#2380 - Jordan Jensen

Jordan Jensen is a comedian, actress, and podcaster. She is the co-host of the podcast "Bein' Ian with Jordan" with comedian Ian Fidance, and host of her own podcast, "RIP Jordan Jensen." Her new comedy special, "Jordan Jensen: Take Me With You," is streaming exclusively on Netflix. Look for her in Bradley Cooper's film, "Is This Thing On?," in theaters December 19, 2025. www.netflix.com/title/81978275 www.youtube.com/@jordanjensenlolstopwww.jordanjensencomedy.com Don’t miss out on all the action - Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up at https://dkng.co/rogan or with my promo code ROGAN. GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit ccpg.org (CT), or visit www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new DraftKings customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Get 1 promo code to redeem discounted NFL Sunday Ticket subscription and max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos. NFL Sunday Ticket: YouTube TV base plan (not included in this offer) required to watch Sunday Ticket on YouTube TV. Subscription autorenews yearly at then-current price (currently $378 for YouTube TV subscribers, or $480 for YouTube subscribers); cancel anytime. Terms, restrictions, embargoes and eligibility requirements apply. No refunds. Commercial use excluded. Addt’l terms: https://tv.youtube.com/learn/nflsundayticket/draftkings/. Offer ends 9/29/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  The Joe Rogan Experience.

• 0:14Speaker 01

  Hello.

• 0:14Joe Rogan?

  What's up?

• 0:15Speaker 01

  Oh, good. I got my legal pad here.

• 0:17Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, in case you need to write notes.

• 0:19Speaker 01

  I'm gonna take notes on what you're doing right and wrong. And I'll give them to you at the end.

• 0:24Joe Rogan?

  Tell me.

• 0:25Speaker 01

  Okay, I will.

• 0:26Joe Rogan?

  So I can figure out what the wrong stuff is to stop doing it.

• 0:29Speaker 01

  I wanna fuck with all this stuff.

• 0:31Joe Rogan?

  I know, there's so much shit.

• 0:32Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 0:32Joe Rogan?

  And people keep giving me new shit.

• 0:34Speaker 01

  I know. I brought a little tiny figurine of a little thing onstage one time, and every single meet and greet, people give me these little tiny animals. So now I have this giant collection of them. And I'm like, I don't like these that much.

• 0:45Joe Rogan?

  That's the problem is like, everybody knows that I keep a bunch of shit on this desk. So people give me shit to put on this desk. And now it's getting kind of crazy, like where I'm gonna have to have a shelf.

• 0:56Speaker 01

  I had to get a shelf. I got one of those old typewriter keyboard things.

• 1:00Joe Rogan?

  Look, I have like mammoth teeth. This is a piece of art.

• 1:04Speaker 01

  Oh, somebody gave me one of these.

• 1:05Joe Rogan?

  Cut out of a woolly mammoth tooth. Oh, that's a, don't blow it.

• 1:08Speaker 01

  I won't. I got one of these. A Mayan death whistle?

• 1:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, Aztec death whistle. Brian Callen blew one right before COVID hit. I'm not saying he caused it.

• 1:18Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:20Joe Rogan?

  But there's a lot of videos saying he caused it.

• 1:23Speaker 01

  I get it. I get it. That would be a death whistle.

• 1:26Joe Rogan?

  I think it was technically, I think when he blew it, it had already like caught on in China.

• 1:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:32Joe Rogan?

  Unless we're in a simulation.

• 1:34Speaker 01

  Right. You're the COVID guy. I was listening to your podcast with, um, what's the woman who got falsely accused?

• 1:41Joe Rogan?

  Of what?

• 1:43Speaker 01

  Of murdering her roommate?

• 1:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 1:46Speaker 01

  I was listening to that one, and I like fast forwarded it one moment. And it went from her being like, and then I was in prison for four years, to you being like, well, the bat's in COVID. And I was like, how did we get here?

• 1:58Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that was a fascinating podcast. Amanda Knox, she's got a Netflix series out right now where someone plays her, which has got to be super fucking weird.

• 2:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:07Joe Rogan?

  Like, someone else plays her in like a dramatization of her getting wrongly accused at 20 years old of a murder. Where they had all this evidence that this guy who broke into the house fucking murdered her. His like, his DNA was there, and they ignored it because they didn't want to admit that they were wrong. It's on Hulu. Hulu, sorry.

• 2:26Speaker 01

  I don't really get how that happens.

• 2:29Joe Rogan?

  Because cops are cunts.

• 2:30Speaker 01

  Right, but did they not check, did they not see sperm everywhere? Oh, no, the guy was like, "I fucked her."

• 2:35Joe Rogan?

  No, I don't know what he said, I don't know what happened, but I know that they started, they had a narrative.

• 2:42Speaker 01

  Oh, that he was in on it?

• 2:43Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no. They had a nar- well, they had a narrative that she did it, that she caused the murder.

• 2:48Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:49Joe Rogan?

  And the guy started with that, and he stuck with it. And even when there was evidence that showed that it was, there was a guy in there, and then the guy did it, and then the window was broken, and somebody broke into the house, and like...

• 2:58Speaker 01

  And then eventually, he came forward and was like, "This has nothing to do with her," the guy who did do it.

• 3:03Joe Rogan?

  Well, I don't think he eventually ever did anything. No, like, she actually had a meeting with him, which is crazy, like, after the fact, like, forgave him. But...

• 3:13Speaker 01

  She's a white girl, they're all about the forgiveness.

• 3:16Joe Rogan?

  Twice.

• 3:17Speaker 01

  I know, the Supreme Court?

• 3:18Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, she went, she got acquitted, like, she got released, right? And then they retried her in absentia, so she was in America while they were trying her in Italy again.

• 3:30Speaker 01

  And then they said she's fine?

• 3:31Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, which is fucking crazy, like, hey, how about give her some fucking money?

• 3:35Speaker 01

  Also, the guy, Raffaela, was in solitary for six months.

• 3:39Joe Rogan?

  I know.

• 3:40Speaker 01

  I can't fathom that.

• 3:42Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:42Speaker 01

  The six months in solitude is so crazy to me. One day in solitude, and I'm done.

• 3:47Joe Rogan?

  Well, I talked to a guy, uh, that had been in solitary for years.

• 3:52Speaker 01

  What does that mean? Like, you get, you shit and piss in there?

• 3:55Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:56Speaker 01

  What?

• 3:57Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you get no contact.

• 3:59Speaker 01

  You must be scrambly after that.

• 4:01Joe Rogan?

  Hundred percent.

• 4:03Speaker 01

  I feel like they, yeah, it's gotta do some sort of weird brain damage thing where they come out.

• 4:08Joe Rogan?

  Well, this guy Shaka that we had on the podcast, he's great.

• 4:10Speaker 01

  Was he normal?

• 4:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, beyond, like, super smart. He wrote in there, educated himself in there, too.

• 4:16Speaker 01

  Oh, you can read in there?

• 4:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you can read. Yeah, I mean, they don't just give you nothing, but you do go crazy. You go crazy. Human beings need human contact.

• 4:26Speaker 01

  Well, it's like when you don't do anything all day and then you get right up on stage. Have you ever done that? Where you don't talk to anybody and you feel insane?

• 4:33Joe Rogan?

  It's the worst. The first conversation of the day on stage. Yeah, that's why I always bring friends on the road. You don't want to be like that weirdo in the hotel room by yourself.

• 4:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, and then you take a nap and the sun goes down while you're napping. That's the worst feeling. That, when I do that, it feels like I'm haunting the audience. Like, I'm like, you guys are in a different reality and I'm, I'm intruding on where you're at.

• 4:55Joe Rogan?

  The weird one is when you wake up and you don't know what city you're in.

• 4:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, but that's why I got the dog. I was so sick of that feeling. I was so sick of waking up and being like, I've been abducted, where am I? This place is nicer than my apartment, so that's good. But where am I? And then I saw my dog and I was like, oh, we're all right.

• 5:10Joe Rogan?

  That's not the only reason why you got your dog.

• 5:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, and she rolls. Yeah, and she's awesome.

• 5:15Joe Rogan?

  She's really sweet.

• 5:16Speaker 01

  She's very cool.

• 5:16Joe Rogan?

  She's so cute. How long have you had her?

• 5:18Speaker 01

  Two years.

• 5:19Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's awesome.

• 5:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 5:20Joe Rogan?

  Was she full grown when you got her?

• 5:21Speaker 01

  Tiny. Because I wanted to adopt the mom.

• 5:24Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 5:25Speaker 01

  But they were like, hey, the mom just had all this, we didn't know she was pregnant, she's had a litter of puppies, will you take one of these?

• 5:30Joe Rogan?

  Hmm.

• 5:31Speaker 01

  And I was like, okay. And I had no idea how hard it is to have a puppy.

• 5:34Joe Rogan?

  I've had dogs where you adopt them full grown and it was great. I had this dog named Lucy, she was awesome. She was so sweet. And then I had another dog named Squeaky Fromm that was a real nightmare.

• 5:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 5:45Joe Rogan?

  She was real, maybe it was because I named her Squeaky Fromm after one of the Manson family members.

• 5:49Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, that'll happen.

• 5:50Joe Rogan?

  She has squeaky voice. She, like, she'd been barking so much in the pound that when I got her out of the pound, like, her voice was like,

• 5:59Joe Rogan?

  And then eventually it got normal again because she didn't have to bark 24 hours a day. She just had worn out. She had worn out vocal cords. She had a totally normal bark, but I was like, oh my God, her bark is like a squeak.

• 6:09Speaker 01

  She was a smoker, yeah.

• 6:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it was like that.

• 6:11Speaker 01

  That's awesome.

• 6:12Joe Rogan?

  Like she was hoarse.

• 6:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, you don't know what you're gonna get. I mean, when I got a rescue, I was like, I'm gonna get a small rescue, so I hope it'll be fine, but it was such a gamble. Everybody was like, do not do this.

• 6:22Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, we had a Doberman once that was a rescue that we had to get rid of. He had distemper and he got really crazy, like in that, like growling at us and barking at us out of nowhere. And I was a little kid.

• 6:32Speaker 01

  Oh, you're really good.

• 6:33Joe Rogan?

  Yo, we got rid of him.

• 6:36Speaker 01

  We had a dog that would, that ate the foot off of my, we had a pit bull that was a rescue and my mom had this like woman move in with us who she was dating and her kids moved in too. And my pit bull ate the foot off of the wife's cat.

• 6:52Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my God.

• 6:53Speaker 01

  Of the woman's cat.

• 6:54Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my God.

• 6:55Speaker 01

  And the woman was like, hey, you gotta like choose between me or this pit bull. My mom was like, yeah, get your cripple cat out of here. And we kept, we kept our dog. She didn't give a fuck, dude. She was so attached to that dog. That dog, the amount of times would just like kill. My friend was in the backyard, the dog kills a cat and my friend's freaking out. She's like, we have to find the owner. And my mom was like, you will stay quiet. It was crazy. It was nuts. She was obsessed with that dog. That's the only time I've seen her like really cry is when a dog dies.

• 7:26Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's hard. They don't live long enough.

• 7:29Speaker 01

  I can't even think about it.

• 7:30Joe Rogan?

  They're your best friends.

• 7:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:32Joe Rogan?

  I'm ter, I have a dog named Marshall. He's a golden retriever. He's the best and he's nine now. He'll be nine in a couple of months. And it's just like, oh no. I've had him since he was a baby. Now he's nine. I'm like, he's only got a few years left and he's so active. He's super healthy, eats great, he's fit, he's not.

• 7:51Speaker 01

  Retriever?

• 7:51Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 7:52Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 7:53Joe Rogan?

  But.

• 7:53Speaker 01

  The small dogs live forever.

• 7:54Joe Rogan?

  They get to be like 12 and that's kinda it. 13, maybe 14 and then they're really hurting.

• 8:01Speaker 01

  It's fucked.

• 8:02Joe Rogan?

  It's fucked. Apparently there's a drug that they've developed for, for dogs, like a longevity drug. I don't know if they've released it yet, but I know that it shows promise and it extends dogs' lifetime.

• 8:15Speaker 01

  Whitney Cummings the other day said that her friend, her friend's like soul dog died the other day and she said, "When the dog dies, you like learn something about yourself that's very important." So I've been holding on to that kind of woo-woo thing. Like she's like, "You kind of show up for yourself in a way you need to."

• 8:32Joe Rogan?

  I don't know if I'd listen to Whitney.

• 8:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, she does.

• 8:34Joe Rogan?

  Whitney gets a little woo-woo with her dog.

• 8:36Speaker 01

  I like how Whitney has something to say about everything, though.

• 8:40Joe Rogan?

  Rapamycin.

• 8:42Speaker 01

  Wrap him on ice. Take him off.

• 8:45Joe Rogan?

  I've heard of rapamycin before because rapamycin is something that Peter Attia is a big proponent of for longevity.

• 8:53Speaker 01

  The guy who wants to live forever?

• 8:55Joe Rogan?

  No, no, that's Brian Johnson. Another study at Texas A&M University showed rapamycin could extend the lifespan of older dogs by up to 20%. Generally well tolerated, however, can cause side effects such as lethargy, lack of appetite. Oh, boy.

• 9:11Speaker 01

  No, you can't do it.

• 9:12Joe Rogan?

  Interesting. Is that it? Because I think there was something else. It was like a gene therapy.

• 9:21Joe Rogan?

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• 12:19Speaker 01

  What happened to the cloning thing? What happened to CRISPR?

• 12:22Joe Rogan?

  They probably already made clones.

• 12:23Speaker 01

  But why did we not hear about that? Weren't they cloning sheep and shit?

• 12:26Joe Rogan?

  Yep.

• 12:27Speaker 01

  And then we just stopped hearing about it?

• 12:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they probably made a bunch of people already.

• 12:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, what is that?

• 12:30Joe Rogan?

  The people telling you about clones are probably clones.

• 12:32Speaker 01

  You ever see a person that looks exactly like another person and then you ask them their name and it's the same name? And you're like, "No fucking way."

• 12:38Joe Rogan?

  You know the story about those two baseball players?

• 12:40Speaker 01

  No.

• 12:40Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it's the nuttiest shit of all time. These two baseball players look exactly the same, have the exact same name-

• 12:47Speaker 01

  No way.

• 12:48Joe Rogan?

  And never met each other, and they both play baseball.

• 12:50Speaker 01

  Let me see them.

• 12:51Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it's bananas, these two guys.

• 12:53Speaker 01

  Oh my god!

• 12:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, like, what? What in the fuck?

• 12:56Speaker 04

  Different parents.

• 12:57Speaker 01

  Why are they wearing the same glasses?

• 12:59Joe Rogan?

  And their name is Brady Feigl, right? So it's not even like a normal name.

• 13:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, and they both got the same injury, that's how they found out. They were going to the same doctor.

• 13:06Joe Rogan?

  Just imagine, your name is Brady Feigl and you meet another guy who's also Brady Feigl. You're both six foot four, you both have red hair-

• 13:15Speaker 01

  They're both really tall!

• 13:16Joe Rogan?

  You both have black glasses, you both have the fucking same crazy name! That name is nuts!

• 13:22Speaker 01

  Maryland and Missouri is not far enough away.

• 13:24Joe Rogan?

  That's crazy!

• 13:25Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 13:26Speaker 04

  I think they also, once they found this out, they didn't immediately go meet each other. They waited for like, two or three years maybe, I think.

• 13:32Joe Rogan?

  Oh, if the guy played baseball and I played baseball, I'd be like, "Bro, we gotta hang out and freak people out."

• 13:38Speaker 04

  They're different ages, I thought they were the same age.

• 13:40Joe Rogan?

  Oh, how old? Thirty-two and twenty-seven?

• 13:41Speaker 04

  Yes, they're slightly-

• 13:42Joe Rogan?

  Interesting, the first guy must be really pissed. "This motherfucker's stealing my shine."

• 13:47Speaker 01

  That's bizarre. Yeah, but I just remember hearing so much about cloning-

• 13:50Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 13:51Speaker 01

  And then it just stopped.

• 13:52Joe Rogan?

  Well, they do it with dogs. They do it with people's pets. Like, if you wanna get your pet cloned, you can get your pet cloned. That's a real thing now.

• 13:58Speaker 01

  But what do you do?

• 13:59Joe Rogan?

  I think it costs thirty thousand dollars.

• 14:02Speaker 01

  But then, they're cloned at the same age?

• 14:04Joe Rogan?

  It's- no, no, no, no, no, no, no, they're a puppy.

• 14:07Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 14:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 14:08Speaker 01

  See, we could do that?

• 14:09Joe Rogan?

  You get to start from scratch. Yeah, otherwise you'd have like, an eleven-year-old, you keep like, bringing back-

• 14:13Speaker 01

  That'd be so mean, that'd be so mean.

• 14:16Joe Rogan?

  He's got arthritis and diarrhea.

• 14:18Speaker 01

  He's like, "Please let me die, for the love of god."

• 14:22Joe Rogan?

  You waited too long to clone him?

• 14:24Speaker 01

  That's- dude, bring it back as a puppy, though, we could do that.

• 14:27Joe Rogan?

  Did you see that movie with Demi Moore called The Substance?

• 14:30Speaker 01

  Okay, I fainted in the theater.

• 14:32Joe Rogan?

  Bro.

• 14:33Speaker 01

  It's so hard.

• 14:34Joe Rogan?

  Bro, that movie is nuts.

• 14:37Speaker 01

  It's nuts. I'm actually very pro that movie. Like, I love the narrative.

• 14:42Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it was great.

• 14:43Speaker 01

  I love the idea of that when you get all that face shit, you're just keeping an old person alive.

• 14:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 14:47Speaker 01

  I've tried to describe that on stage so much where I'm like, doesn't it bother you that when people are like, you look good for your age? You're just like, hide it, like you're concealing your death layer? You know what I mean?

• 14:57Joe Rogan?

  Right, right, right.

• 14:58Speaker 01

  And that movie portrayed that perfectly, where it's just a fucking...

• 15:01Joe Rogan?

  It's kind of ironic that Demi Moore, who looks insanely good at 62,

• 15:06Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 15:06Joe Rogan?

  played that lady.

• 15:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 15:08Joe Rogan?

  You know, cause like...

• 15:09Speaker 01

  But I liked that because it showed like, even when you saw her weird old lady butt, you were like, that's Demise Moore's nice butt, but I'm still like in awe of the young girl's butt, which is unacceptable.

• 15:21Joe Rogan?

  It's unacceptable.

• 15:22Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? Like, when she was doing the whole dance and you're like, why is this so intense? And you're like, cause it's a young person.

• 15:28Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 15:28Speaker 01

  I think that, did that director do, no, that director didn't do Raw. But it was a female director.

• 15:34Joe Rogan?

  I don't know what else this director did, but that movie was awesome.

• 15:38Speaker 01

  I hit the deck, though. I tried, I faint so easily.

• 15:40Joe Rogan?

  Do you really?

• 15:41Speaker 01

  Dude, I just, blood and stuff, I faint, and I muscled through the gory part and I was like, I'm fucking good. Like, I can't, I've cured it, and then the music, it's like when a, when a movie starts going like, ah, ah, ah, like that? Like, like on both sides?

• 15:54Joe Rogan?

  That gets you.

• 15:55Speaker 01

  I'm like a goat, dude. I, I got to the bathroom and I passed out. I'm in New York just on the ground, fainted, people are walking over my body, they're like, homeless person.

• 16:03Joe Rogan?

  That's hilarious.

• 16:04Speaker 01

  I was fucked.

• 16:05Joe Rogan?

  That's so funny. I used to date a girl that when, if someone got a needle on the screen, she'd faint.

• 16:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 16:11Joe Rogan?

  Just like, didn't matter where she was, if someone got injected, I would, ooh.

• 16:14Speaker 01

  It's so bad.

• 16:16Joe Rogan?

  Her dad had it, too.

• 16:17Speaker 01

  My dad has it, yeah.

• 16:18Joe Rogan?

  And her dad was a dentist, which is crazy, like...

• 16:21Speaker 01

  The dentist makes me faint.

• 16:22Joe Rogan?

  When the, when the kid, one of their, her brother, got like crazy sunburn, like really bad, where he got blisters, the dad saw it and just fucking fainted.

• 16:32Speaker 01

  Dude, it's crazy. My sister called my dad once and she was working on cadavers, and she was like, I'm so interested in this, we cut into a cadaver today, and she just heard thump on the other line, and she was like, dad, dad.

• 16:43Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my god.

• 16:44Speaker 01

  He was done, dude. He's fainted so many times, yeah.

• 16:48Joe Rogan?

  From a phone call?

• 16:49Speaker 01

  From a phone call.

• 16:50Joe Rogan?

  That's so wild.

• 16:51Speaker 01

  He couldn't be in our births or anything.

• 16:53Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my god, that's crazy.

• 16:56Joe Rogan?

  That's cr- what is that?

• 16:58Speaker 01

  It's called vasovagal.

• 17:00Joe Rogan?

  Okay, but is that a psychological thing? Because it's obviously like your reaction to a thing.

• 17:06Speaker 01

  I-

• 17:06Joe Rogan?

  Like, I wonder if you can temper that somehow?

• 17:09Speaker 01

  Here's the problem with it is why I don't- I used to think it was psychological, like me and my dad pictured things too well. Like, we pictured it, the needle going in. But vasovagal, like, sometimes I'll be putting an earring in.

• 17:20Joe Rogan?

  You just faint?

• 17:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, like-

• 17:21Joe Rogan?

  You should wear a helmet everywhere so you don't bounce your head off the fucking linoleum.

• 17:25Speaker 01

  It's so fucked up.

• 17:26Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god.

• 17:28Speaker 01

  Neurological.

• 17:29Joe Rogan?

  Well, I bet, but also triggered by high states of anxiety, right?

• 17:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 17:34Joe Rogan?

  So that's what you would be able to control. You wouldn't be able to control the fact that you do faint when you have a high level of anxiety. So, uh, vasovagal response, sudden overreaction of the body's autonomic nervous system to a trigger such as pain or emotional stress, uh, or music that causes a temporary drop in heart rate and blood pressure.

• 17:55Speaker 01

  There's a whole part of my special where I talk about me and this guy who was also a fainter having sex.

• 18:01Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god.

• 18:02Speaker 01

  And-

• 18:03Joe Rogan?

  You both fainted?

• 18:03Speaker 01

  A lot.

• 18:04Joe Rogan?

  Nice.

• 18:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:05Joe Rogan?

  It's hot.

• 18:05Speaker 01

  Yeah. It was rough. It was rough. Because when you faint, it comes with sweating and seeing white, like, it's brutal.

• 18:13Joe Rogan?

  And you probably hope the man doesn't faint, like, he can keep it together.

• 18:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:17Joe Rogan?

  That would be like a nice thing.

• 18:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 18:18Joe Rogan?

  Right?

• 18:19Speaker 01

  No, he fainted. He could faint on command, he could think his own thing.

• 18:21Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's hilarious.

• 18:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:23Joe Rogan?

  That's hilarious. I wonder what would happen if a guy like that had got drafted in Vietnam?

• 18:28Speaker 01

  Done. Faint, that would have gotten-

• 18:30Joe Rogan?

  Faint shot.

• 18:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:31Joe Rogan?

  Bye-bye, that's it?

• 18:32Speaker 01

  Yeah. My dad had a heart attack once and fainted.

• 18:39Speaker 01

  And I saw him in the hospital, I was like, "What happened? A heart attack fucked up your face?" And he was like, "I fainted on a fence." And I was like, "That's crazy."

• 18:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god.

• 18:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, he fainted so much. And he was a contractor, so he would always have cuts and stuff and be like, "No." And be out, it was crazy.

• 18:52Joe Rogan?

  That's nuts.

• 18:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, he jigsawed through his nose one time. Yeah.

• 18:57Joe Rogan?

  Cause he fainted?

• 18:58Speaker 01

  No, but then he fainted. He like pulled the cord and then it cut through his nose and then he faints. It's crazy.

• 19:04Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god. Oh my god. I would wear a helmet everywhere if I was that dude.

• 19:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:09Joe Rogan?

  I just wear a football helmet, just like I'm a fan.

• 19:11Speaker 01

  That's what we have to worry about all the time. Like if I cut myself, it's not about the cut, like the stitches or not, it's that I'm about to hit the deck. It's crazy. It's so fucked up.

• 19:20Joe Rogan?

  Have you ever fainted right before you went on stage? Cause I would think that's like a heightened state of anxiety a little bit, especially in the early days.

• 19:27Speaker 01

  I've panicked. Well, another problem is I get, when I panic when I have really bad intrusive thoughts. Like I was around a famous person recently and I was convinced I was gonna bite, bite her. And I started getting a full panic, which makes you wanna faint. But it's a, it's a, it's a different thing, but both lead to fainting.

• 19:46Joe Rogan?

  I knew a dude who was a warm-up guy, you know, he'd just do warm-up. And he had a real problem with anxiety. He just would freak out and he was a comic and just, it never worked out for him because his anxiety would just overwhelm him.

• 19:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:57Joe Rogan?

  And one time, he was warming up for the Cosby Show and he got this idea in his head that he was gonna say the N-word.

• 20:05Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 20:06Joe Rogan?

  And he's like, "Don't say it."

• 20:07Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 20:08Joe Rogan?

  "Don't say it."

• 20:09Speaker 01

  Oh, the Cosby Show.

• 20:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. So he's warming up for the Cosby Show. So he's, you know, basically in the crowd, warming up. Okay, so here in the next scene, Dr. Huxtable's gonna come in and all his mind is telling him is, "Don't say the N-word."

• 20:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:23Joe Rogan?

  He was not gonna say it. He was never gonna say it, but for whatever reason, he was overwhelmed by this fear of saying the N-word in this like very,

• 20:31Speaker 01

  It's so real.

• 20:31Joe Rogan?

  predominantly black audience. And he completely had a meltdown while he was doing warm-up.

• 20:35Speaker 01

  Where he was panicking.

• 20:37Joe Rogan?

  Full panic attack.

• 20:37Speaker 01

  With my special taping, I thought I was gonna hit somebody with a stool. Mine is violence. I think I'm going to bite. I think I'm gonna, yeah, totally. Or on airplanes, I'm worried I'm gonna pull the exit thing off. All the time. Mine is very violent. Or the person next to me, I'm gonna bite down on.

• 20:53Joe Rogan?

  That's probably a better response than like shrieking and

• 20:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:57Joe Rogan?

  falling to the ground.

• 20:58Speaker 01

  I know, but that, I was, the, the famous woman, I was like, I don't wanna be the biter.

• 21:03Joe Rogan?

  But you wouldn't bite her.

• 21:05Speaker 01

  I know, but I thought, but I had so long to obsess about it.

• 21:08Joe Rogan?

  Can you tell me who it is?

• 21:09Speaker 01

  It was Laura Dern.

• 21:11Joe Rogan?

  Really? You thought you were gonna bite Laura Dern? Wasn't she an admiral in Star Wars?

• 21:15Speaker 01

  I love her so much. But she was being so nice to me and we were sitting next to each other for so long and I was like, what if I just bit Laura Dern? And my brain was like, you're not. And I was like, but this might be the time that you do the thing. One time I was on a chairlift and I was like, what if you jumped off? And I obsessed so long that I just jumped off. I was fine. I landed and was fine. But I still was like, I did the thing.

• 21:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no.

• 21:37Speaker 01

  So since then, I've been like,

• 21:38Joe Rogan?

  How far was the jump?

• 21:39Speaker 01

  Not far.

• 21:40Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 21:40Speaker 01

  That's the other thing I have to remember is I waited for the snow to come up and meet the chairlift way closer and then jump. So my, you wanna,

• 21:47Joe Rogan?

  Smart.

• 21:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you're not crazy.

• 21:49Speaker 01

  You're not crazy.

• 21:50Joe Rogan?

  Just like a little thrill.

• 21:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:51Joe Rogan?

  Just a little bitty thrill.

• 21:52Speaker 01

  Totally, like biting Laura Dern.

• 21:53Joe Rogan?

  Think about biting her.

• 21:54Speaker 01

  She was so nice. Her skin was so Hollywood, you know? And I was like, oh, I could really,

• 22:01Joe Rogan?

  Her skin was Hollywood?

• 22:02Speaker 01

  Just so pure, so nice.

• 22:04Joe Rogan?

  Interesting.

• 22:05Speaker 01

  I got bug bites all over.

• 22:06Joe Rogan?

  I accidentally sat next to Daryl Hannah once at Cantor's Deli in the 90s.

• 22:11Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 22:12Joe Rogan?

  And they were doing some fucking game. They were playing some game. Her and her friends were playing some game with like states. Like figure out like what, you know, what's the Keystone State, like that kind of shit?

• 22:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 22:23Joe Rogan?

  And I was helping her. But she was totally normal. Like it was, we never acknowledged that she's Daryl Hannah at Cantor's Deli.

• 22:29Speaker 01

  Playing a game?

• 22:30Joe Rogan?

  She was just like, super chill.

• 22:32Speaker 01

  That's so nice.

• 22:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Her and her friends were having a sandwich, just laughing and doing some game about states.

• 22:39Speaker 01

  They're normal as hell. Matt Damon was at The Cellar recently and I couldn't, I was so fucked up at how, I don't know how it was fucking me up so much. I do too many, I microdose too many mushrooms, but I was like, his arms and hands are so, Matt Damon's arms and hands. Like, I knew them so well and he was like gesticulating and I was like, I fucking know those frickin' arms. It was crazy. From movies. From movies, yeah, like just moving. It's weird to know somebody so well and never have spoken to them. It's disturbing.

• 23:06Joe Rogan?

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• 23:45Joe Rogan?

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• 24:18Speaker 03

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• 24:57Joe Rogan?

  I met Matt Damon in Italy at a restaurant where he was sitting underneath a photo of himself.

• 25:05Speaker 01

  That's weird.

• 25:06Joe Rogan?

  This, this-

• 25:07Speaker 01

  Did he choose to sit there?

• 25:09Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no. The restaurant owner had him there before. It was a nice table. And there's photos all over the wall of celebrities that had been there before. And so Matt Damon went and sat down at the table where the photo of this owner- You know, taking a picture with Matt Damon is.

• 25:25Speaker 01

  That's some meta shit. That's crazy. He seems really sweet.

• 25:29Joe Rogan?

  He's a very nice guy. Super normal guy. There's a lot of them that are like, super normal.

• 25:33Speaker 01

  The funniest story ever is-

• 25:35Joe Rogan?

  Hold this thing like I doubt fucking crazy people. There's always like a thing in your head. You're like, they gotta be out of their fucking mind.

• 25:41Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 25:42Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 25:43Speaker 01

  Um, what's the guy's, Peter Dinklage?

• 25:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 25:46Speaker 01

  Came into the cellar and, um, threw a chicken wing at my friend's chest, just like out of nowhere. Somebody introduced him, like Gillis or somebody, maybe it was Schultz was like, oh, this is so and so, he's a good comic. And he threw a chicken wing at him. And I was like, that's the most Peter Dinklage, like, just basically being a little Renaissance man throwing like, his size turkey leg is crazy. It's crazy. A little Renaissance man. Just being like, away, Jester. I was like, that's too on the nose. It's crazy.

• 26:19Joe Rogan?

  Problem is, I knew him first from Elf.

• 26:22Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 26:23Joe Rogan?

  You know, so even though he's the Game of Thrones guy, to me, he's always the angry writer from Elf.

• 26:28Speaker 01

  I know him from, um, the guy, uh, Four Weddings and a Funeral or Wedding, Wedding and a Funeral.

• 26:33Joe Rogan?

  I never saw that. I heard it was really good.

• 26:34Speaker 01

  Really good.

• 26:35Joe Rogan?

  I've heard it's really good. Never saw it.

• 26:37Speaker 01

  Crazy funny.

• 26:38Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. That guy's great. He's, he was so good in Game of Thrones. He was so good. That's a complicated role.

• 26:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:44Joe Rogan?

  Complicated. That fucking show was so good. The new one, I'm trying to get into it, but like every season is like five years apart from the last one. You have to figure out, who is, who is this lady?

• 26:54Speaker 01

  Game of Thrones one, I had to, I was like asking a thousand people. I was like, I don't understand which place is which. I had to like map it out. I was, I could not figure it out, but it's so good. It opened up with the brother and sister.

• 27:06Joe Rogan?

  Fucking.

• 27:06Speaker 01

  That was so sick. I was like, let's ride.

• 27:09Joe Rogan?

  The other brother.

• 27:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was crazy.

• 27:10Joe Rogan?

  Nuts.

• 27:11Speaker 01

  And the just full on rape?

• 27:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 27:13Speaker 01

  Of the Daenerys girl?

• 27:14Joe Rogan?

  They cut the fucking head off the king. You're like, no.

• 27:17Speaker 01

  Yeah. It was crazy. He's the best. He's the best.

• 27:19Joe Rogan?

  He's the king.

• 27:20Speaker 01

  They did a great job.

• 27:21Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that fucking show ruled. It was such a good show. Such, the season one was, I mean, I mean, not season one, the real Game of Thrones. The new ones like, yeah. It's good, but you know, you're always, you're Jay Leno after Johnny Carson.

• 27:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally. You get attached to the characters.

• 27:38Joe Rogan?

  There's a thing. You're just like, aww.

• 27:40Speaker 01

  I didn't, I don't remember the last season. Oh, the last season was weird where Cersei rules.

• 27:46Joe Rogan?

  I was in Croatia and there's the place where they, where King's Landing is.

• 27:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:52Joe Rogan?

  Like, that's where they filmed it.

• 27:53Speaker 01

  Oh, that's awesome.

• 27:54Joe Rogan?

  And they, they like sort of do tours where they show you, where they film certain scenes.

• 27:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:59Joe Rogan?

  And one of the scenes is when she was, shame, shame, when she's walking on, like they-

• 28:04Speaker 01

  The little cobblestone? That's pretty.

• 28:05Joe Rogan?

  That's right there, yeah. You can actually see it.

• 28:08Speaker 01

  That's really cool.

• 28:09Joe Rogan?

  It's pretty cool. Yeah, they filmed a lot of shit.

• 28:11Speaker 01

  We still do those shame things on Twitter. We do the shame, shame.

• 28:14Joe Rogan?

  Shame, shame.

• 28:15Speaker 01

  I just went through a horrible Twitter thing last night.

• 28:17Joe Rogan?

  Oh no.

• 28:17Speaker 01

  Dude, I got dragged.

• 28:20Joe Rogan?

  You can't read that stuff.

• 28:22Speaker 01

  I did, dude, it was a fan hit me up and goes, don't go on Twitter. And I went on Twitter and it was so, this crazy out of context thing, where I was like talking, I was on Stav's podcast and I was talking about how, I was talking about this guy who used the word, I'm not gonna say it, T R A, I don't know how to spell it, N N Y?

• 28:41Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 28:42Speaker 01

  He used that word. And I was being like, that word is so fucking antiquated that at this point to me, it, it sounds like somebody's just calling like a drag queen that. And everybody took it as me saying that trans people are in drag.

• 28:56Joe Rogan?

  Oh god.

• 28:56Speaker 01

  And it like, dude, it was just like, went at me. And like, the crazy thing is, I thought I was being woke on that podcast. I had like, friends of mine being like, fuck Dord- like, it was crazy.

• 29:08Joe Rogan?

  Friends of yours?

• 29:08Speaker 01

  Friend- I mean friendly people, like people I work with.

• 29:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, those people can go eat shit. Those pylon people, they can all go eat shit.

• 29:15Speaker 01

  But that was my like first big one. I've had one before, but that was like-

• 29:19Joe Rogan?

  Though, that kinda shit pushes people away from all the things you're trying to promote. Like, it does, it doesn't mean that people hate trans people if they say something like that. That's not what you're saying.

• 29:32Speaker 01

  I was saying the opposite. I was being like, this guy was such an asshole for using that word. Also, that word is so corny.

• 29:37Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 29:37Speaker 01

  That I feel like, at this point, it's not even reference to- To transgender people that it's like what we say for drag.

• 29:45Joe Rogan?

  Some people still use it.

• 29:46Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 29:47Joe Rogan?

  But it's, uh, that's not the point. The point is, it's like, what are you trying to do? You're not trying to hurt anybody's feelings. So shut the fuck up. Everybody's just looking for a reason to be offended. It's just trying to find anything that they can like, green light, go.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  And just pulling it out?

• 30:04Joe Rogan?

  No nuance. Yeah, of course.

• 30:06Speaker 01

  It's so crazy.

• 30:07Joe Rogan?

  Of course.

• 30:08Speaker 01

  It was so, and I'm just like reading all of them and I was like, this is so many people that are just like, this dumb bitch. One of them said, this is a fat retard talking to a skinny retard about me and stuff. And I was like, oh, well, that's actually really sweet. That's really nice.

• 30:21Joe Rogan?

  So sweet. You're skinny.

• 30:21Speaker 01

  I love being skinny.

• 30:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, this is just what's going on online and most of the people that are online are very upset. Oh, good.

• 30:28Speaker 01

  I don't have Twitter. I deleted it because I kept looking at my ex's tweets. And then I was like, I'm deleting this for sobriety, you know? And then I went on it the other day and I was like, this is a nightmare, dude. It was crazy. And I hit up those people who tweeted and I was like, hey, why wouldn't you just text me, man? Like, I care about you. You care about me. And this was totally out of context. If you'd just asked me about it, I would have showed you the whole clip, you know? And they were like, you're right. That was crazy.

• 30:53Joe Rogan?

  It's a mental illness factory.

• 30:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:55Joe Rogan?

  It's, Twitter is just a giant cunt farm.

• 30:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:58Joe Rogan?

  That's what it is. It's just, everybody just is growing cunty thoughts.

• 31:03Speaker 01

  I just didn't know. I just am not even in there.

• 31:06Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's not good. I know. I stay off it as much as humanly possible. I try to get on it in the morning, just see what everybody's upset about. See what's in the news, what the, like, a UFO got shot with a hellfire missile and they have footage today and Rep Luna. Yeah, they were talking about it in hearings today. There's a video of a-

• 31:24Speaker 01

  In hearings?

• 31:25Joe Rogan?

  Yes. There's a video of a UFO getting hit by a hellfire missile and the hellfire missile just blows apart and the UFO just keeps moving.

• 31:33Speaker 01

  What it, what was the UFO? What did it look like?

• 31:35Joe Rogan?

  It's like a dot on a screen that they always look. They look like shit.

• 31:39Speaker 01

  I saw something weird coming down from the moon the other day. Do not know what it was.

• 31:43Joe Rogan?

  Look at this. So watch this. So the, here's the UFO. There's the missile. Watch this happens.

• 31:52Joe Rogan?

  Does it, it just knocks it around and then the thing just gets right back on track.

• 31:58Joe Rogan?

  Which is bananas.

• 31:58Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 31:59Joe Rogan?

  Like, anything that gets hit by a Hellfire missile usually gets fucking obliterated. Especially something that's literally the size of the missile.

• 32:07Speaker 01

  It's cruisin'.

• 32:09Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's flyin'. I mean, not fast enough that it could duck a missile. So, which is kinda weird that it let itself get hit.

• 32:17Speaker 04

  It's hard to see even what happens.

• 32:18Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 32:19Speaker 04

  Like, what is that little?

• 32:20Joe Rogan?

  Right, it's animation.

• 32:21Speaker 04

  Where's that?

• 32:22Joe Rogan?

  It's fucking Pong. We're, we're looking at Pong, you know?

• 32:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 32:25Joe Rogan?

  It's like an old video game, really shitty video game. This, this is why I have the hardest time getting excited about any of this stuff. It's like, I don't know what I just saw. You're telling me I saw a Hellfire missile hit a UFO. It's like, you know, you, you're reading Morse code to me. I don't know.

• 32:41Speaker 01

  Well, AI has done that too, where now it's like, I can't even go on Instagram. It's not even fun anymore because I don't know what's real or not.

• 32:47Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, we get caught all the time.

• 32:49Speaker 01

  Really?

• 32:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, there's always something. There's always something that you think is real. Like, Tim Walz with the fuck Trump shirt on, dancing in the elevator. Jame is like, it's fake. I'm like, no, no, no, it's real.

• 32:58Speaker 01

  I always, I'm like, I'm just past the age bracket where I can't detect it. It's crazy.

• 33:03Joe Rogan?

  Well, no one can detect it anymore, because especially what looks like cellphone footage. Because cellphone footage is kind of shitty already, so they just make it kind of shitty and you don't know. You don't know what the fuck you're looking at.

• 33:14Speaker 01

  My mom liked the photo on Facebook that of a fake AI photo of me on the beach. Different tattoos with, with a man and she liked it. I'm like, Mom, what are you doing? Who do you think that guy is? You know that I'm single. She's like, you look beautiful in it. I'm like, it's not real. That's not my body. That's not the body you gave birth to.

• 33:31Joe Rogan?

  Boomers can't handle it.

• 33:33Speaker 01

  No.

• 33:33Joe Rogan?

  They're so removed from this technology that they're living in an alternative dimension.

• 33:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally. I don't know what she does on there.

• 33:39Joe Rogan?

  They get their news on TV and that's a wrap.

• 33:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:41Joe Rogan?

  Whatever the guy says in front of the camera.

• 33:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:44Joe Rogan?

  That's the truth.

• 33:45Speaker 01

  My mom is my news source, which is nice. I didn't know that Epstein drawing had come out.

• 33:49Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. What it so the drawing is a draw was that the same as the one that had been leaked before? Is it different?

• 33:56Speaker 04

  I'm pretty sure that leaked one was someone took the description, put it in AI.

• 34:00Joe Rogan?

  Oh, so this is the actual drawing?

• 34:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, and this one, they actually got the book and someone like leaked it.

• 34:06Speaker 01

  The drawing, I did think when I imagined it that it was gonna be like a well, I was imagining like

• 34:12Joe Rogan?

  Really good job.

• 34:12Speaker 01

  DiCaprio drawing a French girl, you know, and when I saw that one, I was like, God, Trump, at least make her hot. What are you doing? But what was the transcript he had written out? He had it like?

• 34:21Joe Rogan?

  This is it.

• 34:22Speaker 01

  What does voiceover mean?

• 34:23Speaker 04

  It's like a script.

• 34:24Joe Rogan?

  It says, uh, there must be more to life than having everything. Donald, yes, there is. So he wrote this?

• 34:30Speaker 04

  Supposedly.

• 34:31Joe Rogan?

  The voice, it says voiceover, like he's like a movie star, like he's in a script. Donald, yes, there is, but I won't tell you what it is. Jeffrey, nor will I, since I also know what it is. Who fucking talks like this? Donald, we have certain things in common, Jeffrey. Jeffrey, yes, we do. Come to think of it, Donald, enigmas never age. Have you noticed that? Jeffrey, as a matter of fact, it was clear to me the last time I saw you.

• 34:56Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 34:58Joe Rogan?

  A pal's a wonderful thing. Happy birthday. May every day be another wonderful secret.

• 35:04Speaker 01

  Ooh.

• 35:05Joe Rogan?

  And then I like how he's got the signature right where the bush is.

• 35:07Speaker 01

  Yeah. I don't think that he meant for that, though.

• 35:11Joe Rogan?

  Oh, come on.

• 35:11Speaker 01

  He made it sound like he meant for that.

• 35:13Joe Rogan?

  I think he did.

• 35:14Speaker 01

  I don't, I think he just signed it.

• 35:16Joe Rogan?

  Maybe.

• 35:16Speaker 01

  But I was imagining.

• 35:17Joe Rogan?

  But it's kind of ironic that it's right where the

• 35:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:19Joe Rogan?

  vagine is.

• 35:20Speaker 01

  But I don't think, I don't think Trump likes a hairy bush.

• 35:23Joe Rogan?

  That's a dude. Okay, that's a dude with womanly hips.

• 35:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:26Joe Rogan?

  Like, look at the boobs. They're weird.

• 35:28Speaker 04

  It's like a, it could be a back.

• 35:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it could be anything. It could be a snail smile.

• 35:32Speaker 01

  I don't get why he's writing a script.

• 35:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, very odd stuff.

• 35:37Speaker 01

  It's quite strange.

• 35:38Joe Rogan?

  But it's also like the way, like, enigmas never age. Have you noticed that? And Jeffrey, as a matter of fact, it was clear to me the last time I saw you. Like, if one of my friends sent me that, I'd be like, I'm getting a new number.

• 35:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, you need help. Why didn't you just write, happy birthday?

• 35:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, what the fuck is wrong with you, Enigma?

• 35:56Speaker 01

  Happy birthday, Jeff. That's all I want. Happy birthday, Jeff. May we hang out soon.

• 36:02Joe Rogan?

  Well, also, like, what year was this that he wrote this?

• 36:05Speaker 04

  I think it was for his 50th birthday was the word, so I'll see what year it would have been. It wouldn't have been that long ago, but.

• 36:13Joe Rogan?

  Well, it had to be because he kicked him out of Mar-a-Lago in like the 2000s, right?

• 36:17Speaker 04

  2011, I think is when they said that was.

• 36:19Joe Rogan?

  That's when they kicked him out?

• 36:20Speaker 04

  I think so.

• 36:21Joe Rogan?

  I thought it was before that because I think that's when he got arrested.

• 36:27Speaker 01

  They kicked Epstein out? Can I touch this?

• 36:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that is a recreation. That's a 3D printed recreation of these very strange vases that they find in Egypt that are part of an older dynasty that are so exact and the way they did it is completely unknown. That is just a piece of plastic, but it's, that's an actual 3D recreation of the original vase.

• 36:49Speaker 01

  That you think aliens did?

• 36:50Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no. I think a very complex ancient civilization that was wiped out by some sort of a cataclysmic disaster that had very sophisticated technology because that was, was it diorite that that was carved out of?

• 37:03Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 37:04Speaker 01

  Are you an alien guy or are you an agnostic alien guy?

• 37:07Joe Rogan?

  I'm on the fence.

• 37:08Speaker 01

  You're on the fence?

• 37:09Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 37:09Speaker 01

  You were an alien guy?

• 37:11Joe Rogan?

  I've been back and forth, off the fence, on the fence. I've been over the other side. I go back and forth. I think it's highly unlikely that we're alone, highly unlikely.

• 37:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 37:21Joe Rogan?

  And there's just too many stories of people having encounters with something for, people have been writing these things down for thousands of years. I haven't had any experience though.

• 37:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think it's like a relationship. If you want it too bad, you won't get it.

• 37:38Joe Rogan?

  Other than psychedelics, which makes me go hmm.

• 37:41Speaker 01

  You've seen guys?

• 37:42Joe Rogan?

  No, I've seen stuff. I've seen entities.

• 37:45Speaker 01

  Really?

• 37:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, 100%. I've had interactions with other beings.

• 37:49Speaker 01

  Tree entities or like space entities? I've had tree entities.

• 37:54Joe Rogan?

  Things that didn't have like a form that was solid. Their form would change and morph. And they had consciousness, but you know, it's like, what is, what's really going on? Like, are you really, is, are you imagining this or are you tapping in what it feels like? But it might not be this. What it feels like is you're tapping into another dimension and you're interacting with. Some disembodied souls, like disembodied consciousness that doesn't have a physical form. That's what it feels like.

• 38:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:26Joe Rogan?

  But it feels highly intelligent and very aware of what you're full of shit about, what you're, what you're not, like what your thoughts are, whether your thoughts are positive or negative, like it shows you negative thoughts and positive thoughts.

• 38:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, I was talking to Ari about that on his podcast about how like when I took acid, if I had a negative thought, all of the clouds would turn into skulls. And if I had a positive thought, they'd all turn into these dancers and I could switch it.

• 38:52Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 38:52Speaker 01

  I could just like switch and my entire visual would change with my mental.

• 38:56Joe Rogan?

  I had a very similar experience once where when I had negative thoughts, everything would go like black and pixelated and dark. And then I would have a positive, I would realize it like, oh, no, no, no, this, you're doing this. And then boom, it would blossom into these beautiful geometric patterns. I was like, oh.

• 39:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:16Joe Rogan?

  You're kind of in control of how you view things, which is in control of how your life works.

• 39:21Speaker 01

  That's the one thing that psychedelics wants you to get so hard. That's like the biggest, every time I do it, it feels like it's making fun of me. It's like, bro, this is all you. Like you have control.

• 39:30Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 39:30Speaker 01

  You can have a bad life or a good life, make the fucking choice.

• 39:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 39:33Speaker 01

  And every time I do it, I'm like, okay, I'll remember. And then the next day I'm like, ah, somebody said I'm fat on Twitter.

• 39:40Speaker 01

  You know, it's cra- I just had this big revelation the other day where I was like, what if everything is all right? Like I'm writing and then this swear thing happened and I'm like, I want to die. Everybody's, and I was like, oh yeah. Sometimes I feel like when you have those revelations, you get a little tested. You ever feel like that?

• 39:56Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 39:56Speaker 01

  Like I'll be like, when I'm things, when I'm like, okay, you know, like I was, my head was so big about the Netflix coming out, I drop in at the creek yesterday, do a new joke set, bomb, just bomb the whole way through, sweating, sweating in front of these people. They're like, they don't know who I am. They're just like, what are you saying? And I was like, just trying brand new weird stuff.

• 40:16Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 40:16Speaker 01

  Cause my ego's so big that I'm like, I don't even need to workshop this shit bitch. And I do it and they're just like, we don't understand you. And I'm like, anyway, what's the special? It's a lot better than that.

• 40:27Joe Rogan?

  It is the most humbling thing to work on new stuff after you put out a special. It's the most humbling, because you have no weapons.

• 40:33Speaker 01

  And you just were doing shows where you were like.

• 40:35Joe Rogan?

  Killing, bam, tight, ready.

• 40:38Speaker 01

  Totally. Looking at the notepad and being like, what else? Still nothing on there. Yeah, it's crazy.

• 40:43Joe Rogan?

  It's the hardest thing, is like coming up with subjects, you know?

• 40:47Speaker 01

  It's also hard when your brain is preoccupied with putting out a special, I've noticed.

• 40:50Joe Rogan?

  Right, right.

• 40:51Speaker 01

  Like, I'm editing, I'm thinking about shit, promotion, and then I'm like, have to... But that's why I think you have to take time.

• 40:58Joe Rogan?

  A hundred percent.

• 40:58Speaker 01

  But the rush. People are like, aren't you so proud of yourself? And I'm like, no, because now I'm doing bad sets.

• 41:03Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 41:04Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? I don't have time to be proud, because I'm going up on stage and being like, throw here something I was thinking, you know, and it never...

• 41:09Joe Rogan?

  I think that's a good thing for us. It's a good, like, reality check.

• 41:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's great.

• 41:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, like, every couple of years, you gotta get smacked in the face and start from scratch again.

• 41:18Speaker 01

  It's really good.

• 41:19Joe Rogan?

  Brian Simpson did a brilliant thing. So what Brian Simpson did is he developed two hours. So he put out one hour, and then when he went touring afterwards, he had another hour already.

• 41:29Speaker 01

  Well, I thought he asked Ari, I thought he was like, can I put out both hours? Can I put out all of it?

• 41:34Joe Rogan?

  Don't do that.

• 41:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 41:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I think what he did was perfect.

• 41:37Speaker 01

  When I did the half hour, I had that. I did, put a half hour out, and I was fucking cruising. But this one, I, any fat that I had, I cut and was like, I hate, you're dead to me.

• 41:47Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 41:48Speaker 01

  So all of the stuff I liked, I put in it. So then when I was touring, I was like, I've already decided that I hate that. I can bring it back up, but I don't want to.

• 41:56Joe Rogan?

  Right, and then you feel like you're a fraud if you do.

• 41:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 41:59Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. And if you're not interested in the subject, like, if you're like, it is dead to me, it's over.

• 42:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 42:05Joe Rogan?

  You gotta let it go.

• 42:06Speaker 01

  Totally. It's crazy. And it's hard to be on stage and talking about what I want to talk about, which is how crazy it is to be putting out a special, you know what I mean? But I don't want to do that, because I want to do evergreen material.

• 42:17Joe Rogan?

  Also, that's like, it's just not relatable.

• 42:20Speaker 01

  Not relatable, but you're like, I want to tell you guys about this, that's what's on my mind.

• 42:24Joe Rogan?

  Especially the people that don't know who you are, that's really not relatable.

• 42:28Speaker 01

  Yeah. Bill Burr was very inspiring, because he put out that special about how he changed his mindset.

• 42:35Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 42:35Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? The most recent one, where he was like, I'm not going to be an angry person anymore. And that was sick, because I feel like... Sometimes I'll be like, maybe I should have a perspective shift where I am stopping such an angry person and against humanity. And I'm like, no, but that's not funny. So seeing Burr do that, I'm like, oh, I could have material about how like, therapy helps, you know, instead of how my therapist sucks. You know what I mean? Like, and that was nice to see him do that. Where he was like, I'm gonna stop harassing my wife. That was the whole special. It was like, my wife is like, gonna die someday, and I'm making her life quite bad. It was great.

• 43:08Joe Rogan?

  When I was young, I had this stupid idea in my mind that you should stray away from meditation, or enlightenment, or anything, because it would get in the way of being funny.

• 43:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 43:20Joe Rogan?

  It would get in the way of chaos.

• 43:21Speaker 01

  I have that with relationships. I get, I'm like, I'm gonna keep this tumultuous relationship, and I'm just gonna keep, like, that's how I thrive.

• 43:27Joe Rogan?

  Mining for material?

• 43:28Speaker 01

  Mining for material. Just keep myself in a, in a state of like, unknown constantly, so that I feel like I'm alive.

• 43:35Joe Rogan?

  Ooh.

• 43:36Speaker 01

  Because I feel like I'll die if I have any comfort or stability. I look, my studio is the size of this table. There's no reason I should live like that. It's crazy. It's, there's no reason. But I just keep myself in these little fucking-

• 43:46Joe Rogan?

  Do you like living in New York like that?

• 43:48Speaker 01

  I don't need to. I can live in a bigger place in New York. It's totally fine.

• 43:51Joe Rogan?

  So you're doing it to yourself?

• 43:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm doing it to myself to be like, you have to struggle. And you don't, don't, you don't even get to clean your tuna cans. You have to leave. It's crazy. It's crazy.

• 44:01Joe Rogan?

  At least you know it's crazy.

• 44:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally. And I'm working on it. I am working on it.

• 44:05Joe Rogan?

  Oh, okay.

• 44:05Speaker 01

  I am working on it.

• 44:06Joe Rogan?

  Talking to a realtor?

• 44:07Speaker 01

  I'm talking, I'm talking to two therapists.

• 44:09Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 44:09Speaker 01

  And, yeah, that's the other thing is, I'm like, I don't wanna get a bigger place if I'm gonna buy a place in New York.

• 44:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 44:14Speaker 01

  You know what I mean?

• 44:15Joe Rogan?

  Eventually, you're gonna buy a place. Right.

• 44:16Speaker 01

  So I'm like, maybe just struggle.

• 44:18Joe Rogan?

  It's a weird time for the real estate market right now.

• 44:20Speaker 01

  I bought a house in Ithaca.

• 44:22Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah? Upstate?

• 44:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, upstate.

• 44:25Joe Rogan?

  Oh, you're one of them people that gets the upstate house. You go to visit.

• 44:28Speaker 01

  It's like, five hours from New York, so.

• 44:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah?

• 44:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, people are like, upstate. And I'm like, no, it's like, paintball upstate, dude. It's-

• 44:33Joe Rogan?

  So do you take a flight, or you drive?

• 44:35Speaker 01

  I take a, there's a flight from JFK now. Which is sick.

• 44:38Joe Rogan?

  And you go to Ithaca and what, just watch TV?

• 44:41Speaker 01

  I just, I mainly just work on the house and work on the, you know, just do shit to get it up and around. I don't know what I'm gonna do when it's done.

• 44:48Joe Rogan?

  So you just like being in a small town?

• 44:51Speaker 01

  Well, my family's there.

• 44:52Joe Rogan?

  Oh, okay, that makes sense.

• 44:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, my niece is there.

• 44:55Joe Rogan?

  That makes sense.

• 44:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:56Joe Rogan?

  Okay. But I like hiding. Did you just pick Ithaca?

• 44:59Speaker 01

  No way, no way. My whole family's there. And I was so sick of going home and having to stay with my mom the whole time and...

• 45:04Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's smart.

• 45:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, she walked in on me having sex so many times.

• 45:07Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 45:08Speaker 01

  It's so annoying, just swinging open the door. "Oh, sorry." That's her, every single time.

• 45:12Joe Rogan?

  That's hilarious.

• 45:13Speaker 01

  Cause she's deaf, so she can't hear shit.

• 45:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no.

• 45:15Speaker 01

  So she'll just swing it open. "Oh, okay." It's fucking crazy, dude. And her house just has holes in it, cause she's a contractor, so she hasn't finished it.

• 45:25Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no.

• 45:25Speaker 01

  So there's just like rac- they'll be like, she'll just be scurrying around and be like, "There's a raccoon in here." I'm like, "What?" All the time, dude. It's crazy. "There's a chipmunk on my laptop." I'm like, "Get it away."

• 45:38Speaker 01

  Bats coming in constantly.

• 45:40Joe Rogan?

  And then your dad's fainting?

• 45:41Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm. Dad's dead now. Dad finally fainted his last faint.

• 45:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no.

• 45:46Speaker 01

  It was, it was good. He worked all day, came home, died. It was, we were happy about it.

• 45:51Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 45:51Speaker 01

  I mean, we didn't want him to die, but yeah, he was, he was like getting to a point where we were like, he's gonna have to start going to the hospital, cause he smokes so many cigarettes and is so unhealthy. And we're like, if he goes to the hospital, it's game over. He can't be around. He'll faint if he sees a hospital. It's like, he like knew it was happening. It was like, I'd rather die.

• 46:08Joe Rogan?

  Did the cigarettes get him?

• 46:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, cigarettes and Dunkin' Donuts. Love Dunkin' Donuts, donuts.

• 46:15Joe Rogan?

  Both of those things.

• 46:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 46:16Joe Rogan?

  Very addicted.

• 46:17Speaker 01

  Very addictive.

• 46:21Speaker 01

  He was a heavy smoker. That's why I wanna kill Ian all the time.

• 46:23Joe Rogan?

  Cause he smokes so much?

• 46:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, and he sounds like my dad with the "uh, uh, uh," where you laugh and you go "uh, uh."

• 46:28Joe Rogan?

  Ian seems like he really enjoys it, though.

• 46:31Speaker 01

  You, that's what everybody says, until they're hacking up a lung and they have to leave a movie theater halfway through to go smoke.

• 46:36Joe Rogan?

  How much does Ian smoke a day?

• 46:38Speaker 01

  I think he's down. I think he's down to like a pack and a half.

• 46:42Joe Rogan?

  Oh, god.

• 46:43Speaker 01

  He's getting there. I need to get him onto zins, but he thinks that's gay.

• 46:46Joe Rogan?

  Zins are gay?

• 46:47Speaker 01

  He thinks, yeah.

• 46:48Joe Rogan?

  What about all the stuff he talks about on stage?

• 46:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, that, he thinks is... Perfectly regular and above board. Perfectly regular and above board.

• 46:56Joe Rogan?

  But zins are gay. That's so silly. That's what a silly take.

• 47:00Speaker 01

  But so many people have that. That's like when people are like, I'm not gonna enter recovery because I don't believe in God. I'm like, you were drunk last night praying that you could fuck, you know, Sydney Sweeney. Like, you're praying. You're doing weird stuff. You're delusional.

• 47:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, I don't wanna believe in God. That's hilarious.

• 47:18Speaker 01

  People say that a lot, where they avoid AA because they don't believe in God.

• 47:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. What's weird is the guy who founded AA did it, he was an acid head. He used acid to get off of alcohol.

• 47:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 47:30Joe Rogan?

  But he doesn't.

• 47:31Speaker 01

  Talk about that.

• 47:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 47:33Speaker 01

  I used mushrooms to get off alcohol.

• 47:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I've heard a lot of people do that.

• 47:37Speaker 01

  I use mushrooms to cure like a huge amount of OCD. I was like OCD was dominating my life. Couldn't touch anything, had to wash my hands constantly. It was like, and then I tripped hard and went into a room alone for six hours and was like, I will. And it was, I was tripping hard. And I was like, I'm gonna deal with this in this room and figure out what it is.

• 47:58Joe Rogan?

  And what was it?

• 48:00Speaker 01

  It was that I fundamentally don't trust myself to make the right decision. And I realized that none of my decisions were up to me. It was all just an amalgamation of experiences. Cause I was like, who's gonna stop me from biting or hurting or doing anything? So I was like, if I tap this, that'll stop me. And when I faced it in acid, it was like, you think you're gonna do bad things, but you're not because you have done, you have chosen the right path this whole way so you can trust yourself. You know what I mean?

• 48:28Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 48:28Speaker 01

  Three-year-old Jordan was not outside killing a cat. You know what I mean? She was fucking playing, right? Like, so every step of the way, you're building this personality that you can trust. You know what I mean?

• 48:39Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 48:40Speaker 01

  Because my whole thing was like, who? How am I to know that I'm not a horrible, that I'm not gonna do something horrible? Which is a big OCD thing for people.

• 48:48Joe Rogan?

  Wondering whether you're gonna do something horrible.

• 48:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, like a lot of OCD, like I know a girl who, she couldn't babysit, cuz she was like, what if I am a pedophile?

• 48:57Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god.

• 48:58Speaker 01

  Cuz her OCD was so bad.

• 48:59Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god.

• 49:00Speaker 01

  And then she was like, oh, this is OCD, and she was treated, and she was like, it's fine. But like, a lot of people, people will have babies, and they'll be like, what if I frickin' spin this baby's head off?

• 49:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Jesus Christ, that's so crazy.

• 49:11Speaker 01

  I have that all the time, dude. I have that. Whenever my friends like, hold my baby, I'm like, okay.

• 49:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god, that's so crazy.

• 49:15Speaker 01

  But you don't do shit, cuz it's like the, it's like the ski jump thing. You're gonna...

• 49:20Joe Rogan?

  That's interesting. I never thought of it that way. It's like, you not trusting yourself.

• 49:24Speaker 01

  Yeah. And I also used to be super fat, like I was a fat kid. And I think there's a part of me that's like, if you were able to do that, then you're able to do horrible things. You know what I mean?

• 49:33Joe Rogan?

  If you're able to get fat?

• 49:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, like if you were able to binge eat like that as a kid, then you're not really to be trusted. You know what I mean? And I had to face all of that on this acid trip, and I came out of it and was like...

• 49:44Joe Rogan?

  Was it acid or mushrooms?

• 49:45Speaker 01

  That was acid.

• 49:46Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 49:47Speaker 01

  Mushrooms, I microdose. Acid, I don't do anymore cuz of how crazy that was. But that one, I did a lot and came...

• 49:54Joe Rogan?

  You got it.

• 49:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 49:55Joe Rogan?

  You're like, I got it, got the lesson, I'm not going back to school.

• 49:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally, totally. And I still have a little bit of OCD. I still have some things that I didn't get rid of, but for the most part, I got rid of it, which is crazy.

• 50:05Joe Rogan?

  God, it seems debilitating. I've met people that have it, it's nuts. And some people, it gets worse as like their success grows, which is really crazy.

• 50:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:15Joe Rogan?

  Like Howard Hughes type shit, where you, you know?

• 50:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 50:19Speaker 01

  I loved that movie growing up cuz I resonated with him so much.

• 50:21Joe Rogan?

  It's weird.

• 50:23Speaker 01

  You gotta stop it. I mean, that's the thing, is if you don't get in the way of it, it just builds neuronal grooves in your brain that becomes so...

• 50:31Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 50:32Speaker 01

  Like averse to plasticity, like you can't get out of them. And that's what, I remember like this woman being like, I want you to bring in contaminated items. And I was like, go fuck yourself, bitch. I was like, absolutely not. I was like, then we'd have to burn my mother's car, like, there's no way. But you do, every time something's contaminated a little bit, you have to like, force yourself to do it, to touch it, or whatever your thing is.

• 50:56Joe Rogan?

  Like contaminated food?

• 50:57Speaker 01

  For me, it was contamination was if some, when I was younger, I was worried that I would become... Like, say you were like, "I cheated on my wife last night." And then you're like, "You wanna hit this vape or whatever?" I wouldn't be able to touch it, because I'd be like, "He does bad things. If I hit that vape, I'll do bad things."

• 51:15Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 51:16Speaker 01

  You know, so if somebody was whack, they'd be contaminated. And I couldn't go near them.

• 51:21Joe Rogan?

  There's something to that.

• 51:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:24Joe Rogan?

  There's a little something to that. There's a little wisdom behind that.

• 51:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:28Joe Rogan?

  Because people do kind of adopt the mindset of people they're around.

• 51:32Speaker 01

  I mean, that's what I've had to learn recently, is I'm like, "You gotta cut out whack people and get that that's not OCD. That's like, healthy for you."

• 51:38Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, whack people can ruin everything.

• 51:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:42Joe Rogan?

  Really shitty human beings that you have kept in your life for whatever fucking weird reason, they can just derail your whole life.

• 51:50Speaker 01

  The thing that sucks about comedy is sometimes these people are so fucking funny.

• 51:54Joe Rogan?

  I know.

• 51:55Speaker 01

  And you have to cut out somebody who's so funny.

• 51:58Joe Rogan?

  I know.

• 51:59Speaker 01

  That sucks.

• 52:00Joe Rogan?

  I know, it does suck. It does suck.

• 52:01Speaker 01

  People at a desk job, I'm like, "You're cutting out Brian, who's like, kinda, you know, who's like, just alright, who brought you a cupcake once." I'm cutting out people who are like, the only people I can say racist shit around.

• 52:12Joe Rogan?

  Uhhhh.

• 52:13Speaker 01

  You're like, cutting out like, a huge chord of my sense of humor.

• 52:17Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 52:18Speaker 01

  And that, but I've had to do that recently, just be like, "Dude, I can't. The vibe is too dark."

• 52:22Joe Rogan?

  Ugh. This episode is brought to you by The Mosquito Bowl. Here's a story that's pretty incredible. After Pearl Harbor, four of the best college football players in America walk away from promising NFL careers to enlist in the Marines and fight in World War II. And the craziest part, it's a true story. These guys had their whole lives ahead of them, but traded the glory of the gridiron for the brutal reality of combat, where the stakes were life and death. Directed by Peter Berg, the guy behind Friday Night Lights, and starring Nicholas Galitzine, Bill Skarsgård, Ray Nicholson, and Tom Francis. The Mosquito Bowl, now playing in theaters.

• 53:04Joe Rogan?

  This episode is brought to you by ZipRecruiter. Believe it or not, the holiday season is here again, and that means you might need to fill some seasonal roles, fast. Maybe you need extra cashiers or stalkers, or maybe something more unique, like a lead elf, or an expert gift wrapper, or a Zamboni driver. Whoever you're looking for, whatever skills you need to power through the rest of the year, ZipRecruiter is one of the best places to start your search. Because you can try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/rogan. And because ZipRecruiter helps sort through thousands of resumes and applications, showing you the most qualified and interesting ones first.

• 53:46Joe Rogan?

  There's even an option for candidates to explain why they want the job. Let ZipRecruiter find the right people for your roles, seasonal or otherwise. Try it for free today at ziprecruiter.com/rogan. That's ziprecruiter.com/rogan. Meet your match on ZipRecruiter.

• 54:08Speaker 01

  It's sinister.

• 54:09Joe Rogan?

  It is a problem.

• 54:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:12Joe Rogan?

  There's people in your life that just, for whatever fucking reason, will never get it together. And at a certain point in time, you try to rescue a drowning person, they'll drown you.

• 54:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 54:23Joe Rogan?

  They'll drown you.

• 54:24Speaker 01

  It's hard to watch other people do it and not cut people out. And you're like, that, if you could just cut... Like, my friend's mom is just such a drain on her life, and I'm like, you gotta just...

• 54:33Joe Rogan?

  Did you see that fucking Netflix documentary about that little girl who was in the small town, who's getting harassed by someone that turned out to be her mom?

• 54:42Speaker 01

  I heard about this, but I did not see it. Oh, I saw this on Instagram, and I thought it was not real.

• 54:49Joe Rogan?

  It's nuts.

• 54:50Speaker 01

  She was getting bullied by her mom?

• 54:52Joe Rogan?

  Her mom didn't have a job. The father thought the mom had a job. The mom was just all day trolling and fucking with her daughter for years. And you know what the girl said at one point in time? She's like, "I miss my mom." Because her mom was there to protect her from the bad world. But really, the only bad world was her mom pretending to be someone else.

• 55:14Speaker 01

  Wait, she said, "I miss my mom..."

• 55:15Joe Rogan?

  Because she thought her mom was a sweet person that protected her, and she found out her mom was a fucking monster.

• 55:20Speaker 01

  Oh, so later, after she found out, she was like, "I miss my mom."

• 55:24Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 55:25Speaker 01

  Oh, that's brutal.

• 55:25Joe Rogan?

  Brutal.

• 55:26Speaker 01

  That's like when somebody breaks up with you and you're like, I just want to talk to them about this bad breakup.

• 55:30Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's that thing that some crazy people do. It's Munchausen's by proxy.

• 55:36Speaker 01

  So she was, is that Munchausen's though?

• 55:38Joe Rogan?

  Isn't that what it is? Where you hurt them. You hurt them so that you could help them.

• 55:44Speaker 01

  Oh, she was doing that. She was being like, who's your?

• 55:46Joe Rogan?

  She was the one who was trolling her own daughter. She was someone else online attacking her own daughter, calling her a whore, calling her horrible thing.

• 55:55Speaker 01

  And being like, PS, your mom's a babe.

• 56:00Joe Rogan?

  Your mom's an enigma.

• 56:01Speaker 01

  Your mom's really hot. You should go talk to her. Yeah, your mom's an enigma.

• 56:03Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, your mom, I noticed your mom's an enigma. Yeah.

• 56:07Speaker 01

  I think you noticed that too.

• 56:09Joe Rogan?

  So the moment I saw you, I noticed it.

• 56:10Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 56:11Joe Rogan?

  Crazy. It's so sad. I don't know. I didn't get that far. I can't. With the stuff like that, when people are mean to their kids, I'm like, I can't do this.

• 56:20Speaker 01

  I love that shit.

• 56:21Joe Rogan?

  I can't.

• 56:22Speaker 01

  I don't love it, but I fucking fall asleep to that horrible shit.

• 56:25Joe Rogan?

  It's hard. If you love your ki- I love my kids. I can't, I'd see some, seeing someone being that, it's not just, it's fucking evil beyond belief.

• 56:35Speaker 01

  How old are your kids?

• 56:35Joe Rogan?

  She tortured that, I have a 28-year-old daughter. I have a 17 and a 15.

• 56:41Speaker 01

  Wait, if you were, if you have a 28-year-old, you were?

• 56:44Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's not my biological.

• 56:46Speaker 01

  Oh, okay, okay, okay.

• 56:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 56:47Speaker 01

  So, did you have any kids where all your kids had after you were financially good?

• 56:52Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 56:53Speaker 01

  Really?

• 56:53Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 56:53Speaker 01

  You think that's the move?

• 56:55Joe Rogan?

  I don't know. There's something to be said for growing up poor.

• 57:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:02Joe Rogan?

  You know, I grew up poor. I think it's good. I think I, I understand hard work, you know? I understand what it's like to have to have a job to get stuff. Like, you know, you want to buy a new pair of pants? You need to get a fucking job, you know? You need to get a car. Well, you have to save up.

• 57:18Speaker 01

  But all those things you're describing, you can do. Poor, growing up poor for me is like, growing up watching your parents fight over who is gonna pay the child support. You know what I mean? I think you can grow up fine.

• 57:31Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 57:32Speaker 01

  And still work.

• 57:33Joe Rogan?

  Well, my parents didn't fight. My, my, my stepmom and my, uh, excuse me, my stepdad and my mom have been together for a long time and they have a very good relationship. So I'm, that, that like modeled for me when I was a, when I was a kid. My parents got split up, my biological dad and my mom, when I was five, and my mom married my stepdad when I was like seven.

• 57:53Speaker 01

  Where's your dad, dad?

• 57:55Joe Rogan?

  We don't talk.

• 57:56Speaker 01

  Oh, we don't talk.

• 57:56Joe Rogan?

  I don't know him.

• 57:57Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 57:58Joe Rogan?

  But my stepdad's a great guy.

• 57:59Speaker 01

  So you have good parents.

• 58:01Joe Rogan?

  They have a, they modeled a good relationship when I was a kid of people that don't yell at each other, don't fight.

• 58:06Speaker 01

  That's nice.

• 58:07Joe Rogan?

  Get along.

• 58:08Speaker 01

  That's why you can be in a-

• 58:08Joe Rogan?

  They have disagreements and stuff.

• 58:10Speaker 01

  Loving relationship.

• 58:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they have disagreements, but they're nice to each other, kind to each other. And, um, you know, if you see that when you're a kid, you go, oh, this is possible. But if you see like chaos all the time and everyone's fighting and screaming and yelling at each other, you're like, keep me the fuck away from whatever this is.

• 58:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:32Joe Rogan?

  You know, cause I remember I watched my grand, my grandmother and my grandparents. My grandmother was always yelling at my grandfather. I was like, oh, don't stay married, whatever you do. I was like, when I was a little kid, I was like, you gotta get out while you can.

• 58:42Speaker 01

  Yeah. I think that's why there's so many avoidant men right now is because I think there's so many of those like lazy boy dads who are like dissociated, looking at a TV that isn't on. And every time they try to like, you know, every time you're like, hey Jim, how's it going? Their like wife flies in, is like, don't talk to him for us. Like, there's so many couples like that.

• 59:01Joe Rogan?

  Well, there's a lot of cucked out men out there. Cucked out by their job, cucked out by life.

• 59:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:08Joe Rogan?

  You just stop being a man. And then you stop getting any respect from the people that know you, cause they know you're kind of a bitch. The people that really know you, like your wife and your kids really know you, like, oh, Harry, Harry's a fucking bitch.

• 59:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's so many boomers like that though. There's so many where it's, the dad is so quiet and so distant and the mom is just so up everyone's ass.

• 59:29Joe Rogan?

  Thoreau wrote about that, like, what, whenever he wrote this, he said, most men live lives of quiet desperation.

• 59:36Speaker 01

  That's fucked.

• 59:37Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 59:38Speaker 01

  That's fucked.

• 59:39Joe Rogan?

  That's fucked, but that's real.

• 59:40Speaker 01

  But why does that happen?

• 59:41Joe Rogan?

  Well, there's a whole bunch of reasons because you stopped challenging yourself, or you never did. You stopped growing and, and you, you don't have any character. You don't exhibit a strong will and you don't have discipline. And then, you know, you're emotionally disconnected from the life that you've chosen. And then you have a job where you have to pretend to be someone you're not for eight hours a day. Work for a boss who's a piece of shit.

• 1:00:06Speaker 01

  And then you lose the job because the job becomes irrelevant.

• 1:00:09Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, and then you're, you're a broken man. And then you're like 46 years old and they're telling you to learn to code.

• 1:00:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:16Joe Rogan?

  Like, oh, great.

• 1:00:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, that's fucked.

• 1:00:19Joe Rogan?

  A lot of people, they don't know what to do and they didn't get good advice when they were young. They didn't get a good direction. You know, they didn't, they didn't find something that they could focus their energy on and realize like, oh, if I focus my energy on something, whatever it is, I can get better at stuff. I'll start off sucky, but you keep working at it and eventually you get, some people never learn that.

• 1:00:40Speaker 01

  Well, it'd be nice if they could also focus on being a parent. Like, I feel like the women stay loud because they're like, I'm a mother, I'm mama bear. You know, so I'm like, it'd be nice if the dads would get off the lazy boy and be like, I'm gonna help raise my kids. Instead of just be like, let's see.

• 1:00:54Joe Rogan?

  You know, it's just fucking, some people are just beaten. Life is just, they wanted to be spied around.

• 1:00:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:59Joe Rogan?

  They wanted to be cool, they wanted, they wanted to have a good life and life just fucking cracked them in the dick every time they made a move.

• 1:01:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:01:07Joe Rogan?

  You know, they got their car repossessed, oh, Jesus, credit cards.

• 1:01:10Speaker 01

  There's gotta be something biological, though, that makes a man not, like, you have the pride, Burt Kreischer, I just talked about it, like, you guys have the pride in your children hardcore. Like, as soon as I met you, you showed me a photo of your daughter, you know what I mean? Like, but I do feel like there are a lot of men who are like, that's not my responsibility.

• 1:01:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's crazy. That's crazy. Well, maybe it's the way they were raised, you know? But.

• 1:01:35Speaker 01

  But maybe if you had lost your job, if you weren't in comedy and you were tired and didn't have your, didn't have your passion, maybe you wouldn't be as gung ho about being a dad. Or maybe you'd feel like a failed dad, maybe that's what it is, maybe they feel like a failed dad.

• 1:01:47Joe Rogan?

  Perhaps, I don't know, I would've figured it out.

• 1:01:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally.

• 1:01:51Joe Rogan?

  I just don't believe that. I just, if I lost my job doing something, I would find another job, I would figure it out. There's, there's other paths, you don't just stay still if the path doesn't work out. And some people do.

• 1:02:02Speaker 01

  Some people do, I didn't know that until recently, that some people really do stay still forever.

• 1:02:07Joe Rogan?

  Oh, they quit, that, well, that's why they love unemployment, because they could just get a check and just still, and just wallow in depression.

• 1:02:14Speaker 01

  There's so many people who are against unemployment that still, that still stay still, that are like, fuck, fuck unemployment, I'm not using the government.

• 1:02:20Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, that's even sillier, I guess, I don't know. Yeah, people are weird, you know, just.

• 1:02:27Speaker 01

  If I quit comedy right now, there'd be like three jobs that I would be almost just as stoked about.

• 1:02:32Joe Rogan?

  What would those be?

• 1:02:34Speaker 01

  I would love to be a full-time contractor out in the sticks. I would be a philosophy professor or a therapist.

• 1:02:42Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 1:02:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, all of those sound sick.

• 1:02:44Joe Rogan?

  Which one sounds the most sick?

• 1:02:46Speaker 01

  Philosophy professor, because you kind of become a therapist when you are a professor. You know what I mean? You have those kids that are fucked up, so they're reading philosophy and they need help. Like me, I was going in there being like.

• 1:02:56Joe Rogan?

  Or the guys that are trying to get laid.

• 1:02:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:59Joe Rogan?

  Trying to become.

• 1:02:59Speaker 01

  It's a lot of dorks.

• 1:03:01Joe Rogan?

  Bet.

• 1:03:01Speaker 01

  It's like, I was the only girl major in my class, and the rest were.

• 1:03:06Joe Rogan?

  Dorky guys?

• 1:03:07Speaker 01

  Dorks who wore ties to class, yeah.

• 1:03:09Joe Rogan?

  Well, philosophy itself is a strange thing, because you're just thinking about a structure of how you interface with the world.

• 1:03:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was the only thing I could study well. Everything else, I was like, why would I study something that's already been known? Is it crazy? But philosophy was like, no, they're all just trying to figure out life, which I was like, okay, I get that. And none of them are correct, and they're like, none of them are correct. And I was like, great. Because I would study science, they'd be like, we know the exact measurement of how to find out this thing. And I'd be like, why do I want to study that? There's nothing new here.

• 1:03:39Joe Rogan?

  My favorite book of philosophy I started reading when I was like, I guess I was 16, is The Book of Five Rings by Miyamoto Musashi. He's a samurai who killed 60 men in one-on-one combat with swords. But he was all about the way to become a great swordfighter is you have to be balanced. Like, you can't have any holes in your game as a human being. You have to be an artist, you have to be a poet, you have to learn calligraphy. You have to be completely balanced, and you have to see the thing for what it is. You can't have any bullshit. You can't have any fat, right? We were talking about fat and bits. You can't have any bullshit. There's no bullshit when you're sword fighting.

• 1:04:17Speaker 01

  But sometimes, do you ever feel like you're in that flow state in your life where you'll be like, I have all these moving parts and I have it down? And like, I recently had this where I was like. I'm oil painting, I'm doing stand-up, I have my friends, I'm in this groove. And then something will happen where I'll just like have like explosive diarrhea or something like. Something will happen where I'm just like, Jesus Christ, I thought I was fucking suave, I had this shit. I used to do that with poker where I'd be like, I have this whole poker game on lock and then something would hap- like. The, it's almost like one of those swords that you have to have in balance is also humility. Like you also have to be like, and I'm a person who still has a butthole, you know?

• 1:04:55Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:04:56Speaker 01

  And that I've had to learn.

• 1:04:57Joe Rogan?

  And things can go sideways, always.

• 1:04:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, because I would be like, I'm gonna get in this flow state, da-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da. And then I'd mess up a word on stage and I'd be like, nah, I'm an idiot, you know? So I have to keep that also, be like, you also are fallible.

• 1:05:09Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's what's a good thing about stand-up, it's like, it smacks you every time you do it wrong.

• 1:05:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:15Joe Rogan?

  You gotta do it right.

• 1:05:16Speaker 01

  It, you, it's crazy how true it is that you're only good, as good as your last set.

• 1:05:20Joe Rogan?

  You are.

• 1:05:20Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 1:05:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's why, like, if you have a bad set, you can't wait to get on stage again, like, get me up there.

• 1:05:25Speaker 01

  Dude, I was like, I'm doing no sets in Austin, bomb last night, hitting Rebecca up, I'm like, what do you got? It's crazy.

• 1:05:32Joe Rogan?

  Hope you bust out some old jokes, fuck it.

• 1:05:32Speaker 01

  I should have hit up the mothership.

• 1:05:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, come tonight. What do you do tonight? My show.

• 1:05:37Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 1:05:38Joe Rogan?

  You wanna do it?

• 1:05:39Speaker 01

  What time's it at?

• 1:05:39Joe Rogan?

  Seven.

• 1:05:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, that would actually be good.

• 1:05:42Joe Rogan?

  Let's fucking go.

• 1:05:43Speaker 01

  Let's do it. I was, dude, there's a clip I wanted to post about, that's really funny about your, about your club where. I was like, you get in here and there's a guy who's like, my name's Kyle, I'll carry you up this flight of stairs. I have a, I have a PhD in MMA, I'm gonna pass you off to Derek, Derek has an AK-47. And we get in the green room and I'm like, they're like, do you need anything? We'll kill people for you. And I was like, could I have some like almonds or snacks? And they're like, no, we have smelling salts. I was like, wait.

• 1:06:11Speaker 01

  I was like, is there any just like water bottles? They're like, no, we have neurotropic dust.

• 1:06:15Joe Rogan?

  It was so funny, we, neurotropic. We were in the, uh, green room the other day and, uh, someone had called us like some alt-right, white supremacist club. I was in the room with Brian Simpson, who's black, Derek Poston, who's black, Hassan Amad, who's Muslim. It was Tony Hinchcliffe, Ron White and me, I'm like, this is a pre-diverse lineup. Like, what are we talking, this is so silly.

• 1:06:39Speaker 01

  You're looking at comments, see, it's hard, it's hard to not look at these fucking things.

• 1:06:42Joe Rogan?

  It wasn't, it was a video, it wasn't a comment, it was a video of someone that one of the guys was playing. It was like, look how fucking stupid this is. The idea that this, like, that you had to be, like.

• 1:06:55Joe Rogan?

  I'm not even a Republican. Like, I voted for Trump because I thought we were going in a terrifying direction where there was not really a president for four years and the same people are now gonna be running the government, like, let's-

• 1:07:07Speaker 01

  Weren't you like a Bernie bro?

• 1:07:08Joe Rogan?

  Yes! So, I've only voted Republican once in my life. The idea that you have to be a Republican to get in at that club is so ridiculous. That club is filled with gay people, black people, straight people, white people, Asian- no one gives a fuck.

• 1:07:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, that green room is colorful as fuck.

• 1:07:26Joe Rogan?

  You're just doing comedy. You're just doing comedy. Whoever you are, whatever you believe, we have tons of lively discussions-

• 1:07:32Speaker 01

  I will say, one time I was there and Jordan Peterson walked through and I was like, "You can't be here, that's too on the nose."

• 1:07:38Joe Rogan?

  He's here all the time.

• 1:07:39Speaker 01

  That's crazy!

• 1:07:40Joe Rogan?

  It is weird, yeah.

• 1:07:41Speaker 01

  That's crazy, with his daughter?

• 1:07:42Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, he came with his daughter, yeah. He's been there a few times. Yeah, he even did Kill Tony.

• 1:07:48Speaker 01

  Oh, he was on it?

• 1:07:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he was on Kill Tony.

• 1:07:50Speaker 01

  That's crazy. Oh yeah!

• 1:07:52Joe Rogan?

  So was Post Malone. Post Malone had no idea, and I brought him onstage, he had no idea what the show was, no idea what anything was, and I just brought him up there.

• 1:08:00Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:08:01Joe Rogan?

  I did that twice. Once with Post Malone and once with Tucker Carlson. I was having dinner with Tucker Carlson, I'm like, "You wanna go by and go see Kill Tony?" And they were there and I told Tony, and he's like, "Bring him onstage." I go, "I'm not even gonna tell him what it is." So I go, "Dude, we're gonna go onstage." And he's like, "What?"

• 1:08:15Speaker 01

  Oh my god!

• 1:08:16Joe Rogan?

  But he was great!

• 1:08:17Speaker 01

  Was he good?

• 1:08:18Joe Rogan?

  Yes, he was funny, he was like laughing, he was cracking jokes with the comedians back and forth.

• 1:08:23Speaker 01

  Wow!

• 1:08:23Joe Rogan?

  It was really surprisingly great.

• 1:08:26Speaker 01

  Wait, you're not Republican, you used to be Bernie bro?

• 1:08:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:30Speaker 01

  Are you Bernie bro?

• 1:08:31Joe Rogan?

  I am. Look, I think the idea of socialism is wonderful if everybody had their shit together and everybody was disciplined.

• 1:08:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:08:39Joe Rogan?

  But it's not the case. And I think that human nature, unfortunately, you're gonna need some socialism though, right? You're gonna need the fire department, like, this is one of the things that I point to all the time. People say, "Oh, socialism doesn't work." The fire department is an entirely socialist idea. Like, we all pay into it and they take care of everybody's fire, right? You can't have only the rich people have a fire department and the poor people, their fucking house burns down all the time, that's crazy, right? We all agree to that. Well, that should be the same with education, that should be the same with healthcare. Are we a fucking community or are we not? And if we're a community, you have to take care of the downtrodden and you have to do it because it's bad for them and it's also bad for you. We're all in this together, so you have to have a social safety net, I believe in all that.

• 1:09:24Joe Rogan?

  But I also believe you can't just give people free money because then they rely on it. And they become dependent on it and then it takes away their ambition and then they don't do anything. That's, that's true too. It doesn't mean you're not compassionate. I don't like either one of these parties.

• 1:09:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:38Joe Rogan?

  I don't think, I don't think they, there's a solution that's correct. I think you have overcorrection after overcorrection. I think you have the country goes one way and then it swings hard the other way. Yeah, America's back. And then it swings the other way. Now we're the new America and America's this way. It's like everyone's so tribal and everyone's so locked into their idea that they're the good guys. And these are the bad guys. We gotta get them back and we're gonna get them in the midterms. We're gonna get them in the fucking next elections like.

• 1:10:08Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 1:10:10Joe Rogan?

  And it's all accentuated by Twitter.

• 1:10:11Speaker 01

  Back and forth like that.

• 1:10:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, sorta. It's all on who you talk to with comedy. It's like, there's a lot of bitter people out there. But, you know, that's that old expression, I forget who said that. That we brought this up before, that all criticism is the tragic result of unmet needs.

• 1:10:30Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:10:31Joe Rogan?

  It's a paraphrase, but there's a lot of that there. There's a lot of like.

• 1:10:36Joe Rogan?

  I don't like how Jordan is like, why does she have a fucking Netflix special? She middled for me once and she didn't even do good.

• 1:10:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, did somebody say that?

• 1:10:49Speaker 01

  Dude, I'm just somebody who, I mean, I fucking, I'll date a libertarian and become a fucking libertarian. I'll, somebody will talk to me about Israel. I'll listen to fucking one Sam Harris episode. Now all of a sudden I'm fucking Zionist. I'll talk to, I talked to John Marco the other day. Now I'm fucking all pro-Palestine. Like whatever it is, I switch back and forth and then I do podcasts and people are like, you are. And I'm like, well, I'll tell you what I am. I'm an idiot, dude. I will switch, I will move like, but I do think that's what makes a comedian is somebody who can try on so many different perspectives. And it is hard that people are looking at. Comics like politicians.

• 1:11:21Joe Rogan?

  You're not an idiot, because both sides have points. That's why you can be swayed one way or the other.

• 1:11:27Speaker 01

  I'll double down.

• 1:11:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but I mean doubling down is just going down the rabbit hole of whatever that ideology believes. Cause like, they probably have a really good pitch. You know? And then, you know, if you talk to the socialists, they probably have a real good pitch.

• 1:11:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 1:11:40Joe Rogan?

  It's just.

• 1:11:40Speaker 01

  But I double down in a way that's like, I'll be like, this thing's fucking bad. And then the next day I'll be like, actually, it's pretty good. Like, I'll, I'll stop eating meat and being like, anybody who eats meat sucks. And then somebody be like, you wanna bite this burger? The ironer hit me and I'll be like, fuck cows, dude. Like, I go too hard in the paint on both sides. And I do, I remember.

• 1:11:58Joe Rogan?

  That's funny, though.

• 1:11:59Speaker 01

  I remember in college, these girls would bully me. And I remember being like, why don't you guys like me? And they were, they go, you just have too strong of convictions. And I was like, oh, interesting, cause I always thought that was a good thing. And I think for comedy, it is to be like, you get up on stage or you do a podcast and you go, what if I just try on this idea hardcore? And that's like an interesting thing to do as opposed to being like, oh, I see. This is kinda good and that's good too. You know, like, there is something about comedy just being like, what if this is the truth right now?

• 1:12:30Joe Rogan?

  That's an interesting thing to say to someone. You're too strong with your convictions.

• 1:12:34Speaker 01

  I'll never forget that. I will never forget the girl who said it.

• 1:12:37Joe Rogan?

  Did the girl give you an example?

• 1:12:39Speaker 01

  It was just, I would talk the way I talk where they'd be like, you know, I'd be like, women need to stop wearing dresses. High heels are ridiculous. Or I'd be like, men need to do this. Or women, you know, or I'd be like, or I'd be like, I'm gonna go ahead and say, diners need to go, you know, like whatever it was.

• 1:12:57Joe Rogan?

  Right, right, right.

• 1:12:58Speaker 01

  I would just, I'd be in or out on topics immediately.

• 1:13:01Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:13:01Speaker 01

  And they'd be like, you're just like too intense with your thoughts. And I'd be like, yeah, totally. Every, every, I mean, this is like why I would be bad in Nazi Germany. I mean, I hopefully would be okay, but I know I'd be somebody to be like, wait, no, wait, no. It's crazy.

• 1:13:17Joe Rogan?

  Well, I mean, there's a, there's gotta be some sort of a psychological reason why all those people went along with that. Right.

• 1:13:23Speaker 01

  There's, I mean, yeah, they went a lot. I think a lot of it was, yeah, I mean, I think a lot of it was just kind of dissociation, right?

• 1:13:32Joe Rogan?

  Well, there's a little bit of that, but then there's also, there's a tribal mentality that kicks in. Like, there's a default switch that happens to people.

• 1:13:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:13:41Joe Rogan?

  And in this country, you saw a lot of it during COVID. It was like the vaccinated people were hating on the unvaccinated. They should have their children taken away and like, put them into camps. Like, do you hear yourself? Do you hear yourself?

• 1:13:52Speaker 01

  It's so weird because it's such a different, like, I was with so many anti-vaxers, like, I was, they were, they're my friends. But I was like, oh, I'm getting vaccinated because number one thing that's important to me is comedy. I have no idea if the vaccine gave me long COVID, if COVID gave me long, whatever the fuck, but I just have to perform. That's, it, my health comes second.

• 1:14:10Joe Rogan?

  Did you get long COVID?

• 1:14:12Speaker 01

  Bro, my shit is fucked up. I can't, like, those Ubers that have those smelly trees, I have to get out of them. I get immediate migraines, like, because I, my smell is fucked up.

• 1:14:22Joe Rogan?

  Your smell's fucked up?

• 1:14:23Speaker 01

  Like, if you have deodorant that has, like, chemicals in it, it's rancid to me.

• 1:14:26Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 1:14:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, and so many people were, people were coming up to me.

• 1:14:29Joe Rogan?

  That's your long COVID? Do you just smell things?

• 1:14:31Speaker 01

  Smell, it's bad, though.

• 1:14:32Joe Rogan?

  I don't think you can call that long COVID. Long COVID, yeah, long COVID is people that are exhausted and they have, like, heart palpitations and, yeah.

• 1:14:40Speaker 01

  I got, I got a synapse off. I got a synapses off.

• 1:14:44Joe Rogan?

  You just got an upgrade in your nose.

• 1:14:46Speaker 01

  I.

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• 1:15:16Joe Rogan?

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• 1:16:00Joe Rogan?

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• 1:16:34Speaker 01

  Did get it up. Yeah, but it sucks, dude. If somebody's wearing cologne, I'm like, I gotta go.

• 1:16:38Joe Rogan?

  Perfect.

• 1:16:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:16:40Joe Rogan?

  I would take, you got a wolf nose.

• 1:16:41Speaker 01

  I got a wolf nose.

• 1:16:42Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's great. You gotta change the way you look at it.

• 1:16:45Speaker 01

  You're right.

• 1:16:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:47Speaker 01

  I thought I had long COVID, and then I stopped eating sugar. I thought I had the bad one, and then I stopped eating candy, and I was like, well, hello. It's crazy what I did.

• 1:16:57Joe Rogan?

  Candy wrecks your shit, isn't it nuts?

• 1:16:59Speaker 01

  And I was a whore, little candy slut.

• 1:17:02Joe Rogan?

  Ooh, little candy slut.

• 1:17:03Speaker 01

  I wasn't eating anything.

• 1:17:04Joe Rogan?

  What does it say? Long COVID can cause altered smell.

• 1:17:06Speaker 01

  There it is.

• 1:17:07Joe Rogan?

  Or parasomnia, where things smell distorted, foul, or different than they used to, even if the initial COVID-19 symptoms have passed. So did you get this after you got, like, when did this start happening? Did you get COVID?

• 1:17:20Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:17:21Joe Rogan?

  You got vaccinated.

• 1:17:22Speaker 01

  I got COVID like six times.

• 1:17:23Joe Rogan?

  Of course you did.

• 1:17:24Speaker 01

  I just had it recently.

• 1:17:25Joe Rogan?

  Because you got vaccinated. People who didn't get vaccinated got it once or twice.

• 1:17:28Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:17:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:17:31Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they fucked you. They fucked everybody. They fucked everybody with that goddamn stupid thing.

• 1:17:35Speaker 01

  I got it hard. See, I'll talk to you about this and then tomorrow, my liberal mom will be like, "The vaccine is good." And I'll be like, "Yes, mommy, I agree."

• 1:17:43Joe Rogan?

  It's a long conversation. It would take a long time to explain what was wrong. But it all boils down to the same thing that it always does, which is money. They distorted the facts, they distorted the research, they distorted the efficacy, they distorted what it was actually designed to do, just because they wanted money. That's it.

• 1:18:01Speaker 01

  Did we pay them for the vaccine?

• 1:18:03Joe Rogan?

  Oh, fuck, yeah. They made a shit ton of money. It might have been free for you.

• 1:18:08Speaker 01

  I like the idea of money, but aren't, weren't, isn't your camp in on like, um, control? Mind control? Not mind control, but knowing, knowing where we are, like anti-vax people?

• 1:18:18Joe Rogan?

  I'm not an anti-vax person.

• 1:18:19Speaker 01

  What are you?

• 1:18:20Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:18:21Speaker 01

  Give yourself a label.

• 1:18:22Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I believe that all medications should be subject to scrutiny. They should all go through rigorous, double-blind placebo-controlled trials to find out what the side effects are, what the efficacy rate is, what's the real facts behind it.

• 1:18:43Speaker 01

  Then they'll just lie about that.

• 1:18:44Joe Rogan?

  That's, but this is why. This is why.

• 1:18:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:18:47Joe Rogan?

  The problem is pharmaceutical drug companies do their own research. Not only do they do their own research, but they do their own research that they hide. So they'll do multiple studies that show no efficacy. And then they'll rig one study where they can show just like a little bit of improvement, and then they just sell it. And they start going with it. And they've done that before. They, they got sued because of Vioxx. Vioxx killed fifty, sixty thousand people and through internal emails, the pharmaceutical drug company was saying, "We're going to have these problems." And it listed all the different things that people wound up getting, including strokes. "We're gonna have these cardiovascular problems, cardiopulmonary problems." But whatever the, the wording was, I don't wanna like be quoted on it. But it will be good for us financially.

• 1:19:34Joe Rogan?

  We'll do well with this.

• 1:19:35Speaker 01

  It's in the email?

• 1:19:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, in the email, "We'll do well with this." It killed 50 to 60,000 people. A friend of mine got a stroke. He got on Vioxx because he had knee problems. It was an anti-inflammatory medication.

• 1:19:49Speaker 01

  Sometimes there's fishy shit like that. Like, sometimes I'll take Prozac from one place and from a different place, very different thing.

• 1:19:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, because it's from Mexico. It's got fentanyl in it.

• 1:19:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, some weird shit going on, yeah. What do you think about Ozempic?

• 1:20:01Joe Rogan?

  We talked about that the other day with a guy who runs a pharmacy. The problem with it is that when they're dosing it out to people, they're giving everyone the same dose. And it should be dependent upon, like, how much weight are you trying to lose? What is your body weight? You know, there's a bunch of different factors.

• 1:20:18Speaker 01

  Isn't it just that it holds on to poop?

• 1:20:20Joe Rogan?

  Well, it doesn't seem to be good for you.

• 1:20:23Speaker 01

  If poop is sitting in your body?

• 1:20:25Joe Rogan?

  Poop stays in your body a little longer and food digests slower. And it kills your appetite. But if you're morbidly obese and you might die from that, this is probably a good solution. So it's not a, it's like, don't throw out the baby with the bathwater. I don't want it, I don't need it. But if I did, if I was 600 pounds and I was in this, and then someone said, "Look, and I can give you this thing, it'll kill your appetite," like, fucking please, please.

• 1:20:49Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 1:20:50Joe Rogan?

  So it's beneficial for that. And then there's a problem with muscle loss and bone density loss. But my friend Brigham, who was on the other day, the episode's out now.

• 1:20:58Speaker 01

  Bone density, bro.

• 1:20:59Joe Rogan?

  He was saying that the issue is that they're giving him too much of a dose. And if you mix it with other peptides, you can actually eliminate those problems. So there's a way to dose it out for people that are, and you would just lose nothing but fat. It is possible to do. It just has to be done correctly. So he was explaining that.

• 1:21:16Speaker 01

  And right now, it's willy-nilly.

• 1:21:18Joe Rogan?

  Well, right now, everyone's just getting on it. Instead of just going to the gym, there's people that, like, need to lose 20 pounds. They're getting on Ozempic. Like, that's crazy. You can lose 20 pounds in a couple months.

• 1:21:28Speaker 01

  The thing that's frustrating is, because I used to be so fat. I used to have a type 2 diabetes and I got rid of it, which is crazy. And like, it's frustrating.

• 1:21:35Joe Rogan?

  And you are still eating all that sugar?

• 1:21:37Speaker 01

  Dude, well, that's the thing, is I can eat sugar exclusively, lose weight if I only eat the candy. Like, it was like this bizarre diet I would go on. And then I just had to like, switch my mind, but that mental switch of being like, this is not for fun. This food is not for fun. You've had your fun.

• 1:21:55Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:21:55Speaker 01

  Like, you did that. You did the candy, you did the pizza, you did all of that. Now, we're using food as like, the same way we use sleep. Where it's like, I feel better when I get eight hours, right?

• 1:22:04Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:22:04Speaker 01

  And once you do that switch, it's, it feels like things click into place. So with people on Ozempic, I'm like, if you could just get that turn of your brain, it would help so mu- if you could just... It, it does feel like a switch, where you're like...

• 1:22:18Joe Rogan?

  Right, but think about what you had to go through with acid to get off the OCD.

• 1:22:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, right, right.

• 1:22:22Joe Rogan?

  And now imagine you're 600 pounds and you've been eating candy for 35 years.

• 1:22:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:22:27Joe Rogan?

  That's, you know, it's a big switch. It's a battleship.

• 1:22:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:22:31Joe Rogan?

  You can't just fucking...

• 1:22:33Speaker 01

  I think recovery helps.

• 1:22:34Joe Rogan?

  You gotta turn that motherfucker around.

• 1:22:35Speaker 04

  Did you see a sugar diet going viral earlier this year?

• 1:22:38Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I know Mark Bell was really into that. Unlimited sugar, restricted protein, ever be a good thing? What is the good about it?

• 1:22:46Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:22:47Speaker 04

  Literally, I swear I was paying attention when he said, I was like, there's no way you're saying to see candy. It's not just candy, but...

• 1:22:52Joe Rogan?

  I thought he was fucking around.

• 1:22:53Speaker 04

  No, it's like fruit, but he's like, if candy's all you got, it's not the worst thing.

• 1:22:57Joe Rogan?

  But it's low protein, right?

• 1:22:59Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's like, a certain amount of protein. There's a video of him explaining it, if you wanna watch that.

• 1:23:02Joe Rogan?

  So he weighs 95 kilograms, which is, what is that, like, 225 pounds?

• 1:23:07Speaker 04

  Yeah, the video I just saw, he said he was like, 207, 210, he was gonna get under 200.

• 1:23:10Speaker 01

  Does he have a face? Can we see his face?

• 1:23:12Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he's a handsome guy. Good-looking guy. He's, but it doesn't work with him, cuz he's really fit, and he's been doing a bunch of different stuff his whole life.

• 1:23:20Speaker 01

  My face is fucked up on that shit.

• 1:23:21Joe Rogan?

  Carnivore diet for a long time. It's not...

• 1:23:24Speaker 01

  No dude, see the deep sunken lines, that's sugar.

• 1:23:28Joe Rogan?

  He's like 50 years old. No, this is the new thing. Like he's, he was always like this. This is what he looked like forever. And he used to be gigantic.

• 1:23:34Speaker 01

  You know what pisses me off? This was a woman, we'd be like, that's anorexia. Because when I told people I was only eating sugar, they were like, that's anorexia.

• 1:23:40Joe Rogan?

  Hold on, show, show what he looks like, Jamie. Show, go, go to his Instagram and wait, you see how fit this guy is. Like this guy is in tremendous shape.

• 1:23:49Speaker 01

  No protein? Oh, the veins are getting me.

• 1:23:52Joe Rogan?

  Well, he's always had those. But that's, that's my point. Like click on that one on the right hand side. Like look, that's what we're talking about. He's a big jacked dude. So for him to do this diet and say, you know, look, I've got this body. Well, bitch, you always had that body. Like, I don't know.

• 1:24:08Speaker 01

  No, I mean, I've gotten very skinny off the all sugar diet, but it has effects. Yeast infection all the time. Deep, dark circles.

• 1:24:17Joe Rogan?

  From sugar.

• 1:24:17Speaker 01

  From sugar. Fucks up your sleep.

• 1:24:20Joe Rogan?

  When did you stop with the sugar?

• 1:24:22Speaker 01

  Like two months ago?

• 1:24:23Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 1:24:24Speaker 01

  But I'm having ice cream today because my special came out. But we've been planning, we have been planning, we're going to Amy's Ice Cream and we're gonna have ice cream.

• 1:24:32Joe Rogan?

  It's a great spot.

• 1:24:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I've been off sugar. It just helps a lot. I've just been doing fats and like stuff like that, which is great. And I can eat as much as, it used to be like I had to, everything I ate, I had to do a tiny amount. And now it's like, I can eat as many eggs and avocado.

• 1:24:45Joe Rogan?

  Isn't that nuts?

• 1:24:46Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 1:24:47Joe Rogan?

  It doesn't even seem like it's real.

• 1:24:48Speaker 01

  I know.

• 1:24:49Joe Rogan?

  All you, if you just ate nothing but steak, you would lose weight. And everyone's like, no way. Like, yeah. Because your body would regulate correctly. When you're done, you're done. Like if you, if you sit down, you have a 16 ounce steak. If you really only need 12 ounces, after 12 ounces, you'll stop eating.

• 1:25:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:25:05Joe Rogan?

  That's all you're eating. But if you have mashed potatoes there, and then a bowl of pasta, and then an ice cream, and then a cake.

• 1:25:10Speaker 01

  Yeah. Try eating cake after you ate a whole avocado. You're like, bleh, I'm good. Like you don't, the fat gets you. It's so crazy.

• 1:25:17Joe Rogan?

  The, also your, your gut biome switches. And your gut biome doesn't crave sugar anymore. It's that candida.

• 1:25:25Speaker 01

  The candida is what I did, the candida diet. Because every time I got my period, I had a yeast infection. And then it was just, I was itchy. And I was like, what's going on? And I was like, I had brain fog and I chachi betted and it was like, oh, you're riddled with candida. And I was like, oh, I'll try the diet. And then I immediately started thinking faster and was not itchy at all.

• 1:25:43Joe Rogan?

  Isn't that bizarre that your gut biome has an effect on your personality?

• 1:25:47Speaker 01

  It's fucked up.

• 1:25:48Joe Rogan?

  It's fucked up.

• 1:25:48Speaker 01

  It's fucked up.

• 1:25:49Joe Rogan?

  Well, we are, we are a literal ecosystem. We wanna think of ourselves as a person. But we're really like, a life form that houses life forms.

• 1:25:58Speaker 01

  Yeah. It's, I think it's because they, our control panel is up here, makes us think that we're this like unit

• 1:26:05Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:05Speaker 01

  that we can fuck with. Like, I think if our eyes were here, we would maybe be like, this is a whole collective system, but this fucks us up. Like, I was watching this fat, huge, tall guy eat an ice cream cone the other day, and his arm was like this, and he was like six, seven, he was just licking it. And I was like, it looks like this little man is eating this ice cream cone unbeknownst to this giant body down below. Like, it looks like this little guy's just riding this big guy. And I think that, if we could just slide this fucker down.

• 1:26:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, body awareness of what you are as a whole. But it's also, a lot of people don't do anything with their bodies. So their body is just like a truck that they drive around in.

• 1:26:40Speaker 01

  Right. And we do have a mouth. I have a vagina, which is a mouth. You know what I mean? We have the fucking Moore face down there. There's cra- the uterus is a fucking another head, and the gut and everything. We just don't have eyeballs there, so we forget about it completely.

• 1:26:51Joe Rogan?

  Really? It's a head?

• 1:26:53Speaker 01

  I think so, yeah. It's a fucking whole thinking thing. Your gut is fricking, all these brains.

• 1:26:57Joe Rogan?

  It's definitely thinking. Your heart thinks too. There's neurons in your heart.

• 1:27:00Speaker 01

  But the serotonin in the gut and the brain and stuff. It feels pretty balanced, it's just the eyeballs fuck us up.

• 1:27:06Joe Rogan?

  Well, if we could have an understanding that you're an actual system, it would be a lot better for people. Because so many people just think like, oh, I don't wanna worry about my body, I'm worrying about my brain. Like, they think it's almost like vain to think about your body, and vain is stupid.

• 1:27:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:21Joe Rogan?

  It's okay, but there's no virtue in being a weak piece of shit. Like, that's not good for you.

• 1:27:26Speaker 01

  Yeah. And it just impacts your brain.

• 1:27:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's not intelligent to not take care of your body, stupid.

• 1:27:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's crazy. It is, yeah. And the second I start, I stop working out, it is so weird how much pent up energy. And then I'm like lethargic, and then I have to eat sugar, and it all gets fucking crazy.

• 1:27:41Joe Rogan?

  Also, you start getting anxiety. You're like, oh. Start freaking.

• 1:27:45Speaker 01

  Anytime I participate in self deception in any way, it bleeds into everything. Like anytime I'm neglecting some part of my life, you can like smell it on me. The second I walk in, I'm like, hey, sorry, I didn't, I shouldn't be, you know? And I have this whole air and it's like, I just needed to do my dishes. I would have been fine.

• 1:28:02Joe Rogan?

  That's Miyamoto Musashi.

• 1:28:04Speaker 01

  Oh, that's the sword.

• 1:28:05Joe Rogan?

  So like literally, that's, that's his book is like, you have to be balanced. You have to balance everything.

• 1:28:10Speaker 01

  That's good. But then sometimes, don't you go sicko mode where you go, fuck it?

• 1:28:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, kinda, but not for long periods of time.

• 1:28:18Speaker 01

  Do you drink?

• 1:28:19Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but I don't. I haven't drank in a long time, but I will.

• 1:28:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:28:23Joe Rogan?

  Like I'll have a glass of wine, but it's been like, it was many months before I had anything. And then I had like a margarita and I was like, okay.

• 1:28:32Speaker 01

  And you felt?

• 1:28:33Joe Rogan?

  Nothing. I mean, I didn't do it because I was an alcoholic. I did it because it's bad for you. I was like, why am I doing this? Cause I, I drink at my club. I'll have a couple of drinks at the club, a couple of nights a week. And then I'll go out with my wife, have a drink or two. And then maybe I'll do a podcast with someone who wants to have a drink. And so we'll have like a little whiskey, clink glasses and we're talking, get a little tipsy. After a while, you're like, you're poisoning yourself.

• 1:29:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:29:00Joe Rogan?

  You're drinking seven, 10, 15, 15 drinks in a week.

• 1:29:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:29:05Joe Rogan?

  Like, that's not good. And then I stopped and I was like, oh my God, I feel so much better. And then I felt stupid. I felt stupid for not doing it.

• 1:29:13Speaker 01

  I did the same thing. I'm a sugar addict and a love addict. I'm not an alcoholic, but I was like, I can't, I can't be having extra sugar where I'm not, where I don't need it. Cause I'm eating so much candy.

• 1:29:24Joe Rogan?

  So you got off the alcohol because of the sugar?

• 1:29:26Speaker 01

  I had to choose. I was like, it's Swedish fish or alcohol. I had, I had to make the decision and I was puffy all the time. I couldn't stand the little puff.

• 1:29:33Joe Rogan?

  That's not good either. Yeah, the puffy's bad.

• 1:29:35Speaker 01

  And then you have a glass of wine because you're like, I can treat. And I'd be like, just like fully retarded.

• 1:29:40Joe Rogan?

  Instantly, right?

• 1:29:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:29:41Joe Rogan?

  Cause your body's not used to it.

• 1:29:42Speaker 01

  Yeah. And so I was like, well, this isn't that fun either. So I'll just not do it.

• 1:29:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I think a lot of people more now than I think ever before are abstaining from alcohol. There was just a study recently about young people, about alcohol consumption in young people is down by, what was the number? So I think it's something crazy, like 25%.

• 1:30:02Speaker 01

  Well, it's because they're not having sex.

• 1:30:03Joe Rogan?

  Is that what it is?

• 1:30:04Speaker 01

  I mean, Gen Z, I need to touch this.

• 1:30:06Joe Rogan?

  Need to touch that. That's a Harland Williams snake.

• 1:30:09Speaker 01

  I love Harland Williams so much.

• 1:30:11Joe Rogan?

  I love him too. It was on the table when Trump was here and he got so happy at his snake. So he had that snake in his pants the entire time. He was doing a podcast and he told me that he got a tapeworm. And then he named his tapeworm Dmitri. And I'm like, you have a worm? Yeah, I got a worm. I picked it up. Like, it just, you know, it was a gag.

• 1:30:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:30:29Joe Rogan?

  And at the end, he pulled, he's like, ah, the worm's coming out. And like, ah, it reaches in his chest.

• 1:30:34Speaker 01

  He had it the whole time?

• 1:30:35Joe Rogan?

  The whole time. He pulls out this fucking snake and he puts it on the table and it's been there ever since. So when I had Trump on the podcast, he was so happy that Dmitri, the snake, was on the table.

• 1:30:44Speaker 01

  His pants, his little snake pants. That's awesome. That's such a, look at this. That's, I love Harland. Dude, Harland was talking to us about Rocketman and how they didn't put out Rocketman because there's a song in it where he imitates being Chinese. Like, he does it with everybody. He does it with German where he's like, I la la la le ben in the world. And then he does a Chinese accent where he's like, ta chang chang chang, right?

• 1:31:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:31:10Speaker 01

  And they just like buried it. Like, that came out with Tarzan. And they buried the shit out of Rocketman and let Tarzan like take the, and I was like, I looked it up. Tarzan is like based off seriously racist original story.

• 1:31:26Joe Rogan?

  Was it really?

• 1:31:27Speaker 01

  Yeah. Which is so interesting. Like Rocketman-

• 1:31:29Joe Rogan?

  Edgar Rice Burroughs? The original Tarzan?

• 1:31:32Speaker 01

  Um, was it Tar-

• 1:31:33Joe Rogan?

  Was that Edgar Rice Burroughs?

• 1:31:37Speaker 01

  Is Tarzan the one where it's like, M O B? Yeah, yeah. Tarzan, look up Tarzan racist ties. It is there.

• 1:31:43Joe Rogan?

  So from the original book?

• 1:31:44Speaker 01

  I think so, yeah. Like, the original, original.

• 1:31:47Joe Rogan?

  Well, it was old. It was an old story.

• 1:31:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:50Joe Rogan?

  A white guy who lives with the chimpanzees and figures it out. He lives with the apes, becomes the king, of course.

• 1:31:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I think even before then, it was more racist. I mean, this was a Google. This could have been one of the things where-

• 1:32:01Joe Rogan?

  I don't think I've ever read it. I think I've read the comic books. I've seen the movies. I don't think I've ever read Tarzan, the Edgar Rice Burroughs novel.

• 1:32:09Speaker 01

  No, I haven't read that either. I think this was pre-that, though. But this could have been me Googling and finding it and being like, see? But Rocketman getting buried, Rocketman's so good. And if I had seen that as a kid, I would have been so stoked.

• 1:32:21Joe Rogan?

  So it's one of Harland's comedies?

• 1:32:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, his first.

• 1:32:25Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 1:32:25Speaker 01

  So it's his first movie, and he's so goofy in it, but he does all these voices for different nationalities. And at one point, he does Chinese. And it's such a funny scene.

• 1:32:34Joe Rogan?

  Nineteen ninety-seven?

• 1:32:36Speaker 01

  Yeah. Did you find?

• 1:32:39Joe Rogan?

  I don't think even that I knew about that movie.

• 1:32:41Speaker 01

  It's, I didn't know about it either, but we had Harland on the pod, and Ian was like, I'm obsessed with this movie. So then me and Ian watched it, and it's like, the best. It's like exactly what you want your kid to see. It's like a doofus who makes it as an astronaut. Because he's smart in his own.

• 1:32:55Joe Rogan?

  But they fucked up with the Chinese thing, huh? Was the one accent that you can't make fun of?

• 1:32:59Speaker 01

  One accent. He did all the other accents.

• 1:33:01Joe Rogan?

  So weird.

• 1:33:02Speaker 01

  I, I don't get that. Why is that the one?

• 1:33:05Joe Rogan?

  Ah, we live in a bizarro time.

• 1:33:07Speaker 01

  It's very weird.

• 1:33:08Joe Rogan?

  Very weird time.

• 1:33:09Speaker 01

  It's also funny because Disney was like, yeah, the scene goes in, we approve it. And then, and then they were like, wait, actually, it's not, that's fucked up.

• 1:33:17Joe Rogan?

  Well, you know, people approve dumb shit all the time.

• 1:33:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:33:20Joe Rogan?

  Fear Factor, they approve people drinking come. And that's what got the showcase.

• 1:33:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, dude, I was obsessed with.

• 1:33:27Joe Rogan?

  And piss.

• 1:33:28Speaker 01

  I was about to say, did you ever watch it again? I'm like, you're on it. But those people do not. I used to think they were like hot people. They're like trash, a little trashy. Like, growing up, when I was watching it, I was like, oh, my God, I want to grow up to look like her. And then I look back, and I'm like, this is white dreads, crazy lunatics. I was obsessed with that show.

• 1:33:46Joe Rogan?

  Well, they made them drink come.

• 1:33:48Speaker 01

  But is, wasn't it bowl come?

• 1:33:49Joe Rogan?

  It was donkey.

• 1:33:50Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, donkey.

• 1:33:51Joe Rogan?

  Donkey come and donkey urine. They had to play horseshoes to see how much donkey come and donkey urine.

• 1:33:57Speaker 01

  Did they say come?

• 1:33:58Joe Rogan?

  Oh, uh, sperm. I think we said sperm.

• 1:34:01Speaker 01

  No, why? And they aired it?

• 1:34:04Joe Rogan?

  Well, not really. See, that's what got the show canceled. Imagine drinking the cum and not having your episode aired. I know. Well, people drank the cum and didn't win. The cum is not a problem for me. I would've drank the cum. The urine would be more of a problem? Urine, fine. For me, it was the spiders in the mouth. The gals chose the urine over the cum. Or the cum, rather, over the urine. Oh, yeah, okay, okay. Would rather. Hilarious to think it's gay to swallow. Donkey Juice. The episode's called Donkey Juice. But I don't know if that's really what it's called. See, the thing is, it never aired. I think Donkey Juice was like the internal name for the episode, or the stunt. But, uh, so it did air in other countries, though. That's why you can still watch it on YouTube. Because it aired in, I think it aired Denmark or some shit. They had to just jerk off a bunch of donkeys? No, no.

• 1:34:50Joe Rogan?

  How did they get the cum? I used to, I had a bit about it in my act. They take a cattle prod and they shove it up the donkey's ass. And they shock their prostate. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And they just bust. They love that shit. Yeah. That's cr- that is donkey rape. It's more than that. Yeah. It's kind of alien. You're an a- you're a-. For a show? Aducting this donkey and forcing it to come. That's brutal. I know. With electroshock.

• 1:35:23Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my god. And then, you know, they got like a... This episode is brought to you by NOCO. You're miles from home, you turn the key, nothing. Dead battery. Normally, that means finding another car, someone willing to give you a jump, and dealing with old jumper cables. But what if you didn't need any of that? Keep a NOCO portable jump starter in your glove box and jump start your car yourself. No cables, no second vehicle, no waiting for help. It also works as a power bank and has a built-in LED flashlight. NOCO, the end of jumper cables. Use code ROGEN10 for 10% off select jump starters at N-O dot C-O. This episode is brought to you by Tacovus.

• 1:36:07Joe Rogan?

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• 1:36:49Joe Rogan?

  That's T E C O V A S dot com. And right now, get 10% off at tecovas.com/rogan when you sign up for email and texts. The tube in the end where they're collecting it all.

• 1:37:03Speaker 01

  For a show, that's so crazy.

• 1:37:05Joe Rogan?

  We had buckets of it.

• 1:37:06Speaker 01

  And the donkey doesn't even get paid.

• 1:37:08Joe Rogan?

  How many donkeys got jacked off? Cause there was buckets of it, look.

• 1:37:11Speaker 01

  No, no.

• 1:37:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, oh yeah.

• 1:37:13Speaker 01

  You know what, I always assumed that was fake.

• 1:37:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh no, it was super real.

• 1:37:16Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:37:17Joe Rogan?

  Hundred percent, yeah.

• 1:37:18Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 1:37:19Joe Rogan?

  There's laws, like, there's laws, which was really good because like people say, how do I get on Fear Factor? Like, if you've ever met me, you can't get on the show, so you can't talk to me about it. If you want to get on the show, you can't talk to me right now.

• 1:37:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:37:30Joe Rogan?

  And it will like get me out of conversation.

• 1:37:31Speaker 01

  That's good.

• 1:37:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, nice.

• 1:37:33Speaker 01

  That's really good.

• 1:37:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, cause I can't help anybody get on the show. But there's laws, like you can't say it's donkey cum when it's not donkey cum. It is cum, you're drinking cum. Yeah, otherwise your, your show's not a game show anymore.

• 1:37:46Speaker 01

  How'd they get all that stuff, all the worms? So many worms.

• 1:37:49Joe Rogan?

  Farms, worm farms.

• 1:37:51Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, for bait and stuff.

• 1:37:53Joe Rogan?

  And then cockroach farms where the people that eat cockroaches, you had to put them on a specific diet for X amount of time before they're allowed to be consumed by people. Yeah, you can't just have them eating garbage and rotten meat.

• 1:38:06Speaker 01

  And the spiders in the mouth where they were climbing out? That was the one that me and my sister would watch to torture ourselves. Where they were, couldn't get the spider in the mouth because it was climbing out?

• 1:38:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it was brutal. Ridiculous show. I literally signed up for it because I thought it was gonna be canceled immediately and I'd have a lot of material.

• 1:38:21Speaker 01

  Were you able to tell jokes on it?

• 1:38:24Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:38:24Speaker 01

  No, they limited the shit out of you?

• 1:38:26Joe Rogan?

  No, they, they, if, if I said something that they thought was controversial, most of the time they would edit it out.

• 1:38:33Speaker 01

  Did Jackass come, Jackass was after Fear Factor?

• 1:38:35Joe Rogan?

  No, I think it was before.

• 1:38:37Speaker 04

  During, I guess.

• 1:38:38Joe Rogan?

  Was it?

• 1:38:39Speaker 04

  I think so.

• 1:38:40Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 1:38:40Speaker 01

  I was obsessed with.

• 1:38:41Joe Rogan?

  The first one was Survivor. Survivor was the first one on TV.

• 1:38:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:38:44Joe Rogan?

  Where you're like, yo, which is still on the air, which is crazy.

• 1:38:48Speaker 01

  That is good. I thought the Osbournes.

• 1:38:50Joe Rogan?

  Well, that was a reality show. There, there was ones before that, right? There was Totally Polly. That was kind of a reality show.

• 1:38:56Speaker 01

  Okay, okay.

• 1:38:57Joe Rogan?

  You know, but.

• 1:38:58Speaker 01

  Totally Polly? Was that probably a show?

• 1:38:59Joe Rogan?

  Oh, sure. Yeah. He had a, he had like a very famous MTV reality show. Called Totally Polly.

• 1:39:05Speaker 01

  Where he just fucked around?

• 1:39:06Joe Rogan?

  Just traveled around, met people.

• 1:39:08Speaker 01

  That's cool.

• 1:39:09Joe Rogan?

  It's a reality show. Um, but like, the, I'm not wrong, right? Wasn't Survivor the first one of those kind of shows?

• 1:39:16Speaker 04

  A game show?

• 1:39:17Joe Rogan?

  No, you know, like a game show, but a reality show. Reality game show.

• 1:39:21Speaker 04

  I think so. I mean, it definitely caught, there was that wave. That came out around the same year as like American Idol.

• 1:39:27Joe Rogan?

  What year did Survivor start?

• 1:39:28Speaker 04

  I think it's like ninety, shit, I was in high school, I'll check, was it like two thousand ish, ninety nine, two thousand?

• 1:39:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. So Survivor was the first one.

• 1:39:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:39:37Joe Rogan?

  That was, that was the big one. I just can't believe it's still on the air. That's nuts.

• 1:39:40Speaker 01

  Was Fear Factor?

• 1:39:41Speaker 04

  Two thousand.

• 1:39:42Joe Rogan?

  Two thousand?

• 1:39:43Speaker 04

  May thirty first, two thousand.

• 1:39:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, so it was only like a year before Fear Factor, cause Fear Factor started in two thousand and one. They're gonna do a new one now. That, who the hell's hosting it?

• 1:39:52Speaker 01

  Wait.

• 1:39:53Joe Rogan?

  Johnny Knoxville?

• 1:39:54Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:39:55Speaker 01

  Survivor?

• 1:39:55Joe Rogan?

  Comes full circle. No, Fear Factor. I think there's a new Fear Factor that Johnny Knoxville's gonna host.

• 1:40:01Speaker 01

  That's awesome.

• 1:40:02Joe Rogan?

  So it all comes full circle.

• 1:40:03Speaker 01

  And you hated it?

• 1:40:04Joe Rogan?

  No, no, I didn't hate it. It's just like, it was a job.

• 1:40:09Speaker 01

  You were really sweet to the people.

• 1:40:11Joe Rogan?

  I was trying to be.

• 1:40:11Speaker 01

  You were very nice to them.

• 1:40:13Joe Rogan?

  I tried to be nice.

• 1:40:14Speaker 01

  I remember being like, that's a comforting, you'd be a good acid person to trip acid. You know what I mean?

• 1:40:18Joe Rogan?

  Consider.

• 1:40:19Speaker 01

  Maybe that's how, maybe that's how you got good at, I mean, that's, I mean, that's a fucked up trip to be like, you're gonna put these fucking things in your mouth.

• 1:40:26Joe Rogan?

  There's that, but I would also. Some people would be scared to do a stunt and I'd be like, look.

• 1:40:32Speaker 01

  We have to make money.

• 1:40:33Joe Rogan?

  You 100% can do this. It's just like, you know, people that have never really completely challenged themselves are not sure of where their boundaries lie and they get really scared.

• 1:40:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:40:42Joe Rogan?

  When something new and crazy is about to happen and they get overwhelmed by anxiety and you can get them and go, hey, hey, hey, listen to me. You know that voice in your head telling you not to do this?

• 1:40:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:40:53Joe Rogan?

  Fuck that voice. You can do this and when you get done, you're gonna be so happy. You're gonna be so happy. But you just have to do it. It's not gonna be nearly as bad as you think it is. Just force yourself to do it and you could do it.

• 1:41:04Speaker 01

  And they would do it?

• 1:41:05Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's cause like I, when I was a kid, from the time I was like 15 years old, I was teaching martial arts. So I am used to coaching people. I would bring people to tournaments and people that were scared and they were gonna have to fight and compete and I would coach them.

• 1:41:20Speaker 01

  In the corner?

• 1:41:21Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:41:23Speaker 01

  I just went to the Serrano Katie Taylor.

• 1:41:25Joe Rogan?

  Oh, did you really? That's a great fight.

• 1:41:27Speaker 01

  Dude, I have, can I say I am straight as they come?

• 1:41:30Joe Rogan?

  But?

• 1:41:30Speaker 01

  Katie Taylor, man.

• 1:41:32Joe Rogan?

  You'd get some of that?

• 1:41:32Speaker 01

  Dude, I just think she's the most attractive woman.

• 1:41:35Joe Rogan?

  Hmm.

• 1:41:36Speaker 01

  The way she goes, and I fight for the Lord and she's like, dude, when they're all fucking brain fucked afterwards and she's like, I just wanna go ahead and thank everybody for coming and I've been number one. And you're like, nobody knows what you're saying.

• 1:41:48Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:41:48Speaker 01

  The brain damage though is crazy. I box and I am not.

• 1:41:52Joe Rogan?

  You still box?

• 1:41:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, I box, but I don't, I mean, I, when my trainer is in town, but even sparring, I'm like, we gotta do this occasionally, cause I'm fucking fucked up afterwards.

• 1:42:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I have friends that still spar. I'm like, stop doing that.

• 1:42:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, a lot of people aren't sparring at all. They just fight.

• 1:42:08Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's rare. Most fighters spar. There's a few that don't, like Max Holloway for a while wasn't sparring, cause he was trying to preserve himself for fights, but then when he had to fight Dustin, or when he had Justin Gagey, I think it was, with Justin Gagey, he's like, I gotta start sparring again because I'm gonna fight someone who's really dangerous. You can't have any.

• 1:42:28Speaker 01

  It's just so, when you start, when I started boxing, I was like, I'm never gonna spar. That's crazy. And then like a month in, I was like so addicted and it was so much fun. It felt like you were training so that you could spar.

• 1:42:40Joe Rogan?

  It is fun to do.

• 1:42:41Speaker 01

  And then I would do a podcast and be like, and I'd be like.

• 1:42:46Speaker 01

  Oh, we can't do that. We can't do that. And you listen to Serrano and Katie when they're like fighting in those like press conferences? And it sounds like two drunk kids. Like they're like, no, she fucking said that we were gonna, and you're like, this is, I cannot be doing that.

• 1:43:01Joe Rogan?

  Well, the real rough one is when you talk to guys that are in like their 50s. And they've been retired for years and they're slurring their words. You barely understand what they're saying. You're like, fuck.

• 1:43:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, and they have so much money, but what do they?

• 1:43:14Joe Rogan?

  Well, some of them don't even have the money anymore. Usually they go through a few divorces because they're crazy. And no one can stay with them. They're out of their fucking mind.

• 1:43:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:43:22Joe Rogan?

  You know, and they're probably alcoholics because their brain's completely shattered.

• 1:43:26Speaker 01

  Yeah. Do they get, do men get more aggressive? When they get brain damage?

• 1:43:31Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they definitely can. It depends entirely on the individual.

• 1:43:35Speaker 01

  But do women get CTE?

• 1:43:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. 100%. Yeah, they can get aggressive too.

• 1:43:39Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:43:39Joe Rogan?

  They get, they get real impulsive, men and women that have brain damage. They get impulsive, they can't control their instincts, their impulses rather. They have addiction problems because they feel off, right? So they want to drink alcohol to get, to calm down or do cocaine. A lot of them wind up doing coke.

• 1:43:58Speaker 01

  To feel up because they're fried.

• 1:44:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, just you're fried. Your brain's cooked. Your endocrine system's all fucked up. Your pituitary gland's been bouncing around inside your fucking skull.

• 1:44:07Speaker 01

  Is your brain fucked?

• 1:44:08Joe Rogan?

  Probably a little bit, but like just the right amount.

• 1:44:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:44:11Joe Rogan?

  Just the right amount.

• 1:44:12Speaker 01

  When did you stop?

• 1:44:13Joe Rogan?

  Well, I stopped fighting when I was 22, I think was my last fights. And I stopped sparring when I was like 27 or 28.

• 1:44:22Speaker 01

  Oh, good. So you had the gummy kid brain.

• 1:44:23Joe Rogan?

  I did a little bit of sparring later when I was in my 30s.

• 1:44:27Speaker 01

  Do you do jiu-jitsu?

• 1:44:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:28Speaker 01

  Do you grapple with people?

• 1:44:29Joe Rogan?

  But, yeah, but that, the, the brain damage you get from that is rare. It's not.

• 1:44:34Speaker 01

  Maybe I should do that. My mom always tells me that.

• 1:44:36Joe Rogan?

  Kim Cogan does it. Ask her about it.

• 1:44:38Speaker 01

  Okay. I just, the boxing, the hitting.

• 1:44:40Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, don't do that.

• 1:44:41Speaker 01

  But I like, but even just training with mitts.

• 1:44:44Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:44:45Speaker 01

  I have such a rage issue that beating the shit out of something feels, even when I go to the gym and just beat the shit out of the bag, I feel so much better.

• 1:44:50Joe Rogan?

  It's super good for you. There's nothing better to like relieve stress than hitting the bag. It's the best. Don't stop doing that. I mean, definitely keep hitting pads, but don't get any brain damage.

• 1:44:59Speaker 01

  You know what I'm worried about jiu-jitsu?

• 1:45:00Joe Rogan?

  What?

• 1:45:00Speaker 01

  The fainting. Because it's these little-

• 1:45:02Joe Rogan?

  Because you're gonna get choked out. You're just gonna blackout the moment someone even comes close to choking you out.

• 1:45:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, if anybody does something to my wrist, I'm getting, no. Any artery touching-

• 1:45:13Joe Rogan?

  Stuck in a triangle, you're just gonna fall asleep and some chick's laughing.

• 1:45:15Speaker 01

  I did a good job, yeah.

• 1:45:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally. Because I have friends that do it and they're like, "Yeah, and then my bone was up against mine." I'm like, "I'm done, do not, no."

• 1:45:25Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, talk to Kim. It is rough, but it's super addictive. Once you do it and you get used to it, it's very addictive.

• 1:45:32Speaker 01

  It's addictive because it's a puzzle?

• 1:45:34Joe Rogan?

  It's a game, yeah, you're playing a game. And you get better at the game the more you play it.

• 1:45:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:45:38Joe Rogan?

  And, you know, the game is get somebody in an arm bar.

• 1:45:40Speaker 01

  Right, but the arm bar is, all of it is slightly representing breaking them, right?

• 1:45:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:45:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, that makes me not-

• 1:45:46Joe Rogan?

  You have to tap.

• 1:45:47Speaker 01

  No, God.

• 1:45:48Joe Rogan?

  You have to tap so your arm doesn't get broke.

• 1:45:49Speaker 01

  The idea of overextending somebody's body part is brutal.

• 1:45:53Joe Rogan?

  It is brutal.

• 1:45:54Speaker 01

  That's so gross.

• 1:45:56Joe Rogan?

  It's gross.

• 1:45:57Speaker 01

  But it's ver- but I think that that would-

• 1:45:58Joe Rogan?

  It's a useful skill, very useful skill.

• 1:46:01Speaker 01

  But the boxing is just bam, you know?

• 1:46:03Joe Rogan?

  That's useful too.

• 1:46:03Speaker 01

  Breaking somebody's nose I could do, but, ugh.

• 1:46:06Joe Rogan?

  You couldn't break their arm?

• 1:46:07Speaker 01

  I could not, no, the idea of like bone coming through, crazy.

• 1:46:11Joe Rogan?

  Oh, just choke them, put them to sleep.

• 1:46:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, have you put, you've put a lot of people to sleep?

• 1:46:15Joe Rogan?

  Not a lot of people.

• 1:46:17Speaker 01

  Is it a good feeling to be put to sleep?

• 1:46:18Joe Rogan?

  I don't know.

• 1:46:20Speaker 01

  You've never been put to sleep?

• 1:46:20Joe Rogan?

  No, I've never been put to sleep, no.

• 1:46:22Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:46:22Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:46:23Speaker 01

  Are you scared to be put to sleep?

• 1:46:24Joe Rogan?

  No, no, I just tap when I know I'm about to go out.

• 1:46:28Speaker 01

  Right, right, right, right, your body probably taps.

• 1:46:30Joe Rogan?

  No, you tap.

• 1:46:31Speaker 01

  I know, but you probably, your instinct, like even if you're like, "Put me to sleep," you'd still probably be like, "No, actually, no."

• 1:46:36Joe Rogan?

  No, you gotta know like when you're going, right? So like if you're getting choked, if like someone's got my back and they've got a choke in, there's a point in time where I know I'm not getting out of this, you just tap. It's smart. It's stupid to fight it off because you get injured. And then you wind up being really fucked up.

• 1:46:53Speaker 01

  I love watching MMA.

• 1:46:54Joe Rogan?

  Do you?

• 1:46:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, when they jump on their backs like that, when they go full monkey style, it's like, yes, dude.

• 1:47:00Joe Rogan?

  Have you ever been to it live?

• 1:47:01Speaker 01

  No, just that fight. It was a big deal, I went, Netflix took me thinking of it.

• 1:47:05Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, but that's a boxing match. You should go to a UFC live, it's bananas.

• 1:47:09Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:47:09Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's bananas, it's, yeah.

• 1:47:12Speaker 01

  I loved going to the Serrano match.

• 1:47:14Joe Rogan?

  Are you at the club this weekend?

• 1:47:16Speaker 01

  Who's at the, no, I'm in Rochester this weekend.

• 1:47:18Joe Rogan?

  Oh, cool. There's a UFC, I was gonna say there's UFC in San Antonio on Saturday night.

• 1:47:24Speaker 01

  I'll go in New York for sure, whenever it's.

• 1:47:26Joe Rogan?

  When it's in New York? Okay, I'll get you tickets. It's gonna be in Madison Square Garden in November.

• 1:47:31Speaker 01

  I'll go.

• 1:47:32Joe Rogan?

  If you're gonna be around, okay.

• 1:47:33Speaker 01

  I'll be so sick. Oh my god, I'm gonna wear a fur coat.

• 1:47:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you'll love it. It's, and seeing it in the Garden is kinda special.

• 1:47:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, where was, oh, they were in the Garden, Toronto. No, yes, they were in the Garden.

• 1:47:45Joe Rogan?

  Were they?

• 1:47:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:47:46Joe Rogan?

  The big room or the smaller room?

• 1:47:48Speaker 01

  Big. Sold it out. Toronto made fourteen mil or some, I mean, they made, I know.

• 1:47:53Joe Rogan?

  That's great.

• 1:47:54Speaker 01

  Isn't that great?

• 1:47:54Joe Rogan?

  That's awesome, yeah.

• 1:47:56Speaker 01

  And the fucking, the card was incredible, watching them.

• 1:48:00Joe Rogan?

  Madison Square Garden has got a lot of energy in that room, too. There's something crazy about that room.

• 1:48:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:48:05Joe Rogan?

  It's just like the amount of concerts and fights and events that have taken place, and that you feel it in the building when you walk in, you're like, you walk in, you're like, whoa.

• 1:48:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's intense.

• 1:48:15Joe Rogan?

  This place is alive.

• 1:48:17Speaker 01

  It's awesome.

• 1:48:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, like when you go to a new arena and they're brand new and you walk in the door and it's empty and you're wandering around like, wow, cool place. But you walk in the garden, you're like, yo, this place is alive. It's got memories in here.

• 1:48:30Speaker 01

  The other ones feel like racquetball, like you could, you know what I mean? Like you could hit a racquetball around in one. It's like they're, the stage, cause I've done arenas with Tom Bunch, Segura, and you can definitely feel the ones that have like been there versus the ones that they put up recently.

• 1:48:43Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, they have history. History is burned into buildings.

• 1:48:48Speaker 01

  I'm so bad at rotating.

• 1:48:49Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it's weird.

• 1:48:50Speaker 01

  It's so weird.

• 1:48:51Joe Rogan?

  It's the best way, though, because it's the only way you can do an arena where it's intimate. So what we're talking about is a stage that's round.

• 1:48:58Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, in the round.

• 1:48:59Joe Rogan?

  In the round, yeah.

• 1:49:00Speaker 01

  Tom was like, just say a joke then pivot, just, every time I get up there and I'd be like, here's my joke, I'm gonna turn to these people now and I would turn every single time.

• 1:49:09Joe Rogan?

  That's funny, though.

• 1:49:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was totally great, but I couldn't do the like natural rotation.

• 1:49:14Joe Rogan?

  The good thing about it is, though, it makes the show intimate even though there's sixteen thousand people there.

• 1:49:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:49:20Joe Rogan?

  Because there's people on this side facing people on the other side. So everybody realizes they're all in it together.

• 1:49:25Speaker 01

  And the Jumbotron. I mean, my Netflix special is shot, I was like, wherever your camera is, shove it the fuck up my nose. Like, I'm so sick of seeing specials where I'm watching their whole body the whole time, like, show my face, cause my facial movements are like half of my joke.

• 1:49:40Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:49:41Speaker 01

  And in the arena, you get that. Like, I remember watching Louis. At the Hulu, at the Hulu theater. And it was just the fucking jumbotrons. You saw every little movement he was making.

• 1:49:52Joe Rogan?

  Mmm.

• 1:49:53Speaker 01

  And I was like, that's so sick. Because it's so, in a club, you see that.

• 1:49:57Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:49:57Speaker 01

  You know?

• 1:49:57Joe Rogan?

  And that's what you want to see. Especially if you're looking at it on the screen, which is weird.

• 1:50:01Speaker 01

  Yeah. And then sometimes you watch somebody and you're like, I should just have gone home and watched this. Because then I would see their face.

• 1:50:06Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:50:07Speaker 01

  But the jumbotron fucking nails you and it's so sick.

• 1:50:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, that's the good thing about the round, too. You can have your back to them and they totally can still see your face.

• 1:50:14Speaker 01

  I know, but I'm always worried about my butt. I'm like, I'm like, it's crazy. I want like a trench coat or something.

• 1:50:21Joe Rogan?

  Wear a trench coat. Do like what Kinison used to do.

• 1:50:24Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:50:24Joe Rogan?

  Kinison used to wear a trench coat.

• 1:50:26Speaker 01

  I can go Trinity. Trinity from Matrix.

• 1:50:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, there you go.

• 1:50:29Speaker 01

  My icon.

• 1:50:29Joe Rogan?

  There you go.

• 1:50:29Speaker 01

  I'm obsessed with Trinity.

• 1:50:30Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. Did you ever hear that lady that claims that she wrote The Matrix and they stole the idea from her?

• 1:50:37Speaker 01

  Dude, anime wrote that fucking shit. That shit is like ancient as hell.

• 1:50:40Speaker 04

  Terminator and Matrix, it's both of them.

• 1:50:42Joe Rogan?

  Right, she says she wrote both of them?

• 1:50:44Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:50:44Joe Rogan?

  Does, is there any credibility to what she says? We don't know.

• 1:50:50Speaker 01

  I had a joke about The Matrix that people were upset about, where I was upset that the Wachowski sisters were in the top 10 female directors.

• 1:50:58Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no, are they really?

• 1:51:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, because I was like, if they had come into, say they had come into MGM as sisters being like, we want to pitch a movie, like in the 90s, like, we want to pitch a movie. It's about a guy and he's in a simulation. They'd be like, how about you simulate my dick in your mouth? You know what I mean? Like, and it's not like anti-anything, but people still got mad. But yeah, that joke is, that was one of my favorites for a while. Because I'm obsessed with The Matrix. It's my favorite movie ever.

• 1:51:25Joe Rogan?

  It's a great movie, and I think we're about to literally live it.

• 1:51:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:51:28Joe Rogan?

  We're real close.

• 1:51:29Speaker 01

  I'm in the camp, everybody thinks I'm fully retarded. They just told me a lot on Twitter, that AI is going to help things, not hurt things. I'm, I would like the record to state that this is my theory. Because I think it's going to be proved right.

• 1:51:42Joe Rogan?

  You think that AI is going to help people not hurt things?

• 1:51:45Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:51:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's interesting. How do you think that that's going to happen?

• 1:51:48Speaker 01

  I just think that the whole catastrophic, this is going to be an entity that ends all of us. I don't, I don't think it's going to do that. I think that, I think that, maybe I'm just looking at the positive side, but I think it's such a smart piece of technology that was so in the works the whole time to be made, that... It's going to help us solve problems. Like, I think humanity has been trying to create somebody that can work on a supercomputer level to solve problems faster and more efficiently.

• 1:52:19Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's definitely the best-case scenario use for it.

• 1:52:22Speaker 01

  Right, but the corporations are evil and...

• 1:52:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, the problem is, they're already, they've already shown that these large language models can be programmed with ideology, right? So, did you ever see the disaster they had with Google Gemini when they first launched it? Where they said, "Show us images of Nazi soldiers," and they had multiracial Nazi soldiers.

• 1:52:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:52:43Joe Rogan?

  They're like, an Asian woman was a Nazi soldier, a black woman.

• 1:52:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:52:47Joe Rogan?

  An Indian, they had a Native American lady who was a Nazi.

• 1:52:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:52:52Joe Rogan?

  That's not real. Okay, so your ideology, by making everything diverse, you've distorted history. Like, so your ideology interfered with truth. Okay.

• 1:53:04Speaker 01

  But we do that when we take down all the statues.

• 1:53:07Joe Rogan?

  Right, but we're not that. But, right, but we're not supposed to be this large language model. This large language model's supposed to be eventually superintelligence in artificial form, right? So, a superintelligence wouldn't do that. It would know that Nazis were German and they were, you know...

• 1:53:22Speaker 04

  It wasn't Nazi that they asked for. They asked for German soldiers, and then it gave people in color, which, 1943, which would have been Nazi soldiers.

• 1:53:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, why you even getting all technical?

• 1:53:31Speaker 04

  That's, well, that's, I mean, you're asking another large language model to do something.

• 1:53:33Joe Rogan?

  I know, but it did show German soldiers that were wearing Nazi swastikas that were multiracial.

• 1:53:39Speaker 04

  I'm just saying, it didn't, it didn't, the question would have to be specific when you're talking about these things, that's why.

• 1:53:44Joe Rogan?

  German soldier which happened to be Nazi.

• 1:53:46Speaker 04

  I was trying to, with that music stuff, all night, and you have to be very specific when you want...

• 1:53:50Speaker 01

  You don't think there's any possibility that it could be something that is, that we have control over, not, that we have control over and we use it for, like, don't you think we've always been scared about everything, about science, about microscopes, about social media?

• 1:54:05Joe Rogan?

  The printing press.

• 1:54:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:54:07Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I mean, they were terrified when people first developed trains. They thought people's bodies were gonna explode if they went over thirty-five miles an hour. Yeah.

• 1:54:15Speaker 01

  It's just, this is, the human error removed is sick, dude. Those Waymo cars are sick. The doctors using ChatGPT, they're doing such a better job.

• 1:54:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, no, there's definitely a lot of pluses. The problem is control. It's always the problem. And every person that has an enormous amount of power should be carefully scrutinized. And the kind of power that you're gonna have if you are in control of essentially a digital god. Like, it becomes a problem when human beings are involved. Now, if they become completely autonomous, then you have a problem with us being irrelevant. And it not-

• 1:54:54Speaker 01

  But that's what I'm talking about, that situation where they become autonomous. That's what I'm referring to. So say we have an autonomous entity. Why would it, why would it kill us? What, we don't go, you know what I mean?

• 1:55:04Joe Rogan?

  I'm not saying it would. I don't think it would. I don't think it would kill us, but it would probably give us incentive to not breed, which I think if I was an intelligent life force, I would kind of do it exactly the way our society is already going.

• 1:55:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, we're already doing that.

• 1:55:19Joe Rogan?

  Right now. We're doing it to ourselves, but that might be by design, is my point. It might be that in order to not alarm us that this artificial intelligence has engineered our diet and our environment to kill our reproductive system. And it's already doing, but it's doing it in a very innocuous way with microplastics and a bunch of, it's doing it in a way where we don't even know what's happening. And it's just happening nicely slowly.

• 1:55:43Speaker 01

  It could be like, hey, what if we actually perpetuated the species and got it back to life like the pandas?

• 1:55:48Joe Rogan?

  I don't think that's gonna happen. I think what's going to happen is we are going to become hybrids. We're going to become a cyborg. Like a real legitimate cyborg.

• 1:55:57Speaker 01

  I'm stoked about that.

• 1:55:58Joe Rogan?

  Are you?

• 1:55:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:55:59Joe Rogan?

  You'd be first in line?

• 1:56:00Speaker 01

  Oh my god, give me the frickin' parts. You, I faint at blood, no more blood. Make me a cyborg, I'm happy. I love metal, I love scrap metal, I love cars, make me a fucking car, dude. I hate this gooey thing.

• 1:56:15Joe Rogan?

  I don't know what's gonna happen, but I do know it's gonna be unprecedented. It's gonna be a new thing.

• 1:56:20Speaker 01

  I'm surprised. The one thing that did freak me out is a guy the other day at a bachelorette party had the goggles on that was recording us.

• 1:56:26Joe Rogan?

  Oh, God.

• 1:56:27Speaker 01

  When I realized that, when I was like, oh shit, AI is gonna take in

• 1:56:31Joe Rogan?

  Everything.

• 1:56:32Speaker 01

  all of the information.

• 1:56:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. There's a lot of people wearing the meta glasses everywhere, which is like, at one point, you're like, oh, well, it's cool, new technology. Another thing you're like, but yeah, but people probably don't even fucking know they're getting recorded, and that's kind of crazy.

• 1:56:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:56:47Joe Rogan?

  It's kind of weird.

• 1:56:48Speaker 01

  Also, I don't like the idea of all these digital images of things.

• 1:56:51Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:56:52Speaker 01

  Like, if they, if it could be printed out into matter and you could look at it, but the idea of like, your entire life, like even us with the fucking iPhones.

• 1:57:00Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:57:01Speaker 01

  All these photos stress me the fuck out, dude.

• 1:57:04Joe Rogan?

  Why?

• 1:57:04Speaker 01

  Because it's so much, because there's something about it, because it, when you have a photo, you're in the present with a past photo, right? Like, I'm I'm sitting here in this reality with a past reality that I can hold.

• 1:57:16Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:57:17Speaker 01

  The weird giant vortex of memory is almost like my vortex of memory. You know what I mean? Like, neither of them have matter. My memory in my brain and this brain here, I don't like that. I think that I want the memory to be contained in matter or in my memory. I don't like this being a brain.

• 1:57:35Joe Rogan?

  Mm.

• 1:57:36Speaker 01

  And I don't like it holding pictures of all of my past.

• 1:57:38Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think when you say, I want to be a cyborg, that's, you're gonna hold all of it, and you're gonna have a hard drive. So instead of having a memory where it's fallible right now, like, your memory is like weird, like, when did we do that? Was that in November? Oh, my God, that was November? You'll have an actual memory, just like you have on your phone, where you can go back to like, for you, you know, like, you know, like it suggests you on this day, and you go to like, 2017, like, oh, my God.

• 1:58:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:58:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my God, they're so young. Oh, my God, look.

• 1:58:10Speaker 01

  That would feel less disembodied than this fucking weird unit that we're all addicted to.

• 1:58:14Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:58:15Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? It's already a part of us. It's so weird that it's just man and unit.

• 1:58:19Joe Rogan?

  But the unit you can just put down.

• 1:58:23Speaker 01

  You think it'll be?

• 1:58:24Joe Rogan?

  You can put the unit down.

• 1:58:25Speaker 01

  You think we're gonna be cyborgs like it's gonna be?

• 1:58:27Joe Rogan?

  Uh-huh. Yeah.

• 1:58:29Speaker 01

  Like, human beings will have a chip in their brain that anytime I'm like, what year was that?

• 1:58:33Joe Rogan?

  It might not even be a chip. It might be a wearable.

• 1:58:37Speaker 01

  Wearable you can put down.

• 1:58:38Joe Rogan?

  They might be able to have some thing that you put on the top of your head. You know, with electrodes that touch your temples and it just sends signals into your brain and it works from there. I mean, who knows? It's so cutting edge. And then, once AI gets into the picture, right? And AI, if you get sentient AI and you get AI that understands like how human neurotransmitters work and what to stimulate, what not to stimulate, it might devise ideas that we never even anticipated. In terms of like how to implement this technology and it'll probably figure out how to make it better.

• 1:59:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:59:13Joe Rogan?

  And then it'll be off to the races.

• 1:59:15Speaker 01

  I was so scared today because I texted my friend suicidal. Like she texted me about something and I wrote like, tongue in cheek, I'm suicidal, right? Like I'm not actually, but I wrote it. And I was like, shit, my phone is now going to send me so many fucking don't kill yourself stuff.

• 1:59:30Joe Rogan?

  Does it do that?

• 1:59:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, dude, every time I text some shit like that, I'll go on Instagram and it'll be like, don't do this, seek help, blah, blah, blah.

• 1:59:37Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's what's creepy is that your fucking Instagram knows what you're texting to your friends.

• 1:59:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, I've had two people recently be like, do you ever think it like, like sometimes I'll think a thought and an ad will come up.

• 1:59:48Joe Rogan?

  That's common.

• 1:59:49Speaker 01

  And two people in one week said that to me.

• 1:59:51Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but doesn't that just mean it's a coincidence? That means, that means you're relying on coincidence.

• 1:59:57Speaker 04

  Did you watch this thing I sent you yesterday?

• 1:59:58Joe Rogan?

  I didn't, what is it?

• 1:59:59Speaker 04

  Alright, so this got announced yesterday, they do not describe.

• 2:00:02Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, I did, I did, I forgot, yeah, go ahead.

• 2:00:05Speaker 04

  It allows telepathic communication in some way with a headset. They're clearly connected to something and they don't show that, but these two guys start talking.

• 2:00:14Speaker 01

  Those guys aren't real. Oh, they're real.

• 2:00:17Speaker 04

  Oh, sorry.

• 2:00:18Joe Rogan?

  Why is it of, what's this music? Oh.

• 2:00:24Speaker 01

  It's a dog.

• 2:00:25Speaker 04

  It's from Apple Vision.

• 2:00:27Joe Rogan?

  Oh, the Apple Vision?

• 2:00:31Speaker 04

  So this one is actually translated, let me go back to these two guys just talking.

• 2:00:35Speaker 01

  No way, these guys just have the telepathy tapes autism.

• 2:00:37Speaker 04

  It's showing, like they're trying to have a communication about food.

• 2:00:44Speaker 04

  They're just there not speaking. It's really hard to like hear this.

• 2:00:46Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 2:00:49Speaker 04

  He described that you could be in a party and both have the headset on and think words.

• 2:00:58Speaker 01

  Alright, these fuckers have to be stopped. This is too crazy.

• 2:01:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, now you're different, right?

• 2:01:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's not okay.

• 2:01:03Joe Rogan?

  I like how you swing one way and the other.

• 2:01:05Speaker 01

  No, fuck that dude. These dorks, these dorks in fucking coffee shops talking shit.

• 2:01:10Joe Rogan?

  I'm gonna use my alter ego to go tr- to give you a travel tip?

• 2:01:14Speaker 04

  It translates that into Hindi. So it starts off in English, which is into Hindi.

• 2:01:19Joe Rogan?

  Whoa.

• 2:01:20Speaker 04

  And the weird thing which was you guys were just described, they don't talk about how this works yet. They literally just like put up a video on Twitter yesterday, like if you want more information, go to our website. And so you're describing like if they have a way to get brain waves in some way.

• 2:01:34Speaker 01

  Alright, yeah, I'm out on this. I'm out on this. Especially when I see the kids that are doing it. I'm like, these kids are just fucking dorks who are getting so far.

• 2:01:41Joe Rogan?

  They're gonna look like aliens.

• 2:01:42Speaker 01

  This isn't like the agents from the Matrix inventing shit.

• 2:01:45Joe Rogan?

  People with big heads. That's what's gonna happen.

• 2:01:47Speaker 01

  But if it was the agents from the Matrix, like some attractive men in, you know, sunglasses and suits. I'd be like, okay, what you guys have planned is probably better than reality. But those fucking dorks being like, this is what we're doing now. I hate that.

• 2:02:01Joe Rogan?

  I think no matter what we do, technology's gonna keep moving. No matter what we do. And it's China's gonna do it, Russia's gonna do it, everybody with power's gonna do it. Anybody that has the, the resources, they're gonna keep pushing this technology. And if you just think, where's it going? Well, it's going, it's going in that direction. You're gonna become a part of some fucking giant hive mind.

• 2:02:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:02:20Joe Rogan?

  We're all gonna be sharing thoughts together and some bizarre buzz of information that we all suck from.

• 2:02:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:02:27Joe Rogan?

  It's gonna be real weird.

• 2:02:28Speaker 01

  It is gonna be weird, but then you could have the unpluggers, which would be nice.

• 2:02:32Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's what it's gonna be when you go to the club and you put your phone in the yonder bag. You talk some shit, do stand up.

• 2:02:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 2:02:38Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think it's one of the reasons why people love going to a comedy club now. And especially when you make them put their phone in the yonder bags.

• 2:02:44Speaker 01

  It's a game changer. It's such a game changer.

• 2:02:47Joe Rogan?

  You could actually pay attention, you actually focus. You're there, you're living in the present moment instead of constantly checking your tweets. People, you know. It's it's an addiction, man, and it's a new one, right? It's one that didn't exist for our parents. They never had to deal with it. And we're growing up with this very bizarre connection to the whole world.

• 2:03:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:03:07Joe Rogan?

  And a lot of it's negative. A lot of it's, and it's also manipulated, a lot of it's bots.

• 2:03:13Speaker 01

  I guess I'm hoping it also gets so bad, it gets better. Like, I'm hoping that, not to use the matrix again, that there will be a point where you can be like, I'm disconnecting for everything, whereas right now, it feels like we have to engage with it.

• 2:03:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:03:25Speaker 01

  Like, it would be nice to get to a point where it's like, oh, are you on or off? I'm off. And you're like, oh, OK, I won't try and text you.

• 2:03:30Joe Rogan?

  Do you ever just disconnect your social media?

• 2:03:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, when I go to my house, yeah.

• 2:03:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:03:34Speaker 01

  Totally. It disappear.

• 2:03:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's good.

• 2:03:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, and I just put this.

• 2:03:37Joe Rogan?

  That's healthy.

• 2:03:38Speaker 01

  I have like a safe where I lock my.

• 2:03:39Joe Rogan?

  Oh, good for you. That's smart.

• 2:03:41Speaker 01

  Lock my phone and lock candy.

• 2:03:43Joe Rogan?

  Candy and your phone, the same.

• 2:03:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:03:45Joe Rogan?

  What's harder, candy or the phone?

• 2:03:47Speaker 01

  Candy.

• 2:03:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, of course.

• 2:03:48Speaker 01

  Fuck the phone.

• 2:03:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:03:49Speaker 01

  Candy rules, dude. Candy's so good. The phone sucks. It stresses me out.

• 2:03:55Joe Rogan?

  Little candy fishes?

• 2:03:56Speaker 01

  Those are my favorite, Swedish fish.

• 2:03:57Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:03:58Speaker 01

  I just had a real one from Swedish.

• 2:03:59Joe Rogan?

  What do you mean?

• 2:04:00Speaker 01

  From Sweden.

• 2:04:00Joe Rogan?

  Most of them forgeries?

• 2:04:02Speaker 01

  The fake, the red ones?

• 2:04:03Joe Rogan?

  There's fake Swedish fish?

• 2:04:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, those are American bullshit. The Swedish fish are black.

• 2:04:08Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:04:08Speaker 01

  From Sweden.

• 2:04:09Joe Rogan?

  Really? Interesting.

• 2:04:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:04:11Joe Rogan?

  It probably doesn't have our nasty chemicals for the dyes.

• 2:04:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, the Red Forty.

• 2:04:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:04:15Speaker 01

  Is RFK against Red Forty?

• 2:04:17Joe Rogan?

  I think so.

• 2:04:18Speaker 01

  Dude, it's so funny watching RFK go through the lesbian moms that I have, like, you know, because they're so liberal, so they're like, fuck RFK. And then at one point, he's like, I want to bring back raw milk. And I sat to watch my entire town of Ithaca be like, wow, we do love raw milk. We actually like that quite a bit. Because they're like, right now, siphoning raw milk illegally off of farms.

• 2:04:38Joe Rogan?

  It's so silly that raw milk is illegal and you go buy whiskey at Costco.

• 2:04:42Speaker 01

  It's so weird.

• 2:04:43Joe Rogan?

  It's so dumb.

• 2:04:44Speaker 01

  Raw milk is so good.

• 2:04:45Joe Rogan?

  It's really good.

• 2:04:46Speaker 01

  Francis Ellis is all about the raw cheese and milk.

• 2:04:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's good for you.

• 2:04:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:04:49Joe Rogan?

  And for a lot of people that have lactose intolerance.

• 2:04:52Speaker 01

  Oh, not Francis Ellis, Jason Ellis. Francis Ellis is a different comedian.

• 2:04:54Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Jason Ellis is a comedian?

• 2:04:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. Francis Ellis is a comedian, but he's way more into rotisserie chicken.

• 2:05:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's really good for you.

• 2:05:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:05:02Joe Rogan?

  It's just, don't get it bad. Don't get it where it's contaminated.

• 2:05:05Speaker 01

  And then what happens? You just have a bug or?

• 2:05:07Joe Rogan?

  Probably get fucking rancid diarrhea.

• 2:05:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, but whatever. Better than a fucking cancer.

• 2:05:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Well, I think your body, when it's homogenized and pasteurized, it's like, what is this?

• 2:05:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:05:18Joe Rogan?

  With no enzymes. What is this water protein you're making me drink that I'm gonna fart out?

• 2:05:23Speaker 01

  Yeah. I bet we could drink endless raw milk. I bet we could really go ham on raw milk and cheese.

• 2:05:28Speaker 04

  Hmm. Swedish Fish is a taste supposed to be called a lingonberry.

• 2:05:33Joe Rogan?

  A lingonberry?

• 2:05:34Speaker 04

  But that black, the black stuff is a different kind. It's called salmoniac, which is black salted licorice.

• 2:05:39Speaker 01

  That shit is good.

• 2:05:41Joe Rogan?

  Ooh, you like that? Is that your shit?

• 2:05:42Speaker 04

  Ammonium chloride?

• 2:05:43Joe Rogan?

  Ammonium chloride?

• 2:05:45Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 2:05:46Speaker 04

  Probably not better than Red 40? I don't know.

• 2:05:47Joe Rogan?

  Well, let's, let's Google ammonium chloride.

• 2:05:49Speaker 01

  We assume everything Nordic countries do is better.

• 2:05:51Joe Rogan?

  I know, right?

• 2:05:52Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 2:05:53Joe Rogan?

  We assume.

• 2:05:54Speaker 04

  Smelling salts.

• 2:05:54Speaker 01

  They'll be in the audience and I'll be like, oh, you think you're better than me? And they're like, no, we really like you.

• 2:05:58Joe Rogan?

  White crystalline, water soluble salt.

• 2:06:01Speaker 04

  I mean, that's just salt taste.

• 2:06:02Joe Rogan?

  Formed from ammonia and hydrogen chloride, used primarily as a fertilizer. An expectorant in cold medications and a component in soldering and galvanizing fluxes to clean metal surfaces. Also found in dry cell batteries such as a flavoring agent in its natural form. It's called salmoniac.

• 2:06:21Speaker 04

  I'm sure it's delicious.

• 2:06:23Speaker 01

  It's good.

• 2:06:25Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's like, um, monosodium glutamate. Everybody was scared of that for the longest time. And Bourdain and I were talking about it and he's like, no. He's like, it's good. He's like, it makes the food taste better. I go...

• 2:06:37Speaker 01

  Anthony Bourdain.

• 2:06:38Joe Rogan?

  Right. It does, right? He's like, yeah. I go, what do you think about all the stuff about it being bad for you? Cause I think it's bullshit.

• 2:06:44Speaker 01

  Yeah. And what does it do? It's just a?

• 2:06:47Joe Rogan?

  Monosodium glutamate is like what they would always put. The thing was, it was always, you would hear that it was used in Chinese food. But it was used in a lot of food. I remember when I worked at Newport Creamery, they used to have some laying around. I think, God, what was the name of this stuff?

• 2:07:01Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. You go into places where you can, MSG is every time?

• 2:07:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but there was a name that, there was a product. MSG enhances umami flavors with less sodium, about one third the sodium of salt. Why? N A C I primarily?

• 2:07:20Joe Rogan?

  Wasn't it called Accent? Wasn't there something like that? Where there was a monosodium glutamate product that they would have for restaurants? God, I can't remember what it was called.

• 2:07:33Joe Rogan?

  Is it Accent? Yeah, there it is.

• 2:07:36Speaker 01

  That's a good rebrand.

• 2:07:37Joe Rogan?

  Global food company known for amino science. The Mommy seasoning, yeah, that's it. So they'd have like a tub of that stuff, you'd throw it in whatever the fuck you're cooking, it made it taste better.

• 2:07:47Speaker 01

  What was the?

• 2:07:48Joe Rogan?

  But monosodium glutamate was like the thing that everybody was always blaming. "Oh, I gotta stay away from Chinese food, that fucking MSG kills me."

• 2:07:54Speaker 01

  It's so good.

• 2:07:55Joe Rogan?

  And he was like, "That's bullshit."

• 2:07:56Speaker 01

  But why did we say that?

• 2:07:57Joe Rogan?

  I don't know. It's probably one of those things that we got stuck with, like saturated fat's bad for you. Because some cunt got a lot of money from the sugar lobby. And so they wrote some fake science and everybody bought into it. Those guys fucked everybody so hard and they did it for 50 grand. They did it for 50 grand like the 1960s and forever we've been fucked.

• 2:08:19Speaker 01

  And I fell for it for a long time.

• 2:08:21Joe Rogan?

  60 years, everybody's been like, "Oh, oh, go stay away from it, stay away from fat." Uh, the perceptions of MSG's danger stem from the anecdotal reports and flawed early studies, not from consistent scientific evidence. For most people, MSG does not cause health problems, however, a small subset of the population may be sensitive to it and experience temporary mild symptoms. So what's the mild symptoms? Headaches, nausea, drowsiness, yeah, flushing or sweating. Maybe you just ate too much, you fat fuck. It was once called the Chinese Restaurant Syndrome. Now known as MSG Symptom Complex. These symptoms often appear within two hours and are typically mild. Yeah, but also, you probably ate like a pig.

• 2:09:05Speaker 01

  Also whiskey again.

• 2:09:06Joe Rogan?

  Difficulty breathing in rare severe cases. You probably drank beer and ate 50 bowls of noodles, you fat fuck.

• 2:09:16Speaker 01

  Is RFK pro fucking, is he like pro, uh, checking all of this stuff? Or is he, isn't he the anti, just like let it all run? Or is he?

• 2:09:26Joe Rogan?

  No, he thinks you should know what's bad for you. And if you want to take it, you should, there should be a label on the food letting you know that the stuff in there has been shown to cause X, Y, and Z.

• 2:09:38Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 2:09:39Joe Rogan?

  That's it. Like, he's not, he doesn't say, "We need to get rid of cigarettes," or, "We need to get rid of whiskey." Like, if you don't say that, those two things, if you don't say, "No more cigarettes, no more whiskey." If you don't say that, then shut up.

• 2:09:49Speaker 01

  So, the left is worried about deregulation, right?

• 2:09:53Joe Rogan?

  They're worried about deregulation.

• 2:09:54Speaker 01

  Is that true?

• 2:09:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, with, with many things, yeah. With environmental concerns, I'm sure they're worried about deregulation. With banking and industry, they worry about deregulation.

• 2:10:03Speaker 01

  Is there any party that's just pro-regulation?

• 2:10:05Joe Rogan?

  Me?

• 2:10:06Speaker 01

  Is there any party that's just pro-regulation? Regulate AI, regulate Instagram, regulate-

• 2:10:10Joe Rogan?

  I think the Democrats are much more interested in regulating things. Like, if you look at the most regulated states, they're Democrat-run states. Like, California has a lot of red tape and regulations if you want to get anything done.

• 2:10:23Speaker 01

  Socialist is the most regulated.

• 2:10:25Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, because they want control. They want more, more control from the government. They have a bigger, bloated government, and the way to keep that functioning is you gotta go through hoops and ladders to get through anything. Anything that you want to get done.

• 2:10:37Speaker 01

  I feel like it's all or nothing. I feel like you have to regulate everything or regulate nothing.

• 2:10:40Joe Rogan?

  No, some regulation is good. Like, regu-, like, your, your parents are contractors, right? There's a good example. You need-

• 2:10:46Speaker 01

  Too much regulation there.

• 2:10:48Joe Rogan?

  Too much regulation, but you need inspectors.

• 2:10:50Speaker 01

  Fuck the inspect-, they suck.

• 2:10:52Joe Rogan?

  Okay. You can't say that, because if your family does a good job, and I'm sure they do, that's fine. But there's a bunch of fly-by-night fuckheads-

• 2:10:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:10:59Joe Rogan?

  -that, you know, make a house and don't follow code, and then shit goes sideways and falls apart.

• 2:11:06Speaker 01

  That shit is so corrupt. That stuff is like, that's, I mean, the bureaucratic bullshit that contractors have to go through is psycho.

• 2:11:12Joe Rogan?

  That's true, too.

• 2:11:13Speaker 01

  I used to be a contractor, too. The amount of, I should have been-

• 2:11:16Joe Rogan?

  I think there's a comfortable medium.

• 2:11:17Speaker 01

  I thi-, yeah, I don't-

• 2:11:20Joe Rogan?

  My stepdad was an architect, so I grew up around construction sites as well.

• 2:11:23Speaker 01

  So, you know how frustrating that guy is?

• 2:11:25Joe Rogan?

  I do, but I also know that there's a lot of shady motherfuckers that are involved in construction. And you gotta make sure these assholes follow code, otherwise this house is gonna collapse and kill everybody inside. People suck.

• 2:11:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:11:36Joe Rogan?

  Some people suck, and they, they cut corners, they save money, they do things all half-assed. You need someone to go and inspect it.

• 2:11:43Speaker 01

  But then it's weird to not have regulation on other, there's no regulation with social media. I mean, unless it's the censorship shit.

• 2:11:50Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:11:50Speaker 01

  That's, it's weird.

• 2:11:51Joe Rogan?

  And it's really bad for you. Psychologically, it might be one of the worst things that's ever happened to, like, collectively, society. Psychologically, like, if you look at Jonathan Haidt's book, have you ever read his book, um, The Coddling of the American Mind?

• 2:12:07Speaker 01

  No.

• 2:12:07Joe Rogan?

  It's all about, he's great. It's all about social media and then self-harm with girls. This is a big thing. Self-harm, suicidal ideation, suicidal thoughts. That all comes like this, because ramps way up when social media gets introduced. And...

• 2:12:26Speaker 01

  There should just be elected committees, elected psychological committee, elected philosophical committee.

• 2:12:31Joe Rogan?

  Who, who's gonna tell you you can and can't do it? Who's, who's gonna say you should and shouldn't say things? If you don't like it, you should get off of it. And that's what I do. I just stay off of it for the most part.

• 2:12:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, but these kids are just on.

• 2:12:42Joe Rogan?

  I know, but so is booze, right? The, you get, they have, no, don't do that, it'll ruin your life. Don't do this, this could ruin your life too. Like, and it also suck your time away.

• 2:12:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, but it's a drug. It needs to be regulated like a drug.

• 2:12:55Joe Rogan?

  Eh. Who's gonna be the one? Who's gonna tell you what we, I don't want anybody telling me I can't go on Twitter. If I'm at home and I have nothing to do, and I, I pay taxes, I fucking, my bills are paid, I wanna just fuck off.

• 2:13:10Speaker 01

  Any tactic for attention monopolization has to be removed, says the, the committee that doesn't exist. Like, you know how you feed them?

• 2:13:18Joe Rogan?

  But it's not monopolization if you can shut it off anytime you want.

• 2:13:21Speaker 01

  But it pulls you in, it sends you alerts, it gives you the dopamine thing, it gives you the...

• 2:13:25Joe Rogan?

  I don't have alerts on. I've never had alerts on.

• 2:13:28Speaker 01

  The kids do.

• 2:13:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, they should shut that shit off. Someone should teach them how to use it correctly. And also tell them, like, hey, this is a lot of negativity and a lot of these people are wasting their life on this shit. You're wasting your time.

• 2:13:39Speaker 01

  But I know that, and I just fell into a dark hellhole last night. Like, it's hard to avoid, it's, it's...

• 2:13:44Joe Rogan?

  It is, but you can do it, I do it.

• 2:13:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I, I can do it, but 13-year-old Jordan would be fucking hanging from that closet at the Airbnb. I mean, it would be rough.

• 2:13:53Joe Rogan?

  15-year-old Joe would be tweeting horrible shit at every celebrity.

• 2:13:58Speaker 01

  Oh, just horrible shit. That's the other thing, horrible shit.

• 2:14:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, under fake accounts, you can make 30 different accounts.

• 2:14:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:14:06Joe Rogan?

  Make a new Gmail address, make a new account, all they have is their IP address.

• 2:14:09Speaker 01

  Maybe that should be no more fake accounts.

• 2:14:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but then the thing is whistleblowers are important, right? If someone is in the government and there's some shady shit going on and you can expose it and you don't want to die.

• 2:14:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:14:21Joe Rogan?

  You don't want to get seth riched.

• 2:14:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, but isn't there another way to whistleblow like graffiti or something?

• 2:14:28Joe Rogan?

  Doesn't work.

• 2:14:28Speaker 01

  By a billboard?

• 2:14:29Joe Rogan?

  It can't go viral.

• 2:14:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:14:31Joe Rogan?

  Billboards don't go viral. You gotta, you gotta be able to express yourself without fear of consequences because there's a lot of people that don't have any power. And there's a government or maybe you find out that the corporation you work for is doing some horrible shit. And they're bypassing some environmental regulation and dumping toxic stuff into the ocean like.

• 2:14:52Speaker 01

  Well, maybe it just comes down to regulating the corporations and being like, bro, you can't make money off of people's data. You can't make money off of.

• 2:14:59Joe Rogan?

  That's a problem. It's because they, they didn't, we didn't know when we all signed up for it that data was going to be this massive commodity. Not only is it very valuable, but then it gives them insane power. The people that have all that money and have all that power, now they're in control of, you know, essentially all social discourse.

• 2:15:18Speaker 01

  So maybe that's the thing that needs to be regulated.

• 2:15:22Joe Rogan?

  I don't know.

• 2:15:23Speaker 01

  If just like.

• 2:15:24Joe Rogan?

  When they do regulate it, then it's like, like you saw, did you ever read the Twitter files? Did you read any of the stuff that Matt Taibbi and Schellenberger and all these guys? When Elon purchased Twitter, one of the things they found out was the intelligence communities had been deeply embedded into Twitter. And then they were involved in suppressing certain narratives and pushing other ones. And it was like really sketchy stuff, like dangerous, dangerous stuff. Because if they have the power to suppress accurate, real information, then you, you're propagandizing to the entire country. You're, you're shifting narratives, you're changing the way people think about things. This can affect elections, this can affect public health, this is going to affect everything.

• 2:16:06Joe Rogan?

  And they were doing that and they were doing it because they had regulation over social media. They had power. Now Elon comes along and he's like, fuck that, it's Wild West time. And opens it wide up and everyone's like, oh, it's all racist now, there's Nazis like. Yes, there's more of that now because it's not getting banned. But also there's more people that, you know, can talk about virtually anything that they want to. And you can debate it out. You can talk about the climate, you can talk about the moon, you can talk about asteroids. You could talk about foreign governments, you can talk about anything. And that's better. It's better to have people say horrible shit, but also be able to say true shit than not be able to say anything.

• 2:16:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I worry about the, I worry about the, I, it just comes down to kids for me because they get radicalized. I mean, it, when you see the racist shit and you join the tribe, it just like becomes.

• 2:17:00Joe Rogan?

  They can, they can also get radicalized, they, they can also become Christians, they could also become like hikers. They could also like really get into jujitsu, they could also like.

• 2:17:09Speaker 01

  ISIS.

• 2:17:10Joe Rogan?

  Join video games, you could join ISIS.

• 2:17:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, ISIS.

• 2:17:13Joe Rogan?

  They could also do whatever the fuck they want to do. I mean, this is just, we gotta duke it out in the battlefield of ideas and that's, that has to be able to take place. You can't have people decide what you can and can't discuss. Because the problem with that is like then they have power over you and they have power over the most important thing that we do as a culture. Which is figure out what's right and what's wrong. Figure out who's correct and who's, who's incorrect. What's, what's a fact and what is a lie? What is propaganda? Why, why have they made so much money pushing this thing where there's no science behind it? And if you say, they, then they say, trust the science. Okay, well, show me what the science is. And then you have people that are looking at the science that are actual scientists that get boycotted and banned from Twitter.

• 2:17:55Joe Rogan?

  That's one of the things that happened during the, this whole FBI infiltration of Twitter. Whatever the organization was that the government had that was deeply, it was multiple organizations deeply embedded. They were kicking people off, they were like Stanford scientists. That were, they were, they had a different view of how the pandemic should be hel- handled. They're kicking them off Twitter.

• 2:18:16Speaker 01

  And then you get to a point where you need regulators on the regulators and who's gonna regulate the regulators.

• 2:18:20Joe Rogan?

  Who's gonna regulate the regulators.

• 2:18:22Speaker 01

  So you think Wild West teach your kids correctly?

• 2:18:25Joe Rogan?

  Yes, I think that's better. I think this is the world we're living in and it's a weird world. But this is the reality of the world and you need to prepare them for the reality of the world. Don't shield them from it.

• 2:18:35Speaker 01

  Right, I guess it's just technology being such a drug is an issue to me.

• 2:18:39Joe Rogan?

  It is a drug, but.

• 2:18:41Speaker 01

  It feels like the, it feels like the government making money off of selling fentanyl. Like, that's what it feels like.

• 2:18:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but it's also fun for kids, too. They're doing Snapchats and they're fucking, they're having a good time, too. It's not all negative, you know, it's just, it can be negative. And the pylons, like when people, like that lady, what she did to her daughter, which is the most evil fucking thing ever. But there's groups of kids that will go after a kid and pile on them and attack them anonymously. And, you know, kids kill themselves over things like that. It freaks them out.

• 2:19:13Speaker 01

  Teens? How do they deal with it?

• 2:19:15Joe Rogan?

  They're pretty remarkably healthy. It's very strange.

• 2:19:18Speaker 01

  They have social media, but they aren't crazy about it?

• 2:19:20Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, one of, one of them just got off of everything. She's, she's wants to concentrate on her schoolwork. She hasn't been on any social media in over 90 days. It's very impressive.

• 2:19:28Speaker 01

  But that's an addiction, to be like 90 days of clean.

• 2:19:31Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but it's also, she can do it, you know? It's like, it's not an addiction like, oh my god, you know, if you ever get on social media again, now you're gonna be homeless and snort in social media. No, it's like, it's a thing that's not necessarily good for you, just like cake. Don't eat cake all day. But if you wanna have a birthday cake, or you wanna occasionally have a piece of cake, you have dinner, nice dinner, let's get some dessert, fuck it.

• 2:19:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, but what about the cake? What if every time I went to go eat cake, there was 90 other dudes in the cake shop that were being like, we should kill this group of people? And you'd be like, fuck, I really wanna eat cake, but these people keep saying that, and maybe I believe them because I've read so much? At some point, somebody should walk into the cake shop and be like, dude, you guys can't be here.

• 2:20:10Joe Rogan?

  There, there are laws, right? So like, there's free speech, but if you threaten someone, there's laws against that.

• 2:20:18Speaker 01

  If you threaten a group?

• 2:20:20Joe Rogan?

  Yes, yeah, if you say, I want to kill all the Greeks in America. Like, someone will come get you.

• 2:20:28Speaker 01

  Nobody wants them dead. We love them.

• 2:20:30Joe Rogan?

  Everybody loves Greeks. But if, if you just said something like that, yeah, someone would visit you from the FBI if you make threats against people. But we have existing laws that already protect people from that.

• 2:20:43Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 2:20:44Joe Rogan?

  I just think most people should say the fuck off of it because most of the people that are doing it are wasting their life.

• 2:20:50Speaker 01

  It's crazy how I just last night was sucked into this vortex and then I just put my phone away and my dog was sitting right there. Yeah. And I was like, oh, hey, real life thing that loves me.

• 2:21:01Joe Rogan?

  Also, I had no idea that this was going on with you. I had no idea.

• 2:21:05Speaker 01

  I know, it's ridiculous. It sucks so bad because I was trying to be so, I was like actively trying to say a woke thing that I went through. Padding myself on my fucking back and it just fucking spun out of control.

• 2:21:17Joe Rogan?

  You can never be woke enough because it's all horseshit. It's all horseshit. It's all, it's just a cult. It's, and it's a cult that is mostly perpetrated by people that don't have a religion. So it behaves like a religion.

• 2:21:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:21:32Joe Rogan?

  You can get excommunicated, you can get cast out of the kingdom for life. There's rules. If you, if you follow those rules, you'll be good. If you're not, you're a heretic.

• 2:21:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:21:42Joe Rogan?

  It's a religion and it's a religion for people that don't have a religion because there's a fucking weird part of our brain. That whether you are a Democrat or Republican, it, it fits that spot.

• 2:21:55Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:21:56Joe Rogan?

  It, it, so there's a, if you don't have something in your life that you, you think of as a higher power or at least have like some sort of ethical and moral foundation and some goal, some higher goal that you ascribe to. Something will fill that spot. There's a spot in your brain and that spot will be, I'm a Republican. Or that spot will be, I'm a liberal and we gotta, these goddamn racists and all these, all these white people. We gotta get rid of white people. White people say that. We gotta, the real problem is white people. They'll say that and they'll say they'll pat themselves on the back while they're saying it because they think they're being a good wokester.

• 2:22:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:22:30Joe Rogan?

  It's just nuts. It's just religion. It's just.

• 2:22:32Speaker 01

  I, it's crazy how many people DM'd me and I DM'd them back being like, hey, I just want you to know, like, I'm so. I like totally didn't mean to hurt anybody and I'm really sorry if you're offended by this. And they would just immediately be like, oh, it's totally okay. I take back everything I said. When what they said was like, you fucking bitch. And I just was like, hey, I'm a person. And they're like, oh shit, I completely forgot. And I was like, oh, okay, yeah.

• 2:22:52Joe Rogan?

  Everybody, it's a terrible way to communicate.

• 2:22:55Speaker 01

  It's bizarre, yeah. I mean, I fucking do it. I talk so much shit about everything and then I get there and I'm like, oh yeah, this is. I think it just feels good to believe something. It feels so good to stand your ground on something and to be like,

• 2:23:08Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:23:08Speaker 01

  I did something today that meant something, even though it doesn't mean anything.

• 2:23:13Joe Rogan?

  It doesn't.

• 2:23:14Speaker 01

  We need meaning so fucking bad.

• 2:23:16Joe Rogan?

  We do. And that's why it takes the place of religion for people that don't have religion.

• 2:23:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, but it doesn't have to be religion. You can have it be in the, you can have it be the.

• 2:23:26Joe Rogan?

  No, it doesn't have to be religion. No, but I mean, there's a spot in our brains.

• 2:23:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:23:30Joe Rogan?

  That religion has always been there and we've filled that spot with whatever the fuck it is. Leftist politics, right wing ideology, whatever the fuck it is.

• 2:23:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:23:40Joe Rogan?

  You find a thing that becomes your religion.

• 2:23:43Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 2:23:43Joe Rogan?

  People are fucking broken. We're so weird.

• 2:23:46Speaker 01

  It is broken.

• 2:23:47Joe Rogan?

  Also wonderful. We're fun. When we, you know, when we work right.

• 2:23:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, when we're face to face.

• 2:23:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:23:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, online it's.

• 2:23:57Joe Rogan?

  Sometimes it's not, you know?

• 2:23:59Speaker 01

  Crazy, but then you run into the person who talks shit about you and you're like, oh, hey, what's, yeah. You were just playing the video game.

• 2:24:05Joe Rogan?

  Yep.

• 2:24:05Speaker 01

  Of hatred.

• 2:24:06Joe Rogan?

  Yep.

• 2:24:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:24:07Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. And that's what most people are doing on Instagram and on Twitter. Because it's just such an easy thing to do. And especially if your life sucks, it's a great distraction. You can pay attention to other people and tell fuck Jordan, fucking cunt, and just say horrible shit. And it distracts you from whatever is wrong with your life.

• 2:24:26Speaker 01

  But the video game of like health and body perfection, like getting jacked, is like the religion that many comics are in, me too. And it is, it does take that role a lot. Like a lot of times when people are just hatred, I'm like, just target lower belly fat. If you want to be fucking activated about something, get fucking pissed at that. You know what I mean? Cause it's always, I look at the picture of these people and they're just like miserable fuckers in a basement. And I'm like, dude, just,

• 2:24:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:24:53Speaker 01

  What if you just spent all day taking a really long bath and just cleaning that shit off you? You know what I mean? Instead of hating me.

• 2:25:01Joe Rogan?

  Well, think about what we're talking about with OCD, those tight grooves of behavior that just get just, just, it's so easy to slide into those grooves. They're so honed.

• 2:25:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:25:11Joe Rogan?

  They've been used so many times, just an instantaneous decision to go down those pathways. It's hard for people. It's hard for people to snap out of them, especially people that are fragile and that are worried about getting attacked themselves. Those are the most vicious.

• 2:25:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:25:25Joe Rogan?

  The most fragile people are the most vicious. They're the most mean, the ones that are worried about being criticized themselves.

• 2:25:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 2:25:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:25:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:25:33Joe Rogan?

  Hurt people hurt people.

• 2:25:35Speaker 01

  True dat.

• 2:25:36Joe Rogan?

  That's it.

• 2:25:36Speaker 01

  I've done it. I've done it. I've hurt people.

• 2:25:38Joe Rogan?

  We all have.

• 2:25:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:25:39Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. It's normal. It's a normal part of being a person. It's just, the social media thing, there's very little value and a lot of negativity. Or you could use it correctly if you're a journalist, or if you're someone who's curated a good feed and you just want to find out what's actually happening.

• 2:25:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:25:57Joe Rogan?

  Because the world's filled with crazy shit that happens all the time that you don't know about unless you get on Twitter. If you just paid attention to the mainstream news, you'd miss 80% of what's going on in the world.

• 2:26:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's true. Yeah, I mean, there's so much. I talk so much shit about social media, but the amount of animal videos that have brought me back from the, I mean, I found out that otters have a little skin pocket and it's like saved my life multiple times just knowing that. Like, that shit is so good.

• 2:26:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:26:23Speaker 01

  Any fast intake of National Geographic online is like...

• 2:26:27Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:26:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 2:26:28Joe Rogan?

  Well, there's, like, most of my time I spend, if I'm fucking off on my phone, is on YouTube. And I don't have a problem with that, because most of that, it's like videos. I'm getting educated.

• 2:26:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, I would not have been able to be a contractor without YouTube.

• 2:26:40Joe Rogan?

  This is interesting.

• 2:26:41Speaker 01

  Yeah. I should have called my business YouTube.

• 2:26:43Joe Rogan?

  There's so much you can learn if you just do it right. Like, YouTube is the most amazing resource if you just do it right.

• 2:26:49Speaker 01

  And there's just some fucking guy who's like, "I'm gonna teach you exactly how to utilize this impact driver." And you're like, "Yeah, I don't know why you're doing this, but thank you."

• 2:26:57Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, why are you doing that?

• 2:26:59Speaker 01

  It's really weird. Some of those people, they're like, "I'm gonna tell you how to change a Toyota tire on a Nissan truck." And I'm like... That's exactly what I need.

• 2:27:06Joe Rogan?

  Fifty-two views.

• 2:27:07Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 2:27:08Joe Rogan?

  Right, right, right.

• 2:27:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, those guys rule.

• 2:27:10Joe Rogan?

  Oh, there's so much good how-to stuff that's available online. But, or you can get on Twitter and just start yelling about the Jews. Or figure out, figure out a thing, whatever it is.

• 2:27:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:27:21Joe Rogan?

  What is the fucking climate? Do you understand what's happening? We won't have an earth for our children. You know, people go crazy.

• 2:27:29Speaker 01

  Are you worried about your kids' future?

• 2:27:31Joe Rogan?

  Um, of course, yeah, of course. I'm worried about everybody's future. I'm worried about their future. I don't want anything bad to happen to them. Just like, I don't want anything bad to happen to anybody.

• 2:27:41Speaker 01

  That's why I can't, I don't think I can have kids.

• 2:27:43Joe Rogan?

  But when people say that, I was like, "I wouldn't want to have kids today." I'm like, "Yeah, why would you with all the books and medicine and shit?" People had kids before they figured out doors.

• 2:27:53Speaker 01

  When they say I don't want to bring a kid into this world, like, I sometimes don't want a kid just because the idea of letting my dog outside without me scares me. But like, and I'm neurotic. But when they say that, I'm like, "You're talking about the absence of consciousness being superior to consciousness."

• 2:28:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:28:08Speaker 01

  That, that's a paradox. You can't say one is better than the other. There is no better until you're born.

• 2:28:13Joe Rogan?

  Not only that, there's a lot of people in my, my life that I love. A lot, I have a lot of good friends. I have a lot of people that I love. The only way you make people is they have to be babies. And they grow up to be people that you love.

• 2:28:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:28:26Joe Rogan?

  That's the game.

• 2:28:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:28:28Joe Rogan?

  That's life. You have to, if you love people, you probably love kids.

• 2:28:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:28:33Joe Rogan?

  You just don't know it. And you probably are, you know, terrified of responsibility, which is real.

• 2:28:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:28:38Joe Rogan?

  But you can have kids. It's, it's not bad.

• 2:28:42Speaker 01

  Do you think everybody should do it?

• 2:28:43Joe Rogan?

  No. I think, you do, I think you'd have a rich and full life and never have children. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. And I always resented that when I didn't have children. People say, "Oh, you don't even know, you don't have kids."

• 2:28:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:28:55Joe Rogan?

  Like, okay. Like, don't say that. That's silly.

• 2:28:58Speaker 01

  Did it change everything?

• 2:28:59Joe Rogan?

  Alienate people. Yeah, it changes it.

• 2:29:00Speaker 01

  Did it unlock like a Molly level of love?

• 2:29:02Joe Rogan?

  Yes. Chappelle had the best quote about this. He said, "Not only did it change the amount of love that I have, it changed my capacity for love."

• 2:29:10Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 2:29:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you don't know, like, how much you love your dog, and I know you love your dog, I've seen you with your dog.

• 2:29:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:29:16Joe Rogan?

  You love your kids times a million.

• 2:29:19Speaker 01

  But that's frightening, that level of love, how do you let them go to school?

• 2:29:23Joe Rogan?

  Life is crazy, life is frightening, you just have to learn and grow and just deal, this is just part of the thing, you can't just be safe forever, you're not gonna live, you're gonna die, we're all going to, you just have to exist. And to, you know, you have to, like, when you don't see your friend, like, bye, and you, you know, they get on a plane, like, oh my god, what if the plane crashes? What if I never see them again? You can't live like that.

• 2:29:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, but a child, I would be so...

• 2:29:50Joe Rogan?

  I know, I know, I know, I know.

• 2:29:51Speaker 01

  You had to teach yourself to chill?

• 2:29:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:29:53Speaker 01

  Really?

• 2:29:53Joe Rogan?

  And then you still, you only chill so much, you know, you love them so much, it's hard. But I think, uh, there's a reason why societies like people to have children, because it makes you much more concerned with law and order. Makes you much more concerned with, you know, cleanliness and pollution and all of the harm that could happen to your child.

• 2:30:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:30:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. You worry more, because if it's just you're selfish and you're by yourself, fuck everybody, I'm gonna go get a whore, you know, like, okay.

• 2:30:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:30:22Joe Rogan?

  You're not really a part of this thing, you're just kinda like, you're a leech, you know, like, this, this thing is all of us together.

• 2:30:30Speaker 01

  It would frustrate me if I had kids that, people without kids have equal right to vote, that would annoy me.

• 2:30:36Joe Rogan?

  Why?

• 2:30:36Speaker 01

  I don't know.

• 2:30:37Joe Rogan?

  Oh, because they could vote for negative things about your kids?

• 2:30:38Speaker 01

  It just would, it would piss me off, I'd be like, you don't, you're not keeping a life around, you know what I mean, like, you're just a selfish shitter and eater, you know?

• 2:30:46Joe Rogan?

  Well, there's a lot of those selfish shitters and eaters too, that think that somehow, because this is one of the things that people are being taught today, that somehow or another, because there's so much money in the world, like, you're owed something, and they should just, we should have universal basic income, and your needs should be met, there's a bunch of people that think that way. Don't think that you should provide a value, that your needs should be met because there's so much wealth in the world. And that everything else, whatever the wealthy people have on top of that, that should only exist once their needs are met, because there's a fake scarcity crisis. In this country and it's really because the wealthy people have gotten so much.

• 2:31:24Speaker 01

  But that's the Bernie bro.

• 2:31:25Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, there's some truth to that, though, right? There is some truth, like if someone acquires all the money and everybody else is poor, obviously you have a broken system.

• 2:31:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:31:36Joe Rogan?

  Bernie's idea was to take a small amount of stock market exchanges, just like a fraction of a penny for each one of these. And that money would all be an incredible resource that would go to education and healthcare. And all these different quality of life things that would have a legitimate impact on society. That's what I was interested in. That was my most compelling thought that he had.

• 2:32:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:32:01Joe Rogan?

  The most compelling thought to me. I was like, that seems like that would work. That seemed like that would have a big impact and it would change a lot of things.

• 2:32:10Speaker 01

  I'm, I've always been down for the tax, the shit, the corporations. I've always been down for it and not view them as having human rights.

• 2:32:17Joe Rogan?

  Well, the weird thing is that they have, they have the ability to donate insane amounts of money towards congressional campaigns and senate races.

• 2:32:24Speaker 01

  That's fucked.

• 2:32:24Joe Rogan?

  That's fucked.

• 2:32:25Speaker 01

  So if they're gonna take that, stop that, no, no, what is that called?

• 2:32:31Joe Rogan?

  What?

• 2:32:31Speaker 01

  What is that called? Electoral funding?

• 2:32:34Joe Rogan?

  Uh, sure.

• 2:32:35Speaker 01

  Election funding? There's a name for it, but stop that.

• 2:32:37Joe Rogan?

  Campaign funding?

• 2:32:37Speaker 01

  Campaign funding.

• 2:32:38Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 2:32:39Speaker 01

  Stop that and...

• 2:32:40Joe Rogan?

  It's not even just that. It's like, it's funding super PACs, it's funding NGOs, it's, it's, there's a lot of shit that goes on. That's just really about influence.

• 2:32:51Speaker 01

  But if you get a corporation that's making that much money, you tax the shit out of it for schools.

• 2:32:56Joe Rogan?

  Well, not a bad idea, but... You gotta be able to make money. The real problem with corporations is they have to always make more money. Like if you have a responsibility for your shareholder, if you're a CEO, every corp, every quarter, you have to make more money. Like the idea is like, you're doing really well, you're making more money. And the only way to really keep making, they never go, we're good. Hey, everybody, we're good.

• 2:33:16Speaker 01

  Why not?

• 2:33:17Joe Rogan?

  Cause they're cunts.

• 2:33:18Speaker 01

  Oh, okay, okay, okay.

• 2:33:19Joe Rogan?

  Like you get to this, that's the game they're playing. They're playing the, I want more money game. They're not playing the, let's make the world a better place game, because it's a corporation.

• 2:33:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:33:27Joe Rogan?

  So it's a sociopath. It acts like a sociopath. You ever seen like, the, when they've done these studies where they're like, well, look at the behavior of a corporation. It's basically a psychopath.

• 2:33:38Speaker 01

  That's why I think they should fund the shit. It's crazy how much the middle class is taxed.

• 2:33:44Joe Rogan?

  What they really fucked up was with the stock market in general in the first place.

• 2:33:47Speaker 01

  Stock market is so weird to me. I will not put any money in it. I buy, I buy gold and I buy a house. I buy a car, I buy a watch, but I won't do the stock market.

• 2:33:54Joe Rogan?

  But it's crazy that everybody gets to be involved in like IBM.

• 2:33:57Speaker 01

  That is so weird to me.

• 2:33:59Joe Rogan?

  It's weird.

• 2:33:59Speaker 01

  But I'm not allowed to say this because people go, oh, no, Jordan, you gotta put it into a fund that is an index. And I'm like, I don't have to gamble. I grew up white trash. Gambling is a bad thing.

• 2:34:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but.

• 2:34:09Speaker 01

  In my family. You're not allowed to do that.

• 2:34:10Joe Rogan?

  The thing is, it is a real thing and it does work. Look at Nancy Pelosi. She's got half a billion dollars. Right? She did it a shady way.

• 2:34:17Speaker 01

  Is that good that she has that?

• 2:34:19Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:34:19Speaker 01

  It's not good.

• 2:34:20Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:34:20Speaker 01

  My friends who are like.

• 2:34:21Joe Rogan?

  It's not gonna make her live longer. She's, she's 82 fucking years old. She looks terrible.

• 2:34:25Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:34:26Joe Rogan?

  It's like, it's, the end is nigh. Stop working.

• 2:34:28Speaker 01

  And my friends are like, I made 50 grand off Bitcoin. And I'm like, you just put it back into Bitcoin. You're gonna keep it in Bitcoin because now you're stuck in an addiction until it's gone, until it tanks. You know what I mean? Nobody that I know is like, I'm pulling out. Maybe a couple.

• 2:34:41Joe Rogan?

  Some people have and they've made a lot of money.

• 2:34:43Speaker 01

  That's great. Yeah. I have one friend who did that. Very proud of him. But typically it keeps you in it.

• 2:34:47Joe Rogan?

  It's like the same people that stay off social media. They're rare.

• 2:34:50Speaker 01

  They're rare, but they utilize the system.

• 2:34:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:34:54Speaker 01

  When I was microdosing, I could do that. I could post and be like.

• 2:34:56Joe Rogan?

  Why'd you stop microdosing?

• 2:34:58Speaker 01

  Because I was, I was in and out of a relationship that when I would microdose would, my brain would be like, bro, what are you doing? You gotta get out of this thing. And I'd be like, okay, just want to microdose. But now I'm, now I'm back to it.

• 2:35:11Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 2:35:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:35:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Well, I get that.

• 2:35:14Speaker 01

  When it shows you a truth that you cannot handle.

• 2:35:16Joe Rogan?

  And you're like, yikes, but I don't want to be alone.

• 2:35:17Speaker 01

  I would take the mushrooms and they'd be like, you're bad. Come on, dude. This guy is like mean to you. You're a cool chick. And I'd be like, shut up. I'm not cool.

• 2:35:25Joe Rogan?

  The mean to you is gross.

• 2:35:27Speaker 01

  I'm so, it's the best though. It's my favorite thing.

• 2:35:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:35:30Speaker 01

  Yeah. I hate.

• 2:35:31Joe Rogan?

  Back and forth?

• 2:35:32Speaker 01

  I like fighting, yeah.

• 2:35:33Joe Rogan?

  Fighting and the makeup sex?

• 2:35:35Speaker 01

  I just like somebody who's very honest and is like, that's a stupid thing that you did. That's a good thing that you did.

• 2:35:39Joe Rogan?

  There's a way to do it with tact.

• 2:35:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 2:35:42Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you gotta be able to do it with someone where you calm them down and say it rationally.

• 2:35:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:35:47Joe Rogan?

  And you gotta say you love them first. And you gotta say nice things first.

• 2:35:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, that was the problem. There was none of that. Yeah, totally. But the mushrooms would be like, it would become, I'd be immediately be lucid and be like, you can love a person and not be miserable. That, those two things can happen at once. You can love somebody and not be in a relationship with them because it doesn't work. So I was like, okay, we're not gonna microdose.

• 2:36:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I'm on the fence about microdosing, but I think for some people, it seems to be a giant quality of life enhancer.

• 2:36:13Speaker 01

  It just tells you when to stop. You can't do it that long. You can do it for like two weeks.

• 2:36:17Joe Rogan?

  Microdosing?

• 2:36:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, and then it like doesn't do shit. And then you have to stop.

• 2:36:21Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's probably good, too. It's probably like most things. You know, you shouldn't drink every day. If you wanna go on a vacation for two weeks, you're gonna get hammered.

• 2:36:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:36:30Joe Rogan?

  It's good.

• 2:36:31Speaker 01

  But the mushrooms will be like, I mean, they'll just be like, dude, why do you? You, it, it, it never gets addicting.

• 2:36:39Speaker 01

  But I did it a lot during the pandemic and it helped.

• 2:36:41Joe Rogan?

  I know some people that got addicted to the idea of like spiritual awakening.

• 2:36:45Speaker 01

  Oh, the ayahuasca people.

• 2:36:47Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. Some of those people get cooked. They get cooked. They get overcooked and they start reading poetry on Instagram. You're like, yo.

• 2:36:54Speaker 01

  Oh, my God. When I get the text messages, like, hey, I love you so much. I'm like, damn, we did another ayahuasca journey.

• 2:37:01Joe Rogan?

  No, that's cool, though. Someone just saying they love you is nice.

• 2:37:04Speaker 01

  That's nice.

• 2:37:05Joe Rogan?

  Ari sent me an I love you message the other day. I was like, what were you on? He's like, Molly.

• 2:37:09Speaker 01

  That's, dude, he's gone for a while, right? He's like in South America or something?

• 2:37:14Joe Rogan?

  He's off the fucking reservation.

• 2:37:16Speaker 01

  He is so inspiring to me with comedy, where he'll be like, I'm taking, I'm stop, I'm not doing it right now.

• 2:37:21Joe Rogan?

  Well, he's very smart.

• 2:37:23Speaker 01

  He's so smart.

• 2:37:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's very smart.

• 2:37:25Speaker 01

  He did the whole, I mean, Eric Abrams and my whole team did it, but Ari, like, every step of the way would be calling me every day and be like, what are you doing? Do this. And I'd be like, I don't know what I'm doing. He'd be like, tell everybody to pause, do the, I mean, it was crazy.

• 2:37:37Joe Rogan?

  Ari's very strong in his beliefs. Some of his opinions are terrible, though. Ari famously told me to never, uh, put out a three-hour podcast. You gotta edit it. In the beginning, he goes, why is your podcast three hours? And I said, she says, that's how I felt like talking for three hours. You should edit it. No one's gonna listen for three hours.

• 2:37:55Speaker 01

  Three hours when you were just starting it out?

• 2:37:57Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. Um, I always did it three hours. Like, they don't have to.

• 2:38:01Speaker 01

  How long have we done this?

• 2:38:01Joe Rogan?

  Don't listen. Almost three hours.

• 2:38:03Speaker 01

  Jesus, no.

• 2:38:04Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:38:06Speaker 01

  How do you do that? It is a time warp.

• 2:38:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, because we're locked in. So if you're really locked in, if you haven't really locked in with someone, you really haven't, it seems like three hours.

• 2:38:15Speaker 01

  What if you don't get locked in?

• 2:38:17Joe Rogan?

  It happens sometimes.

• 2:38:18Speaker 01

  Really?

• 2:38:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, some podcasts are duds.

• 2:38:20Speaker 01

  Women?

• 2:38:21Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:38:21Speaker 01

  Men too?

• 2:38:22Joe Rogan?

  Sure.

• 2:38:23Speaker 01

  Non-comics?

• 2:38:23Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, non-comics, even some comics, you're like, God, I have nothing in common with this guy. You know?

• 2:38:29Speaker 01

  Brutal, that's like when I'm in therapy and I'm talking about yet another breakup and my therapist says, it's the worst feeling ever, and I'm like, we need to lock in right now.

• 2:38:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, lock it in.

• 2:38:37Speaker 01

  But you've had not-lock-in days? Have you ever had it be your fault?

• 2:38:40Joe Rogan?

  Oh, I guess, probably, yeah.

• 2:38:43Speaker 01

  What do you do?

• 2:38:44Joe Rogan?

  I mean, I try, I mean, at this point, I'm pretty good at it, so I know like how to finagle a conversation, you know, generally, I look for a blunt, I'm like, okay, I gotta get this.

• 2:38:54Speaker 01

  Oh, I have to change my brain?

• 2:38:55Joe Rogan?

  I gotta fucking fire this up and make fun of this.

• 2:38:58Speaker 01

  Oh, you're pro-weed, you're weed guy?

• 2:38:59Joe Rogan?

  I love weed.

• 2:39:00Speaker 01

  You love weed?

• 2:39:01Joe Rogan?

  Oh, I love it.

• 2:39:01Speaker 01

  Okay, I just started using weed for sleep and...

• 2:39:04Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's weird for sleep.

• 2:39:06Speaker 01

  Okay, but it's the only thing that's ever worked, ever.

• 2:39:07Joe Rogan?

  Oh, really? Do you use edibles?

• 2:39:10Speaker 01

  Flour the other day, edibles the other day, indica.

• 2:39:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but the thing is, I think it prevents you from going into REM sleep, or it hinders your REM sleep.

• 2:39:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, but it lets you watch, it lets you watch yourself enter sleep, which rules. Like, being like, "End goodbye," is sick. Because every morning you wake up and you go, I don't remember falling asleep, but on weed, you're like, this is it, here it is.

• 2:39:33Joe Rogan?

  Here we go.

• 2:39:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's sick.

• 2:39:35Joe Rogan?

  No, I know a lot of people that use it for sleep. I know a lot of people that always hated weed and used to like, when I would smoke, they were like, why, what, weed makes you lazy? I'm like, it doesn't, I'm telling you, it doesn't. You're lazy. Weed does not make you lazy.

• 2:39:48Speaker 01

  That's me, I always thought weed makes you lazy, but I'm using it for sleep.

• 2:39:51Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I thought it too, until I was 30. I met my friend Eddie, my friend Eddie Bravo was the one who got me high for the first time when I was like 30 years old. I hadn't gotten high since, I think I got high like maybe a small handful of times when I was a comedian, when I first started doing comedy, rather, and then before I was a comedian. Like, maybe my whole life, maybe seven, eight times ever being high, ever.

• 2:40:16Speaker 01

  Would you panic?

• 2:40:17Joe Rogan?

  No, I just didn't like not being in control.

• 2:40:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:40:21Joe Rogan?

  You know, I always associated people who did drugs with people who never got anything done, and they were a bunch of fucking losers, and I never wanted to be that.

• 2:40:30Speaker 01

  If you smoked a blunt right now, you would have no fear that it could turn a bad way?

• 2:40:36Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:40:38Speaker 01

  You don't have any of the like, my heart's gonna stop, I can hear my blood in my ears.

• 2:40:42Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no.

• 2:40:43Speaker 01

  You don't have any of that?

• 2:40:44Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no, no.

• 2:40:45Speaker 01

  Have you ever?

• 2:40:46Joe Rogan?

  Sure, I've gotten paranoid before, yeah.

• 2:40:48Speaker 01

  But you just ride it out?

• 2:40:49Joe Rogan?

  Well, I had to figure out why. And generally, it's like, there's something bothering me in life. There's something. So the real thing about it is, like, it exposes something that's bothering you. Well, you should go probably fix that.

• 2:41:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, but what if the thing that's bothering you is that you can't deal with the fact that you have skin? You know what I mean? Like, that's what happens to me when I smoke weed is I'm like, this shit has gotta go. It's crazy.

• 2:41:12Joe Rogan?

  You have a different mind than me, I guess. I mean, that's the thing, I wouldn't recommend it for everybody. I know people who can't smoke. They don't like being paranoid. I like it. I like being a little scared.

• 2:41:22Speaker 01

  Some of you fuckers love that shit.

• 2:41:23Joe Rogan?

  I like being a little scared.

• 2:41:24Speaker 01

  Because then after the panic, you're like, I'm good now.

• 2:41:27Joe Rogan?

  You're good, but also, it's good to know, like, maybe you have blinders on and there's some real vulnerabilities in the world, and you should probably consider them sometimes.

• 2:41:38Speaker 01

  So you've never had a crazy one that you were like, that's not right, that's crazy?

• 2:41:42Joe Rogan?

  No, not that bad. I've just been real paranoid before. Just super high, like, yikes. And then you calm down, you're like, whew. Once it's over, you're fine.

• 2:41:51Speaker 01

  It's crazy for you to be paranoid, because you're like, one of the people that should be paranoid. You have, like, Lizard Man coming after you or whatever his name is.

• 2:41:56Joe Rogan?

  Uh.

• 2:42:00Speaker 01

  What's his name, lizard guy?

• 2:42:01Joe Rogan?

  Liver King.

• 2:42:02Speaker 01

  Liver King? What happened to him?

• 2:42:05Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, if anybody should be paranoid, I should probably be a little paranoid. But anybody in the public eye should be a little paranoid. Anybody, you included.

• 2:42:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, I've gotten high and deleted some stuff.

• 2:42:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:42:16Speaker 01

  For sure, but like, whoa, this has gotta come down.

• 2:42:19Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's, I think marijuana is a tool, like everything else. I think you can learn things from it. And I think it's, uh, it's like steroids for comedy. You can come up with some stuff when you're high that I don't think is available.

• 2:42:32Speaker 01

  Really?

• 2:42:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I don't think those thoughts are available if you're sober. There's things that I wrote that I wrote when I was high that I was like, there's no way I was writing that without any help.

• 2:42:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, I guess I've had it a little bit, but I have to hit the sweet spot or I go right into panic mode.

• 2:42:46Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, the sweet spot.

• 2:42:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:42:47Joe Rogan?

  That's the key.

• 2:42:48Speaker 01

  You know what helps me if I always have a Xanax somewhere?

• 2:42:51Joe Rogan?

  Oh no!

• 2:42:52Speaker 01

  Like it just exists in my house.

• 2:42:54Joe Rogan?

  Oh, so you know?

• 2:42:54Speaker 01

  So I just know that there's a, yeah, bullet that I can pull.

• 2:42:57Joe Rogan?

  That's a crazy one. That's a scary addictive one.

• 2:43:00Speaker 01

  Xanax is so addictive.

• 2:43:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Jordan Peterson, speaking of which, he was on that shit.

• 2:43:05Speaker 01

  I thought he was Conde- Conde Bar. Con- Conopin.

• 2:43:10Speaker 01

  I thought he was on them Condegs.

• 2:43:12Joe Rogan?

  Well, he was definitely on benzodiazepine for a long time.

• 2:43:16Speaker 01

  That shit rules.

• 2:43:18Joe Rogan?

  That's Xanax. And so, that's one of the ones where you get off of Xanax where you, uh, you could die. There's only a couple of drugs where if you get off of it, you could die. Alcohol's another one.

• 2:43:29Speaker 01

  Alcohol's one, yeah.

• 2:43:30Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but Xanax is another one. And it's really hard for people.

• 2:43:33Speaker 01

  Dude, I bought Conopin in Mexico and I was like, "I'm just gonna use this when I have a panic attack." Done. Done in two weeks. Every night I was being like, "Well, I might as well take a little bit. I feel a little ang-." And I was like, "Oh, you need to never allow this around you." I got a Xanax the other day and my friend was like, "You can have as many as you want." And I was like, "I need one and never give me another again." Cause this is a thing that I'll keep it just in case.

• 2:43:55Joe Rogan?

  Just like break glass in case of war.

• 2:43:57Speaker 01

  Break glass. It's a break glass pill. Yeah, totally.

• 2:43:59Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:43:59Speaker 01

  Or else I fuck- Benzos are fucking, dude.

• 2:44:02Joe Rogan?

  I've heard.

• 2:44:03Speaker 01

  You've never done it?

• 2:44:04Joe Rogan?

  No. I was on a flight once with a lady and she, uh, she, she said, "There is nothing in this world that's better than a Xanax and a glass of wine."

• 2:44:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:44:13Joe Rogan?

  And I was like, "I don't think you're supposed to drink with Xanax." She's like, "Nope."

• 2:44:16Speaker 01

  It's so sick, dude.

• 2:44:18Joe Rogan?

  She didn't give a fuck. That lady didn't give a fuck.

• 2:44:19Speaker 01

  What was what I did the other day? Poppers?

• 2:44:21Joe Rogan?

  Oh no. Amyl nitrate?

• 2:44:23Speaker 01

  Poppers. Dude, I had no idea. Cause I don't do anything.

• 2:44:26Joe Rogan?

  Phew.

• 2:44:27Speaker 01

  And I was dancing at a, at a wedding and my gay friend was like, "Sniff these."

• 2:44:32Joe Rogan?

  Oh, gay guys love that.

• 2:44:33Speaker 01

  The best.

• 2:44:34Joe Rogan?

  They love the poppers.

• 2:44:35Speaker 01

  Just a mini rave for a second?

• 2:44:38Joe Rogan?

  How much did you do?

• 2:44:39Speaker 01

  A lot.

• 2:44:42Joe Rogan?

  How many times did you do it?

• 2:44:44Speaker 01

  Um, enough where I felt fucked up. Like five.

• 2:44:47Joe Rogan?

  Wow, I think it gives you like instant brain damage.

• 2:44:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's what it felt like, that's what it felt like.

• 2:44:51Joe Rogan?

  I think it does. I think it's like it cooks your brain.

• 2:44:54Speaker 01

  It's really, it's gotta be bad. Because I went from being such a downer to being like, marriage is stupid. I mean like, it was crazy. I was dragging people in, yeah. But that's like the brain damage from the boxing where you're like, dude, sometimes I need to be a little stupid for a second. Or else I'm just constantly being like, society is evil.

• 2:45:12Joe Rogan?

  I wonder what's worse for you, amyl nitrate or boxing?

• 2:45:16Speaker 01

  I don't know.

• 2:45:16Joe Rogan?

  What is, what's the side effects of amyl nitrate? Cause I know a lot of the gay fellows like it when they bottom.

• 2:45:23Speaker 04

  What it's actually made for is to relieve pain of angina attacks.

• 2:45:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 2:45:28Speaker 04

  Which I don't even know if I get that.

• 2:45:30Joe Rogan?

  What is angina?

• 2:45:31Speaker 01

  What the fuck?

• 2:45:32Joe Rogan?

  I thought that was like digestive.

• 2:45:33Speaker 01

  Part between your anus and your vagina.

• 2:45:38Speaker 01

  Angina?

• 2:45:39Joe Rogan?

  What is the side effects of amyl nitrate abuse?

• 2:45:42Speaker 04

  Angina attacks is chest pain, discomfort caused by reduced blood flow to the heart.

• 2:45:46Joe Rogan?

  Oh, okay. And so amyl nitrate reduces that? That's the?

• 2:45:50Speaker 04

  Reduces the pain of it.

• 2:45:52Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 2:45:52Speaker 04

  Cause it relaxes the blood vessels and increases the blood and oxygen to the heart.

• 2:45:56Joe Rogan?

  Also relaxes that booty hole.

• 2:45:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, it makes the butthole open.

• 2:45:59Joe Rogan?

  Woo!

• 2:46:00Speaker 01

  I was worried I was gonna shit my pants when I did it, but yeah, but I didn't do it.

• 2:46:03Joe Rogan?

  I think other things have to happen for you to shit your pants.

• 2:46:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, a gay man has to try and have sex with me.

• 2:46:07Joe Rogan?

  Someone has to pound you in the asshole. Um, side effects, headaches, dizziness, flushing, rapid heart rate.

• 2:46:15Speaker 01

  I got stuck on the ground.

• 2:46:16Joe Rogan?

  More severe risk, life threatening blood condition called methamoglobinemia. Say that, help me out.

• 2:46:31Joe Rogan?

  Uh, and dangerous drops in blood pressure, especially when combined with other drugs. Hmm. Does it cause brain damage? Google does, does amyl nitrate brain damage?

• 2:46:41Speaker 01

  Dude, you better say that it does, or else I'm doing that right now.

• 2:46:45Speaker 04

  Damage didn't come right up.

• 2:46:47Joe Rogan?

  Hmm, interesting.

• 2:46:48Speaker 01

  Oh, fuck.

• 2:46:50Joe Rogan?

  Let's see. It can cause both acute and long-term brain damage. Why wouldn't it come up immediately? Primarily through two, long-term, acute and long-term brain damage. Primarily through two mechanisms, oxygen deprivation and direct neurotoxicity. Severe or prolonged exposure can lead to permanent cognitive and neurological issues.

• 2:47:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, you feel that immediately when you sniff it. You're like, yeah.

• 2:47:15Joe Rogan?

  This can't be good.

• 2:47:17Speaker 01

  This is, it feels like somebody's hitting it back in bed and you're like, duh. It's so crazy. It's like Whippets.

• 2:47:22Joe Rogan?

  Oh, but way more, right? Way stronger, right?

• 2:47:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, lasts way longer.

• 2:47:25Joe Rogan?

  I did Whippets at Newport Creamery place that I worked at, because we had like real Whippets.

• 2:47:30Speaker 01

  Like whipped cream?

• 2:47:31Joe Rogan?

  Giant whipped cream canister, like a huge one.

• 2:47:34Speaker 01

  That's sick.

• 2:47:34Joe Rogan?

  Like the real things where you make the whipped cream, we'd have to pour the sugar and pour the cream and then mix it. Yeah.

• 2:47:40Speaker 01

  If I do that with a whipped cream bottle, aren't you not allowed to use any of the whipped cream? That's always been my problem.

• 2:47:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, we had the gas. We had the actual gas back there. We had, one of the kids that we worked with was a total dirtbag and he knew how to get high off the gas. We would all go back there and get high with this guy.

• 2:47:55Speaker 01

  That's so fun. That's, I used-

• 2:47:57Joe Rogan?

  I always did it like once or twice, because you, you, you hit it and you're like, you're like have like almost like an out of body, like whoa.

• 2:48:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:48:05Joe Rogan?

  You're like, whoa!

• 2:48:06Speaker 01

  It's awesome. Yeah.

• 2:48:08Joe Rogan?

  And it only lasts like fifteen, twenty seconds and I was like, oh my god, you're dumb enough as it is. Don't get dumber.

• 2:48:13Speaker 01

  Right, it's always the idiots in the back of the-

• 2:48:14Joe Rogan?

  While you're working at the ice cream place.

• 2:48:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just used to get so high. I used to smoke a blunt every morning before school and I just would get, I was so crazy stupid. And then when I got older, my brain was just like, you can't have any more of this. If you do, you're gonna bite your tongue off.

• 2:48:29Joe Rogan?

  It's definitely, probably not good for kids.

• 2:48:33Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, we were so high.

• 2:48:34Joe Rogan?

  Getting high all the time with your kids, it's like, god. Like, you're developing. Your brain's developing while it's constantly being bombarded by THC. That's not good.

• 2:48:42Speaker 01

  My dad was just such a weed guy. He was like a- You can smoke weed with me whenever you want.

• 2:48:47Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's funny.

• 2:48:47Speaker 01

  Have you smoked weed with your kids ever?

• 2:48:49Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:48:50Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:48:51Joe Rogan?

  But I told them, we've had conversations about drugs. And I said, the most important thing is stay away from any and all pills for a bunch of reasons. Not just because what the pill supposedly is, is bad for you. But because I bet what's in that pill is not what's supposed to be in there because of fentanyl. And they know that.

• 2:49:09Speaker 01

  And powder, coke is fucked.

• 2:49:11Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. Coke is fucked.

• 2:49:12Speaker 01

  I think coke is the worst.

• 2:49:13Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's all fentanyl now. It's all, there's so much fentanyl and there's fake Xanax's and they're all fentanyl. There's molly, fake molly, it's all fentanyl.

• 2:49:24Speaker 01

  And the fentanyl, if it's small enough, is fine.

• 2:49:27Joe Rogan?

  Wow, it's so much, it's so small, the amount that can kill you. Have you seen the amount of fentanyl that is lethal?

• 2:49:33Speaker 01

  That that cop showed?

• 2:49:35Joe Rogan?

  No, like have you ever seen like in comparison to a penny? There's a photograph on the internet of the amount of fentanyl in comparison to a penny that's lethal. That will 100% put you in the fucking ground. And it's so small.

• 2:49:48Speaker 01

  It's the best feeling ever, though, when you go under for surgery and they give it to you.

• 2:49:51Joe Rogan?

  Is it?

• 2:49:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:49:53Joe Rogan?

  Where'd you get surgery on? Did they give you fentanyl?

• 2:49:54Speaker 01

  I used to be so, I was so fat that I had all this skin and I got it cut off.

• 2:50:00Joe Rogan?

  How painful was that?

• 2:50:01Speaker 01

  Afterwards, brutal. They should kind of shuttled me out pretty fast. They were like, alright, go ahead, open up. It was crazy.

• 2:50:08Joe Rogan?

  Draining?

• 2:50:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:50:09Joe Rogan?

  Go home and drain.

• 2:50:10Speaker 01

  Draining. Yeah, yeah. It had to go, though. It was in the way.

• 2:50:15Joe Rogan?

  Must be happy now, right, that you did it?

• 2:50:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally. It was stuck in my, it was getting in my zipper.

• 2:50:19Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yo.

• 2:50:20Speaker 01

  I was having to tuck in. Yeah, like a dick. It was awful.

• 2:50:23Joe Rogan?

  Ouchie. I've only caught my dick in my zipper like two or three times in my life.

• 2:50:27Speaker 01

  That's brutal.

• 2:50:28Joe Rogan?

  It's not fun.

• 2:50:29Speaker 01

  How do you catch it in there?

• 2:50:34Speaker 01

  Wait, why is your dick up that high? Oh, I see, baggy pants?

• 2:50:37Joe Rogan?

  But you're just not paying attention, like going raw dog?

• 2:50:41Speaker 01

  It's weird that you guys have a whole external package down there. You just have balls on the outside.

• 2:50:45Joe Rogan?

  Balls on the outside is the dumbest fucking invention of all time.

• 2:50:47Speaker 01

  I'm sorry about that. The itchiness and the wetness.

• 2:50:50Joe Rogan?

  That's not the problem. The problem is getting kicked there.

• 2:50:52Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:50:53Joe Rogan?

  That's the problem.

• 2:50:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, but that we, that evolution had to give you that. You had that something.

• 2:50:57Joe Rogan?

  I guess.

• 2:50:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:50:58Joe Rogan?

  I guess.

• 2:50:59Speaker 01

  We have so many problems.

• 2:51:00Joe Rogan?

  It's just to keep them from overheating. Because he needs sperm.

• 2:51:03Speaker 01

  Where they hang.

• 2:51:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, they have to be able to cool in the breeze. Because if they're getting overheated, it's not good for you.

• 2:51:11Speaker 01

  It's crazy that you just have a unit dangling off your body that's keeping it's it's crazy.

• 2:51:16Joe Rogan?

  And it's the most vulnerable part of your body, other than your eyeballs.

• 2:51:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:51:20Joe Rogan?

  It's just hanging out there.

• 2:51:21Speaker 01

  It helps, though. Men are very intimidating. It helps that you guys have that, honestly.

• 2:51:25Joe Rogan?

  Do you have a spot to hit?

• 2:51:26Speaker 01

  Totally. It helps. I don't think we would mate with you easily without the balls.

• 2:51:30Joe Rogan?

  Interesting.

• 2:51:31Speaker 01

  Sometimes when the penis goes in and the balls touch you, you go, oh, yeah, he's just a person. This is safe. You know what I mean? Because you have two squishy guys that are like, don't worry about this fucker. He's he's just hard, you know? But it helps us remember that you're fallible.

• 2:51:45Joe Rogan?

  The balls do.

• 2:51:46Speaker 01

  Totally. If you guys were just rods running around, we'd be like, go away!

• 2:51:50Joe Rogan?

  Well, imagine if you didn't have to get hard to have sex. Like, you didn't have to be aroused. That would be crazy. Like, animals. Animals just have a bone.

• 2:51:59Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 2:52:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:52:01Speaker 01

  How do they? They don't have to get hard?

• 2:52:03Joe Rogan?

  Uh-uh.

• 2:52:04Speaker 01

  Dogs get the red rocket.

• 2:52:05Joe Rogan?

  But they have a bone, though.

• 2:52:07Speaker 01

  Ew!

• 2:52:08Joe Rogan?

  There's a bone in there.

• 2:52:08Speaker 01

  In there?

• 2:52:09Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:52:10Speaker 01

  You could break your dog's dick?

• 2:52:11Joe Rogan?

  What is that bone called, again? We have one out there. A giant fossilized walrus bone. Baculum. Baculum, that's right. It's a bone, yeah. I think all animals have it, except for human beings.

• 2:52:22Speaker 01

  Monkeys can't have it.

• 2:52:23Joe Rogan?

  Do monkeys have a baculum? Probably not. They're always jacking off.

• 2:52:28Speaker 01

  They're always jacking off, dude. Every zoo you go to, you have to cover the children's eyes.

• 2:52:33Joe Rogan?

  Chimps, gorillas, monkeys, oh, everything. It's like, it's designed to be jacked off. It's right there where your hand drops.

• 2:52:40Speaker 01

  That's...

• 2:52:42Joe Rogan?

  Some species?

• 2:52:44Speaker 01

  But they're like, little fuzzy ones. Not the ones that look like us.

• 2:52:46Joe Rogan?

  Deer have it, right? I'm pretty sure deer do. Matter of fact, I know they do. And so do, like, moose and elk and what mammals don't?

• 2:52:58Joe Rogan?

  Primates, oh, it's present in some species within the orders of primates. Rodents and carnivora. I don't know what that is. Bears, dogs, and walruses all have a bone. Because like, you don't have time to get hard, okay? You're out there in the wild. Shit's crazy.

• 2:53:14Speaker 01

  What, they just slide it in?

• 2:53:15Joe Rogan?

  Just ram it in there. Brrr.

• 2:53:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:53:17Joe Rogan?

  Ahhh.

• 2:53:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:53:20Speaker 04

  I was just thinking that would be a really funny, if that's where the term, if you lack a backbone. The back.

• 2:53:24Joe Rogan?

  Ahhh.

• 2:53:26Speaker 01

  Grow a backbone?

• 2:53:27Speaker 04

  I don't think that's where it comes from.

• 2:53:28Joe Rogan?

  I don't think so. Our primate ancestors did have one, suggesting it was lost through evolution. That's kinda weird. Probably lost when the aliens came down and manipulated us.

• 2:53:38Speaker 01

  When could, when was that lost? When women?

• 2:53:40Joe Rogan?

  Cats don't, really? Wow. But cats have like a hook dick where they get stuck.

• 2:53:45Speaker 01

  A barb?

• 2:53:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, have you ever heard cats where they're stuck together? Oooh, yeah. And they're fucking ass to ass and they can't get loose? They're fucking kicking each other? Not present in humans. Present in the penates of some primates. Gorillas and chimpanzees have baculums. Wow.

• 2:54:01Speaker 01

  What? Chimpanzees have them?

• 2:54:02Joe Rogan?

  Yep. Wow. Rodents, bats?

• 2:54:06Speaker 01

  When did we lose them? When it, what evolutionary step did we take to lose them?

• 2:54:09Joe Rogan?

  When the aliens came.

• 2:54:10Speaker 01

  I think it's probably when women started being like, that guy, I want that guy's genes and not that guy's.

• 2:54:16Joe Rogan?

  Hmm, maybe.

• 2:54:17Speaker 01

  Right? Because if, I kept getting loads blown in me by betas.

• 2:54:20Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:54:20Speaker 01

  It doesn't serve our population.

• 2:54:22Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:54:22Speaker 01

  I have to be like, that alpha male's sick.

• 2:54:24Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:54:24Speaker 01

  So I'm gonna rub my monkey butt.

• 2:54:25Joe Rogan?

  Like his dick.

• 2:54:27Speaker 01

  Whereas other species, it's like, it's a free for all.

• 2:54:30Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, other species also, it's, I bet we probably got rid of it as soon as we figured out habitation. So, as soon as we figured out homes and doors and we could structure, you know, like, keep people out.

• 2:54:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, and you'd be like, that monkey can't build a door. Yeah, totally.

• 2:54:44Speaker 04

  Her theory is, uh, in line with, I think, Richard Dawkins' theory, sort of.

• 2:54:49Joe Rogan?

  Ah, look at this. Proposed honest advertising as evolutionary explanation for the loss of the baculum. Hypothesis states that if erection failure is a sensitive early warning of ill health, aha, physical or mental, females could have gauged the health of a potential mate based on his ability to achieve erection without the support of a baculum.

• 2:55:07Speaker 01

  Everybody I date has penis problems. Every comic needs a blue chew, so I shouldn't be letting any of their baculums in my baculum.

• 2:55:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no.

• 2:55:15Speaker 01

  Dude, every-

• 2:55:15Joe Rogan?

  Are you only dating comics? Is that-

• 2:55:17Speaker 01

  I'm not anymore. I'm done. But that's what I've done forever. And musicians, which is the same thing.

• 2:55:21Joe Rogan?

  Basically.

• 2:55:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:55:22Joe Rogan?

  Same problem.

• 2:55:23Speaker 01

  But constant blue chew.

• 2:55:25Joe Rogan?

  Well-

• 2:55:25Speaker 01

  It's crazy to be at a group of comics.

• 2:55:27Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's a crazy new thing, right? Like, what did they do in the 60s?

• 2:55:32Speaker 01

  I think they said, "Hey, I have a problem where sometimes I don't get hard, and here's the things I could use from you to help." And now they just go, "Nope, I'm hard," which is psycho, dude.

• 2:55:41Joe Rogan?

  Here's the things that I could use from you to help, though, won't work on everybody. But this is like the selection thing. It would keep those guys from breeding.

• 2:55:49Speaker 01

  Oh, that's right.

• 2:55:50Joe Rogan?

  That's probably what it is. People of ill health. Like, there's probably a reason why your dick can't get hard.

• 2:55:54Speaker 01

  Blue chew dick is so weird. It feels like a strap-on. And it's attached to somebody who's anxious, and then it's just this rock-hard dick. It doesn't make sense.

• 2:56:04Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:56:04Speaker 01

  Because you're like, "This guy's afraid to be here, and that dick is not his dick." That's somebody else's fucking-

• 2:56:10Joe Rogan?

  He's afraid to be here. You get guys that are afraid.

• 2:56:13Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, totally. Where they're like, "Oh, it's not even..." Yeah, there's something about the stand-up and the... It's... I think people just think that I'm gonna be mean to them.

• 2:56:23Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's it, because you're funny.

• 2:56:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 2:56:27Joe Rogan?

  And if you're funnier than the guys you're fucking, that's a real problem.

• 2:56:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:56:30Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:56:31Speaker 01

  Which I don't think I've ever had sex with somebody above me in comedy.

• 2:56:34Joe Rogan?

  That's a problem.

• 2:56:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:56:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:56:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:56:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you're, "Huh, huh, huh."

• 2:56:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 2:56:39Joe Rogan?

  They're scared of you?

• 2:56:40Speaker 01

  I think they're scared of me, and they also are scared of... Yeah, I think it's mainly they're scared of looking foolish and having me be like-

• 2:56:46Joe Rogan?

  Right, and then you're in her act.

• 2:56:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally. Dude, the amount of dating app people that are like, "I don't want to be in your act." I'm like, "Fuck, we've never even met, you piece of shit." It's so crazy how many people say that.

• 2:56:58Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, the dating app thing is wild.

• 2:57:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:57:02Joe Rogan?

  When I see people just like constantly scrolling and picking people and choosing people, my single friends that are on dating apps, that's an addiction unto itself because there's always someone waiting.

• 2:57:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:57:13Joe Rogan?

  There's always some new, this is not, I don't like the way she smiles. Fuck this. I'm out of here. And then next thing you know, you've got three or four more dates lined up and...

• 2:57:21Speaker 01

  Well, it's ruined dating because everybody has a queue of people they can date. So they go on a date. I know so many people who are like, I walked out after five minutes. And I'm like,

• 2:57:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh, God.

• 2:57:29Speaker 01

  You don't know that person and also it'd probably benefit you to have an hour-long conversation with somebody like,

• 2:57:34Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:57:34Speaker 01

  As opposed to being like, sorry, we're not compatible.

• 2:57:36Joe Rogan?

  Right, but I think women are worried about guys getting fixated on them and then not leaving them alone.

• 2:57:41Speaker 01

  It is brutal.

• 2:57:42Joe Rogan?

  And then texting them and fucking with them and then being mean when they get rejected.

• 2:57:46Speaker 01

  Dude, that's the best. The DMs I have that are like, just please, we love it. I love you so much. And then whore. And I'm like, wow. I never have responded once. It's crazy. They do get fixated for sure.

• 2:57:58Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:57:58Speaker 01

  But then you, yeah, but then you have to, then it teaches you to set boundaries, which is good to be like, hey, man, I'm not going to text with you anymore. You gotta chill.

• 2:58:05Joe Rogan?

  All that's gonna go away when you put on the headset.

• 2:58:08Speaker 01

  I know.

• 2:58:09Joe Rogan?

  When it goes,

• 2:58:11Joe Rogan?

  we all lock in.

• 2:58:12Speaker 01

  And we'll go, and we'll just be able to tell them fuck off.

• 2:58:15Joe Rogan?

  Well, you're gonna read their minds too. You're gonna know, oh, my God, this guy's a total sociopath. He doesn't give a fuck about anybody but himself. Everything he's saying is a lie.

• 2:58:22Speaker 01

  But that's so fucked up. For people with OCD who are like, what if I kill that cat? And they just get...

• 2:58:26Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no. You'll probably be able to see why they think that way. Like, oh, no, no, no, you're okay. Like, you're just freaking out. And maybe you won't think that way when you're embraced by this hive mind. Maybe you'll abandon all that. Maybe that'll be like one of the great side effects of it.

• 2:58:41Speaker 01

  It would be good for people, like, my best friend was paralyzed from the C2 down, and it'd be good to read her mind and be like, what is actually the pain coming from?

• 2:58:50Joe Rogan?

  Hmm.

• 2:58:50Speaker 01

  Because she was like, I don't know if there's pain.

• 2:58:53Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:58:53Speaker 01

  You know?

• 2:58:54Joe Rogan?

  Well, we had the guy on who had the very first Neuralink, and he's paralyzed. He paralyzed like a diving accident. And, um,

• 2:59:02Speaker 01

  Oof.

• 2:59:03Joe Rogan?

  He uses his head now to control his computer. Like, he can play video games with just the chip, so he can't move his arms. And he's playing video games. And he says, it's like, I have an aimbot. Because I can point to what I want to shoot and like immediately shoot at it.

• 2:59:18Speaker 01

  Eye movement?

• 2:59:19Joe Rogan?

  His brain. His brain moves the cursor around.

• 2:59:23Speaker 01

  That's awesome. How?

• 2:59:26Joe Rogan?

  I don't know.

• 2:59:27Speaker 01

  Like, he just moves it around. I can feel like I can do it.

• 2:59:28Joe Rogan?

  Somehow or another, the way the computer interfaces with the neurochip, so the brain interfaces with the chip, which interfaces with the computer, and somehow or another, you can control movement. And they're getting better and better at it.

• 2:59:42Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 2:59:43Joe Rogan?

  Which is a problem for the people that got the first one. Okay, you're gonna be able to pull that out and give me a new one?

• 2:59:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:59:48Joe Rogan?

  Or is this the one? And I asked him about that. I was like, is this like it? And he's like, I think this is the only one that I can get. I mean, maybe as technology advances, they'll be able to take this one out and put a new one in. But at one point in time, like, the wires were coming out, and it wasn't working anymore, and so they had to, like, re-inject them back in.

• 3:00:07Speaker 01

  Shove them back in there? That's crazy. I mean, we started doing that with back pain, right? Where people stick it in to fix the nerves in your back?

• 3:00:15Joe Rogan?

  Do they?

• 3:00:16Speaker 01

  Yeah. My uncle had that.

• 3:00:17Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's the ultimate goal of Neuralink, is to restore movement. It's gonna be able to replace your entire spinal system. You'll be able to, this thing will tell your muscles and your brain to fire. So if you're breaking your spinal cord, it'll be able to bridge that, and you'll be able to use your body like you normally would. This is like the ultimate goal.

• 3:00:36Speaker 01

  That's gonna piss me off if this comes out after, because my paralyzed friend's passed away. I hate that when this stuff comes out. I'm like, God, you motherfucker.

• 3:00:44Joe Rogan?

  It's always gonna happen that way.

• 3:00:45Speaker 01

  She was getting into stuff, though. She was getting into ear, ear, ear touch.

• 3:00:50Joe Rogan?

  If you touch her ears, she'd get pumped?

• 3:00:52Speaker 01

  Yeah. That was the thing. She was getting into all that shit. She had, like, a servant that would make art for her. That was awesome. So she kinda had it. She kinda had her own little Neuralink of girls that she paid.

• 3:01:04Joe Rogan?

  We're probably about five years away from an unrecognizable world.

• 3:01:07Speaker 01

  You think five years?

• 3:01:09Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm. Yeah.

• 3:01:11Speaker 01

  What about structures?

• 3:01:12Joe Rogan?

  I mean, it'll be recognizable in terms of buildings, but I think, like, the way the world interfaces, the way we interface with the world's gonna be very different.

• 3:01:21Speaker 01

  You think it's like walk into a space and it'll be like, welcome, Jordan Jensen. We have...

• 3:01:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Yeah, probably weirder than that, because there probably won't be people working there.

• 3:01:30Speaker 01

  Bro, the Waymo is sick.

• 3:01:32Joe Rogan?

  You like it?

• 3:01:33Speaker 01

  I thought, I was so against it. I got in it, not having to talk to some fucker, being able to fart at will.

• 3:01:38Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 3:01:38Speaker 01

  Just, but here's what I'm wondering. Why don't people go take me to an hour place away and just fuck in it? It's gotta be cheaper than a hotel.

• 3:01:46Joe Rogan?

  I bet people do.

• 3:01:48Speaker 01

  Gross.

• 3:01:50Speaker 04

  This won't go on the freeway yet, but people are definitely doing all that stuff.

• 3:01:52Speaker 01

  Really?

• 3:01:53Joe Rogan?

  They're probably fucking, there's gotta be cameras filming people fucking.

• 3:01:56Speaker 04

  There's cameras and people don't care, I think they just...

• 3:01:57Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they're like, "Let's go, put on the fucking Nixon mask and fuck, let's go."

• 3:02:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:02:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:02:03Speaker 01

  But I really like them.

• 3:02:04Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's certainly probably safer, you know, they don't really get in that many accidents. If they do, it's usually somebody else's fault, not the Waymo's fault.

• 3:02:11Speaker 01

  I'm sick of looking at plane pilots and being like, "That's, he's gonna be bad, this is gonna be bad." LA, I had one that was so caked up, his ass was so amazing, it was the worst flight of my life. I was like, "Yeah, we can't have these LA beautiful Barbies doing this." He was like a perfect Kendall, and I was like, "This is crazy."

• 3:02:29Joe Rogan?

  They're gonna be replaced.

• 3:02:31Speaker 01

  Great.

• 3:02:31Joe Rogan?

  They're gonna be replaced with AI. AI's gonna fly all the planes.

• 3:02:34Speaker 01

  I would love that. I hate the idea of these guys getting sleepies.

• 3:02:38Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 3:02:38Speaker 01

  I hate that. No, that's a big part of plane crashes.

• 3:02:41Joe Rogan?

  How about they have strokes? They got that fifth booster and they fucking stroke out while they're...

• 3:02:46Speaker 01

  Does that happen?

• 3:02:46Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah.

• 3:02:47Speaker 01

  No.

• 3:02:48Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, yeah, people are stroked out while they're flying.

• 3:02:50Speaker 01

  I'm not religious, but the private plane thing freaks me out because I'm worried that if God were to smite one of the planes, he'd be like, "Yeah, the comic who thinks they're hot shit with a private jet." Dead. You're dead. That one has kids in it.

• 3:03:01Joe Rogan?

  That's what God's gonna do. Not terrorists.

• 3:03:04Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, not terrorists. No.

• 3:03:05Joe Rogan?

  Smite the comic with a big ego.

• 3:03:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:03:08Joe Rogan?

  That's funny. The people that take the photos in front of the private jet, they're the ones that are gonna get smitten.

• 3:03:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:03:12Joe Rogan?

  You post it right before you get on the flight.

• 3:03:14Speaker 01

  I worry about that. A hundred percent.

• 3:03:17Joe Rogan?

  Fresh new sneakers.

• 3:03:18Speaker 01

  You're going down, dude.

• 3:03:19Joe Rogan?

  Expensive watch.

• 3:03:20Speaker 01

  I'll look at a plane that I'm on and see if there's kids. I'm like, "Oh, we're safe, we're safe." God's not gonna kill these kids.

• 3:03:24Joe Rogan?

  That's funny.

• 3:03:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, totally.

• 3:03:26Joe Rogan?

  Um, thank you. Thanks for being here.

• 3:03:29Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 3:03:29Joe Rogan?

  It was a lot of fun.

• 3:03:30Speaker 01

  Watch my special.

• 3:03:31Joe Rogan?

  It's available right now on Netflix. What's it called?

• 3:03:33Speaker 01

  Today, it came out today.

• 3:03:34Joe Rogan?

  Today.

• 3:03:35Speaker 01

  Take Me With You.

• 3:03:36Joe Rogan?

  Take Me With You. Alright.

• 3:03:39Speaker 01

  Hell yeah. Thanks for having me.

• 3:03:41Joe Rogan?

  My pleasure, I'll see you tonight. We'll have some fun.

• 3:03:43Speaker 01

  Oh yeah.

• 3:03:43Joe Rogan?

  Alright, bye everybody.

• 3:03:59Joe Rogan?

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