Don’t Look A Gift Horse Meat In The Mouth Yet Again

Conan speaks with Asya in Kazakhstan about how a chicken sandwich led to their meeting, local customs around tea, and Conan’s latest book recommendations. Wanna get a chance to talk to Conan? Submit here: teamcoco.com/apply

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:03Conan O'Brien?

  When it comes to insurance, Farmers doesn't like surprises. That's why there's Farmers coverage on a page. What is it you ask? Did you ask? I don't think you did, but let's pretend you did.

• 0:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, okay, let's go. What is that?

• 0:14Conan O'Brien?

  It's your coverage on a page, pretty straightforward.

• 0:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:18Conan O'Brien?

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• 0:39Conan O'Brien?

  Who do you shop for first on the holidays, Sona? Was it, do you shop for the kids, or do you shop for Tac?

• 0:43Speaker 01

  My kids.

• 0:44Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 0:45Speaker 01

  Or Okie.

• 0:45Conan O'Brien?

  You gotta get them your stuff.

• 0:45Speaker 01

  Or my dog.

• 0:46Conan O'Brien?

  And then your husband is last. Well, guess what? It's that time of year. You feel that, you smell that cinnamon cider in the air? Do you smell that?

• 0:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:56Conan O'Brien?

  And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. Little early to buy a turkey.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:01Conan O'Brien?

  Doesn't matter. Holidays, I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliche. It's very nearby in the cupboard. Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy with low prices on the gifts you want, even this early in the season. So get ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent calendars at low prices. Get ahead, start on holiday gifting with Amazon's low prices. Shop now at amazon.com/holiday.

• 1:33Speaker 01

  Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan. Want to talk to Conan? Visit teamcoco.com/callconan. Okay, let's get started. Oh!

• 1:44Conan O'Brien?

  Hi, Aseya, you've caught us at an odd time. Welcome to the show. Hello, Aseya.

• 1:50Speaker 01

  Hi, oh my God, I can't believe this.

• 1:52Conan O'Brien?

  Now, Aseya, normally on Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan podcast, I say it's nice to meet you, but I must tell everyone, we have already met. I was shooting my travel show in Austria when suddenly

• 2:09Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 2:09Conan O'Brien?

  I was accosted by a young woman who approached me. You accosted me, and I love using that word. I was accosted. You came up to me on the street, you saw me shooting, and you walked right up to me, and we had a quick conversation, which, by the way, made it into, I believe, the Austrian show.

• 2:28Speaker 02

  I saw it in a trailer, I mean, the the short episode of it, and I was amazed, really. Yeah, I I didn't think that you would really ma- make to the show or and I was really so shocked. But I can't believe that I I talk to you again and I see you again.

• 2:43Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, well, first of all, let's let's paint the picture. I was in Vienna. And I was standing on the street with a camera crew. And what made you come over? Did you know what we were doing? Did you see me or did you just come over to investigate?

• 2:57Speaker 02

  Um, uh, okay, so the story is a bit strange. Um, I was on my way back home. But I had this strong intuition that I want some chicken sandwich. And there is a a very good like store or shop um right next to the spot where you were with Jordan. And I was like, am I that hungry really to walk there? But my intuition was so strong, like, go there, go and get your chicken sandwich. And I was like, okay. And I was on my way and then I was like, something weird is happening because this that's the street I walk on every day to get to my work. And it was um a bit loud and it's so um unusual to Vienna. And I'm like, okay, what's going on? And then I see you.

• 3:43Speaker 02

  And I was stunned, really. I was like, that that's that's that's not possible. So it it was such a surreal experience.

• 3:50Conan O'Brien?

  Well, you you know, I love that you uh, Asiya, you portray this as this this instinct. Uh, or this karma drew you to me. It was a chicken sandwich.

• 4:02Speaker 03

  That's how I got this job.

• 4:03Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, exactly.

• 4:06Conan O'Brien?

  What I do, what I'm gonna do from now on, when I travel to other countries, is just stand next to the chicken sandwich store. And I but Asiya, it was it was really fun to meet you and I could tell right away you've got a great personality. And you told me that you're from Kazakhstan. Is that right?

• 4:20Speaker 02

  Exactly. Yes, yes, yeah.

• 4:22Conan O'Brien?

  And so you are a representative of Kazakhstan. I've never been to Kazakhstan. And you know, I like to travel. I like to find out about other countries. Were I to go to Kazakhstan. Um, and you were to show me around, first of all, what would be your mission? What would you want to show me? What would you want me to learn about Kazakhstan?

• 4:47Speaker 02

  So yeah, actually Kazakhstan is the ninth largest country in the world. So it's pretty big and it's very important really to pick a certain region or certain city. And I originally come from Almaty. So it used to be a capital, but not anymore. And Almaty actually has beautiful, beautiful nature. So mountains and lakes and it's really mesmerizing the nature. So I would really invite you to Almaty to visit this city first. Yeah, it's very beautiful.

• 5:25Conan O'Brien?

  Are there, what are the, are there stereotypes about Kazakhstan that you would want to correct?

• 5:32Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, probably you know the Borat movie. So it's a pretty triggering topic for us. And I know, yeah, there is a specific irony behind the movie. And then specific, I would say, type of humor and so on. But as a citizen of Kazakhstan, it's a bit sensitive topic for us.

• 5:55Conan O'Brien?

  Do you think the Borat movie, he's clearly, you know, he's, he's, he's not pretending to depict the actual Kazakhstan. But it's, it upsets the people in Kazakhstan that that's how it's portrayed in the movie Borat.

• 6:12Speaker 02

  But this is you, so you know that, okay, that's not real Kazakhstan. But I met a lot of people who actually think that that's Kazakhstan. And I'm a bit tired to kind of correct them that that's not actually Kazakhstan. So the movie was filmed in Romania and they actually use real national symbols like our flag. And then the geography of the country and then the name of the country. So it was a bit painful to watch, to be honest. But of course I understand that it's a humor and it's irony. But I couldn't really be around being myself to watch more than six or seven minutes of that movie, really.

• 6:52Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I thought you were about to say I could only watch it six or seven times. On the seventh time, I decided, that's it.

• 7:00Conan O'Brien?

  That's very common, though, where comedians make something and then there are people who don't, who see it and think, oh, Borat's a real correspondent. And, uh, but yes, I could, I understand. I understand there have been depictions of my hometown of Boston, which portray us as loud, abrasive people that wear Red Sox caps backwards and just eat chowder, and they're absolutely right.

• 7:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 7:23Speaker 01

  There we go, yeah.

• 7:24Conan O'Brien?

  Correct.

• 7:25Speaker 01

  It's pretty true.

• 7:25Conan O'Brien?

  Um, well, okay. Let's, uh, let's pretend here, Asiya. First of all, I'm curious, when you saw me in person, was there anything that surprised you? Some people are, um, taken with my, in person, that I'm quite different than I am on television. Say my virility. Hello? Is this thing on? Is this thing working? No, I'm just curious what you thought when you first saw me.

• 7:52Speaker 02

  I was shocked how tall you are, really. I was like, wow, you're huge. And then the second fact is that your hair is real. So that was really...

• 8:02Conan O'Brien?

  You thought I've been, all these years, I've been wearing a wig? You thought this is a wig that I've been wearing?

• 8:06Speaker 02

  I don't know. I don't know. It's, it's...

• 8:09Conan O'Brien?

  You know what? It's interesting.

• 8:10Speaker 02

  If it's unnatural.

• 8:10Conan O'Brien?

  Asiya, I am, um, my hair is very strange. It is real, but I am contemplating at some point, when it's necessary, switching to a wig. Just a wig. It'd just be so much easier to strap on a Conan wig. You know that they sell them somewhere.

• 8:25Speaker 03

  Um, like talk, those generic talk show host wigs?

• 8:28Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 8:29Speaker 03

  That kind of thing?

• 8:29Conan O'Brien?

  It's something that just looks like a helmet that I just put on. The pompadour is ready to go. It's made of nylon. It locks in place. It's also got a digital clock and a pocket for me to keep little trinkets in. So that's coming.

• 8:41Speaker 02

  No, no, but you look very good. You look very good.

• 8:43Conan O'Brien?

  Thank you very much. Thank you. That's what I was looking for, and I got it. And we'll edit out everything else, except that I look really good, and then we'll put an echo on that.

• 8:52Conan O'Brien?

  So, okay.

• 8:53Speaker 03

  Make a note of that?

• 8:54Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. It's okay. It's just gonna happen naturally. Um, I, uh, I come to Kazakhstan, and you, Asiya, you show me around. You will be the ambassador. You'll be showing me around because we're friends already. We've already met. What are the kind of activities that we would do, or the customs that you would teach me?

• 9:12Speaker 02

  Um, hunting, maybe, on a horse.

• 9:16Conan O'Brien?

  Hunting on a horse?

• 9:17Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 9:18Conan O'Brien?

  Wow.

• 9:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, you, you like steps, you on a horse, holding an eagle and then hunting some small, small animals.

• 9:27Conan O'Brien?

  You think I could ride a horse with it and, and hold an eagle at the same time on my arm? And that's how I hunt?

• 9:33Speaker 02

  Oh, why not?

• 9:34Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, I mean, first of all, yeah, I mean, I am very athletic and I have great command over eagles with my mind. So, the eagle needs to, I can't train the eagle, the eagle's pre-trained, right? The eagle knows what it's doing.

• 9:49Speaker 02

  Yes, yes, yes.

• 9:51Conan O'Brien?

  And what are we hunting?

• 9:52Speaker 02

  They're also pretty heavy.

• 9:53Conan O'Brien?

  Go ahead.

• 9:55Speaker 02

  They're pretty heavy, but I think you'll, you'll get this, yeah.

• 9:58Conan O'Brien?

  They're pretty what? Heavy. Heavy, oh, the eagle's heavy.

• 10:01Speaker 02

  Heavy, heavy.

• 10:01Conan O'Brien?

  Have you seen these guns? Did you look at my arm in person when we saw each other? This thing, I could have, you could put a panther on this arm. I'd hold it for all day and all night. Um.

• 10:13Speaker 01

  Why would you hold a panther all, panther all day? That's so weird. And all night.

• 10:19Conan O'Brien?

  And all night, so it's, we're, it's a close relationship with me and the panther. You know, you ask the dumbest questions.

• 10:24Speaker 01

  I do, I know.

• 10:25Conan O'Brien?

  When I'm talking about having a panther perched on my arm while I'm on a horseback.

• 10:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:29Conan O'Brien?

  And then you come in with these insane allegations.

• 10:32Speaker 01

  I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said.

• 10:33Conan O'Brien?

  You took what I was saying about having a panther on my arm on horseback in Kazakhstan and then made it silly.

• 10:39Speaker 01

  I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Yeah, anyway, an eagle can be on his arm for a long time.

• 10:44Conan O'Brien?

  To be an eagle on my arm, and I'm just curious, what is the eagle going to, when I say, first of all, what is the command I give to the eagle in, in the native tongue? What would I say?

• 10:54Speaker 02

  I don't know, scream something like, "Hey!" or.

• 10:57Conan O'Brien?

  What?

• 10:58Speaker 02

  Come on, I don't know.

• 10:59Conan O'Brien?

  That's the best you can do? Wait a minute.

• 11:01Speaker 02

  I did, I've never done this before, but I.

• 11:04Conan O'Brien?

  Are you from Baltimore? I think this is all a put-on.

• 11:09Conan O'Brien?

  I can hear the Baltimore Orioles playing behind you in a stadium. Yes, Kazakhstan. Oh, what do I yell to the eagle when I want it to, uh, get going?

• 11:18Speaker 03

  She got all her information from Bora.

• 11:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. I just thought I-

• 11:22Speaker 02

  No, no, no. I just, I only say that I can imagine you being like on a horse with an eagle and then giving some commands to-

• 11:29Conan O'Brien?

  Well, guess what? I would do that in a second. I would eat that up and spit it out. So, what are we hunting? What is an eagle? I mean, it's not like the eagle has to capture something that's smaller than the eagle, I'm guessing, right?

• 11:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm. Maybe some rabbits? I don't know. Are you into rabbits?

• 11:50Conan O'Brien?

  What do you mean, am I into rabbit?

• 11:52Speaker 01

  I think she's making this up as she goes along.

• 11:54Conan O'Brien?

  You know what? I see you are so full of shit right now. This is just nonsense. Yes, you would have an eagle. What would I say to tell? I don't know, something that people in Kazakhstan say. And what would we get? I don't know. Rabbit? What do you think? What do I think? You're talking about this, you went on and on about how Kazakhstan is so important to you and you want to write all the wrong things that have been said about Kazakhstan. You don't know shit!

• 12:20Speaker 03

  Come on, your name is Claire.

• 12:22Speaker 02

  Maybe some onions. I don't know.

• 12:23Conan O'Brien?

  Hey, Claire. Claire from Baltimore.

• 12:25Speaker 02

  Some chickens.

• 12:33Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 12:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, I love awards.

• 12:36Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 12:50Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 12:51Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 12:59Speaker 01

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 13:04Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5N, which I love. Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 13:23Speaker 01

  Hello!

• 13:24Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space with available, I had this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View U.S. News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details. Who do you shop for first on the holidays, Sona? Was it, do you shop for the kids or do you shop for Tac?

• 14:02Speaker 01

  My kids.

• 14:02Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 14:03Speaker 01

  Or Okie.

• 14:03Conan O'Brien?

  You gotta get them their stuff.

• 14:04Speaker 01

  Or my dog.

• 14:05Conan O'Brien?

  And then your husband is last. Well, guess what? It's that time of year. You feel that, you smell that, that cinnamon cider in the air? Do you smell that?

• 14:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 14:14Conan O'Brien?

  And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. Little early to buy a turkey.

• 14:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 14:19Conan O'Brien?

  Doesn't matter. Holidays, I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliche. It's very nearby in the cupboard. Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy with low prices on the gifts you want, even this early in the season. So get ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent calendars at low prices. Get ahead, start on holiday gifting with Amazon's low prices. Shop now at amazon.com/holiday.

• 14:50Conan O'Brien?

  Technology can generate salary recommendations in seconds, but building an offer that lands skilled talent, that takes more than just an estimate you came up with.

• 14:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 14:59Conan O'Brien?

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• 14:59Speaker 01

  You're right.

• 15:00Conan O'Brien?

  That's where Robert Half's new 2027 Salary Guide can help.

• 15:04Speaker 01

  That's good.

• 15:04Conan O'Brien?

  Did we use a salary guide with you, Sona?

• 15:06Speaker 01

  Uh, no, but maybe-

• 15:07Conan O'Brien?

  For several years, I just gave you groceries. Remember?

• 15:09Speaker 01

  I know. Yeah, I remember that. That was not good.

• 15:12Conan O'Brien?

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• 15:34Conan O'Brien?

  Coca-Cola Zero Sugar is so good. It's almost impossible not to finish it before the meal arrives. It's just too good to wait. That happens to me sometimes.

• 15:42Speaker 01

  Me too.

• 15:43Conan O'Brien?

  You can try rules like no sipping until the appetizer arrives, or you tell your friend, "Don't let me touch my glass." But every time you're staring at an empty glass. So if you've ever finished your Coke Zero before the first fry hits the table, you're among friends. It happens. Occupational hazard with Coke Zero.

• 16:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:01Conan O'Brien?

  Real Coca-Cola taste, zero sugar, too good to wait. Enjoy an ice cold Coca-Cola Zero Sugar today.

• 16:14Conan O'Brien?

  Asia, what are some of the unusual delicacies that we would be eating in Kazakhstan?

• 16:19Speaker 02

  Okay, so-

• 16:20Conan O'Brien?

  And don't say chicken sandwich.

• 16:23Speaker 02

  So besides riding a horse, we can actually eat horses. So horse meat.

• 16:29Conan O'Brien?

  Oh wait.

• 16:29Speaker 02

  The national dish is called, yeah.

• 16:32Conan O'Brien?

  The national dish is horse meat?

• 16:34Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 16:34Speaker 03

  What's it called?

• 16:36Speaker 02

  It's called besh parmak.

• 16:39Conan O'Brien?

  Besh parmak.

• 16:40Speaker 02

  And it translates into fine fingers because we eat it with fingers. It's, that's besh parmak.

• 16:46Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 16:46Speaker 02

  So fine fingers.

• 16:47Speaker 01

  Oh, that's like Turkish.

• 16:49Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 16:49Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 16:50Speaker 02

  Yes, yes, yes.

• 16:50Speaker 01

  Besh parmak. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 16:52Conan O'Brien?

  That's funny. You walked in today eating horse out of a bag.

• 16:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, besh parmak.

• 16:57Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 16:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 16:58Conan O'Brien?

  It was your five fingers.

• 16:58Speaker 03

  It was a full head of horse.

• 16:59Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. It was a drive, you got it at a drive-through.

• 17:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 17:04Conan O'Brien?

  I'm curious, so you eat horse. You said, "I don't want to eat the horse that I rode." That just seems like a betrayal. You know, if that horse, if I just rode a horse and it, and it, we got food together, I would hate to then say, "I know we just caught a rabbit, but guess what, buddy? You're up."

• 17:20Speaker 02

  Oh, of course, of course, that's a different horse, so-

• 17:23Conan O'Brien?

  Good.

• 17:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's not the horse that you would ride. But actually, horse meat is very tasty.

• 17:28Conan O'Brien?

  Is it?

• 17:28Speaker 02

  It's very tasty, it's very, it is, it is, that's why we eat it, so.

• 17:32Conan O'Brien?

  Does it taste like any other kind of meat that we would know?

• 17:35Speaker 02

  Yes, like beef, but even, even better.

• 17:37Conan O'Brien?

  Really? Better than beef?

• 17:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:39Conan O'Brien?

  That's tough, tough to be. Who is, who is, I feel like then, if this is true, if horse really does taste fantastic and it's better than beef. That someone has, why is it not more acceptable?

• 17:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, why are our pets eating horse and not us, you know?

• 17:57Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 17:58Speaker 03

  Pet food is usually horse meat.

• 17:59Speaker 01

  Is it?

• 18:00Speaker 03

  Often, right? Isn't it like horse gelatin and hoof?

• 18:03Conan O'Brien?

  Not my, our dogs eat foie gras.

• 18:05Speaker 01

  Oh geez.

• 18:07Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Just the finest.

• 18:08Speaker 02

  Actually, here in Austria, they also eat horses, some horse sausage here in Austria.

• 18:14Conan O'Brien?

  So I eat a lot of sausage in Austria.

• 18:17Speaker 03

  Oh, there you go.

• 18:17Speaker 02

  So probably.

• 18:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and then I galloped for the next two weeks.

• 18:21Speaker 01

  Oh, boy.

• 18:22Speaker 03

  That's how that works?

• 18:23Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, it's true.

• 18:24Speaker 03

  So what do you do when you have a hamburger?

• 18:27Conan O'Brien?

  I chew cud and I nuzzle up, moo, and I nuzzle up against a fence.

• 18:34Speaker 03

  What do you do when you say have octopus?

• 18:36Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, man, I'm all hands on a date.

• 18:39Speaker 01

  Oh, God.

• 18:43Conan O'Brien?

  I've gotten in a lot of trouble after I've had octopi.

• 18:47Conan O'Brien?

  What about some of the traditions? I'm sorry, I see, I wish we were.

• 18:52Speaker 01

  So stupid.

• 18:52Conan O'Brien?

  I wish we were a smarter podcast. I wish we were better people, but we're not. And this is your fault because you came up to me. I didn't come up to you. What about some of the things? I know that there are some, sometimes there are customs when I go to a country where you'd think, oh, this is not a big deal, but it's actually a huge deal. And it's something very simple. Do you know what I mean? Like, how you consume, manners at a table or ways in which you eat something. I know that in Japan, you can commit an incredible faux pas and not even know it unless you've studied up on the culture. Tell me about that in Kazakhstan.

• 19:28Speaker 02

  Oh, we also have something like this in Kazakhstan. And it is, we are very big, so tea nation. We love tea.

• 19:35Conan O'Brien?

  You love tea?

• 19:36Speaker 02

  We drink tea, yes, very much in the morning, throughout the day. So it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter whether it's cold outside or warm, we always drink tea. And there is also a special way to pour tea to someone. And for example, in my region, so my family comes from south of Kazakhstan, and it is very disrespectful to, like, you have a cup and then to fill the cup and then to give this cup to a person to drink. So it's very kind of disrespectful. So we show the respect.

• 20:08Conan O'Brien?

  Wait a minute, it's disrespectful to fill the cup with tea and hand it to someone?

• 20:13Speaker 02

  Yes, yes.

• 20:14Conan O'Brien?

  So what's the alternative?

• 20:15Speaker 02

  You should only pour a little bit.

• 20:16Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, just give them a little bit. Okay.

• 20:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, so that the tea is hot and then after you're done, after like a few sips and then you get another tea. So and then you can drink tea for for hours, for example. And and when a person gives a couple that is full with tea, then it's a kind of sign that probably, yeah, you should go home or something.

• 20:42Conan O'Brien?

  Wow, that's serious business. Okay. I I feel sorry for the the waiters and waitresses. Because you come by, you give someone a little bit of tea, you move on, they take one sip.

• 20:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:56Conan O'Brien?

  And then they you're like, hey, whoa, you leave me hanging here? I want more tea.

• 21:01Speaker 03

  You gotta get right back there.

• 21:02Conan O'Brien?

  And I'm like, hey, I got fifteen tables to get to. What do you think this is? A chicken sandwich restaurant? You know, that that'd be tough. That'd be tough.

• 21:10Speaker 02

  I know, but I I need to correct you here. So it only applies when you're at home.

• 21:15Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, I see.

• 21:16Speaker 02

  When I invite you. And then my mom pours you tea. So that's only applicable when you're my guest, for example. But when you're a tea shop or a coffee shop, of course, you can get a cupful.

• 21:27Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, I'm glad we made that distinction. I will be um I will be meeting your parents. Do your parents know of me? Do they know of my work? Uh, what will your how will your parents react to me? Be honest.

• 21:41Speaker 02

  I think they will be shocked, very shocked.

• 21:44Conan O'Brien?

  By my appearance?

• 21:47Speaker 02

  I'm sorry to say this, but yes.

• 21:50Conan O'Brien?

  And and you mean shocked and kind of like to be frightened? Will they be frightened?

• 21:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, because, you know, my parents, they're like, they weren't that much that often in foreign countries. So just it's just Turkey or maybe um um Russia. So for them to see a foreign person is also a big thing. So to see you.

• 22:13Conan O'Brien?

  To be a foreign person would be one thing, but then when this giant this giant clown comes in with uh orange hair towering over them, that might be kind of a startling experience.

• 22:25Speaker 02

  But also, we don't talk loud, so loudly. And maybe that might also be a thing. Um, yeah, they might be surprised by you. Yeah.

• 22:34Speaker 01

  Oh, wow.

• 22:36Conan O'Brien?

  So did you think I was kind of loud when you talked to me?

• 22:41Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no, of course, no. I'm just saying that how my parents or my family would would would see is, yeah, they don't have that much experience, you know, communicating or talking to foreign people.

• 22:53Conan O'Brien?

  Maybe just remind me if I do meet your parents because I want to make a good impression that remind me beforehand and maybe I will just lower my voice a lot. Is that good?

• 23:03Speaker 02

  No, that's strange. That's weird. That's strange.

• 23:07Conan O'Brien?

  Hello, I'm a friend of Asia's and it's nice to meet you. My name is Conan. Is that creepy?

• 23:12Speaker 01

  That is kind of weird.

• 23:13Conan O'Brien?

  Why? Why is that creepy?

• 23:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:15Conan O'Brien?

  It just doesn't feel right coming out of your mouth somehow.

• 23:17Speaker 01

  Yeah. Do they know who he is? Do they know that like Conan's a famous entertainer and performer or?

• 23:25Speaker 02

  No, sadly, no.

• 23:29Conan O'Brien?

  Please, continue with your answer. Yes.

• 23:32Speaker 02

  No, they're just in Russian and in Kazakh television. They, yeah, they don't know about Conan. But I know, I know that they will be really amazed by your charm and then.

• 23:44Conan O'Brien?

  I never cracked that Russian Kazakhstani.

• 23:47Speaker 01

  I know.

• 23:48Conan O'Brien?

  Market. I never could and I have tried. I have tried.

• 23:51Speaker 01

  This could be a chance. Yeah, maybe when you're on a horse with an eagle, we can get the like local paparazzi there or like TV stations.

• 23:59Conan O'Brien?

  I would like to be featured. Do you have magazines that feature celebrities from Kazakhstan and, you know, neighboring countries? I'd like to be in one of those magazines, you know, frolicking on the beach.

• 24:14Speaker 02

  This, I don't know, but we have very like huge music festivals. So maybe you can be there and sing and dance and that would be.

• 24:21Conan O'Brien?

  I would think I would just come out with a guitar, but I'd have a, an eagle on my arm and I'd have the eagle attack the crowd and I'd never play one note on the guitar.

• 24:32Speaker 02

  That would be cool, really.

• 24:33Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah. I'd make everyone in the audience dress up as a rabbit before I came out. I see, this is one of the stranger interviews I've ever had. I think, I think it's your fault. I blame you. And I think this is all your fault because I was just minding my own business in Vienna. In Vienna, mind you, where I think I'm going to meet Austrians. When someone from Kazakhstan walks up to me, you know, munching on a chicken sandwich. And, and now look at us. Here we are talking. It's very cool. This is the part of my job that I love. I like to meet people from distant lands and create these connections. And I think we're friends now. Are we not friends?

• 25:14Speaker 02

  Oh, yes, we are. So, yeah, I couldn't stop, like, really, when I, when I saw you, I couldn't stop. I was really amazed to see you in Vienna, just in, yeah. And, yeah, I was very happy again to see you.

• 25:27Conan O'Brien?

  Well, it was very nice.

• 25:28Speaker 02

  I have one question, actually.

• 25:29Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, yeah, go ahead. Ask me a question.

• 25:32Speaker 02

  So, I'm a book lover. I love books. I love reading. Do you have any book advice, maybe? Or what you've been reading lately?

• 25:42Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I just read this massive 1,200-page biography of Mark Twain, the American humorist. It's not a beach read, unless you want to use the book to shield you from the sun. I loved it. I actually thought it was fantastic. But what kind of books do you like? You have to give me, what kind of thing you're interested? Do you like true crime? Do you like history?

• 26:04Speaker 01

  Sexy books.

• 26:04Conan O'Brien?

  Do you like?

• 26:06Speaker 01

  Sexy books. Sexy books.

• 26:08Conan O'Brien?

  You mean like Playboy?

• 26:09Speaker 01

  Like, like fanfic and, you know, like, uh, Fabio cover books.

• 26:14Conan O'Brien?

  I see. Do you like a sexy book?

• 26:17Speaker 02

  No, I've never read them, though.

• 26:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, thank you. I'm sorry.

• 26:21Speaker 01

  Alone on my island.

• 26:22Speaker 03

  Do you like sexy? You read Fabio books?

• 26:25Speaker 01

  Of course, I love the sexy books.

• 26:26Speaker 03

  What, Fabio books?

• 26:27Speaker 01

  No, like, you know, like, supermarket smut.

• 26:30Speaker 03

  Like a Fifty Shades of Grey kind of thing?

• 26:32Speaker 01

  Yes, yes.

• 26:33Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 26:33Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 26:33Conan O'Brien?

  She like, I'm sorry, Sona broke in with her own predilections. And said that she likes sexy books. That was not me. I like history books where sometimes sexy things happen.

• 26:46Speaker 03

  Uh, never.

• 26:49Conan O'Brien?

  Beg to differ, sir. I beg to differ. Some crazy stuff went down at Fort Sumter before the firing began. But anyway, give me a clue as to what kind of book you like.

• 27:01Speaker 02

  I'm into Russian literature, so into Russian classics.

• 27:05Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, guess what?

• 27:05Speaker 02

  Boring.

• 27:06Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, no, not boring at all. I just read Brothers Karamazov.

• 27:11Speaker 02

  Oh, Dostoevsky, nice.

• 27:12Conan O'Brien?

  I went on a Dostoevsky jag and I just, I read, I finished Brothers Karamazov a couple of weeks ago and I, I loved it. There are parts that are a bit of a slog because it's Dostoevsky and he had a lot of time on his hands and a lot of ink. But I, um, I really liked it and I liked Crime and Punishment a lot. So, do you like that?

• 27:30Speaker 02

  Yeah. I, I love it, I love it, yeah. Have you read The Idiot? I idiot?

• 27:36Conan O'Brien?

  That's my life story.

• 27:39Conan O'Brien?

  Read it, I'm living it. What are you talking about? Hey, Conan, have you read The Idiot?

• 27:43Speaker 02

  There's also...

• 27:44Conan O'Brien?

  Duh!

• 27:44Speaker 02

  No, no, no, there's also Dostoevsky novel.

• 27:46Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, I know, I know, I know The Idiot is a Dostoevsky novel, yes, and I have read it and I'm, I just, I love Russian literature. I think it's fascinating. I really do. I also love Russian history. Right now, I'm, uh, doing a deep dive on Peter the Great and, uh, how he, uh, defeated Sweden. And, uh, yeah. See?

• 28:08Speaker 02

  I think, I just, I think count myself very lucky because I can speak Russian and...

• 28:13Conan O'Brien?

  See? I read things.

• 28:15Speaker 02

  Reading Russian.

• 28:16Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, anyway, I, yes, I would keep reading about Russia. This, such a fascinating history, Russia. Fascinating people with a fascinating history. And so, I, I...

• 28:26Speaker 02

  That's true.

• 28:27Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, um, you know, read Lenin...

• 28:29Speaker 02

  Can I just count myself?

• 28:31Conan O'Brien?

  Pardon me?

• 28:31Speaker 02

  Sorry.

• 28:32Conan O'Brien?

  Go ahead.

• 28:33Speaker 02

  No, I just, I just count myself very lucky that I know Russian and I can read in Russian. So to read Dostoevsky in Russian, it's really, um, it's a really, um, a thing that I can't even explain, like, how, how grateful I am actually to know Russian, to actually read them.

• 28:48Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 28:48Speaker 02

  And in their native language.

• 28:50Conan O'Brien?

  Also, the plays, The Seagull. I, I saw a production of The Seagull in, in New Haven not long ago and it was amazing. It was great. I mean, it all holds up. The Cherry Orchard, it's the classics. Read the plays as well.

• 29:04Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 29:05Conan O'Brien?

  I'm sorry, we lost Sona, who's waiting for the sexy part.

• 29:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:08Speaker 03

  Frankly, I am too.

• 29:09Conan O'Brien?

  The seagull, the seagull gets it on with another seagull.

• 29:12Speaker 01

  Alright.

• 29:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, there's a whole section where they get it on.

• 29:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:16Conan O'Brien?

  Um, Aseya, um, I, uh, I hope I get to visit you. It'll be really fun and, uh, I look forward to some of it. The drinking, small amounts of tea, horseback, um, eagle on my arm, maybe a leopard as well. Uh, and, um, you know, horse meat, we'll talk about it. Okay? I don't know if I'll use five fingers, I might use an ice cream scoop. Um, we'll talk about it, but, uh, clearly I'm babbling now and I'm being told by my producer that I'm out of control and it's time for me to take my medication. Um, but it's so nice to talk to you, Aseya, and thank you very much for coming up and saying hi to me in Vienna. I love, I love this kind of connection. It's really cool.

• 30:02Speaker 02

  Of course, yeah. Um, really, I'm so happy to see you again and talk to you again and also you, Sona, and you, I, I don't remember your name, sorry.

• 30:12Conan O'Brien?

  I have trouble too. My name's Fabio. His name's Fabio.

• 30:15Speaker 02

  Um, I'm sorry.

• 30:16Conan O'Brien?

  No, it's Matt, it's Matt.

• 30:17Speaker 01

  It's Matt, it's okay.

• 30:19Conan O'Brien?

  It's okay, there's too many of us to know. There's a lot of people in here.

• 30:22Speaker 03

  I often forget my own name.

• 30:23Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, yes.

• 30:24Speaker 03

  It's okay.

• 30:24Conan O'Brien?

  He's, uh, late stages of dementia. Um, well, it was nice to talk to you and, um, I wish you well and thank you for being such a cool person.

• 30:35Speaker 02

  Thank you, Conan. Okay, thank you.

• 30:37Conan O'Brien?

  Bye bye.

• 30:37Speaker 03

  Bye.

• 30:38Speaker 02

  Bye.

• 31:27Speaker 03

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• 31:58Conan O'Brien?

  When you hear Alka Seltzer, you probably think heartburn, right?

• 32:00Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 32:01Conan O'Brien?

  Well, did you know Alka Seltzer has a line of cold and flu medications known as Alka Seltzer Cold?

• 32:07Speaker 04

  Ooh.

• 32:08Conan O'Brien?

  Did you know that, David?

• 32:08Speaker 04

  No, but I feel like we need it.

• 32:09Conan O'Brien?

  Why didn't you know that, David?

• 32:11Speaker 04

  I know, you expect me to know everything.

• 32:13Conan O'Brien?

  I knew this because I've...

• 32:14Speaker 04

  Did you?

• 32:14Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I've tried it, it's really good. And I like that fizzy, fizzy, fizzy when you drop the Alka Seltzer Cold into the water.

• 32:20Speaker 04

  You do, yeah.

• 32:21Conan O'Brien?

  Alka Seltzer Cold, fast dissolves tablets are designed to deliver cold and flu relief, fast! Just drop the two tablets in water and hear those bubbles bursting into action. Ready to work faster than pills. Bubbles faster than pills. Pills take time to dissolve, not bubbles. Next time a cold or flu strikes, quick! Alka Seltzer Cold, nothing works faster for cold and flu symptom relief. Among oral products, use as directed.