Homophones, Things That Scare Us, & TV We’re Loving

Come see BNC live! https://linktr.ee/bnclive Pre-order Phoebe Berman’s Gonna Lose It: https://sites.prh.com/phoebe-bermans-gonna-lose-it SUBSCRIBE TO THE BNC CHANNEL: https://bit.ly/45Pspyl Ad Free & Bonus Episodes: https://bit.ly/3OZxwpr This week, Brooke and Connor are learning so much about the English language, getting scared on main, and absolutely loving TV right now. Plus, Brooke tries to help Connor find his next boy book read and Connor explains his black eye. Join our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/5356639204457124/ Bath & Body Works candles not only smell amazing, but are crafted with premium, lead-free wicks for a clean, safe burn. Shop the White Barn Neutrals collection now at https://bathandbodyworks.com! Head to https://www.squarespace.com/BANDC to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code BANDC. Thanks to Article for sponsoring this podcast! Article is offering our listeners $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. To claim, visit https://www.article.com/discount/bnc and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at https://RocketMoney.com/BANDC B+C IG: https://www.instagram.com/bncmap/ B+C Twitter: https://twitter.com/bncmap TMG Studios YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/tinymeatgang TMG Studios IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtmgstudios/ TMG Studios Twitter: https://twitter.com/realtmgstudios BROOKE https://www.instagram.com/brookeaverick https://twitter.com/ladyefron https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyefron CONNOR https://www.instagram.com/fibula/ https://twitter.com/fibulaa https://www.tiktok.com/@fibulaa Hosted by Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, Created by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood, and Produced by TMG Studios, Brooke Averick & Connor Wood. Chapters: 00:00 Homophones & Diphthongs 03:04 New IG Follower 08:29 Twitter Scaries 14:33 Psycho Neighbor 17:20 Bath & Body Works 18:36 SquareSpace 19:52 Connor’s Move 20:40 Screw April Fools 23:41 Something Bad Is Going to Happen 26:56 Boy Books 31:33 Adult Book Fair 34:20 School Stories 36:58 Article 38:38 Rocket Money 39:52 Brooke’s Book Store 45:02 Turkey Legs 47:13 John Green’s New Book 49:32 Love Story Season 2 54:49 Everything is a Joke 59:55 Matthew Morrison 1:03:47 Business Plan 1:06:03 See You In Bonus!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

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• 0:56Speaker 00

  Shop Folgers instant coffee and more at your nearest retailer.

• 1:07Connor Wood?

  Did you know "hear, hear"? You know, when they were like trying to sell newspapers?

• 1:13Brooke Averick?

  I thought that was like if you're in a courtroom, like "hear, hear."

• 1:16Connor Wood?

  Oh. "hear, hear."

• 1:19Brooke Averick?

  I think you're thinking of "extra, extra."

• 1:20Connor Wood?

  Oh, I was. Well, what does that mean?

• 1:25Connor Wood?

  "hear, hear."

• 1:26Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, what does "extra, extra"?

• 1:28Connor Wood?

  Okay, well, hang on, because like I was about to explain something that like I was I had a complete misunderstanding about.

• 1:33Brooke Averick?

  "hear, hear" is like, pay attention to me.

• 1:35Connor Wood?

  "hear, hear" is like H-E-A-R. H-E-R-E.

• 1:41Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 1:42Connor Wood?

  Yes. "hear, hear." "hear, hear."

• 1:45Brooke Averick?

  Oh, oh, oh, oh.

• 1:47Connor Wood?

  How amazing!

• 1:48Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:49Connor Wood?

  How amazing is that?

• 2:08Brooke Averick?

  What are those words called that sound the same that are spelled differently?

• 2:11Connor Wood?

  Homophobe.

• 2:12Brooke Averick?

  Homophone, yes. Homophobes, absolutely.

• 2:16Connor Wood?

  Because they are all, they sound the same.

• 2:18Brooke Averick?

  Do you know what a diphthong is?

• 2:22Connor Wood?

  Tell me a thing or two about the diphthongs.

• 2:24Brooke Averick?

  I just remember-

• 2:24Connor Wood?

  Is that from skims?

• 2:25Brooke Averick?

  No, it's from my linguistics class in college and I just remember like no one else was laughing when we were learning about diphthongs. It's like when two letters come together to form a different sound. So like "oi" is a diphthong, like oil, like oi, like oi together, like make that new sound.

• 2:45Connor Wood?

  But all letters put together make a new sound?

• 2:47Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, but it's like, usually you can separate it letter by letter and like sound it out.

• 2:52Connor Wood?

  In the alphabet.

• 2:53Brooke Averick?

  You know? Okay, Connor, you can do Connor. Like that makes sense. But like you would not be able to separate oil by its like-

• 3:00Connor Wood?

  Or like gash?

• 3:03Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, the "ue" there might be-

• 3:05Connor Wood?

  It's like an "e."

• 3:06Brooke Averick?

  If that's possible.

• 3:07Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 3:08Brooke Averick?

  All I know is that "oi" is a diphthong.

• 3:10Connor Wood?

  Oui oui?

• 3:12Brooke Averick?

  Ah oui. Bien, bien sûr. I was talking to myself in French today on the way here.

• 3:16Connor Wood?

  Tell me about it.

• 3:19Brooke Averick?

  I don't really know what I was saying.

• 3:20Connor Wood?

  Talk to me, talk to me.

• 3:22Brooke Averick?

  But I took French in high school. A lot of people don't know that.

• 3:25Connor Wood?

  We do, well, we do know it and if you listen to the bonus.

• 3:28Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 3:29Connor Wood?

  We learned a lot about that class.

• 3:31Brooke Averick?

  A lot of people know that, yeah. So I was just talking to myself in French, no big deal.

• 3:36Connor Wood?

  What were you saying?

• 3:37Brooke Averick?

  I don't remember, but I was like, I think I was actually just trying to translate a song. I think I could get a few words, which is always exciting when you're, when you're able to do that.

• 3:47Connor Wood?

  Hear, hear. Listen to my French.

• 3:49Brooke Averick?

  Ecoutez.

• 3:51Connor Wood?

  Uh, that's like when the vegetables come out at a restaurant. You can order them separately.

• 3:57Brooke Averick?

  Crudités.

• 3:57Connor Wood?

  Crudités.

• 3:58Brooke Averick?

  Nice.

• 3:59Connor Wood?

  Homophobe.

• 4:00Brooke Averick?

  Hi, homophobe.

• 4:02Connor Wood?

  Oh mama.

• 4:04Brooke Averick?

  Do you want to play a really quick game?

• 4:06Connor Wood?

  Oh my God, right to the game. Three minutes and 11 seconds 10.

• 4:09Brooke Averick?

  Do you?

• 4:10Connor Wood?

  Yeah, always.

• 4:11Brooke Averick?

  Guess who, 20 questions, followed me on Instagram?

• 4:15Connor Wood?

  Wow, okay. Is it a woman?

• 4:19Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 4:21Connor Wood?

  Are they a boy?

• 4:22Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 4:23Connor Wood?

  Well, okay. Are they a musician?

• 4:27Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 4:29Connor Wood?

  Are they, is he someone that you've been a fan of?

• 4:33Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 4:35Connor Wood?

  Um.

• 4:38Connor Wood?

  Is he someone that's been talked about on the podcast?

• 4:40Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 4:40Connor Wood?

  Is he someone that's been talked about on the podcast frequently?

• 4:44Brooke Averick?

  I would say.

• 4:46Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 4:47Brooke Averick?

  Like, maybe not frequently, but I definitely talk to, I definitely speak about this person. This man.

• 4:53Connor Wood?

  Yeah. Is he on Broadway?

• 4:56Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 4:59Connor Wood?

  Do I, am I familiar with his work?

• 5:01Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. Eh, yeah.

• 5:04Connor Wood?

  Okay. My gosh.

• 5:08Connor Wood?

  Oh my, see, like, this is where I get s-

• 5:10Brooke Averick?

  Maybe not, but like, you know who they are.

• 5:11Connor Wood?

  Like, when I get to artist, young man.

• 5:15Connor Wood?

  Oh, I guess, is he younger than us?

• 5:17Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 5:18Connor Wood?

  He's older than us?

• 5:19Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 5:20Connor Wood?

  And he's not on Broadway, and he's a musician?

• 5:25Connor Wood?

  Is he a throwback?

• 5:26Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 5:27Connor Wood?

  Type beat? Um.

• 5:32Connor Wood?

  And it's not Justin Timberlake?

• 5:33Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 5:39Connor Wood?

  Is he like a household name?

• 5:41Brooke Averick?

  To some people.

• 5:42Connor Wood?

  Okay, like, I'm not gonna get it.

• 5:44Brooke Averick?

  I don't think he would be in your household, but he was a household name in my household. In a huge way.

• 5:51Brooke Averick?

  A lot of families.

• 5:54Brooke Averick?

  Would consider him a household name.

• 5:55Connor Wood?

  Josh Groban?

• 5:57Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 6:01Brooke Averick?

  But I, like, that's, that's a good path that you're on.

• 6:04Connor Wood?

  Is it a musical type of person?

• 6:08Brooke Averick?

  The musician?

• 6:09Connor Wood?

  Like, a musicals, on, like, Broadway type?

• 6:11Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 6:13Connor Wood?

  So, a Michael Bublé?

• 6:14Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 6:16Connor Wood?

  Or a dollar name. A man. Um.

• 6:23Connor Wood?

  Man, I don't, can I give up?

• 6:25Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 6:27Connor Wood?

  Is he taller than me?

• 6:29Brooke Averick?

  I don't think so.

• 6:31Connor Wood?

  Is he on TV?

• 6:32Brooke Averick?

  Not right now.

• 6:33Connor Wood?

  Okay, see, like, if this person has fallen out of...

• 6:37Brooke Averick?

  That's a good question.

• 6:38Connor Wood?

  Has this person fallen out of the spotlight?

• 6:40Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 6:41Connor Wood?

  Okay, then I probably wouldn't know.

• 6:43Brooke Averick?

  Yes, you would.

• 6:44Connor Wood?

  If he's not a household name, he's not currently in the spotlight.

• 6:46Brooke Averick?

  He has a household name to a lot of households.

• 6:48Connor Wood?

  To a lot of households. Is he Jewish?

• 6:50Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 6:52Brooke Averick?

  But think about, like, what makes a household?

• 6:55Connor Wood?

  What makes a household? Um, like, TV?

• 6:57Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 6:58Connor Wood?

  Okay, so this person was, was on TV?

• 7:00Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 7:00Connor Wood?

  Was this person in a sitcom?

• 7:02Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 7:04Connor Wood?

  Um, was this person on the news?

• 7:06Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 7:07Connor Wood?

  Was, what is, okay, not on the news, not on a sitcom, was this person on reality television?

• 7:13Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 7:14Connor Wood?

  And did you, this person is a musical artist and he's on reality television? And he's out of the spotlight now, but who is a reality person that was on? Was in music?

• 7:27Brooke Averick?

  I also want you to reframe the way that you're thinking about reality TV.

• 7:34Brooke Averick?

  Like, I don't know that you would call this reality TV, actually.

• 7:36Connor Wood?

  Like, I'm not thinking, like, um, I'm not thinking of, like, um...

• 7:44Connor Wood?

  Like, I'm not thinking of, like...

• 7:46Brooke Averick?

  Think about if we were playing that game where we try to get to the same word, and I, and you did reality TV, and I did music, what would come out of you?

• 7:56Connor Wood?

  Like, the masked singer?

• 7:58Brooke Averick?

  Think about it, yes.

• 8:00Connor Wood?

  In the past?

• 8:00Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 8:01Connor Wood?

  Like, American Idol?

• 8:02Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 8:03Connor Wood?

  Okay, I'm seeing, I'm seeing, I'm seeing, I'm seeing, American Idol, um, oh my gosh, wait, hang on. And he's not a judge?

• 8:11Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 8:11Connor Wood?

  No, he was a contestant.

• 8:12Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 8:12Connor Wood?

  Did he win?

• 8:13Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 8:14Connor Wood?

  Is he gay?

• 8:15Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 8:15Connor Wood?

  Oh, all right, I'm gonna get there. Uh, what's his name? What's his name? What's his name? What's his name?

• 8:24Brooke Averick?

  You know it.

• 8:24Connor Wood?

  I do know it. Um, frick.

• 8:30Connor Wood?

  Ah, crap. And he was one of your first loves, right?

• 8:34Brooke Averick?

  My first love.

• 8:35Connor Wood?

  Okay, I know who it is.

• 8:36Brooke Averick?

  That was a person.

• 8:36Connor Wood?

  And you had a something for a something, right? It was almost a saying that... Clay Aiken?

• 8:41Brooke Averick?

  Yes, yes, yes, yes!

• 8:43Connor Wood?

  You had an Aiken for Clay Aiken, yeah.

• 8:45Brooke Averick?

  Very good job, Connor.

• 8:47Connor Wood?

  Yeah, okay. Clay Aiken followed you on Instagram?

• 8:50Brooke Averick?

  I mean, I screamed.

• 8:52Connor Wood?

  From the rooftops?

• 8:54Brooke Averick?

  From the rooftops.

• 8:55Connor Wood?

  Wow, how exciting for you.

• 8:56Brooke Averick?

  What a treat. I wonder what it was that he saw.

• 9:02Brooke Averick?

  You know?

• 9:03Connor Wood?

  There's no telling, but I'm... There's been a number of... He could have seen any...

• 9:07Brooke Averick?

  Oh, it could have been anything. My guess is that it was this clip of me and Brittany talking about who made us women.

• 9:13Connor Wood?

  That's the clip I think of.

• 9:14Brooke Averick?

  And I said Clay.

• 9:15Connor Wood?

  Sorry, I yelled.

• 9:16Brooke Averick?

  So, yay!

• 9:18Connor Wood?

  Okay, that's really special. Have you guys communicated at all?

• 9:21Brooke Averick?

  No, but I'm just like, that is like amazing to me.

• 9:26Connor Wood?

  That's so awesome. Happy for you.

• 9:28Brooke Averick?

  Thank you.

• 9:29Connor Wood?

  As always. Oh, happy Passover.

• 9:31Brooke Averick?

  Oh my God, happy Passover.

• 9:32Connor Wood?

  I got like, there's no point in when I'm like, oh, I got you this, but I forget to bring it. I got you a card at Trader Joe's. Said happy Passover.

• 9:40Brooke Averick?

  That's so nice, because I didn't even know it was Passover until you said that. I'm so disconnected. It's so sad.

• 9:46Connor Wood?

  I'm so locked in.

• 9:47Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, thank you for celebrating my culture with me.

• 9:51Connor Wood?

  You know what I think's been happening to me recently is like, I am having another era of just like, I am taking in, consuming so much media. Like across the board.

• 10:05Brooke Averick?

  Like on your phone or on the TV or everything?

• 10:07Connor Wood?

  Everything. Like, it's really crazy. I think it's because I'm in like a doldrum type beat, not depressed, just like, like had a, had a, had a busier...

• 10:16Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 10:17Connor Wood?

  Period of my career. But I'm not like cool with taking in stuff. I told you yesterday, I was like, we recorded something yesterday and I got home. It was like a big drive and I got home and I was like, oh, I'm already done with everything until we record tomorrow.

• 10:33Connor Wood?

  And I couldn't even get ahead on anything because I'd already gotten ahead on everything.

• 10:37Brooke Averick?

  The fact that like that's your like uneasy feeling and that's my like heaven is a place on earth with you.

• 10:45Connor Wood?

  Oh, I texted her like I'm kind of freaking out. I'm I'm it's like 6pm and I'm like kind of done with my day and she was like, oh, how nice. And I was like, no, I'm gonna like walk somewhere really far.

• 10:58Brooke Averick?

  That yeah, to me, it's just like I can't I get to cozy up with my boys and my book and what a blessing life is.

• 11:06Connor Wood?

  Yeah. Yeah. But I've been consuming so much media and then last night I like before, obviously, like everything right now media wise is like really everything I should do, we should do a segment on here like what scared me the worst on Twitter yesterday.

• 11:25Connor Wood?

  Which like everything really truly, truly like heart sinking. I'm scared, which I never used to be like that.

• 11:33Brooke Averick?

  I think like it's really hard to tell like what is fear mongering him? What is like an actual news report?

• 11:42Connor Wood?

  Yeah, well, I just don't know anything.

• 11:46Brooke Averick?

  That makes it harder.

• 11:46Connor Wood?

  Known anything. So I don't get a lot of stuff.

• 11:51Brooke Averick?

  Sure.

• 11:51Connor Wood?

  I don't understand and I don't resonate with a lot of stuff. And I guess yesterday was the address. There's an address to the nation.

• 11:59Brooke Averick?

  Sure.

• 12:00Connor Wood?

  Like tonight, like there's three countries doing an address to the nation.

• 12:05Connor Wood?

  And it's kind of like, why are you like soft launching the address to the nation? Why are you soft launching the address to the nation? Like how Alex Cooper like teases her podcast, you know?

• 12:17Brooke Averick?

  Is that what's happening?

• 12:18Connor Wood?

  Yeah. Like, tell us what you're doing tomorrow, you know, like,

• 12:24Connor Wood?

  should we go to work today? You know, like, is there a point? You know what I mean? Like, should someone quit their job today instead of like, go, go, you know?

• 12:31Brooke Averick?

  What are you thinking they're gonna say?

• 12:32Connor Wood?

  Lockdown?

• 12:33Brooke Averick?

  No, no.

• 12:34Connor Wood?

  Yeah. And I, and I think it's gonna be lockdown for energy. I think it's gonna be like.

• 12:42Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 12:43Connor Wood?

  Yeah. I think it's gonna be like an energy-saving lockdown because Australia just already did it today because we're in a different time zone.

• 12:51Brooke Averick?

  Like, keep your life off?

• 12:52Connor Wood?

  Just like, preserve energy, don't drive as much if you don't need to, don't get too much gas at the thing because they're not in the war but they want to keep their taxes low for like truckers, they call them truckies. And, um, so that's just, that was what scared me yesterday.

• 13:09Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 13:10Connor Wood?

  But I mean, that's not the worst thing that scared me yesterday because I did hear that there's an alien human breeding branch of the government now, which like that made me...

• 13:17Brooke Averick?

  There's always been.

• 13:19Connor Wood?

  Yeah, there's always been.

• 13:20Brooke Averick?

  That's what what's it called is.

• 13:22Connor Wood?

  What, Area 51?

• 13:23Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 13:25Connor Wood?

  Now, the thing about the alien-human hybrids, like if that is a real thing, like, I'm gonna be upset if they live longer and are taller than me, you know?

• 13:32Brooke Averick?

  They were, they did a season, remember that, like, it wasn't American Horror Story, but it was American Horror Stories? There was a season about Area, like, why do I keep forgetting the number, 51?

• 13:43Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 13:43Brooke Averick?

  There was a season about Area 51 and human-alien breeding.

• 13:47Connor Wood?

  I'm just so out of the loop.

• 13:49Brooke Averick?

  With human-alien breeding? I don't think that we're in...

• 13:52Connor Wood?

  Across the board.

• 13:52Brooke Averick?

  There's a loop to be in there for the general public.

• 13:56Connor Wood?

  I think there's a deeper dive that could be done, but...

• 13:58Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, but then it's like, you enter, you conspiracy theorist.

• 14:01Connor Wood?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 14:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 14:02Connor Wood?

  What isn't a conspiracy, what isn't now? Because now, and I'm gonna go into another conspiracy theory, I think tonight might be either the lockdown or we're launching to space again and we're going to the moon, which is the first time since we went to the moon the last time, and everyone's like, oh, my gosh, it's so dangerous, we're so worried, we hope they make it back safe. It's like, wait, didn't we do this before color TV was invented?

• 14:25Brooke Averick?

  It could also literally just be Trump is renaming the Palm Beach Airport.

• 14:29Connor Wood?

  Or he finished the ballroom.

• 14:30Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 14:31Connor Wood?

  Which would be huge news for us.

• 14:34Brooke Averick?

  We'll see.

• 14:38Connor Wood?

  Yeah, no, it's true. I like a lot of people are like, it's just gonna be him being like, we won.

• 14:42Brooke Averick?

  I'm sure.

• 14:44Connor Wood?

  Yeah. Anyways, that's my fear mongering essay of the day. Let me make sure there was no more fear mongering to be, to be done.

• 14:51Brooke Averick?

  That we should have a fear mongering segment that people can skip. Like from like 10 to 25, we're doing fear mongering. And then we're doing pop culture.

• 15:00Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 15:02Brooke Averick?

  Okay, guess who? Fear mongering.

• 15:04Connor Wood?

  No, no, no.

• 15:05Brooke Averick?

  Pop culture.

• 15:05Connor Wood?

  We're starting with homophobes? Homophobes, guess who? Fear mongering. TV I'm watching.

• 15:16Connor Wood?

  Milking Farm.

• 15:17Brooke Averick?

  TV.

• 15:18Connor Wood?

  Milking Farm. Moon Launch. The Kit Kat Heist in Europe.

• 15:25Brooke Averick?

  I saw that.

• 15:26Connor Wood?

  The, the draft.

• 15:29Connor Wood?

  More news on homophobes.

• 15:33Connor Wood?

  Here, here?

• 15:36Brooke Averick?

  I haven't planted my flags yet. I'm gonna do it during Pride Month.

• 15:41Connor Wood?

  You're gonna do how many flags? You just said plural?

• 15:44Brooke Averick?

  Well, I have 50. Well, now I have 49, cause once a year, and if y'all are coming to our shows, I'm gonna be giving out some pride flags.

• 15:52Connor Wood?

  Cool.

• 15:53Brooke Averick?

  Um, but yeah, I don't know how many I'll plant. But now, now I'm starting to get scared of this person, the neighbor. Because now I've noticed she's parked her car in a way that's like blocking me and, and my gay neighbors. And I think she's trying to get us to hit it. Because she has cameras lined up everywhere outside of her car. So I think she's, she's got something up her sleeve.

• 16:18Connor Wood?

  You don't have like a higher-

• 16:19Brooke Averick?

  Upper homophobic sleeves.

• 16:21Connor Wood?

  You don't have like a higher power that you could reach out to, right?

• 16:24Brooke Averick?

  I have my landlord who's like on it.

• 16:28Connor Wood?

  Could you be like, my neighbor's trying to get me to hit her car?

• 16:32Brooke Averick?

  Like, I don't have the concrete proof. It's just a theory based off of the way she's, it's like just, like our two driveways, it's so hard to explain, like are separated by a massive drop off that I've dropped down off of quite a few times and then had to press all of my weight on the gas to reverse back up. Does that make sense? There's just like a drop off.

• 16:55Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 16:56Brooke Averick?

  That if I dropped off, I'd be in her driveway. Um, but she's parked now like right up against the drop off so that I couldn't drop off, which is like ideally I would never drop off, but like sometimes I need to drop off to wiggle my way out of the driveway. So it's hard to explain, like she's technically within her limits, but she's pushing, she's testing me.

• 17:18Connor Wood?

  I see.

• 17:18Brooke Averick?

  She's testing me. Like I have to do it like an extra 55 point turn to maneuver because like the front of my car usually enters into that space without me fully dropping off, but now it can't.

• 17:30Connor Wood?

  I like how you're like, she's blocking us in and you're like fully able to get in and out of your driveway.

• 17:34Brooke Averick?

  It's harder. It's harder. You've seen my driveway. It's, it's really hard to maneuver and she's making it extra difficult.

• 17:42Connor Wood?

  What do you say? What can you say?

• 17:44Brooke Averick?

  Nothing. I want to, no.

• 17:47Connor Wood?

  What do you want to?

• 17:48Brooke Averick?

  Put a pride flag on her car, but she has cameras all around it.

• 17:53Connor Wood?

  You write a note on the pride flag?

• 17:55Brooke Averick?

  Happy pride.

• 17:57Connor Wood?

  Move your car or else?

• 18:00Brooke Averick?

  And also the way she's parked, like it's very hard for her to get into that position. Like there's no reason for her to be parked the way that she is. What I like, you know, you have to be pretty unhappy to be parking like that.

• 18:16Connor Wood?

  Yeah, for sure.

• 18:17Brooke Averick?

  That's what I'll say.

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• 19:51Connor Wood?

  Well, bless your heart. I'm here for so long and I'm worried because I think when I get back, I have to move.

• 19:57Brooke Averick?

  Why?

• 19:58Connor Wood?

  Because that's like how long I'm gonna be here for the stretch of time.

• 20:01Brooke Averick?

  My hair fell out of my clip. Does it look weird?

• 20:03Connor Wood?

  Hmm, I can't see the back of your head.

• 20:05Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 20:09Brooke Averick?

  Is there a day you have to be out? What day do you have?

• 20:13Connor Wood?

  I don't know.

• 20:14Brooke Averick?

  That?

• 20:15Connor Wood?

  At this point, I'm too scared to ask.

• 20:16Brooke Averick?

  No, you need to ask. Are you month-to-month now?

• 20:19Connor Wood?

  No, they wouldn't do, they wouldn't, they wouldn't do that.

• 20:21Brooke Averick?

  So you need to find out the last day that you can be in your apartment.

• 20:24Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that's a good place to start.

• 20:25Brooke Averick?

  My guess is the end of April?

• 20:28Connor Wood?

  It's definitely May, like the beginning of May.

• 20:31Brooke Averick?

  Okay. So you'll be back in time?

• 20:34Connor Wood?

  Yeah, it's not April yet, right?

• 20:36Brooke Averick?

  It's April 1st.

• 20:36Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh, it's April 1st.

• 20:37Brooke Averick?

  Oh my God, we didn't do any April Fools.

• 20:42Brooke Averick?

  I don't fuck with April Fools.

• 20:43Connor Wood?

  To be honest, like, there should be years where you skip it.

• 20:48Brooke Averick?

  Like, it should be a leap year thing?

• 20:49Connor Wood?

  Yeah, cuz like,

• 20:52Connor Wood?

  maybe I need to get on meds cuz it's like, I wouldn't, I'm not like, cool with people doing jokes right now.

• 20:58Brooke Averick?

  No, I don't like, I don't, I, I rarely like pranks.

• 21:04Connor Wood?

  And like-

• 21:04Brooke Averick?

  I especially don't like if they're directed toward me.

• 21:06Connor Wood?

  And especially right now if a brand is like, "Let's do like, this insane thing," it's like, you're in my, I'm not buying a product from you for a little bit. I'm not, we're not, none of us are in the mood for an April Fools. You're clogging up my airspace.

• 21:18Brooke Averick?

  I haven't gotten, I haven't really opened my phone this morning in an amazing way. So I haven't gotten pranked yet.

• 21:25Connor Wood?

  Oh, my gosh. You probably don't have that day. I guess my old job was so bad, like, I'm, I've told, I've said this before on here, but like, my old jobs were scary cuz they were all startups and so like, I would just have to like, not ever turn my phone on, do not disturb. And so like, my vibration of my phone getting a text like wakes me up in a way that like, if someone broke into the, my bedroom, like, that's, it feels the same.

• 21:47Brooke Averick?

  I feel like I literally this year just got out of the, if my dad texts me, I'm, I'm in trouble

• 21:55Brooke Averick?

  phase of my life. Like, I always used to think if I got a text from my dad, I was in trouble.

• 21:59Connor Wood?

  I just always think someone died. I would love to be in trouble.

• 22:03Brooke Averick?

  Oh, no, I have, I like, a, a fear of getting in trouble.

• 22:08Connor Wood?

  By your papa?

• 22:10Brooke Averick?

  I just feel like he would mostly, like, he, he would always, like, in high school, like, if I left, like, something out on the counter, just send a picture of it with no text. And so I think I've always am expecting, like, to get a picture of, like, the cereal that I left out or something, or the AC that I didn't turn down.

• 22:29Connor Wood?

  There's gonna be an age that your father gets where he's gonna just send you a picture of cereal and it's gonna re-trigger this whole thing, but he's just gonna be like, "I'm just eating the cereal today."

• 22:37Brooke Averick?

  Maybe. Oh, I have something I wanna say, but I can't.

• 22:42Connor Wood?

  I have something I wanna say, but I can't.

• 22:45Connor Wood?

  Um, oh, I'll talk, I could talk about the fact that I have a huge black eye.

• 22:49Brooke Averick?

  Oh, yeah.

• 22:51Connor Wood?

  Oh, yeah. Um, I hit my face on a ladder, which like, it's so funny that that's, like, we've kind of manifested that. I'm always talking about ladders on here.

• 23:00Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 23:01Connor Wood?

  And how that's my favorite icebreaker.

• 23:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 23:04Connor Wood?

  Aw, I kind of love that for me. I wish it didn't happen where like I have other, like, I wish I just would have gotten the black eye.

• 23:11Brooke Averick?

  Right. I get that. I'm so intrigued, by the way, that you scab, because you didn't, you were saying you weren't bleeding.

• 23:17Connor Wood?

  No, I just, I get like a strawberry and it scabs in a way where it's like I have a big, open wound, but like-

• 23:22Brooke Averick?

  It doesn't make any sense to me.

• 23:23Connor Wood?

  There was hours for the day where like it wasn't even notice, not even noticeably bleeding, and then it just scabs.

• 23:28Brooke Averick?

  I don't get how you can have a scab without any sort of open skin. Ooh, I didn't like open skin.

• 23:37Connor Wood?

  Well, then you know what? You're not gonna like that new show. Something very bad is gonna happen.

• 23:42Brooke Averick?

  Oh, I want to see that. Is it too gory for me?

• 23:44Connor Wood?

  Yeah. I also started watching it last night and I had the, like, the weirdest string of evil dreams. Like, not even like scary, just like weird as hell.

• 23:56Brooke Averick?

  Who's in that show?

• 23:58Connor Wood?

  Camilla Monroe and Adam DiMarco.

• 24:01Brooke Averick?

  Oh, my god. She is the most beautiful person that I have ever seen in my life.

• 24:07Connor Wood?

  I've just learned like how to properly use camp in a way like-

• 24:12Brooke Averick?

  I'm still working on that.

• 24:13Connor Wood?

  Everything's a little bit over the top theatrical in this show. Like, it's a little bit, you start watching it and it's like, okay, if the first thing, I'm just gonna give you the premise, because I've only watched one episode. She's basically getting married to Adam, and he's part of this rich family. Everyone's bizarre. I'm talking about one small inconvenience on an eight-hour road trip going to get, like, we're calling it off, you know? Like, I'm not someone who has something bizarre happen to me where I'm like deeply unsettled, and you just keep going with the trip, you know, like, and then two?

• 24:53Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 24:53Connor Wood?

  And this is like a thing where like there's a string of things and it's like, she always has this gut feeling and then there's thing after thing, and it's like bizarre things.

• 25:02Brooke Averick?

  That sounds good.

• 25:04Connor Wood?

  Yeah, and it's like, then the family's weird and they're really kind of just like bizarre and mean to her and like,

• 25:11Connor Wood?

  in a crazy way.

• 25:14Connor Wood?

  It's just like, no, we're calling it off.

• 25:15Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 25:15Connor Wood?

  I guess that's the point of the show, that you're just like, on edge, on edge. And there's a lot of like, you know, I'm laying in my hotel bed and there's jumps.

• 25:22Brooke Averick?

  I'm excited.

• 25:24Connor Wood?

  Yeah, it's, it's good. Like, I mean, I don't know, I'm not like a horror movie watcher and there is like a lot of bleeding.

• 25:29Brooke Averick?

  Okay, that I don't know. Like, do you see actively like them, like slicing?

• 25:35Connor Wood?

  No, just like a woman running into a mirror and then like, a nosebleed.

• 25:40Brooke Averick?

  Okay, those are fine for me. Like, what I can't watch is like stabbing. Or like, I can't watch doctor shows because of like surgery.

• 25:49Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I hate when I see like skin be sliced up like cleanly.

• 25:51Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, I can't do that. I can't do that. But like, if you're already bleeding, like I can look at a bloody body. Does that make sense? I just can't watch it happen if I'm seeing active piercing.

• 26:02Connor Wood?

  You don't want to see how the sausage is made.

• 26:03Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, so, like, I couldn't watch someone be put into a meat grinder, but I could see the meat.

• 26:09Connor Wood?

  I don't think I could see that, watch that either.

• 26:10Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 26:12Connor Wood?

  I'm sure there's someone out there that could. Watch someone be put into a meat grinder.

• 26:16Brooke Averick?

  Oh, absolutely. There are so many people who don't have a problem with that.

• 26:19Connor Wood?

  I couldn't eat, I couldn't eat meat for like a full-blown week after watching the Jeffrey Dahmer thing.

• 26:28Brooke Averick?

  That, no, that was hard.

• 26:31Connor Wood?

  There was a truck.

• 26:32Brooke Averick?

  I just got chills in my body.

• 26:33Connor Wood?

  Where, I don't remember, I, I think I lived here when we watched that and there was a truck that was always in my neighborhood because there's a restaurant and it had this like huge slab of raw meat on it and I was like, move that truck.

• 26:46Brooke Averick?

  Move that bus, yeah.

• 26:48Connor Wood?

  No, it's just like, it looked like human.

• 26:51Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 26:51Connor Wood?

  Meat on it.

• 26:54Connor Wood?

  Um, and then I'll just keep going with TV because I feel like weirdly brain dead and all I've been doing is consuming media.

• 26:59Brooke Averick?

  Connor, I told you like I've been proud of myself for how much TV I've been watching because that means my attention span is growing.

• 27:06Connor Wood?

  Mine's getting small. I feel like I'm getting dumber. Oh my gosh, I'm getting dumber. I need to finish the book I've been reading for six months.

• 27:12Brooke Averick?

  What book?

• 27:13Connor Wood?

  Stoner.

• 27:14Brooke Averick?

  Oh, I love the cover of that one.

• 27:16Connor Wood?

  Do you?

• 27:17Brooke Averick?

  Is it the one that kind of looks like a classic?

• 27:19Connor Wood?

  It's very, it's very like unsettling.

• 27:23Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. Wait, but it, when did that come out? Like, it's not a classic, right?

• 27:28Connor Wood?

  No.

• 27:28Brooke Averick?

  I love, yeah, I love that cover. What's it about? Oh, it it it's old. Never mind.

• 27:36Connor Wood?

  1965, yeah.

• 27:37Brooke Averick?

  It is old. Okay, never mind. I thought it was like a modern book that like took on an old timey cover. So I liked that, but now I don't care for it. What's it about? Do you know?

• 27:49Connor Wood?

  So that guy on the front and he's just like,

• 27:53Connor Wood?

  he would like it. He's just like so in love with like, reading and writing, like literature.

• 27:59Brooke Averick?

  Why are you reading this?

• 28:00Connor Wood?

  Like takes over his life.

• 28:03Brooke Averick?

  Why do you do this?

• 28:06Brooke Averick?

  You know what? There's this series that boys are reading. It's like a boy book. And it's called Dungeon Crawler Carl. Dylan was telling me about it and like a few friends have looked at it.

• 28:19Connor Wood?

  Literally just told me I need to watch like Bob the Builder book.

• 28:21Brooke Averick?

  No, this is literally Captain Underpants for grown up.

• 28:24Connor Wood?

  Carl's doomsday scenario like.

• 28:26Brooke Averick?

  People, no, boys are loving it. It's for grown up. It's men technically.

• 28:31Connor Wood?

  Grown up boys.

• 28:31Brooke Averick?

  Dylan is reading it.

• 28:32Connor Wood?

  I'm not watching. I'm not reading Dungeon Crawler.

• 28:35Brooke Averick?

  Dylan is reading it.

• 28:36Connor Wood?

  No, this looks.

• 28:37Brooke Averick?

  It's good, apparently. Like my friend, like Thompson is reading it, like grown up boys.

• 28:43Connor Wood?

  I'm not reading something called Dungeon Crawler Carl.

• 28:47Brooke Averick?

  Stoner. Why are you reading about a man who whose love for literature? Is overwhelming. Like that is not for you. Dungeon Crawler Carl is for you. The Butcher's Masquerade is for you.

• 28:59Connor Wood?

  I am not reading The Butcher's Masquerade.

• 29:04Brooke Averick?

  I think that you should.

• 29:06Connor Wood?

  What in the, no, I'm not doomsday Carl.

• 29:10Brooke Averick?

  I, I'm, these are all over Barnes and Noble. Like this is what boys are reading. Like if you read the, like if you were a young boy reading Captain Underpants and shit like that and you liked The Hunger Games, it's like Captain Underpants meets The Hunger Games. I don't even know what it's about, but I'm just guessing.

• 29:26Connor Wood?

  I wasn't, you know what? I, I never read Captain Underpants.

• 29:29Brooke Averick?

  You think you're better than Captain Underpants?

• 29:32Connor Wood?

  I probably did think that. Yeah. I probably said, you guys are here.

• 29:35Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 29:36Connor Wood?

  I was in gifted and talented classes.

• 29:38Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 29:39Connor Wood?

  I moved forward with AP.

• 29:42Connor Wood?

  What was AP? Advanced Placement.

• 29:45Brooke Averick?

  Oh, wait. Look at my book.

• 29:48Brooke Averick?

  I brought my book today. Look how thick this is.

• 29:53Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that's not gonna work.

• 29:54Brooke Averick?

  Do you see that?

• 29:55Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 29:57Brooke Averick?

  I'm loving these Crescent City books, you guys. It's 805 pages.

• 30:02Connor Wood?

  That's not, yeah, that's, can't.

• 30:04Brooke Averick?

  But wow. Just wow.

• 30:06Connor Wood?

  Let me think what I was reading when everyone else was reading Captain Underpants. What grade was that?

• 30:10Brooke Averick?

  Um, young. There was Goosebumps.

• 30:13Connor Wood?

  So when people, I'd never, I-

• 30:14Brooke Averick?

  Magic Tree House.

• 30:15Connor Wood?

  I was reading Magic Tree House.

• 30:17Brooke Averick?

  Gregor the Overlander was my favorite.

• 30:18Connor Wood?

  And Boxcar Children.

• 30:19Brooke Averick?

  Then there was Warriors.

• 30:21Connor Wood?

  So, none of those?

• 30:23Brooke Averick?

  You're in Boxcar?

• 30:24Connor Wood?

  Boxcar and House, uh-

• 30:25Brooke Averick?

  I didn't like Boxcar.

• 30:27Connor Wood?

  My mom liked Boxcar for some reason, so-

• 30:29Brooke Averick?

  I feel like it's very wholesome.

• 30:30Connor Wood?

  Yeah. And it was like, I loved like Goonies vibes, you know, like, these kids are like, well, I think that they were like orphans.

• 30:38Brooke Averick?

  There was also this one, not Tale of Despro. Do you know Tale of Despro? That was about a mouse? Then there was these other ones about a mouse named Geronimo, I think. Do you know?

• 30:48Connor Wood?

  I knew Geronimo.

• 30:49Brooke Averick?

  Is he, would you mind looking up Geronimo? Chapter books for kids, mouse?

• 30:57Brooke Averick?

  I loved this guy.

• 31:00Brooke Averick?

  No, maybe his name wasn't Geronimo.

• 31:01Connor Wood?

  Carl the Dung-

• 31:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no. Geronimo Silton. Loved, loved his ass. Yeah, I loved him. Um,

• 31:14Brooke Averick?

  what else was around that time? I think we got, we got most of them. But I lo-, oh my god, I mean, what I would give. That's what I'm gonna do. Sorry, I didn't say my sentence out loud.

• 31:28Connor Wood?

  Didn't get there.

• 31:29Brooke Averick?

  We need, I guess we kind of have them, but we need like a mainstream scholastic book fair for adults.

• 31:36Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 31:38Connor Wood?

  That would be nice. That would be nice for people.

• 31:41Brooke Averick?

  It would be just so awesome.

• 31:45Connor Wood?

  So what's like-

• 31:46Brooke Averick?

  But like, I'm wondering like-

• 31:49Connor Wood?

  What are you wondering? And I'm gonna, I'm gonna raise my concern too.

• 31:52Brooke Averick?

  I was gonna say, I guess I'm wondering like, what is the difference between a bookstore and a scholastic event for adults?

• 31:59Connor Wood?

  There's none?

• 32:01Brooke Averick?

  No, there is. I want authors to come in. I want like Coachella for books. I guess there's BookCon, but like, I don't really understand what that is.

• 32:11Connor Wood?

  I, yeah, well, cause like, it was fun for us because we were getting out of class, you know, there was like novelty with that.

• 32:18Brooke Averick?

  So much more to it.

• 32:19Connor Wood?

  We couldn't drive to a bookstore in elementary school. That was our, that was our like, big event.

• 32:24Brooke Averick?

  But it was like, the scholastic employees would come in. I don't know if you had this. They would come in a few days before the book fair.

• 32:30Connor Wood?

  My dad didn't-

• 32:31Brooke Averick?

  And you had a booklet in front of you with all the new books. It was like a little scholastic magazine. And they would go through and they would explain the synopsis of each book. And you could like, take notes on if you liked them or not. Oh my god.

• 32:43Connor Wood?

  Thank you, rich dad. That must have been a really nice school.

• 32:45Brooke Averick?

  Hi, thank you, rich dad. I actually didn't get any money for the book fair. I had to call my mom and pop up and ask for a credit card number.

• 32:50Connor Wood?

  Thank you.

• 32:51Brooke Averick?

  I guess that's not helping my case.

• 32:53Connor Wood?

  Thank you.

• 32:53Brooke Averick?

  Hi, thank you, rich grandparents. No. But everyone had cash and I didn't get cash. I had to call, I had to get my credit card number over the phone. So.

• 33:01Connor Wood?

  Oh, I hate that.

• 33:03Brooke Averick?

  I know, I know. It was so sad.

• 33:04Connor Wood?

  I mean, I just wanna, I'm just thinking of like, if you made it adult vibes, which I guess what you're yearning for is pretty much the same energy. I like, don't know what the adult version of like, those animal shaped erasers would be to put on my wooden pencil.

• 33:20Brooke Averick?

  I mean, I mean, adults love, I love cool bookmarks.

• 33:23Connor Wood?

  I love erasers.

• 33:25Brooke Averick?

  Any, any bookish merch, like post-it notes, like annotation notes, bookmarks, as I already said, highlighters. Just, I love all that stuff.

• 33:38Connor Wood?

  You know, I said I have like no memory.

• 33:40Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 33:41Connor Wood?

  I do remember specifically like this, the music that was playing and I remember what the bathrooms were like in my elementary school and like, I remember kind of the route of my elementary school, which is weird. Does it?

• 33:53Brooke Averick?

  Yes.

• 33:55Connor Wood?

  It was just so long ago.

• 33:56Brooke Averick?

  Did you ever have this blue hand sanitizer that was kind of foamy?

• 34:01Connor Wood?

  I don't know.

• 34:02Brooke Averick?

  Okay, yeah. We had this blue sanitizer, hand sanitizer that was kind of foamy. And if I smelled that right now, I think I would actually teleport.

• 34:11Connor Wood?

  Like a death.

• 34:12Brooke Averick?

  I think I would actually tell, yeah. Exactly.

• 34:16Connor Wood?

  Um, I have this one memory, awesome memory. I think I told it before, just like, one of our teachers' cars exploded in the parking lot and we got to Allspins like the entire half the day, just like watching it burn.

• 34:27Brooke Averick?

  That's, that is awesome.

• 34:28Connor Wood?

  And then at some point, all the tires popped from the heat and it went up in the air for a second. She started crying, but like, I remember everyone else was like, what? Like fireworks show, you know?

• 34:39Brooke Averick?

  I literally like, I loved elementary school. So much. Like I was one of those kids that's like, if I had to miss school, it was like I was beside myself. But I also like, my school was really like camp.

• 34:54Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 34:55Brooke Averick?

  It was such an amazing place. I wish everyone, middle school, not so much. High school, not so much.

• 35:00Connor Wood?

  There's like a very like evil couple of years for me too, that I just like, oh, kids just suck.

• 35:07Brooke Averick?

  I, my ninth and 10th was evil.

• 35:11Connor Wood?

  Kids just suck. I worry about kids.

• 35:13Brooke Averick?

  I know. I can't imagine it's any better now.

• 35:15Connor Wood?

  And they're mean and now they have phones.

• 35:17Brooke Averick?

  I know, it must be far worse.

• 35:18Connor Wood?

  Oh, Jesus H. Like, I can't imagine. Thank you, teachers. Thank you, thank you, thank you to kids. I don't think any kids listen to this, but, oh my gosh. You just have to, unfortunately, you just have to like, keep going.

• 35:33Brooke Averick?

  One time, you remember Form Spring, of course.

• 35:36Connor Wood?

  I don't know. Oh. Form Spring.

• 35:39Brooke Averick?

  The anonymous, like you could post anonymously on someone.

• 35:41Connor Wood?

  Ask FM.

• 35:42Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, but it was Form Spring before Ask FM, I think. But there was this, um, when I was a freshman, there was this senior girl who I thought was just like the coolest, prettiest girl in the world and I wanted to be her friend so badly. And we like were developing a kind of friendship. Did you hear my stomach growl to sin?

• 36:00Connor Wood?

  I thought it was mine.

• 36:00Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 36:01Connor Wood?

  Wow.

• 36:01Brooke Averick?

  And then I wrote on her form string, "Who's your favorite freshman?" And I forgot to make it anonymous. It was just me that said that.

• 36:12Brooke Averick?

  That was really hard.

• 36:13Connor Wood?

  What did she answer? Someone else?

• 36:15Brooke Averick?

  She said, "You!" exclamation.

• 36:16Connor Wood?

  Oh.

• 36:19Brooke Averick?

  Which was awesome.

• 36:20Connor Wood?

  Her twos were tied.

• 36:21Brooke Averick?

  But like, I didn't want, that's not what I wanted.

• 36:24Brooke Averick?

  That wasn't how I wanted that to go.

• 36:25Connor Wood?

  Oh, little Brock, that's humiliating.

• 36:28Brooke Averick?

  Connor, try and lift me up instead of putting me back down.

• 36:32Connor Wood?

  No, I mean, like, you're past it, too. You're acknowledging that it's, I'm not putting you back down. I'm happy that is embarrassing. But that's like a pin 15 type situation, like, that's like a canon developmental situation that happens. You're like, okay, now we keep going. Perfect example of keeping going.

• 36:51Brooke Averick?

  It was hard to keep going. But, yeah.

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• 37:49Speaker 05

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• 37:55Speaker 06

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• 38:22Speaker 07

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• 38:26Brooke Averick?

  Anyway, I guess this ties into something else that I wanted to talk about, was Classic Book Fair.

• 38:32Brooke Averick?

  I'm gonna open... I've been missing Tiny Bookshop recently.

• 38:36Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 38:37Brooke Averick?

  And it sucks because I can't really play it again because I know how it ends. I noticed you just took your phone out, wasn't it?

• 38:43Connor Wood?

  I was just checking my notes.

• 38:44Brooke Averick?

  Okay. I am gonna run my own bookstore out of Beach Town. Like, that's something that I'm gonna do.

• 38:52Connor Wood?

  Great goal.

• 38:53Brooke Averick?

  And, but I'm starting to, like, as I come up on 30 soon, it's like, let's, let's start to really think about doing that.

• 39:00Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 39:01Brooke Averick?

  And Kat's gonna do it with me, and we're also gonna make it a cat rescue. So, like, we're gonna foster cats in the bookstore. And, like, people who shop, like, can adopt them. So, kind of cat cafe x bookstore. And there will be a catio attached for our cats as well. And we're gonna have this Beach Town, and, like, our, some of our other friends are also gonna, uh, start their establishments there, so it'll be like a compound. So, I think, like, Tristan and Miles are gonna do, like, bar x, like, music.

• 39:33Connor Wood?

  Fun.

• 39:34Brooke Averick?

  Record store. And Sodi's gonna be in charge of, like, the gift shop and, like, crap that's, like, at the bookstore. What will you do? And by the way, we're thinking Carmel by the Sea right now, if that works.

• 39:45Connor Wood?

  That's really lovely. I, I really want you to watch Portlandia a little bit.

• 39:49Brooke Averick?

  You want, do you want me to do Oregon?

• 39:52Connor Wood?

  No, it's just like, it feels like exactly... It feels like show up this alley of this, this one skit they do.

• 39:59Brooke Averick?

  Oh, okay. Well, basically I'm in the market for a beach town.

• 40:01Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:02Brooke Averick?

  That's willing to kind of rent their whole city to me.

• 40:04Connor Wood?

  Cornwall, but he would be perfect because it's so tiny.

• 40:06Brooke Averick?

  It's so tiny and looks like it's right out of Shrek. But I've never been, but I kind of want to go to the East Coast.

• 40:14Connor Wood?

  I just feel like you wouldn't have like as much of a vibe there. Like you could do like a Rhode Island type situation.

• 40:19Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 40:20Connor Wood?

  Newport.

• 40:21Brooke Averick?

  Yes. Like a, yes, but then it's like, then you have off seasons, which is hard.

• 40:26Connor Wood?

  That's what I was thinking, but you might like an off season.

• 40:28Brooke Averick?

  I might.

• 40:29Connor Wood?

  When else would you go to like Europe?

• 40:31Brooke Averick?

  True that.

• 40:32Connor Wood?

  True that.

• 40:33Brooke Averick?

  But anyway, what, what do you want to do in the town?

• 40:36Connor Wood?

  Um, what would I want to do in the town? See, like I have always wanted the coffee shop.

• 40:43Brooke Averick?

  You can do the coffee shop.

• 40:44Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 40:44Brooke Averick?

  I think, I forgot who you think someone else is doing the coffee shop that you might have a co-owner.

• 40:49Connor Wood?

  Hmm. That would be lovely because I don't want to be fully in charge of something.

• 40:53Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I forgot who's working that with you, but someone.

• 40:56Connor Wood?

  I had, oh my God, you just reminded me. I had the best idea of the weekend.

• 41:00Brooke Averick?

  What?

• 41:01Connor Wood?

  So I'm sitting at a restaurant and I'm looking at this other table and I'm like, God, they're having so much fun. It's hard for me not to be like.

• 41:16Brooke Averick?

  What restaurant were you at?

• 41:17Connor Wood?

  This place in New York Cafe Clooney and we've been there.

• 41:22Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 41:22Connor Wood?

  We went there together.

• 41:22Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 41:23Connor Wood?

  And I'm sitting, we lucked out and we got an outdoor table, which like by the grace of God, because I didn't even have a reservation and it was like, because it was like a Thursday night. It was, it's just now getting very nice out. Everyone's putting the tables back inside. And I'm sitting outside and I'm looking like from the outside looking in at this table, co-ed table. They're laughing. I can't hear how alarmed, alarmed they're laughing, but I can tell that it's like with their chest.

• 41:45Brooke Averick?

  What was the age demographic?

• 41:46Connor Wood?

  Hmm. Mid twenties. It's just like, you know, that's your prime and I'm just like.

• 41:51Brooke Averick?

  Don't say that.

• 41:52Connor Wood?

  It's part of your life and I like.

• 41:56Connor Wood?

  I'm like, oh, what are they talking about? You know what would be amazing?

• 41:59Brooke Averick?

  What?

• 42:00Connor Wood?

  A silent disco. You put the headphones in and you look around at different tables having conversations. And everyone signs a waiver coming in. You can tap into different tables conversations and listen in.

• 42:14Brooke Averick?

  I don't think anyone would like consent to that.

• 42:16Connor Wood?

  If you're willing and able and like you want to go in and tap into other people's conversations and like, listen in and it wouldn't be a spy thing, you're signing a waiver going in. But the like, the listen in cafe.

• 42:29Brooke Averick?

  The biggest ick I've ever gotten from a guy was during a silent disco when my headphones were off.

• 42:35Connor Wood?

  Ooh, why'd you do that?

• 42:36Brooke Averick?

  And he was dancing. I think I had an itch on my ear or something. But like, I just had to take my headphones off for a second.

• 42:42Connor Wood?

  You can't take yourself out of this.

• 42:43Brooke Averick?

  No, it was really hard. But like, if anyone needs the ick, just like, try to put yourself in a position where your headphones are off at a silent disco and his are on. And he's dancing to the beat that does not exist to you.

• 42:55Connor Wood?

  Yeah, that sucks. That's the most fun I've ever had was at ECL and we went to the silent disco and we accidentally, we were gonna stop there on the way to the Killers, which was my one and only chance to ever see the Killers. Not that I like, really need to, I guess, like, I'm not massive. You know, the Strokes, different story, the Killers, not so much. And we stopped at the silent disco and I was with like some of my best friends. And we danced and we danced and I had never laughed harder and that's like one of my most special memories is the silent disco.

• 43:26Brooke Averick?

  That's sweet.

• 43:27Connor Wood?

  Yeah, it was very fun.

• 43:29Brooke Averick?

  I really want to go to the Renaissance Fair, that reminded me.

• 43:32Connor Wood?

  Yeah, me too. I would, we need to, we should go.

• 43:35Brooke Averick?

  I know. I want to wear a corset that's comfortable, though.

• 43:41Connor Wood?

  I want to, I want to eat a turkey leg, which I just learned is fully ham.

• 43:45Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 43:46Connor Wood?

  Turkey legs?

• 43:47Brooke Averick?

  We've had this discussion before about turkey legs.

• 43:49Connor Wood?

  It's not turkey, it's ham.

• 43:51Brooke Averick?

  It's a turkey leg.

• 43:53Connor Wood?

  What kind of massive, massive turkey has a leg that way?

• 43:57Brooke Averick?

  Turkey legs are not ham. They are 100% poultry.

• 44:00Connor Wood?

  Turkey legs are not ham, I know that, but at the Renaissance Fair, they are.

• 44:04Brooke Averick?

  No, they're not.

• 44:06Connor Wood?

  A fair turkey leg is a massive smoked turkey drumstick? Likely from a male to turkey priced for its tender, juicy, raw, and savory, ham-like flavor?

• 44:18Brooke Averick?

  I mean, there might be a ham-like flavor to it, you're talking about the smokiness?

• 44:23Connor Wood?

  Maybe I was talking about the juicy.

• 44:24Brooke Averick?

  Like where do you confidently, like where do you get the information that makes you 100% sure that a turkey leg at the Renaissance Fair is ham?

• 44:33Connor Wood?

  Me, I guess being a man, I guess, like that's one of my death, that's one of my downfalls. But I really didn't, I don't consider turkeys juicy.

• 44:44Brooke Averick?

  Dark meat can be juicy.

• 44:47Connor Wood?

  But is it dark meat? I thought it was like pink.

• 44:52Brooke Averick?

  That's dark, dark meat is just like certain parts of the body.

• 44:55Connor Wood?

  No, I know what dark meat is.

• 44:59Connor Wood?

  I thought it was ham, y'all. That's ham.

• 45:04Brooke Averick?

  No, it's a turkey leg. It is pink. Yeah. Multiple things can be pink.

• 45:11Connor Wood?

  I see that.

• 45:12Brooke Averick?

  I love the way your brain worked. It's pink, so it must be ham.

• 45:15Connor Wood?

  Ham, pink, turkey, white.

• 45:16Brooke Averick?

  This turkey leg is pink, must be ham.

• 45:19Connor Wood?

  Oh my God, I've been telling everybody, Hamgate.

• 45:22Brooke Averick?

  I think you've said it on this podcast before.

• 45:24Connor Wood?

  I haven't. No one corrected me.

• 45:26Brooke Averick?

  I'm sure I must have tried.

• 45:29Connor Wood?

  Hmm. Okay. Well, cool. I'm cool with that.

• 45:31Brooke Averick?

  Nice.

• 45:33Connor Wood?

  The thing is like, be open to learning new things and not being so dead set.

• 45:38Brooke Averick?

  You are, yeah.

• 45:38Connor Wood?

  Convicted in something that you know nothing about.

• 45:42Brooke Averick?

  True.

• 45:43Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 45:44Brooke Averick?

  I have exciting news, but it will mean nothing to you.

• 45:48Brooke Averick?

  And everyone already knows there's no point in me really saying it.

• 45:50Connor Wood?

  Send me to me.

• 45:51Brooke Averick?

  But I'm just really excited because John Green is coming out with a novel. For the first time in 10 years.

• 45:58Connor Wood?

  I saw it on Instagram.

• 45:59Brooke Averick?

  Or something. And it's his first ever adult novel.

• 46:02Connor Wood?

  Like smut?

• 46:03Brooke Averick?

  No, just like not young adult. So like The Fault in Our Stars was young adult. Like it's about teenagers.

• 46:08Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 46:08Brooke Averick?

  And I read it when I was a teen. And so this one is for and about adults.

• 46:12Connor Wood?

  That's cool. Cause his fans are like growing up and they're adults now.

• 46:15Brooke Averick?

  Exactly. Yeah. And it was like, he was like, I don't know if I'll ever write a novel again. So it's really exciting that he's writing one, that he has written one and it's coming out in September.

• 46:25Connor Wood?

  I do feel like that's an age you don't stop scratching, you know?

• 46:28Brooke Averick?

  The novel age?

• 46:29Connor Wood?

  It's like psoriasis. No, I think like you would like, if you're really good at that and you keep creating bangers, like why would you, you know, like what would make you want to stop?

• 46:39Brooke Averick?

  I think he's really like gotten his head after The Fault in Our Stars. Like it's really hard to have something that is that successful and then have to keep writing after that.

• 46:50Brooke Averick?

  He wrote one novel after The Fault in Our Stars. And I think he's spoken a lot about how it's like, there's like a really big pressure.

• 46:58Brooke Averick?

  Of like, will it ever measure up?

• 47:02Connor Wood?

  That's that my, that's my favorite saying thing.

• 47:05Brooke Averick?

  What?

• 47:06Connor Wood?

  Everything that you create doesn't need to be the best ever. It's a stepping stone to your next thing. Lower the stakes.

• 47:11Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, but then it's hard when it's like you did make your best ever. And then like, probably nothing will ever be as good.

• 47:17Connor Wood?

  But you don't, like, you just never know that.

• 47:20Brooke Averick?

  You never know. You never know.

• 47:23Brooke Averick?

  Here's what I'll say about, about John Green. Fault in Our Stars. He did The Fault in Our Stars and then he did something called Turtles All the Way Down.

• 47:30Connor Wood?

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:31Brooke Averick?

  The Fault in Our Stars was my favorite, but Turtles All the Way Down like changed my life.

• 47:35Connor Wood?

  Turtles All the Way Down?

• 47:35Brooke Averick?

  Turtles All the Way Down changed my life.

• 47:37Connor Wood?

  What does that mean?

• 47:38Brooke Averick?

  It was about a character with OCD and that's how I written, learned that I had OCD.

• 47:42Connor Wood?

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:43Brooke Averick?

  So even though it wasn't my favorite, it still like changed my life. You know?

• 47:47Connor Wood?

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:47Brooke Averick?

  So that's cool.

• 47:50Brooke Averick?

  Anyway, I'm really excited.

• 47:52Connor Wood?

  That's gonna be great.

• 47:53Brooke Averick?

  Thanks.

• 47:54Connor Wood?

  Um, excited. I am excited.

• 47:56Brooke Averick?

  Maybe he'll do a press tour.

• 47:57Connor Wood?

  He might.

• 48:00Connor Wood?

  He might. Um, that's something I'm excited about.

• 48:05Brooke Averick?

  Tell me.

• 48:06Connor Wood?

  And this one like kinda hurts me. Like I, you, like, this is something that I feel like you about. You've, you will resonate with this part. Of me.

• 48:14Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 48:15Connor Wood?

  Is it like I've al- always been like a huge Fleetwood Mac fan?

• 48:18Brooke Averick?

  Oh, absolutely.

• 48:19Connor Wood?

  Huge Stevie Nicks fan. That's gonna be someone who.

• 48:24Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 48:24Connor Wood?

  Like, it's really gonna be. Any of th- th- those. I think it's my mom is like such a huge. Fan, you know, like I've been. Like. Ind- indicted into this like. Fanship and I've been like, it's. On my number one artist every year too, like, or not number one, but like in my top five. Um, Love Story Season Two by Ryan Murphy is gonna be about Fleetwood Mac.

• 48:49Brooke Averick?

  Are we, is that confirmed?

• 48:50Connor Wood?

  Yes.

• 48:50Brooke Averick?

  Is he shaking her head no?

• 48:52Connor Wood?

  Wait, it was posted yesterday.

• 48:55Speaker 08

  I just saw something on Twitter that said, because I was gonna put it in this, that said it was April Fools.

• 48:59Brooke Averick?

  Fools.

• 49:00Connor Wood?

  Oh! Damn!

• 49:02Brooke Averick?

  But-

• 49:03Connor Wood?

  Got my ass.

• 49:03Brooke Averick?

  Stevie has been in American Horror Story, so that's not like, out of left field that she would be tied to a Ryan Murphy project.

• 49:10Connor Wood?

  Yeah, no, but it was, um, Billy Lord and Connor Story hasn't been written.

• 49:16Brooke Averick?

  No, we're not Connor Story, if Connor Story was attached to a project-

• 49:20Connor Wood?

  So bizarrely weird to post something like that, like, maybe it will, m- maybe-

• 49:25Brooke Averick?

  You're pissed.

• 49:25Connor Wood?

  Well, yeah, I'm like a-

• 49:27Brooke Averick?

  You're pissed off.

• 49:28Connor Wood?

  Oh, like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna boycott!

• 49:29Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, yeah. You're mad, I see that.

• 49:32Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh! Like, it got, it got so much traction! Oh, I'm so disgusted! Because that is, that would be like, such a great love story! I mean, there's so much tied to it! And especially because of how much traction, like, like, with the-

• 49:48Brooke Averick?

  That is disgusting!

• 49:49Connor Wood?

  The, the like, leather and lace of it all.

• 49:54Brooke Averick?

  What is that?

• 49:54Connor Wood?

  Never get away from the sound of the one that loves you.

• 49:56Brooke Averick?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, no, you won't. Oh, no, that would be, Lindsey Buckingham and Stevie Nicks story would be-

• 50:01Connor Wood?

  Just-

• 50:02Brooke Averick?

  Beyond.

• 50:02Connor Wood?

  Wow.

• 50:03Brooke Averick?

  We'll see.

• 50:04Connor Wood?

  The AHS Zone on Twitter? You're on my list.

• 50:11Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 50:11Connor Wood?

  Stupid.

• 50:12Brooke Averick?

  I'm sorry, that is-

• 50:13Connor Wood?

  Dominic Sessa as John McVie, great casting. Actually, met him the other night.

• 50:18Brooke Averick?

  Did they have Connor Story as-

• 50:21Connor Wood?

  Lindsey Buckingham, thank you.

• 50:22Brooke Averick?

  Oh?

• 50:24Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 50:24Brooke Averick?

  Um?

• 50:25Connor Wood?

  Lucy Boynton as Christine McVie, I don't know-

• 50:28Brooke Averick?

  She was, yes you do, she was in Bohemian Rhapsody.

• 50:30Connor Wood?

  Who's Boynton?

• 50:31Brooke Averick?

  Um...

• 50:34Brooke Averick?

  Wow, did you see Connor Story's Verizon commercial? Really?

• 50:38Connor Wood?

  Well, we can watch it in bonus.

• 50:39Brooke Averick?

  They made like, a feature film of it. It's like, five minutes long and it's like, a horror film.

• 50:45Brooke Averick?

  It's, it was, it's insane, it's a completely new way of doing commercials.

• 50:49Connor Wood?

  Well, this new era of doing commercials, like, I saw something the other day, when, there was like, Super Bowl commercials coming out, and someone was like, Sabrina Carpenter teases her Samsung commercial, and it was like, the concept of Sabrina Carpenter teasing her commercial?

• 51:07Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 51:07Connor Wood?

  We're reaching a point of, like, consumerism, where we're teasing commercials?

• 51:13Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, well said, yeah.

• 51:15Connor Wood?

  Like, I'm having dreams of products in my brain.

• 51:17Brooke Averick?

  It just, it sucks, because like-

• 51:20Connor Wood?

  They're winning.

• 51:21Brooke Averick?

  That's horrible, but like on the other hand, if like Connor story was teasing his Verizon collab, I'd be like sitting at the Verizon store with faded red.

• 51:30Connor Wood?

  He's gonna fuck the flip phone.

• 51:33Brooke Averick?

  Wait till you see what happened. It was really good. I've watched it like three times.

• 51:38Connor Wood?

  Oh, I'm excited.

• 51:39Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, it's like a genuine.

• 51:40Connor Wood?

  But it's a horror movie. Let me try to like.

• 51:42Brooke Averick?

  It's a genuine horror movie.

• 51:44Connor Wood?

  Are there devices?

• 51:45Brooke Averick?

  Verizon.

• 51:46Connor Wood?

  Are there devices, president?

• 51:47Brooke Averick?

  Kinda, yeah, yeah.

• 51:50Connor Wood?

  Is a device the president?

• 51:53Connor Wood?

  I guess I'll just see. I really don't like have any creative bone to spare.

• 51:59Brooke Averick?

  It's a really good, you want me to tell you the concept?

• 52:01Connor Wood?

  Sure.

• 52:02Brooke Averick?

  He like, he's at this like really secluded kind of scary house and like things keep happening. Like the alarm goes off. Something else happened. I don't, shit keeps happening and then it turns out it's because his ass is so fat that he kept activating his, his phone in his back pocket.

• 52:20Connor Wood?

  Interesting.

• 52:21Brooke Averick?

  But it was scary.

• 52:23Connor Wood?

  That's really creative.

• 52:24Brooke Averick?

  It wasn't it?

• 52:25Connor Wood?

  To make, the, the concept of a Verizon.

• 52:27Brooke Averick?

  To tie in his piece.

• 52:28Connor Wood?

  The concept of a Verizon commercial to be centered around his, his huge ass.

• 52:34Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. Isn't that amazing? That's what I'm like, maybe we're going in a good direction, but then it's like six, something else comes out and it's sixteen steps back.

• 52:42Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I think that's fun.

• 52:44Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, it was really fun.

• 52:45Connor Wood?

  To me, that's fun.

• 52:46Brooke Averick?

  I enjoyed myself and I was like, ooh, this is scary. I really liked it.

• 52:51Connor Wood?

  Oh, yeah.

• 52:51Brooke Averick?

  And he felt really creatively fulfilled by the project.

• 52:54Connor Wood?

  Did he share that?

• 52:55Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 52:56Connor Wood?

  Oh, that's really great.

• 52:56Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, it really is.

• 52:58Connor Wood?

  Love when things come together in that way.

• 53:00Brooke Averick?

  I do too.

• 53:00Connor Wood?

  Oh, well, now I'm really upset.

• 53:02Brooke Averick?

  Why?

• 53:03Connor Wood?

  This is about the Fleetwood Mac thing?

• 53:04Brooke Averick?

  I know. I saw, I saw like the life go out of your eyes.

• 53:08Connor Wood?

  It's really hard for me to like get back into what we were talking about.

• 53:15Brooke Averick?

  Do you want me to give you a few options?

• 53:17Connor Wood?

  Well, I have one right here.

• 53:18Brooke Averick?

  Okay, talk to me. Talk to me.

• 53:20Connor Wood?

  Oh my gosh, unless this is an April Fool's joke too. Like, I don't know. Like, I could be... No, it is. Like, I'm... I just feel stupid as hell.

• 53:26Brooke Averick?

  What was it?

• 53:28Connor Wood?

  Like, there's no point in me sharing anything. Like, this... We should have skipped. Oh, everything... Everything I have in my notes today was fake.

• 53:34Brooke Averick?

  What? Tell us what they are.

• 53:37Connor Wood?

  The alien breeding program. Like, I don't think that's real. Okay, now I'm like... Okay. And did they actually steal 16 tons of Kit Kats in Europe? I'm assuming not.

• 53:47Brooke Averick?

  I... I believed the Kit Kats, because that was yesterday.

• 53:50Connor Wood?

  Is Instagram...

• 53:51Brooke Averick?

  It's not kosher to do April Fool's on March 31st.

• 53:54Connor Wood?

  Is Instagram launching a feature, paid feature, to stalk people's stories unseen?

• 54:00Brooke Averick?

  You can... You can already do that.

• 54:02Connor Wood?

  Paid?

• 54:03Brooke Averick?

  Unpaid, uh, anonymous something, anonymousviewer.com or something. I already do that all the time.

• 54:10Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, Kit Kat's real.

• 54:12Connor Wood?

  Oh.

• 54:14Speaker 08

  This is real, but like, not really.

• 54:17Connor Wood?

  Well, like, what, we believe Matt Gaetz?

• 54:20Brooke Averick?

  No, I don't think we do.

• 54:22Connor Wood?

  You think Trump could keep that a secret? We're breeding aliens.

• 54:28Connor Wood?

  They're the...

• 54:29Brooke Averick?

  It would be crazy if aliens, actually.

• 54:33Brooke Averick?

  Obama said they do exist.

• 54:35Connor Wood?

  Okay, well...

• 54:38Connor Wood?

  And they do, but... It's just like...

• 54:41Brooke Averick?

  Did you see him say that? It was kind of like, whoa.

• 54:44Connor Wood?

  I saw him do it on the same day that something else huge happened. I'm like, oh, bummer.

• 54:49Brooke Averick?

  That it got buried?

• 54:50Connor Wood?

  Buried, completely.

• 54:53Connor Wood?

  That would be such a bummer if, like, you released something that was massive and then

• 54:58Connor Wood?

  someone did something else. I think Trump did something that day, and it was just like, okay, that was on purpose.

• 55:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, it's like when, like, people come out with an album the same day as Taylor Swift, and it's like, you have to just move your album.

• 55:08Connor Wood?

  Well, I think, like, Taylor Swift would usually come out with an album the same day as them, and that would be an intentional move.

• 55:15Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 55:17Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 55:20Brooke Averick?

  You know Matthew Morrison is replacing Jonathan Groffin just in time today.

• 55:23Connor Wood?

  I can't believe she was, he was at the same Pilates classes.

• 55:26Brooke Averick?

  Is that not hysterical?

• 55:28Connor Wood?

  Just like crouching.

• 55:29Brooke Averick?

  Kat literally just texted, this is like, this, speaking of things that are April Fools.

• 55:35Connor Wood?

  Oh, do you think it might be?

• 55:36Brooke Averick?

  No, it's not.

• 55:37Connor Wood?

  I'm really sick and tired of April Fools. It's nothing.

• 55:39Brooke Averick?

  This is not April Fools.

• 55:41Connor Wood?

  Nothing's very funny to me right now.

• 55:41Brooke Averick?

  It just doesn't make sense. And I'm confused because here's why I'm confused. Jeremy Jordan is replacing Jonathan in a few weeks, who's like fabulous. But why are we doing this like three week interim of Matthew Morrison? Just like, let's just go right to Jeremy Jordan or extend Jonathan or close down the show for a little.

• 56:03Connor Wood?

  I wish I could tell you.

• 56:03Brooke Averick?

  And it's not that Matthew Morrison is bad. It's just like, not, it's not a match. You know, like he-

• 56:15Connor Wood?

  I don't, I'm sorry.

• 56:16Brooke Averick?

  It's just, just trust me when I say it's not a match.

• 56:19Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 56:21Brooke Averick?

  So cute, not a match. That's what someone said to Tristan on Grindr.

• 56:24Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 56:26Brooke Averick?

  So cute, not a match.

• 56:29Connor Wood?

  Bless his heart.

• 56:30Brooke Averick?

  But yeah, Kat texted me last week when we were recording and it was just a picture of her and CrossFit?

• 56:38Connor Wood?

  Solidcore.

• 56:39Brooke Averick?

  And her and Matthew Morrison, like under a sign that was like, girl boss, girl town or something, just working out together. And she said, is this Mr. Schuster? Absolutely. Why wouldn't it be? Apparently they were knuckling the whole time. Which I, oh yeah. Like, is that not crazy? Built by women, powered by women. Yeah.

• 57:01Connor Wood?

  Solidcore is so hard. That's really cool that they're doing it together.

• 57:04Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. No, I, like, to me, like, I'm talking shit, but like, if I were doing Solidcore with Mr. Schuster, I'd be knuckle, knuckle punching him as well. Like, good job.

• 57:13Connor Wood?

  I can't imagine like having a free second during Solidcore to knock someone.

• 57:20Connor Wood?

  Unless I was laying

• 57:21Brooke Averick?

  Cat is so strong.

• 57:22Connor Wood?

  On my ass on the ground.

• 57:24Brooke Averick?

  I'm obsessed with his, look at the way he's crouched and his feet are like sticking back out.

• 57:30Connor Wood?

  I don't look like that. I did a solid core class with,

• 57:36Connor Wood?

  I think it was with Celsius and we all went in and there was a moment where I was asked to join in with the other young men that did the solid core class. Uh, and I passed.

• 57:46Brooke Averick?

  Out?

• 57:47Connor Wood?

  No, I passed on the picture.

• 57:50Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 57:51Connor Wood?

  I would love to show the, the other young men as a photo. I said, I'm gonna sit out for the photo because it wouldn't be, I don't think it would be, it's so cute not a match.

• 57:59Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 58:01Connor Wood?

  For me to be in that photo.

• 58:02Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 58:04Connor Wood?

  And I love when I get invited to do like a branded event with, that is like a workout class because it's like,

• 58:11Connor Wood?

  what that I put out like gave you the idea that I would be, like be a good.

• 58:15Brooke Averick?

  Oh, I've been invited too. I've never gone.

• 58:18Connor Wood?

  Match for this. I, I like to work out completely alone so much so that I've told you before. If I just start, ooh, Brooke.

• 58:26Brooke Averick?

  What?

• 58:27Connor Wood?

  Hangnail?

• 58:27Brooke Averick?

  Uh huh.

• 58:28Connor Wood?

  Leave it alone. Oh, that was huge.

• 58:30Brooke Averick?

  I ate it.

• 58:32Connor Wood?

  Oh my God. It looked like a second finger coming off of your finger. Holy moly, did that not hurt?

• 58:38Brooke Averick?

  No, it was like the skin was so dead that it wasn't like attached to my skin.

• 58:44Connor Wood?

  Worried.

• 58:45Brooke Averick?

  Hey.

• 58:47Connor Wood?

  Oh y'all, this is bad.

• 58:48Brooke Averick?

  No, I have, I, here's what I think will help you understand. Izzy, can we look up Matthew Morrison one man show? He's been doing this one man show and this is what he's leaving to do just in time. And like if we, if I can just get a Tik Tok of this for you, I think you'll start to understand. Yeah, let's, let's give this one a whirl.

• 59:07Speaker 09

  As it's best is a dance.

• 59:12Speaker 09

  You bring your steps, your heart and your truth.

• 59:16Speaker 09

  So I expect others to do the same. But sometimes that dance takes an unexpected turn.

• 59:25Connor Wood?

  This is,

• 59:26Brooke Averick?

  And this is a real thing. This is real.

• 59:28Connor Wood?

  This is exactly my set.

• 59:30Speaker 09

  The ground disappeared from beneath my feet. The calls stopped. Doors closed. And one by one, the people around me turned their backs.

• 59:43Speaker 09

  I was left sitting in the silence.

• 59:47Speaker 09

  Asking the questions you ask yourself.

• 59:49Connor Wood?

  Okay, I get it. No, I get it.

• 59:50Brooke Averick?

  I don't know if you do.

• 59:51Connor Wood?

  No, I do. I think I got like, that was like a good tidbit enough for me to like, grasp.

• 59:56Brooke Averick?

  You would have liked his telling of, his 9/11 retelling.

• 1:00:03Brooke Averick?

  As well.

• 1:00:04Connor Wood?

  Why do you think I would have liked that?

• 1:00:05Brooke Averick?

  It's a, it's a, it's a unique perspective.

• 1:00:09Connor Wood?

  You think I would have liked Matthew Morrison's unique retelling of the 9/11 experience?

• 1:00:13Brooke Averick?

  I do. His 9/11 experience.

• 1:00:15Connor Wood?

  Where was he?

• 1:00:17Brooke Averick?

  But you'll have to watch the clip.

• 1:00:18Connor Wood?

  Okay, I'll watch it in the, in the bonus. Okay, well, why not? I'll hit, I'll hit it here.

• 1:00:25Connor Wood?

  I think I get it. The concept of Matthew Morrison getting cheated on on 9/11 and that's what he's speaking about here?

• 1:00:31Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:31Connor Wood?

  Here's my 9/11. I was, I was being cheated on.

• 1:00:34Brooke Averick?

  On 9/11, though.

• 1:00:37Brooke Averick?

  He's talking about his experience 9/11 rushing home to his girlfriend, opened the door, she's in bed with another man. But like, he told it, like, in, in his Matthew Morrison way.

• 1:00:47Connor Wood?

  Oh, and that was at City Winery?

• 1:00:49Brooke Averick?

  He was at City Winery?

• 1:00:50Connor Wood?

  Nashville.

• 1:00:52Brooke Averick?

  Oh, cool.

• 1:00:55Brooke Averick?

  Oh, he's there right now. Yeah, I wanted to go see him, but no one would go with me.

• 1:00:59Connor Wood?

  I would go.

• 1:01:00Brooke Averick?

  Would you?

• 1:01:00Connor Wood?

  Yeah, I told you this.

• 1:01:01Brooke Averick?

  But now he's doing, just in time.

• 1:01:04Connor Wood?

  Oh, so it's not available.

• 1:01:05Brooke Averick?

  That's the problem. That's the freaking problem. So, anyway, he is, like, to follow Jonathan Groff. That's what I'll say about that.

• 1:01:19Brooke Averick?

  Do you think I'll ever really meet Jonathan?

• 1:01:21Connor Wood?

  Groff?

• 1:01:22Brooke Averick?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:23Connor Wood?

  Yeah, there's been several

• 1:01:26Connor Wood?

  individuals, like, very close to him.

• 1:01:29Brooke Averick?

  I, I just feel like I keep, like, getting close, but never close enough.

• 1:01:34Connor Wood?

  In time.

• 1:01:35Brooke Averick?

  And I know I technically met him, that, for a brief moment, at Funny Girl, but that didn't count.

• 1:01:41Connor Wood?

  In time.

• 1:01:44Brooke Averick?

  Okay.

• 1:01:46Connor Wood?

  Just take a buezo, pretty girl.

• 1:01:49Brooke Averick?

  Think I'm pretty?

• 1:01:50Connor Wood?

  Yeah, very pretty.

• 1:01:52Brooke Averick?

  Oh.

• 1:01:54Connor Wood?

  Happy Passover.

• 1:01:55Brooke Averick?

  Happy Passover, my brother.

• 1:01:58Connor Wood?

  I'm not your brother, I'm your papa.

• 1:02:00Brooke Averick?

  Oh, papa.

• 1:02:03Connor Wood?

  Oh, I need to get into like a good zone of like Papa Elegium again. I need to like, that's like a lock in, but it just has to happen, which sucks.

• 1:02:11Brooke Averick?

  You can't force that.

• 1:02:12Connor Wood?

  Oh, that was so fun.

• 1:02:13Brooke Averick?

  I know, you can't for- we should have Kat back on.

• 1:02:17Connor Wood?

  Yeah, we should.

• 1:02:19Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I do need, I wanna go, uh, we're gonna do, I wanna make a business plan with her.

• 1:02:25Connor Wood?

  To move to Carmel by the Sea?

• 1:02:26Brooke Averick?

  I'm really like, I wanna do that as soon as possible, to move to my beach town.

• 1:02:30Connor Wood?

  I don't want you to move to your beach town.

• 1:02:32Brooke Averick?

  I really like, I'm like freaking out, it's like the 30 of it all, it's like I've gotta get started on the rest of my life.

• 1:02:38Connor Wood?

  You have, you're well beyond that.

• 1:02:40Brooke Averick?

  But like, at what, like, when do you start your beach town? I'm talking about the whole town.

• 1:02:47Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 1:02:48Brooke Averick?

  I think I should move to the Keys.

• 1:02:52Connor Wood?

  I don't know a thing about the Keys.

• 1:02:53Brooke Averick?

  Then I'm like, should I wait till I like,

• 1:02:58Brooke Averick?

  get married? And it's like, I might not, you know, so it's like, maybe I should just do it. Alone, with Kat.

• 1:03:07Connor Wood?

  I'm gonna show you this Portlandia bit in the bonus, it's so funny.

• 1:03:11Brooke Averick?

  I'm just like, I wish I knew an exact timeline of how my life was gonna play out, so I could plan accordingly around my beach town.

• 1:03:18Connor Wood?

  There's several movies about that and it never works out in the way that you think.

• 1:03:21Brooke Averick?

  I know, so that's why I'm like, then I should just do it now. Cause it's like, what am I waiting for?

• 1:03:25Connor Wood?

  I know.

• 1:03:26Brooke Averick?

  I don't know.

• 1:03:26Connor Wood?

  You're waiting, you have so much happening right now. Maybe wait until you have a lull like I have. Maybe I should start a beach town.

• 1:03:33Brooke Averick?

  I think maybe I should just play Tiny Bookshop again.

• 1:03:37Brooke Averick?

  But I, I gotta crank up the volume.

• 1:03:41Connor Wood?

  Turn it up a notch.

• 1:03:42Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, let's turn it up a notch.

• 1:03:44Connor Wood?

  Okay.

• 1:03:45Brooke Averick?

  So I'm between the Keys, Carmel by the Sea.

• 1:03:48Connor Wood?

  Newport, Rhode Island.

• 1:03:49Brooke Averick?

  Newport, Rhode Island. And I could do like a Nicholas Sparks type of like Carolina.

• 1:03:56Connor Wood?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:56Brooke Averick?

  I've never been to any of these places.

• 1:03:59Connor Wood?

  You've never been to Carmel by the Sea?

• 1:04:00Brooke Averick?

  No.

• 1:04:01Connor Wood?

  Oh, it's.

• 1:04:01Brooke Averick?

  I know I need to go. I.

• 1:04:04Connor Wood?

  Monterey is also very nice.

• 1:04:05Brooke Averick?

  Where's that?

• 1:04:06Connor Wood?

  Near Carmel, I think, but.

• 1:04:09Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, that's like Big Little Lies, right?

• 1:04:11Connor Wood?

  Yeah, it's so. I just went to a wedding there and it was great.

• 1:04:13Brooke Averick?

  Yeah. I've gotta go to these places if I'm gonna move there, which I am.

• 1:04:18Connor Wood?

  At least go do some on the ground field research.

• 1:04:21Brooke Averick?

  It is crazy that. Also Carmel by the Sea like looks fake.

• 1:04:27Connor Wood?

  This looks fake too?

• 1:04:27Brooke Averick?

  Yeah, it does.

• 1:04:30Brooke Averick?

  But then I also wanna get out of California because of the taxes.

• 1:04:34Connor Wood?

  Okay, on the note on the taxes, let's wrap it up. But thank you guys so much for listening. Um, I hope you enjoyed The Black Eye and The Carmelabit All.

• 1:04:44Brooke Averick?

  We love you.

• 1:04:44Connor Wood?

  And we'll see you in the bonus.

• 1:04:46Brooke Averick?

  Bye, everyone.

• 1:04:47Connor Wood?

  And we'll see you hopefully at our live show if you're listening on Thursday. It's tomorrow. We'll see you tomorrow.

• 1:04:52Brooke Averick?

  Yay, yay, yay.

• 1:04:52Connor Wood?

  They're coming to San Diego. Irvine is next week and then Sacramento is also next week, next weekend. Okay, bye. Thank you.

• 1:05:09Speaker 10

  Now streaming on Paramount Plus. I'm Dexter Morgan. I've been killing killers for half my life. It gets to you. You're having a midlife crisis. I'm not ready for this. He's back. I'm older. I'm wiser.

• 1:05:24Speaker 10

  And sharper than ever. Things are gonna get messy, but if I can't believe in myself, I can't believe in anything. Dexter Resurrection, new season now streaming on the Paramount Plus Premium Plan.

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