. I started really like, uh, getting Josh roused up. I'm like, I'm like, yo, man, like these people, it's like so fucking rude. It's like, and it's like a Sting concert, like take your fucking seats. And then we're like, yo. Like you should call the general manager and make sure to have him send security down here to to ruffle some, you know, get these people back to their seats.

• 1:03:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:59Speaker 06

  And he's like, she says someone's coming. Someone comes down, starts shuffling people back to their seats. We repeat this about three times. And by the third time now, cause by the way Sting, he doesn't play all the songs you want, so.

• 1:04:12Andrew Santino?

  It it stinks? The show stinks?

• 1:04:14Speaker 06

  It didn't stink. No, it didn't stink at all. But you realize you're like, damn, dude, I would like to see the Police. Like it wasn't, it just like the other band members did matter. But he was good. He was good. The songs that he did that I love, like he did great. But, um, he, whatchamacallit, um, so I'm getting, uh, Josh to get these people like booted out. And now we're getting like, we're getting like, like, uh, bored at times. So like when they're booting people out, it's when like the song we don't know, it's like.

• 1:04:41Andrew Santino?

  Boot them.

• 1:04:42Speaker 06

  That would scare you. You gotta come down. So I'm booting people. And now we're doing like the like, beat it buddy, like back of the bus, motherfucker. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:04:50Andrew Santino?

  We called. We called.

• 1:04:52Speaker 06

  Very, very much so. Letting him know it's us. And then, uh. And then the next time it happens, there's a guy who's really like hanging in there. It's like ball, looks like a retired cop or something.

• 1:05:05Andrew Santino?

  Mm hmm, probably is.

• 1:05:06Speaker 06

  And maybe, and he was like, uh, sitting there taking a video for his, yeah, he probably was. He had like a younger girlfriend with him. He was like, you know, she was probably too pretty for him, you know?

• 1:05:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:18Speaker 06

  That kind of thing. So like, uh, he's taking the video definitely for her. You know what I mean? And we're like, uh, so me and Joe, we're just doing like bitchy girl shit behind him. Kind of like, oh, God, dude, like, come on. All right. Did you get the video yet? Like, come on, dude, scram. Or like, and then the guy turns around. He was like, uh, oh, no, over his shoulder, he starts giving us the finger. And we're like, oh, whoa, how dare you? It's, it's all playfully like, he's not being playful.

• 1:05:46Andrew Santino?

  No, he's serious.

• 1:05:47Speaker 06

  And he believes we're being serious, which is by intention, I assume. Like, we are definitely being dicks on purpose.

• 1:05:53Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 1:05:54Speaker 06

  Um.

• 1:05:54Andrew Santino?

  But it's harmless bullshit.

• 1:05:55Speaker 06

  It's harmless bullshit.

• 1:05:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:56Speaker 06

  One of the most boring songs of Sting.

• 1:05:58Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:59Speaker 06

  So like, um, and then when he's like walking away, he starts going like, uh, you know, like, yeah, we're still like doing like jawing. But we're jawing like a, like a fucking hockey game or something, you know what I mean? Get out of here, you piece of, you know? And, uh, he's like, he's like, yeah, and he's like, fuck you guys. He's like, you know, so like, uh.

• 1:06:15Andrew Santino?

  Ready to fight.

• 1:06:16Speaker 06

  I go to Josh, I go, dude, you should have that guy kicked out. He just threatened to fight us or whatever. And he's like, yeah, you think I should? And I was like, you should, dude. You should go kick him out. And then he's like, uh, he's like, yeah, fuck that shit. Yeah, I'm gonna fucking get him kicked out. So, uh, he's like, I'm gonna go talk to the girl.

• 1:06:36Andrew Santino?

  To the general manager?

• 1:06:37Speaker 06

  To tell her you're gonna talk to her. Unannounced and with no, I probably, I'm actually not good at pranks, so I probably would have told him not to do this.

• 1:06:47Andrew Santino?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:06:47Speaker 06

  But he did it. As he walks by the guy, he gives him like a, that's cool, buddy. No worries, man. You're gonna be able to be kicked out in five minutes.

• 1:06:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, Josh.

• 1:06:55Speaker 06

  Josh goes and finds the girl and he comes back and he was like, he's like, it's being handled. And then he goes, and I mean, we're there for another forty five minutes and every time we stand up for anything, I just look back. The guy's just totally there, blowing his kisses still and stuff. And like, they didn't even sort of kick him out. Like, that general manager eventually got to the point of like, all right, man. Like, it's like, what are you?

• 1:07:17Speaker 06

  Hey, we're here to clean up this fucking, this theater.

• 1:07:20Andrew Santino?

  This Sting concert's gotta be tight.

• 1:07:22Speaker 06

  We're taking this shit back.

• 1:07:23Andrew Santino?

  We gotta keep it legit. I do love how influenced Josh is. You say one thing and he's like, "Really? Yeah?" You think? You're like, "Yeah, dude, do it. Yeah, fucking, you have the power, man. You know the GM."

• 1:07:33Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 1:07:34Andrew Santino?

  Throw them out.

• 1:07:35Speaker 06

  I go, "Buddy." He likes to, "Buddy, you know the GM. Get this guy removed. He's not gonna talk to us like that." You see the way that guy talked to us?

• 1:07:44Andrew Santino?

  I do love the guy blowing kisses to you. It's such a great fuck you. Such like, "Yeah, go fuck yourself."

• 1:07:48Speaker 06

  That was a wild night all around. Then we left there and decided to get dinner at a diner near Josh's place. And I mean, I was, I received all of the energy of someone who enacted a hate crime, when that was never the case at all. But I mean, I guess, this is the most falsely accused insanity I've ever seen. We went to sit at this diner, and where they happened to sit us, we're sitting across from a, it's a couple. It looks to me like a, kinda like a cute, campy, like camp counselor chick.

• 1:08:30Speaker 06

  And a goth guy. Looks like Marilyn Manson's guitarist.

• 1:08:34Andrew Santino?

  It's like a Lifetime movie or something, yeah.

• 1:08:36Speaker 06

  And they were like, making out heavy.

• 1:08:39Andrew Santino?

  I love that.

• 1:08:40Speaker 06

  Whatever.

• 1:08:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, sure.

• 1:08:41Speaker 06

  They're making out heavy. And then we're trying to put in food. I mean, it's like, obnoxious. They go, but again, it is what it is. But then, they start like positioning at one point, and he starts like, really like, the goth guy's like really rubbing like her pussy over her pants.

• 1:08:57Andrew Santino?

  Whoa.

• 1:08:58Speaker 06

  You know, like, pretty aggressively. And it's like, but then they stopped after like a minute or two of that. And we're just kinda doing like the, "Jesus, this is crazy."

• 1:09:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:05Speaker 06

  These two are nuts. And then our food's coming, and then they start making out again. And it's like too passionate for a booth at a diner, when there's people. But here's the thing, the people, they're in one of the booths against the wall. So you know, and they're both sitting on one side.

• 1:09:21Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:22Speaker 06

  No one's on the other side of that. The next set of booths, the people are facing away.

• 1:09:27Andrew Santino?

  Right, they don't see it.

• 1:09:28Speaker 06

  And the people behind them are, so no one's seeing this display.

• 1:09:32Andrew Santino?

  Except for you guys.

• 1:09:33Speaker 06

  Except for us. Hard. Or no one else gives a shit. I don't really give a shit ultimately. It's just like when the food comes though and they're like, and then he same thing like she like positions in a certain way like sits outward. Like facing away out of the booth where he's now again like rubbing her pussy over her pants again. And I just went after I was like, yo, come on. And they were, the girl was like, oh my god, like what? I'm like, it's cra- you guys like fucking at the table. I'm like, that's wild.

• 1:10:01Andrew Santino?

  Trying to eat dude.

• 1:10:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm like, it's a bit much. And then he goes, oh my god. And it's like, and she's, she's, you know, aghast, you know, and the guy is just kind of sitting there.

• 1:10:12Speaker 06

  And uh, it's like a skinny guy, you know what I mean? So it's not an intimidating situation, but I'm also like, I'm not trying to fight you guys. It's like, let's chill a little bit.

• 1:10:20Andrew Santino?

  Stop fucking in the booth.

• 1:10:21Speaker 06

  Stop fucking in the booth.

• 1:10:21Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:22Speaker 06

  Towards me.

• 1:10:22Andrew Santino?

  I, I wanted so bad for this story to have Josh go, yeah, I'm gonna call the GM dude. Get these people kicked out of this fucking restaurant.

• 1:10:30Speaker 06

  What's funny was, is what Josh did was Josh walked away to change his order at the diner. Uh, when I do the like, come on.

• 1:10:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He leaves you solo.

• 1:10:42Speaker 06

  So, uh, yeah, so when he comes back, it's already full throws when he comes back of kind of jawing back and forth, but not like really, I'm not. Really even being shitty. I'm just like, you know, you guys are being ridiculous.

• 1:10:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:52Speaker 06

  Like you're being ridiculous.

• 1:10:53Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:10:54Speaker 06

  And then, and then eventually, and uh, she comes back and Josh goes, uh, or no, while we're jawing, Josh goes back and goes. Should I go with French toast or Monte Cristo? Just oblivious though, which is great. And uh.

• 1:11:09Andrew Santino?

  Your Josh impression by the way is very good.

• 1:11:11Speaker 06

  Thank you.

• 1:11:11Andrew Santino?

  I rarely hear a Josh Adamire's impression that's good like that. French toast, Monte Cristo.

• 1:11:17Speaker 06

  Come on, we can do it. Yeah, you can. Um, so Josh comes back and then, you know, it was like bickering, I guess a little bit. And then the girl just hits us with, she goes. Would you have, would you have said something if we were a straight couple? And I was like, and then it's like coming clear, I go, oh, that's like a guy, girl. Like it's like.

• 1:11:42Andrew Santino?

  Cause I thought you said they were straight.

• 1:11:45Speaker 06

  That's what I said. So I was like, yeah. So when they were like, I did, I was like, I thought it was a couple. And then when she said it goes, we have a straight couple. And I go. Oh, I'm like, I thought that was a guy.

• 1:11:56Speaker 06

  And then, that was inflammatory.

• 1:12:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, right, yeah. If you didn't think it was bad then.

• 1:12:03Speaker 06

  And then, so whatever, they turn around and they're like, and then the girl says something this and I go, she kept looking over at one point, like, now it's so uncomfortable and we're eating. And then they go, they ask us if we would like to move our tables, like this, you guys move your table and I'm like, no. Like now it's like the point like, no.

• 1:12:18Andrew Santino?

  We stay.

• 1:12:19Speaker 06

  No, I'm staying right here.

• 1:12:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we stay.

• 1:12:20Speaker 06

  I'm like, they can move, they want, and then the girl's looking, I go, I don't, you stopped doing what you were doing.

• 1:12:24Andrew Santino?

  Eat.

• 1:12:25Speaker 06

  I don't give a shit. Like, I don't have like a long-term problem. And then, this is where smoking kills me again. I'm like, yeah, I'm gonna go smoke a cigarette, it's a little uncomfortable in here.

• 1:12:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:34Speaker 06

  I actually wanna leave. Josh also wants to order, this place has like, the milkshakes where they put like a piece of cake on top of a milkshake and then like a cannoli sorted through it.

• 1:12:43Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:12:44Speaker 06

  He's like, come on, we gotta try one. You're like, just order it and then, we'll go outside and I can smoke a cigarette, we'll come back in for it. So we go outside and while we're outside, I'm watching it happen. I'm just watching, now that I'm out of the room, the telephoning of the, the story, the narrative is being changed heavy. It's that this was done because they are,

• 1:13:04Andrew Santino?

  Gay.

• 1:13:04Speaker 06

  Uh, they, uh, yeah, trans, whatever it was, yeah, not straight couple,

• 1:13:09Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:13:09Speaker 06

  is the problem. And I'm seeing the people turn around and kinda going like, what is this? Just terrible. The guy,

• 1:13:16Andrew Santino?

  Watching you smoke.

• 1:13:18Speaker 06

  That's the best, so it's funny is, uh, then I see that the host is now mean eyeing me.

• 1:13:23Andrew Santino?

  Oh, right.

• 1:13:24Speaker 06

  Very gay.

• 1:13:25Andrew Santino?

  It gets to the host? It's tough if it gets all the way to the host.

• 1:13:28Speaker 06

  It's a small place.

• 1:13:28Andrew Santino?

  Oh, okay.

• 1:13:29Speaker 06

  It's the host is mean eyeing me now. Oh, everyone in this place definitely saw this thing happen, it's very small. And the host, uh, the host is like meaning, very gay guy, he's, now he thinks I'm homophobic.

• 1:13:40Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm. But you are, but he doesn't need to know that.

• 1:13:43Speaker 06

  No, I didn't bring that into the diner.

• 1:13:44Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:13:45Speaker 06

  And then I see at one point, he goes up and gives like,

• 1:13:49Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 1:13:49Speaker 06

  Something he puts on the table, of the couple that I was bickering with. He puts it on the table, and I was like, oh my god, I, I, and I'm like, I'm kinda saying this out loud too, like, I'm like, oh my god, like, They're giving them like condolence gifts because of how they were treated so terribly. It's so fucking ridiculous, like, they're not babies. Everything's fine, they were fucking, I think, while I'm saying that, the gay guy comes over, the host, and that's just the way he puts down wet naps for everybody at the end of their meal. I thought he gave them a special present. I go, "Oh, okay, so the gays get to wash their hands." I didn't know what it was. I thought he gave them like coupons or something, "Come back another time", or some shit. I just couldn't see on the table what he put down. I go, "Oh, he's giving them presents now."

• 1:14:33Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:14:34Speaker 06

  "I'm sorry they were hurt so bad." "Oh, I get it too."

• 1:14:36Andrew Santino?

  Hate crime gifts?

• 1:14:37Speaker 06

  Everyone gets a wet nap with your fucking cake milkshake.

• 1:14:42Andrew Santino?

  Well, I gotta tell you, send one message for me to Josh Adam Myers, the pink hair man.

• 1:14:47Speaker 06

  I'll see him tonight.

• 1:14:48Andrew Santino?

  I love it. I think it's, someone showed me a picture. I was like, "Who is that?" And they're like, "Josh." I was like, "What?"

• 1:14:54Speaker 06

  Bobby Kelly calls Josh one of my children.

• 1:14:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:57Speaker 06

  Uh, because we hang so much, and so when Josh heard that, he texts me the next day of the picture, he goes, "Since I'm one of your kids," and he's standing with the pink hair.

• 1:15:04Andrew Santino?

  I love him, dude.

• 1:15:05Speaker 06

  He's going for it.

• 1:15:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you have to. If you're gonna do it, you might as well do it, yeah.

• 1:15:08Speaker 06

  Bring your dog if you're wearing, paint your hair.

• 1:15:10Andrew Santino?

  I love that fucking dude. Um, listen, I appreciate you, dude. Uh, so funny. Uh, please go watch the special on YouTube, the link will be in the description down below. And this one's out, the second one comes out in a month, right?

• 1:15:24Speaker 06

  April.

• 1:15:24Andrew Santino?

  April.

• 1:15:25Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:15:25Andrew Santino?

  Um, go watch them both, please. Uh, continue to support live comedy. If you're, are you on tour? Or you're still touring around, or what?

• 1:15:32Speaker 06

  Yeah. Yeah, Big J Oakerson's Peter North American Tour, coming on a city near you.

• 1:15:36Andrew Santino?

  I love that.

• 1:15:37Speaker 06

  It's a long poster.

• 1:15:37Andrew Santino?

  That is a long poster. Uh, go to bigjogerson.com?

• 1:15:42Speaker 06

  Uh, bigjcomedy.com.

• 1:15:43Andrew Santino?

  Bigjcomedy.com.

• 1:15:44Speaker 06

  All my dates are up there, yeah.

• 1:15:45Andrew Santino?

  All the dates are gonna be up there. Go support. Uh, we end the show the same way. You look into that camera, say one word or one phrase to close us out whenever you're ready.

• 1:15:53Speaker 06

  Cock.

• 1:15:56Speaker 01

  In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 1:16:01Speaker 03

  You're that creature in the ginger beard! Sturdy and ginger.

• 1:16:05Speaker 04

  Like feathers, the ginger gene is a curse.

• 1:16:07Speaker 05

  Gingers are beautiful. You owe me five dollars for the whiskey and seventy-five dollars for the horse.

• 1:16:13Speaker 03

  Ginger, oh hell no.

• 1:16:14Speaker 02

  This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers.