Selena Gomez & Benny Blanco EXCLUSIVE: Their Love Story Like You’ve Never Heard Before

How did Selena and Benny first meet? What makes their love story unique? On today’s episode of On Purpose, Jay sits down with global superstar Selena Gomez and acclaimed music producer Benny Blanco where they share their love story like they never have before. They open up about their personal journey—one that didn’t start with an immediate spark. Their story is full of humor, mixed signals, and that moment when it all clicked. Benny once thought Selena didn’t like him, while Selena, protecting her heart, kept her distance. But as their friendship grew, they built something real—a relationship rooted in trust, respect, open communication, and always supporting each other. Their story is a true testament that love unfolds when the timing is right. Together, Jay, Selena, and Benny reflect on the power of embracing love, letting go of past fears, and choosing a partner who helps you grow. Their journey serves as a beautiful reminder that love often comes when you least expect it—but when it’s right, you’ll know. In this interview, you'll learn: How to Build a Strong Friendship Before Dating How to Communicate Openly in a Relationship How to Maintain Trust in a Long-Distance Relationship How to Support Your Partner’s Emotional Needs How to Balance a Busy Career with a Healthy Relationship Selena and Benny’s story reminds us that true love isn’t defined by grand gestures or perfection—it’s about finding someone who sees you for who you are, supports you through life’s challenges, and makes even the simplest moments feel special. With Love and Gratitude, Jay Shetty Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here. Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there! What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 01:10 Male Friendships Can Be Challenging 03:01 First Meeting & Deep Conversations 08:48 How It All Started 16:32 Opening Up to Love Again 18:57 It All Happens for a Reason 21:08 Finding Genuine Love 27:13 Be Kind to Yourself 33:37 Don’t Let Negativity Dictate Your Life 37:55 Cultivating Relationships with Trust 48:22 This is How Emotionally Mature Relationships Work 57:08 The Proposal 01:05:29 Wedding Planning 01:06:26 Recording an Album Together 01:13:17 Future Family Plans 01:18:03 Selena and Benny on Fun Questions Episode Resources: Selena Gomez | Website Selena Gomez | Facebook Selena Gomez | Twitter Selena Gomez | Instagram Selena Gomez | YouTube Benny Blanco | TikTok Benny Blanco | Instagram Benny Blanco | YouTube Benny Blanco | Twitter Benny Blanco | Facebook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Chase Sapphire Reserve. One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves is the chance to step outside of our routine. Travel is a way of slowing us down and shifting our perspective. And with the Chase Sapphire Reserve card, every journey becomes even more rewarding. Earn four times the points on flights and hotels booked direct. Enjoy access to award-winning airport lounges, three times the points on dining and reserve exclusive tables. Learn more at chase.com/sapphirereserve. Cards issued by JP Morgan Chase Bank, N A member FDIC. Subject to credit approval, terms apply. This episode is brought to you by Amtrak.

• 0:44Jay Shetty?

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• 1:28Jay Shetty?

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• 1:59Selena Gomez?

  Oh my gosh, I'm so happy to be here.

• 2:02Jay Shetty?

  You know, I love you both.

• 2:03Selena Gomez?

  I know, we love you.

• 2:04Jay Shetty?

  It's such a fun like coming together when this, when you guys called me and said you wanted to do this. I was just like, how special is it that we first met now seven years ago? And then because of you, I got to meet this amazing man and I feel like we've kicked off a bromance.

• 2:20Selena Gomez?

  That makes me happy.

• 2:22Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, and because of you, I just feel like we've been spending so much time together. And so I'm so grateful to you both for trusting me and over the years and the fact that you've been on, you've been on. And now we get both of you. It's like.

• 2:32Selena Gomez?

  Thank you.

• 2:33Jay Shetty?

  It's so special.

• 2:34Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, it's a very safe, cozy place.

• 2:36Jay Shetty?

  Benny and Selena.

• 2:38Selena Gomez?

  Hi.

• 2:39Jay Shetty?

  Welcome back to On Purpose for the first time together.

• 2:41Selena Gomez?

  Yes.

• 2:42Jay Shetty?

  I am so grateful to you both. It's been a joy getting to know you both over the last few years. And I am so happy for you both.

• 2:51Selena Gomez?

  Thank you.

• 2:52Jay Shetty?

  This is just so beautiful and special. And because of you, Selena, I got to know Benny so much more. And Benny and I have been hanging out. We've been meditating. We've been.

• 3:00Selena Gomez?

  I love that.

• 3:01Jay Shetty?

  Eating, we've been.

• 3:02Selena Gomez?

  That makes me really happy.

• 3:05Jay Shetty?

  But it's thanks to you. It's thanks to you for bringing us together. And I was just saying, as a man, it's so hard to make male friendships as you get older.

• 3:12Selena Gomez?

  Mm hmm. I really, is that so?

• 3:14Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think so.

• 3:15Benny Blanco?

  Well, it's just like when you're an adult, it's like, I have my people. And it's like, what, I have to let a new person in? Like, you barely have time for your people that you have. So you're like, wait. In order to get a new person, I have to like move another person down the list to slot a new person in.

• 3:29Selena Gomez?

  Whoa, whoa, whoa.

• 3:30Benny Blanco?

  Because there's not enough, because there's not, you know, you start to get to an age, it's like Larry David always says this. He says, I have friends that I'm not even friends with. I've just been friends with them for so long, I can't let them go. Because they're already built in. It's like a therapist. They already know everything. You can't teach a new person.

• 3:45Selena Gomez?

  That's hilarious.

• 3:46Jay Shetty?

  Selena disagrees.

• 3:47Selena Gomez?

  It's not necessarily that I disagree. I guess I just always thought that guys have this immediate like, what's up? And then they're just like in a flow. So I just, I don't know. I found that interesting.

• 3:58Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I feel like you get guarded as you get older a little bit. Sometimes I wish I weren't as wise because when you, I'm not wise at all. But I'm saying like, it's like when you listen to something like. For me for music, I listened to things when I was like eighteen and I was like, oh my God. I didn't know any of the rules. I wasn't thinking of anything. It all comes so easily because you're not confined to like this box that you've put yourself in over the years. And then by the end, you're like, oh, you know, I'm thirty six, almost thirty seven. I'm like, oh, I can't do that. And it's, it's like, there's, there is some sort of freedom to being really young too.

• 4:33Jay Shetty?

  There definitely is. There definitely is. But I was, I was saying that. Watching both your love story and I know you were saying, Celine, two seconds ago, you're like, this is such a. Safe and cozy space to come to. I'm hoping that today we get to know. Your love story on a deeper level. And we get to access really what's in your hearts and minds because I think. There's so many interviews and so many things that. Kind of will touch on the surface level of stuff, but. I hope we can go deeper. So what I want to start with is I want to actually. Rewind. And I want to rewind to a place where we don't retell the story, but we get to relive. Your story with you. And I think there's a difference because when we tell a story, it's like, this is what happened. But when we relive it. It's almost like going back to who we were when that happened. So I want to go back to. The first time you ever met and I want to hear about it.

• 5:18Selena Gomez?

  Well, the funny thing is, is we actually, it was so long ago that we don't remember.

• 5:24Benny Blanco?

  We know that her mother. Put us in a meeting together when. How old were you?

• 5:31Selena Gomez?

  Sixteen.

• 5:32Benny Blanco?

  So she was sixteen.

• 5:33Jay Shetty?

  I didn't realize it was that long ago.

• 5:35Benny Blanco?

  And, and I'm like four or five years older than you. So I was probably twenty, twenty one. And her mom was trying to gather into music and her mom is. Amazing. The way she goes from room to room.

• 5:47Jay Shetty?

  We've had her on the show. Yeah, she's a powerhouse.

• 5:49Benny Blanco?

  Gets things to happen and, you know, and somehow she got us a meeting together. And. We don't remember that. And, you know, after we had done songs together. There was one time. Where. It was probably 2016 or 17 or something. I remember when you were in a studio, like Interscope, Susan. I remember I came, she doesn't remember it, but I remember I came in and I had this talk with you and I remember being like, whoa, wow, like Selena's really like a complex person, like in a good way. And I was like, wow, she's, she's, she's so deep.

• 6:32Benny Blanco?

  And we had this conversation where I really, I was just really left by being like, oh, she's deep. And then we went and thought nothing more of it. And then when we did our song together, I remember leaving, not, not feeling romantic at all. I just remember leaving and I was talking, you know, cause when you're a pop star like she is and you're a huge entity and, and, and you've done so many things in your life before, like people set up all these walls before. So it's like you get like, like before I came in, they were like, well, you know, this thing's like this and this is like this and like she might not want to do that. And like, and they, they speak for people so much. And then I remember we were so, me and the director were so nervous.

• 7:17Benny Blanco?

  And then the first second you like disarmed everybody. And I remember walking back and Jake was like, he's like, the guy who directing with me is like, this is gonna be so easy. What they, they made it seem like she was, this was gonna be this crazy thing. And the warmth I felt from her in that moment, I remember leaving being like, wow, Selena's such a cool girl.

• 7:37Jay Shetty?

  And Selena, you don't remember this at all?

• 7:39Benny Blanco?

  No, no, she remembers that.

• 7:40Selena Gomez?

  I don't remember the video part, but it was interesting because um, yes, I don't have a very good memory, but uh, I just remember the video shoot. I didn't see anything romantic or really felt that, but I had a really good time. And that was probably the first time after years of doing music together and not together. That was the first time I really got to hang out with him and it was fun. I had a good time and that was that. Um, and then how it kind of continued was. I was always cautious because I always wanted to make sure that I did protect myself. So to be honest, I didn't talk to him very often.

• 8:23Benny Blanco?

  I thought she hated. Really? I really did.

• 8:26Selena Gomez?

  I knew that was coming.

• 8:27Benny Blanco?

  I really did. I thought she didn't, like, I would see her and I, and I would be like, does she not like me? Like, and I, like, we weren't thinking about anything. I was like, wow, she really, like, didn't talk to me a lot. And I was like, I thought I was being nice. And like, my friends would be like, no, no. And then like, there was another time I remember and my friends were like, oh yeah, she's kind of weird.

• 8:44Selena Gomez?

  I'm so sorry.

• 8:46Benny Blanco?

  And there was like a few times and I, and I didn't know. And I was just like, you know, I was like, that's okay.

• 8:52Selena Gomez?

  I thought I was being like polite by not.

• 8:56Benny Blanco?

  She didn't really engage.

• 8:58Selena Gomez?

  Basically, we, I was working on some music and we, we went through some of the demos that we had in single soon. Came up, which is ironic because it was actually nowhere near where I was in my personal life. But Benny happened to do the song.

• 9:19Benny Blanco?

  No, no, I didn't even do this. It was like one of my guys.

• 9:22Selena Gomez?

  Oh, and you came to fix it.

• 9:23Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, and I like came to help out because I was like, oh, I want their song to, I was like, I don't like the way this product, let me just at least help them. I said, I was like, well, I'm not sure if it'll be okay because I don't know if Selena likes me or something. And then John Janik, the, you know, the president of Interscope, he was like, well, why don't you just go into the session? Uh, she usually doesn't have people in, but just go in and like, if there is something that you feel is weird, like try to just smooth it over and talk to her and get in. And I said, okay, I'm gonna go smooth it over. So I went in, it was so funny, right before I came, her engineer told me like later that she was like, ah, Benny's coming. And she was like.

• 10:01Selena Gomez?

  And here's our reasoning. I'm gonna defend myself.

• 10:04Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, you should.

• 10:05Selena Gomez?

  I get very nervous around the producers watching me sing.

• 10:10Benny Blanco?

  Of course.

• 10:10Selena Gomez?

  It's just a very intimate thing for me. I feel like I need to sound a certain way or do whatever to make them happy. And when I get to record it, just me and my engineer and maybe someone I trust, I get more out of the experience. So I just was thinking, okay, well, maybe he'll stay for 10 minutes and we'll just talk for a second and. Ten minutes turned into like thirty, then he went to the other room and I finished recording and he stayed there and then, yeah, this is too long.

• 10:43Benny Blanco?

  No, no, no. Okay, so here, so from my perspective, here's what happened. I get in there.

• 10:48Selena Gomez?

  I'm like.

• 10:49Benny Blanco?

  And I'm like, I gotta smooth this.

• 10:50Jay Shetty?

  I love this back and forth.

• 10:51Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, I don't have this with anyone. Like, I was like, I want us to be chill. And obviously ninety-nine percent of it was in my head and, uh, and I come in. We just start talking about life and her A and R is there. One of my friends is there and we're just, we're talking about life and we start talking about dating and I was like, yeah, you know, I went out on this date, blah, blah, blah. And then I was talking to her and I said, oh, my God, I have so many good, single guy friends. I was like, we have dinners at the house all the time. You should come over sometime. And I wasn't even thinking about anything. And we're like, talking about like our ideal date and like this and that. And I wanted to make sure she did the line, right? So I was like, oh, I'll stay there to like, make sure it's good after.

• 11:34Benny Blanco?

  And then, um, so I did, we left and then.

• 11:38Selena Gomez?

  You texted me.

• 11:39Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I didn't have her cell phone number, cause I, she changed her number a bunch. So like, I like asked someone, I said, hey, uh, give me your cell phone number. I wanna say like, uh, you know, thing. And I wrote, I was like, oh, my God, you were, and during that, I, when I was with her, I was like, oh, my God. I was like, not only, she's like, really cool. I was like, I want, I was like, I wanna be like, I was like, I want her to be like in our friend group. And I couldn't even be thinking, I was like, I want her to be in our friend group and I wanna make sure this thing's smoothed out so the song figures out, goes well and everything. So I said, let me just text her, thank you or whatever. And I was like, you know, you were so sweet or something, something like that. And then she writes back. I guess we just were texting throughout the day and she, she told me, she looked back

• 12:24Benny Blanco?

  at our message. She said, somehow you started sending like, uh, selfies where you looked really bad on purpose, like the worst ones in your phone.

• 12:32Jay Shetty?

  Who you started to do this?

• 12:33Selena Gomez?

  Yes. Which by the way, no girl should really, or anyone in their mind, right mind to someone they would have a crush on do that. But we were talking about ugly photos, like, cause I always say, I take the worst photos sometimes and. He's like, oh, you said something and I sent him the worst pictures of me like since like in bed sick and then, you know, me at weird photo shoots and now looking back on it, I'm I'm just thinking that's, these are so weird. I don't know why I said that.

• 13:08Benny Blanco?

  In that moment yet or not yet?

• 13:09Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 13:09Benny Blanco?

  Oh, you did. Okay. That's what I was trying to figure out. I had no idea. So I had no idea. And somehow we decide. So wait, why did you do that if you liked Benny? Why were you sending?

• 13:18Selena Gomez?

  Well, because I didn't know that it was going to be like, maybe I thought it was just gonna be flirting and and not really anything else.

• 13:27Benny Blanco?

  Got it.

• 13:27Selena Gomez?

  But I really started to, to just, I don't know, fall for him.

• 13:32Benny Blanco?

  So I didn't know any of this. And then we decide, we're like, we're, I forget how it happens, but we're like, yeah, let's hang out. And I was like, oh, my friend's having a, a, a birthday party tomorrow. I was like, you just, just come along. And I was like, just thinking friend stuff. And then, so she comes to mine and I guess she thought the party was gonna be at my house, but I was like, oh, in my head, I was like, oh, she'll just come over and, and we can just like grab a drink first and then go there. Like, I'd be like, not thinking anything of it. I was like, we'll just like grab a drink at my friend's wine bar. It's on the way and then we'll go there. You were there and, and we were sitting together and she said something like, well, you know, because it's a date, I wore blah blah. And I was like, and I was like.

• 14:15Selena Gomez?

  No, I said, if this was a date, I definitely would have dressed like nicer. And he just kind of looked at me and I thought we were on a date.

• 14:26Benny Blanco?

  And I was like, we're on a date. And then, and then we went, and then we didn't really talk about it. You thought, who thought it was a date? She thought it was. She thought it was a date.

• 14:34Selena Gomez?

  I'm sorry, a nice man takes me out for a drink. I'm assuming it's a date.

• 14:38Benny Blanco?

  I didn't know. But no one had asked each other out yet. No, it was like, let's just hang out. Like, and then we go to my friends, we go to this Thai restaurant, we go to Jitlada. And we're like hanging out and there's a bunch of people there. And then she all of a sudden like leaves. And she was like, I gotta go to, I have a video shoot really early in the morning. And I was like, okay. And I was like, but I wasn't like, cause it wasn't a date to me or anything. So I was like, okay. Cool. And I stayed with my friends and stuff. And then she texted me after and I remember you being like, that was like one of the most fun times I've had in a really long time.

• 15:07Jay Shetty?

  Selena, so you technically asked Benny out on the first official day.

• 15:10Benny Blanco?

  She did. She did like every.

• 15:12Jay Shetty?

  Walk us through, walk us through that confidence, that, that energy.

• 15:15Selena Gomez?

  There wasn't any confidence. That's the scary part. I think that's when I recognized that I had some sort of feelings for him. What I felt for Benny, it was, it was, everything about him was honest. When Benny looks at me, I don't think he sees anything but who I am. Oh, that's so cheesy to say, but when you do know, it feels right. Walking to his house, um, or into his home to go to his friend's thing. I was very nervous and I'm not normally like that unless it's like an event or something where it could be overwhelming.

• 15:58Selena Gomez?

  But with anyone I talk to, I'm able to talk to people and I feel like I'm good at it. But I just felt like all these feelings and then when we went out, I was laughing and I didn't feel like he wanted anything or there was weird motives. It's, it's sad that, you know, people have to think that way, but I don't know. I felt this immediate safety and I was very pleased that. I don't know, we were friends and then I became, I don't know.

• 16:33Benny Blanco?

  The next time we hung out, it was, it was, we just hung out at home and we just like, we're chilling. We were playing that game, uh.

• 16:41Selena Gomez?

  We're not.

• 16:42Benny Blanco?

  We're not really strangers.

• 16:43Jay Shetty?

  Oh, yeah, yeah. It's a great game.

• 16:44Benny Blanco?

  And my, my friend made that game.

• 16:46Jay Shetty?

  Oh, wow.

• 16:46Benny Blanco?

  And, and we were just playing it and we both played it and I was like, okay, sure, we can play it. And we played it and there was like a card that said like, take a selfie together. And we like took us out, she like screwed up. We took a selfie and then right after the selfie, we just kissed and then.

• 17:01Selena Gomez?

  Okay.

• 17:03Benny Blanco?

  No, that's it. And then she's very private. And then, and then basically the rest was history and we started hanging out so much. And it just like very quickly, I was like, oh my God, my whole life, I was like.

• 17:20Benny Blanco?

  Oh, this is I, this is my person like I'm gonna marry this person. This is, oh, this is the thing. This is what it feels like. It was so different than any of those feelings. And I was like, holy shit. I just, I met my best friend. This is my best friend. Nothing gets any better than this. It can't get better. There's no, I, this is my, this is like better than any friend I have that's a guy. And I get to kiss them. Like it was like, it was, it was insane to me. So I was like, I can't let this go. I, I, and it, it was so funny because before I met her, I, with my therapist, I'd made a list saying like, these are all the things I want.

• 17:57Jay Shetty?

  Tell me the list.

• 17:58Benny Blanco?

  You wanna know it?

• 17:58Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I wanna know the list.

• 18:00Benny Blanco?

  So before I met her, you know, I was a guy in, in, in LA trying to find the one for me. And I was having some trouble and I, and, and, and I think I was like, maybe not looking in all the right places. And I was like, okay, it's time to be a grown up. Like I wanna like start a life. I wanna have a family. I wanna find a person that like is my other half that makes me feel better and I make them feel better. And it's, it's, it's a give and take. It's the perfect yin and yang. So I wrote down a list and the first thing on my list was age appropriate. Okay. So that was.

• 18:41Jay Shetty?

  I love that. That's great.

• 18:42Benny Blanco?

  And it was 30 plus. Okay. So I was number one on my list.

• 18:45Jay Shetty?

  Yes.

• 18:45Benny Blanco?

  Not number one, but it was the first thing I wrote.

• 18:47Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 18:48Benny Blanco?

  And then the second thing I wrote was I said, I know these are so simple, but it's so hard to come by. Somebody who's kind, compassionate and caring. I was like, that's really three in one, but that was my, but I was like, I need someone who's like nice and is like a genuine nice person.

• 19:05Jay Shetty?

  You said something really important. The reason I'm bringing it up is because I feel a lot of women, but a lot of people feel this way. And you said, When you first were meeting and recording together, there was a sense of you were protecting yourself.

• 19:17Selena Gomez?

  Yes.

• 19:18Jay Shetty?

  And I think that's a very human thing and I think it's a very normal thing. And especially in this day and age, especially in your position to add to it. What was it that, you know, at one point you said, I'm gonna adopt at thirty five if I don't find someone. Like you had your whole life mapped out when you met Benny. But then, and you said you were protecting yourself, but then you started to open up. Could you walk us through what gave you confidence to open up? But what that feels like when you're trying to protect yourself? Because I think that's the push and pull that everyone's going through.

• 19:48Selena Gomez?

  Well, I think first of all, making plans and trying to stick to them is silly. Cause you don't know what's going to happen. And I can't believe that I get to marry my best friend. So, but yes, I, I think for me, I was genuinely set. But it was once I let go of me just saying I want someone and I wish I had this. And I wish I had that. Instead, I changed my mind to, I'm so lucky that I get to wake up and my family's healthy. And I love spending time with my friends. And you know what? If it doesn't happen, I know that I've always wanted to be a mom and, you know.

• 20:31Selena Gomez?

  So of course I kind of planned that out. I think it was because when Benny looks at me, I don't think he, he sees anything but who I am. And that's very rare to find. He knows when I'm feeling a certain way and kind of, before I can even let it get to a place where it's unbearable, he has already talked to me through the spiral. And protecting myself on multiple reasons, you know, doing, you know, doing music, working with someone that's kind of, you know, like, oh, I don't know if I should do that. But I genuinely just walked, it just happened.

• 21:16Selena Gomez?

  I think when you know, and, oh, that's so cheesy to say, but when you do know, it feels right. Um, I think that that's what happened to me and I just felt very comfortable with it.

• 21:29Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Penny, how do you feel that you almost sabotaged your relationship by nearly introducing Selena to your friends? How does that feel like when you're like, hey, wait a minute, come and meet my friends. There might be some nice guys for you to meet.

• 21:40Benny Blanco?

  I feel like it all happens for a reason. I feel like maybe me doing that is what disarmed her enough to like, you know, it's, we talked about this before, like if we would have met each other when we were younger, it would have never worked. It's like we've both grown as individuals and met at the perfect time. And I believe life is like that. And sometimes it doesn't make sense. And sometimes it's not the right reasons. And we're like, why is this happening? But I always believed that, I, you know, I don't know. I believe in fate. I believe in all that. And I believe, you know, if you're good to people karmically, it's gonna come back to you 10 times over. Maybe you might get in that moment.

• 22:22Benny Blanco?

  Someone's gonna do you really dirty, but over a long period of time, I think things are gonna go your way.

• 22:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Was it scary? Because you, you talk about being best friends so much. Was it scary thinking, what are we gonna lose if this gets romantic as friends?

• 22:36Benny Blanco?

  No, no.

• 22:37Selena Gomez?

  No, it happened.

• 22:38Benny Blanco?

  It happened right away.

• 22:38Jay Shetty?

  It happened quick enough.

• 22:39Benny Blanco?

  This was all one day. That was one day. Like, like everything really happened within. And then, look, there were, at, at, once we knew that we liked each other, there's that part where like, you know, we're both extremely busy people. So it's like, it takes a second to where you fully prioritize, you know, cause it's like, at first you date someone, you say, okay, I'll see you this time once a week. And then it's like, oh, okay, this person's getting cool. We'll go twice. And it's like, wait, don't leave my house. I miss you. Like, it all happened so quickly.

• 23:10Jay Shetty?

  One thing that you both did was you had a long distance relationship for a while, like you were in different states and managing that. You both have crazy work schedules. And I was thinking, in your positions, it can get very easy to be like, All that person's never available, they canceled again, like, well, they've got a million things, they're running away. I mean, you were just about to say you both are starting to travel together right now for work as well. But how did you manage that? Because I think a lot of our viewers are like, do long distance relationships work? And do two busy people relationships work? How would you both say you've managed both of those parts?

• 23:45Selena Gomez?

  Biggest thing in the world is trust. Um, I can say with all my heart that I trust this person. Um, so for me, knowing that I have a 12 to 14 hour day on set, I won't get to talk to him every second, which I don't need, but I know just hearing from him one time, check in with me and say, I love you and I hope the day is going well. I just feel safe and I've never felt that before. And if you feel like you're in a situation that doesn't feel like you're a unit, that makes it scarier. And then that causes friction, then it causes trust issues. So for me, I would have to say communication

• 24:30Selena Gomez?

  and trust helps, but it, it doesn't always work. It's hard.

• 24:37Benny Blanco?

  I feel like at the beginning, there were a few, uh, almost, almost sabotages. She didn't like, she was like,

• 24:44Selena Gomez?

  That's fair.

• 24:45Benny Blanco?

  At the, at the very beginning, in like her first few trips away, she was still gaining that trust. So there was, there were moments.

• 24:54Selena Gomez?

  Of sincere doubt.

• 24:55Benny Blanco?

  No, yeah, yeah. We all have,

• 24:57Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's normal.

• 24:57Benny Blanco?

  We, we all have moments in our life because like, we're only made up. I tell everyone this, it's like, when you, when you start dating someone, you're not only dating them, you're dating every single person they've ever dated, every single relationship they've ever had in their past, every, because you're getting every piece of baggage that that person's carried and that what they've learned through their own personal life, through the life with partners, with their parents, with this, that. And I had to find a way.

• 25:26Benny Blanco?

  To build that trust with her, not make it feel overbearing and make it feel real and make her actually believe it and vice versa. Like, I know that she fully try, if I say, hey, I'm just going to do this today. There's nowhere in her mind that's thinking that. And if for any chance that she, I always told her, I said, it's okay. If you have moments of doubt in something, in a feeling, always talk to me and I'll talk you through anything that you may have, that you know, if you say, hey, I know this is a crazy thing. I just had a dream and I woke up from this dream and I was upset. Sometimes she'll just say like, please tell me I can trust you or please tell me you're not doing anything stupid. And I say, you can call me anytime you want.

• 26:11Benny Blanco?

  And I'm aware of her strengths and I'm aware of her weaknesses. And what I try to do is surround her with a lot of things to help her. So if she's away and I have to go to a dinner, then a party, then this thing, then that thing. It's a simple text in between each things that says, hey babe, I'm going to this next thing. I'm thinking about you. Hey, you know, you know, we're, we're couples, where it starts to hit is when they miss that text. They don't call the person, they wait until the next, like, it's just like, I know what she needs to succeed. So I'm gonna help her succeed. I'm not gonna be a dick, I'm not not gonna hit her up.

• 26:56Benny Blanco?

  And she doesn't need a lot. She's like the easiest person in the world, but I know, yeah, she wants to talk to me before she goes to bed. She wants me to say I love you. She wants me to text her if I wind up having to stay somewhere two hours late. Just, just a simple, take out your phone and ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, done. And, and I know that, no, I know that stuff really helps, especially when you're long distance. Because it's natural, you're far away from someone. You say, I'm not with this person, I'm not as connected to them, we're not, we're not meant to be far. You're not supposed to be long distance with your partner, supposed to be right next to your partner. Like, it's like, it, we do things in life that, that we have to do.

• 27:39Benny Blanco?

  And we both are very focused on our careers and we're very driven. And you have to find a way to make it work that's comfortable. You have to talk to your partner, you have to understand them. I think people's biggest problems, especially men, are that

• 27:54Benny Blanco?

  We don't listen all the time. You gotta listen. Just shut up and listen. Listen to what they're saying. A woman is gonna tell you exactly what she needs. Like when guys are like, "I don't know what she wants. I don't know." She told you already. You're just an idiot. You're not listening. Just listen. A girl is, if a girl is getting frustrated with you on something, she's definitely told you multiple times and you're just not paying attention. So it's like, just listen and don't be reactionary. Proactively do these things. I don't know if you do the same thing, but when you're away from your partner, you just try to think of little things that's gonna make them feel more comfortable, better. You know, I'm, on the other hand, I'm like living on the moon. So it's like, she doesn't have to really do anything for me. Cause I'm like, I'm all in on, on everything with her.

• 28:38Benny Blanco?

  And I fully trust her in every capacity. And my whole life, I've always been like this. I trust everyone until they give me a reason not to.

• 28:50Selena Gomez?

  Yes.

• 28:50Benny Blanco?

  Okay. And I trust people to be who they are. Okay. And so far, I know who she is. So until further notice, that's how I'm gonna treat her. You know what I'm saying?

• 29:01Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, I totally get that. Yeah.

• 29:04Benny Blanco?

  That's my thoughts on it.

• 29:05Selena Gomez?

  No, I love that. It's the character that gets judged. It's the way, I'm not white enough. I'm not Mexican enough. There's just these so many different things that come up in, in my face that I can't help but see. It just doesn't feel safe and I don't like being myself sometimes. That's a bigger problem than just talking about it in a relationship. I was very reactive. I think that's why I was alone for five years. Cause I really needed to collect myself. I think in the past, that's why I say to him all the time. And 10 years ago, it's not that I wouldn't have wanted to be with you. I just wouldn't have been in the right headspace.

• 29:48Benny Blanco?

  I remember there was a time, we didn't want this to be like a public thing. Because unfortunately for Selena, her life is, is always under the spotlight, being scrutinized at every moment and this and that, and for good, for bad. And I remember sitting with her and we'd been seeing each other, you know, secretly for months and months and months and. And we were about to go to New York and we just made a conscious effort that we were like, we don't want to do this anymore. We want to be able to go out and have fun and like, and you know, just live our lives. And at that point, I knew that it was serious enough to dive in.

• 30:32Benny Blanco?

  Like, like that I was like, okay, I don't care what comes with this because I love this person so much already. That like, we literally said, I love you on that trip.

• 30:42Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 30:42Benny Blanco?

  She had already said, I love you to me a few times.

• 30:45Jay Shetty?

  Okay, wait, so the album, I said, I love you first.

• 30:48Benny Blanco?

  Yes.

• 30:48Jay Shetty?

  So Selena, you said, I love you first.

• 30:51Benny Blanco?

  Yes, she said it.

• 30:52Jay Shetty?

  What, what made you want to say that? Because that's a big step, I assume.

• 30:55Selena Gomez?

  I definitely have never been the first.

• 30:59Jay Shetty?

  So this is the first time in your life, you were the first?

• 31:01Selena Gomez?

  Yes.

• 31:01Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 31:02Selena Gomez?

  I wanted him to also know how committed I was and deep down, I just felt that. And I, I was tired of protecting myself. We had spent enough time together where, uh, you know, I felt like this was my person and I, I had the courage enough to say it, but I was very nervous and luckily he said it back.

• 31:29Jay Shetty?

  Did you say it back the first time?

• 31:30Benny Blanco?

  Hmm, well, there was a.

• 31:32Selena Gomez?

  Okay, well, there's been some slip ups.

• 31:34Benny Blanco?

  Okay, okay. She was, she um, has a plate in her hand because she, she had like an accident and she was like coming up from, I think that.

• 31:44Selena Gomez?

  Oh, he's talking about a metal plate.

• 31:46Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, she was, had surgery or something. She was coming out of anesthesia and, and she was like sitting there and she was like, I love you. And then I was like, what? And she was like, and she was like, I love you. And I.

• 32:00Selena Gomez?

  I don't remember.

• 32:00Benny Blanco?

  I didn't say anything back yet because I was like, I can't have this be the first time. And then one time she was with her friends. They were at dinner and she was like,

• 32:11Benny Blanco?

  oh, we really wish you were here. We love you. I mean, and then just hung out like it literally was like, and then she started wanting to really say it. And she was like, it was right when I was going to do it. It was the same night. And I was like, hey, let me get my stuff out.

• 32:29Selena Gomez?

  And like, he literally said that and then I just said, I love you.

• 32:32Benny Blanco?

  And I was like, please, I was like, please just let me out because I had, it was like, I had felt it. And I was about to do it and I was like, I want to wait till New York. So it's special, be in my house, like it would be a good thing. And then the day I was doing it, she was like, she like couldn't take it anymore. And she said it and then we said it. And the thing that's crazy is, you know, before you say, I love you. It's like this thing, it's like taboo, you're scared to say. And then after you're like, oh my God, I can't like, you want to say it a thousand times in a row. You never want, I can't even understand how I went so long without saying it to her. I say it 3,000 times a day to her and I like, I, I make sure every day I say, I love you so much.

• 33:17Benny Blanco?

  Like I love you a million times. And then I always tell her how beautiful she is and how lucky I am to have her every day. You know what I?

• 33:23Selena Gomez?

  That's so annoying, like you.

• 33:26Benny Blanco?

  And I always want it, no, and I always want to do that because I want her to know that every day I don't take any of, anything for granted. And I still look at her and my breath gets taken away in so many different ways. And I, I said it to her last night, we were sitting, we, we were in like the pool or something together last night. And we were just hanging out and I was just like, you're so beautiful. And I don't mean that just physically, I'm saying like, you can feel it. There's like a ring, like an aura around her that exudes just like warmth and it, and it just.

• 33:59Selena Gomez?

  You're like making me want to cry.

• 34:02Jay Shetty?

  How do you react in the moment when that happens, Selena? Cause Benny, we're basically the same person. I do the same thing to my wife.

• 34:07Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 34:08Jay Shetty?

  I do that to Riley all the time.

• 34:09Benny Blanco?

  We're so lucky.

• 34:10Jay Shetty?

  And Riley will just pull the funniest face in the world.

• 34:12Benny Blanco?

  She does the same thing.

• 34:13Jay Shetty?

  I was like, how do you react when, when Benny's telling you all these amazing things, Selena? What do you say?

• 34:18Selena Gomez?

  Because I, I say, no, let's be honest. I also am equally grateful and I tell him that all the time. I, I just, it makes me feel like it's not real. And I'll like, sometimes I'll be like, this seems too good to be true. Like he's so sweet to me, but now I've accepted it. I think I, I actually love it so much that it just makes me want to give him that support and that love back. So, uh, it's safe to say I feel much safer doing that now and I like it.

• 34:56Jay Shetty?

  I think so many people. Feel that when someone's that nice, and that's coming from someone who's like that myself with friends, family, and obviously with my, with my wife too. A lot of the time, that's seen as a weakness. Like, people kind of look down on it when someone's that open about their feelings, especially I get asked that a lot when I'm giving relationship or dating advice. People be like, oh no, but if, if I come on too strong, people get turned off. What this time was different for you, where it's like, he's, he's being really affectionate, he's being really open, but there's a part of you that realizes that's what you want and that's what you deserve.

• 35:31Selena Gomez?

  Because the world has become so hard to please, if you will. I'm called fake, I'm called, I, it's, it's insincere, it's fake, all of this, like, it just doesn't feel safe and I don't like being myself sometimes. And that's a rea, that's a bigger problem than just talking about it in a relationship. Because it makes you feel like you have to question the way you're acting. And I genuinely, yeah, I have really bad days and sometimes I don't have the energy to do what I'm doing, but

• 36:13Selena Gomez?

  I try ninety-nine percent of the time to be kind and to just be happy and grateful for what I have. And that just almost isn't cool anymore. And I hope that that conversation can kind of start eventually because it's not, it's not good. I want to always be that person that I was, but it gets harder and harder. What I felt for Benny, it was, it was, everything about him was honest. It wasn't just that he was honest with me, he was honest about where he was at in life and um, he'll tell me anything that he's feeling and it made me feel like I could do the same. But he's the one person.

• 36:57Selena Gomez?

  You know, when you're saying those nice things to me, babe, it's like so sweet. But I believe in to where I'm not gonna believe someone who is blowing smoke up my butt to just make me feel good. He's saying it because he means it and I believe it.

• 37:14Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's beautiful. That honesty that someone has in every area of their life, including their bad days, their tough days, their challenging days, then when they're saying that.

• 37:24Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 37:25Jay Shetty?

  Whether their day is good or bad and they feel that way, it resonates with us. I think we all, we all sense that. And I, I, I love what you said. I think it's so important that we make it cool again to care for people and be cared for and we make it cool again to love people and feel loved and we make it cool again for people to be kind and to receive kindness.

• 37:43Benny Blanco?

  I feel like it's like a macho thing, like guys.

• 37:45Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 37:46Benny Blanco?

  Guys are always trying, it's like, stop trying to be cool. Like, it's like, guys try to be so cool and like, they don't want, I think it's cool to show your emotions. I think it's cool to tell you the person, like, I call my mom and up and I tell her how beautiful she is too. Like, and I, I, I think it's cool to make people feel good. I think it's cool to like, you know, I just feel like people like are trying to push people down a lot sometimes, like to make themselves feel better, but you look so much cooler and so much better if you're making other people feel.

• 38:14Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, but it's not even that you as local, you'd feel like a better person.

• 38:18Benny Blanco?

  That's what I'm saying though, but it's like, I don't understand why people like choose not to do that. And it's like.

• 38:23Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, it's, it's something I'm very passionate about, something that I do want to start talking about more. I wanna be a good example. I'm not the perfect person. Lord knows I've made tons of mistakes and continue and will continue to.

• 38:40Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 38:41Selena Gomez?

  But I think it's important that we talk about that.

• 38:44Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I'm really glad you both raised it because I think so many of us are actually accepting less than we deserve.

• 38:50Selena Gomez?

  Mm hmm.

• 38:50Jay Shetty?

  Because we want what's cool, not what we deserve.

• 38:53Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, like me explaining to you right now, I wanna change my whole approach to anything because of like one thing that I did. Like, that's sad. I don't have to change who I am, like. That was hurtful, for sure.

• 39:09Benny Blanco?

  I don't ever wanna do, I don't do any of that. Like, when some people, I don't care what's going on.

• 39:14Selena Gomez?

  No, he's great at that, which helps me not care as much, but.

• 39:17Benny Blanco?

  I don't care about what anyone says. I don't care about comments. I don't care about press. I don't care about interview. I don't care about what anyone says.

• 39:25Selena Gomez?

  And I love that.

• 39:26Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I just try to.

• 39:26Jay Shetty?

  Have you always been that way?

• 39:27Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 39:28Jay Shetty?

  What, what made you that confident? Cause I think a lot of people need to hear that.

• 39:31Benny Blanco?

  Cause it's like this, okay, why are you reading the comments? Okay, there's two reasons. You're either reading the comment because you want people to be like, oh my God, I love you.

• 39:41Selena Gomez?

  Validation.

• 39:42Benny Blanco?

  Or you want someone to say, you piece of shit, you're ugly, you look like shit. You know what I'm saying? And it's like, and you don't need either one of those answers. I'd rather just free fall through life and I don't need to know any of that stuff. And I don't, I've never even read an interview back ever that I've ever done. I don't look at the pictures. Like, I ask my manager, I say, hey, did I say something stupid in the interview? And if he says yes, I say, what did I say that was stupid? Or I say, okay, great. If it's something like, I don't wanna know. There's always gonna be someone trying to bring you down. Hating is free, okay? So people are gonna be hating all over the world. They're gonna be hating from their bedroom. They're gonna be that.

• 40:23Benny Blanco?

  And I just don't even understand it. I've never even thought in my mind to like, to like, go on someone's page, be like, Jay, that shirt's ugly. Why'd you wear that? Those stripes look like shit, Jay. No, I never even thought about that. Like, if anything, I write like, oh my God, I love this show, Jay. Like, I, I, and I just don't think, we live in this weird world where people seek validation in so many different ways. And I don't think, be, and I know it's hard. I know it's hard and people wanna, and you wanna read the comments. You wanna look at it, but I just don't think I'm gonna gain anything from it. In that time, I could be looking at those comments. I could be hanging out with my friends or like going on a walk or eating something delicious.

• 41:04Selena Gomez?

  It'd be much healthier.

• 41:06Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think, I think you have that too, and it's why you've been so successful in music, Benny, yourself. Because I think you can create original sound because it's not trying to be like someone. Or impress someone else like it's it's partly why you're so good at your craft.

• 41:21Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 41:21Jay Shetty?

  Because to make great music, to invent new sounds, to create new genres, to create spaces for artists to play in. It requires that confidence in, I'm not trying to sound like this, I'm not trying to be like this, I'm not trying to impress. So it's really interesting too, because I feel like when you're growing up, your whole life, you're told to fit in.

• 41:40Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 41:40Jay Shetty?

  And then when you grow up, you have to stand out. But then when you stand out, then everyone has a chance to point fingers. Because when you're doing something differently, that's the only time.

• 41:48Benny Blanco?

  Of course.

• 41:49Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 41:50Jay Shetty?

  If you kind of follow what everyone else is doing, no one will ever point fingers.

• 41:53Benny Blanco?

  Do you do you read the comments?

• 41:55Jay Shetty?

  No, I'm the same as you, but I I got really good advice early on as well. I remember someone saying to me, they said, Jay, you get, if you get a hundred comments, you're gonna look through all of them to find the one that's negative.

• 42:07Benny Blanco?

  Of course.

• 42:08Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, that's where you go to your.

• 42:10Benny Blanco?

  Of course.

• 42:10Jay Shetty?

  And then you make it out, like that one negative comment is the entire comment section. And so if someone said, Jay, those stripes are ugly, I'm now walking around my whole life thinking the stripes are ugly.

• 42:21Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 42:22Jay Shetty?

  And let's get honest, that goes even deeper. If someone says something about you when you were saying like, someone called you fake or someone.

• 42:28Selena Gomez?

  Well, I was basically also gonna point out that women have it much worse.

• 42:33Jay Shetty?

  Please tell, yeah, tell us about it from your perspective.

• 42:35Selena Gomez?

  From my perspective, it's it's pretty wild. And I think this isn't news to anybody that obviously women have a lot more intense feelings from their appearance to, you know, what they are wearing to everything. And I'm saying this is to me when I get prepared for an event. Ninety percent of the time, I'm just like, I just hope I can take the picture and sit down. It's the character that gets judged. It's the way I'm not white enough, I'm not Mexican enough, I'm.

• 43:14Selena Gomez?

  I I don't know, there's just these so many different things that come up in in my face that I can't help but see. But I I fall victim to like looking at at things and it really it doesn't add to your life, but it's just so difficult from the choices of you know, the people you date. It's like, nobody cares about those kind of things with men. They're just like, yeah, they they did that. They said that they, you know, they did this. And so I think we just carry a lot. Oh, yeah, my weight's a big one, too. Everyone just has something to say and it's really making me sad and not even sad, because you know what? No, I'm not a victim, everyone. I just think it's made me a tad bitter.

• 43:59Selena Gomez?

  And I feel really guilty for saying that, but it's true. I I don't know.

• 44:04Jay Shetty?

  It's a really interesting time, isn't it? Because and I'm so happy that you both are talking about this because I feel like on one end, we're all like body positivity, let's talk about mental health, let's protect each other. Like, there's this whole conversation. And then on the other side, we're like pointing fingers at people about their weight and their appearance. And whatever else it is, like you said, judgments of character, especially you saying with women. And I find that so interesting because I'm like, wait a minute. Don't we realize that the same people who are saying mental health matters?

• 44:34Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 44:35Jay Shetty?

  Are the same people that are pointing fingers at people that can affect people's mental health?

• 44:39Selena Gomez?

  I'm just happier that I don't have that, you know, I had to stop after a while and I still take breaks completely because I'm human. So of course, sometimes I read things and but I do most of the time ignore most of everything. I don't have anything on my phone at the moment. So there are ways to combat it. I'm doing it. I'm not in like um I'm not in like I hate it. I understand the power of what social media is. It's just um tricky.

• 45:10Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, it is very tricky. But thank you, guys. Yeah, thank you for opening up about it because I can imagine it just gets exhausting after a while. It's just like just tired of it, you know, it just because it's all the same and you're processing all the same stuff. But what about you, Selena? What's been the way that you've been able to manage your crazy work schedule? Staying committed to the relationship, finding time to make memories and make space?

• 45:33Selena Gomez?

  I think, you know, I will say It's hard, it's very hard for me. And like Benny said in the beginning, it was very difficult for me to take trips away. It just makes me feel. Once I understood and got to know him and I wasn't afraid to tell him like, hey, I just wanna make sure like. It's not that I don't trust you. Can you just text me before you, you know, go to your next thing? And I was able to do that with him and he wasn't combative. He wasn't like, why? I don't.

• 46:07Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 46:07Selena Gomez?

  What? You don't trust me? It was just sort of like, yeah, I could totally do that. And with that day by day, I feel more and more open and. You know, we're gonna be separated again while I go shoot in New York and um. Yeah, I'm ready for it. I think it's it's doable, but it's not fun.

• 46:29Jay Shetty?

  Exactly. It's not fun, but but it found it sounds like you've found a system. That works for you and the the system is so simple. Is literally just listening to the other person. If the other person says, hey, I need this. It's not now like a debate around whether they don't trust you, because I think a lot of us. If someone said that to you, Benny, like it would be easy for your reaction to be like. Well, how can you not trust me? Like, you always know where I am. Like, how, why do I have to do this every day? Like, you could have that reaction, but. That reaction doesn't make the relationship better. And I think that's where often that goes where someone vulnerably.

• 47:04Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 47:04Jay Shetty?

  Says, hey, all I need is this. If someone's coming at you with a certain energy. You're already gonna buck back. Like, she always comes in a way where she's like, well, I didn't like this because of this, this and this. I'm like. She said it's so nice that I have to. I'm like, no, cuz I'm like, shit, I have to approach this in a different way. Because she came at it with such class and effort. So like, I'm not gonna come back at her like that. I'm gonna come back at her and say, well. I agree with what you're saying or you know, I disagree and here's why, you know? And and that's how we talk through everything.

• 47:39Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 47:39Jay Shetty?

  And then another thing was I really wanted a person.

• 47:43Benny Blanco?

  That when I wake up, I think to myself, I'm like, how can I make Selena's day better? Like, how, what can I do in my day to make her day better? Because then that makes my day better. And I wanted to find a person like that. And I know when Selena wakes up, like, the first thing she's thinking is like, how can I make his day better? And we have such a give and take. Like, I could never even see a world where I would ever yell at her. She would ever yell at me, like, we don't argue like that. Like, I feel like, I feel like we just have conversations. Like, there's never an argument. Sometimes she'll say, this is so funny.

• 48:17Selena Gomez?

  Oh, boy.

• 48:18Benny Blanco?

  No, no, no. She'll do this, and it's really cool. She'll go,

• 48:23Benny Blanco?

  I'm feeling a little irritated, and I think I need, like, 25 minutes. And I'll say, OK. And then I give her her space. And then after like five minutes, she texts me, she's like, hey, will you come back? But it's, but it's knowing that, and we have the proper boundaries set with each other. Like, I don't have to be on top of her every second. She doesn't have to be on top of me every second we're together. I just want to know she's in the house, so I can say like, hey, I love you, and then go back to what I'm doing. You know what I mean? Because, look, we're both highly independent people, OK? But we're both little mushes who just need to be attached.

• 49:02Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, we are so cheesy. It's so fun.

• 49:05Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, but it's like, but I feel like, I think it helps us too, that we're both, you know, on my list. A thing was, I wanted someone to be driven and inspired by something. I didn't care if they made any money or anything. I just wanted someone to be so into something that they did every day. And when she comes back from her day and she tells me what she did, I'm like, I'm not sitting there like, yeah. Like when you're talking to your mom. You know, when you're talking to your mom and you just say, your mom just keeps talking, you go, yeah, uh huh, yeah. Like, she comes back and like, my eyes light up because I see the enthusiasm. I see what she did. And I'm like, it inspires me. And I'm like, I gotta do more in this thing. And it's like,

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• 50:16Jay Shetty?

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• 51:01Jay Shetty?

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• 51:45Jay Shetty?

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• 52:00Benny Blanco?

  We're in this place where... We're inspiring each other and we're so inspired by what the other person's doing. And and she'll help me out. She'll be like, well, what if you did it like this, this and this? And I'm like, and then she'll say something and I'll be like, well, why don't you handle the situation? Because we have such different personalities that are also the same. But we're the thing that one of us is really good at, the other one maybe lacks a little bit and vice versa. And it's so cool to be able to like workshop, like little conversations or how to handle a situation. And it and I just feel so comfortable with her like that I can say anything and she won't ever say. I don't know.

• 52:43Jay Shetty?

  I love the maturity. I mean, hearing you both talk about it.

• 52:46Selena Gomez?

  Yes, but let's be clear, we are not the perfect.

• 52:49Benny Blanco?

  No, no, no.

• 52:50Jay Shetty?

  It's not perfect, no, but you're disagreeing. No, no, no, but I think the maturity of and I agree with you. I think I think that's actually the difference. And I'm glad you brought that up. I think there's a big difference between maturity and perfection.

• 53:01Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 53:01Jay Shetty?

  Perfection is saying we never have a disagreement. We never have to take space from each other. We know, which you're not saying, you're saying, hey, I just asked for 25 bits of space. And then I was like, wait a minute, I need you. And I think there's a maturity in that because it requires maturity from both parts.

• 53:17Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 53:17Jay Shetty?

  For you to first say, hey, I need space, for you to say, I get it. I respect you. And then for you to have the maturity to say, actually, I want you back.

• 53:26Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 53:26Jay Shetty?

  And for you to be like, not like, oh, I told you so, for you to be like, I'm here for you. Like that, that's not perfection. To me, that's maturity. And I think that's, I really want people to get that from it, that you are going to have disagreements. You are going to want space. Like me and Riley went through that. She, at the beginning of our relationship, if we had a disagreement, and we were the same, we never, we made a rule that we would never raise our voices at each other because I came from a home where it was not great.

• 53:51Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 53:52Jay Shetty?

  She comes from a home where her parents don't raise their voices. But I was just like, I never wanted that in my home. I wanted the energy of my home to be so sacred. And I wanted the energy of the home to always have a space where everyone just walked in and felt like a warm hug. And I was like, we can't argue and then expect that to happen. But it took a long time for us to realize that when she at the start of our disagreements, she wanted space. And I used to say to her, well, if you don't want to talk about it right now, that means you don't care about me. And that wasn't true. She just needed space to process. So it took time for us to mature. For me to realize, wait a minute, you wanting space is you caring for the relationship.

• 54:29Benny Blanco?

  Some people, I get it. They want to talk about it right then. They want to. The one thing that also works for us so much is like, we're not chill people, but we're like, we're not, we're never gonna get, I like, I'm not gonna yell at anyone in my life, like.

• 54:42Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, same.

• 54:42Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, and you know, I, I came from a home where a lot of that was happening. And I saw, like at a young age, and I was just like, well, like, my parents weren't speaking the same language. Obviously, they were speaking the actual same language. They weren't speaking the same language to each other to communicate. And if someone comes at you like hostile right away, the first thing I'm gonna do, and I know she's gonna do, is shut down. So you're not getting anything, you know, and I always say this, guys are so quick to like, they gotta win, they gotta win the argument. And it's like, what are you doing? What are you winning? Like, you're gonna argue with your wife and like, make her cry?

• 55:23Benny Blanco?

  And then you're like, I won that argument. And then she hates you and resents you. Like, wait, like, don't be an idiot. And, and it's like, I only.

• 55:30Selena Gomez?

  I've been guilty though, to start.

• 55:32Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I don't know. I just.

• 55:34Selena Gomez?

  Not of you, sorry. I, I think for me, I necessarily felt like in other situations of mine, it was, um, I was very reactive. I think that's why I was alone for five years, because I really needed to collect myself. I think in the past, that's why I say to him all the time. And 10 years ago, it's not that I wouldn't have wanted to be with you, I just wouldn't have been in the right headspace. And I don't think that you deserve what I had gone through before. So I've learned a lot of lessons and I've made mistakes and, and I just want this to be.

• 56:16Selena Gomez?

  Right. So for me, that was a lesson that I had to learn because I think girls can equally wanna be right. That for me, it was really difficult in the past and he's made it unbelievably easy to the point where if I even get to the point where I'm so ah frustrated, he's like very quick to understand. I'm, I hear you, like you're allowed to feel that and that helped me shift where my mind used to go, which was a little bit of anger. So.

• 56:46Jay Shetty?

  So it was the validation of how you felt in those reactive moments.

• 56:50Selena Gomez?

  Yes.

• 56:51Jay Shetty?

  That allowed you to not be reactive. What was it that allowed you? Because I feel like as Benny was saying earlier, you carry this baggage from all of our relationships into this one.

• 57:00Selena Gomez?

  I respect Benny. I, because he's done nothing but respect me. I, again, trust him. I can tell him anything, even if it's about something that's uncomfortable and maybe you should just talk to your girlfriends. Like he is that and that helps calm me down to say, okay, so I'm going through these things because of maybe what I had before, whatever it is, it's no- nothing is ever bad, like nothing in my life I regret and I'm so, so happy for my journey and I'll continue to be. It is a lesson that you have to be patient and learn and

• 57:43Selena Gomez?

  I, I just, I can never picture myself disrespecting him, I think.

• 57:48Benny Blanco?

  Well, it's, it's also just a different thing because it's like, look, none of us are perfect, like she gets spicy sometimes.

• 57:55Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 57:55Benny Blanco?

  And when I see something happening, it's about guiding the missile, not adding a jetpack on top of it with a, with like machine gun artillery, like I wanna make, if I see her get into a place where I'm like, man. In five minutes from now, this room could explode. I'm never gonna let it get to that five minutes from now. I'm gonna say, what are all the tools that I know that work for her? That I've learned over, like, I'm not gonna exacerbate a situation. I'm gonna try to calm it down, cuz why do I wanna be in that position where we're both just like upset about something? I don't wanna just calm it down and tell her what she wants to hear. I'm not saying that, I'm not saying like to your partner, be like, yes, you're right, you're totally right, like, everything you, no.

• 58:40Benny Blanco?

  I think you listen and you say like, okay. Like, sometimes I even, I'll say like, let's not let it get there. Let's like, just talk about this. And I, I do think physical touch is always like a very big way. Like, if you're in a conversation with your partner, like, it's like, sometimes just like a hand helps, or just holding their hand while you're telling them, or giving them a hug while you're telling them. And, and if someone's upset, let them talk it out first. And then after they talk it out, be like, okay, well, here's what I think, you know? And, and you can work through these things together, such an easy way. Very constructive. It's not always easy, I can tell you that. And sometimes, we just, someone wants to be frustrated. And it's like, sometimes she'll tell me that, she'll just be like, I know it's gonna be

• 59:24Benny Blanco?

  okay, but like, I just wanna be frustrated in this moment. Yeah. And, and I'll have to redirect, cuz I'll be like, you know what? You have every right to be in this moment. And she'll say, this is why, she said, this is why I wanna be frustrated in this moment. She said it the other day about something, I can't even remember. And I was just like, oh my god, I was like, yeah, I was like, that makes so much sense. I was like, I don't agree with the frustration, we'll get there afterwards. And I was like, but I get it, I get it. And it's so cool, and I've never quite had a relationship like with her. And we're the furthest thing from perfect in the world. We're perfect for each other, we're not perfect for everyone else, but... I think the thing that's cool is that we've had all these experiences. I've had all my experiences where it wasn't right. And I'm like, oh, okay, I'm gonna change that the next time.

• 1:00:09Benny Blanco?

  You know, with this person or with that person. And I think that's when you really grow. It's when you take all your experiences, good or bad. Like, I'm like her. I take every experience in my life, my past partners, my family, my everything. It's like, everything happened for a reason. And I'm not gonna sit here and mope about like, things that could be better or different. What I'm gonna do is I'm gonna say, okay, I learned this. And now I'm gonna put it into practice.

• 1:00:35Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah. For me, I always, I always said to Ravi, I always say to my wife, do you want me to listen? Do you want me to fix this? Or do you just want me to go through it with you?

• 1:00:45Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:46Jay Shetty?

  Make it clear for me because.

• 1:00:48Benny Blanco?

  They don't want you to fix it right away. And I'm not saying, I'm saying men or women. Sometimes it's not about fixing, you know, everyone is, you know, I'm such a problem solver and you are too. So it's like your first thing, I know the first thing in your head is like, how can I fix this situation? But sometimes it's not about fixing it right there. Sometimes it's about just like, you know, especially for women who are like, strong, like both our partners. They don't have a lot of time to be vulnerable in all the areas of their life. They have the world on their backs. Your wife has, there's so many people that rely on her. There's so many people that rely on her. So sometimes they just wanna complain about something and that's okay. That's okay.

• 1:01:26Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, for sure.

• 1:01:27Benny Blanco?

  It's okay. Who else are they gonna do it to? They might as well do it and you, and you just listen.

• 1:01:31Jay Shetty?

  I have to ask you both about this because I was so excited when the news came out. And it just, you know, it was, it was so beautiful to see it go from where it started to this, but your proposal. And, and now you're engaged and like that just, I can tell. I mean, it just, it feels just beautiful being in the same space with you both, loving on each other, which is great. Uh, Selena, what was the proposal like?

• 1:01:54Selena Gomez?

  We have a video of it, but um, I wanna save that for us and just keep that private. But basically, what I will share is that I thought we had a shoot that day. And I had hair and makeup and I was doing my regular day.

• 1:02:16Selena Gomez?

  I get in the car and I'm thinking to myself, where are we going? Cause at this point, I feel like I know a lot of the studios that I go to. And I just started getting a little frustrated because I was like, this seems far, right?

• 1:02:30Benny Blanco?

  And who's in the car just yet?

• 1:02:31Selena Gomez?

  Just me and my security and he's laughing because he's just like, oh, it's just, you know, I don't know, it's a new space. I was like, okay. We get out, I just, I walk in and all of a sudden I see no one's in the room and I just look at my assistant and she just shuts the door and I was like, uh, and I like kind of walked on to, you know, the area that he had set up and um, you know, I think you envision all the things that you would do and say when someone asks you, but it is actually the craziest feeling. It was really special. He, he said the sweetest things, but I also was so shocked that it,

• 1:03:16Selena Gomez?

  it just felt unreal for a long time and I don't know, I've always dreamt of that moment and he couldn't have made it more perfect. Um, yeah, it was one of the best days of my life for sure.

• 1:03:30Benny Blanco?

  I wasn't nervous until one second before. I was so not nervous. I was doing work until one second before. I was approving masters for an album that was coming out that night. And then, right when it happened, right when it was about to happen, I said, oh shit, what the am I gonna say? And I'm so good with words usually. God, I can't remember anything. If we didn't have a video of it, I wouldn't have even remember what I said. You know, I had known I was gonna propose to her for so long. And, you know, I never cared about marriage. It wasn't a thing in my head. She cared about it so much. So I said, well, now I care about it because she cares about it. And I

• 1:04:11Jay Shetty?

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• 1:05:41Jay Shetty?

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• 1:05:51Benny Blanco?

  Found myself not even thinking it was gonna be a big deal till I was there. And then I said, "Oh shit, getting married now." And in the moments leading up to it, it's not really real until it's real. I remember it was so special for me because it was special for her. And then, yeah, she said, "The two times you said that were the best things in your life were that, and then when I got you, Whataburger."

• 1:06:20Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:21Jay Shetty?

  What's this? I wanna know about this.

• 1:06:22Selena Gomez?

  Whataburger is a restaurant chain that, I'm not sure where they are, but they're not in California and they're not in New York. And I love this chain so much because there's a million in Texas where I'm from. And I love the biscuits, Texas toast and gravy. It's so good. And we don't have that. And for Valentine's Day, he surprised me. And this was it. This is all we really did. I was on the phone and he comes in with... Whataburger and I literally look at him like I'm freaking out. And he had someone, apparently they opened up in Vegas.

• 1:07:07Selena Gomez?

  And while we were talking, someone drove, kept it warm and then.

• 1:07:12Benny Blanco?

  No, didn't keep it warm. I, so I.

• 1:07:14Selena Gomez?

  Did you reheat it?

• 1:07:15Benny Blanco?

  What I did was I got all the parts to it and talked to the people there and figured out how I could reheat it the best way. And I was reheating it in all different ways, putting it together and then, yeah, brought it to her. Because to me, someone like Sel could have anything in the world. The best thing you could do, and she said it right after, she said, right when I gave it to her, she said, I can't believe you listened and remembered my order and remembered all these things in such an easy way. And then you just did it. She said, that's what makes this gift so special is that you actually like listened to the things and it goes such a long way.

• 1:07:52Selena Gomez?

  But I did say that my two favorite moments are the proposal and Whataburger.

• 1:07:58Benny Blanco?

  I was just thinking, I was just.

• 1:07:59Selena Gomez?

  So far, he's done wonderful things.

• 1:08:01Jay Shetty?

  That's brilliant.

• 1:08:01Benny Blanco?

  I was just thinking something so crazy. Did you know, we were born within 10 minutes from each other.

• 1:08:07Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:08Jay Shetty?

  Really?

• 1:08:08Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:09Jay Shetty?

  On the same day?

• 1:08:10Benny Blanco?

  No, no, no. A, a place.

• 1:08:12Selena Gomez?

  And she was born in Texas.

• 1:08:14Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I was born right near her, like 10, 15 minutes away.

• 1:08:18Jay Shetty?

  And you never met in Texas ever, that?

• 1:08:19Benny Blanco?

  No.

• 1:08:20Selena Gomez?

  No, he can't claim.

• 1:08:21Benny Blanco?

  I, I don't claim Texas. No, I was born in Texas, but I grew up in Virginia.

• 1:08:25Selena Gomez?

  I claim Texas.

• 1:08:26Benny Blanco?

  She claims Texas.

• 1:08:27Jay Shetty?

  Got it. Yeah.

• 1:08:29Benny Blanco?

  What, do you remember your proposal?

• 1:08:31Jay Shetty?

  Of course I remember my proposal. Yeah. It was, it was very, uh, I would say I was definitely impacted by lots of social media trends for sure. I, in my chap, my first chapter of my second book, which is all about love, I talk about how I would redo my proposal. Because.

• 1:08:48Benny Blanco?

  Oh, you didn't like it?

• 1:08:49Jay Shetty?

  Not that I didn't like it, it was perfect for the time, but it so wasn't. Us, like it could have been. What was it? So I'll tell it, it's embarrassing, but I'll tell it, I'll tell it. So we were walking down one of our favorite walking paths on the Bank of the Thames in London. Yeah. And we're walking down, I told Radhi that we were going to a dinner with my family and it was in a nice place, so she's dressed up and everything. And we come out and then this random guy out of nowhere walks out with a bouquet of flowers, a massive one, he hands it to her. And then I had an acapella group sing Bruno Mars. And it was really sweet, they were great, they were very talented. Uh, and then I got down on one knee and then I asked her to marry me and thankfully I was crying the whole time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thankfully she said yes.

• 1:09:33Jay Shetty?

  But I tell that story to say it could have been anyone's proposal. Yeah, yeah. And I had food brought in from her favorite restaurant. But by the time I got there, it was cold and it was, I didn't, I didn't do what you did, Benny, so I messed up. And then when we walked around the corner, there was a white horse drawn carriage that took us around the city.

• 1:09:52Selena Gomez?

  I'm dying.

• 1:09:53Jay Shetty?

  But then when we got, so then we were going back to her parents on the train to tell her parents what had happened and I told them I was proposing that night. But we were going to hers and we got to her house and her parents opened the door. And they looked at her and they were like, what did he do to you? Because she had hives all over her face. Because I didn't know she was allergic to horses and she didn't know either. And so that was the night we figured out that she was allergic to horses. Amazing. And so that story reminded me that I did know her, but I didn't. Yeah. You know, we've been together.

• 1:10:24Selena Gomez?

  That's actually a good thought, this one, yeah.

• 1:10:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I was trying, I was trying really hard. No. But, but it's one of the, we've been together for 12 years and married for nine, so we're doing all right. But I look back on it and I look at how much of my life was just impacted by the world of love. And now knowing my wife as deeply as I do, I would do it completely differently. So I'm trying to convince her to renew our vows and our 10 years of marriage. And also because our friends have changed, like we got married nearly 10 years ago now. Yeah.

• 1:10:54Selena Gomez?

  Like how much of your life?

• 1:10:56Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, so much has changed and so I'm like, the people I want to celebrate my. Did you even have the podcast then? No, no, no, nothing, no, no, no. How long, when did you have the podcast? Podcast is six years old. Yeah.

• 1:11:06Benny Blanco?

  And wasn't she on like your first ever episode?

• 1:11:07Jay Shetty?

  She was my first episode. Yeah, my wife's my first episode. Yeah.

• 1:11:10Selena Gomez?

  That's so sweet.

• 1:11:11Jay Shetty?

  But yeah, we'll do it again. And I think it's a great reminder of just how much we evolve and mature in relationships. And now it's okay to look back and go, hey, like, you know.

• 1:11:19Selena Gomez?

  It's a great story.

• 1:11:21Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's a fun story. It's a fun story. But uh, but yeah, no, I'm so happy to hear about how beautiful this proposal was. You nailed it, Benny. You're just, you know.

• 1:11:28Benny Blanco?

  No, we just.

• 1:11:29Jay Shetty?

  You're the man. I mean, it's, it's, it's beautiful to hear. And, and I mean, last time we were together, Benny, you were talking about wedding planning. How's that going?

• 1:11:36Selena Gomez?

  We have not even begun. Um, because I think for right now, there's just so much going on. I have to go and shoot um, a series for a while and I don't know, we'll just see. We're not in any rush and I'm excited to see what happens.

• 1:11:53Benny Blanco?

  Yes. I don't even care about the next time. No, it's, no, but like, we're, we're honestly, we're so, we've been doing so much stuff. We haven't even gotten to really just like bask in the glory. So it's like, I think we're looking forward to doing that in New York a little bit and.

• 1:12:09Jay Shetty?

  What does that look like for both of you? Just you two spending time together?

• 1:12:12Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, he's very good at, at like organizing and planning and I'm very visual. So I'm like, this is what I like. And this and this, and then he figures out how to.

• 1:12:22Benny Blanco?

  It'll be whatever. She's already told me the types of things she likes and wants for a wedding.

• 1:12:27Selena Gomez?

  It'll be fun.

• 1:12:28Jay Shetty?

  I love it. You both obviously got back into the studio together. Recorded an amazing album. I got to listen to bits of it. It was, it was a, it was a interesting process, but I'll tell you about that offline.

• 1:12:41Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:12:41Jay Shetty?

  But I got to listen to it and what I loved was I was surprised. I, I thought it was going to be about your relationship. But it sounded that it was about a history of your life, Selena. It felt like

• 1:12:53Selena Gomez?

  Yes.

• 1:12:54Jay Shetty?

  A history of love.

• 1:12:55Selena Gomez?

  But the interesting part is it actually has multiple different stories.

• 1:13:00Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:00Selena Gomez?

  Some of the songs are actually about, you know, his past relationships. So I think that it was really special because we were able to talk about those kinds of emotions and feelings and not a lot of people maybe feel that comfortable doing that with a partner, but.

• 1:13:21Selena Gomez?

  I don't know, we told each other all kinds of things like I would if I was in a session with someone I trusted. And so, yeah, you'd be surprised. I mean, of course, it's not all about, you know, rainbows and sunshine, but it's it's real and I and I think these are all feelings people have felt before. And that's what we really wanted is people to connect to the music. Whether, you know, you like it or not, we're just stoked that we got to make an album that we're proud.

• 1:13:51Jay Shetty?

  No, it's beautiful.

• 1:13:52Benny Blanco?

  I feel like the thing that's so cool about it is I've been fortunate enough to make a lot of songs in my day. And people come up to me all the time and they say, this song changed my life because I would, you know, I was going through the same thing. Sometimes it is what I wrote about and sometimes they think the meaning is nothing of what I wrote it about. But that's the best part about music that it hits you. It's like music is one of the senses. It's like food. It's like, like there's certain things, certain smells, certain songs, they bring you back to a time immediately. Okay, like you're immediately transported and it's so cool that everybody can be listening to the same song and have a completely different relationship with it. And I feel like that's so cool.

• 1:14:37Jay Shetty?

  What was it like going from working together that first time to this time? Like what was different?

• 1:14:42Selena Gomez?

  Uh, what was different is I never allowed him in the room.

• 1:14:45Benny Blanco?

  I can kiss her now.

• 1:14:47Selena Gomez?

  And I just, I have liked to record alone.

• 1:14:50Benny Blanco?

  What's really different is I feel like we got to talk about stuff that she would never talk about as an artist if it wasn't with her partner being next to her. And honestly, I would take out, I would just write everything she said. Sometimes she wake up from a dream and she's like, I had this terrible dream and this is what it was and blah, blah, blah. I write it down, then it becomes a song.

• 1:15:12Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 1:15:12Benny Blanco?

  It was so cool being able to.

• 1:15:17Benny Blanco?

  I don't know, it was like therapy.

• 1:15:19Jay Shetty?

  Well, you were saying to me when we spoke on the phone, I think it was last week, you were saying that there was just, it was like a safe space to be so open.

• 1:15:26Benny Blanco?

  You could say whatever you want. There's certain things you wouldn't be able to say if you were, if I was just, "Hey babe, like I just want to..." She'd be like, "What are you talking about?" But if, but if somehow like when I'm playing chords while we're saying it, it's like, "Oh, okay."

• 1:15:39Selena Gomez?

  What a great story.

• 1:15:40Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, and you can just talk about things and you're more open. It was like a therapy session. It's like it's a safe place. And like, it was cool to learn things about her that I don't know if I would have learned ever or as soon as I did.

• 1:15:53Jay Shetty?

  Did it bring you closer when making the album? Like, what was it like being together, then making an album together and being together?

• 1:15:59Selena Gomez?

  Absolutely. We were able to share things with each other and he would listen to my doubts and he would give me great notes and it was never criticizing. It was always coming from a really gentle place and I do, I think it absolutely has brought us closer, but that's also time and spending it with him. It's,

• 1:16:22Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, also we got to spend so much more time together.

• 1:16:24Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:25Benny Blanco?

  Like, cause like our work days got to blend a little.

• 1:16:27Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:28Jay Shetty?

  It's a great excuse to spend time together. I'm always trying to find ways to work more with my wife.

• 1:16:32Benny Blanco?

  I know.

• 1:16:32Jay Shetty?

  And then just trying to come up with new excuses.

• 1:16:34Benny Blanco?

  I know, that's all I wanted to do.

• 1:16:35Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, that's how I would do it too. And you had some amazing collabs as well on the album. I mean, obviously you've launched a song with Gracie and

• 1:16:42Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:42Jay Shetty?

  Gracie's amazing.

• 1:16:43Benny Blanco?

  Oh my god.

• 1:16:44Selena Gomez?

  Oh, I'm so happy that she's, uh, she was just such a doll and so talented and you've known her, so I shouldn't say that since she was like thirteen, but I love her.

• 1:16:56Benny Blanco?

  Did you interview her yet?

• 1:16:57Jay Shetty?

  No, no, I haven't yet, yeah. You've been a fan for a while?

• 1:16:59Benny Blanco?

  I've known her since she was fourteen.

• 1:17:02Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 1:17:02Benny Blanco?

  So to see where, I put her on an album like five years ago.

• 1:17:06Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 1:17:06Benny Blanco?

  So like to see where she's gone is so cool. And you know, I'm always one who like loves new talent, new artists and she's great. She has such a great point of view. Her writing comes from such a good place and it's just like, I love people where it feels like they're like, and Selena does it too, where it feels like they're just kind of talking to you. And then you're like, "Oh wait, I'm listening to a song." But like, "What? What?" You know? Yeah, it's just, you know, making the album with her, I felt like it taught me. I was just like, We're really good at communicating with each other and saying like and setting boundaries and saying when we like something, when we don't like something.

• 1:17:42Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. How do you do that when you're in a relationship? You're like, I don't like the sound of that. Like that.

• 1:17:45Selena Gomez?

  We're both, I think it comes down to ego and we both don't really have that. So if we disagree on something, it's like, okay, agree to disagree. Like, that's fine. But yeah, of course, if I say, I don't know if I like that. He, he most of the time doesn't even question it and just is really receptive to my. Yeah, we just don't have an ego. So it doesn't matter. He could say, no, I don't like it. And I'd be like, okay.

• 1:18:13Jay Shetty?

  That's amazing. What are you hoping that, is there a song on there that you're really excited for fans to hear or anything specific?

• 1:18:19Benny Blanco?

  I think I want people to hear the whole body of work. And like, I don't really think about music like that. I make it for myself. And luckily, people happen to like some of it. And we started this thing in our room and we recorded the whole album in the house. And with our.

• 1:18:37Jay Shetty?

  That's so intimate. That's, have you ever done that before?

• 1:18:40Benny Blanco?

  Not like this.

• 1:18:41Jay Shetty?

  No, yeah.

• 1:18:41Benny Blanco?

  No, no. And it was like, it kind of blurred reality a little. It was the most fun I ever had. And I just like, wanted a piece of music to be able to, I don't know, one day like show our kids and be like, look at this. Like, look at this thing mommy and daddy made.

• 1:18:59Jay Shetty?

  That's pretty amazing.

• 1:19:00Benny Blanco?

  And it like, I can't believe it. Like, it's so cool to me.

• 1:19:04Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:04Benny Blanco?

  I don't care what happens with it. I was just like so excited to do this with the person I love and freeze a moment in time in a way that not a lot of people have the ability to do. And like, we had, we were lucky enough to do that.

• 1:19:20Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Selena, you mentioned earlier, always wanting to be a mom. And Fanny, you just mentioned kids. Is that? Are you both like big family, big lots of kids?

• 1:19:28Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, I mean, I don't know what will happen, obviously, but I I love children. I mean, I've been.

• 1:19:36Jay Shetty?

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• 1:21:40Selena Gomez?

  Eleven year old sister that I absolutely adore and I'm still doing Wizards this this far along because I love children. I love making them laugh. They're just so sweet. So absolutely when that day comes, I'm so excited for it.

• 1:21:58Benny Blanco?

  It's funny. We'll be at we'll be at like a gathering or a party. And not many people know this, but like Selena is like the ultimate level of shy, like the ultimate, ultimate, ultimate level of shy, like couldn't.

• 1:22:11Selena Gomez?

  I don't know a lot of people. Sometimes I get shy.

• 1:22:13Benny Blanco?

  Couldn't be more of like an introvert shy, which is crazy because she's the biggest star in the world and it's like.

• 1:22:19Selena Gomez?

  I'm not. I hate it.

• 1:22:21Benny Blanco?

  When she walks into a room. To him. Her ma- yeah, her main goal is to like disappear into the crowd. That's like her. Her goal is to just like everyone. It's it's my mom is very similar. Her and my mom are very similar and they're, you know, they're never gonna, if there's a crowd of people, they're never gonna like be like how like me or probably you would do. We're like, but I don't know, like we're talking, they're not gonna do that. They're like wait and say like one thing throughout the night that winds up being like the most poignant or funny thing of the night. But like, I'm gonna have diarrhea the mouth talking to everyone. And whenever there's kids at a place, it's the only time I see her do that. She immediately goes to kids and like has these conversations for like hours with the kids. It's taking care with the kids.

• 1:23:05Benny Blanco?

  And I think it's also, I think it probably also has to do with like, when you started doing this, you were a kid and that was your way to connect to people. And I feel like you still feel like you have that obligation to connect with like young kids because you made some, you shaped so many young people's lives, whether it was Barney, whether it was Wizards. And I feel like you're still finding your way to do that. And it's so crazy just to see. You know, because she's transcended into so many different categories. It's so hard to call her like, you know, a pop star or this and actress. So that, you know, you don't know what to call. There's so much of a multi hyphenate. Yeah. Just your name.

• 1:23:43Selena Gomez?

  Oh, God.

• 1:23:43Benny Blanco?

  You notice it sometimes when we see people because. You'll see a little girl come up to her cry. Then you'll see her older sister that's like twenty. Then you'll see the mother and then the grandmother. So like, it's like she's hitting all these boxes in people's lives and touching so many people. And you know, she's such a hermit that she doesn't even realize it all the time. And you know, I'm always reminding her of like what she's doing and how special it is and how she's always been so, you know, outspoken and will always say what's on her mind and is always, you know, just, I just, I just feel like she's,

• 1:24:23Benny Blanco?

  there's not a lot of people who are like just absolutely authentically themselves. And like, that's what draws me towards her more than anything else. She's always gonna tell you how she's feeling. She's always gonna be herself. She's never gonna try to be somebody else.

• 1:24:40Jay Shetty?

  Well said.

• 1:24:41Selena Gomez?

  You know, I love that.

• 1:24:43Jay Shetty?

  Oh, Benny and Selena, I'm so grateful to you both for just opening your hearts, being so.

• 1:24:49Selena Gomez?

  Only with you. Only with you.

• 1:24:52Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I can't believe you got her to say some of this stuff. She never said.

• 1:24:55Selena Gomez?

  Very, very.

• 1:24:56Benny Blanco?

  She would never say any of this.

• 1:24:57Jay Shetty?

  Is there anything you didn't say that I, that you wanted to say?

• 1:25:00Selena Gomez?

  No.

• 1:25:02Jay Shetty?

  No, I mean, I mean that in a.

• 1:25:03Selena Gomez?

  I actually am thinking, I, I just, I'm just really grateful that people like you exist. Because you, you bring so much joy to people and also understanding, you know, so many different ways of life and navigating that. And I think you're a great example. So I just would like to say thank you. I trust you with that information. And it's always a pleasure to be with you. So thanks for having us.

• 1:25:33Jay Shetty?

  No, you're both, you're both just so special. You've always been. I've always said, Selena, for years that, you know, no matter, and those moments where I could tell you were shy or wanting to disappear, but always being so gracious and kind to me and my wife. Whenever we were together and making us feel comfortable, even if you felt uncomfortable. And Benny, you know, just the wonderful conversations we've had over the last couple of years. And I feel like we've done everything, we've talked about so many different things. And we are both kind of like that, you know, back and forth, back and forth kind of people. But you've both done the final five before on the show. So we wanted to do something different with you both.

• 1:26:09Selena Gomez?

  Okay.

• 1:26:10Jay Shetty?

  We wanted to play a little couples game.

• 1:26:11Selena Gomez?

  Oh.

• 1:26:12Jay Shetty?

  So I'm gonna hand you. I'm like, these boards.

• 1:26:16Speaker 05

  Oh, I know exactly.

• 1:26:17Jay Shetty?

  So you can take one each. They're fun, fun questions.

• 1:26:20Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 1:26:20Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:26:21Jay Shetty?

  I'm not gonna take what you just told me and turn it around.

• 1:26:23Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:26:24Jay Shetty?

  Um, so we're gonna do where we're gonna, I'm gonna ask you questions. You both have to write something down and then we'll reveal. So don't look at each other's answers.

• 1:26:33Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:26:33Jay Shetty?

  Question number one. If Benny would cook you anything in the world, Selena, what would he choose to cook for you? So both of you can write down. So Benny, if you were gonna cook anything for Selena, what would it be?

• 1:26:45Speaker 05

  Oh.

• 1:26:47Benny Blanco?

  Like, what do I think she wants the most?

• 1:26:48Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:49Speaker 05

  Oh, cause there's a few.

• 1:26:51Benny Blanco?

  Four or five things. Oh, I think I know what she thinks.

• 1:26:54Speaker 05

  Uh.

• 1:26:55Jay Shetty?

  It's a hard question. It's a hard question.

• 1:26:56Benny Blanco?

  No, I think I know it. Should I write down three?

• 1:26:58Speaker 05

  No.

• 1:26:59Benny Blanco?

  No.

• 1:26:59Jay Shetty?

  For anyone who doesn't know, Benny is an insane connoisseur of food.

• 1:27:03Speaker 05

  Very good.

• 1:27:04Benny Blanco?

  I think I know.

• 1:27:05Speaker 05

  Uh, okay.

• 1:27:07Benny Blanco?

  I don't think it's gonna be the same thing.

• 1:27:09Speaker 05

  It's okay. That means you're just.

• 1:27:11Jay Shetty?

  That's okay. There's more. Three, two, one.

• 1:27:14Speaker 05

  Corn dip.

• 1:27:15Benny Blanco?

  Oh. I did steak. I thought you were gonna say.

• 1:27:17Speaker 05

  That's actually, that's what I wrote.

• 1:27:18Jay Shetty?

  That's where you, oh, you did?

• 1:27:20Speaker 05

  Yes, but I loved, he makes this corn dip that I can just eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

• 1:27:25Jay Shetty?

  Well, that's a good thing that there's more than one thing.

• 1:27:27Benny Blanco?

  There's a lot.

• 1:27:28Jay Shetty?

  That's a good thing. Yeah, that's amazing. I love it. All right. Selena, if you would cook anything for Benny, what would you choose to cook?

• 1:27:35Benny Blanco?

  Okay. All right.

• 1:27:36Speaker 05

  Oh, my gosh. What would I do?

• 1:27:41Benny Blanco?

  What is it now? What I think you're gonna say? I think you're gonna say this.

• 1:27:45Speaker 05

  Uh. Because I like.

• 1:27:49Benny Blanco?

  I got it.

• 1:27:52Speaker 05

  Uh.

• 1:27:53Jay Shetty?

  You got it, Benny, already?

• 1:27:54Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I think so.

• 1:27:57Speaker 05

  Good.

• 1:27:58Jay Shetty?

  Okay, three, two, one.

• 1:28:00Benny Blanco?

  Oh.

• 1:28:01Speaker 05

  Corn.

• 1:28:01Jay Shetty?

  Corn foot. Okay, there we go, corn.

• 1:28:03Benny Blanco?

  Corn soup, like, corn foot.

• 1:28:04Jay Shetty?

  Very aligned.

• 1:28:05Speaker 05

  I said, order a pizza.

• 1:28:07Jay Shetty?

  You're doing good. This is great. Okay. This one's, this one's a bit more, I'm intrigued to see what comes out of this. It's not, it's not about how well you know each other. It's an interesting one. If your partner could master any skill instantly, what would it be?

• 1:28:25Jay Shetty?

  Selena is very confident. Everyone is listening and not watching. It's like every time I ask a question, her pen hits the board immediately. All right, what do we have? Three, two, one. Everything. It's annoying to be able to sleep through the night.

• 1:28:44Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:45Benny Blanco?

  That's what she would want. That's what you would want.

• 1:28:47Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:48Benny Blanco?

  Super bad.

• 1:28:48Selena Gomez?

  No. I thought it was saying...

• 1:28:51Jay Shetty?

  If you could master a skill.

• 1:28:53Benny Blanco?

  If like if I...

• 1:28:53Selena Gomez?

  Master a skill, yes.

• 1:28:54Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, like for years.

• 1:28:55Selena Gomez?

  I'm sorry. He'll put on a video game. He will be well. He'll play basketball. He does well. He'll do like pro tools. And then he'll do like all this stuff.

• 1:29:04Benny Blanco?

  I feel like this is the skill she'd want to master.

• 1:29:06Jay Shetty?

  To be able to sleep through the night?

• 1:29:07Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:08Jay Shetty?

  That's a real one. That's... A lot of people are struggling.

• 1:29:10Benny Blanco?

  She doesn't sleep well.

• 1:29:11Selena Gomez?

  I'm not asleep.

• 1:29:11Jay Shetty?

  We've done a lot of episodes on sleep because that's a real challenge for a lot of people. Yeah, it's hard. Especially as we get older. You wake up in the middle of the night and... Yeah, not fun. All right, okay.

• 1:29:22Selena Gomez?

  Okay.

• 1:29:23Jay Shetty?

  What's your partner's hidden talent that no one knows about?

• 1:29:27Selena Gomez?

  Okay. If I'm gonna... I'm gonna take this to Benny's level.

• 1:29:33Benny Blanco?

  What's her hidden talent?

• 1:29:39Selena Gomez?

  I don't even know if I spelled that right.

• 1:29:41Jay Shetty?

  It's okay. There's no spell check.

• 1:29:43Benny Blanco?

  But what's her hidden talent?

• 1:29:48Selena Gomez?

  I don't really have one, you know?

• 1:29:49Jay Shetty?

  They're all too public.

• 1:29:50Benny Blanco?

  Oh, oh, oh, oh, I know it. I know.

• 1:29:55Benny Blanco?

  This is crazy.

• 1:29:56Selena Gomez?

  That's just funny.

• 1:29:58Jay Shetty?

  I'm just loving the honesty, guys. You guys are really going there. It's beautiful.

• 1:30:01Selena Gomez?

  We really like to be honest.

• 1:30:03Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, no, but it's so, uh... It's refreshing.

• 1:30:06Selena Gomez?

  I'm dying to know.

• 1:30:06Jay Shetty?

  It's right.

• 1:30:10Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:30:10Jay Shetty?

  Okay. Three, two, one.

• 1:30:15Jay Shetty?

  What's?

• 1:30:15Selena Gomez?

  Card on cue.

• 1:30:17Benny Blanco?

  Uh, she knows every episode of Friends by heart.

• 1:30:21Jay Shetty?

  You and Ravi both, wow.

• 1:30:23Benny Blanco?

  She knows all of the, the lines, every line.

• 1:30:26Selena Gomez?

  And you can name what episode did this happen and I could tell you what season.

• 1:30:31Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:32Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 1:30:33Benny Blanco?

  It's crazy.

• 1:30:34Selena Gomez?

  That's.

• 1:30:34Benny Blanco?

  I never even watched the show one time before her.

• 1:30:37Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, same as me and Ravi. I didn't know. She, my Ravi knows it really well and I'm like,

• 1:30:41Selena Gomez?

  I love it.

• 1:30:41Jay Shetty?

  I need to catch up. Alright, that was good. I like that. What's both of you as perfect date night?

• 1:30:47Selena Gomez?

  Hmm.

• 1:30:48Benny Blanco?

  Um, how real am I allowed to be?

• 1:30:51Selena Gomez?

  Uh, just to be like, I'm the worst at not wanting to do anything.

• 1:30:55Benny Blanco?

  No, no, no, no. Um.

• 1:30:58Jay Shetty?

  Old married couple, I love it.

• 1:31:00Benny Blanco?

  Her idea of a perfect date night is like.

• 1:31:04Selena Gomez?

  Oh, I have so many, but this one's just.

• 1:31:06Jay Shetty?

  Alright.

• 1:31:07Selena Gomez?

  Just.

• 1:31:07Benny Blanco?

  No, no, no, no.

• 1:31:08Jay Shetty?

  Oh, Benny's, Benny's planning the date night in his head right now.

• 1:31:12Benny Blanco?

  That's you.

• 1:31:14Selena Gomez?

  Mine's really simple.

• 1:31:19Benny Blanco?

  I never write, it's so weird.

• 1:31:22Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's, it's strange, isn't it?

• 1:31:24Selena Gomez?

  Texting.

• 1:31:26Jay Shetty?

  You both got good handwriting for people who don't write, though.

• 1:31:29Selena Gomez?

  We're definitely not saying the same thing, that's okay.

• 1:31:33Selena Gomez?

  His is gonna be so nice and romantic and mine is just.

• 1:31:38Jay Shetty?

  You guys literally reminded me and Ravi with this.

• 1:31:40Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:31:41Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's so funny. It's, alright, three, two, one, reveal.

• 1:31:45Benny Blanco?

  What's her say?

• 1:31:46Selena Gomez?

  Hot tub Benny's food on a couch.

• 1:31:49Jay Shetty?

  Romantic dinner with some small thoughtful gesture, then something I can't write.

• 1:31:55Benny Blanco?

  I was trying to think of.

• 1:31:56Selena Gomez?

  That's very sweet.

• 1:31:58Jay Shetty?

  I like, I like both the answers.

• 1:31:59Selena Gomez?

  And you're right.

• 1:32:00Jay Shetty?

  They're, they're both good date nights.

• 1:32:03Jay Shetty?

  Alright, what is Benny like on a flight? Because Benny notoriously does not like.

• 1:32:07Selena Gomez?

  How would I know?

• 1:32:08Benny Blanco?

  She's never seen me on a flight.

• 1:32:09Jay Shetty?

  Have you never done?

• 1:32:10Benny Blanco?

  No.

• 1:32:10Selena Gomez?

  He does not fly.

• 1:32:12Jay Shetty?

  Till the, oh, I thought, I thought you told me you must have done it once. I thought you were gonna tell me.

• 1:32:16Benny Blanco?

  But not since we've been dating.

• 1:32:18Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 1:32:19Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, so that's a blank.

• 1:32:20Jay Shetty?

  Wow, I didn't know that.

• 1:32:22Benny Blanco?

  That's that one. Okay.

• 1:32:24Jay Shetty?

  What do you think Benny will be like on a flight?

• 1:32:27Selena Gomez?

  I don't even know if I wanna know. Because I would be so worried about him.

• 1:32:32Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:33Selena Gomez?

  Oh, sorry, was I supposed to write that?

• 1:32:34Jay Shetty?

  No, no, no, that's fine.

• 1:32:35Selena Gomez?

  Unless.

• 1:32:36Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. No, for sure, it's a real, real.

• 1:32:38Selena Gomez?

  I just, I think it's a big therapist.

• 1:32:40Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, and that's real, it's real, makes sense. All right, okay, a couple more.

• 1:32:45Selena Gomez?

  Okay.

• 1:32:45Jay Shetty?

  What's something your partner can do to make you laugh whenever you're in a mood? So even if you're in your worst mood, what can your partner do? Or what does your partner do that will always make you laugh?

• 1:32:55Selena Gomez?

  Ah, um.

• 1:32:58Jay Shetty?

  So far Benny and Selena know each other very well, this is going really well.

• 1:33:02Selena Gomez?

  This is crazy.

• 1:33:05Jay Shetty?

  I like the commitment from both of you, extremely competitive.

• 1:33:10Jay Shetty?

  So Benny, as you're writing, how did you used to get to New York to see Selena? Would you drive?

• 1:33:14Benny Blanco?

  What do you mean, I'm about to do it.

• 1:33:15Selena Gomez?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:33:17Jay Shetty?

  You'd drive?

• 1:33:17Benny Blanco?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:18Jay Shetty?

  From here to New York?

• 1:33:19Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I'd take the boat to Europe.

• 1:33:21Jay Shetty?

  Okay, so explain that journey to us.

• 1:33:23Benny Blanco?

  Oh my god, it's so long. It's like first you have to drive to New York and then you get on a boat for eight days. And you're on the Titanic.

• 1:33:32Jay Shetty?

  That is amazing, that is real commitment.

• 1:33:34Benny Blanco?

  What's yours?

• 1:33:34Jay Shetty?

  All right, three, two, one, go for it. Go on, read it, Selena.

• 1:33:38Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:33:38Selena Gomez?

  It says, dance or rap or say a weird fact that has nothing to do with what we're talking about.

• 1:33:44Benny Blanco?

  Wait, that's what you're gonna?

• 1:33:45Jay Shetty?

  That's what you do to make her laugh?

• 1:33:47Benny Blanco?

  Oh, that's what I do, oh, I did what I do to her to make her laugh.

• 1:33:50Jay Shetty?

  Oh, no, no, I wondered what the other person does to you. That's what you did, Selena, right? That's what Benny does?

• 1:33:55Selena Gomez?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:55Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, Benny, not, because you rap as well, you're a good rapper.

• 1:33:58Benny Blanco?

  Oh, I did what I do to make her laugh.

• 1:34:00Jay Shetty?

  Oh, go on, what did you write down?

• 1:34:01Benny Blanco?

  I said I hug her and then get on top of her and then I do that little funny laugh.

• 1:34:05Selena Gomez?

  That's true.

• 1:34:06Benny Blanco?

  Okay, wait, what does she?

• 1:34:07Jay Shetty?

  But what does Selena do that can make you laugh in any mood?

• 1:34:09Benny Blanco?

  Whenever she wants, she like, uh.

• 1:34:12Jay Shetty?

  Selena's proven to be the better listener right now, so.

• 1:34:15Benny Blanco?

  Okay, wait, so.

• 1:34:16Jay Shetty?

  No, no, we'll skip it, we'll skip it, we've got a good answer.

• 1:34:18Benny Blanco?

  What do you do that makes me laugh?

• 1:34:21Jay Shetty?

  In any mood, like whenever you're in any mood, like what can they do? Like, yeah, like Roddy would burst out into song and dance, like Randy. Like no relevance to anything.

• 1:34:29Selena Gomez?

  I think my existence makes you laugh sometimes.

• 1:34:32Benny Blanco?

  She'll make like a, like, she does like this, like, little face. And where she like puts her head down and like looks at me and she's like. I can't even do it, but she'll do that. That'll make me laugh. And you'll usually get on top of me and.

• 1:34:47Selena Gomez?

  No, but he actually, this is really funny. When I try to get somewhat like heated, it's like he can't take me seriously, so he'll smile and then I'll go from being like.

• 1:35:02Benny Blanco?

  That's true. When Alice starts to get like angry, she's like, no, and I just laughed her because it's so hard to take her seriously.

• 1:35:10Selena Gomez?

  That's what I love.

• 1:35:11Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, that's true. That's true. That's usually how our fights.

• 1:35:14Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Ravi hates it because whenever she gets angry, I'm like, you're so cute.

• 1:35:17Selena Gomez?

  I know, I'm like, no.

• 1:35:19Jay Shetty?

  So what are you talking about?

• 1:35:20Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, same thing.

• 1:35:21Jay Shetty?

  I'm not cute. I love that.

• 1:35:23Benny Blanco?

  Okay, whatever.

• 1:35:24Jay Shetty?

  What's the one thing they can't live without apart from you? So about your partner. So Benny, you're writing about Selena. Selena's writing about you. What's one thing your partner can't live apart from you?

• 1:35:36Benny Blanco?

  This couldn't be easier.

• 1:35:41Benny Blanco?

  Guaranteed.

• 1:35:43Selena Gomez?

  What do you mean?

• 1:35:44Benny Blanco?

  Guaranteed. Easiest answer I could have ever thought of. That's the best question you could have ever asked me. I'm a hundred percent right.

• 1:35:52Selena Gomez?

  Uh, Selena can't. Oh.

• 1:35:57Benny Blanco?

  What?

• 1:36:02Jay Shetty?

  What is it? Three, two, one.

• 1:36:03Selena Gomez?

  Mom.

• 1:36:04Jay Shetty?

  Ah.

• 1:36:05Selena Gomez?

  Space heater. That's true.

• 1:36:07Jay Shetty?

  Explain this space here.

• 1:36:09Selena Gomez?

  Okay, so I have, I have a very weird problem. It's not even a problem. It's just a me problem. I'm a very cold person.

• 1:36:19Jay Shetty?

  Got it.

• 1:36:20Selena Gomez?

  My temperature usually on my space heater is ninety and I let it go all over. And if I get hot, I just open the door and then close it again. It's so backwards. It's so weird.

• 1:36:32Jay Shetty?

  Temperatures are hard to, everyone, everyone's got a different vibe. Trust me. Our office next door, the team's always arguing over what temperature the room's at. Some people want it really cold. Some people want it really hot.

• 1:36:43Selena Gomez?

  We have a system.

• 1:36:44Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, you have a system.

• 1:36:45Benny Blanco?

  She always wants it hot.

• 1:36:47Jay Shetty?

  I love it. Okay. Uh, what's something the other person is really competitive about?

• 1:36:55Benny Blanco?

  What are you, competitive?

• 1:36:57Selena Gomez?

  I'm really not a super competitive person.

• 1:37:01Benny Blanco?

  No, I don't know what she's competitive. Tell me what you are.

• 1:37:02Selena Gomez?

  I don't think I'm.

• 1:37:03Jay Shetty?

  Selena's not competitive?

• 1:37:04Benny Blanco?

  Oh, I was gonna, I was gonna say you are about games, but then you don't care anymore. Like, you're competitive for like the first five minutes.

• 1:37:12Selena Gomez?

  And now that's true. And then I'm starting to think, ah, it's okay.

• 1:37:15Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, yeah, she's competitive for like five minutes.

• 1:37:17Selena Gomez?

  That's true.

• 1:37:18Jay Shetty?

  I love it. I love it. All right. So, okay, last two questions.

• 1:37:22Selena Gomez?

  Okay.

• 1:37:23Jay Shetty?

  Actually, I'm gonna go for the last one. Because you both are big on this, have heard from Benny. What's the other person's most memorable gift they got you?

• 1:37:36Selena Gomez?

  That he's given me, right?

• 1:37:37Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:37:38Benny Blanco?

  So the most memorable one she gave me?

• 1:37:40Jay Shetty?

  Correct.

• 1:37:41Benny Blanco?

  Okay.

• 1:37:41Selena Gomez?

  Oh, there's so many, but um.

• 1:37:44Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, the one, there's no right answer.

• 1:37:45Benny Blanco?

  I don't mind right after that.

• 1:37:49Selena Gomez?

  This is just the only one that I can think of, but there's so many.

• 1:37:54Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:37:56Selena Gomez?

  Oh, sorry. It's so bad.

• 1:37:58Jay Shetty?

  You saw his?

• 1:37:59Selena Gomez?

  No, I didn't. I just saw like a word.

• 1:38:02Jay Shetty?

  I love the commitment, Selena. I'm so impressed. It's amazing. You're the best. That's like, all right, three, two, one, who's gonna, all right, talk about it.

• 1:38:11Selena Gomez?

  Oh, that was a good one.

• 1:38:13Jay Shetty?

  Okay, explain, guys.

• 1:38:14Selena Gomez?

  This one is a picture from the set of Will and Grace. I thought it was extremely thoughtful because that's one of my favorite shows and you can see it in the background of almost all that set.

• 1:38:25Benny Blanco?

  No, no, I got her an actual piece of art that's in Will and Grace.

• 1:38:29Selena Gomez?

  Yeah, from the set.

• 1:38:30Benny Blanco?

  Yeah, I got, I knew the guy, my, my friend's brother wrote it. And I got her, for one of her birthday presents, I got her an actual painting that's hung up in Will and Grace. And when I gave it to her, the day I gave it to her, she was watching Will and Grace and it was on the TV.

• 1:38:49Selena Gomez?

  It was so cool.

• 1:38:50Jay Shetty?

  That's, that's a great gift.

• 1:38:52Benny Blanco?

  And mine's a framed picture of our first text where we fell in love. Like, the first one where we decided we were gonna go out on that date. She framed it and like made this like cute, she like made like, like, did all these designs.

• 1:39:06Selena Gomez?

  It's like macaroni and like glitter.

• 1:39:08Benny Blanco?

  It was so cute.

• 1:39:09Jay Shetty?

  That's a great gift. Guys, you guys.

• 1:39:11Benny Blanco?

  That was one of them.

• 1:39:12Jay Shetty?

  Amazing. Selena and Benny, you are. Truly, two of the most special people. I'm so glad you found each other.

• 1:39:19Selena Gomez?

  Thank you.

• 1:39:20Jay Shetty?

  And I am always rooting for you guys. I'm forever in your corner in every possible way. I love you both deeply and know that I'm always rooting for your love.

• 1:39:28Selena Gomez?

  Thank you so much.

• 1:39:30Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, genuinely so grateful for you.

• 1:39:31Selena Gomez?

  Hey, do you want me to get you one of these boards?

• 1:39:33Jay Shetty?

  Are you writing more? What are you writing?

• 1:39:37Jay Shetty?

  Come on, I expected a heart or like a hug or some sort of emoji.

• 1:39:41Selena Gomez?

  I'm gonna buy, now I know what I'm getting you for your birthday. He's obsessed with these things.

• 1:39:46Jay Shetty?

  Thank you. I love it. You can take them home.

• 1:39:48Selena Gomez?

  Well, we love you. Thank you for having us.

• 1:39:50Jay Shetty?

  Thank you so much. Thank you so much. I hope that allowed you to share everything you wanted to share. It felt so good.

• 1:39:55Selena Gomez?

  Thank you.

• 1:39:56Jay Shetty?

  I love it. Easy. We did it. Thanks, guys. You guys are so fun. How was that?