How to Communicate with More Confidence and Master Your Next Conversation! With Jefferson Fisher

Full Video Available on YouTube @JamieKernLimaOfficial. Are You Ready to believe in YOU?🙌 jamiekernlima.com 👈 Sign up for my FREE Inspirational Newsletter here and you’ll ALSO get special prompt questions to help you grow in your self-worth-building that pair with each episode!🩷 Make sure to click the “Follow” button for the show on your favorite podcast app, so you’ll be the first to get each episode! ____ Did you know that how you communicate, how you argue, and how you handle the way others communicate and treat you, can change every single part of your life! Today we have one of the top communication experts in the world, who’s sharing the secrets and Simple tools you can apply right now today, to help you communicate with confidence to improve your life at work, at home and in your most important relationships! Jefferson Fisher is a trial lawyer, 5th generation award-winning attorney, writer, and speaker whose work has gained him millions of followers all over the world, through short, simple, practical social media videos teaching people how to argue less and talk more. Whether it’s handling a heated conversation, dealing with a difficult personality, or standing your ground with confidence, Jefferson helps you communicate during life's everyday arguments and conversations! His brand-new book, The Next Conversation – Argue Less, Talk More is out now! Jefferson says you can change everything about your life by what you say next! And you and I are in for a treat because Jefferson has stepped away from his busy legal practice to fly here and be with YOU and me today! And whether you're joining me today for yourself or because someone that you love shared this episode with you, I want to welcome you to the Jamie Kern Lima Show podcast family. And remember this episode is not just for you and me. Please share it with every single person that you know because it can change their life too. Episode Reflection Questions for YOU: Jamie writes prompt questions each episode to spark revelations in your self-worth journey and help you apply the tools and lessons from each episode into your real life right now. Please make sure you’re signed up for Jamie’s free inspirational newsletter jamiekernlima.com 👈 Get my new book WORTHY plus FREE Bonus gifts including a 95+ page Worthy Workbook and more at WorthyBook.com Jefferson's new book, The Next Conversation – Argue Less, Talk More, is now available at https://www.jeffersonfisher.com/book. For more resources related to today’s episode, click here https://jamiekernlima.com/show/ for the podcast episode page. Chapters: 0:00 Welcome to The Jamie Kern Lima Show 4:15 Leaving A Legacy 7:43 Share Your Blessing 24:15 Power Of A Pause 27:55 Your Breath Communicates 32:05 Argue Smarter 40:40 Make Decisions Easier 43:53 Be A Lighthouse It’s such an honor to share this podcast together with you. And please note: I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Click Here to Subscribe to the YouTube Channel Follow me here: Instagram TikTok Facebook Website — Sign up for my inspirational newsletter for YOU at: jamiekernlima.com — Looking for my books on Amazon? Here they are! WORTHY Believe IT

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  I love a great life-changing episode. I am so excited for this one today. Did you know that how you communicate, how you argue, and how you handle the way others communicate and treat you can change every single part of your life? And today, we have one of the top communication experts in the world who's sharing the secrets and simple tools you can apply to your life right now, today, to help you improve your life at work, at home, and in your most important relationships. Jefferson Fisher is a trial lawyer, a fifth-generation, award-winning attorney, writer, and speaker. His work has gained him millions of followers all over the world through short, simple,

• 0:44Jamie Kern Lima?

  practical social media videos, teaching people how to argue less and talk more. Whether it's handling a heated conversation, dealing with a difficult personality, or standing your ground with confidence, Jefferson helps you communicate during life's everyday arguments and conversations. And his brand-new book, called "The Next Conversation: Argue Less, Talk More," is out now. Jefferson says you can change everything about your life by what you say next. And you and I are in for a treat because Jefferson has stepped away from his busy legal practice. He got on an airplane, he flew here to be with you and me today.

• 1:26Jamie Kern Lima?

  Whether you're listening for yourself or because someone that you love shared this episode with you, I want to welcome you to the Jamie Kern Lima Show Podcast Family. Remember, this episode is not just for you and me. Please share this with every single person you know because it can change their life, too. Before we jump into this episode, I'd be so grateful if you'd take two seconds to click on the Follow or Subscribe button on the app you're listening or watching the podcast on. It'll help you because you're going to be the very first to get the episodes, and it's going to help the show because by you following it, it's more likely to be promoted to others to discover. And if you leave a five-star review, that would be even

• 2:08Jamie Kern Lima?

  more amazing. And just thank you so much. This is our show together, and it truly means so much to me. Jamie Kern Lima is her name. Everybody needs Jamie Kern Lima in their life.

• 2:19Speaker 01

  Jamie Kern Lima.

• 2:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  Jamie, you're so inspiring.

• 2:26Speaker 01

  Jamie Kern Lima.

• 2:30Jamie Kern Lima?

  Jefferson Fisher, welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima Show.

• 2:32Speaker 02

  Thank you so much for having me, Jamie. I'm honored to be here.

• 2:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  I'm so excited you're here.

• 2:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:38Jamie Kern Lima?

  Wow, what has happened with you, with your advice, with your videos? It has become a phenomenon.

• 2:46Speaker 02

  Thank you. You're very sweet. Thank you. Yeah, it's truly been a blessing and right now I'm just holding on.

• 2:51Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah, yeah. Well, I'm excited so much to dive into today. You know, tens of millions of people watch your videos from you in the seat of your car and with an iPhone. Can you just talk about like how this all happened? For the person who maybe already watches you and loves you every day, which by the way, half of the people I know do, or maybe someone's brand new, listening to you and me and discovering who you are for the first time. Give us a little insight on how this all happened and how you now are joined by tens of millions of friends every time you put out your words.

• 3:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, it started never with the idea that this is where it would be. It's just continually been one step after one step, door after another door. I was at a big defense firm, a big law firm, and then I, as a partner, I left because I want to start my own. And when I did that, I thought, well, I ought to do some social media. And that was about three years ago. And I started making videos talking about my law firm. I just, I was a personal injury attorney. This is what I did. And I just felt sour about it going, yeah, I'm just selling myself. And I didn't feel that great. And I just kind of had this moment of, well, what do I really want to? What do I want my kids to see?

• 4:15Speaker 02

  If I'm not here anymore, is that really what I want to post? And so often people post things without thinking of the legacy that they're leaving. And that really hit me hard of like, who do I want my kids to see that I am and that I stood for? And I thought, well, what's one thing that I feel that I know that's my gift that I can share? And it was, oh, I can teach people how to communicate and how to handle argument, how to turn conflict into connection. And so I thought, well, no, I can't do that. I need the right camera. I need the right lighting. I need to, I need to look like a lawyer. And eventually I just got over the excuses and I thought, well, I don't have an office because I just started my firm.

• 4:56Speaker 02

  I said, but I have my, my truck and I have my phone. Let's, let's go. So I made my first few videos and then they just started to take off from there. And I just built a wonderful, wonderful community of people that really care about communication. And I just believe that a better world begins with a better conversation. I really do.

• 5:17Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, tell me if I read this right. Didn't your first videos you posted, maybe these were about the law firm.

• 5:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 5:23Jamie Kern Lima?

  They were legal advice, but didn't the first few videos you posted on Instagram get like zero views?

• 5:27Speaker 02

  They got, oh, nothing. They got zero. I Googled, why do my videos have zero views? And I even, there was one where I hired a good friend to record a video for me TikTok style. Cause that was the big thing at the time, like very fast, quick transitions.

• 5:42Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 5:42Speaker 02

  And I paid him to do it and I posted it. And you know how many people saw it, Jamie?

• 5:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  How many?

• 5:46Speaker 02

  Zero. Nobody, nobody. There are more people that watched me making a video with my kids, which I don't post my kids anymore and my family, than they did for the video that I paid for.

• 6:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 6:00Speaker 02

  And I thought, something's not right. It's just, I'm not, I'm not being myself. I'm not being authentic. And that was just what, that was a path that was open for me to say, no, you need to start sharing what's, what's on your heart.

• 6:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah. Does it feel different in your body when you were posting stuff about legal advice? Obviously you're a fifth generation, award-winning attorney with a busy practice, all the things. But did it feel different in your body when you were posting legal advice versus when you started talking about sort of adding value to other people's lives at home on how to communicate in ways that make their life better?

• 6:34Speaker 02

  Absolutely. It was very, it was really rewarding. It's still, I still get the same feeling. It is, I can't tell you, Jamie, how I opening it is for me, the fact that. I make these videos in my car. Nobody else is around. Nobody's, it's in a parking lot. It's on the side of wherever. I make them in a gas station.

• 6:52Jamie Kern Lima?

  No budget.

• 6:53Speaker 02

  No budget. And I think about them almost immediately before I make them. And then right after I make them, I post them. So probably not wise, but I don't batch anything. So what they're seeing is really my thoughts in real time of what happened in my day. What's going on? But the ability to help somebody in the comp. First, when I started to get some followers. That was very new to me. Originally only had like 800 followers, which by the way, were all friends from school in law school. They didn't. That was more intimidating to post to real friends and people that you knew.

• 7:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 7:25Speaker 02

  You care about their opinion a whole lot more than if it's a whole bunch of strangers. And so slowly, I just got really, really sweet comments of people saying, this is great. I'd love to hear about this and what are your thoughts on that? And it just, when you, when you operate in a, in a spirit of giving, a lot of good things happen.

• 7:43Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you feel like when you hold that phone up? And you're saying you think about it right before? And yet the content you're putting out is resonating with tens of millions of people. And like you said, there's a whole lot of people hiring big teams, producing content, all the things. It doesn't resonate with people. You're putting this phone up, video after video after video. People binge watch your videos, by the way. But do you feel like you have an anointing? Do you feel like your faith or your calling is part of this just clear?

• 8:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  It's a whole other level. When, when people can, I don't want to call it channeling.

• 8:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 8:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  But when people can, can, can connect at this level, it almost looks like they have a talent that's just part of their calling or what they're supposed to do on this earth. How did, do you feel that when you film a video? Like where that comes from and how it comes out of you in a way that impacts so many people?

• 8:46Speaker 02

  Yeah. Jamie, my parents, every night.

• 8:51Speaker 02

  My dad would sit on the edge of my bed, lean over and pray and say, Dear God, give Jefferson wisdom and always be his friend. And that was the prayer for all of my life. And I, in my heart, never will doubt the fact that what I have in communication is a gift. And it is my honor, my blessing to share that gift. And so when I share it, I don't think of millions of followers. I think of one person. And in many ways, that is my ability to be the light in their life that they needed, to just hear how to inject some grace and kindness into their world. And that is, that is my, my gift to share. That's why it's my joy,

• 9:36Speaker 02

  because it's truly my, the gift. It's not something that, you know, people say, oh, you learned it in law school. It's because you're an attorney. No, no, no. You know, law school teaches how to read the law. It doesn't teach you how to read people. And so many things that have happened to me are from a spirit of discernment that you only know when you feel it. And that's the wisdom that is given.

• 10:01Jamie Kern Lima?

  So you, you talk about your dad, and that's beautiful, by the way. Thank you for sharing that.

• 10:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:07Jamie Kern Lima?

  What I love right now is because I'm thinking about, you know, I'm thinking about everyone at home who maybe, you know, has done a particular career or they're doing it, but they're feeling like, okay, I'm really good at this, or I can do this, or I'm earning money for my family by doing this.

• 10:22Speaker 02

  Right.

• 10:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  And also, I feel like I have something inside of me that still needs to be an offering to the world, whether it's a book or putting your art out in the world, or hopping on social media in your car and talking to an iPhone and, and, and sharing your gift of teaching other people how to communicate. But getting to where you're at now, I want to share a part of your story and your new book, which is phenomenal, which I read cover to cover.

• 10:46Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 10:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  The next conversation, argue less, talk more. You talk about, you know, you're, you're a fifth generation attorney. And at one point, I think it was after law school, you're working in a law firm that your father is working in. All of us, at some, you know, piece or part of us, most of us want our parents to be happy. We want our parents to be proud of us, right? You decided to, that you weren't fulfilled.

• 11:16Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 11:16Jamie Kern Lima?

  In this law firm, and, and... And you decide to leave and you you had to tell your dad. Yes. You had to tell your dad and that's hard. And I think it was hard for him. Can you share a little bit about that story? Yes. And then also, and I want to jump out of my chair about this part. I love then where it ended up today. Yes. With you and him. There's so much more coming up in this episode. You are not going to want to miss it. But first I wanted to share this with you. In life, you don't soar to the level of your hopes and dreams. You stay stuck at the level of your self-worth. When you build your self-worth, you change your entire life.

• 11:59Jamie Kern Lima?

  And that's exactly why I wrote my new book, Worthy. How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life for You. If you have some self-doubt to destroy and a destiny to fulfill, Worthy is for you. In Worthy, you'll learn proven tools and simple steps that bring life-changing results. Like how to get unstuck from the things holding you back. Build unshakable self-love. Unlearn the lies that lead to self-doubt and embrace the truths that wake up worthiness. Overcome limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome.

• 12:39Jamie Kern Lima?

  Achieve your hopes and dreams by believing you are worthy of them and so much more. Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be? Imagine a life with zero self-doubt and unshakable self-worth. Get your copy of Worthy, plus some amazing thank you bonus gifts for you at worthybook.com or the link in the show notes below. Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you. It's time to find out with Worthy.

• 13:18Jamie Kern Lima?

  Imagine, what would you do if you fully believed in you? My weekly free inspirational newsletter is packed with tips and tools to help you find out. It's called One on One with Jamie and it's delivered right to your inbox each Tuesday morning. It's a love letter from me to you, from my soul to yours. And I hope it brings you the words and messages you need at just the right moment. Plus, when you're a part of my free inspirational newsletter community, you'll be the first to get behind the scenes content, inspirational messages, and be the first to learn about upcoming events and more.

• 14:01Jamie Kern Lima?

  It's the place to be and I sure hope you'll join me there. So if you're not on the list yet, you can sign up for free at jamiekernlima.com or click the link in the show notes below. And here's to becoming unstoppable together. And now more of this incredible conversation together. You decided to, that you weren't fulfilled.

• 14:27Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  In this law firm and, and, and you decided to leave and you, you had to tell your dad.

• 14:34Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 14:34Jamie Kern Lima?

  You had to tell your dad and that's hard. And I think it was hard for him. Can you share a little bit about that story?

• 14:43Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 14:43Jamie Kern Lima?

  And then also, and I don't want to jump out of my chair about this part. I love then where it ended up today with you and him.

• 14:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:50Jamie Kern Lima?

  But this is for everybody at home right now who's just like, ah, they just want to make everyone around them happy. But at the expense of them.

• 14:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:59Jamie Kern Lima?

  Maybe not being and doing and fulfilling who they feel their call to be.

• 15:05Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 15:06Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 15:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's, that's a good question. It was painful at the beginning. Those are some of the most emotional, difficult conversations. He's been at that firm for over 35 years. I was been there for maybe six and I just knew in my heart of hearts, I just did not, I wasn't fulfilled. I, like I said, I felt like I was running with a parachute. Like I just, something was always holding me back. I wouldn't be able to express how I wanted to express. I couldn't really be creative and um, having the conversation with him of leaving the firm.

• 15:41Speaker 02

  It may not sound like a big deal to some people. It was a really big deal. And he, I mean, almost begged me to stay. I mean, because in some sense, it was me leaving him. And so it wasn't leaving the firm. It was me leaving him. The, you know, the ability to talk about cases every day. I'm walking away from that. The, the, the things that were heart wrenching and just felt like a kick in the gut. That it wasn't I was leaving the firm. I was leaving him. And that was really hard to express. And he just would ask, you know, to help me save it. Let's do something different. Get more involved. And I just would be, I, I've done that. I've tried. This is my path.

• 16:26Speaker 02

  And that was really, really difficult.

• 16:32Speaker 02

  But where it, um, the way things turn out.

• 16:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  How do you react when you're now on, you're doing videos on your cellphone in a truck?

• 16:40Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 16:41Jamie Kern Lima?

  At first was he like, or a car, was he first like, huh?

• 16:44Speaker 02

  No.

• 16:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  How did he react to that?

• 16:46Speaker 02

  He, uh, I mean, both my parents did not really do social media at all at the time. And I didn't really do it either.

• 16:52Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 16:53Speaker 02

  Uh, because at the time Instagram was just take a picture of your latte.

• 16:56Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 16:57Speaker 02

  And swipe, put an X Pro filter on it, call it a day.

• 17:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 17:00Speaker 02

  Um, and when they first saw it, they didn't really understand it. Because at first I was just doing it for the law firm. And he's like, oh, okay, well, you, you do that. But for a while he's been, it's not that he didn't want to talk with me. We have a very close relationship, same with my mom. Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful people. It was that, it was just a sore topic for a while. And when the law firm started doing well and things were starting to roll. And I'll just never forget.

• 17:30Jamie Kern Lima?

  Cause you started your own.

• 17:31Speaker 02

  I started my own.

• 17:32Jamie Kern Lima?

  Own law firm, yeah.

• 17:33Speaker 02

  And all I had, I went from having a, a corner office. Two paralegals, an assistant, a whole team that just by myself at a coffee shop with my laptop next to somebody else who was in college, you know, and I just served coffee shops or borrowed friends' back offices. And when I got my own office and I was starting to do well, and he called me and he said, well, I got a, I got a question for you. I said, what's, what's that dad? He said, you, you still got room for the old man? And I said, what? He said, yeah, I'm, if you, I mean, you can say no if you want, but I, I'd love to, to practice.

• 18:18Speaker 02

  I, son, I don't know how long I'm gonna practice, but for however long I got, I want to do it with you. And I mean, I just boo hooed.

• 18:25Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 18:26Speaker 02

  Of course.

• 18:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  It makes me wanna cry. I haven't met him yet.

• 18:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. You'd love him. And I just, yeah, I couldn't have been any better. It meant the world to me. And we get to talk every day and we get to talk about cases and it's just, it's great. It's wonderful. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

• 18:44Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 18:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  It's amazing. So amazing. I think so many of us are scared to, to, to do that because we don't want to let our parents down or we don't want all of that. And this is like so beautiful, you know? And then he comes back around and joins you.

• 18:57Speaker 02

  Yeah. And he's never been happier. I mean, he's just, he's so happy to practice law. He's, it's, um, it's, it's just awesome. It's, it's, um, what, what you thought wasn't gonna work out, when something turns around and shines even brighter, I just, you can't, can't put that into words.

• 19:14Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah, yeah. You know, you have so many tips, tools, tactical takeaways and that people can apply to every part of their life. And I love when you talk about things that you know as a lawyer, like how do you know when someone is lying?

• 19:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:32Jamie Kern Lima?

  And what do you do when they're lying? And how do you respond? And, you know, how do you handle arguments? How do you handle narcissists? How do you handle? I mean, we're gonna dive so deep. I'm so excited about all this. But I want to ask you, you know,

• 19:50Jamie Kern Lima?

  With what's happening with the offering you're putting out in the world of teaching people how to communicate, I'm curious for you, Jefferson, like, what are some of the traits that you admire most in people who you feel are the best communicators in the world?

• 20:06Speaker 02

  Number one would be warmth. And people that you just, you don't even have to talk to them, you can sit in a room and just feel it.

• 20:15Speaker 02

  And maybe it's their energy, maybe the vibe, maybe it's their spirit, just whatever it is, the frequency that they're putting out into the world calms you. And I find that to be very, it makes you attracted to them because you like that warmth and that comfort, that when you talk to them, you feel just a little bit calmer. And so people who communicate very well are not only good at being clear and direct and assertive, but they're also emotionally intelligent enough to know when to slow down. Because things are so busy, we ramp up, but they know that good communication happens in the smallest of words, the shortest of sentences.

• 21:01Jamie Kern Lima?

  When someone allows their warmth to just be, do you feel like it's easier to listen to them and be around them? Because I think a lot of people, especially women, feel like, oh, I've got it, you know, if I'm, if I show my warmth, I'm weak. And I need to, you know, all the things. And I just think that's kind of powerful and insightful, what you just shared, is that when you think of the best communicators, that there's a warmth.

• 21:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, well, I think you'd agree, you never want to hide your light. And I mean, there's so many opportunities that we have to do that. And it's leaning into it. If people feel like, oh, I'm going to be weak if I'm perceived this way, just if you go by the, how you listen to music, things that are very fast. Affect you, makes your mind race. When somebody's talking really, really quickly and you can hardly understand what they're saying and they're getting ramp up and ramp up, that kind of gets you and your anxiety up. But people who slow down, they show more control. It's not the opposite. They show more control, more confidence.

• 22:06Speaker 02

  When you're adding distance to your communication, you are showing them that you are comfortable exactly where you are. And that also shines onto them, to show that in where you are is okay too.

• 22:20Jamie Kern Lima?

  One thing that you seem so masterful at that I feel like I need to work on more is this idea of pausing and of giving space. And this is going to be a big thing for everyone listening because when we dive into all the different topics that are going to affect our lives in so many different ways when we start applying the tools that you share, there's this consistent theme of pause and of space. And I'll never forget the first time I ever gave even a keynote speech, right? It was like a room of, it was like 10,000 people. All this stuff was, it was for Brendan Burchard event, actually. And it was the, it was the first time outside of at cosmetics. And it was a long story, but he's like, I have an opening and I'm like, I'm in.

• 23:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  And it was this hour spot and it was the most phenomenal hour. But every time people cheered or even stood up and cheered or any of the things, because it was really fun. And I was just like pouring into them. I didn't know how to pause. The second they started clapping, I didn't know, and I just kept talking. And I remember afterwards, he came up to me and he says, first of all, like he said, a million great things, which I'm so grateful for. And then he's like, you need to learn how to pause and let the audience like have their moment. Like they're excited, they're cheering for you, they're into it, they're so excited that you overcame this huge obstacle. And I was like, huh, I didn't know how to let the pause happen.

• 23:48Jamie Kern Lima?

  And what I love is you guys, you give so many examples in your book of ways the pause is so powerful, but just really high level. This is for everyone listening. I want you to think right now as you're hearing me and Jefferson. Talk about this. When you're talking with someone, do you ever just pause? And like, let there be space? And maybe you're looking at them in the eye? Or do you start to feel uncomfortable and want to fill the space with words? Can you talk about the power? The power of the pause? And how, right now, everyone at home? Like, different ways you can use just pausing in your communication? And how it actually, literally, helps change your life?

• 24:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 24:26Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 24:27Speaker 02

  The pausing is the most powerful tool you can use in communication. Because it gives you time to choose things. It gives you time to choose, is this worth my words? Is this worth my attention? It also gives you a chance to calm your own emotions, to regulate your emotions. It gives you time to think. And when you're able to pause in conversation, it allows you to show control. If you were to ask me, Jamie, if you said, Jefferson, how was your day? And I immediately said, good. I mean, my day was fine. It was good. It was good. That tells you one thing. If you asked me again, Jefferson, how was your day? And I said, it was good.

• 25:13Speaker 02

  It was good. Very different connotation. What you're telling, and the first one is, I didn't really listen to your question. The second pause is kind of clarifying of, I listened to you. When somebody even gives you one second, two seconds of a pause after a question, it tells you that they're thinking about it. And it's allowing you to show that you're actually acknowledging, taking it in, before you just spit out a response right away. Because we're such in a world of immediacy, of texting back right away, saying that, having that clap back as soon as you get it out. And where the real power in communication is, is slowing things down. It's the pause. Because it allows the other people, like, just like you said,

• 25:57Speaker 02

  when you're speaking to people and maybe they clap or they cheer, it's allowing them to contribute to the conversation.

• 26:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  I just had a big aha moment, like a big aha moment.

• 26:07Speaker 02

  I'm ready.

• 26:07Jamie Kern Lima?

  At at our core, we all just wanna be seen and understood and and and also feel connection and belonging and so many people feel so lonely right now and often, you know, social media can be great in so many ways, but we're lonelier than ever. And one tip you just gave, I think this is so big and I wanna I wanna say it in the way where it really hit me is is is that example you gave, because we all have this happen every day, right? How are you? You know, we go and grab a coffee and, you know, we might ask the person ringing us up, how are you? Or they might ask us, how are you?

• 26:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:42Jamie Kern Lima?

  And we just default, oh, I'm great. Thanks. How are you? You know, whatever. Boom, boom.

• 26:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  And we don't even know what we're saying. It's just like autopilot. And and and yet we're all lonely and we all want more connection. And we're like, why is my husband and I sitting here scrolling our phone and I don't even know how he is. I told him how I was, but I don't think he care. Like, whatever our scenario is, or, you know, moms at school drop off, or whatever it might be. That example you just gave is so powerful and it's so relatable because, you know, when someone says, how are you?

• 27:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  And and you're like, oh, I'm good. Thanks. There's pretty much no connection happening, right? And when someone says, how are you? And you just pause.

• 27:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  And you're like, you think about it, and then you say your answer. Maybe it's like, I'm good, or whatever it is. That pause instantly tells that other person, I see you.

• 27:35Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 27:35Jamie Kern Lima?

  You matter to me. I'm giving you my energy and consideration because I care to connect with you over the question you asked me.

• 27:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, you got it.

• 27:44Jamie Kern Lima?

  Holy moly.

• 27:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  That is like, instant hack to connection with humans. And we're all, so many of us are just feeling like we're missing that in our lives more and more.

• 27:58Jamie Kern Lima?

  I have heard you use the pause in so many different ways. And this is the first time I'm having this big aha over there. Because right now, every person listening, every person watching us, right now, today, they can watch it, walk into a coffee shop, they can look at the person sitting next to them in the room right now. Right? They can, whatever, next time they're interacting with people, and someone asks them this, or they ask someone else that, add this pause in it.

• 28:24Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 28:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  Because then it almost catches someone off guard too, and they realize you are, you're connecting with them.

• 28:30Speaker 02

  Right.

• 28:30Jamie Kern Lima?

  You're connecting with them.

• 28:31Speaker 02

  Yes, when you're able to ask that question.

• 28:33Jamie Kern Lima?

  I'm gonna do this with my husband tonight.

• 28:35Speaker 02

  You should do it.

• 28:35Jamie Kern Lima?

  I'm doing it tonight. I'm doing it tonight. And I'm gonna do it with my kids, actually. I'm gonna do it with my kids too.

• 28:40Speaker 02

  Well, it's so, um, what, what we fall into is, instead of living in it, we just, we're just pressing the buttons.

• 28:47Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 28:47Speaker 02

  You know, they, barista asks, "How's your day?" "Oh, it's good, I'm fine." "How are you?" "Oh, I'm good, I'm fine." And I just, we're just pressing buttons.

• 28:53Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 28:53Speaker 02

  And we're not, we're not really living in it. And let me tell you, the one trick to making sure that it does work with your kids and with your husband.

• 29:01Jamie Kern Lima?

  We want the trick, we want the trick.

• 29:02Speaker 02

  And this is what I, I, I live by, and I teach this to every one of my clients. And it is this, let your breath be the first word that you say. So where your first word would be of going, "No, I'm good, I'm good", you put a breath in its place. And so when you have the mindset of a breath being the word, I mean, it's, because you're saying something, even in that pause, in that breath, in that silence. It might be the absence of words, it's not the absence of communication. So if you ask me how my day was, and I go,

• 29:41Speaker 02

  "I conveyed something right there, that's a sigh, I'm, I'm sending the message to you without words, it was heavy, it was a load, it was a lot." I mean, and when you have that pause, it's the invitation to connect.

• 29:56Jamie Kern Lima?

  So good.

• 29:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:58Jamie Kern Lima?

  So good. Oh, my gosh. Okay, I'm already excited for the way everyone is gonna share how this impacts their life.

• 30:05Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 30:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  Like, the DMs are gonna come in, comments, the messages, and we're just getting started. But that one tool, that one tool, I'm just thinking about, and the ripple effect of that.

• 30:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 30:19Jamie Kern Lima?

  Cause as a society, we're really close to bankrupt when it comes to like true just connection.

• 30:26Speaker 02

  It really is. And, and the thing with communication of what it makes it so important, um, on top of just the pause and the ability to take a moment and express how you really feel, is that what you say

• 30:42Speaker 02

  for the vast majority of your life is who you are. That's, that's how people will experience you. That's how people will experience Jamie. That's how people will experience Jefferson. It's not by really what you do, though they might see that, that act of kindness. It's what you say. When you say, I like that person, you just met them. You say, I like that person. They were nice. What you really mean is they said nice things. If somebody's rude and you don't like them, yeah, that person's rude. It just means that what you heard is you didn't like. It's not rude to you. So for the vast majority, it is your words is what describes who you are to those people. That's what's gonna describe and, and um, evaluate your legacy. That's the ripple effect.

• 31:26Jamie Kern Lima?

  With your, so, so you being a fifth generation attorney, your wife, Sierra, is an attorney.

• 31:31Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 31:31Jamie Kern Lima?

  And so, uh, I would love for all those people at home who are either in partnerships or friendships where arguing happens.

• 31:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:43Jamie Kern Lima?

  Jefferson Fisher, uh, you and your wife being attorneys, being phenomenal communicators, right? Having sometimes your job depending on it. Um, and then you, of course, becoming now one of the most well-known communicators in the world. Um, tens of millions of people going to you for this. Uh, how do you and your wife argue?

• 32:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:04Jamie Kern Lima?

  And like, let us in on all the secrets that we all need to be doing differently.

• 32:10Speaker 02

  Are you ready for the tea?

• 32:11Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 32:12Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 32:12Jamie Kern Lima?

  There's so much more coming up in this episode. You are not gonna wanna miss it, but first I wanted to share this with you. In life, you don't soar to the level of your hopes and dreams. You stay stuck at the level of your self-worth. When you build your self-worth, you change your entire life. And that's exactly why I wrote my new book, Worthy: How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life for You. If you have some self-doubt to destroy and a destiny to fulfill, Worthy is for you. In Worthy, you'll learn proven tools and simple steps that bring life-changing results, like how to get unstuck

• 32:57Jamie Kern Lima?

  from the things holding you back, build unshakable self-love, unlearn the lies that lead to self-doubt, and embrace the truths that wake up worthiness, overcome limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome, achieve your hopes and dreams by believing you are worthy of them, and so much more. Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be? Imagine a life with zero self-doubt and unshakable self-worth. Get your copy of Worthy, plus some amazing thank you bonus gifts for you at worthybook.com or the link in the show notes below.

• 33:41Jamie Kern Lima?

  Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you. It's time to find out with Worthy. Imagine, what would you do if you fully believed in you? My weekly free inspirational newsletter is packed with tips and tools to help you find out. It's called One-on-One with Jamie, and it's delivered right to your inbox each Tuesday morning. It's a love letter from me to you, from my soul to yours. And I hope it brings you the words and messages you need at just the right moment. Plus, when you're a part of my free inspirational newsletter community,

• 34:26Jamie Kern Lima?

  you'll be the first to get behind the scenes content, inspirational messages, and be the first to learn about upcoming events and more. It's the place to be, and I sure hope you'll join me there. So if you're not on the list yet, you can sign up for free at jamiekernlima.com or click the link in the show notes below. And here's to becoming unstoppable together. And now, more of this incredible conversation together. How do you and your wife argue?

• 34:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:58Jamie Kern Lima?

  And like, let us in on all the secrets that we all need to be doing differently.

• 35:04Speaker 02

  Are you ready for the tea?

• 35:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 35:06Speaker 02

  Okay, my wife, no, I'm kidding.

• 35:09Speaker 02

  She's a fantastic communicator. What law really teaches you to be concise. And what I like to compare it is, I'm a lot slower, she operates a lot faster. But often, we have to communicate at the same level. You have two kids and you're raising a family and everything. It's a lot. Our arguments are very short. And the reason because of that is, we operate on this very quick to apologize, very quick to resolve. If you want your argument to be shorter with your spouse, with your partner, with your friend, be quick to apologize. So often, it is the continual circular arguments that just tend to roll on forever. Because you can't really sleep. When you're having that bad argument with your spouse

• 35:54Speaker 02

  or a significant other, it keeps you up at night. It begins to live and seep. And now, you're having to put on an act for your kids. When really, you're irritated at each other and you want to lash out. Being quick to apologize and quick to resolve, that makes our arguments very short. Because we're fast to say, "That's not what I meant." Or, you know, "I can see how that's how you would take it. I didn't mean it that way. I didn't intend it that way." Whenever you can push out your intentions rather than pushing how they should react, it's a big difference. What I mean by that is, here I am taking the accountability of, "I could have done better communicating that." Versus, "Why would you behave that way?"

• 36:38Speaker 02

  Why would you even behave that way when I said this? Who reacts like that? So when you, when you take the responsibility for being understood, radical things can change.

• 36:48Jamie Kern Lima?

  Even if you think they're completely at fault, they don't get it, they should do different, they should do better. But that's gonna go to, for an argument forever, cuz I've tried that.

• 36:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:58Jamie Kern Lima?

  So you're saying that you're not saying they're right by apologizing, or by, you know, you're saying, oh wait, maybe I could've communicated that differently.

• 37:08Speaker 02

  Right.

• 37:09Jamie Kern Lima?

  You're doing your part to try to make the argument shorter.

• 37:13Speaker 02

  There are times when, and again, I'm not pointing to where people are in toxic relationships. You have people with narcissistic tendencies. Yes, that can be circular and terrible. I'm not saying you should just apologize to apologize.

• 37:25Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 37:26Speaker 02

  What I'm communicating is whenever there is a friction in the conversation.

• 37:32Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 37:33Speaker 02

  We make sure that it doesn't get heated. In other words, it doesn't combust and turn into flame. It is trying to draw it out by unraveling the knot and going, okay, this is how I understood it. What, what did you hear? Okay, that's what, that's not what I intended at all. I'm sorry. What I meant to say was X, Y, and Z. So the quicker you can get to that, the better.

• 37:53Jamie Kern Lima?

  That's so good. Okay, so this is what I intended. What did you hear?

• 37:57Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 37:58Jamie Kern Lima?

  And then, oh, okay, well, that's not what I intended.

• 38:00Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 38:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  Here's this.

• 38:01Speaker 02

  Right.

• 38:02Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, I wanna just share something that I think is so, is so profound. Because every time I was growing up, when I knew my parents were arguing, or this or that, you know, they didn't argue much. My parents actually just didn't talk about hard things.

• 38:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:14Jamie Kern Lima?

  When they did argue. And I knew, I knew that they were. I would go in and, and I would, you know, say, is everything okay? And they're like, absolutely. And, you know, they cover it up.

• 38:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  We think we wanna protect our kids and, and hide it. But if an argument's getting drug out, and we're actually hiding it, you know, I read something where children are learning to not trust their own intuition. Cuz they're saying, is everything okay? We're like, oh, it's fine, it's fine. They know it's not.

• 38:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, they can sense it.

• 38:38Jamie Kern Lima?

  They sense it. And we're saying, don't trust your senses, or your senses are off, or something like that. And so the idea of, you know, the stronger you become at communicating, and learning how to respond in an argument with someone you love in a way that diffuses it,

• 38:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:55Jamie Kern Lima?

  just has so many ripple effects beyond just that particular thing. So I love that.

• 39:01Speaker 02

  I wanna make sure I tell you, right along with that, this happened. Sometime last year with my son, who is now seven. And I got home, long day, suit and tie. And I'm starting to make their lunches for tomorrow. Son asked me, you know, how your day was, Dad? And I said, I was fine, buddy. It was good. It was good. It was a good day. How was your day? And I'm continuing to make the sandwich. And he doesn't bring it up again. We go on about dinner and bedtime, bath, everything. I'm sitting on his bed for prayers and song. And first thing he asked was, why'd you tell me it was a good day when it wasn't? I kid you not, that is exactly what he said.

• 39:46Speaker 02

  I said, what did you mean? He said, you didn't say it like it was good. You said it like you were sad. And I mean, it was such a just slap in the face of, I'm never gonna say it was just good again. I need to, he needs to hear that from me, even when the day's been bad. He needs to hear when it's been tough. I mean, that's, and it was just this moment of how dare I try to just gloss over the fact of that? He needs to know that I have hard days too. And that hit me just like a ton of bricks. So, yeah, no hiding from him. Yeah.

• 40:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  Wow. And you know, you say, I think this is something really, really powerful, because a lot of people don't, they don't want to get into argument. A lot of people don't even want to have a conversation, especially if there's like anything hard or difficult or challenging or, you know, any of it. And you say that when you align your conversations or your arguments with your personal values, that you're sort of aligned then ahead of time with your goals before you go into it. Can you explain to us what that means? And how we all do it right now, today,

• 40:57Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 40:57Jamie Kern Lima?

  in our lives?

• 40:58Speaker 02

  So, values are intrinsic to everybody. What I value is gonna be different than what you value. They might be similar, but we all take it different ways based on how we've been raised. What values do is guide you like a north star when there's, you don't have any kind of compass. What I do, what I encourage is that people have conversational values. Because when you do, decisions become easier. Take it for example with a company, your major Fortune 500 companies. Like your company, there are ones that have values. And when you have a value, decisions become easier because you don't have to question it. You follow the value.

• 41:40Speaker 02

  If my value is, I only work with clients who align with me, comes easy. I don't have to make that decision. I know that that's who I'm going to work with. Same thing in your conversations. So one of my values that I hold dearly is where there is kindness, I will use it. Where there is room for kindness, I will use it. Doesn't matter what they did, doesn't matter what they caused. The question is, is there room for kindness? And that comes from my mama. I'd complain about something that someone happened at school, expecting her to, you know, buy into the tea. Let's get some, you know, how dare they kind of thing. And what my mom would say is, well, were you kind? I can hear it in my head. She'd say, well, were you kind?

• 42:24Speaker 02

  And I would always go, uh, I mean, I'm probably not, mom. And she'd go, well, I think you should be kind. I mean, that was just her thing. And that became my such a value of me of when I'm talking on the phone to an opposing attorney and he says something snide, I know that he's trying to jab me. Is there room for kindness? I'll use it. And I'll say something like, well, you know, I know you really care for your clients. I know you really care for your clients, Matt, and that really shows. Any way that I can just share a little bit of kindness, I don't have to worry about the next zinger. I don't have to worry about what can I say to impress them? Is there room for kindness? And that's what I'll do. But I have others.

• 43:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  Maybe you feel like that works to your advantage.

• 43:07Speaker 02

  Every time.

• 43:08Jamie Kern Lima?

  Even with a snide attorney on the call.

• 43:10Speaker 02

  Yes, because the.

• 43:12Jamie Kern Lima?

  They don't mistake it for weakness.

• 43:13Speaker 02

  Because how they interpret it is going to be how they interpret it. I'm the one that has to be left with it. I'm the one that has to walk away and go home to my family. And if I'm carrying that conversation that I had with that opposing attorney home. Why? It's they they don't deserve that. That's not what that conversation was for. That's not why they said it. And so having these values, another that I I love to use is if I can't be a bridge, be a lighthouse. If things burn down and don't work out with that other people, that's okay. They'll always still know where I'm at. They they always know where to find me. So when you have these ideas in your head of what my value is.

• 43:53Jamie Kern Lima?

  Explain that a little bit more. If I can't be a bridge.

• 43:55Speaker 02

  Be a lighthouse.

• 43:56Jamie Kern Lima?

  Be a lighthouse.

• 43:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, so let's say you and I been friends and we have a big fallout. Despite what I say, and I I'm really trying to mend this relationship. And it's just not happening. They've you've written me off. It's not working out. The bridge is really burned. Well, it's okay. I'm still going to be a lighthouse. Maybe I'll see you in five years. Maybe I'll see you 15 years when life has happened to both of us. But I'm not going to change the light that I'm going to to put out into the world just because of our bridge was burned.

• 44:28Jamie Kern Lima?

  Or the light you wish that other person.

• 44:30Speaker 02

  Yes, yeah, absolutely. And so when you have these values and every one of us has a value and you you that's how you handle your conversations. Because it allows you to, I don't have to worry about decisions. The values make the decisions for me.

• 44:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm, that's so good. I love that too, because I've had to do this. I wish I've never had to do this. I had to do this even recently where a friend just, oh, just like completely wasn't the friend I thought they were. And I think parts of our humanness want to, you know, tell them all the reasons they're wrong or this or that or all the things. And it's like, I think when you can just be a lighthouse and go, okay, so it's a different friendship than I thought. And I'm just gonna pray for them and love on them. And I feel like what happens then is you meet the vibration also of attracting great friends.

• 45:21Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 45:21Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, when you when you.

• 45:23Speaker 02

  And that's your gift.

• 45:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 45:25Speaker 02

  I mean, that's where it comes back. Whenever you send that zinger, that clapback, that sense of, oh, oof, man, I just put together the perfect. Paragraph that's gonna punch them in the mouth.

• 45:35Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 45:35Speaker 02

  It's got, it always has a bad aftertaste.

• 45:38Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 45:38Speaker 02

  Always.

• 45:39Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 45:39Speaker 02

  It may not be right within that moment, it, but it'll probably be the next morning.

• 45:44Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm.

• 45:45Speaker 02

  It'll definitely be a week from now. And I mean, it's, the longer it goes, the harder it is to come back together.

• 45:51Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm. I even think about that when I see comments online. Someone just like,

• 45:55Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 45:55Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, it can feel like a temporary relief or something when you just, you know, get that hateful comment out or attack someone. But then you're meeting the vibration of that in your life. So it just comes all around you in different, in different areas. So that's so beautiful. It'd be the lighthouse.

• 46:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 46:12Jamie Kern Lima?

  Even if you're not,

• 46:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 46:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  even if you're not the bridge.

• 46:15Speaker 02

  That's right.

• 46:15Jamie Kern Lima?

  Even if you're not the bridge. How, um, what role, what role does self-worth play in communication with others and with ourself?

• 46:25Speaker 02

  Self-worth matters of who you're listening to. It's the question of who are you listening to? When it's, uh, say, I have the confidence, or I can be assertive, or I shouldn't have said that. It is the line of who, who are you listening to in your life that's driving your, your own value? So much of what we put in self-value is a lie often. It's doubt. We, we sow a lot of doubt into ourselves and that can grow over time to where when you get that one comment from a troll, all of a sudden you feel like they're telling you the truth.

• 47:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm.

• 47:01Speaker 02

  And really all they're doing is speaking to your doubts. And self-worth is a, something that you can grow into and I don't wanna say lean into, it's something you can step into.

• 47:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm.

• 47:14Speaker 02

  Because when you can learn how to communicate effectively to stand up for yourself, just a little bit, you have that self-worth. When you can tell somebody no and it works, you feel excited about it. You feel worthy. And you feel like, hey, I have that within myself of good, good job. Okay, now you feel a little bit better. And then you continue to grow in that step by step by step. But self-worth is very much tied to your communication. Because again, how you communicate. Is who you are and how you feel about yourself.

• 47:42Jamie Kern Lima?

  And how you communicate with yourself.

• 47:44Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, yes, no doubt, because it's remember, who are you listening to? Am I listening to my own doubts? People who are negative, say negative things. And people who are positive, say positive things. It's as simple as that. When you start to doubt yourself, it's because you're listening to your doubts. You're not listening to the positivity. When you feel anxious, you're listening to the anxiety inducing thoughts of what ifs of what ifs, rather than the comfort in knowing, I knows, I knows, I knows.

• 48:16Jamie Kern Lima?

  These are such powerful tools that we can apply to our life right now.

• 48:19Speaker 02

  Right.

• 48:19Jamie Kern Lima?

  And what I love is they're free. They're free. And they're not always easy, but we can get in the habit of them. And we can apply them right now. So, thank you for these tools. Remember, this episode is not just for you and me. Please share this with every single person you know, because it can change their life too. Make sure to pick up Jefferson's new book, The Next Conversation. Argue Less, Talk More. And check out his brand new Jefferson Fisher School of Communication. We'll link it in the show notes. And if you love today's episode too, well, my only ask is you please click on the follow or subscribe button for the show on the app that you're listening or watching it on, then give it a five star review,

• 49:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  and then share this episode with everyone you believe in. Share it with another person in your life who could benefit from it. Post it and share it with others online or in your community who just might need the words and tools and lessons in this episode today. You never know whose life you're meant to change today by sharing this episode. Just thank you so much for joining me. And before you go, I wanted to share some words with you that couldn't be more true. You, right now, exactly as you are, are enough and fully worthy. You're worthy of your greatest hopes, your wildest dreams, and all the unconditional love in the world. It's an honor to welcome you to each episode of the Jamie Kern Lima Show.

• 49:47Jamie Kern Lima?

  And here, I hope you'll come as you are and heal where you need, blossom what you choose, journey toward your calling, and stay as long as you like because you belong here. You are worthy, you are loved, you are love, and I love you. And I cannot wait to join you on the next episode of the Jamie Kern Lima Show.

• 50:12Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you struggle with negative self-talk? Living with a constant mental narrative that you're not good enough is exhausting. I know because I've spent most of my life in that habit. The words you say to yourself about yourself are so powerful. And when you learn to take control over your self-talk, it's life-changing. And I wanted to give you a free resource that I created for you if this is something that could benefit your life. It's called "Five Ways to Overcome Negative Self-Talk and Build Self-Love." And it's a free how-to guide to overcome that negative self-talk to build confidence and develop unshakable self-love

• 50:56Jamie Kern Lima?

  so that you can dream big and keep going in the pursuit of your goals. Don't let self-sabotaging thoughts hinder your progress any longer. It's time to rewrite the script of your life, one filled with self-love, resilience, and unwavering belief. If you're ready to take charge of your narrative, build unwavering confidence, and empower yourself to persevere on the path to your dreams, you can grab your free guide to Stop Overthinking and Learn to Trust Yourself at JamieKernLima.com/resources or click the link in the show notes below.

• 51:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  Who you spend time around is so important as energy is contagious and so is self-belief. And I'd love to hang out with you even more, especially if you could use an extra dose of inspiration, which is exactly why I've created my free weekly newsletter that's also a love letter to you, delivered straight to your inbox from me. If you haven't signed up to make sure that you get it each week, just go to jamiekernlima.com to make sure you're on the list and you'll get your one-on-one with Jamie weekly newsletter and get ready to believe in you. If you're tired of hearing the bad news every

• 52:17Jamie Kern Lima?

  single day and need some inspiration, some tips, tools, joy and love hitting your inbox, I'm your girl. Subscribe at jamiekernlima.com or in the link in the show notes.

• 52:31Speaker 01

  I am so excited for this book. You know why? Because it's going to save so many people. It's going to save them. Worthy, your new beautiful book, Worthy. Get this book? This book? I'm telling you, it's a book that can change anybody's life who picks it up. Anybody who's ever felt that they were not good enough, didn't measure up, something's missing in your life, I have to tell you. It's powerful. It's happening. It's worthy.

• 53:02Jamie Kern Lima?

  Imagine, what would you do if you fully believed in you? I went from struggling waitress facing non-stop rejection to founder of It Cosmetics, a billion-dollar company, by learning how to overcome self-doubt and believe I'm worthy of my hopes and dreams. And I'm sharing how you can too in my new book, Worthy: How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life. If you're ready to truly trust yourself and break through that barrier of self-doubt and know that where you come from, or even where you are right now, doesn't determine

• 53:42Jamie Kern Lima?

  where you're going, then Worthy is for you. It's time to go from doubting you're enough to knowing you're enough. It's time to step into all of who you are and into the person you were born to be. And it's time to believe that you are worthy of it. Because in life, we don't become what we want. We become what we believe we're worthy of.

• 54:08Jamie Kern Lima?

  Join the Worthy Movement today by grabbing your copy of Worthy anywhere books are sold. And head to worthybook.com now for free gifts, including my five-part course on Becoming Unstoppable and my 95-page Worthy Workbook Action Plan that teaches you how to implement the tools from the book into your real life right now.

• 54:32Speaker 03

  Worthy is groundbreaking.

• 54:33Speaker 04

  Yo. My God. Worthy, you are worthy.

• 54:37Speaker 03

  This book is going to change lives.

• 54:39Speaker 04

  This book literally will teach you how to actually feel worthy so that you can have the strength, you can have the confidence.

• 54:45Speaker 03

  The lessons in this book and the strategies will change your life. You will never be the same again after you read this book.

• 54:51Speaker 05

  Jamie's book, Worthy, is a must-read. It is going to inspire you, empower you, give you the hope that you need and the kick in the rear end that you deserve. Jamie's book, Worthy, is incredible.

• 55:04Jamie Kern Lima?

  The gifts are going away, but they're all free right now on worthybook.com.

• 55:12Jamie Kern Lima?

  It's such an honor to share this podcast together with you. And please note, I'm not a licensed therapist and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.