They F*cking Hate Each Other | Financial Audit

*JOIN FOR FREE* - I am personally paying for your Hammer *ELITE* subscription for the first month ➡️ https://bit.ly/chpostshow Sign up for *ELITE* and I'll send you a digital gift card covering the $10 cost. In today's post-show, they lose their sh*t in the post-show, it's crazyyy... full fighting, calling out, hidden debt... no way this marriage lasts another 6 months Submit proof of purchase at https://hammerelite.com/proofofpurchase for reimbursement. 💸 Download DollarWise today: https://bit.ly/dollarwiseapp 🔥 GamerSupps: tasty, cheap ($0.40/serving)! Save 10% with code CALEB: https://gamersupps.gg/caleb 👉 Checking & Savings: Get up to a $350 bonus with a new Chime® Checking account, and earn up to 3.50% APY on your savings: https://secure.moneymatchup.com/350-bonus ============================= *Sponsors for This Video* ============================= Use Yrefy to refinance your private student loans today at: https://yrefy.com/hammer or call (888) Yrefy-78 ============================= Master Your Money with Caleb Hammer ============================= ⚡️Budget YOUR dream life with my simple courses: ➡️ https://bit.ly/calebhammer ⚡️Check out all of my custom Financial Audit merch: ➡️ https://bit.ly/caleb-merch ============================= *Check Out My Resources* ============================= 👉 Get a $40,000 cash bonus by investing with Webull! https://www.webull.com/k/Caleb 👉 Checking & Savings: Get up to a $350 bonus with a new Chime® Checking account, and earn up to 3.50% APY on your savings: https://secure.moneymatchup.com/350-bonus 👉 Land a high-paying job with no experience or degree: ➡️ https://coursecareers.com/CalebHammer 👉 Get $20 from Acorns for free: ➡️ https://acorns.com/caleb 👉 First 100,000 Fizz sign-ups with code HAMMER10 get $1.0: https://www.joinfizz.com/caleb 👉 Helium Mobile: Use promo code CALEB for a FREE plan ➡️ https://hellohelium.com/ 👉 Protect your online privacy and security for free with Aura: ➡️ https://aura.com/hammer 👉 Get an exclusive HighLevel 30-day trial: https://gohighlevel.com/calebhammer ============================= *Chapters* ============================= 00:00 Intro 11:15 that’s actually really pathetic 22:35 of course they were at Whataburger lol 33:38 even more pathetic wtf 49:38 shoutout fetty wap ig 58:34 what is this dudes problem 01:18:56 theyre playing the blame game ============================= Want more content? ============================= 🍿Caleb Hammer LIVE: / @calebhammerlive 🍿 Financial Audit Follow-Ups here: / @financialauditfollowups ============================= *Connect with me!* ============================= TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@calebhammercomposer X: https://x.com/sircalebhammer IG: https://www.instagram.com/calebhammercomposer/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/calebhammercomposer/ ============================= *Want to be a guest on Financial Audit?* ============================= 👉 We film weekdays in our studio in Austin, Texas (in person only)! To apply, visit: https://calebhammer.com/apply *Some of the links and other products that appear in this video are from companies for which Caleb Hammer will earn an affiliate commission or referral bonus. This is not investment advice. Sponsorship and business inquiries: [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:31Speaker 01

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• 0:59Caleb Hammer?

  To watch episodes of Financial Audit a week earlier, check us out on YouTube.

• 1:02Speaker 03

  Hey, you know how I got this fucking fat, Caleb? Every time I [__] your mom, she makes me a sandwich. So if we want to keep going with the fat jokes, we can go there. I think the bottom line is we wouldn't be in so much trouble if she hadn't taken out a bunch of credit cards.

• 1:14Speaker 04

  Well, at least I have a high school degree.

• 1:16Speaker 03

  If he was married to you, he would smoke nicotine too. She will [__] pick a fight with a brick wall. We were in [__] Whataburger the other day. Some lady came in and bitched about her food. And she's like, shut the [__] up. It's not that big of a deal. And it's like, dude, this is why I had to start [__] carrying a gun in the car, was because you start shit with everybody on the [__] road and then they get out of the car and want to come [__] fight me because of your [__] mouth. You're gonna get us [__] killed. So, yes, I [__] go smoke nicotine because I have to deal with you.

• 1:42Speaker 04

  That sounds like a you problem.

• 1:43Speaker 03

  God damn it, dude.

• 1:44Speaker 04

  That sounds like a you problem, not a me problem.

• 1:46Speaker 03

  Dude, having to put up with all this bullshit is [__] killing me. So yeah, I smoke a little bit of [__] nicotine because if I don't, I'm gonna [__] jump off a building from having to deal with all the bullshit that you [__] start.

• 1:58Speaker 05

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• 2:11Speaker 03

  See description for more details. Hi, I'm Benjamin. I'm 31.

• 2:17Speaker 04

  And I'm Xena. I'm 30. We're based out of Nevada, Texas.

• 2:20Speaker 03

  And this is Financial Audit.

• 2:23Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, it is. Thanks for coming. I have no idea where the that is, but that's okay. I do know it's a small town based on what you told me before we started filming. So very curious to hear what we do for work in Nevada, Texas. What do you do for work in Nevada, Benjamin?

• 2:36Speaker 03

  Uh, so I just recently got a job working for a gun supplier.

• 2:41Caleb Hammer?

  They make guns in Nevada?

• 2:43Speaker 03

  Uh, little, I actually commute out a little bit to Grapevine, which is about an hour away, but.

• 2:48Caleb Hammer?

  Another place that also no one knows. Your hours, your commute's an hour?

• 2:52Speaker 03

  Yeah. So we live basically.

• 2:54Caleb Hammer?

  Why don't you live where industry is?

• 2:55Speaker 03

  Oh, okay. Well, look, dude, like, it's not that fucking easy to find a job in DFW that isn't like horse slop right now. And so like, you really have to dig.

• 3:05Caleb Hammer?

  It's literally one of the best job markets in the entire country, that metro.

• 3:07Speaker 03

  You say that.

• 3:08Caleb Hammer?

  Well, metrics say that.

• 3:09Speaker 03

  Well.

• 3:10Caleb Hammer?

  Employers say that, employees say that, all the data says that. You don't say that.

• 3:16Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, but the, the reality of it is, is that places are always hiring, right? But I submitted over 75 job applications.

• 3:23Caleb Hammer?

  Qualified to anything to save your life. Well, actually, yeah, you're very close to DFW.

• 3:27Speaker 03

  I was gonna say, so.

• 3:28Caleb Hammer?

  What are you talking about? You're just in the middle of the.

• 3:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, but it's like.

• 3:31Caleb Hammer?

  What are you doing?

• 3:31Speaker 03

  Okay, that's fine. So it's like an hour to go through traffic and bullshit. It's not actually a fur.

• 3:36Caleb Hammer?

  You chose to live where you live, so I don't really care. I mean, you're literally, you're closer Dallas than Dallas karting complexes.

• 3:44Speaker 04

  Well, we used to live in Fort Worth.

• 3:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, we used to live in Fort Worth.

• 3:47Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 3:48Speaker 03

  Moved.

• 3:49Speaker 04

  We moved back.

• 3:49Caleb Hammer?

  Very good. So you make guns?

• 3:52Speaker 03

  Uh, sort of. I sell like the accessories to make guns.

• 3:56Caleb Hammer?

  Ooh, exciting. What do you make?

• 3:58Speaker 03

  Uh, air 15 parts.

• 4:00Caleb Hammer?

  No income.

• 4:01Speaker 03

  Oh, uh, like $20 an hour. I just started, like, literally, my first day's Monday.

• 4:05Caleb Hammer?

  Well, that's okay. Well, I don't know why that equals just, just $20 an hour. Like, you can start a job making good money.

• 4:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, I guess. I just started off at 20. My job that I was laid off from, I was making about 23. So.

• 4:18Caleb Hammer?

  What was that job?

• 4:18Speaker 03

  Um, I worked security for an amusement park that I'm not allowed to say.

• 4:24Caleb Hammer?

  What kid did you touch?

• 4:25Speaker 03

  Uh, no, not kids. Uh, this is an adult theme park. For adults.

• 4:30Caleb Hammer?

  Adult, what, there's titties?

• 4:32Speaker 03

  Uh, sometimes, sometimes, yeah, sometimes there's titties.

• 4:35Caleb Hammer?

  Are the rides like going up your ass? Is like oral play?

• 4:40Speaker 03

  It's like the closest thing to doing acid without actually doing acid. It's like psychedelic art experience. So people would come in.

• 4:46Caleb Hammer?

  What are we talking about? Why'd you get laid off?

• 4:48Speaker 03

  Uh, because the company is shit, to be a hundred percent honest.

• 4:51Caleb Hammer?

  That's what everyone says who gets laid off.

• 4:53Speaker 03

  Okay, so they started as an artist.

• 4:54Caleb Hammer?

  The disgruntled former employee, here he is, ladies and gentlemen.

• 4:57Speaker 03

  Listen.

• 4:58Caleb Hammer?

  Every time.

• 4:58Speaker 03

  They got bought out by fucking Disney. And when they got bought out by Disney.

• 5:01Caleb Hammer?

  Disney bought a titty park.

• 5:03Speaker 03

  Well, it's not, I can't, I legitimately like can't say exactly what it is, but they have investments and because like I signed an NDA.

• 5:11Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, yeah, which is good.

• 5:12Speaker 03

  Essentially, I can like come up to the line and tell you. So when they bought it.

• 5:16Caleb Hammer?

  I want you to respect the NDA. I sue the f*** out of people that break NDA, so I hope Disney does too. We all should.

• 5:23Speaker 03

  I, I mean.

• 5:24Caleb Hammer?

  They're there for a reason. I, I don't, like, I don't want to hear the, oh, I signed an NDA. You chose to sign.

• 5:29Speaker 03

  Well, right, I had to, pretty much, but anyway.

• 5:31Caleb Hammer?

  Well, to get a severance, maybe.

• 5:32Speaker 03

  They, yes, so.

• 5:33Caleb Hammer?

  Well, there you go. So you chose that. It was an agreed agreement between two people. I don't want to hear it.

• 5:37Speaker 03

  Right, but anyway, the end of the, end of the thing was is they, when they bought us out, they laid off 400 employees from all of the exhibits. And a majority of those took, a majority of those that took a hit were security professionals because they're switching to an AI platform. Yeah.

• 5:52Caleb Hammer?

  Security for stopping people?

• 5:54Speaker 03

  Yes, so they have like, so they have like three, so they have like three actual security guards, but then everything else is done through, you know.

• 6:01Caleb Hammer?

  Don't, but.

• 6:03Speaker 03

  Camera work, so it's.

• 6:04Caleb Hammer?

  It probably makes sense to an extent. I mean.

• 6:07Speaker 03

  I mean, I just.

• 6:08Caleb Hammer?

  As long as like the camera's catching things, the security can respond in person and you would need less security. Kind of makes sense. I mean, I don't, I don't root for layoffs. It's not very fun. It's not great. It affects people. You weren't making that much more.

• 6:21Speaker 03

  No.

• 6:21Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, no offense, that's not like the career trajectory of a big bread winning opportunity.

• 6:27Speaker 03

  No, and that's why I also was.

• 6:29Caleb Hammer?

  But now you're making less, what are you, what's, do you have a degree?

• 6:33Speaker 03

  Oh, no, no, absolutely.

• 6:35Caleb Hammer?

  Why that reaction?

• 6:36Speaker 03

  I think college is a waste of.

• 6:38Caleb Hammer?

  Sure, you're making twenty dollars an hour or thirty one.

• 6:41Speaker 03

  Right, but, you know.

• 6:43Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, I agree, college can be done very incorrectly.

• 6:48Speaker 03

  I just wasn't.

• 6:48Caleb Hammer?

  But I don't think you're the example of the person to say that. Twenty's not necessarily bad, but in DFW, it's not great.

• 6:55Speaker 03

  Well, in DFW, it's not great, and the only reason I took the pay cut to take this job is because it has a really like.

• 7:00Caleb Hammer?

  Well, you didn't take the pay cut to take the job, you got laid off for your last job.

• 7:03Speaker 03

  Right, but either way, I mean, I think the bottom line is, I know that this company has a good culture and it has an opportunity for growth. So that's why I'm cool with going there.

• 7:14Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure. So what's gonna hit, oh, she's, she was rolling her eyes. I didn't see it, but they caught it. What did you roll your eyes at, lady? Yeah, I haven't talked to you yet, Xena.

• 7:23Speaker 04

  Oh, it's just like, he was, he doesn't have like, no degree. I like tried to push him to go to school and like get something, but he can never figure out what the hell he wants to do.

• 7:32Caleb Hammer?

  Well, see, that's the thing that matters. Cause going to college without knowing what you want to do, sure, you could do like two years at a community college, that's fine. But getting a certification, if you don't know what you want, I, I can get you a course grade certification. You look, you look like you were born into IT. I can get you an IT certification through course grades. A lot of them out there have done and made a lot of money. So, I mean, I, I'll get there for you, but, yeah, I mean, college, still. College degrees, on average, do earn double the lifetime value. Those with college degrees. Now, people bullshit college. They go to college, spend way too much, get, they fuck around, they forty percent drop out. And the median that goes to college gets forty thousand dollars in student loans, and again, forty percent of those drop out. And people get bullshit degrees and there's stupid ways to go to college and expensive colleges that you don't need to go to.

• 8:17Caleb Hammer?

  And you think you're doing it for connections and it doesn't really work out. Don't get me wrong, I'll talk the anti-college game. But if we're being objective about it, no, not college in general is just bullshit. Like, that's not how that works. College can be very good if you do it properly. I mean, look at you right now, you can't find a job and you just settled for twenty dollars an hour in DFW.

• 8:37Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I mean. I mean, I'm pretty sure like McDonald's worker, at least in Austin, McDonald's starts at sixteen, seventeen an hour, else they can't hire people. So you're not. Yeah. Like, doing incredibly well at thirty-one. So to just shit on college, you're not the example and shining light to do that.

• 8:54Speaker 04

  I think he just kind of took a job, whatever like came to him because he's been unemployed.

• 8:59Caleb Hammer?

  Cause all the. How long have you been unemployed?

• 9:01Speaker 04

  Well, he's been out of work since April.

• 9:03Caleb Hammer?

  Well, Colton's saying that she's kind of upset with you because she's been carrying your dead weight. Yeah. Through the unemployment.

• 9:09Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 9:09Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. Uh, I think that's the issue.

• 9:13Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 9:13Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. Well, Zena, tell me about it.

• 9:16Speaker 04

  Well, I've been the breadwinner since we got together.

• 9:18Caleb Hammer?

  Well, we know you like bread, that's for sure.

• 9:19Speaker 04

  Yeah, I do.

• 9:21Caleb Hammer?

  What was the point of that? There was no need for me to say that. Why did I even, why did I immediately go for the fat joke?

• 9:29Speaker 04

  I mean, you look like you like bread too, so.

• 9:31Caleb Hammer?

  Girl, you could eat ten of me before we get to.

• 9:34Speaker 04

  You know what? I could. I really like Texas Roadhouse rolls.

• 9:37Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, yeah, who doesn't? No, we'll goon to that.

• 9:40Speaker 04

  I literally will.

• 9:41Caleb Hammer?

  I mean.

• 9:42Speaker 04

  I will goon to that.

• 9:43Caleb Hammer?

  God damn it. Go. Zena and I, Zena and I are gonna go have a party at Texas Roadhouse and you're not invited, bitch. Well, I mean.

• 9:51Speaker 04

  You, get out of here.

• 9:53Speaker 06

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• 10:22Speaker 04

  We're going to go.

• 10:23Caleb Hammer?

  Hey, the fatties are talking. Go lay down.

• 10:26Speaker 03

  Don't you have a dragon to chase or something? You and Samwise gambled with the rest of the other hobbits? You know? I'm just wondering.

• 10:34Caleb Hammer?

  Is that a hairy foot joke?

• 10:36Speaker 03

  No, it's because you're short.

• 10:38Caleb Hammer?

  Well, how tall are you?

• 10:39Speaker 03

  Six, four.

• 10:40Caleb Hammer?

  I guess I am shorter than you. I am the median average height for an American male, but.

• 10:45Speaker 03

  So you're cool with being average?

• 10:47Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. Well, in terms of height, sure.

• 10:50Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 10:51Caleb Hammer?

  I'm cool with that. We don't need a dick measuring contest. You're basically dying in poverty and can't make more than $20 an hour.

• 10:57Speaker 03

  That's fair. Oh, it's like those memes, the lion doesn't concern it.

• 11:00Caleb Hammer?

  And you're only one year older than me. Trust me, I'm not worried.

• 11:04Speaker 03

  You know, I mean, you gotta look up when you talk to me, so I may be balding, but that's okay too.

• 11:08Caleb Hammer?

  Sitting, but it does help. It does help when we stand that I can't see the top of your head is receding.

• 11:14Speaker 03

  See, exactly. That's, that's part of it, right?

• 11:16Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you know, it's your only defenses.

• 11:18Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 11:18Speaker 03

  Like, look, dude, I think the bottom line is we wouldn't be in so much trouble if she hadn't taken out a bunch of credit cards.

• 11:24Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, that's now that's a deflection.

• 11:25Speaker 04

  Yeah. Well, you know, I wouldn't have to take out so many credit cards if you actually like worked.

• 11:29Speaker 03

  I mean, I did work.

• 11:30Speaker 04

  No, you didn't.

• 11:32Caleb Hammer?

  You could have got a job.

• 11:33Speaker 04

  You would have done something like part time.

• 11:35Speaker 03

  I mean, I could. I mean, I guess, but at the same time, you know.

• 11:39Caleb Hammer?

  He throws it on, he throws it on you.

• 11:41Speaker 04

  He throws everything on me.

• 11:42Caleb Hammer?

  Of course.

• 11:43Speaker 04

  I, it's always my fault for everything.

• 11:45Caleb Hammer?

  So Zena, what the is actually going on? He's throwing that you're taking out all the credit cards. Please tell me what's going on.

• 11:50Speaker 04

  Well, we were like, I, I don't make as much money as like I would like to. So like we were surviving. We lived in an apartment together, you know, we were paying like $1,800 a month. And so like my income only covered like a good portion of our bills. So we were struggling. So I just take all these credit cards to help pay for things like gas, groceries.

• 12:14Caleb Hammer?

  Which, which, okay, we'll see because I have a good feeling a lot of it went to bullshit, but. Cause that always continues, you know, that always continues even after laid off in our culture and our, in our incredibly consumerism culture. But the thing is, why the weren't you going out and working and bringing home some bread? Why weren't you? Because listen, let's just take her word for a second. And you guys only lived off the minimum necessities and you had to put it on credit cards that opened them maximum out just because you were just, what was he doing all day?

• 12:44Speaker 04

  Nothing, literally nothing.

• 12:46Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, he had to do something.

• 12:47Speaker 04

  No, he would stay up all night during the day.

• 12:50Caleb Hammer?

  Doing what?

• 12:51Speaker 04

  Gaming.

• 12:52Caleb Hammer?

  There we go. So he's doing something. So he's being a fu- he's being a little incel.

• 12:56Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm, a little gooner.

• 12:57Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, well, no, let's not give that glory.

• 13:00Speaker 03

  That word.

• 13:01Caleb Hammer?

  Doesn't matter. It's not applicable to you. You're not fun like the rest of us. You're a degenerate.

• 13:05Speaker 03

  I am a degenerate.

• 13:06Caleb Hammer?

  Who stays up all night and plays video games instead of actually trying to provide for the household that he lives in. You don't get the title of gooner. You're a loser.

• 13:14Speaker 03

  So, uh,

• 13:17Speaker 03

  I think that we should probably also mention that I had to be on, put on FMLA leave because I had Crohn's disease.

• 13:24Caleb Hammer?

  For quite.

• 13:25Speaker 03

  So I, uh, basically started having some health issues.

• 13:29Caleb Hammer?

  Doesn't matter. You got laid off and you didn't go get another job, though.

• 13:32Speaker 03

  Well, this is actually.

• 13:32Caleb Hammer?

  I mean, that's what I'm talking about. Exactly. And we're talking about what recently happened.

• 13:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:36Caleb Hammer?

  When she had to put everything on credit cards.

• 13:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:38Caleb Hammer?

  Cause FMLA leave, you still get.

• 13:40Speaker 03

  But that's what.

• 13:40Caleb Hammer?

  Still some money.

• 13:41Speaker 04

  No, he didn't.

• 13:42Caleb Hammer?

  You didn't get anything.

• 13:43Speaker 04

  No.

• 13:43Speaker 03

  No, you don't.

• 13:44Speaker 04

  Even when he got laid off, he didn't apply.

• 13:46Caleb Hammer?

  Offer anything?

• 13:46Speaker 04

  No.

• 13:47Speaker 03

  So like, essentially what happened was, the reason that she had to take out the credit cards, in her defense, and this is the one time that I will defend her, is because I.

• 13:54Caleb Hammer?

  The one time, you hear that?

• 13:55Speaker 04

  I know. He literally will never defend me.

• 13:57Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, like, so I got Crohn's disease. I got diagnosed with Crohn's disease. It put me out of work. I had to be hospitalized for a period of time.

• 14:04Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, how was it today?

• 14:05Speaker 03

  Uh, not great, but I just.

• 14:08Caleb Hammer?

  Can you work?

• 14:09Speaker 03

  Now, yes. I've.

• 14:10Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, if you can work, then work and we're not chroming it up.

• 14:13Speaker 03

  No, we're not. And I mean, like, it, that doesn't matter. An excuse is an excuse, but the bottom line was.

• 14:18Caleb Hammer?

  It happened. It's sorry and I can have sympathy for it. I agree, but that's not where we are today. And again, that didn't affect the layoff and what you're doing during the layoff. You were gaming all night.

• 14:26Speaker 03

  Well, I think what ended up happening was, is the reason I got laid off is because I got put on FMLA leave, which of course is illegal, but I can't, you know, fight that. But when I came back from my leave, essentially they're like, oh, hey, like, we don't have a position for you anymore.

• 14:39Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I mean, they laid off a shit ton of people.

• 14:41Speaker 04

  Yeah, cause you were gone for four months.

• 14:43Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but I mean. Four months?

• 14:44Speaker 04

  Four months.

• 14:44Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. Is that what I qualified for?

• 14:46Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, that's what they, that's what it qualified for. I stayed up and played video games and shit all night.

• 14:53Caleb Hammer?

  And how long were you off? Cause it's 12 weeks unpaid that you're able to take off.

• 14:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, so I was off.

• 14:56Caleb Hammer?

  It's a bummer they didn't offer anything outside of that.

• 14:58Speaker 03

  No, they didn't offer anything outside of that, but essentially I was off from like April to September. So pretty, or August.

• 15:05Caleb Hammer?

  So you did more than the 12 weeks?

• 15:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, they gave me a little bit of an extension. Well, because it was considered a debilitating illness and it's still technically, like, I could take disability for it, but I think that like that's garbage, cause I can still stand up and like go to work and do shit. And so to take disability from somebody that actually fucking needs it.

• 15:21Caleb Hammer?

  But then why didn't you?

• 15:23Speaker 03

  Because.

• 15:24Speaker 04

  Cause he didn't apply for it.

• 15:25Speaker 03

  I didn't apply for it.

• 15:26Caleb Hammer?

  Well, there you go. So why the fuck you putting it all on her?

• 15:30Speaker 03

  Like, obviously she has like the experience to go out and get better jobs than I do.

• 15:34Caleb Hammer?

  Is he just a loser? What the fuck is this?

• 15:37Speaker 04

  Sometimes.

• 15:38Speaker 03

  I mean, yeah.

• 15:38Caleb Hammer?

  And what do you do, Xena, for living with all your degrees?

• 15:41Speaker 04

  Um, I am a scheduler for two oral surgeon practices.

• 15:46Caleb Hammer?

  With all her degrees, we're a scheduler?

• 15:48Speaker 04

  I don't have that many degrees.

• 15:49Speaker 03

  He made it sound like you're a collector of degrees. What are you talking about?

• 15:52Speaker 04

  I have a certification.

• 15:54Speaker 03

  Hell, no. You've got like, fuck, dude, you went to school like three different fucking times.

• 15:58Speaker 04

  I went to school twice, first of all. I went to school.

• 16:01Speaker 03

  One was a beauty degree, so we'll just like throw that one out, cause that was a fucking waste. You didn't even go get licensed afterwards, so don't start that shit with me.

• 16:07Speaker 04

  Well, at least I went to school.

• 16:08Speaker 03

  I mean, oh, okay, yeah.

• 16:09Speaker 04

  At least I waited at high school.

• 16:11Speaker 03

  You don't even fucking use. What the fuck are you talking about?

• 16:13Speaker 04

  I use, I went to school to be a medical assistant. I did it.

• 16:17Speaker 03

  You did it?

• 16:17Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 16:17Speaker 03

  And now you're a fucking scheduler and you're at least in here talking shit about me not having a degree?

• 16:21Speaker 04

  And I make more money than you.

• 16:23Speaker 03

  We've established that it's not that hard to make more fucking money than me. Congratulations.

• 16:26Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, at least I have a high school degree.

• 16:29Speaker 03

  Oh, a high school degree? Okay, so because I have a fucking GED that makes it.

• 16:33Speaker 04

  You don't have a GED either.

• 16:34Speaker 03

  All right, motherfucker, stop airing shit out on the podcast, goddamn.

• 16:38Caleb Hammer?

  Why would you say you have a GED if you don't?

• 16:40Speaker 03

  Because I gotta apply for jobs and shit. I use ChatGPT to make that shit, like.

• 16:44Caleb Hammer?

  To make what shit?

• 16:45Speaker 03

  A fake diploma, all the time.

• 16:50Caleb Hammer?

  First of all, first of all, first of all.

• 16:52Speaker 03

  The fact that it works is like.

• 16:53Caleb Hammer?

  It's not even that, but no one asked to see a high school diploma.

• 16:56Speaker 03

  Dude, you would be surprised. I've been asked like four different times applying for jobs recently. I had somebody like actually go through and like verify my employment at other places.

• 17:05Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, I mean, that can happen in those automated systems that can run it. But oftentimes you can put degrees of a lot of things on resumes.

• 17:11Speaker 03

  And yeah, well, see, and that's the thing is I like, I don't lie about other degrees. But yeah, like I've dropped out of high school.

• 17:17Caleb Hammer?

  Why not just get your GED?

• 17:19Speaker 04

  Cause he's lazy.

• 17:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 17:20Caleb Hammer?

  So you've been a loser, a lazy loser your entire life. Why'd you drop out of high school? Lazy loser.

• 17:25Speaker 03

  So I dropped out because we'll get into family stuff later, but my dad doesn't really like, never really believes in school. He was a bar owner. He's.

• 17:31Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, but it's you, not him.

• 17:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, but when I was still living with him, he was like, you don't need to go to school. You need to drop out and come help me with the business.

• 17:39Caleb Hammer?

  Is wrong with him?

• 17:41Speaker 04

  He's Arab.

• 17:42Speaker 03

  He's Arab and like had a very, so like, yeah.

• 17:44Caleb Hammer?

  You're an Arab.

• 17:46Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 17:48Speaker 04

  Mm hmm.

• 17:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 17:52Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, yeah, your last name's Scary.

• 17:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. See, so like.

• 17:56Caleb Hammer?

  Woo, I didn't see that.

• 17:58Speaker 03

  So like, you know, hey, listen, you know.

• 18:01Speaker 04

  They're the white Arabs. They're Lebanese.

• 18:03Speaker 03

  Yeah. All right. Look, just because my uncle, you know, he's a suicide bomber instructor. Not even kidding. He FaceTimed me into his recent class. He said, all right, kids, I'm only going to show you this once.

• 18:13Speaker 03

  No.

• 18:18Caleb Hammer?

  Okay. So your dad's weird.

• 18:20Speaker 03

  Dad is very weird. Dad is very controlling. I've actually gone like no contact.

• 18:25Caleb Hammer?

  A GED is very simple to get if I'm not mistaken.

• 18:30Speaker 03

  I mean, I think now.

• 18:31Caleb Hammer?

  Why not just do it?

• 18:33Speaker 03

  I would have to study and like just do it. I just.

• 18:35Caleb Hammer?

  Study is not the. Dude, the most people I've ever met can go get GEDs.

• 18:40Speaker 03

  Have you ever fucked, have you ever fucked with algebra like out of high school, like as an adult?

• 18:44Caleb Hammer?

  But again, the most people I've ever met have gotten GEDs.

• 18:47Speaker 03

  I mean, like I could do it. I just haven't. I haven't seen a purpose.

• 18:52Caleb Hammer?

  It's, it's making you, well, what purpose? You make $20 an hour in DFW. Again, $20 an hour in the middle of Kansas. Sure. DFW, that's difficult because I'm guessing you're going to be bringing in 2,800 a month after taxes and everything.

• 19:03Speaker 03

  Probably.

• 19:03Caleb Hammer?

  Guessing that's where you're, what do you make being a scheduler?

• 19:06Speaker 04

  24, 14.

• 19:10Caleb Hammer?

  At least you guys live in a, listen, on the edge of DFW for sure, but it is the middle of nowhere. It must be cheap.

• 19:15Speaker 04

  It is.

• 19:16Caleb Hammer?

  It must be cheap. What hits your account per paycheck? And what's that paycheck cycle?

• 19:19Speaker 04

  My bi-weekly and it's about sixteen hundred.

• 19:23Caleb Hammer?

  And you make how much?

• 19:25Speaker 04

  Twenty-four.

• 19:25Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, sixteen hundred, yeah.

• 19:26Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 19:27Caleb Hammer?

  Per paycheck cycle, okay. So thirty-two for you. Yeah, that makes sense. What made him actually go get this job?

• 19:34Speaker 04

  I forced him to get a job.

• 19:35Caleb Hammer?

  Is that the environment we want to potentially ever bring a kid into? Is this is, this is the, why'd you settle for this?

• 19:46Speaker 04

  I mean, I love him, but it's kind of like, yeah, our relationship has been like a...

• 19:52Speaker 03

  It's been rocky.

• 19:53Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 19:53Speaker 03

  I mean, like, you know, I like, I'm fully aware that I have had, like, I've been a piece of shit. And so like, coming on the show and like, kind of moving forward from that is me like, trying to correct the, I like, it's no excuse.

• 20:10Caleb Hammer?

  How did the dynamics work in this house when it comes to finances? Because again, you just started a job. You actually haven't even started the job.

• 20:16Speaker 03

  I actually don't know.

• 20:17Caleb Hammer?

  So what has been happening when it comes to finances in this household, your guys' conversations, what is it like?

• 20:21Speaker 03

  She runs everything.

• 20:22Speaker 04

  There's no conversations because he has no idea what our finances are.

• 20:25Caleb Hammer?

  Why? Dude, you lazy and everything. What's one thing you've done? I don't know.

• 20:29Speaker 03

  I mean...

• 20:30Caleb Hammer?

  He had the top of a leaderboard in Call of Duty, probably, but other than that, what else?

• 20:33Speaker 03

  I fixed my car and I...

• 20:35Speaker 04

  That I had to spend five thousand dollars on.

• 20:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, that car.

• 20:38Speaker 04

  Because you got a shitty ass car.

• 20:40Caleb Hammer?

  Are you able to do anything? Is he able to do anything? Why, why do you put up with a loser?

• 20:44Speaker 04

  He's able to game. That's like what he does.

• 20:46Speaker 03

  All right.

• 20:47Speaker 04

  Plays his little, what is it, the R O G I line thing?

• 20:50Speaker 03

  Yes, I don't think we need to slander specific companies, but yes.

• 20:55Caleb Hammer?

  Slandering you? I think we can all play games without being...

• 21:01Caleb Hammer?

  Losers.

• 21:02Speaker 03

  To be honest with you, I like, am really terrible with numbers. I'm really terrible at everything, apparently.

• 21:07Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, shut the f*** up. Learn something, asshole.

• 21:11Speaker 03

  I mean, yeah.

• 21:12Caleb Hammer?

  I'm not good with numbers either, but I can do personal finances. It's not complicated.

• 21:16Speaker 03

  I mean, I just like, I don't know. She's just always kind of can handle it. So I just let her handle it.

• 21:20Caleb Hammer?

  Why? Why are you just letting him be a piece of shit?

• 21:22Speaker 04

  I tried and it doesn't work.

• 21:24Caleb Hammer?

  Then tell me, tell me about the try and how this works.

• 21:26Speaker 03

  I mean, like, I didn't even activate my debit card.

• 21:29Speaker 04

  Well, okay, so we switched.

• 21:30Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, you're a f***ing. What are you?

• 21:31Speaker 04

  And I ordered him a debit card and we got it in. And for like four months, he wouldn't activate it. And for four months, he didn't even have the bank.

• 21:41Speaker 03

  Well, because my whole, my whole thing behind it was if I don't have a f***ing job, I don't need a debit card, so I don't spend f***ing money.

• 21:46Caleb Hammer?

  But you still do, probably.

• 21:47Speaker 03

  No, I actually.

• 21:49Speaker 04

  You do. Hold on, you do. No, don't even f***ing lie. How many times do you go to Dutch Bros?

• 21:53Speaker 03

  All right, when I was employed, I used to go to Dutch Bros every day.

• 21:55Speaker 04

  No, even when you're not employed, you went to Dutch Bros.

• 21:57Caleb Hammer?

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• 22:42Caleb Hammer?

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• 23:10Caleb Hammer?

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• 23:49Speaker 03

  I think, how many times I've been.

• 23:50Speaker 04

  And your little vape shop.

• 23:54Speaker 03

  Listen, if I, if I, if he was married to you, he would smoke nicotine too. Tell you that right now.

• 23:59Speaker 04

  I don't care.

• 24:00Speaker 03

  Cause god damn.

• 24:01Speaker 04

  What does that mean? What's, what's does that mean?

• 24:03Speaker 03

  Dude, like, let me tell you, she will pick a fight with a brick wall. We were in water burger the other day. Some lady came in and bitched about her food and she's like, shut the up, it's not that big of a deal. And it's like, dude.

• 24:16Speaker 04

  She was Karen.

• 24:17Speaker 03

  It doesn't matter.

• 24:18Speaker 04

  She was yelling, she was yelling at a service worker.

• 24:20Speaker 03

  Right, but that's her prerogative. She wants to yell at that. Don't get involved, this is why I had to fucking carrying a gun in the car, was because you start shit with everybody on the fucking road. And then they get out of the car and want to come fucking fight me because of your fucking mouth.

• 24:34Speaker 04

  Well, it's because you want to pick a fight with people.

• 24:36Speaker 03

  I don't, what are you talking about? You called somebody ugly in the Walmart parking lot yesterday for cutting you off. You seriously hurt that dude's feelings too. I'm not even, no, it's not fucking funny.

• 24:45Speaker 04

  He was.

• 24:45Speaker 03

  Why are you laughing about it? Dude, you seriously like ruined that guy's fucking day because he took a parking spot. And then, are we even gonna go as far as like the fucking Reno's incident? When we went out and you fucking yelled at that whole group of girls for just having a good time?

• 25:00Speaker 04

  Wait. Tell me about it. I don't even remember.

• 25:03Speaker 03

  If I didn't have to fucking, like, no, you talk shit perpetually.

• 25:08Speaker 04

  I do.

• 25:08Speaker 03

  To everybody, and that's a fucking problem. So yeah, I smoke a little bit of-

• 25:11Speaker 04

  It's not a problem.

• 25:12Speaker 03

  What do you mean it's not a fucking problem, dude? I have guys coming out of their car with a fucking tire iron.

• 25:16Speaker 04

  That's because it's your fault, not mine.

• 25:18Speaker 03

  It's my fault. I'm not the one that rolls down my fucking window, "Shut up, ugly, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." Like, dude, you're gonna get us fucking killed.

• 25:24Speaker 04

  Well, if they deserve it, they deserve it.

• 25:26Speaker 03

  Yes, so, yes, I fucking go smoke nicotine because I have to deal with you. Yes, you are a fucking problem. You are not for public consumption.

• 25:33Speaker 04

  That sounds like a you problem.

• 25:34Speaker 03

  God damn it, dude.

• 25:35Speaker 04

  That sounds like a you problem, not a me problem.

• 25:38Speaker 03

  Maybe a fucking loser, but god damn, if I didn't fucking, dude, having to put up with all this bullshit is fucking killing me. So yeah, I smoke a little bit of fucking nicotine because if I don't, I'm gonna fucking jump off a building from having to deal with all the bullshit that you fucking start. So don't even with me.

• 25:53Speaker 04

  Are you done?

• 25:54Speaker 03

  Everything else, yeah, fine. Alright, fine.

• 25:56Speaker 04

  Put the fuck down, bro.

• 25:57Speaker 03

  Fuck you. Seriously, Jesus Christ.

• 26:00Speaker 04

  You're stupid.

• 26:03Caleb Hammer?

  Your rebuttal?

• 26:06Speaker 04

  I mean, I'm a bitch-

• 26:07Caleb Hammer?

  That does paint a picture, I'll be honest.

• 26:09Speaker 04

  I'm a bitch and I've never claimed not to be a bitch. And I've told you when we first started dating that I was a actual bitch. But I call people out, like, I don't give a fuck.

• 26:18Speaker 03

  There's a difference in between, like, fucking calling somebody out and then, like, straight up being like, "Hey, I know my husband's got hands, so I'm gonna talk shit to you because I know that there's nothing you can fucking do about it." You know what I mean? Like, seriously-

• 26:32Speaker 04

  You know, like, I don't care. Like, even if I talk, like, I talk shit to you, I call you Megamind.

• 26:37Speaker 03

  Alright, which...

• 26:40Speaker 03

  Right, okay.

• 26:41Caleb Hammer?

  Why? He doesn't seem that bright.

• 26:43Speaker 03

  Well, as you-

• 26:43Speaker 04

  Look at the fucking forehead!

• 26:45Speaker 03

  As you pointed out, I have a receding hairline.

• 26:47Caleb Hammer?

  It is going away, bye-bye.

• 26:49Speaker 04

  He's got a big ass forehead. It's very shiny.

• 26:56Speaker 03

  I feel so loved at this table right now. I can feel the love here.

• 27:01Speaker 04

  Well, I mean, you wanted to, you wanted to come at me for no fucking reason.

• 27:05Speaker 03

  Are we coming at you because you can't shut your fucking mouth?

• 27:07Speaker 04

  Well, that has nothing to do with our finances.

• 27:08Speaker 03

  What do you mean it has nothing to do with our finances if I end up having to go to the fucking hospital because some dude beat me with a tire iron because of some stupid shit that you fucking said?

• 27:16Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I would say it has to do with the finances because if you guys try to have a conversation about finances, how can it happen if, well, he's saying you act like a bitch. Right now, he's the one that's blowing up.

• 27:27Speaker 04

  I know. He's acting like a bitch.

• 27:29Caleb Hammer?

  But if you, if you, if he's correct in saying you do when you try to have a financial conversation.

• 27:35Speaker 04

  I feel like I have to explain it to him like he's a child.

• 27:38Speaker 03

  Do I have to put a table in between us when we fucking argue?

• 27:40Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 27:41Speaker 03

  Because I'm afraid that you're gonna beat my fucking ass. What are you talking about? I have to have a fucking escape route. You are a six foot tall woman. Okay, I'm not trying to fuck with that. So, yeah, no, I just let shit go. And the reason I don't ask questions about the fucking finances when like the 12th fucking Amazon box this week shows up is because, yeah, I'm not trying to get beat.

• 28:02Speaker 04

  Okay. I'm tired of you already.

• 28:05Caleb Hammer?

  Well, tell me, how do these conversations go, though? Like, I need to know a little bit more.

• 28:10Speaker 04

  He will literally just sit there and stare at me like he's dumb. And I'm like, do you understand what I'm talking about?

• 28:14Speaker 03

  Because every time I fucking open my mouth.

• 28:15Speaker 04

  And I'm like, we have these bills to pay and he-

• 28:18Speaker 00

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• 28:47Speaker 04

  He's like, uh huh, uh huh. And I'm like, what the fuck are you doing? Do you even understand what I'm talking about half the time? I think it goes in one ear or not the other.

• 28:58Speaker 04

  That's why your head's so big.

• 28:59Caleb Hammer?

  Is that true?

• 29:00Speaker 04

  For a bear.

• 29:01Caleb Hammer?

  Is that true? You don't listen?

• 29:02Speaker 03

  No, I do. I do listen, but here's the thing is that she overreacts to every single little.

• 29:08Caleb Hammer?

  How? Like what?

• 29:09Speaker 03

  So like, for instance, she sees, oh, we have this bill coming up in three weeks. I don't know how we're gonna pay for it. And it's like, okay. So then I go dig in the collection of bullshit that I have, sell a few things. And I'm like, there we go. It's no big deal, but she'll worry up until that point. But that's why we buy shit like gold and silver. And that's why we keep that shit around is so when the spot price goes up, we sell that shit and get our money back and be able to pay bills when we're not employed.

• 29:35Caleb Hammer?

  What the, what are you talking about? That is still a volatile market, even though gold's has done quite well. Metals have done quite well.

• 29:41Speaker 03

  Gold's done really well.

• 29:42Caleb Hammer?

  You have $64,453.81 in debt. Why the are we getting assets? What?

• 29:48Speaker 03

  Well, it's.

• 29:49Caleb Hammer?

  Cause gold does well. It doesn't do better than 30%.

• 29:51Speaker 03

  No, it doesn't do better than.

• 29:52Caleb Hammer?

  Which is, what the are we talking about? And he also told Colton that you, you say you can't hide any purchases because she's like a bloodhound.

• 29:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 30:00Caleb Hammer?

  Why should you have to hide purchases?

• 30:02Speaker 03

  Well, see, I don't, that's, I just don't even try.

• 30:04Caleb Hammer?

  But why would you?

• 30:05Speaker 03

  Well.

• 30:06Caleb Hammer?

  What? If you're complaining about not being able to hide purchases, why would, why should you be hiding purchases?

• 30:10Speaker 03

  Well, cause somebody else.

• 30:11Speaker 04

  Cause he shouldn't be buying anything because he didn't have a job.

• 30:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, but like, and I acknowledge that. That's why I didn't even activate my debit card is what do I need it for?

• 30:18Speaker 04

  You still had Apple Pay. You had a PayPal card that was linked to our account. So it's not like you weren't spending.

• 30:25Caleb Hammer?

  I don't understand why you feel like you would need to hide purchases, though. Like, your complaint is that you're not allowed to hide purchases because she's a bloodhound.

• 30:33Speaker 03

  I mean, it wasn't.

• 30:33Caleb Hammer?

  But what the is that? Well, you shouldn't be hiding. Why? You think he hides? Does he hide?

• 30:38Speaker 04

  Yeah, all the time.

• 30:39Caleb Hammer?

  Tell me about it.

• 30:40Speaker 04

  He hides everything, actually. He lies about everything all the time.

• 30:43Caleb Hammer?

  You're a liar. So loser and a liar?

• 30:45Speaker 03

  Of course, of course.

• 30:46Caleb Hammer?

  What's the, what's the lie?

• 30:47Speaker 04

  Everything. Like, I swear to God, like, he's gotten tickets and he's like, oh, it's not my fault. They just pulled me over.

• 30:53Speaker 03

  And the body cam footage comes out.

• 30:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, the body cam from it. Yeah, on YouTube.

• 30:58Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 30:59Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 30:59Caleb Hammer?

  And what happened?

• 31:00Speaker 04

  He was speeding and he tried to tell me that he was like, oh, they just pulled me over for like-

• 31:04Speaker 03

  It was only 135 in a 70, wasn't it?

• 31:06Speaker 04

  Yeah, he's fucking stupid.

• 31:07Caleb Hammer?

  Cole, as a guy who goes fast.

• 31:09Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 31:10Caleb Hammer?

  Full MKBHD style.

• 31:11Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 31:12Caleb Hammer?

  I don't go that fast.

• 31:13Speaker 03

  I mean.

• 31:14Speaker 04

  Yeah, he lied about the whole thing and then the body cam footage came out and they're like, all you could see is the cop and then you just see him fly by. And I was like, are you fucking kidding me? You lied about this?

• 31:25Caleb Hammer?

  You've also said that he's super into investing, but it always destroys your savings.

• 31:30Speaker 03

  Sometimes if I come across a good deal for something that I know that can be flipped in the long run, I'll buy it, hold on to it for a month or two and then sell it.

• 31:38Speaker 04

  No, you don't hold on to it. You hold on to it forever and then we're in a bind. You're like, oh, I guess I'll sell it.

• 31:44Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, yeah, because that's what that shit is for.

• 31:46Speaker 04

  And your gold and silver bullshit.

• 31:48Speaker 03

  I'm, I mean, look.

• 31:49Speaker 04

  You just sold, first of all, you just sold all your gold and silver. How much did you get for it?

• 31:53Speaker 03

  Um, 500.

• 31:53Speaker 04

  No, you didn't. 170.

• 31:55Speaker 03

  Oh yeah, that's right. The two pieces I sold, yeah.

• 31:57Speaker 04

  Yeah, that helps so much.

• 31:59Caleb Hammer?

  That destroys the savings.

• 32:01Speaker 04

  He pulls money out of savings. Well, we don't really have savings anymore.

• 32:04Caleb Hammer?

  So if he just saves a few pennies, he immediately takes it and tries to turn it into-

• 32:07Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, so we had a little bit of savings, but he decided he needed a gun.

• 32:12Speaker 03

  Alright.

• 32:13Speaker 04

  So he went out and bought a new gun.

• 32:14Caleb Hammer?

  For why? You said it's because she goes crazy?

• 32:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, well-

• 32:16Speaker 04

  No.

• 32:16Caleb Hammer?

  Is that actually why?

• 32:17Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 32:18Speaker 04

  No.

• 32:18Speaker 03

  So.

• 32:19Speaker 04

  Don't even, you are-

• 32:20Speaker 03

  You are fucking nuts.

• 32:21Speaker 04

  No. You, don't even act like that's fucking why.

• 32:24Speaker 03

  That's definitely the reason.

• 32:25Speaker 04

  You literally are like, oh, we're going out to Dallas. Uh, let me pack my gun.

• 32:29Speaker 03

  Well, yes, because somebody likes to run their goddamn mouth. Really? We gonna talk about like, and part of it, not only that, like, I hold a security license where I sometimes am able to pick up armed gigs. And to do that, you have to furnish your own firearm.

• 32:43Speaker 04

  But that's the, yeah, you're like, oh, I-

• 32:45Speaker 03

  Not right now.

• 32:46Speaker 04

  No, you don't.

• 32:47Speaker 03

  Because they're kind of-

• 32:48Caleb Hammer?

  Your house needs money, dude. You weren't working for like six months.

• 32:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:52Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck is wrong with you? Why not go work? Dude, drop some McFries if necessary.

• 32:58Speaker 04

  Oh no, he said he would never work for food service.

• 33:00Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck is wrong with you? We've all put in our time.

• 33:03Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 33:03Caleb Hammer?

  I did it for like five years or so. The fuck's wrong with you? Put in your time, asshole.

• 33:08Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I guess like, I don't know, I'm just not-

• 33:10Caleb Hammer?

  Bills are bills are bills are bills. It doesn't matter. They don't discriminate.

• 33:14Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 33:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:15Caleb Hammer?

  You need to get a job. You do now, but you might need to work more because 6,000 dollars net being for the household and DFW, you guys are below the median for sure.

• 33:24Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 33:26Speaker 03

  Think the plan is to eventually hopefully get out of DFW.

• 33:28Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, his argument for the gun is that it's one of a kind and he'll earn money on it and sell it? Or sell it for your future kid or something. What the?

• 33:35Speaker 03

  Okay, so, um.

• 33:37Speaker 04

  I fucking.

• 33:38Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck are we on about dude?

• 33:39Speaker 03

  So, so like, look, I had a Glock, right? I sold the Glock, got 700 for it. And then I took the 700 and put it down on.

• 33:49Caleb Hammer?

  Down?

• 33:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:50Caleb Hammer?

  Down?

• 33:51Speaker 03

  So I put it in layaway, um, that because it didn't, it didn't gain interest. I made sure that it didn't gain interest.

• 33:57Speaker 04

  Yeah, and then we had to pay another $300 for it.

• 34:00Speaker 03

  But essentially I got the gun for 750. What the fuck are you talking about? And then I had it appraised because it was a, uh. So it had a special serial number. It had some features on it that were really interesting that I hadn't seen before. So I called the company.

• 34:16Caleb Hammer?

  What? You guys are dying in debt. You didn't have a job.

• 34:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:19Caleb Hammer?

  Still, you just got one and you haven't even started. The fuck, how is this even an option that we're even considering?

• 34:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, it was, it was an impulse purchase.

• 34:25Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, no shit. Your entire life is impulse, is it not?

• 34:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, pretty much.

• 34:28Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, you do nothing and then you think you can go get a big, an expensive gun, a special gun?

• 34:33Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 34:33Caleb Hammer?

  Cute, what is this? Xena, what was your thoughts when this was happening? What did you say?

• 34:37Speaker 04

  I was like.

• 34:37Caleb Hammer?

  What happened?

• 34:38Speaker 04

  Could have literally used that money for bills.

• 34:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:41Speaker 04

  To pay off at least one of my credit cards. And he was like, well, I felt like the gun was necessary, which it wasn't. Cause what the fuck do you need a gun for? We don't even go anywhere.

• 34:51Speaker 03

  I think that it's important for every household to own a firearm. We're in fucking Texas.

• 34:54Speaker 04

  My dad does. You don't need him.

• 34:55Speaker 03

  Your dad is also never home and.

• 34:58Speaker 04

  But you know where the guns are at.

• 35:00Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. So there's guns there.

• 35:02Speaker 04

  Exactly. And he knows where they are. And my dad has said that he could use them.

• 35:06Caleb Hammer?

  You also live in a town of like five people.

• 35:08Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 35:08Caleb Hammer?

  I assume you've seen one black person and you got, you freaked out.

• 35:11Speaker 04

  Probably.

• 35:12Speaker 03

  Hey, listen, I'm Arab. We're cool with the blacks. It's the white people that scare me.

• 35:16Caleb Hammer?

  But you are as white as it gets.

• 35:18Speaker 03

  If you could tell the TSA that, again, I would really appreciate it.

• 35:21Caleb Hammer?

  It is your last name, that's it.

• 35:22Speaker 03

  If I'm white.

• 35:22Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, when we're walking down the street, no one thinks you're, there's not a single person in this world. They see the name on your passport or whatever. That's what they see.

• 35:31Speaker 04

  Yeah, and then you bought this while you were unemployed.

• 35:33Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, that dad does not live with them. You live with dad.

• 35:37Speaker 04

  Yes, we moved in with my parents.

• 35:39Caleb Hammer?

  Thirty-one. Oh my, in a cheap ass, small town. What the are we doing? What is wrong with you guys?

• 35:46Speaker 04

  Well, so it was actually my parents' idea that we moved in with them. Every time we're around my brother-in-law, he's always talking to him, like, you gotta get your shit together. My dad's like, why are you doing this? Get your shit together. Even my mom is like, get your shit together.

• 35:59Caleb Hammer?

  To him?

• 35:59Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 36:00Caleb Hammer?

  Why the want you to listen to anyone? Do you have no shame?

• 36:03Speaker 03

  I mean, no, it's, well, now I'm starting to like, look, going through the whole thing with getting laid off and doing all that, I have been very immature, but I've just decided, like, I'm tired of living like this.

• 36:17Caleb Hammer?

  Oh bullshit. How long was it going? Well, everyone was shitting on him until he was like, oh, okay.

• 36:21Speaker 03

  I mean, about, about like.

• 36:22Speaker 04

  They're still shitting on him.

• 36:23Speaker 03

  They're still shitting on him.

• 36:24Caleb Hammer?

  Why are they shitting now?

• 36:26Speaker 04

  Because it, like, he just finally got a job. So now, like, the whole time, my dad is like, where, did you get a job?

• 36:31Caleb Hammer?

  And if we know anything about Hispanics, they're probably grinding.

• 36:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:34Caleb Hammer?

  They're probably working their dick off.

• 36:36Speaker 03

  Yeah. Well, one of them actually is also unemployed, I think.

• 36:39Caleb Hammer?

  Does he do things, though?

• 36:40Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 36:41Caleb Hammer?

  Well, there you go. You just gamed all night.

• 36:43Speaker 04

  You don't do anything.

• 36:46Speaker 04

  You can't even cook.

• 36:47Speaker 03

  That is true. I cannot cook.

• 36:49Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 36:50Speaker 03

  I would burn water.

• 36:50Speaker 04

  So I have to come home from work, that I have to get up to four AM, and then I come home and then I make dinner. And then I clean the kitchen.

• 37:00Caleb Hammer?

  Wait, why the do you do anything if you're a house husband?

• 37:03Speaker 04

  His mom didn't let him do anything. She cleaned, she cooked, she did everything.

• 37:07Caleb Hammer?

  Was she like full beekeeper?

• 37:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:10Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, so, yeah, I thought those ones were strict, but.

• 37:13Speaker 03

  No, she was, she was like, not really. So when mom and dad weren't at the bar, they felt like guilty.

• 37:23Caleb Hammer?

  Do they want her to be beekeeper?

• 37:25Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 37:26Caleb Hammer?

  They don't really care?

• 37:27Speaker 03

  No.

• 37:28Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, you said they're very strict.

• 37:30Speaker 04

  I told her from the beginning, like, I'm not a housewife.

• 37:32Speaker 03

  They definitely don't like how she, like...

• 37:34Speaker 04

  They don't like how, like...

• 37:36Speaker 03

  She makes more money.

• 37:37Speaker 04

  Direct I am.

• 37:38Speaker 03

  They don't like how she's...

• 37:38Caleb Hammer?

  What? I wish my girlfriend made more money than me, then we'd just be [bleep] rolling around in it. That's weird. I'll never understand that logic.

• 37:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, so he like...

• 37:46Caleb Hammer?

  Please make more money, let me stress less.

• 37:48Speaker 04

  Well, they're like traditional.

• 37:49Speaker 03

  Like, dad is eighty. Dad's eighty, to give you an idea. And mom is like sixty-five, so...

• 37:57Caleb Hammer?

  Oh.

• 37:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:58Caleb Hammer?

  And how old would, knowing where they came from, how old was she when they met?

• 38:03Speaker 03

  Uh, she actually was, she's from Florida. So she was at, yeah, so she was in like her thirties when they met.

• 38:09Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, nevermind.

• 38:10Speaker 04

  Uh, isn't she like Cherokee, though?

• 38:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, she's Cherokee, so she's a hundred percent Cherokee Indian, so I'm like...

• 38:16Caleb Hammer?

  And then she went beekeeper?

• 38:17Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:19Speaker 03

  Must have been a mailman involved or something, because I'm awfully white.

• 38:22Caleb Hammer?

  That's kinda crazy.

• 38:22Speaker 03

  She was a model in Florida for a while, too, and, like, yeah, so...

• 38:28Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd she do this to herself?

• 38:29Speaker 03

  Because dad has always statistically made a lot of money.

• 38:33Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, there's other people that make money that don't like lock you.

• 38:37Speaker 03

  I mean, like, [bleep], like, dad pretty much controlled the bar scene in the DFW area from like nineteen eighty-five to two thousand and ten.

• 38:46Caleb Hammer?

  How rich is your dad?

• 38:47Speaker 04

  He's not rich at all.

• 38:48Speaker 03

  Not anymore.

• 38:48Caleb Hammer?

  So what the [bleep]?

• 38:49Speaker 03

  Not anymore.

• 38:50Caleb Hammer?

  Controlled the bar scene in Detroit, Fort Worth?

• 38:52Speaker 03

  Well, no, I mean, like, he, no, in DFW, Fort, like, all of DFW, so dad had ten bars at one point in time.

• 38:59Caleb Hammer?

  There were probably more than ten bars in Detroit, Fort Worth, metropolitan area.

• 39:04Speaker 03

  No, those were just the ten that dad owned.

• 39:05Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 39:06Speaker 03

  And, but, basically, the amount of stuff that, he was making over, like, three million dollars a year at one point. We had a giant house, then the IRS came and [bleep] everything up because he wasn't paying his taxes.

• 39:15Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I don't think they [bleep] everything up, I think he did.

• 39:17Speaker 03

  Well, of course, you know, and I mean...

• 39:19Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 39:20Speaker 03

  You know, and I, like, own...

• 39:22Speaker 04

  He took after him and started his own little business, and of course it failed.

• 39:26Caleb Hammer?

  Wait, you did?

• 39:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, it hasn't failed.

• 39:28Caleb Hammer?

  Start a bar?

• 39:29Speaker 03

  No, not a bar. I, uh, so, because of my connections in the tactical community, I made...

• 39:34Caleb Hammer?

  In the what? Okay, I knew that this was gonna be a... No, no, in the what, community?

• 39:38Speaker 03

  It's like in the tactical community, so like...

• 39:40Caleb Hammer?

  What the [bleep] is that?

• 39:41Speaker 03

  So like Navy SEALs, uh, some people have sold my products to Navy SEALs, police forces.

• 39:47Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know what any of this is!

• 39:49Speaker 03

  I... I feel like I could.

• 39:51Speaker 04

  Yeah, but the thing is, is that he doesn't actually do it. I do all the work.

• 39:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:56Caleb Hammer?

  What? What are you talking about? Dude, you're do- you are doing what your dad did.

• 40:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:01Caleb Hammer?

  Except you're not actually going and making any money from it. You're using her in every way whatsoever. Making her do everything, but you're not going and making bread, which at least somewhere offsets it. You just do nothing. You game and she does all the work. She makes the jewelry, whatever the this is.

• 40:16Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 40:17Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck is wrong with you, dude? This makes no sense. I don't get it. What is even the jewel- do we have one? Is there an example? You have a picture?

• 40:25Speaker 03

  I could show you pictures.

• 40:26Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, show me a picture. What the fuck are we making?

• 40:28Speaker 03

  So.

• 40:30Caleb Hammer?

  What is it to military men?

• 40:32Speaker 03

  Um.

• 40:33Caleb Hammer?

  They're buying jewelry?

• 40:34Speaker 03

  Okay, so it looks like.

• 40:35Speaker 04

  Oh, it's just those little butt buddies.

• 40:37Speaker 03

  So it's like a, they're not really.

• 40:39Caleb Hammer?

  How did you make these friends?

• 40:41Speaker 03

  I'll plead the fifth on that one. There's.

• 40:44Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 40:45Speaker 03

  There's one right there. Um, so basically they're made out of Technora Kevlar cord. Um, the cord can cut through PVC pipe. It can cut through restraints. Um, the magnets can be used for.

• 40:57Caleb Hammer?

  They're beaded necklaces that these military men are purchasing. What the fuck are we talking about?

• 41:01Speaker 03

  Right, so they look, that's the whole idea behind them though and it.

• 41:05Caleb Hammer?

  Well, they look very gay.

• 41:06Speaker 03

  Have you heard of Ed Calderon?

• 41:07Caleb Hammer?

  Huh?

• 41:08Speaker 03

  Have you heard of Ed Calderon?

• 41:09Speaker 04

  Nobody has ever heard of him.

• 41:10Speaker 03

  No, he was on.

• 41:10Caleb Hammer?

  No, I have not.

• 41:12Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 41:12Caleb Hammer?

  He was on what?

• 41:13Speaker 03

  He was on the Joe Rogan Show. Um, Ed is a counter abduction specialist from Tijuana and I kind of got some of the ideas from him to start making these.

• 41:23Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, gay necklaces?

• 41:24Speaker 03

  Well, because, because the whole idea is, is if you have a handcuff key or the back, on the back of one or something like that, you get stopped by dudes that want to fuck you up. They take you, they don't normally take your jewelry, right? They, they take all of the other shit out of your pockets, knives.

• 41:37Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, your ancestors used to conquer Spain. You're making gay necklaces.

• 41:40Speaker 03

  I, I mean.

• 41:42Speaker 04

  He's not making them. I'm making them.

• 41:44Caleb Hammer?

  That's true. You're making your woman.

• 41:46Speaker 03

  You know, uh, if I have an extra one laying around, I'll send you one to the, to the shop so you can put it up with your LaBubu.

• 41:51Speaker 04

  Nobody wants it.

• 41:52Speaker 03

  So you can put it up with your LaBubu.

• 41:52Caleb Hammer?

  She, even she says nobody wants it.

• 41:55Speaker 03

  I mean, yeah.

• 41:55Speaker 04

  I mean, there's people that want it, but like, normal people don't want it.

• 41:59Caleb Hammer?

  Who are these people?

• 42:01Speaker 04

  They're just like, I don't know. They like, play with knives and guns and shit.

• 42:05Caleb Hammer?

  Knives and guns can be fun, but I don't understand why they want to be like a, hey, look, I'm a bottom type of necklace.

• 42:11Speaker 04

  It's like, they, they're like, it's a rosary and I'm like, I think it's kind of gay.

• 42:16Speaker 03

  And we love the gays.

• 42:17Speaker 04

  We do, we love the gays.

• 42:18Speaker 03

  But we have a gay right here and we love him.

• 42:20Speaker 04

  I know.

• 42:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 42:21Speaker 04

  We love him.

• 42:23Speaker 03

  So like the token. But it is very gay. I mean, well, I think part of it is, is that it's not supposed to look threatening. Right? So the whole. I'll confirm that. So the whole idea, so the whole idea is, is that the cordage that's on that, I actually have another video on that page that I will show you later. Where, let me show you something. I hate having to explain it because.

• 42:42Speaker 04

  No, no, no.

• 42:43Speaker 03

  Maybe do something normal.

• 42:44Speaker 04

  Explaining it. He, if you give him a chance to explain it, he will tell you all about it.

• 42:48Speaker 03

  I fucking. You're also not the one who makes it.

• 42:50Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 42:50Speaker 03

  I mean, in the beginning I did. Why'd you stop?

• 42:53Speaker 04

  No, you didn't. Even in the beginning, you're like, I need you to do it because you're so much faster than me.

• 42:58Speaker 03

  Why'd you stop?

• 42:59Speaker 04

  Because he couldn't keep up.

• 43:00Speaker 03

  Nothing. Okay, what is the game?

• 43:04Speaker 04

  What is it? Call of Duty?

• 43:05Speaker 03

  No, I don't really, I play like vintage games. So I download.

• 43:09Speaker 04

  I actually don't know what he plays.

• 43:10Speaker 03

  All night, you're playing vintage video games? Yeah. So I download like old Game Boy games. What? Let me think. I just got done playing Mother 3, which is a Japanese. So all day she's grinding, you're playing Mother 3? Yeah, downloading Game Boy games. I just played The Suffering on PlayStation 2. That was fun.

• 43:33Speaker 05

  You came for the finances, but what if you could have more?

• 43:40Speaker 05

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• 43:46Speaker 03

  Your time 100%.

• 43:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 43:49Speaker 03

  But.

• 43:49Speaker 05

  Juicy post shows.

• 43:51Caleb Hammer?

  You were doing this behind his back.

• 43:52Speaker 05

  One of them, I've actually never seen this photo. Spicy audit breakdowns.

• 43:57Caleb Hammer?

  We still don't film with people like that. Like he is a next level.

• 44:00Speaker 05

  Audit updates.

• 44:01Speaker 04

  I'm seeing a therapist now. Personally or romantically or both?

• 44:06Speaker 05

  Behind the scenes moments.

• 44:11Speaker 05

  And budget buddy surprises.

• 44:15Speaker 05

  And for this month only, you can get all of this for free. Join with the link in the pinned comment or description below. Submit proof of purchase at hammerelite.com and we will reimburse you for your first month with a $10 digital gift card that can be spent anywhere in most countries. You have no idea what you're in for.

• 44:38Caleb Hammer?

  Starbucks is bullsh** and a waste of money. And you already know that by making your coffee at home and investing the rest. So now you need to do that with your energy drink as well. Make Gamer Subs at home for just 40 cents a serving. And honestly, it literally tastes better. And we proved this accidentally via a blind taste test in our Hammer Elite show, Fat and Fatter.

• 45:02Speaker 03

  The number one ranked energy drink is Gamer Subs. Literally, the cherry flavor is insane.

• 45:08Caleb Hammer?

  Listen, you can also get free samples to see if you like it. Or 10% off your order at gamersubs.gg or click that link in the description below. Type in code Caleb. What if we have to pay for like? Does he have an extra gaming room? No. No. He just sits on the couch. What, where? In the living room? Yeah. In the living room where everyone else in the house that everyone else lives in. Mm-hmm. No wonder they hate you.

• 45:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean.

• 45:33Caleb Hammer?

  Well, we have our own living room. Yeah, but they see you do this all day, not providing for their sister, not providing for their daughter. What the f**k? Of course they hate you. What? You are pathetic.

• 45:45Speaker 03

  Sure, I mean I-

• 45:46Caleb Hammer?

  What do your military bros think of you? They think he's the coolest person in the world. No way possible. How do they think that? Cause he's a bullshitter.

• 45:54Speaker 03

  Well, that and uh-

• 45:56Caleb Hammer?

  Mm-hmm.

• 45:58Speaker 00

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• 46:27Speaker 03

  That I I've kept my identity pretty like separate from that.

• 46:31Caleb Hammer?

  What identity? What are you talking about?

• 46:32Speaker 03

  Identity? So like, okay, like.

• 46:33Caleb Hammer?

  You don't have it. Your identity is playing Mama 3 or whatever.

• 46:37Speaker 03

  So I like, uh.

• 46:39Speaker 04

  I don't even know what that is.

• 46:40Speaker 03

  So I like kept my private, my personal life private because.

• 46:44Caleb Hammer?

  What personal life?

• 46:45Speaker 03

  So like, they don't know anything about my private life at all when I sell that stuff because I don't really like, I didn't even really want to come do this. I don't like to put arts.

• 46:54Caleb Hammer?

  Why the are you here?

• 46:55Speaker 04

  Cause I forced him to.

• 46:57Caleb Hammer?

  Good, good, good. Yeah, we like, you know, big Xena fans here.

• 47:00Speaker 03

  I just kinda, I'm a very private person.

• 47:03Speaker 04

  No, you're not. You'll talk about yourself all the time.

• 47:07Speaker 03

  But.

• 47:07Speaker 04

  You fucking will. You never shut up.

• 47:09Caleb Hammer?

  So what is this? So you're not private? You're just.

• 47:12Speaker 03

  I just don't like people knowing certain things.

• 47:15Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you're telling me everything without me barely even asking.

• 47:18Speaker 04

  Exactly. I was like, you will literally.

• 47:20Speaker 03

  What was agreed upon.

• 47:21Speaker 04

  You will tell everything.

• 47:23Caleb Hammer?

  It is a podcast.

• 47:24Speaker 03

  That's what we agreed upon is what's the point of me coming on if I'm not going to offer you all of the information immediately?

• 47:29Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, I gotta get some of these finances. I gotta get into this. This is, but I'm, I'm very nervous of how your guys' situation works. It's just your existence in this relationship makes me nervous for the future of this. Well, come on. You haven't worked. You just got a job and it's not much for the Dallas area.

• 47:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 47:47Caleb Hammer?

  And honestly, you don't make much for the Dallas area either. Luckily, we're in a smaller town and you guys must not have much overhead because, so I don't even understand how we're struggling if we're living at home.

• 47:57Caleb Hammer?

  And yet going out to eat, what did we spend last month as a household, do we think?

• 48:01Speaker 03

  I don't even want to fucking know, dude.

• 48:03Caleb Hammer?

  Well, guess.

• 48:04Speaker 03

  20 grand?

• 48:07Speaker 03

  Take a guess.

• 48:07Speaker 04

  Okay, he's retarded.

• 48:08Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, you're right. That G D will be very difficult.

• 48:11Speaker 03

  Mama, mama said the TV was the devil.

• 48:13Speaker 04

  Yeah, like I said, he doesn't know anything about our finances.

• 48:16Caleb Hammer?

  20 grand? Xena?

• 48:18Speaker 04

  I think like maybe like 7,000.

• 48:22Speaker 04

  I don't know, like

• 48:25Caleb Hammer?

  It was $800, which is insane for a house that makes no money because you didn't even have this job yet. 7,000, you don't bring even net with him bringing in money at 6,000 a month. Once he starts his job, both of you combined. 7,000.

• 48:42Speaker 04

  I have no idea.

• 48:43Speaker 03

  So apparently she don't know numbers either.

• 48:45Speaker 04

  I know.

• 48:46Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, it was $2,000 all combined at a minimum and there's some unknowns that we'll go through, but what the fuck? What the fuck? I mean, you were spending last month on the income that came in of that 3,200. 63% with the bullshit minimum and it's probably closer to 70, 75, 80. Okay, what do we think the combined household financial score is? Zero to 10, zero being the worst, 10 being the best. What do we think it is, guys?

• 49:12Speaker 03

  I think a three.

• 49:14Speaker 04

  I think a zero.

• 49:15Caleb Hammer?

  All right. If you want your hammer financial score, see where you stand in the world of finances by taking the free assessment at Calebhammer.com. See what you need to do to improve your life or where you're already doing good or where you are just doing horrible. It's free, Calebhammer.com. And if you don't want to be like a guest who ends up on the show, you'll actually know your numbers if you download the Dollar Wise Budgeting app. There's a free trial to see if you like it. And if you do, sign up for the annual version because it saves a lot of money and it comes with a special little bonus where I sign my personal budget friendly cookbook and mail it directly to you. Only exists for a couple more months and then it's gone forever towards the beginning of 2026, which this honestly might even be uploaded at that point. So it was like our backlog's so big these days, who knows? So yeah, check that out, Dollar Wise, that app. All the links are in the description below.

• 49:58Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, we gotta get into this. Okay, CarMax. First of all, CarMax horrible choice because this is, everything's overpriced. This is, this is, it's brutal. No negotiating. It's just bad.

• 50:07Speaker 03

  I got fucking yelled at by her, by the way, for saying that that price was bullshit and that we needed to negotiate. And that we needed to negotiate. And then she got

• 50:15Caleb Hammer?

  You can't negotiate.

• 50:16Speaker 04

  They don't negotiate.

• 50:17Speaker 03

  Well, and that's when I told her we probably shouldn't. Also, I didn't like the salesman, like I

• 50:21Speaker 04

  The sale, there was nothing wrong. The salesman was super nice and super helpful.

• 50:25Speaker 03

  A car that smelled like cigarettes and you were like, okay, yeah.

• 50:27Speaker 04

  No, I didn't. I said, no. I mean, he did say that they would detail it for free to get the

• 50:33Speaker 03

  You don't ever trust a fucking used car salesman to do something after you buy the car. That.

• 50:39Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah. So what happened? What?

• 50:41Speaker 04

  Hmm. You, yeah. What, what happened?

• 50:45Speaker 04

  He wrecked my fucking car.

• 50:47Speaker 03

  I didn't wreck.

• 50:48Speaker 04

  How many accidents now?

• 50:49Speaker 03

  All right, a fucking teenager hit me when I was driving her car.

• 50:53Speaker 04

  I had fourteen hundred dollars.

• 50:55Caleb Hammer?

  Do we have, now that we know he lies about, do we have the police camera that?

• 50:59Speaker 03

  Yes, we have the police report.

• 51:01Caleb Hammer?

  CCTV? We have the police report.

• 51:03Speaker 04

  I mean, the insurance found the other driver at fault, so I'm assuming that's correct.

• 51:06Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, which means it probably covered your car, then?

• 51:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 51:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, I did, but I only had fourteen hundred dollars left to pay on my car.

• 51:13Caleb Hammer?

  But did it not cover the value of the car?

• 51:15Speaker 04

  No, it did.

• 51:16Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 51:16Speaker 04

  But I almost was free of a car payment.

• 51:18Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I know, but you could roll that value into a small car balance, because what did they give you? What did insurance give you?

• 51:24Speaker 04

  Uh, six thousand.

• 51:26Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, and that wipes out a thousand five hundred, there you go, five thousand to put down on a ten thousand, giving you a five thousand loan, yeah, it sucks, but that's not that bad. So, but what was the issue? Because, oh, because we owe twenty six thousand one hundred fifteen, so it's not like we did, we did the right thing anyway, by any means. What the is this? What happened?

• 51:43Speaker 03

  I didn't pick the car, I had nothing to do with buying that car, that's all.

• 51:46Caleb Hammer?

  Why did it have to be this car?

• 51:48Speaker 04

  Because I wanted a car that was gonna last a long time.

• 51:51Caleb Hammer?

  That could be any car, not necessarily, but get a car looked at, yeah.

• 51:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, my other car lasted me a long time until he wrecked it.

• 51:58Caleb Hammer?

  Well, there you go, so you know you didn't need this car.

• 52:00Speaker 03

  I didn't fucking wreck it, some chopped ass teenager that was playing like Fetty Wap or whatever, fucking merged into my lane when I wasn't looking and fucking slammed into me when he was, all right. So first of all, if you could tell me how it's my fucking fault that I'm in the middle of a lane, and this motherfucker hits me this way? By merging into me when I am very clearly there, without fucking using a signal or anything? So bad, the cop even came out and was like, oh dude, this is open and shit, he's a hundred percent at fault. Filled out the police report, and then fucking lady, his mom shows up, who wasn't even there, and was like, you hit him, this was injustice, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, all this other fucking bullshit, only to come to find out that her son, her chopped ass Edgar looking vector from Despicable Me motherfucker haircut,

• 52:45Speaker 03

  ran into me. So, not my fucking fault, stop saying I wrecked your car, some chopped ass teenager wrecked your fucking car.

• 52:53Caleb Hammer?

  Listening to Fetty Wap?

• 52:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 52:55Caleb Hammer?

  All right, we need to get Tyler in here. Get down, gentlemen, thank you. Um, he, uh, got in a car crash, and he's very upset that they're playing Fetty Wap, and, but called them an Edgar.

• 53:08Caleb Hammer?

  Who do you hate more here? He bought guns because of, uh...

• 53:11Speaker 03

  Well, no.

• 53:13Caleb Hammer?

  He admitted.

• 53:14Speaker 03

  No, we did not admit that I bought guns because of... I bought guns because of my crazy-ass fucking wife. Has nothing to do with either of these people here.

• 53:22Caleb Hammer?

  So who do we hate more?

• 53:23Speaker 03

  I think the one in the middle.

• 53:25Caleb Hammer?

  Nooo. No, no, no, no, no. He has the haircut of the hair... of the car crash.

• 53:31Speaker 03

  Has nothing to do with the haircut.

• 53:32Caleb Hammer?

  Bought the guns for that.

• 53:33Speaker 03

  And I mean, honestly, I don't have any problem with either of you. My problem is with you.

• 53:39Speaker 04

  Why?

• 53:39Caleb Hammer?

  Why?

• 53:40Speaker 03

  I don't know. You've been fucking beating my ass up the whole time.

• 53:43Caleb Hammer?

  Well, it's because you're a loser. We all do.

• 53:47Speaker 03

  I mean, no, no, no, no.

• 53:51Speaker 03

  Listen, it has nothing to do... I'm sure you're both wonderful. And that was fucked up.

• 53:55Caleb Hammer?

  What?

• 53:56Speaker 03

  Oh, okay, so you bring in like the two fucking ends of the stereotypes he saw?

• 53:59Caleb Hammer?

  Hold on, hold on, hold on.

• 54:02Speaker 03

  Bro, I'm Arab, I'm not white, I'm not gonna fucking like...

• 54:05Caleb Hammer?

  Hold on, I have all the stereotypes in this office, thank you.

• 54:07Speaker 03

  Of course, why, so you can gerrymander to fucking bring him back in to tip a fucking...

• 54:12Caleb Hammer?

  Yes.

• 54:13Speaker 03

  Diversity hires, DEI?

• 54:15Caleb Hammer?

  Whoa, whoa!

• 54:18Caleb Hammer?

  If you want your... If you want your Hammer racist score, get it at CalebHammer.com/racist. See where you stand in the world of racism, whether you need to be more racist or less racist. That is CalebHammer.com/racist. So, okay, you didn't want to get this car?

• 54:34Speaker 04

  I didn't, at first.

• 54:35Caleb Hammer?

  Then why the fuck did we get it? Or you said he's crashing multiple cars?

• 54:38Speaker 04

  No, no, no, he crashed my car multiple times.

• 54:41Speaker 03

  I did hit a parked car once.

• 54:42Caleb Hammer?

  What are we doing?

• 54:43Speaker 04

  Being a dumbass?

• 54:45Speaker 03

  All right, so, one, one was definitely my fault. I'll admit to that.

• 54:49Speaker 04

  No.

• 54:50Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, you told us earlier you're going 130.

• 54:52Speaker 03

  Well, that's not in her fucking fusion, or whatever.

• 54:56Speaker 04

  You leave my car, that car was my car.

• 54:58Caleb Hammer?

  But we know you drive insane.

• 55:00Speaker 03

  I mean...

• 55:00Caleb Hammer?

  I've been out saying you go 165.

• 55:02Speaker 03

  I mean, I, yeah, I did get pulled over going 165 the other day by a state trooper.

• 55:06Caleb Hammer?

  Were you not arrested for that?

• 55:07Speaker 03

  No, I got a warning.

• 55:07Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, that's crazy.

• 55:08Speaker 03

  I have the warning in the car, too.

• 55:10Caleb Hammer?

  That's crazy.

• 55:11Speaker 03

  I do not speed like that if there's other people on the road.

• 55:13Caleb Hammer?

  You got pulled over by a state trooper, there were other people on the... See him? Yeah, but that means there were other people around, asshole.

• 55:20Speaker 03

  No, there wasn't!

• 55:20Caleb Hammer?

  He was!

• 55:21Speaker 03

  Well, right, but if he's hit, all right, first of all, those motherfuckers use like stealth camouflage.

• 55:25Speaker 04

  You got pulled over in the middle of the day.

• 55:26Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah.

• 55:27Speaker 04

  So, yeah, people were around.

• 55:28Caleb Hammer?

  No, there was nobody around.

• 55:29Speaker 04

  Yes, there were. Yeah, you're on the toll road.

• 55:31Caleb Hammer?

  That's impossible.

• 55:32Speaker 03

  Open stretch of highway on the toll road.

• 55:33Caleb Hammer?

  Texas toll road, no one around, fuck you, always somewhere.

• 55:37Speaker 03

  Alright, so there were some people around, but at the same time, like, I fucking.

• 55:42Speaker 04

  Again, with the lying.

• 55:44Caleb Hammer?

  So it's a Ford Edge 2022, yeah, twenty six thousand, one hundred and fifteen dollars.

• 55:49Speaker 04

  Mm hmm.

• 55:50Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, fourteen percent interest rate, what the fuck are we doing, guys?

• 55:53Speaker 03

  You're gonna be pissed at mine.

• 55:54Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, for fuck's sake, with a minimum monthly payment of five hundred thirty four dollars and eighty one cents. What are we doing?

• 56:00Speaker 04

  It was gonna be, okay, so the interest rate was gonna be nineteen percent, but my dad cosigned for me. So he doesn't have the best credit either, so that's why we got thirteen percent. But I wanted a good reliable car that was gonna last a while.

• 56:14Caleb Hammer?

  Car and you got a Ford, get a Toyota.

• 56:16Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 56:16Speaker 04

  I couldn't find a Toyota within my price range.

• 56:19Caleb Hammer?

  You went to CarMax, you couldn't, like, everything's out of any reasonable range regardless. Cause they're all overpriced, what do you think it's worth?

• 56:25Speaker 04

  Like twenty thousand?

• 56:27Caleb Hammer?

  Eighteen.

• 56:27Speaker 03

  I was gonna say, yeah, it's already depreciated.

• 56:30Caleb Hammer?

  We're seeing eighteen.

• 56:31Speaker 04

  Ooh.

• 56:32Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I mean, Edmunds is appraising at eighteen thousand, one hundred and twenty three, and we find them to be the most reliable source for valuing cars better, so that's what we use now, you agree?

• 56:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, I agree, I've used them in the past.

• 56:43Caleb Hammer?

  Exactly, Edmunds is great, so that's what we started using now, so eighteen thousand.

• 56:50Speaker 03

  Which I told you.

• 56:50Caleb Hammer?

  You don't have equity to trade in, I mean, that's a good place for equity trade ins, but it's not right now, cause you don't have it.

• 56:56Speaker 04

  Yeah, and I put three thousand down on it.

• 56:59Caleb Hammer?

  But you got five thousand for the car?

• 57:01Speaker 04

  I gave my dad.

• 57:02Caleb Hammer?

  No, you got seven thousand, but five thousand afterwards.

• 57:04Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 57:04Caleb Hammer?

  After the paying off the last.

• 57:06Speaker 04

  I gave my dad a thousand.

• 57:08Caleb Hammer?

  How many people live in this house, by the way?

• 57:10Speaker 04

  It's four.

• 57:11Caleb Hammer?

  What, I thought you said sibs, you got siblings?

• 57:13Speaker 04

  No, they're all married.

• 57:14Speaker 03

  Oh, they're all married and.

• 57:15Caleb Hammer?

  You guys are married.

• 57:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, but they, but they like live in their.

• 57:18Caleb Hammer?

  They're adults, yeah, they're adults.

• 57:20Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 57:20Caleb Hammer?

  What do I see past due? No current amount due, oh, woo, got nervous, Western Funding, what is this?

• 57:28Speaker 03

  That's my car.

• 57:30Caleb Hammer?

  What is your car?

• 57:31Speaker 03

  Uh, a bubble car. A giant fucking money pit.

• 57:35Caleb Hammer?

  What kind of car asshole?

• 57:37Speaker 03

  Volkswagen GTI. Autobahn.

• 57:41Caleb Hammer?

  It's a fast car. What is that?

• 57:42Speaker 03

  It's a turbo car, little tiny.

• 57:44Caleb Hammer?

  What's it, zero to sixty?

• 57:45Speaker 03

  Uh, two point three seconds on gravel.

• 57:47Speaker 04

  It's ugly as fuck.

• 57:49Caleb Hammer?

  On gravel?

• 57:50Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's the only place I've tested it.

• 57:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 57:52Speaker 03

  I mean, it's a fast car. It's a piece of shit.

• 57:54Caleb Hammer?

  It's the first time someone's come in and actually is able to...

• 57:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's why I was talking shit about your Tesla.

• 57:58Caleb Hammer?

  Beat my... Well, yeah, I'm 2.5.

• 58:00Speaker 03

  Yeah. I mean, we're close enough.

• 58:01Caleb Hammer?

  We're close. Well, you owe $17,479 on this death trap with a minimum monthly payment of $493.47. And what is this interest rate? Because you said it's horrible.

• 58:12Speaker 03

  It's stupid. I think it's like 19.

• 58:14Caleb Hammer?

  What are we doing? Why? When'd you get this and why?

• 58:16Speaker 03

  So, okay.

• 58:17Caleb Hammer?

  Why was he driving your car in Brooklyn? He has this.

• 58:19Speaker 03

  So here's what happened.

• 58:19Speaker 04

  Because his car was in the shop.

• 58:21Speaker 03

  So I had, so I had a Cadillac.

• 58:22Speaker 04

  Mmm, ooh, this story's so fun.

• 58:25Caleb Hammer?

  You have a sticker on it that says, "Only gay cops pull me over." And they didn't give you a ticket?

• 58:29Speaker 03

  No.

• 58:30Caleb Hammer?

  Maybe they found it funny.

• 58:31Speaker 03

  I had a Cadillac, wasn't paying attention one day, was speeding, came around a corner, saw a bunch of brake lights, too late, rear-ended somebody, totaled the Cadillac. So after I totaled the Cadillac, um, which was also a performance car, I went and, uh, dad insisted again that we go to this one motor.

• 58:48Caleb Hammer?

  Is it here?

• 58:49Speaker 03

  No, it's not here. I didn't drive it.

• 58:51Caleb Hammer?

  What the?

• 58:51Speaker 03

  I didn't drive it here.

• 58:52Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but it's an interesting topic. We could have taken a look at it.

• 58:55Speaker 03

  I, I mean, well, I wasn't sure it was gonna make it up here. That's...

• 58:59Caleb Hammer?

  What the?

• 59:00Speaker 03

  Okay, so like...

• 59:00Caleb Hammer?

  You owe an 18% interest rate loan with 500 hours a month, $17,479 balance on a car you don't even know if it'll make it here?

• 59:07Speaker 03

  Well, okay, so we've had it and I, look dude, this was the stupidest fucking decision I ever made, but my dad was really pushing for me to get this particular fucking car. I wanted to go, she wanted to go look other places. I wanted to go look other places, but dad was like, "No."

• 59:21Speaker 04

  No.

• 59:21Caleb Hammer?

  Why do we give a fuck about this guy?

• 59:23Speaker 03

  Because...

• 59:23Caleb Hammer?

  You've already decided he was bad a long time ago.

• 59:25Speaker 03

  It took, well, it took like, it took a big fucking...

• 59:29Caleb Hammer?

  Why did he want this?

• 59:30Speaker 03

  Because, okay, my parents, like, both of them drive Mercedes. They can't afford, okay, like, they're drowning in fucking debt because dad used to be rich. And so it's the opulence thing, right? Dad was like, "No son of mine is..."

• 59:41Caleb Hammer?

  I just looked up a picture. It doesn't even look that cool.

• 59:42Speaker 03

  But dad, it's not. And I actually kinda quite...

• 59:46Speaker 04

  No, hold on, because you absolutely wanted this car.

• 59:48Speaker 03

  I quite like it.

• 59:49Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 59:49Speaker 03

  Even though it's a money bet.

• 59:50Speaker 04

  He was like, "I want a GTI."

• 59:51Caleb Hammer?

  There we go. That sounds like the real reason, not Papa.

• 59:53Speaker 03

  But we only had, well, we had two options. It was either a Buick Les Sabre, which would have been a better choice.

• 59:58Caleb Hammer?

  Or there's a lot more cars actually out there. But dad, but dad was like, Don't care. You need to go to this one place and if you do not go to this one place, Well, I do not care what dad says.

• 1:00:07Speaker 03

  Okay, look, I'm a piece of shit. Like, we've acknowledged that, right? And so like, one of the only things in this world that gives me peace is speed. And I don't know how to-

• 1:00:18Caleb Hammer?

  You have seven escape and evasion incidents on your record.

• 1:00:20Speaker 03

  I mean, not anymore.

• 1:00:21Caleb Hammer?

  Seven.

• 1:00:22Speaker 03

  Not anymore.

• 1:00:22Caleb Hammer?

  You've had. That's insanity.

• 1:00:26Speaker 03

  Yeah. I mean, look, if you know they can't catch you, what's the point?

• 1:00:29Caleb Hammer?

  They have.

• 1:00:30Speaker 03

  No. Okay, so the only reason they caught me, and first of all, that was when I had my motorcycle. So I had a Suzuki Hiabusa.

• 1:00:35Caleb Hammer?

  Oh my gosh. How you're alive, I have no idea. Also, by the way, you have, like, your equity position, according to Edmunds, is literally 7,000.

• 1:00:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, that car's stupid. No, I should have never bought that car.

• 1:00:46Caleb Hammer?

  You have no equity. You're underwater by 10,000.

• 1:00:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's stupid. I-

• 1:00:49Speaker 04

  Oh my god.

• 1:00:50Caleb Hammer?

  You didn't know that?

• 1:00:50Speaker 04

  No. You know what? No, he said that like, his car was worth like 13,000. So I was like, okay, maybe like 5,000, but to find out that it's only worth 7,000 dollars?

• 1:01:01Speaker 03

  After we put well-

• 1:01:02Speaker 04

  It's stupid.

• 1:01:03Speaker 03

  10 grand in parts in six months, we've owned it.

• 1:01:06Caleb Hammer?

  Income tax? For 2021?

• 1:01:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:01:10Speaker 04

  For all-

• 1:01:11Caleb Hammer?

  2022. Oh, for a 4, 3, 2, and not one, but for the last three years, who's owing income tax?

• 1:01:18Speaker 04

  We both are.

• 1:01:19Speaker 03

  Whoa, hey.

• 1:01:20Speaker 04

  Well-

• 1:01:21Speaker 03

  For once, I'm not the fucking target here. There's another person sitting at this table.

• 1:01:25Caleb Hammer?

  Why?

• 1:01:26Speaker 03

  There we go.

• 1:01:26Speaker 04

  No, hold on. That's for both of us. That is for both of us, actually. You don't get enough taxes taken out because you don't know how to fill out your W-2.

• 1:01:37Caleb Hammer?

  Wait, so that would be on you then?

• 1:01:39Speaker 03

  No, no.

• 1:01:40Speaker 04

  I mean, I think it's on both of us, obviously.

• 1:01:42Speaker 03

  This might be an equal blame one that I'll take.

• 1:01:44Caleb Hammer?

  Do you put enough aside?

• 1:01:46Speaker 03

  Fuck, no.

• 1:01:46Speaker 04

  No.

• 1:01:47Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, then what the fuck are you doing? Why don't either of you?

• 1:01:50Speaker 04

  Well, this year I had to go tax exempt because I wasn't making enough to cover our bills. So I know for next year, we're definitely gonna owe.

• 1:01:58Caleb Hammer?

  Well, this is a bill. Your taxes are a bill. You don't get to choose paying taxes.

• 1:02:02Speaker 04

  I've never had to pay into taxes. So when it started, I was like, I can't pay this. And so it's just progressed over each year.

• 1:02:09Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck are you doing? Yeah, you owe taxes. To the federal government of $2,207.61. That's over the course of three years total. Are you on a payment plan yet?

• 1:02:21Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:02:22Caleb Hammer?

  What's the monthly payment?

• 1:02:23Speaker 04

  A hundred dollars.

• 1:02:24Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, for fuck's sake, that's gonna take forever and interest and fees and bullshit. Usually they're fed rate plus two, three. So what do they have? Seven, eight, nine percent? Something like that?

• 1:02:33Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:02:34Caleb Hammer?

  What a mess. Easy Pay Leasing? What is this?

• 1:02:38Speaker 04

  That is this car repairs. We had to finance it because I couldn't afford it.

• 1:02:43Speaker 03

  Not happy about it either.

• 1:02:45Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd you get into this car? Oh, we already went over it.

• 1:02:48Speaker 03

  So when I got it.

• 1:02:48Caleb Hammer?

  What a stupid thing. Why didn't you just give up? Start over. Repo. Fuck it.

• 1:02:53Speaker 03

  What did I fucking tell you he was gonna say?

• 1:02:55Speaker 04

  Then what are you gonna drive to work?

• 1:02:57Speaker 03

  Fucking, I have said for the.

• 1:02:58Caleb Hammer?

  No, I agree. I would have done that in the past and then tried to figure out a car situation.

• 1:03:02Speaker 03

  Like dude, I've told her many times, we just need.

• 1:03:04Caleb Hammer?

  You're also fucking past due on it, so.

• 1:03:06Speaker 03

  No, we're not.

• 1:03:07Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you are.

• 1:03:08Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:03:09Speaker 03

  Asshole.

• 1:03:10Speaker 04

  It's bi-.

• 1:03:10Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck?

• 1:03:11Speaker 04

  I don't have, like, it's like I have to figure out what bills I can pay. Because I'm having to pay like a hundred and seventy-seven dollars for a car repair every two weeks for you.

• 1:03:21Caleb Hammer?

  You're not going to make it money. What are you complaining about, bitch?

• 1:03:24Speaker 03

  I mean.

• 1:03:25Caleb Hammer?

  How can we pay bills if we don't make money when you sit on your ass, play video games all night? Mama Three all night.

• 1:03:30Speaker 03

  Fair.

• 1:03:30Caleb Hammer?

  Fuck you.

• 1:03:31Speaker 04

  I have a feeling you don't have any room to talk. Because you don't even know where finance is, actually.

• 1:03:35Speaker 03

  To be here. Like, you dragged me on this show.

• 1:03:38Caleb Hammer?

  Then I understand why you wanted him to come on. But if he doesn't want to be here and he doesn't give a fuck, then you're never gonna make it.

• 1:03:44Speaker 03

  It's not that I, it's not that I don't give a fuck. It's just like, I don't have answers to all this shit.

• 1:03:48Speaker 04

  We're here because I'm hoping he will realize that he needs to get his shit together. Otherwise, our marriage isn't gonna work.

• 1:03:55Caleb Hammer?

  I agree. What's the ultimatum? Cause there should be.

• 1:03:57Speaker 04

  Like he needs to get his shit together, otherwise.

• 1:03:59Caleb Hammer?

  What does that look like in by when?

• 1:04:01Speaker 04

  Like hopefully within the next year, you get your shit together. Cause like, we wanna start a family, but.

• 1:04:06Speaker 00

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• 1:04:35Speaker 04

  Obviously we can't.

• 1:04:36Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, what does shit together look like? By end of 2026, what does this need to look like for the marriage to continue? Because that is actually valid. Not out of love, but out of she doesn't want you dragging her down the rest of her life. And that is fair.

• 1:04:48Speaker 03

  And I can understand that.

• 1:04:49Caleb Hammer?

  So what is the ultimatum?

• 1:04:51Speaker 04

  Divorce.

• 1:04:52Caleb Hammer?

  No, no, no. What do the finances need to look like? What does he need to? What does, what does it need to look like? What does, what he does look like?

• 1:04:59Speaker 03

  Degree brain.

• 1:05:00Speaker 04

  He needs to understand our finances. He needs to realize that he needs to work harder to get a better job.

• 1:05:06Caleb Hammer?

  What does he have to do? What does it need to look like? What does he need to commit to?

• 1:05:09Speaker 03

  Go to fucking school? Like, what do you want me to fucking do?

• 1:05:11Speaker 04

  Yes, that's what I told you to do.

• 1:05:14Caleb Hammer?

  School for what though? Like there's, that's, that's very broad.

• 1:05:18Speaker 04

  Like I want him to figure out what he wants to do with his life. He's 31.

• 1:05:22Caleb Hammer?

  I agree. You need to figure out what you're doing. Like what the, you, you have nothing. What are your interests, dude? What are your interests?

• 1:05:28Speaker 03

  I mean, I'm really, really good with electronics and vehicles.

• 1:05:30Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, then do something in IT or be automotive, be a technician.

• 1:05:34Speaker 03

  Dude, I have a buddy that just went to school for fucking welding and he makes the same amount as I do without a fucking degree. I guess he's a shitty welder, but.

• 1:05:43Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I don't know. I can't speak for welding, but I do know that in the car industry, if you're actually working for a successful business, you can do well.

• 1:05:49Speaker 03

  I mean, I would love to do automotive or IT. I like.

• 1:05:52Caleb Hammer?

  Then do something dude. Why, why not? You already, you know, okay.

• 1:05:56Speaker 03

  Because.

• 1:05:56Caleb Hammer?

  That's what he selected. So he knows what he wants to do. Then do it.

• 1:05:58Speaker 03

  But I mean, school costs fucking money.

• 1:06:01Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you can get student loans in your position. But I thought student loans were bad, Caleb. What? Every time I watch this show with a very few times I have. And you haven't watched and you're a moron. It is debt. What is bad is borrowing for bullshit. What is bad is borrowing for a bullshit degree. Borrowing to go to a college just for the sports team. Borrowing to spend on things like cars and stuff, which many people do with their student loans. If you're going to trade school and you are getting some student loans, which might not be subsidized, but some student loans from the federal government, which I think you would qualify for, you'd be fine. If it has a return on investment. Wanna know a dirty little secret? And no, I'm not starting an only [BLEEP]. You're not broke because you suck with money. You just can't see where it's going.

• 1:06:45Caleb Hammer?

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• 1:07:30Caleb Hammer?

  and earn up to 3.5% APY on your savings. And second, my investing app of choice these days is Weebull. And get a 2% match on all of your money that you transfer over. And finally, sign up for automated investing with Acorns. Typically, the signup bonus is only $5, but with my link, you get $20. Ladies and gents, you get money. I get money. Enjoy. Links are in the description below.

• 1:07:53Speaker 03

  I guess I just haven't, um, like, I've always thought it would be like unobtainable based on our financial situation.

• 1:07:59Caleb Hammer?

  The, the general rule is never borrow more than you'll get in the first year of income, based on the job you get from your degree.

• 1:08:05Speaker 03

  Right. I, I mean, I would love to be like a systems manager or something, not have to do with people.

• 1:08:09Caleb Hammer?

  You can do it.

• 1:08:12Caleb Hammer?

  Will he do it?

• 1:08:13Speaker 04

  Probably not.

• 1:08:14Speaker 03

  Let's make a bet. You like to make bets, right?

• 1:08:16Caleb Hammer?

  Make a bet with her. She's betting she'll divorce you.

• 1:08:19Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:08:19Speaker 04

  I literally, we had a bet like a while ago that I would let him get a motorcycle if he got a good paying job.

• 1:08:25Caleb Hammer?

  What's a good paying job?

• 1:08:27Speaker 04

  Like more than me.

• 1:08:28Speaker 03

  Like thirty an hour.

• 1:08:28Caleb Hammer?

  So, school needs to start by, let's say, summer. Summer or fall.

• 1:08:33Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:08:33Caleb Hammer?

  At the latest. That should be the ultimatum. And he needs to complete school. That is also the ultimatum.

• 1:08:40Speaker 03

  Okay, but if I complete school?

• 1:08:42Caleb Hammer?

  It might be a certification, it might be college, it might be trade school, depending on what you're trying to do, but yes.

• 1:08:46Speaker 03

  But let's make this interesting. If I?

• 1:08:48Caleb Hammer?

  No, I don't give a f- you're literally fighting for your marriage. That should be interesting enough, asshole.

• 1:08:52Speaker 03

  But also, I think it would be fun that if you-

• 1:08:55Caleb Hammer?

  I don't care what you think.

• 1:08:56Speaker 03

  I just want you to get in the front seat of the car with me.

• 1:08:58Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know. I would never.

• 1:08:59Speaker 04

  Nobody wants to do that.

• 1:09:01Speaker 03

  Come on.

• 1:09:01Caleb Hammer?

  That is the last I am scared.

• 1:09:03Speaker 03

  Don't be scared.

• 1:09:04Caleb Hammer?

  That is a rational fear.

• 1:09:05Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm. I'm scared. I don't let him drive anywhere.

• 1:09:08Caleb Hammer?

  You drove down here.

• 1:09:09Speaker 04

  Yeah. I drive everywhere.

• 1:09:11Speaker 03

  I'm not allowed to drive.

• 1:09:12Caleb Hammer?

  What is, well, you're past due on this. What is the overall balance? Because I don't even know that.

• 1:09:16Speaker 03

  Uh, I think it's like three thousand.

• 1:09:18Speaker 04

  No, it was, so it's originally twenty-five hundred, but if we don't pay it off within the ninety days, it adds like-

• 1:09:24Caleb Hammer?

  When was this?

• 1:09:26Speaker 04

  October. Yeah.

• 1:09:27Caleb Hammer?

  So ninety days is imminent.

• 1:09:29Speaker 04

  Yep. December second.

• 1:09:31Caleb Hammer?

  And what will the balance be then?

• 1:09:33Speaker 04

  It will add three thousand.

• 1:09:35Caleb Hammer?

  It'll more than double.

• 1:09:36Speaker 04

  Yeah. It's one of those predatory loans.

• 1:09:40Caleb Hammer?

  That you chose.

• 1:09:41Speaker 04

  I didn't have a choice.

• 1:09:42Speaker 03

  We didn't really have a-

• 1:09:43Caleb Hammer?

  Didn't have a choice. You have a choice to let this car just die, because it's gonna cost you money forever.

• 1:09:47Speaker 03

  But I'm-

• 1:09:47Caleb Hammer?

  Also, I thought you said you can fix cars.

• 1:09:49Speaker 03

  I mean, you can, but you can't fix a fucking blown turbo in your garage, dude, like-

• 1:09:53Speaker 04

  That wasn't even for the, for the turbo.

• 1:09:56Speaker 03

  And you can't fix like a fucking block seat issue. You can't fix a fucking, like, no, this car is a piece of shit.

• 1:10:02Caleb Hammer?

  So is it one sixty-four oh six every other week?

• 1:10:06Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm. No, it's like one, now I think it's like one seventy-seven.

• 1:10:11Caleb Hammer?

  Well, yeah, the probably fees being added.

• 1:10:13Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:10:13Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, 164.06 times 2, so every month it's 32812. Listen, I'm a little confused. If we have to pay off 2,500 in 90 days, why are we past due on the most critical debt of all? Because it'll more than double in about a month from now.

• 1:10:32Speaker 04

  Because I didn't have the money for it.

• 1:10:36Caleb Hammer?

  Well, because he wasn't working. But we still spent 2,000 hours on bullshit, minimum.

• 1:10:42Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:10:42Caleb Hammer?

  So what are we talking about? I think 2,500 minimum, actually. So what are we talking about? Like, Q, you did have money. Who's spending? Who's the spender? Yeah. So, Q, there was money to actually pay this off. Oh, you're so fucking quiet now. You're talking all that fucking shit earlier. Yeah. Your bullshit spending in one month could have paid this entire thing off.

• 1:11:01Speaker 04

  Yeah. Well, some of it wasn't bullshit.

• 1:11:04Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, no, let's pull up the Amazon. No, no, no, no, no. Miscellaneous bull- miscellaneous bullshit and going out to eat was 2,500 total. Amazon list. Miscellaneous, 1,200, uh, $218.60 plus $804.17 for going out to eat. So bullshit at a literal minimum, literal minimum right now, is $2,022.77 at a literal minimum is bullshit spending. But there's thousands of unaccounted for that we don't know yet. Unknown shopping is 642. Um, and then additional 500. That we do not, we're not able to allocate, an additional 1,100.

• 1:11:48Caleb Hammer?

  Say, Amazon, sure, let me see the Amazon. Payment revision for half this shit. Or amazing grains for...

• 1:11:55Speaker 04

  That's our dog's food.

• 1:11:56Caleb Hammer?

  Things of cheese sticks, I think. Those are for dogs. We got some yarn coming in.

• 1:12:00Speaker 04

  That's his cord.

• 1:12:02Caleb Hammer?

  Dog harness, I'm sure we didn't have one. Erase, dry erase markers, that's probably not needed. Same with the whiteboard, we don't need that to survive.

• 1:12:09Speaker 04

  I've got it for work.

• 1:12:10Caleb Hammer?

  Prepariment pearl foaming gel, I don't know. But work, fuck off, have them get something. Good molecules hydrating facial gel, how many do we need? Good molecules, good molecules, good molecules. We got like a thousand different good molecule things.

• 1:12:21Speaker 04

  Skincare.

• 1:12:22Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but you got like a thousand different things.

• 1:12:24Speaker 04

  No, I didn't.

• 1:12:24Caleb Hammer?

  Yes, you did. One, two, three, four, five in one day. Different things. When we're literally trying to prevent a debt from more than doubling. Picture frame didn't need to survive. No.

• 1:12:34Speaker 03

  That one was me.

• 1:12:35Caleb Hammer?

  Gift card in a box, we did not need that to survive.

• 1:12:37Speaker 04

  That was a gift.

• 1:12:38Caleb Hammer?

  Magnet iPhone Pro cover, I can, I can, I can do that if it does, if it prevents us from, is this phone new?

• 1:12:45Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:12:46Speaker 04

  Yes, not new, new, no.

• 1:12:48Speaker 03

  No, I probably had it seven, eight months.

• 1:12:53Speaker 03

  Maybe.

• 1:12:53Speaker 04

  That phone case was for my phone.

• 1:12:55Caleb Hammer?

  Is your phone new?

• 1:12:56Speaker 04

  No.

• 1:12:57Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, USB cable, charging brick, USB cable, card holder cable clip, so you didn't need that to survive. 10 grips, 9 11 comp.

• 1:13:09Speaker 03

  That, that, yeah, I had to get, well, I didn't have to get anything. I bought some new grips for my gun.

• 1:13:13Caleb Hammer?

  Some 9 11 grips?

• 1:13:14Speaker 03

  19 11, it's the year it was made.

• 1:13:17Caleb Hammer?

  Making me nervous here. More phone case, oh, but that's been returned.

• 1:13:21Speaker 03

  They did make me leave my bag outside.

• 1:13:22Caleb Hammer?

  There's more skincare, body lotion, dude, all your skin shit, it's like we're up to seven now. When we're trying to prevent a debt from paying off. Neon loop band, I'm sure you had one for your watch, screen protector for the watch, I mean, that's maybe okay. More Himalayan chews for the dogs, I mean, they don't need treats 100%.

• 1:13:40Speaker 03

  I will say that, that, I, I'm gonna defend her here, we have a dog that is a fucking demon, she's half Italian greyhound, half chihuahua. If we don't get her those chews, she destroys the house.

• 1:13:51Caleb Hammer?

  Okay.

• 1:13:52Speaker 03

  So that's the only thing that keeps her from fucking tearing everything up.

• 1:13:54Caleb Hammer?

  Happy birthday banner, we don't need that, hole punches, we don't need it. Gatorade powder hydration shit, no, no, no. Listen, you're doing gamer subs from now on, because one, it's cheaper and two, it tastes better. It's 40 cents a serving or 35 cents a serving, whatever it is. You can get free samples just like this to see what flavor you like, link in the description below, gamersubs.gg, type in code Caleb. So this is the energy drink version, so you can make your energy drinks at home. Oh, but there's also the hydration drink version, and they taste better than Gatorade, trust me. As someone who used to like Gatorade, but now only drinks gamer subs, it's awesome. So no more of that. Yeah, it's all bullshit. That's a party shit. Yeah, it's just, it's so much bullshit. It's endless. We can't be doing that if we're afraid of a debt being doubling.

• 1:14:32Speaker 03

  And I mean, you can see-

• 1:14:33Caleb Hammer?

  It's unacceptable.

• 1:14:34Speaker 03

  I ordered like two things out of that whole [__] thing. The rest is off.

• 1:14:36Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, it's unacceptable.

• 1:14:37Speaker 03

  Like?

• 1:14:38Caleb Hammer?

  Unacceptable.

• 1:14:40Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, some of those stuff was needed.

• 1:14:42Caleb Hammer?

  No, barely, barely.

• 1:14:44Speaker 03

  I mean, like, the Yak Chews is the only thing that I can like.

• 1:14:47Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, a couple of things.

• 1:14:48Speaker 03

  Like, cause our dog, she is a [__] menace. I love her dearly, but she's a feral child, so.

• 1:14:54Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, we owe $990.33 on a Sam's Club card, which is maxed out with interest accruing. Takes three years to pay off with minimum three payments only without purchases, and I'm sure when there's the ability to purchase, you'll do it.

• 1:15:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, unfortunately.

• 1:15:10Caleb Hammer?

  You've had late fees this year, about two.

• 1:15:13Speaker 04

  Oh, I didn't know that.

• 1:15:16Caleb Hammer?

  Why? You're the one that manages the finances. You're the special finance.

• 1:15:19Speaker 04

  Yeah, I didn't know there was late payments.

• 1:15:20Caleb Hammer?

  Two this year!

• 1:15:23Speaker 04

  I didn't know.

• 1:15:24Caleb Hammer?

  So the one that... How's there any chance if the one that is managing the finances doesn't even know about the late fees?

• 1:15:31Speaker 04

  Well, I mean, sometimes it's like I have it set up on auto pay.

• 1:15:34Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, you probably didn't have enough in your checking account.

• 1:15:36Speaker 04

  No, probably not. That's why.

• 1:15:39Speaker 04

  I probably have a lot of late-

• 1:15:41Caleb Hammer?

  What the [__] are we doing?

• 1:15:44Caleb Hammer?

  Don't make me lose hope here, guys. What's Indigo?

• 1:15:47Speaker 04

  It's another credit card.

• 1:15:48Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but like, what's going on?

• 1:15:50Speaker 04

  Um, I, that was one of the credit cards that I took out.

• 1:15:52Caleb Hammer?

  It's over the limit.

• 1:15:53Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:15:54Caleb Hammer?

  What the [__] are we doing? $754.41, limit 700. Fees!

• 1:16:02Caleb Hammer?

  Prestige, oh, Uber Eats. We're Uber Eatsing on a credit card that we can't pay off that is getting fees because we're not able to pay on time and is accruing interest. [__] you. What are we getting on Uber Eats? [__] off.

• 1:16:11Speaker 04

  I, sometimes I'll get lunch at where-

• 1:16:13Caleb Hammer?

  No! Pack a [__] sandwich!

• 1:16:16Speaker 04

  I know, I need to.

• 1:16:17Caleb Hammer?

  That's it. It's easy. It's simple. It's basic. Late fee. Just so we can order Uber Eats and getting bacon smoke. Is that you?

• 1:16:23Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:16:24Speaker 03

  I will say I-

• 1:16:24Caleb Hammer?

  Dude, what the [__] is wrong with you? You're trying to die. You don't do anything and you vape all day. What a [__] joke. Two years to pay off if you don't purchase, but you do on Uber Eats. What a joke! And he was mad on the phone call with Colton when, uh, Colton was asking what you Uber eat. Pisses you off?

• 1:16:39Speaker 03

  It just seems fucking stupid when she spends a bunch of money on groceries to take a fucking.

• 1:16:43Speaker 04

  Well, I have to wake up at four o'clock in the morning.

• 1:16:46Caleb Hammer?

  I don't give a fuck. I can say this the night before. Shut the fuck up. What? What? Shut, shut up. Be an adult. I don't give a shit. You live with your parents. Shut up. I don't care. That's a dumb ass excuse. I don't give a fuck. Make your schedule switch to around when you're, oh my gosh. So you've had a late fee every month this year so far in this car.

• 1:17:04Speaker 04

  Yeah, probably.

• 1:17:07Caleb Hammer?

  That's a joke. It's a pathetic joke. Pathetic joke. Pathetic joke.

• 1:17:17Speaker 04

  Well, I mean, I'm the only one making an like an income, so it's hard to pay all the bills.

• 1:17:22Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but your Uber eating on the card. So no, fuck off.

• 1:17:27Caleb Hammer?

  Instead of 35.9% interest rate of death, kill me now. Milestone. What's going on?

• 1:17:34Speaker 04

  Another credit card I had to take out.

• 1:17:37Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, but now that I know we're doing Uber Eats on it, that had to take out. What are we talking about? I had to take out. You didn't have to do Uber Eats. $675.31 on a limit of 700. Minimum payment $47. Oh, posing into go minimum. Didn't write it down. Minimum for that is 80. So he's just starting to stack. Oh shit, I write that the Sam's Club one either. Okay, Sam's is 40. Okay. And then again, with the milestone card, great fees, interest.

• 1:18:07Caleb Hammer?

  Purchases. Two years to pay off. It's another Uber Eats. Pull up your Uber Eats. Now.

• 1:18:14Speaker 04

  I don't have my phone with me. It's in my purse.

• 1:18:18Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, let me see. Let me see.

• 1:18:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, your fucking turn, dude.

• 1:18:26Caleb Hammer?

  McDonald's yesterday.

• 1:18:27Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:18:28Caleb Hammer?

  McDonald's yesterday. McDonald's breakfast yesterday for $20. And then two days before that, Granny Berry. Two days before that, Granny Berry. 26. 26 with the eight. The Jersey Mike's one day before that. Oh, the Chipotle's at McDonald's. The Taco Bell, McDonald's, McDonald's, McDonald's, Panera in public. Oh.

• 1:18:50Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, you even celebrated 9/11 with Panera. Late on every month this year so far.

• 1:18:59Caleb Hammer?

  Is this another Indigo or did I? Yeah, it is.

• 1:19:01Speaker 04

  I have two of them.

• 1:19:02Caleb Hammer?

  What the fuck is happening here? It's over the limit.

• 1:19:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:19:06Caleb Hammer?

  Sir, is there hope here, ladies and gentlemen? There must be. Listen, I'm gonna put you guys through our Master Your Money series, where you got our Master Your Debt, Master Your Investing, Master Your Budget, Master Your Real Estate, everything you'll need to know in the world of personal finances. I'll put you through it for free. Halehammer.com for you guys, obviously, but it comes with the Dollar Wise Budgeting app, premium version as well. Um, but you guys gotta start learning the basics, because this is a disaster. The Uber Eats is insane. The lack of budgeting, the not knowing about late fees, insane, insane. You have, you are taking the classes together, guys. It is not an option. Take them together. It has changed tons of thousands of people's lives for a reason. Please, take the quizzes, go through them, be very intentional. It'll take you hours, because it's literally five classes.

• 1:19:51Caleb Hammer?

  Five extensive, very detailed, made by financial professional classes.

• 1:19:57Caleb Hammer?

  With me as the face, but it's okay.

• 1:20:02Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, fee, oh my gosh, yeah, it's fees and interest. Okay, so let's see, yeah. Five sixty-five and twelve cents. A five hundred dollar limit, the payment of forty dollars is due. Late, uh, half the months this year at a minimum, thirty percent interest.

• 1:20:19Caleb Hammer?

  Over the limit, what an insane, okay, quick server, who's this, what's going on?

• 1:20:23Speaker 04

  All of the credit cards of mine.

• 1:20:25Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, and you wouldn't go get a job, you're a piece of shit. Yo, five oh eight point nine four on a five hundred limit with a minimum payment of twenty-five. Three years to pay off if we don't purchase, I'm sure you do. There it is, you did, sixty-eight bucks. Let's see what we got. You went into Kroger and spent on a card that was max?

• 1:20:45Speaker 04

  I don't know what I went in there for.

• 1:20:47Caleb Hammer?

  Why? Do you Uber Eats every second of your life? Sometimes Uber Eats, and then I look and it's almost every day, it's every other day, minimum. Interest fee, you're late half the months this year so far. What a joke, thirty percent interest rate. Credit one, who is this? Or what's going on with this? By the way, credit one, worst of the worst of the worst of the worst. If you have this, you're the worst credit card person ever imaginable.

• 1:21:12Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:21:12Caleb Hammer?

  Chakra over the limit, yo, four seventy-three, thirty-six. Limit four fifty.

• 1:21:19Caleb Hammer?

  Minimum due 90. Well, usually 60, but you passed through 30. Nope, normally 30, but you passed through two months. Why? Yeah, passed through every month. Year later. Joke. What a joke. What are we doing? Why wouldn't you want to step up and at least get involved in the numbers? I understand you weren't working and being a piece of shit, but you're home all day. Why can't you sit down and look at shit? Huh?

• 1:21:42Speaker 03

  She says she had it handled.

• 1:21:44Caleb Hammer?

  Why'd you say that? That's objectively incorrect.

• 1:21:47Speaker 03

  She says she had it handled.

• 1:21:48Speaker 04

  Well, that's because he won't take any part in our finances whatsoever.

• 1:21:52Caleb Hammer?

  Blame, blame, blame. None of us are able to say, yeah, I [__] up.

• 1:21:55Speaker 03

  You know, I should be more involved and that's.

• 1:21:57Speaker 00

  This episode is brought to you by Indeed. You're ready to level up your business, but the pressure to find the right person to make that happen is intense. Indeed sponsored jobs can help carry the load. It boosts your job post to help it reach quality talent fast. Cut through the chaos with Indeed sponsored jobs. Get a $75 sponsored job credit at indeed.com/podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Hiring now? Then this is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs.

• 1:22:26Speaker 03

  Kind of why we're doing this.

• 1:22:27Caleb Hammer?

  What a [__] joke. Mattress firm? So you go through one a month? 2,000?

• 1:22:33Speaker 03

  Hey, you know how I got this [__] fat, Caleb? Every time I [__] your mom, she makes me a sandwich. That's how I got this [__] fat. So if we want to keep going with the fat jokes, we can go there.

• 1:22:43Caleb Hammer?

  She is way out of your league, my friend. She would never touch you.

• 1:22:46Speaker 03

  I mean, are you sure? Cause I was dating my buddy's moms in high school. So like, what's [__] you?

• 1:22:51Caleb Hammer?

  Well, that's very weird of you and your buddy's mom. Listen, I haven't posted a picture of my mom on social media, but I did post a picture of my dad and the [__] chat lost their damn minds and gooned. So they're out of your league. $2,068 owed on here. $71 minimum payment, three years takes to pay this off. Is there deferred interest happening?

• 1:23:15Speaker 04

  No, it's interest free.

• 1:23:17Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, then if there's no deferred interest, then I'm not freaking out about that. Oh my gosh, this target has to be this.

• 1:23:24Caleb Hammer?

  Worst text I've ever seen in my life.

• 1:23:27Caleb Hammer?

  $295.53.

• 1:23:32Caleb Hammer?

  $295.53 It's up because you purchased and it fades. Oh, you guys can't do anything. Both of you are a complete disaster. You can't do anything. Forty-one is the normal minimum payment, but we had a late fee. Who's surprised? You guys can't do shit. Okay, regular Capital One. My gosh.

• 1:23:52Caleb Hammer?

  It was $44.72 in purchases. Why? $286.84 owed on here. Limit 300. Both of your credits must be destroyed. $25 payment, Uber Eats and DoorDash. Hey, pull up your DoorDash now. I don't have the DoorDash app anymore. Motherfucker. I don't. I don't use DoorDash.

• 1:24:09Speaker 03

  We're about to check that because I'm pretty sure she's still passing on there because I'm pretty sure I saw a DoorDash thing come through literally the other fucking day.

• 1:24:15Caleb Hammer?

  No, it's just Uber Eats. We've been late.

• 1:24:18Speaker 03

  Let me see here.

• 1:24:20Caleb Hammer?

  And it's destroyed.

• 1:24:21Speaker 03

  Oh, so you deleted that shit before we came over here.

• 1:24:24Caleb Hammer?

  No, I haven't. Let me in both y'all's phone real quick. Xena has Apple Care Plus. That's okay. But then two Apple Care Pluses. iCloud Plus, that's fine. Lose it. You do not need to pay $40 for weight loss. What are we doing? I don't pay. Just get, get, what? Yes, you do. It's right there. You tit. It's literally right there. And you also just signed up for it this month. I thought it was free. Or you signed up for a year ago. I don't know. Um. Well, ad block, but you canceled that. Apple Care is okay. You pay for GPT. I love GPT. It's fun. It's fun.

• 1:24:55Speaker 03

  I use it to like make my resumes when I was applying.

• 1:24:58Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, my. What a joke.

• 1:25:00Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, like if you look at it.

• 1:25:01Caleb Hammer?

  iCloud Plus. Listen, you just can't afford shit. I'm glad you at least canceled Discord. I think that's all your debt. We have negative $86.36 in our checking account. Yep. What is hap-

• 1:25:15Caleb Hammer?

  Then why does this page exist? Because if it's highlighted, it's bullshit or potential bullshit. Why does this page exist if we're negative $86 in our checking account? Why? Why the possibly? Barbecue, Velvet Taco, Bojangles, Amazon, Amazon, Applebell, Amazon, Brahms, Whataburger, Applebell, Amazon, Costco. Uh, well, Costco, maybe those groceries. Maybe it's not. It's kind of cheap. So I don't know. Toret, Applebell, Amazon, McDonald's. Pop shelf!

• 1:25:45Caleb Hammer?

  Get it's a bullshit. Get it's a bullshit. Go in and get it's a bullshit from Q2. QT, Amazon, TJ Maxx, McDonald's bullshit, McDonald's PayPal, PayPal, Appleville, Appleville bullshit. You stop in at 7-Eleven to get it's bullshit. $3.79 probably energy drinks, right? Yeah. Yeah, you're making them a home with gamer subs now. 35 cents a serving. Apple, my booster. There's not anything on here that is necessary. And yet we're negative.

• 1:26:11Speaker 03

  The pirate ship is like what we use to ship out our orders that come from the jewelry business.

• 1:26:16Caleb Hammer?

  You don't know what you're doing. Amazon, Sonic, Dutch Bros PayPal, PayPal. And more distribution. He, HTO, HTO. Appleville bullshit. McDonald's bullshit, bullshit. Actually, that one was gas. I'll get you that one. National Enterprise, pirate ship, Panda Express bullshit. Mexican, Amazon, Amazon. It keeps going. Fine jewelry, $218. What are we doing? No, that's for his business. Shut the fuck up business. You don't make money. Or his gay jewelry. Yeah. Pirate ship. Flat wearable, Apple, Chewy, Pawn, Pawn? 380 Pawn? Dutch Bros, Pirate Ship. H R!

• 1:27:01Caleb Hammer?

  Fuck your gun. Lay Jurs? Withdraw was rejected. Taco Bell going in and some BS. Mr. Dumplings, vape and smoke. McDonald's, gems. Oh, it keeps going. Yet we're negative. You guys are morons. You guys are uncontrollable. You guys are living at home with your parents. Pathetic. Taco Bell PayPal, Taco Bell, Apple, Apple, McDonald's, Brahms, Appleville, Dutch Bros, sushi, Amazon, Whataburger. Pirate Ship, Apple, TikTok, Sam's Club, McDonald's bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. It keeps going!

• 1:27:35Caleb Hammer?

  Oh, which are all rejected, yet we're going and getting bullshit every day, multiple times a day. Chick-fil-A, Chick-fil-A, PayPal, Dunkin', bullshit, bullshit, Dunkin', Apple, Apple, Amazon, Taco Bell, Bar and Chip, Applebell, Ranger, getting old house guests, PayPal, Applebell. It keeps going. Taco Bell, Apple, Apple, Apple. I don't know what you're getting with Apple, but you're Apple paying constantly. I would have to look through that, but I bet it's all bullshit because I'm sure you're somewhere. Another which are all rejected, who would have thought bullshit? Taco Bell, Dunkin', Amazon, what a fucking joke. And that's it. I don't see retirement, I don't see savings. You guys are done. Nah. There is no way. I'm gonna try to budget this.

• 1:28:20Caleb Hammer?

  But

• 1:28:23Caleb Hammer?

  with your behavior. Woo! Good the luck. Six thousand dollars. Do you have to pay rent and utilities to the household?

• 1:28:33Speaker 03

  We do.

• 1:28:34Caleb Hammer?

  What? How much?

• 1:28:35Speaker 03

  We pay eight hundred a month.

• 1:28:38Caleb Hammer?

  Is there not like a cheaper one bed place you can live in that small ass town?

• 1:28:41Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:28:42Speaker 04

  No.

• 1:28:42Caleb Hammer?

  Debt payments. Let's figure this out.

• 1:28:47Caleb Hammer?

  Good luck. Your minimum monthly debt payments alone, which by the way, you, one thousand eight hundred fifty-five dollars and forty cents. What's your phone bill?

• 1:28:59Speaker 04

  Uh, two sixteen.

• 1:29:02Caleb Hammer?

  Two sixteen or two sixty?

• 1:29:03Speaker 04

  Two sixteen.

• 1:29:04Speaker 03

  Tell them why.

• 1:29:05Speaker 04

  But we also

• 1:29:06Caleb Hammer?

  I don't even give a

• 1:29:07Speaker 03

  Oh, it's important.

• 1:29:08Speaker 04

  We also pay his parents' phone bill.

• 1:29:10Caleb Hammer?

  Die, die, die.

• 1:29:12Speaker 03

  I don't even talk to him. She's the one who chooses to fucking pay.

• 1:29:14Caleb Hammer?

  Die, die. How do groceries work in this household?

• 1:29:18Speaker 04

  Uh, we buy our own groceries.

• 1:29:20Caleb Hammer?

  Six hundred dollars for groceries, use the meal plan, gas, vroom, vroom, drive, drive. I know you guys drive far. How much for each?

• 1:29:27Speaker 04

  Like

• 1:29:27Speaker 03

  I take about forty, forty bucks every two days.

• 1:29:32Speaker 04

  Every two days?

• 1:29:33Speaker 03

  When I'm, when I'm actually working.

• 1:29:34Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:29:35Caleb Hammer?

  Well, I have a month. On a month, how much in gas asshole?

• 1:29:39Speaker 04

  I think probably like five hundred a month.

• 1:29:41Caleb Hammer?

  Both combined?

• 1:29:42Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:29:43Caleb Hammer?

  Car insurances?

• 1:29:44Speaker 04

  Ooh, um. Our car insurance is very expensive.

• 1:29:48Caleb Hammer?

  How much?

• 1:29:49Speaker 04

  It's six thirty-six.

• 1:29:52Caleb Hammer?

  $150 TP fund, anything else to survive? Are there copays for medical things we're doing quite often?

• 1:29:58Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:29:58Caleb Hammer?

  How much a month?

• 1:29:59Speaker 04

  $100.

• 1:30:00Caleb Hammer?

  Is there a gym?

• 1:30:01Speaker 04

  No, obviously.

• 1:30:03Caleb Hammer?

  Uh, subscriptions, I will try 40. You have pets?

• 1:30:08Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:30:09Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, that's right. The dog, right?

• 1:30:10Speaker 04

  Two.

• 1:30:10Caleb Hammer?

  Two. Ages and health?

• 1:30:12Speaker 04

  Um, one of them is a year old. She's perfectly fine.

• 1:30:15Caleb Hammer?

  Other one?

• 1:30:16Speaker 04

  Um, he's six and he has IVDD, so he doesn't-

• 1:30:19Caleb Hammer?

  I don't know if that qualifies. I'll at least give $50 for pet insurance.

• 1:30:22Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:30:22Caleb Hammer?

  How much for pet food?

• 1:30:23Speaker 04

  Uh, 70 a month.

• 1:30:26Caleb Hammer?

  Anything else that needs to be in your budget that's not gonna work?

• 1:30:29Speaker 04

  Uh, I don't think so. Do you think, can you think of it? No, probably not.

• 1:30:34Caleb Hammer?

  Yeah, I mean, you guys still have a thousand left over. Will your parents not? Will, will your parents let you live there for free for a second?

• 1:30:39Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:30:40Caleb Hammer?

  If, well, under, under the only agreement that they allow you, that they only do that if you're getting your shit together.

• 1:30:50Speaker 04

  Yeah, my daughter said that he would, uh, not charge us rent.

• 1:30:54Caleb Hammer?

  Okay, well, you got an extra 982 a month, well, let's take away that 800 as well for rent. It gives an extra $1,782 a month. No bullshit spending, no nothing. Your guys' debt is ruined, destroyed, kill me. It's horrendous. Yeah, this is your behavior. Like, if there's any indication, like, this is one of the most disastrous behavioral things I have ever seen in my life, which is why I'm like, the fuck luck, guys. But, I mean, yeah, I mean, you can take care of it. You can take care of it in about three years, which is not that bad. It's fine for most adults on this show. Go work, get, you know, put in some time for school, get some extra money on the side, and get a better paying job, get some raises, get a better paying job, work on moving up in career.

• 1:31:36Caleb Hammer?

  You can probably pay this off in two and a half years, but it all comes down to behavior change, and nothing in here shows any behavior change. Use the Dollar Wise app. Good the luck, guys. Then get a fully funded emergency fund, then you need to live 50, 30, 20, maybe go out, uh, and live on your own, but you gotta at least start contributing 20% to retirement. Once we have that six-month emergency fund, after you pay off the debt, and do it after three years, but that's it. That relies on behavior change, so. I don't know.

• 1:32:01Speaker 04

  I did just get a second job too.

• 1:32:03Caleb Hammer?

  Well, good, because that'll help speed it up, but none of that matters if we don't blow all of our income, which is what you guys do. Join us in the post show. Let's get the Hammer Financial Score first, though. Spending in your budget, overspent, debt, IRS, zero out of 10. Emergency fund, nothing, zero out of 10. Retirement, nothing, zero. Okay, Hammer Financial Score, easy as it gets, zero out of 10. Click that join button for an extra 20 minutes of this episode. There's always extra hidden things that we'll talk about with the producers. And three premium shows posted every single day, Monday through Friday. I'll see you there. No, you lost your old apartment, you own [bleep] to them? You own [bleep] of your old [bleep] apartment?

• 1:32:39Speaker 03

  I think it's kind of [bleep] that I only knew about a few of those credit cards.

• 1:32:43Speaker 04

  You've known about a few of them.

• 1:32:45Speaker 03

  A few is not [bleep] all of them. What is this? We're doing the whole schoolyard thing? Ew, what the stupid [bleep] smirk off your face?

• 1:32:51Speaker 04

  Talk when your [bleep] hairline grows back.

• 1:32:54Speaker 03

  We, we for real?

• 1:32:55Speaker 04

  The only reason you're yelling at me is because there's a room full of people.

• 1:32:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, because it's the only time I feel [bleep] safe. Normally I argue with a [bleep] table in between us because you're [bleep] crazy.

• 1:33:04Speaker 05

  Thanks for watching. For more premium content, join Hammer Elite this month for free and discover what the number one membership on the platform has to offer.

• 1:33:16Speaker 05

  See description for more details.

• 1:33:19Speaker 07

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